Summary:\u00a0 Written for Camp in the Pines, 2018.\u00a0 Sometimes the best show in town is in the courtroom, especially when the Cartwrights are involved.<\/p>\n
Rating: K<\/p>\n
Word Count: 5385 words<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
The Jury-Go-Round<\/strong><\/p>\n Well, hey there!\u00a0 Good to see you again, young\u2019un.\u00a0 Back for another story about the \u201cgood ole days,\u201d are you?\u00a0 Well, I reckon, maybe, I could conjure up another\u2019n, if\u2019n I could just get this tired old brain o\u2019 mine to workin\u2019.\u00a0 Hard on cold days like this, so why don\u2019t you throw another log in the fireplace, son, and I\u2019ll try to come up with somethin\u2019.\u00a0 Now, don\u2019t rush me, boy; just fix that fire and park yourself down on the settle. \u00a0By that time somethin\u2019ll likely come to me.<\/p>\n Ooh, that feels good and warm.\u00a0 You settled now?\u00a0 Okay, here goes:<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Back in them so-called good ole days, law and order weren\u2019t much more\u2019n a joke in Virginia City.\u00a0 Them what was runnin\u2019 the government was more like young\u2019uns, fresh out of their toddler dresses and eager to try on their big boy britches, than growed men with a sense of civic responsibility.\u00a0 Now, you gotta understand this was before we got men like Sheriff Clem to run things or like Roy Coffee before him.\u00a0 You ever meet Sheriff Roy, boy?\u00a0 No?\u00a0 That\u2019s a shame, \u2018cause he sure liked young\u2019uns like you.\u00a0 Gone on to his reward now, but he earned it.\u00a0 Virginia City was raw and rambunctious back when he took over the sheriffin\u2019, but I\u2019m gettin\u2019 ahead of myself.\u00a0 This here story starts before Roy\u2019s time, back when ole Sheriff Howard was in charge . . . if you can call the way he run the place bein\u2019 \u201cin charge\u201d of anything.\u00a0 He was about as much in charge as the feller runnin\u2019 the merry-go-round when the carnival comes to town.<\/p>\n Gotta admit, though, sure was a hoot, watchin\u2019 the first jury that scoundrel put together.\u00a0 It was made up of nothin\u2019 but squint-eyed fellers, picked for that very reason and none other.\u00a0 Drove the lawyers on both sides crazy, just tryin\u2019 to keep that jury\u2019s attention.\u00a0 Most entertainin\u2019 trial I ever done seen!\u00a0 A regular knee slapper.\u00a0 \u2018Course, you gotta understand I wasn\u2019t much more\u2019n a shirt-tail young\u2019un like you back then.\u00a0 I was growed enough to go down the mines, though, so I figured myself a man, even if my shirt tail was flappin\u2019 most of the time.\u00a0 Didn\u2019t fret myself none then about whether justice was being done.\u00a0 Just sat there and enjoyed the show.\u00a0 It was the best one in town and all for free.<\/p>\n So, when the next trial come around, I was chompin\u2019 at the bit to see what the sheriff could do to top that show, and the whole rest of the town was chompin\u2019 right along with me.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t disappoint us.\u00a0 His next jury was made up of the fattest men he could find in town, and once they heard, prospectors come pourin\u2019 in from all the mining camps hereabouts, just to see if\u2019n all them fat fellers could squeeze theirselves into them puny chairs in the jury box.\u00a0 Me, I think the sheriff must\u2019ve scoured the town for the runt-sized things, \u2018cause I don\u2019t remember the squinty-eyed jury squirmin\u2019 and jostlin\u2019 each other half as much.\u00a0 And the accused being a midget made it seem all the funnier to have the jury made up of such oversized men.\u00a0 Could\u2019ve howled my head off at the sight if I hadn\u2019t taken a gander around the room and seen ole Ben Cartwright\u2019s face.<\/p>\n If he\u2019d belched fire, it wouldn\u2019ta surprised me none, red-faced and fumin\u2019 like he was.\u00a0 And I reckon he had cause.\u00a0 You see, the last man squeezin\u2019 his hiney into one of them skimpy jury seats weren\u2019t none other than Ben\u2019s middle boy, Hoss.\u00a0 Yes, sir, the trial was a whole heap funnier before Hoss\u2019s Pa got mad, but on t\u2019other hand, it had just got a whole heap more promisin\u2019, too.\u00a0 Anything that involved the Cartwrights was, but when one of \u2018em was spittin\u2019 mad and ready to rassle, well, that was a show worth seein\u2019, any day.\u00a0 I reckoned not one of us would be goin\u2019 home disappointed!<\/p>\n Didn\u2019t much like seein\u2019 Hoss uncomfortable, though.\u00a0 He\u2019d always treated me right kindly.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t really belong on that jury, nohow, on account of he wasn\u2019t fat like them others.\u00a0 He was big, all right, one of the biggest fellers in town, and he probably carried a mite more flesh on his bones than he needed, but it was mostly rock-solid muscle.\u00a0 Hoss was one of the strongest men around, and there come a day, years later, when I had reason to be glad of it.\u00a0 If it hadn\u2019ta been for his strong back, I reckon I\u2019d still be buried in the collapse of the Gould and Curry, but that\u2019s another story.<\/p>\n Gettin\u2019 back to this one, the whole room was rockin\u2019 with laughter at the expense o\u2019 them fat fellers sittin\u2019 in judgment on the midget, and ole Judge Kent had to bang his gavel for nigh on to five minutes before they settled down.\u00a0 Well, I didn\u2019t actually time it, on account of I didn\u2019t own a watch back then, but it seemed at least that long.\u00a0 Givin\u2019 that gavel one more, loud smack, the judge raised his voice, \u2018cause folks was still snickerin\u2019, just not as loud, and he asked the prosecutor and the defense lawyer if\u2019n they was satisfied with the jury.\u00a0 Guess they figured sayin\u2019 otherwise wouldn\u2019t do \u2018em a lick o\u2019 good, \u2018cause they both said they was.<\/p>\n That was when Hoss Cartwright stood up behind the jury\u2019s rail and called out, \u201cYour Honor!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cSit down, boy,\u201d ordered the judge.\u00a0 \u201cWe got to get started here.\u201d<\/p>\n Bein\u2019 the kind to do as he was told, Hoss sat down\u2014well, perched\u2014on the edge of that skimpy chair, but he tried again to get the judge\u2019s attention.\u00a0 \u201cYour Honor,\u201d he said.\u00a0 \u201cI ain\u2019t so sure I ought t\u2019be on this jury.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWhat\u2019s the matter?\u201d \u00a0Judge Kent snorted.\u00a0 \u201cDon\u2019t you think you\u2019re big enough for the job?\u201d<\/p>\n That set the room cacklin\u2019 again and brought Hoss\u2019s Pa to his feet.\u00a0 \u201cYour Honor,\u201d he protested, all indignant.\u00a0 \u201cThis is no laughing matter.\u00a0 A man\u2019s life, or at least his liberty, is at stake!\u201d<\/p>\n The gavel banged again, and then the judge waved it at Mr. Cartwright.\u00a0 \u201cYou sit yourself down, Mr. High-and-Mighty Cartwright, or I\u2019ll find you in contempt.\u201d\u00a0 Ole Ben sat, but smoke was comin\u2019 out both ears, so to speak.\u00a0 He tried to keep talkin\u2019, but Judge Kent just gaveled him down again.<\/p>\n \u201cYour Honor,\u201d Hoss said, tryin\u2019 once more, which made him a whole heap braver man than me.\u00a0 \u201cYou don\u2019t understand.\u00a0 I know the defendant.\u00a0 We\u2019s good friends, and it don\u2019t hardly seem right for me to sit in judgment on \u2018im.\u201d<\/p>\n That\u2019s when I realized that midget was one of them leprechauns what Hoss had brought into town some time before.\u00a0 I should\u2019ve remembered that right off, but he looked different without his green suit, and, well, after that prime speech Hoss gave about \u2018em once, most of us here in town had quit thinkin\u2019 of the little fellers like they still belonged in a circus.\u00a0 They had Hoss to thank for that, so he was tellin\u2019 the pure truth about bein\u2019 a friend to the little man on trial.<\/p>\n \u201cYou sayin\u2019 you can\u2019t be fair?\u201d the judge demanded.\u00a0 \u201cYou tellin\u2019 me, boy, that even if the evidence proves this man guilty as sin, you\u2019ll find him innocent, just out of friendship?\u00a0 I\u2019d\u2019ve thought as almighty righteous a man as your pa would\u2019ve raised you better\u2019n that.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYes, sir, he did; \u2018course, he did,\u201d Hoss said right away, though his eyes still looked fretful, \u201cand I\u2019ll sure do my best to be fair, but . . .\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cGood enough, then,\u201d Judge Kent said, waving his hand like he was brushin\u2019 away a pesky fly.\u00a0 \u201cNow, quit your bellyachin\u2019 and listen to the evidence.\u00a0 You ready to start, Mr. Atkins?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI am, your Honor,\u201d the prosecutor said, and standing up, he started right in, paintin\u2019 that poor little midget guilty as sin, just like the judge had said.<\/p>\n The case was about the robbery of a store, and the thief had gone in through a window so small no full-size man could\u2019ve made it.\u00a0 Now, there was a few of them leprechauns still around, so could\u2019ve been any one of \u2018em, but this here one couldn\u2019t account for his whereabouts at the time of the crime.\u00a0 The prosecutor had some other reasons for thinkin\u2019 the midget done it, but I can\u2019t quite recollect \u2018em after all these years.\u00a0 Anyways, what mattered most was what a slick talker that lawyer was, way slicker than the one defendin\u2019 the midget, so \u2018most everyone in that courtroom was convinced he was guilty, me among \u2018em, I\u2019m sorry to say.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t quite noon when they finished up, so I decided to stick around until the jury came back with the verdict.\u00a0 I figured it couldn\u2019t take long.\u00a0 Open and shut, like they say.<\/p>\n Only it wasn\u2019t, at least in someone\u2019s mind, \u2018cause I waited and waited and waited some more, and my stomach commenced to growlin\u2019 somethin\u2019 fierce.\u00a0 Didn\u2019t help when I saw Ben\u2019s youngest come back into the room, carryin\u2019 a bag of sandwiches.\u00a0 I guess his pa had sent him out for lunch for the family, \u2018cause they were stickin\u2019 close, too.\u00a0 The Cartwright family always was like that, stickin\u2019 by one another when any one of \u2018em was facin\u2019 somethin\u2019 hard.\u00a0 I must\u2019ve been slobberin\u2019 after them sandwiches with my eyes, \u2018cause Little Joe\u2014that was the boy\u2019s name\u2014trotted over\u2014he took everything at a trot back then\u2014and gave me half of his.\u00a0 I shouldn\u2019ta taken it.\u00a0 Skinny as that kid was\u2014about half the size of his big brother Hoss\u2014he needed every bite hisself, but he said he\u2019d had enough, and I was half-starved, so I took it and bit right in.<\/p>\n Little Joe sat down next to me, friendly-like, so I just asked him straight out if\u2019n he thought his big brother was holdin\u2019 up a guilty verdict out of friendship for the midget.<\/p>\n \u201cNo!\u201d the boy declared, flarin\u2019 up so quick I naturally held that sandwich out of his reach, for fear he\u2019d snatch it back.\u00a0 \u201cHoss is the fairest, most honest man you\u2019ll ever see, so if he\u2019s fightin\u2019 for a not-guilty verdict, it\u2019s \u2018cause he believes the man is not guilty.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYou think the little man is innocent?\u201d I asked.<\/p>\n Little Joe settled down, quick as he\u2019d flared up.\u00a0 \u201cYeah,\u201d he said, \u201cbut in my case it is just \u2018cause I know him and don\u2019t see how he could do such a thing.\u00a0 Good thing I\u2019m not on the jury, huh?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYeah.\u00a0 Reckon it\u2019s a good thing I ain\u2019t, either,\u201d I admitted.\u00a0 \u201cThem lawyer fellers talk so slick, I can\u2019t think straight.\u00a0 \u2018Course, since I ain\u2019t squint-eyed, nor fat, neither, ain\u2019t likely I\u2019ll end up on a jury.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHoss ain\u2019t fat,\u201d Little Joe snapped, face gettin\u2019 all red again fast.\u00a0 You gotta understand.\u00a0 Them two youngest Cartwright boys was tight, practically joined at the hip, like they say.\u00a0 All the time I knew him, the quickest way to get under Little Joe\u2019s skin was to say somethin\u2019 agin his big brother Hoss.\u00a0 I wasn\u2019t here then, but I heard it was the same in the schoolyard and that there was some what would make hurtful comments about Hoss just to see the little feller double up his puny fists and come flyin\u2019 at \u2018em.\u00a0 Tickled \u2018em, same as Sheriff Howard\u2019s juries did Virginia City.\u00a0 \u2018Course, Hoss wasn\u2019t about to let his baby brother get the worst of it, so he had to step in, and once he showed \u2018em his ham-sized fists, weren\u2019t many that stuck around long!\u00a0 Little brother mighta come to his senses a whole heap sooner if\u2019n big brother hadn\u2019t been so quick to come to his rescue, but I reckon that ain\u2019t for me to say.\u00a0 Anyways, we\u2019ll never know \u2018cause Hoss always did.<\/p>\n So, I was quick to agree with Joe that Hoss weren\u2019t fat, on account of it was true, like I already said, not to mention that boy had a reputation for bein\u2019 quick-tempered and quick on the draw to boot.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t want to cross him; besides, I plain liked him, us bein\u2019 close of an age and all and him bein\u2019 so generous with his grub.\u00a0 Got to know him right well over the next day or so, \u2018cause that\u2019s how long it took that jury to come together on a verdict, and he was good enough to bring me a sandwich of my own whenever he got one, and he\u2019d sit and munch and jaw along with me.<\/p>\n You might wonder why I stuck around that courtroom after the first day, but truth is, I didn\u2019t have nothin\u2019 better to do.\u00a0 I worked the night shift at the mines, and I was young, so it didn\u2019t bother me none to burn the candle at both ends.\u00a0 A man can\u2019t sleep his life plumb away, after all, but there weren\u2019t that much to do, neither.\u00a0 Sittin\u2019 around, jawing with Joe over a free sandwich was as good a way as any to pass the time \u2018til my next shift, so we was both there when the verdict come in.<\/p>\n I found out later, from gossip around town, that it sure \u2018nough was Hoss who\u2019d held out against the other eleven men until they saw it his way and, one by one, changed their votes to not guilty.\u00a0 Seems like he\u2019d argued that just \u2018cause a man coulda done a crime and couldn\u2019t prove he hadn\u2019t didn\u2019t mean he was the one what done it.\u00a0 Made sense to me.\u00a0 We found out, much later, that it was actually a young boy, forced by his pa to help with the break-in, who\u2019d gone through that window, and that just made us think all the higher of Hoss for standin\u2019 up for the midget like he had, friend or no friend.<\/p>\n I ain\u2019t so sure Judge Kent felt the same, \u2018cause at the time he sure grumbled about havin\u2019 to stay over in Virginia City while that jury piddled around, the way he put it.\u00a0 Heard him mumble once that he shoulda took Hoss up on his offer to step down.\u00a0 Sheriff Howard, on t\u2019other hand, seemed to think it made for a better show and kept folks in town, makin\u2019 it good for business.\u00a0 Anyway, he didn\u2019t seem the least bit perturbed about havin\u2019 put a stubborn Cartwright\u2014they don\u2019t come no other way\u2014on the jury, \u2018cause next trial that come around, lo and behold, if\u2019n he didn\u2019t slap another one in the box.<\/p>\n This time it was Adam, Ben Cartwright\u2019s oldest boy, that was put on a jury of the tallest, skinniest fellers in town.\u00a0 Not that that described Adam, any better than fat did Hoss.\u00a0 Oh, he was tall enough, which must be what got him there, but he wasn\u2019t rail-thin and spindly like most of them others in the box.\u00a0 No, sir, Adam was well muscled, a fine figure of a man.\u00a0 Frankly, his baby brother Joe woulda matched them other jurors better\u2014well, not in bein\u2019 tall, \u2018cause he wasn\u2019t, but in t\u2019other way.\u00a0 He filled out later on, but in them days that kid was plumb scrawny, even more\u2019n me, and I weren\u2019t more\u2019n a wisp in the wind back then.\u00a0 Reckon that\u2019d make Little Joe about half a wisp.\u00a0 Ooh!\u00a0 Ouch!\u00a0 Gotta remember not to slap these bony knees like that nor to laugh at my own jokes so hard, neither.\u00a0 I ain\u2019t as young as I used to be.<\/p>\n Well, Sheriff Howard probably had him a knee-slappin\u2019 fit when that jury took their seats, \u2018cause he\u2019d switched out the chairs again, so\u2019s to make \u2018em look as ridiculous as he could.\u00a0 He\u2019d put twelve of the shortest chairs I ever seen behind the rail for them tall men.\u00a0 Might be why he picked Adam Cartwright to sit in one, \u2018stead of his baby brother, if\u2019n he was wantin\u2019 a Cartwright, \u2018cause Little Joe woulda fit fine.\u00a0 Adam\u2019s knees, on t\u2019other hand, was bent clean up to his chest, but he took that seat regal-like as a king on his throne.<\/p>\n He weren\u2019t bent up as much as Henry Blasdel, though, him hittin\u2019 the clouds at a whoppin\u2019 six feet, five inches.\u00a0 Now, I know you\u2019ve heard that name, boy!\u00a0 It\u2019s in all the history books, I reckon.\u00a0 That\u2019s right, our state\u2019s very first governor hisself; he was on that jury, right alongside Adam.\u00a0 I sort of think, though no one\u2019s ever told me this for true, that the Cartwrights\u2019 connections with the governors of Nevada got its start right on that jury, \u2018cause you could tell, just by lookin\u2019 at \u2018em, that Henry Blasdel and Adam Cartwright was two peas in a pod when it come to sortin\u2019 out the truth.<\/p>\n Folks used to say Adam was high-and-mighty.\u00a0 Well, they said it about all the Cartwrights, \u2018ceptin\u2019, maybe, Hoss, who was always as down-to-earth as they come, but they said it most about Adam.\u00a0 Him bein\u2019 college-educated\u2014back East, no less!\u2014 was part of it, but it was mostly the way he carried hisself, calm and collected, like he was above it all, if\u2019n you take my meanin\u2019.\u00a0 Like how he could just walk away from a gunfight, instead of drawin\u2019 leather for no reason but pure pride.\u00a0 Now, that takes grit, boy, to turn your back on some feller tryin\u2019 to egg you into gunplay.\u00a0 You remember that, you hear me?\u00a0 Courage ain\u2019t all bark and bluster; sometimes it\u2019s quiet control, like Adam showed many a time.\u00a0 That\u2019s how he handled this jury silliness, too, like he didn\u2019t even notice.\u00a0 He was there to see justice done, and he\u2019d see \u2018er done, by crackies!<\/p>\n Hoss, who\u2019d been through it hisself, frowned at seein\u2019 his big brother made the butt of the sheriff\u2019s joke, but Little Joe, ornery as he was in them days, couldn\u2019t resist gigglin\u2019 a mite.\u00a0 That kid was a born prankster hisself, and he sure loved a good laugh, at his own expense as much as any other\u2019s.\u00a0 Him and Adam, though, was just natural sparrin\u2019 partners, so I reckon it tickled him to see his sober-sided big brother, who he really thought the world of, lookin\u2019 a smidge nonsensical.<\/p>\n That was before Adam\u2019s Pa got mad, though, and lit into the sheriff.\u00a0 Oh, no, boy!\u00a0 I don\u2019t mean he hauled off and hit him.\u00a0 That weren\u2019t Ben\u2019s way, not agin the law.\u00a0 No, I meant he lit into him with words; iron-spiked words they was, flyin\u2019 fast and hard.\u00a0 Didn\u2019t make a bit o\u2019 difference, though.\u00a0 Sheriff Howard just kept on grinnin\u2019 at him \u2018til he run out of breath, and when ole Ben finally stopped, he asked, \u201cWhat\u2019s the matter, Cartwright?\u00a0 You afeared your boy ain\u2019t up to it?\u201d\u00a0 From the way he leaned on that word, \u201cup,\u201d it was plainer\u2019n the nose on my face that he was mockin\u2019 Adam\u2019s height.\u00a0 Them sittin\u2019 near enough to hear broke out laughin\u2019\u2014well, with one exception.\u00a0 I was close enough to hear, obviously, or I couldn\u2019t be tellin\u2019 you this tale, but I was beginnin\u2019 to see things through Cartwright\u2019s eyes\u2014and I don\u2019t mean the youngest one, neither.\u00a0 He\u2019d quit giggling, but I could still see a twinkle in his eyes and a smile twitchin\u2019 at his mouth.\u00a0 Good thing his pa had his eyes set on the sheriff or that boy likely wouldn\u2019ta sat easy for a month of Sundays.\u00a0 I give \u2018im a wink, to let \u2018im know I knew what he was feelin\u2019 and he give me one back.\u00a0 Me and Little Joe got sort of chummy over the course of them trials, and it\u2019s a friendship I prize to this day.<\/p>\n Judge Kent come in from his chambers, and when he got a look at who was sittin\u2019 in that jury box, I thought he might have hisself an attack of apoplexy.\u00a0 At first, I thought it was because he\u2019d had enough of the sheriff\u2019s foolishness, but I soon learned what was really botherin\u2019 him.\u00a0 \u201cMr. Cartwright,\u201d he said, addressin\u2019 Adam, \u201cdo you by any chance know this defendant?\u00a0 He a friend of yours?\u201d\u00a0 Apparently, he didn\u2019t want another trial-draggin\u2019 Cartwright on his jury if\u2019n there was a way to get him off.\u00a0 I know folks say Kent was as crooked as a dog with his hind leg broke, and I reckon he was, but all that come later.\u00a0 In the early days, which this was, I figure he was just lazy and didn\u2019t give a hoot what happened in his court, so long as it didn\u2019t put him out none.<\/p>\n Adam lifted his eyebrow in that lofty way he had and said, calm as the world, \u201cWhy, no, your Honor.\u00a0 To the best of my knowledge, we\u2019ve never met.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHuh!\u201d \u00a0The judge snorted, lookin\u2019 put out already, but I guess he couldn\u2019t think of nothin\u2019 else to ask, \u2018cause he just grunted and told the prosecutor to get started.<\/p>\n Judge Kent may not have wanted a Cartwright on his jury, but the longer that trial went on, the gladder I was that we had one.\u00a0 The way Hoss had handled hisself had made a mighty big impression on me, and gettin\u2019 to know Little Joe had, too, so I knew I could trust Adam to do what was right, and we sure needed men like him\u2014and Henry Blasdel, too\u2014on that jury, \u2018cause that case was a hard one.<\/p>\n Not only was the defendant accused of cold-blooded murder, but he was knowed to be friends with none less than Farmer Perkins.\u00a0 They probably don\u2019t teach young\u2019uns like you about the likes of him in school, but he was a pure terror to Virginia City back then, and any man who voted to convict a friend of his had every right to fear for his life.\u00a0 You could see in the faces of most of those jurors that they were already quakin\u2019 in their boots, but if Adam or Blasdel was, it sure didn\u2019t show.\u00a0 Now, I was real easy to sway back in those days, and on Hoss\u2019s case the slick-talkin\u2019 lawyers had pulled me back and forth betwixt \u2018em, but this time there wasn\u2019t a lick of doubt the man was guilty.\u00a0 The only question was whether the jury would have the courage to find \u2018im so.\u00a0 I figured the best we could hope for was a hung jury, probably one that had voted 10 to 2 to let the man go free.<\/p>\n One thing I\u2019ve learned over the years, though, is that courage can be catchin\u2019, same as fear, and I reckon that\u2019s what musta happened in that jury room.\u00a0 Those twelve men stayed in there for days.\u00a0 Can\u2019t remember exactly how long, but days longer than any jury before \u2018em.\u00a0 Little Joe\u2019d quit his grinnin\u2019 by then, and I could tell he was worried about his big brother.\u00a0 Musta heard some of the rumors goin\u2019 around about what would happen to them jurors, if\u2019n they didn\u2019t straighten out and vote the man free.\u00a0 Can\u2019t say for sure if\u2019n the rumors reached into the jury room itself, but I had a feeling they had and that that was what was keepin\u2019 \u2018em in there, the one place in town they figured they was safe.<\/p>\n Judge Kent was sure \u2018nough put out by the time they filed back in with their verdict.\u00a0 It was Adam Cartwright who stood up to deliver it.\u00a0 Good thing, too, \u2018cause he still looked as cool and calm as the day he first took that chair with the sawed-off legs, whilst some of the others was shakin\u2019, just sittin\u2019 there silent.\u00a0 Reckon, maybe, they was prayin\u2019 to the Maker they figured to be meetin\u2019 soon.\u00a0 A man needs to feel prayed-up at a time like that.\u00a0 Don\u2019t know if Adam was prayed-up or not\u2014never thought to ask his baby brother\u2014but he looked it, anyhow, when he read out the verdict of guilty, as charged.<\/p>\n A hush fell over the room, like they say in some of them sorry dime novels you\u2019re so fond of, boy, and Judge Kent looked sober as\u2014well, as a judge, I reckon\u2014when he asked, \u201cYou sure about that, son?\u201d\u00a0 Now, I don\u2019t know whether he\u2019d developed a sudden concern for those jurors or whether he was afeared Farmer Perkins would lump him in with them when it came to passin\u2019 out retribution or if, maybe, I was wrong and he really was a crooked judge back as early as that and actually wanted that killer to go free.<\/p>\n Either way, it was Adam that stood tallest to me, even in a jury full of sky-scrapin\u2019 men, when he said, solemn and sincere, \u201cWe all are, your Honor.\u201d\u00a0 I think he might\u2019ve been gildin\u2019 the lily a mite, \u2018cause I know for a fact a couple of them jurors was so sure of their verdict that they hightailed it out of town before their next meal.\u00a0 At the time I figured they was the smart ones.\u00a0 I reckon the others knew what was likely headed their way, \u2018cause they walked soft, lookin\u2019 behind at every step for the next little bit.<\/p>\n Wasn\u2019t too long after the hangin\u2019 before the first juror took a bullet, but the man that shot him paid for it fast, too, on account of Ben Cartwright had his boys and a bunch of his men keepin\u2019 watch over each one of those jurors.\u00a0 It was only a flesh wound, thank the good Lord, but we lost another man or two over the mountain.\u00a0 The ones that stayed, though, reached down into their souls and found they had more grit in \u2018em than they\u2019d knowed was there, and none of the rest of \u2018em ever took a bullet.<\/p>\n Way I heard it later was that Sam Bryant, big boss man around here for a while, told the Farmer to back off, that they\u2019d get their revenge later.\u00a0 Must not a-been ready to show his hand just yet, but by the time he did, he near about had his grip so tight on Virginia City that the life was squeezed out of it.\u00a0 Adam Cartwright played a big part in unsqueezin\u2019 it, but that\u2019s another story, and it\u2019s high time I finished up this one.<\/p>\n Word was that Sheriff Howard was plannin\u2019 another special jury for the next big trial.\u00a0 Supposedly, this one would be made up of the handsomest men in town.\u00a0 Well, now, what man wouldn\u2019t want to get picked for that jury!\u00a0 (So long as it was a nice, easy case, you understand, with no friends like the Farmer lurkin\u2019 about.)\u00a0 With a mug like this, I knew I didn\u2019t have a prayer of landin\u2019 in the jury box, but there was considerable speculation on who might.\u00a0 Most folks agreed Little Joe Cartwright was certain-sure to get chose.\u00a0 I mean, if you\u2019d asked any woman in the territory to pick out twelve good-lookin\u2019 men, I guarantee that boy, plumb purty as he was, woulda been near the top of the list.\u00a0 His brother Adam would, too, but bein\u2019 as he\u2019d just served on a jury, it weren\u2019t likely he\u2019d get asked to serve again so soon, \u2018less\u2019n the sheriff really wanted to rile Judge Kent.\u00a0 Ben Cartwright hisself cut a fine figure for an older feller, but that probably woulda bought the sheriff more trouble than he could handle.<\/p>\n Well, sir, Little Joe commenced to struttin\u2019 around town like a dadgummed peacock, grinnin\u2019 and winkin\u2019 at every skirt he passed, like he was purely enjoyin\u2019 all the attention.\u00a0 I figured it\u2019d be hard to find a seat in that courtroom with all the ladies fightin\u2019 to get in.\u00a0 But that was before Joe\u2019s pa got mad.\u00a0 And I do mean good and mad, \u2018cause as much as Ben took on about his other boys, he could be plumb foolish when it come to his youngest.\u00a0 Well, they all could, for that matter; Hoss and Adam was just as protective of Ben\u2019s baby boy as their pa, and not one of \u2018em thought it\u2019d be a good idea to let that young\u2019un preen his peacock feathers in a jury box.<\/p>\n Ben was determined to put a stop to the sheriff makin\u2019 the courtroom his own personal play yard, once and for all, and he finally found the right way to go about it.\u00a0 Talkin\u2019 to the judge hadn\u2019t done no good; hollerin\u2019 at the sheriff hadn\u2019t, neither, so Ben went where the real power in town was.\u00a0 He went to the women\u2014not the young ones, who was all for seein\u2019 purty boys like Little Joe strut their stuff.\u00a0 No, sir, Ben went to the mothers, appealed to \u2018em as parents to help him shut down this nonsense and make Virginia City a fittin\u2019 place to raise their young\u2019uns, and that done it.\u00a0 You might as well learn this early, boy: ain\u2019t no stoppin\u2019 a lady with a bee in her bonnet, and as for a whole town full of \u2018em . . . well, I reckon you get my drift.<\/p>\n Say, it\u2019s gettin\u2019 on toward suppertime.\u00a0 You best start for home, or your mama\u2019ll have my hide.\u00a0 What\u2019s that?\u00a0 She said to ask me home to supper?\u00a0 Well, help me up, then, young\u2019un, \u2018cause I ain\u2019t about to turn down an invite like that!\u00a0 Ain\u2019t nobody makes chicken \u2018n\u2019 dumplings like your ma, and if there should happen to be apple pie for dessert, I could probably be persuaded to fetch another story out o\u2019 my bag before bedtime.<\/p>\n What\u2019d you say?\u00a0 Bless you, boy, no!\u00a0 That ain\u2019t Ben Cartwright livin\u2019 out to the Ponderosa these days.\u00a0 Ole Ben passed on a good while past.\u00a0 Hoss, too, much before his time.\u00a0 Can\u2019t you guess who that feller with the curly white mane halfway to his shoulders is?\u00a0 No?\u00a0 Well, that\u2019s Joe!\u00a0 He always did avoid a trip to the barber longer than any feller I ever saw, and now there ain\u2019t no one to make \u2018im cut off a single curl, \u2018less\u2019n he wants to.\u00a0 Adam might, if\u2019n he was still around, but after Ben\u2019s oldest finally come to his senses and hightailed it back from the east coast, he settled over the mountains in Oakland, same as his old jury mate, Henry Blasdel, once he was through bein\u2019 governor.\u00a0 Better opportunities for an architect there, Joe told me once.\u00a0 Him and Adam get together now and again, though, them and their families, and the way I hear it, that passel of grandkids they got just sits around, starin\u2019 wide-eyed when they start swappin\u2019 stories, \u2018cause both of \u2018em spin yarns better\u2019n me, even if my name is Caleb T. Spinmeister.\u00a0 Maybe I\u2019ll take you out there sometime and let you hear one, straight from the horse\u2019s mouth, so to speak.\u00a0 Well, get the hitch outa your gidalong, boy!\u00a0 There\u2019s chicken \u2018n\u2019 dumplin\u2019s waitin\u2019!<\/p>\n <\/p>\n The End<\/p>\n \u00a9 April, 2018<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Notes\u00a0 ~ ~ ~ ~<\/p>\n <\/p>\n The 4 Ws to be used in this story were:<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Okay, so what\u2019s history and what\u2019s just story?\u00a0 Here\u2019s the facts:<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Sheriff Howard actually existed, and he really did have a penchant for picking peculiar juries.\u00a0 The ones described here accurately detail their makeup in the correct order; however, the added silliness with the chairs is invented.\u00a0 While we don\u2019t know who put a stop to the madness, it did end just as the sheriff was contemplating a jury of handsome men, which any Cartwright might have graced.\u00a0 Henry Goode Blasdel did sit on the third jury of tall, skinny men.\u00a0 At 6 feet, 5 inches tall, he was a natural choice, and as stated, he went on to become the state of Nevada\u2019s first governor in 1864, serving until 1871, after which he moved to Oakland, California.\u00a0 Judge Kent is purely fictitious, as are the legal cases presented here.\u00a0 And, as we all know, the Cartwrights are real!<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Tags:\u00a0 Adam Cartwright, Ben Cartwright, Hoss Cartwright, Joe \/ Little Joe Cartwright<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Summary:\u00a0 Written for Camp in the Pines, 2018.\u00a0 Sometimes the best show in town is in the courtroom, especially when the Cartwrights are involved.<\/p>\n Rating: K Word Count: 5385 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":48,"featured_media":16838,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"template-full-width-post.php","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_members_access_role":[],"_members_access_error":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[120],"class_list":["post-16834","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humor","tag-citp","wpcat-4-id"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/Jurybox3.jpg?fit=700%2C531&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16834","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/48"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=16834"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16834\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/16838"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=16834"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=16834"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=16834"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}\n