{"id":46283,"date":"2007-01-03T16:44:34","date_gmt":"2007-01-03T21:44:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=46283"},"modified":"2025-02-27T12:10:14","modified_gmt":"2025-02-27T17:10:14","slug":"like-joseph-by-cowgirl-jones","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=46283","title":{"rendered":"Like Joseph (by Cowgirl Jones)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Summary:<\/strong> The Cartwrights band together to help each other through a dark time of twists and turns.<\/p>\n

Rating:<\/strong> PG for adult issues and emotionally intense scenes \/\u00a0Words:\u00a0 <\/strong>\u00a058,425<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Like Joseph Series<\/strong><\/p>\n

Like Joseph<\/a>
\nWhatever My Lot<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

Acknowledgements:<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong>Special thanks to Kaatje and Holliday and everyone else who were faithful readers when this story was a WIP. I appreciate your comments and suggestions throughout the writing process. Also many thanks to my beta readers, Kemarlow and Lynnlaur for putting in the time to read and discuss corrections with<\/em> me<\/em>.<\/strong><\/p>\n

This was originally a WIP in the Bonanza World forum and was posted in its completion to the BW Library in January of 2007. Thank you to BluewindFarm and Cheaux and Bonanza Brand for helping preserve the older fanfic stories like this one.<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Like Joseph<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

Chapter1 \u2013 A Family Moment<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cHey little man, what\u2019cha doin\u2019,\u201d Hoss asked as he walked up behind the small boy.<\/p>\n

\u201cShh! They\u2019ll hear you!\u201d The youngster said holding one finger to his mouth.<\/p>\n

\u201cWho?\u201d Hoss looked around at the vacant yard.<\/p>\n

\u201cThem bad guys,\u201d the six-year-old pointed with his thumb in the direction of the barn door, which stood slightly ajar.<\/p>\n

Hoss frowned quizzically as he peeked into the barn. He saw Adam moving a pitchfork back and forth. He could hear Joe\u2019s voice coming from within, though he couldn\u2019t see him. The two men were talking quietly as they went about their barn chores.<\/p>\n

Hoss looked down at the boy who was also peering into the barn. From the pocket of the child\u2019s britches poked a stick that roughly resembled the shape of a pistol.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo, Benny \u2013 I mean, Sheriff \u2013 what\u2019d these \u2018bad guys\u2019 do anyway?\u201d Hoss asked, trying to keep his face serious.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy, they\u2019re robbing that bank in there!\u201d he answered as though it should be obvious to anyone.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, right\u2026\u201d Hoss rubbed his chin thoughtfully, \u201cWell, I \u2018spect yer gonna\u2019 need a pretty good deputy.\u201d<\/p>\n

The child turned around and looked up disappointedly, \u201cAw, I tried to make ol\u2019 Chief over there my deputy, but he just wants to lay \u2018round on the porch.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss looked over to see the Bassett Hound lying on its side, one long ear flopped lazily over both eyes as a shield from the midday sun. He could hear Chief\u2019s snoring across the yard. He had to admit, the dog was a cute one, but he didn\u2019t make an especially practical ranch dog.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, I reckon dogs don\u2019t make good deputies. Say, how \u2018bout I be yer deputy?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cReally?\u201d Benny said excitedly, then held himself in check and stated soberly, \u201cWell, I s\u2019pose you\u2019ll do fine.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo, you got a plan, sheriff?\u201d Hoss asked as he bent down to the boy\u2019s level.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I figger\u2019 I\u2019ll go in and say, \u2018Stick\u2019em up!\u2019\u201d He held his finger out as though it were a gun.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, that\u2019s pretty good I guess, but ain\u2019t that what bad guys say? How \u2018bout, \u2018All right yer under arrest!\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOoh, that\u2019s good Hoss \u2013 I mean Deputy. Ready?\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss reached for the broom leaning against the outside of the barn and held it like a rifle.<\/p>\n

\u201cReady,\u201d he answered seriously.<\/p>\n

Benny swung the barn door open, yelling out, \u201cAlright you bank robbers, yer under arrest!\u201d He glanced up at Hoss seeking approval for the delivery of the line. Hoss answered with a nod and a wink.<\/p>\n

Adam and Joe calmly looked up from their work. A grin spread across Adam\u2019s face as he realized what was happening and nudged Little Joe with his elbow.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, yeah \u2013 um \u2013 you caught us red-handed,\u201d Joe said. Both brothers raised their hands in the air.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow, don\u2019t you two even think of makin\u2019 any sudden moves, ya hear?\u201d Hoss said. He was standing behind Benny, grinning widely. He gave a wink to Adam and Joe.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, we wouldn\u2019t think of it-\u201c Adam began, but before he quite got the words out, Joe had lunged forward, rolled on across the barn floor to a nearby empty stall, his fingers pointed at Benny and making \u201cbang\u201d-ing sounds.<\/p>\n

Benny jumped in surprise at this then covered his mouth as he laughed. He then reached for the \u201cpistol\u201d in his pocket. Unfortunately, it caught on the fabric of his pants and made for a charmingly clumsy few moments as the child scrambled to get the stick out of his improvised holster. When at last it came free, Benny pointed at Joe.<\/p>\n

\u201cBang! Bang!\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s hands covered his heart. \u201cAh, ya got me!\u201d He rolled back out to the middle of the barn to die.<\/p>\n

\u201cBang! Bang!\u201d Benny now pointed at Adam.<\/p>\n

Adam, however, refused to die as quickly. He groaned dramatically as he clutched his abdomen. He tumbled left then stammered right, all the while making grunting noises. This carried on for several moments before he finally fell to the ground next to Joe. He lay motionless for a moment then twitched a few times before expiring completely.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

It was almost time for lunch as Ben stepped out of the front door to call his youngest son in to wash up. He stopped short, frowning, when he saw the front yard was empty. Hadn\u2019t he told the boy to stay in the yard? Just then, he heard \u201cBang! Bang!\u201d from the barn. He scowled. How many times had they gone over this? Staying \u201cin the yard\u201d did not include going to the barn to pester his brothers. He walked determinedly to the barn door. He rolled his eyes when he noticed that it had been carelessly left open. He reached the door just in time to catch the last fleeting groans of Adam\u2019s death scene. He paused in the doorway, his irritation fading at the story unfolding before him. He\u2019d seen this little bit played out before and held back a smile as he thought of how much Benny loved to play \u201cSheriff.\u201d Leaning against the door slightly, he watched his small son.<\/p>\n

Benny leaned over to inspect his recently deceased perpetrators and scratched his head in confusion. Usually, when he got close enough to inspect them, they would jump up and the gun fight would begin again. He took his stick-pistol and poked Adam with it on the shoulder. Adam remained motionless. Benny turned his attention to Joe, who he tapped on the leg with the stick. Nothing.<\/p>\n

He spun around to Hoss and cocked his head, a crinkle-nosed grin on his face. Benny knew they were up to something but couldn\u2019t quite put his finger on what was about to happen. Smiling, Hoss shrugged his shoulders at him.<\/p>\n

Suddenly, Benny was being lifted from the ground. He squealed as the barn swirled around him.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve got you now Sheriff!\u201d Joe was saying. Benny could hardly hear him over his own giggling.<\/p>\n

\u201cSay, Adam, let\u2019s teach our dear Sheriff here a lesson. Let\u2019s throw him over this cliff<\/em>,\u201d Joe pointed to a large mound of fresh hay to his right.<\/p>\n

With a smile, Adam jumped up and grabbed the child\u2019s ankles, while Joe latched on to his wrists. They began to swing him back and forth.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, no! Don\u2019t!\u201d Benny said in gasps between bouts of laughter.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, you\u2019re in for it in now!\u201d Adam said.<\/p>\n

\u201cOne\u2026.two\u2026.\u201dThe men counted as they swung.<\/p>\n

\u201cThreee!\u201d Ben, who still stood in the doorway, felt his heart stop as their hands let loose of the boy. Benny laughed as he landed softly on the pile of hay, and Ben allowed himself to relax again.<\/p>\n

Benny let himself tumble haphazardly to the bottom of the pile. He got up and ran happily to Hoss. He raised his arms upward to his large brother. Hoss knew exactly what that meant. He picked the boy up and tossed him high into the air with hefty grunts. Catching him on the way down, he\u2019d propel him right back up into the air once again.<\/p>\n

Just as Hoss was setting Benny back on the ground, Ben decided to finally make his entrance. He took a moment to replace his grin with his most serious father-face.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat in blazes is going on in here?\u201d he shouted, crouching down toward the boy.<\/p>\n

The four turned their heads to look at their father, all still wearing smiles except for Benny. Benny suddenly remembered his father\u2019s admonition to stay in<\/em> the yard. Oh dear, he thought, he\u2019d done it now. He looked at his father with wide, repentant eyes and stood motionless, awaiting whatever might come next.<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s face relaxed into a grin again as he walked into the center of the barn.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019ve gotta be careful of those bank robbers, Sheriff!\u201d Ben said then eased himself down onto one of the few bales of hay that was still tightly packed and bound with wire. He folded his arms and sat back to take in the scene before him.<\/p>\n

Benny smiled and relaxed, dropping to his knees next to Hoss, who had already made himself comfortable on the loose hay. Benny flopped himself over Hoss\u2019s legs, laying crossways on his belly. Contentedly, he laid his head down on Hoss\u2019s lap.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m gonna be a she\u2019errf when I grow up,\u201d he said more to himself than anyone in particular, \u201cAn\u2019 I\u2019m gonna get all the bad guys.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss smiled and rubbed a few small circles on the boy\u2019s back with his large hand before pulling his hat down over his eyes.<\/p>\n

For all the noise and excitement that filled the barn moments before, all was quiet and peaceful now. It wasn\u2019t a sad kind of quiet or even an uncomfortable quiet. It was a contented silence as each person became absorbed in his own thoughts.<\/p>\n

Ben looked around the room, taking in the sight, memorizing it. It was one of those unremarkable moments that, for whatever reason, the heart chose to be a special memory.<\/p>\n

Ben looked to his right. Adam and Joe were sitting, backs propped up against a wall of hay bails. They had a quiet conversation going between them. Ben was oblivious to the topic of discussion. From their demeanor, it was just casual light-hearted talk between brothers. Adam had one leg stretched out and the other was bent supporting the weight of his elbow on it. He unconsciously twirled a long strand of hay in his fingers. His face still held the trace of a smile. It was good, although not common, to see Adam with his guard down. He was happy, of that Ben was sure, but he was not given to as much merriment as his brothers. In fact, almost the only time he allowed himself to be sucked into these raucous games, was when Benny was involved. It reminded Ben of years earlier when Little Joe had been Benny\u2019s age.<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s mind briefly traveled to a time when the pain of Marie\u2019s death was still fresh in their hearts. He\u2019d taken the boys on a picnic in the meadow and there watched Adam entertain his younger brothers. They played \u201cBlind Man\u2019s Bluff,\u201d and other games that he knew Adam felt too old to be playing. At seventeen, he\u2019d fancied himself to be a man, but had a tender heart toward his grieving brothers and was willing to do almost anything to help them smile again. It didn\u2019t seem that terribly long ago, but here was Adam all of thirty-two years old.<\/p>\n

Thirty-two. How old does that make<\/em> me<\/em>?>\/i> He mused. Adam had really turned out exactly as Ben had always imagined. Always the responsible one; doing what must be done. Ben wondered just how he would have made out all years without Adam at his side. He\u2019d gone through a lot in his life, but looking at his contented expression, he seemed no worse for the wear.<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s eyes traveled to Little Joe. Little<\/em> Joe? The name was more a tradition now than anything. He wasn\u2019t the youngest in the family anymore. Joe had been nearly grown when Benny came to them, and now at twenty years of age, he was certainly not little<\/em> anymore. He was a man now. When had that happened?<\/p>\n

Much to Joe\u2019s satisfaction, his older brothers were treating him less and less like a little kid. Ben knew that much of that was because of the presence of Benny which had made Joe grow up. He was now a big brother, a role he\u2019d never played until five and a half years ago. He watched his third son as he mindlessly toyed with the brim of his hat. He and Adam were still conversing quietly. Joe\u2019s smile would broaden every now and then at something Adam would say.<\/p>\n

Ben smiled. Joe was full of life. Quick to become angry, quick to act, but just as quick to love and show affection. Over the last year or so Ben had noticed his son\u2019s tendency to be quickly angered had been tempered somehow. By what? Age? Wisdom? He wasn\u2019t sure, but here before him was a man, with hardly a glimmer of the boy he\u2019d once held in his arms. Little Joe had a natural handsomeness that Ben was proud of. He\u2019d never have admitted that out loud, for fear of his pride being taken as vanity. Joe was beautiful, with the look of his mother.<\/p>\n

Ben shifted his gaze directly across from Adam and Joe. His smile deepened as he watched Hoss and Benny. Hoss was already snoring peacefully. Benny\u2019s eyelids looked heavier with each blink. Ben knew the boy would be lost in dream land soon and chided himself for not making the child stay awake. He knew that if Benny fell asleep now, he\u2019d never take his nap after lunch. Ben dismissed his concerns of naptime. He knew he\u2019d regret it later, but he didn\u2019t care. He wanted to sit in this moment forever.<\/p>\n

Hoss reached up under his hat to scratch his nose, then let his hand drop to his side again before resuming his snoring. Ben chuckled softly, Hoss truly had a knack for sleeping anywhere, anytime. Hoss. So much love and affection bound into such a silly name. If ever there were one word that could capture the meaning of loyalty and gentleness of mind, heart and hand, it would be \u201cHoss.\u201d Hoss always had a special way of looking at life. Some mistakenly assumed it to be naivety, but Ben knew better. He knew how much Hoss was acquainted with the darker side of life. No, he wasn\u2019t na\u00efve in any sense of the word. His view on life was more of a choice. The choice to find the best in everyone and every situation.<\/p>\n

Ben let his attention fall to Benny. He was lying across Hoss\u2019s lap, in an odd position that Ben thought must be uncomfortable. Ben watched the rise and fall of his back which now came in unison with this almost inaudible snoring. Six. Could it be that old Ben Cartwright was the father of a six-year-old? What\u2019s more, Benny had only just turned six a few days ago. Why, most men his age were grandfathers of children that age! But Ben wouldn\u2019t have traded with those men for the world. Although, at one time, he was not so confident that things would have turned out so well.<\/p>\n

Ben allowed his thoughts to take him back to that night five and a half years ago.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

\u201cThe dad\u2019burned board looks different.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat are you talking about, Hoss?\u201d Joe asked, the pitch of his voice betraying the innocent demeanor he was trying to dispay. \u201cYou moved, I moved, and now it\u2019s your turn again.\u201d\u201cI\u2019m tellin\u2019 ya I left to go get a doughnut and now I come back and the dad\u2019burned board looks different,\u201d Hoss attempted to explain.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, if you\u2019d rather not finish the game, you can just admit defeat right now.\u201d Fourteen-year-old Joe placed his hands smugly behind his head and propped his feet up on the table.\u00a0\u201cJoseph,\u201d Ben said, not even looking away from the newspaper he was reading.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cOh, sorry Pa,\u201d Joe placed his feet back on the floor and turned his attention back to his older brother.<\/em><\/p>\n

Hoss stood there a moment, thinking over his options.Adam looked up from looked up from his journal, deciding that he\u2019d rather watch how this played out. He crossed his arms and grinned. Little Joe always cheated, and Hoss was just now catching on!<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m tellin\u2019 you Little Joe,\u201d Hoss wagged a finger in Joe\u2019s face, \u201cI\u2019m gonna tan you if I ever figger out how it is you cheat like ya do!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, what\u2019d I do brother? I\u2019m just\u2026\u201d Joe was cut off by a knock at the door.The brothers stared at one other, each waiting for one of the others to make the move to answer the door. All was silent except for the ticking of the clock. Ben looked agitatedly at each of his sons.\u201cOh, for heaven\u2019s sake, I\u2019ll answer it!\u201d Ben said at length.<\/em><\/p>\n

Ben stood up and dropped his newspaper in the chair behind him. He walked to the door and lifted the latch. As the door opened, a chilly breeze swept in.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cWell hello Tom, good to see you, come on in,\u201d Ben shut the door to the whistling wind.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cOh wait, Annie\u2019s coming,\u201d Tom said, motioning to the closed door.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cOh\u2026\u201d Ben said, a little puzzled and reopened the door. Annie walked up and shivered against the cold. As she came into the light, he noticed she was holding a tightly wrapped bundle.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cSorry,\u201d She said as she smiled at Ben, \u201cI forgot something in the buggy and had to go back for it.\u201d She indicated the white cotton sack she held that looked as though it held a few clothing items in it.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cOh here, let me take that for you,\u201d Tom said taking the sack from her.<\/em><\/p>\n

Across the room, the brothers clamored to their feet upon the entrance of Annie. Adam cocked his head in thought. He hadn\u2019t remembered Tom saying anything about Annie having a baby. They\u2019d been married for about a year, so it wouldn\u2019t have come as a shock to anyone. But still it was odd that he hadn\u2019t heard of the blessed event.\u201cWell, it\u2019s not that good friends aren\u2019t always welcome,\u201d Ben began, \u201cbut what on earth brings you out here this time of night?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Tom scratched his head slowly said, \u201cWell, Ben, you um\u2026. you got a delivery today.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cTom, you provide excellent service at the post office, but I\u2019ve never known you to make house calls! You certainly didn\u2019t need to come all the way out here.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I kinda did for this delivery\u2026\u201d He laughed uncomfortably, \u201cTruth is, I didn\u2019t rightly know what to do about it\u2026\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Ben frowned quizzically. Tom answered the look by handing him a letter.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe you\u2019d better start by reading this.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Adam couldn\u2019t contain his curiosity any longer and moved closer to the entry area where his father and the guests were standing. In his hand he held his journal, index finger marking his place. Hoss and Little Joe followed closely behind him.\u201cIt\u2019s from Genevieve.\u201d Ben said in an astonished whisper.<\/em><\/p>\n

Adam frowned. It had been, what, over a year now since Genevieve, his father\u2019s very young wife had left them? She had simply left a note explaining that she hadn\u2019t realized what kind of commitment she\u2019d gotten herself into; that it was too much for her and she was going back to New Orleans. Adam brought his mind out of the past; his father was reading the letter.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026I\u2019m sorry things had to turn out like this Ben, but I am at a loss for what to do. I have enclosed the birth certificate. I didn\u2019t name him. I thought you should be the one to do that. I\u2019m sorry. Please don\u2019t think I\u2019m a bad person. Good luck with your new son. Genevieve.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

A loud \u201cthump\u201d startled everyone in the room. Adam\u2019s book slipped from his hand to the floor. Jerking back to reality, he quietly apologized and picked up the book.Ben slowly lifted his head to look at the bundle Annie was holding. The world was spinning. Certificate? Name? Son? The words were repeating themselves in his head. He heard Hoss\u2019s voice call out \u201cPa?\u201d just before everything went black.He\u2019d fainted.<\/em><\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Ben smiled at the memory of it all. Their world at the Ponderosa had changed forever that night. The weeks that had followed were filled with doctor visits, house calls to find a nursemaid and changing diaper upon endless diaper. But they had made it through.<\/p>\n

He continued to look at the small boy, still sleeping soundly. Benny was a good boy. He had black curly hair with bright blue eyes and a little nose that turned up. He was quite small for his age, but what he lacked in size he made up for deep affection for those he loved.<\/p>\n

Benny was the kind of kid that was almost always in a pleasant mood. However, when the circumstance was right, the child could work himself up into a fit like no other. Ben thought for a moment about these episodes; it wasn\u2019t like a temper tantrum. He didn\u2019t do it when he simply didn\u2019t get his way. It reminded Ben of how a small critter would act when taken from the wild, with all of its instincts in motion to get back to what was familiar and safe. It was when his little world felt threatened that Benny would let loose. Ben recalled the first time he\u2019d witnessed this little characteristic in his small son.<\/p>\n

Benny was about a year and a half old. Adam had been away for a month seeing to a legal matter in San Francisco. It was the longest Benny had ever gone without seeing one of his brothers. When Adam returned, he was greeted with sloppy wet kisses from a child who\u2019d felt like his brother would never come home. The child had spent the rest of the day following Adam\u2019s every step, just trying to be with him.<\/p>\n

All was fine until the next morning when Adam headed out to go about his normal daily chores. Benny had cried and latched onto him before he even made it to the door. The more Adam tried to reassure him that he would be back in a few hours, the harder he cried. At length, Ben tried to pry the boy away from Adam\u2019s neck. That was when it happened. Benny began to panic and scream wildly. He clung tightly to Adam with a strength unnatural for one so small. It was not a cry that came from the child so much as it had been a blood-curdling scream. He carried on until suddenly, his face turned pale and he started coughing.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s gonna be sick,\u201d Ben had warned.<\/p>\n

Adam freed himself from the child just in time to sit him down outside the front door, where Benny promptly lost his breakfast then passed out.<\/p>\n

These fits only happened on rare occasions, but when they did the only one who could calm Benny was Hoss. It was possible that Hoss just had a special way with his youngest brother. The more likely reason, to Ben\u2019s thinking, was Hoss\u2019 size. The pressure from those huge hands against Benny\u2019s body seemed to help the boy know that he was safe and that everything would be okay.<\/p>\n

Ben was pulled from his thoughts by the sound of a buggy coming into the yard. Well<\/em>, he thought, back to life,<\/em> and he stood up, brushing the hay from his trousers.<\/p>\n

Adam and Little Joe were still sitting on the barn floor talking quietly. When their father stood, the sound of the vehicle in the yard caught their attention and they rose as well. The three walked to the barn door. Joe nudged Hoss with the toe of his boot to wake him. Hoss lifted the hat from his eyes and squinted. \u201cHmm? Oh\u2026,\u201d was all he said.<\/p>\n

Hoss gathered his sleeping brother as he stood up, yawning. He pressed one hand against the boy\u2019s back to secure him as he bent over to retrieve the tiny hat that had fallen to the barn floor during their game. Holding Benny with one hand and the hat with the other, he walked out of the barn to meet their guest.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy name\u2019s Whitaker. I\u2019m a lawyer from New Orleans,\u201d a short, mousey-looking man was saying. His dark mustache was perfectly manicured and twitched nervously.<\/p>\n

\u201cPleased to meet you,\u201d Ben said, offering his hand to the man.<\/p>\n

Mr. Whitaker ignored the gesture, hurrying on.<\/p>\n

\u201cI need to speak with you regarding-\u201c<\/p>\n

The gentleman was interrupted by Hop Sing, who came running out of the house ranting in Chinese. The cook ran straight to Hoss, wagging his finger in the big man\u2019s direction.<\/p>\n

\u201cLunch time! Food get cold!\u201d Hop Sing then noticed the sleeping child and became furious.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou let little boy sleep now<\/em>? Little boy no eat lunch. Little boy no take nap. No work get done in afternoon! You take number four son up and wash for lunch!!\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss turned quickly to obey the cook, not wanting to get on his bad side so close to mealtime.<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe isn\u2019t it your day to help with Benny?\u201d Adam asked, raising an accusatory eyebrow.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019d better go help him,\u201d Joe said, laughing, \u201cI suppose Hoss\u2019ll need a hand anyway, especially with Hop Sing in that temperament!\u201d He nodded politely at their guest and excused himself to go into the house.<\/p>\n

Suppressing their own grins, Ben and Adam turned their attention back to their guest.<\/p>\n

\u201cAs I was saying,\u201d Mr. Whitaker continued, obviously annoyed by the interruption. \u201cI need to speak to you regarding the custody of your son, umm\u2026\u201d He looked down at his file and read, \u201cBenjamin Joseph Cartwright, Jr.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cCustody?\u201d Adam asked, unsure whether he\u2019d heard the man correctly.<\/p>\n

Whitaker took no notice of Adam, as he handed a stack of papers to Ben.<\/p>\n

\u201cI have here a summons for you to appear in court in thirty days for the judge in Carson City to determine the rightful custody of your son.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRightful custody?\u201d Ben said with a chuckle, \u201cWhy, who else would have rightful custody? He\u2019s my<\/em> son.\u201d<\/p>\n

Mr. Whitaker looked down at his file again and read, \u201cMrs. Genevieve Marceau Cartwright Richardson vs. Benjamin J. Cartwright, Sr.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat?\u201d<\/em>>\/i> \u00a0Ben exclaimed, his face turning red. \u201cShe can\u2019t do that! Not [I]now[\/I]<\/em>! This is utterly absurd!\u201d<\/p>\n

The gentleman\u2019s mustache twitched.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe thought you might react this way, so she\u2019s arranged for her sister, one\u2026\u201d he read his file again, \u201cJeanette Marceau Blakely to have a preliminary meeting with you on Monday in Virginia City.\u201d<\/p>\n

This was ludicrous. Ben wanted to pull the man out of his buggy with his bare hands and show him just how funny this little gag was not.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe is expecting you at two o\u2019clock Monday afternoon at the law office of Edward Smith. Good day gentlemen.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWait, hold on a second,\u201d Adam reached grabbed the horse\u2019s bridle to stay the buggy, \u201cWhat is all this about?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI am not at liberty to divulge any information at present. I have agreed to represent Mrs. Richardson and will spend the next thirty days preparing her case for court. I suggest you do the same. Good day.\u201d<\/p>\n

He snapped the reins and Adam dropped his hand just as the horse started forward.<\/p>\n

The two men stood staring after the buggy, completely taken aback by the previous exchange.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, Pa, what do you make of that?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know, son.\u201d\u00a0 Ben scowled, \u201cBut on Monday we\u2019re going to Ed\u2019s office to find out just what\u2019s going on.\u201d<\/p>\n

With that they turned and headed inside for lunch.<\/p>\n

Chapter 2 \u2013 Why Now?<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cAlright, Benny, time to go upstairs,\u201d Joe said as he pushed his chair away from the dining table. They\u2019d managed to wake the boy for lunch and now the task fell to Joe to try and get him to take a real nap so that everyone could actually get some afternoon work done.<\/p>\n

Benny finished the last of his milk and wiped his mouth on his sleeve. Ben raised an eyebrow and glared at his youngest. Benny looked at him sheepishly.<\/p>\n

\u201cSorry, Pa,\u201d he said as he picked up his napkin and wiped his mouth with it.<\/p>\n

With renewed energy, Benny jumped out of his seat and skipped over to the great room where Joe was now waiting for him. He grabbed his older brother\u2019s hand as the two ascended the stairs.<\/p>\n

In his bedroom, Benny chattered non-stop about everything while his brother removed his boots and unbuttoned his shirt. Joe laid his brother down and covered him with an afghan. Benny was still talking.<\/p>\n

\u201cAll right now,\u201d Joe hushed him with a finger on the boy\u2019s lips. \u201cTime to go to sleep now.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHmm?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026I\u2019m not tired\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, it jest don\u2019t make any sense, her wantin\u2019 him back now.\u201d Hoss hit the table with his hand. The china clattered and clinked in response.<\/p>\n

Joe sat down at his seat, having just returned from Benny\u2019s room. He\u2019d had to just leave the boy in his room to lie down quietly in the hopes that he\u2019d get some semblance of a nap.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf she wanted to see Benny, why didn\u2019t she just come and ask us?\u201d Adam asked, knowing inwardly that he probably wouldn\u2019t have approved of her seeing Benny even in that instance.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, we won\u2019t know until we find out. Which is exactly what I intend to do Monday at two o\u2019clock,\u201d Ben said, taking a sip of his coffee.<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss and Joe, why don\u2019t you two hang around the house Monday with Benny so Adam and I can get this matter straightened out with Ed Smith.\u201d The men nodded in unison. \u201cBenny will have his chores to keep him busy, so that should give you two plenty of time to finish with that corral fence. Oh, and see that one of you stays in the house during his nap \u2013 he\u2019s been waking up early lately. Sometimes he\u2019s outside and off to all manner of places before I even realize he\u2019s awake.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPa\u2026\u201d Adam said, grimacing slightly, \u201cDon\u2019t you think maybe Benny\u2019s getting a little too old for naps?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben sighed and took a sip of his coffee. \u201cI suppose you\u2019re right\u2026 it\u2019s just so\u2026 peaceful in the afternoons\u2026\u201d Ben trailed off at the sober look his eldest gave him. \u201cOh all right,\u201d he conceded at last, \u201cBy the end of summer\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam crossed his arms and shook his head.<\/p>\n

\u201cNext month?\u2026 next week?\u201d Ben\u2019s face held a slight smirk. He was well aware of how much they all babied the youngest member of their family. Benny was so little and easy to coddle.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, somebody\u2019s gotta do all the nappin\u2019 round here and if Benny ain\u2019t gonna do it\u2026\u201d all eyes turned to Hoss, who held a serious, thoughtful face, \u201cI\u2019ll make the sacrifice and do it myself.\u201d<\/p>\n

Laughter filled the dining room. That afternoon the men went about their chores with a light heart, seeing nothing about Monday\u2019s meeting to be terribly concerned with.<\/p>\n

Chapter 3 \u2013 The Meeting<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ed\u2019s head came up from his files at the sound of his office door opening. He stood up and adjusted his spectacles.<\/p>\n

\u201cHello Ed,\u201d Ben said, shaking his friend\u2019s hand.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey Ben. Adam.\u201d He nodded to each. \u201cCome. Sit down\u2026Mrs. Blakely isn\u2019t here yet, but it\u2019s still ten minutes to two.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ed felt an uncomfortable silence fill the air. He wasn\u2019t sure exactly what to tell his good friend of fifteen years. He\u2019d frowned when he\u2019d read through the papers he\u2019d received from Mr. Whitaker. Even so, Ed felt confident the judge would side with Ben. Women rarely got custody of their children in cases such as this. He\u2019d never handled a custody case personally, but he\u2019d read about them in school.<\/p>\n

\u201cCan I get either of you some coffee?\u201d Ed managed, glad to finally have something to say.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, thanks.\u201d<\/p>\n

Okay, then. Back to silence. Ed could hardly stand the tension in the room. No one liked to bring up Ben\u2019s failed marriage. After Genevieve had finally managed to convince Ben to sign the divorce papers, Ed had taken on the unpleasant task of handling the affairs of it all for his friend. Once that was done with, Ed was more than happy to never mention it again. Now, here it was, working its way back out of the closet. He pitied Ben. He was too good a man to have to suffer this kind of humiliation.<\/p>\n

Ed could still think of nothing appropriate to say. The other two men must have sensed his discomfort, and Ed was relieved when Adam opened his mouth to offer up a bit of small talk.<\/p>\n

\u201cDid you fair well in that trial with that miner over in Placerville, Ed?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ed winced. Perhaps the uncomfortable silence would have been better, he thought.<\/p>\n

\u201cUmm\u2026no\u2026actually we lost our case,\u201d he began slowly, \u201cIt seems Schuller never owned the mine after all\u2026 There was no way for me to know,\u201d he ended lamely.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s too bad\u2026\u201d The words had barely left Adam\u2019s mouth when the door opened. The three gentlemen stood up as Jeanette Blakely entered the building.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I\u2026uh\u2026don\u2019t guess introductions are necessary\u2026\u201d Ed said, nodding toward the three standing opposite him.<\/p>\n

\u201cJeanette,\u201d Ben said as he and Adam nodded politely at the woman.<\/p>\n

She wore an elaborate green satin hoop-dress with a dainty lace trim. The bodice of her dress angled down to an alarmingly small waistline. Her raven hair was neat and tidy under a matching bonnet that tied into an enormous bow under her chin. Ed thought her attire seemed terribly out of place in their rough, western surroundings.<\/p>\n

\u201cGood afternoon, Ben,\u201d she said as she untied and removed her bonnet.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know that you\u2019ve ever met my eldest son, Adam,\u201d Ben motioned to the dark figure standing to his left.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I don\u2019t believe so, but I remember you speaking of him,\u201d she said pleasantly.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, shall we get down to business?\u201d Ed blurted out, ready to get this over with.<\/p>\n

Everyone sat down. Jeanette spoke first.<\/p>\n

“As you know, my sister, Genevieve, wants her son back. She requested that I come speak to you and answer any questions you may have.\u201d<\/p>\n

In spite of her formal manner, it appeared to Ed that the woman did not look comfortable being put in the middle of this.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell,\u201d Ben began, his temper simmering, \u201cMy first question is\u2026 why does she suddenly want custody? She left him with me \u2013 no sent<\/em> him to me. During the divorce\u2026\u201d Ben hesitated, and Ed knew his friend was still not comfortable with the word, \u201c\u2026she said she wanted nothing from me. Not money, not even our son. She said she simply needed to be free of attachment.\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette paused a moment, seeming to collect her thoughts before answering. Ed sat back in his chair, feeling more like a nosey fly on the wall than a participant in the session.<\/p>\n

\u201cGenevieve is quite changed from the woman you married eight years ago. She\u2019s married again. She has always regretted being parted from her son. She is very motivated to see him return.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat makes her think she even has a right to him after all these years?\u201d Adam asked, exasperation in his tone.<\/p>\n

Jeanette looked as though she might cry at his harsh words. Suddenly, she threw her hands up, abandoning all attempts at formality.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, I told her that! I told her it was selfish to pull the child away from his home. Away from the only family he\u2019s ever known, just to ease her own conscience.\u201d She dabbed at her eyes with her white lace handkerchief. \u201cShe is<\/em> a good woman, but now she\u2019s\u2026 well, now she must have him back, and she is very intent on accomplishing it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJeanette,\u201d Ben began, his words slow and deliberate, \u201cyou may tell Genevieve that for five and a half years Benny has lived with me in my house. During that time, I<\/em> diapered him, I<\/em>>\/i> fed him, I<\/em> watched his first steps, I<\/em> heard his first words. I<\/em> was the one who sat at his bedside for three days when he came down with the fever last spring. I<\/em> was the one who bandaged every scrape and wiped every tear. His home is on the Ponderosa, and that<\/em> is where he will stay.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBen, you don\u2019t understand-\u201c she stopped with a choked sob as if there was more to say \u2013 more that needed saying \u2013 but not by her.<\/p>\n

Silence hung in the air. Ed shifted uncomfortably in his chair. The tension in the room was unbearably thick. He reached up to loosen his necktie as Jeanette spoke again, calmer.<\/p>\n

\u201cBen, you need to know that her lawyer feels strongly that they have a good case. You\u2019d better be prepared for whatever he\u2019s got concocted.\u201d<\/p>\n

Her words stopped Ed\u2019s heart. Was this truly something they needed to be worried about? Divorces were rare, but he\u2019d never heard of a judge ruling in favor of a mother in a custody hearing. Ed looked at Ben. His expression was one of frustration and doubt. Everyone in the room was speechless again for several moments.<\/p>\n

At last Ben spoke, \u201cThank you Jeanette \u2013 for coming here and for trying\u2026\u201d he stopped, and Ed wondered momentarily if this rock of a man might just break down into sobs.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere was one other thing,\u201d Jeanette said hesitantly, \u201cShe wanted me to see the boy\u2026 to\u2026 see that he\u2019s well.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s eyes lowered to the ground. He nodded dumbly and finally said, \u201cI\u2019ll\u2026send one of the boys to get you day after tomorrow\u2026 You can come out and see him then\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette offered a rather weak, but understanding smile and excused herself saying, \u201cThank you, I\u2019d better go now \u2013 I\u2019m \u2026I\u2019m really very sorry about\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben continued staring at the ground and nodded again. She left, quietly seeing herself out.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, Ed,\u201d Adam sighed, \u201cWhat do we need to do now?\u201d<\/p>\n

Chapter 4 \u2013 Alphabet Popcorn<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cBen, I\u2019m going to need to reset his shoulder,\u201d Doc Martin said, raising his voice to be heard over Benny\u2019s cries of pain.<\/p>\n

Ben nodded, praying that it could be done swiftly and efficiently.<\/p>\n

\u201cFirst I want to give him some of this.\u201d Paul poured a bit of white powder into a glass of water. Lifting Benny\u2019s head, he encouraged the boy to drink. Before long, the crying ceased \u2013 though the child\u2019s chest heaved with an occasional whimper.<\/p>\n

Paul looked at Ben, giving him a nod. Ben leaned over and pressed his son\u2019s body to the bed. He winced as he felt the jerk but was relieved to feel the undeniable popping sound of the joint righting itself. He looked down. Benny was out cold.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe should sleep through the night,\u201d Paul explained as he closed up his medical bag. \u201cWhen he wakes up, it\u2019ll be mighty sore. I left some medicine on the nightstand there.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded and ushered Paul to the door of Benny\u2019s bedroom. Benny mumbled something and Ben turned, curiously.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, don\u2019t mind that, Ben\u2026 sometimes that medicine does funny things to children\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben raised his eyebrow curiously at his friend.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019ll probably talk in his sleep off and on throughout the night \u2013 probably wouldn\u2019t be a bad idea for you and the boys to take turns sitting up with him tonight.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded again and the two left the room quietly.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Ben sat with his elbows on the desk and rested his head in hands. His eyes were burning. He looked at the clock. It was nearly midnight. He sighed, looking at the stack of papers before him. As best he could figure, he\u2019d located all the documents Ed had requested earlier that afternoon, including his divorce papers and the letter Genevieve had sent from New Orleans along with Benny. Stacking the papers neatly, he stood to go upstairs.<\/p>\n

Nearing his bedroom, he noticed all of the bedroom doors standing wide. That was odd. Joe should have been in with Benny, and he\u2019d thought Adam and Hoss had gone to bed an hour ago. Suddenly, he heard hushed laughter coming from Benny\u2019s room. He went to investigate.<\/p>\n

Upon entering, he found each of his grown sons sitting in chairs, feet propped up on the edge of Benny\u2019s bed. Joe, who was in the middle, held a large bowl of popped corn in his lap. Strewn across the bed and floor were bits of popcorn.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat in the world are you three doing?\u201d he asked quietly, though his voice held a hint of irritability. \u201cYou\u2019re going to wake him up.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, Pa\u2026this is great\u2026. Watch this.\u201d Joe launched a kernel, hitting his little brother in the forehead.<\/p>\n

\u201cJOE!\u201d Ben hissed quietly.<\/p>\n

Benny\u2019s head sprang up. \u201cA \u2013 B \u2013 C \u2013 D \u2013 E \u2013 F \u2013 G!\u201d he yelled out, then dropped his head back on the pillow.<\/p>\n

Ben stared at his son, startled by the outburst.<\/p>\n

Adam, Hoss and Joe snickered again, covering their mouths with their hands.<\/p>\n

Hoss tossed another kernel, hitting the boy in the chin.<\/p>\n

Benny\u2019s head came up again, \u201cH \u2013 I \u2013 J \u2013 K \u2013 L \u2013 M \u2013 N \u2013 O \u2013 P!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss!\u201d Before Ben could reprimand him, Adam hurled another bit of corn.<\/p>\n

\u201cQ \u2013 R \u2013 S \u2013 T \u2013 U \u2013 V!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, now that\u2019s enough!\u201d Ben grabbed the bowl and shooed the men out of the room.<\/p>\n

Still laughing, they left the room, giving each other congratulatory claps to the back.<\/p>\n

Ben rolled his eyes at them and turned to check on Benny. He was still quite asleep, despite his alphabetory outbursts. Ben sat down in the rocker next to the bed, nibbling on a few kernels from the bowl now in his lap.<\/p>\n

He eyed a kernel in his hand. Glancing up sheepishly at his young son, he tossed the piece. It bounced off Benny\u2019s ear.<\/p>\n

\u201cW \u2013 X \u2013 Y \u2013 Z!\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s eyes widened as he heard the laughter coming from the doorway. He turned to see three faces red from laughter. His face broke into a smile.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow you three get!\u201d He tossed a handful of popped corn at the door, scattering them.<\/p>\n

Chapter 5 \u2013 Aunt Jeanette<\/strong><\/p>\n

At the sound of a buggy pulling into the yard, Ben rose to open the door to the ranch house. Benny sat on the hearth, making no move to join his father at the door. He took this opportunity, while his father\u2019s back was turned, to tug on his uncomfortable necktie. He wore a clean white shirt and his good trousers. His left arm hung in a securely bound sling. After tugging on the tie, he ran his hand behind his neck to pull back on the fabric of the sling. He felt as though, between the two, they were choking him from both sides.<\/p>\n

He wasn\u2019t exactly sure why they were all dressed up. Sunday had been only three days prior and already he had to wear the bothersome tie a second time.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny, come here son.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny abandoned his attempt at loosening the tie and went to stand next to his father. Hoss had just halted the carriage and was helping Jeanette out.<\/p>\n

\u201cGood morning, Jeanette,\u201d Ben said, his tone neutral.<\/p>\n

Benny walked to meet his father on the porch. Ben didn\u2019t move to greet the women, but stood back near the door, one hand resting rather possessively on his young son\u2019s good shoulder.<\/p>\n

\u201cGood morning,\u201d she answered happily, \u201cI enjoyed getting acquainted with your son Horse \u2013 I mean\u2026\u201d she stopped, trying to remember the pronunciation, \u201cHoss.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss grinned and nodded in affirmation.<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd this must be Ben Junior,\u201d Jeanette smiled warmly at the boy.<\/p>\n

Benny blushed. He knew that was technically his name, but he felt a bit uncomfortable being called by his father\u2019s version of the name.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe just call him Benny, ma\u2019am,\u201d Hoss said.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, Benny, what in heaven\u2019s name did you do to your arm?\u201d she asked pointing to the arm cradled safely in the confines of the white fabric.<\/p>\n

\u201cSport knocked me down while I\u2019as holdin\u2019im fer Adam.\u201d He explained quietly. Then decided to hide slightly from the woman behind his father\u2019s legs.<\/p>\n

\u201cSport?\u201d She addressed the question to Ben, hoping he would translate.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam\u2019s horse. He has a bad habit of throwing his head. It happened on Monday, after we met with you. Benny was holding him for Adam and got distracted and Sport jerked him pretty hard. He lost his balance and fell against the corral fence. It dislocated his shoulder a bit, but Doc Martin said it could have been a lot worse,\u201d Ben explained.<\/p>\n

The distress in her eyes testified to her naivety about life on a working ranch. For those that lived in this environment, mishaps like that were commonplace. To Jeanette, however, the thought of anyone \u2013 especially a child \u2013 enduring such an event, was horrifying. Her expression then turned from alarm to sympathy as her maternal instinct prevailed over her shock.<\/p>\n

Benny walked over to Hoss and gently tugged on his vest with his free hand, all the while keeping an apprehensive eye on the stranger who seemed to be watching him closely.<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss? You \u2018member what you said yesterday \u2013 \u2018bout how if I\u2019as real good and didn\u2019t cry much when Doc Martin came?\u201d His voice was almost a whisper as he looked up with hopeful eyes.<\/p>\n

Hoss smiled and reached into his vest pocket.<\/p>\n

\u201cShore do \u2013 an\u2019 you was real brave when he come. Took it like a man I reckon,\u201d Hoss winked as he presented a peppermint stick to the boy. Benny\u2019s face lit up. The mercantile hadn\u2019t had peppermint sticks in months. They were his favorite.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow, you\u2019d better wait till after lunch to eat that\u2019er Hop Sing\u2019ll have my hide!\u201d Hoss warned.<\/p>\n

Benny nodded and obediently stuffed the candy into the pocket of his trousers.<\/p>\n

With that the four went inside and made their way to the sitting area. Jeanette seated herself on the settee, while Ben went to his usual chair. Hoss eased himself into the blue chair opposite his father\u2019s. Normally, he preferred to sit on the hearth or the settee when the family gathered in this room but that seemed a tad too informal at the moment. He didn\u2019t dare sit on the settee either, though there was an empty space next to Jeanette. He had no idea how her large hoop-dress worked, and he wasn\u2019t about to risk finding out now by sitting clumsily next to her. No, he was safest in the blue chair.<\/p>\n

Ben held his arm out to Benny, who moved to his father\u2019s side.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny, I\u2019d like to introduce you to Jeanette Blakely. She is your aunt.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPleased to meet\u2019cha,\u201d Benny mumbled shyly.<\/p>\n

Ben took a deep breath and continued, \u201cYour Aunt Jeanette is\u2026your mother\u2019s<\/em> sister.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben had steeled himself for an endless barrage of questions from the boy about his mother. Instead, the child just calmly stood there, waiting for his father to continue.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe wanted to finally meet you. She\u2019s from New Orleans.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLike Joe?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, that\u2019s right.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny looked the woman over. She was dressed differently than the other women he knew. She was very pleasant looking, though, the boy reasoned. Even pretty.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny, I\u2019m looking forward to getting acquainted with you.\u201d<\/p>\n

Though her voice was soft and inviting, Ben could feel the boy\u2019s body become tense. Benny looked quickly to the ground, shying away from her gaze.<\/p>\n

She continued, \u201cAre you in school yet?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo ma\u2019am. Ya have ta be six at the start of school to go.\u201d Then he brought his head up slowly, his eyes meeting hers, \u201cBut\u2026 I can a\u2019ready spell\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy that\u2019s wonderful!\u201d She clapped her hands together, \u201cand what can you spell?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny instantly perked up and a smile came to his face. He loved spelling! He stood up straight, good arm at his side.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenjamin. B-E-N-J-A-M-I-N Benjamin. Cartwright. C-A-R-T-W-R-I-H<\/em>–G<\/em>\u2026I mean\u2026G-H<\/em>-T Cartwright.\u201d He recited each letter proudly. \u201cThe \u2018G\u2019 is what\u2019cha call \u2018silent\u2019,\u201d he explained.<\/p>\n

Jeanette applauded.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, now I believe your going to go to the head of the class next fall!\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben smiled proudly, \u201cAdam works with him every night on letters and numbers\u2026 it\u2019s sort of their special time together.\u201d<\/p>\n

The rest of the morning went thus. Benny felt more and more relaxed with his aunt. He enjoyed the way she doted over him. She praised him for his knowledge of animals and ranching when he took her to the barn to show her the horses. She made him feel as though he were very grown up \u2013 with something important to say.<\/p>\n

The morning\u2019s events eventually took their toll on the boy and Benny whispered complaints in his father\u2019s ear about his shoulder hurting. Ben nodded and sent him in to Hop Sing to take some of the medicine Doc Martin had left for him.<\/p>\n

After lunch, the group moved to the Great Room. They hadn\u2019t been there more than a few minutes when Ben noticed his youngest son\u2019s head nodding. He nudged Hoss with a wink.<\/p>\n

\u201cThem pills put him right to sleep\u2026\u201d Hoss nudged the boy, who slowly opened his heavy eyelids.<\/p>\n

\u201cC\u2019mon, why don\u2019t we go put you in yer bed.\u2019<\/p>\n

\u201cBut I\u2019m not tired\u2026\u201d Benny said, his eyes closing again.<\/p>\n

\u201cI can see that,\u201d Hoss answered with a smile, \u201cLet\u2019s go.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny stood, his eyes closing again, and allowed his big brother to steer him in the right direction. After a few faltering steps Hoss bent down and scooped the boy up into one arm and carried him up the stairs and to his bedroom.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe\u2019s nice\u2026\u201d Benny mumbled.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, I reckon she is at that,\u201d Hoss said.<\/p>\n

Benny sat on his bed, slumping in exhaustion. Hoss untied the boy\u2019s necktie and put it on the dresser. He then turned his attention to delicately removing Benny\u2019s arm from the sling. After unbuttoning his shirt, he gingerly slipped it off the boy\u2019s back. Hoss frowned as his eye caught the unsightly bruise that had formed around the child\u2019s shoulder. Carefully, he replaced the arm in the sling. Benny winced quietly.<\/p>\n

\u201cSorry \u2018bout that,\u201d Hoss said, tossing the shirt onto the rocking chair. \u201cAll right, down with ya now.\u201d He helped his little brother lay down, taking care not to jar the offended shoulder.<\/p>\n

\u201cI never had no aunt before,\u201d Benny said as Hoss covered him with a blanket.<\/p>\n

Hoss had to agree, the woman was very nice, but the whole ordeal surrounding her made him very skeptical. He wasn\u2019t sure what response to give the boy, but it didn\u2019t matter since Benny was already snoring softly. Hoss smiled and gave his brother a kiss on his forehead.<\/p>\n

\u201cSleep tight.\u201d<\/p>\n

As Hoss rounded the corner to descend the staircase, he heard two familiar voices in the great room. Adam and Joe had finished their work in the north pasture and had returned home. They were now deep in conversation with their father and their guest.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy does she feel she has such a strong case?\u201d Adam was asking.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, I can\u2019t figure how a judge would ever rule against Pa,\u201d Joe added.<\/p>\n

Jeanette took a deep breath, wondering how to explain what she herself didn\u2019t exactly understand.<\/p>\n

\u201cTimes are changing,\u201d she offered at last, \u201cJudges don\u2019t automatically rule in favor of paternal custody anymore. They\u2019re beginning to side almost entirely with the mother, especially where young children are concerned. I suppose they figure a child\u2019s place is with his mother. It has something to do with a law that was passed in England several years ago.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI read about it,\u201d Adam said, trying to recall the article he\u2019d read a while back. \u201cSeems a lot of judges there have been ruling solely in favor of maternal custody for a while now.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss frowned. He wasn\u2019t sure what they were talking about and didn\u2019t feel like it was an appropriate time to ask them to fill him in on the bits of the conversation he\u2019d missed. He was trying to piece all of their legal talk together in his mind, with no success. One thing he didn\u2019t miss; whatever it was they were talking about didn\u2019t bode well for any of them \u2013 especially for Benny.<\/p>\n

Chapter 6 \u2013 Getting Ready<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201c\u2019The warden paid no attention to anything under Joseph\u2019s care, because the Lord was with Joseph and gave him success in whatever he did,\u2019\u201d Ben finished as he closed the Bible, \u201cand with that, it\u2019s bedtime.\u201d<\/p>\n

He put Benny down from his lap. He\u2019d been rocking his son as he read.<\/p>\n

\u201cLet\u2019s check on that shoulder before you go to bed.\u201d Ben laid the Bible on the dresser and unbuttoned the top few buttons of Benny\u2019s night shirt.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, do you s\u2019pose Joseph was scared when his brothers sold\u2019im to those men as a slave?\u201d Benny asked. \u201cAnd then to get put in prison fer\u2019 somethin\u2019 he didn\u2019t even do\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, I suppose he was probably terrified,\u201d Ben poked the child\u2019s shoulder a bit to see that the joint was still in its proper place.\u00a0 He eyed the dark bluish-purple coloring to the skin. Hoss had been right, it was a \u201cdilly of a bruise.\u201d Well, at least nothing had been broken. The bruise would disappear in time and the ache would soon be manageable without a sling.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019d be scary to be forced away from yer home like that,\u201d the child continued. \u201cWhy d\u2019ya s\u2019pose God let that happen?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, remember that God used all those bad things to bring about something very good in the end.\u201d Ben finished his exam and righted the boy\u2019s shirt, \u201cBut that\u2019s a reading for another night\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPa?\u201d Benny said as he laid down.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, son?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cKinda makes a body happy for his home and family, don\u2019t it?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben tucked the covers around the boy\u2019s small frame and planted a kiss on his forehead.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, son, it sure does. Good night.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLoves ya.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI love you, too.\u201d<\/p>\n

With that, Ben blew out the lamp and left the room.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

The weeks that followed were full of visits to Virginia City to see Ed Smith to prepare their case. The whole family was feeling the strain as they attempted to keep up with the running of the ranch and their own chores. Ben had had to apologize a number of times to one or another of his sons who\u2019d had to shoulder his end of the workload while he met with Ed.<\/p>\n

When the thirty days had ended, it was Adam and Ben who went to Carson City, while Hoss and Little Joe stayed back with Benny. They had opted not to mention anything to him about it, seeing no need to alarm him until there was something to truly be worried about.<\/p>\n

Chapter 7 \u2013 The Proceedings Begin<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ben walked the short distance across the courtroom to where his son and lawyer sat, talking quietly. Around him was an ever-growing crowd of people who had come, for all Ben could figure, out of simple nosiness. He ignored their stares and continued walking.<\/p>\n

\u201cHi, Ben,\u201d Ed Smith said looking at his pocketwatch. \u201cWe should be getting started shortly.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded and sat down between him and Adam. The crowd began to murmur behind him, and he turned in his chair to see what the commotion was about. His heart fell. It was Genevieve.<\/p>\n

She was at the back of the courtroom, speaking to her lawyer. Her dress was a charming shade of pale blue. A faint smile came to his lips. She\u2019d always looked lovely in blue.<\/p>\n

Genevieve turned and moved toward the front of the room, her skirt making great sweeping motions in perfect resonance with her movements. As she neared where he sat, their eyes met. Ben\u2019s heart stopped. He couldn\u2019t quite read her expression. Pity? Remorse? Fear? The moment passed and she was soon seated at the table opposite them with her sister and lawyer.<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s eyes fell to the floor. He hadn\u2019t given much thought to how painful it would be to see her again. As the judge entered, Ben set his jaw stubbornly and pushed the thoughts from his mind.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Whitaker, do not quote British law to me!\u201d Judge Nelson\u2019s voice echoed in the small courthouse. \u201cMay I kindly remind you that we are in America \u2013 not England!\u201d<\/p>\n

Mr. Whitaker\u2019s mustache twitched a few times as he calculated his next words.<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course, Your Honor,\u201d Whitaker said, \u201cbut if you\u2019ll allow me to continue, I\u2019ll kindly explain how it pertains.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAlright,\u201d the judge sighed in irritation, \u201cbut please do get on with it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThank you. It\u2019s no secret that, for a number of years now, England has been observing a strict rule concerning the custody of children in divorce cases. You will note here,\u201d he placed a document onto the judge\u2019s bench for his perusal, \u201c\u2018Lord Talfourd\u2019s Act\u2019 of 1839 began to divert custody of children under the age of seven almost entirely to their mothers. As you well know, this has helped to bring about the institution of the \u2018Tender Years Doctrine,\u2019 both in Great Britain as well as here in America. I\u2019m simply asking that the tradition of this doctrine be upheld in this case.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Whitaker, need I remind you that \u2018tradition of doctrine\u2019 is not law,\u201d the judge removed his spectacles as he spoke, \u201cAnd I will ask you to please remember that I will award custody to whichever parent I deem most fit to properly raise the boy \u2013 regardless of where \u2018tradition\u2019 may lean.\u201d<\/p>\n

Judge Nelson stacked the documents and laid them aside. Folding his hands and leaning into his bench, he continued. \u201cIs there anything else, Mr. Whitaker?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo sir, not at this time.\u201d Whitaker turned to go sit down, a smug grin playing across his lips.<\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Smith? Are you ready?\u201d The judge addressed Ed.<\/p>\n

Ed nodded and stood to approach the floor, a few papers in his hand.<\/p>\n

\u201cYour Honor, I would like to begin by stating a number of facts that cannot simply be dismissed in a case such as this.\u201d Ed shifted his weight to one leg and put his free hand into the pocket of his trousers. \u201cEight years ago, my client married Genevieve Marceau. One year later, she left him \u2013 offering very little in the way of an explanation to her husband or his family. Approximately fourteen months after that, she sent her six-month old son \u2013 by mail, mind you \u2013 back to Mr. Cartwright, along with a short letter. Four months later, she petitioned for a divorce and six months after that, my client finally conceded.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m aware of the facts Mr. Smith,\u201d the judge remarked flatly.<\/p>\n

Ed did not respond to the judge\u2019s comment, but simply continued. \u201cI say all of that to ask one question: Are these the actions of a mother who is acting in the best interest of her child? No! These, in fact, are the actions of a mother who has not heeded the very principles under which the Tender Years Doctrine was born.\u201d Ed was pacing the floor in front of the judge, waving the papers he held in the air as he spoke, \u201cShe has intentionally severed all ties with this child during his most formative years.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ed stopped his pacing and looked squarely at Mr. Whitaker, though still addressing the judge.<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd I would like to remind the court of an 1842 case,\u201d he approached the bench, laying a stack of documents in front of the judge, \u201cin which custody was awarded to the mother, in light of this Tender Years Doctrine, but was reverted back to the father a mere two years later.\u201d<\/p>\n

The judge scanned the document before him, nodding his recollection of the very controversial case. At length, he laid the papers down and, with a heavy sigh, called for a short recess.<\/p>\n

The day dragged on and on. Ben had found himself becoming increasingly irritated at the proceedings. Ed had produced enough documentation to warrant an open and shut case. By the time he was called up for questioning, Ben\u2019s temper was threatening to boil over.<\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Cartwright, you reside on a little ranch outside of Virginia City, is that right?\u201d Whitaker\u2019s face held, what Ben reasoned to be, the most unconvincing smile he\u2019d ever seen.<\/p>\n

There were several snickers heard around the room and the judge tapped his gavel a few times to restore order.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, I live on a ranch \u2013 the Ponderosa,\u201d Ben affirmed, ignoring the \u201clittle ranch\u201d comment. \u201cAnd it is quite outside the town lines of Virginia City.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat must take a lot of work to run a ranch. Especially while trying to raise a young child.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, it is a lot of work. But it\u2019s nothing I haven\u2019t done before. Don\u2019t forget I have raised three other sons \u2013 on our ranch.\u201d<\/p>\n

Whitaker nodded and began a slow pacing of the floor in front of Ben.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes of course\u2026 So, with all of the work that needs to be done, I would imagine everyone would have to do their fair share of the work. Is that correct, Mr. Cartwright?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben frowned, unsure of where this was leading.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, yes, we all work very hard. We take pride in our land and do what is necessary to make it prosper.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cEven Benny?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, he doesn\u2019t exactly go driving cattle to market or anything, but yes, he has chores that are his responsibility.\u201d<\/p>\n

Whitaker nodded and gave him another \u201cinnocent smile\u201d that made Ben want to throw him into the nearest water trough.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou love your son dearly, don\u2019t you Mr. Cartwright?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben rolled his eyes. \u201cWould I be here otherwise?!\u201d<\/p>\n

Whitaker smiled again, seemingly unbothered by Ben\u2019s near-outburst.<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course you do\u2026. But, um, could you tell me briefly what happened about a year ago?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben thought for a moment and finally shrugged, unable to cipher what the man was referring to.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry, let me refresh your memory: You had just assigned Benny \u2013 who had only just turned five at the time \u2013 the chore of toting water in from the well for your house cook\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben scowled. Now he knew where this was going. He lowered his eyebrows evenly, giving Whitaker a hard glare.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe hadn\u2019t been doing that chore for very long, when\u2026. Would you like to explain what happened, or should I?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s jaw muscles rippled with tension, as he continued to stared at the man.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat was a freak accident, Mr. Whitaker,\u201d Ben said slowly, attempting to keep a tight rein on his emotions.<\/p>\n

There was a silence that filled the air that seemed to last for an eternity. Both men remained silent, each daring the other to continue.<\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Cartwright,\u201d Judge Nelson leaned over his bench towards Ben as he spoke, \u201cplease answer the question.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben sighed in defeat.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny was pulling a bucket of water from the well, when a portion of the wall gave way\u2026 he fell in\u2026. several neighbors came to help, but it still took nearly a day and a half to dig him out\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Whitaker\u2019s head nodded again. Ben was getting about tired of seeing the man repeat the gesture every time he answered a question.<\/p>\n

\u201cYour Honor,\u201d Ben said at last, turning to the judge, \u201cI fail to see what any of this has to do with\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Cartwright!\u201d Whitaker exclaimed, cutting him off, \u201cIf you cannot see the dangers posed to a small child by life on a ranch, then perhaps you are not as protective and loving a father as you presume yourself to be!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll have you know\u2026\u201d Ben\u2019s voice boomed in the small room as he pointed a sturdy finger in the man\u2019s face.<\/p>\n

He was interrupted by the judge\u2019s gavel. \u201cMr. Cartwright, no emotional outbursts will be tolerated.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben pursed his lips, anger still evident in his face. He nodded and sat back in his chair. Whitaker continued.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt is of little wonder any of your sons survived to adulthood with the constant danger that you inflict upon them. Why didn\u2019t young Benny suffer a dislocated shoulder only one month ago, while tending to a horse for his brother? Why on earth was a child allowed in the presence of such a beast?!\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s eyes darted to Jeanette. He could tell by the tears in her eyes, that she\u2019d not been aware the information about Benny\u2019s injury would be used in court. Ben turned his attention back to the lawyer, who was now addressing the judge.<\/p>\n

\u201cYour Honor, I am not suggesting to you that Mrs. Richardson has not obviously made some mistakes, but my very conscience will not allow me to stand aimlessly by and watch a man abuse his own child.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAbuse?\u201d Ben rose to his feet, towering over the lawyer.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, \u2018abuse\u2019 Mr. Cartwright! Intentionally placing your child in harms way is no less atrocious than if you\u2019d caused him harm by your own hand!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Whitaker, let me just tell you something\u2026.\u201d Ben spoke deliberately, each words fairly dripping with venom.<\/p>\n

The judge\u2019s gavel fell several times, drowning out the sound of Ben\u2019s voice.<\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Cartwright, you have already been warned! Another outburst and you\u2019ll forfeit your case!\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben huffed, eyeing Whitaker with a threatening gaze.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo further questions, Your Honor.\u201d<\/p>\n

Chapter 8 \u2013 Like Sand Through His Fingers<\/strong><\/p>\n

The courthouse was warm and stuffy. Ben ran a hand over the weathered features of his face. He was exhausted. The proceedings had taken two full days and the judge would soon be announcing his decision. He looked at his pocket watch. It was time.<\/p>\n

Everyone stood as the judge entered the court. Ben felt a pang of fear with each quickening heartbeat.<\/p>\n

\u201cAfter hearing testimony from each side and carefully weighing it with what\u2019s best for the child\u2026\u201d The judge was speaking slowly, and Ben found himself becoming increasingly agitated and impatient.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026I hereby award custody to Mrs. Richardson, effective Monday morning at ten o\u2019clock in the morning. For a period of adjustment, I\u2019m ordering six months with no contact on the paternal side.\u201d His gavel slammed twice. Ben thought it may as well have been the sound of his world falling in around him.<\/p>\n

Ben sat down and put his head in his hands. What had just happened? Surely it wasn\u2019t over already\u2026 The courtroom was clearing, and the murmur of people slowly faded to silence. Silence. Ben could hear his own breathing and it seemed to be very loud. He felt weary and old.<\/p>\n

Surely the judge would walk back in and claim he\u2019d made a mistake. Ben waited. Nothing. Just silence.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa,\u201d Adam\u2019s voice startled him. \u201cWe need to go home now\u2026and tell Benny.\u201d<\/p>\n

Of course. Adam was right. Good old Adam. Always levelheaded in times like this. What would he do without Adam? What would he do without any of his sons? What would he do without Benny<\/em>?<\/p>\n

Suddenly, Ben heard what he recognized to be Mr. Whitaker\u2019s voice. The sun shone bright, making him squint. They were outside, although Ben couldn\u2019t seem to recall the steps they\u2019d taken to leave the courthouse.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026I\u2019ll pick the child up in Virginia City. We\u2019ll meet up with Mrs. Richardson back here in Carson City. I\u2019ll expect him to be in my charge promptly at ten o\u2019clock. Good day.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded dumbly then felt Adam nudge his arm, prodding him forward to the hotel.<\/p>\n

Ed cleared his throat nervously. It wasn\u2019t until this point that Ben was even aware of his lawyer\u2019s presence. Ben looked at him now, studied his face. Guilt. Helplessness. He knew he should give words to comfort Ed. Let him know that there was no blame. But right now, Ben simply couldn\u2019t speak.<\/p>\n

\u201cThanks Ed, for everything,\u201d Adam was shaking Ed\u2019s hand.<\/p>\n

Good old reliable Adam<\/em>, Ben thought once more.<\/p>\n

\u201cI wish I could have done something more\u2026to make things turn out\u2026. differently\u2026\u201d he stopped, at a loss for appropriate words. \u201cI\u2019m sorry.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam gave a forced smile. \u201cEd, you did your best. That\u2019s all we could ask. If you\u2019ll excuse us,\u201d Ben felt Adam cast a concerned glance in his direction, \u201cI think it\u2019s time we went home.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ed watched the men as they crossed the dusty street to the hotel. He was still standing in front of the courthouse when Mr. Whitaker came up to him again.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou see to it that they have the child ready at ten o\u2019clock sharp. I don\u2019t wish to be delayed.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ed removed his spectacles slowly and turned around toward Mr. Whitaker. He leaned toward him, allowing his much taller stature to tower over the weasel of a man. Their faces were closer than Mr. Whitaker felt comfortable with.<\/p>\n

\u201cShut up!\u201d Ed shouted. He looked back toward the hotel just as Adam and Ben disappeared through the door then shot one more disgusted look at Mr. Whitaker. Ed spun on his heel and walked away.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

It was late Friday evening when Ben and Adam rode into the yard of the ranch house. Neither had uttered more than a few words since the verdict had been announced earlier that day. The ride home had been a long and silent one as each used the time to sort out in his own mind what had just happened.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll put your horse up Pa,\u201d Adam offered quietly as they dismounted. Ben nodded, handing over the reins.<\/p>\n

Ben walked into the house and wearily threw his hat and gun belt onto the credenza. He turned around, surveying the great room in the soft lamp light which came from the desk of his study. Hoss and Joe were standing to greet him. He could tell from the looks on their faces that they had fallen asleep as they waited for him and Adam to return.<\/p>\n

Ben walked into the sitting area, wondering just how to tell them he\u2019d failed; that he\u2019d been unsuccessful in keeping their family together. As he rounded the settee, he noticed the small body on its cushions, snoring softly. Ben wheeled around with a questioning glance to his other two sons.<\/p>\n

\u201cSorry Pa,\u201d Little Joe said shrugging, \u201cWe told him you\u2019d be home late but\u2026he wanted to wait up for you.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben turned back around, kneeling in front of the child. As he did, he rested a hand gently on Benny\u2019s back – something he\u2019d done with all of his boys when they were little as he watched them sleep. He\u2019d always assumed he did it to reassure himself they were still breathing; that they hadn\u2019t left him. Benny stirred slightly, squinting his eyes open to reveal a thin sliver of bright blue.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, yer\u2019 home,\u201d he said sleepily. His eyes closed again in protest against the dim light.<\/p>\n

Benny sat up to put his arms around his father\u2019s neck. Ben felt his throat constrict as he gathered the boy in his arms.<\/p>\n

Hoss and Joe stood as statues by the fireplace, each wanting desperately to ask how the judge had ruled. As they watched their father slowly ascend the stairs clutching their little brother tightly, they cast each other a worried glance. They knew. His demeanor had spoken louder than any words he could have said. They were still staring up the staircase when the front door opened again.<\/p>\n

Adam let out a long sigh as he laid his things on the credenza next to his father\u2019s. He turned, startled to see his brothers standing in the shadows.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, sorry, I didn\u2019t realize anyone was still awake.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah\u2026\u201d Joe managed, his voice cracking.<\/p>\n

Hoss stood across from him with his hands in his pockets, looking down at the area rug beneath him. He brushed its decorative patterns with his toe, not wanting to look straight at his older brother. Not wanting to hear what he knew was going to be said.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe lost\u2026\u201d Joe finally said, unwilling to wait any longer for Adam to say the inevitable.<\/p>\n

Adam nodded, \u201cWe have till Monday morning.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam and Joe started at the sound of Hoss shoving the coffee table with his foot. Hoss had that look on his face that he always got when someone was pointlessly hurting another living thing. His jaw jutted out and eyebrows lowered evenly over his eyes.<\/p>\n

Adam ran a hand over his stubbly cheeks and chin. Finally, he sat. His brothers followed suit. They looked at him intensely, ready to listen.<\/p>\n

\u201cOn Monday at ten, we\u2019re to put Benny on the stage. He\u2019ll meet Genevieve and Jeanette in Carson City. Then they\u2019ll take the train together back to New Orleans,\u201d Adam stopped. Silence lingered for a moment and then Adam slowly finished, \u201cWe can\u2019t have any contact wit him for six months. Period of adjustment or something\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam had hoped his heart would feel some relief by saying the words aloud. It didn\u2019t. He wasn\u2019t sure exactly what emotion he was feeling. Anger? Despair? Helplessness? All he knew was that it felt like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. He could only imagine how much worse it was for their father.<\/p>\n

Adam was the last to retire for the evening, opting to be left alone with his thoughts as he stared into the fireplace. The evenings still held a chill, though the days were growing warm. He shivered as he climbed the stairs to his bedroom.<\/p>\n

As he headed toward his room, he could hear a soft creaking sound. It was slow, but steady.\u00a0 He followed the sound to Benny\u2019s room and peered in. Ben was holding the sleeping child, rocking back and forth slowly. Adam thought his father might be half asleep until he heard him softly murmuring. He strained to hear the almost inaudible speech. Through the creaking of the rocker, he made out a few words.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026protect my sleeping babe\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

He was praying.<\/p>\n

Adam sighed wearily. How many times had his father stayed wake from dusk till dawn praying over one or the other of his children? Too many to count, probably. He knew his father to be a pious man, one who could truly \u2018pray without ceasing.\u2019But it was times like this, when Adam could tell that his father was at his wits end, offering one final pleading petition to the Almighty.<\/p>\n

Chapter 9 \u2013 Final Days As A Family<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ben opened his eyes to find fresh morning sunlight flooding the bedroom. He felt a weight pressing into his chest. He looked down to find Benny sleeping soundly. They were still sitting in the rocking chair.<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s knees ached in protest as he stood up to carefully deposit his son on the bed. He leaned over and kissed the boy\u2019s head, breathing in his scent. Pausing momentarily, he smiled. He loved that smell. It was the smell of a child who ran barefooted along the creek banks, chasing frogs and butterflies and catching crawfish. It was the smell of a boy who\u2019d climbed more trees than could be counted and who\u2019d brought healing to a wounded old man. To Ben, it was the smell of life.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Ben could hear the clatter of utensils against fine china plates as he approached the dining room. His grown sons looked up at him upon his entrance, obviously unsure of what to say. All three squirmed uncomfortably. It was as though someone had died, and the entire house was quiet in mourning.<\/p>\n

Ben walked to his normal seat at the table and sat down, feeling very heavy. He looked around at the forlorn faces that didn\u2019t dare make eye contact.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell somebody say something<\/em>\u2026\u201d Ben said quietly.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, what are we gonna\u2019 do?\u201d Joe asked, voicing finally what Ben was sure the other two were secretly wondering.<\/p>\n

At Joe\u2019s question, Ben saw Hoss\u2019s head come up in a hopeful manner, and Ben knew what he was thinking. There had hardly been a time when the Cartwrights had gotten into a situation they couldn\u2019t charm, talk, think, or at the very least \u00a0fight <\/em>their way out of. The look in his large son\u2019s eyes held every confidence that he would come up with some sort of plan to right the situation.<\/p>\n

\u201cNothing,\u201d was the only word Ben said.<\/p>\n

His sons stared at him in surprise.<\/p>\n

\u201cNothin\u2019?\u201d Hoss asked in disbelief.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s right.\u201d Ben\u2019s speech was slow and calm. He stared at his coffee as he spoke.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, we have to do something. We can\u2019t just give up,\u201d Joe said flatly, making Ben wonder if he detected a hint of resentment in the young man\u2019s voice.<\/p>\n

\u201cJoseph, I said we will do nothing.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben looked at the three faces before him, understanding the hurt and anger that they were experiencing.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere is nothing we can<\/em> do. At least not for another six months. If we so much as take one step out of line with the judge\u2019s orders, we risk never getting him back. I don\u2019t like it any better than any of you, but that\u2019s the way it is. We will<\/em> get through this.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben moved the food on his plate around aimlessly with his fork. No one at the table had eaten much of anything.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat we need to do is make the most of the next two days. I\u2026don\u2019t plan to tell him until Sunday night\u2026I want his last memories with us to be happy ones, not filled with anger and fright. Adam, as soon as you finish your breakfast, I\u2019d like you to talk to the hands – see if they can manage things around here for a few days. I want us all to spend today and tomorrow together, as a family.\u201d<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, are we really goin\u2019 campin\u2019?\u201d Benny asked excitedly as he watched his brother load the buckboard with supplies.<\/p>\n

\u201cSure, we are!\u201d Joe answered, ruffling the boy\u2019s hair.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe don\u2019t never go campin\u2019 just to go\u2026 it\u2019s always when we\u2019re on our way somewhere or gotta do other stuff or something.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe smiled and crouched down to the boy\u2019s level.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, we got stuff to do this time too.\u201d Joe gave his brother a teasing smile.<\/p>\n

Benny looked at his Joe skeptically.<\/p>\n

\u201cReally? Like what?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLike we gotta throw you into Lake Tahoe!\u201d Joe snatched the boy up and threw him over his shoulder, giving his backside a few playful swats. \u201cNow let\u2019s go find your bedroll so we can get going!\u201d<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

\u201cDinner\u2019s almost ready boys\u2026\u201d Ben said as he leaned over the campfire to stir the pot of beans.<\/p>\n

His sons watched dejectedly, as Ben ladled out a large helping of beans onto four plates.<\/p>\n

Hoss leaned nonchalantly over to Adam, \u201cI thought you were gonna tell him you\u2019d do the cookin this trip\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam shrugged helplessly, \u201cI tried\u2026he said he wouldn\u2019t hear of it\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss sighed, turning up his nose in protest at the foul smell of the beans.<\/p>\n

\u201cHere you are boys.\u201d<\/p>\n

Four hands reluctantly reached out to take a plate of beans.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, eat hardy \u2013 I\u2019ll go to the wagon and get some more. You\u2019ll likely want more than what\u2019s in that pot.\u201d<\/p>\n

With that, he turned to leave.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, Benny, what are you doing?\u201d Adam asked, when he caught sight of the child crouched down on the ground.<\/p>\n

Benny sprang up, looking at his brothers in guilty surprise. \u201cOh, I was just\u2026 uh\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHey\u2026 where\u2019s your beans?\u201d\u00a0 Joe asked, accusation in his tone.<\/p>\n

\u201cI uh\u2026.gave\u2019em to\u2026 Chief.\u201d<\/p>\n

Three heads leaned over to see the Bassett hound happily eating Benny\u2019s plate of beans. Without so much as a second thought, three more plates were thrown in front of the dog. Chief finished the last of the beans just in time for Ben to return and find four empty plates and four smiling faces.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, see now, your old Pa can cook after all\u2026.\u201d Ben said then shoveled more beans onto their plates.<\/p>\n

Chapter 10 \u2013 Definition of a Happy Ending<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ben could feel his eyelids becoming heavy as he stared into the campfire. Adam\u2019s guitar was softly lulling him to sleep. Somewhere beyond the music, the first of the summer crickets chirped and a she-wolf howled at the moon. The air was cool but, with his coat wrapped firmly about him, Ben felt contentedly warm. He\u2019d barely nodded off when he felt a tug at his sleeve.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHm?\u201d He pulled his eyes open.<\/p>\n

Benny was standing before him, silhouetted against the firelight.<\/p>\n

\u201cWill you read the story again?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben sat up, blinking away his sleepiness.<\/p>\n

\u201cAlright,\u201d he smiled, taking the Bible Benny was presenting to him. \u201cNow let\u2019s see here\u2026\u201d Ben said, his voice still holding a hint of sleepiness. He fanned through the pages of the sacred book. \u201cWhat story shall we read\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPa,\u201d Benny crossed his arms as he addressed his father, \u201cYou know which one!\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben gave the boy a wink. \u201cAlright\u2026 Joseph it is.\u201d<\/p>\n

A soft chuckle escaped, as he watched his small son hurry across the campsite to settle himself against a fallen log with his brothers. Ben looked from face to face. Even in the shadows of the evening, they were a beautiful sight to him. Ben lost himself in the scene momentarily, as he watched his sons. Adam laid his guitar aside and pulled Benny onto his cross-legged lap. Benny settled himself back against his oldest brother\u2019s chest, cocooning himself into the warmth of Adam\u2019s open jacket. Next to them, Hoss was pulling a handful of jerky out of a nearby saddlebag. Leaning over, he offered some to Joe. Hoss made a comment, lost to Ben\u2019s ears, that made the other three laugh quietly. Ben\u2019s smile deepened as he looked across the campfire at his whole world.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHm? Oh\u2026\u201d Ben shook the thoughts from his head. Turning his attention back to the Bible in his hands, he quickly fluttered through the pages to the end of Genesis.<\/p>\n

Clearing his throat, he began to read. \u201c\u2018Joseph, a young man of seventeen, was tending the flocks with his brothers\u2026and he brought back to his father a bad report about them\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Pa,\u201d Benny interrupted, \u201cNot there \u2013 start at the beginning, where Joseph gets his name.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben pursed his lips and raised a rather bushy eyebrow at the boy, then flipped backwards a few pages.<\/p>\n

\u201cUh\u2026. let\u2019s see\u2026 oh here \u2013 \u2018And Rachel gave birth to a son and said, \u2018God has taken away my disgrace.\u2019 She named him Joseph, saying, \u2018May the Lord add to me another.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOkay, now read about his coat of many colors.\u201d Benny spoke up again.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow\u2026just who\u2019s telling this story \u2013 you or me?\u201d Ben asked teasingly and turned a few more pages.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2018Now Israel loved Joseph more than any of his other sons, because he had been born to him in his old age; and he made a richly ornamented robe for him\u2026\u201d Ben looked up between verses at his son, who was listening intently. It never ceased to amaze him how the boy could listen to the same story night after night and never get tired of it. A mischievous grin spread across his face as he continued. \u201c\u2026and they all lived happily ever after. The End.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben could hardly contain himself when the boy bounded out of Adam\u2019s lap in protest.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa! That ain\u2019t how it goes! You forgot Joseph\u2019s dream, and his brothers selling him to slavery, and him goin\u2019 to prison and telling the Pharaoh\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, now Benny,\u201d Hoss interjected with a grin, \u201cPa wasn\u2019t too far off. After all that bad stuff happened, Joseph and his family really did wind up living \u2018happily ever after,\u2019 right?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny wheeled around, looking incredulously at his brother.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut Hoss, ya\u2019 can\u2019t have a happy endin\u2019 if there weren\u2019t nothin\u2019 ever wrong! \u2013 \u2018Member? Joseph goes through all\u2019a that bad stuff and then tells his brothers that God used all\u2019a the bad things they done to\u2019im to make good things happen. At the end, all\u2019a that bad stuff helped save everyone from the fa- fa-\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFamine,\u201d Adam offered, biting off a bit of jerky.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, that,\u201d Benny said quickly, then continued, \u201cYa can\u2019t leave out the bad stuff, or the end don\u2019t make no sense!\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben smiled and threw his hands up in mock resignation. \u201cOkay, then. We\u2019ll read it the right way\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny sat himself down next to his father, and Ben nearly laughed out loud. It seemed Benny was going to make sure that the story was read correctly.<\/p>\n

Ben read, stopping every now and again to his son\u2019s command of, \u201cwait\u2026read that part again.\u201d\u00a0 Ben would nod and patiently reread the passage, slowing down for the parts he knew Benny liked to recite with him. It was late in the evening when the story finally came to a close.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2018Then Joseph said to his brothers\u2026\u2019do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you\u2026 So then, it was not you who sent me here, but God\u2026\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben cast a quick glance toward his youngest. Benny was fast asleep, his head resting on Ben\u2019s lap.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026And I think,\u201d he said, giving the men across from him a wink, \u201cwe can end it there.\u201d<\/p>\n

Chapter 11 \u2013 Trying To Explain<\/strong><\/p>\n

All too soon, it seemed, Sunday afternoon had arrived, and it was time to head back to the house. The camping trip had been a bittersweet one for the men, in light of the lingering knowledge of what was to come. In spite of their sorrow, they had hope in the fact that Benny would take with him the memory of a family who loved him dearly.<\/p>\n

Sunday night\u2019s dinner felt like a slow form of torture as each man contemplated how Benny might react to the news. They tried, for Benny\u2019s sake, to keep the conversation as lighthearted as possible. When the meal was finished, the five retired to the great room as they always did.<\/p>\n

Benny sat on the hearth, a wooden toy soldier in each hand. The fire crackled behind him and the stones beneath him warmed his backside. He raised a soldier to inspect its detail more closely.\u00a0 Joe had sure done a good job on them. Benny smiled with pride. Tomorrow he\u2019d take them to show Jimmy Roberts. That Jimmy always thought he had the best toys, just because his father was the blacksmith. Well<\/em>, he resolved, we\u2019ll see what Jimmy thinks about these!<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, Pa? \u2013 I mean, yessir?\u201d Benny replied, still contemplating his new toys and what Jimmy\u2019s reaction to them might be.<\/p>\n

\u201cCome over here please.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny looked up curiously at his father, wondering if he was in trouble. Laying his toys down, he stood and slowly made his way over to the familiar chair his father was occupying.<\/p>\n

\u201cYessir?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny watched his father closely. Something was wrong. Benny\u2019s palms began to sweat. Pa had that look on his face that he always got right before they would take a \u201ctrip to the barn.\u201d Benny could feel his brothers behind him, staring.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny, I need to talk to you about something.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOkay Pa,\u201d Benny felt a lump in his throat, as though he might cry. He hadn\u2019t meant to do anything bad \u2013 he couldn\u2019t even think of what he might be in trouble for. He hoped his father wouldn\u2019t think he had intentionally done anything wrong.<\/p>\n

\u201cYour mother\u2026she\u2026she\u2019s\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny gave a relieved exhale. It appeared he wasn\u2019t in trouble after all.<\/p>\n

\u201cDead. I know,\u201d Benny said matter-of-factly.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know that she\u2019s dead,\u201d his face was serious, but not emotional at all.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhere did you hear that?\u201d His father seemed shocked at his knowledge of the situation.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, ain\u2019t all\u2019a our mother\u2019s dead?\u201d He asked, looking around the room at his brothers. His gaze held theirs momentarily as he noted their looks of deep concern.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo\u2026no, Benny, your mother is still alive.\u201d His father\u2019s face seemed to blush slightly.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, then why ain\u2019t she here?\u201d<\/p>\n

There was silence for a moment, a very uncomfortable silence. Benny looked around the room again at his family. He felt his father\u2019s large hands lifting him up to his lap.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell\u2026she left some time ago\u2026we\u2019re not\u2026\u201d\u00a0 he sighed in apparent frustration. \u201c\u2026we\u2019re not married anymore.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny\u2019s eyes were fixed on his father\u2019s face. He didn\u2019t say anything, just waited for Ben to continue.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen we\u2026divorced\u2026your mother moved back to New Orleans and sent you back here to live with us.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny had no idea what \u201cdivorce\u201d meant but he didn\u2019t say so.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny, your mother\u2026wants you to come live with her now\u2026That\u2019s why Adam and I were in Carson City last week.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny thought for a moment, contemplating this mysterious new mother, then replied, \u201cNah\u2026 I\u2019ll just stay here.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, Benny that\u2019s just it, when we went to Carson City we had to talk with the judge and he decided that you should go live with her, instead of here\u2026with us.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny could feel everyone\u2019s eye upon him. Slowly, realization began to dawn.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy does he have anything ta\u2019 say \u2018bout it? What does he know \u2018bout anything?\u201d Benny had lost the typical sweet innocence in his voice and his words held an edge that warned of an approaching display of emotion.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, son, he\u2019s a judge<\/em>. We have to do what he says\u2026that\u2019s just the way it is.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny slid from his father\u2019s lap. His small booted feet landed with an echo on the wooden floor.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t care who<\/em> he is! He can\u2019t make me leave! I don\u2019t wanna\u2019 go. You<\/em> can\u2019t make me either!\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny\u2019s words shocked even himself as much as they appeared to shock his father. He braced himself, knowing a trip to the barn would now indeed be in order.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenjamin!\u201d\u00a0 His father had hardly gotten the word out when his face relaxed and he began again, more calmly. \u201cBenny, I understand how you feel. I can\u2019t bear the thought of you leaving me, but that\u2019s just the way it has to be.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny looked squarely into his father\u2019s face and spoke in open defiance.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy didn\u2019t you do somethin\u2019? You could have told\u2019im not to send me away!\u201d Benny\u2019s eyes burned with unshed tears.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny,\u201d Hoss stood up, a powerful presence looming over the boy, \u201cDon\u2019t you talk like that – It ain\u2019t like Pa didn\u2019t try.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny stared at Hoss, feeling completely betrayed by his brother\u2019s defense of their father. Then, setting his jaw stubbornly, he gave the coffee table a swift kick and ran to the front door.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny!\u201d Hoss\u2019s voice froze the child in his tracks. He didn\u2019t dare turn around.<\/p>\n

Somewhere behind him he could hear a soft creaking of leather and knew his father had stood up.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny\u2026 Please believe me. I tried.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny closed his eyes at his father\u2019s words as warm tears streamed down his cheeks.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou didn\u2019t try hard enough,\u201d he muttered quietly, and left.<\/p>\n

Chapter 12 \u2013 It\u2019s Like Joseph<\/strong><\/p>\n

The great room was deafeningly quiet as they waited. None of the men were exactly sure what they were waiting for, but still they waited.<\/p>\n

At last Joe stood and turned to go to the door, but Ben stayed him with a raise of his hand.<\/p>\n

\u201cGive him a few minutes. He won\u2019t go far.\u201d Ben knew his small son well enough to know he was terrified of the dark and would probably choose to go to the barn where he could still see the light of the house.<\/p>\n

Joe looked at his father skeptically then resigned himself to wait some more.\u00a0 Hoss cast a despondent glance in Adam\u2019s direction, as though to ask if there was anything any of them could do. Adam shook his head sadly. Several more minutes passed as they all continued to silently wait.<\/p>\n

Finally, Ben stood with a weary sigh. He walked solemnly to the door, grabbed his coat off the peg and left.<\/p>\n

The three continued to stare at the door for a few moments after he\u2019d gone. At last, Joe stood up and walked to the staircase.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhere are you going?\u201d Adam asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhether Benny wants to leave or not, he has to,\u201d Joe said evenly, \u201cI\u2019d rather not put Pa through the torture of having to pack his things.\u201d<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026Benny, please try to understand\u2026I did everything I could\u2026if I go against that judge now, he may take you away from me forever. You don\u2019t want that, do you?\u201d Benny was laying face down in a pile of hay, crying into his shirtsleeve. Ben was rubbing his back in an effort to calm him.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo\u2026\u201d Benny\u2019s answer was muffled.<\/p>\n

\u201cAlright\u2026 come here now,\u201d he pulled his son close. Benny buried his face in his father\u2019s chest. His body shook with each sob.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere, there\u2026it won\u2019t be so bad,\u201d he began to rock the child back and forth. \u201cYou know\u2026 your mother is very pretty. You have her blue eyes. I think you\u2019ll really like her.\u201d Whatever Ben\u2019s opinion of his ex-wife, he did not want to spoil the boy\u2019s naturally kind heart and make him hate her before they ever met.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut it won\u2019t be the same. I won\u2019t have you, an\u2019 Adam an\u2019 Joe an\u2019 Hoss\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAh, but you know what?\u201d Ben turned the boy around so he could see his face. \u201cDo you see that?\u201d He pointed out the barn window to a brilliant display of stars against a black sky \u201cWhenever you are lonely, you can look up at those stars and know they\u2019re also shining down here on the Ponderosa and that\u2019s where I\u2019ll be. Thinking of you.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny watched the star-speckled sky as he leaned his head against his father\u2019s chest. His sobs had given way to little whimpers, but warm tears continued to stream silently down his cheeks.<\/p>\n

Several minutes passed in silence. Ben became absorbed in his own thoughts as he continued to rock back and forth. Looking around the barn, dimly lit by the light of a full moon, his mind went back to a month prior when life was as it should be. He\u2019d sat right over there and watched his sons give in to their more playful sides. That had been before everything went wrong.<\/p>\n

Benny\u2019s voice startled him out of his thoughts.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s like Joseph\u2026\u201d Benny said in the darkness. \u201c\u2026like in the story\u2026takin\u2019 Joseph away from his home\u2026to Egypt.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben didn\u2019t respond, but just looked at his son. Moonlight glimmered off Benny\u2019s wet cheeks. His eyes were still gazing out the barn window to the vast starry sky.<\/p>\n

\u201cGuess now I know how he felt,\u201d Benny paused a moment then went on, \u201cWill God be with me too? He was with Joseph, that\u2019s what the Bible says\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course he\u2019ll be with you\u2026and keep you safe.\u201d Ben\u2019s heart filled with pride, though he felt a bit ashamed. As the father, it was his duty to point his children to God in times of crisis, not the other way around.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019d settle to stay plain old Benjamin<\/em> \u2013 at least he got to stay at home with his family!\u201d The two chuckled softly.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow wait a minute, you\u2019re Benjamin Joseph<\/em> \u2013 I wonder what kind of spin that puts on the story!\u201d Ben looked down playfully at his son as he spoke. They giggled once more.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut one thing I believe, Benny,\u201d he turned his son to face him, \u201cJust like you said last night \u2013 about the story of Joseph \u2013 the happy ending doesn\u2019t make sense without the bad things. There is purpose in this, even if we don\u2019t know what it is yet.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny nodded and Ben pulled him close again. The two sat there for a long while, both finding comfort in each other\u2019s presence. Finally, Ben felt the soft vibration of Benny snoring.<\/p>\n

Chapter 13 \u2013 \u201cPrecious Mem\u2019ries, How They Linger\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

It was nearly ten o\u2019clock when Ben carried his son from the barn back to the house. Inside, Hoss and Joe were trying to concentrate on a game of checkers to pass the time, while Adam sat in his blue chair writing in his journal. They all looked up upon their father\u2019s entrance, relieved to see that he\u2019d had been able to calm their brother.<\/p>\n

Ben crossed the room, holding a sleeping Benny as dead weight in his arms. He rounded the settee and shifted the boy to one arm then the other so he could remove his coat. He sat, laying his son on the cushions next to him and draped the garment over the small body. He ran a weathered hand over the boy\u2019s hair, smoothing it and brushing some wayward locks out of his face. Benny stirred at the touch, adjusting his position slightly so his head could rest on his father\u2019s lap, then fell back asleep.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe still clenches them fists when he sleeps \u2013 like he done when he was just a lil\u2019 fella, don\u2019t he?\u201d Hoss said, watching his brother. Benny lay on his side, a tightly balled fist protruding from underneath the corduroy coat that covered him.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, what else can he do?\u201d Joe said softly, casting a teasing glance in his older brother\u2019s direction. \u201cAdam never would let him suck his thumb.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam looked up coolly from his journal, \u201cYes, and look at those teeth. Perfectly straight.\u201d<\/p>\n

The tension in the room seemed to ease as serious faces gave way to smiles, weak though they were.<\/p>\n

Hoss continued staring at his brother. \u201cHe was such a little thing when he come here\u2026I thought fer shore\u2019 one of us\u2019d break\u2019im.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s smile deepened as he raised a playful eyebrow. \u201cIf I remember correctly, you would stay awake all night watching him – just to make sure he was still breathing.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYah, well, that only lasted a week, then Hoss started missing his beauty sleep.\u201d Joe leaned over the checkerboard to give Hoss\u2019s shoulder a teasing nudge. \u201cGuess you finally figured that baby would keep breathing whether you were there to watch him or not.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss grinned bashfully. It was true. He remembered wondering how anyone could leave a little thing like that in a cradle all by himself and expect him to still be there in the morning. He guessed he was afraid the baby would simply vanish into thin air, but if he kept Benny in his sights all the time, then no harm could possibly come to him.<\/p>\n

\u201cYah, I guess I didn\u2019t know much \u2018bout babies, did I?\u201d Hoss conceded.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, you certainly knew more than him<\/em>.\u201d Adam pointed a finger at Joe.<\/p>\n

\u201cDo you remember what happened the night Tom and Annie brought him to us?\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss let out a sudden burst of laughter then quickly tried to muffle the sounds in his hands so as not to wake Benny.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa? I couldn\u2019t find Little Joe\u2019s old cradle anywhere in the barn,\u201d Adam said as he closed the door against the icy wind.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cI told you, it\u2019s in an old crate up in the loft,\u201d Ben was bouncing as he walked in vain effort to calm the wailing baby.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cI know, but it\u2019s not there.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s face fell into an annoyed frown. The baby had to sleep somewhere tonight \u2013 if they managed to get him to sleep at all. It was very difficult to concentrate on anything with the shock of the newest Cartwright addition still fresh in their minds. And the crying! Ben honestly couldn\u2019t remember his other boys crying this loudly.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cHe shore do have a powerful set \u2018o lungs on\u2019im don\u2019t he?\u201d Hoss scratched his head. He had a sneaking suspicion that none of them would ever sleep again.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cOh, I remember where it is,\u201d Ben piped up again, \u201cI may need you and Hoss to help me move some crates though. I think we moved it to the storeroom, remember?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cOh yeah\u2026\u201d Adam nodded in vague recollection.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cHere Joe, you hold\u2026uh\u2026him\u2026\u201d he didn\u2019t know what to call the child, as he still had no name.\u201cWhat? I don\u2019t know how ta\u2019 hold no baby!\u201d Joe\u2019s eyes pleaded with Ben not to make him take the child.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cHe won\u2019t bite, Joe. Just put his head there in the crook of your arm and put your other hand under him like that.\u201d Ben shuffled the bundle into Joe\u2019s arms. \u201cSee, it\u2019s not so hard.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

With that the three men headed for the door. Suddenly, their ears met with a sound they\u2019d not heard for about three hours: silence. They stopped mid stride, then slowly turned in unison.<\/em><\/p>\n

Joe felt their stares and shrugged as he glanced from face to face, \u201cWhat?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s mouth was open as he pointed to the baby. \u201cIt\u2026it\u2026 it stopped crying\u2026\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Joe looked down at the baby. \u201cHmm\u2026what d\u2019ya know?\u00a0 He did, didn\u2019t he?\u201d Joe straightened his back, pushing out a rather concave adolescent chest and strutted confidently over to his father and brothers. \u201cWell, ya\u2019 know, it just takes the right kinda\u2019 person!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Ben gave Joe an annoyed glance before turning once again to leave.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cUh-oh\u2026Pa? I think there\u2019s a problem\u2026\u201d Joe\u2019s confidence had suddenly diminished and his face took on a rather pale glow.The three men rushed over to inspect the child. He seemed fine. He was cooing quietly as he sucked on a fist. They looked at Joe questioningly. Joe raised the baby a bit to reveal a large wet spot on his shirtfront.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cHe leaks.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cLittle brother, I can still see the look on yer face!\u201d Hoss howled.<\/p>\n

Joe frowned, \u201cWell how was I supposed to know anything about babies?\u201d<\/p>\n

A moment later, Joe\u2019s frown gave way t a mischievous grin.<\/p>\n

\u201cYa\u2019 know what I remember, Hoss? Benny\u2019s first word\u2026 Now Hoss, why don\u2019t you refresh everyone else\u2019s memory. What was his first word?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDad\u2019burn you Joe!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy, yes \u2013 I do believe that was<\/em> it!\u201d Joe ducked to evade the checker piece that Hoss sent flying in his direction.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat are you talking about?\u201d Ben asked, raising an eyebrow, \u201cBenny learned his first word from Annie O\u2019Toole, remember? She\u2019d been watching him for us during the spring round up. When we came back, she was ranting about that fool, Mr. Spain again. Before long we heard this tiny voice repeat\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

The whole family resounded in one accord, \u201cSniba\u2019blot.\u201d<\/p>\n

They laughed at the memory. Then Joe spoke up again, not wanting to let Hoss off the hook that easily.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, well that\u2019s the first word you<\/em> heard him say, Pa. Benny actually learned another word before that\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss, what\u2019cha doin\u2019 there?\u201d Joe asked curiously as he came into the house.<\/em><\/p>\n

Hoss nearly jumped at the sound of Joe\u2019s voice. He was crouched down holding Benny with one hand and covering the toddler\u2019s mouth with the other. He didn\u2019t dare turn around to look at Joe.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cUh\u2026nuthin\u2019\u2026\u201d Hoss\u2019 eyes were wide with guilt, though he tried to sound as casual as possible.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cCome on, what\u2019re you doin\u2019 there?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Hoss rolled his eyes in defeat and turned, keeping his one hand firmly on Benny\u2019s mouth. Joe frowned, still not understanding.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, he won\u2019t stop sayin\u2019 it!\u201d Hoss said in a panic.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cStop saying what?\u201d Joe asked, \u201cWhat are you talkin\u2019 about?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Hoss sighed and removed his hand from Benny\u2019s mouth. A few moments later an innocent voice came through in perfect clarity.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cDad\u2019buwn it.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

An astonished Joe pointed at the child, \u201cW-w-what\u2019d he just say?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cDad\u2019buwn it,\u201d the voice said again.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cH-h-hoss\u2026you can\u2019t let Pa hear that! He\u2019ll skin you alive!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cI know\u2026Why couldn\u2019t he just say somethin\u2019 normal, like \u2018da-da\u2019?\u201d Hoss lamented, \u201cOh, Dad\u2019burnit!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cDad\u2019buwn it.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, what\u2019d you teach him that for anyway?\u201d Joe asked in frustration, now feeling as an accomplice.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cDad\u2019bur \u2026\u201d Hoss caught himself with a wince and started again, \u201cI didn\u2019t teach him nuthin\u2019! I was hammerin\u2019 that nail into the wall and I hit my finger. Guess I must\u2019a said that after I done it\u2026Joe we gotta do somethin\u2019!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

The room was filled with laughter as Joe told, in great detail, the secret they\u2019d kept for the previous five years. Hoss, though still embarrassed, resigned himself to a deep chuckle.<\/p>\n

\u201cI warned you about that Hoss,\u201d Adam said between bouts of laughter, \u201cI knew he was gonna start talking soon.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, if I recall,\u201d Ben said, addressing Adam\u2019s told-you-so manner, \u201cSomebody in this room misplaced<\/em> his beloved youngest brother when he was just eight months old!\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam quickly reopened his journal in an attempt to ignore the story that he knew was forthcoming.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou were working on your drawings for those new line shacks we were going to build when I had to go tend to a matter in Virginia City\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cKeep an eye on Benny for me please,\u201d Ben pointed to the baby playing quietly atop a soft blanket on the floor.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cUh-huh,\u201d Adam\u2019s head was still buried in his work.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, I\u2019m serious. You\u2019ve got to watch him. He\u2019s crawling now \u2013 he\u2019ll be gone before you\u2026\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cAlright, Pa \u2013 I said I\u2019d watch him,\u201d Adam said flatly in irritation.<\/em><\/p>\n

Ben cast one more concerned glance at the baby then left the house. As he untied his horse from the hitching post, he remembered the lumber contracts on the desk. He\u2019d need those. He re-tied the horse and walked back into the house. Upon entering, found his youngest crawling happily through the dining room, on his way to investigate the kitchen.Ben looked around. Adam was nowhere in sight. Ben rolled his eyes and picked up the child. He heard the familiar voice humming somewhere upstairs. Ben scowled, muttering something about \u201c\u2018watching him\u2019 indeed.\u201d Retrieving the needed documents from the desk, he left the house in a huff, baby and all.Later that day, Ben returned, once again, to an empty house. He harrumphed and crossed the room to his study. He settled the baby on the floor beside him with a blanket and a toy. He had barely begun looking over his newly revised contracts when the front door swung open, followed in short order by his eldest son running frantically in.Ben leaned forward smugly, elbows resting on the desk.\u201cWhat\u2019s the matter son?\u201d\u201cPa!\u201d Adam spun around on his heel, obviously startled by his father\u2019s presence.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cSomething wrong?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cUh\u2026well\u2026I kinda\u2019 misplaced something\u2026\u201d Adam said, looking a little ill.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cOh really? And what did you misplace?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cWell\u2026uh\u2026\u201d Adam slumped his shoulders in defeat, \u201c\u2026the baby\u2026I just went upstairs for a minute, and when I came down, he was gone\u2026 I\u2019ve looked everywhere.\u201dBen felt a wave of guilt wash over him as he watched his son in this panicked state, but the feeling soon passed. With a dark glare, Ben leaned over to pick up Benny from the floor next to him. The infant gurgled happily at the familiar sight of his brother.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cPa \u2026\u201d was all Adam could say as he tried to piece together what had just happened.<\/em><\/p>\n

Ben stood slowly then rounded the desk. He handed the child to Adam then pointed an accusatory finger at him.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cThe next time I tell you to keep an eye on him, perhaps you should consider keeping two eyes on him!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t see how that\u2019s funny,\u201d Adam said dryly in response to his brothers\u2019 riotous laughter.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, if you were to keep two<\/em> eyes on it, you might see it\u2019s pretty darn funny!\u201d Joe howled.<\/p>\n

The men sat and talked of precious memories until late in the evening. Eventually the conversation died off and they lost themselves in their own thoughts. One by one, each finally allowed their exhausted bodies and weary minds to succumb to sleep.<\/p>\n

In the early hours of the morning, Hop Sing made his way to the kitchen to prepare the morning meal. His eye caught a glow emanating from the main part of the house.\u00a0 Curious, he went to investigate. His heart broke when he saw the various slumbering bodies lying all over the great room.<\/p>\n

He looked at the clock. Three o\u2019clock. They still had two hours to sleep. Perhaps he could coax them to sleep a little longer this morning, since the day would be such a difficult one. He moved to the credenza and opened one of its doors. Pulling some blankets out, he thought of the last time he\u2019d witnessed this very same scene. It had been more than five years prior. The night Benny had come to them. None of them knew exactly what to do with the baby and each had taken their turn at trying to get the child to go to sleep. When at last they succeeded, the men were so tired they couldn\u2019t even climb the steps to their beds. They just made themselves comfortable downstairs. And that\u2019s exactly where Hop Sing had found them the next morning.<\/p>\n

Smiling at the memory, he covered each of the slumbering bodies with a blanket then blew out the lamp in the corner. He cast one more glance at the family he loved. This is how he would always remember them: a complete<\/em> family. Sadness filled his heart as he quietly left the room. Today, he would make a special breakfast.<\/p>\n

Chapter 14 \u2013 Saying Goodbye<\/strong><\/p>\n

The day was already shaping up to be a warm one as the Cartwright family entered Virginia City in their buckboard. The main street bustled with people going about their business. Adam shifted uncomfortably at the glances from passers-by. He sighed inwardly and mentally cursed Genevieve and her lawyer for the umpteenth time. He had tried to talk Mr. Whitaker into allowing them to take Benny to Carson City to meet up with Genevieve. In his mind, Carson City would be the lesser of the two evils. Both towns were well acquainted with their family, but they weren\u2019t as likely to be the butt of town gossip there as they were here in Virginia City. Alas, Mr. Whitaker would have none of it, insisting that his arrangement was \u201cbetter for the child.\u201d\u00a0 Adam sighed again and resigned himself to the knowledge that their final moments as a family would have to be shared amid the murmurs of the citizens of Virginia City.<\/p>\n

As the wagon came to a halt, the small gathering of people milling around the stagecoach station was hard miss. Adam pursed his lips and gave a heavy sigh. Did they have no subtlety? No manners? No compassion? He recognized a few of the faces that lingered about. Some probably came to offer support; others came out of idle curiosity; and others still, came to watch what they perceived as the \u2018fall of the mighty Cartwrights.\u2019 Pushing the thought from his mind, Adam exited the buckboard.<\/p>\n

He rounded the back of the wagon to retrieve Benny\u2019s bags. He looked across the wagon at his family. Hoss and Joe were climbing down. He could hear them mumble something about \u201cnosey neighbors\u201d and \u201cdidn\u2019t they have anything better to do.\u201d Opposite them, their father stood next to the buckboard. He held his hat in one hand, while the other dabbed at a bit of sweat on his brow with a handkerchief. Benny sat alone atop the wagon, feet dangling far above the floorboard. He looks so small<\/em>, Adam thought.<\/p>\n

\u201cAlright, down you come,\u201d His father was saying as he held his arms out to lift Benny from the wagon.<\/p>\n

Adam looked up at the sun, squinting. It looked like it was going to be a hot day for traveling. He gathered the baggage and joined his family on the boardwalk.<\/p>\n

The five made their way over to the waiting stagecoach. Mr. Whitaker was standing in front of it, rattling off orders to the driver. As they neared, Mr. Whitaker looked at his pocket watch, and gave them a stern look.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, it\u2019s about time,\u201d he huffed, \u201cthe stage leaves in five minutes.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam held his tongue, remembering his father\u2019s admonition to not cause a scene. He cast a glance toward Ben, who shook his head as if to say it was not an argument worth pursuing.<\/p>\n

Mr. Whitaker clucked his tongue in annoyance then turned his attention back to the driver.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, don\u2019t just stand there, load his things!\u201d<\/p>\n

The driver harrumphed at the command but hopped down from the stage to take the bags from Adam.<\/p>\n

The family stood side by side for a moment as they stared at the vehicle that would separate them.<\/p>\n

\u201cHowdy Ben, boys,\u201d Sheriff Coffee\u2019s voice came from behind them.<\/p>\n

\u201cHowdy Roy\u2026Thanks for coming\u2026\u201d Ben said, turning to his good friend to offer an appreciative nod.<\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Cartwright,\u201d Whitaker interrupted, \u201cWe really must be leaving.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben wheeled around to face the man, scowling. He opened his mouth to speak, but Adam stopped him with a hand to his arm. He knew how mad his father was \u2013 how mad they all were – and he secretly wondered if Mr. Whitaker had any idea how lucky he was that the sheriff was right behind them.<\/p>\n

\u201cCain\u2019t leave without a driver,\u201d the driver said flatly said as he jumped down from the stage, \u201cas it turns out\u2026 the stage has been delayed.\u201d\u00a0 The man tipped his hat at Mr. Whitaker in mock-politeness then walked over to Ben. Placing a hand on his shoulder he whispered quietly, \u201cI heard \u2018bout what happened\u2026I\u2019m real sorry\u2026I can give you maybe ten more minutes\u2026you say g\u2019bye to yer boy\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThanks\u2026\u201d Ben\u2019s voice was almost inaudible.<\/p>\n

Adam nodded his thanks to the driver as he passed, wondering if the man would ever know how much his sympathy was appreciated. He was startled out of his thoughts by the sound of Hoss clearing his throat uncomfortably.<\/p>\n

\u201cGuess I\u2019ll go first\u2026\u201d Hoss knelt, pulling his youngest brother in front of him. \u201cBenny, I just don\u2019t rightly remember life before you come\u2026I don\u2019t even wanna think of what it\u2019s gonna be like when you leave\u2026it\u2026it just won\u2019t be the same\u2026I love you,\u201d he pulled the boy into a firm embrace for a moment then released him, wiping at his nose with his shirtsleeve.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, I got somethin\u2019 fer ya,\u201d Hoss reached into his back pocket. Smiling, he presented a leather star. On its front the word \u201cSheriff\u201d had been decoratively burned into the surface of the hide.<\/p>\n

\u201cEvery sheriff needs a badge, I reckon.\u201d Hoss secured the badge to Benny\u2019s shirt pocket.<\/p>\n

Benny looked down, running his fingers over the lettering. A few tears trickled their way down the boy\u2019s cheeks.<\/p>\n

\u201cThanks, Hoss. Loves ya,\u201d he muttered, his chin quivering just a bit.<\/p>\n

Hoss ruffled the child\u2019s hair. Coming up from his knees, he stepped aside to allow the others their goodbyes.<\/p>\n

Joe retrieved a package wrapped in burlap and twine from the back of the wagon and then moved to Benny, kneeling as Hoss had done.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s a funny thing ya know, I\u2019d never been a big brother till you came along\u2026 I haven\u2019t had as much practice at it as Adam and Hoss\u2026\u201d\u00a0 Joe\u2019s eyes fell to the ground sadly. \u201cI hope I did a good job\u2026 Here, Adam and I made this for you.\u201d<\/p>\n

He handed Benny the package. As tears streamed silently down the boy\u2019s face, he pulled at the string and unwrapped the gift. It was a tiny leather gun belt with a wooden toy gun in the holster. The eyes that looked back at Joe told him that, in spite of the circumstance, the child was in awe of the magnificent present.<\/p>\n

\u201cI carved the gun myself. Smell it \u2013 it\u2019s real Ponderosa Pine\u2026from that old tree we cut down in the East Meadow last month.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny raised the gun to his nose and inhaled deeply. It had the faint smell of vanilla.<\/p>\n

\u201cSmells like home\u2026\u201d he remarked quietly.<\/p>\n

Joe nodded and pulled his brother close, \u201cI love you, Benny,\u201d was all he could manage.<\/p>\n

\u201cLoves ya too,\u201d the sweet voice was muffled by the arms that encircled him. At length, Joe released Benny. Planting a final kiss on the mound of black curls, he moved to go stand next to Hoss.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey little man,\u201d Adam gave a weak smile as he leaned over to ruffle the boy\u2019s hair. \u201cLet me show you something,\u201d he took the gun belt from Benny, showing him the inside of the belt. He pointed to some words burned into the leather. \u201cSee this here? That says, \u2018Pa, Adam, Hoss, Joe and Benny \u2013 Together Always.\u2019\u201d He tapped on the boy\u2019s chest, \u201cThis is where we\u2019ll be together.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny\u2019s eyes stayed fixed on the words. His chin quivered as fresh tears came. \u201cYa\u2019ll won\u2019t forget me?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHey now,\u201d Adam tilted his brother\u2019s chin up to look at his face, \u201cWe\u2019re brothers. That means we take care of each other and love each other\u2026and never ever forget, ya hear?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny nodded then reached up to wrap his arms tightly around Adam\u2019s waist.<\/p>\n

\u201cLoves ya Adam.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI love you too.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny slowly pushed away from Adam and turned around to face his father. As soon as he saw Ben\u2019s tear-streaked face, he rushed toward him with open arms. Ben scooped his youngest up into a warm embrace.<\/p>\n

\u201cI love you, boy\u2026you hear me?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben couldn\u2019t distinguish an answer through the sobs that shook Benny\u2019s small frame. Ben held his son close, not caring who might be watching \u2013 who might be talking about them. How long would it be before he could hold Benny in his arms like this again? He wanted to memorize this feeling, to remember it for all time. Caught up in his own grief, Ben did not notice the return of the driver.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, it\u2019s about time,\u201d Mr. Whitaker addressed the driver, \u201cAll right, Mr. Cartwright, we\u2019ve wasted enough time with this. It\u2019s time to go.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded and leaned over to place his son on the ground. As he did, Benny\u2019s legs grabbed him at the waist, refusing to be put down.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny, it\u2019s time to go now, it\u2019ll be alright\u2026\u201d Ben said, patting the boy\u2019s back.<\/p>\n

Slowly, Benny began to loosen his grip, trusting his father\u2019s words.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, now really\u2026this is quite enough already.\u201d Mr. Whitaker rolled his eyes in exasperation and reached out to pull the boy away from his father.<\/p>\n

Suddenly, Ben felt his son\u2019s body become tense and his breathing was rapid as he gripped at Ben\u2019s neck. Mr. Whitaker tried again. This time, Ben\u2019s ear felt a sharp pain coinciding with the bloodcurdling scream that came from the boy.<\/p>\n

In one fluid motion, Joe moved forward and grabbed the man by the collar, pressing him firmly against the stagecoach door. Adam quickly stepped behind Joe, gripping his brother\u2019s shoulder. Joe showed no sign of relenting, but just stared with intensity into Whitaker\u2019s face.<\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t ever touch him again.\u201d Joe\u2019s tone was even, though his eyes held every promise that he had no interest in preserving the life that stood before him.<\/p>\n

Adam tugged on the shoulder again, and Joe released his grip on the man. Behind them Benny was now completely hysterical.<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss!\u201d Ben shouted, wincing at the shrieks that pierced his ears.<\/p>\n

Hoss nodded and gently, but firmly pulled the wailing Benny from his father and pressed the child against his broad chest. Benny continued to kick and scream. Hoss quickly pinned the boy\u2019s arms and legs with his strong arms.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s gonna be sick\u2026\u201d Ben warned.<\/p>\n

Hoss nodded, noting the rather pale complexion his brother had taken on.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll be right back,\u201d he said then walked off in the direction of the livery stable.<\/p>\n

\u201cI demand to know where you\u2019re taking that boy!\u201d Whitaker shouted after Hoss, then turned his attention to the other men standing about. \u201cHe can\u2019t do that! That\u2019s kidnapping!\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss ignored Mr. Whitaker\u2019s ranting and continued walking.<\/p>\n

Once inside the livery stable, Hoss set Benny down on a bail of hay.<\/p>\n

\u201cAll right, put yer head between yer knees.\u201d Hoss pushed the boy\u2019s head down in an effort to keep him from passing out. After a moment or two, Benny\u2019s breathing slowed, though he was still crying. When Hoss felt sure that Benny was not going to get sick, he sat down and pulled the boy onto his lap, rocking him for a few minutes. At last, his crying stopped, with the exception of an occasional sniffle or whimper.<\/p>\n

\u201cBoy, you gotta stop doin\u2019 that,\u201d Hoss said as he reached into his back pocket to retrieve a handkerchief. Unfolding it, he wiped the tears and sweat from Benny\u2019s face.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow look\u2026 you\u2019ve gotta understand that for as bad as you hate to get on that stage, it\u2019s even worse fer Pa\u2026an\u2019 with you carryin\u2019 on like this, it\u2019s just about ta\u2019 tear him up\u2026Don\u2019t none of us want you to go, but if you leave cryin\u2019 and howlin\u2019 like yer doin\u2019, Pa ain\u2019t never gonna get a moment\u2019s rest after yer gone.\u201d<\/p>\n

As he spoke, Hoss could feel Benny relax and settle against his chest. He pressed his lips to the top of Benny\u2019s now sweat-soaked head.<\/p>\n

\u201cDo you understand?\u201d Hoss leaned slightly to see Benny\u2019s face.<\/p>\n

Benny nodded in affirmation.<\/p>\n

\u201cOkay then,\u201d he stood up, placing the boy on the ground. Benny looked up, as if to protest the fact that Hoss was not going to continue to hold him.<\/p>\n

\u201cUh-uh\u2026\u201d Hoss shook his head at his brother, \u201cI carried ya in here, but yer gonna walk out on yer own, ya hear? And yer gonna go without cryin\u2019 and carryin\u2019 on. And yer\u2019 gonna show Pa that\u2019cha can do that so\u2019s he can put you on that stage without killin\u2019 himself over it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss thought he saw a brief flash of defiance in the child\u2019s eyes. Benny stood there for a moment, speechless. Finally, a tiny hand slipped into his own. Holding it as tightly as he dared, he led Benny back out to the stage.<\/p>\n

The men were talking quietly when the pair returned from the livery stable. Ben looked up in concern when he saw his sons approach.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny has somethin\u2019 to say to ya Pa,\u201d Hoss said, nudging Benny forward.<\/p>\n

Benny slowly walked to his father. With his head down he said, \u201cM\u2019sorry, Pa. I don\u2019t want\u2019cha ta\u2019 kill yer\u2019self or nothin\u2019. I\u2019ll go, and I\u2019ll be real good.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben frowned in confusion at the inference to him \u201ckilling\u201d himself, then dismissed the comment.<\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t you worry, son. I know you\u2019re going to be a good boy.\u201d After a final hug and kiss, Ben lifted Benny to put him on the stage. His hand moved to shut the door when Roy interrupted him.<\/p>\n

\u201cExcuse me, Ben.\u201d Roy moved passed Ben and climbed into the vehicle, plopping himself on the seat next to Benny.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2026\u201d Ben didn\u2019t understand what was happening. Before he could voice his question, Mr. Whitaker spoke up again.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhatever are you doing? It is high time we left!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, then let\u2019s go!\u201d Roy barked back.<\/p>\n

The dumbfounded expressions of the men staring back at him, prompted him to explain. \u201cJust so happens I need to see a fella\u2019 in Carson City \u2018bout a new horse. Thought it seemed like a good day to go.\u201d His kind eyes traveled to Ben\u2019s.<\/p>\n

Ben sighed with relief. Roy was so observant, so intuitive. Ben stepped to the stage window.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026Thanks Roy\u2026you have no idea how much\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t mention it,\u201d Roy said, eyes squinting as he smiled sympathetically. \u201cI\u2019ll stay with\u2019im till they leave. Wish I could do more\u2026I\u2019ll stop by yer\u2019 place this evenin\u2019 when I get back\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben breathed a short prayer as he closed the door to the stage. He glanced up at the driver, wondering if he knew just how precious his cargo was. A moment later the stage was making its way down the dusty main road of Virginia City. Ben stood there for what seemed like an eternity, watching the stage until his eyes could no longer distinguish it from the blurred landscape of Nevada.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa?\u201d Ben turned toward Adam\u2019s voice. His son was looking around at the inquisitive crowd that had gathered. \u201cLet\u2019s get out of here\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

The four returned to the buckboard, ignoring the stares of their neighbors. With a click of his tongue, Hoss started the team of horses. The men sat silently, all dreading the return to the house that would now seem so empty.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

The four Cartwright men sat dejectedly around the great room that evening, each trying to preoccupy himself with this or that as they waited for the sheriff\u2019s promised visit. Joe sat on the hearth, his pistol lying in pieces on the stones beside him. Every now and again he would pick up this part or that and rub it with a greasy cloth. Adam sat next to him in the blue chair, staring at the journal in his lap. He\u2019d written a few words, but for the most part he\u2019d simply doodled in the margins, unable to concentrate.\u00a0 Hoss sat on the settee, one foot propped up on the coffee table holding one end of a bridle taught so that he could have both hands free to mend the other end. Ben stared into the fire from his spot in his leather chair. He held an old, worn Bible in his hand. Occasionally he would flip through the book to find a scripture and read it, but the fire always seemed to recapture his attention. He\u2019d try another passage, only to have his mind wander again. Thus was the way the Cartwrights found themselves when they finally heard the long-awaited sound of horse hooves approaching. At once, they all stood and hurried to the door.<\/p>\n

Ben was the first to reach the door. Opening it, he strained so his eyes could focus on the familiar form of his dear friend who emerged from the darkness.<\/p>\n

\u201cHow\u2019s my boy?\u201d Ben asked, hurrying out into the yard.<\/p>\n

Roy Coffee held up his hand reassuringly.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe did just fine, let\u2019s go in and I\u2019ll tell ya ever\u2019thin\u2019 that happened.\u201d<\/p>\n

Roy eased his weary body out of the saddle. He tied his horse and turned to follow his friends into the house. The great room was warm and Roy found himself drawn immediately to the hearth to help rid himself of the chill that had set into his bones. For the afternoon to have been so blazing hot, it sure had managed to get awfully cold after the sun went down, he mused.<\/p>\n

Ben motioned to the chair, offering him the seat.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo thank ya Ben, I\u2019ve been sittin\u2019 on my hind quarters fer most\u2019a the day. I\u2019d just as soon stand.\u201d<\/p>\n

Seeing the anxiety in the eyes before him, Roy decided to forego any further small talk and commence to the point. Hat in hand, he took a deep breath and stared straight at Ben.<\/p>\n

\u201cI tell ya Ben, that\u2019s quite a boy you got,\u201d he said shaking his head, \u201cunder the circumstances, things couldn\u2019t\u2019a gone better.\u201d<\/p>\n

Seeing Ben relax a little, Roy continued.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, he whimpered a bit when we first left, but\u2026 \u2018bout ten minutes in I got\u2019im talkin\u2019 bout that presents you boys gave\u2019im,\u201d he let a quiet chuckle escape, \u201cwanted to compare his new toys to a real sheriff\u2019s badge and gun.\u201d He stopped, remembering the look on the boy\u2019s face when. To help pass the time, he\u2019d told Benny of some of his \u2018adventures\u2019 as sheriff.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen we got to Carson City, I thought that fool Whitaker was gonna have a fit cause I wouldn\u2019t be on my merry way,\u201d Roy paused, to rub his hand over his whiskered chin and cheeks. \u201cBut I stayed with\u2019im till we met up with Mrs. Richardson.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRoy, I don\u2019t know how to thank you\u2026\u201d Ben said, grateful for the blessing of a loyal friend.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I just couldn\u2019t see lettin\u2019 the little guy go by hisself with just that man Whitaker who couldn\u2019t care less iffen he\u2019s scared\u2019er not.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo\u2026\u201d Adam spoke up hesitantly. \u201c\u2026 how did he react to his mother?\u201d<\/p>\n

Roy shook his head in disbelief. \u201cI tell you he was a perfect little gentleman \u2013 you\u2019d never have known that just a few hours before he was carryin\u2019 on like he was\u2026 Guess he just decided he wasn\u2019t going to make it harder than it had to be.\u201d<\/p>\n

The Cartwrights were both shocked and relieved by this. Ben breathed a prayer of thanksgiving that God had answered that prayer at least.<\/p>\n

\u201cI think it also helped that Miss Jeannette was there. He went straight to her.\u201d<\/p>\n

Roy gave a full accounting of the day\u2019s events right up to Benny\u2019s departure on the late afternoon train. When he finished, the clock on the wall announced that it was time to head back to Virginia City. He smiled and brushed off the family\u2019s repeated thanks as though it were nothing, and then politely dismissed himself.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll walk you out Roy,\u201d Ben offered, ushering Roy to the door.<\/p>\n

The two walked out to where Roy\u2019s horse was waiting.<\/p>\n

\u201cRoy, I really can\u2019t thank you enough\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t mention it\u2026 like I said, I had business in Carson anyway.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben raised an eyebrow and offered a slight grin.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes\u2026 I meant to comment on the \u2018new\u2019 horse you bought,\u201d he said, sarcastically eyeing the familiar animal in front of him.<\/p>\n

Roy smiled back and extended his hand. After a firm handshake, Ben cast a shy glance back toward the house.<\/p>\n

\u201cUm, Roy\u2026 one other thing\u2026\u201d\u00a0 he stepped closer, lowering his voice, \u201chow was\u2026 um\u2026 how was Genevieve?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, come on Ben \u2013 you can\u2019t be serious!\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s face flushed at the volume of his friend\u2019s voice. Roy harrumphed. He couldn\u2019t believe that after all she\u2019d put him through, Ben still cared enough to ask after her. \u2018Cared\u2019 about her? No, Roy knew better than that. In spite of his anger at what she\u2019d done, Ben loved her.<\/p>\n

\u201cRoy, please\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Roy sighed heavily, searching for words.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe\u2019s fine\u2026 looked a little tired, I reckon, but \u2026\u201d Roy stopped. Come to think of it, she had looked more than tired. He recalled her sunken features and pale complexion and how they were a stark contrast to what he remembered of her. \u201c\u2026She\u2019s fine I reckon,\u201d he repeated and left it at that.<\/p>\n

Chapter 15 \u2013 Exotic New Orleans<\/strong><\/p>\n

Benny listened politely \u2013 though bored out of his mind \u2013 as his mother and aunt rattled on excitedly about how much he would love New Orleans. \u201cAn exotic city\u201d is what they had repeated over and over. The truth was, he had no idea what the word \u201cexotic\u201d meant. He guessed it must have been a rather grand thing from the way the women kept saying it.<\/p>\n

Benny squirmed. His backside was sore from sitting for so long. The buggy they were riding in hit a dip in the road and Benny found himself sliding off the slick leather seat. Readjusting himself to the proper position, he poked his head out of the buggy to investigate. He frowned. That pothole had been the most interesting thing to happen in the last two days.<\/p>\n

\u201cAre we almost there?\u201d he asked curiously, bringing his head back into the vehicle. As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he flushed. His father and brothers had often gotten on to him when he\u2019d asked that question a hundred times while they were traveling.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, dear,\u201d his mother replied with a smile, \u201cit won\u2019t be long now.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny slouched in his seat, allowing himself to half sit, half lay. For the moment, his traveling companions were silent. He didn\u2019t mind. Actually, he rather welcomed the hiatus with relief. He had not been around many women in his life, but after the last few weeks of travel, he now believed he knew the difference between boys and girls. He and his brothers and Pa could go hours upon end and not say a thing if they didn\u2019t feel the need. Girls on the other hand, were apparently never at a loss for words.<\/p>\n

At this particular moment, though, everyone was silent. And that suited Benny just fine \u2013 well, it would have suited him just fine had both women not been staring at him. He shifted uncomfortably. On the rare occasion when they did run out of things to say, they took on the habit of staring at him, making him<\/em> feel the need to then say something.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s remarkable isn\u2019t it \u2013 the similarity?\u201d His mother commented quietly.<\/p>\n

\u201cRemarkable, indeed.\u201d Aunt Jeanette answered, equally as quiet.<\/p>\n

There they go again,<\/em> Benny thought. His ears were tired of listening, and he had no desire to know what they were talking about. He sat up in his seat and turned to look at their surroundings. In the distance he could see evidence of a large city and realized that his mother had been correct; they were almost there.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026Benny?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHuh? \u2013 I mean, yes ma\u2019am?\u201d Benny asked, turning his attention from the landscape back to the women.<\/p>\n

\u201cI said, I can\u2019t wait for you to see New Orleans!\u201d Aunt Jeanette said with a smile.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy brother, Joe has been there before \u2013 he\u2019s told me lots about it.\u201d Benny said, doubting that it could possibly be the same as his brother remembered. Joe was an old grownup and probably hadn\u2019t been to New Orleans in a hundred years. Things would certainly have changed in that amount of time, he surmised.<\/p>\n

As they entered the outskirts of the city, the air was thick with the scent of gun powder and smoke. Building after building lay in ruins, either burned or demolished. People seemed to be everywhere. Some pushed carts full of debris, others wandered around aimlessly and still others poked around in the rubble as if to find something that was lost. From no direction in particular came the sound of women and children wailing loudly.<\/p>\n

An old man with filthy clothing ran up to their carriage in a panic.<\/p>\n

\u201cMrs. Blakely! It\u2019s all lost!\u2026Lost\u2026\u201d The man cried.<\/p>\n

\u201cJean, what happened here?\u201d Jeanette spoke loudly to be heard over the man\u2019s sobbing.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe Yanks have gotten through!\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny shuddered at the scene before him. This was the \u201cexotic\u201d New Orleans they\u2019d told him about? Misery was all around them. His heartbeat quickened and he felt a sharp pang in his stomach. He did not like this place \u2013 it scared him, and he wanted to go home.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey burned everything they came across \u2013 but not before they took what they wanted\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny watched as Jeanette\u2019s eyes widened in horror. \u201cJean\u2026 the farm\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

The man shook his head, raising his hands, \u201cThey didn\u2019t burn it \u2013 not when I told them who you were\u2026 They took all of your horses \u2013 and the meat from one of the smoke houses. Other than that, they left the place alone. Few others were as fortunate\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette nodded.<\/p>\n

\u201cJean, see that Mrs. Richardson and her son get to their home \u2013 I\u2019ll stay and\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny looked up in horror at his aunt. Surely, she was not going to leave him!<\/p>\n

\u201cNo!\u201d He found himself repeating over and over as the horrid surroundings seemed to swirl about him. He could feel warm tears stinging his eyelids. He did not want to be left in this terrible place by himself. He gasped for breath and his face and limbs began to feel tingly.<\/p>\n

A moment later, he found himself in his mother\u2019s lap. She hushed him quietly saying something about \u201ctoo much for one so young.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t wanna stay here. I wanna go home!\u201d\u00a0 he cried.<\/p>\n

He closed his eyes, pressing out a steady stream of tears. His mother rocked him, speaking softly in his ear. He felt the carriage begin to move. The pain burned inside. He desperately wanted his Pa and brothers.<\/p>\n

He opened his eyes. Everything was blurry through his tears. This was \u201cexotic\u201d New Orleans. His eyes darted from one thing to another, unable to make sense of what was around him.<\/p>\n

He decided then, \u201cexotic\u201d was a truly horrible thing. This was his last thought before he passed out in his mother\u2019s arms.<\/p>\n

Chapter 16 \u2013 A Turn of Events<\/strong><\/p>\n

For the Cartwrights the weeks that followed Benny\u2019s departure were trying ones. Each man attempted to keep himself as busy as possible in order to keep from dwelling on things that couldn\u2019t be changed. At last, they had all but run out of things to do with themselves. The ranch had never looked so good, and they were even ahead of schedule with their timber and ore contracts.<\/p>\n

One late June evening, Little Joe burst into the house, waving an envelope in his hand.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa! Adam! Hoss!\u201d Joe shouted as he ran through the great room. \u201cWe got a letter from Jeanette!\u201d<\/p>\n

A moment later Ben, Adam and Hoss emerged from various areas of the house.<\/p>\n

\u201cLittle Joe, what you yellin like that for?\u201d Hoss asked, scowling at his brother.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe got a letter from Jeanette,\u201d Joe repeated.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat?\u201d Ben questioned, snatching the envelope from his son\u2019s hand.<\/p>\n

Ben tore open the envelope. The message was scribbled on a telegram request form and was clearly shoved hastily into an envelope and sealed.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, go ahead\u2026 read it,\u201d Adam prodded, a little impatient.<\/p>\n

Ben read allowed: \u201c\u2019New Orleans lost to Union. Destruction everywhere. Benny and Genevieve are safe. Do not come yet. Await further information. Jeanette.\u201d<\/p>\n

At the bottom was another quick note jotted down which explained the unusual communique: \u201cWires down.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben quickly flipped back to the envelope to look at the postmark date. It had been sent a few weeks prior, likely not long after they would have arrived in New Orleans.<\/p>\n

The men stared at each other, lost. Silence hung in the air for several moments. Ben startled his sons out of their shock with his quick movement toward the door.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhere are you going, Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIs the train still running straight through to New Orleans?\u201d Ben asked to no one in particular.<\/p>\n

\u201cI think I read in the paper that it was cut off a few days from there,\u201d Adam said, trying to recall the article, \u201cThe tracks were destroyed by soldiers.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded and thought for a moment.<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe \u2013 you go get our things packed. You\u2019ll come with me. I\u2019m going to town to make the arrangements. Adam and Hoss, I\u2019ll need you two to stay here.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben looked into the faces of each of his sons.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m afraid this is liable to take a long while\u2026\u201d he looked at the ground, shaking his head, \u201cI should never have let them take him\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPa\u2026\u201d Hoss put a hand firmly on his father\u2019s shoulder, \u201c\u2026 are you sure you don\u2019t want Adam and me to go along? Could be pretty rough down there \u2013 ya might need some extra help\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben shook his head again, \u201cNo\u2026I don\u2019t wish to draw any unnecessary attention to ourselves. That war is not our fight. I just want to get my boy back.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou better get goin\u2019 then,\u201d Hoss said, nodding in agreement with his father\u2019s wishes.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll be about an hour behind you, Pa,\u201d Joe said over his shoulder as he turned to go upstairs to pack their things.<\/p>\n

Adam offered a reassuring smile, \u201cWe\u2019ll hold down the fort while you\u2019re gone\u2026 you just hurry back.\u201d<\/p>\n

After a firm handshake and a few last words of instruction to each of his older sons, Ben mounted his horse and galloped away.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

The night was hot and sticky, without the luxury of even a small breeze. Benny had tossed and turned, finally forgoing the covers. As he lay sprawled out on his bed, sweating uncomfortably, he tried to figure in his head how long he\u2019d been away from home. He customarily did this at night when he had problems sleeping. As best he could figure it had been about four weeks. Not that it really mattered, it had seemed like an eternity to him. He pushed the thought from his mind as he wiped at a few beads of sweat with the back of his hand. He contemplated removing his nightshirt. Deciding against it, he climbed out of bed and crossed the room to the water basin. As he splashed a handful of cool water on his face, he became aware of the sound of voices coming from down the hall.<\/p>\n

Quietly, he opened his bedroom door and tiptoed in the direction of the voices. He arrived at his mother\u2019s bedroom. The door was slightly ajar allowing a bit of soft lamplight to spill out into the hall. Benny came as close as he dared without risking detection. Leaning further, he listened.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026 Mrs. Richardson, I\u2019m sorry I couldn\u2019t be more promising, but your condition has worsened,\u201d a man\u2019s voice was saying.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh Amos, you\u2019re such a worry wart, I\u2019ll be fine. I just got a little tired that\u2019s all,\u201d Genevieve laughed, though it didn\u2019t sound like a funny situation to Benny.<\/p>\n

\u201cMrs. Richardson\u2026 Genevieve, you really must take it easy.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAmos, there\u2019s no sense just lying here in bed waiting for the end to come. I have a son in there that I intend to get to know before my time comes.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cGenevieve, just promise me you\u2019ll take it easy.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI promise.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny tiptoed back to his room before someone caught him out of bed. He slipped under his covers, wondering at the exchange he\u2019d just witnessed. He laid his head on the pillow, but sleep did not come. He thought of the woman down the hall \u2013 the mother he hardly knew. For reasons he couldn\u2019t explain, he felt very sorry for her.<\/p>\n

Chapter 17 \u2013 The Wheels of Fate<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ben heaved a long, weary sigh as he allowed his body to sink into his seat on the train. He ran a hand over his face as if to wipe away his sleepiness. What a long day it had been. After receiving the letter from Jeanette, Ben had gone to town to ask about the quickest transportation to New Orleans. Apparently, the trains were all awry due to the war. They would need to make the trip half on train, and half on horseback. Although, simply getting to the train had proven to be a bit of an undertaking as they had encountered a number of other small delays. It had begun to storm just as they were leaving Virginia City and, to make matters worse, Joe\u2019s horse had thrown not one, but two shoes along the way. They had barely boarded the train when the massive steal wheels had begun to turn. Now Ben found himself wet, hungry, and extremely exhausted.<\/p>\n

\u201cI thought for a while we weren\u2019t gonna make it in time,\u201d Joe commented as he took his seat across from Ben.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, let\u2019s just hope there aren\u2019t anymore delays,\u201d Ben said, readjusting his position to make himself more comfortable.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou know Pa, it\u2019s been a long time since you and I have taken this trip together,\u201d Joe said with a smile.<\/p>\n

Ben nodded, a faint smile spreading across his own face. \u201cYes, in fact the last time you and I went to New Orleans was when \u2013 when I first met Genevieve.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s smile faded. \u201cI\u2019m sorry, Pa. I didn\u2019t mean to bring up\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben shrugged it off, \u201cNothing to be sorry about, Son.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe nodded sheepishly. At length, he sat back and pulled his hat down over his eyes.<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s grin deepened as he watched the young man in front of him. What had happened to that boy who had made this journey with him those years ago? Ben allowed his mind to wander to the events of that life-altering trip he and his son had made.<\/p>\n

It was to have been a two month trip altogether. Two weeks there and two weeks back, leaving the month in between for their stay in New Orleans. Since Marie\u2019s death, Ben and Joe had taken this trip every other summer. It was important to Ben that Joe grow up knowing the childhood home of his mother. While there, they would stay with Marie\u2019s life-long friends, the Marceaus.<\/p>\n

That last trip had begun no differently than the others. On the appointed day, they arrived in New Orleans and in short order found themselves settled into the Marceau household. As was their tradition, the Marceau\u2019s held a dinner party on the night of their arrival. It was at this dinner party that Mrs. Marceau introduced Ben to her cousin-in-law, Genevieve.<\/p>\n

Ben felt his heart skip a beat at the mere thought of their first meeting. She had been wearing a very fashionable gown of light green. Her hair was pinned up pristinely in a fashionable way, showing of her beautiful neckline. Ben recalled being taken with her from the moment they met. She was nothing if not breathtakingly beautiful and her charm and sweet spirit had done nothing to wane his attraction to her. She had been everything that was good.<\/p>\n

Ben stared out of the train window, watching the landscapes of Nevada scroll by. The mountains in the distance were bathed in the soft pink glow of dusk. Genevieve had always loved the Nevada sunsets. His mind drifted back to that whirlwind romance those few years ago.<\/p>\n

They had met and courted and married within the span of that trip. Of course, the trip had been prolonged for the occasion. Ben had wired Adam and Hoss to let them know they would be extending their trip for another month \u2013 and why. He\u2019d regretted having to tell them that way \u2013 and that there wasn\u2019t a way for him to have the entire family together for the blessed event. But things being what they were, Hoss and Adam were in no position to leave the Ponderosa unattended and Ben couldn\u2019t very well go gallivanting across the country with his intended before they were married \u2013 things like that just weren\u2019t done.<\/p>\n

Ben found himself smiling at the memories, then quickly shook them from his mind. How had things gone so wrong? And when had they gone wrong. One day she was the beautiful and loving woman he\u2019d married, and the next she was gone with very little in the way of a decent explanation. Ben often thought he recalled noticing a fear about her in those last few months before she left. He had simply chalked it up to her being homesick for her family and had vowed to take her back for a visit the following spring. Alas, even that was never to be, as she left before he\u2019d even been able to share the idea with her.<\/p>\n

Her actions since had been horrifically contrary to the sweet-tempered woman he knew her to be: giving Benny away, asking \u2013 no, begging<\/em> him for a divorce. Ben still couldn\u2019t make sense of it. How could two people go from one extreme to the other in such a short amount of time? His stomach knotted itself and he felt a lump forming in his throat. He missed her \u2013 missed the woman she had been.<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s eyes became heavy as he continued to stare out the window. The sun had set and soon nothing would be visible. He looked across at Joe, who was now snoring softly, his hat still covering his face. Ben thought the idea seemed like a good one. Adjusting his position, he lowered his own hat over his eyes and allowed his body to succumb to a very unrestful sleep.<\/p>\n

Chapter 18 \u2013 A Reunion Surprise<\/strong><\/p>\n

As the buckboard made its way up the lane to the Marceau estate, Ben squinted to see any sign of his youngest son. As they approached the main house he caught sight of a boy with black curly hair, clad only in a pair of warn overalls. He was shirtless and his rib bones rippled under tanned skin as the child stooped to pick up an armful of wood from a woodpile. At the sound of their coming, the boy turned to face them squarely. Ben\u2019s heart leapt. It was Benny.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny!\u201d Ben jumped out of the wagon, though it was still moving. Stumbling, then catching his balance, he ran toward the child. \u201cBenny!\u201d As he neared the boy, he slowed his pace then dropped to his knees in front of his son. He alternated holding the boy by his arms and then pushing him back to look intensely at him, as though to convince himself that his son was indeed right there with him. Ben\u2019s heart ached when he noticed how much he\u2019d grown \u2013 at least an inch \u2013 since they\u2019d said goodbye on the stage more than two months ago. He looked into the boy\u2019s face. It seemed different. Ben\u2019s heart broke again as he realized how much his son had changed in just a few short months. It was then that he realized the child looking back at him was not relieved in any way to see him. In fact, his face held an expression of curiosity, even fear. \u201cBenny,\u201d he repeated softly.<\/p>\n

\u201cMister, I don\u2019t know who you are, but I ain\u2019t Benny,\u201d the child said backing out of Ben\u2019s reach.<\/p>\n

Ben scowled. Of course he was Benny. What was the matter with him? Was he sick? Did he get hurt? Could he not remember? A million thoughts and fears ran through Ben\u2019s mind all at once.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny\u2019s in the barn feedin\u2019 Lulu,\u201d the child pointed at a building just past the large house.<\/p>\n

Ben stared at the boy skeptically.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll show you,\u201d the child said, dropping the armful of wood.<\/p>\n

By this point, Joe had arrived in the yard with the buckboard and dismounted.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s wrong with him?\u201d Joe whispered, coming up behind his father.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know,\u201d Ben replied, then moved to follow the boy to the barn.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey Benny!\u201d The child called out, startling the men, \u201cSomeone here\u2019s lookin\u2019 for ya.\u201d<\/p>\n

A head full of black curls peeked out from behind the barn door. Ben\u2019s jaw dropped. It was Benny. No, this<\/em> was Benny. Ben looked at the child standing next to him and back again to the one now emerging from the barn.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa!\u201d The boy ahead of him screamed and came running toward him. \u201cPa!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny?\u201d Ben asked softly, now not knowing what to think or believe.<\/p>\n

The arms that encircled his neck were proof enough that this was indeed his son. The boy looked up, suddenly becoming aware of Joe\u2019s presence.<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe!\u201d He jumped down from his father\u2019s arms and ran to his brother but stopped short when he saw Joe\u2019s dumbfounded expression. Ben and Joe stared from one child to the other with gaping mouths. Benny turned to look at the other boy then with a knowing grin said, \u201cThis is Johnny. He\u2019s my brother too.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben felt the world begin to spin as identical faces smiled up at him.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, not again\u2026\u201d he heard Joe\u2019s voice say. He felt his son\u2019s arms supporting his body. His last conscious thought was of a single word\u2026 twins.<\/p>\n

He\u2019d fainted. Again.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

The sound of distant voices murmuring quietly reached his ears. Ben felt the weight of his body pressing into soft cushions. He willed his eyes to open and started slightly at the sight of Benny, who was inches away from his face.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s awake, Aunt Jeanette!\u201d the boy fairly screamed, making Ben\u2019s ears ring.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny?\u201d Ben managed.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m over here, Pa,\u201d it was then that he realized he was lying on a sofa. Benny was standing behind his head.<\/p>\n

Slowly, he sat upright. The boys moved in front of him, concern evident in their eyes. Ben looked at the faces before him, neither looking exactly like the one he\u2019d said goodbye to two months prior. Speechless, he continued studying their faces. At closer look, they weren\u2019t exactly identical. He recognized Benny\u2019s piercing blue eyes, sunken cheeks, and smaller stature. The other boy \u2013 what was his name? Jimmy? Jerry? \u2013 had deep brown eyes, a slightly fuller face and was a good inch taller than Benny.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou alright, Pa?\u201d the boy on the right asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s a good thing that other fella was there to catch you \u2013 or you\u2019d\u2019a cracked yer head real good,\u201d the boy on the left remarked matter-of-factly.<\/p>\n

Ben blinked a few times, the shock finally beginning to subside. Looking around for the \u201cother fella\u201d, he realized it was just the three of them in the living room. Ben felt a small hand touch his knee. He turned back to see Benny now standing between his knees, his face very solemn.<\/p>\n

\u201cI knew you\u2019d come,\u201d he whispered almost inaudibly and leaned against Ben\u2019s chest.<\/p>\n

Ben felt his throat constrict. He swallowed hard and lifted the boy to his knee and held him close.\u00a0 He looked uncomfortably at the other boy, who stared back at them curiously.<\/p>\n

\u201cHere\u2019s a glass of water \u2013 drink it slowly.\u201d\u00a0 Jeannette\u2019s voice startled them all.<\/p>\n

Ben looked up, accepting the cool glass.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhere is Joe?\u201d he asked before taking a sip.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, there\u2019s a storm coming, so he offered to get what few stock we have left penned up before it gets here\u2026 I see you\u2019ve met\u2026 everyone\u2026\u201d Jeanette said, eyeing the two boys.<\/p>\n

Ben nodded, a frown coming to his face. \u201cAnd I have just one simple question for you.\u201d He paused a moment, taking Benny off his lap. \u201cWhat in blazes is going on here?\u201d His voice boomed suddenly, making Jeanette and the boys flinch.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, I am sorry, Ben\u2026 I\u2019d hoped to catch you first\u2026 to prepare you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPrepare me\u2026\u201d Ben echoed, a bit annoyed.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, yes\u2026 I mean it\u2019s quite remarkable \u2013 shocking \u2013 but remarkable,\u201d she offered with a hopeful smile. Ben\u2019s face still held a steady frown.<\/p>\n

She held out her hands, signaling the boys to join her where she stood. Bare feet padded their way over to her. With an arm around each, Jeanette smiled broadly.<\/p>\n

\u201cBen, six years ago your son Benny \u2013 whom you love dearly \u2013 came into this world.\u201d Jeanette began, trying desperately to appeal to Ben\u2019s more affectionate side. She breathed deeply before continuing, \u201cBut\u2026 about five minutes before that, your other son, John Marceau Cartwright, was born.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben stared blankly at Jeanette, a million different emotions churning in his heart. He had no idea where to begin with his barrage of questions.<\/p>\n

\u201cJeanette\u2026\u201d Ben put his head in his hands, elbows resting on his knees, \u201cI think it\u2019s time you told me the truth \u2013 the whole truth.\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette nodded, her eyes darkening. She turned to the boys, a forced smile spreading across her face. \u201cWhy don\u2019t you two go outside and help Little Joe \u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

The boys nodded and left the room in a hurry, both more than willing to be out of doors on such a hot and muggy day.<\/p>\n

Ben watched them leave then turned to Jeanette. \u201cAlright now\u2026 From the beginning \u2013 and I\u2019ll not tolerate any more half truths or lies.\u201d<\/p>\n

Chapter 19 \u2013 Brothers In The Barn<\/strong><\/p>\n

The barn was quiet except for the sound of the livestock stirring. Both men stood next to their horses, quietly grooming them and putting saddle blankets in place. After some time passed, Hoss broke the silence.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, I just don\u2019t see how it\u2019ll help none\u2026\u201d he said, effortlessly lifting his saddle and placing it on his horse\u2019s back.<\/p>\n

Adam sighed. They\u2019d been over this a hundred times, and it seemed to be the only thing they could do from their end to help their father.<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, once that Judge in Carson understands what\u2019s happened, he\u2019ll renounce his earlier decision.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss frowned, none-too-convinced. \u201cWhat if he don\u2019t?\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam shrugged and looked up from the cinch he was tightening. \u201cWell, that\u2019s just a chance we\u2019ll have to take. But if Pa comes back with Benny and that judge finds out that he\u2019s gone against his ruling\u2026 well\u2026\u201d Adam\u2019s voice trailed off. He didn\u2019t need or want to finish that thought. He turned his attention back to the cinch.<\/p>\n

After saddling and bridling his horse, Hoss turned to his brother and offered a weak smile.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell\u2026 let\u2019s get to it then.\u201d<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Joe wiped the perspiration from his brow before spearing his pitchfork once again into the mountain of hay. He no sooner began his task again when beads of sweat reappeared on his forehead. He\u2019d forgotten how humid it was down here \u2013 very different from the dry climate of Nevada. He tossed a fork-full of hay to the milk cow in the corner stall.<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, how come this cow\u2019s gotta be locked up, but our ones at home don\u2019t?\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe looked up from his work at the two boys hanging on the stall gate next to him. He felt like he was seeing double. This twin thing was going to take some getting used to.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, our cows at home are beef cows \u2013 well, except for our few milking cows and we do keep them penned off \u2013 behind the barn.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHow many cows do ya\u2019ll got?\u201d Johnny asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cHun\u2019erds and hun\u2019erds of\u2019em!\u201d Benny said, a bit boastfully.<\/p>\n

Joe smiled and nodded. \u201cWell, we have too many to put them all in the barn, that\u2019s for sure!\u201d\u00a0 Joe shoveled another mound of hay and then turned back to the boys. \u201cSay, what\u2019re you two doing out here anyway? Why aren\u2019t you in the house with Pa and Jeanette?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019re helping you,\u201d Benny said with a smile.<\/p>\n

\u201cSome help!\u201d Joe laughed and tossed some hay at them. He burst out into laughter at the sight of their overall clad bodies drizzled with hay. \u201cNow you two look like scarecrows!\u201d<\/p>\n

The boys brushed the hay off and grinned mischievously at each other. Simultaneously, they leapt from the gate, each grabbing an armful of hay. With a squeal of laughter, they charged toward their attacker. Joe \u2013 still laughing – reached out and apprehended each boy by his suspender straps, promptly ending their coup.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow,\u201d he said grinning at the two boys, \u201chow about you two scarecrows go get me a few buckets of water for this poor thirsty cow?\u201d<\/p>\n

Chapter 20 \u2013 Attempting An Explanation<\/strong><\/p>\n

Jeanette took a deep breath, her eyes glazing with unshed tears. She had no idea where to start her sister\u2019s tale of ill-begotten dreams and endless cycle of mistakes made in moments of fear.<\/p>\n

\u201cBefore you met Genevieve \u2013 in fact, the summer before you met her \u2013 our mother passed away\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded, his face still holding a frown. She found it difficult to avert her gaze from the piercing brown eyes that were staring her down. She shifted uncomfortably and forced herself to continue.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe died of some sort of heart problem \u2013 a condition that evidently runs in our family. The doctors don\u2019t really know what it is, or how to cure it, but apparently the symptoms are usually evident from early childhood \u2013 small birth weight, very weak heartbeat, things like that I suppose. Growing up, Genevieve and I had always known the risks of one or both of us turning up with it. But, as we approached adulthood with no problems, we became fairly certain that we\u2019d escaped that horrid fate.\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette fidgeted with the handkerchief she held in her lap, unsure of how to proceed. How could he possibly understand? He hadn\u2019t seen what this disease could do to a person. She had seen it, though. She had sat at the bedside of her mother and her sister and seen them both wither away to practically nothing \u2013 and in more pain than could possibly be imagined. How did one go about explaining something like that? She looked into Ben\u2019s accusing eyes and wanted to cry. Of course he was mad. Why wouldn\u2019t he be? She took another deep breath and inwardly cursed the disgusting fate that had torn these two lovers apart.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou two had been married for about a year \u2013 and she was so happy\u2026 so very happy\u2026 then she began to experience the same symptoms our mother had had \u2013 the chest pains, difficulty breathing, vomiting, weakness\u2026 She wrote to the doctor that attended our mother and he travelled to meet her in Carson City. That was when she found out her suspicions were correct.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy didn\u2019t she tell me?\u201d Ben asked evenly, skepticism written all over his face.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe wanted to, but when she thought of all the loss you\u2019d suffered over the years \u2013 with your other wives \u2013 she just couldn\u2019t bring herself to tell you that you\u2019d have to go through it all over again.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo that\u2019s why she left?\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette shrugged, \u201cI think she figured it would be better for her to leave and for you to believe she didn\u2019t love you, than for you to have to watch her die\u2026and in such a way\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s glare sent a shiver down Jeanette\u2019s spine. Part of her wanted to be angry with him for not understanding and the other part couldn\u2019t blame him in the least if he never wanted to see Genevieve again.<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd the children?\u201d Ben asked.<\/p>\n

Jeanette nodded and hurried on. \u201cWhen she left you, she came here to live with me in New Orleans. I told her I didn\u2019t think it was the right thing to do \u2013 but in the end, I couldn\u2019t turn her away. Not long after she arrived, she found out she was expecting\u2026 It was a very difficult time for her \u2013 her condition worsened over those months and the doctors feared all three would be lost \u2013 though they didn\u2019t know she was carrying twins at the time\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben interrupted her, anger burning in his face, \u201cAnd you never told me\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

A few tears trickled down her cheeks at the accusation. She opened her mouth to protest but, in the end, her shoulders slumped and simply nodded.<\/p>\n

\u201cI told her you had a right to know \u2013 that she couldn\u2019t right a wrong with yet another mistake\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette dabbed at her eyes with her handkerchief.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt was an absolute miracle that she survived the births at all\u2026 when the boys were born, Johnny was healthy, though small \u2013 as twins usually are\u2026 But Benny\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Fresh tears came and she found herself unable to finish the thought.<\/p>\n

\u201cJeanette\u2026 what about Benny?\u201d The worry in Ben\u2019s face broke her heart.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026 Benny was so small and so weak\u2026\u201d she stared at the floor as though, in a trance, she was revisiting that day six years ago. \u201c\u2026so small\u2026 the doctor said that he\u2019d likely not last the night… Dr. Ford was able to pull him through, but said he was so weak he likely wouldn\u2019t live to see more than a couple of birthdays.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJeanette\u2026\u201d Ben said softly, urging her to explain further.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny\u2026 already had the symptoms\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Chapter 21 \u2013 What They Discovered in Carson City<\/strong><\/p>\n

Adam fanned his face with his hat as he entered the courthouse. Indoors was the last place he liked to be on such a hot day. At least outside one could enjoy an occasional breeze. Inside, it was just hot and stuffy.\u00a0 Pushing the thought from his mind, he made his way over to the front desk.<\/p>\n

\u201cCan I help you?\u201d the receptionist asked rather stoically.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes ma\u2019am, we need to speak to Judge Nelson,\u201d Adam said.<\/p>\n

Hoss was standing unnaturally close to him, and Adam stepped away slightly. Although he\u2019d agreed to go along with Adam\u2019s plan, Hoss made it very clear that he was uncomfortable with the whole idea.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry, but there\u2019s not a Judge Nelson here, sir.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, can you tell us where we might find him?\u201d<\/p>\n

The receptionist looked up at him curiously. \u201cI wouldn\u2019t know. Judge Snyder is the judge here in Carson City.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, I know. But Judge Nelson was brought in for a special case a few months ago. It\u2019s very urgent that we speak with him.\u201d<\/p>\n

The woman removed her spectacles, her polite expression turning to one of agitation.<\/p>\n

\u201cSir, I have already told you \u2013 there is no Judge Nelson\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam sighed impatiently.<\/p>\n

\u201cJust look for the file please \u2013 Cartwright \u2013 it would have been back in early May.\u201d<\/p>\n

The woman frowned for a moment, then reluctantly turned to a large filing cabinet. She rifled through a number of documents before finally turning back.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t have any record of a Cartwright. Perhaps another name?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOkay\u2026 um\u2026 try Richardson.\u201d Adam looked up, noting Hoss\u2019s rather skeptical expression.<\/p>\n

The woman turned again and flipped through some more papers.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo\u2026 no\u2026 I don\u2019t see anything\u2026 Are you sure it was here in Carson City?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMadam\u2026\u201d Adam pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. If he had any patience left at this point, he was holding on to it by a very thin tether. He spoke deliberately through clenched teeth. \u201cI was here not two months ago and sat in that courtroom with Judge Nelson presiding.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sure I would have remembered that \u2013 if it had happened.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s face burned with frustration. What did she mean \u201cif it had happened\u201d? He\u2019d just opened his mouth to give the woman a piece of his mind when he felt his brother\u2019s hand on his arm.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam\u2026\u201d Hoss said evenly.<\/p>\n

Adam nodded in resignation, stepping back from the desk. It wasn\u2019t often that he let his emotions get the better of him, but Hoss knew him well enough to know when he was at the end of patience. He stood back and allowed his brother to take over.<\/p>\n

\u201cMa\u2019am,\u201d Hoss moved forward addressing the woman, \u201cCain\u2019t you look to see if there is a Judge Nelson anywhere?\u201d<\/p>\n

The woman raised a thin eyebrow, heaved an irritated sigh and turned back to her filing cabinet. Pulling out a document, she put her spectacles on the end of her nose and scanned it.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt seems there was a Judge Thomas Nelson over in Placerville, but he\u2019s been dead for nearly ten years now.\u201d She handed the document to Hoss, who looked at it and passed it on to Adam.<\/p>\n

Adam read the paper. It listed the Judge\u2019s credentials and years of service as well as some other professional information that would only be of interest to someone in the legal field. Adam handed the document back to the woman and looked at his brother dejectedly.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry, gentlemen, but there is no Judge Nelson \u2013 at least not anymore.\u201d<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Ben felt a lump rise in his throat, as a million images of his son flashed through his mind. His heart refused to believe what Jeanette was implying.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou mean he\u2019s got this\u2026this\u2026 whatever this disease is?\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette nodded solemnly. Ben stared at her blankly, his appendages suddenly feeling a bit numb. At length, he gathered his thoughts enough to speak again.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo why did she send Benny to me?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShe decided that if Benny were to have a chance at life \u2013 it would be with you, on the Ponderosa. You clearly had the means to find the doctors for him, should he need them\u2026 So, in her thinking, it made sense to send you Benny.\u201d<\/p>\n

Made sense? Ben let out a soft, sarcastic snort. None of this made sense.<\/p>\n

Jeanette continued, \u201cMy husband died just before the boys were born and as Genevieve\u2019s medical expenses grew, we soon found ourselves unable to pay\u2026 she was content to deny herself the medical attention she needed \u2013 as long as Benny got it in her stead.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben put his head in his hands and pressed firmly on his temples, rubbing away the headache that had crept in.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo, instead of allowing us to spend whatever time we had left together, she ran off\u2026 to spare me the heartache of losing her, and instead\u2026 sent me a son who was dying? Why didn\u2019t she just tell me all of that in the first place? And why didn\u2019t she tell me about\u2026um\u2026\u201d Ben stuttered slightly, trying to recall the child\u2019s name, \u201c\u2026 uh\u2026. Johnny?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBen, she was afraid after she left. She had thought that her initial decision to leave you would \u2013 in the end \u2013 be the lesser of the two evils. But when she had the boys, she was afraid \u2013 afraid you\u2019d take them both away from her \u2013 out of anger for her leaving.\u201d<\/p>\n

Were it not for his frustration, Ben might have laughed at such irony.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo why did she want Benny back \u2013 after all this time?\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette took a deep breath, an expression of relief washing over her face.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe found this doctor\u2026 from Georgia\u2026 who has experience in treating this kind of illness \u2013 whatever it is. But he seems to be quite the expert with children. It seems it might be possible to treat it in children \u2013 before it\u2019s had a chance to reach a critical stage. When she found out about this doctor, she had to see about getting him to see Benny.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben frowned, unsure of what to believe anymore.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou said the doctors didn\u2019t think he would live long when he was born\u2026 what made her think he was even still alive?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell\u2026 remember, when I had been married, I was quite\u2026 well-to-do\u2026 I acquired many a loyal friend \u2013 Some people owed me favors and what not\u2026 So, we wrote to a friend in Carson City and asked him for any information he could give us.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, someone might have told me \u2013 instead of going through all of this deceit and the agony of those legal proceedings!\u201d Ben was fairly shouting at the woman by this point, though she sat only a few feet away from him.<\/p>\n

Jeanette\u2019s eyes filled will new tears again as she nodded in agreement.<\/p>\n

\u201cI know\u2026 I told her that, but she insisted that you would be angry and would tell her no \u2013 she said she just didn\u2019t have time to go through all of that.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben opened his mouth to protest further but was interrupted by a knock at the door. Jeanette excused herself quietly to answer it, leaving Ben to simmer on the sofa. From where he sat in the living room, he could see a young union soldier standing in the front doorway, handing Jeanette an envelope. The two conversed quietly for a moment before the soldier turned to leave.<\/p>\n

\u201cBen\u2026 you got a telegraph from Carson City\u2026I suppose they\u2019ve fixed the wires now.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben stood, accepting the envelope.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt appears many people respect the position you once held in society\u2026\u201d Ben turned with a raised eyebrow and looked out the window at the soldier riding away, \u201c\u2026for a soldier of the opposing army to hand deliver a telegram to you\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette simply nodded and took her seat. Ben opened the envelope and read its rather brief message:<\/p>\n

\u201cWent to Carson to speak with judge. No record of case. There is no Judge Nelson. Adam.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben glowered at Jeanette. In spite of all he\u2019d heard, he hadn\u2019t thought it possible for either her or Genevieve to sink this low. This was the final straw.<\/p>\n

Chapter 22 \u2013 Keeping Watch<\/strong><\/p>\n

Hoss yawned and stretched his weary muscles as he crossed the yard to the house. It had been a busy day. He preferred it that way, really. The busier he stayed, the less time he had to think about his missing family members. So, the weariness he felt now suited him just fine.<\/p>\n

Before he even reached the front door, the smell of fried chicken and mashed potatoes and hot biscuits reached his nose. His stomach grumbled and he picked up his pace. He crossed the great room quickly to the stairs to go wash up for dinner. As he walked down the hall to his room, he noticed Benny\u2019s bedroom door standing wide open. That was odd. It had been sort of an unspoken understanding in the house since Benny had left, that the door to his room was to remain shut. It was just too painful to walk by the vacant room and be constantly reminded that Benny was gone. Frowning curiously, he went to investigate. Inside, he found Adam standing at the window, arms folded across his broad chest.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019cha doin\u2019 Adam?\u201d he asked, entering the room.<\/p>\n

If Adam was startled, he didn\u2019t show it. He just kept staring out of the window.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam?\u201d Hoss repeated, moving closer to his brother.<\/p>\n

Adam released a long exhale before moving his hands to rest on his hips. When he spoke, his voice was quiet and hoarse.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen Joe was little \u2013 and this was his room \u2013 Marie used to ask me to come up here and get him ready for supper\u2026 I\u2019d get him cleaned up and then he\u2019d run to the window and watch for Pa\u2026 He loved to watch out this window cause he could see Pa coming a mile off\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss smiled, thinking it was a rather random thing for his brother to be reminiscing about. Then his grin broadened with his own memory.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I remember Ma gettin\u2019 real mad at us \u2013 a number of times \u2013 and sendin\u2019 us upstairs an\u2019 sayin\u2019 \u2018just wait till your Pa gets home.\u2019 Then we\u2019d all come in here and there\u2019d be three very worried faces pressed up against that window watchin\u2019 fer Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam didn\u2019t smile, only nodded in recollection, still looking at what lay beyond the window. Hoss\u2019s own smile faded, and he moved to place a gentle hand on his brother\u2019s shoulder.<\/p>\n

\u201cI miss\u2019em too\u2026 but I don\u2019t think lookin\u2019 out that window\u2019s gonna bring\u2019em back any sooner.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam nodded and looked around the room sadly. \u201cYeah, I know\u2026 let\u2019s go get some supper, huh?\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss flashed a gap-toothed grin and clapped his brother\u2019s back.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow that\u2019s what I\u2019m talkin\u2019 \u2018bout,\u201d he said softly.<\/p>\n

The two left the room quietly, closing the door as they went.<\/p>\n

Chapter 23 \u2013 How Could She?<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cBen, I swear! We did no such thing!\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette could feel the palms of her hands beginning to sweat as Ben walked frantically around the room, shouting loudly. In his fist he held the crumpled telegram.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou know,\u201d Ben stopped his pacing long enough to point a finger at her. \u201cI\u2019ve been more than patient through this entire ordeal, but this is just \u2026just\u2026 despicable! \u2013 No! It\u2019s worse than that!\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette pursed her lips in frustration. How was she supposed to convince him that they had not staged a fake judge, with him in this kind of temperament? Ben was so hard to read sometimes \u2013 well, not at times like the present of course, for he was very easy to read now. Before the telegram had been delivered, she\u2019d hoped that she was beginning to make him see the truth of the matter \u2013 that perhaps he wouldn\u2019t be as angry as she\u2019d feared he would be (and, in truth, as angry as he had a right to be). She and her sister had both made their mistakes. Jeanette knew inwardly that for as much as she\u2019d disagreed with Genevieve\u2019s rash decisions, she was just as guilty for going along with them.<\/p>\n

\u201cBen, listen to me!\u201d Ben and Jeanette were both taken aback at the surprising volume of her voice. Ben stared at her, mouth gaping open. Jeanette paused a moment to collect herself.<\/p>\n

\u201cBen,\u201d she began again, quieter this time, \u201cplease believe me. I don\u2019t know what this is about \u2013 we were also told that a judge would be brought in for the case \u2013 a judge with an unbiased opinion. I have no idea where this Judge Nelson came from\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette watched his face, trying to discern what he might be thinking. He was definitely not an easy one to read. She shook the thought from her mind and continued.<\/p>\n

\u201cBen \u2013 don\u2019t you think I would have told you? I\u2019ve spent the last hour confessing all the horrid details of the last six years \u2013 why would I refuse to admit to this?\u201d<\/p>\n

She turned away from him and closed her eyes. She wished fervently it would all just go away. That she could snap her fingers and things would immediately be put right. But then again, what was \u201cright\u201d at this point? She was sure she didn\u2019t know.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat do you want me to say?\u201d Ben\u2019s voice startled her back into the moment and she turned to face him. \u201cI\u2019ve spent years waiting and hoping that Genevieve would come back. That we could be a family again, the way we were supposed to be from the beginning. Then\u2026 at last, I was able to convince myself that she was not coming home.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s voice was now soft and raspy \u2013 a stark contrast from what it had been moments before.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m an old man\u2026 I hadn\u2019t planned on raising another child. But when Benny came, I did. And, as with my other boys, I\u2019ve loved him more than life itself. And now, you\u2019re telling me that, not only did my wife betray me, but now my son \u2013 the only truly good thing to result from our marriage \u2013 might be dying? And to top it off, you\u2019ve tainted our other child\u2019s future with an endless chain of bad decisions\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben was standing at the window with his back to her. Jeanette felt her stomach burning with grief and reminded herself, not for the first time that afternoon, that Ben had every right in the world to be upset. She didn\u2019t want to make excuses for the mistakes they\u2019d made, but she knew it was important for Ben to understand why they\u2019d made them.<\/p>\n

\u201cBen, Gen never gave you \u2013 your love \u2013 enough credit. But please understand that there is more to her story,\u201d Jeanette\u2019s shoulders slumped. \u201cBut you need to hear the rest from her.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI think it\u2019s time I spoke to Genevieve.\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette\u2019s eyes widened. Over the last few weeks since they\u2019d returned home, her sister\u2019s health had deteriorated rapidly. She knew their reunion would be inevitable, but she worried how Ben might react when he saw her. Still, she couldn\u2019t refuse him. Finally, she stood and nodded.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll take you up.\u201d<\/p>\n

Chapter 24 \u2013 One Lucky Frog<\/strong><\/p>\n

Joe sighed inwardly as he peeked nonchalantly out of the barn door toward the house. He had a hunch that the boys had been sent out to \u201chelp\u201d him so that his father could have it out with Jeanette and Genevieve. A hundred emotions churned inside of him at the thought. With the exception of the last few months, he\u2019d always rather liked both of the women. He\u2019d been so excited when his Pa and Genevieve had married. She was beautiful and sweet tempered \u2013 and best of all, she had not treated him like a little boy. She listened and talked with him \u2013 as though everything he had to say was just as important as any grown up. Joe laughed inwardly at the thought. It\u2019s funny how something like that can be so important to you when you\u2019re young<\/em>. She was not his mother \u2013 and never asked that he refer to her as such. But he always liked to believe that, if his own mother had lived, she might have been as sweet and beautiful as Genevieve.<\/p>\n

He\u2019d never let on, but he had been heart-broken when Genevieve left. He\u2019d spent a good deal of time wondering and worrying over what he\u2019d done to cause her to leave. In hindsight, he supposed that was a natural way for him to react given his age at the time. He\u2019d thought all of the pain was behind him now. But over the last few months, it had all been stirred back up again. He couldn\u2019t imagine how much worse it had been for Pa. His father still loved her. Of that, Joe was sure. For as stubborn and cantankerous as Ben Cartwright could be at times, he took matters of love and faith very seriously. When he had promised his life and heart to Genevieve those seven years ago, he\u2019d done so for life. Signing some measly little paper that said they were divorced didn\u2019t matter. He\u2019d vowed before God to love and cherish her until death. Even still, Joe knew his father loved his children and would not tolerate anybody hurting them \u2013 not even his wife.<\/p>\n

Joe turned back to the animals he had been tending as a low rumble of thunder shook the rafters of the barn. He could smell the rain in the air and knew the storm would be upon them in a matter of minutes. He hoped that the discussion going on inside the house would be at a stopping point soon. He didn\u2019t relish the thought of walking in during the middle of it and having to wait out the storm with the uncomfortable tension that was likely to be lingering.<\/p>\n

\u201cBoys, are you about ready to head in?\u201d Joe asked. \u201cThat storm\u2019s coming pretty quick now.\u201d<\/p>\n

Two heads popped up from behind an empty stall, then disappeared below again.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, just a second\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe heard them whispering excitedly and knew they were up to something. He crept over to the stall and peeked over its wall just in time to see one of the boys \u2013 he wasn\u2019t sure which \u2013 stuffing a bullfrog into his pocket.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh no you don\u2019t!!\u201d Joe shouted.<\/p>\n

The boys jumped at his voice.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut Joe\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou are NOT taking that thing into the house! Pa would have my head!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut it\u2019s sick\u2026\u201d the boys said, pouting.<\/p>\n

\u201cNot as sick as you\u2019re gonna be when Pa catches you with it. Now let it go and let\u2019s get inside before it rains.\u201d<\/p>\n

The boys gave each other a rather defeated frown and turned to let the frog go. Joe nearly laughed at how quickly it hopped away. The poor thing probably knew it wouldn\u2019t have survived whatever \u201ctreatment\u201d the boys were going to implement to help it get well.<\/p>\n

The frog had no sooner hopped off when the boys turned happily back to Joe, their \u201cpatient\u201d quickly forgotten. Joe shook his head with a grin and led them back to the house just as the first drops of the storm began to fall.<\/p>\n

Chapter 25 \u2013 Another Turn of Events<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ben followed Jeanette up the staircase and down the corridor to Genevieve\u2019s bedroom. Jeanette paused with her ear to the door for a moment before softly turning the knob and proceeding in. Ben entered behind her, surprised at how dark the room was.<\/p>\n

Since the bedroom was at the corner of the house it had windows lining two walls, all of which were masked by heavy drapes. Angled in the corner, near the windows, was a large bed, flanked on each side by a nightstand. In the middle of the bed was a waif of a form, cocooned in blankets and pillows. Ben strained to see in the dim light. His eyes widened in shock as he took sight of her.<\/p>\n

Blue eyes that had once been as bright and dazzling as the noonday sky, were now dull and recessed. Cheeks that had once been full and attractively pink, were now sunken and held a rather strange pallor. This could not be the young and vibrant woman he\u2019d married.<\/p>\n

Jeanette reached out to touch her sister. Genevieve\u2019s eyes fluttered open.<\/p>\n

\u201cGenevieve?\u201d Jeanette paused, watching for response. \u201cGenevieve, Ben is here\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben swallowed hard as he stared at the weak form on the bed, unable to believe it was actually her.<\/p>\n

\u201cBen?\u201d Genevieve\u2019s familiar voice reached his ears and he assured himself that it was, in fact, her.<\/p>\n

Jeanette turned and gave him a brief nod, then left the room. Ben stepped forward and took a seat at the edge of her bed. He looked at her, not knowing quite what to say or do. He\u2019d come up here ready for a fight. A fight with what? This?<\/p>\n

\u201cBen?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m here\u2026\u201d Ben thought he should reach out and take hold of her hand to assure her of his presence but found he couldn\u2019t bring himself to do so.<\/p>\n

\u201cWill you light the lamp?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben looked around, finding the lamp on the nightstand beside her. He struck a match and lit the wick of the lamp. As he turned back to her, he was relieved to see that her coloring looked slightly better in the light.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re upset\u2026\u201d she said quietly.<\/p>\n

For some reason Ben found himself shaking his head.<\/p>\n

\u201cI heard you downstairs yelling\u2026\u201d she drew in a long and raspy breath \u201c\u2026 you\u2019re upset.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou know\u2026 you shouldn\u2019t eaves drop\u2026\u201d Ben said flatly, unsure why he\u2019d offered such a lame attempt at humor \u2013 and at such a time.<\/p>\n

A faint smile washed across her face, but quickly disappeared.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re going to take them away, aren\u2019t you?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben pinched the bridge of his nose and gave a long, weary exhale.<\/p>\n

\u201cBy-golly I ought to\u2026\u201d His mind was muddled, and he wasn\u2019t sure what to say next. At last, he threw his hands up in exasperation, \u201cGenevieve\u2026 why?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben thought he saw a flash of protest in her eyes. Ultimately, though, she turned her head away from him in resignation. \u201cBecause I\u2019m a bad person\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo!\u201d Ben saw her start at his tone, but hurried on nonetheless, \u201cThat\u2019s just it Genevieve \u2013 You\u2019re not a bad person \u2013 at least you weren\u2019t. This isn\u2019t you! That\u2019s why I can\u2019t understand.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBen, I loved you too much to\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLove!\u201d Ben spat the word out in disgust. \u201cWas it for love that you left me? For love that you ruined the lives of our children? Was it love that made you beg me for a divorce? And for love that you\u2026\u201d he paused, his throat constricting, \u201c\u2026married another man?\u201d<\/p>\n

Now it was Ben who turned away, setting his jaw stubbornly against the pain in his heart.<\/p>\n

\u201cBen please\u2026\u201d He felt her hand touch his. It was clammy, but gentle. \u201c\u2026please let me explain\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou know Genevieve\u2026\u201d Ben turned to her with a glare, a sudden feeling of apathy washing over him. \u201cI don\u2019t think I want to hear it.\u201d<\/p>\n

He knew immediately that his words had hurt her, but he couldn\u2019t bring himself care.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou will<\/em> take them away from me\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben stood and turned to her, his eyes red and shimmering. He shook his head.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Genevieve, I won\u2019t\u2026 Because I\u2019m not like you. I won\u2019t pull Johnny away from the only parent he\u2019s ever known. He has a right to stay here until\u2026\u201d Ben stopped abruptly, not believing what he\u2019d almost said.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026until I die?\u201d Genevieve finished for him.<\/p>\n

Ben chided himself for his poor choice of words. In the end he simply nodded in affirmation.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, if you put any more saddle soap on there, yer gonna slip right off it the next time you mount up.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam looked up to find Hoss standing in the doorway of the barn, grinning broadly. He let out a soft laugh, suddenly realizing how long he\u2019d been at the task.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, I guess you\u2019re right.\u201d He tossed the soap container and rag onto a nearby bench and looked up at his brother again.<\/p>\n

\u201cDid you get that fencing done on the east ridge?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYup.\u201d Hoss nodded, absentmindedly twirling a strand of hay between two fingers.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe probably ought to get the herd moved from the upper pasture to the lower, don\u2019t you think?\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss shook his head. \u201cSmitty and the boys already done that this morning.\u201d<\/p>\n

A moment of bored silence descended. A cool, soft breeze came through the barn, bringing with it the unmistakable scent of Ponderosa Pine. Adam closed his eyes, enjoying the sensation of the wind against his sweaty face and arms. He wasn\u2019t one who was given much to taking naps, but if he wasn\u2019t mistaken, this was perfect napping weather \u2013 Sitting under the shade of a massive tree, hat pulled down over his face, the sound of the birds in the trees\u2026. At length, he allowed the thought to pass without consequence and moved on to more practical things.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, we could go and get those line shacks ready for winter \u2013 never hurts to plan ahead, you know.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam\u2026 them shacks are plenty stocked. Remember?\u00a0 We did that just last month.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh right\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWanna go into town \u2013 we could go an\u2019 have us a beer or somethin\u2019\u2026\u201d Hoss offered with a mischievous grin. Since Benny had come along, their time spent in saloons had been greatly reduced. Especially since nearly every time one of them came into town they had their little brother in tow.<\/p>\n

Adam shrugged. \u201cNah\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe could go fishin\u2019.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam turned up his nose. It wasn\u2019t the same without Benny. For as much as it tried his patience to take Benny fishing \u2013 it never failed, he always managed to fall into the water every time \u2013 it wouldn\u2019t be the same to go without him.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell that only leaves one thing left to do.\u201d Hoss said.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s that?\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss\u2019s eyes took on a distinct twinkle that Adam was all too familiar with. He grimaced, knowing that twinkle usually resulted in a near-death experience with their father. He felt a moment of relief though, knowing that Joe was nowhere around \u2013 When he was added to the mix, Adam could typically count on having a downright problem on his hands.<\/p>\n

\u201cNew Orleans ought\u2019ta have pretty good fishin\u2019 this time of year \u2013 don\u2019cha think?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ah, there it was. So, this was to be the manner of his demise this time. Adam scowled and shook his head firmly.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, absolutely not.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAh, come on Adam. There ain\u2019t nuthin\u2019 fer us to do here,\u201d Hoss fairly whined, \u201cRound \u2013 up and branding\u2019s done, we finished that ore contract last week and the lumber contract the week before that. There ain\u2019t nuthin needs doin\u2019 that the hands cain\u2019t take care of while we\u2019re gone\u2026 What could it hurt?\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam lowered his eyebrows evenly. \u201cNo.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019re we gonna do round here anyway? Just eat ourselves up with worry is all.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam had to admit, Hoss did have a point. The first two weeks after their father and Joe had left, they\u2019d managed to stay beyond busy. But now, everything had slowed to a snail\u2019s pace. They\u2019d intentionally not taken on any new contracts for the summer months, unsure of how the situation with the custody case would go and not wanting to get themselves into a bind time-wise.<\/p>\n

Adam rolled his eyes in defeat, realizing he really had no good argument to give. \u201cOh, all right\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss\u2019s grin returned, wider than before. \u201cI\u2019ll go into town first thing in the mornin\u2019 and see bout the train fare.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam clucked his tongue at his brother\u2019s excitement. \u201cYou know\u2026 Pa\u2019s gonna kill us\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Chapter 26 \u2013 A Light In The Darkness<\/strong><\/p>\n

As Ben walked down the hall leading away from Genevieve\u2019s room, he heard the front door open. Soon the sounds of children (with far too much energy for a rainy day) filled the house. He could hear Jeanette downstairs saying something about \u201ccookies and milk in the kitchen.\u201d Joe was somewhere below as well, making lighthearted comments to the boys.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa!\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben had barely reached the bottom of the stairs when Benny bounded up to meet him. He bent down and scooped the boy up.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, Pa\u2026\u201d Joe said from the bottom of the staircase, \u201cI\u2026 uh\u2026 hope we didn\u2019t interrupt\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben shrugged. \u201cNot at all.\u201d He gave Joe a wink, indicating they would talk later.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow, young man\u2026 I heard something about cookies and milk\u2026\u201d\u00a0 Ben gave Benny\u2019s stomach a tickle, making the child squirm in his arms giggling.<\/p>\n

The three followed Jeannette and Johnny into the kitchen and promptly took their seats at the table. Jeanette set out a plate of cookies and gave the boys each a glass of milk. She then set about pouring coffee for the rest of them.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, boys,\u201d Ben said, turning to the identical faces that were currently crammed full of cookies, \u201cDid you help Joe out in the barn?\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny made an attempt at an answer, spewing cookie bits all over the table.<\/p>\n

\u201cJohnny, swallow first, dear.\u201d Jeanette reprimanded.<\/p>\n

\u201cThorry\u2026\u201d Johnny said, swallowing hard and wiped his mouth on his bare arm before beginning again. \u201cWe helped a lot.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShore did!\u201d Benny piped up, an entire cookie stuffed into one cheek so he could speak. \u201cBut there wasn\u2019t that much to do\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben suppressed the urge to laugh at seeing the look on Joe\u2019s face. He knew what it was like trying to get work done with Benny\u2019s \u201chelp.\u201d Add another Benny to that mix and it could be near maddening! It would be a wonder if Joe had gotten anything done at all.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow boys,\u201d Jeanette spoke up again, \u201cwhen you get finished, I want you to go up and lay out your nice clothes. You\u2019ll be wearing them tomorrow.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAw\u2026 what for, Aunt Jeanette?\u201d Johnny whined wrinkling his nose.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019re going into town to see Doc Ford tomorrow,\u201d she explained, taking a sip of her coffee.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut Mama can\u2019t go nowhere \u2013 why don\u2019t he just come here to see her like he\u2019s been doin\u2019?\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette gave him a stern look. \u201cJust do as I ask, please.\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny shrugged and shoved another cookie in his mouth. Cheeks filled to capacity, he turned to Benny. \u201cYou ready?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny nodded and hopped down from his chair before turning back to Jeanette.<\/p>\n

\u201cAunt Jeanette? Where is Doc Ford\u2019s office at?\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette dabbed at her mouth with a napkin. \u201cNot far, Benny \u2013 just in town.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIn town \u2013 New Orleans?\u201d Benny asked quietly.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, why?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny frowned, backing slowly toward his father. Ben put his arm around his son and could feel his trembling. He looked down at him, questioning.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, I don\u2019t wanna go\u2026 I don\u2019t like that place\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

******<\/p>\n

\u201cGenevieve hadn\u2019t told me he\u2019d been that upset over it. I\u2019d had to spend that first day or two in town to see what I could do to help out.\u201d Jeanette sat on the sofa, mending the sleeve of one of the boys\u2019 shirts. Johnny lay beside her, his head on her lap and one arm hanging haphazardly over the edge of the cushions. \u201cBy the time I got here to the farm, Benny didn\u2019t seem to be bothered by it anymore. I should have known \u2013 of course he\u2019d be scared.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben looked at Johnny, half listening to the woman as she spoke. It was truly remarkable, the resemblance. He still couldn\u2019t bring himself to believe this child before him was real \u2013 and really his. He smiled inwardly at the foolishness of his fainting spell earlier that afternoon. It had been quite a shock, though. Twins. He blinked hard in bewilderment at this strange turn of events.<\/p>\n

At length, he shook the thought from his mind and turned his attention back to the conversation at hand. Jeanette and Joe had apparently given up on Ben\u2019s participation in the dialogue, and that suited Ben just fine. He was content to just sit and listen.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere was hardly anybody in New Orleans when Pa and I came through this morning.\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette nodded, \u201cYes, some left when they realized New Orleans was going to fall into Union hands \u2013 Some left out of fear and others left to go join the ranks of other Confederate regiments. Many were left with nothing after the Union soldiers came through.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHow is it that you and Genevieve didn\u2019t leave?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cTwo women with small two small children traveling through this area of the south isn\u2019t the smartest thing to do at the moment. Plus, Genevieve took ill again just after we arrived home\u2026 Besides,\u201d Jeanette smiled wryly, \u201cI have certain\u2026 connections\u2026 among a few of the higher ranking Union officers. They\u2019re content to let us alone \u2013 especially with us being way out here\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben allowed their voices to drift to the background again and let the rhythm of the rain pattering against the window take center stage. It seemed to drone sleepily on, like a relaxing percussive lullaby. Soon he found himself having to put forth a good deal of effort to keep his eyes open. He looked down at the boy in his lap. Benny had been overly clingy since finding out about the coming trip to New Orleans. Supper had been a rather dismal affair as Ben had had to get rather stern with the boy \u2013 insisting that he sit in his own chair at the table to eat his meal, and not in Ben\u2019s lap. Afterward, they\u2019d all retreated to the living room where Benny had once again sought refuge in Ben\u2019s arms.<\/p>\n

After the children had fallen asleep, Jeanette explained how Doc Ford had finally been able to find and bring back the doctor from Georgia. Apparently, he was now a surgeon for the Confederate Army and was granted leave just long enough for the quick trip to New Orleans. It had proven to be a bit of a chore sneaking him into the city without the knowledge of the Union soldiers.<\/p>\n

Ben felt a pang of fear in his stomach at what news the doctor might give them. He honestly didn\u2019t know what he would do if anything ever happened to Benny. He rubbed his large hand on the boy\u2019s back as he breathed a silent prayer.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026right, Pa? \u2026. Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben gave such a start that he wondered for a moment if he might have dozed off.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s that?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI said, Doc Martin\u2019s seen Benny a hundred times \u2013 he would have caught it if there was something wrong, right?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben shifted uncomfortably at the piercing stare of the green eyes before him. Joe had a look of worried hope on his face.<\/p>\n

Ben cleared his throat and offered a rather hollow smile. \u201cDoc Martin is a very good doctor, son.\u201d He held his breath, hoping Joe would accept the vague answer.<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s eyes traveled to Jeanette. \u201cAnd stop worrying, he\u2019ll do fine tomorrow.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBen, I just keep remembering what it was like when we arrived in New Orleans\u2026 no wonder he\u2019s terrified.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJeanette, if that\u2019s where the doctor he needs to see is, then he\u2019s going to have to go \u2013 whether he likes it or not.\u201d<\/p>\n

She gave a slight nod, though his words hadn\u2019t seemed to ease her worry much.<\/p>\n

Joe stood, stretching sleepily. \u201cYou want me to take him upstairs and put him in bed, Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded, handing the sleeping child over. Benny stirred slightly but then, apparently recognizing the new arms that held him, allowed himself to fall back to sleep.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes,\u201d Jeanette agreed, \u201cIt\u2019s past time for this one, too.\u201d<\/p>\n

She laid aside her sewing and reached down to lift Johnny.<\/p>\n

\u201cUh\u2026 here\u2026 how about I\u2026\u201d Ben began uncomfortably. This was his son, after all. It seemed strange to not offer to put him to bed.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh\u2026\u201d Jeanette looked up, suddenly understanding. \u201cYes, of course\u2026 first door on the left \u2013 next to Genevieve\u2019s.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded as he crossed the room to collect the boy into his arms. As he turned to mount the stairs, a grin spread over his face. This will definitely take some getting used to!<\/em><\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Joe sat back in his chair, trying not to worry about what the doctors might be discovering about his little brother in the next room. He glanced at the clock on the wall. It had already been twenty minutes since his father and Jeanette had taken Benny back to the examining room to see Dr. Ford and Dr. Smith.<\/p>\n

Suddenly, there was a loud thud, followed by a quiet announcement of \u201cwhoops.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI told you to leave that alone, Johnny,\u201d Joe said, exasperated. He reached across the six-year-old to apprehend the medical book the boy had dropped on the floor.<\/p>\n

Johnny gave a loud and bored sigh as he turned to sit back down. Joe rolled his eyes and replaced the book back on the desk, trying to make it look as if nothing had been touched.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s this?\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe cringed, not seeing and yet knowing the child had picked something else up \u2013 and with his luck, it would be something of great expense. He turned to find Johnny standing in front of a medical bag, instruments spread all around. How in the world did he make such a mess so quickly?<\/em> Joe\u2019s eyes widened in panic, as he realized the boy was inquiring about a sharp scalpel he held in his hand.<\/p>\n

\u201cJohnny!\u201d<\/p>\n

The boy started at the volume of Joe\u2019s voice causing his hand to let loose of the instrument. It fell to the floor with a clang, but not before nicking his hand.<\/p>\n

Both froze in their tracks. Johnny stared at the cut on his hand in shock, while Joe prepared for what he knew would be forthcoming. A moment later piercing scream filled the room. Joe lunged forward, kneeling on the ground in front of him.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, no\u2026p-please don\u2019t do that\u2026 it\u2019s alright\u2026.shh\u2026\u201d\u00a0 Joe held a finger to his lips as he glanced over his shoulder to see if anyone had heard the boy.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou scared me!\u201d The boy accused through teary sobs.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah \u2013 I know, I\u2019m sorry \u2013 just\u2026 just\u2026 stop crying\u2026 look, it\u2019s not a bad cut\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe pleaded with the boy to stop crying, but to no avail. Johnny\u2019s howling only got louder. Joe winced, knowing that any second everyone would come in from the examination room to see what all of the ruckus was about. He didn\u2019t relish the idea of having to tell them he couldn\u2019t handle one little boy by himself for a few minutes.<\/p>\n

He took out a handkerchief from his back pocket and tied it around Johnny\u2019s hand.<\/p>\n

\u201cAlright now\u2026\u201d he said quietly, picking the child up and giving him a few comforting pats on the back. \u201cThat\u2019s why I told you not to touch anything\u2026see?\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe could feel the boy\u2019s head nod in between whimpers.<\/p>\n

\u201cAlright let\u2019s sit down and have another look at that hand.\u201d<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Benny sat on the examining table, legs dangling far above the floor. Ben stood in the corner of the room as he watched Dr. Smith poke and prod at his son. He had to admit he was a little surprised that Benny was sitting so calmly by himself. From the time they had entered New Orleans, Benny had insisted on being held and hiding his face in his father\u2019s vest.<\/p>\n

\u201cAlright Benny,\u201d Dr. Smith said, giving the boy a pat on the knee, \u201cI want you to walk around the room now and then come back and let me listen to your heart again.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny gave a questioning glance toward Ben, then hopped off the table and did as he was instructed. The doctor pressed his stethoscope to the boy\u2019s ribcage then jotted down some things on a piece of paper. He turned back to Benny and tapped on his chest in various places as he listened again. He scribbled a few more notes then looked at them curiously as he scratched his head.<\/p>\n

\u201cDr. Ford\u2026 I see nothing in the world wrong with this child.\u201d<\/p>\n

Silence hung in the air for several moments as everyone wondered if they\u2019d just heard him correctly.<\/p>\n

Dr. Ford grabbed the stethoscope from the other man\u2019s hand. He listened for several seconds, mouth gaping open.<\/p>\n

\u201cThis\u2026 this just isn\u2019t possible\u2026\u201d He turned around to face Jeanette, \u201c\u2026There\u2019s no way this is the same child I examined six years ago\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben released the breath he hadn\u2019t realized he\u2019d been holding as he offered up a silent prayer of thanksgiving. He looked at Jeanette. The expression of confusion on her face seemed to mirror the look on his own.<\/p>\n

\u201cI assure you it is\u2026 I would know,\u201d she answered dryly.<\/p>\n

\u201cLook,\u201d Dr. Smith began with a scowl, \u201cI came from my post during a time of war to see to a desperately ill child\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI swear to you!\u201d Dr. Ford interrupted, \u201cThis child should not even be alive now! I remember holding him in my arms and examining him as an infant \u2013 this is nothing short of a\u2026a\u2026\u201d he paused searching for the right word. \u201c\u2026a miracle,\u201d he finished quietly, as though he wasn\u2019t sure he entirely believed in the word.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019d like to thank you again, Dr. Smith\u2026\u201d Ben began, but before he could completely offer his thanks, the doctor brushed past him in a huff, muttering something about \u201cfoolish shenanigans\u201d and \u201cdon\u2019t they know there\u2019s a war on.\u201d<\/p>\n

Shrugging at the man\u2019s comment, Ben took hold of Benny\u2019s hand and followed Jeanette and the doctors out of the examining room. When they entered the main office area, Benny wriggled his hand free from his father\u2019s and ran to Joe. He stopped a few steps short, staring in disgust.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat are you doing?\u201d Benny asked, rather demandingly.<\/p>\n

Joe gave him a little wink, ignoring his brother\u2019s rude tone. \u201cWell, waiting for you, of course.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo,\u201d Benny pointed to Johnny, who had made himself comfortable in Joe\u2019s lap and was currently nursing his still throbbing hand. \u201cI mean you<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n

Chapter 27 \u2013 Something Fishy Going On<\/strong><\/p>\n

In the days that followed their visit with the doctors, everyone on the Richardson farm seemed to settle into some semblance of a routine. In the mornings, Ben would take Benny and Johnny to visit with Genevieve while Jeanette busied herself in the kitchen preparing breakfast. Joe would use that time to do various chores that were nearly impossible to do with children underfoot.<\/p>\n

After breakfast the boys had chores to do, while Jeanette tended to Genevieve and Ben and Joe did what they could with the tobacco fields behind the house \u2013 knowing very little about farming, there was very little they could<\/em> do.\u00a0 Everyone would reunite for lunch in Genevieve\u2019s room. She seemed to benefit greatly from these interactions with the household, in spite of the obvious tension between her and Ben. When lunch was concluded the boys were free to go play until suppertime. After supper, Ben took the boys back up to Genevieve and then on to bed.<\/p>\n

Since their arrival a few weeks earlier, Genevieve\u2019s health had not seemed to get any worse. Though, it certainly had not gotten any better. She would wake up several times a night, unable to breathe well or with horrible chest pains. A few times she had not eaten much or had refused a meal altogether. Ben often found himself wondering when and how he should tell the boys that she was dying. As it turned out, Johnny brought the subject up, relieving Ben of the uncomfortable duty of approaching the morbid topic.<\/p>\n

Ben had taken the boys to the creek for an afternoon of fishing. They sat on a grassy ledge that hung over the water and he listened as the boys chattered on and asked question upon endless question. Ben would patiently answer each inquiry, at the same time reminding them to keep their hooks in the water and to be sure not to drop their poles.<\/p>\n

\u201cHow come you live on the Ponner-dosa?\u201d Johnny began, squinting against the sun as he looked up at Ben.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell,\u201d Ben shrugged slightly, \u201cThat\u2019s just where our ranch is… the Ponderosa<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd Benny lived there all\u2019a his life?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded and fervently wanted to add, \u201cthat is until he was taken away,\u201d but didn\u2019t.<\/p>\n

\u201cAn\u2019 I have a horse named Ol\u2019 Blue and a dog named Chief!\u201d Benny added excitedly, nearly dropping his pole into the water.<\/p>\n

Johnny stared at the water for a few moments then looked at Ben again.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny and me are brothers\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded, pulling his hook out of the water to outfit it with another worm to replace the one that had been nibbled off.<\/p>\n

\u201cAn\u2019 Joe\u2019s Benny\u2019s brother too\u2026\u201d Ben nodded again, \u201c\u2026 so is Joe my brother?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben took a deep breath, knowing where the boy was heading with this. He kept his eyes fixed on the water ahead of them and tossed his hook out again.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, Joe is your brother \u2013 and so are Adam and Hoss,\u201d he explained, quite sure the latter two names meant nothing to the six-year-old as he\u2019d never met them before.<\/p>\n

\u201cAn\u2019 you\u2019re my Pa\u2026\u201d Johnny kept his eyes focused on Ben, who nodded again. \u201c\u2026so\u2026 how come you live on the Pod \u2013 Podder-nosa?\u201d He repeated his question from before, crinkling his nose in confusion.<\/p>\n

Ben pursed his lips, searching for the right words. He was painfully aware of both boys\u2019 eyes fixed upon him.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, Johnny, it\u2019s\u2026 it\u2019s a bit complicated, really\u2026\u201d Ben fumbled the words out. At length, he turned and with a forced smile, ruffled the boy\u2019s hair. \u201cAll that really matters now is that we\u2019re all together. As we should be.\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny nodded, apparently accepting the answer. Just then Benny\u2019s pole bobbed up and down a few times.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny, you caught one!\u201d<\/p>\n

In no time all of them were on their feet helping Benny pull in his fish. And for several moments it was all tugging and whooping and splashing and giggling. At last, the fish was ashore and Benny, completely soaked, held it up proudly.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, can I take it to Aunt Jeanette?\u201d He asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, Benny, don\u2019t you want to wait and see if we catch some more? We can take them all back at the same time\u2026\u201d Ben explained, smiling at his son\u2019s impatience.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh please, Pa. I can also show Joe while I\u2019m there.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, all right, you remember how to get back, right?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny nodded and, without another word, took off running toward the house.<\/p>\n

Ben shook his head and gave a little chuckle as he turned back to his fishing spot. Johnny had already sat down and tossed his hook back out into the water. Ben cleared his throat uncomfortably as he looked around. He and Johnny hadn\u2019t really been alone until this moment. He settled himself on the grass once again and resolved to take advantage of this opportunity.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo, Johnny\u2026 where were we?\u201d<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

\u201cI tell ya, Adam, all those cattle drives we been on I always thought I\u2019d pay an arm an\u2019 a leg to not have to travel that far on horseback,\u201d Hoss commented as he stretched his aching muscles, \u201c\u2026 but a week by train and another week by stage has just given me a whole new \u2018preciation for keepin\u2019 my back side in ol\u2019 Chubb\u2019s saddle!\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam grinned and pointed to Hoss\u2019s stomach. \u201cYeah, well I think Chubb might disagree with you on that, BIG Brother!\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss laughed, scratching his head, \u201cWell, you might be right at that!\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss shifted in the saddle to a more comfortable position. The horses they had rented to get from New Orleans to the Marceau estate weren\u2019t animals that he\u2019d have paid a wooden nickel for if they hadn\u2019t been in such a hurry. As it were, they found themselves willing to take anything with four legs and a pulse. He shifted again, certain that the saddles here were made a good deal smaller than those back home. Even so, he didn\u2019t dwell on the thought; he was just happy to be out of the stuffy confines of the train and off the bumpy, dusty stage.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey look,\u201d Adam said as he pointed to a farmhouse in the distance, \u201cthat must be it.\u201d<\/p>\n

The two kicked their horses into a lope, both feeling a pang of excitement at the coming surprise reunion. As they neared the house, an overalled figure came into view: a boy, running toward the house, carrying a fish on a bit of fishing line.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny!!\u201d Hoss shouted, kicking his horse to move a little faster. \u201cHey, Adam, it\u2019s Benny!\u201d<\/p>\n

Soon, they were in the front yard and off their horses. Benny stood frozen in his tracks, staring with a look of astonishment on his face. A moment later his fish was falling to the ground and he was rushing toward them.<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss! Adam!\u201d<\/p>\n

Both took their turn pulling their youngest brother into a warm embrace.<\/p>\n

\u201cHow did ya\u2019ll get here?\u201d Benny asked when at last the hugs and kisses had ended.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, now that\u2019s a silly question,\u201d Adam, who was holding Benny, offered Hoss a sly wink. \u201cYou just saw us ride up, didn\u2019t you?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou rode here all the way from the Ponderosa?!\u201d Benny\u2019s mouth gaped open at the thought.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, not exactly\u2026 I made Hoss carry me for most of the trip, but he threw a shoe, so we had to get some real horses.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny regarded his brothers skeptically, trying to decide if Adam was teasing. When his brothers broke into laughter, he decided they were, in fact, joking. And it was a good thing because, in Benny\u2019s thinking, they would have looked entirely silly gallivanting across the country piggy-back.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, I see ya caught ya a fish\u2026\u201d Hoss crossed the yard, to retrieve the fish from the dirt. He let out a whistle and held it up for Adam to see. \u201cWill ya look at the size of that thing!\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny grinned broadly and then gasped suddenly. \u201cOh yeah! I was \u2018posed to take that in to Aunt Jeanette!\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny jumped from Adam\u2019s arms and confiscated the fish from Hoss. He ran a few steps toward the house then turned back slowly to his brothers, a look of worry washing over his face.<\/p>\n

Hoss stepped forwarded and gave the boy\u2019s shoulder an understanding squeeze. \u201cIt\u2019s alright, we ain\u2019t goin\u2019 no where. We\u2019re gonna put our horses up and we\u2019ll be in directly.\u201d<\/p>\n

He flashed them a toothy grin then took off running into the house.<\/p>\n

The two men stood there for several seconds, silently staring after him.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s grown\u2026\u201d Hoss said at last, a hint of sadness in his voice.<\/p>\n

Adam nodded then clapped his brother on the back. \u201cLet\u2019s go put the horses up.\u201d<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

\u201cWill I ever get to go to the Ponna-doser?\u201d Johnny asked. He held his fishing hook in one hand and a worm in the other. He fumbled with the two for a while until at last he managed to get the worm on the hook. He tossed the line into the water and looked up at Ben.<\/p>\n

\u201cSure, you will, Johnny, and you\u2019ll learn to ride a horse and be a real rancher,\u201d Ben said with a wink.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut when?\u201d<\/p>\n

The smile disappeared from Ben\u2019s face. \u201cSoon, Johnny\u2026soon.\u201d\u00a0 But felt a lump rise in his throat.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou mean when Mama goes to heaven?\u201d Johnny looked back up at Ben, his face serious.<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s heart sank. \u201cYes, Johnny \u2013 when your mama goes\u2026\u201d he trailed off, his throat constricting. \u201cYes\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo\u2026\u201d Johnny began slowly, \u201c\u2026 can I call you \u2018Pa\u2019 like Benny and Joe do?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben smiled, the pain in his heart subsiding. He knew the question would come up sooner or later. These past weeks the boy had managed to get by without calling him anything.<\/p>\n

\u201cI think I\u2019d like that, Johnny,\u201d Ben said, ruffling the boy\u2019s hair.<\/p>\n

\u201cCan I really? I never got to call no one that before\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben frowned. If he\u2019d done what he wanted, he would have gathered the boy in his arms and told him how sorry he was; that if he\u2019d known about him, he would have gone to the ends of the earth to find him and be there for every minute of his life; that he\u2019d have been there to hear every word, see every accomplishment and dry every tear. But he did not have his way, and it would do no good to tell the boy right now about the circumstances that had made his life what it was.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026Mr. Richardson didn\u2019t want me to call him nothin\u2019 like that\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben wished now that he\u2019d let Genevieve explain her recent marriage when she\u2019d tried to a few weeks ago. From what he\u2019d gathered in passing comments from Jeanette and Johnny, Richardson had joined the Confederate Army. What\u2019s more is he\u2019d taken the few slaves he owned with him to join the fight. Ben had to wonder at a man who would leave his sick wife and son (even a stepson) with no help.<\/p>\n

\u201cWas Mr. Richardson\u2026\u201d Ben began, trying to keep his temper even, \u201c\u2026was he good to you?\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny shrugged at the question. \u201cHe didn\u2019t really like me to talk to him none\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Suddenly there was a great splashing in the water.<\/p>\n

\u201cI caught one!!\u201d Johnny was already pulling the line in before Ben realized what was happening.<\/p>\n

\u201cCan I take mine up to the house and show Aunt Jeanette too?!\u201d he asked, his eyes full of excitement.<\/p>\n

Ben gave a deep laugh, \u201cSure \u2013 and find out what\u2019s happened to Benny, he\u2019s had time to get there and back by now.\u201d<\/p>\n

He watched the boy run off, fish still flopping on the end of his line. He had a sneaking suspicion the boys weren\u2019t coming back. If he knew Jeanette, she would be taking the opportunity to spoil them with cookies or something of that sort. He leaned back and decided that he might rather enjoy the alone time. Besides, the two fish the boys had caught would hardly feed the household. So, in his thinking, someone had to stay and catch supper!<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

\u201cNow, I ask you Hoss, did you ever see such a workin\u2019 fool?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I must say, that workin\u2019 fool looks a might familiar, don\u2019t ya think?\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe froze in mid-swing of his pitchfork at the familiar voices. He turned, a grin spreading across his face.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam! Hoss! What in the world are you two doing here?!\u201d He dropped the tool and crossed the barn to give them each a hearty handshake.<\/p>\n

Adam shrugged playfully, \u201cOh, all the cows ran off and the hands got drunk, so we just decided to take ourselves a little vacation.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss\u2019s laughter thundered through the barn, sending a few nearby chickens scattering.<\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s grin deepened, he\u2019d missed that laugh. \u201cWell, you just laugh now, but when Pa finds out you two are here and no one\u2019s back at the Ponderosa well\u2026\u201d He clucked his tongue a few times at them.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo, how is Pa doing?\u201d Adam asked quietly, his face sobering.<\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s smile faded quickly. \u201cHe\u2019s alright I suppose. I think he\u2019s having a really hard time dealing with the idea that Genevieve is dying\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe saw the look of shock in his brothers\u2019 eyes and remembered they hadn\u2019t known about Genevieve\u2019s illness.<\/p>\n

\u201cDying\u2026?\u201d Hoss echoed in disbelief.<\/p>\n

Joe nodded. \u201cPa\u2019s pretty upset with her about all the stuff that she did, but I think\u2026 well\u2026\u201d\u00a0 Joe lowered his head sadly.<\/p>\n

Adam put a comforting hand on his brother\u2019s shoulder. \u201cJoe, it\u2019s not exactly a secret that Pa still loves her \u2013 even if he is mad at her.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam\u2019s right Little Joe,\u201d Hoss said, his voice even, \u201cEverybody knows how he still feels \u2018bout her. Don\u2019t mean it makes no sense, but we gotta respect it. A man cain\u2019t help who he loves, I reckon.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe nodded. His brothers apparently thought he didn\u2019t want his father to love Genevieve. And, for the time being, he was fine allowing them to think that. In truth, however, he was concerned about their father having to go through losing another love. Three times was unthinkable for any man. But four? Why couldn\u2019t she just get better, and everything go back to being the way it was before she had left them?<\/p>\n

Adam gave Joe\u2019s shoulder a little shake. \u201cCome on, let\u2019s get these horses put away so we can go find Pa. We might as well take our beating and get it over with, right?\u201d He offered a smile and a wink then turned to unsaddle his horse.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Johnny held his fish proudly as he trotted into the yard, wet overalls clinging to his body. He had just passed the barn on his way to the house when he heard voices. Curious, he decided to take a detour to go investigate. He peered into the barn. Joe was leaning against a stall conversing with two men who were unsaddling horses. One of the men, dressed all in black, was talking \u2013 something about an uncomfortable train ride. The other man, Johnny determined, was the biggest man he\u2019d ever seen. He looked back at Joe, noting the smile on his face, and decided these must be welcome visitors. Lately \u2013 since the war had started \u2013 it seemed like most visitors were not welcome. He didn\u2019t know what made these strangers different from anyone else, but he liked Joe and knew he could trust him. So, he walked in, holding up his fish with a large grin on his face.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell look at that!\u201d Joe exclaimed at his entrance.<\/p>\n

\u201cI just caught it \u2013 ain\u2019t it a big one Joe?\u201d Johnny said proudly.<\/p>\n

\u201cSure is!\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny noted the two men approaching him with looks of curiosity on their faces. The big one scratched his head while the one in black put his hands on his hips.<\/p>\n

\u201cAin\u2019t you gone to give that to Jeanette yet?\u201d the big one asked.<\/p>\n

Johnny shrugged, not seeing what the big hurry was to take the fish to his aunt. He looked back at Joe, questioning. Joe seemed to be trying not to laugh \u2013 at what he wasn\u2019t sure. Grown-ups were certainly a strange sort, he decided. He dismissed the thought and turned to leave.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh hey,\u201d Joe called after him, \u201cwhy don\u2019t you bring out a couple of glasses of lemonade, they\u2019ve been riding hard all day.\u201d Joe motioned to the strangers who had now gone back to tending their horses.<\/p>\n

Johnny nodded and left the barn.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Benny shoved the last of a cookie into his mouth as he recanted the story of how he\u2019d caught his fish to his aunt. He was interrupted by the sound of the kitchen door opening.<\/p>\n

\u201cJohnny! You caught one too!\u201d Benny hopped from his chair to go see his brother\u2019s fish. The two chattered excitedly about it until Jeanette apprehended the fish to go clean it.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s some men in the barn with Joe\u2026\u201d Johnny said.<\/p>\n

Benny\u2019s eyes widened with excitement. \u201cOh yeah!!\u201d Without another word, he was out the door.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Hoss yawned as he led his horse into an empty stall. A nap sure sounded good after that long ride. He sighed in disappointment. There likely wouldn\u2019t be time for a nap. He had a feeling their discussion with Pa would wind up being a lengthy one. He yawned again, deciding that a cup of strong coffee might be in order to help get him through the day.<\/p>\n

\u201cI should probably go tell Jeanette you two are here. She\u2019d have my head if she didn\u2019t know to make enough food for supper.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss nodded and gave a slight wave to Joe. \u201cYeah, we\u2019ll be in directly \u2013 just gotta feed and water the horses.\u201d<\/p>\n

He gathered an armful of hay and tossed it into the feeding trough. Turning, he saw Benny coming in.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, little man, what\u2019cha doin?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny ran up to him, giggling, and practically leapt into his arms. Hoss\u2019s heart melted as the boy laid his head on his shoulder. It was nice to know that some things hadn\u2019t changed \u2013 Benny was still as affectionate as ever.<\/p>\n

Adam emerged from the corner of the barn, having just put his own horse away. He poked Benny in the side, making the boy double over with laughter. \u201cHey, where\u2019s that lemonade you promised us?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny raised his head, a look of confusion on his face.<\/p>\n

\u201cHuh?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, hey,\u201d Hoss said, changing the subject excitedly, \u201cwe brung ya somethin\u2019!\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss set Benny on the ground and retrieved his saddlebag from where it hung on a stall gate. He reached in and pulled out a small cloth bag. He handed it to Benny, who opened it with a gasp.<\/p>\n

\u201cMarbles! Thanks Hoss!!\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam grinned and cleared his throat loudly.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou too Adam!\u201d He clutched the sack of marble in his fist as he ran over to give Adam a hug.<\/p>\n

Adam picked the boy up and threw him over his shoulder and gave his backside a few firm pats. \u201cThat\u2019ll teach you to forget me!\u201d He lowered the squirming and giggling Benny to his waist. \u201cNow don\u2019t you lose those, okay?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny nodded, promising to take \u201creal good care of them.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam lowered him to the ground and ruffled his hair. \u201cAfter dinner I\u2019ll show you how to play, okay?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh boy! I\u2019m gonna take\u2019em inside and look at\u2019em!\u201d<\/p>\n

With that, Benny was out the door, leaving his brothers alone in the barn.<\/p>\n

Hoss looked around. \u201cWell, are we \u2018bout done in here?\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam nodded. \u201cLet\u2019s get on in the house and find that lemonade for ourselves.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSounds good,\u201d Hoss laughed as they headed for the door.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Adam and Hoss walked sheepishly into the house. No one had answered their knock at the door. Walking through the living room, they heard voices coming from the back of the house. They took their hats off as they entered the kitchen.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam! Hoss!\u201d Jeanette greeted them warmly.<\/p>\n

\u201cSorry \u2013 em \u2013 we knocked, but no one answered, so we just came in\u2026\u201d Adam explained.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, you ought to know better than that!\u201d She laughed, rolling her eyes at his formality. \u201cI\u2019ve just been giving the boys some cookies, would you two care for some? \u2013 With coffee for the adults, of course, not milk.\u201d She didn\u2019t wait for their answers. Instead, she busied herself setting two more places at the table.<\/p>\n

Hoss and Adam looked at each other apprehensively then sat at the table with their brothers. Joe sat across from them with what looked to them to be a very sneaky grin on his face.<\/p>\n

Adam turned his attention to the six-year-old sitting next to him. \u201cI thought you were gonna go play with your marbles\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny looked up at Adam, furrowing his brow. He shot a questioning glance at Joe who answered with a muffled laugh and a shrug.<\/p>\n

\u201cHuh? I ain\u2019t got no marbles,\u201d he said crinkling his nose.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou didn\u2019t lose\u2019em already did ya? After what Adam done told ya \u2018bout keepin\u2019 up with\u2019em?\u201d Hoss\u2019s voice held a hint of scolding.<\/p>\n

Johnny bowed his back stubbornly at the accusation. \u201cHe didn\u2019t say nuthin\u2019 – an\u2019 I ain\u2019t never had no marbles! But I think you done lost yers all right!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYoung man, that will be quite enough from you!\u201d Jeanette wagged a finger in the boy\u2019s face. \u201cYou may go to your room!\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe, still grinning, stood. \u201cI\u2019ll take him up, Jeanette,\u201d he offered.<\/p>\n

As they left, Johnny mumbled something about \u201cit\u2019s just not fair\u201d while Joe let out a rather shrill giggle.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow what do you suppose that was all about?\u201d Adam asked, his face reflecting his concern.<\/p>\n

Jeanette shrugged, \u201cOh, he\u2019s all right \u2013 he just has to get used to ya\u2019ll.\u201d<\/p>\n

The men looked at her in disbelief. Get used to them? Where did she think Benny had been for the first six years of his life? They were just about to voice their concern when the kitchen door opened again. Benny walked in, holding a bright blue marble between his thumb and index finger.<\/p>\n

\u201cLook at this one!!\u201d he announced to no one in particular.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow, what\u2019s this?\u201d Jeanette greeted him with a smile. Hoss and Adam looked on in complete shock.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam and Hoss gave me a whole big ol\u2019 bag of\u2019em. This one\u2019s my favorite.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAs well it should be!\u201d She admired the marble in his hand. \u201cNow, go put them away and get me some firewood, please.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny nodded and left to do as he had been told.<\/p>\n

Adam and Hoss continued to stare at Jeanette, mouths now gaping open. She\u2019d just sent the boy to his room, and now it was perfectly fine for him to come trapsing in here as though he hadn\u2019t just been in trouble? A second time they opened their mouths to question her, and a second time they were interrupted by the opening of the kitchen door. Joe entered, leading Johnny by the hand.<\/p>\n

\u201cGo ahead,\u201d Joe prompted the boy.<\/p>\n

\u201cM\u2019sorry\u2026\u201d He directed the mumbled apology toward Adam and Hoss.<\/p>\n

Hoss and Adam smiled, accepting the apology for his strange outburst earlier. Adam held out his arms to the boy. Johnny stared at him sheepishly. Adam leaned forward and pulled Johnny onto his lap.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou expectin\u2019 someone else?\u201d Johnny asked, legs dangling above the floor.<\/p>\n

Adam shrugged. \u201cNo, why?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019as just wonderin\u2019 why we\u2019as sittin\u2019 like this.\u201d He pointed to the other empty seats around.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s it!\u201d Hoss stood up and pulled the boy from Adam. \u201cSomethin\u2019s goin\u2019 on here \u2013 you feelin\u2019 all right?\u201d Hoss put a hand on the child\u2019s forehead.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m fine \u2013 are you<\/em> feelin\u2019 alright,\u201d Johnny asked skeptically.<\/p>\n

Hoss looked at Adam and frowned then looked up at Jeanette, who stared at him peculiarly. Suddenly feeling a little self-conscious and thoroughly confused, he put the boy down and patted him on the head.<\/p>\n

Johnny skipped back over to Joe and pronounced himself ready to go back to the creek to fish. Joe took the boy\u2019s hand and led him from the kitchen, but not before flashing his brothers another sly grin.<\/p>\n

\u201cSomethin\u2019 funny\u2019s goin\u2019 on,\u201d Hoss whispered, \u201cAn\u2019 I gotta hunch Little Joe\u2019s at the center of it.\u201d Adam nodded in agreement.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Ben inspected the string of fish he\u2019d managed to catch. That should just about do it<\/em>, he thought proudly. He gathered the fishing poles and, resting them on his shoulder, he set off toward the house. He took his time, enjoying the cool breeze that brought some relief from the hot summer sun.<\/p>\n

He had just reached the road that led to the house when he saw Benny \u2013 or was it Johnny? \u2013 half skipping, half running toward him. As the boy neared, Ben recognized it to be Johnny. Telling them apart had gotten easier over the last two weeks as he\u2019d noticed the differences in their appearance, personality, and mannerisms.<\/p>\n

\u201cHi Johnny,\u201d Ben greeted him with a smile, \u201cI was beginning to think you two weren\u2019t coming back.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHey! Look at all them fish you caught!\u201d Johnny said in awe.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019d better hurry and get these to your aunt if we\u2019re going to have them for supper.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben handed the fish off to the boy and smiled as he felt Johnny\u2019s hand slip into his own. The two walked silently for a good ways. Ben allowed his thoughts to drift aimlessly from one thing to another. It was such a lazy summer day \u2013 what with the gentle breeze and the fishing and nothing that really needed doing right away. The locusts were trilling in the trees and the air held the faintest scent of honeysuckle. A lazy day was a welcome break from the stress of the last few months. He could think about anything or nothing at all, if he had a mind to. And at the moment, the latter was what suited him just fine.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s some men at the house\u2026\u201d Johnny commented, pulling Ben from his non-thoughts.<\/p>\n

Ben cocked his head in concern. \u201cMen? What men?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI dunno, one\u2019s dressed in all black and the other\u2019s a great big fella.\u201d Johnny shrugged, unconcerned. \u201cThey\u2019re kinda a strange sort. I think they might be crazy,\u201d he ended matter-of-factly.<\/p>\n

Ben mulled over Johnny\u2019s description of the men, his mind forming the image of two very familiar people.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026couldn\u2019t be\u2026\u201d he muttered and picked up his pace, fairly dragging Johnny behind him.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

\u201cDadburnit, Joe, answer me!\u201d Hoss\u2019s eyebrows were lowered evenly over his eyes as he yelled at his brother.<\/p>\n

\u201cI did answer you!\u201d Joe said, his voice taking on a rather shrill timbre as he defended himself.<\/p>\n

Adam looked at him skeptically, running a hand over his chin. \u201cYou mean to tell me you didn\u2019t notice anything strange about Benny\u2019s behavior?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, that is exactly what I\u2019m saying!\u201d Joe crossed his arms in front of his chest, giving them a sly grin.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, we noticed it dadgummit and we wanna know what\u2019s the matter with\u2019im! And by-golly Joe, I think you know somethin\u2019 about it. Now ya better start talkin\u2019!\u201d Hoss reached out and snatched Joe up by the shirt collar. He was halted by Adam\u2019s hand on his arm.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow Hoss\u2026 If Little Brother here says there\u2019s nothing wrong with Benny, well\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss looked incredulously at Adam. Surely he could see Joe was not telling them the whole truth. The little scamp had that look on his face that he always got when he had something up his sleeve.<\/p>\n

While Hoss was side-tracked by Adam\u2019s comment, Joe took the opportunity to squirm out of his brother\u2019s grip. He moved quickly to stand behind Adam, deciding his oldest brother was his best bet for protection at the moment.<\/p>\n

\u201cH-H-Hoss, I said there\u2019s nothing in the world wrong with Benny\u2026<\/em> a-a-and that\u2019s the truth!\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam offered a rather fake smile to Joe, smoothing out the wrinkles in his shirt where Hoss had taken hold of him. \u201cOf course, Joe\u2026 we believe you\u2026\u201d He patted Joe on the head as though he were a little kid again. \u201cNow, if you\u2019ll excuse us, we\u2019re going to go find Pa\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss followed Adam out of the house, staring at him in disbelief.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam!\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam rolled his eyes and sighed in exasperation. \u201cHoss, he\u2019s obviously trying to pull something over on us. We just have to figure out how to beat him at his own game\u2026 But first we gotta find Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n

A grin spread across Hoss\u2019s face. For as much as he was worried about Benny – and was irritated at Joe – it was nice to see that life still had some <\/em>degree of normalcy. For as long as he could remember Joe\u2019s mission in life had been to try and pull a fast one on their older brother. Likewise, Adam almost always succeeded in proving the task impossible. Hoss couldn\u2019t remember the last time his brothers had gone through this little ritual, but he\u2019d certainly missed it. Perhaps life would be able to get back to normal after all. Hoss picked up his pace, his heart feeling a little lighter. God bless that deceitful younger brother of theirs!<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Adam and Hoss had barely reached the dusty road that led from the Marceau home when they saw two familiar figures coming towards them.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, there\u2019s Pa,\u201d Hoss commented a tad nervously.<\/p>\n

Adam nodded, slowing his pace then finally coming to a complete halt. He frowned. Their father looked a bit irritated. And with their little brother walking alongside of him, that could only mean that Pa already knew they were there.<\/p>\n

It might have been a funny sight \u2013 their father walking swiftly with long, purposeful strides and their little brother being half dragged by the hand, his little legs running to keep up \u2013 were it not for the expression on their father\u2019s face. As the pair approached them, they could hear a small voice whining, \u201cPa, I can\u2019t go that fast\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHi Pa!\u201d Adam offered, a little overly cheery.<\/p>\n

Hoss smiled and waved, trying desperately to act as casual as possible. The scowl on their Pa\u2019s face made it nearly impossible, though.<\/p>\n

Ben stopped a few paces away from them. Johnny, glad to finally have a rest, was panting from their brisk run-walk.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow\u2026\u201d Adam laughed uncomfortably, \u201cyou\u2019re probably wondering what we\u2019re doing here\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben said nothing, he simply cocked his head slightly, waiting for one of them to explain.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, ya see\u2026\u201d Adam began then turned to Hoss with a frown, suddenly wondering why he<\/em> was volunteering to do the explaining. He gave Hoss\u2019s arm a slap with the back of his hand. \u201cThis was all your idea \u2013 you<\/em> tell him!\u201d<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Joe looked out the window at the front of the house. He could see his brothers talking with their father. It seemed to be going well. Perhaps Pa wasn\u2019t as angry with Adam and Hoss as they thought he might be.\u00a0 He smiled, thinking of how they would react when they found out about Johnny. His grin gave way to a giggle as he remembered the last hour and the confusion his \u201cpoor\u201d older brothers had been put through. He hadn\u2019t intended for any of that to happen \u2013 it just did. And once it did, he found it rather amusing to stand by and watch them grow increasingly flustered. Of course, he\u2019d done nothing to straighten things out for them.<\/p>\n

He was kneeling on the sofa, elbows resting on the back with one hand drawing the curtain to one side. He nearly fell off when a tiny finger poking at his back startled him.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019cha doin\u2019 Joe?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t you know not to sneak up on someone like that?\u201d Joe scolded, more out of embarrassment than anger.<\/p>\n

Benny\u2019s eyes grew wide and a little teary. \u201cM\u2019sorry, Joe \u2013 I didn\u2019t mean nuthin\u2019\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe stood, giving his brother a nudge. \u201cHey, how about we go see Pa and Adam and Hoss, huh?\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe tossed his brother over his shoulder like a bag of feed, extracting a giggle from Benny. \u201cAnd while we\u2019re at it, we\u2019ll give Adam and Hoss the surprise of their life\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLet\u2019s hope they take it better\u2019n Pa did!\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny laughed, his body still halved over Joe\u2019s shoulder.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey sure thought I\u2019as crazy!\u201d he said with a giggle.<\/p>\n

Joe stopped suddenly. \u201cWhy you little\u2026\u201d Joe lowered the boy to his waist and looked him square in the eye. \u201c\u2026You knew all along?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny grinned, \u201cDid you see the looks on their faces?\u201d<\/p>\n

The two broke out into laughter. When they finally got control of themselves, Joe set his brother on the ground and led him to the door. \u201cI see I taught you well\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Chapter 28 \u2013 The Green-eyed Monster<\/strong>Ben leaned back in his chair at the dinner table, feeling contentedly full. He looked around at the seven people crowded around the small table and almost laughed. He\u2019d been irritated earlier when he found out that Adam and Hoss had gone against his wishes by coming to New Orleans, but he couldn\u2019t really blame them. He looked at Benny and mused at a six-year-old\u2019s ability to completely capture the hearts of three such \u201cmanly\u201d men. He was the center of their world and that suited Benny just fine.<\/p>\n

Ben caught Hoss and Adam stealing another glance at Johnny, as they\u2019d done periodically throughout the meal. He smiled inwardly at how they\u2019d reacted when they\u2019d heard the news. Adam, who was known for his even keel in all circumstances, had stood staring at the boys with his mouth gaping open. It was a good five minutes before he found his voice. Hoss, however, could only laugh \u2013 that loud raucous laughter he got when he was really tickled at something. When the initial shock had worn off and the six had begun making their way back to the house, Hoss and Adam saw to it that Joe found his way into the nearest water trough. Ben smirked, almost laughing at the image. They hadn\u2019t told him what Joe had done, but he had a feeling he could make a pretty good guess at it.<\/p>\n

Ben gave a long, quiet sigh. This had been a pretty good day – all things considered. He felt like he\u2019d made headway with getting to know Johnny a little better and his whole family had been at last reunited. The only thing that could have made him happier would have been to have them all together on the Ponderosa. His mind turned sadly to the circumstances that delayed their homecoming. Why couldn\u2019t things be as they were supposed to be? Why couldn\u2019t things have turned out differently? He dismissed the thought, unwilling to think on it anymore.<\/p>\n

He brought his attention back to the conversation going on at the table before him. It wasn\u2019t so much a conversation really, as it was Benny talking at his brothers. He\u2019d been talking excitedly for a good while now and had hardly touched his food. Ben didn\u2019t really feel like he should scold him for it. He\u2019d gone so long without seeing his brothers and was apparently determined to catch up on the lost time in the span of one short meal.<\/p>\n

Johnny leaned toward him and quietly asked, \u201cAre we going up to see Mama after dinner, Pa?\u201d Johnny blushed slightly, still a little shy about referring to Ben as \u201cPa.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben was just about to answer the boy when he realized Benny had halted his chatter mid-sentence. Benny\u2019s head turned slowly to his twin, his eyes wide in shock.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat<\/em> did you call him?\u201d<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Ben sat heavily in the wing-back chair next to Genevieve\u2019s bed. Johnny clamored atop the mass of quilts and pillows to be next to her. Ben looked down to find Benny clumsily lifting his father\u2019s heavy, booted foot to lay it across his opposite knee. The boy then disappeared below Ben\u2019s legs and reappeared between his legs.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, you\u2019ve trapped yourself now\u2026\u201d Ben said, crossing his legs more tightly so that the boy couldn\u2019t move.<\/p>\n

Benny giggled and squirmed his way free. As Benny turned to crawl up into his lap, Ben noticed Johnny staring at them. The boy was conversing quietly with his mother, but his eyes held fast to his father and brother. Ben sighed inwardly. This was starting to become a bit of a problem. He\u2019d managed to resolve the would-be conflict at dinner, but he knew Benny was not dealing well with having to share his father and brothers. For that matter, he wasn\u2019t sure that Johnny was necessarily willing to share his mother \u2013 but hadn\u2019t been nearly as vocal about it. Ben ran a hand over his face, resolving to speak to the boys about it the next day \u2013 before things got any worse.<\/p>\n

\u201cSomething wrong Ben?\u201d Ben\u2019s head lifted quickly at the sound of Genevieve\u2019s voice.<\/p>\n

\u201cHm? \u2013 Oh, no\u2026\u201d\u00a0 He knew she could see right through his lie, but he was too tired to care.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam and Hoss came today!\u201d Benny blurted out excitedly to his mother.<\/p>\n

\u201cDid they now?\u201d She smiled at Ben.<\/p>\n

Ben answered with a faint smile of his own and a nod, affirming the boy\u2019s statement.<\/p>\n

Benny and Johnny went on to explain \u2013 it was really more like talking over one another \u2013 about how Adam and Hoss had discovered their newest brother. Ben had to laugh at their version \u2013 not quite an accurate accounting, but amusing all the same and, no doubt, quite confusing for Genevieve. When they finished the retelling of the day\u2019s events and after a bit of a lull in the conversation, Benny climbed down from Ben\u2019s lap. Retrieving the Bible from the dresser, he presented it to his father.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, will you read the story again?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAlright\u2026\u201d Ben accepted the book, opening it to the end of Genesis. The boys made themselves comfortable on the bed, Genevieve in between them with an arm around each.<\/p>\n

In his resonant bass voice, he read the familiar words. He read of Israel\u2019s love for his son Joseph and of Joseph\u2019s brothers selling him into slavery and of all the terrible things that followed and of Joseph being reunited with his father and brothers and forgiving them because God had used their sin to bring about many good things. When the story was concluded, Ben closed the Bible and placed it on the nightstand.<\/p>\n

\u201cI just thought of somethin\u2019, Pa\u2026\u201d Benny began, \u201cWasn\u2019t Joseph\u2019s pa mad at Joseph\u2019s brothers for doin\u2019 what they done to\u2019im?\u201d Benny continued, not waiting for an answer, \u201c\u2026But he didn\u2019t seem like he was mad at\u2019em. Maybe he forgave\u2019em just like Joseph\u2026 That seems like a mighty nice thing to do, after what they done\u2026Don\u2019t ya think?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben could feel the color rising in his cheeks and ears. Though he didn\u2019t look at her, he knew Genevieve was watching him, hopeful. He set his jaw stubbornly, his face lowering into a scowl.<\/p>\n

\u201cI think it\u2019s time you went to bed,\u201d he said firmly.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut Pa\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI said go to bed.\u201d He didn\u2019t yell, but his tone was not one that allowed for any argument.<\/p>\n

Ben turned to look out of the window. The sun had set a good long while ago, but there was still just the faintest trace of light left on the horizon. He heard the boys quietly slip down from the bed and make their way to the door. He turned, his face softening slightly.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll be there in a minute to tuck you in\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

He turned back to the window and looked out again. In the distance, he could just make out a few boats paddling their way down the Mississippi. He pondered what it might be like to be on one of those boats, making his way to anywhere but here.<\/p>\n

He could feel Genevieve continuing to look at him. He knew she wanted him to say something. What\u2019s more, he knew exactly what she wanted him to say. He huffed, turning quickly to leave the room.<\/p>\n

\u201cBen\u2026\u201d Genevieve called after him, a hint of desperation in her voice.<\/p>\n

Ben paused, gripping the doorknob tightly. \u201cNo, Gen\u2026\u201d With that, he left the room, pulling the door closed behind him.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Ben stepped quietly into the boys\u2019 bedroom. The early morning sun was just beginning to peek through the windows. Two beds stood in front of him, topped with tangled sheets and night-shirted little boys. Johnny was lying on his stomach, one arm and one leg hanging precariously over the edge of the mattress while Benny had somehow managed to maneuver himself so that his head was where his feet should go, and his feet were where his head should go. Ben chuckled softly to himself. In some ways the boys were so different, but in others they were so alike.<\/p>\n

Ben walked over to Johnny. He laid a gentle hand on the boy\u2019s back, pausing to feel the soft vibration of his snoring.<\/p>\n

\u201cJohnny, time to get up\u2026\u201d Ben whispered, patting his back.<\/p>\n

\u201cHuh?\u201d Johnny rubbed his eyes with the back of his hands.<\/p>\n

\u201cCome on\u2026\u201d Ben stooped to pick up the pair of overalls that had fallen from the footboard to the floor during the night, then turn to gather Johnny in his arms.<\/p>\n

Ben stopped to see that Benny was still sleeping soundly before proceeding out of the room. Johnny rested his head on Ben\u2019s shoulder and immediately went back to snoring again. Ben smiled and patted the child\u2019s back to wake him again.<\/p>\n

\u201cCome on now Johnny\u2026 wake up\u2026 that\u2019s a boy\u2026\u201d He carried the boy into the bedroom that he and his older sons were now sharing (two of them shared the bed and two slept on the floor). He deposited Johnny on the bed and proceeded to take off his nightshirt and dress him in his overalls.<\/p>\n

\u201cAre we gonna go see Mama now?\u201d Johnny asked with a yawn.<\/p>\n

Ben nodded as he folded the nightshirt neatly and laid it on the end of the bed. \u201cYes, but first I thought you might like to help me with something.\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny was rubbing his eyes again but stopped suddenly, looking up at Ben curiously. \u201cMe?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded again.<\/p>\n

\u201cJust me?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben ruffled the boy\u2019s hair and led him from the room by the hand. \u201cThat\u2019s right \u2013 just you. We\u2019ll let Benny sleep a little while longer.\u201d<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

\u201cWould\u2019ja look at that!\u201d Johnny exclaimed when he saw the newborn piglets nestled up against their mother.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey were born just last night,\u201d Ben explained, \u201cthere\u2019s nine of them.\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny was already busy checking Ben\u2019s count. \u201cWow \u2013 that\u2019s a whole mess of little baby pigs!\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded with a laugh. \u201cYes, it is\u2026 but you see\u2026\u201d Ben pointed to the piglets, who were now beginning to wake with a powerful hunger in their bellies. \u201c\u2026there\u2019s one too many.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019cha mean?\u201d Johnny looked down to find eight of the piglets helping themselves to a hearty breakfast. \u201cOh\u2026 that little one\u2019s not gettin’ nuthin\u2019 to eat\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRight\u2026 sometimes that happens\u2026\u201d Ben commented matter-of-factly.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, cain\u2019t we do nuthin\u2019 \u2018bout it? I mean we could make\u2019em share or somethin\u2019\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben furrowed his brow curiously, \u201cHmm\u2026 maybe \u2013 how do you suppose we do that?\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny thought for a few moments. \u201cWell, maybe we could let half of\u2019em eat first and the other half eat second\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben raised his eyebrows with a smile. \u201cYou might be on to something there\u2026 Because you know, pigs are awfully expensive, and I\u2019d hate for you to lose one of them because they didn\u2019t want to share\u2026 don\u2019t you think?\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny nodded emphatically.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, let\u2019s get to it then.\u201d Ben motioned the boy to follow him into the pig pen.<\/p>\n

The two set about the task of separating the piglets into their two feeding groups. Ben took a deep breath and held one of the piglets up for Johnny to see.<\/p>\n

\u201cJohnny, come here for a minute\u2026\u201d Johnny placed the last of four piglets into a crate and moved to sit next to Ben.<\/p>\n

\u201cYessir?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou know\u2026 sometimes people \u2013 well, sometimes we can be like these little piglets\u2026 sometimes we can be selfish and push other people away\u2026 We don\u2019t usually mean to hurt other people, we\u2019re just so busy looking out for ourselves, that we sometimes forget about others\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny nodded solemnly and Ben continued. \u201cLast night I know you felt a little left out. Benny had no right to talk to you the way he did \u2013 and I\u2019ll speak to him about that later. Benny will have to learn how to share his brothers and myself with you from now on. It\u2019ll be hard, but he\u2019ll come around.\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny looked at the piglet in Ben\u2019s hand, avoiding eye contact with his father. Ben paused before proceeding. \u201c\u2026Just like you\u2019ll have to learn to share your Mama\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny\u2019s head snapped up. There it was. If Ben had ever doubted that Johnny was just as jealous as Benny, he was absolutely sure of it at this moment.<\/p>\n

\u201cI know\u2026\u201d Ben put the piglet down and pulled Johnny into his lap, \u201c\u2026you didn\u2019t ask for any of us to come in here and take away your Mama\u2019s attention \u2013 or your Aunt Jeanette\u2019s\u2026 But believe it or not, Benny didn\u2019t ask to come here either\u2026 Sometimes things happen and well\u2026 we really don\u2019t get a say in it. But I\u2019d be lying if I said I wasn\u2019t glad of one thing in all this\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny looked up at him, questioning. \u201cI\u2019m glad I found you.\u201d\u00a0 Johnny smiled shyly.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026And I know your Mama is glad that she got to find Benny too\u2026 So now, just like those little piglets, we all have to learn to share.\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny nodded and leaned against his father\u2019s chest. Ben wrapped his arms around the boy, pulling him close. That had gone better than he\u2019d hoped. Now, he just needed to get through to Benny\u2026<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Hoss breathed heavily, sweat beading on his brow. He dumped the stack of freshly chopped wood onto the wood stack. He pulled his handkerchief out of his back pocket and wiped his face. He hadn\u2019t been in Louisiana since he was a boy and he\u2019d forgotten about the dadblamed humidity. He looked up at the morning sun. It wasn\u2019t even eight o\u2019clock yet and already he was sweating like a horse. He shoved his handkerchief into his pocket again and bent over to straighten up the pile of wood.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019cha doin\u2019?\u201d<\/p>\n

The tiny voice came from behind him and gave him such a start, that Hoss dropped one of the larger blocks of wood on his toe.<\/p>\n

\u201cOw!!\u201d\u00a0 Hoss held his offended toe as he hopped up and down on his other foot.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh gee, I\u2019m sorry, um\u2026 uh\u2026 what\u2019s yer name again?\u201d Johnny asked, scratching his head.<\/p>\n

Hoss winced, putting his foot down and limping over to the chopping block to sit down. \u201cHoss,\u201d he grunted.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh yeah\u2026 Hoss\u2026 I\u2019m really sorry \u2013 I didn\u2019t mean ta\u2019 scare ya or nuthin\u2019\u2026\u201d Johnny walked over and inspected Hoss\u2019s toe, which was now being shed of its boot and sock. \u201cDoes it hurt bad?\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss\u2019s whole foot was throbbing, and his toe was already taking on a purplish color. When he looked into Johnny\u2019s concerned eyes, he forced a smile to his face. \u201cAh, it\u2019s nuthin\u2019 \u2013 don\u2019t\u2019cha worry none.\u201d Hoss replaced the sock and gingerly slipped his foot back into the boot that seemed to feel a bit small now.<\/p>\n

Johnny\u2019s face broke into a relieved smile. \u201cHey, how come yer name is Hoss?\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss gave him a wink, \u201cHow come yer name is Johnny?\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny cocked his head, seeming annoyed. \u201cWell, that\u2019s a silly question \u2013 cuz I\u2019as born with that name!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell\u2026\u201d Hoss cocked his head, mocking the boy\u2019s mannerisms good-naturedly, \u201c\u2026I\u2019as born with the name Hoss!\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny looked at him skeptically and Hoss began to laugh. \u201cI\u2019m just joshin\u2019 ya \u2013 my real name\u2019s Eric. Folks jist call me Hoss cause I\u2019m so big.\u201d Hoss ruffled the boy\u2019s hair then motioned to the pile of wood. \u201cCome on, let\u2019s get that wood stacked an\u2019 go in an\u2019 git us some breakfast.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh yeah!\u201d Johnny stopped suddenly. \u201cI was \u2018posed to tell you that Pa says fer you ta\u2019 take me up to see Mama and then we\u2019re \u2018posed to\u2026 um\u2026\u201d he closed his eyes trying to recall the instructions. \u201c\u2026oh yeah \u2013 you and me is \u2018posed to make sure them baby pigs all gets fed\u2026Anyway, Pa says he has to do somethin\u2019 with Benny an\u2019 it might take a while\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHmm\u2026\u201d Hoss mumbled curiously. \u201cWell, let\u2019s get to it then\u2026We\u2019ll send Adam and Joe out to finish with this here \u2013 Jist between the two of us, it\u2019s good fer them to stay busy with lots\u2019a work. It keeps\u2019em outta trouble\u2026\u201d Hoss laughed and put a hand on Johnny\u2019s shoulder and led him inside.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Ben sat on the edge of Benny\u2019s bed smiling at the rather backwards position the boy had worked himself into during his sleep. He shook his son gently and Benny\u2019s eyes fluttered open.<\/p>\n

\u201cTime to get up\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben waited a moment for his son to sit up, before turning to find the boy\u2019s overalls. He found them wadded up on the dresser. When he turned back, Benny was just falling back on the bed again, eyes already shut.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, no you don\u2019t\u2026\u201d Ben sat him back up and shook his head, grinning. For the boy to be so full of energy during the day, it could be next to impossible to wake him up in the morning. Ben had discovered a long time ago that, in order to get him up and dressed in a reasonable amount of time, Benny had to be out of bed and on his feet immediately upon waking up. Allowing him to gradually wake up on his own was, in Ben\u2019s experience, completely futile.<\/p>\n

\u201cAlright now, out of bed and take your nightshirt off\u2026\u201d Ben said as he helped him up.<\/p>\n

Benny mechanically did as he was told, rubbing his eyes and mumbling something incoherent. He held on to his father\u2019s arms to steady himself as he stepped into the overalls being held in front of him. He mumbled something again, though his eyes were completely shut, and Ben thought he caught a few recognizable words.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s that son?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026er\u2019s Lonny\u2026a\u2019mean\u2026Donnie\u2026a\u2019mean\u2026\u201d Benny shook his head groggily, his eyes opening slightly.<\/p>\n

Ben furrowed his brow, trying to make out what the boy was trying to say. \u201cOh \u2013 \u2018Where\u2019s Johnny\u2019?\u201d Benny nodded sleepily.<\/p>\n

Ben fastened Benny\u2019s suspenders as he explained, \u201cHe\u2019s with Hoss \u2013 he\u2019s been up for a while now\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny suddenly came fully awake, his eyes opening widely. \u201cWith Hoss?!\u201d<\/p>\n

Before the words were out of his mouth, Benny was heading for the door.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhoa\u2026\u201d Ben reached back and apprehended the boy by the back of his overalls. \u201c\u2026Now you just wait right there, young man.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny turned around slowly to face his father. \u201cYeah, Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cCome here and sit down \u2013 I\u2019d like to talk to you.\u201d Ben\u2019s voice was soft and pleasant, but also very commanding. Benny cast a disappointed glance toward the door then slowly walked over to sit next to his father on the bed.<\/p>\n

\u201cYessir\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben waited while Benny clambered onto the bed, grateful for the chance to re-collect his thoughts. He took a deep inhalation and began.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny, tell me something\u2026.\u201d He gestured to Genevieve\u2019s room next door, \u201cWho\u2019s room is that?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny shrugged. \u201cWell\u2026you know\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know, but I want you to tell anyway,\u201d Ben smiled and waited patiently for the boy to answer.<\/p>\n

Benny\u2019s head dropped, his face turning a bit pink. \u201cIt\u2019s\u2026 her<\/em> room\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben cocked his head. \u201cWho is \u2018her\u2019?\u201d he prodded gently.<\/p>\n

Benny turned his face full away from his father and started fidgeting uncomfortably. Ben noted the back of the boy\u2019s ears turning a deeper shade of red.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny\u2026 I asked you a question\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny\u2019s hand went up to his face and, though he was turned around, Ben knew he was starting to cry.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny\u2026\u201d Ben took hold of his son by both arms and turned him around to face him. Benny\u2019s eyes were red with unshed tears. \u201cJust answer me son.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny looked down sadly, causing a few tears to trickle down his cheeks.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s my\u2026\u201d Benny began softly, \u201cThat\u2019s\u2026\u201d he sniffed and wiped the tears away stubbornly, \u201cThat\u2019s Johnny\u2019s <\/em>Mama.\u201d<\/p>\n

It was all Ben could do to keep from reaching out and pulling the boy close to him. No<\/em>, he thought, he\u2019s not a baby any longer \u2013 He must learn how to deal with this.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, it\u2019s Johnny\u2019s mama \u2013 but she\u2019s also yours.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny frowned, large pools of tears collecting at each of his bright blue eyes.<\/p>\n

\u201cJust like I\u2019m your Pa \u2013 and I\u2019m also\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNO!\u201d Benny practically yelled, interrupting his father. He jumped from the bed, placing his hands on his hips. The tears were now flowing unchecked down his face.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNO!\u201d Benny turned away, covering his ears in protest.<\/p>\n

Ben pursed his lips and deepened his tone, \u201cBenjamin Joseph Cart\u2026!\u201d<\/p>\n

Before he could get the child\u2019s full name out, Benny had fallen into a heap on the floor. He covered his ears and rocked himself back and forth as he shook his head. He was whimpering, but his crying soon turned into uncontrolled sobbing.<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s own eyes burned with tears as he knelt next to the boy and pulled him close. His heart broke, though, when Benny wriggled free of his father\u2019s embrace and fell back to the floor in hysterics.<\/p>\n

Ben heard the loud clunking of familiar footsteps and was not surprised when, a moment later, he heard the bedroom door open.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa\u2026\u201d Hoss\u2019s soft voice reached Ben\u2019s ears.<\/p>\n

Ben stared helplessly at the six-year-old on the floor in front of him. Benny was still wailing uncontrollably, though he now seemed to be doing more choking than crying.<\/p>\n

Ben buried his head in his hands. \u201cHoss\u2026\u201d At the simple command Hoss nodded and moved quickly to retrieve the boy from the floor. Benny protested with kicks and screams, but Hoss only held on tighter, pinning the boy\u2019s arms and legs against his own body. The next thing Ben knew, his son\u2019s screams were drifting away down the stairs and out the front door.<\/p>\n

Ben felt a small hand touch his shoulder. He turned to see Johnny standing next to him, staring back at the door sadly. \u201cIs Benny all right?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, son\u2026\u201d Ben sighed and patted the boy\u2019s hand gently, \u201c\u2026but he will be\u2026 eventually\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Adam and Joe looked up from the woodpile they were stacking at the sound of Benny\u2019s screaming.<\/p>\n

\u201cUh-oh\u2026\u201d Joe said, swapping a dismal glance with his oldest brother.<\/p>\n

The next moment Hoss was coming out of the front door headed to the barn. On his heels was Jeanette, frantically asking what the matter was.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019ll be alright directly, Miss Jeanette\u2026\u201d Hoss didn\u2019t stop to explain. Rather, he continued his quick pace to the barn.<\/p>\n

Jeanette stopped in the middle of the yard, staring after them helplessly. Adam stepped forward, clearing his throat uncomfortably.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019ll be alright\u2026\u201d Adam said, trying to reassure her. \u201c\u2026Hoss always knows how to calm him down when he gets like that.\u201d<\/p>\n

If Jeanette heard him, she gave no indication. She sighed, still turned in the direction of the barn, where Benny\u2019s screams could be heard along with the low murmuring of Hoss\u2019s voice. Adam looked back at Joe, frowning and shaking his head. The two had a sort of silent conversation behind Jeanette\u2019s back, both realizing it was no use pretending that all was fine and dandy with their youngest brother. The events of the last few months had left the boy with open wounds on his heart. Only time would tell if his tender heart would be able to heal.<\/p>\n

Jeanette turned silently to go back into the house, shaking her head sadly as she went. Adam looked again to Joe and nodded toward the barn. The two men turned and went quickly to see what they could do to help Hoss.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Hoss turned, sensing the two familiar figures standing in the doorway of the barn. He nodded a somber greeting and turned back to his small charge. Benny was draped in one of his large arms and with his other hand, Hoss patted the boy\u2019s cheek several times.<\/p>\n

\u201cBenny, open yer eyes, boy.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny\u2019s eyes opened revealing bright blue eyes against a pale face. With a gasp, he sat up in Hoss\u2019s arms. He whimpered and another bout of crying and choking threatened to rear its ugly head. Hoss set him down and pushed his head down between his knees. After a few moments Benny dropped to the barn floor, pulling his knees close to his body. Hoss moved from where he sat on an old crate to sit next to Benny on the ground. He rubbed the boy\u2019s back, offering silent comfort while Benny tried to get hold of himself.<\/p>\n

Adam and Joe came in quietly and sat across from their other two brothers on the ground. They all waited, not speaking.<\/p>\n

Several minutes later Benny\u2019s crying gave way to the occasional hic-cup. Hoss pulled his brother into his lap, cradling him in a way he\u2019d not done since Benny was a baby. He looked down at the boy\u2019s face. His cheeks were glistening from his tears and his eyes were red and puffy. Benny stared to one side, not looking at any of his brothers or acknowledging their presence. Except for an occasional hic-cup, he was perfectly motionless.<\/p>\n

Hoss pulled a handkerchief from his back pocket and with it, wiped the tears and sweat from Benny\u2019s face. The child continued to lay motionless in his brother\u2019s arms and stare. Hoss looked up at Adam and Joe and shook his head despondently.<\/p>\n

Clucking his tongue softly, he brushed a few wayward curls from Benny\u2019s face. \u201cI know\u2026life just ain\u2019t fair\u2026 is it Little Man?\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss allowed Benny to lie there in his numb state for a good while as he rocked him gently. He knew he needed to speak with the boy and make him understand reason, but for now he just wanted Benny to know they were all there and weren\u2019t going to leave him. He reckoned that was really the issue that always prompted these fits; Benny didn\u2019t want to think that his father and brothers might leave him.<\/p>\n

Hoss looked at the men sitting across from him. Joe kept his gaze steadfast on his little brother as he absentmindedly twirled a bit of hay between his fingers. Adam had an elbow resting on one bent knee. With his eyes closed, he pinched the bridge of his nose. Hoss knew how frustrated they both were, but there was nothing any of them could do.<\/p>\n

Hoss looked up, unstartled, as the barn door opened again.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, Pa,\u201d he said gruffly.<\/p>\n

His father nodded gravely and came over to kneel next to Hoss. He laid a gentle hand on Benny\u2019s head and sighed.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s warm\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss nodded, \u201cHe done himself in this time\u2026 he\u2019ll be okay in a bit, I reckon.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben shook his head, his hand still resting on Benny\u2019s head. \u201cI didn\u2019t handle that correctly\u2026\u201d he murmured.<\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s hand fell from the bridge of his nose to his knee with a loud slap. \u201cOh, come on Pa\u2026 there is<\/em> no correct way to handle this\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cEven still\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben stood from his kneeling position to sit on the crate Hoss had previously been occupying. He looked around at his sons and thought of the last time they\u2019d sat like this in their own barn; Benny in Hoss\u2019s lap, Adam and Joe sitting next to one another. The only difference was that had been a happy moment \u2013 a moment he\u2019d remember for always. As he looked around, he knew he would remember this one as well, but it would not be something he looked back on with happiness. Somehow they would get through this; had<\/em> to get through this.<\/p>\n

Ben glanced down at his youngest and noted the boy was now looking straight at him.<\/p>\n

\u201cAre you ready to talk now?\u201d Ben asked softly.<\/p>\n

Benny nodded.<\/p>\n

Ben forced a faint smile to his lips and held out his arm to the boy. Benny squirmed his way to a sitting position in Hoss\u2019s lap and then stood and approached his father. Ben lifted him to sit on his knee and felt his son\u2019s sweat-soaked hair lean into his chest.\u00a0 He looked at his older sons and motioned toward the door with his head. The three men nodded and stood, dusting themselves off.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019ll, em\u2026 just go in and get some breakfast now\u2026\u201d Adam offered and the three excused themselves quietly, though a bit forlornly.<\/p>\n

Ben watched them leave and was startled when he heard Benny\u2019s voice announce: \u201cM\u2019sorry, Pa\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

He took a deep inhalation and turned to the boy. \u201cI know you are\u2026 and I understand \u2013 not that I think your behavior was tolerable, mind you \u2013 but I do understand\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny nodded slowly, his piercing blue eyes fixed seriously on his father\u2019s.<\/p>\n

Ben wrapped both arms around his son. \u201cWell\u2026 we\u2019ve got a bit of a problem on our hands, don\u2019t we?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny looked up at his father curiously. \u201cWhat\u2019cha mean?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben shrugged in mock-apathy. \u201cOh, well\u2026 you know\u2026 with Johnny and all\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s wrong with Johnny?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I certainly can\u2019t have him making you upset like that again\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, but he didn\u2019t make me upset,\u201d Benny blurted out, interrupting his father.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell\u2026I mean, it weren\u2019t really his fault\u2026\u201d Benny\u2019s face turned pink as he spoke, \u201c\u2026it\u2019s just that\u2026 well\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben shook his head, cutting the boy off. \u201cNo, I think having the two of you together is causing quite a problem \u2013 It\u2019s really best if we go on back to the Ponderosa and just leave him here and go about life the way we did before\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course, there is just one problem with that\u2026\u201d Ben scratched his head as though trying to find some impossible solution. \u201c\u2026You know, Johnny\u2019s mama is really sick and well\u2026 the doctor told her that she might not have much time left \u2013 if you know what I mean\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShe\u2019s\u2026\u201d the boy swallowed hard, \u201c\u2026dyin\u2019?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded and watched as the boy sadly dropped his gaze to the ground. \u201cI didn\u2019t know that, Pa\u2026 what\u2019ll happen to Johnny after\u2026 after\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, he was supposed to come live with us \u2013 at the Ponderosa\u2026 but now\u2026I\u2019m not sure that arrangement will work\u2026\u201d Ben explained, arms still encircling his son.<\/p>\n

Benny looked up with a sudden jerk, nearly falling off Ben\u2019s lap. \u201cBut where will he go?! You cain\u2019t just leave him here!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, he\u2019ll have your Aunt Jeanette.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPa! That ain\u2019t the same an\u2019 you know it!\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben shrugged, \u201cWell, what do you suggest we do then? It won\u2019t do to have you two arguing and being jealous of each other all the time.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny straightened up his shoulders and coolly explained, \u201cWell, I s\u2019pose we\u2019ll just have to learn how to live with it.\u201d Benny lifted his head in an attempt to appear more grown up.<\/p>\n

\u201cBesides\u2026\u201d Benny let his posture slouch back to what it normally was, \u201c\u2026Johnny\u2019s not all bad \u2013 we have lots\u2019a fun together.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben patted his son\u2019s back and gave a quick wink. \u201cYou know, that\u2019s a pretty manly way to look at it, son.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cReally?!\u201d Benny perked up at the thought.<\/p>\n

\u201cReally.\u201d<\/p>\n

Chapter 29 \u2013 From One Father To Another<\/strong><\/p>\n

Jeanette looked at the large portions of left over bacon, eggs and biscuits and sighed. Genevieve and Johnny were the only ones who had eaten any breakfast and what remained was now completely cold. She sighed again, wondering how Benny was doing. She\u2019d never seen him that upset. She wasn\u2019t sure what had provoked the fit of rage, but she was sure she could make a pretty good guess of it. The poor boy\u2026<\/p>\n

Jeanette dismissed the thought and turned her attention back to her work. She decided to wait a few more minutes before discarding breakfast altogether, just in case. Instead, she set herself to the task of peeling potatoes and carrots for the stew she planned on making for supper. She\u2019d hardly begun when she heard men\u2019s voices approaching the back kitchen door. A moment later the screen door creaked open, and three sets of boots could be heard on the wood floors.<\/p>\n

\u201cMiss Jeanette?\u201d Hoss took his hat off and hungrily eyed the food on the stove. \u201cIs it too late for breakfast, ma\u2019am?\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette smiled, \u201cOf course not. I\u2019ll get three plates.\u201d<\/p>\n

The three men nodded their weary thanks and took their seats at the table.<\/p>\n

Jeanette looked at the cold mess that had been breakfast and frowned. It wouldn\u2019t be very appetizing in this state. She filled three plates and placed them in the cast iron warmer, promising the men it would only take a few minutes.<\/p>\n

\u201cHow is Benny,\u201d she asked a little apprehensively.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe finally calmed down \u2013 Pa\u2019s talking with him,\u201d Joe explained.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s a good\u2026\u201d Jeanette was going to say that Ben was a good father, but she was interrupted by a knock on the screen door.<\/p>\n

\u201cBon Jour, Jeanette.\u201d The greeting came from a small man dressed in priestly clothing, peering in through the screen mesh.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh!\u201d Jeanette felt the color rise in her cheeks. \u201cI\u2019m so sorry Father Fontenot! Your wire said you were coming today, and I completely forgot! \u2013 Come in, come in!\u201d<\/p>\n

She hurried to welcome the frail, old gentleman into the kitchen. The man entered and kissed her on either cheek, mumbling a quiet blessing in French. Jeanette knew the words only because he\u2019d said them to her every time they\u2019d met since she was a child. Her own family had somehow neglected the teaching of their native French tongue to the newer generations. While she knew enough to understand a little, she only knew how to speak in very broken French.<\/p>\n

\u201cFather Fontenot, these are Ben Cartwright\u2019s oldest sons \u2013 you remember Monsieur Cartwright, don\u2019t you?\u201d The elderly man nodded with a large and partially toothless smile. \u201cThis is Adam, Hoss and Little Joe.\u201d The men clamored to their feet and nodded respectfully.<\/p>\n

Father Fontenot made his way slowly over to Joe, with a great deal of help from his cane. He placed a hand on Joe\u2019s head and repeated the blessing. When he finished, he smiled and said, \u201cYou are Marie\u2019s child, no doubt of that.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFather Fontenot, your wire said that you had come back on special business,\u201d Jeanette began as the five took their seats at the table.<\/p>\n

The man nodded, holding up a crooked finger, \u201cOui, but before I get into that I must inquire about Genevieve \u2013 is she well? She was beginning to feel ill again when she left for Nevada last spring\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette shook her head sadly and the old man\u2019s eyes darkened. \u201cI see\u2026\u201d he murmured. \u201cAnd the child?\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette smiled uncomfortably and motioned to the men sitting opposite her. \u201cHe is here, along with his father and older brothers.\u201d Jeanette noted the worry in the priest\u2019s eyes and hurried on. \u201cHe\u2019s fine, Father \u2013 we took him to see that doctor you sent to us and he said Benny is perfectly healthy!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cImpossible!\u201d An astonished smile spread across Father Fontenot\u2019s face. He raised his hands heavenward and offered a short but ecstatic prayer. Jeanette couldn\u2019t quite understand the words, but knew it was a prayer of thanksgiving.<\/p>\n

Adam cleared his throat and smiled politely. \u201cFather, I gather New Orleans is your parish?<\/p>\n

The priest nodded. \u201cOui, in part, but I have been needed elsewhere these last few months. This cursed war\u2026 Too many good men lay dying on muddy battlefields \u2013 and too few priests and clergy to tend to the spiritual needs of them all.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou knew my mother?\u201d Joe asked, a hint of eagerness lacing his voice.<\/p>\n

A nostalgic smile came to the old man\u2019s face. \u201cOui, oui\u2026 A truly amazing woman, for certain.\u201d Father Fontenot sighed, \u201cA priest never forgets the children he has baptized. They are as good as his own children\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFather, please,\u201d Jeanette pleaded with him, placing a hand on his arm, \u201cYou would not have come all the way back here at this time simply to make small talk. What is it you wanted to see me about?\u201d<\/p>\n

The smile on the priest\u2019s face was replaced by a hard and weary scowl. \u201cYou are right, my child. I have come because\u2026 he<\/em> is dead.\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette felt her heart stop at his words. She did not need to ask who \u201che\u201d was.<\/p>\n

\u201cGood,\u201d was all she said before hurrying out of the room, leaving the four men bewildered and alone.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Ben held the tiny hand in his larger one as Benny skipped alongside him. His heart felt a great relief, but his body was already exhausted and it was only a few hours into the day. He stopped a little ways from the kitchen door and knelt, pressing one knee into the dirt.<\/p>\n

\u201cOne more thing, son,\u201d he pulled Benny in front of him, resting his hands on the boy\u2019s waist. \u201cRemember, it\u2019s not good to be jealous \u2013 especially of your brother. That can lead to hate, and you don\u2019t want to hate anybody do you?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny shook his head, his face turning gravely serious.<\/p>\n

\u201cAlso\u2026 I think you hurt Johnny\u2019s feelings last night\u2026 I think it would be good if you apologized, don\u2019t you?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny nodded. \u201cIt\u2019s kinda like Joseph \u2013 his brothers were real jealous of him. That\u2019s why they sold\u2019im into slavery, right? \u2013 I don\u2019t wanna be like them.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s a good boy \u2013 now let\u2019s go in and see if your Aunt Jeanette has any breakfast left.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben smiled as the boy skipped ahead of him. He wasn\u2019t altogether sure they\u2019d resolved everything, but at least it was a step in the right direction.<\/p>\n

Ben sighed deeply as he reached the kitchen door. Entering, he caught a fleeting glimpse of Benny passing through the door at the opposite end of the kitchen to find his brother. He laughed, turning his attention to the four men sitting at the table.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa,\u201d Adam said, standing and gesturing to the visitor, \u201cThis is Father Fontenot.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben smiled and offered his hand to the man. \u201cOh, yes \u2013 we\u2019ve met before. Good to see you again Father \u2013 and that,\u201d Ben indicated the doorway his youngest had just disappeared through, \u201cwas Benny.\u201d<\/p>\n

The men laughed pleasantly as they took their seats.<\/p>\n

\u201cMonsieur Cartwright, I am glad to see you here \u2013 I thought you would probably come\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh?\u201d Ben asked, raising a skeptical eyebrow.<\/p>\n

Father Fontenot nodded, \u201cI must say, I did not think Genevieve would succeed when she left for Nevada\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben glanced up at his sons, all of them shifting uncomfortably as the man continued.<\/p>\n

\u201c\u2026 But, since she did, I see that it was a good thing now. You are all together as you should be, no?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben shook his head, trying his hardest to keep his words and tone as gracious as possible. \u201cNot exactly Father\u2026 we came to get Benny back. That was all we had planned to do \u2013 until\u2026 well, until we found out about Johnny\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAh, Johnny\u2026\u201d The priest smiled broadly, \u201c\u2026 a precious child, and the light of his mother\u2019s life. Those boys \u2013 I remember when I baptized them \u2013 I never forget the children I baptize,\u201d he reminded Joe with a wink before continuing, \u201cLittle Jean was small, but he was a strong one. But \u2013 how do you say the name? Ben-ny? \u2013 He was so tiny\u2026 I could hold him just like this,\u201d he held one hand out, his palm facing upward.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou baptized Benny, Father?\u201d Ben asked curiously.<\/p>\n

The old man\u2019s eyes shimmered as he nodded. \u201cOui\u2026 a sad day it was too\u2026\u201d He gave a slight shudder as his words trailed off. A moment later, though, he shrugged and brought a slight smile to his face. \u201cIt is no worry now, anyway. God has healed him \u2013 indeed he has\u2026 But I will never forget the pain and sadness of those first few weeks of his life\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

The rain fell in merciless sheets at his back as he approached the front steps of the house. Before he could reach a weathered, frail hand out to knock, the door opened.\u201cThank you for coming Father,\u201d Jeanette muttered through teary sobs.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cGenevieve \u2013 she is\u2026\u201dhe could hardly find the strength to put the horrid thought into words.<\/em><\/p>\n

Jeanette quickly shook her head, \u201cNo \u2013 not yet, but Dr. Ford thinks it might be soon.\u201dFather Fontenot nodded gravely and moved toward Genevieve\u2019s bedroom. He was halted by Jeanette\u2019s hand on his arm. \u201cThere\u2019s something else, Father\u2026\u201d Her words melted into another sob.<\/em><\/p>\n

The priest put a comforting arm around her. \u201cWhat is it?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cShe had twins. But, one of the babies\u2026\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Without waiting for an explanation, he turned quickly and proceeded to the bedroom, leaving Jeanette to her weeping. When he reached the room, Genevieve lay on the bed, her breathing quite labored. In the corner Dr. Ford leaned close to a lamp as he held an infant in the palm of one hand. Father Fontenot crossed himself as he took sight of the bluish color of the baby\u2019s skin.\u201cDoctor\u2026\u201d he managed through his constricted throat.<\/em><\/p>\n

Dr. Ford did not look up from the child in his arms but listened through his stethoscope to the tiny chest. He mumbled a quiet curse under his breath and turned the baby over, giving it a few quick blows to the back.Father Fontenot winced at the rough treatment with which the doctor was treating the child. Suddenly though, the baby began to cry and his bluish coloring gave way to a slightly pinker one. The priest let out a relieved sigh and turned to Genevieve. Her breathing was shallow and accompanied by a gurgling sound in her chest.\u201cGenevieve\u2026\u201d he took her hand gently. The lamplight flickered, making a few shadows dance across her face. In spite of the dim light, he could see her eyes open.\u201cFather, the doctor doesn\u2019t think the baby will live\u2026\u201d she broke into a coughing fit, ending her attempt at an explanation.<\/em><\/p>\n

The priest nodded his head and forced a faint smile to his face. \u201cDoctor, quickly, bring the child to me\u2026\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Father Fontenot paused, the words of the baptismal prayer still echoing in his mind. He blinked back his tears and continued, \u201cSomehow though\u2026. They both managed to hold on till morning. It\u2019s a funny thing about morning\u2026you see things a little clearer and your trials seem a little more bearable\u2026\u201d He pulled out a handkerchief and dabbed at his eyes and then his nose. \u201cThe next morning, Dr. Ford discovered that Genevieve was doing remarkably better, and he believed she had managed to buy herself a good deal more time. Benny, though\u2026 he had improved, but the doctor still believed he had a very minimal chance to survive more than a few years. And that is when Genevieve decided to send the boy to you.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben, who had been listening to the story with his chin cradled in his hand and his elbow resting on the table, now crossed his arms in front of him as he leaned toward the elderly man. Father Fontenot hurried on, sensing this was a part of the story Ben had never heard.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo, I agreed to bring the child to Virginia City, but on one condition \u2013 that we wait until he was strong enough to make the journey. So, we did.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo, she didn\u2019t mail him after all,\u201d Adam muttered, with a hint of disdain.<\/p>\n

Ben leaned nearer to the priest, his face turning red. \u201cWhy did you not bring him straight to me \u2013 and explain this whole mess, then?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cGenevieve told me about your friends \u2013 Tom and Annie,\u201d he closed his eyes trying to remember their names. \u201cShe said to give the boy to them and they would bring him to you. But we did include a letter \u2013 two letters in fact. One from Genevieve and the other from Dr. Ford. I never read them, but they were to have explained everything.\u201d<\/p>\n

The men around the table jumped at the sound of Hoss\u2019s fist hitting the table. \u201cThat letter didn\u2019t explain nuthin\u2019 \u2013 \u2018cept that she didn\u2019t want nuthin\u2019 ta do with him!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019ll be enough, Hoss,\u201d Ben said, his face in a scowl.<\/p>\n

\u201cAs I said, I did not read the letter, but I can assure you all \u2013 she did love him and felt that he had a much better chance of survival out there with you. You had the means to find him a doctor. But, in spite of her letter, you should have known about his illness from Dr. Ford\u2019s letter.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe never got a letter from Dr. Ford, Father,\u201d Joe said, voicing what the others were too frustrated to say.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo letter?\u201d The priest scratched his head curiously. \u201cThat is strange, indeed\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Five heads came up as the kitchen door opened. Jeanette entered, Benny and Johnny at her side. Her face showed that she had been crying. She forced a wobbly smile and apologized for her hasty and unexplained departure earlier.<\/p>\n

\u201cGenevieve is ready to see you, Father Fontenot.\u201d She nodded toward Ben. \u201cYou boys stay here with your father, please.\u201d<\/p>\n

Father Fontenot stood, leaning on his cane and walked to the door. He stopped momentarily to lay a hand on each of the boys and recite his blessing. Then he turned and followed Jeanette from the room.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Ben took a seat on a fallen log at the top of the hill. Slightly winded from his hike, he pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped his brow. Slowly, he took in the view before him. Below, the mighty Mississippi River meandered along as far as his eye could see to his right and left. Beyond it, the sun was setting in a brilliant display of pink and orange.<\/p>\n

Ben stretched his muscles, heaving a great sigh. It had been a long day. And with the little farmhouse becoming more and more crowded with people, he found himself perfectly content to spend this moment in solitude.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat is the matter, Monsieur Cartwright?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben jumped at the voice, his hand moving quickly to his right hip. He realized he wasn\u2019t wearing his gun, and he blushed at the instinctive reaction when he realized it was only Father Fontenot. Relaxing, he gave a faint smile to the man.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh \u2013 um \u2013 nothing, Father\u2026 Just watching the sunset.\u201d He motioned to the log. \u201cWon\u2019t you join me?\u201d<\/p>\n

The priest nodded and Ben helped him to the log. The old man was breathing hard and Ben wondered how in the world he\u2019d made it up the steep hill with nothing but the help of a rickety old cane.<\/p>\n

Father Fontenot panted as he took his seat on the log. \u201cIt is a beautiful sunset, is it not?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I don\u2019t mean to boast,\u201d Ben smiled, attempting to make small talk, \u201cbut we have the most spectacular sunsets out west.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben stole a glance at the old man sitting next to him. His eyes held a wisdom that was only achieved through longevity of life.<\/p>\n

\u201cPerhaps you\u2019re right\u2026 but the truth of the matter is\u2026\u201d the man turned with a smile. \u201c\u2026it is the same sun.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben answered with an agreeable nod.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou see\u2026\u201d The elderly man shrugged, \u201cJust because something appears to be different\u2026 does not mean it is.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben found himself wondering if the man even knew he wasn\u2019t making any sense. He found his smile deepening though, in spite of the thought. If there was one thing he\u2019d learned in his life, it was to appreciate age. So often, the elderly were treated as imbeciles \u2013 made to live out the remainder of their lives in a rocking chair, as though their time of usefulness had come to an end. Ben knew better though. He didn\u2019t believe a man could live seven or eight decades without having something pertinent to teach the younger generations.<\/p>\n

Father Fontenot turned back to Ben and gave him a soft, playful nudge.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow\u2026 you are wondering why I said that\u2026 no?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben gave a soft chuckle. Well, certainly no one could say the old man wasn\u2019t intuitive.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou think she\u2019s changed.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s smile faded and he shifted his position uncomfortably at the forthrightness of the old man\u2019s words. He was nothing, if not to the point.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, Father, she\u2019s certainly not the woman I married,\u201d he offered as graciously as he knew how.<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd how did you come to that decision?\u201d<\/p>\n

The man looked at Ben seriously, though his face still held the trace of a gentle smile.<\/p>\n

Ben shrugged. \u201cThe woman I married, never would have\u2026 done all those things\u2026 wouldn\u2019t have intentionally hurt anyone\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd what is it she has done?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben pursed his lips, frustration brewing inside of him.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou know the story, Father\u2026 her leaving\u2026 not telling me about Johnny\u2026 taking Benny away\u2026 this crazy story about Benny being sick and now suddenly he\u2019s not\u2026 the lost letter\u2026 arranging for that fraud of a judge\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNow I thought,\u201d Father Fontenot interrupted, raising a crooked finger in recollection, \u201cJeanette said they had nothing to do with that judge\u2026 That is what she told me when I spoke with her this afternoon.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben rolled his eyes and gave a soft snort. \u201cYes, yes \u2013 that\u2019s what she says<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, did it ever occur to you that she might be telling the truth?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben wondered at the man sitting next to him. Father Fontenot held no accusation in his tone. In fact, his manner was nothing more than casual; as though they were merely discussing the things of little consequence.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf she is telling the truth\u2026 then\u2026 where did this Judge Nelson come from? My son told me the only Judge Nelson on record died ten years ago.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, then there\u2019s your answer.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s my answer?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s dead.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDead?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAs a doornail, apparently,\u201d Father Fontenot laughed softly, impressed with his own joke.<\/p>\n

Ben laid his face in his hands, his elbows resting on his knees. The priest watched him, his smile fading.<\/p>\n

\u201cDid you ever consider,\u201d Father Fontenot said, placing a comforting hand on Ben\u2019s shoulder, \u201cthat God never intended for all of the mysteries of life to be explained? That perhaps he allowed all of those things to happen for a reason?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat reason?\u201d Ben mumbled, his head still cradled in his hands.<\/p>\n

\u201cFor healing.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben sat up straight and looked at the man incredulously.<\/p>\n

\u201cHealing? Ha! I wouldn\u2019t need healing if it weren\u2019t for all of this!\u201d Ben could feel the volume of his voice creeping up as he spoke.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou give them eyes, but they do not see\u2026\u201d Father Fontenot shook his head with a sigh. \u201cCan you not conceive, Monsieur Cartwright, that you<\/em> might not be the one in need of healing?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben stared at the man, allowing his words to sink in.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow I would be willing to bet\u2026\u201d Father Fontenot crossed himself at his use of the last word, \u201c\u2026that you\u2019ve spent the last several years \u2013 especially the last few months \u2013 asking God \u2018why?\u2019 \u2013 \u2018Why is this happening to me?\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded.<\/p>\n

\u201cPerhaps you should consider asking \u2018what?\u2019 \u2013 \u2018What is it you want me to do?\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben turned away from the man, slumping his shoulders.<\/p>\n

\u201cI already know what He wants me to do\u2026\u201d Ben admitted quietly. \u201cI just can\u2019t\u2026 I\u2019m \u2026 I\u2019m not ready to forgive her yet\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Father Fontenot gave Ben a soft clap on the back.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy friend, I\u2019m afraid that is not really up to you\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben felt his throat constrict. He nodded, not trusting his voice.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou see, the same God that loves you and freely offers you forgiveness\u2026 is the same that loves her and has already given His forgiveness to her \u2013 freely\u2026 If He can forgive her, should you not do the same?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben stared at the ground, feeling the priest\u2019s eyes upon him. He gave a long and weary sigh and finally nodded again.<\/p>\n

\u201cDesperate people make desperate decisions\u2026\u201d The old man paused when his voice quivered slightly. \u201cThere is more to her story, to be sure\u2026 the question is, are you willing to hear it?\u201d<\/p>\n

The priest turned back to the sunset before them and smiled. \u201cI remember your Western sunsets\u2026 and you are correct, they are beautiful\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben looked up at the glowing horizon, his elbows still resting on his knees.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt may look different\u2026. But it is the same sun, indeed\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Father Fontenot stood, leaning on his cane for good measure. He turned and placed a hand on Ben\u2019s shoulder.<\/p>\n

\u201cGod be with you \u2013 and give you peace.\u201d<\/p>\n

A moment later, Ben found himself alone once again.<\/p>\n

Chapter 30 \u2013 More To The Story, Indeed<\/strong>\u201cCrown me. Again.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe ignored the chuckles from his brothers and eyed Johnny suspiciously. Finally, his face fell into a somewhat pouting frown.<\/p>\n

\u201cI can\u2019t.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, that\u2019s right,\u201d Johnny said with a teasing grin, \u201cYou ain\u2019t got none of my pieces \u2013 I\u2019ll just use one\u2019a yer\u2019s, seein\u2019 as how I have most of\u2019em.\u201d<\/p>\n

The room erupted with laughter and Joe turned to his other three brothers with a scowl.<\/p>\n

\u201cLooks like you done met yer match, Little Brother!\u201d Hoss howled.<\/p>\n

Joe threw him a sarcastic smile, showing Hoss how unamused he was.\u00a0 \u201cJust so happens, that I\u2019m being nice and letting<\/em> him win.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam sauntered over to the checkerboard and picked up a handful of Joe\u2019s lost checker pieces and smiled. \u201cYeah, I see that\u2026 you\u2019re being really<\/em> nice, apparently.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t feel bad, Joe,\u201d Benny said pointing to the board, trying to control his giggling. \u201cYou still got two pieces left.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe glowered at the boy. \u201cYou\u2019re not helping.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLooks like yer gonna have to come up with a new strategy, Brother.\u201d Hoss smiled broadly, enjoying the look of frustration on Joe\u2019s face.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat you mean, Hoss,\u201d Adam raised a corrective finger, \u201cis that he\u2019ll have to come up with a new way to cheat.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe threw his hands up as the room filled with laughter again. \u201cAlright\u2026 fine \u2013 you try to beat him. But I\u2019m warning you, he may look all cute and adorable, but he\u2019s ruthless \u2013 ruthless I tell ya!\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe vacated his seat at the checkerboard and Adam took his place. Joe moved to sit next to Hoss on the sofa and pulled Benny into his lap. Before the boy had a chance to get comfortable, Joe began tickling him mercilessly.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere, that\u2019ll teach you to laugh at me!\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny squealed, trying to wriggle himself free from his brother\u2019s grasp, all the while crying for Hoss\u2019s help. Hoss shrugged in mock-apathy.<\/p>\n

\u201cI dunno, Benny \u2013 he\u2019s gotta a point\u2026 ya ought not laugh at someone who\u2019s bigger\u2019n you\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny broke into another bout of laughter as Joe turned him upside-down and continued with his tickling. Adam stood and approached the pair, squatting and turning his head to look his upside-down brother in the eye.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou know, it\u2019s really impossible to concentrate with you making all of that racket\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam! Somebody help me!\u201d Benny demanded, out of breath and still giggling.<\/p>\n

Johnny grinned broadly. \u201cI\u2019ll help!\u201d\u00a0 He ran over to his brothers, the checker game now completely forgotten. He\u2019d almost made it to Benny when a large hand fastened itself around the suspenders of his overalls. He felt himself being lifted from the ground and was soon eye to eye with Hoss.<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd just where do you think yer goin\u2019? \u2013 Hey Adam, I think this house has critter problem. Think we should get rid of\u2019em?\u201d<\/p>\n

The boys immediately began pleading through teary laughter with their brothers.<\/p>\n

\u201cI dunno Hoss\u2026 they look sturdy enough. Maybe we could put a saddle on\u2019em and get some work out of\u2019em.\u201d Adam picked up one of Johnny\u2019s feet that were dangling in the air and pretended to inspect it as he would a horse\u2019s hoof. Johnny squirmed, now being held at both ends.<\/p>\n

At the sudden sound of the front door slamming shut, the five looked up frozen \u2013 Joe still clutching tightly to an upside-down Benny and Hoss and Adam holding Johnny between them like a hammock.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell\u2026\u201d Ben said, scowling at the ridiculous sight before him. \u201cI, for one\u2026 agree with Adam \u2013 At the very least they should be good for hooking a plough to…\u201d<\/p>\n

The brothers remained frozen for another moment before breaking out into laughter again.<\/p>\n

A wide grin spread across Ben\u2019s face. \u201cAlright, you two\u2026time for bed.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh! I gotta go say \u2018night to Mama.\u201d Johnny squirmed his legs free from Adam\u2019s grasp as Hoss lowered him to the floor.<\/p>\n

Ben sent the boys upstairs, promising to be up soon to tuck them in. Benny and Johnny\u2019s voices quickly drifted away as they ascended the staircase and Ben turned back to his older sons.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell\u2026 everyone seems to be getting along just fine.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss chuckled softly, shaking his head in disbelief. \u201cI still cain\u2019t get over it. Them two look just alike, don\u2019t they?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt took me a while to get used to as well,\u201d Ben gave Hoss an understanding clap on the back. \u201cOh, hey \u2013 It looks as though Father Fontenot will be staying here for a day or so\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThis house is getting smaller everyday,\u201d Joe said, scratching his head.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, so I thought we could all stay in Benny and Johnny\u2019s room and let Father Fontenot have the other bedroom.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam and Hoss exchange agreeable shrugs. As the late comers, they were the ones assigned to sleeping on the floor. The hard wood floors would be just as uncomfortable in one room as the next.<\/p>\n

Ben nodded and turned to follow the boys upstairs.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, Adam?\u201d Ben turned as he reached the foot of the stairs.<\/p>\n

Adam exchanged an uncomfortable look with each of his brothers and then cleared his throat. \u201cWell\u2026 we thought we might take the boys on a little camp out tomorrow. In case you wanted to \u2026 well, to give you time to do whatever it is you might need to do\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben frowned, looking up toward Genevieve\u2019s bedroom. He nodded, mumbling his thanks before slowly climbing the stairs.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Benny didn\u2019t turn when the bedroom door creaked open behind him. Instead, he kept his attention on unbuttoning his overalls. His fingers fumbled with the button, and he harrumphed in frustration. He really preferred his old clothes \u2013 his boots and pants and belt and button-up shirt. He liked rolling his sleeves up like his Pa and older brothers did when they worked. It made him feel like he was older and big enough to do man\u2019s work. He had to admit though, the overalls were a lot cooler and were a lot easier to do fun stuff in \u2013 like climbing trees and hunting for crawdads. They\u2019d be perfect if it weren\u2019t for these dadblamed buttons<\/em>.<\/p>\n

\u201cWant some help, son?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny shook his head. He almost had it\u2026 There. The stubborn button finally found its way through the buttonhole. He slipped his shoulder out from under the other suspender, not bothering with the other button. He looked down at the overall-shaped tan lines on his chest and giggled.<\/p>\n

\u201cLook Pa \u2013 it looks like I still got\u2019em on\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

When he looked up, his Pa was smiling at him and holding out his nightshirt. He raised his hands up and allowed his father to slip the garment over his head.<\/p>\n

\u201cHere,\u201d Ben patted the mattress of Johnny\u2019s bed. \u201cYou sleep here tonight.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny frowned. \u201cBut that\u2019s Johnny\u2019s bed.\u201d<\/p>\n

His father nodded. \u201cI know\u2026 I\u2019m claiming parental privileges tonight \u2013 You two are small enough to share the one bed, anyway.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny started to ask what \u201cparental privileges\u201d meant but decided not to.\u00a0 When he saw the look on his father\u2019s face, he decided it must mean that Pa was Pa, and he could do whatever he wanted. Benny shrugged, unbothered by the change in sleeping arrangements. When I grow up I\u2019ll claim me some parental what\u2019cha call-its, too<\/em>, he thought.<\/p>\n

Benny crawled onto the bed and planted a kiss on his father\u2019s cheek before lying down. He could hear the muffled voices of Johnny saying his goodnight to Genevieve. Part of him wished he\u2019d gone in there too. She sure was nice. His mind took him briefly back to the day they\u2019d arrived in New Orleans. He\u2019d been so scared and desperately wanted to go home. But she\u2019d held him and told him there wasn\u2019t anything to be afraid of. He\u2019d had no reason to trust her, but something in her voice told him he could. As their carriage traveled through the streets of New Orleans, making its way to the Marceau estate, she started singing to him. He didn\u2019t recognize the tune or its words, but there was a sweetness in her voice that was calming.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa? Can I ask you somethin\u2019?\u201d He asked, pulling the covers over him.<\/p>\n

\u201cSure.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny watched his father for a moment as he sat beside him on the bed, trying to figure out how to ask his question.<\/p>\n

\u201cIs it\u2026 Is it okay if I like her?\u201d He motioned to the bedroom next door.<\/p>\n

His father gave him a strange look and Benny wondered if maybe he shouldn\u2019t have asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell\u2026 I know you hate\u2019er, but\u2026 well, she\u2019s awful nice, Pa\u2026.\u201d Benny fumbled with his words and began to wish he hadn\u2019t brought it up. \u201c\u2026 I\u2019as just wonderin\u2019\u2026 if it was alright with you if I like\u2019er\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

His father\u2019s seemed troubled by his request, so he quickly followed it up with, \u201cBut if you tell me \u2018no,\u2019 I won\u2019t \u2013 I promise\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny watched closely as his father\u2019s eyes became red. He wasn\u2019t sure why, but he found his own eyes stinging as if he wanted to cry.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry Pa \u2013 I didn\u2019t mean to make ya\u2019 sad\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

His father offered him a weak smile and placed a hand on his head. Benny could feel the calluses of his palm as it brushed against his forehead. His hands were enormous, and Benny wondered if he would ever be big enough to have hands like that.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t hate her, Benny.\u201d His father\u2019s voice was soft and raspy.<\/p>\n

Benny thought it looked like his father was going to say something else, but in the end, he simply closed his mouth and sighed with a frown. Silence hung in the air for several moments before Benny ventured to speak again.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe said I could call\u2019er \u2018Mama\u2019 like Johnny does\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI think it would be nice if you did that\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny raised his eyebrows, surprised at his father\u2019s words. \u201cYou do?\u201d<\/p>\n

When his Pa nodded, there was something in his expression that made Benny wonder if he really meant it.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, how come ya\u2019ll ain\u2019t married no more? I never heard of no one gettin’ married and then gettin’\u2026 well\u2026 not married\u2026\u201d He fidgeted absentmindedly with the seam on the blanket that covered him as he spoke.<\/p>\n

After a long moment of silence, Benny looked up. Pa seemed lost in thought. \u201cWell\u2026?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSometimes people change\u2026 but then\u2026\u201d Benny\u2019s head tilted to one side, confused as his Pa spoke. It was like he was talking to himself instead of to Benny. \u201c\u2026sometimes it\u2019s\u2026 still the \u2018same sun\u2019\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHuh?\u201d Benny wrinkled his nose, not understanding. Pa wasn\u2019t making any sense. Maybe he was asleep \u2013 sometimes Hoss would talk in his sleep, and he\u2019d have that same far-off look on his face. Hoss always did that, though. Once he even ate a whole meal in his sleep. Well<\/em>, he thought, only one way to find out.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cOw!\u201d Ben jumped, rubbing his arm where Benny had just pinched him.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, sorry Pa \u2013 I thought you\u2019d fell asleep\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

They both froze for a moment, each regarding the other with an element curiosity. At length, Benny spoke again.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo\u2026 is it okay?\u201d<\/p>\n

A faint smile came to his father\u2019s face, and he nodded. \u201cShe\u2019s your mother\u2026 of course it\u2019s okay for you to like her \u2013 even love her.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny let his body sink into the comfy mattress as he smiled. Good<\/em>, he thought, cause I already do<\/em>.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Ben carried a large armful of blankets into Benny and Johnny\u2019s room. The room was dark except for a dimly lit lamp in the corner. Johnny had returned from his mother\u2019s room and was now sleepily pulling his nightshirt over his head. On the bed, Benny was already fast asleep, one hand balled into a fist and resting on his pillow next to his face.<\/p>\n

If Johnny thought it was strange for Benny to be in his bed, he didn\u2019t show it. When he finished dressing, he groggily nudged his brother. Benny rolled over, not waking. Johnny climbed in beside him and in no time, both were sleeping soundly. Ben let out a soft chuckle as he watched them. Asleep, they were nearly impossible to tell apart.<\/p>\n

The door opened and Ben turned to see the rest of his brood entering, looking just as sleepy. It had been a long and tiring day for everyone.<\/p>\n

\u201cI brought your blankets in\u2026\u201d he whispered, and three heads nodded as they each accepted their bedding. \u201c\u2026I\u2019ll go tell Father Fntenot he can have the other room.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben made his way down the hallway toward Genevieve\u2019s room. He practically ran into the priest at her doorway. \u201cOh, excuse me Father\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIs my fault \u2013 I do not see well in the dark anymore\u2026\u201d The old man smiled, patting Ben\u2019s arm.<\/p>\n

\u201cI just wanted to let you know that my sons and I will be sharing the one room, so you can have the one at the end of the hall \u2013 your things are already in there.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, that is not necessary\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben raised his hand with a smile, \u201cNow it\u2019s already done \u2013 you just go on to bed, Father.\u201d<\/p>\n

The older man gave no further protest. \u201cMerci, Monsieur Cartwright. Goodnight.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded politely. He had just turned to go back to his bedroom when he heard a noise coming from Genevieve\u2019s room. The door stood slightly ajar and he took a few steps closer, listening to make sure nothing was wrong. Someone was crying. He took another step toward the door. It was Genevieve.<\/p>\n

Jeanette\u2019s voice was quiet and Ben could only distinguish a few words through Genevieve\u2019s muffled sobs. \u201cHe\u2019s dead, Genevieve\u2026 he can\u2019t hurt you anymore\u2026no reason to cry\u2026he\u2019s gone\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben turned and walked quietly back to the bedroom. His stomach churned. He can\u2019t hurt you anymore\u2026<\/em> The words echoed in his mind as a powerful feeling of anger and jealously flooded over him. Who had hurt her? He took a deep inhalation to calm himself and resisted the urge to barge into the room demanding an explanation. At length, he turned to go to bed.<\/p>\n

Entering the bedroom, Ben noted the three bodies already asleep on the floor. He stepped over and around them and blew out the lamp in the corner then maneuvered his way back to the empty bed in the dark. Hoss\u2019s voice mumbled something incoherent, and Ben realized he\u2019d just stepped on him.<\/p>\n

\u201cSorry son\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss mumbled something again before resuming his snoring.<\/p>\n

Ben laid down, not bothering to change his clothes. Though he was exhausted, sleep did not come easily for him. He laid there for a long while, staring in to the darkness. When sleep did come, it brought nightmares of faceless people trying to hurt those he loved.<\/p>\n

Chapter 31 \u2013 What Really Happened<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ben stood on the front porch waving one last goodbye to his sons as they headed off down the road, bedrolls tucked under their arms and a few canteens slung over their shoulders. Ben had been relieved when Adam informed him that they were only going to be camping about a half mile away. Though things had been relatively peaceful since they\u2019d arrived, there was still a war on, and Ben didn\u2019t relish the thought of his sons being off in the wilderness in unfamiliar country. In addition, there weren\u2019t enough horses for everyone and not even a buckboard to ride in. So, they\u2019d decided to make their short trek on foot.<\/p>\n

Ben squinted to make out the five that were now a good ways down the road. Even from this distance he could see Benny \u2013 or was it Johnny? \u2013 hitching a ride atop Hoss\u2019s shoulders, and Johnny \u2013 or was it Benny? \u2013 walking between Adam and Joe, holding fast to each of their hands. Every now and again the boy would pick his feet up and allow them to swing him back and forth. Soon, they reached a curve in the road and they disappeared from Ben\u2019s sight.<\/p>\n

Ben shook his head, smiling. His stomach growled, insisting it was high time he ate breakfast. He turned and followed the smell of bacon and eggs and biscuits to the kitchen.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, there you are Ben \u2013 I wondered when you\u2019d be in to eat.\u201d Jeanette smiled and set a plate at the table for him. Though no longer hot, it smelled delicious, and his stomach growled again in anticipation.<\/p>\n

Ben let out a soft laugh, \u201cIt took me this long to get Benny and Johnny ready \u2013 they were so excited about the trip, they would hardly hold still to get dressed!\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette smiled and joined him at the table, sipping on her coffee.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhere is Father Fontenot?\u201d Ben asked before taking a bite of a slice of bacon.<\/p>\n

\u201cWent out to say his prayers.\u201d She nodded toward the back door. \u201cI imagine he\u2019ll be a while.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded and took another bite. A comfortable silence fell for a few moments before Jeanette spoke again.<\/p>\n

\u201cI think it was nice of Adam and Hoss and Little Joe to take the boys on that camping trip\u2026 I don\u2019t think Johnny has ever been camping before.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe try to go a few times a year \u2013 usually do some hunting while we\u2019re out. Benny loves it. I think he would just as soon live<\/em> outside like that if I\u2019d let him.\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette gave a soft laugh. \u201cWell, I think it was really nice of them to do that \u2013 and give you a little break from them.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben shrugged. He had never been one to admit that he needed a \u201cbreak\u201d from any of his children. Perhaps it was just the stubborn pride of a man who\u2019d raised so many boys alone. But still, it was nice to have some time to himself every now and again.<\/p>\n

\u201cBen\u2026\u201d Jeanette\u2019s voice wavered a bit and Ben looked up at her, sensing her serious demeanor, \u201cdo you think you might\u2026talk to Genevieve today\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben pushed his plate back and rested his elbows on the table. He dropped his head and nodded. Another moment of silence fell between them before he spoke.<\/p>\n

\u201cI talked with Father Fontenot last night\u2026\u201d Ben cleared his throat, unsure of how to proceed. \u201cI think\u2026 well, I think I\u2019m ready to talk to her \u2013 listen<\/em> to her\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette nodded, a look of relief washing over her features. Ben shifted uncomfortably, wanting to ask a question of his own.<\/p>\n

\u201cJeanette\u2026I hadn\u2019t intended to, but I overheard her crying last night and I\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben paused when he noted her expression turning to one of shock. Clearly no one had been meant to hear the conversation.<\/p>\n

\u201cJeanette\u2026\u201d Ben reached across the table and covered her hand with his. \u201c\u2026Who hurt her?\u201d<\/p>\n

Her head dropped as she pulled her hand back to cover her face. A few quiet sobs shook her frame before she could compose herself. Ben frowned but waited patiently for her to respond.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe was horrible \u2013 absolutely horrible\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWho?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAllen Richardson\u2026 her husband.\u201d<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Adam took a deep breath as he took in his surroundings. This part of the country was beautiful, but it was no Nevada \u2013 and certainly no Ponderosa. He removed his hat and wiped the perspiration from face and neck. He leaned back against a large rock and took a bite of his biscuit. Jeanette had sent a large helping of biscuits with them that morning and his stomach was now informing him of its gratitude to her.<\/p>\n

A small, dark-haired form sat down quietly beside him. Adam noted the serious expression on the child\u2019s face \u2013 a stark contrast from the exuberance he\u2019d shown earlier. Before speaking, Adam snuck a subtle glance at the other child sitting a little ways off with his other brothers. From where he sat, he could discern the other boy\u2019s smaller, thinner frame and decided it was Johnny who sat next to him.<\/p>\n

\u201cSomething wrong?\u201d he probed, casually.<\/p>\n

Johnny shrugged, not responding.<\/p>\n

Adam smiled, somehow understanding. \u201cEver been away from home before, Johnny?\u201d<\/p>\n

The boy shrugged again, then shook his head.<\/p>\n

\u201cEver been away from your mother before?\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny nodded, \u201cOnce\u2026she went on a trip a little while back\u2026 that\u2019s the only time\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam nodded, knowing it had probably been the time she\u2019d spent in Carson City awaiting the custody hearing. That would have been nearly two months all together that she\u2019d been gone. Adam remembered back to when he was a boy, and their father would go away on business. He\u2019d be gone for weeks at a time. He knew how it felt. He put an understanding arm around the boy\u2019s shoulders.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019ll only be for one night. You\u2019ll see her again tomorrow.\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny nodded solemnly.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m just afraid that\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam caught a quick look at the boy and saw a few tears trickling their way down his cheeks. Johnny turned away, embarrassed.<\/p>\n

Adam took him gently by the shoulders and turned him back around to face him.<\/p>\n

\u201cListen here\u2026\u201d he took a handkerchief out of his pocket and wiped the boy\u2019s face. \u201c\u2026We\u2019re not that far away. If anything happened \u2013 anything \u2013 Pa would be here as fast as he could to tell you. I promise.\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny looked at him, his brown eyes glistening in the early morning sunlight. Adam hadn\u2019t realized just how much Benny and Johnny looked like their father. But now, as he looked into those dark brown eyes, he felt as though he were talking to a six-year-old version of his Pa.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhere\u2019s yer Mama?\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam frowned curiously at the question.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe\u2019s \u2013 em \u2013 well, she\u2019s in heaven.\u201d Adam recalled a time when he was that age and had asked the same question. His father\u2019s answer had been the same as his now.<\/p>\n

Johnny nodded, lowering his eyebrows thoughtfully. \u201cThat\u2019s where my Mama\u2019s goin\u2019 soon\u2026 Maybe they\u2019ll be friends together there\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam smiled. \u201cMaybe so.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam settled himself against the rock again and took another bite of his biscuit. He felt Johnny\u2019s head nestle against his side and he put his arm around him, giving him a little squeeze.<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Genevieve\u2019s room was dark and much cooler than the rest of the house. Ben stood for a moment in the doorway, allowing his eyes to adjust. Before he could completely make out her frail form on the bed, he could hear her raspy breathing. He stepped in, closing the door behind him and she stirred slightly.<\/p>\n

\u201cBen?\u201d Her voice was weak.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, it\u2019s me.\u201d Though he had spoken quietly, Ben thought his voice sounded too loud for such a quiet room.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhere are the boys?\u201d She tried to sit up with great difficulty and Ben moved to assist her.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey\u2019re camping with their brothers \u2013 remember? They came in and said goodbye before they left\u2026\u201d Ben propped a few pillows behind her back and sat on the edge of her bed.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh yes\u2026 I remember\u2026 It\u2019s hard to remember sometimes\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded, understanding. The few times he\u2019d been sick or hurt and had been bed-ridden, he remembered getting that same disoriented feeling as well. When one spends that much time in bed, dreams and real life seem to melt into one another until one isn\u2019t entirely sure which is which.<\/p>\n

Ben looked at her and a strange, but powerful feeling washed over him. Love? After all that had happened? He wondered for a moment if he might be losing his mind. How could he go back and forth between such undying anger and unfailing love? He was sure he didn\u2019t know. He looked at her hand and wanted to reach for it but decided against it.<\/p>\n

\u201cDid you want to speak to me about something, Ben?\u201d she asked with some trepidation. Ben knew she was afraid he might have come to rekindle their argument from weeks earlier.<\/p>\n

\u201cGenevieve \u2013 Gen\u2026\u201d His heart beating faster, he finally reached out and touched her hand, \u201cYou tried to tell me something a few weeks ago and\u2026and I wouldn\u2019t let you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBen, please\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

He cut her off with a gentle raise of his hand.<\/p>\n

\u201cGen, don\u2019t you think it\u2019s time we started being honest with one another \u2013 completely honest?\u201d<\/p>\n

Her eyes fell, and she began toying nervously with his fingers. Ben almost smiled as he recalled her nervous habit.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat did he do to you?\u201d The words sounded more blunt than he\u2019d intended and her head came up quickly, her eyes wide. \u201cJeanette told me a little, but said I should ask you\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Genevieve lowered her eyes again. \u201cThey say everybody has a demon of some sort in their life\u2026 Alan Richardson is mine.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben could feel her hands tremble as she continued to absentmindedly fiddle with his fingers.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe grew up together\u2026 from the time we were young he\u2019d made it perfectly clear his intentions toward me. When I was old enough to marry, I considered his proposal, but Jeanette warned me. She said she didn\u2019t trust him \u2013 that she\u2019d heard certain things about him. Before long, I realized her suspicions were correct. He was not only a drunkard, but he was violent. When I told him I didn\u2019t wish to see him again, he left \u2013 left New Orleans, left Louisiana \u2013 I didn\u2019t hear from him again.\u201d<\/p>\n

She took a deep breath before continuing.<\/p>\n

\u201cYears later, I met you,\u201d She smiled, though her eyes were still sad looking, \u201cAnd when we married, I thought I never could deserve such happiness. By that time in my life, I\u2019d given up on the prospect of true love\u2026 I never dreamed there would be you.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben gave her hand a squeeze and she breathed deeply to steady her voice.<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd then I went to see that doctor \u2013 you remember that part\u2026\u201d Ben nodded and she continued. \u201cWell, on the stage back I ran into him again\u2026 Out of the blue\u2026 I tried to pretend that I didn\u2019t recognize him, but it\u2019s a little difficult when you\u2019re the only two people sharing a coach\u2026 He had apparently returned to New Orleans just after we married and had come looking for me. Somehow, he learned of Mother\u2019s death and of our marriage. He had followed us out west\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

She shuddered but Ben held fast to her hand.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf I had thought the doctor\u2019s news was life-shattering, that stagecoach ride was worse\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know you recognize me Genevieve\u2026\u201d The man sneered and she felt her palms go sweaty.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cWe have nothing to say to each other,\u201d she said curtly, trying to sound unafraid.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re not fooling me \u2013 I\u2019ve seen that look before\u2026\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Genevieve frowned, not sure what he was talking about.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cThe sunken eyes\u2026 the pale complexion\u2026 Your mother had it too\u2026\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

She raised her chin stubbornly to him. \u201cYou know nothing about\u2026.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cHow much time do you have?\u201d The open candidness in his voice about such matters made her skin crawl. \u201cI hear doctors know those kinds of things\u2026 I saw you coming out of the doc\u2019s office earlier\u2026Knew you right away.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Her stomach churned at the thought of unknowingly being watched \u2013 especially by him.\u201cYou\u2019re going back to him then?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Her head snapped up. \u201cWhat business is that of yours?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

He laughed a loud and obnoxious laugh that made Genevieve feel ill. \u201cJust seems to me you might want to think pretty hard on that\u2026 what with how it happened with your mother and father and all\u2026\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Genevieve blinked back the tears that suddenly filled her eyes. She would not give him the satisfaction of seeing her cry. What right had he to bring up her parents? She hadn\u2019t thought it possible after all the time that had passed, but she felt her heart breaking all over again at the memory of what her father had done.Mother had been sick off and on for as long as she could remember. She remembered her mother telling her father what a terrible disease it was and how it had consumed others in their family. Father had told her it didn\u2019t matter \u2013 that he would stand with her to the end, as any good husband would. As Mother\u2019s health deteriorated, Father became heart-broken and unwilling to watch his wife suffer any further. Genevieve had been the one to find him that horrible morning\u2026 blood everywhere, his hand still clutching the pistol.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cSeems to me\u2026\u201d Richardson\u2019s voice penetrated her thoughts, but she was more than happy to pull her mind from that awful memory. \u201c\u2026you\u2019d want to save your beloved husband from that kind of an end\u2026\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Her face became hot with anger, and she began to feel dizzy. Her heart beat wildly in her chest and she doubled over in pain, willing her body to return to normal. The last thing she heard before she lost consciousness was Richardson\u2019s voice saying, \u201cCould be a way we might all benefit from this\u2026\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Genevieve buried her face in her hands and wept. Ben handed her his handkerchief and waited for her to continue.<\/p>\n

\u201cBen\u2026I\u2019ve spent the last seven years wishing beyond hope that I could go back and do things differently\u2026 but when I thought about my father lying there in his own blood\u2026 I just couldn\u2019t do that to you\u2026I know you say<\/em> you\u2019d have stayed by me to the end, but my father said that too\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben wanted to protest, but decided it was not the time. He was here to listen.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe went with me back to New Orleans. When he found out I was going to have a baby he blackmailed me into filing for divorce and into marrying him. He said he would tell you everything \u2013 about my being sick, about the baby and\u2026 I don\u2019t know, he just had this way of saying it so that it sounded like I had no other choice\u2026 He had hoped to get money out of the divorce. When he found out I hadn\u2019t asked you for any money, he\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Genevieve pulled down the collar of her nightgown, revealing a large scar spanning the width of her neck. Ben\u2019s nostrils flared and he felt his face becoming hot.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe did that to you?\u201d It came out more like a statement than a question.<\/p>\n

Genevieve nodded and added quietly, \u201cWith a rope\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBen, you have no idea how many times over the last seven years I\u2019ve wanted to tell you \u2013 hoping you\u2019d come and\u2026\u201d She shook the thought from her head as though, even now, she didn\u2019t believe he could possibly have loved her enough to come to her aid.<\/p>\n

Ben lowered his head, unsure of what to say. He knew the power a man like this Richardson could have over people \u2013 especially someone in a vulnerable position like Genevieve. He\u2019d seen it before. Sensible women doing and believing all sorts of things out of shear terror.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy\u2026why did Jeanette not tell me?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t think even she knew the whole story until recently. I told her the same things\u2026\u201d she stopped, correcting herself, \u201c\u2026the same lies<\/em> I told you. When I returned home, I stayed with her until after the babies were born \u2013 and the divorce. The whole time she pleaded with me to go back to you, but all I could think about was my father and how he\u2026\u201d she trailed off, but immediately blinked back her tears and continued. \u201cAnd of course, there was Alan \u2013 always somewhere nearby\u2026 After the divorce, he insisted that we get married immediately. When I protested, he threatened to go to you and tell you awful lies about me and tell you about Johnny. He said you\u2019d take him away and I\u2019d never see him again\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWait\u2026\u201d Ben rubbed his temples, trying to piece the story together. \u201cI already had Benny by the time we got our divorce\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Genevieve nodded. \u201cYes\u2026 as I said, I stayed with Jeanette until after the boys were born. Father Fontenot was already on his way to Virginia City with Benny before Alan even knew I\u2019d given birth. He never knew there were twins.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo, Johnny has grown up with this\u2026 this Richardson?\u201d Ben\u2019s stomach knotted itself at the thought. \u201cIf he laid a finger on that boy\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Genevieve raised her hand shaking her head. \u201cHe didn\u2019t. Thankfully, he paid little attention to him as long as Johnny stayed out of his way. I suppose he didn\u2019t see anything to be gained from him\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhere is he now?\u201d Ben asked, his eyebrows lowering evenly over his dark brown eyes.<\/p>\n

\u201cDead.\u201d There was no emotion in her voice, neither sadness nor joy. \u201cJeanette managed to find a group of confederate officers to\u2026forcefully persuade<\/em> him to join the Confederate cause. He left late last winter and I haven\u2019t seen him since\u2026 Father Fontenot had come to tell me that he died somewhere near Charleston.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben took a deep breath, feeling relieved and ashamed and many other things besides. Why hadn\u2019t he trusted her? Why hadn\u2019t he believed that she couldn\u2019t possibly be the horrible person she was trying to make herself out to be? Why hadn\u2019t he gone after her to bring her back? He laid his head in his hands and was surprised when he felt her hand on his shoulder.<\/p>\n

\u201cBen\u2026 I don\u2019t know why you should believe me after everything I\u2019ve done\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

He looked up, leaning toward her. He brushed the hair away from her face and allowed his hand to rest on her cheek.<\/p>\n

\u201cI should have come for you,\u201d he said quietly, a lump rising in his throat. \u201cYou should never have had to\u2026\u201d\u00a0 He stopped; his mind too weary to make his words match what his heart wanted to say.<\/p>\n

A few tears made their way down her cheeks, and he adjusted his position on the bed so that he was sitting right next to her. He pulled her into his arms and there she cried, her head against his chest. Ben pressed a kiss into the top of her head, gently rocking her as she cried. He almost smiled as he thought about his conversation with Father Fontenot the night before. You were right Father<\/em>, he mused, it was the same sun indeed.<\/em><\/p>\n

Chapter 32 \u2013 Between Brothers<\/strong>\u201cBenny? Johnny?\u201d Hoss called. He heard giggling behind a large, twisted old oak tree and sighed, crossing his arms. \u201cI know two little boys who are gonna be in a mighty big heap o\u2019trouble if they don\u2019t come when they\u2019re called\u2026 especially seein\u2019 as how they done run off without permission twice today\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

The giggling stopped suddenly, and two heads peered sheepishly around either side of the tree. Wide eyes stared at him repentantly.<\/p>\n

\u201cAlright, over here. Right now.\u201d Hoss raised his eyebrows, a bit annoyed, and waited.<\/p>\n

The two boys made their way to him, with a look on their faces that told Hoss they knew they were in trouble. One leg of Benny\u2019s overalls had a lump in it \u2013 a lump that would move every now and again. Hoss shook his head and put his hands on his hips.<\/p>\n

\u201cAlright\u2026 empty yer pockets. Both of ya.\u201d<\/p>\n

The boys looked at each other and each slowly stuffed a hand into his own pocket. Johnny presented a handful of crickets \u2013 now being mercilessly crunched together in his tiny fist. In both hands Benny held a rather large lizard. It squirmed its way free, and Benny scrambled to catch it again, but to no avail. It scurried away frantically, unwilling to give so much as a look back toward its captors.<\/p>\n

Seeing that the lizard was now gone and there was no use for the \u201cfood\u201d he had caught, Johnny tossed his handful of now half-dead crickets away. He studied the remaining cricket parts that clung his hand and shrugged, wiping them onto his pants.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019re sorry Hoss,\u201d Benny explained, \u201cWe didn\u2019t mean ta\u2019 run off again\u2026 we was just followin\u2019 the lizard\u2026. Guess we followed it a little farther than we reckoned to\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI guess you did,\u201d Hoss echoed, nodding. The action made him feel like his Pa and it was a little startling. He knelt in front of his small brothers. \u201cBoys, when yer older, you\u2019ll be able to run around on camping trips like ya want to. But right now, it just ain\u2019t safe. I don\u2019t want to have to tell you again to stay within sight of us. Ya hear?\u201d<\/p>\n

Both heads nodded and Hoss herded them on back towards the camp. As they neared the camp, they came across Adam whose face went from panicked worry to immediate relief when he took sight of the boys, their heads lowered shyly to the ground. He crossed his arms and looked down at them, raising an accusatory eyebrow.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhere<\/em> have you two been?\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss waved a hand at Adam before he had a chance to give them a second scolding. \u201cAh, they was followin\u2019 some critter\u2026 I done got on to\u2019em already.\u201d<\/p>\n

When the four returned to the campsite, they saw Joe comfortably leaning against a tree stump, his hat pulled down over his eyes. Adam and Hoss swapped annoyed glares. The men cleared their throats loudly and Joe awoke.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, I see you found them\u2026\u201d Joe observed calmly and replaced his hat over his eyes.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhudda\u2019 you mean leavin\u2019 it up to us to go look for them while yer here takin\u2019 a nap?\u201d Hoss asked, giving one of Joe\u2019s boots a hard nudge, upsetting his comfortable napping position.<\/p>\n

Joe lifted his hat again and shrugged, \u201cHey, I\u2019ve been looking after not one, but two<\/em> Bennies for the last few weeks. In that time, I\u2019ve hunted them down I don\u2019t know how many times. The way I see it\u2026 it\u2019s your turn, Brothers.\u201d\u00a0 He smiled broadly at them and leaned back against the tree stump.<\/p>\n

Hoss rolled his eyes and shook his head. He turned back to the boys, changing the subject. \u201cWell, it\u2019s mighty hot out here and I\u2019m thinkin\u2019 that creek looks like it\u2019s just the thing to cool me down. How bout ya\u2019ll?\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny and Johnny, who had been quite sure they were still in trouble, looked up at him with questioning faces. Suddenly, their frowns spread into toothy grins and they excitedly agreed that a swim in the creek was most decidedly in order. The boys ran ahead of their older brothers (taking care not to get out of their sight), whooping and giggling as they went.<\/p>\n

Adam nudged Hoss. \u201cThought we were gonna take\u2019em fishing?\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss shrugged. \u201cWe will but\u2026\u201d he laughed quietly, \u201cI figure if Johnny\u2019s anything like Benny \u2013 they\u2019ll both wind up fallin\u2019 in anyway. Might as well get\u2019em wet to start out with, don\u2019t\u2019cha think?\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam smiled, agreeing. He looked back over his shoulder at Joe who was already asleep again. He nodded to Hoss and the two decided with a grin that another brother of theirs could do with a cooling dip in the creek as well\u2026<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

\u201c… Get out the way old Dan Tucker, yer\u2019 too late to eat yer\u2019 supper!\u201d The brothers laughed together as they concluded the final chorus of the song.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t think we\u2019ve ever gotten through that before without forgettin\u2019 some of the words!\u201d Hoss said, still laughing.<\/p>\n

The night was cool but sticky. Bodies lounged around the campfire, each smiling contentedly. With the exception of the trilling locusts in the trees and the sound of the popping fire, silence settled over the campsite.<\/p>\n

At length, Adam spoke up. \u201cWell, who\u2019s next?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJohnny knows one!\u201d Benny offered, proudly volunteering his brother.<\/p>\n

All eyes turned to Johnny, who blushed slightly.<\/p>\n

\u201cWould you like to sing one?\u201d Adam asked and Johnny nodded. \u201cAnd what would you like to sing for us?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhispering Hope\u2026\u201d the six-year-old mumbled. \u201c\u2026My mama taught me\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, let\u2019s hear it\u2026\u201d Adam said, patting the boy\u2019s back.<\/p>\n

Johnny stood up sheepishly and took a deep breath. In a soft and slightly wavering voice he sang:<\/p>\n

\u201cSoft as the voice of an angel, breathing a lesson unheard,<\/em><\/p>\n

Hope, with a gentle persuasion, whispers her comforting word.<\/em><\/p>\n

Wait till the darkness is over; wait till the tempest is done.<\/em><\/p>\n

Hope for the sunshine tomorrow, after the shower is gone.<\/em><\/p>\n

Whispering Hope, oh how welcome thy voice,<\/em><\/p>\n

Making my heart, in its sorrow, rejoice.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

The melody was beautifully haunting and made for a rather somber mood amongst the older brothers.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat was right nice, Johnny,\u201d Hoss said, patting the boy on the back. \u201cYa said yer Mama taught you that song?\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny nodded. \u201cShe says it\u2019s a good song to sing when things ain\u2019t goin\u2019 so well\u2026\u201d The boy shrugged indicating the lesson had been a bit lost on him.<\/p>\n

Hoss nodded sadly. \u201cI reckon that\u2019ll come in handy someday\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Chapter 33 \u2013 Like Joseph<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat?\u201d Genevieve felt her stomach flutter with the shock of what she\u2019d just heard.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy not? Father Fontenot is here; the boys will be back soon\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

She nearly laughed at Ben\u2019s excitement. His face held a giddy smile she had not seen in many years.<\/p>\n

She smiled and found herself being infected with his merriment. She quickly shook the silly notions from her mind and attempted to address him rationally.<\/p>\n

\u201cBen\u2026 how can you suggest this after all that\u2019s happened? \u2013 how can you even think of forgiving me for all I\u2019ve done?\u201d\u00a0 Genevieve barely finished the question when she gave way to a coughing fit.<\/p>\n

Ben helped her sit up and sat next to her waiting for her spell to pass. She felt her chest tighten and she hurt all over. She suddenly wished he were not here with her \u2013 to see her like this. When her coughing ended and the waves of pain passed she fell back, exhausted, against her pillows. She closed her eyes, afraid to see the look of horror on his face \u2013 the same look her father had once had.<\/p>\n

She felt his hand on her forehead and she opened her eyes at last. She was surprised to see him smiling down at her. Not the giddy smile he\u2019d had before, but a comforting smile. He must have sensed her embarrassment because he didn\u2019t make mention of what had just happened. Instead, he continued with their conversation as he bathed her face with a cool, damp cloth.<\/p>\n

\u201cI think\u2026 we\u2019re both in need of a little forgiveness\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Genevieve studied his face, regarding him with an element of skepticism. Could this really be happening? She certainly had no right to be experiencing such happiness. It was probably only a dream.<\/p>\n

\u201cBen\u2026I doubt Father Fontenot would agree to marry us \u2013 again. Especially after the divorce and all\u2026\u201d she lowered her head sadly. It had been a romantic idea, but a silly one, nonetheless. What right had she to think she could end her life with any degree of happiness?<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, we won\u2019t know until we ask, will we?\u201d His smile faded and he touched her cheek softly. \u201cWe can\u2019t undo the mistakes we\u2019ve made\u2026 but we can keep from making them again. Gen \u2013 please \u2013 let\u2019s finish what we started\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

She looked solemnly into his face. He was right. They needed to do this \u2013 to do their best to fit the broken pieces of their lives back together as best they could. But doing that meant she had to trust him. Once upon a time she had trusted her father\u2026 Her mind argued with her heart. He is different. He will be strong and will stay to the end as he promised. Taking a deep inhalation, she nodded her silent, but heartfelt agreement.<\/p>\n

Ben smiled broadly and leaned toward her. A sudden commotion downstairs caught their attention, effectively ending their romantic moment, and Ben rose to investigate. Before he\u2019d crossed the room, the door burst open. Benny and Johnny ran in, happily chattering about their camp out.<\/p>\n

\u201cMama!\u201d Johnny bounded onto her bed, followed shortly by his twin. \u201cWe slept on the ground outside and I didn\u2019t even have to put a nightshirt on! \u2013 Ya just sleep in yer clothes when yer campin, ya know\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIs that so?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, an\u2019 we went fishin\u2019 and swimmin\u2019,\u201d Benny interrupted, \u201c\u2026course, that was all after Adam and Hoss threw Joe in the creek!\u201d<\/p>\n

The boys laughed, both excitedly talking over one another. Genevieve smiled and turned to Ben with a slight pleading look in her eyes. He nodded and stepped forward.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I\u2019m glad you all had fun,\u201d Ben said as he hushed them playfully with a finger to their lips. \u201cBut right now, your Mama and I have something we want to talk to the two of you about.\u201d<\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Jeanette dabbed at her eyes with a handkerchief as she looked around the room. It was an unconventional wedding to say the least, but a beautiful one, nonetheless. On one side of the bed Hoss stood holding Benny. Next to them was Joe. On the opposite side of the bed Adam stood behind Johnny, his hands resting on the boy\u2019s shoulders.<\/p>\n

On the bed, Ben sat next to Genevieve, one arm around her shoulders and the other holding one of her hands. Genevieve could not seem to stop smiling and Jeanette\u2019s heart warmed as she saw her sister truly happy for the first time in many years.<\/p>\n

She felt a hand on her arm, and she turned to see Father Fontenot offering her a little wink. The elderly man had had to reluctantly refuse to perform the wedding, but she knew he was happy for her sister. Jeanette was grateful to the priest for his steadfast loyalty to Genevieve, despite everything she had done. She saw a slightly impish glimmer in his eye, and she wondered if he hadn\u2019t known all along that things would turn out right in the end.<\/p>\n

\u201cI now pronounce you man and wife\u2026. again!\u201d The parson laughed as he closed his Bible.<\/p>\n

Ben leaned over and kissed Genevieve. Immediately the bedroom was filled with whoops and congratulatory chatter and hugs and hearty handshakes.<\/p>\n

Father Fontenot caught Jeanette\u2019s attention and motioned to the couple. She nodded and took his arm, helping him across the room. When they reached the bed, he placed a hand on Genevieve\u2019s head and murmured his traditional blessing. When he finished, he looked at Ben. The two seemed to have a moment of silent conversation before the priest finally spoke.<\/p>\n

\u201cMonsieur Cartwright, I want you \u2013 and your family \u2013 to know something.\u201d He paused and Jeanette knew he was struggling with his emotions. She gave his arm a little squeeze and he nodded his thanks to her. \u201cYou are not the only family to have overcome adversity \u2013 or to have endured hardships. Many experience these things, but few are able persevere. There was\u2026\u201d he raised a crooked finger in recollection, \u201c\u2026another family to have gone through many trials as you have \u2013 the family of Israel.\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeanette saw Benny\u2019s head snap to attention at this and she almost laughed. She knew how much the boy loved the familiar Bible story.<\/p>\n

\u201cGod has a purpose for everyone, to be certain\u2026 but some \u2013 some he sets aside for a special calling. You are more like Israel\u2019s family than you know.\u201d The old man turned to Joe. \u201cIsrael\u2019s wife had a son and named him Joseph\u2026 did you know that your name means \u2018may He add to me another son\u2019?\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe smiled as the old man turned to Ben. \u201cNot only did the Lord add to you another son \u2013 he added twins!\u201d<\/p>\n

There was a soft laughter in the room at his words as Benny and Johnny beamed with pride.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut Israel\u2019s happiness was not to last, for he lost his beloved wife and his son\u2026 But God was with them in everything. They\u2019re trials and struggles.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAn\u2019 in the end,\u201d Benny spoke up excitedly, \u201cJoseph found out all them bad things that happened was all s\u2018posed to help save a lot of people!\u201d<\/p>\n

The old man smiled at the boy and nodded. \u201cOui, little one, all things work out in His timing. A foolish person believes his struggles only to be a miserable end, but a wise person understands them to be merely a single thread in the larger tapestry of life.\u201d<\/p>\n

Benny cocked his head as though trying to understand the priest\u2019s words. Finally, he shrugged and turned to his father. \u201cSee, I told ya\u2019 the happy endin\u2019 don\u2019t make sense without all\u2019a the bad stuff!\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben stood, approaching the elderly man with an outstretched hand. \u201cThank you Father Fontenot \u2013 for everything.\u201d<\/p>\n

After the two shook hands, the old man addressed the room again. \u201cI must go now\u2026 \u2018May the Lord bless you and keep you. The Lord make his face to shine upon you and be gracious unto you. The Lord lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace. Amen.\u201d<\/p>\n

With that, Jeanette quietly ushered him and the local parson out of the room. Behind her, the bedroom filled with the undeniable sounds of a happy family.<\/p>\n

Chapter 34 \u2013 Whispering Hope<\/strong><\/p>\n

Soft, as the voice of an angel breathing a lesson unheard,<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ben glanced annoyingly up at the clock on the wall as he patted Genevieve\u2019s forehead with a damp cloth. Where is that doctor?<\/em><\/p>\n

Genevieve stirred slightly and he looked down at her. She looked like little more than a skeleton – the effect of her having refused any food for the last few days. She opened her eyes and he thought for a moment she would look at him. But the glazed look in her eye told him that she neither saw nor recognized anything. A pang of fear penetrated his gut. Would this be the night?<\/p>\n

Two weeks. That was all they\u2019d gotten. Two weeks of being a proper family. Not even two weeks at that. A week after their wedding her health took a dramatic turn for the worse. Overnight it seemed she had gone from bad to worse. These last few days and nights had been spent watching her body slowly succumb to death in such a painful way.<\/p>\n

The door opened and Ben rose quickly to greet the doctor.<\/p>\n

\u201cThank God\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Dr. Ford walked past him, forgoing a greeting. Ben watched him as he examined her, the faintest ember of hope still burning within him. Suddenly, Genevieve began to thrash weakly about on the bed. Both men moved quickly to restrain her but, in her fever- induced stupor, she fought as violently as her frail body would allow.<\/p>\n

\u201cMama!\u201d<\/p>\n

Before Ben could turn to see which of his small sons had entered, Dr. Ford pointed at the door and shouted, \u201cGet him out of here!\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s back was to the door and Genevieve\u2019s convulsions would not allow him to turn around. He heard heavy footsteps and a struggle. \u201cNo! Mama!\u201d\u00a0 All at once, the door slammed shut and the boy\u2019s cries died away.<\/p>\n

\u201cHold her,\u201d the doctor said gruffly as he turned to his medical bag.<\/p>\n

Ben did as he was told, shifting his eyes back and forth from his wife to the doctor. Dr. Ford mixed a bit of powder with a glass of water and held it to Genevieve\u2019s lips. After much difficulty, they got her to swallow a good amount of it. At length she settled.<\/p>\n

\u201cAbout all I can do now is just give her enough of this to take some of the pain away\u2026 Shouldn\u2019t be long now, I\u2019m afraid\u2026 I\u2019m sorry\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s throat constricted at the bluntness of the man\u2019s words. He stood numbly next to the bed looking at his wife\u2019s still body. After a long pause, the doctor spoke again.<\/p>\n

\u201cI think it would be alright for the boys to come in now\u2026I\u2019ll send them in if you\u2019d like\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Hope, with a gentle persuasion, whispers her comforting word.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cMama?\u201d Johnny touched her hand. \u201cMama?\u201d he repeated quietly.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe\u2019s gone son,\u201d Ben said hoarsely.<\/p>\n

The boy didn\u2019t respond, and Ben wondered if he understood. Johnny lowered his head to her chest, holding fast to her hand. He did not cry, nor did he speak. He just lay there. Ben could hardly stand it. Tears burned against his eyelids as he reached out to put a tender hand on the boy\u2019s head.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa?\u201d Ben felt a small hand on his arm, and he turned to see Benny. The child\u2019s eyes were filled with tears and held steadily on the sight of his mother on the bed.<\/p>\n

Ben lifted his son to his chest and Benny rested his head on his shoulder, creating a teary stain on Ben\u2019s shirt. He held Benny tightly in one arm, while his other hand continued to rest gently atop Johnny\u2019s head.<\/p>\n

There they stayed for a long while, each saying their own silent goodbyes.<\/p>\n

Wait till the darkness is over. Wait till the tempest is done.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life. Amen.\u201d<\/p>\n

The rest of the family answered Ben\u2019s recitation of the twenty-third Psalm with their own \u201cAmen.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben looked up at the sky. It was a gorgeous bright blue. It seemed terribly inappropriate for the sky to look so happy when their hearts were filled with sadness. He looked back at his sons.<\/p>\n

Hoss held Benny in his large arms. The boy had refused to even look at the grave and Ben couldn\u2019t blame him. He was actually rather surprised they were able to get through the last few days without Benny having an emotional fit. If the worst he did was refuse to look at the grave, that was all right by Ben. Hoss adjusted his brother\u2019s position, wrapping his arms more fully around him and Benny clung tightly to his neck.<\/p>\n

Adam and Joe stood next to Hoss, the cuffs of their pants muddied from digging the grave a few hours before. They both stared forlornly at the ground. Joe\u2019s hair looked disheveled and Adam was in need of a shave. Both served as a visual reminder to Ben of how hard the last couple of days had been on them all.<\/p>\n

He turned back to the grave. Johnny sat next to it in the mud, hugging his knees to his chest. Ben nodded to his grown sons. They returned the gesture and took their leave. Ben approached the boy and knelt next to him.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt hurts right here.\u201d Johnny said quietly, pointing to his stomach.<\/p>\n

\u201cI know\u2026\u201d Ben nodded, putting a hand on his son\u2019s shoulder. \u201cIt hurts there for me too.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShe\u2019s not coming back, is she?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo son\u2026 she\u2019s not.\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny nodded his understanding. \u201cGuess I thought when she went ta\u2019 heaven\u2026 she\u2019d just be there fer\u2019 a visit\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny looked up and Ben could see that he was crying. He was relieved to see his son shed his first tears over Genevieve\u2019s death. Ben put his arm around the boy and Johnny crumbled against his chest in sobs. He gathered the child in his arms and allowed him to cry. This was not the first time he had comforted a small boy at the graveside of his mother.<\/p>\n

Hope for the sunshine tomorrow, after the shower is gone.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

Ben came out of the house just as Hoss and Adam were loading the last of their luggage into the carriage. Across the yard, Ben could see Joe and Benny sitting under the shade of an old oak tree. He could hear them talking, but they were too far away for him to understand what they were saying. He had a pretty good idea what their conversation was about, and he was thankful his young sons had brothers who could talk about difficult things with them.<\/p>\n

\u201cAre we about ready?\u201d Ben asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, I reckon so\u2026 I\u2019ll go tell Benny an\u2019 Joe\u2026\u201d Hoss offered.<\/p>\n

Ben turned to Adam. \u201cWhere\u2019s Johnny?\u201d Adam nodded toward the back of the house and Ben frowned.<\/p>\n

As he rounded the house, Ben found Johnny placing a handful of crumpled flowers on his mother\u2019s grave. He approached quietly, not wanting to disturb him.<\/p>\n

\u201cSeems strange ta\u2019 just leave\u2019er here\u2026\u201d he mumbled, knowing his father stood behind him though he hadn\u2019t turned to see him.<\/p>\n

\u201cI know it does\u2026 We\u2019re ready to leave, but if you\u2019d like some more time here\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny shook his head and turned, looking up to Ben.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m ready\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded and took the boy by the hand and turned back to the house.<\/p>\n

\u201cYour Aunt Jeanette is waiting inside the house for you to say goodbye to her\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOkay\u2026<\/p>\n

The two walked slowly back to the house. Ben tried to resist the urge but couldn\u2019t help turning back for one last look at Genevieve\u2019s grave. Ben cleared his throat gruffly and pressed onward. It was time to go home.<\/p>\n

Whispering Hope, oh how welcome thy voice.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

The ranch house was quiet at last as Ben made his way from the dining room to his study. He sighed, shoving his hands into his pockets. It felt good to be home, but it also felt strange. Life had seemed to slow down considerably in the couple of weeks since they had returned to the Ponderosa. Johnny seemed to be adjusting to his new life on a ranch \u2013 though he still seemed sad and withdrawn. Ben knew it was only to be expected, though. Benny, however, was more than happy to get back to his familiar routine and took great pleasure in showing Johnny all of the advantages to living on the Ponderosa. Ben smiled as he recalled the look on Johnny\u2019s face when he was told that, as soon as he learned to ride well enough, he would be given a pony of his own.<\/p>\n

As was expected, a good deal of work had piled up in their absence and everyone was eager to get caught up. There were horses to be broken, timber contracts to bid for and preparations needed to be made for the fall that would soon be upon them.<\/p>\n

Ben stopped at his desk, his hands still in his pockets, and sighed again. Life goes on.<\/p>\n

The sound of laughter out in the yard pulled him from his thoughts. He crossed to the window and drew back the curtain. Benny and Johnny, who were supposed to be stacking firewood, had abandoned their chore for some sort of game. He saw Adam cross the yard and point sternly at them and then at the woodpile. He said something that Ben couldn\u2019t quite make it out. The boys nodded and returned to the woodpile, trying hard to suppress their giggling. Adam then returned to the other side of the yard where he had been helping Hoss and Joe repair the spokes of a wagon wheel.<\/p>\n

Ben chuckled softly and shook his head as he turned from the window. His older sons boasted about how much work they would be able to accomplish the following week when Benny and Johnny began attending school, but Ben knew better. Sure, they would get more work done, but he knew they would miss having the boys around all day.<\/p>\n

He sat down at his desk as his eyes scanned the mounds of paperwork that awaited his attention. Somewhere past the unending pile of receipts and ledgers sat three gold frames. He looked at each of them and frowned thoughtfully. He pulled open a few of the drawers before he found what he was looking for. At last, he withdrew a fourth gold frame. He held it for a moment, brushing away the dust with his fingers. He leaned over and set the frame next to the others. A faint but satisfied smile. Everyone was home at last.<\/p>\n

Making my heart, in its sorrow, rejoice.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

*****<\/p>\n

Epilogue<\/strong><\/p>\n

My child,<\/em><\/p>\n

As promised, I have been with you in everything. Even during the times when you felt no evidence of my presence, I was there \u2013 I am everywhere.<\/em><\/p>\n

I was there when you found her letter saying she was leaving. I helped steady your mind and voice as you broke the news to your family.I was present at their birth. It was I who caused one to be sick and one to remain healthy. Just as it was I who provided the doctor to restore health.<\/em><\/p>\n

I was with my servant, the priest, as he journeyed across the wilderness with your child. And it was I who caused the doctor\u2019s letter to be lost.I was with you on that evening when you received the shocking news of a new son. And I remained with you through those first six years of his life, giving you strength and wisdom in your old age to raise another child.<\/em><\/p>\n

I was the judge in the courtroom who dealt you the painful verdict that your son would be taken from you. But I was also the calming assurance that overcame you to help you realize you needed to persevere.<\/em><\/p>\n

I was there when you discovered yet another child. And I remained with you despite your unwillingness to forgive a sick woman. Even during your anger and self-pity, I was there.<\/em><\/p>\n

I was there when you listened to her story. You held her hand and offered her comfort; at the same time, I was holding your hand and offering you the same. It was I who broke your heart and helped you forgive. And I was there with you even as I called her home.<\/em><\/p>\n

I have been with you in everything. In my love for you I have blessed you many times over. I have entrusted you with five sons and you have not failed me. I gave you tears so that you might teach them how to grieve; I gave you a tender heart that you might teach them compassion; and I gave you a firm hand that you might teach them the consequences of foolish decisions. Because of your faithfulness they will go on to accomplish the many things I have planned for them. Their stories will be a continuation of your own.<\/em><\/p>\n

My child, your time draws near, but do not be fooled. Your journey is not yet complete. There are still things left for you to do. Do not be concerned, though, for I know the ending of your story. I have written it with my own hand. But in all things, remember this: I am with you. Always.<\/em><\/p>\n

The End<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Summary: The Cartwrights band together to help each other through a dark time of twists and turns.<\/p>\n

Rating: PG for adult issues and emotionally intense scenes \/\u00a0Words:\u00a0 \u00a058,425
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