{"id":15575,"date":"2003-12-04T07:24:40","date_gmt":"2003-12-04T12:24:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=15575"},"modified":"2025-02-27T12:07:35","modified_gmt":"2025-02-27T17:07:35","slug":"fondue-too","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=15575","title":{"rendered":"Fondue Too (by Robin)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Summary:<\/strong>\u00a0 The sequel to Marie, My Fondue.<\/p>\n

Rating:\u00a0 T\u00a0 (935 words)<\/p>\n

Fondue Series:<\/strong><\/p>\n

Marie, My Fondue<\/a>
\nFondue Too<\/a>
\nThe Third Fondue Tale:\u00a0 Heidi<\/a><\/p>\n

Author’s Note:<\/strong> \u00a0The REALLY Losts are satires of the series written with much affection, eye rolling,\u00a0\u00a0and winks. \u00a0And can be somewhat risque’.<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Fondue Too
\n<\/strong>A REALLY LOST EPISODE<\/strong>
\n<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

It was a cold night in West Poe Dunk.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The three Cartwright brothers strode into the busy Greasy Garter Saloon. They had just sold a herd of Plethers and Naugas to the local Laz-e Boy Recliner factory and the boys were kicking back.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThink Pa would mind if we stayed on in this town a few days?\u201d Hoss asked eyeing the Pepperidge Farm Factory Outlet across the street. \u201cThey got a fondue restaurant here in town.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cMy mama made fondue\u2026Pa told me.\u201d Joe offered.<\/p>\n

\u201dThat is right, Little Joe. Marie made fine fondue!\u201d Hoss smiled at the memory.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cBet Pa would be glad we had fun!\u201d Joe said hopefully. \u201cA few days of fun, fondue and sassy saloon women!\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cBet Pa is glad to have the house all to himself\u201d Adam decided. It wasn\u2019t often the single father could have a bit of privacy with his boys away and he could have a bit of privacy with no son pounding on the outhouse door or bleeding on the settee or roaming about in his dirty long johns while Ben was entertaining a lady for a private fondue diner in his HUGE Cattle Baron Boudoir.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The three manly Cartwright brothers sat at a table and a friendly bar maid approached wearing a twinkly dress that looked like it was painted on with metal flake automobile paint.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

“My name is Frisco,” the sexy redhead said to Hoss Cartwright. The sparkles on her dress almost blinded Hoss. It was a good thing he put on his Ray Bans.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

“Frisco?” Hoss said sipping his beer and eyeing the barmaid like she was an over filled tray of Pepperidge Farm Tahoe cookies. His mouth watered and the saliva ran down his chin. Adam handed Hoss a saddle blanket.<\/p>\n

\u201dWipe your chin, Hoss,\u201d Adam said. \u201cYou know how you get a chapped chin when you drool and go out on a cold night.\u201d Adam was so protective of his brothers. Pa would be proud.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

“That is a mighty unusual name, Frisco.” Adam said deciding if he should think with his lips or play poker. Lips were good but if he won a pile of money playing cards, he could count it in the middle of the saloon and hope for an exciting bushwhacking by dawn. His most recent fractured skull had just healed and things were a bit boring in West Poe Dunk. Maybe he could get one of his brothers wrongly accused of a murder and then save them from a lynching.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

“I was named for the place my momma and papa did the happy dance that made me. My sister’s name is East Poe Dunk and my brother is named Pittsburgh.” said sluttish sultry Frisco.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The voluptuous saloon gal leaned close to Joe Cartwright and ran her fingers through his adorable curls “And what do they call you, sweetie pie poopsie boy?” she asked as Joe rested his cheek on her lovely bazoom.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

“You can call me “King Me Cartwright!” Joe purred.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hoss choked on his beer and spit all over Adam’s black shirt. Both brother’s realized that their baby brother found out about “THE SPOT” on the coffee table where Pa and Marie had joined as one after eating fondue…and nine months later, in the little room upstairs Joseph Francis Cartwright was born.<\/p>\n

\u201dWanna have a bit of \u201cDinner\u201d in my upstairs private boudoir? \u201cFrisco sighed twirling Little Joe\u2019s curls and other things.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Joe nodded. WGAGAGAGAGA. \u201cOOOO la la and WOWza Ma\u2019m!\u201d His heart pounded in his chest like a jackhammer. A man less strong than a Cartwright would have died of coronary arrest.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cIs that a HUGE bottle of champagne in your pocket or are you REALLY happy to see me, Cowboy?\u201d Frisco said eying Joe\u2019s cowboy pants.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Joe pulled a HUGE bottle of champagne from his pocket \u201cI learned this from Miss Julia Bullette and Lotta Crabtree!\u201d He uncorked the sparkling wine and poured the saloon gal a glass.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cHope Little brother don\u2019t ask her to play checkers!\u201d Hoss leaned over and whispered to Adam.<\/p>\n

\u201dAnd I hope he doesn\u2019t tell her how much she reminds him of his dead Mama! Nothing kills a romantic interlude like telling a gal she reminds you of your dead mom.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cUnless it is a chapped chin!\u201d Hoss laughed wiping his drool in his sleeve.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cOr an Indian arrow in your arm pit and a husband who can\u2019t shoot!\u201d shouted Lady Beatrice from the next table.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

White Buffalo Woman shouted \u201cOr an Indian plague!\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cOr a pitch fork in your chest!\u201d added Amy Bishop.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cOr being a nun!\u201d added Sister Bertrille Judy Carne \u201cAnd getting killed at the same time!\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe wrapped his arms around the saloon gal. Jor and Frisco headed for her private boudoir and a dinner off OOO la la and WOWza..\u201dDid I ever tell you that you remind me of my dead Mama, REAL Marie? She made swell fondue and played checkers with my Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam slapped his left hand to his forehead in frustration. He kept his right hand clamped on the top of his head for some unknown reason.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cGuess he can\u2019t even wait until he gets up the stairs to tell her about his mom.\u201d Hoss shook his head.<\/p>\n

\u201dGuess that is what Little Joe calls fore play\u201d Adam sighed. \u201cGot to have a talk with that boy!\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYep,\u201d Hoss nodded.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWanna see my eppee, Frisco? \u201c Joe asked as they headed upstairs.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

But, it was too late. Frisco had already died from a bad case of Cartwright fever.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

THE END<\/strong><\/p>\n

Revise 12\/17<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Fondue Series:<\/strong><\/p>\n

The Third Fondue Tale:\u00a0 Heidi<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Summary:\u00a0 The sequel to Marie, My Fondue.<\/p>\n

Rating:\u00a0 T\u00a0 (935 words)<\/p>\n

Fondue Series, links to all the stories within the series are included.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":44,"featured_media":14367,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"template-full-width-post.php","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"Fondue Too","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_members_access_role":[],"_members_access_error":""},"categories":[23,4,8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15575","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-drama","category-humor","category-short-stories","wpcat-23-id","wpcat-4-id","wpcat-8-id"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/06\/ARLE-e1497282889671.png?fit=570%2C416&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15575","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/44"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=15575"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15575\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/14367"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=15575"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=15575"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=15575"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}