{"id":2537,"date":"2005-09-01T23:44:06","date_gmt":"2005-09-02T03:44:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=2537"},"modified":"2026-07-29T13:47:26","modified_gmt":"2026-07-29T17:47:26","slug":"conquering-the-stillness-within-part-1","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=2537","title":{"rendered":"Conquering the Stillness Within – Part 1 (by Kenda)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Summary: \u00a0<\/span>“Conquering the Stillness Within” is an alternate universe story to the 12th season aired episode “The Stillness Within.” Or maybe better put a, What if it would have happened like this. . . story. Although the character of Jamie Hunter appeared in “The Stillness Within,” he doesn’t appear in “Conquering.” Candy, who did not appear in “The Stillness Within,” is included in this fan fiction story.<\/span><\/p>\n

Rated:<\/span>\u00a0K+ (49,455 words)<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Conquering the Stillness Within Series:<\/strong><\/p>\n

Part 1<\/a>
\nPart 2<\/a>
\nPart 3<\/a><\/p>\n

Conquering the Stillness Within<\/strong><\/p>\n

<\/div>\n
\n

* Four lines of dialogue taking place between Ben and Hoss appear in italics in Chapter 1. This dialogue is from \u201cThe Stillness Within.\u201d<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

*This is part 1 of a 3 part posting.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Prologue<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Adam read the letter<\/strong> for the third time since arriving home. When he finished the last line \u2013 Love, Pa \u2013 he leaned the back of his head against the soft velvet of the settee, and stared at the ceiling. With slow, gentle strokes, Adam absently ran his hand over the German Shepherd sitting regally at his feet.<\/span><\/p>\n

The man smiled a little as the word \u201cPa\u201d ran through his mind. It was a term he rarely heard here in Boston. \u201cPapa\u201d or \u201cFather\u201d were the common forms of address for one\u2019s paternal parent; \u201cDa\u201d the chosen form of the Irish immigrants. But to Adam Cartwright, his father would forever be Pa. That simple one syllable word still conjured up warm feelings of comfort and safety. Feelings forty-two year old Adam hadn\u2019t allowed himself to indulge in for several years now. For many reasons, it wouldn\u2019t do to grow homesick. Not the least of which was that, from the day Adam left Nevada, he\u2019d never intended to return.<\/span><\/p>\n

But this time it was Adam who Ben Cartwright was seeking comfort from. Or if nothing else, answers. Though his father hadn\u2019t expressed sorrow in the letter, Adam sensed it just as clearly as if he were standing next to Pa in the big great room of the Ponderosa ranch house. Worry, now that was easy to discern, because it was the one emotion Pa openly spoke of. Adam had that paragraph memorized, and could hear the tone and cadence of Pa\u2019s voice each time he read it.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m worried about him, Adam. I don\u2019t know what else I can do to help him. He can\u2019t face what\u2019s happened. He won\u2019t accept it. He continues to deny that it\u2019s permanent. He continues to deny that it\u2019s doubtful he\u2019ll ever see again.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

It was the light scent of perfume that first announced her arrival. Adam was so preoccupied by his father\u2019s letter, that he hadn\u2019t heard her walking through the dining room, or crossing the foyer. But then, all of his senses had sharpened since he\u2019d taken the position at the institute. He no longer relied only on his hearing or eyesight for his brain to register someone\u2019s presence.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

He lifted his head and smiled. He held out his left arm, and used his voice to guide her.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThere you are. It\u2019s past time the most beautiful woman in Boston comes to the parlor to spend the evening with me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Without being told to, the dog got up and moved to lie beside the brick hearth of the fireplace so the woman wouldn\u2019t trip over him.<\/span><\/p>\n

She felt along the edge of the settee, her sightless eyes fixed on the portrait of Abel Stoddard that hung over the mantel. She settled next to Adam, her smile soft and gentle, just like the voice he\u2019d fallen in love with the first time he\u2019d heard it.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMrs. O\u2019Connell needed help with the dishes.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMrs. O\u2019Connell is paid to do the dishes. You don\u2019t need to help her.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, that\u2019s a terrible thing to say.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy is it so terrible? She worked for my grandfather for twenty years, and now she works for me. She never seems to need help doing anything until you arrive. Then she holds you hostage in the kitchen, while leaving me alone to pine for you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The young woman chuckled. \u201cAmongst the many things that can be said in praise of Bridget O\u2019Connell \u2013 she keeps a tidy house, and is a better chaperone than any father in Boston.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat she is,\u201d Adam said, while placing a kiss on Laddie\u2019s cheek. \u201cI wish she\u2019d keep in mind, however, that you\u2019re several years beyond the age where a chaperone is necessary, and I\u2019m well beyond it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

As though she\u2019d been listening from the dining room, which she probably had been, Bridget O\u2019Connell\u2019s pudgy form suddenly appeared. She wagged a stubby finger in Adam\u2019s direction, and with a heavy Irish brogue imparted, \u201cNo woman who\u2019s not betrothed is ever past the age of needin\u2019 a chaperon if she fancies her reputation, and don\u2019t yeh be fergettin\u2019 that, Adam Cartwright.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam mumbled under his breath, \u201cNow I know why I miss Hop Sing on some days,\u201d though to humor his housekeeper, he smiled and acknowledged, \u201cYes, Ma\u2019am.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Brockington\u2019s driver is outside with the carriage, waitin\u2019 to take the missy home, he is.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThank you,\u201d Adam said, then said it again, and then was forced to say it a third time.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI said thank you, Mrs. O\u2019Connell,\u201d Adam stressed, hinting to his housekeeper that it was time for her to return to the kitchen.<\/span><\/p>\n

She gave an indignant huff, muttered, \u201cCan\u2019t see me one good reason why yeh just don\u2019t marry Miss Laddie so her da doesn\u2019t have ta\u2019 send fer her,\u201d then bustled off to the kitchen to finish drying the dishes, and to start the dough rising for the next morning\u2019s biscuits.<\/span><\/p>\n

One of the things Adam loved about Laddie Brockington, and there were many, but the one that he loved about her the most right then, was that she didn\u2019t use Mrs. O\u2019Connell\u2019s blunt manner of speaking as a tool to get him to propose to her. The woman said nothing about Bridget O\u2019Connell\u2019s views on matrimony, but instead, changed the subject.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAre you all right?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m fine. If I didn\u2019t spar with Mrs. O\u2019Connell at least once a day, I\u2019d think I\u2019d come home to the wrong house.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie smiled briefly at the man\u2019s joke. \u201cThat\u2019s not what I meant.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo. What I meant was, you seemed upset when I first arrived this evening. Then you left the dining room rather abruptly after we finished eating.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam picked up a small, delicate hand and kissed the back of it. \u201cI\u2019m sorry. I didn\u2019t mean to be rude.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sure you didn\u2019t, but it\u2019s apparent something\u2019s been on your mind for several weeks now.\u201d She teased, \u201cNot another woman, I hope.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot unless her name is Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJo?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAs in Joseph.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh. Well, my father named me Laddie, so I suppose it\u2019s possible there\u2019s another man somewhere who longed so greatly for a son, that he named his poor little girl Joseph.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI suppose, but not in this case.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Paper crinkled as Adam picked the letter up from his lap and skimmed it again.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDo you have a new student for me?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

A few seconds passed, before Adam realized Laddie had spoken to him.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPardon?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA student. I heard paper rustle. I assume you\u2019ve received a letter from someone who wants to hire a teacher during our summer break.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI did.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen where am I off to?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re not off to anywhere.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh. Is the student coming to us in September, then? To the institute?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen why aren\u2019t I being sent to teach him?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause I\u2019m afraid this student will be too much for even the formidable Miss Brockington to take on.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut it\u2019s said that the rowdiest of boys shake in their knickers when they hear the swoosh of my skirts.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam chuckled. \u201cThat may be true, but the boy I\u2019m thinking of hasn\u2019t worn knickers in many years now, and like his oldest brother, he\u2019s too stubborn for his own good.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie tilted her head. \u201cHis oldest brother?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMe. This letter is from my father.\u201d Adam glanced at the paper again. \u201cMy brother Joe. . .Pa sent me a telegram a few weeks ago, Laddie. There was an accident when my brothers were storing some nitroglycerin. Joe lost his sight.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy didn\u2019t you tell me sooner?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI suppose because, like Pa, I was holding out hope that Joe\u2019s eyesight would return a week or two after the explosion.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd was there such hope?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cInitially, the family doctor seemed to think so. But now. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut now things have changed in that regard,\u201d Laddie surmised.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cApparently so. My father wants to hire a teacher.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou specifically?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot that he stated. His exact request is that I send someone I consider to be \u2018highly qualified, and the best possible candidate to teach Joseph.\u2019 I just so happen to think that candidate is me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut you teach geography and literature at the institute, not skills for the blind, like I do.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s true, but according to what Pa says in his letter, Joe\u2019s refusing all suggestions of a teacher.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd you think he\u2019s the first blind man who\u2019s said he doesn\u2019t want help?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, but I know Joe. I know how cantankerous he can be when he puts his mind to it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd you think he\u2019ll be any less cantankerous for you?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam shook his head, then remembered that Laddie couldn\u2019t see him.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo. Actually, he\u2019ll probably be even more cantankerous, just because it is me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen why are you so insistent upon being his teacher?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause. . .\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s eyes traveled to the framed photograph he kept on the wooden mantel that was taken shortly before he left Virginia City six years ago. His father was seated in the picture, his three sons forming what almost seemed to be a protective semi-circle around him \u2013 Hoss directly behind Pa\u2019s chair because of his girth, and then Adam standing on Pa\u2019s right, and Joe on Pa\u2019s left, with a hand on Pa\u2019s shoulder. The photographer hadn\u2019t told Joe to touch their father. Joe had done so of his own accord, because that was the type of relationship he\u2019d always had with Pa. Sometimes stormy, yes. Sometimes loud and volatile too, when Pa and Joe lost their tempers with one another over something Joe had done, or wanted to do, or was determined to do, despite Pa\u2019s admonishments against it. But close, as well. They\u2019d always been close in a way Adam envied, but could never quite attain, simply because it wasn\u2019t in his nature to be an open book in the way Joe was to his family.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause why, Adam?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The man\u2019s eyes were drawn from the photograph he\u2019d stared at more times than he\u2019d ever confess to since returning from sea and settling in this house he\u2019d inherited from his deceased grandfather.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause he\u2019s my brother.\u201d Adam reached out and gently wound one of Laddie\u2019s pale, corkscrew curls around his index finger. \u201cBecause he\u2019s my little brother, and at one time he thought I could walk on water. He probably hasn\u2019t thought that in many years now, and rightfully so, but when he was a kid, he was eager to learn anything from me that I was willing to teach him. Maybe. . .just maybe,\u201d Adam said softly, as his eyes moved to linger on Joe\u2019s image in the picture, \u201cI can convince him to learn from me again.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 1<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Ben walked out of the house. He slowed his pace, then paused as he stepped from the wooden porch to the dirt. Cochise stood in the middle of the ranch yard, his front hooves dancing with a nervousness Ben rarely saw in the gelding. Especially when it was Joe who was saddling him. But today the horse was confused. He knew Joe\u2019s voice and scent, but he didn\u2019t understand why his master was suddenly so clumsy. Or so Ben surmised were the horse\u2019s thoughts.<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben felt like he was watching a child attempting to saddle a horse with a blindfold on. Joe reached out a hand, waving it in the air until it came in contact with Cochise\u2019s side. He took a step forward, trying to hoist the saddle over the horse\u2019s back. Except by the time Joe got the saddle in the air, the skittish Cochise had pranced three steps away from him. As the saddle hit the ground, Joe cursed, \u201cDamn you, Cochise! You know better than that.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben shook his head. He\u2019d never heard Joe cuss his beloved mount. He stood silently watching Joe repeat this routine four more times. How many times it had been repeated prior to his arrival, Ben couldn\u2019t guess. By the sweat staining the front of Joe\u2019s shirt and running down his face, Ben figured it\u2019d been going on for quite a while. Although he didn\u2019t have any concerns that Cochise would get spooked to the point that he\u2019d rear up and injure Joe, he didn\u2019t like to see an animal worked beyond what it could tolerate. And Cochise, like Joe, was reaching that level.<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben walked toward his son. \u201cI thought you were in your room.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s head turned toward the direction of his father\u2019s voice. Ben still wasn\u2019t used to the sightless eyes, or the way they didn\u2019t land on his face when he spoke to Joe, but instead, stared off somewhere beyond his shoulders. His heart ached at how dull those eyes were now. And his heart ached over how, when Joe had lost his sight, he\u2019d also lost his enthusiasm for life. Ben longed to see those eyes sparkle with mischief again, even if Ben himself was the intended victim of one of Joe\u2019s pranks.<\/span><\/p>\n

How we take for granted the little things until they\u2019re snatched from us. The practical jokes, and the contests Hoss was always being entered in, and the get-rich-quick schemes I used to admonish Joe for as a waste of time. . .I\u2019d gladly get enjoyment from all of those things, if only he could have his eyesight back.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s voice broke into his father\u2019s thoughts.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat would I be doing in my room? Staring at the four walls I can\u2019t see?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Bitterness so unlike Joe. . .or unlike him before the accident, was now present in almost every word he spoke. Ben hated the sound of it. On some days he was torn between telling Joe to stop it, or taking Joe in his arms and urging him to let out all of his fear, pain, and anger.<\/span><\/p>\n

Like he\u2019d been doing ever since the explosion that took Joe\u2019s sight, Ben ignored the bitter words and kept his own tone calm and gentle.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI think you\u2019ve done enough here for today, Joseph.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s not enough, Pa. Until I get this saddle on Cochise, it\u2019ll never be enough.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd if you get the saddle on him, just what are you planning to do?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cRide out and join Hoss rounding up strays.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t! Don\u2019t say I can\u2019t do it!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry, son, but you can\u2019t. At least not right now. But if you\u2019ll let the teacher from the institute come, you might be surprised to discover how many skills you can learn.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo! I told you I don\u2019t want her here.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoseph–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Pa! No teacher. I\u2019ll learn by myself. I don\u2019t need anyone\u2019s help. Besides, it\u2019s not like I\u2019m gonna be blind forever.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben sighed as he watched Joe bend over and search the ground for the saddle with his open palms. It was so apparent that he did need someone\u2019s help, but until Joe was willing to admit that, Ben knew his son was destined to continue failing. Just like he was failing now, as he once again tried to saddle Cochise, and then tried two additional times. Joe finally flung the saddle aside and stomped toward the house.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe. . .Joe, you and I can go find Hoss if that\u2019s what you want! I\u2019ll hitch up the buggy and–\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t wanna ride in the buggy like some helpless woman! Just leave me alone, Pa! Leave me alone!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe stumbled toward the house with his hands waving wildly in front of him. He ran into a hitching post, a porch support post, and then tripped over a chair, before he finally made it to the front door. Ben couldn\u2019t begin to guess how many bruises had marred his son\u2019s shins and arms in recent weeks.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben threw his head back. He stared up at the sky as though he could look right through the clouds to heaven, and get an answer to the questions he\u2019d asked so many times since the explosion.<\/span><\/p>\n

Why? Why my son? Why did Joe have to lose his sight? What did he ever do to deserve this?<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

When the heavens didn\u2019t open and rain answers down upon Ben, he picked up the saddle.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCome on, Cochise. Let\u2019s get you back in the barn.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The horse followed Ben without the man having to get a halter for him. Cochise walked into his stall, seemingly relieved that his master was no longer demanding things of him that he couldn\u2019t comprehend.<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben carried the saddle to the tack room, then made sure Cochise had fresh water.\u00a0<\/span>
\n He rubbed the horse down with a towel, patted his flank, murmured, \u201cGood boy,\u201d in way of thanking Cochise for putting up with Joe\u2019s short temper, and exited the barn.<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben walked to the front porch and righted the chair Joe had knocked over. He sat down in it, staring out at the dry ranch yard. They needed rain badly, but rain was the least of Ben\u2019s concerns. He thought back to the conversation he and Hoss had the previous evening after supper.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat do you think he\u2019s gonna say when the teacher from the institute gets here?\u201d<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSame thing he said when I suggested it in the first place. That he doesn\u2019t want her here.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou know, Pa, maybe. . .maybe you shoulda\u2019 told him you sent for her anyhow.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah. . .maybe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Now Ben second-guessed himself once again. Maybe he shouldn\u2019t have written Adam asking him to send a teacher.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam was the administrator of the Boston Institute for the Blind, and taught classes at the school, too. Therefore, he was the logical person for Ben to seek advice from regarding how to help Joe. Adam was also the logical person to choose a teacher for Joe, because Ben knew without a doubt, that Adam would send the best teacher the school had to offer. Ben had told his son in a letter he\u2019d mailed several weeks earlier, to spare no expense. He didn\u2019t care how much the teacher cost him, or how long she stayed.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Although Adam hadn\u2019t identified the teacher, Ben felt certain the instructor Adam was sending was the one he often mentioned in his letters \u2013 Miss Brockington. Ben wasn\u2019t foolish enough to think that it was only Miss Brockington\u2019s teaching skills Adam was smitten with. His oldest son had written of the woman too often during the past year for Ben not to surmise Adam had feelings for her. And now she was due to arrive on a stage from Reno. Ben had wired Adam enough money to cover one month\u2019s salary, a ticket on the Transcontinental Railroad, a ticket on the stage line, and other traveling expenses, such as food and lodging. Adam had telegraphed back that a teacher would be leaving Boston shortly, and gave an approximate due date for arrival at the Ponderosa. Without Joe\u2019s knowledge, Ben had Hop Sing get the guest room ready.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd make it. . .you know. . .pretty, because our guest is to be a young lady.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHop Sing don\u2019t know how to make pretty. Hop Sing work for Mr. Cartwright and sons too many years to make pretty. Room will look like room looks. If not good enough for young lady, then Hop Sing quit and go work for someone who not ask for pretty.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hop Sing had ended his tirade with his usual, \u201cHumph!\u201d and then stomped off to the kitchen. Despite the housekeeper\u2019s assertion that he didn\u2019t know how to make things pretty, the room had been aired out and dusted, the windows washed, fresh linens were on the bed, flowers bloomed from a vase sitting in the center of the bureau, and small, round soaps that smelled of violets and roses and lemons, along with dainty new towels, rested in fancy scalloped dishes on either side of the pitcher and bowl on the washstand.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

When Ben thanked Hop Sing for the hard work he\u2019d put into fixing up the room, the man grumbled, \u201cYes, lots work. Hop Sing even go Miss Sadie\u2019s Bath Shop to buy towels, and soaps, and dishes. Ladies point and giggle at Hop Sing, because men no go in ladies\u2019 bath shop, but Mr. Cartwright say make room pretty, so Hop Sing do what he told.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThank you. I appreciate all you went through to spruce up that room.\u201d Ben reached in his front pocket for the roll of dollar bills he kept there. \u201cI must owe you some money for the things you bought at Miss Sadie\u2019s.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hop Sing studied Ben\u2019s face a moment. \u201cWill this teacher who come help Little Joe?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI hope so. Adam\u2019s spoken highly of her in his letters.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen you not owe Hop Sing anything. It good enough for Hop Sing if Missy Teacher help Little Joe so he not fall over things and be sad.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben smiled at the man who\u2019d been a part of his household since before Joe was born. He wished it were going to be as easy as Hop Sing made it sound. However, Ben had a feeling it would be anything but easy.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

That conversation took place several days earlier. The feeling that things wouldn\u2019t be easy stayed with Ben. He didn\u2019t know if he was making a mistake by not telling Joe a teacher was coming. He didn\u2019t know if he\u2019d made a mistake by sending for a teacher in the first place, after Joe was adamant that a teacher not be hired. But what was done was done. If there had been no delays during her travels, Miss Brockington would arrive tomorrow. Adam had stated in a telegraphed message that it would be best if Joe weren\u2019t home when the teacher reached the Ponderosa. For that reason, Ben had already arranged for Candy to take Joe on a long ride the next day, and had asked Hop Sing to pack a lunch bucket for the two men. Ben didn\u2019t care if they went by buggy, buckboard, or hiked the ranch on foot, just as long as Candy managed to get Joe away, and keep him away until late afternoon.<\/span><\/p>\n

As Ben\u2019s thoughts turned to the son who was now sitting alone somewhere in the house \u2013 mostly likely in his room with the door closed, staring at the four walls he couldn\u2019t see, as Joe had so accurately stated \u2013 Ben decided it was worth dealing with Joseph\u2019s fury when he discovered his father had gone against his wishes. If only Miss Brockington could show Joe how to feel useful again, if she could teach Joe the basic skills he needed to function in a world he couldn\u2019t see, then Ben would gladly accept any blame Joe wanted to place at his feet for hiring her.<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam knows what he\u2019s doing,<\/em>\u00a0Ben assured himself.\u00a0He wouldn\u2019t send anyone to teach Joe but the best possible person. He knows Joe as well as Hoss and I do. He knows what kind of a person Joseph will respond to. He knows what kind of a person Joe will work hardest for.<\/em>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben couldn\u2019t help but chuckle a little at his final thoughts.<\/span><\/p>\n

I just hope this teacher won\u2019t be scared off by Joe\u2019s temper, and hightail it back to Boston before tomorrow\u2019s even over. I hope Adam remembered how stubborn and hotheaded his little brother can be, and warned Miss Brockington that Joe\u2019s bark is worse than his bite.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

What Ben didn\u2019t realize was that yes, the teacher knew very well how stubborn and hotheaded Joe could be. That\u2019s why it was Adam Cartwright bound for Virginia City, and not Laddie Brockington.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 2<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

This had been Adam\u2019s first trip on the Transcontinental Railroad. It certainly made traveling across the country a lot easier and quicker, than when he\u2019d left Nevada in 1866. He\u2019d journeyed by sea that time, leaving from San Francisco and sailing around South America, and then north along the Eastern coastline of the United States. The trip took almost four months, but Adam hadn\u2019t minded. It allowed him to clear his head \u2013 and his heart \u2013 of Laura Dayton. And since he\u2019d hired on as a crewmember in an effort to get his \u201csea legs\u201d prior to arriving in Boston and starting work for his grandfather, the long journey also allowed Adam to gain some valuable experience.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

But this time, Adam was thankful for the luxury of the train line in operation just three years. His seafaring days had ended about the same time the Transcontinental Railroad welcomed her first cross-country passengers, and for numerous reasons, Adam had no desire to travel by ship again.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

The trip from Boston to Reno took just eight days. Adam stayed overnight in Reno, then caught a stage for Virginia City the next morning. Good weather and no breakdowns meant Adam arrived in Virginia City early that afternoon \u2013 exactly as he\u2019d estimated. Had he been traveling during the winter months, the length of the trip would have been difficult to predict due to snowfall. Not even trains were yet able to travel through deep snow, though Adam had read predictions stating that within the next two decades, railway travel would become so sophisticated that even foul weather wouldn\u2019t cause lengthy delays.<\/span><\/p>\n

Though he hadn\u2019t lived in the West for six years, Adam still favored a black cowboy hat over any type currently popular with men in the East. Right before the stage came to a stop in Virginia City, Adam pulled the brim of his hat down low on his forehead. If he could get to the Ponderosa without anyone recognizing him, it would be for the best. First of all, he didn\u2019t want word of his impending arrival to reach his father or brothers, and second of all, he didn\u2019t want to stop and answer questions that were no one\u2019s business.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam subtly studied the town while the stage driver untied his luggage from the rack. Virginia City had changed some since Adam left \u2013 grown larger, and contained an entire new section sprawling off to the south. He also caught sight of a new church and wondered if the Baptists, who used to meet in the back of Harper\u2019s General Store, had finally raised enough funds to erect a building. He noticed the schoolhouse had expanded, too. It was no longer the one-room structure Adam and his brothers had attended, but now contained a second floor, and what appeared to be three additional classrooms on the first floor.<\/span><\/p>\n

The stage driver\u2019s voice interrupted Adam\u2019s observations.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNeed help gettin\u2019 these bags somewhere, Mister?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUm. . .yes. Thanks.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s a hotel just \u2018cross the way.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI see that, but I won\u2019t be staying there.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUh huh. You mind helping me get my luggage to the livery stable down the street? I\u2019ll pay you for your trouble.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNope, don\u2019t mind \u2018et all,\u201d the man said, while hoisting a suitcase with each hand.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam led the way, carrying a valise that was just large enough for two changes of clothing and daily necessities, like his toothbrush, toothpowder, and a comb.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

When they arrived inside the livery, Adam paid the driver for his trouble just like he\u2019d promised. The man hurried back to his stage, leaving Adam alone to negotiate whatever business he needed to.<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam didn\u2019t recognize the boy who took care of him at Jensen\u2019s Livery. An educated guess told him that the tow-headed youth he estimated to be thirteen or fourteen was one of Tom Jensen\u2019s eight sons \u2013 or at least Tom had eight sons back when Adam left Virginia City. By now, he could have several more for all Adam knew. Regardless, Adam didn\u2019t ask the boy his name, because he didn\u2019t want to in turn, be asked his name. He paid to rent a horse, thankful there were no other customers in the livery, and that Tom wasn\u2019t present, either. Though the boy didn\u2019t appear to have any idea who his customer was, Tom would know Adam the second he spotted him.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSon, can I pay you to come pick up the horse tomorrow, and bring these two suitcases along as well?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, Sir. Just tell me when and where.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhen is whatever time\u2019s convenient for you. Where is the Ponderosa.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The boy led a bay gelding from a stall and threw a saddle blanket across his back.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re goin\u2019 to visit the Cartwrights?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI am.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHear what happened to Joe?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOne of Mr. Cartwright\u2019s sons. He was blinded in an explosion \u2019bout two months back. No one\u2019s seen him since. Some of my friends say that probably means he\u2019s not right in the head now too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy would Joe not be right in the head?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201c \u2018Cause of the explosion. It musta\u2019 addled his brain or something. They say we never lay eyes on him \u2018cause Mr. Cartwright\u2019s hiding him. You know, \u2018cause he\u2019s ashamed of him, an\u2019 all.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh, I see. May I ask you something?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSure. My pa says the only thing free around this place are answers to a customer\u2019s questions.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam chuckled. That sounded like something Tom would say.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOkay, since answers to questions are free, here\u2019s my question. How well do you know Mr. Cartwright?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPretty good, I guess. He\u2019s president of the school board, an\u2019 when he\u2019s in town, he usually stops by here an\u2019 talks to my pa for a while.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSo, if you know Mr. Cartwright that well, do you really think he\u2019d be ashamed of one of his sons, or hide him?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell. . .no,\u201d the boy admitted, while securing Adam\u2019s valise to the rear of the saddle with two sturdy leather straps. \u201cI don\u2019t reckon so.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen the next time those friends of yours are trying to start rumors by saying Ben Cartwright\u2019s ashamed of one of his sons, or that Joe isn\u2019t right in the head, you stand up to them and tell them you know those things aren\u2019t true.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut I don\u2019t know for certain they\u2019re not true.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen allow me to assure you that they\u2019re not.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd just who are you?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSomeone who knows Ben Cartwright better than anyone in this town.\u201d Adam mounted the horse. He nodded toward his suitcases. \u201cYou\u2019ll keep those safe overnight, and bring them to me tomorrow?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, Sir.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam reached in a pocket for his money clip and plucked a dollar bill from it. He leaned forward in the saddle, handing it to the boy.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s a long ride out to the Ponderosa. I\u2019ll have another one of those for you when you arrive with my luggage, and maybe we can even sweet talk Hop Sing into giving you a glass of lemonade, along with some cookies.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The boy\u2019s eyes grew round.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve never gotten a tip this big before. Thanks, Mister.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re welcome.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam gave the horse\u2019s sides a gentle nudge with his cowboy boots \u2013 footwear that he hadn\u2019t completely given up, any more than he\u2019d given up his hat.<\/span><\/p>\n

As he rode out of the stable, he heard the boy call, \u201cHey, Mister, I didn\u2019t catch your name!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam pretended he didn\u2019t hear the teen as he traveled down the town\u2019s main street. He kept his head bent, and didn\u2019t make eye contact with anyone on the sidewalks. Because it was Saturday, the town was bustling with activity. That actually made it easier for Adam to go unnoticed. Miners and cowboys filled the streets, and drifted in and out of the saloons. Young children not more than five or six years old ran into the General Store for penny candy, while older boys played marbles in the alleys, and girls skipped rope nearby. Women did their weekly shopping; their husbands around somewhere, transacting business at the bank, or Blakes\u2019s Feed and Seed, or Jake Tanner\u2019s hardware store.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam headed out of town, thankful when he reached the open countryside without anyone recognizing him. He traveled Virginia City Road for a while, then exited at a familiar spot Hoss had always claimed cut miles off of the trip to town, while Joe claimed they saved a half of a mile at best, which wasn\u2019t worth the extra time it took to travel through thick stands of trees and over rough rocky ground. Adam had always been inclined to agree with Joe in regards to this so-called shortcut, but he used it today because he knew he wouldn\u2019t encounter anyone on the remainder of his trip to the ranch.<\/span><\/p>\n

The scent of Ponderosa Pines, wild flowers, sun-bleached grass, and even cattle dung, caused Adam to bask in nostalgia as he traveled. For the first time in six years, he was the one place he never thought he\u2019d be again \u2013 home. Not home as in the luxurious house he\u2019d inherited three years ago when his grandfather died, but home as in the place where he\u2019d grown up, the place where he\u2019d worked for a good part of his adult life, and the place where his father and brothers still lived.<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s thoughts skipped to the mental outline he\u2019d made on the trip of things he wanted to teach Joe. He had Braille books in one of his suitcases, and each week, the Braille newspaper the students published was to be mailed to him. He\u2019d worked with Laddie for several days prior to leaving Boston in order to sharpen his abilities to teach Joe the skills he\u2019d need to be independent. Laddie was correct when she\u2019d said Adam had never taught these skills to the blind. But he\u2019d seen them taught many times since taking the administrator\u2019s position at the institute, and he\u2019d assisted enough students in his classroom to feel confident that he could help Joe.<\/span><\/p>\n

The man thought of Laura Dayton as he rode, and then thought of the last sea voyage he\u2019d taken. He\u2019d failed at enough things in recent years. Adam was determined that teaching Joe wasn\u2019t going to end up being another failure to add to his list.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam straightened, sitting taller in the saddle, and urged the horse to increase his pace. They were only a few miles from the house now. Although Adam was a little nervous about this surprise visit, he was also eager to be reunited with the father he hadn\u2019t seen since Pa traveled to Boston shortly after Grandfather Stoddard\u2019s death, and especially eager to be reunited with the brothers he hadn\u2019t seen since leaving Virginia City for Massachusetts.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 3<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s body swayed slightly with the rhythm of the buggy. If he couldn\u2019t spend the day with Hoss, then Candy was next on Joe\u2019s short list of people he felt comfortable being around since losing his sight. The other person was Pa, but lately all Pa wanted to do was try and convince Joe to let a teacher for the blind come and help him. Help him do what, Joe repeatedly asked his father. Just what was some prissy woman from the East going to teach him that would be of any value on a ranch?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe supposed Pa wanted to hire someone from that school where Adam worked, but he\u2019d never asked. Nor did he even know if Pa had written Adam about the accident. He assumed so, but again, he hadn\u2019t asked, because he didn\u2019t care. It was better not to show anything that might be mistaken as interest for fear Pa would latch onto it, and then the next thing you know, some teacher would be here.<\/span><\/p>\n

Teacher. Just the word made Joe laugh. He was almost thirty years old, and hadn\u2019t attended school since he was sixteen. The last thing he needed was some woman following him around, nagging him to do this or do that. If he wanted to be nagged, he\u2019d get married. Well. . .he would have gotten married. But now that he was blind, no woman would want him, and he couldn\u2019t blame anyone for that. What good would a blind husband be? He couldn\u2019t make a living. He couldn\u2019t do maintenance around the house. He couldn\u2019t even do something as simple as hitch a horse to a buggy and take children to school. He couldn\u2019t do anything but sit in the chair someone led him to, and stay there until someone came and got him. Not exactly the kind of man women would be standing in line to wed. Not even if they assumed Ben Cartwright would financially support his blind son, without asking for anything in return. And if a woman did assume that and the thought appealed to her, then she assumed wrong, because Joe would never allow it. He refused to be a charity case, nor was he going to be known around Virginia City as, \u201cthe blind son old Ben Cartwright gives money to.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

As the buggy made a turn, Joe\u2019s thoughts shifted from teachers and marriage, to trying to decipher which direction they were traveling \u2013 north, south, east, or west. If there was one thing Joe didn\u2019t have the words to describe, it was how disorienting the world was now that he couldn\u2019t see. He\u2019d never thought it would be possible for the house and ranch he knew so well, to seem like places he\u2019d never been before, just because he no longer had his eyesight. But that\u2019s exactly how it seemed. He couldn\u2019t count how many times he\u2019d tripped coming down the stairs, or had stumbled over a chair, or other piece of furniture. He couldn\u2019t count how many times Pa or Hoss had rushed to him as though he were a clumsy toddler, and helped him get back on his feet. That he needed their assistance in the first place, made him feel foolish, made him feel embarrassed, and made him feel stupid. And more than anything else, it was times like that when he hated being blind.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

But he wasn\u2019t going to be blind forever. Doc Martin had said his eyesight might come back. Granted, the last time the doctor was out, he did try to tell Joe that since his sight had been gone for two months, it was becoming more and more doubtful that it would return, but Joe didn\u2019t believe him. Pa always said if you had faith, anything was possible. Well, Joe had plenty of faith when it came to wanting to see again. He was just waiting for God to get around to him.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe smelled the sharp scent of the Ponderosa Pines they were traveling amongst. He closed his eyes, picturing the towering trees on either side of the road. How he wished when he opened his eyes, he\u2019d be able see them. Lately, it was getting harder and harder to open his eyes during a moment like this, because if Joe were honest with himself, he\u2019d admit he knew Doc Martin was right. He wasn\u2019t going to get his sight back. But Joe wasn\u2019t ready to admit that, so when doubts crept in, he shoved them aside and reminded himself that, no matter what anyone else said, this nightmare would end soon. Yet deep inside, Joe knew the real reason why he wouldn\u2019t allow a teacher to come to the Ponderosa. If he told his father to send for one, then Joe might as well admit he\u2019d never see again, because sending for a teacher was the same as saying, \u201cI give up.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Candy\u2019s voice interrupted Joe\u2019s thoughts.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou okay?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe turned his head to the left. He wondered if he was looking at Candy, or if, like he\u2019d seen other blind people do, he was looking somewhere over Candy\u2019s shoulder, or above his head, or even down at his feet. Now he understood why that happened. Without your sight, you could only estimate the location of a person\u2019s face.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah.\u201d Joe offered his friend a small smile. \u201cYeah, I\u2019m fine.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t have a headache, do you?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe had been plagued by the worst headaches he\u2019d ever experienced during the first couple of weeks after the explosion. They\u2019d let up recently, though occasionally, he was still bothered by one so intense that all he could do was lie on his bed and be grateful for the cold compresses Pa or Hoss held to his forehead.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo. I\u2019m okay.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019ve been pretty quiet since we ate lunch.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe shrugged, while turning his head to face forward again.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAny reason?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo. It\u2019s just. . .it\u2019s different when you\u2019re blind, ya\u2019 know?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Joe, I don\u2019t know.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Again, Joe smiled. He appreciated Candy\u2019s honesty. If he\u2019d said the same thing to Hoss, Hoss would have changed the subject, simply because he was so kind-hearted and sensitive that he seemed to think if they didn\u2019t talk about Joe\u2019s inability to see, then Joe wouldn\u2019t remember he was blind. If Joe had said it to Pa. . .well, Pa would have probably used it as an opportunity to say something in return like, \u201cIf you\u2019d let me hire a teacher, son, it wouldn\u2019t have to be so different.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

But Candy wasn\u2019t his brother, or his father. Maybe that\u2019s why it was easier to talk to him about the word Hoss could barely stand to say, and that filled Pa\u2019s voice with sadness.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s different, because you have to listen harder when you\u2019re blind,\u201d Joe explained. \u201cIt\u2019s almost as if my ears have become my eyes, if that makes any sense.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt does.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI suppose before I went blind, I could tell you if it was Pa or Hoss walking down the hallway at night, but I never paid much attention. Never had reason to \u2013 except in my younger days, when I was sneaking into the house through my bedroom window at two in the morning. At times like that, you can bet I knew if it was Pa coming down the hall.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Candy laughed. \u201cI\u2019m sure ya\u2019 did.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut now I always know which one of them it is. And Pa. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat about your pa?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHe paces a lot. He never used to do that, Candy. But now he paces almost every night. I don\u2019t know what time it is, since I can\u2019t see the clock, but it\u2019s a few hours after we go to bed. He\u2019s not sleeping because of me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t know that for sure.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat else would it be?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHe runs a big operation here. He\u2019s probably got a lotta things on his mind. If I owned a place this size, I\u2019d pace every so often too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe shook his head. \u201cHe\u2019s never done it before. Business is important to Pa, but it\u2019s never been so important to him that he loses sleep over it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cEven if he is having trouble sleeping because of you, Joe \u2013 because you\u2019ve lost your sight \u2013 you can\u2019t feel guilty over it. After all, he is a father. Worrying about their kids is what fathers do.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI guess. I just. . .I hate that I\u2019ve given him something to worry about. He\u2019s not getting any younger, ya\u2019 know.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBetter not let Ben Cartwright hear you say that.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe chuckled. \u201cNo, I\u2019d better not.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Although it was just yesterday that Joe had told his father he didn\u2019t want to be taken for a ride in a buggy like a helpless woman, he appreciated the invitation Candy had extended to him after breakfast. Not even Pa balked at Candy missing a day of work. He\u2019d said he thought it was a good idea for the two men to go off and do whatever it was they wanted to. Usually with Joe and Candy, that meant riding into Virginia City for a few beers, a few hands of poker, and some girl watching. Maybe even some girl \u201ccatching,\u201d if they got lucky. But without Joe having to say so, Candy knew Virginia City was off-limits. The buggy never left the Ponderosa, and they hadn\u2019t encountered anyone the entire day, much to Joe\u2019s relief. They\u2019d done some fishing, taken a walk, napped beneath the warm sun after they\u2019d eaten their noon meal, then fished again. They hadn\u2019t caught anything, but that didn\u2019t matter. If you wanted to catch fish, you brought Hoss along. For whatever reason, he was the one who had the ability to fill a bucket with fish thirty minutes after casting his line. Adam had always said if Hoss decided to give up ranching, he could make a fortune crewing a fishing boat. Picturing his huge, land-loving brother who was prone to seasickness, wearing a sailor\u2019s cap and skippering a boat, was almost more than Joe could bear. He\u2019d double over laughing each time Adam said that, while Hoss acted all put-out and demanded, \u201cAnd just what\u2019s so dadburn funny \u2018bout that, little brother?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

It had been a long time now since Joe shared a laugh with both of his brothers, or a day of fishing. Six years long. Since Adam didn\u2019t appear to have a desire to return to the Ponderosa, Joe doubted they\u2019d ever share anything again.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Pa had visited Adam a few years back, after Adam\u2019s grandfather died, while Joe and Hoss remained at home to run the ranch. Pa hadn\u2019t said much about the visit when he\u2019d returned three months later, and ever since then, whenever Adam wrote, his letters were always addressed to Pa in unfamiliar handwriting, which made Joe wonder if his brother was now so highfalutin that he dictated even his personal correspondence to a secretary. No letters came any longer addressed to the entire family, or addressed just to Joe, or just to Hoss. Joe knew Hoss had continued to write to Adam for a while, but Joe hadn\u2019t bothered with it. If Adam couldn\u2019t take the time to write him, then why should Joe waste time writing letters that were never answered? And besides, he didn\u2019t want an answer if Adam\u2019s secretary was the one sending it to him.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Nonetheless, this didn\u2019t mean Pa didn\u2019t tell them news of Adam, or read his letters out loud after supper, because most often he did. But whatever happened to cause Abel Stoddard\u2019s death \u2013 and Joe was convinced there was more to it than just an old man\u2019s \u201cquiet passing,\u201d as Pa maintained upon his return from Boston \u2013 had changed Adam in some way. Or, maybe he\u2019d just gotten busy being the administrator of that blind school, and making a life for himself amongst Boston\u2019s elite citizens. Or so Joe assumed. He could picture Adam at the kind of stuffy parties where you had to wear a suit coat, a waistcoat, woolen trousers, tie, and shoes that pinched your toes, and where all the men adjourned to a drawing room to smoke cigars, drink brandy, and talk politics. Not the kind of party Joe wanted to attend, that was for sure, or Hoss either.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Therefore, Joe was just as happy to stay on the Ponderosa and let Adam have his life in Boston. If that\u2019s what Adam wanted, then so be it. Sure, it would have been nice to get a letter from him every so often, like Joe did back when Adam was at sea. But Joe knew time and distance changed a relationship whether you wanted it to or not. Didn\u2019t Pa always say he was close to his brother John when they were growing up? But now, Pa hadn\u2019t seen John in almost forty years. And though they wrote to one another, it wasn\u2019t with any great frequency.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Candy\u2019s voice broke into Joe\u2019s thoughts once again.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIs there anywhere else you wanna go before I head this rig towards home?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe wanted to tell Candy not to take him home. After all, there was nothing for him to do at the house but sit in the great room, or sit in his bedroom. But where else could they go? It\u2019s not like they could drive around the Ponderosa for days on end without Hoss or Pa coming to look for them.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo. No, I guess not. What time is it?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

By the movement of the buggy, Joe could tell Candy was now holding the reins with one hand, and reaching for his pocket watch with the other.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cQuarter to five. Before we left this morning I heard your pa tell Hop Sing to have supper ready at six, so I suppose we\u2019d better mosey on in that direction.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI suppose.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe leaned back and held onto the buggy\u2019s frame with his right hand. The depression that had been his constant companion since losing his sight returned in full force now that they were headed home, and he had nothing to look forward to but another long, boring evening. He stared straight ahead seeing only black, and prayed that God would soon change things for the better.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 4<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Watching Joe try and unhitch the horse from the buggy made Candy realize how inaccurate the phrase, \u201cI can do it with my eyes closed,\u201d really was. Candy had no doubt Joe\u2019d been unhitching horses from buggies without help since he was ten years old. Now, he fumbled his way through the chore, as clumsy as a kid doing this job for the first time.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Candy didn\u2019t say anything as he stepped forward to help. He\u2019d seen Joe lose his temper with his father and Hoss often enough during recent weeks to know the best way to go about giving Joe assistance, was to do so unobtrusively, and without offering instructions. Candy made small talk while they worked, just like he\u2019d do if Joe still had his sight.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPretty nice day, huh?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSure was. Thanks for takin\u2019 me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo need to thank me. Got me out of branding.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s smile seemed hollow and wooden to Candy. As though he\u2019d give anything to be able to spend a day branding cattle.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, guess it did. I\u2019ll be glad to help you get outta more work if you can convince my pa we need to go fishing several times a week.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Candy clapped his friend on the shoulder. \u201cYou can count on me to give it my best shot.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe snorted. \u201cI\u2019m sure I can.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Candy walked beside Joe when they left the carriage house with Joe leading the horse known as Old Pete. Candy kept a hand on Joe\u2019s elbow, guiding him toward the barn. His hand remained where it was as they entered the barn and Joe stalled Pete. Joe did a pretty good job of rubbing the horse down, while Candy got water and grain for the animal.<\/span><\/p>\n

As he worked, Candy\u2019s eyes kept traveling to an unfamiliar horse in the last stall. He hadn\u2019t pictured the teacher arriving on horseback. A woman from Boston conjured up images of fancy dresses with matching hats, white gloves, maybe a parasol or two, and a buckboard filled with trunks of clothing, as opposed to a woman in riding clothes, who traveled so lightly that whatever she\u2019d brought with her could fit behind a saddle.<\/span><\/p>\n

Candy shrugged. Either way, it wasn\u2019t his concern. Mr. Cartwright had asked him to keep the news of the teacher\u2019s arrival from Joe, and Candy would continue to honor that request. He didn\u2019t mention the strange horse as he and Joe tended to Pete. He didn\u2019t rush Joe in currying Pete, or even assist with finding the brush when Joe dropped it and had to search Pete\u2019s stall for it on his hands and knees.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Candy kept glancing toward the house, hoping Mr. Cartwright or Hoss would come out to get Joe. The foreman had witnessed numerous blow-ups since Joe\u2019d lost his sight that he felt he shouldn\u2019t have been privy to. He had no desire to witness the one he knew would lift the rafters right off the house, when Joe found out a teacher was inside waiting for him. While Candy appreciated the fact that Ben Cartwright treated him like a son, and Joe and Hoss treated him like a brother, when you came right down to it, he wasn\u2019t related to the Cartwrights. As an old cowhand once told Candy long before he came to work on the Ponderosa, no matter how close a foreman grew to be to the ranch owner and his family, it was always wise to remember that you were still hired help. A man doesn\u2019t fire his son. His foreman, however, is another story. Not that Candy had any concerns Ben Cartwright would fire him because he\u2019d seen Joe barely in control of himself on a few occasions since the accident, but to Candy\u2019s way of thinking, the Cartwrights deserved their privacy at a time like this. How the family handled Joe\u2019s loss of sight was their business, not Candy\u2019s, and not anyone else\u2019s.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHey,\u201d Joe said, \u201chow about goin\u2019 in for supper?\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe used one hand to hang onto the stall while walking out of it. Candy ran over and grabbed a short stool in the man\u2019s path. He scooped it up, putting it down on the other side of the stall without Joe knowing he\u2019d ever been in danger. Candy placed a hand at his friend\u2019s elbow again.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSounds good,\u201d Candy agreed, though at the same time he wondered how quickly he could escape from the house. If he were lucky, he\u2019d be able to hightail it out of there before Mr. Cartwright got a chance to introduce Joe to the teacher.<\/span><\/p>\n

Candy stared at the front door as they crossed the ranch yard. He willed Hoss to open it and step out for his brother. When that didn\u2019t happen, Candy had no choice but to continue to walk with Joe.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe fumbled for the knob and opened the door. At first, Candy assumed the teacher was resting in the room Hop Sing had prepared for her. He saw Mr. Cartwright sitting in his chair by the fireplace, looking content and happy in a way Candy hadn\u2019t seen him look since the explosion. Hoss stood by the grandfather clock, as though he was waiting to walk with someone to the sitting area. It wasn\u2019t until another person came into view, that Candy realized the man had been standing by Mr. Cartwright\u2019s desk, his presence blocked by Hoss\u2019s body. For a brief second, Candy saw a wistful look lingering on the man\u2019s face. As though he was getting reacquainted with old and cherished memories. But what memories did this room hold for the dark headed stranger dressed all in black?<\/span><\/p>\n

As soon as Candy and Joe\u2019s presence registered with everyone, Mr. Cartwright stood. The visitor remained silent as Mr. Cartwright approached wearing a big smile.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThere you two are. Did you have a good day?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSure did, Pa.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Mr. Cartwright took Joe\u2019s hat as the blind man attempted to place it on the sideboard. Candy saw the stranger frown at that action, as though he thought Mr. Cartwright shouldn\u2019t have helped Joe with such a simple task.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe didn\u2019t catch any fish, though,\u201d Joe said. \u201cGuess we shoulda\u2019 brought Hoss along.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGuess you shoulda\u2019,\u201d Hoss agreed. \u201cNext time you two get ta\u2019 spend the day loafin\u2019, make sure ya\u2019 fill me in on it \u2018fore you go ridin\u2019 outta here.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe sure will, big brother.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Candy stepped back, letting Mr. Cartwright take Joe\u2019s elbow. He didn\u2019t care that the table was set with a place for him, and that Hop Sing was already bringing out platters of food that made his stomach growl. He turned for the door, wanting to leave before the fireworks started, but he wasn\u2019t quick enough.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoseph\u2026son\u2026\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s brow furrowed. Mr. Cartwright\u2019s eyes darted to Candy, then to Hoss, then to the man who was now standing beside Hoss. Candy could hear the suspicion in Joe\u2019s voice. As though Joe suddenly knew some surprise was about to be sprung on him that he wasn\u2019t going to like.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat is it, Pa?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoseph, about that teacher–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe pulled away from his father. \u201cI told you I don\u2019t want a teacher.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know what you told me, but–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s no buts about it. I said I don\u2019t wanna teacher!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, son, it\u2019s. . .it\u2019s a little too late for that, because–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause you went and sent for one anyway, didn\u2019t you? You sent for one anyway after I told you not to, didn\u2019t you?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, Joe, I did.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHow could you? I. . .I. . .\u201d Joe lurched forward as though trying to flee from the room. As though he feared a woman was present to witness what no man wanted a woman to see. Not even a woman he didn\u2019t know. His vulnerability. His fear. His humiliation.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI told you not to, Pa! I told you not to!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe tumbled headlong into the blue chair by the stairs. When Mr. Cartwright ran to him and tried to help him up, Joe pushed his father aside.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGet away from me! Leave me alone!\u201d Joe lurched for the stairs again, heading for his room using a stumbling half-crawl that made Hoss drop his gaze, and brought tears to Mr. Cartwright\u2019s eyes.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI told you I don\u2019t wanna teacher! Why didn\u2019t you listen to me?\u201d Joe\u2019s voice broke with the anger and emotion he could no longer keep in-check. \u201cI-I-I told\u00a0<\/span>
\n you. . .I told you I don\u2019t wanna teacher, damn it! I don\u2019t want a teacher!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

For the first time, the stranger spoke. His voice was gentle, his tone filled with a quiet kind of understanding.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot even if the teacher is your brother, Joe?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe spun around, a hand grappling for the railing behind him. His eyes widened, and Candy swore he saw Joe\u2019s lips silently form the word, \u201cAdam?\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe?\u201d the man questioned again. \u201cHow about it? How about if I\u2019m your teacher?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe made a stifled sound that was a cross between a sob and shocked surprise. For just a moment, Candy thought he was going to witness a happy reunion. But then the moment passed, and the shouting started again.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo! I told Pa no teacher! Just. . .just go back to Boston, Adam! Now that you\u2019ve satisfied your curiosity, I\u2019m sure you\u2019ve got better things to do than baby-sit your blind brother. Like dictate letters to your secretary, or discuss politics with your rich neighbors, or smoke cigars, or drink brandy, or-or-or–\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Joe, I don\u2019t have anything better to do.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell I do! And none of what I\u2019ve got planned involves you!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

With that, Joe turned and scrambled up the stairs on his hands and knees. Candy could have predicted the sound of a slamming door before he heard it. Hoss let out a heavy sigh of disappointment, while Mr. Cartwright bowed his head in defeat.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

This new Cartwright was the only one who didn\u2019t seem particularly disturbed by Joe\u2019s actions. He walked over to Candy and held out his hand.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHi. You must be Candy.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Candy tried not to stare as they exchanged an awkward handshake.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUh. . .yeah,\u201d Candy acknowledged to the man he\u2019d heard mentioned on numerous occasions, but had never met. \u201cI am.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNice to meet you. In the event you haven\u2019t figured it out yet, I\u2019m Joe\u2019s brother Adam.\u201d Adam\u2019s eyes flicked to the stairway, and a slight smile curved his lips. \u201cHe\u2019s obviously missed me a great deal since I\u2019ve been gone.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Candy couldn\u2019t help but smile in return. Joe might not want to be told this right now, but it was apparent he and his oldest brother shared a similar sense of humor. Because of that, Candy had a feeling he was going to like Adam Cartwright just fine. He hoped Joe would come to his senses and be willing to learn all that his brother could teach him. If not. . .well, if not, just by looking at the exhausted slump of Mr. Cartwright\u2019s shoulders, Candy knew Joe\u2019s refusal would break his father\u2019s heart.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 5<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Adam couldn\u2019t blame Candy for his hasty retreat after the introductions ended. The foreman said something about eating in the bunkhouse with the men, then took off like a \u201cscalded cat,\u201d as Hoss would say. Adam got the impression Candy usually ate the evening meal with his employers, so he appreciated the man forgoing that tradition tonight in favor of allowing Adam and his family their privacy. Besides, the way things were looking right now, no one had much of an appetite. Not even Hoss.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Thirty minutes had passed since the door to Joe\u2019s room slammed shut. Without voicing any complaints, Hop Sing carried the food to the stove to keep it warm. That Hop Sing wasn\u2019t cussing them out in Cantonese while he scurried back and forth to the kitchen, spoke volumes for the mood in the house. What had begun as a joyous reunion, turned into angry words filled with fear, embarrassment, and resentment. The first two emotions Adam understood. It was natural for Joe to be frightened of the dark world he now found himself living in, and to be embarrassed when encountering someone he wasn\u2019t comfortable with. By virtue of the years he\u2019d been gone, Adam was forced to acknowledge he fell into that category. But the resentment . . .Adam didn\u2019t even have a secretary, so what Joe meant by that remark was a mystery.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Little Brother, you might have some gray in your hair now \u2013 and God knows that shocked the hell out of me \u2013 but despite having hair that\u2019s on its way to being the color of Pa\u2019s, you can still turn this household upside down with that temper of yours.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Ten years ago, those same thoughts would have been shrouded with irritation. Now, Adam found them funny. Joe was Joe. Just like Adam was who he was. The essence of a man\u2019s personality never seemed to change greatly from what it had been in childhood, despite the maturity and wisdom the passage of time gives most everyone.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam wished his father and Hoss could find some of the same amusement \u2013 and hope \u2013 in Joe\u2019s temper that he did. Pa sat in his chair with a far away look in his eyes, as though he\u2019d sell the Ponderosa for a dollar if only someone would promise to give Joe his sight back in return. And Hoss \u2013 that tenderhearted, bear-of-a-brother Adam hadn\u2019t realized how much he\u2019d missed until they\u2019d been reunited a few hours earlier \u2013 stood staring forlornly into the fireplace with his hands shoved deep in his front pockets.<\/span><\/p>\n

Pa and Hoss were so mired in their worries for Joe, that they didn\u2019t notice Adam\u2019s inability to take his gaze from them. The intensity of Adam\u2019s emotions surprised him. Yes, he\u2019d been looking forward to seeing his family, but he hadn\u2019t expected the hugs to last so long, or for it to be so difficult to step from those embraces. And the tears that came to his eyes while wrapped in his father\u2019s arms. . .well, Adam hadn\u2019t anticipated those at all.<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss was the first person to notice Adam\u2019s homecoming. As Adam dismounted his horse, Hoss stepped from the barn, not immediately recognizing the \u201cstranger.\u201d It wasn\u2019t until Adam pushed the brim of his hat up and Hoss clearly saw his face, that recognition occurred. And even then, it took Hoss a few seconds to act on that recognition. He stared at Adam as though a ghost had ridden onto the Ponderosa, then he grinned and let out a whoop of joy while throwing his hat in the air.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam! Adam, you\u2019re home!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Before Adam could react, he was picked up in massive arms and swung around three times. When he was finally on the ground again, he exchanged a long and powerful hug with his brother. After the hug ended, they stood back and absorbed the sight of each other, taking note of six years worth of changes. In Hoss\u2019s case, his hairline had receded more, and he was thinner on top, too, but wider around the middle.<\/span><\/p>\n

In Adam\u2019s case, Hoss noticed the obvious difference right away. But when he questioned, \u201cAdam?\u201d with confusion, Adam shook his head.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019ll talk about it after I get settled \u2013 and in private, where Joe can\u2019t overhear us.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The confusion didn\u2019t leave Hoss\u2019s face, but he nodded his understanding that there were things Adam didn\u2019t want Joe to know about just yet.<\/span><\/p>\n

Before the brothers were able to say anything else, the front door opened. Hoss shoved Adam behind him as Pa walked out.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHoss! What\u2019s all the ruckus about?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam could hear the grin in Hoss\u2019s voice.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNothin\u2019, Pa! The teacher just got here, that\u2019s all.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTeacher?\u201d Pa\u2019s voice drew closer. \u201cWhere?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam imagined the puzzlement on his father\u2019s face, when the only thing Pa saw was a horse with a small valise secured to the saddle. It wasn\u2019t the way Pa was expecting the teacher to travel the final leg of the journey. To prevent anyone from the Ponderosa being sent to meet his stage, Adam had told his father via a telegram that the teacher would hire a buggy and driver at Jensen\u2019s Livery upon arrival.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cRight here, Pa,\u201d Hoss had said. \u201cBehind me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell then, bring her up to the house, for pity sake. We don\u2019t want Miss Brockington standing under the hot sun.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I don\u2019t reckon we do. Only the \u201cmiss\u201d ain\u2019t a miss, after all. She\u2019s a mister.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA what?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cShe\u2019s a mister, Pa.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, what in tarnation are you talking about? Now quit taking over your brother Joseph\u2019s role as the family practical joker, and show Miss Brockington some proper hospitality.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s like I already told ya\u2019, Pa, she\u2019s not a miss, she\u2019s a. . .\u201d Hoss stepped to the side, as he finished his sentence with, \u201cmister.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Pa\u2019s reaction to seeing Adam was almost identical to Hoss\u2019s. Several seconds passed before it registered with him that his oldest son was standing just a few feet away. His face, however, was minus any confusion, because unlike Hoss and Joe, Pa knew how Adam had changed since he\u2019d left home.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam?\u201d Pa whispered. \u201cSon?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, Pa.\u201d Adam smiled as he walked into his father\u2019s arms. \u201cIt\u2019s me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam was enveloped in a hug that seemed to go on forever, and that he had no desire to break. A hand cupped the back of his head, pulling him even closer. Adam returned the hug with just as much strength and emotion, and didn\u2019t try to hide the tears trickling down his face.<\/span><\/p>\n

When Pa finally broke their embrace, he took two steps back, but kept his hands on Adam\u2019s shoulders. He studied his oldest child from head to toe.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou look well, son.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam smiled and nodded his assurance. He knew he looked a far cry better than the last time his father had seen him \u2013 both physically and emotionally healthier than he\u2019d been three years ago.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m fine, Pa.\u201d Adam patted his father\u2019s right arm. \u201cI\u2019m just fine.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Pa let his hands drop. \u201cDon\u2019t take this the wrong way, Adam, but what\u2019re you doing here? We were expecting Miss Brockington.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam chuckled. \u201cWhy?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy? Well. . .well. . .well, because I just assumed. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen you assumed wrong. I never said I was sending Laddie.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I guess you didn\u2019t,\u201d Pa admitted. \u201cBut you never said you were coming, either.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI wanted to surprise you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Pa laughed. \u201cYou certainly did that and then some.\u201d Pa placed an arm across Adam\u2019s shoulders. \u201cCome on in the house. We\u2019ll get you a cold drink and a comfortable place to sit.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll put this horse away and be right in ta\u2019 join you fellas.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThanks, brother.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201c \u2018Welcome. Did ya\u2019 rent \u2018im from Tom?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI did.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDo I need to take him back for ya\u2019?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo. One of Tom\u2019s boys is coming out with my luggage tomorrow. He\u2019ll get the horse then.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSounds like a dandy idea.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cFor the promise of a dollar tip, the boy thought so, too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI reckon he did.\u201d Hoss led the horse toward the barn. \u201cDon\u2019t you two start talkin\u2019 without me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe won\u2019t,\u201d Pa promised.<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam walked beside his father to the house. He\u2019d just put his hat on the sideboard when he heard Hop Sing coming from the kitchen.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat all noise about? Is Missy Teacher here? You say Hop Sing serve snacks when Missy Teacher come, but no one tell Hop Sing Missy Teacher get here until Mr. Hoss start yelling like sky falling. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hop Sing\u2019s tirade stopped as he walked around the corner and caught sight of the \u201cteacher.\u201d Like Pa and Hoss had been, the housekeeper was momentarily stunned. When Hop Sing finally spoke again, Adam grinned at the high-spirited chatter he could have predicted was coming next.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Adam! Mr. Adam, you go \u2018way long time! Make father and brothers sad.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know how sad I made anyone, Hop Sing, but it sure feels good to be home.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGood have you home.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Hop Sing eyes lingered on Adam a moment. He didn\u2019t remark on any changes he observed, but unless he\u2019d lost his sight like Joe, he\u2019d surely noticed at least one. However, any questions Hop Sing had he kept to himself as he turned to scold Pa.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou say Missy Teacher come and Hop Sing should get room ready for her! Now no Missy Teacher come. Mr. Adam come, but Mr. Adam\u2019s room not ready. And I make special supper for Missy Teacher, just like you say to. If you say Mr. Adam coming, Hop Sing make Mr. Adam\u2019s favorite foods, but too late now \u2018cause supper started.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam laughed at the little man\u2019s temper. As he\u2019d said, it sure felt good to be home.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t worry about my room, Hop Sing. I\u2019m sure it\u2019s fine. That is, unless one of my brothers has taken it over. If Hoss commandeered it, then the mattress will be sunk in the middle and make my back hurt. If Joe\u2019s claimed it, then the smell of cologne and hair tonic will be so strong that I\u2019ll have to leave the window open for a week.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Mr. Hoss not sleep in your room, and Little Joe not sleep there either. Mr. Adam\u2019s room just like was when he left. Hop Sing think Mr. Hoss and Little Joe leave it \u2018cause they hope Mr. Adam come home someday and want room back.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI think so too, Hop Sing,\u201d Pa agreed with a smile. \u201cNow can you bring some lemonade and cookies for us?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hop Sing shook a finger under Pa\u2019s nose.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot for you, because I work hard to get room ready for Missy Teacher. But for Mr. Adam, yes, I bring snacks.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

After Hop Sing left, Adam teased, \u201cI\u2019ll share some with you, Pa.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThank you. As you should. After all, it\u2019s your fault I had Hop Sing get \u201cMissy Teacher\u2019s\u201d room ready.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam chuckled, then followed his father to the sitting area. Hoss entered the house with Adam\u2019s valise just as Hop Sing brought a tray of lemonade and cookies from the kitchen. Adam enjoyed a lazy afternoon visit with his father and brother. Shortly before Pa expected Candy to return with Joe, Adam excused himself and carried his valise to his room.<\/span><\/p>\n

As Hop Sing said, the room hadn\u2019t been changed in the years since Adam\u2019s departure. Adam opened the window to allow the summer breeze in, and to air out the stuffiness that spoke of a space long unoccupied. It took him no more than a minute to unpack. He opened his bureau drawers one by one, seeing the clothes he\u2019d left behind. He changed out of his traveling suit then \u2013 the gray dress trousers, gray suit coat, white shirt, and black string tie he\u2019d worn. He found a pair of familiar black pants and a black shirt to put on in their place. He was surprised the pants still fit as comfortably as they did. Adam would have sworn he\u2019d put on a few pounds since taking the job at the institute.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

When Adam returned to the main floor, he took a slow tour of the room, savoring everything from pictures, to books, to furniture, to the Indian blanket that still hung on the banister. It was while he stood in front of Pa\u2019s desk running two fingers over the smooth wood, that Candy and Joe entered the house.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam had wanted his reunion with Joe to be just as exuberant and heartfelt as his reunion with Pa and Hoss. Nonetheless, he wasn\u2019t surprised when it didn\u2019t turn out that way. First of all, Joe had told their father numerous times not to send for a teacher. And second of all, even when Joe discovered the teacher was his brother, Adam understood that, given the circumstances, it was difficult for Joe to be welcoming of unexpected visitors.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam stood up from the settee now, ready to make another attempt at a reunion with his youngest brother. He broke the heavy silence that had prevailed in the room since Joe tumbled up the stairs.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll go talk to Joe. See if he\u2019ll come down and eat supper.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss turned to look at Adam as Pa asked, \u201cYou think that\u2019s a good idea?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI do,\u201d Adam nodded. \u201cHe can\u2019t sit in his room and brood forever.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam. . .\u201d Pa\u2019s voice warned that he wasn\u2019t up to hearing the kind of heated exchange his oldest and youngest had engaged in at times during years past.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPa, trust me. I know how to handle Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI do trust you. It\u2019s just that. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat what, Pa?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019ve been gone a long time. You don\u2019t. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t have the right to push my way back into Joe\u2019s life? Is that what you were going to say?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Pa gave a reluctant, \u201cYes.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not going to push. I\u2019m going to teach. I came here to teach Joe, Pa, not to fight with him. Believe me, I saw the gray in his hair.\u201d Adam smiled. \u201cWhile I\u2019ll always think of Joe as my kid brother, I realize it\u2019s been a lot of years since he was a kid, and that I\u2019ve got to treat him with the same respect I\u2019d want if our positions were reversed. Besides,\u201d the man added as he paused with a foot on the first step, \u201cI also noticed the muscles that little scamp has packed onto his chest and shoulders since I left. If I\u2019m not careful, he\u2019ll knock me right through a wall.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHe will,\u201d Hoss agreed. \u201cHeck, Adam, even when Joe was a lot scrawnier, that never kept him from takin\u2019 a swing at ya\u2019 if ya\u2019 got him riled.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, it didn\u2019t,\u201d Adam said to Hoss, but then quickly assured his father, \u201cbut don\u2019t worry, no fist fights. I\u2019m too old to be on the receiving end of Joe\u2019s temper.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI would hope you\u2019re both too old for that kind of malarkey.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam laughed. \u201cOh, come on, Pa. Joe and I tearing up this room every so often as we tossed each other over furniture was kind of fun.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe fun for you and Joseph, but not fun for Hoss and me when we had to try and pull you two apart.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, no need to worry about pulling us apart this time around, I promise. I\u2019m just going to talk to Joe. Just going to try and convince him that I can help him \u2013 teach him \u2013 if he\u2019ll only let me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Pa\u2019s, \u201cI hope Joe agrees to that,\u201d sounded flat, and without any real conviction. The look on Hoss\u2019s face mirrored Pa\u2019s certainty that Adam would fail.<\/span><\/p>\n

But Adam had ridden onto the Ponderosa determined not to fail, and no amount of stubbornness on Joe\u2019s part was going to change that.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 6<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Joe sat on the edge of the bed, ignoring the knock on his door. The \u201crap rap rap\u201d sounded again with more persistence.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGo away, Adam.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI said go away.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Despite the directive, the door opened. Joe scowled.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSomethin\u2019 wrong with your hearing?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I hear just fine. As do you, evidently, since you could tell those were my footsteps in the hall, and not Pa\u2019s or Hoss\u2019s.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDid you come up here just to prove how smart you are, or do you get enjoyment outta barging into rooms you\u2019ve been told not to enter?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t come up here to prove anything, Joe, and as for barging in. . .I\u2019m sorry. I wanted to talk to you for a few minutes.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAbout what?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, first of all, how about just to say hello, and that I\u2019m glad to see you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cFine. Now that you\u2019ve gotten that outta the way, you can leave.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLeave?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah. Go to your own room. Or go back downstairs. Or go back to Boston, for all I care.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat if I\u2019m not ready to go back to Boston?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen that\u2019s your choice. Just don\u2019t bother me while you\u2019re here.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Silence cloaked the room. Joe could picture Adam studying him while considering what he\u2019d say next.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, there\u2019re things I can show you. . .teach you, if you\u2019ll only let me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh, so now Adam Cartwright is the savior of the blind, is that it?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam Cartwright isn\u2019t anyone\u2019s savior, believe me. But he is your brother, and he\u2019d like to help you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI came a long way and–\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t ask you to. Besides, you weren\u2019t interested in coming home before.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBefore? Before what?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBefore I went on display like some kind of side-show freak.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s not true.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat? That you weren\u2019t interested in coming home, or that I\u2019m a freak?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s not that I wasn\u2019t interested, it\u2019s just that it wasn\u2019t. . .it wasn\u2019t possible. And I don\u2019t think you\u2019re a freak.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell I do, and that\u2019s all that matters.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Again, silence prevailed between the brothers. Men\u2019s laughter drifted in through the open window, followed by the clang of a horseshoe striking a metal stake. It was a game meant to pass time, and in Joe\u2019s opinion, not all that exciting. But it was strange what simple things you longed to be able to do when you could no longer see.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI can teach you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe turned his face from the window.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHorseshoes. I can teach you how to play horseshoes.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe didn\u2019t know which made him more furious \u2013 Adam\u2019s insistence that he could teach him things, or that he\u2019d so easily discerned what Joe was thinking.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNow that\u2019ll sure make Pa proud.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHey, Adam, then you really could get me hired by a freak show. You could bill me as the blind, horseshoe-playing man.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIf nothing else, it\u2019ll get me outta this room and give me a way to earn a living so I don\u2019t have to be Pa\u2019s charity case.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re not Pa\u2019s charity case, you\u2019re his son.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s not what people will say.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat people?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo one in particular. Just people.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve never known you to worry about what people say.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019ve been gone a long time. Maybe I do now.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam chuckled. \u201cEven thrusting your chin out at me like that in defiance, won\u2019t make me believe Joe Cartwright has changed so much that he loses sleep over the opinions of others.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLook, Adam, what you believe or don\u2019t believe, doesn\u2019t matter to me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIf you really are concerned about people thinking you\u2019re Pa\u2019s charity case, let me teach–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo! How many ways do I have to say it? No, Adam! Now get outta here! Go!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

A heavy sigh was accompanied by footsteps heading toward the door. The footsteps paused. Even without the ability to see his brother, Joe knew Adam had turned to look at him.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHop Sing\u2019s got supper waiting.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not hungry.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cFor Pa\u2019s sake, could you at least try and eat?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot tonight. I just wanna be left alone.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam was quiet a few seconds, then made a soft confession.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m no stranger to what you\u2019re feeling, Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo?\u201d Joe didn\u2019t attempt to keep the bitterness from his tone. \u201cDoes that mean you\u2019re blind too?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

There was a long hesitation, as though Adam wanted to say far more than what he finally settled on.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo. . . .No, I\u2019m not.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen you are a stranger to what I\u2019m feeling. You have no idea what I\u2019m feeling, and don\u2019t you dare come in this room and try and tell me otherwise.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe expected to be inundated with Adam Cartwright words-of-wisdom, and was therefore glad when he received none. Adam\u2019s footsteps moved toward the doorway again. He paused just long enough to say, \u201cOh, and by the way. I don\u2019t have a secretary.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s brow furrowed with puzzlement, but before he could reply, the door closed and Adam was gone.<\/span><\/p>\n

Long after Adam left, Joe sat wondering why the solitude he claimed to crave brought him no comfort, and how a man could feel so alone when his family was gathered around the dining room table just one floor below.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 7<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Adam suspected Joe\u2019s late arrival at the breakfast table on Sunday morning had nothing to do with oversleeping, and everything to do with Joe assuming his family had left for church. But since Joe couldn\u2019t see a clock, his timing was off. If he\u2019d waited another fifteen minutes, he might have found himself alone in the house, save for Hop Sing. Instead, Hoss was outside getting the buggy ready, while Pa and Adam sat at the table sipping coffee.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe groped his way down the stairs. His uncoordinated movements were painful for Adam to watch. In less than ten minutes, Adam could show his little brother a safe and confident way to traverse the stairs, if only Joe would let him.<\/span><\/p>\n

Pa exchanged glances with Adam. There\u2019d been a lull in their conversation, which was likely why Joe didn\u2019t realize they were still in the house. Pa waited until Joe was on the landing, to say, \u201cGood morning, Joseph.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh. . .uh. . .morning, Pa.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMorning, Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam received nothing more than a curt, \u201cAdam,\u201d in response to his greeting.<\/span><\/p>\n

As Pa stood to assist Joe, Adam shook his head. Pa cocked a questioning eyebrow. Adam nodded toward his father\u2019s chair, indicating that he\u2019d like the man to sit back down. Pa reluctantly did so. Adam then turned his attention to Joe, who was headed for the blue chair. Joe waved his arms in front of him in what Adam knew was an ineffective way for a blind man to navigate a room. He was proven correct, when Joe collided with the chair. True to Joe\u2019s stubborn nature, he wouldn\u2019t ask for help. He righted himself, and then kept walking.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, your shins are about to make contact with the coffee table.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Regardless of how Joe felt about Adam\u2019s presence, he stopped.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTake three steps backwards, and then seven steps to your left.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe hesitated.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIf you take three steps back, and seven steps left, you\u2019ll be in the open space behind the settee.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

The explanation seemed to help Joe reach the decision to do as Adam instructed.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam realized the added explanation had probably made his directive sound less like an order. He filed that in the back of his mind for future reference. Joe never had taken well to being bossed around \u2013 especially when the person doing the bossing was his oldest brother.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNow put your right hand out at waist level.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause if you do, you\u2019ll feel the edge of the table behind the settee.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Again, Joe hesitated, as though the last thing he wanted to do was take orders from Adam. But Joe also must have recognized that Adam\u2019s verbal guidance was allowing him the independence he so badly wanted.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cRun the back of your hand across the table as you walk forward. No, not the front of your hand, the back. It\u2019s safer that way.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe couldn\u2019t keep his curiosity in-check. \u201cHow come?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause if you encounter a nail, or other sharp object, you\u2019re not as likely to pierce your skin as you are if you use your palm.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh. . .okay.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhen you come to the end of the table, keep your hand at waist level, palm inward just like you have it now. You\u2019ll take approximately eight steps, and then feel the corner of the dining room table.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Once Joe reached the table, he was able to get to his chair and sit down without further instructions. If this small feat made him happy, he worked hard at not revealing that to Adam.<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam frowned as his father filled a plate for Joe. This was another habit he would have to break Pa of.<\/span><\/p>\n

Pa placed the plate in front of Joe.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cScrambled eggs at twelve o\u2019clock, son. Bacon at nine, and fried potatoes at three.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThanks, Pa.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam watched his father pour coffee for Joe next; another task Joe could be doing for himself.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCoffee\u2019s at the top of your plate.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThanks.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re welcome. Are you coming to church with us this morning?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUh. . .no. No, Pa, I\u2019m not.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Based on things Adam was told by Pa and Hoss the previous afternoon, he knew Joe hadn\u2019t attended church, or been in Virginia City at all, since the explosion.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSally Morris will ask after you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe shrugged.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIs there a message you\u2019d like me to give her?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo. No message.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s no message, Pa.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Pa\u2019s eyes remained on Joe. Adam wished his brother could see the pain those eyes held, and the way exhaustion and worry were taking their toll on Pa.<\/span><\/p>\n

Pa finished his coffee, set the cup on its saucer, and looked at Adam.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cReady to go?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou know, Pa, I\u2019m pretty tired from my trip. I think I\u2019ll stay here this morning.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam almost laughed out loud at the scowl on Joe\u2019s face.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t need a babysitter.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI never said you did. As a matter of fact, I didn\u2019t say anything about you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe at least had the good grace to blush a little.<\/span><\/p>\n

Pa didn\u2019t intercede on behalf of either of his sons. He must have decided they could fight it out on their own; or, he surmised what Adam hoped to accomplish if he were able to spend some time alone with Joe.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll see you boys later, then.\u201d Pa stood and walked from the dining area. \u201cI\u2019d better get out to the buggy, or Hoss\u2019ll wonder what\u2019s happened to me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBye, Pa,\u201d Adam said.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s, \u201cBye,\u201d was subdued, and devoid of the cheerfulness his older brother\u2019s had contained. As though the prospect of being alone with Adam was worse than the thought of being seen in public. For a few moments, Adam wondered if Joe would change his mind about going to church.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Pa must have wondered the same thing, because he stood behind the settee, his gaze lingering on his youngest son. When Joe said nothing more, Pa placed his hat on his head, turned, and headed out the front door.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe ate with the kind of speed that said he was in a rush to escape his older brother\u2019s presence. Adam cast about for something to say. If he didn\u2019t make conversation, Joe would find an excuse to return to his room as soon as he finished his breakfast.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt sure is nice to be home.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe didn\u2019t answer, but by the way his eyes were drawn to the direction Adam\u2019s voice was coming from, Adam knew he had his brother\u2019s attention.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAll three of you look good.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWish I could return the compliment, but as you\u2019ve already figured out, I\u2019m not seeing much of anything these days.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Six years ago, Adam wouldn\u2019t have had the fortitude to withstand Joe\u2019s bitterness, but life had taught him a few hard lessons since he\u2019d been gone, and two of the things he\u2019d learned from those lessons was patience and empathy. He plowed forward, pretending he hadn\u2019t heard Joe.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI have to confess I was a little surprised by the gray in your hair, and the way you\u2019ve filled out in the shoulders and chest. A few years on down the road, and you\u2019ll be the one amongst us who looks the most like Pa.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Being compared to Pa made Joe smile a little. \u201cNo.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cEveryone\u2019s always said I look like my mother.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou did when you were younger, and you still do to some extent. But I\u2019m seeing a good deal of Pa in you, too.\u201d Adam smiled. \u201cMaybe it\u2019s just because I\u2019ve been gone awhile.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe. Or maybe you need glasses.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Despite the lack of humor in Joe\u2019s tone, Adam chuckled. \u201cMaybe I do.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam moved the conversation along, talking about the changes he\u2019d observed in Virginia City, and then on the Ponderosa during his ride to the ranch house the previous day. Joe\u2019s answers were short when he answered at all, but at least he seemed to have forgotten he was in a hurry to leave the table.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Casually, Adam stated, \u201cI\u2019ll be here for a few days yet. Maybe the Cartwright brothers can get some fishing in before I go back to Boston. What do you think?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUh. . .sure. Yeah. I suppose we could. When\u2019re you leaving?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cProbably at the end of the week. I arranged to be gone from the institute for at least a month, but if you don\u2019t have a need for me. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t have a need for you. Doc Martin says I\u2019m gonna get my eyesight back.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh. . .I didn\u2019t realize that. Pa didn\u2019t mention it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, he should have. Might have saved you a trip.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, it might have. But overall, it doesn\u2019t matter. I was long overdue for a visit home, wouldn\u2019t you say?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe shrugged, but Adam could detect the hurt in his response. \u201cYour life is in Boston now.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA part of my life is there, yes. But a part of it\u2019s still here on the Ponderosa too, Joe. The part that\u2019ll always be connected to you, and Pa, and Hoss.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The conversation paused, as though Joe was absorbing Adam\u2019s words and deciding how he wanted to respond to them.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPa\u2019s missed you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve missed him, too. And Hoss and you, as well.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIf you\u2019ve missed all of us, how come you never came home for a visit?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBoston isn\u2019t exactly just a town or two away, you know.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI might be blind, but I\u2019m not stupid. I know how far Boston is.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen you know it\u2019s not a trip a person makes on the spur of the moment. Besides, you never came to visit me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI wasn\u2019t invited.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Touch\u00e9, little brother. Touch\u00e9.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen I\u2019ve been negligent in telling you that you\u2019re welcome any time. Would you like to come stay with me for awhile?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh. . .well, obviously my invitation is a little late, but that doesn\u2019t make it any less sincere. I really would like you to come for a visit.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know. What I meant was, not right now. Someday, when I have my sight back, then. . .yeah, maybe. I might like to see Boston. Hoss too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam smiled while keeping the disappointment out of his voice. He\u2019d thought if he could get Joe away from the Ponderosa, then Joe might be more receptive to learning.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBoth you and Hoss are always welcome. Just let me know you\u2019re coming, and I\u2019ll have Mrs. O\u2019Connell get the guestrooms ready.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMrs. O\u2019Connell?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMy housekeeper. A female, Irish version of Hop Sing.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

That got a chuckle out of Joe.<\/span><\/p>\n

Taking advantage of his brother\u2019s good humor, Adam held out his coffee cup.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, the coffee pot\u2019s to your left at ten o\u2019clock. Would you mind pouring me a cup?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Before Joe had the chance to say no, Adam placed his cup in Joe\u2019s right hand.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI. . .you\u2019d better do it. I might spill it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh yeah, that\u2019s right, you might. . .unless. . .\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUnless what?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI can show you a way to do it if you want me to.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat way?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam leaned across the table and gently manipulated the fingers of Joe\u2019s right hand around the delicate china cup.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHere. Like this. Place your index finger just inside the rim of the cup. You\u2019ll know when to stop pouring.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah,\u201d Joe smiled, \u201cguess I will.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI hope your hands are clean.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe smirked at his brother. \u201cThat\u2019s the chance you took when you asked me to pour.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA request I\u2019m regretting now that I\u2019ve given it a second thought.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe laughed. Adam sat back in his chair, enjoying the sound. That was one thing that hadn\u2019t changed in the years since he\u2019d left. Joe still possessed that distinctive cackle Adam could have picked out of any crowd, no matter how dense.<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam reached out to take the cup Joe held toward him.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNow I can show you another method with your own cup.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOne that doesn\u2019t involve my finger?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGood. I don\u2019t mind getting your coffee dirty, but I don\u2019t wanna drink my own that way.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cVery funny.\u201d Adam wished Pa were present to witness this exchange. It would do him a world of good to hear Joe laughing and joking. \u201cNow this might be somewhat difficult for you, because you\u2019ll have to keep your mouth shut for a few seconds and listen.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNow who\u2019s being funny?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s good for the goose is good for the gander, little brother,\u201d Adam teased. \u201cListen as you pour this time. The sound will be fairly noticeable when you first begin, but as the cup gets fuller, the sound will diminish. When the cup is about three quarters of the way full, the sound will stop altogether.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s eyebrows knit together with concentration as he poured. The delight on his face was impossible to miss.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHey, it really works.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou thought I was lying to you?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell. . .no, but I figured you\u2019d think it was justified payback for past deeds on my part if the coffee ran over the cup.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt would be justified payback, but when payback comes, it won\u2019t be at the risk of your hand getting burnt.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSo payback is coming, huh?\u201d Joe asked with a twinkle in his eyes as he set the coffee pot on the table.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHard to say. Don\u2019t know if I\u2019ll be here long enough to pull anything off, but I wouldn\u2019t let my guard down if I were you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUm. . .about that. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh no. Don\u2019t try and tell me you don\u2019t deserve whatever prank I dream up. Need I remind you about the Abigail Jones fiasco, and the time you–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo,\u201d Joe smiled slightly, \u201cyou don\u2019t need to remind me. But what I meant\u00a0<\/span>
\n was. . .you. . .uh. . .you said something earlier about being able to stay a month.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes. Even longer if necessary.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know I\u2019ll have my sight back by then, but Pa. . .Pa would probably like it if you stayed longer than just \u2018til the end of this week. I mean, it\u2019s not fair of me to chase you off. For Pa\u2019s sake and all.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s true, I suppose.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd if you would decide to stay awhile, I guess. . .well, if you still wanna teach me some things, I\u2019d probably find them helpful until I can see again.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHmmm. . . .\u201d Adam nodded. \u201cYou make a good point I can\u2019t argue.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSo. . .uh. . .would you?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWould I what?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe worried his lower lip a moment.<\/span><\/p>\n

Come on, Joe. Ask me. Set your pride aside and ask me.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWould you stay and. . .and in-between visiting with Pa and Hoss, show me a few things maybe?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s no maybe about it. Of course I\u2019ll stay. And yes, in-between visiting with Pa and Hoss, I can probably find time to show you some things \u2013 if you\u2019re willing to let me be your teacher, that is.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m willing.\u201d Joe gave a teasing smile. \u201cAs long as I don\u2019t have to call you Mr. Cartwright , Sir, or Headmaster.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam laughed. \u201cAnd here I was thinking Headmaster Cartwright as spoken by my youngest brother had a nice ring to it, but if you insist. . .all right. I guess for you, Adam will do just fine.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s smile faded a bit. Adam knew this hadn\u2019t been an easy decision for him. By saying he was willing to be taught, Joe was taking the first small step toward acknowledging he\u2019d never see again, even though he\u2019d likely deny it if asked.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThanks, Adam.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re welcome.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd about yesterday. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat about yesterday?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Apologies had never been easy for Joe to extend to his oldest brother, any more than the reverse was true. As Pa often said, brotherly love existed between Adam and Joe, but sometimes their relationship was \u201cprickly.\u201d Or better put by Hoss, \u201cThem two\u2019s got more thorns between \u2018em than a porcupine\u2019s got quills.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

But what Adam received from his brother that morning, meant far more than any apology could have.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI. . .I should have told you that I\u2019m glad you\u2019re home.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou should only tell me that if you mean it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI do. I do mean it. I\u2019m glad you came home, Adam.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd I\u2019m glad to be home.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOnly next time. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNext time what?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGive a guy a little warning before you just show up outta the blue. My shins can\u2019t take any more of those stupid stairs.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam laughed again, then laughed harder when Hop Sing came out of the kitchen shouting, \u201cMr. Adam an\u2019 Little Joe, yack yack yack like old ladies at hen party! Go outside an\u2019 yack yack yack. Hop Sing need clear table before Mr. Hoss come home church an\u2019 want know where lunch is!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam walked around the table and lifted his brother by one arm.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCome on, Joe. I think that\u2019s our signal to make ourselves scarce.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSure sounds like it to me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

~ ~ ~<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

The smell of roast beef and warm apple pie was wafting out of the house when Pa and Hoss arrived home three hours later. As the buggy rounded the corner of the barn, Adam saw the astonishment on their faces at the sight of Joe playing horseshoes with Candy. It wasn\u2019t nearly the miracle Pa and Hoss thought \u2013 just a rope Joe could use as a guide as he walked back and forth between the two stakes, along with a liberal dose of verbal confidence offered by his oldest brother. But as Adam told them after lunch had been eaten, and Joe and Candy returned outside to their game, it was a start.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA start I\u2019m grateful for,\u201d Pa said in a tone thick with emotion. \u201cThank you, Adam. Thank you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam stood, clapping his father on the back as he rounded the table.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCome on, Pa. I think it\u2019s time for a family horseshoe challenge. You and me, against Hoss and Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss followed his father and brother to the door. \u201cNow there\u2019s a challenge I ain\u2019t refusin\u2019.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Candy and Joe finished their game, then Candy said he needed to go check on some livestock. Whether that was true or not, Adam didn\u2019t know. Once again, he was grateful for the foreman\u2019s perceptiveness, and his willingness to give the Cartwrights time alone together.<\/span><\/p>\n

The only thing that marred the afternoon was the arrival of the Jensen boy with Adam\u2019s luggage. Joe fled to the house with a stumbling gait, when he heard a buckboard coming around the barn. Pa called after him, but Adam shook his head while placing his hand on Pa\u2019s shoulder.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLet him be, Pa. Remember what I said. Today was just a start. We have a lot of days ahead of us yet. Give him time. Little by little, he\u2019ll get there on his own.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Pa looked skeptical. \u201cIf you say so.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI do. Now, while I help Hoss with my luggage, how about if you go in the house and break the news to Hop Sing that I promised my delivery boy a glass of lemonade and some cookies.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLeaving your father with the dirty work, is that it?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYep, that\u2019s it,\u201d Adam agreed with a grin.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam followed Hoss into the house with a suitcase in hand. Last night, he\u2019d thought this visit would be so short that there\u2019d be no need to unpack. Now, he looked forward to putting his clothes away, getting his teaching materials out, and settling in for an extended stay. The only drawback to that stay \u2013 he already missed Laddie terribly. But for whatever period of time Joe needed him, letters back and forth between the Ponderosa and Boston would have to soothe the longings of the heart.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 8<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

In the weeks following Adam\u2019s arrival, Joe barely had a moment to relax between eight in the morning and four in the afternoon \u2013 the hours Adam declared \u201cschool\u201d was in session Monday through Friday, save for a one-hour lunch break at noon. Joe hadn\u2019t studied with this intensity during all of the years he\u2019d attended Virginia City\u2019s schoolhouse. When he\u2019d said as much to Adam, Adam droned, \u201cThat doesn\u2019t surprise me,\u201d in a tone that held just the right amount of brotherly teasing.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Learning to read and write Braille took up most of Joe\u2019s time and concentration. He often asked Adam to continue working with him after supper. In a reversal of roles, it was Adam who put a halt to the learning whenever he recognized Joe needed to set the books aside and have some fun. When Saturdays arrived, it was also Adam who rounded up Hoss and Joe for fishing excursions, or journeys over Ponderosa land on horseback. Sometimes Pa came along, while other times he said he had things to do and remained at the house. Pa wasn\u2019t fooling his sons. They knew this was his way of giving them time together as brothers, after too many years apart.<\/span><\/p>\n

Braille opened the world to Joe in a way he never imagined it could. Adam had books written in Braille, a deck of Braille cards, and a set of Braille dominos and Braille checkers. The cards, dominos, and checkers were also marked in the traditional manner for sighted people, which enabled Hoss and Joe to resume playing the after-supper games they\u2019d indulged in since boyhood.<\/span><\/p>\n

Other lessons for Joe included learning to saddle Cochise, fill his own plate, shave his face without assistance, make his bed, and fold and put away his clothes. With Adam\u2019s help, Joe also learned to sort his clothing by color and type, so that he no longer worried about making a fool of himself by putting on a pair of trousers meant for church, with a shirt meant for ranch work. He also learned to safely navigate both floors of the house, as well as the stairway. Once Joe accomplished those feats, he learned to traverse the wide-open space of the ranch yard, and then the interior of the out buildings. Joe couldn\u2019t count the number of times he\u2019d heard Adam command, \u201cHead up, Joe. Up, just as though you\u2019re looking someone in the eye. Keep your right arm bent and in front of your face. If you bump into a wall, it\u2019ll hurt a lot less if your arm takes the brunt of it, as opposed to your nose. Palm inward on that left hand. Inward. Remember, it\u2019s the back of that hand you run over walls and furniture, not the front.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Exactly when these new skills became second nature and he no longer needed Adam\u2019s reminders, Joe wasn\u2019t sure. All he knew was suddenly it seemed like he\u2019d been blind for years. That thought scared him, because it forced him to accept that more time was passing in which his eyesight showed no sign of returning. It forced Joe to acknowledge that, in all likelihood, this is what the future held for him. Braille books, Braille checkers, Braille dominos, and everything surrounded by darkness. Everything he\u2019d known for as long as he could remember \u2013 his bedroom, the comforting glow of the fireplace in the great room on a cold winter\u2019s evening, the meadows, streams, lakes, grazing lands, and timberlands of the Ponderosa, and his father\u2019s face \u2013 would be only memories in his mind\u2019s eye. Memories that Joe feared would diminish as the years went on, until he couldn\u2019t recall what Pa looked like at all, or how Hoss cocked his head, scrunched up his nose, and pursed his mouth when trying to figure out if Joe was pulling his leg about something, or telling him the truth.<\/span><\/p>\n

Despite Adam\u2019s lessons and the hope they brought Joe that he could eventually live a semi-independent life, depression remained a companion hidden in the shadows, and creeping over him whenever he dwelled on all that he might never see or do again. Before the explosion, Joe thought his entire future was ahead of him. A future that included a wife and children. A future that included running the Ponderosa with Hoss, long after Pa had lived to be a ripe old age, and then was no longer with them. Now, Joe set all those dreams aside permanently. There would be no wife, no children, and no ability on his part to be a business partner in much of anything, let alone this ranch that encompassed one thousand square-miles.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

During these bouts of depression, Joe was an \u201cornery little cuss,\u201d as Hoss mumbled on a few occasions. It was then that Joe and Adam would invariably have words over something Adam wanted Joe to do, that Joe wanted no part of. And the thing Adam wanted Joe to do the most lately, that Joe in turn resisted the strongest, was taking a trip into Virginia City. Adam brought it up again during that afternoon\u2019s Braille lesson.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHow many times do I have to tell you?\u201d Joe asked, as he sat at the dining room table with his brother. \u201cI don\u2019t wanna be stared at.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou can\u2019t see. Therefore, you won\u2019t know if anyone\u2019s staring at you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe ignored Adam\u2019s attempt at humor.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll know.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHow?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause I will. I don\u2019t have to be able to see in order to sense what\u2019s going on around me. You\u2019re the one who keeps telling me that, in case you need to be reminded.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t need to be reminded. But you can\u2019t hide out here on the Ponderosa forever.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not hiding!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLooks to me like you are.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell I didn\u2019t ask what it looked like to you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI realize that, but a trip to town is part of your schooling. You need to learn to navigate in all types of situations, Joe, and with all types of distractions. That includes traveling a crowded sidewalk, making your way through a store on a busy afternoon, and stepping out of the way when you hear a stagecoach coming down the street.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo I don\u2019t.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, you do. So on Saturday, we\u2019ll go into town together and–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not going anywhere.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes you are.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo I\u2019m not.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLook, I\u2019m not the kid brother you can boss around any more.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI realize that, and I\u2019m not bossing. But you were the one who asked me to be your teacher, and as your teacher, I\u2019m telling you a trip to town is part of learning to cope with being blind.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell maybe I don\u2019t wanna cope! Maybe I don\u2019t give a damn about coping!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou may not give a damn about it, but one way or another, you have to come to terms with it. And that means putting up with people staring at you, pointing at you, and probably even whispering behind your back as you walk away.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIf that\u2019s what coping\u2019s all about, I don\u2019t want any part of it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, you\u2019re not the only person in this family who\u2019s been stared at, you know.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s that supposed to mean?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUm. . .nothing. Nothing.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe scowled. \u201cThat\u2019s what I thought. Nothing. Because you don\u2019t know. Because you\u2019re \u201cPerfect Adam,\u201d and you always have been.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not perfect.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSure you are. The Cartwright brother who\u2019s always had all the right answers. The Cartwright brother Pa depended on to help him make the important decisions for the Ponderosa, until you weren\u2019t here any more, and Pa figured out Hoss and I aren\u2019t as dumb as he thought.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThe Cartwright brother who\u2019s never made mistakes, never made a bad decision, and never made a fool of himself. So yeah, Adam, it\u2019s easy for you to tell me I should go into town, because you\u2019ve never been stared at or pointed at a day in your life! Until you know how that feels, don\u2019t tell me what I have to do!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe flew from his chair and stumbled for the front door, angry at how difficult his sightless eyes made fleeing from a situation he no longer wanted to be a part of. He expected his brother to follow him, but he didn\u2019t hear any footsteps behind him, nor did Adam come outside and try to prevent him from leaving on Cochise. That was just fine with Joe. He didn\u2019t need a babysitter, or a teacher for that matter. Maybe it was time for Adam to go back to Boston. Maybe it was time for Adam to go back to his life, and let Pa, Hoss, and Joe, return to theirs.<\/span><\/p>\n

But what exactly is my life now?<\/em>\u00a0Joe wondered as he rode wherever Cochise took him.\u00a0What can I do that\u2019ll ever be of any use around here? Of any use to Pa, or to Hoss?<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Being on Cochise without someone riding beside him was probably reckless, but Joe didn\u2019t care. Cochise knew the way home, and he wouldn\u2019t let anything happen to Joe. Besides, it felt good to be outside alone, traveling on Cochise like he used to back when he\u2019d taken his eyesight for granted.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe trusted Cochise to take him wherever the horse was inclined to. By the warmth on his face, Joe knew they were headed west, but their exact location was a mystery. Joe listened hard for the sound of water lapping against rocks, or the sound of men working cattle, or breaking horses, but he didn\u2019t hear any of the things that might have oriented him to his whereabouts. Still, it didn\u2019t bother him not to be able to discern his location. When Cochise crossed from uneven terrain to a smooth surface, Joe didn\u2019t urge the horse to alter his path until he heard a buggy. That\u2019s when he realized they were on Virginia City Road.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe gave the reins an urgent tug to the right. \u201cCome on, Cooch.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe!\u201d A woman\u2019s voice called from in front of Joe. \u201cJoe, wait! Joe!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCome on, Cochise, let\u2019s–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, wait! Please!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Evidently, Cochise was as easily swayed by a pretty face as his master, because he ignored Joe\u2019s command, and stood in the middle of the road waiting for the buggy to reach them.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe! It\u2019s so nice to see you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe pulled the brim of his hat low on his forehead, and \u201clooked\u201d down at his saddle horn.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUh. . .hi, Sally. Nice to see you, too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI ask your father about you every Sunday at church.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah. . .um. . .he\u2019s mentioned that.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI hope you\u2019re feeling better.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI am. I\u2019m feelin\u2019 real good.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

By the silence that followed, Joe suspected the woman was studying him, trying to determine if any signs of injury remained.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m glad to hear that, and glad I ran across you, as well. I was just on my way to your house.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou were?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI made you some strawberry jam as a get-well present.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh. . .thanks. Thanks a lot.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe hoped she wasn\u2019t holding the jam out to him, expecting him to get off of Cochise and come retrieve it. The awkward silence that followed told Joe that\u2019s exactly what Sally was doing. She rushed to fill that silence.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHere, let me bring this to. . .Whoops!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWha. . .what\u2019s wrong?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve got my skirts caught in the wheel. No, Bonnie, don\u2019t! Whoa! Don\u2019t move! Whoa, Bonnie! Whoa!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe slid off Cochise and hurried to Sally\u2019s side. In his haste, he forgot Adam\u2019s instructions on how to travel an open area, and instead, fell back into the old habit of waving his hands in front of him.<\/span><\/p>\n

There was something in Sally\u2019s tone that indicated she\u2019d seen Joe\u2019s actions and knew what they meant. Her, \u201cThank you,\u201d when he\u2019d gotten Bonnie halted, was hesitant and soft, and held embarrassment for him. Sally released her skirts without Joe\u2019s help, then placed the jar in his hands.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHere, Joe. The jam\u2019s right–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

He shoved it back at her. \u201cI don\u2019t want it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut I made it for you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, why? Why was it so important to come and see me? So you can tell your girlfriends the rumors they\u2019ve heard are true? That Joe Cartwright really is a helpless blind man who can\u2019t even assist a woman in getting out of a buggy.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe. . .no. No, I–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJust go, Sally. Go, and take this with you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe shoved the jar at the woman again, forcing it into her hands. He turned, stumbling for Cochise, while Sally called his name. Her presence made it impossible for Joe to concentrate on climbing into the saddle. Cochise did a two-step away from his master, skittish over the sudden yelling and upset.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGo! Go I said!\u201d Joe hollered, knowing he\u2019d never manage to get on Cochise with Sally staring at him. \u201cGet outta here!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe heard Sally\u2019s cry of surprise at his cruelty, followed by a choked sob. Then he heard the buggy being turned around, and Bonnie urged to travel at a clipped pace toward the Morris homestead. At any other time, Joe would have felt like a cad for treating a woman so poorly, especially one he\u2019d been smitten with. But not today. He hadn\u2019t asked Sally to call on him. He hadn\u2019t asked her to make him jam. And most of all, he hadn\u2019t asked for her pity.<\/span><\/p>\n

As Joe struggled to climb back on Cochise while the horse turned nervous circles, he heard riders coming. The sound made Joe even more desperate to get on his mount and flee this open area. But desperation wasn\u2019t a blind man\u2019s friend, as Joe was finding out. The more urgent he became, the less cooperative Cochise became. With one foot caught in a stirrup, Joe was forced to dance in a circle with Cochise like some sissy fella who\u2019d never sat a horse.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe! Joe, stop!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, do as Hoss says and quit moving! Grab the reins and pull back! They\u2019re directly above your left hand!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Worse even than Sally Morris seeing him in this predicament, was having Adam and Hoss see him while riding to his rescue.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe didn\u2019t know who got a hold of Cochise\u2019s reins, but an educated guess told him it was Hoss.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou okay, little brother?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m fine.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

A mammoth hand cupped his upper arm and started to lift. Joe jerked away.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI can do it myself!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t much look like it to me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell I can! Just hold onto him for me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhatever you say, Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s voice followed Hoss\u2019s.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThe saddle horn is–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know where the saddle horn is!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe didn\u2019t need his eyesight to know his brothers exchanged glances.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cQuit looking at each other like that!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLike what?\u201d Adam asked.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLike you\u2019re both so smart, and I\u2019m so stupid.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019re not looking at–\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes you are!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam sighed, but didn\u2019t say anything. Hoss evidently knew better than to contribute his two cents worth at this moment, as well, because all he said was, \u201cCome on. Let\u2019s go home.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Home to what, Joe wanted to ask. More Braille lessons? More games of Braille checkers? More lessons on learning how to live with being blind? Live? This wasn\u2019t living. This was death as far as Joe was concerned. A slow, painful death, that had stripped every ounce of dignity from him, and made him so dependant on others that he couldn\u2019t even get home by himself on the back of a horse he\u2019d ridden since childhood.<\/span><\/p>\n

As he rode flanked by his silent brothers, as though he was once again an errant schoolboy being taken home to Pa for punishment, Joe wished the explosion had killed him. In his opinion, death couldn\u2019t be any worse than spending the rest of his life in darkness.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

And when all was said and done, it might even turn out to be better.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 9<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Supper was a subdued affair. Not since the first evening Adam arrived, had Joe refused to come downstairs and eat, but this evening he did. By the worry on Pa\u2019s face, and how little he ate, Adam knew this step backwards on Joe\u2019s part was gnawing at their father\u2019s insides.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry, Pa. It was my fault. I shouldn\u2019t have been so insistent about Joe taking a trip with me into Virginia City.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWould you have insisted with any other student?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell. . .yes. Yes, I would have.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen don\u2019t apologize. You\u2019ve done nothing wrong.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen allow me to apologize for handling it the wrong way.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHandling it the wrong way?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam smiled with chagrin. \u201cJoe was right. He\u2019s not the kid brother I can boss around any more.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMeaning?\u201d Pa questioned.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMeaning, Joe and I are apparently still bound to butt heads every so often over our birth order.\u201d At the confusion on his father\u2019s face, Adam explained, \u201cHe still thinks being the oldest is an enviable position he missed out on, and I still think being the youngest wouldn\u2019t be so bad on most days.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, no matter how ya\u2019 look at it, I\u2019m the brother who\u2019s always caught in the middle between ya\u2019 two ornery cusses.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat you are, Hoss,\u201d Adam laughed. \u201cThat you are.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201c \u2018Sides, I think Joe\u2019s mood is about somethin\u2019 way more \u2018an that, Adam.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWay more than what?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou and him havin\u2019 a quarrel over goin\u2019 into Virginia City.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHow so?\u201d Pa asked, as Hoss speared another pork chop from the platter.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI saw the Morris rig on Virginia City Road this afternoon. I was too far away to see who was drivin\u2019, other than to say it was a woman \u2013 unless ol\u2019 George has takin\u2019 to wearin\u2019 dresses and bonnets.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSally?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss nodded. \u201cI think so. I bet she was headed here to see Joe, and he ran across her when he was out on Cochise.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam didn\u2019t know Sally Morris, but he\u2019d heard her mentioned several times since he\u2019d arrived. He assumed the Morris family had moved to the area sometime after he\u2019d gone to sea. He thought a moment, then asked his father, \u201cDoes Sally Morris mean a lot to Joe?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cShe does. Before the accident, I was certain Sally was the girl he\u2019d finally settle down with.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen it makes sense.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat makes sense?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHow upset he was when Hoss and I found him. Why he wants to be left alone this evening.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

When Adam didn\u2019t say anything further, Pa asked, \u201cWould you care to explain it to me and your brother?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t you see? He\u2019s gotten at least somewhat comfortable with the thought of being blind, as long as the outside world doesn\u2019t intrude. Around us, around Candy and Hop Sing, around the hands he\u2019s worked closely with for years, he\u2019s coming to accept that he has to ask for assistance sometimes, and he\u2019s come to trust that if he stumbles stepping off the front porch, no one\u2019s going to laugh at him. But today, the outside world did intrude, and in the form of a woman who means a lot to him. The last thing a man wants is to appear weak or helpless in front of a woman. I suspect Joe felt both of those things by the time Sally went on her way. Her unexpected presence emphasized to him that the outside world is going to intrude whether he wants it to or not, and that he\u2019s the only one who\u2019s in control of how he handles such intrusions.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSo it was kinda like a test?\u201d Hoss asked.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes,\u201d Adam agreed, \u201ckind of like that. And speaking from my own experience, I\u2019d venture to guess Joe thinks he\u2019s failed at this particular test, and failed badly. I\u2019d also venture to guess that right now, he can\u2019t see you sometimes have to fail before you can succeed.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhen will he see that?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, if I had the answer to that question, I\u2019d make my living traveling from town to town with a crystal ball, instead of spending each day trying to interest young boys in classic literature.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam glanced up the stairway. \u201cBut knowing our little brother like I do, I don\u2019t need a crystal ball to tell me that when he finally does come to the realization that he has to fail before he succeeds, it\u2019ll only happen the hard way, and with a good deal of stubborn resistance thrown in to boot.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t need no crystal ball ta\u2019 tell me that, either.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNor do I,\u201d Pa said with a chuckle.<\/span><\/p>\n

If nothing else, even though one chair at the table remained empty, supper ended on a lighter note than it had begun.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 10<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Joe didn\u2019t know what time it was when he heard the first rumble of thunder, and smelled the damp air that blew in through his window, heavy with the scent of the coming storm. His best estimate of the time \u2013 somewhere around one in the morning \u2013 was based on when everyone had gone to bed, which was two, maybe even three hours ago. Pa stopped in Joe\u2019s room then, asking if Joe wouldn\u2019t let Hop Sing bring up a supper tray.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo. I don\u2019t want anything.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe–\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t want anything, Pa.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe. . .son, it\u2019ll get better. I promise.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUnless you can promise my eyesight\u2019ll return, then no, Pa, it won\u2019t get better.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

There was a part of Joe that regretted the way he hurt his father with those words, and yet, a part of him that didn\u2019t care. He just wanted Pa to go away. He hated what his blindness was doing to the man. He hated the worry, the fear, the despair, and the hopelessness he heard in his father\u2019s voice. Emotions he hadn\u2019t heard since prior to Adam\u2019s arrival. As though Adam had the power to make everything all right.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

For a while, even Joe was fooled into thinking Adam had that power. That Adam\u2019s presence would somehow change things, because Adam was the oldest son, and the smartest son, and the son with all the answers. But now they must face the fact that Adam traveling all the way from Boston really hadn\u2019t made a tinker\u2019s damn worth of difference. Oh sure, Joe learned to read Braille, and saddle Cochise, and get down the stairs without falling. But overall, what good did any of those things do him? Today had been proof that he couldn\u2019t ride Cochise anywhere without an escort. And knowing how to read and write Braille weren\u2019t exactly assets on the Ponderosa, unless Pa suddenly started doing business with blind men. Joe supposed it was good that he was no longer falling down the stairs, though actually, a broken neck might be more of a blessing than a curse. At least it would end all of this pain, and allow Adam to return to his home, and Pa and Hoss to return to running the Ponderosa without being burdened by the son and brother who was now dependant on them for so many things.<\/span><\/p>\n

Pa left the room as quietly as he\u2019d entered. Joe could feel the man\u2019s anguish long after he was gone.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry, Pa,\u201d he whispered in a ragged voice. \u201cI\u2019m so damn sorry.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

One by one, bedroom doors closed, and the house grew quiet. Joe still found it strange to pass from day to night without noticing any difference, because to him, it was always nighttime now. In this ever-dark world, his room seemed like a prison cell. Yes, it was the place he retreated to when he didn\u2019t want his family to bother him, but it was also the place that effectively penned him in, and kept him safe. No one had to worry about Joe when he was in his room, because short of falling out of the window, he couldn\u2019t do himself any harm here. The thought of spending the rest of his life sequestered from people, activity, and the outdoors, was more than Joe could bear. Today\u2019s encounter with Sally only further proved to Joe that he\u2019d never again live the life he\u2019d been accustomed to, despite Adam\u2019s promises to the contrary.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe cradled his head in his hands. Not only was the world around him dark, the light inside him had been extinguished, too. When you had no purpose, you had no reason to go on living. Now Joe understood why he\u2019d often heard old cowhands say they\u2019d rather die in the saddle than be put out to pasture. Joe would have rather died in the saddle too, so to speak, but as things stood now, he was doomed to wallow in this pasture of darkness for years to come.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

The thought of wallowing didn\u2019t set well with Joe Cartwright\u2019s independent spirit. Sometimes a man was left with no way to prove he could still make his own decisions. Still be in control of his destiny. Given his current condition, Joe didn\u2019t have many ways to prove those things, but he did have one or two.<\/span><\/p>\n

Using the techniques he\u2019d been taught by Adam, Joe stood and walked to his closet. He opened the door, and with a questing hand, searched the top shelf. He\u2019d encountered his gun and gun belt by accident the other day, when putting some clothes away. All this time, he\u2019d assumed the gun was on the sideboard, or perhaps had been stored in a drawer of Pa\u2019s desk. After all, what good was a gun to a blind man? But someone \u2013 Hop Sing perhaps? \u2013 had brought the revolver to Joe\u2019s room, and put it in the closet. It made perfect sense when you thought about it. Hop Sing had probably gotten tired of dusting around the revolver, and he didn\u2019t have a key to Pa\u2019s desk, or to the gun cabinet. Hop Sing likely never thought of what the gun could be used for if Joe ran across it on a rainy night when life no longer seemed worth living.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe didn\u2019t need his eyesight to smoothly slip the gun from its holster. He rotated the cylinder, and using nothing but one finger, was assured bullets were still cradled in the chamber. He carried the gun to his bed and sat on the edge of the mattress. The firearm seemed unusually heavy in Joe\u2019s left hand, as though it was trying to send him a message. As though it was asking him not to do what he was contemplating. But that was stupid, because a gun couldn\u2019t send a person a message, any more than those soothsayers could who came to Virginia City once a year with the traveling show.<\/span><\/p>\n

When the thunder, lightning, and rain started in earnest, Joe stood and headed for his door. If nothing else, he was now good at navigating in the dark. The sound of the storm covered his movements, making it easy to get to the first floor undetected. He walked to the liquor cabinet housed at the far end of Pa\u2019s study, and pulled out a bottle that, judging from its weight in his hand, was a little more than half full. A bottle of what, he didn\u2019t know until he uncorked it and took a whiff. Whiskey. Not Joe\u2019s drink of choice, but not one he\u2019d refuse either. Especially if someone else was buying. And tonight, in a figurative manner of speaking, Joe supposed Pa was doing just that.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe didn\u2019t bother with a glass. He tipped the bottle, taking a long, careless swig that allowed liquor to run down his chin and stain his shirt. Cradling the bottle against his right side, and with his gun in his left hand, he walked toward the front door.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

The rain they\u2019d needed for so long hit the dry ground with hard splats. Water pelted Joe\u2019s skin like pebbles. He headed for the barn, cursing when the toe of his left boot caught a hitching post. He tumbled forward, barely managing to keep the whiskey upright. He climbed to his feet, no longer sure which direction he was traveling in, but not caring, either.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

It was only by chance that Joe bumped into a corner of the barn. He slid along the rough boards of the structure until he reached the doors. He set his bottle down long enough to open them, picked the bottle up, and slipped inside the building. His clothing was drenched, his saturated hair dripping water down his face and neck.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

With his gun still in his left hand, Joe felt his way to Cochise\u2019s stall. He eased himself to the ground, leaning back against a wooden support beam. The horse nickered softly behind him, and for just a moment, a nose nuzzled Joe\u2019s wet curls.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe lifted the bottle in the form of a salute to his loyal mount.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMight as well get this party started. Here\u2019s to you and me, Cooch.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe took his second long swig of the night, followed quickly by a third, and then a fourth, and then more swigs than he could keep track of. The liquor burned going down, but soon the burning changed to a comforting sort of warmth. The kind of warmth that wrapped Joe tightly in its embrace, and made him forget that what he intended to do in this barn would break his father\u2019s heart, leave Hoss grieving for his best friend, and send Adam back to Boston thinking he\u2019d failed.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, ya\u2019 didn\u2019t fail, Adam,\u201d Joe slurred, as he took another healthy swallow. \u201cI just ain\u2019t much of a student, big brother. Guezz ya\u2019 could say I flunked. Yep, thaz what I did. I flunked bein\u2019 blind, \u2018cause I just ain\u2019t no good at it.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Tears ran down Joe\u2019s cheeks as he caressed the butt of his gun.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNope, I just ain\u2019t no good at it. I\u2019m sorry, Pa. I\u2019m sorry, Hoss. Adam. . .I\u2019m. . . I\u2019m sorry. I\u2019m real sorry, but I just ain\u2019t no good at bein\u2019 blind.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 11<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Thunder rattled the windowpane, waking Adam. He turned away from the sound and was just about to drift off to sleep again, when lightning cracked somewhere in the distance, splitting a tree in half. Adam came to full awareness as rain slammed against the side of the house. He threw the sheet back and yawned, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed. He crossed to his window, the billowing curtains tangling around his shoulders. He freed himself of the material and shut the window, effectively keeping both the wind and rain outside where they belonged. He listened for sounds in the house indicating someone else was up and moving about, but couldn\u2019t hear much over the storm.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

I\u2019d better see if Pa\u2019s shutting windows, or if I need to do it.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Adam lit the lamp on his nightstand. He pulled on the pants he\u2019d laid across the end of the bed when he\u2019d retired, then grabbed a clean shirt and a pair of socks from a dresser drawer. He put the socks on and slipped into the shirt, but didn\u2019t bother buttoning it, or tucking the tails in. He picked up the lamp and exited the room.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s light cast a yellowish glow against the log walls of the hallway. Pa\u2019s bedroom door was still closed, as was Hoss\u2019s. It wasn\u2019t like Pa to sleep through such a powerful storm. Adam suspected his father\u2019s continuous worries over Joe, and the restless nights those worries caused, had finally caught up with the man. He rapped on the door, calling softly, \u201cPa.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

When there was no answer, Adam knocked again.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPa?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

When his father still didn\u2019t respond, Adam opened the door. Pa was sleeping on his right side in the center of the big bed and remained oblivious to Adam\u2019s presence. Adam set his lamp on the dresser, then crossed to the window. He shut it, retrieved the lamp, and exited the room as quietly as he\u2019d entered.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam knocked on Hoss\u2019s door next. As with Pa, he received no response other than the loud snores that indicated Hoss was sleeping on his back. Adam entered the room. As another deafening snore vibrated the pitcher on the washstand, he thought it was a wonder Joe hadn\u2019t come in here and made Hoss turn over \u2013 a ritual that dated back to when Hoss was no more than sixteen, and started raising the rafters with his snoring. Maybe Joe couldn\u2019t hear Hoss over the storm. Or considering the snores rivaled the rumbling thunder outside, maybe Joe couldn\u2019t distinguish between Mother Nature and his brother.<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam repeated the pattern he\u2019d followed in Pa\u2019s room. He set his lamp on Hoss\u2019s dresser and shut the window. Unlike Pa, however, the presence of someone in the room woke Hoss in the middle of a snore.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cRrrrph. Umph?\u201d Hoss hitched himself up on his elbows. Wispy hair stood in wayward tuffs, looking as out of sorts as Hoss himself. The large man squinted into the glow of the lamp.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, it\u2019s me. It\u2019s raining. I came in to shut your window. Go back to sleep.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss glanced toward the window. \u201cRainin\u2019?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUh huh. Pretty wild storm, too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss settled back down on the mattress. \u201cGood. Need the rain. \u2018Night.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGood night.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam picked up his lamp and slipped from the room. He smiled and shook his head with affection when the snores started again.<\/span><\/p>\n

The man proceeded down the hall to Joe\u2019s room. This door was open. He held up his lamp, looking inside. Joe\u2019s window was raised, but the bed hadn\u2019t been slept in.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Mmmm. If I didn\u2019t know better, little brother, I\u2019d think you were up to your old tricks of sneaking out in the middle of the night to go meet up with some girl, or join your buddies in a poker game. But you\u2019re too old to have to sneak out of the house these days, and somehow I don\u2019t think even you\u2019d be foolish enough to climb down from a two story window without your eyesight. Or at least I hope you\u2019re not that foolish.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Adam craned his head, looking out the window just to make certain he was right. When he didn\u2019t see signs of anyone below, he shut Joe\u2019s window and left the room.<\/span><\/p>\n

He must be downstairs shutting windows. Or maybe skipping supper got the best of him, and he\u2019s raiding Hop Sing\u2019s pantry.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Adam headed for the stairway. If Joe hadn\u2019t already shut them, the windows in the dining area would be open. It wasn\u2019t until Adam reached the landing that he saw the open front door. He frowned with puzzlement as he made his way down the reminder of the stairs, and hurried to shut the windows behind the dining room table. The kitchen was dark and silent. Adam stepped in there briefly, his lamp revealing nothing but an empty room.<\/span><\/p>\n

The man walked back to the foyer. Water soaked the soles of his socks as he went to the doorway and looked out. It was too dark to see anything, until a streak of lightning made it seem like noon. Though the opportunity to view the ranch yard didn\u2019t last long, it was long enough for Adam to spot the open barn doors.<\/span><\/p>\n

What the. . . .? Joe must be out there. Wonder if he heard something? Maybe one of the horses got spooked.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Adam set his lamp on the sideboard and grabbed his boots from behind the door. He pulled the boots on and left his lamp where it was, exchanging it for a lantern. He lit the lantern and picked it up by its wire handle. He stepped out into the storm, firmly shutting the door so no more water would blow into the house. With running strides, Adam crossed the ranch yard, his shirttails flying out behind him like a cape.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 12<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe? Hey, Joe, are you out here? Joe!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam lifted the lantern, shining it around the yard as he ran toward the barn.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe! Joe, where are you? Joe! Joe, where–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLookz like ya\u2019 found me, big brother.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam stopped in the barn\u2019s doorway. He stepped farther into the structure when the driving rain began to soak his clothing. He hung the lantern from a nearby hook.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat are you doing out here?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s laughter spoke of silliness brought on by too much alcohol.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBoy, Adam, fer a smart guy, you surely can be dumb sometimes. Whaz it look like I\u2019m doin\u2019?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cFeeling sorry for yourself.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWrong.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh really?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t cock an eyebrow at me and say that like yer some kinda\u2019 know-it-all.\u201d Joe lifted his left hand, giving Adam his first view of the gun now being waved in his direction. \u201cWhich ya\u2019 are, ya\u2019 know. A know-it-all.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam kept a wary eye on the gun. He wasn\u2019t concerned Joe had any intention of shooting him, but regardless of intentions, a drunken blind man wielding a firearm warranted caution.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI am, huh?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYep.\u201d Joe took another swallow of whiskey. \u201cNow, as far as what I\u2019m doin\u2019, Mr. Know-It-All. I\u2019m gettin\u2019 drunk.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLooks to me like you already are.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh no.\u201d Joe shook his head with exaggerated awkwardness. \u201cNo no no no. I\u2019m juz gettin\u2019 started.\u201d Now the bottle was waved at Adam instead of the gun. \u201cCare ta\u2019 join me?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot right now. It\u2019s late, Joe. Let me help you back to the house and–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo! I don\u2019t need yer help! I\u2019m fine juz where I am.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s your problem, isn\u2019t it?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhaz my problem?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThe word help. You can\u2019t accept that, for the rest of your life, there\u2019re times when you\u2019re going to need help.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot for the rest of my life!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, Joe, for the rest of your life.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo! I\u2019ll get my sight back. Doc Martin says–\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDoc Martin doesn\u2019t say anything, because he hasn\u2019t been out here in weeks. Why do you think that is?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause he\u2019s biz . .biz. . .busy. . .\u201d Joe stumbled over the words, trying to collect his muddled thoughts. \u201cBusy mendin\u2019 some cowboy\u2019s busted leg. Or some miner\u2019s busted arm, or some kid\u2019s busted nose, or some woman\u2019s busted ankle \u2013 boy, oh boy, we sure are a clumsy bunch \u2018round these parts, aren\u2019t we. Or maybe he\u2019s deliverin\u2019 a baby, or–\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, he hasn\u2019t been out here because he can\u2019t help you. Because he knows your sight isn\u2019t going to return, and that there\u2019s no use in getting your hopes up, or making you empty promises.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe struggled to stand. He fell back to his butt three times before he finally got to his feet. He swayed back and forth like he was on the deck of rocking ship.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cShut up! Shut yer mouth, Adam! Go back to Boston where you belong! I didn\u2019t ask you to come here in the first place. I don\u2019t need you! I don\u2019t need you, or anyone else for that matter!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy? Because when you\u2019ve got yourself plied with a sufficient amount of liquor you plan on putting that gun to your head and pulling the trigger?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSo what if I do?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHave you given even the smallest bit of thought as to what that\u2019ll do to Pa?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll be doin\u2019 him a favor.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHow do you figure that?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause he won\u2019t have to spend the rest of his life takin\u2019 care of his blind son!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHe doesn\u2019t have to take care of you. No one has to take care of you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI need help! You said so yourself.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNeeding help is a lot different from being taken care of.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot to me it\u2019s not.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOkay, so to you it\u2019s not. What\u2019s supposed to happen come morning then? Am I supposed to tell Pa where to find your body? Or Hoss? How do you think Hoss\u2019ll feel when he walks in to this barn, and sees you slumped over a stall with half your skull missing and your brains splattered all over the walls? What do you think a sight like that will do to Hoss, and then to Pa, when Hoss brings him out here?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t care!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Even though Joe couldn\u2019t see him, Adam thrust a finger at his brother.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell you\u2019d better care! You\u2019d better start thinking of someone other than yourself for a change, Joe, because it\u2019ll kill Pa. As surely as I\u2019m standing here, it\u2019ll kill Pa to see you like that. It\u2019ll kill him to know you took your own life. He\u2019ll spend the rest of his days wondering how he could have helped you. Wondering what he could have said that would have kept you from drinking yourself into a stupor, then using that gun to end your life.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHe couldn\u2019t have said anything! Tell him that, Adam. You tell him he couldn\u2019t have said anything! Tell Pa it\u2019s not his fault.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not telling him a damn thing except that his youngest son was a coward!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not a coward!\u201d Joe raged over the thunder and driving rain.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLooks to me like you are. Only a man who can\u2019t face up to, and then conquer the hardships God has handed him, commits suicide.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh, so yer a preacher now too, is that it? Brother Adam, the preacher who holds church in a barn, with nothin\u2019 but a blind drunk for an audience. Brother Adam Cartwright.\u201d Joe giggled. \u201cThat\u2019ll be easy to remember, \u2018cause you already are my brother.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not preaching. I\u2019m just telling you–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re just tellin\u2019 me horseshit. Blah, blah, blah. God, Adam, but you must put yer students right to sleep.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe lifted the bottle, gulping the remainder of the liquor in four swallows. The bottle slipped from his fingertips and fell to the barn floor with a \u201cplunk\u201d as he swiped at the whisky dribbling down his chin.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joseph, you sure are a sloppy drunk. Now drop the gun like you did that bottle.<\/em>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

But Joe hung onto the gun as he warmed up to his next subject.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd you talk about conquer, Brother Adam?\u201d Joe paced in unsteady circles as though he was the one giving a Sunday sermon. \u201cWhat do you know about conquering anything? You can see. You can see, Adam! You sit at yer fancy job all day, then go home to yer fancy house, and yer fancy neighbors, and yer fancy parties, and Lord knows what all.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t know anything about how I conduct my life.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe stopped, pivoting in the direction of Adam\u2019s voice. \u201cAnd just whose fault is that? You were the one who quit writing, not me! Well. . .okay, I did, but only after you quit writing first.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd the hardships God has handed me, you say? Hardships? Being blind isn\u2019t a hardship! Being blind is. . .it\u2019s like a disease I can\u2019t get rid of! It\u2019s like I\u2019m a cripple, do you understand? I\u2019ve still got two arms and two legs, but I\u2019m a goddamn cripple! I can\u2019t do the things I used to do. People\u2019ll look at me differently. They\u2019ll treat me differently.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe pointed his gun toward the rafters, the butt resting against his temple, his index finger on the trigger. Although Joe couldn\u2019t do himself much harm with the gun aimed in that direction, Adam feared this was his brother\u2019s first step toward committing an act that would end in the kind of tragedy their father would never recover from.<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam moved two steps closer to Joe.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd that\u2019s a reason to die? Because someone looks at you differently?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, it is! It\u2019s a good reason as far as I\u2019m concerned.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIf you ask me, it\u2019s a dumb reason.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell I didn\u2019t ask you! Besides, ya\u2019 don\u2019t know anything about it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m getting a little weary of you telling me what I do and don\u2019t know about.\u00a0<\/span>
\n Now come on.\u201d Adam stepped forward, shagging his brother by the arm. \u201cLet\u2019s go in the house.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe jerked from Adam\u2019s grasp. \u201cLeave me alone!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI thought you were years past acting like a spoiled brat, but I guess I was wrong!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd I thought you were years past acting like a self-righteous, know-it-all jackass, but I guess I was wrong too!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam took a deep breath, and then counted to ten in an effort to gain control of his temper. This exchange was proof that he and Joe could still get underneath one another\u2019s skin if they put their minds to it. But now wasn\u2019t the time for angry words they\u2019d both eventually regret. Now was the time for Adam to do what older brothers do best. Take charge of the situation, calm everyone down, and in this case \u2013 get that damn gun out of Joe\u2019s hand.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, look, I shouldn\u2019t have called you a spoiled brat.\u201d Adam took another step toward his brother, hoping the sound of the storm would prevent Joe from discerning how close he was. \u201cI\u2019m sorry.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell if you\u2019re expectin\u2019 an applegy. . .appolog. . .appolo. . .damn, that\u2019s a hard word to say when a man\u2019s drunk.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cApology?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThaz the one. So if yer expectin\u2019 me to say sorry, I ain\u2019t gonna, \u2018cause I\u2019m not ready to yet.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not expecting anything. Now give me the gun, and let\u2019s go in the house.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam let out a deep, pent-up breath. \u201cJoe. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe took a step backwards. \u201cQuit movin\u2019 towards me! Just go back to the house and leave me alone.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou stubborn hard-headed mule. Now come on! It\u2019s late, and I\u2019m sick and tired of standing here watching you wallow in self-pity because you can\u2019t see. A lot of people can\u2019t see. I\u2019ve got an entire school full of children who can\u2019t see. Children, Joe! Children who have accepted their lot in life with more dignity and grace than you seem to possess.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

With a cry of outrage, Joe doubled over and charged his brother, catching Adam below the ribs with his right shoulder. He backed the man up all the way to the far wall, slamming him against it, and driving Adam\u2019s breath out in a pain filled \u201cOoof!\u201d As Adam had known when he\u2019d first arrived on the Ponderosa, he was no longer a match with Joe where strength was concerned.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cShut up!\u201d Joe shouted. \u201cDon\u2019t lecture me about pity. I\u2019m don\u2019t pity myself!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou do too!\u201d Adam struggled to push Joe off his chest. \u201cYou\u2019ve done nothing but feel sorry for yourself since the day you lost your sight, and it\u2019s past time you stop! It\u2019s past time you face up to the rotten hand you\u2019ve been dealt and learn to live with it!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat do you know about it? What do you know about any of it?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat do I know about it?\u201d Adam finally managed to shove his brother away. \u201cI\u2019ll tell you what I know about it!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam grabbed a fistful of Joe\u2019s shirt and jerked him forward. He clasped onto Joe\u2019s hand and pressed it to his right side.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cFeel that, Joe?\u201d Adam shouted. \u201cDo you feel that?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cFeel what?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cExactly. Nothing! My right arm is gone. It\u2019s gone, Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe staggered backwards. \u201cWha. . .what?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s gone. It had to be amputated after an. . .an accident at sea.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut. . .but why? Why. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy didn\u2019t Pa tell you?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe swallowed hard and nodded. Adam\u2019s news seemed to have sobered him up quicker than any of Hop Sing\u2019s home remedies could have.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause I asked him not to. Because I didn\u2019t want you and Hoss to know.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause, just like you, I went through a long period of time where I wallowed in self-pity. Because, just like you, I went through a long period of time where I didn\u2019t want to be seen by anyone, or acknowledge what happened to me, or accept help from anyone. Not even my own family. And when I finally was able to move forward with my life. . .well, even though Pa knew of my physical limitations, I still couldn\u2019t bring myself to let him tell you and Hoss. I didn\u2019t want either of you feeling sorry for me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI wouldn\u2019t have–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam smiled. \u201cYes, you would have. Just like I felt sorry for you, when Pa first wired me about the explosion. It\u2019s taken me a long time, but I\u2019ve come to learn that someone feeling sorry for me isn\u2019t necessarily a bad thing. It just means that person cares.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe thought over Adam\u2019s words. He finally gave a slow nod, then took a few hesitant steps toward his brother. His gun fell as he reached out his left arm. Adam grasped the arm as Joe stepped forward and buried his face in Adam\u2019s chest. Whether the alcohol made it impossible for Joe to stand any longer, or whether he was simply exhausted, Adam wasn\u2019t sure. Regardless, when Joe slowly crumpled to the barn floor, Adam went down with him.<\/span><\/p>\n

Tears came to Adam\u2019s eyes as Joe cried into his shirt. He rested his chin atop Joe\u2019s head and rubbed his back while murmuring, \u201cI know. It\u2019s all right. I know. It\u2019s okay,\u201d each time Joe said, \u201cI\u2019m sorry, Adam. I\u2019m sorry. I\u2019m so sorry.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam knew the repeated apologies covered an array of things Joe was unable to voice. From the name-calling, to the words said in anger, to all of the times in recent weeks that Joe had accused Adam of not understanding what he was going through, to Joe\u2019s sorrow over the physical handicap Adam had lived with day in and day out for the past three years.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t cry for me, Joe,\u201d Adam said gently. \u201cDon\u2019t cry for me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s arm wrapped tighter around Adam\u2019s vacant right side.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m. . .I\u2019m just sorry I didn\u2019t know. I would have helped you. If I\u2019d have known, I\u2019d have done anything I could to help you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know you would have. But you didn\u2019t know, and that was by my choice. Don\u2019t blame yourself, kid. Don\u2019t blame yourself.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s use of the word \u201ckid\u201d got a small chuckle from Joe.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHaven\u2019t been a kid for a while now. Got the gray hair to prove it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, you do, but no matter how gray your hair gets, you\u2019ll always be my kid brother.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The storm had quieted to a soft, steady rain, by the time Joe loosened his grasp on Adam and sat up. He swiped at his eyes in a self-conscious sort of way that Adam tactfully ignored.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam hooked his left hand beneath Joe\u2019s armpit. \u201cCome on. Let\u2019s get up off this floor.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe didn\u2019t protest when Adam helped him stand. He swayed for a moment, but Adam surmised that was more from the effects of a long, emotional night, rather than from the whiskey.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam bent and picked up Joe\u2019s gun. He thrust it at his brother.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHere. Hold onto this.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam could tell Joe was surprised that he\u2019d trust him with the gun. He could also tell he\u2019d made the correct decision. Joe needed to realize that when he stumbled \u2013 literally or figuratively speaking \u2013 Adam had confidence he would get back on his feet again, and keep going in the right direction.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd I\u2019ll get rid of this before Pa finds it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThe whiskey bottle.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh. Good idea.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI think so too,\u201d Adam said, as he buried the bottle in the bottom of a wooden barrel used for trash.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Actually, Adam wasn\u2019t concerned that Pa would say much of anything to his twenty-nine year old son for over imbibing, and he doubted Joe was too concerned about it, either. But the less Pa knew of what almost transpired in this barn tonight, the better.<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam took the lantern off the hook. He carried it in his hand, while jutting his elbow toward Joe and giving him a gentle nudge.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCome on. I think it\u2019s past time we call it a night, don\u2019t you?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGuess so.\u201d Joe laid a hand on Adam\u2019s arm, using it for guidance as they walked from the barn. He was still unsteady on his feet, and his words came a bit slowly, as though his alcohol-laden brain had to think hard to string them together. \u201cIf Pa figures out I\u2019m hung over come morning, he\u2019ll be tossing me out of bed at daybreak.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cProbably,\u201d Adam agreed as he stopped to close the barn doors. \u201cThough he won\u2019t hear it from me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThanks, Adam. I don\u2019t want him to know about. . .you know. The gun and all.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know. And you\u2019re welcome.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The brothers walked together through the rain to the house. Adam made sure everything would look as it should to Pa come morning. He put his boots back where they belonged and blew out the lantern, returning it to the sideboard while retrieving his lamp. Joe\u2019s hand remained on Adam\u2019s arm as they climbed the stairs. When they reached Joe\u2019s room, Adam stopped.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHere you go.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThanks.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re welcome.\u201d Adam turned to head toward his own room. \u201cGood night.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHey, Adam,\u201d Joe called softly.<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam turned around.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe pointed in the general direction of Adam\u2019s missing arm.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGuess this means we\u2019re both left handed now, huh?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

It was the kind of bad joke only brothers would find funny. And then even funnier, when a deep voice from behind a thick oak door shouted, \u201cWhat in blazes are you two doing out there laughing like a couple of wild hyenas? Do either of you know what time it is?\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUh. . .sorry, Pa,\u201d Adam apologized.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah,\u201d Joe said in-between one of his staccato laughs. \u201cSorry, Pa.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t be sorry! Just go back to bed!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, Sir.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSure, Pa.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNow!\u201d came the shout, when Joe\u2019s laughter started all over again.<\/span><\/p>\n

It had been a rough night, but nonetheless, it was times like this that made it difficult for Adam to think about returning to Boston. Without his family being aware of it, Adam\u2019s work here was almost finished. However, he had a proposal to make to Joe, but that could wait until later in the day. Even at forty-two years of age, Adam wasn\u2019t willing to try his father\u2019s patience at three in the morning.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201c \u2018Night, Joe,\u201d Adam whispered.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201c \u2018Night,\u201d Joe stage-whispered in return, still laughing.<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam waited in the hall until Joe entered his room and closed the door. He turned for his own room again, all remnants of humor evaporating as he wondered how Pa would take it if he were told his youngest son was leaving the Ponderosa, and moving across the country to start his life anew.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 13<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Two weeks had passed since the much needed rain storm. Ben Cartwright sat at his desk, recording figures next to names in the ranch\u2019s payroll ledger. He glanced up when the front door opened, but couldn\u2019t see who\u2019d entered. Nonetheless, by the careful, steady-paced walk, he knew it was his youngest son.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Gone were the days when Joe bounded in and tossed his hat on the sideboard with a cheery, \u201cHi, Pa!\u201d What Ben wouldn\u2019t give to hear the footsteps that indicated the energy and fearlessness that had defined Joseph Cartwright since birth. Although Ben knew the energy was still present, it was now tempered by the caution Joe exercised so he wouldn\u2019t trip over a piece of furniture, tumble down the stairs, or walk into a wall.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

As far as fear went. . .well, Ben silently acknowledged no man was without fear, regardless of how vehemently that man might deny it. But as Joe\u2019s father, it caused Ben deep pain to think of the fears Joe now had to live with by virtue of having lost his sight. The things most people took for granted \u2013 the ability to flee a burning house, jump out of the way of boisterous cowhands racing their horses down a Virginia City street, navigate alone outdoors \u2013 were all situations that could cost Joe his life without someone nearby to assist him. These possibilities, and so many others, worried Ben. He wanted to do all he could to keep his son free from harm. Yet Ben knew Adam was right, each time Adam reminded him that he\u2019d do Joe more harm by trying to restrict his movements, rather than let him explore the world as a blind man, and take a few falls along the way.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPa?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben forced a false note of cheerfulness to his voice, just like he\u2019d done for so many weeks now whenever he spoke to Joe.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m right here, Joseph. In the study.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe came around the wall and stopped when his left hand encountered the front corner of his father\u2019s desk.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSo, you boys are back from your ride?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam and I are. Hoss stopped to help Candy fix some fencing damaged during that storm.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhere is Adam, then?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTaking care of the horses.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd he\u2019s not bossing you around,\u201d Ben teased, \u201cwhile making you help?\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, not this time for a change.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen you might as well get washed up for supper. Hop Sing\u2019s been banging things around in the kitchen for the last two hours, which can only mean we\u2019re going to eat soon.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, probably so. But. . .uh. . .Pa, I need. . .I\u2019d like to talk to you for a few minutes first, if you have the time.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOf course I have the time. It sounds serious.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo. Not serious. Well, I suppose it\u2019s kind of serious.\u201d Hastily, Joe added, \u201cBut it\u2019s nothing bad.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s been quite a few years since I\u2019ve worried about you reporting anything of a \u201cbad\u201d nature to me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGuess that\u2019s true,\u201d Joe agreed. \u201cBoy, I\u2019ve sure gotten boring in my old age, haven\u2019t I?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben laughed. \u201cI wouldn\u2019t say that.\u201d He put his pencil on the open ledger page, stood, and placed a hand on his son\u2019s elbow. \u201cCome on. Let\u2019s go over and sit down.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe didn\u2019t protest as his father led him to the settee. He sat on the end closest to the dining area, while Ben sat in his leather chair.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s legs jiggled up and down, that movement indicating his uneasiness to Ben. If this had been fifteen years ago, Ben would have known he was about to be told of a poor mark in school, or a homework assignment left undone, or a prank pulled in town that Mitch Devlin and Joe had gotten caught at. But because Joe hadn\u2019t needed to confess to misdeeds of that nature in a good number of years now, Ben was left uncertain regarding the source of his son\u2019s nervousness.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUh. . .yeah?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou said you needed to talk to me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUm. . .yeah.\u201d Joe stilled his legs. \u201cYeah, I do.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen just go ahead and say what\u2019s on your mind, son.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOkay. . .um. . .well, I. . .Pa. . .um, Pa. . .Adam\u2019s. . .Adam\u2019s. . .uh. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam\u2019s what?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam. . .he\u2019s asked me to go back to Boston with him.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Although this announcement of a visit East was unexpected, Ben couldn\u2019t say he was completely surprised by it. He didn\u2019t know what had transpired between Adam and Joe the night of the storm \u2013 other than some heavy drinking on Joe\u2019s part that the boys thought their father was ignorant of \u2013 but ever since then, Joe\u2019s mood had improved, and no longer did he sink into periods of depression. Or at least not so that it was obvious to his family.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben had also come to realize it was sometime that night when Adam finally told Joe he\u2019d lost his arm. What transpired between the boys in that regard was never spoken of to Ben, either. But he\u2019d noticed Adam no longer kept the right side of his body shielded from Joe, and he\u2019d also overheard a couple of jokes about Adam now being left-handed too. As well, something about the sudden improvement in Joe\u2019s mindset indicated to Ben that Joe finally understood he wasn\u2019t alone when it came to being forced to adjust to a new way of life.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPa?\u201d Joe questioned with trepidation at Ben\u2019s silence. He joked, \u201cYou still here?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m still here, Joe. Just thinking a moment.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSo. . .?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSo. . .I\u2019d say it\u2019s a good idea.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou would?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben chuckled. \u201cDon\u2019t sound so shocked. Yes, I would. It\u2019ll be a nice opportunity for you to see. . .for you to get acquainted with a different part of the country. You deserve a long vacation. Then right after the fall cattle drive, Hoss and I\u2019ll join you for a couple of weeks. Candy can run things here while we\u2019re gone. We\u2019ll celebrate an early Christmas with Adam, then the three of us can head home before winter sets in and travel becomes unpredictable.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUm. . .uh. . .yeah, that sounds good. You and Hoss coming to Boston, I mean. Adam would like that. But. . .uh. . .Pa, I. . .um. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou what?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI. . .I\u2019m not talking about visiting Adam. I\u2019m talking about living with him.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLiving with him?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe nodded. \u201cMoving there.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Now it was Ben who couldn\u2019t keep the shock out of his voice. \u201cPermanently?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah.\u201d Joe smiled and shrugged. \u201cOr at least until I wear out my welcome. Maybe eventually I\u2019ll buy a home there and hire someone to help me with the things I can\u2019t do. Adam said Boston is full of \u201cgentlemen\u2019s assistants,\u201d whatever that involves.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Almost absently, Ben recited, \u201cHelping you with your mail and other personal correspondence, doing household chores, doing the marketing, taking you where you need to go in the buggy, things of that nature.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s what I thought. Sounds pretty stuffy for a bronc buster like me, but that\u2019s a ways off yet. I\u2019ll be living with Adam until I save the money to go out on my own.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, you don\u2019t have to save any money. I\u2019ll give you whatever is needed for a home and the hired help you require.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Pa!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo,\u201d Joe shook his head. \u201cDon\u2019t you see? That\u2019s exactly why I have to do this.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDo what?\u201d Ben leaned forward in his chair. \u201cSon, I\u2019ll admit I\u2019m confused. Just what is it that\u2019s suddenly so attractive about moving to Boston? I can have a house built for you right here on the Ponderosa if that\u2019s what you want. I can hire as many assistants as you need. I can–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cListen to yourself, Pa. It\u2019s all you. What you can do for me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut you\u2019re my son. I want to do things for you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know, and I\u2019m grateful for that. I really am. But I don\u2019t wanna take charity.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCharity! Joseph–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI wanna pull my own weight, just like you\u2019ve always expected your sons to do. I don\u2019t want you giving me a house and money if I\u2019m not doing anything in return to earn them.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut you will do things in return to earn them.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat? What will I do? I can\u2019t see, Pa. I\u2019m never gonna see again.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, don\u2019t say it. You and I both know it\u2019s true. I\u2019m not gonna get my eyesight back. Because of that, I need to figure out a way to earn a living, and I just don\u2019t see how that\u2019s possible here on the Ponderosa.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben cast about for something to say. Something to offer Joe that would make him feel useful, and as though he\u2019d be able to earn his keep. The problem was, there was little Ben could think of.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

As though he could read his father\u2019s mind, Joe said, \u201cSee, you can\u2019t come up with anything either.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s because I haven\u2019t given it a lot of thought yet. I. . .I\u2019ve been hoping as much as you have that this condition would be temporary.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know,\u201d Joe said softly. \u201cBut you and I both have to face that it\u2019s not going to turn out that way.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes,\u201d Ben acknowledged in a tone as quiet as Joe\u2019s, \u201cI suppose we do, don\u2019t we.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe allowed his father a minute to gather his thoughts and emotions before speaking again.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s just not a lot of things I can do on a ranch to earn a living, Pa. But in Boston I can earn a living.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDoing what?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTeaching at Adam\u2019s school.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTeaching?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe chuckled. \u201cYeah, I know. Me, Joe Cartwright, a teacher. Who\u2019d have ever believed it, given how much I hated sitting in a schoolhouse all day. But Adam\u2019s been talking to me about it the past couple weeks. He\u2019s even been teaching me how to be a teacher.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat exactly would you teach, son?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSkills for the blind. Adam said another teacher aside from Miss Brockington is needed to work with the new pupils. He\u2019s wanted to split off her classes for some time. Have her teach just the girls, and have a male teacher for the boys. He said he hasn\u2019t been able to find the right person for the job, and that he thinks I might be that person. The school board would have to approve of me first though, so it\u2019s not like I\u2019m guaranteed the job or anything. But Adam thinks I have a pretty good chance.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I don\u2019t suppose Adam would ask you travel all the way to Boston unless he\u2019s fairly confident the school board will hire you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHe said as much. And he even wants me to teach the students about living and working on a ranch.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSounds like your area of expertise.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe smiled. \u201cYeah, I\u2019m pretty sure I can convince the school board I know a few things about ranching.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m certain you can.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019ll. . .it\u2019ll be a big change for me. To live back East, and teach school. It\u2019s not something I ever thought about, let alone thought I might be doing someday. But I hope you understand why I have to give this a try.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

As much as Ben hated to endorse this idea, he wouldn\u2019t be doing right by his youngest if he didn\u2019t give Joe his full support.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, Joe, I understand.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe brightened. \u201cYou do?\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI do. But don\u2019t think there won\u2019t be some bumps in the road. Some adjustments to make.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t think that.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGood. Because not only will you have to adjust to a way of life that\u2019s foreign to you, but you\u2019ll be doing so while living under Adam\u2019s roof, and having him as your boss, as well. Are you sure you\u2019ve given that sufficient thought?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve given it some.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou and Adam don\u2019t always see eye to eye, you know.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cEven less so now.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben couldn\u2019t help but smile a little at Joe\u2019s humor. It hurt to hear him joke about his lost sight, but at the same time, it felt good to hear him joke about it, too.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, even less so now,\u201d Ben acknowledged. \u201cRegardless of that, you and Adam can butt heads more than a couple of old rams fighting over the same mountain. Added to that, you haven\u2019t had to live or work together for six years. Are you both prepared to be around one another as much as Adam\u2019s proposing?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI think so. We\u2019ve talked about it. We know it might not be easy at first.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAll right,\u201d Ben nodded. \u201cIt\u2019s good that you two have discussed it. Obviously, none of us can predict how well this arrangement will or won\u2019t work. All I ask, is that neither of you let any disagreements escalate to the point that they cause a permanent estrangement in your relationship.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe won\u2019t.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd I want you to remember something else.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat at any time, if you want to come back to the Ponderosa, you\u2019re more than welcome to. As I told Adam when he left for sea, there will always be a place for you here, son. A permanent place, should you choose to return to it.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThanks, Pa. That means a lot.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHas Adam said when you boys are leaving?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNext Wednesday.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Six days. Six days from now, Ben would be left with just one son by his side to run the Ponderosa. It wasn\u2019t how he\u2019d envisioned the future, but then, Joe hadn\u2019t envisioned his future as a blind man, any more than Adam had envisioned a woman named Laura Dayton would prompt him to leave Nevada, and from there, experience a chain of events that would eventually have him running a school in Boston.<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben fought to keep the sorrow from his voice. \u201cWell, now, that\u2019ll give us some time yet to get used to the idea of both you and Adam leaving.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, guess so. And, Pa?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPlease don\u2019t tell Hoss about this. I need to be the one who does that.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou do,\u201d Ben agreed. \u201cI won\u2019t lie to you. Your leaving is going to be hard on him, Joe. Harder than it was when Adam left.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know. I hate doing this to him. If I thought there was a better choice I\u2019d make it in a heartbeat. I really would.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI understand that, son. Hoss will understand it, too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI hope so.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHe will.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The two men sat in silence for a few minutes. When Hop Sing began carrying food to the table, Joe stood.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGuess I\u2019d better wash up.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLooks like it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe laid a hand on his father\u2019s shoulder as he brushed by the back of Ben\u2019s chair. Ben reached up and clasped the hand, not wanting to ever let go. Joe seemed to understand that, because he stood there patiently while Ben gave his hand a long squeeze before finally releasing it.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Ben watched Joe climb the stairs. When his son was no longer visible, Ben leaned his head back and closed his eyes. It was another hand on his shoulder that caused Ben to open his eyes and lift his head.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry, Pa. The last thing I want to do is take him away from you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t need to apologize. I can\u2019t fault you for offering Joe the one thing he wants most right now.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s that?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA purpose.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Like he\u2019d done with Joe, Ben squeezed Adam\u2019s hand. He released it when Hoss walked in the door, remembering to smile and not let on to his middle son that, in just six short days, their household would grow smaller, quieter, and lonelier, as they became a family of two.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 14<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re awful quiet today, little brother. Somethin\u2019 wrong?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUh. . .no. No. Not at all.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNow if I was a bettin\u2019 man, I\u2019d stake a ten spot that you\u2019re fibbin\u2019 me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh yeah? Why\u2019s that?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss reached for Joe\u2019s fishing pole and yanked his line from the creek.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201c \u2018Cause this is the second time you\u2019ve cast your line in without baitin\u2019 the hook.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh. Uh. . .guess I\u2019m not paying attention to what I\u2019m doin\u2019.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGuess not. Unless you\u2019re figurin\u2019 on comin\u2019 up with a new way of catchin\u2019 fish that don\u2019t involve worms.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWasn\u2019t figuring on it, no. But hey,\u201d Joe shrugged, \u201cif it works. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTake it from me, the fisherman in this family. It won\u2019t.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIf you say so.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI do.\u201d Hoss put the pole back in Joe\u2019s hands, this time with a worm on the hook. \u201cThere ya\u2019 go. Cast it again.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe stood, drew the pole back over his left shoulder, and in a smooth motion flung it forward, casting his line into the wide creek. He sat down beside Hoss on the grassy rise along the banks of Walcott Creek, where they\u2019d eaten lunch two hours earlier.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNow maybe you\u2019ll have better luck.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDoesn\u2019t matter what kinda\u2019 luck I have. You\u2019ve already caught a dozen fish.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell now, Joseph, that just there goes to show ya\u2019.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cShow me what?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat aside from bein\u2019 a better cowpoke than you, and a better tracker than you, and a better blacksmith than you, and better at doctorin\u2019 sick animals than you, I\u2019m a better fisherman, too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSeems that way.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe jerked back when a big hand was laid on his forehead.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat the heck are you doing?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSeein\u2019 if you gotta fever.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat in tarnation for?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201c \u2018Cause it ain\u2019t like my little brother to say nothin\u2019 more than, \u201cSeems that way,\u201d when I tell him I\u2019m better at stuff than he is.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell enjoy it while it lasts.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI will,\u201d Hoss muttered, while studying his sibling. Joe had been the one who\u2019d suggested this Saturday afternoon fishing trip. When Hoss said something about Adam coming along too, Adam quickly \u2013 too quickly for Hoss\u2019s taste \u2013 claimed he had other things to do. And Pa. . .well, he\u2019d been a little too enthusiastic about letting Hoss take the day off during a time when they were still discovering damage from the storm scattered all over the Ponderosa.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOkay, Joe, what\u2019s goin\u2019 on?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhatta ya\u2019 mean, what\u2019s goin\u2019 on?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI mean, you asked me to come fishin\u2019 with ya\u2019, but ya\u2019 haven\u2019t said more than three words since we left home. And Adam claimed to have things to do that kept him from comin\u2019 with us, but I can\u2019t figure out what exactly those things are. And\u00a0<\/span>
\n Pa. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat about Pa?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019ve still got lots of cleanup from that storm. It\u2019s not like Pa to be so eager for me to take the afternoon off when there\u2019s work to be done.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe Pa\u2019s gettin\u2019 soft in his old age.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe, but I don\u2019t rightly think so.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh you don\u2019t, don\u2019t you?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I don\u2019t. So, are ya\u2019 gonna tell me what\u2019s goin\u2019 on, or am I gonna dump ya\u2019 headfirst in this creek?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s chest jutted out in challenge. \u201cYou ain\u2019t big enough or tough enough to dump me headfirst anywhere.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou wanna rethink that statement, little brother?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNope.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re sure \u2018bout that now?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou bet I\u2019m sure, ya\u2019 big ox.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe and Hoss hadn\u2019t been brothers for almost three decades for Joe not to know what was coming next. Except without his sight, he wasn\u2019t quite quick enough to thwart Hoss\u2019s grab for him. What followed was the kind of free-for-all the brothers had engaged in since childhood, with Joe struggling for all he was worth to break free, and Hoss fighting to keep the sly little bugger in his grasp, while at the same time being careful not to hurt him.<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss wasn\u2019t sure which one of them ended up in the creek first. All he knew was that someone\u2019s foot hit the bait bucket and sent the worms flying, while someone else\u2019s foot hit the empty lunch bucket and sent it flying, and then they were tumbling down the bank, rolling over and over with their hands locked onto each other\u2019s shoulders and shouting like a couple of Paiutes on the warpath.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

They both yelled when they hit the cold water. What was refreshing on a hot summer\u2019s day when they were boys, was just plain uncomfortable now. They splashed handfuls of water in each other\u2019s faces for old time\u2019s sake, then Hoss grasped Joe by the arm and pulled him to his feet. He looked around, spotting his hat and Joe\u2019s bobbing a few feet away. He grabbed the hats with his free hand, tossing them onto the grass to dry. The brothers stumbled together to the bank, laughing, cussing, and dripping. Hoss guided Joe in scaling the incline, then collapsed beside him in the warm sun.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe pulled his shirttails from his pants so his shirt would dry completely. Hoss did the same. They removed their boots next, dumped the water out, then set the boots upright so the sun would shine into them. Hoss said, \u201cBe right back,\u201d and gingerly walked in his stocking feet, gathering the buckets they\u2019d scattered, along with their fishing poles and hats. He put everything in a pile by the buckboard, figuring their fishing expedition was likely over for the day. The fish he\u2019d caught had been spared during their playful brawl, and still swam safely in a big bucket a few yards away. Hoss was thankful for that. Those fish would taste doggone good come supper time, along with a pile of roasted potatoes, a thick slice of corn bread warm from the oven and slathered with butter, and topped off by a couple of pieces of that peach cobbler he\u2019d seen Hop Sing making after breakfast.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe still got the fish you caught?\u201d Joe asked, as Hoss sat down beside him again.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSure do. Them\u2019s the one thing we didn\u2019t manage ta\u2019 kick ta\u2019 high heaven.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGood, \u2018cause I sure was lookin\u2019 forward to pan fried fish with roasted potatoes, along with some of that peach cobbler Hop Sing was making before we left.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMe too.\u201d Hoss scrunched up his nose. \u201cHey, how\u2019d you know Hop Sing was making peach cobbler?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSmelled the peaches as he was slicing them.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut how\u2019d you know it wasn\u2019t gonna be a peach pie?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cEasy.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh yeah? How?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam likes peach cobbler better than he likes peach pie. And if you haven\u2019t noticed, Hop Sing\u2019s been making all of Adam\u2019s favorites ever since Adam got here.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGuess he has, now that ya\u2019 mention it. Never really noticed before.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s because any food is your favorite.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou wanna be thrown in this creek again, Joseph?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t believe I was thrown. I believe I overpowered you, and we fell in together.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOverpowered me, huh?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSeems like it to me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019d argue that one, but my shirt\u2019s just beginnin\u2019 to dry. Don\u2019t feel like startin\u2019 the process all over again.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMe either.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThis was a lot more fun when we were kids.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat? Taking a tumble into the creek, or sitting in the sun in wet clothes?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBoth.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI agree. Which means, big brother, that we\u2019re either gettin\u2019 old, or we\u2019re gettin\u2019 smart.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMy vote\u2019s on smart.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMine too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam would probably say we\u2019re gettin\u2019old, and that we ain\u2019t got the sense God gave us.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, well, we didn\u2019t ask Adam, now did we?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss chuckled at his brother\u2019s sharp comment. It felt good to spend an afternoon alone with Joe. Since Adam\u2019s arrival, Joe\u2019s time had been taken up with all kinds of learnin\u2019. Not that Hoss wasn\u2019t grateful for what Adam had taught Joe about bein\u2019 blind, because he was. And if Hoss was available, he was always included in anything Joe and Adam did outside those lessons \u2013 like a ride around the Ponderosa, or a fishing trip, or a game of horseshoes with Pa. But Hoss wouldn\u2019t deny that he and Joe had always been close, and had grown even closer after Adam left for sea. They\u2019d worked, lived, and played side by side for a lotta years now. Hoss hadn\u2019t ever pictured it being any different, other than when the day came they each found themselves some pretty little filly to settle down with. But even then, though they\u2019d have their own homes somewhere on the Ponderosa, they\u2019d still work together every day, and likely as not, live close to each other, and their kids would grow up playin\u2019 together, and goin\u2019 to school together, and workin\u2019 on the ranch together, and gathering at their grandpa\u2019s house for dinner after church every Sunday \u2013 probably even be more like brothers and sisters than cousins. Or at least that\u2019s what Hoss had always hoped would be the case. But now, with Joe\u2019s loss of eyesight, Hoss\u2019s assumptions of what the future held were altered, just like he knew Joe\u2019s assumptions of the future had been altered. Exactly what the future would hold, Hoss wasn\u2019t certain, though as much as it saddened him to acknowledge it, Hoss was certain about one thing. Quite likely the future didn\u2019t hold Joe ever working beside him again.<\/span><\/p>\n

If only I hadn\u2019t gone in to get Charlie. Maybe I\u2019d have seen that dadburn cat. Maybe I\u2019d have been able to shoo it outta there, or maybe I\u2019d have been able to catch that bottle \u2018fore it hit the ground, or maybe. . .<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss shook off those thoughts. They\u2019d haunted him every day since the accident. Pa would tell him it was time to put them to rest for good. That he couldn\u2019t have done anything to prevent what happened, and if he had been in the shed with Joe, he might have lost his eyesight too, or been crippled up real bad, or even be dead right now.<\/span><\/p>\n

It was as he was lost in his own silence, that Hoss realized Joe had fallen silent again. Hoss let the silence linger, wanting to see how long it would stretch before Joe finally broke it. But just like prior to their few minutes of horseplay, Joe didn\u2019t seem inclined to speak, or share whatever was bothering him.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy don\u2019t ya\u2019 just come right out and tell me what\u2019s keepin\u2019 ya\u2019 quieter than a mouse that\u2019s been spotted by a rattler?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA mouse that\u2019s been spotted by a rattler, huh? How quiet is that?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPretty dadgum quiet, that\u2019s how quiet. Now come on, just tell me whatever it is you brought me on this fishin\u2019 trip ta\u2019 tell me to begin with.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWho said I brought you fishing to tell you anything?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo one. But between the way Pa and Adam were actin\u2019 before we left, and the way you\u2019ve been actin\u2019 the whole day, I don\u2019t have to be the smartest guy in Nevada to know somethin\u2019s goin\u2019 on.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGood. \u2018Cause you aren\u2019t the smartest guy in Nevada.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNope. I am.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss shook his head while Joe laughed.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re just itchin\u2019 for another dump in this creek, ain\u2019t ya,\u2019 Mr. Wiseguy?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot really. My under drawers are just startin\u2019 to dry.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAll the more reason for ya\u2019 to quit joshin,\u2019 and tell me what\u2019s goin\u2019 on.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

There was a moment of hesitation on Joe\u2019s part, then a slight nod. \u201cYou\u2019re right.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSo what is it?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell. . .uh. . .Adam\u2019s headed back to Boston come Wednesday.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh.\u201d While it wasn\u2019t easy for Hoss to think of Adam leaving, he\u2019d known all along that his older brother would eventually have to return to Boston, and the obligations waiting for him at the blind school. \u201cSure wish he could stay longer.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUh. . .yeah. Me too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut I figured he was \u2018bout done here. He\u2019s taught ya\u2019 an awful lot. Didn\u2019t think there was much left for ya\u2019 to learn.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe chuckled. \u201cWell, I\u2019m sure there are a few things. Or at least Adam would probably say so.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhen it comes to learnin,\u2019 Adam is always one to say a man could do more.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s true.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSo I expect Pa\u2019s takin\u2019 Adam\u2019s leavin\u2019 kinda hard, huh?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI suppose so. But I\u2019m sure he\u2019s been aware all along that Adam didn\u2019t come home to stay.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGuess you\u2019re right about that.\u201d Hoss thought a moment. \u201cMaybe we can have a big send-off for Adam on Tuesday night.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA big send-off?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah. We\u2019ll gather the hands, and roast a steer. Hop Sing can get some of his cousins to come out from Virginia City to help him with the extra cookin\u2019, and we can–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSounds nice,\u201d Joe agreed. \u201cBut. . .uh. . .Hoss, there\u2019s something else I need to tell you about Adam going back to Boston.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s that?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat um. . .that I. . .that I\u2019m going with him.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re what?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m going with him.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh. Well now, don\u2019t guess that\u2019s such a bad idea.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo. You\u2019ll probably like payin\u2019 Boston a visit for a few weeks. Be good for ya\u2019,\u201d Hoss said, while thinking an extended visit East would be good for Joe. It would give him something new to occupy his time with, before returning to the Ponderosa and doing. . .well, Hoss wasn\u2019t sure what, but he figured Pa was probably thinking that over right now, and coming up with things Joe could do that would make him feel useful.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUh. . .yeah, it probably will be good for me. Or at least I hope so, because I\u2019m not. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re not what?\u201d Hoss asked, when Joe let his sentence trail off unfinished.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI. . .Hoss, I\u2019m not going there to visit. I. . .I\u2019m going there to live.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTo live?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut. . .but why, Joe? How come? Why do ya\u2019 wanna do somethin\u2019 like that? How come ya\u2019–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHow come I can\u2019t stay here?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah. How come ya\u2019 can\u2019t stay here? On the Ponderosa with me and Pa?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause I have no purpose here. Because there\u2019s nothing I can do here without my sight.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSure there is.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUh. . .well. . .um. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe smiled. \u201cYou\u2019re just like Pa. You can\u2019t think of anything either.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut. . .but. . .but what are ya\u2019 gonna do in Boston?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTeach.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTeach?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAt Adam\u2019s school.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh. . . I see,\u201d Hoss said quietly. And he did. He didn\u2019t need all the details to know that Joe now possessed skills he could teach to others who\u2019d lost their sight. And he didn\u2019t need all the details to know that Adam had offered Joe, what Joe had desperately wanted ever since going blind \u2013 a way to be useful.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd. . .um. . .you\u2019re gonna leave on Wednesday with Adam?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI am.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss brushed at the sudden moisture that filled his eyes. \u201cGuess. . .\u201d he cleared his throat. \u201cGuess that party I was talkin\u2019 about havin\u2019 for Adam is gonna be for the both of ya\u2019s.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGuess so.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI. . .I know I probably shouldn\u2019t say this, but I don\u2019t want ya\u2019 to go. I can\u2019t lie to ya,\u2019 little brother. I don\u2019t want ya\u2019 to go.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know you don\u2019t want me to go. And in a lot of ways, I don\u2019t wanna go either. But it\u2019s my only chance to make a living. If I can do that, while passing the skills Adam\u2019s taught me on to someone else, then all the better. At least I\u2019ll feel like I\u2019m paying him back for the time he\u2019s put into teaching me. I hope you understand that.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss squeezed his eyes shut so his tears wouldn\u2019t fall. \u201cI do, Joe. Honest I do.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGood.\u201d Joe jostled Hoss\u2019s arm with an elbow. \u201cAnd now I\u2019m gonna make you a promise.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s face swam in and out of focus. \u201cWhat promise?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat if my sight ever does return, I\u2019ll be right back here on the Ponderosa before you can say, \u2018Joe, dadburn yer ornery hide! I\u2019m gonna get you for that.\u2019 \u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss couldn\u2019t help but laugh. \u201cI\u2019ll hold ya\u2019 to it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou can.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss\u2019s smile faded as quickly as it had come. \u201cJoe. . .Joe, I\u2019m really gonna miss ya\u2019.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know,\u201d Joe acknowledge softly. \u201cI\u2019m really gonna miss you too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The brothers sat together on the banks of Walcott Creek until late that afternoon, talking about everything from boyhood exploits, to pranks they\u2019d pulled on Adam over the years, to the times they\u2019d tried their father\u2019s patience just for the fun of it, to places they\u2019d traveled together, and things they\u2019d seen and done. The only subject they didn\u2019t discuss was the one most on their minds \u2013 Joe\u2019s upcoming move to Boston.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

When Hoss finally stood, signaling it was time to head home, their clothes and boots were dry. They pulled their boots on, retrieved their hats, then loaded the buckboard with their gear and Hoss\u2019s bucket of fish.<\/span><\/p>\n

After they arrived at the ranch, Hoss told Joe he didn\u2019t need any help unhitching the horses or unloading the wagon bed. Joe didn\u2019t try to force his help on his brother, seeming to sense Hoss\u2019s need for some time alone.<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss watched until Joe made it safely into the house, then began doing his chores. He swallowed hard and blinked furiously, trying not to think about how much he\u2019d miss his younger brother, and how lonely it would be around the Ponderosa after Joe was gone.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 15<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Joe stared out the window with a blank gaze, only able to imagine what the passing scenery looked like. Adam described things to him from time to time, like the breath-taking view when the train traveled over a trestle bridge high above a rushing river in the Rocky Mountains. Or the burnt reds, dark browns, burnished oranges, and soft yellows of the canyons in Utah territory. Or the way the plains of Nebraska seemed to stretch on and on, like one massive wheat-colored ocean. Still, it wasn\u2019t the same as being able to see those things for yourself.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe truly felt like a blind man now that he was traveling away from everything familiar to him. No longer could he picture the face of someone speaking to him, unless that person was Adam. No longer could he picture the lay of the land. No longer could he picture what the town looked like each time the train stopped at a place he\u2019d never been before. He wouldn\u2019t say it to Adam, but this frightened him, and whenever they got off the train to have a meal, or stretch their legs, Joe kept a firm grip on his brother\u2019s arm. Getting separated from Adam now held prospects far different from getting separated from him in Virginia City, where so many people knew Joe, and someone he trusted would have quickly offered him help.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

As they left the West farther and farther behind, Joe grew increasingly disoriented. The sounds, smells, and accents were different from what he was used to. By the time they\u2019d changed trains in Omaha, and then traveled through Iowa and on into Illinois, where they had an evening layover in Chicago, Joe wasn\u2019t as confident about this move to Boston as he had been just a week earlier. Suddenly, making a living independent of his father\u2019s goodwill didn\u2019t seem nearly as appealing as returning to all that he\u2019d known since childhood. Adam must have sensed some of what Joe was feeling, because as the train chugged past Indiana cornfields Joe longed to be able to see just so he could write Hoss and tell him what a field rich with rows and rows of bright green corn stalks looked like, Adam said, \u201cIt\u2019s not easy making a new start, is it?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe turned toward the sound of his brother\u2019s voice. He hesitated a few seconds before admitting, \u201cIt\u2019s a little harder than I thought it would be. But I\u2019ll be okay.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know you will. Once you get settled and some time passes, Boston will start to feel like home.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe wasn\u2019t certain about that, but he didn\u2019t say so to Adam. He thought back five days to when they\u2019d left Virginia City on a stagecoach bound for Reno, where the first leg of their journey on the Transcontinental Railroad began. So many emotions had assaulted Joe as they headed for Virginia City in a buggy driven by Hoss, that he\u2019d even forgotten to worry that someone he knew might see him. It was his first trip to Virginia City since he\u2019d lost his sight. All too quickly, it became his last trip there, as the stage arrived and Hoss began helping the driver secure Adam\u2019s suitcases, and then Joe\u2019s trunk, to the top.<\/span><\/p>\n

With a mixture of excitement and trepidation, Joe waited to board the stage. If anyone he knew passed him and said hello, Joe didn\u2019t hear the person. He was focused solely on how difficult it would be to say goodbye to Pa and Hoss. Soon, he had no choice but to do just that. Hoss finished with their luggage and stepped forward to tell Adam goodbye. Joe heard a good deal of backslapping going on, along with promises of letters being written more frequently on Adam\u2019s part than they had in recent years, and a promise given by Hoss that he\u2019d come to Boston for a visit with Pa after the cattle drive.<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s goodbye with Pa wasn\u2019t nearly as noisy as his goodbye with Hoss, leaving Joe guessing what their parting entailed. After Adam stepped aside, it was Joe\u2019s turn to say goodbye to his family. As with Adam, Joe\u2019s goodbye with Hoss involved backslapping and promises of being reunited in Boston come fall. Whatever else they might have wanted to say to one another had already been said at Walcott Creek on Saturday. Joe knew Hoss didn\u2019t want him to go, and Hoss knew Joe wouldn\u2019t be going if he still had his eyesight. There was no need to say those things again. It would just make the leaving all that much harder on both of them.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe stepped out of Hoss\u2019s embrace, and into Pa\u2019s. His father didn\u2019t say anything for the longest time, then finally whispered in a choked voice, \u201cTake care of yourself, Joseph.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI will.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cRemember what I said about the Ponderosa always being your home.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI will,\u201d Joe promised again.<\/span><\/p>\n

As Joe stood clutched in his father\u2019s arms, it seemed as though the man couldn\u2019t bear to let him go. Because of that, Joe knew he was the one who had to be strong for Pa, rather than the other way around.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGuess I\u2019d better get on the stage.\u201d Joe did something then that he hadn\u2019t done since he was a boy. He kissed his father\u2019s cheek, tasting the salt of the man\u2019s tears. \u201cI love you, Pa.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

His father could barely speak when he said in return, \u201cI love you too, son.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTake care of Hoss for me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI will.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t let him enter any flapjack eating contests without me here to be his manager.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

That got a chuckle out of Pa. \u201cI won\u2019t.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd don\u2019t let him go off on his own, searching for any little green men, or give his money to the next inventor who comes along promising he can make Hoss fly. And whatever you do, don\u2019t let him buy any Gerby Royals. You know how skittish he is about skinnin\u2019 rabbits when it comes time.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I won\u2019t let him do any of those things, either.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The stage driver called for all passengers to board. The man\u2019s directive made it easier for Joe to move from his father\u2019s embrace and say a final goodbye.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll see you in the fall,\u201d Joe said.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes,\u201d Pa promised. \u201cHoss and I\u2019ll see you then.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIn the meantime, write me every so often and let me know what\u2019s goin\u2019 on around here. Just don\u2019t include anything you don\u2019t want Adam reading to me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Pa chuckled again. \u201cI don\u2019t think we have to worry about that.\u201d Joe could hear his father\u2019s tone change as the sadness crept back in. \u201cGoodbye, Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe held out a hand, and for just a moment was connected to his father again. He squeezed Pa\u2019s hand, said, \u201cBye, Pa,\u201d turned toward where he thought Hoss was standing and said, \u201cBye, Hoss,\u201d then boarded the stage with Adam\u2019s help, not waiting to hear the goodbyes in return.<\/span><\/p>\n

Or maybe not wanting to hear them is a better way of putting it, Joe thought now, as every mile the train traveled brought him closer to Boston, and farther from the Ponderosa.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHmmm?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Without having to be told, Joe knew that when he\u2019d fallen silent, Adam had returned to reading the book he\u2019d brought from their sleeping car a little while ago.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCan I ask you a question?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSure.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Given the noise of the wheels clacking against the tracks, there was no concern about being overheard by any of their fellow passengers sitting nearby.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHow come you never came back home for a visit after you left for sea?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIsn\u2019t not exactly easy to visit when a man\u2019s at sea, Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know that. But I mean afterwards. Once you\u2019d settled in Boston for good. After your grandfather died.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

A long enough silence lingered that once again Joe got the impression some kind of painful memory was tied to Abel Stoddard\u2019s death. But before he could decide whether he should inquire further about the old man\u2019s passing, Adam spoke.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause of Laura Dayton, I never had a strong desire to return.\u201d Joe could tell Adam was smiling just a little bit when he added, \u201cI suppose you could say that I don\u2019t take well to not getting the desires of my heart.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Only Adam would use such flowery language to describe a broken engagement.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cEvidently not,\u201d was all Joe said in regard to his brother\u2019s six-year absence, and the role Laura Dayton played in that.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd then there\u2019s my arm. Or lack of it, I should say. I already told you that I didn\u2019t want you and Hoss to know about it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe nodded.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAside from that, what good was a one-armed cowboy going to be to Pa?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAbout as much good as a blind cowboy, I\u2019d guess.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe. . .Joe, I didn\u2019t mean it that way. I was talking about myself, not you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe smiled his understanding. \u201cI know. But still, it\u2019s true. If it wasn\u2019t, I wouldn\u2019t be on this train with you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd if I haven\u2019t told you that I\u2019m glad you\u2019re on this train with me, then it\u2019s past time I do.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe chuckled. \u201cKeep that in mind after a couple of weeks have passed, and you\u2019re ready to kick me outta your house.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll do that,\u201d Adam droned with that dry wit he possessed.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe listened to the rhythmic \u201cclack clack clack\u201d of the wheels for a few seconds, then said, \u201cYou mentioned a housekeeper?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMrs. O\u2019Connell?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah. Will she mind me being there?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy should she mind?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe shrugged. \u201cI don\u2019t know. Because now she\u2019ll have twice as much work to do.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cFirst of all, she\u2019s hired to do the work. Second of all, I give her a handsome raise each Christmas, along with a generous bonus. And third, you\u2019ll be doing me a favor by being there.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHow?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause now she\u2019ll have someone else to mother besides me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe chuckled again. \u201cAt least it sounds better than being mothered by Hop Sing.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHop Sing doesn\u2019t mother. Or at least not very well.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s what I mean. Might be nice to be mothered for a change.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBe careful what you wish for, Joseph.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIf you say so. Do you have any other hired help?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJust a gardener who attends to my lawn and flowerbeds.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat about at school?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo. Why do you ask?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI thought you had a secretary.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI told you weeks ago that I don\u2019t.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know. I mean before you told me; that\u2019s what I thought. That\u2019s why I quit writing you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPardon?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI thought you were dictating your letters to someone, because the handwriting on the envelopes addressed to Pa had changed. I just. . .I just want you to know why I quit writing.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause you thought I was dictating my personal correspondence to someone?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe nodded. \u201cSeemed kind of. . .I don\u2019t know. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cImpersonal?\u201d Adam chuckled.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah. Impersonal. I didn\u2019t wanna put the time and effort into writing you, if some stranger was writing me back. If I\u2019d have known about your arm. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI made a mistake in not telling you and Hoss.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou had the right to keep it private.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot from my brothers.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Had this conversation taken place before Joe lost his sight, he might have agreed with Adam. But recently, he\u2019d learned a lot about what pride could drive a man to do, and what it could drive him to avoid doing, as well.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou know, it\u2019s kind of funny when you think about it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s kind of funny?\u201d Adam asked.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI was mad because I thought you were dictating your letters to someone, and now when I wanna write to Pa or Hoss, I\u2019ll have to dictate my letters to someone. Guess that just goes to show that there is justice in this world every so often.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t think you deserve to be blind just because you thought I was dictating my letters.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe turned toward the window again, muttering so softly that Adam couldn\u2019t hear him. \u201cSeems as though someone does.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe only half heard Adam say that he should have taught Pa and Hoss to read and write Braille, so Joe could correspond with them privately. Joe mumbled something about Adam not having time to do that. He also wanted to assure Adam it wasn\u2019t anything to fret over, and that it wouldn\u2019t bother him to dictate letters to Adam meant for Pa or Hoss. But suddenly, he couldn\u2019t speak, because he was doubled over with a headache that had come upon him with the kind of swiftness and severity he hadn\u2019t experienced since the first few weeks after losing his sight. An arm grasped Joe\u2019s waist, keeping him from falling to the floor.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe! Joe, what\u2019s wrong?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe clutched his head, grimacing. \u201cHead. . .headache.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPorter! Porter, is there a doctor anywhere on this train?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo!\u201d Joe grabbed a fistful of Adam\u2019s shirt with a trembling hand. \u201cNo. . .no\u00a0<\/span>
\n jus–just help me to our car. I\u2019ll be. . .be okay if I can lay down awhile.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re sure?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe fought the nausea the side to side swaying of the train only made worse. He gave a slight nod, too sick to speak unless he had to.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe. . .?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sure,\u201d Joe mumbled between clenched teeth. He slowly sat upright, hoping he wasn\u2019t being stared at by every passenger in the car, while knowing that he probably was. \u201cJust get me somewhere that I can lay down.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAll right.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe stood when his brother urged him to his feet. It felt like someone was trying to pound his way out of Joe\u2019s head with a sledgehammer, and all he could hear was an odd swooshing sound, like blood rushing between his ears.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe was barely aware of someone hurrying to help Adam. Another arm snaked around his waist, and when he was finally lowered to his bunk in their private sleeping car \u2013 one of only three private cars the train contained \u2013 he heard the voice of their Negro porter, Isaiah.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI see if there be a doctor on board, Mr. Cartwright.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo. . .\u201d Joe ordered with as much strength as he could muster, even though he suspected Adam was the \u201cMr. Cartwright\u201d Isaiah was speaking to. \u201cNo. Be. . .I\u2019ll be okay.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAre you sure, Joe?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sure.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe heard Adam\u2019s frustrated sigh of indecision, then heard him asking the porter to bring a cloth and some ice.<\/span><\/p>\n

The next thing Joe was aware of was the smell of a freshly laundered linen cloth as it passed over his nose, and then the immense relief brought by the ice wrapped within that cloth being pressed against his forehead. Adam had removed his boots and covered him with a blanket, though Joe had no memory of those actions taking place. Either he\u2019d lapsed into unconsciousness briefly, or had been unaware due to the pain lancing through his skull and throbbing behind his eyes.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

It took thirty minutes for the pain to begin to recede. Within an hour, it was almost gone completely, just like Joe could have predicted. He fell asleep shortly after that, and woke up three hours later, hungrier than Hoss had ever thought of being. Adam insisted Isaiah bring a supper cart to their car, even though Joe told his brother that wasn\u2019t necessary, and that he could make the trip to the dining car.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, we\u2019ll eat in here tonight,\u201d Adam said, and Joe decided after the scare he\u2019d given his brother, he wouldn\u2019t cause Adam more grief by arguing with him. Besides, from what Joe could tell, their sleeping car was luxurious, thanks to Pa\u2019s generosity. Therefore, Adam probably didn\u2019t mind remaining in here. It would allow him to read without interruptions. As far as Joe was concerned, it didn\u2019t make much difference where he ate supper, considering everything looked the same to him these days.<\/span><\/p>\n

After the brothers had eaten, and Isaiah had been given a handsome tip for all of his help, Adam settled into an easy chair with a paper he\u2019d purchased from one of the butcher boys that morning. The teenage boys boarded the trains at various stops, walking the aisles carrying baskets filled with candy, gum, cigars, newspapers, magazines, dime novels, toys, bakery goods, and just about anything else they could think of that a train\u2019s passengers might buy. Adam asked Joe if he\u2019d like him to read the newspaper out loud, but Joe said no.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m tired.\u201d Joe stood, feeling his way to the lower bunk. \u201cThink I\u2019ll call it a night.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAre you sure I shouldn\u2019t try and hunt up a doctor to take a look at you?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m fine, Adam. And if you ask me if I\u2019m sure about that fact one more time, I swear I\u2019ll throw you off this train.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat doesn\u2019t sound like an idle threat.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s not. So don\u2019t push your luck.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOkay. But if you have another headache while we\u2019re traveling. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou can hunt up as many doctors as you want to,\u201d Joe conceded, if only to ease the worry in his brother\u2019s voice.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll do just that.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAs long as you pay for his visit, you can do whatever you want to.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSomehow I knew I\u2019d end up getting the short end of this deal.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhich is why you should never insist I do anything I don\u2019t want to.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI shouldn\u2019t have forgotten that particular personality trait of yours.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, you shouldn\u2019t have,\u201d Joe agreed with a laugh.<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s newspaper soon held his attention. After Joe had stripped off his shirt and socks, he slipped onto his bunk, being careful not to whack his head against the frame of the bunk built above it, that was Adam\u2019s.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

As he waited for sleep to claim him, Joe tried to estimate how many miles they\u2019d now traveled from the Ponderosa, while at the same time, silently berating himself for being homesick like some eight-year-old kid who\u2019d never been away from his pa.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 16<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll hire a carriage and see to our luggage. You wait here.\u201d Joe\u2019s hand was removed from Adam\u2019s arm and placed on the back of a bench. \u201cI won\u2019t be gone long.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut –\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJust wait here, Joe. Use this bench as an anchor, like I taught you. I\u2019ll be back in a few minutes.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSure. . .uh, sure. . .okay. But, uh, why don\u2019t I just come with you.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

When no one answered him, Joe questioned, \u201cAdam?\u201d He fought to keep the panic from his voice when he called again, \u201cAdam? Adam!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

When his brother still didn\u2019t answer, Joe knew Adam hadn\u2019t heard him as he rushed off through the crowd.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe already disliked the hustle and bustle of Boston, and he\u2019d only been here fifteen minutes. As he gripped the back of the bench to keep his hand from being jostled free by the people brushing past him, Joe decided the city\u2019s entire population of 400 thousand must be present at the train station this afternoon. He\u2019d thought Virginia City had gotten large in recent years, when her population grew to 30 thousand. But by the noise swelling around him and the heavy footsteps vibrating the wooden platform, Joe could tell Virginia City\u2019s residents were no match for the nearly half a million people who inhabited Boston.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Though he was curious as to why everyone seemed to be in such a hurry, Joe stayed put. Despite his uneasiness at being on his own in a strange city, Joe had no concerns that Adam wouldn\u2019t return for him shortly, just as Adam said he would.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Just remember what Adam taught you. If you have to wait in a large crowd, hang onto a landmark you and your guide have agreed upon ahead of time, then don\u2019t move from that spot until your guide comes for you.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

So, Joe did as his brother instructed. Not because he\u2019d suddenly turned into such an obedient student, but because he had no desire to be lost in Boston.<\/span><\/p>\n

~ ~ ~<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHey, Paddy, see that guy there?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat guy?\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Patrick MacMurray stood on the toes of his worn shoes, straining to see over the crowd. He and his buddy, Rooney Sullivan, hung around the train station several times a week, hustling departing passengers for a few bits to carry luggage, hire a carriage, or give them directions to various places in and around the city. If the day was slow as far as business went, Rooney would pick pockets or grab a lady\u2019s handbag. Patrick had never directly participated in this particular trade, though he always acted as Rooney\u2019s lookout. For his sharp eyes, Patrick earned half of whatever was in the wallet or handbag Rooney snatched. Patrick knew Father O\u2019Brien wouldn\u2019t be approving of a fourteen-year-old boy making money in this fashion, and saints knew Patrick\u2019s mam wouldn\u2019t approve of it at all. Man of the family or not, he\u2019d feel the razor strap more times than he cared to think about if she ever discovered how he came by some of the money he turned over to her at the end of each week. But his father had been dead for two years now, and there were six children younger than Patrick who needed to be fed and clothed. Mam\u2019s salary as a cook for that rich old Mr. Hirsh didn\u2019t make ends meet. Not even when she worked extra hours cooking up all kinds of fancy things for a party, or a holiday dinner.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThe one dressed like a cowboy, standin\u2019 by that bench.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, I see him.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCome on.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019re gonna play a game with him.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGame?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Rooney laughed, his face crinkling in a way that made his freckles seem to dance.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, blind man\u2019s bluff, as ya\u2019 might call it, while I pick his pocket.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Patrick stared at the cowboy a moment. By the uncertainty on the man\u2019s face, and the way he stood frozen in place with his eyes skimming the area but not actually landing on anything, Patrick realized what Rooney had already figured out: That the man couldn\u2019t see.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Patrick shook his head.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cRooney, I don\u2019t think we should. Let\u2019s see what we can hustle up at the other end a\u2019 the platform.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo need ta\u2019 walk all the way down there, mate, when we already got us money to be made right here.\u201d Rooney shagged Patrick by his shirt. \u201cCome on. This\u2019ll be easy as takin\u2019 candy from a baby.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Patrick hesitated, chewing on his lower lip with indecision. He wondered how many years he\u2019d have to spend in purgatory for stealing from a blind man.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPaddy, come on,\u201d Rooney hissed, tugging on Patrick\u2019s shirt again. \u201cThis is a rich one.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHow can ya\u2019 tell?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201c \u2018Cause I got me a nose for the ones with money. Bet his wallet\u2019s full. Think of how much easier things\u2019ll be on both of us next week if we can split ten. . .maybe even twenty dollars \u2018tween us.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Twenty dollars!<\/span><\/p>\n

Patrick couldn\u2019t even imagine what it would feel like to touch twenty dollars, let alone bring that kind of money home to his mam. Money like that would get them through another month, and well into the next one.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

The boy followed his friend on nothing but a promise of the cash they\u2019d acquire by picking the blind man\u2019s pocket. As they silently approached their target, a stab of guilt, along with the thought of the razor strap being whipped across his bum, caused Patrick to hope he\u2019d soon get steady work at the docks, and could then give up hustling with Rooney for good.<\/span><\/p>\n

~ ~ ~<\/span><\/p>\n

It happened so quickly, that Joe didn\u2019t know what was going on until he was traveling away from the bench. Someone had come up to him and put a hand on his back. He\u2019d assumed the person was Adam, and had walked along beside him without question. It wasn\u2019t until \u201cAdam\u201d didn\u2019t respond when Joe had asked twice, \u201cDid you get a carriage?\u201d that Joe realized something was amiss.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam? Adam, I asked if you got a carriage. Adam?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Suddenly, another hand grasped Joe, and he was forced to run between two people. He still had no idea what was going on, and for a few brief seconds, wondered if there was a fire, or some other danger that Adam and someone else was hurrying him away from. But then he heard laughter as a hand slipped into the left pocket of his green jacket. Joe whirled, making a grab for the owner of that hand. He wasn\u2019t quick enough to catch the kid, and by the laughter he knew it was a kid who\u2019d just picked his pocket. Another voice joined the laughter, this one tinged with urgency and fear \u2013\u201cCome on! Let\u2019s go!\u201d \u2013 then footsteps running away from him.<\/span><\/p>\n

If he\u2019d been able to see, Joe would have chased the little rascals down, and then taught them a lesson about stealing they\u2019d never forget. But Joe couldn\u2019t see, and right now the least of his worries was his stolen wallet. He didn\u2019t know how far he\u2019d traveled with the boys, or where the bench was he\u2019d been told to remain by, or if Adam would be able to find him.<\/span><\/p>\n

People jostled Joe as they hurried past him. Four different times he tried to get assistance from some of those people, but never got beyond, \u201cExcuse me, can you. . .\u201d before the person moved on without paying him any mind.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe squelched his fear, knowing it would only make his situation worse. But no matter how hard he tried to remember the things his brother had taught him about navigating in an unfamiliar area, panic caused Joe to revert to ineffective methods. He stumbled, tripped, and helplessly waved his arms in front of him, as he traveled farther and farther away from the bench where he was supposed to be waiting for Adam.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 17<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie\u2019s body swayed back and forth slightly as the carriage came to a halt. She smiled, thinking of how surprised and pleased Adam would be when he saw her father\u2019s coach waiting for him and his brother.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Hopefully, he\u2019ll be even more surprised and pleased to see me.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie silently chuckled at what her father would say to that thought \u2013 that any man who knew what was good for him had better be surprised and pleased to see Edward Brockington\u2019s youngest daughter.<\/span><\/p>\n

The woman leaned forward, placing a hand on her driver\u2019s shoulder.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDo you see him anywhere, Elliot?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The driver turned his head to the side so his voice traveled back to his passenger.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Miss Laddie. But there\u2019s a large crowd moving about. When it thins a bit, I\u2019ll surely spot him.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUnless he\u2019s trying to hire a carriage. Perhaps you should go look for him.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNow, Missy, you know your father wouldn\u2019t approve of me leaving you alone.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cElliot. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t use that tone of voice with me, young woman. I\u2019ve been driving for your father since before you were born. If you think–\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026for one minute that I\u2019m taking orders from you, that override Mr. Brockington\u2019s orders,\u201d Laddie said with a laughing lilt to her voice, \u201cthen you\u2019d better think again.\u201d Now, Laddie did laugh. \u201cReally, Elliot, I\u2019ve heard that so many times I can recite it in my sleep.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen I\u2019d advise you to quit asking me to do things that you know will get us both into trouble with your father.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie gave the man\u2019s shoulder an affectionate squeeze. \u201cI keep hoping you\u2019ll surprise me someday.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAh, fair lass, that will be the day I plan on giving your papa my notice of retirement. But until then, I\u2019ll continue doing as he instructs me to.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re that frightened of my father?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Miss Laddie, it\u2019s not your father I\u2019m frightened of. It\u2019s my dear wife I\u2019m frightened of, whenever I think of arriving home without any money to place in her outstretched hand. And believe me, it\u2019s always outstretched.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie laughed again. For as long as she could remember, Elliot had made jokes about his wife. Laddie didn\u2019t know Mrs. York well. She only encountered the woman each year at the Christmas party her father hosted for his employees and their families. But Mrs. York had always seemed to be a soft-spoken woman, and not nearly as bossy and demanding as Elliot enjoyed leading a person to assume.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPerhaps if you\u2019ll do me just this one favor by going to look for Adam, I\u2019ll forget to mention our conversation to Mrs. York at this year\u2019s Christmas party.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBlackmail doesn\u2019t become you, Miss Laddie, nor will it work. We\u2019ll just wait here a while longer yet and. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

By the way Elliot\u2019s sentence trailed off unfinished, Laddie could tell something had caught his attention.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cElliot? What is it? Do you see Adam?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo. No, I don\u2019t. But there\u2019s a man. . .looks to be a blind man. . .who\u2019s having a difficult time getting around.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDifficult time? Why? What\u2019s wrong?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHe appears to be lost.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie sat forward and craned her neck out the side of the carriage as though she could see the man, too.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s he look like?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA dapper fellow, he is. Though dressed a bit. . .odd.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOdd?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cRather like a cowboy.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA cowboy?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s wearing a cowboy hat and boots, a green jacket, a tan shirt that appears to be made for hard work, and gray dungarees. Poor fellow. He\u2019s really beginning to panic.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie climbed from the carriage, urging her driver to come with her. \u201cTake me to him, please.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMiss Laddie, I don\u2019t think your father would approve of me allowing you to approach a stranger and–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cElliot, from what you\u2019ve said, the man needs help. Besides, I don\u2019t think he\u2019s a stranger.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMiss?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI suspect he\u2019s Adam\u2019s brother.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen where is Mr. Cartwright?\u201d Elliot placed Laddie\u2019s hand in the crook of his left elbow and headed toward the blind man stumbling through the crowd.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s what I intend to find out,\u201d Laddie said, her tone indicating she wasn\u2019t pleased with Adam.<\/span><\/p>\n

Though Laddie was the one using him as a guide, Elliot almost had to run to keep up with her.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHe may not be Mr. Cartwright\u2019s brother at all, Miss.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt doesn\u2019t matter whether he is or not. Either way, from what you\u2019ve described to me, he needs assistance. Now come on, let\u2019s go offer it to him.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Elliot York had no choice but to hurry along beside the young woman. If he got in trouble for this from Mr. Brockington, he wouldn\u2019t hesitate to tell his employer that Laddie inherited her stubbornness and determination from her father.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Maybe it is time for me to retire, Elliot thought with a hint of amusement, as once again, one of Edward Brockington\u2019s daughters talked him into going against instructions.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 18<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSir. Sir, excuse me. May we be of assistance? Sir!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe was so disoriented, that he wasn\u2019t aware of the man trying to gain his attention.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSir! Excuse me, Sir! Do you need help?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

It wasn\u2019t until he felt a touch on his shoulder that Joe swung around, startled and frightened. While a part of him was relieved that someone was finally offering him assistance, Joe also hated himself for feeling so helpless and vulnerable. Yet, didn\u2019t he have a right to feel that way? He was lost in a strange city, and the last time he thought someone was \u201chelping\u201d him, he\u2019d ended up with a stolen wallet, and a fast trip away from the bench where he was supposed to wait for Adam.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSir? May we help you?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUh. . .\u201d Joe took three wary steps backwards to force the man\u2019s hand to drop from his shoulder. \u201cUm. . .I. . .I need to find my brother. I\u2019m looking for my brother.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPerhaps we can be of assistance, then.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe didn\u2019t know who \u201cwe\u201d was. So far, all he\u2019d heard was one man\u2019s voice. Without his eyesight, he wasn\u2019t able to make the assessment vision gives a person when it comes to deciding if you\u2019re comfortable with a stranger, or if that stranger might represent a threat of some sort. Because of that, Joe decided it was best to be upfront and make this person, or persons, aware that he had no money to offer. If nothing else, he might save himself from a beating, if mugging was the only form of \u201chelp\u201d they planned to give.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI can\u2019t pay you. Some boys just stole my wallet.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWho said anything about payment?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe turned toward the sound of a woman\u2019s voice. It was gentle, and held just the correct amount of forthrightness to ease at least some of his fears. Some, but not all. He\u2019d met enough female con artists in his day to know the presence of the fairer sex wasn\u2019t always a guarantee of safety.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMy brother though, he\u2019ll have money,\u201d Joe added hastily, in order to let these people know they\u2019d be paid to assist him if money was what they were after. \u201cHe went to hire a carriage and get our luggage.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAgain, who said anything about payment? My driver and I only want to help you get back where you belong. We\u2019re not seeking a reward.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe remained cautious, not willing to be led any farther away from the bench than he already had been until he felt he could trust these people. By the loud, screeching toot of the train whistle, he knew he was still at the station. If he blindly followed this pair, as the expression so appropriately went, he could be led into even more trouble than he already had.<\/span><\/p>\n

The woman must have sensed his fear, or maybe it plainly showed on his face, because when he didn\u2019t immediately accept the offer of help, she asked, \u201cYou wouldn\u2019t have happened to traveled here from Nevada, would you? From a place called Virginia City?\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s sense of mistrust was heightened once again. How did she know where he was from?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

While Joe was still casting about for an answer that sounded more elusive and clever than, \u201cI might be,\u201d the woman laughed softly and teased, \u201cForgive me, but you\u2019re dressed like you\u2019ve just stepped off the range, if I\u2019m wording that correctly. I have a. . . friend, who\u2019s from Virginia City. My driver and I came here to pick him up. He was traveling with his brother. Adam Cartwright. Do you know him?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Relief washed over Joe. \u201cYeah. Yeah, I do. Adam\u2019s my brother.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The woman\u2019s hand came to rest on Joe\u2019s right forearm, then slid down. She seemed to flounder for a moment as she tried to get her hand in the correct position to shake with him.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou must be Joe. It\u2019s nice to meet you. I\u2019m Laddie Brockington. I work for Adam at the institute.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe gently shook the woman\u2019s hand while tipping his hat with his free hand.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMa\u2019am. Nice to meet you, too. More than you\u2019ll ever know right about now.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The woman laughed again. \u201cOh, I think I know exactly how you\u2019re feeling.\u201d She placed Joe\u2019s hand in a much larger one. \u201cAnd this is my driver, Elliot York. Or better put, my father\u2019s driver, and my babysitter.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe was puzzled by her comment, but didn\u2019t question it. He shook hands with the man.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMr. York. I\u2019m Joe Cartwright.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHello, Mr. Cartwright.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCall me Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Brockington wouldn\u2019t approve of that, Sir.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt wouldn\u2019t be deemed proper.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, as my brother\u2019ll be the first to tell you, I don\u2019t worry too much about what\u2019s proper and what\u2019s not. Like I said, call me Joe. Besides, what do you call my brother?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Cartwright.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cFigures. He always has been the proper one in the family. So see, if you call him Mr. Cartwright, and me Mr. Cartwright, it\u2019ll only confuse everyone. Joe\u2019s fine.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIf you say so, but Mr. Brockington–\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSince I\u2019m not gonna be living with Mr. Brockington, I don\u2019t see why I have to abide by his rules.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI like your style, Joe Cartwright,\u201d Laddie said with a smile in her voice. \u201cI look forward to you and my father meeting. You\u2019ll be a formidable opponent for him, to be certain. My sisters and I, and I dare say my mother as well, will appreciate the entertainment.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe wasn\u2019t sure why this woman, who was Adam\u2019s employee, thought he\u2019d have reason to become acquainted with her father. But on the other hand, since she was here to meet Adam, that likely meant the two of them shared feelings that went a lot deeper than that of employer and employee. Although Adam hadn\u2019t mentioned the woman to Joe, she\u2019d been mentioned in Adam\u2019s letters to Pa on several occasions, so between that, and her presence now, it didn\u2019t take Joe long to figure out there was probably something serious between them. Like what he\u2019d had with Sally Morris until. . .well, it was best not to think about that now. This was a fresh start, and last he\u2019d heard, Carl Jeffers was courting Sally. No doubt they\u2019d probably be married by the time Joe returned to the Ponderosa for a visit.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCome along.\u201d Laddie hooked her arm through Joe\u2019s in a gesture that he knew would have been considered outrageously bold for a single female of her social position, but was acceptable given she was assisting a blind man. \u201cWe\u2019ll return to the carriage and Elliot will look for Adam. Then we\u2019ll find a police officer and report your wallet stolen.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe wasn\u2019t aware that Elliot didn\u2019t immediately leave in search of Adam. Nor did he realize that the man was walking a few steps ahead of them, leading them to the carriage with Laddie\u2019s free hand lightly clasping the driver\u2019s arm.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s probably long gone by now,\u201d Joe said with regard to his wallet. \u201cI think it was a couple of boys. Teenagers, by the sound of their voices.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNonetheless, it should be reported.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhatever you say, Ma\u2019am. Boston\u2019s your home. I\u2019m just visit. . .I\u2019m new here.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie seemed to understand all of Joe\u2019s uncertainties, because she gave his arm a squeeze.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBoston will seem like home in no time, Joe. I realize She hasn\u2019t been very hospitable to you thus far, but you\u2019ll soon be settled at Adam\u2019s, and sitting down to a banquet-sized meal made by Mrs. O\u2019Connell \u2013 the best cook on the East coast, as she\u2019ll tell you every chance she gets. Except it\u2019s true. She is the best cook, and also the best housekeeper. Adam\u2019s always grumbling that he has to continually raise her salary so someone doesn\u2019t snatch her away from him.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe gave an impish grin. \u201cServes him right.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt certainly does.\u201d Laddie chuckled. \u201c I think you and I are kindred spirits where Adam\u2019s concerned.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cKindred spirits?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe think alike.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSounds that way.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCan\u2019t let him be too serious and proper, now can we?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Ma\u2019am.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd speaking of proper, please don\u2019t call me that.\u201d Laddie stopped walking as her hand was placed on the frame of the carriage \u2013 her \u201canchor.\u201d Without interrupting the conversation, Elliot patted her arm, silently indicating he was going to look for Adam. She nodded her agreement to the driver, while speaking to Joe. \u201cMa\u2019am is reserved for my mother. I\u2019m Laddie.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, Ma\u2019. . .all right. . .Laddie. Unusual name, if you\u2019ll excuse me for saying so.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s what I get for being Edward Brockington\u2019s youngest daughter.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPardon?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve been told Papa accepted it well when my eldest sister Helen was born, and then was followed by my sisters Margaret, and Florence. But by the time baby number four arrived, Papa so wanted a boy. It was not to be, however. Therefore, his plan of naming the child, Edward Louis Brockington Jr., changed to naming her Edwina. When baby number five was due a year later, Papa was certain he\u2019d finally have that son he\u2019d been longing for, only to once again become the father of a baby girl. My sister Louisa.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cEdwina and Louisa,\u201d Joe stated. \u201cI suppose that\u2019s about as close to Edward Louis as a person can get, while still giving his daughters girls\u2019 names.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cExactly. And then seven years after Louisa arrived, I was my parents\u2019 \u201cblessed surprise,\u201d as Papa says.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot a bad thing to have your father say about you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, not at all. A very pleasant thing, actually. Though, of course, Papa–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201c. . .wanted a boy,\u201d Joe finished for the woman.<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie smiled. \u201cHe most assuredly did, Joe. During the months my mother was with child, Papa referred to me as his \u201clittle lad.\u201d He was positive that this time, there would be an Edward Louis Brockington Jr. So positive, that he wouldn\u2019t so much as discuss a girl\u2019s name with my mother, let alone choose one. When I was born, and Papa saw that baby number six was also a girl, I\u2019m told he gave up all hope of ever having a son, cradled me in his arms, kissed my forehead, and said, \u2018Girl or not, you\u2019ll always be Papa\u2019s little lad. Laddie. Laddie Rose. A beautiful name for a beautiful girl.\u2019 \u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd it is,\u201d Joe agreed.<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie shrugged. \u201cI\u2019ve grown accustomed to it, let\u2019s put it that way. It was a source of school yard teasing when I was a child, but whenever I\u2019d ask Papa why he couldn\u2019t have given me a real girl\u2019s name, like Catherine or Penelope, he\u2019d remind me that I was his little lad, and that my name was all the more special because of it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSo, did your father ever get an Edward Jr.?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo. I\u2019m the end of the line. Though he does have a grandson named Edward \u2013 Helen\u2019s oldest boy. And Papa has twelve other grandsons too, along with three granddaughters. So what he lacked in sons, he\u2019s more than made up for with grandsons.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019d say so.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd you, Joe? You\u2019re the youngest of three sons from what Adam tells me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah. There\u2019s Adam, then our brother Hoss, then me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam has mentioned you and Hoss to me on several occasions since I\u2019ve known him. He missed you both a great deal.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019ve missed him, too.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd your father. Adam speaks highly of your father also.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOur father deserves to be spoken highly of. He\u2019s a good man. A good Pa to his sons.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI hope I can meet him someday.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI hope you can, too. He and Hoss are planning to come for a visit in the fall.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019ll be wonderful. I\u2019ll look forward to making their acquaintance.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sure they\u2019ll like making yours, as well.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The talk shifted to the school next.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam wrote and told me you\u2019ll be taking a teaching position with us at the institute.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell. . .it\u2019s not for certain just yet. I have to interview with the school board in a few days, and to be honest, I\u2019ve never taught anyone much of anything, if it didn\u2019t have to do with horses, or cattle, or ranching, so I\u2019m not sure–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

A voice filled with anxiety and fear rang out over the crowd, interrupting Joe\u2019s sentence.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe! Joe! Joe, where are you? Joe!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Before Joe could answer, the shouts stopped. Elliot York, drawn by Adam\u2019s frantic calls, hurried up behind the man. He tapped Adam on the shoulder and pointed toward the Brockington carriage, where Laddie and Joe stood together waiting.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 19<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Adam hadn\u2019t been gone from the bench where he\u2019d left Joe for more than ten minutes. He\u2019d hurried to acquire a carriage before they were all spoken for, then helped their porter get the luggage to the carriage. He tipped Isaiah, thanked him for all of his assistance, told the carriage driver, \u201cI\u2019ll be back in a minute,\u201d and went to retrieve Joe.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

As he approached the bench, Adam couldn\u2019t see Joe. He wasn\u2019t concerned at first, assuming Joe had sat down, and the people milling about were blocking his view of his brother. But as he got closer and saw the bench was empty, Adam was momentarily confused. He looked around, wondering if he\u2019d come to the wrong place. But when he glanced up and saw the wooden sign that read, Beacon Hill Exit, Adam knew this was where he\u2019d left his brother. He stopped and stood on the tips of his boots, sure he\u2019d spot Joe somewhere nearby. But when he didn\u2019t see a beige cowboy hat \u2013 and there surely couldn\u2019t be more than one of those in Boston at the moment \u2013 a fist of fear socked Adam in the stomach.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe!\u201d Adam stayed on his toes, scanning the area. \u201cJoe! Hey, Joe! Joe!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The man didn\u2019t care if he was making a spectacle of himself as he started shagging people down and asking if they\u2019d seen a blind man wearing a cowboy hat and a green jacket. Adam got a variety of responses, ranging from a few polite, \u201cNo, Sir. I\u2019m sorry, I haven\u2019t,\u201d to a growled, \u201cLeave me alone!\u201d to numerous people giving him a wide berth, no doubt wary of his frantic demeanor.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

As Adam swam through the crowd, his eyes searching for a cowboy hat or flash of green material, his mind traveled back to the time when Joe was five, and he\u2019d lost track of the kid at a traveling carnival show passing through Virginia City. Marie had been dead just a few months, and this was the first real outing their father had felt up to taking them on since her passing. While Pa did some errands around town, the boys explored the carnival\u2019s grounds. Adam and Hoss were soon drawn to a target shooting game. Adam laid down ten cents so he and Hoss could play. The last thing he\u2019d said to Joe before turning to take his first shot was, \u201cYou stand right here behind Hoss and me. We\u2019ll be done in a few minutes.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

When their game was over and they\u2019d turned to collect Joe and leave, the kid was gone. Adam\u2019s heart was stuck in his throat the entire time they spent looking for the boy. He dreaded the thought of having to find Pa and confess that he\u2019d lost Little Joe. But he\u2019d just about run out of other options, when Hoss spotted Joe seated on the back of a sideshow wagon between the Fat Lady and the Bearded Lady. The kid was having a grand time, eating a bag of candy while regaling his audience with some kind of tall tale that had them laughing.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

For the first time in his life, Adam understood why a parent was sometimes torn between giving his child a licking, and giving him a hug. In the end, Joe got a hug. In part, because Adam knew he shouldered most of the blame for the child disappearing in the first place. After all, he was seventeen, to Joe\u2019s five, and Pa had put Adam in charge of his brothers, making Adam promise to keep an especially close eye on Little Joe. And in part, because if a licking was needed in the Cartwright household, it was Pa who administered it. Not Adam, not a hired hand, not Hop Sing, and not even their foreman, Byron, who was like a brother to Pa. Pa had always been firm about this rule, saying he would handle the discipline as he saw fit where his sons were concerned. He tended to \u201cspare the rod,\u201d more than most fathers, not that Adam was complaining. Although while he hugged Joe, Adam thought his brother shouldn\u2019t be spared the rod this time. He even said as much, then tried not to laugh as Joe put up a loud protest. Hoss soon joined in, reminding Adam that he\u2019d been the one in charge, and if, \u201cYou\u2019re gonna tell Pa on Little Joe, you might as well tell \u2018im on yourself, Adam. If Joe\u2019s gonna git a lickin\u2019 outta this, then you deserve one too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m seventeen \u2013 almost eighteen \u2013 and leaving for college in the fall,\u201d Adam had reminded Hoss, with a grownup air of superiority.<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss, who despite just celebrating his twelfth birthday the previous week, proved himself wise beyond his years, as he often did when you least expected it.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI bet it won\u2019t much matter ta\u2019 Pa if you are almost eighteen. Losin\u2019 track a\u2019 Little Joe, just \u2018cause you wanted ta\u2019 do some target shootin,\u2019 seems like a pretty serious offense ta\u2019 me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah,\u201d Joe piped up, from where he now stood in-between his brothers. \u201cSeems like a pretty serious offense to me, too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam scowled down at the child. \u201cYou don\u2019t even know what the word offense means.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDo too. Pa told us, didn\u2019t he, Hoss?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSure did. A few weeks back, when it was one a\u2019 them there vocabulary words I had ta\u2019 define for school.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam glared at Hoss. \u201cWell, I didn\u2019t hear you turning me down when I offered to pay for that round of target shooting.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoss gave his brother a smug smile in return. \u201cYeah, but I wasn\u2019t the one in charge a\u2019 Little Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah,\u201d Joe grinned, \u201che wasn\u2019t the one in charge a\u2019 me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBe quiet,\u201d Adam ordered, for lack of anything else to say. As they walked away from Joe\u2019s new friends, Adam bartered, \u201cI\u2019ll tell you what. You share your candy with us, and I won\u2019t mention any of this to Pa. Deal?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe held up his bag so Adam and Hoss could each take a handful. \u201cDeal.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhere\u2019d you get it from, anyway?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThe Fat Lady. She said I could have it, \u2018cause she needs to go on a diet.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

All three boys found that funny, and soon who was or wasn\u2019t at fault over Joe\u2019s disappearance, was forgotten as the brothers spent the rest of the day touring the carnival grounds.<\/span><\/p>\n

This time I probably won\u2019t get lucky enough to find him sitting safely between a fat lady and a lady with a beard. Come on, Joe. Where are you? Why the hell didn\u2019t you stay put like I told you to?<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Just as Adam called for Joe one last time, and then decided he\u2019d better find a policeman to assist him in his search, someone tapped him on the shoulder. He turned, surprised to see Elliot York standing behind him. His eyes followed the direction Elliot pointed toward, first widening with relief when he saw Joe, then narrowing with anger as he marched for the Brockington carriage.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 20<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

A hand grabbed Joe\u2019s arm and swung him around.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhere have you been?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe never had taken well to Adam using that accusatory, big brother tone with him, and no amount of age or maturity would likely ever change that fact. Therefore, Joe\u2019s temper blew before he had time to remember that there was a woman standing next to him.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhere I\u2019ve been is all over this train station, thanks to you!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

As had been the case all of their lives, Adam\u2019s response to Joe\u2019s temper was to display his own.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThanks to me? All I asked was that you stay put! All I asked was that you wait for me like I taught you to. But no! You have to go running off, just like that time when you were five and–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIf by running off you mean having my wallet stolen by a couple of kids and–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell you shouldn\u2019t have tried to chase them down! You shouldn\u2019t have left that bench, Joe! How many times do I have to tell you–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t chase them down! They–\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t care what they did! You\u2019re blind now, Joe! You\u2019re blind, and you\u00a0<\/span>
\n can\u2019t–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWow, Adam, thanks for that information. I wouldn\u2019t have known I can\u2019t even see my own hand in front of my face if you hadn\u2019t just announced it to everyone in Boston!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLook, all I asked was that you stay put. Maybe bringing you here was a mistake.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe it was! So far your precious Boston hasn\u2019t been very welcoming. Maybe I should just go home.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe you should!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen I will!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGood! I\u2019ll buy you a ticket and put you on the next train if that\u2019s what you want!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s what I want!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAll right then–\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGentlemen.\u201d Laddie interrupted the heated tirade before the brothers made decisions they\u2019d both regret. \u201cGentlemen, please. The two of you are behaving worse than even the most unruly boys who have passed through my classroom. I\u2019d make you both serve detention during recess if I thought it would do any good, but you\u2019d likely just start brawling again the minute you were left unattended.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie\u2019s voice reminded the Cartwright brothers that first and foremost, a lady was present, and second, that she was right. They were acting like a couple of unruly kids, as opposed to acting like grown men, and brothers to boot.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe was the first to apologize.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSorry, Ma\u2019am.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, I apologize, too,\u201d Adam said. \u201cYou shouldn\u2019t have been subjected to\u00a0<\/span>
\n our. . .brotherly disagreement.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cRemind me to put Papa in a room with the two of you sometime. It will make him thankful that he had all girls.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe chuckled. \u201cYeah, it sure will.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam smiled. Like Joe, the worse of his anger had passed, thanks to Laddie. \u201cOur pa would wholeheartedly agree with that. As a matter of fact, on some days, he\u2019d probably be eager to trade your father boys for girls, and not care that he ended up with three extra children in the bargain.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAfter being privy to your rather. . .loud discussion, I can understand why,\u201d Laddie said. \u201cAnd now, how about if we set aside the harsh words and accusations, and take our leave. There\u2019s no use in staying here longer and drawing a crowd with your shouts. Joe, in the morning, if you still want to go home, Adam can buy you a ticket. But you\u2019ll need a traveling companion, so until that can be arranged, I\u2019m afraid you\u2019re stuck here in Boston.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Properly chastised, Joe blushed. \u201cI. . .I\u2019ll probably stay a while, if Adam\u2019ll still have me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll still have you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGood,\u201d the woman acknowledged. \u201cThen that foolishness is settled. I don\u2019t know about the two of you, but I\u2019m looking forward to the supper Mrs. O\u2019Connell will have waiting for us. Why don\u2019t you and Elliot get the luggage, Adam, then we\u2019ll be on our way.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat sounds like a good idea. Elliot, it\u2019s back over there. Our luggage is already loaded on a carriage, but I can hire a porter to help us transfer it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cVery good, Mr. Cartwright.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam turned around and ordered pointedly, \u201cAnd you two stay right there. I mean it, Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe took a step forward, only to have Laddie grab his arm and say softly as Adam left with Elliot, \u201cLet him have the last word, Joe.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause he\u2019s the oldest, and it\u2019s important to him.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAll the more reason why I shouldn\u2019t let him have the last word.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie chuckled at Joe\u2019s stubbornness. \u201cDo you two butt heads like this often?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOn a fairly regular basis, yeah. Why? Don\u2019t sisters argue?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh, we do, though not with quite as much. . .gusto.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGusto.\u201d Joe smiled at the word. \u201cThat\u2019s a good way to put it. Adam and I have always had a lot of gusto behind our disagreements.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAh, I see.\u201d Laddie\u2019s tone spoke of her understanding. \u201cThe typical clashes that occur between the eldest and the youngest, is that it?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI guess so, because Hoss and I rarely get into it, and the same goes for Hoss and Adam.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHelen and I often have the same difficulties. She\u2019s fourteen years my senior, and sometimes forgets that it\u2019s been a good many years since I\u2019ve been in need of a second mother. Much like I\u2019m sure Adam sometimes forgets that you no longer need a second father.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cExactly.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie patted Joe\u2019s arm. \u201cSee. I told you we\u2019re kindred spirits. This just proves it all the more.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause we both have bossy older siblings?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie laughed. \u201cYes, because we both have bossy older siblings, though I think we\u2019d better keep that between us.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSince I\u2019m relying on Adam\u2019s generosity in order to have a roof over my head, I think you\u2019re right.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

When Adam and Elliot returned with a porter pushing their luggage on a wooden cart, Adam asked, \u201cWhat are you two finding so funny?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh, nothing,\u201d Laddie replied. \u201cWe were just talking about how grateful we are for our older siblings.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, Adam,\u201d Joe smiled. \u201cThat\u2019s what we were talking about.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUh huh,\u201d Adam said knowingly. \u201cI\u2019m sure you were. For some reason, I get the impression that the two of you together spells nothing but trouble for me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh now, come on, older brother, what would give you that idea?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJust a feeling I have, younger brother, let\u2019s put it that way.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The teasing ended once the luggage was secured. Adam tipped the porter, thanked him, and helped Laddie into the carriage. He then placed a hand on Joe\u2019s elbow.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOne step up, Joe, then turn to your right, and you\u2019ll feel the seat against the backs of your knees.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Once the trio was settled, Elliot climbed onto the driver\u2019s perch.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTo your home, Mr. Cartwright?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, Elliot, to my home.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cVery good then.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Elliot gave the horse a light slap with the reins and ordered, \u201cGiddy up.\u201d The carriage moved forward, its driver steering it toward Beacon Hill, and the sumptuous house where Adam Cartwright resided.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 21<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Joe gave his mouth a final wipe with the linen napkin, then placed it on his empty dessert plate. He\u2019d barely sat back in his chair before a pair of chubby arms swooped in and whisked the plate away.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWould yeh like another spot of coffee, Joseph?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Despite the headache beginning to throb behind his eyes, Joe smiled. He\u2019d only known Mrs. O\u2019Connell a couple of hours, but Adam claimed she was already spoiling him. And admittedly, she was. She\u2019d taken to Joe the moment he walked in the door and Adam introduced him.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMrs. O\u2019Connell, this is my brother Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNice ta\u2019 make yer acquaintance, Mr. Cartwright.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLikewise, Ma\u2019am.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Cartwright has spoken of yeh to me on many occasions, Mr. Cartwright.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sure he has.\u201d Joe gave a sly smile. \u201cAnd probably hasn\u2019t told you anything good, either.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCome now, Mr. Cartwright, don\u2019t yeh jest like that. Mr. Cartwright never has anything but kind words and praise fer his family, he does.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re obviously confused, Mrs. O\u2019Connell. I\u2019ve always had kind words and praise for my brother Hoss, and my father. As for this scamp, now that\u2019s another story.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe pictured Bridget O\u2019Connell shaking a scolding finger at Adam.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s a falsehood if I ever heard one, Adam Cartwright. Yeh should be ashamed of yerself fer teasin\u2019 yer dear brother like that.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, Adam,\u201d Joe quipped. \u201cYou should be ashamed of yourself for teasing me like that.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe was jostled forwarded by a brotherly elbow thrust into his ribs.<\/span><\/p>\n

Mrs. O\u2019Connell went on as though she hadn\u2019t seen the horseplay.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy, he reminds me of me own dear brother Joseph. Gone from this earth fer just a year now, may his sweet soul rest in peace.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHe was as big a scoundrel as the day is long,\u201d Adam mumbled into Joe\u2019s ear, while Mrs. O\u2019Connell continued to lament over her departed sibling. \u201cAlways in debt to someone over scams that went sour, and then always coming around here to beg money from Mrs. O\u2019Connell. That is, when he was sober enough to find his way.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe would have laughed at his brother\u2019s words, if it hadn\u2019t sounded like poor Mrs. O\u2019Connell was on the verge of tears. He could picture her dabbing at her eyes with a dishcloth, or perhaps with the corner of her apron. For that reason, Joe was just beginning to realize how perceptive a blind person could be if he only listened carefully to what was happening around him.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell now, enough of me goin\u2019 on about me own heartaches as though I\u2019ve never had a sunny day. As me precious mam was fond of sayin,\u2019 \u2018There\u2019s always another poor bloke who\u2019s got worse troubles, Bridget, so bear that in mind the next time yeh go to feelin\u2019 sorry fer yerself.\u2019 \u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, Ma\u2019am. That\u2019s good advice.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The woman patted Joe\u2019s arm. \u201cAh, but yeh are a sweet lad, aren\u2019t yeh.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe turned to Adam and smiled. \u201cYes, Ma\u2019am. My brother Adam here is always saying that very thing.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhile trying not to choke at the same time,\u201d Adam muttered.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh you boys.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes,\u201d Laddie echoed the housekeeper, \u201coh you boys. I get the impression this will go on all evening if we allow it to, Mrs. O\u2019Connell. However, I\u2019m sure their father would say it\u2019s past time their quarreling ends. Would you like some help in the kitchen while Adam familiarizes Joe with the house?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat I would, Miss Laddie. I thank yeh, I do.\u201d The housekeeper addressed the men next. \u201cMr. Cartwright, why don\u2019t yeh show Mr. Cartwright to his room. I have it prepared fer him just like yeh asked me to.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Before Adam could answer the woman, Joe made the same request of her that he\u2019d made of Elliot.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMrs. O\u2019Connell, please call me Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAw no, Mr. Cartwright. No. I canna\u2019 do that.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t tell me, let me guess. It\u2019s not proper.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Sir, it\u2019s not. It\u2019s not at all proper for a housekeeper to call her employer\u2019s guests by their first names. Me dear mam taught me that long before God saw fit to put yeh on this earth, lad.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWould it be proper if I give you permission? Like I told Elliot, it\u2019s gonna get pretty confusing around here now that there\u2019s two Mr. Cartwrights in the house.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI \u2018cpect so, but still–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen please. Joe will be fine.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt just doesn\u2019t seem right, me callin\u2019 yeh Joe. Guess I could call yeh\u2019 Mr. Joe, like I call this fine lass here Miss Laddie \u2013 with her permission, a\u2019 course \u2013 but fer some reason I just don\u2019t like the sound of it.\u201d The woman thought a moment, then brightened. \u201cBut Joseph. I could call yeh Joseph.\u201d Mrs. O\u2019Connell turned to Adam. \u201cDoes that sound proper enough, Mr. Cartwright?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s smile held a hint of mischief. He knew how much Joe would hate being addressed as Joseph on a continual basis.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, I do. I think it holds just the right amount of propriety. Mrs. O\u2019Connell, you have my permission to address my brother as Joseph from now on.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe shot Adam a dirty look. Or at least he hoped it went in Adam\u2019s direction, as opposed to being seen by one of the women.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoseph. Just like me own dear brother Joseph. Is that all right with yeh, Joseph?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe gave the woman a weak smile. \u201cUh. . .sure. Sure, that\u2019s fine.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBy the look on yer face, I can see no one calls yeh that very often. A shame too, bein\u2019 it\u2019s such a nice, manly name.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Ma\u2019am. My pa\u2019s about the only one who calls me Joseph, and then only when he\u2019s mad at me, or trying to make me see his side of an argument. . .or telling me to take my feet off the furniture.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOr worried about him,\u201d Adam murmured to Laddie, though not softly enough that Joe didn\u2019t overhear.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe didn\u2019t have a chance to dispute his brother\u2019s comment, because Elliot came in with some of the luggage. The next few minutes were spent getting things unloaded from the carriage. Elliot followed Mrs. O\u2019Connell, carrying the luggage to the appropriate rooms. He then made his leave, telling Laddie he was going home for supper.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cShall I return for you at nine, Miss Laddie?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat will be fine, Elliot. Thank you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

After Elliot left, Laddie went to the kitchen with Mrs. O\u2019Connell, while Adam familiarized his brother with the house. Although the method of learning each room didn\u2019t differ from what Adam had taught Joe on the Ponderosa, this was the first time Joe had the opportunity to use his skills in a house foreign to him.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLet me draw you a map first, Joe. Give me your hand.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe presented his left palm to Adam. As Adam\u2019s index finger traced the layout of the parlor, while at the same time he verbally described the room, Joe tried to visualize what it looked like. When Adam\u2019s \u201cdrawing\u201d was completed, he asked, \u201cReady to take a tour?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI think so.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe did as Adam had taught him, protecting his face with his right arm while his left hand slid slowly along the wall. Adam walked behind, only stopping their progress if Joe came to a piece of furniture he was in danger of toppling over.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re coming to the fireplace now, Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAll right.\u201d Joe\u2019s hand brushed against the mantel. \u201cI feel it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTake five steps to your right so you don\u2019t trip over the hearth.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOkay.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s hand slid along the mantel, bumping against the corner of a large picture frame that seemed to be hanging on the chimney.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA portrait of my grandfather,\u201d Adam supplied.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe nodded. He\u2019d never met Abel Stoddard, and had no idea what he looked like. Someday he\u2019d ask Adam to describe the man in both physical appearance and personality, but for the time being, he set his curiosity aside and continued his travels. When Joe\u2019s hand encountered a smaller frame residing on the mantel, Adam said, \u201cThe picture of the four of us that was taken shortly before I went to sea.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe nodded again. This time he was able to easily visualize what the people in the photograph looked like.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOkay, now stop and bend down while holding out your left hand.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJust do it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe heard the smile in his brother\u2019s voice. When he felt soft fur, and then a wet tongue licked his hand, Joe smiled, too.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA dog? You have a dog?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, it\u2019s not a bearskin rug, that\u2019s for certain. Joe, meet Shakespeare.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cShakespeare?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe crouched beside the dog for a moment, stroking his large head and feeling the heat from his panting breath.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Shakespeare, huh? Leave it to Adam to be courting a woman with a dog\u2019s name, and to own a dog named for a dead guy who wrote boring books.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Joe wisely kept those thoughts to himself as he stood and navigated around the animal.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat kind of a dog is he?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGerman Shepherd.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe wasn\u2019t familiar with the breed, though he had seen a picture of one a year or so ago in the Territorial Enterprise.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBig dog.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes,\u201d Adam acknowledged. \u201cHe probably weighs ninety pounds. Maybe a little more. But don\u2019t worry, he\u2019s gentle.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDidn\u2019t think you\u2019d tell me to bend down and pet him if he was gonna take my hand off.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam chuckled. \u201cTempting thought though it is, no, I wouldn\u2019t have.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The dog remained where he was, lounging next to the fireplace hearth, as Adam and Joe moved on.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019re going to walk across the foyer now, then we\u2019ll be in the dining room. The foyer is all that separates the dining room from the parlor.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAll right.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

When the men reached the dining room, the process of Adam drawing a map on Joe\u2019s hand was repeated, then Joe navigated around the long table that sat eight, and had been carved from cherry wood by a craftsman in Scotland. Adam said the tablecloth, wispy and delicate to Joe\u2019s touch, was purchased in Japan by his grandfather, and that the heavy window tapestries came from India. Just like in the parlor, a large rug Abel Stoddard had brought back from the Orient covered a good portion of the dining room floor.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s hands explored the buffet, and the china cabinet mounted on top of it, before the brothers continued their journey. Joe got acquainted with the kitchen, then the summer kitchen where the women were cooking supper, and after that, the back porch that ran the length of the house. The gardener Adam employed maintained the yard, flowerbeds, birdbaths, birdfeeders, and flower-lined paths of the three acres that sprawled behind the home, and were surrounded by a black wrought-iron fence. Adam promised he\u2019d take Joe for a walk around the grounds the next day. The chirping of the birds, and the mixture of pleasant scents created by the flowers, made Joe decide this porch, with its comfortable furniture and overhead roof that shaded it from the hot sun, would be a favorite spot of his.<\/span><\/p>\n

The men traveled back through the two kitchens to Adam\u2019s study. This big room was in front of the dining room, and included a bay window.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThe window overlooks the front lawn and street. We\u2019re about twenty feet off the ground, as you probably noticed when we climbed up the front walkway. The house is built on a hill.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThus the name Beacon Hill,\u201d Joe said.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re smarter than you look sometimes.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMy oldest brother has been known to admit that every so often.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cReluctantly, I\u2019m sure.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sure too,\u201d Joe laughed.<\/span><\/p>\n

At Adam\u2019s encouragement, Joe picked up and shook a set of maracas, hearing the \u201ccha cha cha,\u201d rhythm the seeds inside made. As with other rooms in the home, Adam said that many of the items on the study\u2019s bookshelves, and hanging on its walls, were collected by his grandfather during his years of travel to foreign ports. The massive desk sitting several feet in front of the window was made from mahogany wood Abel Stoddard had purchased in South America.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s hand ran over rows and rows of leather bound books as he finished his tour.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAre these all yours, or were some of them your grandfather\u2019s?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThe majority of them are mine, along with a few that Grandfather said belonged to my mother.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The rich, mingling smells of mahogany and leather made Joe think of Adam. The room seemed to define his brother, and Joe could picture the hours Adam spent in here, seated behind the desk doing paperwork that he\u2019d brought home from the institute, or sitting in the chair by the corner fireplace reading a book.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

The only room on the main floor Joe didn\u2019t tour belonged to Mrs. O\u2019Connell. It was located off the kitchen, and from what Joe gathered based on Adam\u2019s description, was similar in size and comforts to the room Hop Sing had on the Ponderosa.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019re going to walk back through the dining room, Joe, and then the length of the foyer until we reach the stairway that\u2019ll take us to the second story.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAll right.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Just as the toe of Joe\u2019s right boot had knocked against the bottom stair, Laddie called from the dining room, \u201cSupper will be on the table in twenty minutes, Adam!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019ll be there. Thank you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re welcome.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe heard the woman\u2019s light footsteps move off toward the back of the house.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOkay, Joe, fourteen steps straight up. There\u2019s no landing like at home until you reach the top. The railing is on your right.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe nodded, proceeding up the stairs with Adam following him. He toured the four bedrooms the upper story contained. When they reached the room that would be Joe\u2019s for as long as he lived here, Adam encouraged him to take his time exploring it.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI hope it\u2019s to your liking,\u201d Adam said, as Joe walked the perimeter of the room with his left hand brushing against the wall.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s fine. Real nice. Thanks.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

And it was nice from what Joe could tell. A Hoss-sized four-poster bed sat in the center of the room. There were two large windows that allowed fresh air to flow freely throughout. A chest containing six drawers for clothing, along with a closet, resided on one wall, a small desk with a chair resided on another. The washstand with pitcher and bowl were next to the bed.<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam reached Joe\u2019s hand upward until he encountered a brass fixture mounted on the wall.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGas lights throughout the house. There\u2019s no need to carry a kerosene lamp from room to room.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDoesn\u2019t make any difference,\u201d Joe did his best to joke, \u201csince I don\u2019t have much need for lights these days.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I guess you don\u2019t,\u201d Adam agreed in the same light tone Joe had used.<\/span><\/p>\n

The last room the brothers\u2019 toured was two doors down from Joe\u2019s, and across the hall.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThis is the lavatory.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLavatory?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat you\u2019d know as the water closet.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

This was the only room Adam didn\u2019t map out on his brother\u2019s hand.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGo ahead and explore it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAren\u2019t you gonna explain the layout to me?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo. I\u2019ll be right behind you. Go ahead and see what you think of it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, it\u2019s just a water closet. I–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Instead of scolding Joe for not exploring the room as he\u2019d been taught, Adam laughed when Joe\u2019s knees rammed into an object Joe couldn\u2019t identify.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat the heck is this?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTo put it delicately, it\u2019s a one seater.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA one. . .\u201d Joe turned in the direction of his brother\u2019s voice, certain the confusion on his face was plain for Adam to read. \u201cYou mean it\u2019s like. . .it\u2019s an outhouse, in the house?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s what I mean. It\u2019s called a commode.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut how does it work?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThe. . .uh. . .execution of using it isn\u2019t any different from what you\u2019re used to at home. But by pulling this chain when you\u2019re finished,\u201d Adam guided Joe\u2019s hand upward until it was wrapped around a wooden handle hanging from a chain, \u201cyou flush away the waste.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd it goes where?\u201d Joe asked, with a good deal of trepidation.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThrough underground pipes until it reaches Boston\u2019s sewer plant.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd I can use it any time I want. . .\u201d Joe blushed, \u201cI mean, any time I need to?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam laughed. \u201cYes, any time day or night. Just remember to put the seat down when you\u2019re done, or you\u2019ll hear about it from Mrs. O\u2019Connell.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

It would take Joe a day or two to understand what Adam meant, but for now, he just said, \u201cAll right.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe found the washstand next, jumping back when Adam turned on a faucet that made water shoot into the marble sink.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t have to pour it in from a wash pitcher?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe felt around.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhere\u2019s the pump?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThere isn\u2019t one. The house has a water tank.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe next allowed Adam to lead him to what felt like a massive square wooden box surrounding smooth porcelain. As his hands explored it, his face lit up.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s a bathtub.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat it is.\u201d Joe\u2019s hands were moved to the front of the tub. \u201cHere\u2019re the faucets.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou can just turn one of these on, and water\u2019ll run in the tub?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYep. The right one is hot water; the left one is cold. Just make sure you have this plug in the drain before you turn the faucets on. When you\u2019re finished bathing and want to let the water out, you pull the plug.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd you don\u2019t have to heat the water on the kitchen stove?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHow\u2019s it get hot then?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s heated by the natural gas that\u2019s piped into the house.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe grinned as he straightened. \u201cHoss would love this.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019d probably never get him to come out of here, would we?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot for the better part of a day, that\u2019s for sure.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam showed Joe how to regulate the water so he wouldn\u2019t burn himself, then led him to the bureau that contained towels, wash clothes, and bed linens. From there, they walked the few steps to the dirty clothes bin.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou can put anything you need laundered in here. Mrs. O\u2019Connell empties it every Tuesday, bundles it all together, and leaves it on the back porch for the laundry boy. Everything we send out is returned to us on Friday.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAll right. Let me know what I owe you for it. And anything else, like food\u00a0<\/span>
\n and–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not going to charge you for food. And as for the cost of the laundry, we\u2019ll worry about that after you start working at the institute.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, I can pay my own way.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know you can, and you will after you start working. For now it\u2019s not important.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, allow me to assure you that money isn\u2019t an issue here. You\u2019re my brother. I\u2019m not doing anything for you that you wouldn\u2019t do for me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know but–\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUnless you want Laddie upset with us, I\u2019d advise you to drop it before we start arguing again.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

In deference to the woman who\u2019d helped him at the train station, Joe conceded.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOkay, okay, I\u2019ll drop it. But just as soon as I\u2019m earning a weekly salary, you\u2019re taking some money from me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam put his arm around Joe\u2019s shoulders and led him from the room.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoseph, I\u2019ve been waiting twenty-nine years to hear you volunteer to give me money without me having to hang you upside down by your ankles and shake it out of your pockets. Believe me, it\u2019ll be a pleasure.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sure it will be,\u201d Joe said in the same dry tone Adam was fond of using.<\/span><\/p>\n

The men had returned downstairs to find a table laden with so much food that even Hoss couldn\u2019t have finished it all. Or at least not in one sitting, Joe said to Adam and Laddie as yet another dish was passed to him.<\/span><\/p>\n

When dessert was finished and Mrs. O\u2019Connell offered Joe that additional \u201cspot\u201d of coffee, he politely refused.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo no. I\u2019ve had all I can hold. Everything was very good. Thank you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYer welcome, Joseph. It\u2019s a pleasure ta\u2019 cook for someone who appreciates me efforts.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI appreciate your efforts,\u201d Adam told the woman.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOne wouldn\u2019t know it by the lack of kind words yeh bestow.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m kind to you!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot as kind as Joseph. Yeh could learn a thing or two from yer brother, Adam Cartwright. A \u201cplease\u201d and \u201cthank you\u201d ever\u2019 so often does a woman\u2019s heart good.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Mrs. O\u2019Connell marched from the room with a \u201chuff,\u201d Adam calling after her, \u201cMrs. O\u2019Connell! Mrs. O\u2019Connell, if you think I don\u2019t shower you with enough kind words, then you can just go down the street and work for Jackson Prewitt. Then you\u2019ll find out just how kind I am.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI just might do that!\u201d came from the kitchen.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen farewell!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd farewell to yeh too!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie leaned close to Joe. \u201cDon\u2019t worry, they do this all the time. It doesn\u2019t mean a thing. They\u2019re like an old married couple who wouldn\u2019t be happy unless they had at least one good argument a day.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m beginning to get that impression.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat are you two whispering about?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh nothing,\u201d Laddie said with a smile in her voice. \u201cNothing at all.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNothing, Adam,\u201d Joe assured. \u201cSo much of nothing, that I\u2019m going to excuse myself and call it a night.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s only seven-thirty, Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cFeels more like midnight to me for some reason.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTraveling will do that to a person. Do you need my help finding your room?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I\u2019ll be fine. I know where it is.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAll right.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe heard chairs being pushed away from the table as he stood, then his brother bid him, \u201cGoodnight.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201c \u2018Night, Adam.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGoodnight, Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe turned toward the sound of Laddie\u2019s voice.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGoodnight, Laddie. It was nice meeting you. Thanks again for the help you gave me today at the station.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re welcome. Sleep well.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThank you. I will.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe left the room then, making his way to the stairs. He looked forward to \u201csleeping well\u201d as Laddie put it, and getting rid of his headache before it grew any worse.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe heard Adam tell Laddie they\u2019d have their coffee in the parlor, then didn\u2019t hear anything else that transpired between the couple, as he reached the top of the stairs and headed for his room.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 22<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh, Joseph, I apologize. I wasn\u2019t excectin\u2019 yeh to be comin\u2019 to yer room so soon after supper.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s okay.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI was just puttin\u2019 yer clothes away fer yeh.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t have to do that,\u201d Joe told the housekeeper, realizing she must have come up the back staircase from the kitchen.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t mind. Yeh look tired, yeh do. Sit down on the bed there and take a bit of a rest.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI will, but only if you sit down and rest, too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh now, I don\u2019t be needin\u2019 to do that. Go on with yeh though. Sit. Sit, sit, sit.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe chuckled, but did as the woman commanded. He pulled his boots off and set them on the floor beside his bed, then sank to the mattress, leaning his upper body against one of the tall posts.<\/span><\/p>\n

As the woman bustled around the room, Joe commented, \u201cAdam said you live here full time?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cFor a good many years I have. Ever since me husband passed away.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat me husband passed away?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t be. He was a nutter.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA nutter?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot right in the head. Don\u2019 know why I married him to begin with. Guess \u2018cause he was the only one who asked me. I wasn\u2019t the kinda\u2019 girl who caught a young man\u2019s eye.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh come on. I don\u2019t believe that.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBelieve it or not, it\u2019s the truth. But never yeh mind about it. We can\u2019t all be fair of face like yerself and Miss Laddie. God gives each of us our share of blessings, as me dear mam often said. What one gits another doesn\u2019t, and so on. It all works out even in the end.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI imagine it does.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSo after Seamus \u2013 me husband \u2013 passed on, Captain Stoddard invited me to live here. He was bein\u2019 kind, he was. He knew I\u2019d have a hard time makin\u2019 ends meet if I didn\u2019t have me room and board as part of me pay. I have no sons to help provide for me, yeh see. The good Lord didn\u2019t bless Seamus and me with children, which was probably just as well, since nutters run in Seamus\u2019s family.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat was he like?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI already told yeh,\u201d the woman said as she moved between Joe\u2019s trunk, the dresser, and the closet, putting his clothes away. \u201cHe was a nutter.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCaptain Stoddard?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo Seamus. But if it\u2019s Captain Stoddard yer askin\u2019 me about now, he was a lot like yer brother Adam.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHow so?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA smart man, he was. A good man; well thought a\u2019 by those who worked fer him and did business with him. A little too serious much a\u2019 the time, and stingy with his pleases and thank yous, just like yer brother is, yet he cared. He cared deeply in his heart, I believe. Just had a hard time showin\u2019 it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGuess he does sound a little like Adam.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot a little, Joseph. A lot. Adam has much of his grandfather in \u2018im. So much that sometimes I catch meself callin\u2019 him Captain Stoddard by mistake.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

The woman shut a drawer. From the sound of her voice, Joe could tell she\u2019d turned to look at him. \u201cWhew, that job\u2019s done. Think I\u2019ll shut this trunk and take me a bit of a rest right here on top of it \u2018fore I go downstairs and wash the dishes, if yeh don\u2019t mind.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t mind. Please do. And thanks for putting my things away.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYer welcome. Just don\u2019t tell yer brother I unpacked yer luggage, or he\u2019ll be thinkin\u2019 I should unpack his, too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe laughed. \u201cYour secret\u2019s safe with me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI knew it would be. Yeh know, he was beside himself with worry over yeh.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPardon?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYer brother. He was worried somethin\u2019 fierce over yeh when he got yer da\u2019s telegram \u2018bout yer accident.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh. Oh. . .I suppose he was.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd then after yer da\u2019s letter came \u2018bout wantin\u2019 to hire a teacher, yer brother told Miss Laddie straight off that he\u2019d be leavin\u2019 for Nevada to offer yeh whatever help he could. Never hesitated a bit, he didn\u2019t. Just said his responsibilities at the school would have to wait until he got back.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe absorbed this news without comment. He\u2019d assumed his father had asked Adam to come home. Until now, he hadn\u2019t known that Adam had made that decision of his own accord.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHe worked hard too, learnin\u2019 things to teach yeh from Miss Laddie.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sure he did.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201c \u2018Course she was the best teacher he could have, her bein\u2019 blind and all.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Despite his headache and weariness, Joe pushed himself away from the bedpost.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019d you say?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat she\u2019s the best teacher–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I mean the part about Laddie being blind.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI said just that. She\u2019s blind. Yeh didn\u2019t know?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUh. . .no. No, I didn\u2019t.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh dear. There I go runnin\u2019 on at me mouth again. I\u2019m sorry, Joseph. Maybe I wasn\u2019t supposed to tell yeh. Mr. Cartwright didn\u2019t say not to, but if he didn\u2019t want me to, he\u2019ll be awfully cross with me.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t worry, I won\u2019t let him be.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell there, I like yeh even more now than I already did.\u201d Joe heard the rustle of the woman\u2019s skirts as she stood. \u201cI\u2019ll push this empty trunk into the closet, then I\u2019d better get at those dishes. I laid out a clean towel and a washcloth for yeh in the lavatory on the edge of the sink, and I put yer toothbrush and tooth powder there, too. Yer other things \u2013 comb, and hair tonic, and razor, and such, are here on top a\u2019 the dresser.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThank you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYer welcome. Sleep peacefully, Joseph.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI will. You too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGoodnight to yeh.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGoodnight,\u201d Joe replied, hearing the door close as the woman departed.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe sat a moment absorbing all he\u2019d been told by Mrs. O\u2019Connell, then stood, making his way out of his room and down the hall to the water closet. He\u2019d been in a few expensive San Francisco hotels over the years and enjoyed their bathing luxuries, but not even the most lavish San Francisco accommodations compared to the conveniences right here in Adam\u2019s home.<\/span><\/p>\n

Guess there is a thing or two to be said for big city living here in the East.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Joe used the facilities, jumping a little at the \u201cwhooshing\u201d sound the commode made when he pulled the chain to flush it. He hoped he hadn\u2019t broken it, but when Adam didn\u2019t come charging up the stairs, Joe assumed he\u2019d done nothing wrong. He moved to the sink, where he washed his hands and face, then brushed his teeth, all the while relishing in the convenience of how easy it was to cleanup when you didn\u2019t have to pump water into a pitcher, and then pour it into a washbowl.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe returned to his room, faintly hearing Laddie and Adam\u2019s voices coming from the parlor below as he navigated the hall. After he closed his door, Joe removed his pants, shirt, and socks, and laid them across the end of the bed. He was too tired, and his head hurt too much, for him to care about finding which drawer Mrs. O\u2019Connell had put his nightshirts in. He climbed between the sheets wearing just his under drawers, the scent of Adam\u2019s flowerbeds drifting in with the summer breeze.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe gave a grateful sigh as his aching head sank into the pillows. Mrs. O\u2019Connell had given him a lot of information to think about, but Joe was too exhausted, and in too much pain, to concentrate on anything but trying to capture the relief sleep would bring him.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 23<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

The Cartwright brothers breakfasted at the round wicker table on the back porch the next morning. Or on the \u201cveranda\u201d as Adam referred to it, only to have Joe counter with, \u201cYeah, like I said, the back porch.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

In a haughty tone, Adam teased, \u201cWe call it a veranda here in Boston.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell now, that might be so, but as your hero Mr. Shakespeare was fond of saying, a rose by any other name. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam toasted his brother with his thin china coffee cup. \u201cTouch\u00e9, Joseph. I didn\u2019t realize you were familiar with Shakespeare.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOnly familiar with him because Miss Jones made us put on some of his plays in school. She always gave me the biggest speaking part, since Mitch had such a bad case of stage fright he spent most of each performance in the outhouse, and as far as any of the other boys went \u2013 no one could do memory work as slick as me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThanks to the way Pa made us recite our school work to him while we did chores.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe that\u2019s what helped you. As for me, it\u2019s thanks to the way I memorized the rotation of what girls were scheduled to dance on what days at the Silver Dollar.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou couldn\u2019t even get in the Silver Dollar when you were still in school,\u201d Adam scoffed. \u201cSam would have kicked you out. He knew Pa would have his hide if he let you frequent that place.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI could get in if I slipped in the back door, and kinda laid-low behind a corner table. Boy, that Nellie could sure give a man \u2013 as well as a boy \u2013 a mighty fine view when her leg went in the air, couldn\u2019t she?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI wouldn\u2019t know.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe cocked an eyebrow over his plate of three eggs fried sunny-side up. \u201cOh you wouldn\u2019t, would you?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUm. . .no. No, I wouldn\u2019t,\u201d Adam answered, all the while wondering if his brother knew Miss Nellie had been as much a favorite of his, as she\u2019d evidently been of fourteen-year-old Joe\u2019s.<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam got his answer when Joe laughed in that cackling way he had whenever he was delighted about something.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I\u2019m sure you wouldn\u2019t,\u201d Joe said smugly. \u201cJust like I\u2019m sure Hoss would deny that Doris was the one he fancied.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDoris? Why she was as big as a barn.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe shrugged. \u201cThere\u2019s no accounting for taste when it comes to what a man desires in a woman.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cApparently not.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSpeaking of women, Laddie seems very nice.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cShe is.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSounds young.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cShe\u2019s twenty-six.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s reply was sharper than he\u2019d intended it to be, as though he was challenging Joe to make a comment \u2013 any comment at all \u2013 about the age difference between himself and the woman he was courting.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe didn\u2019t make a comment, though. Or at least not one that Adam could take offense at. Joe only nodded his head. \u201cI thought she sounded young.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou two seemed to have hit it off.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLike I said, she\u2019s nice. I\u2019m happy for you, Adam. For both of you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHappy for us for what reason?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat you\u2019re seeing one another.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHow do you know we\u2019re \u201cseeing\u201d one another?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSame reason I know Nellie was your favorite saloon girl. I\u2019m the youngest. I\u2019ve had years of practice at paying close attention to the things you or Pa won\u2019t come right out and tell me.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOr you saw me in the Silver Dollar when you were hiding behind that corner table.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe grinned. \u201cThat too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam studied his brother over their plates of eggs, toast, bacon, and blueberries. This last was a fruit Joe had never eaten before, because it wasn\u2019t native to Nevada or the surrounding area.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Given another time, Adam would have been jealous of how well Joe and Laddie got on from the moment they met, and Joe would have given him cause to be. The competitiveness between them ran long and deep, dating back to all of the years Adam was envious of the attention Joe received from their father, and Joe was envious of Adam\u2019s position as the oldest brother, and all the privileges it brought him. Or at least privileges in Joe\u2019s eyes. But Adam\u2019s years away from the Ponderosa had done them both good. Adam could see that now. Joe hadn\u2019t needed a big brother in order to grow into the man he was to become \u2013 a man of strength and character, whose actions reflected the moral teachings he\u2019d been raised with. The kind of man Pa was proud of, just like Pa was proud of Hoss, and proud of Adam, too.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Now, for reasons Adam couldn\u2019t fully pinpoint, he knew Joe wouldn\u2019t make a play for his girl. There was a time when the insecurities Adam never admitted to out loud, would have had him as on guard as an old \u201cmama bear with one cub,\u201d as Hoss would say, where Laddie and Joe were concerned. But no more. Although a degree of competitiveness would likely always exist between himself and Joe, Adam had no worries that his brother would initiate anything with Laddie that was meant to take her away from him.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Of course, it doesn\u2019t hurt any that they can\u2019t see each other, Adam chuckled to himself, in reference to the beautiful woman he was courting and his handsome brother. Even with that sprinkling of gray hair, you still turn the ladies\u2019 heads, Joseph, and probably will until the day you die.<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe interrupted Adam\u2019s thoughts as he took another spoonful of blueberries from the small bowl to the left of his breakfast plate. \u201cThese are good.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI thought you\u2019d like them.\u201d Adam took note of how well rested Joe looked this morning, and how chipper he sounded. The early trip to bed had probably been the best thing for him after their long day. \u201cThey make an excellent pie, too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNow that Hoss would like.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

This wasn\u2019t the first time since leaving Virginia City that Adam realized how often Joe mentioned Hoss. He assumed this was a reflection of a touch of homesickness. Or maybe it was just a reflection of all the years\u2019 worth of adventures Joe had shared with Hoss, and that Joe would like to be sharing this adventure in Boston with his middle brother, as well.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMrs. O\u2019Connell canned some of them. I\u2019ll ask her to make a blueberry pie when Hoss and Pa come to visit.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHoss\u2019ll enjoy that almost as much as he\u2019s gonna enjoy that bathtub of yours.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI imagine you\u2019re right.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe finished his blueberries, pushing the dish aside. He \u201clooked\u201d at his brother.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, why didn\u2019t you tell me Laddie was blind?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPardon?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou heard me. Why didn\u2019t you tell me Laddie was blind?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s eyes shot to the screen door, where the little woman who\u2019d just started to step out of it while carrying the coffee pot, disappeared back into the house.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMrs. O\u2019Connell told you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt doesn\u2019t matter who told me. Why didn\u2019t you tell me?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause Laddie and I wanted to wait a while before revealing it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBecause we wanted you to have a good understanding of how much she\u2019s capable of doing. We wanted you to be. . .surprised, I suppose you\u2019d say, when you found out that she can\u2019t see. We thought it would help you gain confidence regarding your future.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAny thoughts I had about my future pretty much got blown up in that shack of Charlie\u2019s.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI realize that. But as time goes on, you\u2019ll start thinking about your future again with renewed hope. I wanted you to see that Laddie\u2019s made a rewarding and full life for herself.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIs she happy?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam smiled. \u201cYou\u2019d have to ask her that question, but I think so.\u201d The man sobered. \u201cShe has the same things you do, Joe.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s that?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA family who cares about her, and gives her whatever support she needs. A job where she\u2019s valued and depended upon. A good sense of humor, and the ability to laugh at herself.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I guess two outta three isn\u2019t so bad.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTwo out of three?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t have a job yet.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou will.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI appreciate your confidence in me, big brother, but until the school board actually hires me, I don\u2019t have a job.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLike I said, you will.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTime will tell I expect,\u201d Joe shrugged, before taking the subject back to Laddie. \u201cWas Laddie born blind?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, but she doesn\u2019t have many memories of when she could see. She was just three when she lost her sight.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHow\u2019d it happen?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cShe was ill with the measles, and ran a high fever.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe nodded. High fevers were a common way children lost their sight, or their hearing, or often times both.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSometimes I wonder if it would have been easier that way.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIf what would have been easier?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLosing my sight. If it would have been easier to lose it before I knew what it was like to see. Or at least before I had memories of what it was like.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know. What do you think?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSometimes yes, sometimes no. Depends on what mood I\u2019m in.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat sounds like Joe Cartwright. Ruled by his moods.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cEven six years can\u2019t change some things, Adam.\u201d Joe brightened. \u201cNow on the other hand, if I\u2019d never been able to see, I wouldn\u2019t know what Pa looks like, or what Hoss looks like, or how serious you used to look when you were frowning over something I\u2019d done that had you riled.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhich was so often it\u2019s amazing my mouth isn\u2019t permanently set in a frown.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe laughed, while pushing his empty plate aside and standing. He must have sensed that Mrs. O\u2019Connell was eavesdropping somewhere just inside the door, because he called, \u201cThank you for breakfast, Mrs. O\u2019Connell! It was wonderful!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYer surely welcome, Joseph,\u201d came the pleased response.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

As Adam held out his arm to Joe and led him down the six steps from the back porch to the yard, he admonished, \u201cQuit flirting with her.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWho? Mrs. O\u2019Connell?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes. Mrs. O\u2019Connell.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAw, come on, Adam, I can\u2019t flirt with Hop Sing. Or at least not without the neighbors talking, so let a guy have a little fun, will ya\u2019?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam just shook his head while whistling for Shakespeare. The dog got up from where he\u2019d been laying beside Adam\u2019s chair, trotted down the stairs, and joined Adam and Joe as they started to walk around the grounds.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

As soft fur brushed against his fingertips, Joe said, \u201cHe seems to be a real calm dog.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHe is,\u201d Adam agreed. \u201cHe\u2019s got a pleasant temperament. He carries himself with an almost regal bearing, as odd as that sounds. He\u2019s intelligent, too. We\u2019ll take him for a walk in a little while if you\u2019d like.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSure. But don\u2019t you need to go to the institute?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot today. Today I\u2019ve set aside to get you familiar with the yard and the neighborhood.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t have to, if you\u2019ve got more important things to do. I know you\u2019ve been away from work longer than you probably should have.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, when I left, I told the school board I\u2019d be gone as long as my brother needed me. I made no promises as to when I\u2019d return, so I think I can be gone one more day without the risk of losing my job.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIf you say so.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI do. Besides, the institute isn\u2019t far from here. I thought we\u2019d walk there with Shakespeare. A lot of the kids go home during summer break, but a number of them remain at the school year round, too. They love Shakespeare. A visit from him will brighten their day, while giving you a chance to meet some of them, as well as some of the teachers.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell\u2026okay. If you think it\u2019ll be all right.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOf course it\u2019ll be all right. Why wouldn\u2019t it be?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know,\u201d Joe shrugged, as he walked a flower-lined stone path with Adam. \u201cIt\u2019s not like I work there yet, and I don\u2019t have a child who attends there, and–\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd you\u2019re my brother, so yes, it\u2019s all right.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam would have wondered why Joe had suddenly gotten so insecure, if it hadn\u2019t been for the scolding he\u2019d received from Laddie after Joe had gone to bed the previous evening. As was befitting for a woman of her class and upbringing, the scolding was gentle, but it got Laddie\u2019s point across.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, I\u2019d like to discuss something with you, please.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam had smiled as he set his coffee cup on the little table to the side of the settee.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhatever it is, you sound far too serious after the pleasant meal we\u2019ve just finished, and you\u2019re frowning, too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAs well I should be.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd why, pray tell, my dear lady, should you be frowning?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, you were wrong to leave Joe alone by that bench today.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

All the lightness in Adam\u2019s tone left then.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh, Laddie, come on. He knew that bench was his anchor, and that\u2019s where I\u2019d be expecting to find him. If you\u2019re going to frown at someone, it should be at Joe, not at me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re his teacher, Adam, and his brother. His teacher and his brother both. You, more than anyone, should know better than to leave him alone during the first ten minutes he\u2019s in a strange city, bench or no bench.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut you don\u2019t know Joe. He\u2019s got an independent streak a mile long. Five miles long, my father claims. Joe won\u2019t stand for being babied.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not saying you should baby him. I\u2019m saying you have to be mindful that he\u2019s in a city foreign to him, and that it\u2019s going to be a while before this feels like home.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI realize that, but you\u2019re blaming me for something that wasn\u2019t my fault. He was the one who left the bench! He was the one who shouldn\u2019t have chased those kids who took his wallet.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAre you certain that\u2019s how it happened?\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cPardon?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAre you absolutely certain that\u2019s how it happened?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, of course you\u2019re not, because you didn\u2019t let Joe explain.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat was he going to explain? That his temper got the best of him, and he ran after the boys like he would have if he still had his sight? I already know what happened, Laddie. I didn\u2019t need an explanation.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI think you do. Actually, I know you do. And when you get that explanation, you\u2019ll realize you owe your brother an apology.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAn apology!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie gave a firm nod. \u201cAn apology.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWoman. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Laddie had leaned into Adam\u2019s shoulder then, \u201clooked\u201d up at him, and smiled.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWoman what?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam sighed, then gave in and kissed that luscious mouth. \u201cYou\u2019ll be the death of me yet.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut it will be a sweet death, won\u2019t it?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

As Adam began kissing her more arduously, he\u2019d murmured, \u201cOh yes. Oh yes, it will be.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Now, as Adam walked with Joe beside him, Joe\u2019s right hand resting lightly on his arm, Adam cleared his throat like he did whenever he had to \u201ceat crow\u201d \u2013 which fortunately, Adam didn\u2019t deem necessary very often.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUh. . .Joe. . .\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhen we stopped at the police station on the way home yesterday, I didn\u2019t hear what you told the officer who took the report about your wallet.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe shot Adam a funny look. \u201cI know. You didn\u2019t come in the room with me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUm, no. No, I didn\u2019t, because I realize you\u2019re perfectly capable of handling your own affairs. I didn\u2019t want you to think I felt otherwise.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGood. That\u2019s good. Uh. . .listen, if you don\u2019t mind, why don\u2019t you tell me what happened.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe wasn\u2019t any easier to fool now, than he had been when he was a kid. He scowled, though Adam thought he could detect a hint of amusement behind those furrowed brows and that cold stare \u2013 the facial expression reminding Adam so much of their father, he almost thought it was Ben Cartwright beside him. Joe\u2019s response made Adam think of their father, too.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhy didn\u2019t you ask me yesterday, instead of accusing me of chasing those kids and leaving that bench on purpose?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t accuse you of leaving the bench on purpose.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSounded that way to me. As though you thought I\u2019d inconvenienced you on purpose.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019ve been inconveniencing me on purpose since the day you were born.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

When Joe didn\u2019t laugh, Adam nudged him. \u201cI was only kidding.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Joe smiled then. \u201cI know. Just thought I\u2019d make you sweat a little.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAlready am sweating. This August heat gets to me after a while.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen I thought I\u2019d make you sweat a little more.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhich you\u2019ve accomplished. So come on, how about it? Tell me what happened.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNot much to tell really. I felt a hand on my back, leading me away from the bench. I thought it was you, so I went along. I asked if you\u2019d gotten us a carriage, and when you didn\u2019t answer, I asked again. I still didn\u2019t get an answer, and all of a sudden another hand joined the first one, and they started running. I was in-between them, so didn\u2019t have much choice but to run, too. At the time, I still thought one of the hands I could feel belonged to you. I figured something was going on that you needed to get me away from, like a fire, or a runaway train. But then one of the kids took my wallet and I heard him laugh, and knew I\u2019d been had. By the time they took off, I had no idea where I was. I tried to get help, but no one would stop until Laddie and Elliot came along.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

A silence ensued that was interrupted only by the birds chirping in the trees overhead, and squawking as they played in a birdbath a few yards up the path.<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam finally broke the silence. \u201cJoe. . .Joe, I\u2019m sorry. I should have let you explain yesterday, instead of standing there yelling at you. It\u2019s just that I. . .well, I was pretty worried, you know?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI know.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Adam gave a small, self-deprecating laugh. \u201cI kept wondering how I was going to explain to Pa that I\u2019d lost you within ten minutes of arriving in Boston.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

In his best imitation of Hop Sing, Joe scolded, \u201cMista Cartlight be berry berry unhappy if you lose number 3 son.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

With a laugh, Adam agreed, \u201cYes, Mr. Cartwright would be.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSo did Laddie make you apologize to me?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Now it was Adam\u2019s turn to scowl. \u201cDid you hear us talking?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNope. Was sleeping like a baby not long after I went upstairs. It just seems like the kind of thing she\u2019d do.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLet\u2019s put it this way. She suggested that I give it serious consideration.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThen in my opinion, she\u2019s the right woman for you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s that supposed to mean?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat any woman who makes you apologize to me will be the perfect sister-in-law.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019ve already got my housekeeper spoiling you. You don\u2019t need a sister-in-law doing the same.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, that\u2019s your problem.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s my problem?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou have yet come to the realization that a man can never be spoiled by too many women.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAt least not in Joe Cartwright\u2019s book.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cEspecially not in Joe Cartwright\u2019s book.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, it\u2019s jumping the gun for us to be discussing sisters-in-law, so how about if I finish showing you the grounds, then I\u2019ll go in and get Shakespeare\u2019s leash and we\u2019ll head over to the institute.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSounds fine to me, as long as you don\u2019t leave me hanging onto a bench somewhere.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh, believe me, Joseph, it\u2019ll be a good long while before I leave you hanging onto a bench again.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe it\u2019s you who owes me candy this time, so I don\u2019t tell Pa.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWha. . .oh,\u201d Adam nodded, realizing Joe remembered the incident at the traveling show, too. \u201cYes, I suppose I do owe you some candy. We\u2019ll stop at the sweet shop on the way to the institute. Nothing will have you beloved by the students quicker than arriving with enough candy for everyone.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAs long as you\u2019re paying for it, big brother, I won\u2019t argue.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t think you would, little brother,\u201d Adam said, as he put his arm around Joe\u2019s shoulders. \u201cI didn\u2019t think you would.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Thirty minutes later, with Joe holding Shakespeare\u2019s leash, the Cartwrights were headed out of Adam\u2019s front gate, with Casey\u2019s Sweet Shop slated as the first stop on their agenda, followed by the Boston Institute for the Blind.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/div>\n
Disclaimer:<\/span>\u00a0All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.<\/span><\/div>\n
<\/div>\n

Next Story in the Conquering the Stillness Within Series:<\/strong><\/p>\n

Part 2<\/a><\/p>\n

Part 3<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Summary: \u00a0“Conquering the Stillness Within” is an alternate universe story to the 12th season aired episode “The Stillness Within.” Or maybe better put a, What if it would have happened like this. . . story. Although the character of Jamie Hunter appeared in “The Stillness Within,” he doesn’t appear in “Conquering.” Candy, who did not appear in “The Stillness Within,” is included in this fan fiction story.<\/p>\n

Rated:\u00a0K+ (49,455 words)<\/p>\n

Conquering the Stillness Within Series, links to all the stories within the series included.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":73,"featured_media":2540,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"template-full-width-post.php","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_members_access_role":[],"_members_access_error":""},"categories":[1091,7,23,27],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2537","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-adam-joe","category-a-u","category-drama","category-whi","wpcat-1091-id","wpcat-7-id","wpcat-23-id","wpcat-27-id"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/Stillness-Within-copy.jpg?fit=629%2C470&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2537","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/73"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2537"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2537\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2540"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2537"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2537"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2537"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}