Physics 101 (by the Tahoe Ladies)


Summary:  Adam becomes the ‘butt’ of a joke…

Rated: K+  Word Count:  730


Physics 101

Joe nudged his big brother Hoss in the ribs. “Look, Hoss. Adam’s gonna walk right into that wall.” He chuckled as Adam did just that.

“Adam sure don’t seem to be keeping his mind on things lately,” Hoss said as he crossed the walk to help Adam to his feet.

It was true. Adam had been very, very distracted lately. He didn’t even seem to take pleasure in yelling at Joe when he goofed off. No one seemed to have any idea what the problem was with, except they knew he wasn’t in love. He was still dating at least two girls, and he wasn’t particularly serious about either of them.

“Boy, ain’t that the truth! It’s like he’s walking around in a daze, or something. Are you sure it isn’t female related?” Joe pestered as he followed Hoss. By the time he got there, Adam was already to his feet and brushing the dust from his clothes.

“I don’t need your help!” Adam hissed, pulling his arm from Hoss’ grip easily.

Joe hung back, half behind Hoss. And for good reason. He had privately wondered all his life, which was longer: Adam’s arm or his patience. So, considering that here lately, his patience was considerably shorter, just for safety’s sake, Joe kept Hoss between he and Adam.

“Looks like you need somebody’s help,” Joe snipped and got “the look” from oldest brother that other men would wither under. But Joe seemed to be immune from it. After all, he had grown up with it. It hadn’t fazed him at six, or ten, or now at twenty-two.

“Just mind your own business, you two!” Adam snapped back then turning abruptly to depart from them, walked back into the same wall. This time with considerable force. And relearned one of the laws of physics that has to do with immovable objects and moving ones.

Half the people on the street turned to look once they heard Joe laughing. What they saw was Adam sitting on the walk, Hoss leaning over him and Joe, leaning against the porch upright, laughing and holding his sides. Most of the people smiled at the happy sound and, shaking their heads in wonder, moved on.

“Well, now, Big Brother, we will mind our own business. That is once we get you pointed away from this here wall somebody seems to keep moving in your way.”


Hoss did his best to maintain a straight face while helping Adam to his feet but once Adam was again brushing himself down and turned away from him, the big man let loose with his own tremendous laugh.

Now Adam had two choices, he felt. The first one was to give into impulse and give the two laughing hyenas a taste of knuckle sandwich. The second was to walk away, leaving them in his dust, so to speak. To his eternal credit, he thought, he turned on his heel and strode away from them, back straight, shoulders square, chin out and hat settled firmly on his head. For good measure, he let his hand drop down and adjust his revolver in its holster. When he heard the cackling and whooping behind him increase in volume, he continued on, determined not to let them rattle him.

“Think we need to go tell him?” Hoss finally got out, wiping the tears of laughter from his face. By this time, Joe could no longer stay standing and had sunk onto the steps, he was so weak from laughing.

“No, he’ll figure it eventually.” Joe wheezed then began laughing again.

“When?” Hoss joined Joe on the step.

“The way he’s been lately, probably when he gets undressed tonight to go to bed.” Once again Joe collapsed into laughter, his arm pointing at his oldest brother’s retreating form.

Hoss wiped away another tear from his cheek. “You’re probably right, Joe. But he better be glad of one thing.”

Joe, laid back on the walk, couldn’t even respond to his brother’s bait.

“That he put on them red flannels this morning!” Hoss joined his brother on the walkway.

For unbeknownst to Adam, but known to the rest of the world, the last impact with the walkway had been just a little too much for the back seam of his dark jeans.


The end, snicker snicker



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