{"id":12097,"date":"2004-08-01T09:12:43","date_gmt":"2004-08-01T13:12:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=12097"},"modified":"2025-02-27T12:09:31","modified_gmt":"2025-02-27T17:09:31","slug":"a-reversal-of-roles-by-debbieb","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=12097","title":{"rendered":"A Reversal of Roles (by DebbieB)"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>Summary:\u00a0\u00a0<\/strong>This time it is Ben who suffers from guilt and who shoulders the blame and Joe who delivers the lecture that relives his father of his burdens.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rated:\u00a0 <\/strong>G (15, 240 words)<strong><br \/>\n<\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>Reversal of Roles<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa, what\u2019s wrong?\u201d questioned Adam.<\/p>\n<p>Ben stopped jabbing at the fire that burned in the fireplace and put the poker back on the iron hook. Slowly he turned to his oldest son, Adam, who stood on the bottom step of the staircase.<\/p>\n<p>Adam could see the weariness and worry that had etched themselves into the hardened lines of his father\u2019s weathered face.<\/p>\n<p>They had both been unable to sleep. Adam had awaken to a strange noise and crept out into the hallway, quietly making his way to the top of the staircase, where the noise could be heard below in the great room. As he had crept downward, he had spied his father standing before the open fire, staring into the flickering flames with a solemn look on his face.<\/p>\n<p>Ben was partially dressed in his trousers and just his robe, which hung opened, baring the older man\u2019s chest. His hair was mused from tossing and turning and once Ben had gotten out of bed, he had not bothered with combing down the wayward locks of silver.<\/p>\n<p>Adam wore trousers and his black shirt had been hastily buttoned. He moved forward and sat down in the chair at the foot of the steps, waiting for his father to give him some sort of answer to his question. Ben had been brooding for days now and Adam knew that something was troubling his father so much so, that Ben had lost sleep.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWell?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWell, what?\u201d Ben said in a tone that bordered on the irritable side.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat\u2019s bothering you, Pa? And please, don\u2019t try telling me that it\u2019s nothing. I know you\u2019ve lost sleep, you\u2019re grouchy and\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m not grouchy\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOh, you aren\u2019t?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo, I\u2019m\u2026worried,\u201d said Ben, his voice trailing off into a whisper.<\/p>\n<p>Ben turned his back to Adam and stared again, into the fire. Adam watched for several long moments before rising and moving to his father\u2019s side. When he placed his hand on Ben\u2019s shoulder, his father turned to look into his son\u2019s eyes. All Adam could seem to focus on was the well of tears that clouded the chocolate coloring. He could only wonder what had spurred his father to such deep emotion. Adam swallowed the fear that slowly rose from the back of his throat.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cTell me what\u2019s got you so upset, Pa, please; maybe I can help,\u201d Adam said with deep empathy for the man standing before him. \u201cAre you,\u201d Adam hesitated, swallowing again to wash down the near panic he felt, \u201cill?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo\u2026no, son, that\u2019s not it. I\u2019m fine\u2026physically\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThen what?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s\u2026Joseph\u2026he\u2019s\u2026\u201d Ben paused, trying to collect his thoughts enough to be able to explain to his son what he was feeling.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHe\u2019s not ill\u2026is he?\u201d stammered Adam, taken somewhat by surprise by the turn in the conversation. \u201cOr is he in trouble, again?\u201d Better trouble than ill, thought Adam.<\/p>\n<p>Adam saw Ben inhale deeply. \u201cNeither\u2026it\u2019s neither, Adam. I suppose it\u2019s really me.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa, you aren\u2019t making any sense, and frankly, you\u2019re scaring me,\u201d admitted Adam.<\/p>\n<p>Ben\u2019s mood lightened suddenly and he rushed on.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m sorry, Adam, I don\u2019t mean to frighten you. It\u2019s just this dream I\u2019ve been having, or rather this nightmare.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDream\u2026you\u2019re having a reoccurring dream? About what?\u201d Adam relaxed a bit.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhy don\u2019t you sit down, I\u2019ll tell you about it. It has me worried\u2026probably for no reason, but still, I can\u2019t help but\u2026wonder.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam lowered himself into the chair and Ben moved to the wide table and sat down, facing Adam. He folded his hands together in his lap.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoe is in some kind of danger\u2026or at least he is in my dream.\u201d Ben looked deeply into Adam\u2019s dark eyes. \u201cI fear\u2026for your brother\u2019s life, Adam\u2026I see him, hurt\u2026dying\u2026I hear him calling out to me, and I can\u2019t get to him. Oh, I know it\u2019s only a dream, but\u2026I\u2019ve had the same dream every night now for\u2026nearly a week.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s so real, son\u2026I can see the blood\u2026I can feel his pain and suffering, yet I can\u2019t do anything to help him. I wake up in a cold sweat, trembling and I\u2019ve gotten up on more than one occasion to go into Joe\u2019s room\u2026just to assure myself that he\u2019s fine\u2026and he always is.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam could see the swell of anxiety building in the brown eyes and when Ben stood up and turned away from him, Adam saw his father\u2019s hand move to his face and knew that Ben was struggling to contain himself.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI don\u2019t want him going on this cattle drive, Adam. I want him to stay home\u2026with me.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam rose to his feet, understanding his father\u2019s fear for their youngest family member.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa, you can\u2019t let your fears rule your thinking\u2026I mean, this isn\u2019t the first cattle drive Joe\u2019s ever gone one and\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBut it could be his last, Adam,\u201d Ben said quickly.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt could be my last one as well, or maybe Hoss\u2019\u2026anything could happen, to any one of use, or both\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDon\u2019t patronize me, son!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m sorry, I don\u2019t mean too, it\u2019s just that, you\u2019re letting your inner fears over rule your normal good judgment. But if you feel so strongly about it, tell Joe he can\u2019t go\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben almost laughed out right. \u201cOh sure, and then have to spend the next three, maybe four weeks listening to him complain?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam made a face, raising his brows in gesture. \u201cYou can\u2019t have it both ways, Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI know that, but I can\u2019t tell a nineteen year old that he can\u2019t go on a cattle drive that he\u2019s been going on half his life, just because his father had a dream and is afraid he might get hurt\u2026he\u2019ll think I\u2019ve lost my mind!\u201d ranted Ben.<\/p>\n<p>Adam rose again and moved to stand behind his father. He felt sorry for the man, he knew just how much Ben Cartwright loved the boy, all his sons in fact, but he knew that Ben worried most about Little Joe and had for years, lived in a silent fear that something might happen to the boy. Adam knew that if that ever happened, his father\u2019s world would be destroyed, he loved the boy that much, and more.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThen explain how you feel to Joe, maybe he\u2019ll volunteer to stay home\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben spun around. His expression was void of his feelings, but his tone said it all.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI can\u2019t do that, and you know it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam sighed deeply, allowing his open hands to gently slap his outer thighs.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThen, I don\u2019t know how to help you, Pa\u2026I could talk to Joe\u2026maybe he\u2019d listen to me.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOh, Adam, please\u2026you don\u2019t really believe that, do you?\u201d Ben couldn\u2019t help but smile, he understood better than any of them, how it was between his oldest and his youngest sons. They were like fire and water\u2026<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo, but thank you, son. I\u2019ll just have to put my fears away and trust that God will watch over my little boy\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLittle boy?\u201d Adam made a smirking sound. \u201cI wouldn\u2019t let him hear you referring to him as such.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben laughed lightly, feeling somewhat better after putting voice to his fears.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHe wouldn\u2019t like it much, would he?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m afraid not\u2026and Pa, all kidding aside, Joe\u2019s not a little boy anymore, he\u2019s a man, and he\u2019s proved that time and time again, to all of us.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben placed a loving arm about Adam\u2019s shoulders and smiled, nodding his head in agreement.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes he has\u2026many times, but son, to me\u2026Joe, as well as Hoss and yourself included, will always be my little boys.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI understand Pa\u2026and it\u2019s nice to know. But it\u2019s almost morning, why don\u2019t we try to get some sleep before the sun comes up?\u201d suggested Adam.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAlright Adam, lead the way,\u201d smiled Ben, willing now to put the matter to rest\u2026for now.<br \/>\nJoe hurried back to his room from his spot at the top of the stairs where he had been standing. He hadn\u2019t meant to eavesdrop, only to see what was going on downstairs. He had been awakened by voices and had crept from his bed. Joe had only made it to the top of the stairs when he had heard his name mentioned and heard his father talking with Adam in low tones.<\/p>\n<p>Joe was taken back by the knowledge that his father had been so worried about him. True, thought Joe, he wasn\u2019t worried about getting hurt while on a cattle drive, being hurt in some way could happen to any man doing that type of work. His father knew that, but it was the sound of Ben\u2019s voice, the worry Joe heard in each word as he described the dream to his brother. The quiver to his father\u2019s chin, the solemn expression that Joe had seen when he sneaked a peek around the corner of the wall. Joe had seen Adam go to their father and lay a comforting hand on a shoulder that appeared to be trembling. Whatever the dream had been, it had no doubt terrified his father, and that alone sent fear purging throughout Joe\u2019s veins.<\/p>\n<p>Listening softly at his door until he heard the closing of two other doors further down the hall, Joe moved quietly to the window and pushed back the heavy drapes that kept out the night air, and peeked out. The sky was black and the stars looked like a trillion little lights burning dimly in the heavens. Joe could hear a whip-o-will calling out to his mate and in the far distance, the howling of a coyote called out to the moon in a lonesome sort of cry.<\/p>\n<p>A long sigh escaped passed Joe\u2019s lips. He ran his slender fingers through the unruly curls that crowned his head. His thoughts ran rampant. For sure, Ben was worried, and frightened, and that alone surprised Joe, for he had always thought of his father as a fearless man, afraid of no one or nothing but he was wrong in his thinking, Ben was afraid of a dream, a dream that concerned him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI wish I knew what to do, to help you, Pa,\u201d Joe muttered into the darkness.<\/p>\n<p>The drapes fell back into place and Joe returned to his bed. \u201cMaybe I can think of something before morning\u2026before we leave on this cattle drive you want so badly for me to miss.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe lay with his arms folded across his chest, staring into the darkness over his head, where the ceiling was. Minutes later, he was sound asleep.<br \/>\n\u201cHEY, JOE,\u201d yelled Hoss from the doorway of his youngest brother\u2019s bedroom. \u201cTIME TO GET UP!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOh\u2026do you gotta shout?\u201d groaned Joe, pulling the pillow over his head.<\/p>\n<p>Hoss moved into the room, snickering to himself. Joe had never like mornings; all of Joe\u2019s family was aware of the fact and not one liked having the dubious task of waking the youngest member from a deep sleep.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSorry, Shortshakes, I know how ya feel, I\u2019d like to sleep in this morning as well but we got about 500 head of cattle out on the north range just aching to get movin\u2019. So\u2019s ya gotta get your scrawny butt outta that bed, now come on,\u201d said Hoss as he jerked the covers off his brother.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDadburn you, Hoss, it\u2019s freezing!\u201d complained Joe, reaching for the blankets and trying to pull them back up.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAw, no ya don\u2019t\u2026come on, up ya go.\u201d Hoss laughed and reached down, grabbing Joe by the arms and with little effort hauled the smaller man out of the bed. Hoss laughed at his brother\u2019s reddened face when he sat Joe on the floor.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYa might try sleeping in something other\u2019n ya skin, little brother, then ya wouldn\u2019t complain \u2018bout being cold in the mornin\u2019s,\u201d snickered Hoss.<\/p>\n<p>Quickly, Hoss grabbed Joe\u2019s trousers off the back of the chair and handed them to him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPut these on quick like and ya won\u2019t be cold. I\u2019m going downstairs and see what Hop Sing has for breakfast. You hurry up, and I might save ya a flapjack\u2026maybe even two.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGee thanks\u2026\u201d Joe moaned, but smiled when Hoss had gone.<\/p>\n<p>Joe finished fastening up his pants and grabbed his shirt from the bedpost where he had tossed it the night before. Quickly he slipped it on, and snatched up his boots as he hurried from the room. Boots in one hand, his other hand pulling his shirt together, Joe was half way down the stairs before his stocking feet slipped out from under him and he tumbled to the next level.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAW\u2026\u201d cried Joe, bringing his father and two brothers running from the table.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJOSEPH!\u201d shouted Ben as he rushed to Joe\u2019s side.<\/p>\n<p>Ben squatted down next to his son, whose body lay in a crumbled ball on the landing. Gently, Ben helped Joe into a sitting position. Joe rubbed his head and glanced weakly up at his father.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSorry, Pa,\u201d he muttered.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoseph, how many times, son, have I warned you about running barefooted down these wooden steps, you could have broken your neck!\u201d Ben scolded.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAre you alright?\u201d Adam asked as he moved the boots from the steps and offered his brother his hand.<\/p>\n<p>Joe\u2019s face wrinkled into a frown as he allowed his father and Adam to help him up.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOh\u2026\u201d sighed Joe.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat\u2019s wrong, son?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cMy ankle, I think I twisted it,\u201d Joe explained.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cCan ya put ya weight on it?\u201d Hoss wanted to know. \u201cIf\u2019n ya can\u2019t, I can carry ya to the settee.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe tried to put his foot on the floor, but drew back as the weight of his body was applied to the foot. He gritted his teeth, glanced from one to the other and shook his head.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI can\u2019t,\u201d he muttered.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLet\u2019s get you over to the settee and have a look at this foot. Hoss, tell Hop Sing to bring some warm water for Joe to soak his foot.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes sir,\u201d Hoss called, already on his way to the kitchen.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHop Sing, hear,\u201d the little Chinaman said as he scurried off to put some water on to heat.<\/p>\n<p>Adam and Ben had managed to get Joe to the settee, where Ben had Joe\u2019s foot propped on the wooden table. Adam carefully pulled Joe\u2019s sock off the injured foot. For a long moment, Adam stared at the naked foot. He gently turned it from one side to the other, glancing at Joe in wonder.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDoes this hurt?\u201d he questioned the boy.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOuch\u2026yes,\u201d Joe said, lowering his lashes.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAnd this?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOuch\u2026yes.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben glanced at his oldest son, watching how Adam twisted the ankle from side to side. He glanced at Joe, just in time to see the boy flinch.<\/p>\n<p>Ben put his hand over Adam\u2019s preventing any further movement of Joe\u2019s foot.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAdam, not so rough, you\u2019re hurting the boy,\u201d cautioned Ben.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSorry, I didn\u2019t mean too,\u201d said Adam.<\/p>\n<p>He fixed his dark eyes on his brother, but Joe refused to look up at him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHere warm water, Hop Sing add Epson salt, to help with swelling.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Hop Sing sat the pan on the floor in front of Joe and Ben gently lowered Joe\u2019s foot into the water.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThere, that should help.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe glanced at his father and offered a smile. \u201cThanks, Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe chanced a glance up at Adam and saw his brother standing with folded arms, watching him. Their eyes seemed to lock together, as if one was silently questioning the other, though nothing was said. But Adam knew and he offered Joe the slightest of smiles before speaking.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGuess you\u2019ll not be going on this cattle drive, you sure won\u2019t be any good to us now, not with that ankle like it is,\u201d Adam said after a lengthy silence.<\/p>\n<p>Ben\u2019s head jerked upward and he stared in wonder at his older son. He then turned to look at Joe and saw the painful expression that the boy tried to hide.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYour brother\u2019s right, Joe, you can\u2019t possibly go on this drive, why look at how fast that ankle is swelling. No, you\u2019ll just have to stay home this time.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBut, Pa!\u201d Joe whined, looking into the pan and seeing for himself how the ankle was beginning to swell. He was a bit surprised.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI can\u2019t let a little thing like a swollen ankle keep me from doing my share of the work\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoe, you heard what Pa said, you\u2019re not going, so just settle down and\u2026relax,\u201d Adam said.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHoss, you about ready to leave, there\u2019s cattle waiting for us?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYep, I\u2019m ready when you are, big brother.\u201d Hoss turned to Little Joe and his father.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYa take it easy, Shortshanks, ya hear? And don\u2019t go worrying Pa none, or I\u2019ll pound ya good when I get back,\u201d laughed Hoss.<\/p>\n<p>Ben stood up from the kneeling position he was in and glanced at Hoss and Adam, and back at Joe.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll see your brothers out and then be right back.\u201d Ben pointed his finger at his youngest, \u201ckeep that foot in that warm water, you hear?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe gave his father a cheeky grin. \u201cYes sir\u2026but\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo butts, young man, you\u2019re staying home.\u201d Ben stole a sideways glance at Adam and smiled.<\/p>\n<p>Hoss was on his way out the door and Ben followed, leaving Adam behind, fastening his gun belt.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI don\u2019t know how you knew Joe, but\u2026thanks,\u201d Adam said from behind Joe.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI don\u2019t know what you\u2019re talking about,\u201d Joe said in a low voice.<\/p>\n<p>He was studying his foot. Adam moved back over to the settee and watched Joe, who happened to be avoiding looking at him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJust how did you know?\u201d Adam hinted.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cKnow what?\u201d Joe said, casting a quick look up.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI don\u2019t have time for games, Joe, the men are waiting for me\u2026tell me\u2026how did you know?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe smiled up at his brother. \u201cI heard the two of you talking last night, I thought someone was downstairs and I started down to see what was going on. I heard my name mentioned and\u2026well, I stopped to listen.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam\u2019s mouth formed a frown and he shook his head slightly from side to side.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cEavesdropping, again.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI didn\u2019t mean too, honest Adam. I started to go back to bed, but then I saw the look on Pa\u2019s face, I knew something was bad wrong, so\u2026I\u2026eavesdropped. You aren\u2019t going to tell him, are you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe looked as if he were pouting.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo\u2026not this time, because I happen to think you did the right thing\u2026for once,\u201d laughed Adam.<\/p>\n<p>Joe giggled. \u201cThanks, Adam.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam turned to leave but hesitated briefly, smiling down at his brother. \u201cNo, Joe, thank you. Pa was really torn up about that nightmare he\u2019s been having.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI figured that out last night. Maybe he\u2019ll get some rest now and\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The front door opened and Ben appeared. \u201cAdam, you coming? The men are pulling out.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOn my way,\u201d Adam called heading toward the door. \u201cTake care of yourself, Joe.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben opened the door wide to allow Adam to exit. Adam paused for a moment and placed a hand on his father\u2019s shoulder.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou try to get some rest now, Pa. You somehow managed to get your wish,\u201d Adam smiled.<\/p>\n<p>Ben glanced back at Joe and then smiled again at Adam. \u201cIt was more a prayer than a wish, now get a move on, Joe and I will be fine.\u201d<br \/>\nBen looked up from where he sat at his desk, to see Joe walking down the stairs. Instantly, Ben was on his feet and by the time that Joe had reached the bottom of the stairs, Ben was waiting, looking anxious.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoseph, you shouldn\u2019t be out of bed, not yet\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAw\u2026Pa, I\u2019m fine honest,\u201d smiled Joe. \u201cAnd so is my ankle, look, I got my boot on.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSon\u2026are you sure, I mean, really I don\u2019t think you should be walking yet\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe smiled and eased around his father.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s better, really, and besides, I was lone\u2026I thought you might be lonesome, so I figured I\u2019d join you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe moved to Ben\u2019s desk and sat down in the chair off to one side. \u201cWhat are you working on? Anything I can help you with?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben had been watching, with a smidgen of suspicion, the ease in which his son moved. His face expressed his confusion. With eyes dark, Ben approached the desk and sat down, casting his eyes in the boy\u2019s direction.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThere\u2019s something odd about your ankle, Joseph,\u201d Ben said.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cUmm\u2026my ankle?\u201d Joe piped lowly.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt seems to have made a rather quick recovery, it\u2019s only been a couple of days. I wonder how it did that?\u201d Ben said as realization hit him full force in the face.<\/p>\n<p>He almost laughed outright. He had been bumfuzzled, by his youngest son. Ben could only wonder if Adam had anything to do with this, or if by chance, Joe had found out about his nightmare and had taken matters into his own hands.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWould you like to explain it to me?\u201d Ben said with mock sternness. He almost lost it when he saw Joe swallow and look down with a child-like expression on his face.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDo I gotta?\u201d Joe said, his voice almost a whisper.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, you \u2018gotta\u2019!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe finally raised his head and looked into his father\u2019s eyes. Ben\u2019s voice had sounded as if he was angry, but the twinkle in his dark eyes, told Joe another story. The younger Cartwright felt himself relax a little.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI over heard you and Adam talking\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat have I told you about eavesdropping, young man?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBut Pa, I didn\u2019t mean to listen, honest, I just came down stairs to see who was moving around and when I started down the steps, I heard you and Adam talking, so I started back to my room, but then I heard you mention my name\u2026and I\u2026well, I was curious,\u201d Joe said meekly.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAnd you listened?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes sir\u2026and I\u2019m not sorry.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe jumped to his feet when he saw a spark of true anger flicker in his father\u2019s eyes.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI didn\u2019t know you were so worried. Why didn\u2019t you tell me how you felt? All you had to do was ask me to stay home\u2026and I would have,\u201d Joe stated firmly.<\/p>\n<p>The anger melted away when Ben saw the look on his son\u2019s handsome face and he smiled at the boy.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou know as well as I do, Joseph, if I had asked you to stay home, you would have refused whole-heartedly\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo I wouldn\u2019t\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes you would have. And if I had told you why I wanted you to stay home, you would have laughed, called me overly protected, declared me insane and then ranted and raved about how you are not a little boy, but a man and that you were perfectly capable of taking care of yourself. Then, when that didn\u2019t work, you would have used the excuse that Hoss and Adam would be along to make sure that nothing happened to you and that I was just being foolish and then you would have accused me not being able to cut the apron strings and then\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay, Pa\u2026I get the picture,\u201d giggled Joe. \u201cYou know me pretty well, don\u2019t you?\u201d smiled Joe.<\/p>\n<p>Ben returned the smile. \u201cLike the back of my hand, young man.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe and Ben both laughed and Ben surprised Joe by pulling him into a hug and holding him tightly.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you son, for what you\u2019ve done,\u201d Ben said softly.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa\u2026why didn\u2019t you come to me about the dream? I had no idea that you were so\u2026worried about me. I mean\u2026I understand how dreams can work on your mind and mix up your thoughts and I guess I know better than anyone else, how frightening and real a nightmare can seem. I\u2019ve had enough of them in my lifetime.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben pinched his lips together and walked around the corner of the desk to sit down. He was silent for a moment, and then looked up into the expectant face of his youngest son. When he spoke, Ben\u2019s voice was thick with sentiment.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI suppose I didn\u2019t want you to think I was being silly. After all, it was only a dream.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe had to swallow his unexpected emotion, for the words struck a cord in his heart. He moved to his father\u2019s side and squatted down, finding it hard to put voice to his words.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa, I\u2019d never think of you as being silly when you were only trying to protect me from being harmed. It only shows me, more, how much you\u2026love me,\u201d stammered Joe, his eyes filling with tears.<\/p>\n<p>Ben sniffed away his own tears and smiled. \u201cThank you for that, Joe. I couldn\u2019t bare it, if something awful happened to you, and I could do nothing to help you. I\u2019d rather die a dozen times than to see one of my sons suffer needlessly because of me, because I was unable to help them.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI know you would\u2026and you have no idea what that means to me,\u201d Joe assured his father.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWell, you mean a lot to me, son, don\u2019t ever forget that. Now that we have settled this matter, what do you want to do? I suppose that you\u2019d like to catch up to your brothers and join the drive, am I right?\u201d Ben questioned.<\/p>\n<p>Joe was thoughtful for a minute.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIs that what you want me to do, Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben took his turn at being thoughtful.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI asked you what you wanted to do,\u201d he stated.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWell,\u201d began Joe, rising and walking to the front of the desk where he turned and faced his father. \u201cIf it\u2019s all the same to you, I\u2019d\u2026like to stay here\u2026with you. Maybe we could do some fishing, or we could track that big cat that\u2019s been stalking the cattle over near Montpelier Gorge in the meadow.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThat\u2019s a good idea, are you sure your ankle is up to it?\u201d Ben asked with a twinkle in his eyes.<\/p>\n<p>Joe giggled. \u201cI\u2019m sure, it wasn\u2019t hurt very badly anyway.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cTell me something, Joe.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSure.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThe fall down the stairs, was it planned?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBelieve it or not, it wasn\u2019t planned, I had something else in mind,\u201d snickered Joe.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThen you really did trip?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe laughed out right and nodded his head. \u201cYes sir, I guess I was just lucky enough that I really didn\u2019t hurt my foot any worse than it was.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLooks as if both of us were lucky,\u201d smiled Ben. \u201cNow, about that hunting trip, when would you like to leave?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHow about first light? That will give us enough time to get some things together. With Hop Sing gone on the drive, we\u2019ll have to dig around some to find something to eat,\u201d laughed Joe.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhy don\u2019t we camp here for the night, son? It looks like a pretty nice spot,\u201d suggested Ben, pulling Buck to a halt.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAnything you say, Pa. Those cat tracks lead straight up that draw, we can get an early start in the morning,\u201d Joe agreed.<\/p>\n<p>Ben looked at Joe, watching how gracefully the boy dismounted his horse and how Joe moved around, already beginning to set up their camp for the night.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m glad we decided to come here,\u201d Ben said, looking about at the breath taking sight that unfolded before his eyes. \u201cIt\u2019s beautiful here, don\u2019t you think, Joseph?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe paused and glanced around, taking in the same scenery that his father\u2019s eyes had just scanned. He placed himself next to his father, glancing at Ben\u2019s expression.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah Pa, it is pretty,\u201d he said in a low voice. \u201cYou\u2026love this land, don\u2019t you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben\u2019s head jerked around surprised that his son had read his thoughts. He smiled, nodding.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, very much, but it isn\u2019t my life,\u201d smiled Ben.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI know\u2026you\u2019ve told me that before.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWell I meant it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes sir\u2026I know you do,\u201d Joe said, his tone full of emotion.<\/p>\n<p>Ben let out a long satisfied sigh and looked off into the horizon again. After a moment, he moved to the horses and began unsaddling Buck.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll tend to the horses son, if you\u2019ll gather some wood and get the fire started. I don\u2019t know about you,\u201d laughed Ben, \u201cbut I\u2019m starved.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe laughed as well and began gathering sticks.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNow you sound like Hoss, he\u2019s always hungry,\u201d snickered Joe.<\/p>\n<p>Ben paused, looking over his shoulder at Joe. He seemed lost in thought and when he laughed lightly, Joe turned around to see what was so funny.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt must be the out of doors that spikes a man\u2019s appetite,\u201d concluded Ben.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYours maybe, and mine, but I think Hoss was just born hungry, and most likely will die hungry,\u201d giggled Joe.<\/p>\n<p>Their carefree mood continued long after the setting of the sun, after the stars began twinkling and far later into the night than what Ben had intended for it too. But he could not help himself, he was enjoying the private time he was sharing with his youngest son, for it was seldom that he got to spend time alone with one of his sons, on a one on one basis. He reflected back to his time alone with Adam, when he had pulled up stakes back in Boston and headed west, just he and his son. Times had been hard, but he cherished the times he and his oldest son had spent together. They shared a bond with one another, something that had never been severed. But time alone with Hoss or Joe was rare, they had a ranch to run and their days had always been filled with work of some sort, taking away from just a father and son experience, such as he was sharing now with Joe.<\/p>\n<p>Ben watched as Joe snuggled down into his bedroll and made himself comfortable. He could only wonder where the years had gone. It seemed like just yesterday that the young man, whom he watched now, had been nothing more than a little boy, his shadow. Ben snickered softly, so proud of who and what that little boy had become.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNight, Pa,\u201d Joe called from the opposite side of the campfire.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGood night, son, sleep well,\u201d responded Ben.<br \/>\nBen was surprised again the next morning when he woke to the smell of frying bacon and bubbly coffee. He pushed off the blanket that covered him and rose up on one elbow. Joe had his back to his father and had not noticed that Ben had gotten up, until his father\u2019s shadow lay across him. Joe turned suddenly, almost knocking the pot of hot coffee into the fire.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m sorry, son, I didn\u2019t mean to startle you,\u201d Ben said quickly, watching how Joe pulled his hand back from the fire in a swift movement. \u201cDid you burn yourself?\u201d Ben said, squatting down and taking Joe\u2019s hand into his own and looking it over.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhew\u2026that was close,\u201d laughed Joe. \u201cI thought for a moment, a bear had crept up on me.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben still held Joe\u2019s outstretched fingers. \u201cWe\u2019d better put something on this burn. I\u2019m sorry Joe, I should have made my presence known\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAw\u2026it\u2019s nothing, don\u2019t worry yourself. Here, hand me that plate, the bacon\u2019s ready,\u201d Joe said, pulling his hand free and turning back to the skillet.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWe gonna start tracking that cat this morning?\u201d he asked as he heaped Ben\u2019s plate full of bacon and eggs.<\/p>\n<p>Ben poured the coffee and finding a flat rock, sat down to enjoy his breakfast. \u201cMight as well, that\u2019s what we came up here for,\u201d he smiled.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSure hope we find him, I\u2019d love to nail his hide to the barn door and then watch the expressions on Adam and Hoss\u2019 faces when they get back.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben laughed at his son\u2019s enthusiasm. \u201cJoseph, what on earth am I going to do with you?\u201d teased Ben.<br \/>\nThey had ridden for half a day and then pulled their mounts to a halt, leaving the horses in a small clearing below Montpelier Gorge. Together, Ben and Joe climbed the steep incline, up the side of the mountain. By the time they reached the top, both were huffing and puffing as they sat down to catch their breath.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhew\u2026I\u2019m getting too old for this!\u201d Ben said in between gasps.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m not old, like you, and it\u2019s\u2026hmm\u2026sorry, I didn\u2019t mean that the way it came out,\u201d Joe said meekly.<\/p>\n<p>He turned to glance at his father, expecting to see a scowl on his face, but in stead, Ben was smiling. When Ben saw the look on his son\u2019s face, he started laughing, which in turn, caused Joe to giggle.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cCome on, young man, help your \u2018ole pappy\u2019 get up,\u201d teased Ben, stretching his hand out to Joe who, by now, was on his feet.<\/p>\n<p>Joe grasped the proffered hand and hoisted Ben to his feet. The warmth of his father\u2019s hand in his sent reminiscent thoughts flashing before his eyes. For a long moment, Joe held the hand, letting his memories race through his mind, touching his heart.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIs something wrong?\u201d Ben asked after a time.<\/p>\n<p>Startled from the past, back to the future, Joe felt his cheeks redden as he let go of his father\u2019s hand. He half snickered, making a strange sound in the back of his throat.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo\u2026\u201d he stammered.<\/p>\n<p>Joe turned to pick up his rifle and started leading the way across the plateau that they had finally reached. They walked along the rim, able to look down into the ravine from which they had climbed. Down below, they spotted the horses where they had been left, munching on the tender grass in the little clearing.<\/p>\n<p>A high, shrill, ear-piercing scream shattered the serene setting. Birds scattered from their perches in the trees and it seemed as if time stood still. Joe jerked his head around, looking back at his father. Ben was eyeing their surroundings, searching for the cat that had announced his presence.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cShh\u2026be still son, that big cat\u2019s got to be close,\u201d whispered Ben, hunkering down.<\/p>\n<p>Joe squatted down beside his father. \u201cHe\u2019s probably watching us right now,\u201d Joe said, facing the opposite direction. His eyes scanned the nearby rocks and trees; he saw only one thing\u2026<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa, look!\u201d Joe said, rising slightly. \u201cThe horses, they\u2019ve taken off.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben suppressed a groan, pinching his lips tightly and shaking his head. Buck and Cochise were headed back toward the house, more than a day\u2019s ride where Ben and Joe stood watching.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThat\u2019s not good, now we\u2019ll have to walk out of here,\u201d Ben said in a low voice. \u201cCome on, lets move along this ridge. Be sure to keep a sharp eye, Joe, that cat\u2019s big and he\u2019s dangerous,\u201d cautioned Ben.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll lead, Pa, and you cover our backs. We can make our way around these boulders and start working our way back down on the other side.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Father and son crept along the ledge, keeping a sharp eye out for the cat that seemed to have vanished into thin air. The air was still and all around them it had grown deathly silent. Only the sounds of the tiny pebbles rolling down the side of the rocks, gave any clue that there was anything moving about.<\/p>\n<p>Joe stopped and leaned down, looking closely at the ground. He glanced over his shoulder at his father and motioned for Ben to come closer.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLook,\u201d Joe whispered, pointing to the large tracks in the ground. \u201cJust ahead,\u201d he said in a lower voice.<\/p>\n<p>Joe crept slowly, keeping low, glancing upward to the rocks that were now over their heads and into the trees that were suspended outward from the formations. He watched every step he took and then turned to put a finger to his lips, ordering complete silence. One more step and Joe pointed ahead of him, turning to check that Ben was still behind him.<\/p>\n<p>It was an error in timing. From its perch hideout, atop a huge boulder, high over their heads, the mighty cat sprung. Joe heard Ben scream his name, heard the shot that came from his father\u2019s gun and the single bullet that discharged from his own rifle when he fell.<\/p>\n<p>The startled young hunter had become the hunted. Joe felt the weight of the cat as it landed on his chest, knocking the wind from his lungs and sending himself and the puma falling backwards down the steep hillside. For what seemed a lifetime, Joe and the cat, locked together, rolled over and over. The stones cut deeply into Joe\u2019s back as the hunter and his victim plummeted downward. Joe felt the animal\u2019s foul breath blowing in his face, the stinging of his flesh where the puma\u2019s claws dug deeply and Joe heard his voice screaming out in pain for his father to shoot.<\/p>\n<p>Another shot, and all was silent. Joe lay, paralyzed with fear and pain, unable to move, afraid to breathe, relieved to be alive. A warm sensation filled him as he tried to gather his senses and raise his head, searching for his father. A stab of pain jolted him from his delirium and back into reality. It was unbearable, the surge of agony that pumped through his veins, attacking every limb, every muscle, every part of his body.<\/p>\n<p>Joe screamed, his world spun, his life\u2019s blood drained slowly from his body, and as the tender hands he knew so well, gathered him into a warm embrace, his body shuddered and Joe lapsed into a darkened world where his pain and fear had found temporary refuge.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJOE!\u201d screamed Ben, taking the limp body into his arms and holding his son\u2019s head against his chest, near his rapidly pounding heart.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoe\u2026I\u2019m so sorry!\u201d wailed Ben.<\/p>\n<p>Ben had slid, mostly on his backside, more than halfway down the embankment. His clothes were covered in dirt, his shirt was torn but Ben gave no mind to trivial things, he was set on reaching his injured son.<\/p>\n<p>Ben took several deep breaths to calm himself, before being able to lay Joe flat and examine his wounds. He cringed when he saw the cuts make by the sharp claws and forced himself not to scream out when he saw the bullet wound in the back of Joe\u2019s left shoulder.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDear God,\u201d wailed the distraught father, \u201cwhat have I done to you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben looked all around him, shaking with fear. The cat was dead, thank God, shot in the heart. But Joe, the boy lingered between life and dead and from where they were located, without horses or means to transport his son, Ben feared the worst.<\/p>\n<p>Quickly Ben ripped apart his torn shirt and placed the scrap over the bullet wound in an attempt to squelch the bleeding. Closer examination showed that the wound, though deep, had scraped across the top of Joe\u2019s shoulder. The bullet had not entered, but rather ripped a path through his son\u2019s flesh. Ben whispered a prayer of thanks and then, removing his jacket wrapped it around Joe\u2019s body.<\/p>\n<p>Ben stood to his feet, glancing upward and then down to the bottom of the hillside. Either way, it would be rough going, nearly impossible to lower Joe from the steep rocks and ledges that stood in their way. It would take every ounce of true grit he had in him just to get his son to a doctor in time to save Joe\u2019s life. Fear surged through Ben\u2019s veins; his nightmare had become actuality.<\/p>\n<p>The loose ground soaked up the blood. Ben\u2019s eyes clouded with unshed tears as he wracked his brain for a way to get Joe the help he so desperately needed.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSo much blood,\u201d he muttered.<\/p>\n<p>With fingers that tremble, Ben tore the sleeves of Joe\u2019s shirt, gasping at the deep gouges that the mountain lion\u2019s claws had left in his son\u2019s flesh. Ripping more of the shirt, Ben tied the strips around the cuts as best he could.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoe?\u201d Ben cooed. \u201cCan you hear me, son?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe began to move his head. His eyelids flickered and then slowly opened.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoe?\u201d Ben said, forcing the worried expression from his face. The last thing his son needed now was to see his father so fearful and worried.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa?\u201d Joe said weakly. \u201cThe cat?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben could hear the apprehension in his son\u2019s voice, and could see the pain in the hazel eyes that searched his face.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThe cat\u2019s dead, Joe, he\u2019s not going to hurt you anymore\u2026Oh, Joseph,\u201d Ben said, his voice cracking. \u201cI\u2019m so sorry, son\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo\u2026not your\u2026fault\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI should have been the one\u2026I should have\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa\u2026please\u2026don\u2019t,\u201d Joe said with a sob. \u201cOh\u2026hurts, Pa\u2026hurts bad,\u201d Joe moaned.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI have to find some way to get you out of here\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHorses\u2026gone\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, and so is all our gear\u2026Joe,\u201d Ben said, leaning low, \u201cthere\u2019s no water either, no blankets\u2026God\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben was beside himself with worry and frustration, self-imposed guilt, and horror for what he deemed his fault. The fearful father gulped for air, willing himself to regain a calm pretense, for his son\u2019s sake.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoe,\u201d Ben said softly, \u201cI\u2019m going to move you to a safe place, and then see if I can find you some water\u2026do you understand, Joe? I have to go for help.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe\u2019s eyes had closed tightly against the pain but he nodded his head slightly.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s going to hurt a little,\u201d Ben cautioned as he gently began lifting Joe into his arms.<\/p>\n<p>Joe clinched his teeth as a wave of pain washed over him. Ben looked around, locating a deep overhang, just yards from where he stood with Joe in his arms. The large protruding boulders would shield Joe from the hot sun and provide some protection from the cold, should he be unable to return before night cast its shadows upon the world. Carefully so as not to trip or drop the wounded boy, Ben carried Joe to the spot he had selected and lowered his son onto the ground.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll not be long, son,\u201d Ben said, replacing his jacket about Joe and making the boy as comfortable as possible under the circumstances. \u201cJoe? Joe?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben sighed, Joe had passed out again. Worried that danger still lurked about them, Ben moved several large branches that had long since given way to the elements, and used them as a barrier to protect his son from the same. Joe could hardly be seen, lying on the ground behind the curtain of debris Ben had built, but still Ben worried. There were wild animals that lurked, the smell of blood was fresh on the air and Ben knew that it was only a matter of time before the scent was picked up. The cat, Ben pulled off to one side of the rocks and pushed the carcass over the side. He watched the cat fall and waited until he heard the loud thud, telling him the dead animal had reached the bottom of the steepest incline.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoe,\u201d Ben said again, \u201cI\u2019ve loaded your rifle and here\u2019s your gun, son\u2026I\u2019ll be back just as soon as I can. Joe\u2026can you hear me, son\u2026I promise, I\u2019ll be back\u2026I\u2019ll be back, Joe.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Though Joe was unaware that his father had done so, Ben placed the guns within Joe\u2019s reach and stood to his feet. With one hand, he wiped away the moisture that had collected on his brow and then began the dubious job of climbing down the side of the rocks, to the clearing where the horses had been before running off.<\/p>\n<p>His mind was filled with \u2018what ifs\u2019, and Ben had a hard time concentrating on the job before him. Once down the incline, he rushed to the small clearing in hopes that he\u2019d find something in which to help his son. The disappointment showed on his face, for Ben stood as in a daze, defeat written across every line that had formed in the scowl he made.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOh Joseph, how could I have been so foolish?\u201d the distraught father muttered. \u201cLetting myself be ruled by my fear of nothing more than a mere dream. If I had only let you go on that cattle drive, none of this would have happened to you,\u201d he groaned aloud.<\/p>\n<p>Ben glanced around, picking the route he would take. The ground was fairly level where he stood, but he knew that ahead lay more treacherous ground and that walking would be hard, running for help impossible. They were miles from home, having already spent one night on the trail and Ben feared that his son would succumb to his injuries before help could be reached. What he needed was a miracle.<\/p>\n<p>Several times, Ben tripped, nearly falling. The times he did fall, he quickly managed to get back on his feet and continue running. The sun was still high in the sky and the temperature was slowly rising. It seemed to the weary man that he had run for miles, tripped dozens of times and glanced at the sun more times than could remember or cared to count. Without water, his throat had become dry and several times, Ben had to stop to rest, wishing for something to quench his thirst.<\/p>\n<p>After what seemed like an eternity, Ben reached the bluff. He wished for his horse, for the trek across had been much easier on horseback and immediately, Ben longed for a more simple route to take, than the one that imposed itself on him now.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDear God,\u201d Ben beseeched, \u201cgive me strength,\u201d he prayed aloud.<\/p>\n<p>Ben allowed himself only minutes to rest and then began the climb. His fingers dug into the loose gravel; slipping and sliding down on his stomach Ben set his determination in his heart and soul. Without brushing off the dirt and grime, he pushed onward and upward, crawling most of the way. He used his hands to dig into the soft earth, the stones dug into his fingers and gouged at the palms of his hands. Tiny droplets of blood seeped from the cuts and dripped, blending in with the dark soil and leaving no trace of his presence.<\/p>\n<p>Nearly to the top, Ben paused to catch his breath. He cast a downward glance to see how far he had come and then began climbing the last short distance to the crest. This time he stumbled and fell forward, groaning loudly as he hit the hard ground. His body began sliding and Ben struggled to grasp a handhold. There was nothing for his fingers to latch onto; the gravels were rolling along with him, the larger stones were impossible to reach. Ben began rolling over and over, his head hit something hard and by the time that his battered body had reached the bottom of the incline, Ben had slipped into the furthermost corner of oblivion.<\/p>\n<p>The time clicked slowly by. The sun had reached its peek and once there, began the slow descent into the western horizon. Ben lay silent and stilled by his tumble down the side of the steep grade. Birds squawked overhead as they sought the highest of limbs for their nightly perch. And far away, beneath the ledge of a rock, hidden by the barrier his father had fashioned, Joe Cartwright\u2019s life slipped further and further away from the place where he longed to be.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa?\u201d murmured the weaken boy. \u201cPlease\u2026hurry,\u201d he whined, slipping again into a remote section of repose.<br \/>\n\u201cLooky there!\u201d the old man called to the younger man sitting next to him in the rickety old wagon.<\/p>\n<p>The horses had stopped and each man sat atop the wooden seat and stared at the prone figure of a man, lying motionless along side their wagon.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cReckon he\u2019s dead?\u201d the other fellow wondered out loud.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAin\u2019t but one way to tell,\u201d the old man said as he labored at getting down from the seat and slowly made his way over to the lifeless form.<\/p>\n<p>The old man stood over Ben\u2019s body and gently nudged Ben\u2019s shoulder with the toe of his boot. Ben gave no response to the man\u2019s effort.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIs he dead?\u201d the younger of the two questioned.<\/p>\n<p>Slowly the second man climbed down from the wagon and worked his way around the back, stopping long enough to pull a canteen from the bed.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNope, but he\u2019s mighty banged up.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The whiskered old man had squatted down and was holding Ben\u2019s head gently against him in an upright position.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHand me that water, Henry,\u201d he ordered, taking the canteen from the outstretched hand.<\/p>\n<p>Henry squatted down as well and looked up toward the top of the rim. \u201cReckon he fell down that hill, Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Clyde looked back across his shoulder and nodded his head. \u201cI\u2019d say so from the looks of\u2019em.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Clyde pulled the cork from the canteen and offered the canteen to Ben\u2019s lips. As he tilted the water receptacle up, the cool water began pouring out against the parched mouth that sought greedily for the moisture.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHe\u2019s coming around,\u201d Clyde said.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWater\u2026more,\u201d mumbled Ben as his hands reached out to grasp the canteen and tip it upward.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cEasy mister,\u201d Clyde cautioned, pulling the canteen away from Ben\u2019s mouth. \u201cNot so fast, it\u2019ll make ya sick.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben\u2019s eyes focused on the old man\u2019s face and he tried nodding his head.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI have to get help,\u201d Ben said, forcing the words from the back of his seared throat.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYa got help now, sonny,\u201d Clyde said, poking the cork back into the opening. \u201cYa gonna be alright, once we get ya back to our place and ya rest up a bit.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben grabbed for the man\u2019s shirt; desperation shown in his dark eyes as he tried to make the man understand that the help he needed was not for himself, but for his injured and perhaps dying son.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo\u2026\u201d Ben cried, trying to make his words heard, \u201cmy\u2026my\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNow, now,\u201d soothed Clyde as he motioned for his son, Henry, to help him load Ben into the back of the wagon. \u201cYa throat\u2019s so parched, ya can\u2019t even talk, \u2018sides, ya ain\u2019t makin\u2019 much sense no how.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHe\u2019s passed out again, Pa,\u201d Henry said as Ben was lowered into the wagon. \u201cWonder who he be?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAin\u2019t got no idey, boy. But he\u2019s in a bad way. We best get him home, ya Ma will know what to do for\u2019em.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Clyde and Henry climbed back into the wagon. \u201cGittyup horse,\u201d he called as he slapped the reins down on the backsides of the horses.<\/p>\n<p>Ma laid aside her apron and wiped off her hands when she heard the shouts out front. She rushed out onto the porch and watched as her husband and son jumped down from the wagon. She was amazed at the unaccustomed spring to her husband\u2019s bounce as she saw him hurry to the back of the wagon.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cTurn down the bed, Mother,\u201d Clyde called. \u201cWe\u2019ve found us an injured man.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOh my,\u201d clamored Ma as she hurried back into the house and into the bedroom that was separated from the main room by a quilt hanging from a rope strung across the room.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIn here,\u201d she called as Clyde and Henry carried the stranger into the house and carefully placed Ben on the narrow cot that served as Henry\u2019s bed.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat happened to\u2019em?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDon\u2019t rightly know, Mother. We found him lying at the foot of Montpelier Gorge, I reckon the poor old fella must\u2019ve fallen off one of them rocky slopes,\u201d Clyde explained.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAin\u2019t he got no horse?\u201d she asked, astonished that someone could be so foolish as to believe they could cross that rocky slope on foot, alone no less.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDidn\u2019t see no horse,\u201d Henry told his mother.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cCan ya do somethin\u2019 for\u2019em?\u201d Clyde asked.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI can try,\u201d Mother said, already at work ripping the remains of Ben\u2019s shirt from his battered body.<\/p>\n<p>Once the woman had Ben cleaned up and his scrapes and cuts bandaged, she covered him with a warm blanket and left him alone.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHe\u2019s out cold,\u201d she explained to her men folk. \u201cYa best be gettin\u2019 to ya chores, I\u2019ll call ya when he wakes up,\u201d she promised.<\/p>\n<p>Henry followed his father outside. \u201cYa tend to the stock, son, I\u2019m gonna see if\u2019n I can find out who this man be,\u201d Clyde ordered gently as he returned to the house.<\/p>\n<p>Mother turned at the sound of the opening door and while she finished preparing the evening meal, she watched as her husband began going through the stranger\u2019s things.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat\u2019cha doin\u2019, Clyde?\u201d she asked, dusting off her hands and coming to stand behind her husband.<\/p>\n<p>Clyde had pulled Ben\u2019s billfold from his vest pocket and was rummaging through it.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m tryin\u2019 to find out who this fella is. Might be someone important,\u201d he explained.<\/p>\n<p>Clyde pulled out some bills, counted the money, glanced at his wife and then, with a deep sigh, slid the money back into Ben\u2019s billfold.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThat sure is a lot of money,\u201d Mother whispered.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSure is, but we ain\u2019t so broke that I\u2019d steal it,\u201d Clyde answered.<\/p>\n<p>He looked deeper into the leather and found a folded paper. Unfolding it, he scanned it.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIts some kind of note, signed by a Mr. Ben Cartwright\u2026reckon that\u2019s him,\u201d Clyde informed his wife with a nod in Ben\u2019s direction.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDid it say where he\u2019s from?\u201d Mother asked.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNope, but I\u2019ve heard of Ben Cartwright. He owns the biggest spread around these parts,\u201d Clyde explained. \u201cHe\u2019s our neighbor to the west of us, Mother.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Clyde put the paper back where he found it and returned Ben\u2019s wallet to its proper place. He walked to the door, stopping and turning back to his wife.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI wonder, Clara, what a man like that is doing wonderin\u2019 around these here parts with no horse, no water, nothin\u2019 but the clothes on his back? Don\u2019t seem natural, somehow.\u201d<br \/>\nThe darkness proclaimed the night as the evening light drew dimmer and descended upon the mountainside where Joe lay hidden. His body quivered with the dampness that chilled his bones. His eyes opened slowly, his vision blinded by the blackness that surrounded him. For several minutes he lay, motionless, trying to collect his senses. Pain ravished his body and with each movement, piteous whimpers slipped passed his lips and echoed in the hollowed out rocks where his father had hidden him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa?\u201d cried Joe, moving his hand slowly across his chest and down to his side.<\/p>\n<p>He could feel the sticky substance that had begun to dry and knew it to be his blood. Panic filled his confused mind, bewildering thoughts raced though his head as Joe moved again.<\/p>\n<p>This time his fingers touched the rifle and tightened around the stock.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa! Where\u2026are\u2026you?\u201d Joe whined.<\/p>\n<p>In an attempt to understand where he was and why he was alone, Joe raised his head. He was forced to shut his eyes against the pain enough that he rose up more, almost to a sitting position. Fingers grasped the rifle and Joe used the weapon to push himself further into a sitting position.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAW\u2026\u201d he screamed aloud as a surge of agony washed over him. \u201cPa\u2026why\u2019d ya leave me?\u201d he sobbed, sinking down again onto the cold, hard ground.<\/p>\n<p>Hazel eyes clouded with tears, and blessed nothingness took Joe back to no-man\u2019s land, free again from his affliction.<br \/>\nIt was morning by the time that Ben began to stir. His head ached and it seemed as if every muscle in his body was ablaze with pain. When he lifted his head and looked around, he was surprised to find himself in a warm cozy cabin and more so when he spied the woman and the man sitting together at the table in the center of the room.<\/p>\n<p>Cautiously, Ben pushed himself upright. His hand went to his head, in an attempt to still the constant pounding in his temples.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGood morning,\u201d Clara greeted her guest.<\/p>\n<p>Ben swung his legs over the side of the cot and placed his feet on the floor. It was then that he realized that he had on no trousers. Using the blanket to cover himself, Ben greeted the man and woman.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWho are you?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cName\u2019s Clyde Logan,\u201d Clyde said, rising and crossing the room to shake Ben\u2019s hand. \u201cThis here is my wife, Clara. You Ben Cartwright?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben had risen to his feet and shook hands with Clyde. He seemed surprised that the stranger knew his name.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThat\u2019s right, but how\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhen we found ya, we looked through ya things,\u201d Clyde explained.<\/p>\n<p>Ben looked around for his clothes.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDon\u2019t ya worry none, I didn\u2019t steal ya money,\u201d Clyde said, giving Ben a sharp look.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOh\u2026I\u2019m sorry, I wasn\u2019t thinking you had, honest.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHere ya go, Mr. Cartwright,\u201d Clara said.<\/p>\n<p>She had picked up Ben\u2019s trousers and handed them to him, turning away so that Ben might have a bit of privacy in slipping into them.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cTell me something, Mr. Cartwright, what in blazes was ya doin\u2019 runnin\u2019 \u2018round out in the middle of nowhere, all alone, without a horse or water?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Clyde motioned for Ben to join him at the table and while they sat down, Clara began fixing Ben a plate.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI was\u2026ere\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben looked confused and gave both Clyde and Clara a confused look.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m not sure,\u201d he stammered. \u201cI\u2026I\u2026can\u2019t seem to remember,\u201d he said, feeling a bit frightened that he could not account for his actions.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWell, never mind\u2026it\u2019ll come to ya, after ya more rested,\u201d Clyde said, trying to comfort the confused stranger.<\/p>\n<p>Ben poked at his food. Something deep down inside of him, gnawed at his subconscious, but he couldn\u2019t put a finger on what it might be. He tried to think back to the day before, trying to recall what it was he was doing when he had fallen and was injured, but nothing came to mind.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYa best eat, Mr. Cartwright, ya food\u2019s gettin\u2019 cold,\u201d Clara stated.<\/p>\n<p>Ben glanced over at the woman with an apologetic look on his face.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes\u2026I\u2019m sorry,\u201d he said, taking a bite. For moment longer, Ben played with his food, pushing the eggs around in a circle. \u201cI\u2019m not really hungry,\u201d he stated after a short period of time. He pushed back his plate and stood up.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI thank you for your help, and for the breakfast, but I must be going,\u201d Ben said as he stepped the short distance across the room and began gathering his things.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhere ya be heading?\u201d Clyde questioned.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHome, I suppose\u2026say, would happen to have a horse I could borrow\u2026I\u2019ll pay you for it?\u201d Ben asked.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSure, we got a saddle horse, but\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The door opened at that moment and Henry entered the room, dusting himself off. Ben turned to stare at the young man. His expression was blank as he watched Henry\u2019s movements.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cMr. Cartwright, this is my son, Henry. Say hello to the gentleman, boy,\u201d ordered Clyde, pointing in Ben\u2019s direction.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHowdy Mr. Cartwright. Glad to see ya up and around. Ya sure took a tumble,\u201d Henry said cordially.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDid you say, son?\u201d Ben asked.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes\u2026why, is something wrong?\u201d Clyde said, stepping forward.<\/p>\n<p>The expression on Ben\u2019s face changed suddenly and he jerked his head upward. His eyes rounded and a dark flash of fear flickered in their depths.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cMr. Cartwright,\u201d Clyde said, placing a hand on Ben\u2019s arm.<\/p>\n<p>He could feel the tremors that caused Ben\u2019s body to shake.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cMy son\u2026Joseph, he\u2019s been hurt!\u201d Ben declared.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat? Ya ain\u2019t makin\u2019 sense again\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben looked frantic. He grasped Clyde\u2019s arm and pulled him near.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYesterday, early, my son and I were tracking a puma. The cat attacked Joe, injuring him. I had to leave him and go for help!\u201d Ben practically shouted.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYa sayin\u2019, ya left your boy up there on that mountain, all alone, hurt?\u201d stammered Clara.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI had to, there was no way to get him down. I need help\u2026please,\u201d Ben said as he headed for the door. \u201cWe need a wagon, medical supplies, water, blankets\u2026please\u2026won\u2019t you help me? Joe was in a bad way,\u201d Ben said running out the door.<\/p>\n<p>Clyde and Henry followed, watching Ben in his frantic maneuvers.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHe might even be\u2026dead\u2026by now!\u201d Ben yelled.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAlright, Mr. Cartwright, we\u2019ll help ya. Henry, hitch up the wagon, Clara, get the medical supplies and blankets, and pack some food. Come on Mr. Cartwright, let\u2019s you and I saddle the ridin\u2019 horse, you take him and me and my boy will follow you in the wagon.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben let the wind expel from his lungs as he grabbed Clyde by both shoulders.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you\u2026and God bless you!\u201d<br \/>\nJoe woke from his stupor with every portion of his body in pain. His brow was coated in sweat and though he was hot, he shivered with the fever that had over night consumed his body. Painfully, Joe pushed aside a portion of the barrier that his father had created to protect him and crawled from the protection of the rock overhang.<\/p>\n<p>The morning air was cool and crisp and for a period, Joe felt some relief from the heat his body produced. When he was able, Joe tried to sit up and take in his surroundings. Confusion was a constant companion and did nothing to help the ailing young man.<\/p>\n<p>Joe managed to get to his feet, with the help of the rifle as a crutch. He scanned the area, not sure where he was or why he was hurting in such a manner. Nor did he have a clue as to where his father had gone. The only two things he was sure about was his ravishing thirst for water and that he was very much alone in a world he did not understand.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa!\u201d he called out in a strained voice. \u201cWhere are you?\u201d he said, staggering as he tried to move along the rocks.<\/p>\n<p>Joe leaned heavily on his would-be crutch, staggering with each step he made and clenching his jaw tight against the pain that threatened to overwhelm him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa\u2026\u201d Joe cried, gasping for breath.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHe\u2019ll come\u2026back\u2026he\u2019ll come back\u2026\u201d Joe repeated several times before stumbling and falling.<\/p>\n<p>With the fall, came a shrill cry of distress as Joe began rolling down the embankment. His body came to an abrupt halt after smashing into the trunk of a large tree. Eyes misted with burning tears as Joe\u2019s feverish body lay wrapped about the tree in an excruciating fashion.<\/p>\n<p>Blood that had stopped seeping began to seep again from the injuries acquired the day before. Only for a fraction of a second did the wounded man feel the warmth of the blood as it oozed from the cuts and gashes.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHurts\u2026\u201d whimpered Joe, closing his eyes. \u201cPlease God\u2026don\u2019t let\u2026me die\u2026like this,\u201d<br \/>\nJoe mumbled, \u201cnot\u2026alone\u2026not without\u2026Pa.\u201d His voice was silenced when another wave of pain took him back into his reclusive place of tranquility.<\/p>\n<p>Ben was still a little shaky after riding for so long, but he urged the others onward. His heart was set on saving his son and as he rode along he continued to pray that Joe had survived the night. Fear\u2019s fingers wrapped around his heart, but Ben determined to will it away. He had let fear rule him once, he vowed now that it would never happen again.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHang on, Joe,\u201d he whispered into the breeze. \u201cHurry,\u201d he called over his shoulder to Clyde and Henry who were riding in the wagon. \u201cIt\u2019s not much further,\u201d Ben shouted.<\/p>\n<p>They reached the spot where Clyde and Henry had found Ben and stopped there for a while to rest the horses. Ben was anxiously looking up at the sun and after only a brief spell, he urged the others to continue.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWe have to hurry,\u201d he said as he swung into the saddle.<\/p>\n<p>Ben didn\u2019t wait for Clyde to help Clara into the wagon. In stead he kicked at the old horse\u2019s sides, wishing that he were riding Buck rather than the old plug he was forced to ride.<\/p>\n<p>By the time that Ben had reached the little clearing where he and Joe had left their horses, the old horse he was riding, stood huffing and puffing to regain his breath. Ben swung down from the saddle, ignoring the discomfort in his muscles and rushed toward the steep incline.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHe\u2019s up here!\u201d shouted Ben, already beginning to climb up to where he had left Joe.<\/p>\n<p>Ben scurried up the sharp incline, leaving Henry and Clyde to make their own way. He cared little for the small insignificant scrapes and bruises that marred his flesh, only that he reach his son before death had a chance to snatch from him, what he loved most.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJOE!\u201d he called as he topped the summit and ran to the rocks where he had lain his son.<\/p>\n<p>Ben stopped suddenly, seeing that the barrier had been moved and now lay scattered about. His heart leapt into his throat and Ben felt his stomach begin to churn with fear.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoseph,\u201d Ben sobbed as he grabbed the remaining brush and began tossing it to the side. \u201cDear God\u2026son\u2026where are you!\u201d Ben said, his voice beginning to rise in volume.<\/p>\n<p>Ben grabbed the pistol he found lying where he had placed it and picked it up. He twirled around, looking all about. On the ground he found tiny droplets of blood that had dried and turned brown from the heat of the sun. Slowly, Ben began to follow the trail, leading away from the site where Joe had been safe.<\/p>\n<p>Clyde and Henry reached the top just as Ben neared the opposite edge of the incline. Clyde sat the items that he carried down, and hurried over to Ben\u2019s side. The look on Ben\u2019s face frightened Clyde and he glanced back at his son, motioning for him to come over.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat\u2019s wrong, Ben\u2026where\u2019s the boy?\u201d Clyde said, afraid for this stranger who looked as if he had just lost his best friend.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI don\u2019t know,\u201d Ben whispered. \u201cHe was over there.\u201d Ben pointed to Joe\u2019s hideaway. \u201cBut he must have been able to get up\u2026and now he\u2019s wondered off\u2026and he\u2019s bleeding. I followed the blood splatters this far\u2026\u201d he muttered. Ben\u2019s voice trailed off into a whisper.<\/p>\n<p>Clyde searched the area below them with care. After a moment, he grabbed Ben by the arm, and pointed down the slope.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLooky there, Ben\u2026!\u201d he said excitedly. \u201cNext to that big pine, ya can barely make out a body\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJOSEPH!\u201d screamed Ben as he started down the far side of the rocks. \u201cHenry, make a stretcher, Clyde, come with me,\u201d he called over his shoulder. \u201cBring the canteen!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Once more, Ben began a downhill climb, adding to his many scrapes and bruises in his quest to save his son. As he reached the tree where Joe\u2019s body lay wrapped about the trunk, he slowed his pace giving himself a moment to catch his breath and steady his nerves.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOh, Joseph,\u201d Ben said, bending over the once energetic young man who had always brought such joy and love to his father\u2019s heart. Tenderly, Ben ran his hands over the crumbled body that now seemed so lifeless that the sight of the battered face turned his stomach.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoe,\u201d the anguished father pleaded with the unconscious boy. \u201cPa\u2019s here now, son. I\u2019m going to take you out of this place\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cMr. Cartwright?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Clyde had come upon Ben and stood over the father and son, offering Ben the canteen.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you, Clyde,\u201d Ben said, gently laying Joe down and taking the canteen.<\/p>\n<p>He pulled his neckerchief from around his neck and dampened it with the cool water. With hands that trembled, Ben washed part of the collected grim from Joe\u2019s face. Joe began to move his lips, his words were garbled and Ben could not understand what Joe was trying to say.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHe\u2019s wakin\u2019 up, Mr. Cartwright,\u201d Clyde said, squatting down next to Ben. \u201cHe\u2019s hurt bad, sir, we best get him out of here for it gets dark and we have\u2019ta stay.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, you\u2019re right. Hand me those blankets and we\u2019ll wrap him up. He\u2019s begun to shiver,\u201d Ben instructed. \u201cAs soon as Henry gets the stretcher ready, we\u2019ll move him.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>While they waited for Henry to bring the stretcher, Ben cleaned the wound to Joe\u2019s shoulder and the deep cuts on both arms. Joe\u2019s eyes opened briefly and when he spied his father bending over him, he forced a smile.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m here son,\u201d soothed Ben. \u201cYou rest, I\u2019ll have you out of here in no time.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben could see the pain etched into every line across Joe\u2019s brow and his heart bled with sympathy for his son\u2019s suffering. Guilt gnawed away at his insides as he watched Joe brave the waves of pain that rippled through his body.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2026knew\u2026you\u2019d come\u2026back,\u201d Joe managed to whisper.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI said I would, nothing would have stopped me, Joe\u2026nothing short of my own death,\u201d muttered Ben, clinging to Joe\u2019s hand as if his very life depended on the way that father and son clung to one another.<\/p>\n<p>Joe\u2019s eyes closed. \u201cI\u2026know,\u201d he murmured.<\/p>\n<p>It took nearly an hour for the three men to get Joe back up the incline carrying the stretcher and fighting the rolling stones and pebbles that made the climb so treacherous. Going down the opposite side to the wagon, where Clara waited with the medical supplies and bandages, took almost as long. Finally at the bottom of the steep slope, Joe was loaded into the back of the wagon so that Clara and Ben could tend to the wounds in a more proper manner.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHenry, ya take the ridin\u2019 horse and ride into Carson City and fetch back the doctor. Ya ma and Mr. Cartwright and me, we\u2019ll take the boy back to the house. Meet us there and don\u2019t dilly dally around, this here boy needs lookin\u2019 after, ya hear?\u201d Clyde ordered.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes sir\u2026I mean no sir, I won\u2019t dally \u2018round, honest Pa.\u201d Henry was mounted up and riding off toward town before either Clyde or Ben could comment.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI think we\u2019re ready now,\u201d Ben stated. \u201cI\u2019ll ride back here with my son.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAlrighty, Mr. Cartwright.\u201d Clyde helped Clara into the seat next to him and then slapped the reins down on the horse\u2019s broad rump. \u201cGiddyup horse.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>It seemed to Ben that Clyde managed to hit every rut and hole in the long road back to his place. Joe moaned and cried out each time the wagon took a dip and then straightened up onto smoother ground. Ben whispered words of comfort to his son, knowing that Joe, in his state of oblivion, could not possibly hear him. But Ben had the need to speak the words. As the concerned father wrestled with his guilt and the anguished expressions on his son\u2019s face, the wagon moved forward, mile after mile.<\/p>\n<p>The doctor was standing with Henry on the front porch when Clyde drove the wagon into the yard. The old gentleman helped his wife down from her perch on the wagon seat while the doctor approached Ben at the rear of the wagon.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHe\u2019s hurt badly, doctor,\u201d Ben explained as he kneeled over Joe\u2019s silent form.<\/p>\n<p>The doctor, a young man, not much older than Adam climbed into the back with Ben and kneeled down on the opposite side of Joe. Carefully, he pulled back the blanket that covered Joe. Ben heard the man gasp.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHow did this happen?\u201d he questioned the worried father.<\/p>\n<p>Immediately, the physician checked Joe\u2019s pulse and felt for fever. \u201cHe\u2019s burning up,\u201d he said before Ben had a chance to answer his question.<\/p>\n<p>Quickly he ran his gentle hands down both sides of Joe\u2019s ribcage, his eyes closed as he allowed his fingers to make a silent diagnosis of his patient.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHelp me get him into the house,\u201d he instructed Ben as he replaced the blanket. \u201cBe careful, he has some cracked or broken ribs.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cMrs. Logan, please, if you wouldn\u2019t mind fixing the boy a bed?\u201d the doctor requested. \u201cClyde, you and Henry help\u2026I\u2019m sorry, I didn\u2019t get your name?\u201d he said, turning to Ben.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cCartwright, Ben Cartwright,\u201d Ben said, shaking hands with the physician.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cReece, James Reece,\u201d the doctor said, introducing himself. He turned his attention back to the others. \u201cClyde, you and Henry come over here and help us get Mr. Cartwright\u2019s son into the house, please.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>It was only a matter of minutes before the four men had Joe resting on the same cot that Ben had occupied when Clyde and Henry had found him and brought him home to tend his injuries. The doctor quickly instructed Clara on the things he needed and what he required of her in the way of being his nurse. The others, he politely ordered out of the house.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll call for you Mr. Cartwright, as soon as I\u2019ve finished tending to your son\u2019s wounds. Try not to worry, from what I\u2019ve already seen, the worst thing we need fear at this point is the fever. The cuts on his arms are not infected as yet and don\u2019t seem to be as serious as I had first anticipated them to be. The gunshot wound is deep, but not serious, looks as if the bullet missed him and only cut a gash in his shoulder. The ribs, well, binding them is about all I can do for them, and then I\u2019ll give your son something to help with the pain and to aid him in getting the proper rest needed. Now, if you gentlemen will excuse me, I best get started.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you doctor\u2026you will call, if he happens to wake and ask for me?\u201d Ben said, glancing down at his son as a mixture of emotions flooded his soul.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, I promise,\u201d Dr. Reece said, giving Ben a comforting pat on the back. \u201cNow, I do believe that your son needs me.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cCertainly\u2026I\u2019ll be\u2026outside,\u201d Ben said gravely.<\/p>\n<p>The weary father walked to the little cot and leaned down, brushing Joe\u2019s cheek tenderly with the back of his fingers. His voice, when he spoke was low and filled with deep emotion. A sob caught in the back of his throat as he put into words, his sympathy and remorse.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoseph,\u201d he whispered, \u201cI\u2019m so sorry, sweetheart\u2026for what I\u2019ve cost you.\u201d Ben took a deep breath and continued. \u201cThe doctor\u2019s here now, and he\u2019s going to make you feel better. I\u2019ll be right out side if you should want me.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa?\u201d Joe murmured in a wee voice.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cShh\u2026everything\u2019s going to be alright, Joseph, I promise you,\u201d Ben said.<\/p>\n<p>Ben leaned closer and placed his lips against the boy\u2019s brow in a quick kiss and whispered. \u201cI love you, son\u2026I need you to get better!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben stood, his eyes lingering on Joe\u2019s face and the painful express he wore. When Dr. Reece, touched his arm, Ben managed to pull his eyes away from the sight and walked from the house without a word.<br \/>\nBen busied himself with helping his hosts with their evening chores. Mr. Logan tried to make small talk to wile away the time, but Ben was so lost in his private torment that he failed to pay any attention to what was being said. After several attempts, Clyde gave up and went about his work.<\/p>\n<p>Though he tried, Ben could not wipe the memory from his mind of his son\u2019s scream for help when the mountain lion attacked him. Nor could he force from his memory the picture of Joe\u2019s crumbled body when it had finally stopped rolling down the incline. Ben recalled the horror he felt when he imagined Joe\u2019s body hit the trunk of the tree with a loud thud, and the soft whimpers of agony that Joe had tried so hard to keep silent, but had failed.<\/p>\n<p>Guilt ate away at Ben\u2019s conscious. Why had he allowed a nightmare, a dream, to rule him as he had? Why hadn\u2019t he been able to push the hellish picture from his mind, use his common sense and insist that Joe go on the cattle drive? At least there, he would have been safe from the sharp claws of that devil cat!<\/p>\n<p>Ben pinched his lips tightly; self-loathing caused him to tremble with both anger at himself and regret for what he deemed his own lack of faith. Faith, thought Ben, he had so little. He shook his head in disgust, wishing it were he, who was fighting so hard to stay alive, instead of his son. Ben expelled a long sigh and returned to his chore.<\/p>\n<p>The trio had just finished in the barn, mucking out the stalls and spreading fresh hay when Ben, catching a movement in the doorway, looked up. Mrs. Logan smiled at him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThe doctor would like a word with you, Mr. Cartwright,\u201d she said in her soft buoyant tone.<\/p>\n<p>Ben felt his heart begin to race. As he turned to leave the barn, he paused to speak to Clara.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you for all you\u2019ve done for my son and I\u2026I can\u2019t\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Clara smiled and placed her hand over Ben\u2019s arm. \u201cThere\u2019s no need\u2026now go, your son is asking for you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben ran the short distance to the house, pausing at the door to catch his breath. Fear\u2019s fingers tangled themselves about his pounding heart as he took a deep breath to steady himself. Would Joe blame him for his suffering? \u2018I wouldn\u2019t blame you if you did, son,\u2019 Ben whispered to himself. \u2018It was my fault\u2026\u2019<\/p>\n<p>\u201cMr. Cartwright,\u201d Dr. Reece met Ben at the door.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHow is he?\u201d Ben said, his eyes straining to see beyond the guilt wall that had been spread across the rope holding it above the floor. \u201cIs he going to be alright? When can I see him?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPlease, Mr. Cartwright\u2026your son is very weak, he\u2019s in a great deal of pain, but I\u2019ve given him a sedative to help him rest. He\u2019s going to be fine, in time. He\u2019s had a terrible experience to say the least. The cat that attacked him, obviously was a young cat, inexperienced at attacking its prey. The cuts on Joseph\u2019s arms are not as deep as first thought and I doubt once they heal, if he will even have a scar to brag about,\u201d the doctor said lightly.<\/p>\n<p>Ben sighed in relief and was relaxed a little by the doctor\u2019s cheerful mood.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI did bind the ribs\u2026your son put up quite a fuss over that, I might add. But I won the argument, and he did promise to stay in bed. The bullet wound on his shoulder was deep, and I had to take a few stitches. We\u2019ll have to watch it for a few days to be certain that it heals properly. Unfortunately, he will be unable to use it for a while, but with lots of rest and a good sling it should not present a problem. Other than several hard knocks and a colorful array of bruises, I\u2019d say you could take your son home in\u2026hmm about a week,\u201d smiled Dr. Logan.<\/p>\n<p>Ben grinned from ear to ear and grabbed the physician\u2019s hand, pumping it up and down.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you\u2026thank you very much, Doctor.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWe\u2019ll keep an eye on that fever, which is normal under the circumstances and should be gone in a day or so\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa\u2026is that\u2026you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou best go to him, the medicine I gave him will have him sound asleep very shortly.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you again,\u201d Ben smiled as he pushed aside the curtain that separated him from the son whom he loved more than life.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben pulled a chair to the side of the bed and took Joe\u2019s hand in his, leaning close. Joe\u2019s eyes were closed, but when he felt the tender touch of his father\u2019s hand holding his, he opened his eyes slightly.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHi.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHi yourself, young man. Do you know what a fright you gave me?\u201d smiled Ben, fighting to control the overwhelming desire to cry in relief.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSorry\u2026Pa,\u201d muttered Joe, swallowing and grimacing. \u201cI didn\u2019t see that cat\u2026until he hit me.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI know son\u2026there\u2019s no need for you to be sorry, it wasn\u2019t your fault. It was\u2026mine\u2026I should have been in front, not you. You shouldn\u2019t be lying there\u2026I should\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe moved his head to the side and stared up at his father. His eyes, he struggled to keep open.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo\u2026Pa\u2026you didn\u2019t know\u2026neither of us knew\u2026where that puma was\u2026\u201d Joe swallowed again, his eyes seemed to be getting heavier and he was fighting against the medication that was given to him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNot your fault\u2026or\u2026mine\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe\u2019s sense of reality slipped away and he drifted into forgetfulness as the drug took affect. Ben frowned when he realized that Joe had fallen to sleep. He arranged the covers around Joe and then stood up.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll be close by son,\u201d he told the sleeping boy.<\/p>\n<p>Ben slipped from the house, leaving the family to their evening meal. He had the need to be alone, to ponder the doubts that plagued his sub-conscience. Try as he might, Ben was unable to release the ideal that he was responsible for his youngest son\u2019s injuries, and the thought haunted him, far into the night, and would in the days ahead.<br \/>\nBy the end of the week, Joe was in better shape to travel, and given the word, he was more than ready to get home.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhen can we leave, Pa?\u201d he asked for the hundredth time it seemed to his father.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSoon, Joseph, soon,\u201d Ben repeated the same answer over and over. \u201cNow, don\u2019t ask me again, understand?\u201d he growled.<\/p>\n<p>His tone was sharp, and the severity of his words caught Joe\u2019s attention. The astonished young man stared in wonder at his father and for the first time, noticed the hardened lines in Ben\u2019s face. Joe was puzzled by the change he witnessed. For days now, Ben had been devoted to his every need, dotting over him like a mother hen over her flock, but now, it seemed as if his father was\u2026angry with him for some unknown reason. Some reason, for which he had no clue.<\/p>\n<p>Joe lowered his head, unable to look into his father\u2019s eyes, afraid of what he might find. Ben heard the deep breath that Joe expelled and he, himself, did the same.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m sorry son, I didn\u2019t mean to snap at you,\u201d Ben said, coming to the edge of the bed and pulling up the chair to sit.<\/p>\n<p>Joe raised his head slowly, glancing at his father.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat\u2019s wrong, Pa\u2026did I do something to make you angry at me?\u201d Joe said in an apologetic voice.<\/p>\n<p>Ben could only shake his head. How could he tell his son that it was himself that he was angry at, and not the boy and certainly not anything that Joe had done?<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoseph\u2026please, just forget it. We\u2019ll go home very soon, I promise. In fact, Clyde is getting us a wagon from one of his neighbors so that you don\u2019t have to ride your horse home. You\u2019ll be much more comfortable\u2026and then I can send a couple of the men back with the wagon and\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBut what\u2019s wrong\u2026why are you suddenly so\u2026angry?\u201d Joe continued to probe.<\/p>\n<p>Ben took a deep breath, stealing himself against the guilty feelings that surfaced every time he was close to his son and was forced to view the cuts and scrapes, the bruises and the expressions of discomfort that he knew Joe was trying to hide from him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m not mad!\u201d Ben rose, turning his back to his son.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI don\u2019t believe you,\u201d Joe dared.<\/p>\n<p>The words caused Ben to spin around and glare at the boy.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHow dare you accuse me of lying!\u201d he blurted out. \u201cJust who do you think you are?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe pushed aside the blanket that lay across him and stood to his feet. The look on his father&#8217;s face worried him, his father\u2019s actions and Ben\u2019s tone of voice, frightened him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m sorry, sir\u2026I didn\u2019t mean to insinuate that you were lying\u2026I know you don\u2019t lie\u2026I\u2019m sorry, Pa,\u201d Joe said.<\/p>\n<p>He felt the swelling of his throat and prayed that he wouldn\u2019t break down. But he was so tired, so weakened both physically and mentally by what he\u2019d been through, that he could do nothing to stop his chin from quivering and his eyes from filling with tears.<\/p>\n<p>Ben\u2019s mind cleared and he saw the emotional state that Joe was in and knew instantly that the boy was bordering on a breakdown. Immediately, Ben moved closer and placed a hand on Joe\u2019s shoulder. His facial expression softened and he smiled down.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s not you, son\u2026honest. It\u2019s me that I\u2019m angry with\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe\u2019s emerald eyes sought his father\u2019s face. There was a hunger that gleamed in the dark depths.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBut why, Pa? You didn\u2019t do anything\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDidn\u2019t I?\u201d Ben said, the hardness returning to wipe away the tenderness.<\/p>\n<p>He turned and walked away, leaving his back to his son. They were alone in the small house, just the two of them. Clyde had gone in search of a wagon for them to use and Henry was busy tending to chores. Clara Logan was hanging out the laundry to dry.<\/p>\n<p>Ben spun around, a scowl across his forehead. His usual loving eyes were dark with fire.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou could have been killed out there,\u201d he shouted, pointing with his finger to indicate the location. \u201cAnd you darn well, nearly were\u2026and it was my fault\u2026my fault!\u201d he continued to storm.<\/p>\n<p>Joe was shaking his head, unable to comprehend just how his father could claim credit for what happened to him. It was an accident; it could have happened to anyone, even Ben, had he been in the lead!<\/p>\n<p>\u201cStop it, Pa!\u201d Joe spouted. \u201cYou know as well as I do that it was an accident, that it could have just as easily been you that cat attacked\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBut it wasn\u2019t! It was you\u2026and because of my foolishness, it darn near cost you your life\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt didn\u2019t\u2026look at me, Pa!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe moved across the room where Ben had walked and stood in front of his father.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLook at me,\u201d he repeated. \u201cI\u2019m alive\u2026we\u2019re both alive\u2026and\u2026I don\u2019t blame you\u2026surely you can\u2019t think that I\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben\u2019s eyes sought his son\u2019s face as once again his features softened.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOf course not, Joe,\u201d he said, his voice soft. \u201cI know you don\u2019t blame me, but I blame me\u2026I let my own fears rule me, son.\u201d Ben turned away again. \u201cThat nightmare I\u2019d been having, I let it consume me with the fear of losing you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben turned back to Joe, grasping gently his son\u2019s arm.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ve lost so much over the years\u2026and I\u2019ve been able to rise above the grief, somehow. But Joe, just the thoughts that\u2026something might happen to you\u2026just thinking how difficult it would be, to go on living\u2026without you\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>A sob washed Ben\u2019s words back down his throat as he stared into the eyes that reflected his own impassioned candor.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa, don\u2019t you think I understand how you feel? For years, growing up, after my mother died, I lived in fear that every time you had to go away something would happen to you and you\u2019d never come back to me. I was like a lost soul, I cried myself to sleep every night you were gone and I prayed and prayed all day that you&#8217;d come home. I don\u2019t know what would have happened to me back then, Pa\u2026if you\u2026never came back to me. I\u2026\u201d Joe sniffed his nose and then continued.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAnd then one day, you told me, you said, \u2018son, we cannot let our fears rule everyday of our lives. What will happen, will happen. We have to remember that only God has control and that we have to learn to trust on Him.\u2019 You remember saying that to me, don\u2019t you?\u201d Joe asked. \u201cYou haven\u2019t given up your faith, have you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben could not find the words to answer the question. He stared, wide-eyed at his son, shaking his head gently to and fro.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou over reacted to a nightmare, Pa\u2026that\u2019s all. And I understand why you did, because you\u2026love me.\u201d Joe had to swallow down the thickness that threatened to choke off his words.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou acted out of love\u2026you always have, Pa\u2026always. Don\u2019t you see\u2026I could have been hurt just as easily if I had gone on that cattle drive as I was here trying to keep out of harm\u2019s way? What happened, happened\u2026it was inevitable\u2026the place, or the action, had nothing to do with fate. It was inevitable, Pa, I was destined to be injured but not because you tried to keep me safe, and not because I didn\u2019t go on a cattle drive.<\/p>\n<p>You told me once, Pa, that when our time came to die, we would die. Nothing could change the number of days, the hours or the months and weeks we are allotted here on earth. That each one of us has a certain amount of time, some more, some less\u2026but when our name was drawn, and it is our time, then that was it. You said that God didn\u2019t promise how or when, only that death was inevitable.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe smiled at his father. \u201cIt wasn\u2019t my time to die, obviously, but maybe God was trying to tell me something\u2026like slow down\u2026don\u2019t take life at a full run\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben couldn\u2019t help but return the smile. He felt much as he pictured Joe had felt, during the times he had been the one giving the lectures and Joe had been made to stand and listen. A reversal of roles, thought Ben. As he did so, he slipped his arm about Joe\u2019s neck and pulled his son close to him. For several moments the two stood, locked in the embrace.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSomeday Joseph, you are going to be a wonderful father\u2026I\u2019m glad to know you have been listening to me all these years after all,\u201d Ben laughed lightly.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI had a good teacher, Pa\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben\u2019s eyes misted, but he willed away the happy tears. His expression softened and a more contented look took away the scowls and gentleness replaced the hardened look.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you, son\u2026thank you,\u201d Ben murmured in his deep voice.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo\u2026thank you, Pa\u2026for\u2026loving me, and giving me the wisdom that I need to be more\u2026like you,\u201d smiled Joe, his merry eyes twinkling.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoe\u2026I know you will be the best possible man that you can be\u2026that\u2019s all I\u2019ve ever asked of any of my sons. But remember, you have to be yourself, you can never be me\u2026you can never walk in my shoes, or experience the exact things in your life that I\u2019ve experienced in mine. I\u2019m honored that you feel as you do, and I want you to know that I\u2019m proud of you, very proud\u2026but if I had lost you\u2026I could never have forgiven myself. Now\u2026enough said\u2026what say we go home?\u201d Ben smiled happily.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAlright, Pa\u2026I\u2019m ready to go home\u2026I can\u2019t wait until Hoss and Adam get back. Just wait until they hear about how I wrestled that mountain lion all the way down Montpelier Gorge ,\u201d he laughed, walking with his father out into the bright sunlight.<\/p>\n<p>Ben grinned, shaking his head from side to side. \u201cJoseph, what am I going to do with you?\u201d he snickered.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWell, Pa\u2026we don\u2019t gotta tell them which one of us won that wrestling match, do we?\u201d Joe said with a twinkle in his eye.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLook at you\u2026do you think we\u2019ll have to?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe giggled, \u201cit\u2019s that noticeable, heh?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben slipped his arm about Joe\u2019s shoulders and grinned down at the boy.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m afraid so, son\u2026I\u2019m afraid so.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>THE END<br \/>\nAugust 2004<\/p>\n<div class=\"pvc_clear\"><\/div>\n<p id=\"pvc_stats_12097\" class=\"pvc_stats all  \" data-element-id=\"12097\" style=\"\"><i class=\"pvc-stats-icon medium\" aria-hidden=\"true\"><svg 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