Summary:<\/b>\u00a0After unsuccessfully trying to lure Little Joe into a shoot-out, seventeen-year-old Lonnie Stokes discovers a way to make the youngest Cartwright answer his challenge.<\/p>\n
Rated PG \u00a0WC 14,000<\/p>\n
Too Many Fast Guns<\/strong><\/p>\n The street was lined with spectators<\/strong> all waiting to see what the youngest member of the Cartwright clan was aiming on doing. They wanted a showdown, but not me\u2026I\u2019m the youngest member of that Cartwright clan and I had no intentions of answering the challenge made by the young punk outside.<\/p>\n I remained at the bar and continued to sip my beer. The foam on the top had died and the ale was too warm for my liking, but I knew if I moved to go outside where the big-mouthed kid waited for me, someone would die. And I wasn\u2019t aiming on that somebody to be me, but I wasn\u2019t so sure I could outdraw him either. The boy was young, two years younger than I am and I\u2019m only nineteen. He\u2019s been dogging me for over a week now, ever since he\u2019d rode into town and singled me out. My older brother, Adam, said he had seen the stranger the day of the shooting match late last week. The kid was watching from the sidelines, as if summing up all of us that were participating in the little event. It was all for fun, a few bets were made as to who was the fastest draw among a few of us young bucks. Luck was, I managed to outdraw the others and claimed the $50 prize money. No one seemed bothered by the fact, most were already aware that I was pretty quick on the draw so nothing was said when I walked away with the loot. No one was angry and we all marched down the street together kidding one another and laughing as we went into the saloon where I bought a round of drinks for all the boys.<\/p>\n I thought that was the end of it, but then later that afternoon while in the Silver Dollar Saloon, this kid comes in and starts harassing me. I saw right off that he was young, and cocky\u2026sort of reminded me of myself back a couple years ago. Then the name-calling started but I ignored him for as long as I could, I even managed to hold my temper in check when he called me a yellow-bellied coward. I bristled though and Adam must have sensed it because it was about that time that he suggested we head on home. When I hesitated, he placed his arm about my shoulders in a brotherly way and everyone standing nearby thought nothing was out of the norm, but the pressure I felt as my brother squeezed told me that I\u2019d be wise to do as he suggested. So, I conceded, tipped my hat at the stranger and we left. As Adam and I stood at the hitching post ready to mount up, the kid, followed by the patrons inside, all moved outside onto the boardwalk. I\u2019d already swung up into the saddle and turned Cochise toward home when the kid yelled out at me that \u2018there\u2019ll be another day\u2019\u2026<\/p>\n I pulled my horse to a stop and turned around. I noted the fiery glow in his eyes and the thought flashed through my head that this kid, whose name I learned later was Lonnie Stokes, could kill me in a blink of an eye and have no regrets. The vision I saw then of me lying dead in the street and my father bent weeping over my body, sent shivers of dread\u2026or maybe it was fear\u2026racing through my veins. Lonnie stepped down off the boardwalk and took the stance, eyeing my every mood. I saw the tips of his long slender fingers brush the butt of his Colt 45 that rested easily on his hip. His piercing eyes never moved from my face. He was actually hoping that I\u2019d be stupid enough to make a play for my gun. I\u2019ll admit, it unnerved me some, his being so young yet so daringly explicit in his demands.<\/p>\n \u201cJoe\u2026let\u2019s go\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I recalled how hard it was to swallow, but I nodded my head at my challenger a second time and muttered something stupid like, \u2018not today\u2019 and then turned and rode out of town. Pa and I were at his desk, he sitting behind in his chair while I was sitting on the edge of the wide mahogany desktop. Pa had found out about Lonnie Stokes from Adam and since had about worried himself into a condition. I had been trying to assure him that I wasn\u2019t going to start anything with the kid\u2026after all, I told my father, Lonnie was just a boy\u2026I couldn\u2019t very well go about town getting into shoot outs with boys. Pa gave me one of \u2018those\u2019 looks cause he didn\u2019t think it was funny or that he\u2019d found anything amusing about the situation. Well, hell\u2026I hadn\u2019t either. I didn\u2019t tell my father, but the boy worried me some, probably more than he should have.<\/p>\n That wasn\u2019t to say I was afraid of him, I\u2019ve met very few men that I actually feared. Take my brothers for instance. There\u2019s Hoss, he\u2019s just a big old easy going fellow, compassionate and kind to just about everybody\u2026except when he\u2019s riled. It takes a lot to rile him, but when he gets mad\u2026you\u2019d better stay clear. His fists are huge and he\u2019s as strong as an ox, if he ever hit you, it wasn\u2019t likely you\u2019d be jumping up right away. Most folks here about know him as the gentle giant, which he is. Strangers usually take one look at him and avoid him, cause he looks big and mean, but he ain\u2019t, not really, least ways to me and my family he ain\u2019t. But because of his strength and the power he packs, he could put the fear of God in a man; I\u2019ve seen him do it a few times myself.<\/p>\n Then there\u2019s Adam. If he weren\u2019t my brother, and if I didn\u2019t know him as well as I do, I\u2019d probably have to count him as one of those men I\u2019d fear. He has a temper\u2026sort of a dark side to his personally, at least to those who don\u2019t know him well. And he\u2019s quiet, which is unnerving to some men. His eyes say it all, when he\u2019s mad and he looks directly at you\u2026shoot, I can barely keep from squirming myself when he looks at me like he does when he\u2019s mad at me about something. Yep, most men walk softly when my older brother\u2019s around and avoid him like the plague when he\u2019s out of sorts. It\u2019s the wisest thing to do, if you want to live another day.<\/p>\n But it was different with Lonnie Stokes. He was nothing like Adam or Hoss. They take it to heart when they\u2019ve been forced to kill a man, especially Hoss with his big tender heart and all. Adam broods over things but Hoss is open with his emotions and takes everything personal. He hates any sort of arguing or fussing and rarely takes part in it, unless pushed into it. The boy, Lonnie Stokes, he strikes me as the type of young man that would take pleasure in killing someone. There\u2019s something about the kid that\u2019s unsettling and causes me to wonder exactly how many men, if any, that he\u2019s already killed\u2026and why. I mean, he certainly tried his best to draw me into a gun fight with him and for no good reason other than he wanted to prove he was better\u2019n me\u2026and faster. I wonder if he used the same excuses on the other men he\u2019s had showdowns with. Doesn\u2019t seem like much of a reason to want to kill a man. Pa says men like that just get a thrill from killing; they don\u2019t have to have a reason. It\u2019s as if they enjoy watching a man die. It sickens me.<\/p>\n That\u2019s how it was in the beginning, when Lonnie Stokes walked into our lives, changing us forever. As I sit here with my brother Adam, watching him struggling just to stay alive, I don\u2019t think about how many men Stokes might have killed, I only think about whether or not my brother is going to live\u2026or die. I think back to that day when Stokes called me out and instead of me meeting him in the street, Adam was there\u2026taking a bullet in the back that should have been in mine. I feel like it\u2019s my fault that Adam is where he is right now. I\u2019m not sure I\u2019ll be able to live with myself if he should\u2026die\u2026he laid his life on the line for me and though he meant well, it leaves a gnawing guilt down in the bottom of my gut that I\u2019m not sure I\u2019ll ever be able to forget. One thing for certain though, and I\u2019ll never tell Pa or Hoss this, but if Adam dies\u2026that boy\u2019s gonna die too.<\/p>\n \u201cI promise Adam, Lonnie Stokes is gonna pay for what he\u2019s done to you\u2026to me\u2026to our family\u2026I give you my word!\u201d \u201cHe is fast Little Joe,\u201d Adam announced as he strapped on his gun, \u201cRoy Coffee saw him showing off and said he\u2019s never seen a man faster\u2026ever\u2026that\u2019s why I\u2019m riding into town with you\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I remember how that announcement made me feel a bit like Adam thought I was too immature to handle the situation and I remember letting him know how I felt.<\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t need a babysitter big brother\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNo, you don\u2019t\u2026I didn\u2019t mean to imply that you did\u2026I have to go into town anyway to see Herb Larson about that new holster I ordered, so I might as well ride in with you,\u201d Adam had hurried to explain. \u201cBesides, I\u2019d like the company.\u201d<\/p>\n I couldn\u2019t help but cast off my anger, I could tell by the lopsided dimpled grin on my older brother\u2019s face that he meant what he said, so I agreed, pushing thoughts of Lonnie outta my head for the time being.<\/p>\n \u201cAlright\u2026and since you want my company so bad, perhaps I can talk you into buying me a beer when you finish your business?\u201d<\/p>\n Adam laughed softly. \u201cI was sort of hoping you\u2019d buy me a beer.\u201d<\/p>\n As we walked out the door, Pa followed us, watching.<\/p>\n \u201cHow\u2019s about we flip a coin, heads you buy, tails I buy?\u201d I asked my brother.<\/p>\n \u201cSure.\u201d<\/p>\n I pulled a coin out of my pocket and flipped it into the air, letting it land in the dirt at our feet. Then I leaned down to look.<\/p>\n \u201cHeads,\u201d I grinned. Adam groaned softly as he mounted up. \u201cYou didn\u2019t use that two headed coin of yours, did you?\u201d<\/p>\n I quickly put on a stunned expression on my face and looked over at Adam.<\/p>\n \u201cYou cut me deeply,\u201d I told him.<\/p>\n \u201cYeah\u2026I see the pain in your eyes\u2026\u201d he said laughingly as he nudged Sport. \u201cOne\u2026that\u2019s all, I\u2019ll buy you one beer\u2026after that, it\u2019s your turn.\u201d<\/p>\n I giggled as I swung into the saddle, agreeing to the deal. \u201cYou get those papers signed for Pa, I\u2019m heading on down to see Herb and I\u2019ll meet you at the Silver Dollar.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cAlright, Adam, I won\u2019t be long\u2026don\u2019t you.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s too hot to dally, I\u2019ll be along, you just order me a beer\u2026and Joe\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYeah?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cStay out of trouble\u2026\u201d Adam laughed lightly. He knows me so well.<\/p>\n I gave big brother a cocky grin and then turned and went inside, Mr. Garrison, the banker, was expecting me. Adam moseyed on down the street. \u201cCARTWRIGHT!\u201d<\/p>\n I tried to ignore him. I wondered where Adam was as I moved slowly in the direction of the saloon. The kid on the street was growing frustrated because I kept moving away instead of stopping and facing him.<\/p>\n \u201cCOWARD!\u201d<\/p>\n I stopped. The fine hairs on the back of my neck bristled slightly. I stared straight ahead, knowing in my heart that the folks of Virginia City that knew me, knew I was no coward. But the word cut into me like a finely honed knife. I swallowed down the thickness that collected in my throat and walked on. A man, a stranger stepped from the crowd and blocked my path. His eyes were dark and daring as he silently challenged me. A second man joined him, completely blocking the boardwalk.<\/p>\n \u201cLOOK AT HIM\u2026HE\u2019S TOO YELLOW TO EVEN TURN AROUND AND FACE ME!\u201d<\/p>\n There was no way to go around them so I stepped down from the boardwalk into the street but the men in the group moved as if they were one and formed a semi-circle around me. I couldn\u2019t believe it; they were all wanting to see a gunfight. They could already taste my blood! But I wasn\u2019t going to be forced into it, after all, I\u2019d promised my pa I wouldn\u2019t let Stokes gourd me into one. But my way was totally blocked and I when I tried to push my way through, they pushed back.<\/p>\n \u201cYELLOW-BELLY!\u201d<\/p>\n I\u2019d had enough of the name-calling and slowly I turned around. By now I had moved far enough down the street that the sun was to my back. Funny that I noticed its warmth beating down on my shoulders. I wondered if today was the day that I was going to die. Lonnie Stokes sure looked as if he could kill me; the grave expression on his face told me that he was plenty ready to.<\/p>\n \u201cDraw, Cartwright\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I swallowed hard, knowing that the people would think it true that I was afraid of him, but I stood firm, folding my arms across my chest, well out of reach of my .45<\/p>\n \u201cNo.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWHAT!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI said no\u2026I\u2019m not going to shoot it out with you\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cCHICKEN!\u201d<\/p>\n The kid was losing his cool. He wasn\u2019t sure what to do.<\/p>\n \u201cNo\u2026it\u2019s just too hot. Why don\u2019t you let me buy you a beer?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI DON\u2019T WANT A DAMN BEER\u2026I WANT YOU TO DRAW!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cAlright\u2026alright, break it up\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I looked over to my right and saw the sheriff shoving his way through the crowd.<\/p>\n \u201cCARTWRIGHT!\u201d<\/p>\n My attention was suddenly drawn from the sheriff to the kid. He went for his gun and in self-defense I went for mine. I heard the blast from his pistol and instantly felt a burning pain pierce my upper right arm. My pistol was knocked from my hand as I was spun around. When I fell, it was to my knees but almost before I could catch my breath, hands were helping me to stand. My left hand covered the wound as blood seeped from between my fingers. I sucked in a chest full of air in an attempt to ward off the searing pain.<\/p>\n \u201cAre you alright?\u201d<\/p>\n I looked up then, into the dark worried eyes of my brother. I glanced down at my arm and then realizing it was only grazed, nodded my head.<\/p>\n \u201cYeah, I think so,\u201d I told Adam wondering how he had gotten to me so quickly.<\/p>\n By that time, Roy had the kid\u2019s gun and had his fingers wrapped tightly around Lonnie\u2019s arm, leading him toward us. The crowd parted to let them through. The sheriff stopped in front of Adam and I.<\/p>\n \u201cYou alright, Little Joe?\u201d the sheriff asked.<\/p>\n \u201cHe only grazed me.\u201d<\/p>\n Roy was angry about the whole thing, you could tell by the dark scowl he wore.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m gonna lock this fool kid up\u2026you come by my office after you get Doc Martin to tend to that arm, and I\u2019ll have the complaint filled out and ready for you to sign.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cComplaint?\u201d I asked.<\/p>\n \u201cYeah\u2026you are going to file a complaint, ain\u2019t ya?\u201d<\/p>\n I glanced at Adam, not sure if I should press charges or not. In the back of my mind I was thinking that if I did, it might make things worse. Lonnie would feel he had a reason to come gunning for me, if I did. But if I didn\u2019t\u2026<\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t know Roy\u2026I\u2019ll think on it\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n Roy didn\u2019t like that answer. He didn\u2019t put up with gun fighters coming into his town and trying to stir up trouble. I could tell he was plenty ready to get rid of this kid, even if it meant sending him off to prison for a spell for attempted murder.<\/p>\n \u201cYou think on it real hard like, Little Joe\u2026ya pa ain\u2019t gonna like this\u2026ya know as well as I do, he wants this here kid outta town. He\u2019ll expect ya to press charges\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cRoy\u2019s right, Joe. Roy, we\u2019ll come by the office after I get Joe\u2019s arm taken care of.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHave it you\u2019re way\u2026but I\u2019m lockin\u2019 this hoodlum up for now\u2026\u201d I was watching the doctor as he wiped away the dried blood and cleaned the wound. Adam was standing on the other side of me and when I looked up at him, I could see the worry etched into the fine lines of his handsome face.<\/p>\n \u201cYou still owe me a beer,\u201d I said to him. \u201cA deal\u2019s a deal\u2026ain\u2019t that what you\u2019re always telling me?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI think I should get you home\u2026forget the beer, Joe.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNo\u2026you promised to buy me a beer.\u201d<\/p>\n Adam frowned as he looked over at Doc Martin.<\/p>\n \u201cA beer won\u2019t hurt him, Adam.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWell\u2026alright, but just one, Joe. After that, we\u2019re stopping by the sheriff\u2019s office, you\u2019re gonna press charges and then we\u2019re going home. That should be enough excitement for you for one day,\u201d Adam said, but then he grinned at me. \u201cYou were lucky, kid\u2026that boy was fast\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYou saw him?\u201d I hadn\u2019t been aware that Adam had been anywhere about.<\/p>\n \u201cI was just coming out of the harness makers and saw the crowd. Somehow I knew you\u2019d been in the middle of it. I got there just as Stokes pulled his gun\u2026Joe\u2026he could have killed you. You barely got your gun out of your holster.\u201d<\/p>\n I scratched my head and glanced up at my brother. What he said was true\u2026that loud mouth kid was about as fast as any man I\u2019d ever seen.<\/p>\n \u201cFast yeah\u2026but he sure was a poor shot\u2026\u201d I said, hoping to relieve some of the tension I saw in Adam\u2019s face.<\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t think he intended to kill you\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWhat?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cJust what I said, I think he only aimed on winging you\u2026to\u2026make you mad enough to seek him out the next time\u2026but there\u2019s not going to be a next time\u2026\u201d Adam seemed adamant about that.<\/p>\n I hadn\u2019t thought of it that way, maybe Adam was right. Perhaps Lonnie had only intended to wing me, but just the same, if I pressed charges against him, wouldn\u2019t that give him more of a motive to seek me out? And if I didn\u2019t\u2026would he be tempted to finish what he started? Either way, it seemed to me that things were slowly moving toward a showdown, no matter what I did to avoid one. Lonnie was determined to have his way. Maybe I should try talking to him. With him behind bars, locked up in Roy\u2019s jail, he\u2019d almost have to listen to me. I could reason with him, try to explain that I wasn\u2019t afraid of him, but that I didn\u2019t see any point in one of us getting killed just for the sole purpose of proving who was the faster draw. I decided right then that\u2019s what I would do, talk to the kid\u2026then, if he wouldn\u2019t listen to reason, I\u2019d have no other recourse but to let the law handle it.<\/p>\n \u201cYou\u2019re right Adam, there\u2019s not going to be a next time, not if I can help it. Thanks, Doc\u2026just send the bill to Pa,\u201d I said with a cheeky grin. \u201cCome on Adam, let\u2019s go see Roy, I have an idea\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I walked out of the doc\u2019s office not knowing what to expect when I got to the sheriff\u2019s, but had my mind set on trying to reason with the boy. I wasn\u2019t prepared for what lay ahead\u2026none of us were. I found myself stunned by the coldness within the boy\u2019s heart. I turned away from the jail cell and walked back into the main office. Roy was sitting behind his desk; Adam sat in a chair facing the sheriff.<\/p>\n \u201cWell?\u201d Adam asked, looking up at me.<\/p>\n I knew I was frowning, I couldn\u2019t help it, Lonnie Stokes refused to listen to reason.<\/p>\n \u201cHe claims that no matter what I do, he\u2019s gonna find a way to make me face him,\u201d I explained to my brother and the sheriff.<\/p>\n \u201cYa best press charges, Little Joe\u2026at least that way he\u2019ll be gone for a while\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cLot of good it would do,\u201d I told him as I stood gazing out the window. I turned back around to find both Adam and Roy watching me intently. \u201cHe\u2019d only grow bitter with time and be more determined to get me\u2026and if I don\u2019t press charges, he\u2019ll just be waiting for me somewhere\u2026either here in town or out on the road someplace. There\u2019s no way around it\u2026I have to face him\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNo you don\u2019t!\u201d Adam blared at me as he shoved back his chair and walked over to me. \u201cYou can stay out of town for a spell, he\u2019ll grow tired of waiting for you\u2026he\u2019ll not dare come out to the ranch\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cIf\u2019n he does, I\u2019ll have him locked up for trespassing\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cOh come on\u2026I can\u2019t hide, Adam and you know it\u2026I won\u2019t live like that\u2026everyone will think I am afraid of him that\u2019s for sure\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cDoesn\u2019t matter what others think, Joe\u2026the kid\u2019s fast\u2026you saw that yourself\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHe\u2019s faster than anybody I ever saw before,\u201d Roy added. \u201cIt might be wisest to press charges, Little Joe\u2026that way we\u2019ll all be well rid of\u2019em.\u201d<\/p>\n I paced around the room like a caged animal. I wasn\u2019t sure what to do.<\/p>\n \u201cAdam\u2026he\u2019s just a boy\u2026he\u2019s barely seventeen\u2026I can\u2019t send him to prison. You know what they do to young boys there.\u201d<\/p>\n I paced across the room and stopped at the door that led into the cellblock. The kid was lying on the narrow cot; one arm was across his face, shielding his eyes from the bright sunlight that shone through the window. I wasn\u2019t sure if he was sleeping or just covering his eyes pretending to be.<\/p>\n \u201cLonnie?\u201d<\/p>\n Slowly the boy moved his arm away from his face and raised his head to look up at me.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat do you want?\u201d he growled.<\/p>\n \u201cI want this settled,\u201d I said to him.<\/p>\n Lonnie got up, stretched and walked over to me, placing his hands on the bars that separated us.<\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t want to send you to prison\u2026that\u2019s where you\u2019re headed if I press charges,\u201d I explained.<\/p>\n \u201cSo?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t want to fight you either\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cCoward!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNo\u2026I\u2019m not afraid of you\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cThen why won\u2019t you fight me?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cMaybe I don\u2019t want to die\u2026or perhaps I don\u2019t want to see you die\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m not scared to die\u2026besides, I\u2019m faster than you are,\u201d Lonnie said, obviously very confident in himself.<\/p>\n \u201cYou might be surprised,\u201d I said, hoping to ignite a spark of fear in him, but after a moment I saw it was no use, Lonnie was telling the truth, he really wasn\u2019t afraid of dying.<\/p>\n \u201cI won\u2019t be\u2026you forget Cartwright, I saw you\u2026I watched that little draw and shoot match you took part in a few days ago. Sure, you\u2019re good\u2026but I\u2019m better\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I was at a loss as to what to say to the kid. I\u2019d never see someone so young be so fired up about having a shoot out with a man he barely knew. I stood there a minute longer, until Lonnie turned his back on me and walked to the far side of his cell.<\/p>\n \u201cOnly way to be rid of me Little Joe, is to fight me. You can go ahead and press charges if you\u2019ve a mind to\u2026but rest assured, I\u2019ll be back\u2026someday\u2026and we\u2019ll pick up right here\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I was fighting my temper. I really wanted in that cell with him so I could beat some sense into his thick head.<\/p>\n \u201cWhy are you so set on killing me?\u201d I demanded.<\/p>\n \u201cBecause I can\u2026and I will,\u201d he snarled. \u201cThat little incident outside the saloon should have given you a hint as to how fast I really am\u2026you barely got your gun outta your holster\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I gritted my teeth and turned to leave, but his next words stopped me cold in my tracks.<\/p>\n \u201cYou\u2019ll fight me, Cartwright\u2026I promise you that\u2026someday\u2026you\u2019ll hate me so much, you\u2019ll come gunnin\u2019 for me\u2026and I\u2019ll be waitin\u2019 for you\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I felt the fine hairs on the back of my neck rise and I shivered involuntarily. I didn\u2019t know exactly what he meant, but something in the tone of his voice warned me that unless I met him in the street, I\u2019d never be rid of him. I glanced back over my shoulder just in time to see him lay back down on the cot.<\/p>\n \u201cTell your family to watch their backs\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n My blood ran cold in my veins\u2026he was threatening to gun down one of my family members. Anger washed over me as I stomped back to the cell, grabbing the bars. Hate spewed from my mouth as I yelled out at the sheriff.<\/p>\n \u201cLET HIM OUT, ROY\u2026I\u2019LL MEET HIM IN THE STREET!\u201d<\/p>\n Both Roy and Adam came running into the cellblock to see what all the racket was about. Lonnie had gotten to his feet and stood facing me, grinning wickedly.<\/p>\n \u201cLet him out!\u201d I demanded of the sheriff.<\/p>\n Adam and Roy looked stunned and I knew they thought I\u2019d lost my mind. Adam placed his hand on my shoulder and gentle squeezed.<\/p>\n \u201cDon\u2019t be silly\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I turned and glared back at him, knocking his hand from my shoulder. \u201cHe\u2019s threatened the family, Adam\u2026if I don\u2019t shoot it out with him, he\u2019s going to kill one of you\u2026I can\u2019t let that happen\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cAw\u2026Little Joe\u2026he\u2019s just babblin\u2019,\u201d Roy said trying to calm me. \u201cI ain\u2019t got no choice, either you press charges or I turn him loose and run him outta town\u2026but there AIN\u2019T gonna be no more gunplay!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cPress charges, Joe\u2026\u201d Adam hammered at me. \u201cYou\u2019ll regret this day if you don\u2019t\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNo\u2026I\u2019m not sending a boy to prison for thinking he\u2019s a fast gun\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n Adam stood up, glaring at me. I could see the uneasiness mixed with his anger but I stood firm to my decision.<\/p>\n \u201cI have a feeling you\u2019re gonna be mighty sorry, Little Brother,\u201d Adam breathed to me in a low tone.<\/p>\n I turned and walked away. I\u2019d had enough of Lonnie Stokes, I was tired, my arm hurt and all I wanted to do was go home; the free beer was long forgotten by this time.<\/p>\n \u201cRun him out of town Roy\u2026you comin\u2019 Adam, I\u2019m going home?\u201d I can\u2019t say how relieved I felt. I saw the same look on the faces of my family too. I hadn\u2019t been aware of how concerned they had been until that moment.<\/p>\n \u201cHey\u2026what\u2019ll you say we all go into town tonight?\u201d I asked them.<\/p>\n They swapped knowing grins and then Hoss asked a question I knew one of them was going to ask.<\/p>\n \u201cYou buyin\u2019?\u201d<\/p>\n I giggled, I felt good\u2026better than I had in a month.<\/p>\n \u201cSure, why not\u2026today\u2019s pay day\u2026you are goin\u2019 to pay us\u2026aren\u2019t you Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n Even Pa laughed. \u201cWell, son, if today\u2019s pay day\u2026I reckon I have no choice\u2026come on inside and let\u2019s settle up, then we can clean up and go into town after supper! Roy, you want to stay for supper?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cThanks, Ben for the invite, but guess I\u2019d best get back to town, I\u2019m still workin\u2019 ya know\u2026\u201d \u201cSure \u2018nough\u2026you hurry it up now Shortshanks\u2026\u2019member, you\u2019re buyin\u2019,\u201d snickered Hoss.<\/p>\n \u201cDon\u2019t you worry none\u2026I won\u2019t let him forget,\u201d teased Adam as he looked in my direction.<\/p>\n It sure felt good, seeing my family in such merry moods again. The dark cloud of uncertainty had passed and it was just plain ole nice to have things back to normal. Little did I know that within minutes, our lives would be changed again\u2026this time things wouldn\u2019t look so great.<\/p>\n Adam and I led the four horses into the livery and put them in stalls. After we unsaddled and tossed them some grain, Adam left a note for the liveryman explaining that we\u2019d be back in a couple of hours and would settle up with him then. As we turned to go, a strange, muffled sound caught our attention. We glanced at each other and I saw Adam quickly move his hand down to his side, resting his fingers on the butt of his pistol. He motioned for me to be quiet and pointed to the darkest corner of the barn. We crept along slowly, listening as the odd noise grew in volume. We drew our guns, not knowing what to expect.<\/p>\n When we saw Cletus, the stable boy, propped in a corner, his hands tied behind his back and his ankles knotted with thick ropes, Adam and I both gasped. Quickly, we holstered our guns and I started to remove the gag from around the man\u2019s head while Adam struggled to undo the knots in the ropes about Cletus\u2019 feet.<\/p>\n I leaned the elderly man forward a bit and loosened the ropes around his wrists<\/p>\n \u201cWho did this?\u201d I asked him.<\/p>\n \u201cIt was\u2026\u201d his words were cut short. He pointed over the top of Adam\u2019s shoulder and we both turned to look. Behind Adam stood Lonnie Stokes, his pistol drawn and pointed at us.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019ve been keepin\u2019 tabs on both you,\u201d he snarled at us. \u201cI\u2019ve been waitin\u2019 for you to come to town,\u201d he said as he slowly slipped his gun loosely into his holster and backed up a couple of paces. He spread his arms slightly, taking the stance used when a man is about to make his move.<\/p>\n Adam started to stand up, but Lonnie yelled at him not to move a muscle; Adam stayed in the crouching position, his back to Lonnie. He glanced over at me and shook his head; I was still squatting down next to Cletus. The position I was in put Adam slightly off to one side from Lonnie and I, but I realized that if Lonnie was expecting me to go for my gun, he was the one with the advantage. What with being so low to the ground, I was in his direct firing line.<\/p>\n \u201cStand up Little Joe,\u201d Lonnie dared.<\/p>\n \u201cDon\u2019t move, Joe,\u201d Adam warned. He looked me square in the eye. I knew the look was a warning so I stayed put.<\/p>\n \u201cI said get up\u2026I want this fair and square\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cThere\u2019s nothing fair about this\u2026I haven\u2019t called you out,\u201d I snapped in anger.<\/p>\n Before I could blink, Lonnie had gone for his gun and fired. Out of the corner of my eye, I had seen Adam move and then stop as if frozen in time. For a brief moment I thought he was looking at me, I thought I\u2019d been shot, but I didn\u2019t feel anything\u2026there was no blood. Then I looked over at my brother, I saw the strangest look on his face and then he slumped forward, into Cletus\u2019 lap. His pistol lay in the dirt at Cletus\u2019 feet. Lonnie had shot Adam in the back and blood ran red, staining my brother\u2019s freshly laundered black shirt.<\/p>\n I jumped to my feet in order to help my brother, but Lonnie warned against it.<\/p>\n \u201cLeave him be\u2026\u201d he commanded. \u201cStupid fool for thinking he could out draw me! Now it\u2019s your turn Cartwright\u2026you should hate me enough\u2026now\u2026just as I said you would.\u201d<\/p>\n I froze, keeping my eyes on his face. In one swift move, he twirled his weapon and slid it back into his holster. I straightened up, flexing my fingers, watching his every move and not daring to look away, not even did I chance a glance at my brother who lay at my feet. The time had come; I had to draw against him now\u2026I had no other choice, it was draw or die\u2026maybe both, but at least I\u2019d get one chance at killing the murdering son-of-a-bitch!<\/p>\n Out front we heard voices. The sound of men approaching put an end to the gunplay. It seemed as if I blinked and Lonnie was gone, vanishing that quickly. I started out the back door after him, but the piteous moaning that came from my brother, stopped me dead in my tracks. I spun around and dropped to the ground, gathering Adam into my arms.<\/p>\n \u201cJoe?\u201d Adam murmured in a whisper.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m here, Adam,\u201d I cried.<\/p>\n His face was a pasty white. I could feel the warmth of his blood soaking into my own shirtsleeve as I held him close to me. He opened his eyes; they were glazed and I could see the pain etched into his forehead. He tried to speak again but nothing came out of his mouth. By that time, Pa and Hoss were there with me on the ground. I remember looking up at Pa and seeing the horror in his expression, stunned to see his firstborn held in his youngest son\u2019s arms, dying.<\/p>\n \u201cDear God,\u201d Pa muttered. \u201cWhat on earth happened? Someone help us!\u201d he issued to anyone in the crowd that had begun to gather. \u201cHoss,\u201d he yelled, taking charge.<\/p>\n \u201cYessir,\u201d I barely heard my brother say.<\/p>\n \u201cYou men\u2026help Hoss get this man to the doctor\u2019s office\u2026\u201d he said to those who had stepped forward to help.<\/p>\n I don\u2019t remember Hoss and the others taking Adam from my arms, nor do I remember my father\u2019s hands on my upper arms, gently pulling me to my feet. I was in shock, I was speechless and I was scared.<\/p>\n \u201cJoseph\u2026son\u2026are you alright?\u201d Pa, seeing all the bright blood, was concerned that I had been wounded as well.<\/p>\n I raised my head slowly and I think I must have looked my father in the eyes, I\u2019m not sure, but something inside of me broke then and I practically collapsed. Pa caught me and gathered me up in his own arms and carried me outside into the cool air. I buried my face against the soft leather of his vest, determined not to let the spectators see me cry.<\/p>\n It was just a short distance down the street to Doc Martin\u2019s office and we were there almost instantly. Adam had already been carried inside and sure I was, Doc Martin was already tending to his patient.<\/p>\n \u201cPut me down,\u201d I whispered to my father. \u201cI\u2019m alright\u2026I can walk.\u201d<\/p>\n Pa set me on my feet but he kept his strong hands on my arms. My head was lowered but I remember Pa lifting my chin with his finger like he used to do when I was a little boy.<\/p>\n \u201cEverything\u2019s going to be alright, Joe\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n How many times over the years have I heard my father say that to me? I couldn\u2019t count them, but things always turned out right, just as Pa had always predicted they would. But this time I wasn\u2019t so sure.<\/p>\n \u201cHe\u2019s hurt bad\u2026that bastard shot him in the back\u2026Adam never had a chance\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWho Joseph\u2026who shot your brother?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cLonnie\u2026Lonnie Stokes,\u201d I proclaimed, straightening to my full height.<\/p>\n I walked around Pa then and went inside. I had to know about Adam, about how badly he was hurt and if the doctor thought he would live or die\u2026cause if he died\u2026. I was sick with guilt and with grief. My shirt was soaked with my brother\u2019s blood and when I glanced down at my hands, I was stunned to see that Adam\u2019s blood had dried there as well. Strange, how that made me feel, knowing that I actually had my brother\u2019s blood on my hands. I tried not to think about it, but it gnawed at my gut. All I remember after that was folding my fingers into tight balls and backing up against the wall.<\/p>\n Pa had been watching me, and he must have seen that I was about to break down. He rushed over to me and put his arm around my shoulder, pulling me close to him in a kind of hug, tightly. I barely recall looking up at him; I couldn\u2019t see him very well because of the tears that blinded my eyes.<\/p>\n \u201cThis\u2026is\u2026all\u2026my\u2026fault\u2026\u201d I babbled as I turned my head into his shoulder and buried my face against him.<\/p>\n I started to sob uncontrollably. It had been such a strain on me, the last month, never knowing where Lonnie Stokes was or when he might show up unannounced, like tonight. I couldn\u2019t stop myself. Pa\u2019s arms tightened about me and I felt another hand on my shoulder squeezing tenderly. I knew without looking or asking that it was Hoss.<\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s\u2026my\u2026fault\u2026\u201d I uttered again.<\/p>\n \u201cShh\u2026that\u2019s not so, Joseph\u2026you had no way of knowing that the Stokes kid would be hiding in that barn\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cPa\u2019s right, Punkin\u2026no one\u2019s blamin\u2019 you for this\u2026and Adam won\u2019t either\u2026\u201d Hoss said trying to comfort me.<\/p>\n \u201cJoe\u2026come over here and sit down\u2026Paul will be out soon and then we\u2019ll know something\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n Pa led me over to the small sofa and sat down with me; he even handed me his handkerchief. I looked up at him, seeing his anxiety and fear and I felt that much more guilty for what happened. I wiped my eyes just as the door to the back room opened and Doc Martin came over to us. When Pa stood up, I did the same; Hoss was already standing beside the physician. We were all anxious to hear how Adam was. \u201cCan\u2026I see him?\u201d I asked the doctor.<\/p>\n \u201cHe\u2019s resting, Joe\u2026he won\u2019t even know you\u2019re there,\u201d Paul explained. \u201cBest leave him be for now\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNo\u2026ere\u2026I mean\u2026please? I won\u2019t bother him, I promise\u2026I\u2019d\u2026just like to sit with him\u2026just for a little while?\u201d I knew it sounded as if I were begging\u2026but if that\u2019s what it would take to get in to see my brother, then, I\u2019d drop to my knees and beg if I had too.<\/p>\n I saw the doctor and my father exchange quick glances. I knew Pa would understand how I felt\u2026and why, so I fixed my eyes on him. He smiled knowingly at me and then turned to Doc Martin.<\/p>\n \u201cIf he promises not to disturb Adam\u2026couldn\u2019t he sit with him for a few minutes?\u201d<\/p>\n I noticed that the doctor was watching me, and since he\u2019s known me all my life, I suppose he had some understanding of my needs, so he nodded his head in agreement, relenting.<\/p>\n \u201cNo more than an hour, Little Joe\u2026then I want you to get some rest, you look beat.\u201d<\/p>\n I agreed and quickly, before he changed his mind, I slipped quietly into the back room where Adam was. It was dimly lit with the curtains drawn closed and I had to be careful not to trip over something as I silently made my way to the bed.<\/p>\n Adam was lying on his side. I could see the white bandages that the doctor had wrapped around his middle after removing the slug from his back. The whiteness of the cloth was dimmed by the slight redness of my brother\u2019s blood. I felt my throat thicken like I was choking. Weakness made my stomach queasy and I was overcome with emotion as I sat down next to the bed where I could watch the expressions flickering across my brother\u2019s brow. Forced to lean forward, I covered my face with my hands. Sobs from deep within me, begged to be released, but soon drowned in the hate that sprung forth from deeper inside my soul. Hate like I\u2019ve never known before, born of guilt and remorse and a startling sense of having failed my own brother, of having to watch him suffer because of my doing\u2026or in this case, my not doing. He\u2019d been right all along, I should have listened to him and pressed charges against the murdering scoundrel but now because of my own bull-headedness, my oldest brother might die. I\u2019d have to live with that\u2026there would be no satisfaction left for me for the remainder of my days\u2026except one. And that would be to hunt down Lonnie Stokes and kill him. Sure, it wouldn\u2019t bring my brother back if he died, nothing would\u2026but the gratification I\u2019d get from killing the little bastard would ease the burden of my own guilt. Or so I thought. I had stayed with Adam all night. Sometime during the wee hours of the morning, I\u2019d fallen to sleep in the chair I\u2019d been sitting in and when I woke finally, I was surprised to see that someone had covered me with a blanket; my guess would be Pa most likely, or maybe Mrs. Martin, the doctor\u2019s wife.<\/p>\n When I went into the waiting room, I was surprised to see my father, Hoss and the sheriff taking together. They all turned and looked at me and each man wore a different expression on their face. Pa walked over to me and put his hand on my arm. His eyes were dark and his bushy brows drawn together. I knew something was wrong.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat\u2019s wrong, Pa?\u201d I asked him.<\/p>\n \u201cNothing\u2026not really,\u201d he began. \u201cRoy just stopped by to tell us that\u2026they caught Stokes\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWHAT!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHe\u2019s over in my jail right now,\u201d Roy explained.<\/p>\n I pulled free of Pa\u2019s grasp and grabbed my hat off the sofa and headed for the door.<\/p>\n \u201cJoseph!\u201d<\/p>\n I stopped and turned around, his voice was deep and commanding and I knew better than to walk out of that room without responding, but I wasn\u2019t happy about it\u2026I wanted to see for myself that Stokes was behind bars.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat!\u201d<\/p>\n Pa glared at me, the previous expression of understanding disappeared. I had riled him.<\/p>\n \u201cDon\u2019t take that tone with me, young man!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m sorry, Pa\u2026I didn\u2019t mean to snap at you,\u201d I said, apologizing.<\/p>\n The anger instantly dissipated from Pa\u2019s face.<\/p>\n \u201cWhere are you going?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cOver to the jail\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWhy?\u201d<\/p>\n I sighed\u2026Pa was playing the question game with me again and I was beginning to lose my temper. I took a deep breath.<\/p>\n \u201cI want to see for myself that Lonnie Stokes is behind bars\u2026is that alright?\u201d<\/p>\n Roy stepped forward then and gave me a hard stare.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat\u2019s wrong son, don\u2019t you believe me?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYes sir Sheriff, I believe you\u2026I just want to get a good look at his face\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n It was Pa\u2019s turn again; for some reason both he and Roy didn\u2019t like the idea of me going to see the back-shooting son of a\u2026 Well, I was going anyway.<\/p>\n \u201cJoseph, there is no reason for you to look at his face. He\u2019s in jail, locked away like he should be and there he\u2019ll stay until there\u2019s a trial.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYour Pa\u2019s right Little Joe\u2026best you stay here with your brother and keep away from my jail\u2026I\u2019ll handle that kid\u2026AND\u2026I don\u2019t need your help\u2026\u201d Roy issued.<\/p>\n \u201cBut\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNo buts!\u201d Roy said sternly, turning to my father. \u201cBen\u2026I\u2019m trusting you to keep your boy here away from my prisoner. I know what he\u2019d like to do to Stokes\u2026can\u2019t say I blame him none\u2026but the law will handle this\u2026understand, Little Joe?\u201d Roy turned to ask me.<\/p>\n I wasn\u2019t happy about the demand. I really wanted to get my hands on that varmint\u2026but I conceded for now because just then the doctor came out of the back room and said that Adam was stirring about and I wanted to talk to him. I needed to tell my brother how sorry I was\u2026how badly I felt that because of me, he was wounded, shot\u2026<\/p>\n \u201cPa?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m here son,\u201d Pa said in a low voice.<\/p>\n We were all gathered around the bed where Adam was just beginning to wake up.<\/p>\n \u201cCan I talk to him?\u201d I asked anxiously.<\/p>\n \u201cJust a minute, son,\u201d Pa told me. \u201cAdam\u2026how do you feel?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cJoe?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m here, Adam,\u201d I said, moving closer to my brother. \u201cYou don\u2019t have to worry, Adam\u2026Stokes is locked up\u2026I\u2019m still goin\u2019 to make him pay for what he\u2019s done!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cJoseph! That will be enough of that kind of talk!\u201d Pa reprimanded me.<\/p>\n My lips were pinched tightly as I turned to glare at my father. His own eyes were exceedingly dark and I knew I\u2019d pushed too hard. I looked away, unable to meet the intensity in his eyes.<\/p>\n \u201cDon\u2019t\u2026Joe\u2026let it go\u2026\u201d Adam muttered as he tried to focus on me.<\/p>\n \u201cYou needn\u2019t worry, son,\u201d Pa responded, \u201cJoe\u2019s not going to do a thing\u2026are you Joseph!\u201d Pa said, looking up at me.<\/p>\n He expected an answer, but I wasn\u2019t ready to give him one. Adam wasn\u2019t out of danger yet, he might still die\u2026and if and when he did, Lonnie Stokes was going to die as well. But I couldn\u2019t say that to my father or Adam, so instead, I said nothing. Turning, I just walked out of the room, I needed air, I needed to get away for a bit, and so I left.<\/p>\n Once outside, I sucked in a chest full of air. It seemed to help clear my head a bit. My stomach growled reminding me that it had been hours since I\u2019d eaten so I decided to walk down to Daisy\u2019s Kitchen and have a bite of breakfast. As I was going inside, a small boy about eleven or so, came running out and nearly collided with me. I laughed lightly, surprising myself at how easy it came, considering all that had happened in the last few hours, but the boy laughed too.<\/p>\n \u201cExcuse me sir,\u201d he said, apologizing for being in such a rush.<\/p>\n \u201cThat\u2019s alright, kid\u2026say, what\u2019s the hurry?\u201d I asked, seeing that he carried a tray covered with a clean red cloth. \u201cSomething sure smells good\u2026what\u2019cha got there?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s breakfast\u2026for the Sheriff\u2019s prisoner\u2026Mr. Coffee asked me to fetch it over to the jail for\u2019em. He gave me a nickel!\u201d the boy announced happily.<\/p>\n Without warning, anger surged through my veins, making me shiver. I barred the kid\u2019s path as I dug into my pocket, pulling a nickel out.<\/p>\n \u201cHere,\u201d I said, offering the boy the money. \u201cI\u2019ll give you another nickel if you let me take this tray to the jail\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I knew it was wrong, I knew deep inside of me that Pa would be furious at me for going back on my word\u2026but I couldn\u2019t help myself. I felt driven, I felt\u2026well, I mean\u2026why should that back shooter be able to enjoy a nice hot breakfast when my brother lay dying, fighting for his life. The only picture that I saw in my head was our breakfast table where an empty chair sat that had once been my brother\u2019s sitting place at the table.<\/p>\n \u201cHow about a dime\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWhy you little\u2026\u201d I almost laughed again, but I dug out a dime and swapped it for the breakfast tray.<\/p>\n The boy tested it with his teeth and grinned up at me. \u201cThanks, Mister,\u201d he said and then ran off down the street and out of sight.<\/p>\n I lifted the cloth to see what Daisy had put on the tray. The tray contained a short stack of pancakes, a plate of bacon with a container of syrup and another of soft butter sat beside a small pot that contained steaming coffee. The lucky bastard, I thought! I snatched a piece of bacon and stuffed it into my mouth. It was good\u2026too bad Adam couldn\u2019t enjoy a piece.<\/p>\n I pushed the door to the office opened and slipped inside. No one was there; I felt a growing anxiety beginning to gnaw at my middle.<\/p>\n \u201cHEY\u2026IS THAT YOU SHERIFF? HURRY UP WITH THAT FOOD\u2026I\u2019M ABOUT TO STARVE!\u201d Lonnie Stokes shouted from behind the closed door that separated the cells from the main office.<\/p>\n I jerked back on the door, flinging it wide. The kid was standing at the cell door, hands gripping the thick iron bars. To me, it was a glorious sight.<\/p>\n \u201cWell, well,\u201d he chirped, confident in himself. \u201cIf it ain\u2019t Joe Cartwright. I\u2019m surprised to see you doing the sheriff\u2019s chores,\u201d he said with a smirk.<\/p>\n I sat the tray down on the little table and turned without saying a word and reached for the keys.<\/p>\n \u201cHurry up\u2026I\u2019m starving to death!\u201d he demanded of me.<\/p>\n I stopped cold and glared at him. I hated the little punk. Instead of opening the cell, I pulled up a chair to the little table and sat down. Hate\u2019s a hard knot to swallow you know.<\/p>\n The keys I placed next to the tray that I quickly uncovered. The aroma of food filled the little room. When I glanced over at the prisoner, I saw him lick his lips. Satisfaction was slowly dulling the pain of hate. I pour a cup of the coffee, watching Lonnie from the corner of my eye. I wondered briefly how long it had been since the kid had eaten. I really didn\u2019t care\u2026I didn\u2019t care if he starved.<\/p>\n I held the cup out to him and watched as he stretched out his arm through the bars trying to reach it. I smiled at him.<\/p>\n \u201cSmells good, heh?\u201d I said as I slowly and deliberately raised the cup to my own lips and took a sip. I heard the kid groan. \u201cSure tastes good too,\u201d I said, taunting the now angering back shooter.<\/p>\n I spread the soft butter on the pancakes and then drowned them in the hot maple syrup. As the syrup ran over the stack of pancakes, I took another piece of the thick, crisp bacon and stuffed it into my mouth.<\/p>\n \u201cHmmm\u2026good,\u201d I said, grinning at him. \u201cWant some?\u201d I asked, holding a piece out to him.<\/p>\n \u201cBastard\u2026\u201d Lonnie uttered, causing me to grin back at him. I shrugged my shoulders and dug into the pancakes.<\/p>\n He was furious. I could see the hate in his own deep-set eyes, as he turned away, unable to watch me devouring his breakfast. It only took about five minutes for me to eat everything. I stood up, wiping my mouth on the cloth and then tossed it onto the tray.<\/p>\n \u201cThanks,\u201d I said as I picked up the keys. \u201cYou would have enjoyed that, Daisy\u2019s a fine cook!\u201d<\/p>\n I walked out, leaving the tray where it was and closed the door. The keys I hung back on the peg and then, arranging my hat just so, I left, laughing loud enough that the murdering bastard could hear me. I felt elated, to a point.<\/p>\n It wasn\u2019t until later, after Roy returned to the office and found out what I had done and confronted my father with it, that I began to feel a little guilty about my actions.<\/p>\n \u201cI can\u2019t believe you\u2019d do something so\u2026so\u2026childish!\u201d my father stormed.<\/p>\n We stood in the main office down at the jail. The door between there and the cellblock was shut, but Pa and Roy were shouting so loudly at me, I was positive that Lonnie could hear every word. And to make matters worse, I was just as sure that he was gloating\u2026glad to see that I had been found out and was being fiercely reprimanded.<\/p>\n \u201cHow dare you come into my office and interfere with my job!\u201d shouted Roy. \u201cWhy\u2026I should lock you up\u2026put you in the cell right next to that boy!\u201d<\/p>\n I swallowed the thickness down that had suddenly sprung up in my throat. That would be the worst possible punishment\u2026to have to be confined so closely with that\u2026that\u2026kid.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat do you think, Ben?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI think that\u2019s a good idea\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I was stunned. I know my eyes widened and I knew Pa knew what I was thinking. I felt a sudden rush of panic seize me, chewing away at my insides.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m sorry\u2026\u201d muttered, lowering my head in shame.<\/p>\n \u201cWell\u2026you should be!\u201d stormed Roy.<\/p>\n I raised my head slightly, anger beginning to brew again from within.<\/p>\n \u201cI said as much\u2026what more do you want of me?\u201d I threw back at him. I was consumed and couldn\u2019t stop the flood of emotion that had quickly overtaken me.<\/p>\n \u201cHe tried to kill my brother\u2026he shot Adam in the back\u2026and my brother might well die\u2026and all the while that little punk sits back there gloating\u2026why should he enjoy a good home cooked meal when Adam can barely sip water from a spoon! I hope they hang the bastard\u2026I wanna see him die\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n I turned in a huff and fled. The sound of my father\u2019s deep voice loomed loudly in my ears.<\/p>\n \u201cJOSEPH, GET BACK HERE!\u201d<\/p>\n I never stopped, I didn\u2019t look back\u2026I had to get away\u2026I ran toward Adam. I needed to see my brother, I needed to be near him\u2026I longed for, I craved his strength\u2026he can\u2019t die, he just can\u2019t my heart cried over and over until I thought I\u2019d scream aloud! \u201cWhat on earth happened to you?\u201d I questioned, hurrying to my father\u2019s side, for he seemed about to collapse. That\u2019s when I got a good look at his battered face.<\/p>\n \u201cPa\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHelp me sit down\u2026\u201d he mumbled, his words all garbled because of his swollen lips.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat happened?\u201d I asked as I wet a cloth and helped him to wipe the blood from his lip.<\/p>\n \u201cStokes\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cSTOKES?\u201d I nearly shouted and then lowered my voice so as not to disturb Adam.<\/p>\n I saw the troubled look Pa cast my way while cleaning his face. It was mixture of uncertainty, worry and fear. I felt my heart pumping hard as I pushed for an explanation.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat about Stokes?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cJoseph\u2026calm down\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI AM calm\u2026what about him, Pa\u2026what happened to your face\u2026and how is that back shooting scum involved?\u201d<\/p>\n Pa sighed heavily. \u201cAfter you left\u2026Roy brought another breakfast tray for Lonnie. I wasn\u2019t there, but came in just as\u2026the boy was running out\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cRunning out\u2026what do you mean by that?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cApparently he\u2026got the drop on Roy\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWHAT!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cThat\u2019s what I said\u2026Lonnie got the drop on Roy, knocked him out and was just escaping out the front door as\u2026I was coming in. He hit me with something\u2026I\u2019m not sure what,\u201d Pa explained, running his jaw.<\/p>\n I stood up, all the old anger had returned and sent my emotions reeling. I turned to go.<\/p>\n \u201cJoseph\u2026where do you think you\u2019re going?\u201d Pa growled, standing and grabbing me by my upper arm.<\/p>\n I wrenched free, there\u2019d be no stopping me this time. \u201cI\u2019m going after Stokes\u2026\u201d I answered and turned again to go. This time, Pa stepped in front of me, baring my exit.<\/p>\n \u201cRoy is taking care of that. He\u2019s already sent a posse out to look for the boy.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cGood, the more the merrier\u2026now, if you\u2019ll excuse me\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNo!\u201d Pa demanded. \u201cYou\u2019re staying right here\u2026I won\u2019t allow you to go off looking for anyone with that much anger burning a hole in your heart\u2026Joe,\u201d he said, calming a bit. \u201cI don\u2019t want you to do something you\u2019ll be sorry for later.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI won\u2019t Pa\u2026you should know better than that\u2026but I just don\u2019t want to see that man get away with what he\u2019s done to Adam\u2026I want to see him pay for shooting my brother in the back\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHe will, son\u2026he will. But you need to let the law handle this\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cThe law! The law\u2026Pa\u2026sometimes the law messes up\u2026like today, Roy letting that scoundrel get the drop on him\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cJoseph, must I remind you that would not have happened if you had stayed away from there like you were told to do! But no\u2026you had to do what YOU wanted to do and taunt the boy, making Roy\u2019s job that much harder! If you\u2019d only listen to me once in a while\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I was furious. \u201cYou\u2019re blaming me?\u201d<\/p>\n Pa lowered his head; it must have been hurting something terrible and my bickering with him wasn\u2019t making him feel any better.<\/p>\n \u201cNo\u2026not entirely\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m sorry, Pa\u2026I guess I was wrong in doing what I\u2019d done. But\u2026you have no idea how he made me feel\u2026watching him waving that gun of his in our faces\u2026pushing for me to draw on him and then having to stand by and watch my own brother shot down\u2026in the back no less, by some snot-nosed kid whose only ambition in life is to prove to the world how fast he is\u2026so he missed his breakfast\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n Pa walked over to me and put both of his hands on my shoulders. \u201cI don\u2019t know exactly how you felt, but I know how I feel right at this moment. I have one son fighting for his life and one son who\u2019d willingly go out and kill or be killed just for the sake of seeking revenge. I can\u2019t let that happen\u2026if I stood back and let you do what you want to do, I stand a darn good chance of losing two sons instead of one\u2026I can\u2019t risk that\u2026it\u2019s too much to ask of me.\u201d<\/p>\n It was my turn to lower my head. I could barely look my father in the eyes. How could I be so stupid? Adam might well die, true\u2026but we\u2019d get through it, Pa, Hoss and myself, somehow, some way\u2026 I felt ashamed\u2026<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m sorry, Pa\u2026I\u2019ll wait until we hear from Roy\u2026I\u2019m sure he\u2019ll find Stokes\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cThank you, son\u2026thank you!\u201d \u201cHoss\u2026any luck?\u201d<\/p>\n Hoss spun around, seeing me, he shook his head. \u201cHow\u2019s Adam?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cResting\u2026what about Stokes, Hoss\u2026what happened, couldn\u2019t you pick up his trail\u2026what?\u201d I was growing impatient again.<\/p>\n \u201cYeah, we found it alright, over around Half Butte. Roy thought we had\u2019em cornered, but the little weasel found a back way out and gave us the slip\u2026ya sure Adam\u2019s alright?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYes, I\u2019m sure\u2026how on earth could Roy lose him that way\u2026again!\u201d I grumbled.<\/p>\n \u201cAw shucks, Little Joe\u2026t\u2019weren\u2019t Roy\u2019s fault. That kid\u2019s smart\u2026that\u2019s all\u2026say, where ya going?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNone of your business.\u201d<\/p>\n I knew perfectly well where I was going, but I didn\u2019t dare tell Hoss. It was for sure he\u2019d let it slip to Roy, or worse, to Pa and then all hell would break loose. But if Lonnie Stokes had found a back way off Half Butte, I was certain I could too, after all, I had been born and raised in this country and knew just about every rock and tree around\u2026or so the song goes.<\/p>\n Hurrying, I went to the livery and saddled my horse. It was lucky that I just happened to strap on my side arm earlier this morning so I wouldn\u2019t have to worry about going back to Doc Martin\u2019s and getting it. This way I\u2019d avoid a lot of questions and another argument with Pa. I wasn\u2019t going to break my promise to my father\u2026not really cause I didn\u2019t have any intentions of killing Lonnie Stokes, only to find him and bring him back with me to stand trial for attempting to kill my brother. Pa wouldn\u2019t be happy about my leaving and not saying anything to anyone, but I couldn\u2019t worry about that now. I felt bad enough for being the cause of Adam\u2019s near death\u2026and if he died\u2026well, I just didn\u2019t want to think that way right then. All I had my mind on was finding Lonnie and making him pay for what he\u2019d done to my brother.<\/p>\n I rode hard, pushing Cochise to make up for lost time. If, in fact, Lonnie had found a back way off the butte, he could be clear to California by now. Didn\u2019t matter, I thought, I\u2019d follow him to hell and back if need be.<\/p>\n It took more than an hour to reach Half Butte and then I had to stop and rest my horse. Cooch was lathered so I took off my hat and filled it with water from my canteen and gave him a drink\u2026not too much, but enough. Then I soaked my neckerchief and cooled myself off. After I figured my mount had rested enough, I mounted up again and began searching for the back door, so to speak. Another half hour passed, but I found it and was even lucky enough to pick up Stokes\u2019 trail. Sure enough he was headed for California. I\u2019d be darned if he was going to get away, not if I could help it.<\/p>\n I followed the rocky path for several miles and then just as suddenly as I found it, I lost it. I made several circles where it ended but it made no sense to me\u2026it was as if the trail had vanished, or never had been. I got an uneasy feeling down deep in my gut and suddenly recalled my father and older brothers always telling me to follow my instinct. So I dismounted and began walking slowly. Ahead of me was a large group of rocks and I briefly wondered if Lonnie were up there, watching me. I loosened the tiny strap from around my pistol\u2019s trigger that held the .45 securely in its holster.<\/p>\n The sun was hot, beating down on my head; the air was thick and before long I had broke out in a sweat that kept running down my brow and into my eyes. I looked up at the sun and then just as quickly wished I hadn\u2019t for it nearly blinded me. That\u2019s when I heard the sound of rocks falling up ahead. I tried to get my eyes in focus but it was too late. I heard the shot before it hit my right shoulder, just inches from where I was hit the day before. The force of the bullet caused me to stumble backwards. The pain burned but I didn\u2019t take time to try to see how badly I was hurt. I could hear the sound of laughing and knew without a doubt that it was Lonnie. I scrambled behind a boulder and glanced quickly at my upper arm; it was just grazed but it was deep and the blood flowed freely, staining my shirt and jacket. I jerked my neck-scarf off and quickly wrapped it around the wound.<\/p>\n Small rocks rolled down the bigger ones, telling me that Lonnie was somewhere higher up than I was. I scanned the rock formations, hoping to locate my attacker, but he was well hidden. As I glanced around at my surroundings, I was dismayed to find myself at a disadvantage. I was on lower ground and the rocks overhead made almost a complete circle around me; it appeared that Lonnie could move in any direction, catching me from behind or the side and still maintain a perfect shot at me. I suddenly felt like one of those little sitting ducks at a carnival. I scooted closer into the rock where I was hiding but kept scanning the ones overhead. I knew that sooner or later, Lonnie would make his move, I had to be ready, I had to stay alert if I planned on getting out of there alive. Pa\u2019s warning suddenly loomed large before me\u2026today he might very well lose two sons instead of one. I wondered how he\u2019d manage\u2026he and Hoss.<\/p>\n The thought was just passing though my mind when I caught a glimpse of something shining, like the sun had reflected off the end of a gun. I stared at the spot for so long that I was beginning to think I had imagined the whole thing. I had my gun in my hand but slipped it back into my holster just long enough to tighten the makeshift bandage on my arm. I think the wound had stopped bleeding, it hadn\u2019t eased up the hurting though.<\/p>\n \u201cTurn around, Cartwright\u2026slowly\u2026and keep you hand away from your side.\u201d<\/p>\n \u2018Damn,\u2019 I muttered to myself. I\u2019d let Lonnie get the drop on me after all.<\/p>\n \u201cDo it Little Joe\u2026at this point, I\u2019d just as soon shoot you in the back as well as that high and mighty brother of yours!\u201d<\/p>\n I was beyond being angry\u2026I was outraged, but most of it was directed at myself. My mind\u2019s eye conjured up the image of my battered father, my dying brother\u2026the sheriff with his skull cracked\u2026if it had been\u2026and festered hatred toward this kid erupted and spilled into my guts. I turned around, my eyes were still burning from the sun rays but I could see him. Lonnie Stokes towered over me, standing high on a rock several yards from where I\u2019d been hiding. He looked older, more mature, more worldly\u2026how many men had he killed?<\/p>\n I kept my eyes on him as he moved downward. His dark ebony eyes never left my face. He was waiting, hoping that I would make a move for my gun, but I wasn\u2019t about to give him that satisfaction\u2026I knew how fast he was\u2026now\u2026and how deadly his game was. The sweat beads were salty as they dripped from my brow. I stood facing the sun\u2026not a good place to be when someone\u2019s expecting you to go for your gun, but I knew the kid had planned it that way. Did he for a fraction of a second fear that I might actually be faster than he?<\/p>\n He\u2019d move down enough that now we stood pretty much even, you know, eye to eye. He was sweating too and I saw him flexing his fingers on his gun hand.<\/p>\n \u201cYour brother\u2026is he dead?\u201d Lonnie asked me.<\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t know\u2026he was still alive when I rode out a while ago.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s your fault you know\u2026if he dies, I mean\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHow do you figure that?\u201d Why on earth were we having this stupid conversation? Why not draw and get this thing over with?<\/p>\n \u201cCause, you should have fought me when I first approached you\u2026you made me shoot your brother\u2026I promised you, you\u2019d face me, eventually\u2026\u201d he gleamed.<\/p>\n \u201cI suppose you did at that.\u201d I swallowed, he lowered his hand just a smidgeon. \u201cI wouldn\u2019t do that, Lonnie\u2026unless you\u2019re ready to die\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I saw his eyes widened just a bit. \u201cWhat makes you so sure I\u2019ll be the one dying today?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cBecause\u2026I\u2019m faster\u2026and older\u2026more experienced. You\u2019re still a boy\u2026\u201d God, that sounded like something one of my brothers or my father would say to me!<\/p>\n I noticed Lonnie flinch. He tossed his head slightly to sling the sweat away from his eyes, which he squinted because of the sun.<\/p>\n \u201cWhy don\u2019t you just give it up Stokes? Toss down your weapon and ride back to town with me\u2026I\u2019ll see that you get a fair trial\u2026you haven\u2019t murdered anyone yet\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n Lonnie snickered, but it was only half-hearted.<\/p>\n \u201cYou\u2019re shaking, Lonnie\u2026come on, toss down the gun\u2026don\u2019t make me kill you\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYou might be the one dying\u2026instead of me\u2026\u201d he dared.<\/p>\n \u201cWhy take that chance?\u201d I offered, hoping he\u2019d back down. I promised Pa I wouldn\u2019t do anything I\u2019d regret later, but if the kid didn\u2019t give it up, I\u2019d be forced to shoot him\u2026in self-defense\u2026but\u2026<\/p>\n \u201cGet ready to die, Cartwright!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNO, LONNIE\u2026DON\u201dT DO IT!!\u201d I shouted, but it was too late, he\u2019d already made his move. I made mine a second later\u2026almost too late. His aim was off because I moved sideways; I heard the bullet whiz over the top of my head. My pistol was drawn but I didn\u2019t shoot\u2026I didn\u2019t want to kill a seventeen-year old boy! I ducked behind the rock. Lonnie screamed at me\u2026something about being a coward\u2026too afraid to face him, man to man. Didn\u2019t the little fool realize I was trying to save his darn life\u2026both our lives?<\/p>\n When I dared to peek over the top of the rock, it only served to cost me my hat. His bullet sent the Stetson flying off my head, quickly I ducked back down and waited. For several moments there was nothing; I raised my head\u2026my hand was stretched out, resting the weight of my pistol atop the boulder\u2026there he was\u2026BANG!<\/p>\n My weapon went flying out of my hand and landed several feet from me. I heard Lonnie laughing and caught a glimpse of him as he darted behind the nearest rock from him. I eyed my gun glistening in the sun and quickly crawled from behind my rock hiding place and attempted to snatch my weapon from its dusty resting place. My fingers brushed the shiny chrome\u2026and then were smashed beneath the weight of a man\u2019s booted foot\u2026Lonnie\u2019s boot. I couldn\u2019t move my hand; his body shadowed the sun from my face as I looked up into his\u2026<\/p>\n Lonnie said nothing, just towered over me, staring down into my face. I knew my eyes must have betrayed my fear, but Lonnie didn\u2019t notice, he just ground his boot harder against my left hand. It hurt like hell and I knew I had to do something, the man was sick\u2026he wanted me dead and I had the sense that now he\u2019d enjoy watching me die\u2026slowly. I moved my legs until I could wrap them about his and pulled with all my strength. Lonnie lost his balance and stumbled backward, losing his balance and dropping his gun. Now the advantage was mine, I ignored the pain in my arm and the stinging sensation in my left hand as I grabbed the front of Lonnie\u2019s shirt and hauled him to his feet. He began to fight me then, taking a swing with his knotted fist, he barely missed my lower jaw. I pushed him back just a pace and then hit him hard with my left fist\u2026OH GOD!!! It hurt\u2026the pain shot up my arm and into my shoulder and neck and finally into my head. I almost screamed!<\/p>\n But Stokes was on the ground, groaning while I took a moment to rub my balled up fist. I failed to notice that when he fell, he fell well within reach of his pistol. I saw him scrambling to get to it and I spun around, looking for mine. I spied it just inches away. I made a daring dive for my weapon, heard the blast from his and felt another surging pain graze my upper thigh, but I had my hand around the butt of my gun. I rolled over, Lonnie was clambering to get up, pointing his pistol again at me. He fired, but this time I managed to roll away, he fired again but this time, I fired back\u2026striking the boy in the chest.<\/p>\n For what seemed an eternity, Lonnie stood frozen to the spot, eyes wide in shock, disbelieving that he\u2019d been struck. I jumped to my feet, gun lowered but still grasped in my throbbing fist.<\/p>\n \u201cFast\u2026\u201d he moaned. \u201cYou\u2026were\u2026faster,\u201d he cried as his body slipped to the ground. Grief and repulsion at what I\u2019d committed washed over my being. I hurried to his side, gently lifting his head into my lap. I felt sick\u2026like I might vomit\u2026blood gushed from the boy\u2019s wound. Common sense told me I\u2019d been justified in firing back\u2026but the fact that here, in my arms was a seventeen-year old boy\u2026a man\u2019s son\u2026someone\u2019s brother perhaps\u2026and I\u2019d just killed him.<\/p>\n I looked down at the boy I thought I hated, but the hate was gone\u2026only sorrow lingered to sop up the remnants of whatever dark emotions I\u2019d been feeling before.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m sorry,\u201d I muttered as Lonnie\u2019s body arched in death and the air was forced to expel from his lungs for the final time. I shut my eyes, squeezing tightly\u2026wishing that I could turn back the clock and\u2026<\/p>\n \u201cJoseph?\u201d<\/p>\n I swallowed, thinking I\u2019d heard my father calling my name\u2026God\u2026is that how a guilty conscience works?<\/p>\n \u201cSon?\u201d And then I felt tender hands on my shoulders and when I looked up, Pa was behind me, forcing me to surrender Lonnie\u2019s body into the gentle hands of my brother, Hoss. Pa pulled me to my feet and turned me around to face him, I swayed, unable to put my weight on my leg. I had yet to say anything, I couldn\u2019t talk\u2026it was like this whole thing was a bad dream and that any minute now I\u2019d wake up and find my father sitting at my bedside\u2026like he\u2019d been doing for Adam.<\/p>\n \u201cYou\u2019re hurt\u2026come over here and let me take a look at that leg\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I let myself be guided over to a rock, leaning against my father for support and when Pa told me to sit, I sat.<\/p>\n \u201cDoesn\u2019t look too bad, seems to just be grazed\u2026how\u2019s the hand?\u201d he asked me.<\/p>\n I looked up, but it was hard to see his face; blinding tears were making it practically impossible. Pa squatted down in front of me.<\/p>\n \u201cJoe?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2026didn\u2019t\u2026set out\u2026to kill him\u2026honest, Pa\u2026\u201d I tried to explain. \u201cI\u2026just wanted\u2026to find him and bring\u2026him back\u2026to\u2026town\u2026I\u2026wanted him to\u2026pay for\u2026what he\u2019d\u2026done to Adam\u2026\u201d The tears rolled freely down my face and dripped onto the knees of my father\u2019s trousers.<\/p>\n \u201cI know that son\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNo\u2026you don\u2019t\u2026understand\u2026I\u2026didn\u2019t mean\u2026to\u2026kill him\u2026at first, Pa\u2026I did\u2026but then\u2026when you said\u2026what you said about\u2026today you might\u2026lose two sons\u2026instead of just one\u2026well\u2026I\u2026felt\u2026different. I was only\u2026going to make\u2026him come back\u2026with me\u2026but he pinned me down in the rocks. And he shot me for no reason. I tried to reason with him\u2026but he wouldn\u2019t listen. I had\u2026to\u2026kill him, Pa\u2026or\u2026be killed.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWe know son\u2026we were riding up the trail and saw what happened. We would have tried to stop this, but we were just too far away\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m sorry, Pa\u2026for everything\u2026disobeying you\u2026for killing the boy\u2026for getting Adam hurt\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cShh\u2026we\u2019ll talk about all that later. Right now, let\u2019s get you back to town and let the doctor take a look at this leg and arm\u2026and this hand. I think you\u2019ve got a couple broken fingers, son\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I let the weight of my body be supported by my father\u2019s body. I needed his strength, his comfort\u2026I\u2019d just killed a boy\u2026a boy\u2026just two years younger than me and the taste of death left a dull throbbing pain in my heart and a sour, bitter taste in my mouth. My stomach rumbled and I was forced to pull away from my father, turning my head just in time to keep him from being splattered with the vile gush of phlegm that spewed forth from my gut.<\/p>\n \u201cHoss, get some water,\u201d I heard Pa tell my brother.<\/p>\n Pa wet his neck scarf, rang it out and then handed it to me. I took it, spread it opened and then buried my face in it, cooling me off instantly. I felt horrible\u2026<\/p>\n \u201cAre you alright now, son?\u201d<\/p>\n I could only nod my head. When I wiped my lips, Hoss handed me the canteen and I took a swig to rinse out my mouth.<\/p>\n \u201cThanks,\u201d I told him. I glanced over at my father; he was watching me closely. \u201cI\u2019m sorry\u2026I just got sick to my stomach\u2026\u201d I tried to explain. The words jammed together in my throat, my eyes watered and then he was there, holding me in his strong arms. It felt good, having my father\u2019s assurance there, in an unspoken gesture of support.<\/p>\n \u201cHe\u2026was\u2026just a boy\u2026\u201d I said it over and over and the words rang loud in my ears. \u201cI\u2026killed a\u2026kid\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cJoseph,\u201d my father said, gently lifting my head so that he looked directly into my eyes. \u201cI know you didn\u2019t want to do it, but if you hadn\u2019t killed him, he would have killed you. You could be the one tied across your horse instead of Lonnie\u2026I could have lost a son today\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I took a deep breath\u2026I had to ask\u2026I had to know\u2026<\/p>\n \u201cPa\u2026then you believe me\u2026that I didn\u2019t come out here with the intent to kill him\u2026that I only meant to bring him back to stand trial?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cJoseph, son, sometimes you worry me\u2026what with that quick temper of yours. I\u2019ll be honest enough to say, the thought did occur to me\u2026but then Adam told me I was foolish for believing that you could actually murder someone\u2026especially a boy\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cAdam? He talked to you?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYes\u2026and chastised me for not giving you more credit\u2026he said something to the effect that \u2018Little Joe is your son\u2026your flesh and blood\u2026can you doubt yourself as well\u2019? It sort of stopped me cold\u2026I apologize for doubting you son, for questioning your motives. Adam was right\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n I couldn\u2019t help but to grin at Pa\u2026 \u201cIsn\u2019t he usually?\u201d I muttered, causing my father to laugh lightly.<\/p>\n \u201cI hate to admit that\u2026so, let\u2019s not tell him, agreed\u2026we\u2019d never hear the end of it you know?\u201d<\/p>\n I limped along with my pa to the horses, relieved that this whole mess was over and over-joyed to learn that Adam was going to be alright.<\/p>\n \u201cAgreed,\u201d I muttered, smiling at Pa, who seldom admitted defeat! It was indeed a rare moment.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019ll tell this much,\u201d Hoss said as he gathered Lonnie\u2019s body and his horse for the ride back to town.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat\u2019s that, son?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cThere\u2019s just too many fast guns \u2018round here to suit me!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNot anymore,\u201d Pa said, glancing over at the boy who, because of his vanity, now lay dead. \u201cLeast ways\u2026I hope not,\u201d he said, looking questioningly at me.<\/p>\n \u201cNot anymore, Pa\u2026\u201d I answered, knowing full well what he meant.<\/p>\n Pa smiled and the relief he felt flooded his eyes and suddenly all the worry I\u2019d seen for days on his face disappeared.<\/p>\n \u201cCome on, let\u2019s get back to town\u2026Adam\u2019s waiting for us\u2026I think he\u2019s about ready to go home.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cSo\u2026am\u2026I\u2026\u201d Hoss chirped.<\/p>\n \u201cThat makes three of us\u2026\u201d I said, agreeing, I was anxious to get home and have things settled between Adam and I and everything else back to normal.<\/p>\n \u201cFour\u2026make that four!\u201d Pa added, summing up all our feelings. March 2006<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n
\n\u201cJoseph, I want you to stay clear of that young man, do you understand me?\u201d<\/p>\n
\n\u201cPa\u2026don\u2019t worry, I\u2019m not going to let that kid gourd me into doing something stupid. I\u2019ve heard the talk around town, he\u2019s been showing off, trying to prove how fast he is\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\nThe ride into town was long and hot as it usually is in mid-August. The grass was brown and dried by the sun and the earth bore deep wide cracks from lack of rain. By the time my brother and I reached the out skirts of town, we were drenched with sweat and felt as if we were dying of thirst. We stopped in front of the bank.<\/p>\n
\nWhen I finished my business and was on my way over to the saloon, Lonnie Stokes suddenly appeared before me. I stopped in my tracks and quickly glanced around. I hadn\u2019t noticed until that moment the small group of spectators that had been following along behind me. Apparently, they had suspected that something was about to happen. I chided myself for not being more alert to what was going on around me. Lonnie stood with his back to the sun, putting me at a disadvantage. His legs were slightly apart, his hand midway to his sides. He glared at me, daringly, and I glared back but for only a moment and then moved on to the other side of the street. From the corner of my eye, I could see Lonnie moving along with the growing crowd that was now following us.<\/p>\n
\n\u201cIt\u2019s not much more than a scratch, Little Joe,\u201d the doctor told me.<\/p>\n
\n\u201cI only have one thing to say to you Cartwright\u2026meet me in the street\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\nAnd that\u2019s where I stayed for the next two weeks. Roy had dropped by the next day after Adam and I had been in town to tell us that he had run Lonnie Stokes out of town for good, with the promise to the young man that if he ever came back he\u2019d go to jail for good long time.<\/p>\n
\n\u201cJoe, you and Adam stable the horses down at the livery, Hoss and I\u2019ll go on ahead, we\u2019ll meet you in about ten minutes,\u201d Pa told my brothers.<\/p>\n
\nIt was much later that night, as Pa, Hoss and I sat in the waiting room wishing the doc would hurry up and come tell us something about Adam. I was nervous and couldn\u2019t sit still so I paced the room. I could feel Pa\u2019s eyes watching me, and the thought ran through my head that he probably blamed me for what happened to Adam. No matter, I blamed myself. Adam had been right all along, I should have listened to him and pressed charges against Lonnie Stokes. Had I taken my brother\u2019s advice, Adam wouldn\u2019t be lying in the back room suffering on my account\u2026or perhaps dying.<\/p>\n
\nThe news wasn\u2019t the best\u2026and certainly not what I wanted to hear. But Adam had a fighting chance. The bullet had buried itself deeply in his back and Doc Martin had done surgery on my brother to remove the slug. It had taken a couple of hours; that had explained the length of time that Pa, Hoss and I had been left alone to wonder Adam\u2019s fate. A lot of blood had been lost the doc said, more than he would have liked and Adam remained unconscious. The physician assured us that as of right then, Adam wasn\u2019t feeling anything but that once he came around, he would be given some medication to dull the pain. It would take a long time for Adam to get his strength back and that meant many days confined to bed with lots of rest and good food. The good food we\u2019d leave up to Hop Sing, our cook, he\u2019d know exactly what to fix for Adam that would speed his recovery, after all, Hop Sing had been nursemaid to all of us at various times in our lives.<\/p>\n
\nThe night at last gave way to morning, through gray and dreary. It looked like it might rain, what with the dark clouds billowing on the horizon back toward Carson City. We could use a bit of rain, everything for miles around was beginning to look dried and brush fires were always a major worry for the farmers and ranchers down in the valleys.<\/p>\n
\nI don\u2019t know how long I\u2019d been sitting beside the bed, but my anger had abated some though the hate still festered. I was feeling drowsy and was almost asleep when the door burst opened rather loudly and banged against the wall. I jerked my head up, glancing down at Adam who stirred slightly and then, hearing a noise behind me, spun around to find my father standing in the doorway, his appearance in disarray.<\/p>\n
\nI\u2019ll always remember that night as one of the longest I\u2019ve ever lived through. Adam took a turn for the worse, his fever spiked and we spent the greater part of our time, keeping him cooled off with damp cloths and cool water. I waited anxiously for word from the sheriff, telling us that he and his men had caught up to Lonnie Stokes, but word never came. And then, after what seemed a lifetime, it was morning, Adam was resting and Pa and I stood outside of Doc\u2019s office, sipping coffee. Hoss had ridden out with the posse and wasn\u2019t expected back for several more hours, but it was a surprise when we heard the sound of pounding hooves and looked down the street and saw the sheriff and his men riding into town. I scanned the crowd for the back shooter but couldn\u2019t find his face among the group of men so I decided to walk on down to the jail and see what was going on. Hoss was just dismounting so I made my way over to him.<\/p>\n
\nTHE END<\/p>\n