Story Summary:    This story centers on Joe and Jenny Cartwright and takes place about a year after Annie My Love.
Rating and Reader Alerts:  PG, mild language
Words:  30,025

Cartwright Romance Series

Truth Be Told
Second Sight
Heart and Home
Journey
Katherine, My Love
Annie, My Love
Jenny, My Love

---

 

The Brandsters have included this story by this author in our project: Preserving Their Legacy. To preserve the legacy of the author, we have decided to give their work a home in the Bonanza Brand Fanfiction Library.  The author will always be the owner of this work of fanfiction, and should they wish us to remove their story, we will.

---

Jenny, My Love

Chapter 1
*********

As she circled around the dining room table in the Ponderosa ranch house across from her husband, Jenny Cartwright’s lilting laughter filled the air.  “Now, Joe!” she reprimanded, as she sidled around the table, moving hand-over-hand behind the chairs as her husband mirrored her movements on the opposite side as they warily faced each other, a delicate dance playing out.  “Now, Joe, I was only teasing!” she defended herself.  “I know Cochise is a fast horse.”

“Oh, you know that, do you?” Joe grinned menacingly, stealthily moving closer, a gleam in his eyes, as Jenny just as stealthily moved away.

“Why, sure he is.  Didn’t he beat Matt Hendry’s old nag just last week?” Jenny innocently offered.

“What!?  Why you…!” Joe cursed the insult to his horse, the insult providing the impetus to bolt around the table after his wife.  Letting out a squeal, Jenny dashed away, pulling a chair out behind her to thwart her husband’s attempt to catch her.  Reaching the front door, Jenny flung it wide and raced out, her husband delayed by the obstacle in his path, climbing over it before he too raced out the open door in hot pursuit.  Turning round the side of the house, Jenny headed off towards the creek, fisting her raised skirts in her hands as she ran, laughing and shrieking simultaneously.  Coming up to the creek, she paused a second as she raised a foot onto a log in her path, exposing a shapely stockinged calf.  Tossing her head back, she looked over her shoulder to check her husband’s position, her hair swinging riotously around her head like ribbons around a maypole.   Letting out another shriek at Joe’s proximity, she quickly turned, stepping over the log to continue on, not getting very far before Joe came up on her to catch her in his arms.  Tumbling to the soft earth amid both of their shouts of laughter, Joe threatened, “That’s the last time you insult MY horse!!” as he rolled them both over onto a grassy patch of earth, pinning his wife beneath him as he captured her wrists above her head with his hands.

Both of them breathing hard with their exertion, Jenny pleaded innocently, “Joe, I’d NEVER insult your horse!  The very idea!” 

“Oh yeah?  Well, I’ve got you now!” he taunted, as he struggled to keep his squirming wife still.

“Only because I can’t run as fast when I’m wearing a dress!” Jenny protested her restriction, her eyes glowing with laughter.

Looking down at his wife as she lay beneath him, Joe grew subdued as he quietly took in her appearance.  She was wearing a dress alright, and a very fetching one at that, the light pinkish material clinging to her frame in a most pleasing way.  The pink of the gown only enhanced the pink of her cheeks, now flushed from exertion.  Her pale blond hair spilled onto the grass around her, framing her face with its billowy masses.  Noting the change in her husband’s demeanour as he perused her, Jenny stopped struggling, the laughter dying on her lips as their eyes locked and they stared silently at each other with sudden acute awareness.  “But I like you in a dress, Jenny,” Joe finally breathed, his voice low and sultry.

“You-you do?” Jenny stammered.

“Hmm,” Joe answered, nodding slightly as he removed one of his hands from her wrists to run a finger along her jawline.

Inhaling sharply at his touch, Jenny waited in expectant anticipation.  A moment or two passed as Joe lazily ran his finger from her jaw down to the base of her throat, circling the hollow with a featherlight touch, his eyes intent on his task.  Already breathless from her husband’s attentions, Jenny wondered at the delay.  “Aren’t you going to kiss me, Joe?” she asked, as Joe looked up to meet her eyes, his brow raised at his wife’s prompting question.  “I mean, after all, I did let you win the race,” she informed him, blushing slightly as she wondered belatedly if she’d been too bold with her question.

“You let me….” Joe choked, repeating her words.  Laughing out loud, he protested, “You did not let me win!  I won fair and square!” as Jenny resumed wiggling in his arms. 

“The dress!  I told you I can’t run….” was all Jenny got out before she felt herself rolled a few more times, finally coming to a halt on top of her husband, her hair resting to one side over her shoulder.  Laughing down at him as he laughed back up at her, she reached for his arms, pinning them above his head.  “Who’s got who now?” she taunted boldly.

Suddenly becoming very serious as he regarded the vision of loveliness above him, Joe swallowed hard.  “You’ve got me, Jenny,” he conceded on a whisper, staring intently at her.  “You’ve always got me, Jenny.”

“Joe…,” Jenny breathed at the surprise declaration as she returned his stare.  Releasing his hands, she brought one of her own to lay tenderly along the side of his face as Joe reached a hand up inside her cascading hair to mimic her action. 

A note of awe in his voice, Joe whispered, the apple of his throat bobbing erratically, “You’re so beautiful, Jenny.  Sometimes…sometimes I can’t even breathe when I look at you.”

“Joe…,” Jenny whispered, stunned at his words.  “Joe, I…,” 

“Shh,” Joe interrupted, reaching his arms about her to draw her down close to him.  Raising his head slightly from the ground, his lips sought hers and he groaned when he found what he sought. The kiss deepened quickly as he tightened his arms about her, tremors of passion coursing through them both, as Jenny curved her hands under his arms to clasp the back of his shoulders. 

“Joe…Joe…,” Jenny managed after a moment or two when they came up for air, both of them weakened and overwhelmed by their shared passion.  “Joe, we should go back,” Jenny breathed the instruction, as oblivious to her words, her husband trailed kisses along her face.  “The others will be wondering where we are,” Jenny informed him on a whisper, closing her eyes rapturously at the pleasure knifing through her body.

“Let them wonder, Jenny,” Joe instructed on a groan, his trail leading him back to his wife’s lips as he paused there a moment, drinking his fill, before moving on, trailing kisses towards the side of her neck.

“And…and then there’s Cochise,” Jenny noted breathlessly, trying to be the voice of reason in the midst of desire.  “If you don’t take him out for his practice run, he’ll never beat Matt Hendry’s nag.”

“What?” Joe blinked, her words permeating his foggy brain as he pulled back to stare up at his wife.  Seeing the mischief twinkling in her eyes, he feigned outrage to rebuke, “I thought I told you never to insult my horse again!”

“Just telling the truth, Joe,” Jenny taunted innocently before she quickly scrambled from his embrace and bolted back towards the ranch house, knowing the reaction her words would provoke.

“Why you….!” Joe cursed laughingly, rising on an elbow a second to watch as his wife sprinted away before he rose to sprint after her, a delighted grin on his face.

***********
“Hey Hoss, would you help me reach that cobweb up there?” Annie asked her husband as she stood in the great room of the ranch house, duster in hand, eyeing the troublesome intrusion. 

Hoss followed his wife’s gaze upwards to the high spot above the gun rack.  “Annie, I cain’t reach that.  It’s too high up,” he complained, wondering that she just didn’t ignore it.  It’s not like anyone else noticed it was there.

“Hoss, prop me up on your shoulder.  I’m sure I could reach it then,” Annie countered, not about to let the cobweb reside in her clean house.

Sighing, Hoss moved to do as he was bidded, lifting his wife onto one shoulder as she moved an arm in around his head to his other shoulder for support.

Entering the room from the kitchen, followed by her husband, Katherine brushed past the ornate figurine on the side table in the dining room.  Letting out a little gasp as the figurine fell from the table and smashed onto the floor, Katherine was quick with her apology.  “Oh Annie, I’m sorry!” she said, a hand to her mouth as she surveyed the disarray of sharp glass below her. 

Looking over her shoulder from her place propped on her husband’s shoulder, Annie replied matter-of-factly, “Don’t worry about it, Katherine.  I’ll clean it up in a minute,” used to her sister-in-law’s acts of clumsiness as she turned her attention back to the elusive cobweb.  “A little more to the left, Hoss,” she instructed, waving the duster.  “I’ve almost got it.”

“No, Annie, I broke it.  I’ll clean it up,” Katherine corrected, falling to her knees to carefully begin piling the shards of glass into a neat pile.  Coming around his wife, Adam also knelt, silently moving to assist his wife with the clean-up.

“Left, Hoss, not right!” Annie shouted, still chasing the cobweb.

“Be careful, Katherine!” Adam rebuked at Katherine’s small cry of pain as she cut her finger on a piece of glass, raising the injured digit to suck on the wound.  “Let me have a look,” Adam commanded, reaching out to pry his wife’s hand away from her mouth. 

“It’s alright, Adam!” Katherine retorted, jerking her hand back, annoyed with herself for first her clumsiness for knocking the figurine over and now the cut to her finger.  “Just help me get this cleaned up,” she grumbled, turning her attention back to the task at hand as Adam sighed, rolling his eyes slightly before complying with her wishes.

Suddenly the front door swung wide and Jenny raced breathlessly into the room, followed a scant second or two later by her husband, hot on her heels.  “Stop it, Joe!” Jenny shrieked, racing around the settee, her husband in pursuit. 

“Jenny Cartwright, you’re in BIG trouble!” Joe threatened.

“Oh, yeah?” Jenny countered as they squared off on either end of the settee, their hands on the armrests as they weaved left and right.  “Well, you have to catch me first!” she challenged, grabbing a small cushion from the settee and tossing it at him as Joe ducked, the soft projectile sailing over his head.

“Oh, I’ll catch you!” Joe threatened with bravado, bolting to his right as Jenny squealed and bolted around the settee, the chase resumed.

“A little higher, Hoss, I’ve almost got it!” Annie commanded, waving the duster high above her.

“Annie, that’s as high as I can get ya,” Hoss complained. 

“Adam, can you get those pieces under the table?” Katherine pointed to the wayward pieces of glass as her husband crawled under the furniture to retrieve them.  Forgetting for a second his position, he straightened, letting out a yelp of pain as he banged his head on the underside of the table, pulling out with a hand to his tender scalp.  “Let me have a look, Adam,” Katherine ordered, reaching over.

“Katherine, it’s alright!” Adam’s replied testily, annoyed with himself, as he brushed off his wife’s attempts to inspect his injury. 

“Adam!” Katherine reprimanded warningly, pulling his hand away from his head and tilting his head over to meet her inspection. 

“Leave me alone, Joe!” Jenny cried laughingly, completing another round of the settee.

“Higher, Hoss!” Annie ordered.

“Oww!  Don’t TOUCH it!!” Adam whined, his head bowed to his wife’s inspection as she gently probed the rapidly forming bump.

“WHAT IN TARNATION IS GOING ON?”  Ben Cartwright boomed from the open doorway, not believing the sight that greeted his eyes upon his arrival home.  Joe and Jenny racing about the settee like a couple of ten-year-olds, cushions tossed onto the floor.  Hoss hoisting Annie precariously onto one shoulder while she waved a duster futilely in the air and Adam and Katherine sprawled on the floor, surrounded by glass, pieces of which bore a strong resemblance to a figurine that he somehow suspected he no longer owned.

Freezing at her father-in-law’s words, Jenny came to a sudden standstill at the end of the settee just as Joe came up on her, slamming into her as they both toppled backwards over the armrest onto the settee, Joe wrapping his arms around his wife in a feeble attempt to avert the fall.  Landing softly on his back on the cushioned upholstery, Joe raised himself on his arms, his wife face down atop him, as they both raised their heads to peer guiltily over the back of the settee towards the booming voice.

“H-hey, Pa,” Joe greeted his father meekly, stammering a little as he raised a hesitant hand in greeting only to redirect his hand to run through his hair at his father’s expression of stern disapproval.

“Hoss, put me down,” Annie whispered urgently, tapping her husband’s shoulder as Hoss gulped some air, swallowing hard as he complied. 

“Hey, Pa, you’re back early,” Hoss observed nervously, setting his wife on the ground before straightening back up.

“Hmm,” Ben at least acknowledged his second son’s words.  Rising from his place on the floor, Adam reached down to help his wife to her feet, brushing the wrinkles from her skirt as she stood.  “Don’t worry about the figurine, Pa.  Katherine and I will pick you up another one when we go to San Francisco this summer.”

“Hmm,” Ben grumbled again.  “I’m going out to see to my horse.  Maybe when I get back I’ll find a home instead of a three-ring circus!” Ben boomed, casting an arm in the air before turning away and heading out the door.

Hearing the muted shuffles and whispers behind him from the open door as his three sons and three daughters-in-law scrambled to put aright the room, Ben smiled.    Oh, he’d been a little stern and disapproving back there but it was mostly just show.    It was true he could do without the chaos he’d witnessed back there but the chaos kind of went hand-in-hand with something else that he wouldn’t part with for the world.  Yes, Ben Cartwright had to admit it.  His home was filled with something now and he didn’t care if twenty three-ring circuses took up permanent residence, just as long as it was there too.  Leading his horse to the barn, Ben sent a silent prayer to the heavens, grateful for what he’d been given, grateful for his sons and his daughters and his grandchildren, grateful for what they filled his home to overflowing with.  Leading his horse through the barn doors, Ben stopped, closing his eyes a moment as the prayer of gratitude ran through his mind.  So much to be thankful for, so many blessings for just one man.  The love and the laughter, the joy and contentment.  But above all else, he was grateful for one thing.  The thing he’d witnessed back there a moment ago, bursting from every corner, from every seam in that house.

Ben Cartwright was grateful for life.
Chapter 2
*********

“So we’re all agreed?” Katherine Cartwright asked the other women members of the Virginia City Beautification Society as they sat in the great room of her large ranch house.  “We’ll ask council to support our motion to build additional sidewalks on those streets now lacking them?” she clarified the group’s position.  Nods and murmurs of approval meeting her suggestion, Katherine summarized, “Well, it’s agreed then.  Let’s move on to the issue of trash in the alleys.  Now, Mrs. Clark, I believe you were telling us…..,” Katherine stopped as several of the ladies looked beyond her head and inhaled sharply, their faces expressions of deep shock, just as Katherine was startled by the male voices behind her.

“Whew, am I glad that’s finished!  What a hot day to be felling trees!” one voice said.

“You got that right, Joe, I….,” Hoss Cartwright suddenly stopped, both he and his brother Little Joe freezing as they came into the room from the kitchen and saw all the women perched on various settees and chairs just as several of the women raised their hands to cover their mouths.

Recognizing her brother-in-law’s voices as they entered the room behind her, Katherine wondered for a second why the women in the room appeared so shocked.  Well, she wondered for only that second before she turned to look at her brothers-in-law, emitting her own shocked inhalation at the sight.  Her brothers-in-law were standing not far behind her, naked from the waist up, a towel in each of their hands, their gaping mouths mirroring the women they faced.

“Hey Hoss, did you tally the number of trees we felled today?” Adam asked as he came into the room, just as shirtless as his brothers and looking down as he ran a towel over his torso.  Coming up to his brothers, he finally raised his head, freezing at the sight of all the women assembled in the room, the towel suddenly motionless in his hand.

The first one to regain her senses, Katherine rose to her feet.  “Adam?” she began.  “Adam, you didn’t forget this was the day for the Beautification Society meeting, did you?” she asked accusingly, her eyes telegraphing her alarm as she widened her eyes deliberately at him.

“Ah..ah…,” Adam faltered, his eyes darting around the room at all the women. 

“You know, I think it’s time I got back to the Ponderosa,” Hoss suddenly announced in acute embarrassment as he turned from the room.

“Yeah, and Jenny’ll be wondering what’s keeping me,” Joe piped in nervously, moving to follow quickly on his brother’s scurrying heels as the two beat a hasty retreat back towards the kitchen.

“Katherine, perhaps we should adjourn for today,” Mrs. Whitestone suddenly announced, rising to her feet.  “We can finish this up another day,” she said, as without further adieu she headed towards the door. 

Turning from her husband, Katherine pleaded, “Really, Mrs. Whitestone, there’s no need to….,” was all she got out before the woman disappeared out the door, followed quickly by several of the other ladies.  Sighing as she realized the futility of stemming the mass exodus, Katherine put on her most pleasant hostess facade and moved to the door to graciously see her guests on their way.

“Thank you for coming,” she said, nodding to several of the women, as she pulled the door open wider, her hand resting on the knob.  “I hope we can do this again…ah…,” she broke off, realizing the unintended meaning of her words.  Trying again, she said, “I mean, it’s been very interesting,” she nodded to the departing women, sighing as she suddenly realized that that too was open to an unintended interpretation.  “Thank you for coming,” she repeated the only safe statement as she smiled pleasantly, ushering the last of the women out the door.  Closing the door behind the last guest, she turned her furious eyes on her husband.  “Adam Cartwright!” she began as Adam reached a hand to scratch the back of his neck, an eye crinkled thoughtfully.

“So, was that meeting today?” he asked, a small smirk playing about his mouth.  “I’m sure you told me it was tomorrow.  Really, Katherine, you should be more careful about these things,” he rebuked her in mock sincerity, his mouth forming a silent tsk, tsk.

“ME?!?” Katherine shrieked.  “I should be more careful?  Adam Cartwright…!”

Letting out a loud sigh of mock disapproval, Adam interrupted her as he dropped his towel onto a chair, “Yes, it really doesn’t do any good to shock the good ladies of Viriginia City like that, Katherine.  Really, I’m surprised at you.”

“ME?!?” Katherine shrieked again.  “You…you…,” Katherine sputtered, gesticulating wildly at him as she floundered for an appropriate insult.  “You wipe that smirk off your face…you…you…,” she floundered again.

“And you really should do something about that stutter,” he smirked. 

“ARGHH!” Katherine exclaimed in frustration, throwing up her hands.  Turning away from the insufferable man, she began noisily cleaning up the room, piling the teacups onto the tray and muttering incoherently under her breath.  Something about men and husbands and shortened lifespans was all he could make out.

Bracing his arm at the back of a nearby upholstered chair, Adam leaned sideways towards the chair, crossing one foot over the other and raising a fist to rest on his hip as he watched his wife.  She didn’t know it and it probably wasn’t a good idea to tell her, but she looked very appealing when she was like this, he thought.  All flustered and riled up, inarticulate with her outrage.  No, it probably wasn’t a good idea to tell her that seeing her like this did something to him.  Made him think of things he wanted to do.  Wanted the both of them to do.  Together.  No, he probably shouldn’t tell her that.  Shouldn’t tell her that sometimes he purposely riled her just to watch her reaction, he thought, chuckling a little.

“And just what are you laughing about?” Katherine demanded, banging a teacup down as she whirled around to face him, her eyes darting fire.

“Oh nothing,” Adam answered evasively.  “Just wondering if the Virginia City ladies  have gotten over the shock of seeing three half-naked men yet,” he said, his eyes dancing merrily.

Biting her lip as she tried to suppress the sudden urge to laugh, Katherine turned away from husband, busying herself with the task of clean-up.  “Well,” she opined slowly, and air of deliberate casualness in her voice, “I guess if you three had to be half-naked, you at least picked the right half.”

“Katherine!” Adam exclaimed, jolting in shock and almost sliding off the chair. 

Laughing outright now, Katherine turned back to her husband.  “Did you see Mrs. Whitestone’s face?  I thought she was going to have an apoplectic fit!!” she cried in laughing merriment.

Adam grinned back at his wife, relieved to see that he was off the hook for his misdemeanour as he took in her laughing countenance and sparkling eyes.  Suddenly straightening away from the chair, his eyes darkened and his expression intensified as he slowly moved towards his wife.

Her husband advancing on her, Katherine’s laughter suddenly died on her lips as she recognized something about his manner.  “Adam?” she questioned hesitantly, trying to read him as he moved closer.  “Adam!” she exclaimed a second later, a sudden awareness of his intent overcoming her.  Stepping cautiously back away from her husband as he advanced on her, she stated firmly, “Now you just keep away from me.”

“Katherine!” Adam said, mildly perplexed.  Whatever did she mean telling him to keep away, he wondered, taking a step closer to her.

“Adam, I mean it!” Katherine’s voice went up a notch, along with her rising panic.  Damn the man.  Didn’t he know?  Didn’t he know the effect he had on her?  And here he was, shirtless, coming close to her pretending he didn’t know what he was doing to her.  And that look in his eye.  Oh, she knew that look.

“Really, Katherine,” Adam protested, advancing on her.

“Now you just stop right there!” Katherine exclaimed, raising her palm towards him and backing further away, stumbling around a piece of furniture.  “And get that look out of your eyes!” she added meaningfully.

“What look?” Adam asked innocently, arching his brow seductively.

“THAT look!” Katherine practically yelled.

“But, Katherine,” Adam protested in mock innocence, still advancing.  “YOU put that look there,” he informed her.

“I…I don’t care,” Katherine stammered.  “Just keep away from me,” she commanded, retreating until her back met the wall.

“But, Katherine,” Adam repeated, spreading his hands and raising his shoulders slightly as he professed his innocence. “I haven’t even touched you…” he said, pausing meaningfully before adding, “…yet.”

It was that yet part she was worried about.  Like he knew was going to be touching her.  Like she knew that he knew that he was going to be touching her.  Like they both knew exactly who was going to be touching whom and where.

“Katherine, what are you babbling about?” Adam interrupted her thoughts. Well, she’d thoughts they’d been her thoughts.  She must have spoken them aloud. 

“Adam, I’m not going to tell you again.  I’ve got things I have to do today and…not NOW!” she commanded, watching in alarm as her husband proceeded closer.

“Really Katherine,” Adam began, closing the distance between them until they were separated by mere inches, “whatever has gotten into you?  You’re as jittery as a pole cat.”

“Ah…ah…,” Katherine stammered, staring up into her husband’s eyes, finding her escape blocked by the wall behind her and the man in front of her.  Did he always have to look so damn good? she wondered.  Couldn’t there be at least something unappealing about him to help her resist his charm?  “I suppose you think you’re irresistible coming in here like this and looking like you do, don’t you?” she accused, as Adam arched his brow quizzically at her.  Her eyes slowly raking up and down his torso, she swallowed hard, noting the still-damp hair on his chest.  Meeting his eyes, she admitted begrudgingly, “Well, you are,” as Adam smiled a little and leaned in to nuzzle the side of her face as he brought his hands palms flat to the wall on either side of her. 

Really, what was he doing? Katherine wondered as she closed her eyes rapturously on a sigh and leaned her head back against the wall as his whiskered face grazed her tender skin.  She had the sudden thought that it was a good thing the wall was behind her holding her up since her knees didn’t seem to want to do their job properly anymore.  How quickly he’d done it.  With just the simple touch of his face to hers he’d turned her into a mass of quivering flesh.  It wasn’t supposed to be like this, was it?  They were an old married couple, after all.  She was a mother with two children for heaven’s sake.

“Katherine, I know we have two children,” Adam said in mild surprise, brushing his lips across her temple. 

Damn, Katherine cursed herself mentally.  She’d spoken her thoughts aloud again.  What this man could do to her.  She couldn’t even keep her thoughts in her head. 

Leaning closer to his wife, Adam pressed his body to hers.  “Or maybe you want me to remind you how we got those two children?” he teased, as he trailed kisses from her temple to her earlobe to nibble on the tender flesh there.

A tremor coursing through her at his words and actions, Katherine suddenly felt overcome by a feeling of helplessness, of powerlessness.  Turning her face away from him, she butted her head to his chest as she pleaded, “Adam, don’t,” her voice suddenly small and vulnerable.

“Hey!” Adam softy exclaimed, stiffening in surprise at his wife’s reaction to his playful teasing.  Slipping one hand around her waist, he pushed away from the wall with the other, straightening as he pulled her along with him.   Looking down at his wife as she hid herself in his chest, he delivered a gentle squeeze, prompting in a soft and tender voice, “Hey, what’s all this?” as Katherine stood mutely in his embrace, head bowed, not trusting herself to speak, not knowing what to say.  Puzzled by the strange development, Adam drew a finger under his wife’s chin, raising her face to his.  Meeting her eyes, he saw the shiny glaze of tears floating on their surface.  “Katherine!” he exclaimed, even more puzzled and surprised.  Whatever was the matter? he wondered.  He’d only meant to tease her, not bring her to tears.

How could she tell him? Katherine wondered.  Tell him that this effect he had on her scared her sometimes?  That it made her vulnerable, too vulnerable, to know that he held her life, her breath, her being, in his hand to do with as he pleased.  “Adam, I…,” she faltered as she shook her head, not finding the words to express her feelings as she dropped her head to his chest again. 

Berating himself, feeling guilty and thinking he’d caused her unnecessary distress, Adam was quick to reassure her as he wrapped both arms about her.  “Katherine, don’t worry, I won’t…I won’t….,” he stopped.  Starting over, he tried to explain.  “I just want to hold you.  That’s all.  We don’t have to…” he stopped again. “I just want to be close to you for a little while,” he whispered the plea tenderly before confessing his own vulnerability.  “I need to be close to you.”

Tilting her head up, Katherine met her husband’s eyes, seeing something like her own vulnerability mirrored back at her.  So she wasn’t alone.  It wasn’t just her.  Finally giving up trying to find the words, she merely nodded her consent to him.

At her almost imperceptible nod, Adam reached his arms further around her, drawing her tightly to him as Katherine reached her arms around him and turned her face sideways, her ear pressed close to his heart as she listened to its rythmic beat.

And there they stood for several long moments in the great room of their home, their bodies pressed close together, not moving, not speaking, not kissing, only touching, and it suddenly occurred to Katherine that she’d never had him so close.
Chapter 3
*********

Riding back to the Ponderosa, both of them now properly shirted, Little Joe suddenly pulled up his horse to a stop, a question on his mind.

“Hey, Hoss?  Do you think we should tell Jenny and Annie about what happened back there?” he asked when his brother had stopped his horse beside  him.

“You mean you don’t know, Joe?” Hoss questioned him.

“Well,” Joe hesitated, tilting his head thoughtfully.  “No, I guess I don’t,” he finally admitted.  Maybe it would be best just to forget it even happened.  For one, they’d be opening themselves up to unnecessary ridicule and two, Jenny and Annie might even be upset with them for ruining Katherine’s meeting.  It hadn’t taken the three women very long to form a strong alliance together and he had a deep suspicion about who’s side Jenny would be on in this matter.

“Look, Joe,” Hoss explained.  “It’s fer dang sure Katherine will be tellin’ Annie and Jenny all about it.  And even if she don’t, they’ll get an earful the next time they go inta town.  No, they’s gonna hear about it one way or the other and trust me, it’ll be best if they hear it from us first,” Hoss stated emphatically.

Sighing as he acknowledged his brother’s wisdom, Joe replied, “Alright, Hoss,” as he nudged his horse forward.

Smiling, Hoss nudged his horse forward as well, thinking that he and Little Joe weren’t doing too badly at this marriage thing, even if it did sometimes take a little trial and error to get things right.

Entering the front door of the Ponderosa ranch house a short while late, his brother at his side, Hoss called out, “Annie!” looking about the empty room in puzzlement.  “Annie!” he called again.  Getting no answer to his shout, he said, “Well, I guess she ain’t here.”

“Well, where do you suppose they went to?” Joe asked, hitching his thumbs in the back of his belt as he looked about the room, wondering about his own wife’s whereabouts since Jenny had come to spend the afternoon with Annie.

“I dunno….HEY!” Hoss suddenly exclaimed in delight, clapping his hands together at the sight of 2 1/2 year-old Buck running into the room from the kitchen, followed closely by Hop Sing.  “Hey!  How’s my boy?” Hoss greeted his son, tugging his pants legs at his thighs before squatting down and reaching his arms out to the child.  Laughing delightedly, Buck raced to his father’s arms to be scooped up in Hoss’s embrace.  Jostling his son up and down in his arms a few times as he stood, the father and son expressed their joy with each other’s company with mutual laughter.  Noticing some incriminating evidence, Hoss suddenly reached out a finger to brush a powdery white substance from his son’s cheek.  “Hey, what this?” he asked suspiciously, drawing his finger to his mouth for a taste.  “Hey!” he exclaimed again, eyeing his son accusingly in mock seriousness, “is that sugar donuts I taste?”  At the child’s solemn nod, Hoss exclaimed, “What!” and turned to Hop Sing, not far away.  “Hop Sing, you been feeding Buck those sugar donuts you promised you’d make fer ME?” he accused, a secret smile on his face.

“Buck a good boy,” Hop Sing defended himself.  “Hop Sing give little boy donuts because he so good.  Miz Cartwright say keep good eye on little Buck while she and other Miz Cartwright go down to creek,” Hop Sing informed Hoss and Joe of their wives’ whereabouts.

Exchanging a glance with Joe at this piece of information, Hoss shrugged lightly before turning back to Buck.  “Now, Buck, you didn’t eat ALL them donuts, did ya?  Did ya save some fer me?” he asked, an exaggerated note of hope in his voice.

As the child nodded solemnly, he raised his hand, making the number one with his finger.

“WHAT?” Hoss shrieked in mock outrage.  “You mean you only saved ONE fer me?” as Buck shrieked in laughter, delighted to be the cause of his father’s comical outrage.

“Hop Sing got lots more donuts,” Hop Sing corrected the child’s accounting.  “Plenty more in kitchen,” he announced, ducking his head and turning back to that very room.

“Hey, I think I’ll see if I can grab one or two,” Joe whispered conspiratorially, nudging his elbow into Hoss’s arm before moving to follow the Chinese man, all this talk of donuts making him hungry.

“Hey, bring me a couple too, will ya Joe?” Hoss called out to his brother’s back, turning back to his son in his arms when his brother had disappeared from the room.  “You!” he chastised in mock seriousness.  “Only one donut!” he hmpffed as Buck giggled at his own cleverness.  “I’ll ‘only one donut’ you!” Hoss threatened, reaching a hand to tickle Buck’s side.

As Buck squealed merrily and tried to evade his father’s hand, the front door suddenly burst open and Annie entered the room, heading for the staircase, her body a picture of outraged indignation. 

“Annie!” Hoss exclaimed at his wife’s appearance.  She was soaked from head to toe, her hair and dress plastered to her body. 

Following close on her heels, Jenny entered the room, her person in much the same state as Annie’s.  Turning back to her sister-in-law as she came into the room, Annie exclaimed in outrage, “That’s the last time I listen to you, Jenny Cartwright!”

“I told you it wasn’t my fault!” Jenny shot back.  “How was I supposed to know those rocks would be so slippery!”

“Well, don’t just stand there!” Annie shouted.  “You’re dripping water all over the floor!”

“Well, SO ARE YOU!!” Jenny shouted, as the two women faced each other angrily.  Just then, Joe came into the room, holding one donut in his mouth and another two in each hand.  Coming to a sudden halt at the sight before him, his eyes widened in surprise.

Turning to see her husband nearby, Jenny commanded, “Come on, Joe!  We’re leaving right now!” and with that, she turned and stormed from the house.

Moving over to his brother, Joe reached a hand out, giving two of the donuts to him and freeing up a hand to remove the donut from his mouth.  Thinking now was not a good idea to ask what was going on, seeing that Annie was fuming angrily only a few feet away, Joe said nervously, “Well, I’ll see ya, Hoss.”

“Ah, see ya, Joe,” Hoss hemmed back, watching as his brother left the house.

Turning to his wife, Hoss hesitantly asked, “So, Annie, what happened?” his eyes raking over her appearance, still not quite believing what he was seeing.

“That Jenny and her harebrained schemes!  Crossing the creek over the rocks!” Annie fumed in derision, thinking of Jenny’s idea to pick the strange little flowers that grew on the far side of the creek.  It’d be easy, she said.  All they had to do to get across was make there way over the smooth-topped rocks raised above water level.  HAH! Annie thought.  If that wasn’t the mother of all bad ideas!  And the proof was in her uncomfortably soaking wet body.  As Buck leaned over, reaching his arms out to his mother from his place in Hoss’s arms, Annie shook her head to his unspoken request, her voice softening as she apologized to the child, “No, Buck, Mama can’t hold ya right now.  She’s all wet.”

“You mean….you mean Jenny talked ya into…into…,” Hoss waved his donut-wielding hand at his wife’s sodden clothes as Buck settled back in his arms.  At Annie’s nod of embarrassed admission, Hoss let out a loud guffaw.  “But Annie,” he protested, “why would you let her talk ya inta doing something like that?” wondering at Jenny’s ability to persuade his normally practical wife into participating in such an endeavour.

“I dunno, Hoss,” Annie confessed, puzzled herself.  “She…she just kinda makes it sound so inviting,” she acknowledged on a sigh, as Hoss let out an even louder guffaw.

“Say no more, Annie,” he said knowingly, raising his hand and the donuts to forestall further comment, something about this whole episode ringing eerily familiar.  “I understand completely!!”

Grimacing with displeasure, Annie turned, picking her skirts carefully away from her body as she uncomfortably made her way up the stairs.
Chapter 4
**********

Waiting for his wife and daughters while they dressed for the picnic the Cartwright family was holding to celebrate Joe and Jenny’s second wedding anniversary, Adam Cartwright leaned backwards against the back of the settee and crossed his arms in front of him.  If they didn’t hurry up, they’d be late and if it was one thing Adam prided himself on it was his reliability, although that reliability was sometimes compromised when you figured a wife and two children into the equation. 

Suddenly spotting a flurry of motion at the top of the stairs, Adam straightened away from the settee and watched as his wife, young 1-year-old Fallon in her arms, prepared to descend, 4-year-old Beth in front of her.  Inhaling a little at the picture before him, Adam felt the corners of his mouth tugging into a smile.  They were clothed in identical dresses, the same white frilly fabric with small green threads running through it, his daughters’ dresses merely shorter frillier versions of Katherine’s longer gown.  Her younger daughter propped on her hip with one arm, Katherine raised the hem of her dress with the other to make her way down the stairs, nudging her older daughter down before her.  Just a wee bit taller than the staircase railing, the child had to reach a hand up to rest on the railing as she made her way slowly down, a small stuffed doll held tightly in the crook of her other arm, as she plunked from one step to the next, her short legs gamely working the oversize steps.  Finally reaching the bottom, Katherine looked at her husband to remark, “I hope we weren’t too long, Adam.”

“No, no, not at all,” he contradicted his earlier thoughts, moving closer as his eyes swept over the trio.  “My, what lovely ladies you all are!” he complimented playfully as Katherine smiled and Beth giggled with pleasure at his words.  His words of praise having no effect on Fallon, he reached out, taking her hand in his and giving it a little tug.  “And how about you, little one?” he asked the flame-haired child, still propped on her mother’s hip.  Looking over, Fallon’s face lit up in recognition as she gurgled happily, revealing a toothy smile.  Pleased at her reaction, Adam grinned back before turning his attention to his other daughter, standing at her mother’s side.  “And you!” he exclaimed, reaching down to hoist the dark-haired child into his arms.  “You look so good I could eat you up!” he declared, pretending to do just that, as he raised her hand in his to take a pretend bite from her palm.  Laughing at her father’s antics, Beth squealed, “No!  Don’t eat me!”

“But I’m hungry,” Adam whined pitifully.  “You’re not going to make me wait until the picnic, are you?”

“Yes!” Beth squealed in delighted authority.

“Oh, alright,” Adam sighed in mock resignation.  His daughter propped to one side, Adam turned to look at his wife.  “And you!” he exclaimed, as Katherine raised a brow in question at him.  “You look so good I could…I could….,” he trailed off, suddenly leaning in to deliver a kiss to his surprised wife’s lips. 

“Adam, the girls!” Katherine exclaimed when he pulled back, wondering at his uninhibited action in front of them.

“Katherine, they’ve seen me kiss their mother before,” Adam noted dryly, suppressing an amused smile.  Moving to turn towards the door, he thought better of it, turning back to place a second kiss on his wife’s now-doubly-surprised lips.

“Adam!” Katherine exclaimed when he’d once again pulled back. 

“Come along, Katherine,” he smirked, turning away towards the door, his eldest daughter in his arms.  “We’ll be late if you keep kissing me like this.”

“What?” Katherine shrieked at his impudence, lifting a foot to take a swipe at the back of his retreating legs.

“Katherine, the girls!” Adam turned to exclaim in mock outrage, tsk-tsking his wife’s bad example in front of their impressionable children.  Moving to the door with Beth in his arms, he opened it, turning to wait to usher his wife and youngest daughter through.  Passing by her husband, Katherine turned to meet his eyes, exchanging looks of amusement and…and…something else, before she headed out the door.  A small smile playing about his mouth, Adam reached for his hat, settling it onto his head rakishly low at the front and lifted his chin to peer up from under the brim to follow his wife outside, pulling the door closed behind him. 
Chapter 5
*********

“Hoss, maybe yer Pa would like some more fried chicken,” Annie indirectly asked her father-in-law if he’d like more food as Ben sighed.  You know, he thought, maybe one of these days one of his daughters-in-law might just actually call him Pa directly.  Even ‘Ben’ would be alright, he sighed.  But they’d all devised ways to avoid the awkward ‘how to address the father-in-law’ issue, and he’d given up coaxing them to call him Pa a long time ago.  For Annie, it was always ‘yer Pa’ or ‘yer Grampa’, spoken to Hoss or Buck but intended for him.  Katherine, well, she usually just avoided the issue altogether.  And then there was Jenny.  She’d taken to calling him ‘sir’, just like Joe did when he was in trouble. 

“No thanks, Annie,” Ben answered her indirect question.  “Really, I couldn’t eat another bite,” he stated, a hand to his full belly as he sat on the outstretched picnic blanket.

Retrieving a ball from inside the picnic basket, Annie turned, giving it to her nearby son, “Buck, why don’t you ask yer Grampa to play with you?” she coaxed the child as Ben sighed again.  A ‘yer pa’ and a ‘yer Grampa’ and the picnic had barely begun.  As Buck scrambled over to him on his knees, a hopeful expression on his face, Ben changed his expression to one of delight.

“Come on, young man, let’s show your Ma and Pa how it’s done,” he teased, using Annie’s indirect salutation back at her.  Reaching for Buck’s hand, they both rose to their feet, heading off a ways to play ball as Annie and Hoss watched, proud and pleased expressions on their faces.

Out by the water, Jenny came up to her husband in a quiet spot away from the others at the picnic.  A small wrapped box in her hands, she shyly offered it to him, “Here Joe, I have a present for you.”

“Jenny!” Joe exclaimed in pleased surprise, taking the box enthusiastically and unwrapping it.  He’d already given her her anniversary gift a week ago, too impatient to wait once he’d had it in his possession, too excited at finding a pair of sapphire earrings the exact same peculiar blue-violet colour as his wife’s eyes to wait long to give them to her.  Opening the lid of the gift box, Joe stared down at the contents, his surprise manifested by his silent response.

“Do you like it, Joe?” Jenny prompted nervously at her husband’s silence.

“It’s…it’s a necklace,” Joe stated, unable to hid his obvious surprise at his wife’s gift.

“It’s not a necklace, Joe,” Jenny was quick to explain.  “It’s a chain with a medallion.  See, the medallion has two horses on the front,” she drew his attention to that fact, reaching over to touch the silver medallion the size of a large coin as it lay on the velvet interior of the box.

“You….you want me to wear a necklace?” Joe repeated the word, still astonished by the gift as he looked from the box in his hand over to his wife, his astonishment clearly written on his face.

“It’s not a necklace, Joe,” Jenny repeated.  “It’s a chain with a meda….,”

“But what would people think if they saw me wearing a necklace?” Joe interrupted her with his question, as he once again stared down at the box in his hands.

“People won’t know you’re wearing it, Joe,” Jenny said.  “The chain is long and you’d wear it inside your shirt.  Besides, I told you, it’s not a necklace.” Watching her husband as he continued shaking his head as he stared down at the box in his hand, Jenny huffed, “Well, alright, Joe, just forget it then.”  Turning suddenly she stomped away.

Looking up from his preoccupation with his gift to see his wife moving angrily away, Joe moved to follow her.  “Jenny…Jenny, wait!” he called.

“Leave me alone Joe!” Jenny called angrily over her shoulder, continuing briskly to a nearby tree.  Bending over, her motions quick and jerky with her anger, she reached between her legs near her feet to pull the material at the back of her dress up and over her skirt at the front, tucking the hem into her waistband at the front.  Her skirt now converted into something vaguely resembling pants, she turned, reaching out to the nearby branch to hoist herself up into the tree.

“Jenny, what are you doing?” Joe demanded, coming up to the tree as he watched his wife begin her ascent.

“Getting away from you!” Jenny replied huffily.

“Jenny,” Joe’s tone was authoritarian.  “Jenny, come down from there!”

“Just leave me alone, Joe!” Jenny shouted down to her husband, continuing to climb.

“Jenny, I’m sorry about what I said about the neck…medallion.  I’m sorry, Jenny,” Joe apologized, changing his tactic.  “Jenny!” Joe called up to his wife as his efforts were met with stony silence.  His mouth thinning unhappily, Joe inhaled deeply, ready to begin again when he suddenly spotted Katherine and Adam approaching him.  Quickly assuming an air of casualness, Joe hid the gift box behind him with one hand and leaned against the tree as he pretended to study the leaf on a nearby branch.

“Joe, what are you doing over here?” Katherine asked.  “And where’s Jenny?” she wondered, peering curiously around her.

“Hmm?  Jenny?” Joe tore his gaze from the leaf as one pulled from deep concentration by an interruption.  Shrugging nonchalantly, he replied casually, “Oh, I’m not really sure where she is right now.”

“Why don’t you look up in the tree, Joe?” Adam drawled the question dryly from beside his wife.  “I think you’ll find her there,” he smirked as Katherine looked upwards at this information and Joe looked stricken at the discovery of his ruse.

“JENNY!” Katherine exclaimed in alarm.  “Jenny, what are you doing in that tree?” she squeaked in astonished surprise only to be surprised again when Adam grabbed her by the hand and began to pull her away.

“Come along, Katherine,” he directed on a sigh, leading his wife away.

“But…but…,” Katherine sputtered, extending her other arm fully to point back at the tree as she glanced over her shoulder and resisted her husband’s tugs.

“I know, dear,” Adam soothed in mock sincerity at his wife’s speechlessness.  “Don’t worry, Joe will take care of it,” he drawled knowingly, continuing to pull his wife along behind him.

His brother and his wife out of sight, Joe turned back to look up into the tree.  “Jenny, will you please come down!” he bellowed up, his hands on his hips.

“Joe, I told you to just leave me alone!” Jenny shouted back.

Expelling his breath, Joe mumbled under his breath, something about women and wives and shortened lifespans.  Thrusting the gift box inside his shirt he reached up, hoisting himself into the tree and climbed up after his wife, no small feat since he had a fear of heights.  But this wasn’t the first time he’d followed his wife up a tree and it probably wouldn’t be the last, he sighed.  Coming up level to his wife, he perched on the branch next to her as she averted her face from him.

“Jenny, I’m sorry about the gift.  I was just….surprised, is all,” he apologized. 

His apology met with silence, Joe reached over to turn his wife’s face to his, inhaling at what he saw.  “Jenny, are you crying?” he asked, astonished and worried at the same time.

“No,” Jenny was swift with the denial as she turned her face back away, unable to hide a sniffle or two.

Desperate now to make amends, Joe reached into his shirt, retrieving the gift box.  “Jenny, I’ll wear the chain.  Really,” he promised.

Shaking her head forlornly, Jenny answered, “No, Joe.  You don’t have to wear it.  I should have gotten you the rifle or the saddle like you wanted.  I just thought…” she stopped, shrugging lightly.  “I’m sorry, Joe,” she apologized, her voice catching with her tears as she ran the back of her sleeve under each eye.  “I’ll take it back and….,”

“No, Jenny,” Joe interrupted.  “I want to keep it.  I want to wear it.  Really I do,” he said, pulling the chain from the box and lifting it over his head.

Peeking over at her husband as he pulled the chain over his head, Jenny asked hesitantly, “Really?  Really, Joe?  You don’t mind?” a note of hope in her voice.

“Mind?” Joe looked up to ask in exaggerated astonishment.  “Jenny, I’ll never take it off,” he vowed as Jenny giggled at his outrageous proclamation.

“Joe, you don’t have to wear it ALL the time!  Just sometimes would be alright,” she told him shyly, a small tremulous smile touching her lips as her face softened with pleasure.

“You know, it’s really nice, Jenny,” he said, looking down to lift the medallion for a better look.  “It’s really nice,” he repeated, surprised to find he really meant it as he admired the depiction of the two horses on the front.

“Look at the back, Joe,” Jenny said, drying the last of her tears with her sleeve and turning to face him as following her instructions Joe turned the medallion over.

“Hey, you had it engraved,” he observed, raising the medallion closer to his face to read the words, slowly reading the small print aloud.
Joe
Have you ever been over a rainbow?
Or walked through fields of gold?
Have you ever soared with eagles?
Or touched a star in heaven?
I have
You’ve taken me there

I love you
Jenny
Swallowing hard as he finished reading, Joe looked up at his wife, blinking rapidly as he tried to keep a rein on his emotions.  “Jenny, that was…Jenny, this is the best present I’ve ever gotten.”

“Joe!” Jenny exclaimed in disbelief before seeing the truth of his words in his eyes.  “Really?” she asked, just to be sure, a note of hope in her voice.

“Really, Jenny,” Joe nodded.  “Thank you, Jenny,” he whispered.

“You’re welcome, Joe,” Jenny replied, pleasure washing over her, as they stared happily at each other a moment or two in silence.  A small mischievous grin suddenly appearing on his face, Joe said, “Jenny, there’s just one more thing and then everything would be perfect.”

“Perfect?” Jenny asked, raising a brow.  “What’s that, Joe?” 

Grinning outright now, Joe begged, “Could we get out of this damn tree?”

Laughing out loud, Jenny grinned back, nodding her head, “Okay, Joe,” before the two descended back down to the ground.  Safely on the ground, Joe immediately reached for his wife, his hands on the sides of her waist as he pulled her to him.  Lowering his head for a kiss, he pressed her spine back as Jenny rested her arms atop of his, her hands just below his shoulders as his arms went around her, tightening in behind her waist.  The impulsive kiss over a moment or two later, Joe kept her in his arms and touched his forehead to hers, resting it there.  “There,” he whispered, his breath caressing her face, before he softly breathed another word to her.

“Perfect.”

Chapter 6
*********

Annie Cartwright came out the front door of the Ponderosa ranch house almost a month later with a smile on her face.  Already hearing the jovial banter of her husband and his younger brother, she moved to join them out in the courtyard.  Coming closer, Annie came to her husband’s side as he stood on the ground teasing his brother Little Joe as he sat up on his horse.

“Now, Joe, if you win you remember you promised me half of the take!” Hoss was saying as he winked at Jenny, sitting astride her horse Lightening next to her husband.

“No way, brother!” Joe refuted on a laugh.  “If I win, Jenny gets half my take.  And if she wins, I get half of hers!” Joe set the record straight.

“Well, it’s fer dang sure one of you’ll win!” Hoss laughed, thinking he couldn’t remember the last race when either Joe or Jenny hadn’t won. Yup, between the two of them they pretty much had a monopoly on the horse races for quite a few miles around.

“What do you mean ‘if’ I win, Joe?” Jenny piped in, turning to look at her husband.  “There’s no ‘if’ about it,” she boldly taunted.

“What?” Joe challenged his wife’s bravado, as he turned to look at her.  “Care to make a wager on that?”

Laughing out loud, Jenny jutted her face towards him, grinding her head as she  taunted, “Are you sure you can afford it?”

“Why you…!” Joe cursed laughingly, reaching over to tickle the side of her waist as Jenny squealed and jerked away.

Watching the scene with a smile on her face, Annie’s gaze floated from Joe over to her sister-in-law.  Suddenly Annie let out an involuntary sharp exclamation, “Jenny!”

Their laughter and horseplay ceasing, Joe and Jenny turned simultaneously to peer down at Annie who stood on the ground looking up at Jenny with a worried expression.  “Yes, Annie?” Jenny asked, a mildly perplexed look on her face.

“Jenny…Jenny….,” Annie tried to think fast.  “Jenny, would you come into the house fer a minute?  I have something I want to show you.”

“But Annie,” Jenny protested.  “We’re off to the race in Virginia City and we’ll be late if….,”

“It’ll jist take a minute, Jenny,” Annie insisted, eyeing her sister-in-law with concern.

Exchanging a look of confusion with Joe, Jenny shrugged slightly, “Well, alright Annie, if you want,” as she moved to dismount her horse.  Handing the reins to her husband, she turned to follow Annie into the house, as Joe and Hoss stared after the women.

Inside the ranch house, Jenny turned her inquiring eyes on Annie.  “Well?” she asked, wondering what her sister-in-law wanted to show her that was so important it couldn’t wait till later.

“Ah…ah…,” Annie faltered.  “Up in my bedroom,” she waved her hand vaguely to the staircase, thinking to buy herself a little time, as Jenny raised a brow at her before heading towards the stairs.

Following Jenny up the stairs, Annie wondered if her suspicion was right.  Surely Jenny herself would know, wouldn’t she?

Entering the bedroom, Jenny paused just inside the door to turn to Annie with a questioning look on her face. 

Seeing the look, Annie pointed to the trunk at the foot of the bed.  “There.  In the trunk,” she directed.  “I…I’m working on a quilt I want you to see,” she adlibbed, as Jenny moved to the trunk, crouching down to raise the lid. 

Reaching in, Jenny ran her hand over the almost finished log-cabin patterned quilt, folded neatly inside. “Oh, Annie, it’s lovely,” she complimented sincerely, admiring her sister-in-law’s handiwork but still a little puzzled at Annie’s insistence she come take a look.  Annie usually wasn’t one for showing off anything she did.

Annie eyed her sister-in-law as she continued to admire the quilt before her.  Coming closer towards her, she offered casually, “Say, uh, Jenny….you’ve, uh…you’ve filled out a mite since I last seen ya.”

Her attention still focussed on the quilt as she continued to run her hand the material, Jenny conceded on a chuckle, “Yeah, I have.  Joe says it’s because my cooking’s getting better.”

What? Annie thought.  So Joe’s noticed it too?  You mean both of them noticed and neither one thought…?

“Jenny, are you sure that’s all it is?” Annie asked pointedly as Jenny turned to look at her, puzzled by Annie’s tone.

“What do you mean, Annie?” she asked.

“Well, Jenny,” Annie hesitated only briefly before her forthright nature took over.  “Jenny, it looks ter me like yer acarryin’,” she announced.

Inhaling sharply at her sister-in-law’s observation, Jenny shook her head in denial.  She’d given up hoping a long time ago.  “No, that’s not possible,” she said.

“Not possible?” Annie echoed slowly, looking sideways at Jenny.  “You mean you and Joe ain’t been…?”

“Annie!” Jenny exclaimed, interrupting her sister-in-law as a fierce blush came to her face.  “No, it’s not possible because…because I’m barren,” Jenny informed her, dropping her eyes.

“Barren?” Annie repeated in confusion.  “Who told you that?” she demanded.

“No one told me,” Jenny admitted, still looking down.  “It’s just…well, it’s been two years.”

Disregarding this nonsense, Annie got down to business.  “Jenny, when was your last woman’s time?” she probed.

Looking up, Jenny tilted her head thoughtfully and squinted as she tried to remember, the event so far back in time as to escape her memory.  Letting out a snort of disapproval, her answer received by Jenny’s silent reflection, Annie reached for the trunk lid, dropping it closed as Jenny jerked her hands out of the way.  Reaching down, Annie pulled Jenny up and over to sit on the bed. 

“Look, Jenny,” she ordered, sitting next to her and staring intently at her, “until you find out from Doc Martin fer sure one way or the other, you’d best not be doing any racing.”

“But…but…,” Jenny stammered, trying desperately to stem the tide of hope that was rising inside her.  It couldn’t be possible, could it?  How could a baby be on the way now?  Now, after two long years?  But she had been feeling kind of strange lately.  All those bouts of queasiness she’d been trying to ignore.  “Annie, do you really think….?” she dreamily breathed the question, staring off into space, her eyes glowing with hope.  “Do you really think….?” she repeated, almost like she couldn’t even believe her own question.

A small tender smile touched Annie’s lips.  Reaching out she squeezed Jenny’s arm, nodding gently as she spoke, “I really think.”  As Jenny turned to meet her eyes, Annie reverted to practicalities as she commanded, “So they’ll be no more racing.”

Suddenly alarmed by her predicament, Jenny stammered, “But…but what’ll I tell Joe?”  He’d be expecting her to ride in the race and she couldn’t tell him why she couldn’t.  Not yet.  Not till she knew for sure.

Understanding Jenny’s unspoken worry, Annie patted her sister-in-law’s hand.  “Now, don’t you worry none about that.  You jist let me take care of that.  I’ll think up something to tell him,” she winked reassuringly.  “And the day after tomorrow, when Joe leaves to work on that timber contract, you and me will go inta town and pay Doc Martin a visit.  Okay?” she asked, waiting for Jenny’s nod.  Getting up Annie pushed her sister-in-law back against the pillows.  “Now you jist rest a spell, y’hear me?” she ordered.

Settling back against the pillows, Jenny brought her hand up to tuck under her head as she lay on her back on the bed.  “Yes, Annie,” she acquiesced meekly watching as Annie turned and left the room, pulling the door closed quietly behind her.

Alone in the room, Jenny brought her other hand to rest over her belly as she stared reflectively up at the ceiling.  A baby.  Her very own baby.  Her and Joe’s.  Closing her eyes, she let the hope wash over her till, overwhelmed, she turned her face into the crook of her elbow.

And cried.

Chapter 7
*********

Hearing the horse’s whinny from inside her small white-frame house the next morning, Jenny looked up from her task folding the blanket with a pleased smile on her face.  It must be Joe, she thought, back early from mending the south pasture fence with his brothers.  Laying the blanket across the foot of the bed, she eagerly headed out the bedroom and across the front room to the front door.  Hearing the booted step on the porch, she flung the door wide, a ready smile and greeting on her lips.

“Why Joe! What are you….,” Jenny stopped at the sight of the man before her, the smile and welcome wiped from her face as she froze in stunned surprise.

“Well now, Jenny girl, you seem surprised to see me,” the man on the doorstep drawled.

“Pa…Pa, what are you doing here?” Jenny stammered, stunned by the sight of her stepfather.  It had been two years since she’d seen him, since shortly before she’d married Joe.  He’d left town after the Cartwrights, all of them, had given him jewelry and money to go away.

“Why, Jenny, is that any way to greet yer Pa?” Earl Talbot drawled sarcastically, pushing his way past her into the room.  Looking about the room, he let a derogatory whistle.  “Is this the best those Cartwrights could do fer ya, Jenny?” he denigrated the small, cozy room.  “Why this place ain’t nothing like that other’n,” he remarked, referring to the splendour of the Ponderosa ranch house.

“Joe and I like this place,” Jenny immediately defended her home, her chin going up just a tad.  “What is it you want, Pa?” Jenny changed the subject.

His eyes still sweeping the room, Earl Talbot turned back to eye his stepdaughter disapprovingly.  “And I don’t see no young’uns tugging on yer skirts,” he observed cruelly.  “Looks like maybe those Cartwrights didn’t git no bargain in you, don’t it?” he taunted.

Her body tightening in silent outrage, Jenny repeated, “What is it you want, Pa?”

“What do you think I want?” Earl Talbot snapped back angrily.  “You living with them rich Cartwrights and yer own Pa ain’t got two dimes ter rub together.”

“Two dimes….,” Jenny repeated, expelling her breath in shock.  “But what about…what about….?” she asked, remembering the money the Cartwrights had given him.  And the expensive jewelry.  Surely all of that must have been worth a lot.

“Now I ain’t saying they weren’t generous the first time, Jenny,” Earl Talbot conceded.  “But five thousand dollars don’t last forever,” he stated flatly.

“Five thousand!” Jenny exclaimed, staggered at the information.  She’d had no idea.  No idea that all the money and jewelry had come to so much.  Why there must have been thousands of dollars in those saddle bags her father-in-law had handed over.  Handed over like they were nothing to him at all.

“So it looks like I’ll be needing a little more money, Jenny, just to tide me over like,” Earl Talbot explained.

“But Pa!” Jenny wailed.  “I don’t have that kind of money!” 

“What do you mean?” Earl Talbot countered angrily.  “Yer married to a Cartwright!” he shouted.

“But…but….,” Jenny shook her head.  “But Pa, I can’t ask him for that kind of money,” she pleaded.  Sure, her and Joe had a bank account but she’d never withdrawn more than twenty dollars at a time, and even then she’d always given Joe an accounting of the depleted funds.  Not that he’d ever asked her to but she wanted to run her household efficiently, proud of her ability to manage their money.

“What do you mean you can’t ask him?” Earl Talbot repeated, his face darkening with red fury.  “I’m yer Pa.  You owe me!”

“No,” Jenny shook her head, a sudden decision made.  No more.  This man was not a father to her, had never been one.  She would not ask Joe or his family to support him any more.  They’d paid too much already.  “No, I won’t ask them,” she repeated firmly, refusing his request, her chin raised in authoritative denial.

Infuriated now at the sight of the little slip of a girl standing up to him, her head shaking in negative response, Earl Talbot lashed out, grabbing her by the arms, shaking her violently, his hands digging painfully into the tender flesh of her arms.  “And I say you will!” he yelled angrily, specks of spit clinging to the corners of his mouth.

Facing the fury of her stepfather, Jenny stalwartly continued to shake her head ‘no’, commanding as she did so, “Let me go!” but eyeing him warily, something in his manner niggling at the back of her brain in warning.

“What?!” Earl Talbot boomed, unbelieving at her continued refusal.  Did she think she was better than him, he wondered, suddenly enraged at the notion.  Why the little fool.  She was no better than alley trash, never had been, never would be.

Trying to pull out of her stepfather’s grasp, Jenny was unprepared for what happened next.  It had been more than two years since anyone had raised their hand in anger to her, had raised a hand to her at all.  Maybe she’d forgotten what it was like.  Maybe being with the Cartwrights had lulled her into a sense of safety, where kindness and respect were the order of the day.  So when her stepfather suddenly reached out, backhanding her across her face so forcefully that she flew backwards, stumbling past a piece of furniture as she fell to the floor, her back banging painfully against the edge of a low table, she was more stunned than anything else. 

“Now you git me that money, y’hear, girl?  Five thousand,” Earl Talbot ordered the instructions, waging his finger down at her as Jenny stared back up at him from the ground, frozen and speechless with shock.  “And don’t take too long about it!  I’ll be back!” he threatened warningly, turning and stomping from the room, the door open behind him.

Not moving from her place on the floor, Jenny listened to his retreating steps, the brief silence as he mounted his horse, the quick ‘giddup’ to the animal and finally the pounding hooves of his departure.  Several more moments passed before she began to tremble violently, the unpleasant events of the past moments only now beginning to register.  Slowly she gained her feet, moving to right the room, closing the door and re-adjusting the displaced furniture, thinking she was doing a good job of remaining calm and composed.  It wasn’t until she looked down and saw her hand shaking uncontrollably that she fell apart, clamping her hand over her mouth in horror as she sank into a nearby wingchair, burying her head on the side as silent sobs wracked her body.
Chapter 8
**********

“Joe, can I go with you?” Jenny tentatively asked her husband that night as he bundled his gear in preparation to leave in the morning to go work on the timber contract.  It wasn’t often Joe was the Cartwright in charge of a job like this, usually it was his father or one of his brothers and Joe was looking forward to the chance to prove his abilities.  Coming up behind him, Jenny asked him her question.  She hadn’t told him anything that had happened that day, hadn’t told him of her father’s visit or his demand for money, not wanting to burden him now when his mind was on the job ahead.

“Jenny?” Joe turned from his task to peer back at his wife in surprise. 

“Can I, Joe?” Jenny repeated, her hands clasped together.  “I’m good on the trail, you know that.  And I won’t get in the way, I promise,” she added persuasively.

“Jenny,” Joe said, getting up from his place and coming to her, reaching out to touch her arms.  “Jenny, we’ve already talked about this.  I don’t want to be away from you anymore than you want to be away from me.  But I’ve got a job to do.  Besides, you said you were looking forward to spending time with Annie.”

“I…I know, Joe, it’s just….,” Jenny faltered, looking down.  “I promise not to be any trouble, Joe,” she tried again.  “You won’t even know I’m there.  Really,” she pleaded, looking up to meet his eyes imploringly.

“Jenny,” Joe squirmed uncomfortably.  “Jenny, none of the other men will have their wives there,” he explained.  “And it’s dangerous, Jenny.  We’ll be using explosives to clear the stumps.  It’s no place for a woman,” he said, shaking his head.

“Joe!” Jenny exclaimed, mildly outraged.  “Joe, I can take care of myself!  I won’t be in any danger.”

“Jenny, I’m not going to argue about it.  I’ll only be gone a week and you’ll stay with Annie while I’m gone,” Joe stated firmly.

Breaking away from his hands, Jenny huffed, turning her back to him, “Well, alright, Joe.  If you don’t want me there…..”

“Jenny,” Joe began, his tone gentle as he came up close behind her.  “Jenny, what’s this all about anyway?” he asked, trying to understand.

“N-nothing, Joe,” Jenny stammered, shrugging her shoulders nonchalantly, not about to tell him she didn’t want to be away from him, was frightened maybe even.  She knew it wasn’t like she’d be alone, she’d be staying with Annie and Hoss and her father-in-law but…but…well, she had to admit it.  Joe was the one who made her feel safe.  While she knew that both her father-in-law and her brother-in-law were good men, both of them intimidated her a little.  Hoss because of his size and Joe’s father because of his voice.  Yes, Ben Cartwright boomed, Jenny thought, that was the only word for it.  But not Joe.  Joe never boomed.  She felt safest with him and she didn’t want him to go away, not now, not without her.  Not after what had happened today.

Reaching out, Joe turned his wife around, scanning her face as he tried to read her.  “The week’ll go by before you know it, Jenny,” he soothed, surprised that she was so upset about his leaving.  She had seemed fine with the idea when they’d first discussed it.  Drawing her into his arms, Joe squeezed her tight.  “Really, Jenny, in no time at all I’ll be back to drive you crazy like I always do,” he teased.

Smiling involuntarily into his chest, Jenny denied his assertion. “You don’t drive me crazy, Joe.  At least, you haven’t in almost a week,” she teased, her voice muffled into his chest.

Chuckling at her words, Joe reached his hand to tilt her face up to his.  “A whole week?” he asked in mock disbelief.  Dropping his voice low, he whispered, “Well, I’d better see what I can do to fix that,” as he lowered his head to brush her lips with his.  Moving her hands up his back, Jenny clasped the back of his shoulders, melting herself into him as the kiss between them suddenly deepened almost without effort.  Pulling back a moment or two later, Joe stared down into his wife’s eyes, eyes now clouded dark with passion and, unknown to him, mirroring the passion in his own eyes.  “I have to finishing packing, Jenny,” he said in a shaky voice.  “I have to….,” he started to repeat, then groaned and lowered his head again.
Chapter 9
*********

“Well, I’d put it about the early part of December,” Dr. Paul Martin opined his estimation of Jenny Cartwright’s due date to the young woman as she sat before him, her sister-in-law at her side.  As planned, Jenny and Annie had come into town to see the doctor the morning after Joe’s departure to oversee the fulfillment of the timber contract and the doctor’s thorough examination had yielded what Annie’s sharp eyes had spotted in a moment.  Jenny Cartwright was expecting, or carrying, or in a family way, or any one of a dozen other expressions of the day that colloquially referred to a pregnant woman.

Sitting across from the doctor, Jenny stared blankly back at him as he offered his opinion of the expected arrival time of her baby.  She just couldn’t take it all in.  Even after Annie had told her of her suspicion two days ago she hadn’t really believed it could be true, thinking she was just getting her hopes up and they’d come crashing back to earth when she saw the doctor and he told her it wasn’t true.  But he wasn’t saying it wasn’t true.  He was telling her other things, like to get plenty of rest and to eat well and not to worry, most of the queasiness she was feeling would likely disappear fairly soon — things Jenny was only half-listening to, her mind still too shellshocked to take in anything since the doctor had uttered the words “you’re going to have a baby”.

“Well, I guess that just about covers everything,” Doc Martin was saying.  “Do you have any questions, Jenny?” he asked kindly, his question pulling Jenny from her reverie.

“Questions?” Jenny repeated, still finding it an effort to concentrate.  “I…I don’t think so.”

Considerably less dazed by the goings-on than her sister-in-law, Annie had the presence of mind to chime in with a question.  “What about riding?” she asked the question, the one thing in her own considerable medical expertise that she wasn’t sure about.

“Riding?” Dr. Martin repeated, turning his gaze from Jenny to Annie.

“Yeah,” Annie confirmed.  “Jenny likes to ride.”

A small smile flickering across his face in remembrance — who could forget that Jenny and Little Joe rode in just about every race from here to Placerville? — the doctor replied, addressing Annie, “Well, I don’t see that riding in moderation would be a problem at this stage.  Of course, any ‘racing’ is out of the question.  But within reason Jenny should still be able to ride, that is, until the advancement of her pregnancy prohibits it.”  A small silence greeting his pronouncement as Annie nodded in understanding and Jenny just continued to look dazed, Dr. Martin prompted, his gaze volleying between the women, “Anything else?” as another small smile played about his mouth.

Turning to look at her sister-in-law at the doctor’s question and seeing Jenny’s still-dumbfound expression, Annie turned back to the doctor to answer for her, “No, nothing else.”

“Well, Jenny, I’ll see you at your next appointment,” he said, rising to usher the women to the door.  “And don’t hesitate to come before then if you have any questions or concerns,” he added as the women thanked him and headed out the door.  Alone in his office, Paul Martin shook his head, a pleased expression on his face.  Today hadn’t started out very well, what with that broken arm he’d had to reset but things had improved considerably since then.  Yes, finding out a new Cartwright was on the way made it a very good day indeed. 

Walking along the sidewalk next to her sister-in-law, Annie Cartwright came to a stop next to their buggy as Jenny continued past her, walking at least six steps beyond.  “Jenny!” Annie called out, wondering where Jenny was going.

Turning at the sound of Annie’s voice, Jenny looked back to ask, “Yes, Annie?”

Gesturing towards the buggy, Annie pointed out, “This is our buggy.”

“Oh…oh, right,” Jenny acknowledged, pulled from her daydream back to reality.  Moving back towards Annie, Jenny brushed past her to climb into the conveyance as Annie followed behind, a tender smile on her face.

Chapter 10
**********

If Jenny had known it was just a dream while she was dreaming it, maybe it wouldn’t have frightened her so.  But dreams, or more rightly, nightmares, seldom worked that way.  The astonishing news of her impending motherhood and the alarming return of her father, both events coming on the heels of the other, coupled together in her mind, breeding an incoherent nightmare that saw her father the sinister force demanding her child as payment for some imagined debt.  Bolting upright in bed in the early morning hours as she awoke from the nightmare, her body soaked in sweat, Jenny threw back the covers and reached for her riding clothes. 

She had to tell Joe.  Had to tell him both pieces of news. 

Joe would know what to do.

**********

Riding her horse towards the camp several hours later, Jenny and Lightening were both startled by a loud blast in the distance.  Explosives, Jenny realized, remembering Joe had told her they’d be using explosives at the site, as she frantically reined her horse, trying to control him as he reared in fright.  As another blast followed the first, Lightening reared higher, spilling the rider from his saddle.  Falling to the ground, her head connecting with a rock, Jenny fell silent and still.

**********

“Hoss!” Annie called out in alarm.  “Hoss, look!” she said, thrusting the note left on Jenny’s bureau at her husband.

Scanning the note, Hoss looked up in concern.  “She’s gone up to Joe’s camp.  I’ll get Pa and we’ll go after her,” he said, thrusting the note back to his wife before turning quickly on his heel.

Staring down at the note in her hand, Annie worriedly read the hurriedly scrawled words again.

I NEED TO TALK TO JOE.
**********

Such a pretty little thing she was, with all that pretty pale hair.  And so peaceful-like.  The way she was lying there on the ground asleep or maybe she was dead.  That’s it.  She was dead, the white-haired old woman nodded to herself.  Spotting a pretty ring the woman wore, the old woman reached down, tugging it from her finger.  “Pretty,” the old woman admired as she held the gold band to the sun.  Suddenly remembering it was time to eat and she needed to start the fire, the woman turned and headed away, humming a cheerful tune. 
**********

“Joe, we found something,” Sheriff Roy Coffee hesitantly approached the young man in the courtyard of the ranch house where he and his father had come to get fresh horses.  They’d been searching for two days now.  Searching for Jenny.  Her horse had come back but there was no sign of Jenny.  The sheriff, the posse, the ranch hands and every Cartwright was out searching but nothing had been found.  Joe hadn’t slept in two days but then none of his family had either.

“What?  Did you find her?” Joe asked urgently, hope in his eyes as Ben rushed to his side, awaiting Roy’s words.

“Joe, it’s like this,” Roy began, never liking to be the one bearing bad news.  “A coupla of the boys spotted a burned out patch up near Shady River. When they got there they found a woman…or, what remained of a woman, she was too…too…well, there wasn’t much left to identify her.  She was small, Joe.  Light hair,” he said, his implication clear.

“NO!” Joe rebelled at the information, suddenly agitated.  “It’s not Jenny!” he denied the sheriff’s words.

“Joe,” Ben put his hand on his son’s arm. 

“No, Pa!  It’s not her!” Joe shouted forcefully, breathing hard as he lashed out angrily.  “It’s not her!”

Pulling a small object from his pocket, the sheriff held his palm out, the small object glistening in the sun.  “They found this too,” the sheriff said.

A cry not unlike that of a wounded animal eminated from Joe’s lips as he stared down at his wife’s wedding band.  There was no mistaking her ring, the intertwining J’s a unique creation.  Clutching his stomach in pain, Joe sank to his knees, railing at the injustice, the single word “no” repeated in endless repetition.  Falling to the ground next to Joe, Ben reached out his arms around his son, his youngest son, his boy, and held him tight.

Chapter 11
*********

Coming up to his wife as she leaned against a tree, a distance away from the back of the house after the funeral, Hoss quietly approached her.  “Annie?” he called out gently when he drew near as Annie stiffened at his voice, straightening away from the tree but not turning around.  “Annie, come inside,” he urged, worried.  She’d been so quiet, so quiet since it all happened.

Shaking her head, her back to him, Annie replied, “Not yet, Hoss.”

“Annie,” Hoss’s voice dropped in tender compassion as he moved to stand behind her.  Although she didn’t show it, he knew she was hurting.  They all were.  But Jenny and Annie had become like sisters in the short time they’d been sisters-in-law.  Even he had seen that.  But she shouldn’t grieve for her alone.  Reaching out, Hoss placed his hands on her arms, just below her shoulders.  “Come into the house, Annie,” he entreated.

“No, Hoss, I…I…,” Annie dropped her head, unable to continue as she began to weep.

Finally hearing the first outward display of her pain, Hoss turned his wife into his arms.  “I know you’re hurting, Annie.  But Jenny wouldn’t want….,”

“I should have known, Hoss!” Annie interrupted to berate herself, her voice muffled as she cried into his chest.  “I should have known!” she wailed.

“Annie…Annie….,” Hoss tried to soothe her.

“Why didn’t I know?” Annie asked tortuously, her tears suddenly angry.  She could see things.  She’d always been able to see things.  Why hadn’t she seen that Jenny was in trouble?  Why hadn’t she felt something?  What was the use of having the gift of sight if you couldn’t help the people you loved?  “Why didn’t I know?” Annie cried again, louder, angrier.  Pulling a step back out of Hoss’s arms, she shook her head from side to side, railing angrily as she raised her fists to pound on his chest.  “Why didn’t I know?” she cried out, almost frenzied now with her grief as tears coursed her face.

“Annie…Annie…,” Hoss pleaded, stunned by her display but not moving to halt her as she continued to pound on his chest, weeping and ranting.  Suddenly spent, Annie collapsed back into his arms, as Hoss wrapped his arms tightly around. 

Crying in his arms, Annie’s voice was small and despondent.  “Why didn’t I know?” she pleaded the question, despairing of an answer.

Holding her close, Hoss didn’t answer his wife’s unaswerable question, just held her safe and tight as her sobs wracked her body.

At the front of the house, Katherine Cartwright looked worriedly about her.  “Adam?  Adam, have you seen Joe?” she asked, worry in her tone.  “He wandered off after the funeral and I haven’t seen him since.  He…he shouldn’t be alone, Adam,” Katherine opined in concern.

Nodding in understanding to his wife, Adam reached a hand to reassuringly squeeze his wife’s arm.  “I’ll go look for him, Katherine.  You go inside with Pa,” he said, as Katherine nodded, blinking and swallowing her own tears of grief.

As his wife left his side, Adam looked about him, finally heading in the direction of the barn.  “Joe?” Adam called, entering the dim barn.  “Joe, you in here?” he called again.  Receiving no reply, he turned to head outside, wondering where Joe had gone to.

“Yeah, I’m here.”

Turning around at the sound of muffled voice, Adam peered around the spacious barn, still not seeing his brother. 

“Where here?” he called out softly.

“Here…in the stall at the end,” Joe informed him, his voice still muffled, as Adam moved to the back of the barn.  Peering into the last stall, he saw his brother, sitting on the floor in the corner, his head lowered onto his crossed arms propped on his knees before him.

“Joe!” Adam exclaimed.  “Joe, what’re you doing out here?  Why don’t you come into the house?” he questioned tenderly.

Shaking his head a little, Joe stammered, not looking up, “No…no…I can’t….,” his voice filled with unshed tears.

Moving closer Adam crouched low beside his brother.  “Joe.  Come into the house.  You…you shouldn’t be alone,” Adam counselled, reaching out to gently touch his brother’s arm.

“No!” Joe responded, shaking off his brother’s touch as he jerked away, a note of defiance in his voice.  “I told you I can’t!” he defended, his voice rising sharply.

“Joe, come talk to Pa and Hoss,” Adam continued, realizing it was only Joe’s pain talking, that made him so angry and short.  “They love you, Joe.  They’re worried about you.”

“Do you think I don’t know that?” Joe angrily shot back, finally raising his head to look his brother in the eye. 

Seeing his brother’s expression, Adam inhaled sharply.  It was worse, much worse than he’d thought.  The pain.  The anguish.  It was all there written on his face, raw and exposed like an open wound.

“Joe…,” Adam’s voice was tender, a tenderness he hadn’t used on his brother since Joe was a boy.

“Leave me alone, Adam!” Joe lashed out.  “Just leave me the hell alone!” Joe demanded, turning his body away to the side and burying his head on his arms.  Drawing his legs out from under him, Adam sat on the floor, resting his forearm on one raised knee with his back to the stall wall, his move to a more permanent position a telling indicator that he wouldn’t be leaving anyone the hell alone.

“Joe, Pa and Hoss….,” Adam tried again.

Shaking his head as it rest on his arms, Joe cut in, his voice sneering, “Man, you just don’t get it, do you?  I can’t talk to them now.  I can’t see them now and I don’t want them to see me.”

Swallowing this piece of information, Adam probed, “Why not, Joe?”

“WHY NOT?” Joe shouted back, infuriated and incredulous, as he raised his head, turning to look sharply at his brother.  “WHY NOT?” he repeated, breathing hard.  “I’ll tell you why not.  Because they love me!” he shouted.  “Because I love them and I can’t…I can’t…,” Joe broke off, tortured, blinking furiously.

“You can’t what, Joe?” Adam probed.

The apple of his throat working up and down as he fought for control, Joe ground out, “I can’t give them my pain.  I can’t hurt them with my pain.”

Absorbing his brother’s words, Adam mulled them over for a moment before slowly offering, “Then give me your pain, Joe.”

“What?” Joe froze at the offer, stiffening in stunned surprise.

“You can’t talk to Pa or Hoss because you love them,” Adam repeated his understanding of the situation.  “You don’t want to hurt them by letting them see how much you’re hurting,” he mapped out.  “I’m not Pa or Hoss.  You can give me your pain,” Adam offered for the second time.

Suddenly contrite, Joe faltered, “Adam…Adam….I didn’t mean….,”

“I know, Joe,” Adam interrupted.  “You didn’t mean that you don’t love me.  But it’s a little different with us, isn’t Joe?  I mean, Pa was always your father and Hoss was always your brother.  I’ve been a little bit father to you and little bit brother.  Never really completely one or the other.  So the way I see it, that should make it easier.”

“Adam….,” 

Holding up his hand, Adam continued, “Joe, talk to me.  You need to get it out and I can listen.”

“Adam, I….,” Joe faltered, as he hung his head, shaking it slightly, blinking back the tears.  “Adam, I…..,”

“Come on, Joe,” Adam prompted, the tenderness back in his voice, the tenderness of Joe’s boyhood, as he reached out his hand to squeeze Joe’s arm as it rest on his knees.

Shaking his head as he struggled with his decision, Joe inhaled deeply, tilting his head upwards and blinking as he stared up towards the ceiling.  The decision made a moment later, he finally lowered his head to confess, “Adam…Adam, I hurt so bad,” the words torn from his soul in wrenching anguish.  “I never knew it was possible to feel so much pain and still be alive,” he choked out, swallowing hard, the words tumbling from him now as he trembled, trying to control the flood of feelings consuming him.  “I feel like I’m already dead.  Like I’ve died a thousand times and I don’t know why I’m still breathing,” he uttered disbelievingly.  “When they…when they put her in the ground all I could think was I wanted to jump in there with her,” he confessed, his breaths coming in ragged rasps.  “I can’t…I can’t live without her.  I can’t…and I don’t want to,” he cried, dropping his head onto his arms again as his shoulders shook with silent sobs, his hands clenched into tortured fists. 

Sliding closer, Adam reached an arm across Joe’s shoulders, his other hand still resting on Joe’s arm.  Holding his brother as his grief consumed him, Adam struggled to find words, words to salve his pain.  He was a learned man, an educated man, but it was his father and his brother Hoss who knew how to speak what was in their hearts.  Looking into his own heart now, Adam saw the words there.  It was only a few words, only four, words he might not have spoken before but he gathered them together and spoke them today.

“I love you, Joe.”

And it was as if those words suddenly snapped the bonds of constraints between them, freeing them both.  Sobbing out loud now, Joe turned into his brother’s arms, butting his head to his chest as Adam held him tight, one arm around his back and his other hand at the back of his neck.  Holding his brother to him as Joe poured out his hurt, Adam had a sudden revelation, thinking of their complex and sometimes difficult relationship.  He’d been part father to Joe.  Part father.  Part brother.  He was the eldest and Joe forever the youngest.  Sometimes at peace with each other; more often at odds.  Squeezing Joe tighter, Adam knew that what was once complex was now blindingly simple.  Not father.  Not child.  Not eldest.  Not youngest. 

Simply, brothers.

Chapter 12
**********

Sinking into the saloon chair a week later, Joe rested his elbows on the table, dropping his head wearily into his hands.  He was tired, so damn tired.  He’d been riding for days, aimlessly wandering with no destination in mind, not even knowing the name of the town he’d stumbled upon.

He’d had to leave the ranch.  Couldn’t bear it any longer.  The carefully controlled concern of his family.  The constant reminders of Jenny.  They were everywhere, the Ponderosa ranch house, Virginia City where they’d first met, every range they had ridden together.  But especially their house.  Their home.  It was there that he missed her the most, saw her in everything he touched, her absence filling the room with its cruel void. 

It was the curtains that had finally done it.  Had driven him to leave.  He’d found himself studying them one day.  Staring at them for hours.  She’d made them herself.  She’d been so proud of them, even with their imperfections.  She’d laughed at herself, at discovering her mistake when he’d helped her to hang them only to find out the left side panel was four inches shorter than the right.  She’d said she was just being original, that no one else had curtains like these.  And then she’d clutched her stomach, convulsed with merriment, her eyes filled with mischief and mirth and he’d laughed along with her, her laughter contagious.

So now he was sitting in the middle a saloon in the middle of a town he didn’t even know the name of, all because of some curtains.

“Well, am I glad to see you,” the bartender said to the petite young woman as she made her way into the saloon, carrying a tray in her arms.  “We’re just about out of clean glasses.”

“I’m sorry I’m so late,” the woman apologized, exchanging the clean glasses on her tray with the dirty ones waiting for pickup.

His head resting in his hands as he overhead the exchange, Joe groaned aloud.  Why couldn’t he shut the sound of Jenny’s voice out of his head?  Why did even strangers sound like her?

It was a few minutes after the woman had left that the bartender suddenly exclaimed in realization, “Damn, she forgot the shot glasses!”  Hailing one of the barmaids, the bartender called out, “Nellie, run over and tell Jenny she forgot the shot glasses, will ya?”

“Do it yerself!” Nellie brazenly retorted as the bartender rolled his eyes.

Jerking in surprise, Joe raised his head from his hands, turning to look at the bartender.  Jenny?  Did he say Jenny?  Getting up Joe moved swiftly to the bar, leaning forward urgently towards the bartender.

“What can I get ya?” the bartender enquired of the young man before him.

“Did you say Jenny?” Joe asked.  “Was the girl here a minute ago named Jenny?”

Eyeing the man suspiciously, the bartender answered, “Yeah.”

“Was she blond?  Kinda small?” Joe asked, a sense of urgency in his question.

“Yeah,” the bartender concurred, looking sideways at the man.  “Why’dya want to know?”

“Tell me where she is,” Joe ignored his question to demand.  “Where did she go?” asked excitedly, suddenly for some reason hopeful but not knowing why.  It wasn’t possible, was it?  Jenny couldn’t be alive and if she was, what was she doing here?  But it had sounded like her, her name was Jenny and the bartender said she was blond and small. 

His eyes narrowing on the man, the bartender shook his head, not about to divulge anyone’s whereabouts to a stranger, espcially not those of the young woman who arrived in town two weeks ago in such a sorry state.  “I think you’d better go see the Doc.  He’ll tell you all you need to know.”

“Look, just tell me where she is,” Joe pleaded.

“Look, mister, I ain’t telling you a thing.  If you wanna find the gal you’ll have to talk to the Doc.”

Frustrated, Joe turned, pushing his way out the saloon doors in search of the town doctor.

*************

“Yes, the descrition matches,” Dr. Matthews said to the young man before him, confirming the characteristics of his patient, a young woman who’d come to town two weeks ago, confused and disoriented, the bump on back of her head alluding to a recent injury, the scars on her back indicating an old one.  “Blond.  Petite.  About twenty or twenty-one.”

“Twenty-one,” Joe corrected.  “Tell me where she is,” he implored, suddenly knowing this had to be Jenny.  It all fit.  The description.  The time of the woman’s arrival in town, the story of the older couple who’d picked her up wandering on the road, her loss of memory, the satchel in her possession with the name Jenny embroidered on the front.  It all fit.

Holding up his hand the doctor cautioned, “Now just a minute, Mr. Cartwright.  I want your assurance first that if this is your wife you won’t tell her who you are.  In cases of amnesia like this there is always the danger of further trauma if the patient is presented with information they can’t recall and in Jenny’s condition…..”

Impatient, Joe interrupted, the doctor’s last words lost on him, “I already told you I won’t tell her.  Now where is she?”

Sighing the doctor gave in.  “She works at the restaurant.  She’s likely there right now.”

Bolting from his chair, Joe headed to the door, pausing a brief second to turn back and utter, “Thanks,” before heading hurriedly out the door.

***********

Stepping out of the restaurant three days later, Jenny Clark wrapped her shawl around her and peered into the night air apprehensively.  She was always a little nervous walking home in the dark.  Oh, it was only nine o’clock, early if your destination was the saloon where things were just getting warmed up but for her it was the end of her shift when the restaurant closed and she dreaded the walk home.  Not that she’d had any trouble.  No real trouble, that is.  Just a few whistles now and again from some of the more boisterous townsmen, an occasional unrequited invitation thrown out her way.

Making her way through the streets to the boarding house, Jenny kept her head down, averting the admiring glances cast her way.  It wasn’t a large town and most people knew about the new resident, word spreading quickly about the beautiful girl who couldn’t remember where she’d come from.

But Jenny didn’t want to know where she’d come from.  She already knew enough about her past to know she didn’t want to find out more.  Things like, she’d been beaten and whipped, the scars on her back telling her that.  Things like, she wasn’t married, even though Dr. Matthews had informed her she was with child, her ringless hand telling her that.  Things like, she’d been running away from wherever she’d been, the way she’d been dressed and the supplies she’d had with her telling her that.  And things like, no one cared enough about her to look for her, the fact that…well, the fact that no one was looking for her telling her that.

No, Jenny Clark — the first name deduced from a patch of embroidery, the last from her imagination — was only interested in today, the here and now, her only concerns to support herself and to save enough to support her coming child.

Breathing a sigh of relief as she came close to the boarding house, Jenny was startled when a man suddenly stepped from the shadows to block her path.  “Hey, there, sweet thing.  How ’bout you and me getting a little drink over at the saloon?” the man leered the invitation.

“No thank you,” Jenny primly replied, moving to go past him as the man reached out to pull on her arm.  “Let me go!” Jenny cried in alarm.

“Not too friendly, are ya?” the man derided.  “Well, maybe this’ll warm you up,” the man smirked, lowering his face towards hers, his intent clear.

“NO!” Jenny shouted, turning her face from side to side, trying to avert the man’s kiss as he held her tightly by her arms.  Suddenly she was released from his grasp, the man pulled off of her in a flurry of motion.  The sharp sound of a fist connecting to jaw delivered the man onto his backside into the street.  As Jenny’s  gaze moved from the man in the street to a second man before her, her eyes widened in surprise.  It was Joe Cartwright.  The nice man from the restaurant.  The one who’d come in for breakfast, lunch and dinner for the past three days, always kindly enquiring after her well-being when she’d come to serve him.  If she sometimes felt his eyes on her while she went about her duties, it didn’t bother her any.  If he sometimes asked her strange questions, it didn’t bother her any.  He was a nice man and she was happy to engage in conversation with him.  But this was the first time she’d seen him outside of the restaurant.

“Jenny, are you alright?” Joe asked, not taking his eyes from his opponent, still sprawled in the street.

“I’m alright,” Jenny confirmed.

“You’re lucky she said that,” Joe called out menancingly to the other man.  “Or you’d be dead right now,” Joe added slowly, as he stood facing the other man tensely, his body in draw position as he stared the man down.  “Now get up and leave,” he ordered.  “And if I see you within a hundred feet of this woman again, I will kill you.”

The man in the street rose slowly to his feet, swallowing nervously at the other man’s proclamation.  There was no mistaking his sincerity, that he would do exactly as promised.  Reaching down, the man retrieved his hat, before slowly backing out of sight.

Her accoster out of sight, Jenny turned in appreciation to Joe.  “Thank you, Joe.  I…..”

“What are you doing out here this late?” Joe interrupted, breathing hard as he turned his anger on her.  “Don’t you know it’s not safe?” he berated angrily, his voice sharp and loud.

What?  He was going to blame this on her?  Her own anger rising to match his, Jenny retorted, “Look, I’ve got every right to come and go as I please so I’ll thank you to just mind your own business!”

“Well, I’m making it my business!” Joe shouted.

Jenny’s anger on the boiling point —  the insufferable man — she reached into her skirt pocket, pulling out a ten-dollar bill before grabbing Joe’s hand and slapping the bill into his palm.  “What’s this?” Joe asked in surprise, startled as he stared blankly down at the bill in his hand.

“The tip you left me today!  YOU EARNED IT!” Jenny shouted, explaining the payment for his services, before angrily brushing past him to head up the walkway to the boarding house.  She’d intended to return his overgenerous tip anyway and this was the most perfect and deliciously satisfying opportunity.

Stunned, Joe watched as Jenny opened the front door of the house, slamming it closed behind her.  He stared blankly at the closed door for another moment before a small smile came to his lips.  When he’d first seen her in the restaurant and discovered she was alive, it had taken every ounce of control not to blurt his joy out loud, wanting to tell her how much he had missed her.  But his careful questions yielded nothing and it was apparent he was a stranger in her eyes.  Thinking to give her time, that she would remember the more she saw of him, he’d hung out at the restaurant, practically taking up residence at the table by the corner.  But the pleasant conversations he had with her at the restaurant contrasted sharply with the argument tonight.  Tonight their tempers had fed off each other and they’d both gotten a little hot under the collar, something they’d usually tried to avoid at home but weren’t always successful at.  Joe smiled more.

And oh, how he’d missed that too.

Chapter 13
**********
“Hey, are you alright?” Little Joe asked as Jenny swayed slightly before him, suddenly turning very pale, as she stood before him a few days later at his table in the restaurant, ready to take his order, friends again after the quick fire of their tempers had burned out.

“Yeah, I’m okay,” she answered, before turning to move quickly out of the room.

Puzzled by her hasty disappearance, Joe cast his eye quickly about the room before rising to follow her.  Finding her sitting on the bottom of the staircase in the foyer, leaning into the wall, he quickly moved to her, crouching low before her.

“Hey!” he began, alarmed to see her looking so pale.  “Are you sick or something?” he asked, worry in his voice.

“No, Joe, I’m not sick,” Jenny answered, closing her eyes as she took deep breaths.

“Well, you look sick to me,” Joe declared, moving to stand.  “I’m going for the doctor.”

Her eyes opening in alarm, Jenny quickly replied.  “No, Joe, really, I’m not sick….it’s just….it’s just the heat is bothering me a little,” she lied, using the excuse of the overwarm night to hide the real reason for her ill-feeling.  “Really, I don’t need a doctor,” she tried to reassure him, worried now about losing her job.  She couldn’t lose her job.  Not now.

“Are you sure?” Joe questioned her as he crouched low again, his eyes searching her face.

“Yes, I’m sure.  Now you go on back and have your supper.  I’ll just rest here a minute.”  Seeing that he made no motion to leave, Jenny coaxed, “Really, Joe, I’m fine,” just as another wave of nausea washed over her.  Turning her face into the wall, she closed her eyes again, biting on her lip.

“Jenny!” Joe exclaimed.  “Something IS wrong!  Tell me what’s wrong,” he implored.

Shaking her head into the wall, Jenny answered,  “Joe, it’s not your worry.  Please…please just leave me alone,” her tone pleading.

“I thought we were friends,” Joe replied.  “Hey, aren’t we friends?” he asked, reaching a finger out to turn her face to him, seeing tears in her eyes as she met his eyes.  “Friends can tell each other anything, right?” he coaxed, his heart breaking at the sight of her tears.

Her chin trembling at the gentleness in his voice, Jenny shook her head.  “I can’t tell you about this, Joe.  I can’t tell anyone about this,” she said.

“Hey, I’m a pretty good listener.  Why don’t you give me a try?” Joe asked, trying to get her to tell him what was wrong, wanting desperately to help her, not liking to see her in pain.

A moment of silence passed as Jenny considered.  It would be nice to have a friend to share her worry with, but…but….what would he think of her?  Well, nothing the rest of the town wouldn’t think when they found out anyway, she decided.  And if he wanted nothing more to do with her…well, maybe it was best to find that out sooner than later.  Looking down at her lap, for some reason not being able to look him in the eye, she confessed, choosing her words carefully, “Joe….I’m…I’m in trouble.”

“What kind of trouble, Jenny?” Joe asked.

Smiling a little at his naivety, Jenny answered, “The kind of trouble a girl sometimes gets in, Joe.”  Feeling him tense in shock before her as he inhaled sharply, Jenny turned her face to the wall again.  So, she’d shocked him then.  Maybe she shouldn’t have told him, maybe he wouldn’t be her friend anymore.

Freezing at his wife’s words, Joe was trying to curb his own emotions.  Jenny…she was going to have a baby!  Their baby!  At first stunned by the information and then outrageously joyous, Joe reached out to embrace his wife, stopping himself in time as he remembered the situation.  But surely he could tell her now.  Surely this changed everything, didn’t it? 

“I didn’t mean to shock you,” Jenny was apologizing, her words muffled into the wall.  “I’m sorry.  I shouldn’t have told you,” she said.

His heart pounding, Joe swallowed hard, trying to regain his composure, thinking it was a lot to ask of him, to appear outwardly calm when his insides were in such an uproar.  “I was a little surprised, Jenny, but I’m glad you told me,” he finally managed.  “I’m glad you told me,” he repeated tenderly, his meaning two-fold.  Thinking he had to try, now that he knew she was…she was…he had to try.  “What about…what about….,” Joe hesitated with the question, feeling his way.  “What about the father?” he finally managed.

Suddenly stiffening in agitation, Jenny shook her head violently. “NO!” she emitted the single word sharply.  No, she didn’t want to think of him, whoever he was, whoever had treated her so badly.  Whoever had beaten and whipped her, whoever she’d been running away from.  Already feeling an intense protectiveness towards her unborn child she knew she would never return to anyone who might treat her child as she’d been treated.

Seeing his wife’s agitation at his gentle inquiries, Joe immediately back off.  “It’s okay, Jenny.  Everything will……,”

“Hey!  What’re you doing out here?  I ain’t paying you to sit down on the job!” the angry voice belonging to Mr. Appleton, the restaurant owner, interrupted them.

Rising shakily to her feet, Jenny was immediately apologetic.  “I’m sorry, Mr. Appleton.  I’ll get back to work,” she said, moving to do so.

Rising to his own feet simultaneously with his wife, Joe reached out, taking her arm in his hand, forestalling her.  “Jenny, you’re not well.  You need to rest for a while,” he told her worriedly, not liking his wife’s continued paleness, her unsteadiness on her feet.  It was apparent the overwarm night combined with her condition was taking its toll on her.

“No, Joe,” Jenny contradicted him in mild alarm, before turning to look at her boss.    “No, really, Mr. Appleton, I’m fine.”

“Jenny, you need to rest a while,” Joe stated firmly, not about to let the matter drop, a fierce protectiveness overcoming him. 

“Joe, please!” Jenny exclaimed under her breath to him, her eyes pleading, praying he wouldn’t make a scene, make trouble for her.  She couldn’t risk upsetting her boss, couldn’t risk losing her job.  Pulling from his grasp, she turned, heading back towards the dining room.

“Git on in the back and git those dishes washed.  And when yer done, I want ya to start washing the table cloths.  I ain’t paying ya to be no lazy slacker,” Mr. Appleton gruffly barked the orders as she drew close to him.  Nodding her head, Jenny moved to obey.

Suddenly angry, Joe retorted, breathing hard at the man’s callous treatment of his wife, “Don’t talk to her like that!”

“What!  What did you say?” the man looked up at his accuser in outrage.

“You heard me,” Joe’s tone had become suddenly menacing as he coldly eyed the man. 

“Joe…Joe…,” Jenny stammered in alarm, sensing the explosive situation.

“She works fer me!  I’ll talk to her any way I want!” Mr. Appleton bellowed, his face turning an unattractive blotchy red.

“Not while I’m around,” Joe coolly replied, his voice a warning as he faced the man, narrowing his eyes on him.

“You git out of here!” Mr. Appleton yelled the order to Joe, outraged to be ordered about in his own establishment.

“Mr. Appleton….,” Jenny pleaded, trying to be the peacemaker.  “He didn’t mean….,” 

“And you can git too!” Mr. Appleton turned on Jenny in anger.  “I ain’t taking no more grief from either of you!” he yelled, his patience at an end.  “You’re fired!” he shouted, waving his arm in the arm dismissively before turning to storm angrily away as Jenny stared after him, her mouth slightly agape in shock.

Coming up behind her, Joe said, “I’m sorry, Jenny, but maybe it’s for the best.”  At this wife’s continued silence, her back to him, Joe prompted, “Jenny?”  Met with more silence, Joe reached out, turning his wife to face him and inhaling at little at the expression on her face.  “Jenny, don’t worry, it’ll be alright,” he soothed, worried at the way she looked so…so…worried.

Lost in her own world, with her own worries, Jenny stared blankly at Joe’s chest, still stunned from her boss’s pronouncement as she fretted aloud to herself, “But what will I do?”  The job at the restaurant was the only one she could find and it wasn’t likely she could get another one on such short notice.  And the rent was due at the boarding house on Monday and…

“You can work for me,” Joe interrupted her worries to suggest, the idea suddenly coming to him.

“What?” Jenny looked up to ask in surprise, his suggestion permeating her troubled mind.

“Well, not me,” he elaborated.  “My family.  You can work for my family,” Joe explained, the idea hatching even as he spoke.  “My brother and his wife, they have a little boy.  My brother is always saying that Annie works too hard.  I know they’d welcome the extra help, Jenny.  You can work for them.”

“But…but…,” Jenny stammered at the offer, hopeful and suspicious at the same time.  Looking for objections she found one.  “But you said your family lived outside of Virginia City.  I can’t travel all that way with you, Joe.  It wouldn’t be….proper,” she said as Joe smiled a little.

“Jenny, you’d take the stage,” he negated her concern.  “I’ll ride alongside.  Nothing improper about that, is there?” he teased.

“But…but…,” Jenny stammered again, thinking this was too good to be true, there had to be some fly in the ointment.  And then she remembered.  “But what about…what about…,” she trailed off, placing a hand to her belly.  “Won’t they mind that I’m…,”

Suddenly serious at her implied question, Joe replied, his voice soft with meaning, “No, Jenny.  They won’t mind.”

Her mind working on her decision, Jenny tried one more time.  “Joe, you’re not just offering me a job because you got me fired, are you?” she asked, wanting to know the truth, wanting to know if she was really needed or not.

Staring intently at his wife, Joe answered, “No, Jenny, I’m not doing this because I got you fired.”

Pausing a moment as she mulled over the offer, it suddenly occurred to Jenny that her circumstances left her little choice in the matter.  Whatever uncertainties she had about this job were pale in comparison to having no job at all.  The decision quickly made in that light, Jenny nodded her head.  “Alright, Joe, I’ll take the job.”

A pleased smile coming to his face, Joe reached out to squeeze her arm.  “Good,” he said, pleased at her acceptance, suddenly freezing as an observation made its way to him as he touched his wife.

“Joe?” Jenny looked up at him, wondering at his sudden silence.

“Jenny…,” he began, his hand on her arm.  “Jenny…you’re trembling,” he said, surprised at his observation.

Blushing slightly, Jenny pulled away from his grip.  “I’m cold,” she mumbled an explanation, wondering why she was suddenly so flustered as she turned away towards the door.  “Well, I’d better start packing,” she announced an excuse to move away since ‘packing’ consisted of the one other dress she owned.  Joe watched her as she moved towards the door, not moving from his place as he mulled the events.

She’d trembled when he touched her.  Just like she always did, always had.  Maybe some part of her knew who he was, even if she couldn’t remember.  Then again, maybe she was just cold, like she said.  Yes, that was it, he decided, she was just cold.  Suddenly, Joe grinned, remembering.

Such a warm June night it was.

Chapter 14
**********

Pulling into the Ponderosa ranch house courtyard in the rented rig, Jenny at his side, Joe admitted to himself that he was nervous.  Nervous at this first meeting of Jenny with the rest of her family.  Would seeing them jar her memory? he wondered.  He’d sent a second letter on ahead by express to them explaining the complex situation, the first letter sent shortly after he’d found her, but this one telling them he was bringing her home.  Told them she still had no memory of her husband and family and that the doctors had informed him it was best she remember on her own and not be confronted with the information.  He’d even arranged for them to take the stage to Carson City instead of Virginia City to rent a rig there since there was less chance anyone in that town would recognize Jenny as his wife.

Looking about her as they pulled into the courtyard, Jenny swallowed, admitting to herself that she was nervous.  Nervous at this first meeting with Joe’s family.  Would they like her? she wondered.  Where would she go and what would she do if they didn’t?  Swallowing again as she saw some people on the porch, moving towards them as they drew near, Jenny counted.  One, two, three….EIGHT! she tallied the final number in alarm.  Five adults and three children.  Joe hadn’t told her there’d be so many.  So many strangers to please if she were to guarantee her security.

Seeing his entire family as they approached the now-stopped buggy, Joe felt another twinge of worry.  They’d all turned out for Jenny’s return.  All of them.  Stepping out of the buggy, he moved to help Jenny down.  “Pa,” he began, his wife at his side as she eyed the strangers cloistered about her.  “Pa, this is Jenny…Jenny Clark,” he said, watching his wife’s face carefully for any signs of recognition and seeing none.

“Welcome to the Ponderosa, Jenny,” Ben smoothly replied, a smile on his face, no signs of unease or awkwardness.

“Thank you,” Jenny breathlessly replied, exhaling in relief just as Beth Cartwright, standing at her mother’s side, squealed in delighted recognition.

“Jenny!” Beth exclaimed, racing to her aunt and hugging her legs in reunited jubilation just as Buck, racing from his mother’s side, mimicked his cousin’s actions and Jenny stood frozen in stunned surprise, looking down at two small children wrapped tightly about her legs.

As Katherine and Annie eyed each other in alarm — in all the preparations for Jenny’s return they’d forgotten about the children — Katherine suddenly spoke up, smoothing the blunder, “Don’t mind the children, Jenny.  We told them you were coming and I guess they’re just so excited by it all.”

A smile of pleasure coming to her face, Jenny reached down, pulling the children slightly away before crouching low before them.  Looking from one to the other, she asked the adults standing beyond them, “What are their names?”

“The little girl is Beth.  My daughter,” Katherine clarified.

“My boy Buck,” Annie said.

“Well, Beth and Buck, I want to thank you for your fine welcome,” Jenny greeted the two youngsters, smiling her pleasure.  “And just as soon as I get settled in I hope we can play together.  How’s that sound?” she prompted.  At the children’s enthusiastic nods, Jenny’s smile widened and she rose back to her feet.

“Jenny, this is my brother Hoss and his wife Annie,” Joe continued the introductions.

“Welcome, Jenny,” Hoss and Annie said in unison.

“Mr. Cartwright.  Mrs. Cartwright,” Jenny nodded to the pair.

Unable to bear the formality from her sister-in-law, Annie piped up.  “They’ll be none of that Mr./Mrs. stuff.  It’s jist plain Hoss and Annie,” she stated firmly as Jenny smiled delightedly, suddenly thinking she was going to like it here.

“Hoss and Annie then,” she agreed.

“And my other brother and his wife,” Joe gestured to the final pair.

“Katherine,” Katherine quickly supplied her name.  “My husband Adam,” she added, identifying the man at her side and then the child in her arms, “and my other daughter, Fallon.  We’re so glad to have you with us, Jenny.”

“Welcome to the Ponderosa, Jenny,” Adam offered his own greeting.

“Thank you.  Thank you so much,” Jenny replied gratefully, nodding to the pair and wondering why she’d been nervous about meeting such fine people.

“Well, why don’t we go inside and get you settled in,” Ben offered the suggestion, holding out his arm indicating the way as Jenny nodded, giving Joe a final look before moving away.  As Ben and Jenny entered the house, Beth and Buck following excitedly on their heels, Joe turned to his brothers and sisters-in-law, a small silence overtaking them all.

A troubled expression on his face, Hoss broke the silence.  “She really don’t know us, does she?” he asked.

Shaking his head, Joe replied, “No, Hoss, she really doesn’t.  I told you that in the letter.”

“I know, Joe…I just thought…,” he trailed off.

“Joe, it’s a miracle she’s even alive.  Her memory will come back in time,” Adam interjected reassuringly as Joe nodded, knowing the fact that he even had Jenny back at all was incredible.  He had no right to wish for more than that.

“There’s…there’s one other thing I should tell you,” he changed the subject, finding himself embarrassed now that the moment had arrived and all eyes turned to him.  In all the scenarios he could have imagined of his sharing this news with his family, this was not one of them.  “Jenny…she’s…we’re…she’s going to have a baby,” he finally managed to blurt, dropping his head as he awaited their reaction to his startling news.

“We know, Joe,” Hoss informed him.

Looking sharply up, Joe was incredulous.  “What do you mean, you know?  I only just found out….,”

Holding up his hand, Hoss clarified.  “Annie knew, Joe.  Annie knew before the….Annie knew before, Joe.  She didn’t tell ya because…well, there weren’t no point in hurting you more, Joe.”

“I’m sorry, Joe,” Annie apologized for withholding the information from him.  “I just thought…..,” she trailed off.

Realizing they’d only been trying to protect him, Joe nodded, “I understand, Annie,” as he swallowed hard, not wanting to think of that awful time.

“Well, I don’t know why everyone’s so glum.  Don’t you know babies are good news?” Katherine suddenly interjected, her teasing remark cutting the tension as everyone laughed and Hoss and Adam slapped their brother on the back.

“You didn’t think you’d be the only one not woken at 2 in the morning by a crying baby, did ya, Joe?” Adam teased as the others laughed.

“And jist wait till you have to change a diaper or two!” Hoss added, his face a picture of mock revulsion.

“Diapers?” Joe repeated in mock puzzlement.  “I thought I’d just call you over to handle that, Hoss, you’re so good at it,” he teased, breaking out into a mischievous smile.

“Oh no you don’t!” Hoss laughed.  “I wouldn’t dream of denying you the pleasure, little brother,” he teased in mock concern.

Laughing along with everyone else, Joe turned to Annie.  “Annie, I’ll just go back to my place and get a few of my things.  I’ll only need a couple of shirts and things,” he explained, his intention of moving back to the ranch house clear.

“No, Joe,” Annie refuted his plans, shaking her head.

“What?” Joe asked, startled, the smile wiped from his face.

“The house is for Jenny, Joe.  You can’t stay here,” Annie stated firmly.

“But Annie!” Joe exclaimed in protest to this unexpected development.  “She’s my wife!”

“She don’t know that, Joe.  And until she does, you ain’t staying under the same roof with her,” Annie ordered, her high sense of propriety taking hold.

Breathing hard in disbelief at his sister-in-law’s unexpected decree, Joe flung the words angrily back at her, “Annie, I don’t intend to stay in the same room with her!”

“It don’t matter what you intend, Joe.  You ain’t staying here,” Annie was resolute in her dictate as she faced down her brother-in-law, crossing her arms in front of her.

“Ah, ah,” Hoss hemmed, glancing nervously between his wife and brother, the tension between them suddenly palpable.  “Joe, it’s for the best,” Hoss soothed persuasively.  “You can come here as much as you like.  You’ll jist be sleeping at yer place, that’s all,” he explained, hoping for his brother’s agreement.

Staring at his sister-in-law all the while, Joe paused, his breathing slowing as he finally yielded to her demand but directed his words to his brother, “Well, alright, Hoss.”

“Good,” Hoss breathed in relief.  “Now come on, everyone, let’s go inside,” he said, turning in that direction as the others followed behind.

Chapter 15
**********

“She’s alright, Joe,” Dr. Martin informed Joe Cartwright, after coming down the stairs into the great room of the ranch house, other members of the Cartwright family hovering nearby.  “Other than the memory loss, there’s no signs of any other injuries,” the doctor noted.  Summoned to the Cartwright ranch just two days after Jenny’s arrival, the startled doctor was shocked to learn that Jenny Cartwright was alive, suffering from apparent amnesia.  At the Cartwright’s urging he had used the pretext of ‘just making his rounds’ to take the opportunity to examine the young woman.

“And the…and the baby?” Joe asked, still concerned.

“The baby’s fine too,” the doctor said as Joe slumped in relief.  “Of course Jenny has a little more nausea than I’d like to see at this point but I’m sure that will settle down in time,” the doctor added as Joe perked back up in worry.

“Nausea?” he asked.

“Morning sickness,” the doctor clarified.  “Although with Jenny it doesn’t seem to be just ‘morning’.”  Seeing the young husband’s worried expression, Dr. Martin reached an hand to his arm, giving it a reassuring tap.  “Don’t worry, Joe.  Most women have some degree of illness during pregnancy.  It’s all part of bringing a new life into the world.”

Nodding his head, Joe moved on to his next worry.  “And her memory…how long before she gets her memory back?” he asked.

“Well, Joe,” the doctor hesitated.  “It’s hard to say….”

“How long?” Joe repeated the question impatiently.

Sighing a little, the doctor explained.  “Joe, there’s so much we don’t know about the brain.  And we know even less about brain injuries like amnesia.  She might remember tomorrow, or next week or next year or she might never remember,” he said as Joe swallowed hard at the reality.  “I have to agree with the other doctor, Joe.  The current thinking is that confronting an amnesiac with their history would only induce more trauma.  That’s the current thinking and I think you’re doing the best thing by following that advice,” he said as Joe lowered his head, nodding in disappointment.  “Besides…” the doctor began, only to stop, thinking maybe he shouldn’t mention it.

“Besides what?” Joe looked up sharply, seeing the doctor’s hesitation.

Completing what he’d begun, the doctor disclosed, “Besides, she exhibited extreme agitation when I questioned her about her past, to see what she could remember.  I got nothing out of her — it’s apparent she remembers nothing — but it’s not hard to see that she’s afraid of her past, of where she came from.”

“But why?” Joe asked, not understanding.  “Why would she feel like that when we’re her past?” he questioned, waving his hand towards the others in the room.

“Well, Joe,” the doctor ruminated. “I guess if I woke up not knowing where I’d come from but could see by the scars on my body that I’d been beaten and whipped I’d be afraid of my past too,” he astutely surmised, as Joe blinked and swallowed painfully at the accurate summation.

“But…but…I’d never hurt her,” he protested desolately.

“Joe, I know that!” the doctor exclaimed.  “Look, just keep doing what you’re doing.  The familiar faces and surroundings.  And time.  Just give her time,” the doctor advised, reaching out to pat Joe’s arm before moving past him as Ben came forward to see the doctor out the door.
Chapter 16
**********

Finishing up the noontime dishes in the kitchen a week later, Jenny glanced surreptitiously around the room and seeing that Annie’s attention was elsewhere, she reached for two carrots, stuffing them into her apron pocket before grabbing two dishcloths.  “Annie, I’m just going to hang the wet dishcloths on the line,” she announced over her shoulder as she moved to the door, opening it and escaping outside.  Quickly drapping the two cloths over the washline at the back of the house, Jenny turned, heading for the barn.  Entering the dim interior a moment later, she quickly moved to the horse in the last stall, a somewhat lean-looking black mustang.  As the horse began whinnying in recognition of the treat-bearing woman, Jenny reached into her pocket, retrieving a carrot and holding it out before the animal. 

“Look what I brought you,” she cooed softly to the animal, watching as the equine creature nibbled on the carrot in her hand.  Reaching out, Jenny ran her other hand along the animal’s neck.  “You like that, do you?” she asked teasingly at the horse’s enthusiastic acceptance of her gift, smiling as she watched him devour the rest of the carrot.  As if in response to her inquiry, the horse turned his head, nuzzling the woman as Jenny turned to press her face to his, reaching an arm under his neck to pat the other side of his head.

“Jenny?” 

Jenny jerked in surprise at the unexpected voice, a deep booming voice that sometimes startled her and ofttimes intimdated her.  Turning guiltily to its owner, she apologized, quickly straightening away from the horse.  “I’m sorry, Mr. Cartwright.  I’ll get back to work.”

Ignoring his daughter-in-law’s apology, Ben Cartwright moved closer to the pair.  “It’s a nice horse, isn’t it?” he asked casually, reaching out to run his hand along the horse’s neck, eyeing the animal critically.

“I guess so,” Jenny answered noncommittally, not wanting to appear too interested in the horse.  After all, she was hired to work up at the house, not to be out in the barn feeding carrots to the livestock.

A small smile coming to his lips at Jenny’s professed disinterest in her own horse, Ben Cartwright continued.  “Yes, a nice horse.  But a little on the scrawny side maybe,” he teased.

Rising to the bait, Jenny rose to the animal’s defense.  “Scrawny?  I don’t think he’s scrawny,” she countered hotly and then blushed to realize her impertinence.

“Well, maybe a little on the small side then,” Ben amended, trying to hide his smile.

Watching as her employer continued to gently stroke the animal’s coat, Jenny hesitantly moved a step closer.  “I…I have another carrot for him.  Would it…would it be alright if I gave it to him?” she asked.

“Why sure it would!” Ben enthusiastically responded.  “Lightening loves carrots,” he said.

“Lightening?” Jenny repeated on a question.  “That’s his name?  Lightening?” she asked.

“Hmm,” Ben nodded in affirmation the name of the horse he’d been boarding since what they’d all thought had been Jenny’s death.

Reaching into her pocket, Jenny pulled the remaining carrot out.  “Here you go, boy.  Here you go, Lightening,” she said, offering the treat to him.  She didn’t know why, but something about this horse appealed to her.  Appealed to her more than the others in the barn.  Maybe it was because he was small and a little on the thin side, like her.  Maybe it was because of the way he suddenly perked up when she came by.  Or maybe it was just because he looked like he needed someone to feed him carrots and she wanted to be that someone. 

A small, companionable silence followed as Jenny fed Lightening the carrot and Ben continued patting his neck, Jenny relaxing a little in the man’s presence as she realized he wasn’t going to chastise her for spending time out in the barn.

“Say, Jenny, I wonder if you’d do something for me,” Ben Cartwright suddenly announced into the silence.

Turning her head, Jenny immediately acquiesced, “Of course I will, Mr. Cartwright.  What would you like?” thinking maybe he wanted her to make him something to eat or had a shirt needing to be ironed.

“I wonder if you’d play a game of checkers with me.  I don’t feel like working and everyone seems to be so busy right now.”

Her mouth dropping a little at the request, Jenny stammered, “You…you want me to play checkers with you?”

“Only if you want to,” Ben amended. 

Well, if this wasn’t a corker, Jenny thought.  Not only was he not going to reprimand her for not working when she should have been, he wanted her to play a game of checkers with him, avoiding even more work.  A sudden mischievous twinkle in her eye, Jenny accepted his invitation, “Well, of course I will!”

“Well, good!” Ben teased as he accepted her acceptance, a delighted smile coming to his face as he met her eyes.

Smiling at each other, the two of them now partners in their collusive plot, Jenny turned back to the horse, reaching out to pat his neck.  “You know, I think you may be right,” she said, a small note of teasing creeping into her own voice.

“Oh?  What’s that?” Ben asked, his brow raised.

Jenny deliberately eyed the horse before her before leaning over to whisper conspiratorially, “He IS kind of scrawny.”

Laughing out loud at his daughter-in-law’s remark, Ben shook his head.  “No, Jenny,” he countered, his voice suddenly firm as he voiced his final opinion. 

“He’s just right.”
Chapter 17
**********

“Jenny!” Annie exclaimed in alarm at the sight of her sister-in-law toting the heavy basket of wet clothes outside near the washline.  Moving swiftly to her, she snatched the basket from her sister-in-law’s hands as Jenny’s eyes widened in surprise.  “Jenny, I told you I’d look after this.  You shouldn’t be carrying anything this heavy,” she admonished, mindful of Jenny’s condition. 

“But Annie,” Jenny protested.  “There’s nothing else to do.  All the dishes are done and….”

“Well, just take a break then!” Annie reproofed her.  “You don’t have to be busy every second!” she admonished, her words ironical considering Annie was known to do more work than she should herself.

“But Annie….” Jenny hesitated, uncertain.  Take a break?  If this wasn’t the most confounding family.  First Mr. Cartwright wants to play checkers when she should be working and now Annie was telling her to take a break.

“Go on,” Annie shooed her back towards the house as, shrugging lightly, Jenny turned to comply.

Walking through the empty great room a moment later, Jenny paused, freezing at the sudden, but lately familiar, feeling of nausea overtaking her.  Breathing slowly she waited, hoping this would just be a short episode, her bouts of nausea so frequent she could group them into “short, medium or long” or “mild, strong or unbearable” depending on their severity. 

Suddenly spotting Joe’s coat on the peg by the door, Jenny eyed it indecisively.  She really shouldn’t, she scolded herself.  It was Joe’s coat.  He’d left it here when he and his brothers and father had left to check on the cattle.  It was too hot a day for a jacket, not when they’d be out in the warm sun.

Her episode of nausea progressing from “mild to strong”, Jenny groaned in frustration, decisively moving to the door to reach for Joe’s jacket, lifting it down to wrap around her shoulders.  Relaxing as the peculiar effect of the coat took hold, Jenny felt her nausea receding.  She’d discovered the curious phenomenon quite by accident a week ago when, while suffering a bad episode while straightening the room, she lifted Joe’s coat from the settee where he’d casually deposited it earlier.  Almost immediately her uncomfortable queasiness had lessened and she’d stared disbelievingly at the coat in her hand, thinking it was too strange to contemplate.  But several other similar episodes had only confirmed the earlier findings and Jenny no longer questioned the curiosity, she was just happy to find relief when and where she could.

“Jenny, did you…..” Annie stopped as she came into the room from the kitchen, startled by the sight of her sister-in-law wearing her brother-in-law’s coat. 

A fierce blush on her face to be caught so red-handed, Jenny hastily removed the coat from around her shoulders, turning to hang it back on its spot on the wall.  “Did…did you want me to do something, Annie?” she asked, hoping to smooth the situation.

“Ah…ah…no,” Annie faltered, mystified by Jenny’s actions as she eyed her in bafflement. 

“Maybe I should iron those shirts now,” Jenny suggested, desperate to escape Annie’s scrutiny.

“Jenny, I told you to take a break,” Annie reminded her as she shook her head, her attention now diverted from Jenny’s puzzling display a moment ago.  “Now come on and set yerself down here in the chair by the fire,” she commanded.  As Jenny moved to obey, Annie reached for a nearby book, thrusting it at Jenny.  “Now read!” she ordered as Jenny hid a secret smile at the command.

First checkers and now reading.  Not bad work if you could get it.
Chapter 18
**********
“Jenny?” Annie called softly as she rapped lightly on Jenny’s bedroom door a few nights later.  Getting no response, she nudged the door open to poke her head inside.  “Jenny?” she called softly again seeing Jenny’s prone figure on the bed, a low moan her only reply.  Coming into the room, Annie approached the bed.  “Jenny, are you alright?” she asked, hearing her sister-in-law’s soft moans as she lay on top of the blankets on her back, still wearing her dress, an arm crooked over her eyes.

“I’m alright, Annie,” Jenny lied, thinking she’d never felt so rotten in her entire life.  When would it end? she wondered.  When would this rotten feeling ever end?  She just didn’t know how much more she could take. 

Coming closer, Annie sat on the bed, wedging herself next to Jenny’s side.  “Are you sure, Jenny?” she asked worriedly.  “You don’t sound alright,” she observed.

“Really, Annie, I’m…..,” Jenny denied, as she suddenly stopped talking and sat up, scooting by Annie to bolt from the bed to the washbasin. 

Coming up alongside her sister-in-law as she retched violently into the basin, Annie put a steadying arm around her until the retches subsided.  “Well, I guess you’re not alright,” Annie remarked dryly as she reached for a cloth, wetting it with the water in the pitcher before running it over Jenny’s face as she leaned weakly against the washstand, shivering with shock.  Leading her by the hand back to the bed, Annie pulled the blankets aside and nudged Jenny down to sit on the edge of the mattress.  Pulling a nightgown from the drawer, she handed it to Jenny as she commanded, “Here, put this on and get into bed.  I’ll bring something up to help settle yer stomach,” as Jenny nodded meekly, her head downcast.

“I…I’m sorry to be such a bother to you,” Jenny apologized, as she sat on the edge of the bed, still shivering.

“Now don’t you worry none about that,” Annie commanded.  “Jist git inta bed,” she ordered, moving to the basin and covering it with a towel before lifting it into her arms, as Jenny complied with her instructions and moved to undo the buttons down the front of her dress.  “I’ll be back in a few minutes,” Annie told her, as she headed out the door.

Her hands still trembling, Jenny finished undressing, pulling the nightgown over her head before lifting her legs to tuck her feet under the blankets.  Rolling onto her side, her back to the door,  she buried her head into the pillow, raising her hand to fist it before her mouth as she prayed for release from her misery.  For although she’d been sick just a moment ago, it hadn’t lessened her nauseous state very much.  How did other women do this? she wondered.  Or was it just her that found this so hard? 

Re-entering the room a short while later, a cup of tea in her hand, Annie approached the bed.  “Here, Jenny,” she said, reaching down to touch Jenny’s shoulder lightly, “I brought you some ginger tea.  It should help ter settle things down,” as Jenny rolled over onto her back to face her.

“Annie…Annie….I don’t think I…..,” she hesitated nervously.  “Annie, I don’t think I could keep anything down right now,” she confessed.  “But I want to thank you for being so kind….,”

Waving her hand at that, Annie interrupted, “Here.  I’ll set it here on the nightstand and maybe you can try it in a little while,” as Jenny nodded and rolled back onto her side, her back to Annie.

“Thank you,” she said.  “Thank you, Annie,” she repeated, a tremble in her voice.  “I don’t want to keep you.  I know you must have things to do….,” she trailed off, her voice cracking a little at the end.

Hearing the vulnerability in her sister-in-law’s voice, Annie moved to sit on the bed behind her, reaching a hand out to her shoulder to give it a little squeeze.  “Jenny, I ain’t got nothing else to do.  I ain’t going nowhere,” she reassured her.

“I’m…I’m sorry, Annie,” Jenny apologized, her voice muffled into the pillow.  “I don’t know why I have such a hard time with this.  I know….I know other women are able to bear it.”

Not liking what she was hearing, Annie’s voice was firm as she countered, “Now you jist listen to me.  Every woman is different.  Some have it easy and some have it hard.  Ain’t nobody gets to choose which or the other they get.  Now you got it hard and you ain’t gotta apologize to nobody for that.  Nobody. Y’hear me?”

Relief flooding her at Annie’s words, Jenny nodded into the pillow, stifling a cry.  “Th-thank you, Annie,” she choked out, grateful for the words of reassurance that she wasn’t being weak for admitting her difficulty. 

“Now you jist try and rest a little,” Annie tenderly instructed, rubbing her hand in circles over Jenny’s back, as Jenny expelled her breath a little, feeling the tension leave her body.  Relaxing for only a moment or two as Annie rubbed her back, Jenny felt another wave of nausea creep upon her, her body tightening in reaction.

“Jenny?” Annie queried, feeling the tension beneath her palm.

“It’s just another one,” Jenny mumbled through gritted teeth.  “It’ll pass in a minute.”

Feeling Jenny relax again as the episode subsided, Annie told her, “Jenny, I’m jist goin’ downstairs fer a minute.  I’ll be right back.”  Getting up, she headed out the door and down the stairs. 

“Hey, how’s Jenny doin’?” Hoss asked, as his wife came down the stairs from Jenny’s room a second time. 

“Not so good,” Annie succinctly informed him as she shook her head worriedly.  This was too hard on Jenny.  She shouldn’t have this much sickness.  She wouldn’t gain properly if she couldn’t keep anything down.  “Hoss, I want you to do something fer me,” Annie suddenly announced.

“Why shore, Annie,” Hoss agreed, puzzled by her tone.

“And I don’t want you to ask me any questions why.  Promise me?” she demanded.

“Annie!” Hoss exclaimed.  Whatever was this all about? he wondered.

“Will you promise not to ask me why, Hoss?” Annie demanded a second time.

“Well, okay, Annie.  What is it you want me to do?” Hoss asked, confused by the exchange.

Staring intently at her husband as she delivered her instructions, Annie said, “I want you to go to Joe’s place and bring his jacket back here.”

“Annie….?” Hoss began, stunned at the request.

“Now Hoss, you promised not to ask why.  Jist get going and don’t come back without it, y’hear me?” Annie’s voice rose as she meted out her demand, as she pushed her husband towards the door.

“Well, alright, Annie,” Hoss turned to do her strange bidding.  Women.  Who could figure them out?  Moving to the door he strapped on his gunbelt and reached for his hat as Annie turned to head back up the stairs.

***********

“What do ya mean yer coat’s not here?” Hoss demanded angrily of his little brother a short while later.

“Just what I said, Hoss,” Joe squeaked in protest.  “I ripped the sleeve when we were out mending the fence so I took it into town to the tailors,” he supplied, utterly confused by his brother’s demand to hand over his coat.

“Dangumit, Joe!” Hoss exclaimed in annoyance.  “Why didn’t ya jist bring it over fer Annie ta fix?” he demanded to know, wondering what the heck he was supposed to do now.  If he knew Annie like he was beginning to know Annie there would be hell to pay if he didn’t come back with that jacket.

“Look, what’s all this about anyway?” Joe asked in exasperation.  You know, he wouldn’t have pegged Hoss as one to go off the deep end but things were certainly heading that way.  “How come Annie wants my coat?” he asked, eyeing his brother suspiciously.

“I got no idea, Joe,” Hoss ground out grumpily, “but I ain’t gonna be the one ter tell her you ain’t got it,” he announced, reaching out to grab his brother by the arm to drag him outside.

“HEY!” Joe shouted in protest at the unruly handling.

“Jist come alone quietly, Joe, or so help me I’ll….,” Hoss trailed off threateningly, increasing his grip.

“Alright, alright!” Joe yelped.  “I’m coming.  I’m coming.  You don’t have to be so rough about it!” he said accusingly, pulling away and adjusting himself as Hoss released him from his grip.  “Sheesh!” he complained, pretending to dust himself off.  No doubt about it now, he thought to himself.  His brother and his wife were definitely loco.  Plum loco.

**********

“I said ter bring Joe’s coat, not JOE!!” Annie shouted in dismay, crossing her arms, as her husband and his brother stood before her in the great room of the Ponderosa  ranch house a short time later.

“I know ya did, Annie,” Hoss began nervously, trying to placate his wife.  “It’s jist…it’ jist….well, you tell her, Joe,” Hoss turned hopefully to his brother.

“Me?  I don’t have anything to tell her, Hoss.  This was all your idea,” Joe squeaked, a little nervous himself.  Boy, Hoss wasn’t kidding.  Annie really did look like she was ready to whup them both.

“Now, Joe, you know it ain’t my fault….,” Hoss began, his brow furrowing and his lips thinning as he turned his focus on his brother.

“Look, I came with you, didn’t I?” Joe interrupted, turning to face his brother as he professed his own innocence.

“Yeah, but yer the one who took yer coat inta town!” Hoss countered, laying blame as he poked his finger into Joe’s chest.

Poking back, Joe defended, is voice rising angrily, “Look, it’s my coat, isn’t it?”

Sighing as she watched her husband and her brother-in-law squabbling, Annie suddenly reached out, grabbing Joe by the wrist and yanking him behind her as she headed towards the stairs.

“What the…!” Joe exclaimed, stumbling behind her at his second rough handling of the night.

“Jist come along quietly, Joe, or so help me I’ll…..,” Annie trailed off threateningly, increasing her grip.

“Alright, alright!” Joe yelped.  “I’m coming, I’m coming!” he conceded, beginning to see the futility of it all, letting Annie pull him up the stairs as Hoss snickered quietly from the room behind.

Coming up to Jenny’s bedroom door, Annie turned to Joe, raising her finger to her lips in warning as Joe raised his brow in puzzlement at her.  What was this all about? he wondered. 

Rapping softly on the door, Annie poked her head into the room.  Seeing Jenny lying motionless in misery on the bed, on her side with her back to them, she led Joe into the room behind her.  “Jenny?” she called softly to her sister-in-law.  “Jenny, you have a visitor,” she announced softly as Joe stiffened in surprise and alarm.  What was wrong with Jenny?  Was she sick?

Rolling over, curious to know who had come to see her in such a state, Jenny let out a little involuntary gasp.  Not Joe.  She didn’t want Joe of all people to see her like this.  “Annie….,” Jenny began in protest.

“Shh,” Annie quieted her as she nodded at Joe, inclining her head slightly towards the bed as she silently urged him to proceed.  Obeying the silent instruction, Joe moved close, crouching low beside the bed and taking in his wife’s tear-streaked face with worry.  Jenny.  She’d been crying.

“Jenny?” he whispered tenderly, the apple of his throat bobbing up and down.  “Jenny, are you alright?” he asked gently, worry in his voice.

“I’m alright, Joe.  I….,” she faltered, turning her face into the pillow close to him as she closed her eyes, biting her lip as another wave of nausea overcame her.

“Jenny!” Joe exclaimed in alarm.  There was something wrong.  Turning his head, Joe looked back to Annie, his eyes wide in alarm, “Annie….,” his tone pleading.

Moving forward toward the pair, Annie silently reached down, taking Joe’s hand and placing it on Jenny’s arm, her hand atop his as she ran them both up and down.  Continuing Annie’s silent instruction after Annie’d removed her hand, Joe turned to look over at his wife as he rubbed her arm, as she suddenly seemed to relax at his touch, the tension leaving her body.  Rubbing her arm in silence, Joe felt the small tremors his touch always seemed to invoke course through her.  Not opening her eyes, Jenny let Joe touch her, any objection to the intimacy overridden as she felt the waves of uncomfortable nausea recede. 

Continuing his ministrations for several moments, Joe suddenly sensed that his wife was falling asleep, as her breathing deepened and her eyelids fluttered minutely.

“There,” Annie whispered a few moments later, touching Joe’s shoulder lightly.  “She’s alright now,” she breathed, nudging Joe up and away from the bed.  Pausing at the door, Joe turned to look back at his wife, soaking in the serene sight, before he turned and followed Annie out of the room.

Barely aware of Joe and Annie’s departure as she drifted into unconscious reverie, Jenny had a final thought before sleep claimed her completely.  She’d thought it was Joe’s coat that had made such a difference.  But it wasn’t his coat, she realized, the truth permeating her almost unconscious mind.  No, it wasn’t his coat.

It was Joe.
Chapter 19
**********
“Hey, Joe, come on in,” Hoss invited his younger brother into the ranch house.  Eyeing the small bouquet of flowers Joe was carrying, Hoss teased, “Hey, are those fer me?”

Chuckling a little to hide his nervousness, Joe replied, “No, they aren’t for you,” as he came further into the room to peer anxiously around.  “Hey, Pa, Annie,” he greeted his father and sister-in-law, sitting in the roomy chairs on either side of the fire.  “Is…is Jenny around?” he asked, in forced casualness.

Hiding a secret smile, Annie replied, “Oh, she’s around somewhere.  Why don’t you come sit down.  Supper’ll be ready soon.”

Nodding his head, Joe suddenly turned as Jenny entered the room from the kitchen, holding an armload of plates.  Setting the dinnerware on the table, she turned her head, glancing at the new arrival.  “Oh, hello, Joe,” she said, nodding acknowledgement to him.  She was just about to turn back to the kitchen for more dinnerware when Joe suddenly stepped in her direction, removing his hat with one hand, the bouquet of flowers in the other.

“Hi…hi, Jenny,” he stammered.  “I…I brought these for you,” he added, awkwardly holding out the flowers.

Looking up in surprise, Jenny felt a blush creep into her cheeks.  Flowers?  He’d brought her flowers?  Peeking up under her lashes at the others who suddenly seemed preoccupied as they focussed their attention on tasks before them, Jenny stammered in reply, “For-for me?”  At Joe’s nod, she reached out to take the small bouquet of yellow roses.  “Joe, they’re lovely.  Thank you,” she said, peeking again at the others, wondering if they were listening to the exchange.  They didn’t appear to be…Hoss had moved back to settee, engrossed in a game of checkers with his father as they both leaned forward towards the low table and Annie had her head bent over the needlework in her lap.  “I’ll put them in some water,” Jenny said, taking a step or two backwards, before turning from the room.

Watching as Jenny disappeared from the room, Joe turned back towards the others in the great room, fingering his hat in his hands as he stared off into space, a faraway expression on his face.  As the three others exchanged looks of mild amusement, Ben turned to Joe to say, “Joe, why don’t you put your hat and gun there by the door and come on in and sit down.”

“Oh…oh, right,” Joe acknowledged the instructions, jolting from his preoccupation as he went to do as instructed, as the others shared another look of amusement.

************

Hearing a noise at the door as she stood in the kitchen washing up the dinner dishes later that night, Jenny turned from her task, seeing Joe Cartwright at the threshold. 

“Joe!” she said in surprise, running her hands down the apron fastened snuggly around her waist.  “Did you want something, Joe?” she enquired, wondering at the way he hovered in the door frame.

Drinking in the sight of his wife halted from her domestic endeavour, Joe swallowed hard.  “Uh…uh…I was wondering if there was any coffee left,” Joe improvised an excuse for coming into the kitchen. 

“Why sure there is,” Jenny answered, moving quickly to the stove.  “It’ll just take a minute to heat up,” she informed him, moving to place the coffee pot onto the stove as Joe came further into the room.  As Jenny turned from the stove, their eyes met and Jenny felt a blush creep up her face to stain her cheeks a bright pink.  This was silly, she chided herself.  Getting all flustered, like a schoolgirl with her first beau.  Moving back to the sink, she immersed her hands into the water, continuing with her task.

“Here, let me help you with that,” Joe offered, picking up a towel and beginning to dry the dishes as she washed.

“Joe!” Jenny exclaimed in surprise.  “Joe, you don’t have to do that!  It’s my job.”

“What?” Joe pretended to be affronted.  “Somebody actually turning down my offer of assistance?” he teased, shaking his head.  “Surely you don’t mean to hurt my feelings?” he winked at her.

Giggling, Jenny conceded, “Well, I guess I could use the help.  I don’t wanna hurt your feelings.”

“Good,” Joe acknowledged, a pleased smile on his face as they both directed their attention to the task at hand.

A few minutes passing in companionable silence, Joe stole a glance or two at his wife.  How lovely she looked, how lovely she always looked, but especially now.  The way her dress clung to her small frame, the crisp white linen of the apron outlining the gentle curve of her hips, the bountiful glory of her blond hair hanging loose down her back, the sides held back with a simple ribbon at the back of her head.  And the pink flush on her face as she worked over the sink.  Was she flushed from the work or had he put that blush there? he wondered.

Turning to Joe to hand him the next plate, Jenny inhaled sharply as she met his eyes and read something there before it was quickly masked.  Startled, the plate dropped from her hand, landing loudly on the floor but not breaking.  “Oh!  How clumsy of me!” she exclaimed, stooping to retrieve the dinnerware just as Joe did the same.  Butting heads as they bent, both of them came back up, laughing as they held a hand to their injured craniums.  “I’m sorry, Joe,” Jenny laughed up at him, her eyes sparkling merrily. 

“No, it was my fault,” he apologized laughingly back.  Continuing to stare at each other, the laughter slowly dying on their lips, Joe suddenly reached out and pulled her to him, his hands spanning her waist as he brought her close, her arms bent up before her, pressing against his chest.

Her eyes widening in alarm at the sudden intimacy, Jenny prompted, “Joe?”

Swallowing hard, Joe stared down at his wife as she looked up at him, a questioning look on her face.  God, he thought, how much was he supposed to bear?  He was a man after all, a man in love with his wife, desperate to touch her, for her to touch him.  Groaning in defeat as any shred of self-control evaporated as the nearness of his wife filled his ravenous senses, Joe lowered his head, capturing her lips with his, as he snaked his arms tightly about her.

Frozen in surprise, a small cry escaping from her lips, Jenny was stunned into submission.  What was Joe doing?  Well, she knew what he was doing, but why?  Fighting the allure of the heady kiss, Jenny tried to pull away, finding her attempt met with the resistance of Joe’s arms as he refused to release her, his mouth raking across hers as the kiss intensified.  Feeling helpless now as his plundering kiss assaulted her senses, Jenny began to fight in earnest, pushing against his shoulders as she struggled in an attempt to break free.

Her soft body in his arms, her soft lips to his as he kissed her, it took a moment for his wife’s struggles to finally register in Joe’s passion-filled brain.  Loosening his grip, a concession to the small measure of rational thought that had returned, he immediately berated himself for loosing control. 

Feeling his arms slacken about her, Jenny pushed herself away, stepping backwards out of his arms and raising a hand to connect sharply with his face. 

The stinging blow reverberating in the silence, Jenny brought her hand to her mouth as her eyes widened in horror.  What had she done?  She’d slapped him.  And hard.  She’d slapped him with every ounce of strength she’d had in her.  Suddenly panicked, she turned and bolted from the room.

“Jenny!” Joe called after her, following quickly on her heels, the pain of the blow quickly replaced by concern for his wife. 

Lifting her skirts as she ran, Jenny bolted through the great room towards the stairs, as Annie and Hoss, alone in the room after Ben had left for his evening walk, looked up in startled surprise.  “Jenny?” Annie called, rising to her feet, alarmed that Jenny didn’t slow but raced past her up the stairs.

Following behind his wife, Joe stopped at the bottom of the stairs, worry on his face as he watched his wife disappear up the stairs.  Raking a shaky hand through his hair, he turned in agitation to Annie, blinking furiously as he implored, “See that she’s okay.  Please.  See that she’s okay.”

Seeing the seriousness of the situation, Annie headed quickly past him up the stairs, as Joe averted his eyes from Hoss’s questioning glance.

Coming up to Jenny’s bedroom door, Annie rapped softly and nudged the open door wider, spotting Jenny sitting on the edge of the bed, her head bent and her arms clutched around her stomach as if she were in pain.  “Jenny!” Annie exclaimed, quickly coming to her side to sit beside her.  “Jenny, are you alright?  Are you in pain?” she asked worriedly.

Shaking her head as she brushed off the question, Jenny blurted instead, “Are you gonna fire me?”

“What?” Annie asked, stunned by the question.

“Are you gonna fire me?” Jenny repeated, looking up to meet Annie’s eyes, her own filled with desperation and fear.

Annie inhaled sharply at the look in Jenny’s eyes.  She knew that look, recognized herself in that look.  All those years when she’d been on her own, always afraid.  Afraid of losing her job, the fear of not knowing if she was safe.  Is that what Jenny was feeling now?  But why would she think they would fire her?  Hadn’t she done her best to make her feel safe and secure?  “Jenny, no one is firing anybody,” Annie reassured her, her voice firm.  “Now what is all this about?”

Blinking as she tried to hold back her tears, Jenny confessed in a small voice, “I hit him.  I hit Joe.”

“What?” Annie asked, incredulous.

The words tumbling out in panicked agitation, Jenny cried, “I was frightened.  He frightened me.  I didn’t mean to hurt him.  Please…please don’t fire me.”

Reaching out, Annie clasped Jenny by the arms, shaking her gently.  “Jenny, I already told you.  No one is firing anybody,” she reassured her again, confused by Jenny’s words.  Joe frightened her?  “What happened, Jenny?  How did Joe frighten you?” she probed.

“He…h-he kissed me,” Jenny stammered in a shaky voice, dropping her eyes, “and he wouldn’t stop and it scared me and I…..,” 

“He kissed…..,” Annie trailed off, sucking in her breath, her expression suddenly grim. 

“I’m sorry, Annie,” Jenny choked out, shaking her head.  “I know I shouldn’t have hit him….,” she agonized, appalled at her actions.

Shaking Jenny by the arms again, Annie said, “Jenny, you ain’t got nothing to be sorry about.  If anyone should be sorry, it’s Joe.  Now I don’t want you worrying anymore about it, y’hear me?”  At Jenny’s silence, Annie shook her again, “I said, y’hear me?”

Looking up, Jenny met Annie’s eyes to nod silently at her. 

“Good.  Now it’s getting late and you’d better turn in,” Annie admonished, patting Jenny’s knee before rising from the bed and moving to the door.  Turning at the threshold, she called gently, “Good night, Jenny.”

“Good night, Annie,” Jenny replied in relief, running the back of her hand along the corner of her eye.

Turning, Annie left the room, pulling the door closed behind her, her eyes darkening ominously as she headed back down the stairs.

Seeing his sister-in-law coming down the stairs, Joe rose from his perch on the arm of the settee, worry on his face.  “How is she?  Is she alright?” he blurted the questions before Annie’d reached the bottom.

Not answering, Annie came the rest of the way down the stairs, pulling up to a stop in front of her brother-in-law, fire darting angrily from the depths of her eyes.  “Yes, she’s alright,” she ground out, her gaze fierce upon her brother-in-law.  “If by alright you mean frightened out of her wits and worried about losing her job and close to tears because she thought she’d done something wrong.  If that’s what you mean by ‘alright’ then I guess she’s alright, Joe.”

“Oh,” Joe replied inadequately, looking guiltily down for a second before looking back up, the apple of his throat bobbing erratically.  “Can…can I see her for minute?  Tell her I’m sorry?” he begged.

“No,”Annie coldly replied.  “You can’t see her.  I want you to leave.”

“Annie!” Hoss interjected in surprise.  What was she doing?  Was she throwing his brother out of the house?

“Hoss, I know he’s yer brother but Jenny’s my sister and I ain’t having her treated this way.  Not by no one,” Annie added meaningfully, turning back to Joe.  “So I’ll say it again.  I want you to leave this house,” she ground out.  Crossing her arms as she stood resolutely before him, she eyed him coldly to hiss in disgust, “I’m ashamed of ya.”

“Annie!” Hoss exclaimed again.

“No, Hoss,” Joe interrupted, eyeing his sister-in-law’s unyielding stance.  “Annie’s right,” he conceded, owning up to his mistake as he swallowed hard.  Dropping his head, he turned towards the door, reaching for his hat sitting on the bureau.  Pausing a moment as he fingered his hat in his hands, he turned back, his voice hesitant as he asked, “Annie, if I give you my word not to…if I give you my word, can I come back?”

“I don’t know, Joe.  I’ll have to think about it,” Annie replied gruffly, her meaning clear.  Little Joe had lost her respect and it wouldn’t be an easy task to win it back.

Nodding his head in understanding, Joe turned, retrieving his gunbelt before pulling open the open and going quietly into the night.
Chapter 20
**********

Jenny stopped and looked around her in confusion, trying to make out a familiar landmark.  She’d only wandered away from the creek at the back of the house for a few moments, admiring the lovely pastoral setting of her new environment and now suddenly nothing looked familiar.  Was the creek back that way or up ahead? she wondered, her sense of direction failing her.  Turning 360 degrees, she surveyed the landscape in apprehension.  Lost.  She was lost, she suddenly realized, there was no denying it.  Sighing, she guessed what she hoped was the right direction and pushed on.

An hour later, tired, hot and dusty, she moved to a nearby boulder, sitting down to rest a moment.  This was bad.  This was definitely bad, she admitted to herself.  She’d been walking for a long time and was no closer to the ranch house or even anything that looked familiar to her.  Trying to curb her rising sense of panic, Jenny took several deep breaths.  It would be alright, she told herself.  There was plenty of time left till night fell and the others would come looking for her once they realized she had disappeared.  No need to panic at all, she reasoned, as her brow none-the-less knotted in worry. 

Resting another few moments, Jenny made to rise, suddenly spotting a flurry of motion from the corner of her eye.  Turning she saw a rider fast approaching in her direction.  Heaving a sigh of relief, she watched as the distant figure of horse and rider grew steadily closer. 

Riding along the ridge a few moments earlier, Joe was startled to note the flash of yellow off in the distance.  Narrowing his eyes on the unexpected splotch of colour on the horizon he suddenly made out the form of a woman.  What was a woman doing way out here in the middle of nowhere? he wondered, turning his horse and moving toward the solitary figure.  Drawing closer, Joe inhaled to realize the yellow dress he’d seen was topped by pale blond hair.  Recognizing his wife, Joe urged his horse Cochise faster.  What was Jenny doing out here in the middle of nowhere?  And by herself?  It was plain to see no one else was nearby, no horses, no carriage.

Pulling up sharply in front of her, Joe dismounted posthaste, taking several long strides towards his wife, before reaching out to clasp her by the arms.  “Jenny, what’s wrong?” he asked urgently.  “What are you doing out here?” he demanded.

Alarmed by the intensity of Joe’s expression, Jenny nervously eyed him back.  She hadn’t seen Joe in two days, not since…not since he’d kissed her in the kitchen of the ranch house.  Eyeing him warily, she stammered, “No-nothing’s wrong.  I got lost, is all.”

“Got lost is all!!” Joe exclaimed in astonishment.  Didn’t she know?  Didn’t she realize what ‘getting lost’ out here meant?  “Jenny….” he began, thinking to tell her.

“So if you’ll just point me back in the right direction, I’ll head home now,” she interrupted, suddenly uneasy, the memory of the encounter in the kitchen all too fresh in her mind as she pulled out of his grasp, stepping cautiously away from him.  He wouldn’t…he wouldn’t….would he?  After all, they were alone out here in the middle of nowhere.

Seeing her mistrust, Joe was disheartened, not liking what he saw in his wife’s eyes.  She was afraid.  Of him.  Ignoring the swift tear to his heart that that piece of information caused, Joe calmly reasoned, “Jenny, it’s a long way back to the house.  You can’t walk all that way.”

“No, really, I’m fine,” Jenny countered.  “Just tell me the way….”

Breathing hard at her stubborness, his temper flared as Joe ordered, “Jenny, you’re not walking all that way.  Now get on my horse!”

“No, Joe,” Jenny shook her head, licking her lips nervously as she began to sidle away from him.  “I can walk….”

“Jenny!” Joe exclaimed at his wife’s illogical insistence, reaching a hand out to her arm to forestall her.

Her eyes widening in alarm at his action, Jenny cried out, “Let me go!” as she tried to stiffle the feeling of rising panic.

Immediately releasing her from his grip, Joe was contrite as he pleaded plaintively, “Jenny…Jenny, don’t look at me like that,” no longer able to bear it, no longer able to bear her apprehension in his presence.  At her silence to his plea, Joe continued, “Jenny, I won’t hurt you.  I’d never hurt you.  You have to believe that.”

Her colour rising at his statement — had he read her so well, then? — Jenny countered, “I…I trust you, Joe,” the stammer betraying the lie.  “I just don’t want to ride, thank you,” she ended primly.

“Jenny….”

“JOE!” Jenny exclaimed sharply, suddenly spotting a snake slithering through the grass behind him, near his untethered horse, the horse whinnying in agitation as the snake rose, positioning itself to strike.  Turning quickly, Joe spotted the source of his wife’s and horse’s alarm, quickly drawing and firing a fatal shot on the deadly predator.  The loud gunshot frightening the already nervous horse, Cochise bolted, leaving Joe and Jenny staring helplessly after him.

“Joe, your horse!” Jenny was immediately sympathetic at the loss of his mount.

Shaking his head, Joe observed as he reholstered his gun, “Don’t worry, he’ll head home soon enough.”  Turning to look at Jenny, he added, “Besides, it’s not the horse I’m worried about.”

Blushing at his reference — was he worried about her, then? — Jenny observed, “Well, it looks like we’ll both be walking.”

Nodding his head in agreement, Joe held his arm out, ushering the way, “After you,” as Jenny moved past him, arcing around him as she proceeded in the indicated direction as Joe sighed at the wide berth she was giving him before he turned to follow.

Walking silently side-by-side a short time, Jenny slowed, finally coming to a halt as Joe, now a few paces ahead, turned back to her, an enquiring look on his face.  “Joe…could we…could we rest for a minute?” she asked, hesitant and apologetic with the question.  She hated to ask, they’d only gone a short distance but she was tired, so tired, from all the walking she’d already done.  At least she assumed it was because of the walking, maybe it just because…because she always tired lately, it seemed.  Something Dr. Martin had told her to expect.

“Jenny, of course!” Joe was immediately solicitous.  Why hadn’t he thought to ask her earlier if she need to rest? he berated himself.

Moving to a nearby tree log, Jenny settled herself down, letting out a little sigh of relief.  Bending a leg across her other knee, she reached down, massaging her aching foot through her high-topped button-down shoe.

Watching her from a distance, Joe approached closer to ask, “Why do women wear such impractical shoes anyway?” the question always puzzling him.

Looking up, Jenny met his eyes, her brow raised sardonically as she replied, “Probably because it’s men who are designing their shoes.”

Laughing out loud at his wife’s observation, Joe teased back, “I should have known we’d get blamed for this somehow,” as the two exchanged amused smiles.  Suddenly becoming serious, Joe suggested, worried about her, “Look, Jenny.  Why don’t you wait here and I’ll head back alone.  It won’t take me long to come back with another horse.”

For some reason not wanting to be left behind on her own, a strange about-face considering her earlier stance, Jenny immediately sprang to her feet, thinking he wanted to leave her because she was dawdling.  “No, Joe.  I’m ready to go now,” she announced, moving away but stumbling in her haste.  Quickly reaching out to steady her, it only took Joe another second before he acted on instinct and impulse, stooping slightly to scoop her up into his arms, her voluminous skirts pouffing with the motion before settling to drap gracefully at the front. 

“Joe!” Jenny exclaimed in surprise, as he held her in his arms and began moving forward, his intention obvious but baffling.  Surely he didn’t mean to carry her home? Jenny pondered the development.

“Be quiet, Jenny,” Joe ordered, in a voice close to a growl.  He’d had enough.  Enough of her fear, her stubborn insistence on walking, her refusal of his help.

“Joe, you can’t carry me!” Jenny protested, even as he did so.  “I’m…I’m too heavy.”

A smile tugged the corners of Joe’s mouth at that lame rationale. “Jenny, you hardly weigh anything at all.  Now be quiet and enjoy the scenery,” he commanded.  Sensing her eyes on his face as he stared ahead, Joe corrected teasingly, “Not that scenery,” as Jenny giggled.  She’d been staring at him, trying to figure him out, wondering why she wasn’t afraid anymore, not knowing why she trusted him, only knowing she did.  Doing as commanded, Jenny reached an arm up around his neck, turning her head slightly to watch the passing scenery.

************

Racing out of the ranch house, Annie came up to the pair just as Joe stopped, setting Jenny on her feet in the courtyard.  “And just where have you two been?” Annie demanded of her brother-in-law, eyeing him angrily as she folded her arms in front of her, giving all the appearance of a Mama Bear protecting her cub.  Hoss and his father were already out looking for Jenny and she’d been alone at the house, worrying herself silly.  And now here was Joe, carrying Jenny in his arms, after Annie’d already told him to leave the house once.  If he…if he even….she didn’t finish the thought as she stiffened in outrage, ready to do battle.

Seeing Annie’s outrage, Jenny laid a hand on the woman’s arm.  “No, Annie,” she said, shaking her head to the woman’s silent accusation as she stared at her brother-in-law.  “Joe…Joe was a perfect gentleman,” Jenny informed her, her meaning clear.  “I got lost and he brought me home,” she explained.  The information subduing Annie for a moment, Jenny turned to Joe.  “Thank you, Joe.  Thank you for bringing me home,” she shyly spoke her gratitude, offering a small smile with her thanks.

Nodding to her, a reciprocating smile on his face, Joe replied, “You’re welcome, Jenny.  Now you go on inside and get some rest, you hear?”

Her smile widening at his concern, Jenny promised, “I will, Joe.  Goodbye.”  Turning, she headed towards the house.

Watching her for a moment until she disappeared inside, Joe then turned to Annie, still standing before him.  “Well, I’d better go,” he said, turning away, as Annie watched him, her eyes narrowed on him, sizing up the events and coming to a decision.

“You…you may as well come to supper tomorrow night,” she suddenly called out the invitation to his back.  “We allus got plenty,” she reinforced her words gruffly.

Surprised, Joe turned back to look his sister-in-law in the eye.  Seeing something there, maybe begrudging respect, he wasn’t sure, he nodded to her, pleased with the  unexpected development.  “Thank you, Annie.  I’ll be sure and do that,” he told her, smiling as he turned away towards the barn, needing to borrow a horse for the ride home.
Chapter 21
**********

Hiding behind the blue plush chair in the great room, down on her knees, Jenny held a finger to her lips and shushed the little boy.  “Be real quiet now, Buck,” she intructed conspiratorially on a whisper. “He won’t find us if we’re quiet,” she said, as the small boy crouched low beside her, hanging on her every word.

Coming into the room on tiptoe, Joe mulled aloud in false wonder as he pretended to look about him, “Now where did those two go?”  Moving to the dining room table, he peered underneath.  “Hmm.  They’re not under the table,” he mused aloud, a twinkle in his eye.  “Guess I’ll just keep looking.”  Moving stealthily into the great room, he lifted a pillow from the settee.  “Hmm.  They’re not under the pillow.  I wonder where they could be?”  Pretending to check a few other hiding places, Joe suddenly announced, “Whew!  This is tiring.  I think I need to sit down.  I think I’ll sit in this big comfy chair right here.”  A second after he settled into the seat, a loud squeal ripped the air behind him.  “What!?” Joe pretended to jolt in fright, arms and legs flailing.  Peering around the back of the chair, Joe exclaimed, “What are you two doing back there?!?” as Buck laughed, delighted with the game.

“Run, Buck!” Jenny urged, seeing the gig was up.  The small child bolting past the chair towards the kitchen, Jenny followed, the two racing out of the room.  Springing from the chair, Joe raced after them, a grin on his face.  Reaching the safety of the kitchen, Jenny turned laughingly back to Joe, close on her heels.  “We won, Joe!”

“What?” Joe cried in mock outrage.  Coming closer, he lifted his nephew into his arms.  “And who’s idea was it to hide on me?” he asked the child accusingly.

In genuine innocence, Buck answered with the truth, pointing out the offender, “Jenny.”

“What?” Jenny exclaimed at the seemingly traitorous accusation.

“Uh-huh,” Joe replied, nodding his head knowingly, “just as I thought,” as he cast Jenny a look of mock disdain.

Biting her lip a little as she tried not to laugh, Jenny announced, “Well, I think it’s Buck’s bedtime anyway.  Annie said to put him down at seven and it’s past that already.”

Turning to the child in his arms, Joe sighed, “We’d better do as she says, Buck.  You know what she’s like when she’s angry.”

“Joe!” Jenny laughingly protested, reaching out to whack him playfully on the arm. 

Brushing past her, Joe grinned to the child in his arms, “See what I mean?” as he continued out of the room, Jenny laughing as she followed behind.

Up in the bedroom a short time later, Joe and Jenny stood side-by-side as they surveyed the sight before them, befuddled expressions on their faces as squeals of delighted toddler laughter rang out in the room.

“What do you think we should do?” Joe leaned over to ask, not taking his eyes from the mystifying sight before him.

“I dunno.  Maybe he’ll just stop on his own,” Jenny offered, also eyeing the source of their bewilderment.

A moment later, as peels of boisterous laughter continued to ring throughout the room, Joe shook his head at the spectacle before him, leaning over again to remark, “I don’t think he’s going to stop.  Maybe we should do something.”

“Like what?” Jenny asked in bafflement.

“Well,” Joe hesitated.  “If you grabbed his arms and I grabbed his feet….,” he trailed off the suggestion.

Nodding, Jenny concurred, “Okay, but we have to do it at the same time or it won’t work.”

“Okay, on the count of three,” Joe formulated the plan.  “One…two….THREE!” Rushing to the bed upon which Buck was jubilantly and exuberantly jumping up and down, Jenny grabbed the child’s arms as Joe grabbed his legs, stopping the child in mid-jump.  “Hey, it worked!” Joe exclaimed, delighted at the outcome as between them they held the child face up in the air, hung between them like a hammock, Buck laughing delightedly at the new game.

“Now what?” Jenny asked, looking up at Joe as she awaited his next instructions.

“What do you mean, now what?” Joe demanded.  “I got us this far.  You think of something.”

Quickly surveying the situation, Jenny commanded, “You come this way so his head’s at that end.”  Executing her orders, Joe and Jenny switched places, completing a half-circle.  “Okay, now swing him onto the bed.  No wait!” she said, releasing one of the child’s arms to reach over and brush back the blankets on the bed, the child tilting precariously in the air before Jenny righted him again.  “Okay, NOW!” she ordered, as Joe and Jenny simultaneously swung the child into place on the bed.  Quickly reaching over, Jenny pulled the blankets over him, quickly moving to sit beside him and pinning the blankets across his chest to hold him down.  “Get his bear, Joe!” she ordered urgently.

“His what?” Joe squeaked.

“His bear, his bear,” Jenny answered impatiently, looking over her shoulder. “The stuffed bear over on the bureau,” she directed as Joe quickly moved to fulfill her request, bringing the small soft toy over and holding it out to her.  Taking it, Jenny tucked it in beside the child.

“There now,” she said, smoothing the blankets over the pair, her voice softening as she addressed the child.  “It’s time for Buck and Bear to go to sleep.  And when you wake up in the morning it’ll be a brand new day,” she breathed softly to the child.  Settling down at her soothing words, Buck stared back at Jenny, a soft yawn escaping from his mouth.  “Hey, Joe!” Jenny turned her head slightly to whisper in a hushed voice.  “I think he yawned.”

Crouching down beside the pair, Joe looked from his nephew back to Jenny.  “That’s a good sign, isn’t it?” he whispered back.

Nodding, Jenny turned back to the child, reaching a hand out to brush a wisp of sandy-coloured hair across his forehead as the child blinked sleepily in response, moving to suck on his thumb. 

“I guess we should go,” Joe breathed the suggestion over to Jenny as she nodded back, moving to rise from the bed when suddenly Buck pulled his thumb from his mouth to call out, “No!” in childlike distress.

“Hey!” Jenny soothed, immediately settling back onto the bed.  “It’s okay.  Do you want us to stay a little longer?” she asked tenderly as the child nodded solemnly.  “Well, okay, but just for a little while.  How about I sing you a song?” she asked on a whisper.  As the child nodded and moved to suck on his thumb again, Jenny began, her voice soft and clear and true as she slowly sang.

Flow gently, sweet Afton,
Among thy green braes,
Flow gently, I’ll sing thee
a song in thy praise

My Mary’s asleep
by thy murmuring stream,
Flow gently, sweet Afton,
disturb not her dream……
Watching his wife from his crouched position as she sang to the small boy, the child’s eyes drooping sleepily as she sang, Joe felt his heart swell with tenderness.  He watched her, mesmerized by her sweet soft voice, afraid to move for fear of breaking her wondrous spell, radiating over both him and the child.  He watched her, still softly singing, as she reached a hand out to run tenderly along the child’s face, the soothing strokes the child’s final pull to sweet slumber.

“There,” Jenny breathed quietly at song’s end.  “He’s asleep now,” she whispered the observation, reaching out to gently tug the sleeping child’s thumb from his mouth. Tucking his hand under the blanket, she smoothed the blankets across his shoulders before turning to look at Joe. 

Meeting his wife’s eyes, Joe swallowed hard, reading the loving care for the child still glowing in her eyes.  “Jenny, you’re very sweet,” he whispered to her, unable to help himself, as Jenny blushed a little in response to his words.  Turning her head, she looked back at the child, now a picture of endearing innocence. 

“Sweet?” she contemplated.  “No, Joe,” she disputed, her voice a whisper as she shook her head.  “Buck’s the sweet one.  A sweet little boy,” she tenderly pronounced.  Leaning close she brushed her lips to the child’s forehead, then turned and rose, leaving the room as Joe rose and followed behind.
Chapter 22
**********

As she hung the wash on the line at the back of the house the next afternoon, Jenny looked up, surprised to see a rider approaching.  How strange, she thought, for a rider to approach from this direction.  Not that she’d seen many riders come in to the Ponderosa.  It seems like every time a visitor came, which was not often, the Cartwrights hustled her off to the kitchen, there being a sudden urgent need to rearrange the cutlery.  But it was just herself and Mr. Cartwright home now and Mr. Cartwright was inside.  Not sure if she should summon him or not, Jenny decided on an alternate course.

Stepping towards the rider as he approached, Jenny was startled when he pulled up sharply before her, his voice angry and riled as he said sarcastically, “Well, Jenny girl, if this isn’t a surprise!”

What?  Who was this man?  And how did he know her name? Jenny’s brow wrinkled in puzzlement.  “Can…can I help you?” she stammered.

Ignoring her question, the man continued, his agitation clear as he jerked angily on his horse’s reins, trying to control the prancing animal. “So what is all this?” he demanded to know, staring beligerently down on the woman.  “Some trick to get out of paying me what’s owed to me?”

“E-excuse me?” Jenny stammered.  What was he talking about?   He was making no sense at all to her.  Suddenly uneasy and nervous, she suggested, “Perhaps you want to see Mr. Cartwright.  I’ll go see if I can find him.”

Swiftly dismounting his horse, Earl Talbot strode towards his daughter, reaching out to yank her arm.  “I’ve had about as much as I’m gonna take!” he spat angrily, eyeing her disdainfully from head to toe. “I heard them whispering in town about it but I didn’t believe ’em.  Had to come see with my own eyes.  Did you think you could fool me, Jenny?  Did you think I’d just go quietly away thinking you were dead?”

“Wh-what?” Jenny faltered, trying to pull out the man’s grasp, well and truly panicked now.  This man was insane.

“Let the girl go!” Suddenly a booming voice called out, as Jenny and her stepfather both turned to stare at the man behind them, his body rigid as his hand hovered warningly over his holster.

Quickly pulling his daughter in front of him, Earl Talbot drew his gun, pointing the barrel at his daughter.  “I wouldn’t try nothing seeing how it’s the girl who’ll get hurt,” he threatened.  “Now you don’t wanna see her get hurt, do ya?”

His eyes narrowing on the other man, Ben Cartwright tried to suppress his thoughts, trying to stay alert and focussed on the suddenly serious situation.  What kind of a man was this?  To use his own daughter in such a way?  “I’ll give you whatever you want.  Just let the girl go,” he ground out, his disgust with the man’s actions apparent.

“Well, what I want is fi…ten thousand dollars,” Earl Talbot quickly adjusted the amount of his demand to a higher sum.  “Now just drop yer gun down on the ground,” he demanded, pressing the tip of his own gun to his daughter’s temple as Jenny swallowed nervously at the touch of the cool metal against her skin.  Feeling a strange sort of impotent fury rise inside him, Ben threw his gun down on the ground, his revulsion for the other man radiating in his body language.  “Now where’s the money?” Earl Talbot demanded.

“In the house.  In the strongbox on my desk,” Ben ground out.

Turning the gun away from his daughter, Earl Talbot waved it in the air, jerking it towards the house.  “Okay, let’s go,” he directed, moving towards the house, pulling Jenny along with him as she suddenly began to resist, squriming in his arms.  This wasn’t right, Jenny rebelled.  Why should Mr. Cartwright give this man all that money?  And for her?  Why, she was nothing to him, just the hired girl.  “Come along, girl!” Earl Talbot angrily shouted, annoyed at his daughter’s resistance as he jerked her arm forcefully, Jenny crying out in pain.

At his daughter-in-law’s cry of pain, Ben lunged towards the man.  At the sudden motion, Earl Talbot turned his gun on the man, cocking the pistol and firing rapidly.   The shot grazing Ben’s left temple, he stumbled backwards with the force of the shot, landing on the ground near the woodpile, blood trickling from the superficial wound to his head.

“PA!” 

The terrified scream had come from Jenny, her cry directed at the man sprawled in the dirt as, struggling, she broke free from her stepfather’s grip and raced to Ben’s side, kneeling close beside him.  “Pa…Pa, are you alright?” she asked desperately, distress written on her face, the solitary memory of the man’s identity triggered by her worry and concern, just as a sudden stream of other memories came flooding back close behind it.

“Jenny?” Ben stared at his daughter-in-law, more stunned by what she’d called him, what he was just now hearing for the first time ever from her, than he was by the wound to his head. 

“Tie his wrists and ankles,” Earl Talbot barked the order to Jenny from his place across from them.  “Do as I tell ya, girl!” Earl Talbot ordered, as Jenny turned to stare blankly at the man she now knew was her stepfather as he motioned with his gun to the heavy chain hanging on a peg nearby.  “Or I’ll fire another bullet at him and this time I won’t miss,” her stepfather threatened.

Reluctant to do as ordered, Jenny turned to meet Ben’s eyes.  “It’s alright, Jenny.  Do as he tells you,” he gently said, believing all Earl Talbot wanted was the money and the sooner he got it the sooner they’d be rid of him. 

Watching as his stepdaughter wrapped the heavy iron chain around her father-in-law’s wrists and then down around his ankles, Earl Talbot barked at the completion, “And now the lock.”

Doing as instructed, Jenny looked up to meet Ben’s eyes worriedly as she pressed the lock closed.  Turning her head, she saw Earl Talbot move, heading into the house in search of his loot.

Alone in the yard together, Jenny immediately voiced her concern.  “Are you sure you’re alight?” she asked, eyeing the small stain of blood on the side of face.

“Yes, Jenny, I’m alright,” Ben reassured her as he scanned her face, trying to read her thoughts.  “How are YOU, Jenny?” he asked, wondering and hoping.

“I…I….,” Jenny faltered, shaking her head, the memories still rushing back as she tried to answer him, understanding his question.  Suddenly changing tactics, she informed him, “My…my stepfather was here before.  He told me he wanted five thousand dollars.  I…I didn’t know what to do so I went to see Joe up at the camp and that’s when….when…,” she trailed off, her quick summary of the events proving to Ben that her memory had returned.  As a gunshot sounded inside the house, Jenny jerked nervously. 

“He’s just opening the strongbox,” Ben soothed her.

A small silence greeting that information, Jenny shook her head, remembering something else, the question hesitantly coming to her lips.  “Why…why did you do it?” she asked, wanting to understand.

“Do what, Jenny?”

“Why…why did you give him all that money before?” she asked, referring to the first time Ben Cartwright had paid off her father with an enormous sum, wondering what would possess a man to hand over thousands of dollars like that, willingly.  This time there’d been no choice but not the first time.  He’d had a choice then.

“Why, Jenny, don’t you know?” Ben asked, surprised by her question and then moving to set her straight on the issue when Jenny shook her head to his question.  “Jenny, I’d do anything for my daughter,” Ben informed her, his voice tender and caring.

Her chin trembling at this piece of information, Jenny’s face suddenly crumpled as she burst into tears, dropping her head at his unexpected answer.  Daughter?  She was his daughter?  Didn’t he mean daughter-in-law? 

“Hey!” Ben exclaimed tenderly in reaction to her tears as he reached his co-joined hands out to touch her arm.  “I didn’t mean to make my girl cry,” he protested. 

My girl?  Jenny looked up to meet his eyes, the words repeating in her mind, his claim of ownership, that she somehow belonged to him, or with him, overwhelming her.  She’d been called ‘girl’ her whole life by a man who claimed to be a father to her, but she’d never been called ‘my girl’ and never with such love and caring.  Crying even harder now, she leaned forward and flung her arms around Ben’s neck, burying her face in the crook there as she sobbed her gratitude.  Grateful that for the first time in her life she knew what a father’s love was, a true father’s love.  His love.  Booming voice and all.  Pulling back a little, she sniffled, looking up to meet his eyes.

“I love you, Pa,” she said simply.

“I love you, Jenny,” Ben answered, smiling tenderly as Jenny responded with a watery smile.

Hearing the gunshot in the distance as he rode his horse along the path a few minutes earlier, Little Joe’s eyes turned worriedly towards the Ponderosa, instinctively sensing trouble at the unexpected noise.  Turning off the path, he urged his horse in the direction of the ranch house, approaching from the south side.  Alarmed to hear another shot — muffled, but a shot none-the-less — a few moments later, he dug his heels into Cochise’s side, spurring him to an all-out run.  Coming up to the back of the ranch house, he skidded to a stop, throwing himself off his horse as he raced to the two people sprawled on the ground.  “Jenny!  Pa!” he exclaimed in worry, crouching beside them.

“We’re alright, Joe,” Ben quickly informed him, apprising him of the situation.  “Jenny’s father is in the house,” he blurted the information in warning.

“Jenny’s father….?” Joe breathlessly repeated the information, stunned at both the information and the fact that Ben had said it in front of Jenny.  Did that mean Jenny knew…?  Did that mean she remembered?  Looking to his wife, Joe’s eyes were wide in astonishment.  “Jenny?”

“Yes, Joe, I remember,” she nodded to him as Joe’s expression turned to one of elated amazement.  Forestalling further discussion on her state of being and knowing the urgency of the situation, Jenny continued in a rush, “Joe, my father’s in the house….”

Suddenly, Earl Talbot appeared at the threshold of the back door, a gun in one hand, a loaded sack in the other.  It was obvious his looting was not confined to mere cash, the shape of the sack hinting at the pricey trinkets inside.

“Joe!” Jenny cried in warning, spotting her stepfather, as Joe pivoted in his crouched position, his reflexes slowed by the shocking news of his wife’s restored memory as he reached a hand to his holster.

Seeing a new Cartwright on the scene ready to thwart his escape, Earl Talbot raised his gun, firing a direct shot at the young man’s chest, the force of the blast throwing Joe onto his back on the ground.  Letting out a scream, Jenny flung herself next to the prostate form, now eerily still and silent as Ben roared and jerked in impotent rage, pulling futilely on the constraining chains.  Suddenly aware that he had now in all likelihood committed murder — no one could survive such a direct hit so close to their heart — Earl Talbot crossed the threshold from human being to unspeakable monster, deciding he would have to silence them all, leaving no witnesses to his hangable crime.  As a soft moan eminated from the prone form, he raised his gun, intending to finish off what he’d begun.

Turning in time to see her stepfather’s deadly intent, Jenny cried out, “NO!” and bolted for Ben’s gun, still lying in the dirt some distance away.  His aim hindered by the woman in his path, Earl Talbot turned the gun on her instead, his shot missing the moving target as she rolled onto the ground, turning side-over-side until she reached the gun.  Laying flat on her stomach, she grabbed the gun in her hand, raising the barrel towards her father with one hand, cocking the gun rapidly with the palm of the other and unhesitatingly pulled the trigger.  Her true aim piercing the man’s flesh, Earl Talbot jerked with the force of the gunfire, dropping his gun and the sack before sinking lifelessly to the ground.  Sparing him not another glance, Jenny dropped the gun in her hand, scrambling from the ground to rush back to her husband and father-in-law. 
Chapter 23
**********

“He’ll be fine, Ben,” Doc Martin told Joe’s worried father as they stood downstairs in the great room of the ranch house, the rest of the family hovering close by.  “The medallion he was wearing stopped the bullet.  Oh, he’ll be sore for a bit and they’ll be some bad bruising for a while but other than that he’s fine,” the doctor reassured him as Ben exhaled slowly in relief, a small bandage near his temple covering his own wound.  Shaking his head at the coincidence, the doctor muttered, almost to himself, “A lucky thing he had that medallion on.  It saved his life.”

Looking sharply at the doctor, Ben was quick with the correction, “No, Paul.  The medallion didn’t save his life.  Jenny did.”

Meeting his friend’s eyes, Paul Martin nodded his head in concession.  “She’s a fine girl, Ben.”

“Yes, she is,” Ben said, the short sentence conveying so much more in its meaning.

“I’m glad everything worked out and her memory’s returned.  It’s strange how the mind works,” the doctor mused, shaking his head.  “I wonder if medical science will ever truly understand just how the brain functions,” the doctor ruminated before turning his attention back to Ben.  “Why don’t you go on up and see Little Joe now?” he suggested.

“No, not yet,” Ben shook his head.  “I’ll give them a little time together first,” he explained as the doctor nodded in understanding and reached for his hat.

“Well, as I always say, I’ve got other patients to see to,” he joked as Ben moved forward, seeing his friend out the door.

Inside the bedroom, Jenny moved to sit gingerly on the bed beside her husband who was propped on the pillows.  “How are you, Joe?” she asked, wanting his reassurance in addition to the doctor’s.

“Jenny, I’m fine,” Joe reassured her, immediately discounting his own injuries and enquiring after her.  “Are you alright, Jenny?” he asked worriedly.

“Joe, I’m fine,” Jenny nodded her head.

“And…and the baby?” Joe prodded, not yet satisfied.

“We’re both fine, Joe.  Are you sure you’re alright?” she turned the question back on him.

Smiling a little at the banality of the conversation, Joe told her, “I’m fine, Jenny.  You don’t need to look so worried.”

Smiling a little in reply, Jenny looked down at his bare chest, reaching out to push the medallion he still wore aside as she lightly brushed her hand across the skin beneath.  Noting the mark at the center of his chest, she asked, “Does that hurt, Joe?”

Shaking his head, Joe replied, “No, Jenny.  I’m fine, Jenny.  Really,” he reassured her.

Relieved, Jenny smiled as she teased him. “Well, I guess you’ll do anything to get out of wearing that medallion, won’t you?” she asked, reaching over to lift the misshapen object.

His tone serious, Joe replied, “Jenny, I told you I’d never take it off.  And I never will.”

“But Joe!” Jenny protested, looking up to meet his eyes.  “It’s all…all…,” she floundered for the word, looking back at the medallion in her hand and noting its sorry appearance, the force of the bullet having bent it brutally out of shape.  “And you can’t even read the words anymore,” she remarked, as she turned the medallion over and saw that what was once small-engraved print was now just incoherent scratches.

“Jenny, I don’t need to read the words,” Joe told her as she looked up to meet his eyes, her brow raised in puzzlement.  “I have them here, in my heart,” he whispered, reaching for her hand and bringing it palm flat to the left-side of his chest, his own hand atop of hers.  Slowly, he recited the words back to her from memory, a reversal in the address and closing his only change.

Jenny
Have you ever been over a rainbow?
Or walked through fields of gold?
Have you ever soared with eagles?
Or touched a star in heaven?
I have
You’ve taken me there

I love you
Joe
A small hush greeting his conclusion, their eyes still locked, Jenny finally whispered breathlessly, “Oh, Joe,” and leaned in to brush her lips to his, her touch featherlight as she pressed her mouth softly to his.  Not moving nor taking her in his arms, Joe closed his eyes and let her kiss him, revelling in the tender attention, the first time she had come to him like this in a long time, too long a time.  Her lips straying from his to press gentle kisses to his face, Joe used the parting to whisper an endearment before his wife’s lips came back to his.

“My sweet Jenny.”

Chapter 24
**********

Joe and Jenny were lying side-by-side on their backs on the sweet-smelling grass shaded by the overhead tree, their heads close together.  “That one there,” she said, pointing to the sky.  “That one looks like an elephant,” she rendered her opinion.  “Now it’s your turn,” she prompted her husband, nudging her elbow into his side.

“Hmm,” Joe answered lazily, searching the blue sky.  Finally settling on his choice, he pointed, “That one there.  It’s a wild horse.”

“A horse?” Jenny countered, disbelievingly.  “That’s not a horse!  It looks more like a mountain lion.  A horse!” she snickered.

“Hey!” Joe protested.  “I let you get away with ‘elephant’.  You didn’t hear me complaining it doesn’t look anything like an elephant.  And it doesn’t you know,” he added knowledgably.

“Joe Cartwright!” Jenny reprimanded.  “It does too look like an elephant,” she set the record straight.  Suddenly feeling a fluttering of movement inside her, she reached over to clasp her husband’s hand, bringing it over to rest on her belly as she kept on talking.  “It looks exactly like an elephant,” she continued, as Joe jerked in surprise at the movement he felt beneath his hand.  “A fluffy white elephant,” she clarified.  “Now try another one,” she instructed, nudging him again.

Swallowing hard, trying to keep his emotions in check, his hand on his wife’s belly as their baby moved beneath his palm, Joe looked back to the sky.  “There.  That one.  It’s a…a…dog,” he ended lamely.

“A dog?” Jenny practically screeched.  “Joe Cartwright, you need to get your eyes checked,” she opined.  “A dog,” she muttered under her breath.  “If that isn’t the….,”

Suddenly Joe turned on his side towards his wife, raising himself on one elbow.  “Be quiet, Jenny,” he commanded.  “Is that….is that the baby?” he asked, swallowing hard as he stared down at his wife’s stomach, still feeling the flickering of movement beneath his hand.  Looking up, he met his wife’s eyes.  Seeing her slight nod of affirmation, he expelled his breath in wonder.  “Well, I’ll be….,” he breathed, running his hand back and forth across her slightly curved abdomen.  Suddenly, impusively, he leaned down, brushing his lips to her stomach as Jenny inhaled sharply at the action.  Straightening back up, Joe met Jenny’s eyes.  “There,” he said.  “The first time I’ve kissed our baby,” he whispered.  Staring intently at her, Joe searched for the words.   “Jenny…I’d like…I’d like to kiss his mother now,” he hesitated with the request.

“Her mother,” Jenny corrected, staring back, a slight blush coming to her face.  “I’ve decided I’m having a girl.  So you can kiss her mo…..,” was all Jenny got out before her husband’s lips came down on hers.  Covering his wife’s mouth with his, Joe slid his arms behind her shoulders, tightening his hold as Jenny raised her arms up about his neck.  The kiss deepening quickly, Joe embraced his wife in his arms, as Jenny returned his passionate kiss, pulling him closer to her.  If he could have pulled away just then, he would have told her.  Told her how much he had missed her, that he felt complete and whole only when they were together.  If she could have pulled away just then, she would have told him.  Told him how good, how right, it felt to be home.  To be here in his arms.

But neither one could pull away.  And so with the gentle breeze rustling through the leaves above them serenading them with its soft song, they told each other their feelings in a different way. 

Without words.
Chapter 25
**********

Many months later…..

Opening the door, Annie beckoned to her brother-in-law, hovering outside.  “You can go on in now, Joe,” she said, watching as he hurried past her into the room.

Stepping into the room, Joe swallowed hard at the sight before him.  His wife lay in bed cooing softly to the small bundle nestled in her arm.  As he crept closer to the pair, Jenny turned her attention to him, a small smile on her face. 

“Come see, Joe,” she breathed the invitation, as he proceeded hesitantly closer.  “Come see your son,” she said, turning to once again gaze upon the child.

“My-my son?” Joe repeated, blinking rapidly as he swallowed hard.  Taking the final step towards the bed, he crouched down low to look upon the child as it yawned delicately.

“Jenny…Jenny…,” Joe began, awe in his voice at the sight of his child, still incredulous, still unbelieving.  “Jenny, how did you do that?” he wondered aloud, his voice hushed, overwhelmed by the miracle before him.

“Look, Joe,” Jenny breathed back to him, her attention on the child.  “Look at his little fingers,” she marvelled, nudging the blanket aside for a better view.  “Five little fingers on each hand.  I counted,” she informed him proudly.

Blinking furiously, Joe reached out a finger to touch his son’s hand, now tightly fisted.  “Really, Jenny?” he asked, awed at the information, as Jenny nodded.  Suddenly the child opened his hand, clutching it into a fist around Joe’s nearby finger.  “Jenny, look!” Joe exclaimed softly, wonderstruck at the action.  “Look what he’s doing!” he exalted, giddy with delight.

Blinking away her tears, Jenny nodded, leaning in to brush a tender kiss to the child’s downy head.  Pulling back, she looked over at Joe, meeting his eyes.  “Thank you, Joe,” she whispered.

“What?” Joe asked in surprise.

“Thank you for giving me a baby, Joe.  Thank you for making us a family,” she whispered. 

“Jenny…Jenny…,” Joe stammered, blinking furiously.  What was she saying?  It was he who should be thanking her, for all she’d had to endure, for all she’d been through, not the other way around.  “Jenny….,” he tried to tell her.

“Shh,” Jenny quieted him, turning once again to gaze on her child as she reached a hand out to run a finger tenderly along the child’s face.  “Isn’t he beautiful, Joe?” she asked on a whisper, only to look up in surprise as Joe reached out, taking her hand in his and bringing it to his face.  She hadn’t let him speak the words but that didn’t stop him from telling her what was in his heart.  Pressing her hand to his face, Joe turned his face into her palm, letting her feel what was in his heart. 

There were tears on her hand.
Chapter 26
**********
It was a few days later when the entire Cartwright clan was cloistered in the small bedroom.  Sitting sideways at the foot of the bed, Hoss Cartwright held his nephew in his arms as soft laughter and conversation filled the air.

“Knowing you two, he’ll probably be climbing trees before he’s walking,” Adam teased from his place leaning by the window.

His remark was met with chuckles of agreement, before Joe piped in.  “Well, I dunno, Adam,” he countered in mock seriousness, looking tenderly over at Jenny from his spot near his wife at the head of the bed.  “Knowing us two, I’d say he’ll be riding before he’s walking,” as more chuckles of agreement filled the air.

Spotting his 3-year old son peeking curiously around the door frame into the room, Hoss Cartwright called out, “Hey, Buck, come on in here and see yer new cousin.”  All eyes centered on the small child as he made his way hesitantly into the room, coming to a stop before his father.  “Now, do you think you could hold him and not drop him if ya sat here next to me?” Hoss posed the question as he eyed his son intently, conveying the importance of the responsibility.  At his son’s solemn nod, Hoss coaxed, “Well, come on up here beside me then,” as the child scrambled onto the bed, sitting sideways next to his father.  Leaning over, Hoss carefully transferred the baby into his son’s arms, his own hands hovering only an inch away.  “Buck,” he began the introductions.  “Buck, this here’s yer cousin…yer cousin…,” he faltered, looking up at Joe.

Seeing the question in his brother’s eyes, Joe looked over at his wife, a silent communication passing between them.  At Jenny’s nod, Joe looked back to his brother to announce proudly, “Benjamin,” as Ben Cartwright, standing by the bureau with his hands in his pockets, suddenly jerked in surprise.  “That is, if you don’t mind, Pa,” Joe added, turning his eyes and his question on his father.  “Jenny picked it out,” Joe informed him.

Turning his startled eyes on his daughter-in-law and seeing her slight nod of affirmation, Ben swallowed this piece of information before stammering ineffectually, “Of…of course I don’t mind.”  His more forceful nature returning a second later, he slid a hand from his pocket to throw his arm in the air, throwing off the ridiculous notion as he boomed, “What do you mean, if I don’t mind?”  His shoulder lifting to repocket his hand, Ben grinned his pleasure as smiles and laughter filled the room.  Puffed with pride, he beamed happily at Jenny as she smiled shyly back.

Listening to the exchange, a smile on his face, Hoss turned back to his son.  “Buck, this here’s yer cousin Benjamin,” he completed the introduction.  Looking up, Hoss met Little Joe’s eyes for a moment.  Slowly winking at his brother, Hoss made a pronouncement, more to Joe than to his son.

“Something tells me you two will be having a lot of fun together.”

THE END