Summary:\u00a0<\/b> When Hoss is left on his own to run the ranch, he begins to doubt his ability in himself and in everything that his father had tried to teach him.<\/p>\n
Rated PG \u00a0WC 4850<\/p>\n
The Awakening<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/p>\n Hoss placed his oversized hat<\/strong> on the peg beside the sideboard and gently closed the heavy door that graced the front of the massive ranch house that had been home to the Cartwright\u2019s for many years.\u00a0 The sound of the door closing rang hollow in the now empty house, empty of every thing that is except the furnishings.<\/p>\n Hoss walked to the mahogany table that stood behind the settee and looked about the room, memories flooded his mind as the tears gathered in his clear blue eyes.\u00a0 Without realizing what he was doing, Hoss gently ran his fingers over the carved statue of a horse that reared its front legs high in the air.\u00a0 The carving had been a gift to his father several years ago, one that he had treasured.<\/p>\n Hoss sighed deeply, feeling the loneliness of his surroundings beginning to take control of his thoughts.\u00a0 Walking around the settee he sat in the wine colored leather chair that his father had claimed years earlier as his favorite seat in the house.\u00a0 He had at some time or other held each of his sons in his lap encircled in his arms while sitting in this chair.\u00a0 Imagines of those times filtered through Hoss\u2019 mind\u2019s eye.\u00a0 Hoss ran his hands across the soft leather and picked up the pipe that his father had smoked just days earlier.\u00a0 He could smell the scent of Ben\u2019s favorite pipe tobacco that was still in the pipe, Ben having forgotten to knock it out when he had finished.\u00a0 The memory brought tears to the surface of his eyes and overflowed down his cheeks.<\/p>\n \u201cWhy Pa, why didn\u2019t you listen to me?\u201d cried Hoss\u2019 broken heart.<\/p>\n Hoss wiped the tears with the back of his hand and looked at the blue velvet chair that sat opposite from him.\u00a0 The book of Shakespeare lay open on the table beside it, an unspoken reminder that his older brother, Adam, had laid the book aside as if he would be returning shortly.\u00a0 But Hoss knew differently, Adam would never return, not now, not later, and not ever.<\/p>\n Leaning over, Hoss ran his hands across the low wide-boarded table that sat in front of the massive fireplace and his thoughts turned to his youngest brother, Little Joe.\u00a0 How many times in the boy\u2019s short eighteen years had he been reminded to \u2018take your feet off of the furniture, young man\u2019, thought Hoss.\u00a0 Sobs racked his body as he thought of his young brother.\u00a0 No more would he be able to hear his laughter ringing from every room, no more would he be partner to his brother\u2019s outlandish schemes, and no more the need for covering up the trouble that had always seemed to find the youngster.<\/p>\n Hoss stopped the scream that had surfaced though he wanted to vent his anger, his frustrations and his grief.\u00a0 Moving to the settee he allowed his large frame to drop to the comfort of the cushions.\u00a0 His eyes traveled around the room once again, how could he go on?\u00a0 How would he manage?\u00a0 His mind was a jumble of mixed thoughts, his heart a jumble of emotions, all wanting to surface at the same time.\u00a0 Hoss buried his face in his hands and allowed the tears to tumble down his cheeks, spotting his crisp white shirt.\u00a0 He tugged at his black string tie until it came loose from around his neck and carelessly tossed it onto the table in front of him.<\/p>\n Thinking that he heard a noise, Hoss glanced toward the stairs but saw nothing.\u00a0 What he imagined was the Christmas tree, beautifully decorated, presents safely tucked under the oversized pine, the candles carefully lit and glowing in the soft evening light.\u00a0 He imagined he heard the voices of his family as they sang their favorite carols, Ben\u2019s deep rich baritone voice, Adam\u2019s voice smooth and sure, and Little Joe\u2019s high-pitched, cracking voice that was still part boy but struggling to be manly in its sounds.\u00a0 Memories of past Christmases came into mind.\u00a0 Happier times with his family, times when they laughed, joked and shared tender moments with each other and times when all was well in his world, a world now void of his family and the love that the four men, young and old alike had shared.<\/p>\n \u201cPa, how in the world will I be able to handle all of this?\u00a0 I can\u2019t do this, not alone, not without you!\u00a0 You have always been there for me; Adam has always encouraged me, Little Joe, well, you know how he is, was, always laughing with me, not at me.\u00a0 God, Pa, I miss all of you so much!\u00a0 Why couldn\u2019t I have been the one? Death would have been welcomed compared to the grief and sorrow I am feeling now.\u00a0 My heart hurts so that I fear it\u2019s gonna break apart if the pain don\u2019t stop,\u201d Hoss sobbed softly.<\/p>\n \u201cPlease, make it stop, Pa, please.\u00a0 Oh God, stop the hurt!\u201d Hoss cried, not realizing he had spoken out loud.<\/p>\n \u201cHoss, give it time son, the pain will ease.\u00a0 You have to be patient, you have to try Hoss, just keep trying, we will all stay close by,\u201d came the whisperings.<\/p>\n Hoss laid his head on the red pillow that graced the settee and closed his eyes.\u00a0 How had such an accident happened?\u00a0 He had been having bad feelings regarding the plan that was going to be put into action and had voiced his concerns to his father and when Pa had brushed them off he had turned to Adam who had seemed to turn a deaf ear to his worries.<\/p>\n They were planning on going down into the cave that worked its way deeply into the mountain.\u00a0 The plan had been to place small amounts of nitroglycerin every few yards in order to carefully blast out the walls.\u00a0 The plan did not include his father and two brothers going into the tunnel along with the nitro man who was to plant the explosives.\u00a0 How and why his family members had entered the tunnel had yet to be explained to him.\u00a0 But entered they had, along with ten other workers.\u00a0 It was told to him that what probably happened was the nitro was dropped, causing a huge explosion, and where once there had been a mountain, now there was nothing.\u00a0 Gone, as if it had never existed, and along with it, the lives of three of the most important people who had made up the center of Hoss\u2019 world.<\/p>\n \u201cPa\u2026Pa\u2026\u201dcried out Hoss.<\/p>\n \u201cShh\u2026son, it\u2019s okay, Pa\u2019s here\u2026you will be fine son, I promise.\u201d\u00a0 Ben spoke to his son.<\/p>\n Hoss opened his eyes, had he really heard his father speaking to him?\u00a0 Hoss looked around the room but not seeing anyone he realized he had been dreaming.<\/p>\n \u201cJoe\u2026where are you little buddy?\u201d\u00a0 Hoss\u2019 heart asked out loud.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m here, Hoss.\u00a0 I haven\u2019t left you, I\u2019ll always be close by, you know that,\u201d laughed Little Joe softly.<\/p>\n Hoss sat up and rubbed his eyes.\u00a0 \u201cI better get to doin\u2019 something, afore I go crazy.\u201d<\/p>\n And with that Hoss made his way up the stairs to change his clothes.\u00a0 No matter that he had just come from a memorial service for his family, there were still chores to be done.\u00a0 He knew that his father would not be happy with him if he neglected them and allowed things to run amuck.\u00a0 There were animals to feed, orders to be given to the hands, plans to be made, God, there was so much to do.\u00a0 The weight of his burden was baring down on his large shoulders and he tried his best to overcome his feelings of inadequacies.\u00a0 His father had raised him and trained him for the jobs that he now had to take over and command.\u00a0 His father had driven into each of his three sons the knowledge that was needed to be able to hold things together in case such a thing as this tragedy happened.\u00a0 Hoss filled his lungs, and silently promised his father that he would do all he could in his power to keep the dream alive.<\/p>\n Hoss made his way to the barn and opened the door.\u00a0 As he entered, he stopped momentarily to allow his eyes to adjust to the dim light.\u00a0 A soft whiny came from the stall closest to him and he turned to look at the pinto that was stretching her neck out to him.<\/p>\n \u201cHey ya, girl.\u00a0 You miss him too don\u2019t ya?\u201d Hoss said as he reached out his hand and petted his youngest brother\u2019s horse.\u00a0 Hoss thought back to the day that Little Joe had received his horse.\u00a0 Pa had given Cochise to Joe for his birthday.\u00a0 Joe had been tickled pink at the surprise, hopping around and yelling, laughing and crying, all at the same time.\u00a0 Then later when Joe had accidentally shot their neighbor\u2019s bull, Joe had willingly sold his horse to pay for the damages he owed for the bull.\u00a0 Pa had really been proud of Joe for being so unselfish and had on his next birthday, returned his prize possession to him as a gift.\u00a0 Joe had for the second time, leaped for joy, kissing and hugging all of them.\u00a0 Laughing, Hoss remembered that he and Adam had had no idea what their father had been cooking up and were just as surprised to see the horse standing in the yard on Joe\u2019s seventeenth birthday as Joe had been.<\/p>\n \u201cGolly, was that just a year ago?\u201d thought Hoss to himself.<\/p>\n Hoss walked to the back of the barn and stopped at his brother Adam\u2019s horse.\u00a0 Sport had pulled a ligament in his foreleg a week earlier and Hoss had been doctoring it for Adam.\u00a0 Hoss knelt down and lifted the horse\u2019s leg, feeling down the length of it checking the healing process.\u00a0 He seemed fine as far as Hoss could tell; there seemed to be no swelling and Sport didn\u2019t act as if he were in pain.<\/p>\n \u201cDon\u2019t worry Adam, I\u2019ll take care of Sport for you.\u00a0 I promise, I\u2019ll make sure his leg is fully healed before I exercise him,\u201d Hoss said to the walls.<\/p>\n \u201cDon\u2019t concern yourself Hoss, I know you will take care of him.\u00a0 You always have and I know you will continue to do so,\u201d whispered Adam.<\/p>\n Hoss suddenly turned from his kneeling position and nervously glanced around the barn.\u00a0 He could have sworn that he had heard his brother speaking to him.<\/p>\n \u201cI must be going crazy,\u201d he thought.<\/p>\n When Hoss finished all the evening chores, he started toward the house but stopped halfway across the yard.\u00a0 He stood and gazed at the home that had been built with love by his father.\u00a0 It had been an accomplishment that had become a source of pride for Pa. Built by his own hands and with the help of Adam, himself, and a few good friends that his father had made, it was the home that had become the center of their ranch, the Ponderosa.\u00a0 The first Cartwright to be born on the Ponderosa had been born in this very house and he had been a tiny curly headed little fella who throughout the years had become the very heart of this home and this ranch.<\/p>\n In this house, he and his family had known good times, happy times, and yet they had experienced hard times and bad times.\u00a0 Death had knocked more than once on their door.\u00a0 Marie, Little Joe\u2019s mother, had been his Pa\u2019s third wife and the only mother that he had ever known.\u00a0 She had died suddenly and tragically from a fall from a horse, leaving behind a grieving husband and three young sons.\u00a0 Now death had knocked again, this time much harder, and when the grim reaper departed he had taken from him the remainder of his family.<\/p>\n Hoss was not sure he could even re-enter the house.\u00a0 It was too quiet, too sad, and he felt more alone than he had ever felt in his entire life.\u00a0 His father would not be greeting him this time, Adam would not be strumming his guitar and Little Joe would not be begging him for a game of checkers.\u00a0 Hoss wondered if Little Joe had ever realized that he had always known that his younger brother cheated from time to time.\u00a0 He had never let on; he just let Little Joe play the game and win, it had seemed to have always made him happy.\u00a0 In return Joe\u2019s happiness had made him happy.<\/p>\n \u201cWell,\u201d thought Hoss, \u201cI can\u2019t sleep out here.\u00a0 And I know Hop Sing has supper ready, might as well go in.\u201d<\/p>\n Hoss had been right, Hop Sing was just putting his supper on the table when Hoss appeared at the door.<\/p>\n \u201cYou come eat now, Mister Hoss, you keep up strength, you have much work to do now,\u201d encouraged Hop Sing.<\/p>\n Hop Sing was as sad as Hoss, the Cartwrights had been his family also; he had been with them since before Little Joe had been born.\u00a0 He had seen them through the good times and the hard times, same as Mister Hoss had been there.\u00a0 Now his own heart ached for the family that would never again sit at the large table and enjoy his cooking.\u00a0 Never again could he mumble to them in his native tongue, and never again would he threaten to return to his homeland of China.<\/p>\n He wondered if the family had ever understood what he had always said when he shouted at them in Chinese?\u00a0 He didn\u2019t think so, at least Mister Cartwright and Adam had not, but he was fairly certain that Little Joe had understood most of it.\u00a0 Hop Sing reasoned that had been because Little Joe had spent many happy hours with him after the death of the boy\u2019s mother and he had picked up on many words and phrases that the little man had spoken.<\/p>\n The loss of his family saddened him but the loss of the boy whom he had helped to raise and who was loved as if he had been Hop Sing\u2019s own, brought the tears to his eyes.\u00a0 Now all he had left of the family he claimed as his own was the big softhearted man-child named Hoss.\u00a0 Hop Sing\u2019s heart cried for the boy.\u00a0 Seeing him sitting alone at the big table, very much aware of the missing faces and seeing tears drip from his chin into his plate was more than the Chinaman could bare and he returned to his kitchen and dabbed at his own tears.<\/p>\n After supper Hoss climbed the stairs to his room.\u00a0 He thought there was no way he was going to sit downstairs by himself.\u00a0 The memories that had plagued his mind during the day had begun to take a toll on his body.\u00a0 He was tired, weary and depressed.\u00a0 All he could think of was sleep and the warm bed that waited for him.\u00a0 Stripping down and slipping on his nightshirt, Hoss blew out his lamp and crawled into the comforts of his bed.<\/p>\n Sleep was slow in coming for Hoss.\u00a0 Try as he might, he could not shake the thoughts and memories that continued to march through his mind and across his heart.\u00a0 Pa, tall and brave, he had always been his hero, thought Hoss.\u00a0 Strict and firm yet fair and just, he could stop a man in their tracks when his voice boomed, it sure had stopped him on more than one occasion he laughed.\u00a0 How many nights had his father sat at his bedside when he had been sick or injured?\u00a0 How many nights had he cried and prayed to his God for his son\u2019s recovery?\u00a0 More nights than he could count.\u00a0 Pa had been the one person who he had always been able to count on, his father, his teacher, and his mother in a sense, his companion, a steady influence in his life and a man he loved and admire, worshipped and the man he would most like to become.<\/p>\n \u201cI promise ya Pa, I will make ya proud of me,\u201d Hoss whispered into the night.<\/p>\n \u201cI am proud of you Hoss, I always have been son, don\u2019t you ever forget that,\u201d answered Pa.<\/p>\n Thoughts of Adam invaded him next.\u00a0 Adam had been more than just a brother to him; it had been Adam who he had turned to after the death of their mother, Marie.\u00a0 Pa had gone into such a depression that he had turned away from his sons and Adam had been there to fill in for him until Pa could pull himself back together.\u00a0 Adam and he had shared secrets. Hoss had found himself telling Adam things that he dared not tell anyone else, even his beloved father.\u00a0 Adam never judged him; he had always given him sound honest advice, and encouragement.\u00a0 Adam had treated him as an equal and not so much as a little brother.\u00a0 He had fought for him, defending him against bullies, and against anyone and anything that had threatened him, even against himself at times.<\/p>\n \u201cThank you Adam, for being here for me,\u201d Hoss told the dark.<\/p>\n \u201cAnytime \u2018big\u2019 brother.\u201d<\/p>\n The words had seemed to be so very close to his ear, yet Hoss knew he was imagining things again.\u00a0 He wondered how long these feelings would last.\u00a0 He knew that when people were as close to each other as he and his family had been things like this were known to happen.\u00a0 He couldn\u2019t really say that he minded; it made it seem as if they were still with him and he found himself hoping that those feelings would continue staying with him forever.<\/p>\n As he turned on his side, Hoss thought he caught a glimpse of Little Joe in the soft glow of the moon that shone through the window.<\/p>\n \u201cJoe? Is that you little buddy?\u201d Hoss asked as he raised his head from the pillow. \u201cWhat are you doing in here?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cThought I would stay with you for awhile, til you fell asleep. Is that okay with you?\u201d Little Joe asked, his voice seeming to be very clear and near to Hoss\u2019 way of thinking.<\/p>\n \u201cSure, guess ya can if\u2019n ya wanna,\u201d said Hoss out loud.<\/p>\n \u201cDadburn it,\u201d said Hoss to himself, \u201cnow I\u2019m talkin\u2019 to ghost!\u201d\u00a0 Hoss could not help but smile to himself in the dark.<\/p>\n Joe of all people, a ghost, thought Hoss.\u00a0 He wondered how Joe was dealing with that fact and he hoped that Joe wasn\u2019t scared, things like that had always frightened the young boy, that and the dark.\u00a0 Hopefully Joe had gone to a brighter place where the light was said to always shine and Hoss prayed that his family would be together.<\/p>\n Hoss tossed and turned in the bed, trying in vain to find a comfortable spot.\u00a0 Death was so final, and Hoss realized that he knew so little about what happens to someone when they pass from this life into the next life.\u00a0 Now he wished that he had paid more attention to the preacher when attending Sunday services.\u00a0 But he and Joe had usually ended up in trouble, neither could sit still for very long periods of time, especially that younger brother of his, he sure had gotten him in a ton of trouble over the course of his lifetime; and not always on Sundays either!<\/p>\n Several times during the night, Hoss had awakened from sleep trembling and finding himself shivering and cold yet hot at the same time.\u00a0 Imagines of his father and brothers flashed before his eyes and in his sleep he called out to them, begging them to return to him.\u00a0 He pleaded with them not to leave him, to please stay, he was afraid of being left alone.\u00a0 He cried for his father, longing to feel his father\u2019s arms around him and holding him in a tight embrace.\u00a0 This caused memories of his childhood to flow into his mind and clutch at his heart causing him difficulty in breathing.<\/p>\n Hoss tried to rise from the bed but felt as if strong arms where holding him down, forcing him to return his head to the pillow.<\/p>\n \u201cHoss, lay down son, please try to rest, you need to sleep now,\u201d ordered a voice that sounded very much like his father\u2019s voice.<\/p>\n \u201cI can\u2019t,\u201d cried Hoss, the tears starting up again.\u00a0 \u201c I need to get up, there is so much to do, please help me get up,\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHoss, please don\u2019t fight it, just relax and close your eyes. Tell you what, I\u2019ll get my guitar and sing to you,\u201d Adam said and Hoss rubbed his eyes, the vision appeared so real, but his mind and body was so tired he could no longer make any sense of anything.<\/p>\n \u201cOne minute I think I\u2019m alone and the next, here they all are, surrounding me like I was the one dying,\u201d thought Hoss.\u00a0 \u201cGod, please just get me though this night and let morning get here soon,\u201d prayed Hoss and closed his eyes again.<\/p>\n When the sun at last came up, Hoss missed the beautiful sunrise.\u00a0 He had been totally exhausted, both physically and mentally.\u00a0 Hop Sing had carried a tray up for him but even the aroma of breakfast had not been enough to lure him from the deep slumber that had finally claimed him.\u00a0 Hop Sing left the tray and returned to his kitchen where he would begin his kitchen chores and when finished with that would go into each of his family\u2019s rooms and tidy them.\u00a0 Soon thought Hop Sing, the time would come to clean out certain things that would no longer be of any use to anyone left in the house.\u00a0 That was a day he did not look forward too but knew that it was something that would have to be done.\u00a0 He would speak to Mister Hoss though before starting, perhaps Mister Hoss would want to help go through the belongings him self.<\/p>\n It was nearly noon before Hoss at last pulled himself from his bed.\u00a0 He couldn\u2019t believe that he had slept as long as he had.\u00a0 He smiled to himself as thoughts turned to Little Joe and thought about the many days that his little brother had wasted on sleeping.\u00a0 Now he would sleep forever and those thoughts saddened his heart.<\/p>\n \u201cOh Joe, do you know how much I loved you?\u201d Hoss asked loudly, knowing that there was no one else present that might hear him and think him crazy.<\/p>\n \u201cYes, Hoss, I know.\u00a0 And I love you too,\u201d came the answer.<\/p>\n \u201cDoggoneit, there goes them voices again,\u201d said Hoss to himself as he quickly glanced around his room.\u00a0 Hoss gave his head a gentle shake and left his room. As he pulled the door closed, he stopped and gave the room the once over, just to check to be sure that it was really empty.\u00a0 Those voices were beginning to wear on his nerves.<\/p>\n As Hoss descended the stairs, his eyes came to rest on his father\u2019s desk and instead of going to the kitchen; Hoss walked to his father\u2019s study.\u00a0 As Hoss pulled the leather chair out, his eyes fell upon Ben\u2019s ledgers and he reached out and opened the one closest to him.\u00a0 Hoss carefully turned to the first page and there he saw in his father\u2019s own handwriting, the columns of figures neatly placed in a roll.\u00a0 The handwriting, some Adam\u2019s as well as his father\u2019s stared back at him.\u00a0 Gently Hoss traced the writings with his fingers.\u00a0 This was all he had left of them, Pa and Adam, a few measly words and numbers, scribbled on paper.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t fair cried his heart, he wanted his family back.\u00a0 Unknown to Hoss tears had pooled in his eyes and glancing down they dripped onto the fine onionskin paper that was contained within the ledger leaving tiny round circles on the work that his father had left unfinished.<\/p>\n Hoss felt like giving up, he had so much to do that the thoughts of all that needed to be done began to overwhelm him.\u00a0 There were the mines to check on, the lumber camp needed supplies and contracts needed signing, there were cattle to round up, calves to brand and the cattle drive was coming soon. Horses were waiting in the corral, they needed breaking, fences needed to be repaired, trees needed marking, the list went on and on and on until Hoss\u2019 head began to ache from the thoughts that plagued it.<\/p>\n \u201cPa, I need ya, I need ya so very bad,\u201d Hoss said as he moved out the door and looked up at the clouds.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m here son, I told you I wouldn\u2019t leave you and have I ever broken a promise to you?\u201d his father answered.<\/p>\n \u201cPa, ya did leave, all of ya left.\u00a0 Don\u2019t ya even know ya dead Pa?\u00a0 You and Adam and Little Joe, ya dun dead and gone.\u00a0 The three of ya left me here by myself,\u201d screamed Hoss to the voice that he had been hearing since coming home.\u00a0 The tears poured from his eyes and his sobs shook his large frame as the heartbroken man covered his face with his hands and cried.<\/p>\n \u201cPa, what\u2019s wrong with him, why is he saying that?\u201d asked Little Joe, concern for his older brother clearly showing on his young face.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m not sure son, his fever seems to have broken.\u00a0 I would have thought that he would be awake by now,\u201d Ben said as he sat on the edge of the bed.\u00a0 Ben placed his hands on those of his middle son\u2019s and gently moved them so that he could see into the face of the weeping man.<\/p>\n \u201cHoss, wake up son.\u00a0 Hoss, do you hear me?\u00a0 Wake up, please,\u201d ordered Ben.<\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t think he can hear you Pa,\u201d Adam stated as he leaned over the bed and watched the expressions on the face of his middle brother.<\/p>\n \u201cTry again Pa.\u00a0 He\u2019s scaring me with all of that talk about us being dead,\u201d Little Joe worried.<\/p>\n Ben moved closer to Hoss and gently shook his shoulders.\u00a0 \u201cHoss, can you hear me?\u201d<\/p>\n Hoss turned his head so that he could hear his father\u2019s voice.\u00a0 Who was shaking him?\u00a0 Carefully he opened his eyes and there smiling at him was his father, or was it another dream?<\/p>\n \u201cPa?\u201d whispered Hoss quietly, causing Ben to lean closer so that he might be able to hear the words.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m here son.\u201d<\/p>\n Hoss reached up and touched the face that seemed so real to him and was surprised to find that the face before him was indeed real.<\/p>\n \u201cPa, it\u2019s really you!\u201d smiled Hoss.<\/p>\n \u201cOf course it is, welcome back son.\u00a0 You certainly gave us a bad scare,\u201d smiled the happy father.<\/p>\n \u201cYa ain\u2019t dead?\u00a0 Adam, Little Joe, ya\u2019s here too!\u201d Hoss grinned at his family.<\/p>\n \u201cThat must have been one hell of a bad dream you had there, Big Brother,\u201d laughed Little Joe, glad to see his brother finally coming around.<\/p>\n \u201cJOSEPH!\u201d yelled Ben.<\/p>\n \u201cSorry Pa,\u201d Little Joe said and smiled slightly at his father.<\/p>\n Hoss looked up at Little Joe and then smiled at all of them.\u00a0 \u201cThat weren\u2019t no dream little brother, that was one nasty nightmare!\u00a0 Now I see why ya wake up screaming when ya have\u2019em.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHey Pa, I\u2019m starved, how about Hop Sing bringing me some grub and then while I eat, I\u2019ll tell ya\u2019ll about this here nightmare I just had?\u201d Hoss suggested.<\/p>\n \u201cWhen are you not hungry?\u201d laughed Adam finding a seat on the other side of Hoss\u2019 large bed.<\/p>\n \u201cAw shucks, Adam, you knows I like ta eat.\u00a0 By the way Adam, Joe, Pa, have I told ya lately that I love ya?\u201d Hoss smiled, his face turning pink at his confession.<\/p>\n He sure was glad that he had his family back and that what he had experienced had not been real, but had only been a nightmare that had been caused by his fever.\u00a0 That fever caused by an injury he received while helping to haul logs down to the river, had raged for days, causing him to see and hear things that were not true to life.<\/p>\n Hoss prayed that he would never again have nightmares, dreams or hallucinations like the one he just experienced.<\/p>\n Looking up at the family that smiled down at him and seeing the love in their faces, Hoss silently prayed a special prayer of thanks for the family that he cherished and loved more than any thing in his life.\u00a0 He was happy to be back in the real world and happier yet to have his family with him.<\/p>\n \u201c Where should I start?\u00a0 Now let\u2019s see\u2026well it all began when\u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026<\/p>\n The End <\/p>\n Tags:<\/strong> Adam Cartwright, Ben Cartwright, Hoss Cartwright, Joe \/ Little Joe Cartwright<\/p>\n
\nOctober 2001<\/b><\/p>\n