{"id":14592,"date":"2017-08-02T06:38:29","date_gmt":"2017-08-02T10:38:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=14592"},"modified":"2025-09-25T15:41:07","modified_gmt":"2025-09-25T19:41:07","slug":"always-by-bluewindfarm","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=14592","title":{"rendered":"Always (by BluewindFarm)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Summary<\/strong>: \u00a0The days and weeks after one of the worst times on the Ponderosa culminates in a moment between father and son. \u00a0What should have happened.<\/span><\/p>\n

Rating: \u00a0G \u00a0(625 words)<\/span><\/p>\n

Author’s Note:\u00a0 <\/strong>Inspired by the August 1, 2017 Pinecone Challenge.<\/span><\/p>\n

Remembering Hoss Series:<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Always<\/a><\/span>
\nAnd I’ve Got Mine… (Until the Pain’s a Cloud of Dust)<\/a><\/span>
\nWhat We Didn’t Choose<\/a><\/span>
\nMomma Liked the Roses<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

From the song, Before you Accuse Me<\/strong>\u00a0by Bo Diddley. \u00a0The prompt: \u00a0Before you accuse me, take a look at yourself.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Always<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBefore you accuse me.\u201d\u00a0 Green eyes glared, teeth gritted, bandaged hands twisted the axe handle as a way\u00a0to control the anger. \u00a0\u2018Take a look at yourself,\u2019<\/em> went unvoiced.<\/span><\/p>\n

Acknowledging the response, and knowing his boy left more unsaid.\u00a0 No, no longer a boy. \u00a0If he accepted the truth, Joseph had become a man long ago; briefly, in his dalliance with Julia Bulette.\u00a0 After her murder, Joe returned home and to being the youngest. He should have stayed a man, but his father and brothers, and Hop Sing to some degree, watched over him to make sure he didn\u2019t succumb to his grief, and thus he became Little Joe once more.<\/span><\/p>\n

The fury of the eyes now standing opposite Ben were reminiscent of the worst storms he\u2019d survived during his years at sea.\u00a0 Funny, he\u2019d never realized the depth of anger they could harbor.<\/span><\/p>\n

He thought their anger was bad when Adam had announced his intention to leave, to fulfill his own dreams, dreams that rivaled the Ponderosa in beauty and longing.\u00a0 The boy\u2019s resentment was\u00a0fleeting.\u00a0 But with the oldest son\u2019s departure, Joe thrust himself into taking on the roles Adam had once managed.\u00a0 And in doing so, his youngest took that final, permanent step into manhood.\u00a0 A life-stage he came to realize had very little to do with age; more so the responsibilities one took on.<\/span><\/p>\n

Life had ebbed and flowed like a river meandering across the land, always seeking out a better destination.<\/span><\/p>\n

But the worst was yet to come — Joe returned home to learn his best friend, his brother had unexpectedly died.\u00a0 This time, anger did not flicker out like a candle in the wind, not even hurricane-force gales could extinguish the burning ire.<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s well of self-pity and loathing after Marie\u2019s death paled in comparison to Joe\u2019s behavior once their guests and their friends had departed following Hoss\u2019 funeral.\u00a0 The unpredictable irritation changed to a\u00a0constant rage, and more often than not, there was no verbal warning; just being in the wrong place at the wrong time or a misspoken word resulted in a punch thrown.\u00a0 Offering a prayer that the recipient had the self-preservation to stay down after the first hit; it was a foolish man who stood and suffered a further barrage of left hooks and right jabs.\u00a0 Nothing he could say would change events while Ben watched the hands learn to give their employer a wide berth.<\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, Joe was their employer.\u00a0 Looking back, Ben realized Marie\u2019s son had managed the running of the Ponderosa for years; having assumed control in such a way that Ben failed to realize he had willingly relinquished his place.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s their Boss, I\u2019m Mr. Cartwright.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

His son standing before him, hands lightly wrapped; a silent testament of their loss to either the side of the barn or maybe a tree. \u00a0He never said.\u00a0 The night before Ben had watched over Dr. Martin’s shoulder as he cleaned and bandaged Joe’s hands. \u00a0Joe’s smile was a good-grace offering at accepting the physician\u2019s chastisement that if his anger continued, he should put it to better use.<\/span><\/p>\n

Guess Paul should have added, after his hands heal.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Overlooking the now dirty dressings, \u201cI\u2019m not accusing you of anything.\u201d Ben approached, hands slipped into his pant pockets, \u201cJust wanted to say your efforts will thrill Hop Sing when he sees\u00a0all the split wood and kindling.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Eyes softened, hands relaxed at hearing the heartfelt words; the first ray of hope that life could go on.\u00a0 Looking at the amount of scattered\u00a0wood, \u201cGuess you could add Jamie too.\u00a0 This was supposed to be his chore after school.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll find him something else to do.\u201d\u00a0 Taking the axe and setting it aside, \u201cTalk with me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

With a hitch in his voice, \u201cI miss him Pa.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Enveloping his son in a tearful hug, \u201cAlways.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

~The END<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Author’s Note: \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0And I’ve Got Mine…<\/em>was the first story written, followed by Momma Liked the Roses<\/em>, and\u00a0What We Didn’t Choose, <\/em>and lastly, Always<\/em>\u00a0in what has become known as my Remembering Hoss Series. \u00a0The Series is listed in chronological order.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Next Story in the Remembering Hoss Series:<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

And I’ve Got Mine… (Until the Pain’s a Cloud of Dust)<\/a><\/span>
\nWhat We Didn’t Choose<\/a><\/span>
\nMomma Liked the Roses<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Tags: Ben Cartwright, Grief, Joe \/ Little Joe Cartwright, JPM<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

<\/path><\/svg><\/i> \"Loading\"<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Summary: \u00a0The days and weeks after one of the worst times on the Ponderosa culminates in a moment between father and son. \u00a0What should have happened.<\/p>\n

Rating: \u00a0G \u00a0(625 words)<\/p>\n

Remembering Hoss Series, links to stories within the series are included.<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

<\/path><\/svg><\/i> \"Loading\"<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":2181,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"template-full-width-post.php","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[23,61,8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-14592","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-drama","category-missing-scene","category-short-stories","wpcat-23-id","wpcat-61-id","wpcat-8-id"],"a3_pvc":{"activated":true,"total_views":2841,"today_views":0},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/hoss.jpeg?fit=188%2C235&ssl=1","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":49897,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=49897","url_meta":{"origin":14592,"position":0},"title":"Hoss’ Meditation (by Katie)","author":"Preserving Their Legacy Author","date":"July 25, 2003","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary:\u00a0 I think we underestimated Hoss Cartwright Rating: G\u00a0 (690 words)","rel":"","context":"In "Hoss Cartwright"","block_context":{"text":"Hoss Cartwright","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=1006"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Preserving-Their-Legacy.png?fit=732%2C477&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Preserving-Their-Legacy.png?fit=732%2C477&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Preserving-Their-Legacy.png?fit=732%2C477&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Preserving-Their-Legacy.png?fit=732%2C477&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":46841,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=46841","url_meta":{"origin":14592,"position":1},"title":"The First Day of Spring (by Adamfan16)","author":"Preserving Their Legacy Author","date":"December 6, 2004","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary:\u00a0This is an expanded Bonanza Bit I did this spring, to the title prompt. 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Rating:\u00a0 R\u00a0 (65,725 words) Due to subject matter contained in this series, the stories are only available via e:mail from the author -- ryjennie@comcast.net","rel":"","context":"In "Action\/Adventure"","block_context":{"text":"Action\/Adventure","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=2"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/09\/4Cs.jpg?fit=400%2C401&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":13202,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=13202","url_meta":{"origin":14592,"position":4},"title":"The Funeral (by silver sven)","author":"silver sven","date":"August 9, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary: \u00a0a missing scene from \u201cForever\u201d Rated: \u00a0K+\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Word count: \u00a0971","rel":"","context":"In "Missing Scene"","block_context":{"text":"Missing Scene","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=61"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/Poker-2016.png?fit=1109%2C750&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/Poker-2016.png?fit=1109%2C750&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/Poker-2016.png?fit=1109%2C750&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/Poker-2016.png?fit=1109%2C750&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/Poker-2016.png?fit=1109%2C750&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":62283,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=62283","url_meta":{"origin":14592,"position":5},"title":"Double Trouble (by JC)","author":"JC","date":"June 15, 2025","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary:\u00a0 A glimpse into the future with grandchildren on the Ponderosa. 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