{"id":48219,"date":"2018-08-31T05:40:02","date_gmt":"2018-08-31T09:40:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=48219"},"modified":"2026-04-14T11:10:13","modified_gmt":"2026-04-14T15:10:13","slug":"btr-sourdough-starters-04-august-2018-by-bztrailriders","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=48219","title":{"rendered":"BTR Sourdough Starters #04 &#8211; August 2018 (by BZTrailriders)"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Summary: &#8220;How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.&#8221; &#8211; Winnie the Pooh.\u00a0 Use this quote in a story of no more than 600 words.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Rating: G, Word Count: 2658<\/span><\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p class=\"author\"><span class=\"responsive-hide\">by\u00a0<strong><a class=\"username\" href=\"https:\/\/www.bonanzatrailriders.com\/memberlist.php?mode=viewprofile&amp;u=56\">Hart4Ben<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0\u00bb\u00a0<\/span>Thu Aug 02, 2018 2:40 pm<\/p>\n<div class=\"content\">Saying Goodbye<br \/>\n<em class=\"text-italics\">God only knows the struggle it\u2019s been to finally make this decision. One would think that my father and brothers would be happy to see me go with all the tension my presence has caused them over the past few years. Yet, I see the hurt and regret, maybe even guilt, in their eyes, especially Pa and Joe. I would have thought that Pa would have a better understanding given it was his dreaming that got us to the Ponderosa in the first place, but it seems like Hoss is the one that gets it. Or maybe it\u2019s just his easy temperament that loves with abandon and wants everyone to be happy. All I know is that now, when I\u2019m about to get on the stage and head to San Francisco, there is a twinge in my heart that I haven\u2019t felt in a while. Amazing what you can rationalize when you feel cheated. I cheated myself, when I came back after graduating from school, like I knew I would. I could have stayed in Boston and established myself, but I had a promise to keep. And I kept it, came back, and stayed longer than I should have. Looking back, it was my waffling and indecision that caused a lot of the problems. If you refuse to pull the burr from under the saddle, the irritation remains, and so do ill tempers.<\/em>Though it was unnecessary, Adam reined up Sport and dismounted to the side of the road. He had said his goodbyes at the ranch and told his family to pick up Sport the next time one of them was in town. The last thing Adam wanted was a scene at the stage office, and it felt unfair to put any of them in an awkward situation where they might feel obligated to do or say something that wasn\u2019t genuine.A lump rose in his throat as Adam looked back down the road he had just traveled. He knew from his experience in architecture the importance of having the right perspective. Suddenly things looked much different than they had just a few days ago. He was overcome with a sense of gratitude and thought,\u00a0<em class=\"text-italics\">how lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.<\/em>\u00a0Adam patted his horse in response to that feeling and acknowledging just how much he would miss his spirited, faithful mount, this land, and his family.<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>\n<p class=\"author\"><span class=\"responsive-hide\">by\u00a0<strong><a class=\"username\" href=\"https:\/\/www.bonanzatrailriders.com\/memberlist.php?mode=viewprofile&amp;u=54\">BettyHT<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0\u00bb\u00a0<\/span>Fri Aug 03, 2018 9:51 am<\/p>\n<div class=\"content\">\n<p>\u201cPa, in this world, there\u2019s so much that\u2019s no good that I want to say that when I\u2019m done passing through, I\u2019ve added some good and not done nothing to add to the misery any folks feel. Ifn I cain\u2019t do good, then I guess I shouldn\u2019t do nothing at all.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHoss, don\u2019t you think sometimes hard choices force us to do things that otherwise we would rather not do?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI guess maybe that could happen, but seems to me ifn we tried harder, we could always have found a better way, one that woulda done no harm, dontcha think?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI don\u2019t know. I\u2019m remembering those sheepherders who took Adam hostage. I know I didn\u2019t handle that well, but, honestly, even if I had gotten the sheriff, that bunch was trouble. Maybe they would have hurt Roy if he had gone out there to try to move them on.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa, we had more than a hundred men working for us at the time. Ifn we had shown up with a force to be reckoned with, they woulda moved on peacefully especially if you had given permission for them to take that shortcut across our land.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Bristling at that, Ben wanted to retort quickly but forced himself to hold back and think about it. He knew that some of his neighbors had turned to raising sheep on their rougher pastures especially at the higher elevations and had found that it was a myth that they destroyed the grass. As long as they were moved to where there was enough to eat, they did eat the grass lower than what cows did, but his neighbors had found that they could move sheep into a pasture that cows had already grazed and the sheep could graze successfully. When he finally responded, he noted the small smile Hoss couldn\u2019t hold back. \u201cYes, you\u2019re probably right about that.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah, it can be hard to see things straight when we\u2019re mad. Happened to me too. Ifn I\u2019d a talked to Adam before I hit him instead of the day after, I woulda known what happened with Regan. I still wouldn\u2019t have liked him interfering like he did, but I woulda understood what happened.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou\u2019re a very forgiving man, Hoss.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s what we\u2019re supposed to do, ain\u2019t it, Pa? Ifn we want it from folks, we gotta give it to \u2018em too. I shur would hate it ifn people held every little thing I ever did wrong against me. I try to forgive and forget \u2018cept the forgettin\u2019 can be a mite hard at times.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI can understand that. You would have to be a saint to forget all the wrongs that have been done to you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThey all make us what we are, don\u2019t they, Pa? I wouldn\u2019t be who I am without all that\u2019s happened. I guess I learned something from each and every one of them.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, you did, Hoss. Yes, you did.\u201d Ben put his hand on the large pine box and dropped his head as the memory of his blue-eyed son with the infectious smile and booming laugh filled his heart. He had been reliving each and every conversation he could remember having with Hoss wanting to imprint them on his mind so he could never forget. He had done this three times before with his wives, but it was so much harder to bury a son. Yet the same thought was there. How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard. I have the love of a son gone too soon. The tears came then.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>\n<p class=\"author\"><span class=\"responsive-hide\">by\u00a0<strong><a class=\"username-coloured\" href=\"https:\/\/www.bonanzatrailriders.com\/memberlist.php?mode=viewprofile&amp;u=48\">AC1830<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0\u00bb\u00a0<\/span>Mon Aug 06, 2018 9:56 pm<\/p>\n<div class=\"content\">\n<p>A Time to Heal<\/p>\n<p>On a warm, sunny summer day, two horsemen rode through Ponderosa pines and out into a flower-filled meadow. The chestnut and buckskin toss their heads, indicating they were enjoying the ride as much as their masters.<\/p>\n<p>Ben looked over at his seventeen year old son, pleased to see color on his face and a smile in his eyes. After Marie\u2019s death, Ben had been so devastated that he\u2019d abandoned his sons for his grief. Now he was back and taking a promised ride with his eldest son, a day just for them.*<\/p>\n<p>They\u2019d been riding for while when Ben suggested they take a break and enjoy the lunch their new cook, and friend, Hop Sing* had prepared for them.<\/p>\n<p>As father and son ate, they shared their memories of Marie, letting their hearts heal. Ben noticed how quiet Adam had gotten. He waited, watching a deer cross the meadow. Finally Adam spoke.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI know I didn\u2019t welcome Marie when she came and for a long time after. I cheated myself of her love, like I knew I would but at the time I didn\u2019t care. That first Christmas was when I realized she loved me anyway. We talked a lot that night and\u2026. worked things out.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam voice drifted off as he recalled her patience and gentle words that night.<\/p>\n<p>Ben remembered the change in both his son and his wife that Christmas. He took it as an answer to prayer. Standing and stretching he spoke quietly, \u201cHow about we ride some more, son?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Together they slowly made their way to the lake as the sun began to slide toward the mountains.<\/p>\n<p>After watching a few waterfowl dive for fish they headed up to the place where Marie rested.<\/p>\n<p>Tears were openly shed as Ben asked forgiveness for burying himself in his grief. Adam freely gave it then moved to sit by the grave. After remaining silent for a good while Adam touched his forehead to the cold stone and whispered to her, \u201cHow lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard. I love you Marie. I always will.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>As the sun slipped behind the gray mountains, a breeze stirred. A hand gently rested on Adam\u2019s shoulder, solidifying the bond between father and son in that moment. Once the sun was gone Adam stood and rested his arm on his father\u2019s shoulders. Ben reciprocated the gesture.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s time to go home, Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>\n<p class=\"author\"><span class=\"responsive-hide\">by\u00a0<strong><a class=\"username\" href=\"https:\/\/www.bonanzatrailriders.com\/memberlist.php?mode=viewprofile&amp;u=58\">AH83<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0\u00bb\u00a0<\/span>Wed Aug 15, 2018 10:30 pm<\/p>\n<div class=\"content\">\n<p>Adam pushed the cattle on ignoring the sounds of the ranch hands who were whistling and making noises at the cattle. His thoughts were on Emma. He missed her. They had only been married two months and this was the first time they had been apart for a long time.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAdam.\u201d Hoss called out. Adam turned to his brother.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah?\u201d He responded gruffly.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAre you all right? You seem distant.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m fine.\u201d Hoss nodded but didn\u2019t believe his older brother.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLet\u2019s get these cattle grazing and bedded down for the night,\u201d Adam said looking at the sunset. Hoss nodded again and went to do as his brother said. Adam helped get the cattle together and set up camp.<\/p>\n<p>Adam had first watch of the night. He walked around the camp and started thinking about Emma. He ached for her.<br \/>\nBen was to have gone on the cattle drive but had gotten into an accident and broke his leg. Emma told Adam to go and she\u2019d take care of Ben. They had talked about it at home that night.<br \/>\n<em class=\"text-italics\"><br \/>\n\u201cI\u2019ll miss you. This will be the first time since being married we\u2019ll be apart for so long,\u201d Adam said.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll miss you, too but this cattle drive is important and needs to be done.\u201d Emma snuggled up to Adam.<\/p>\n<p>He held her tight and breathed her in. She smelled of lavender.<\/p>\n<p>Adam heard a twig snap and swung his gun on the noise. It was Hoss. \u201cSorry, Adam, I didn\u2019t mean to scare you. I\u2019m here to relieve you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam lowered his gun<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou all right?\u201d Hoss asked.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cFine.\u201d Adam replied.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou miss Emma, don\u2019t you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam turned and looked at Hoss.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOf course I do. This is the first time we\u2019ve been apart. If Pa hadn\u2019t hurt himself I\u2019d be home and he\u2019d be here. We\u2019ve only been married two months. It\u2019s hard to be away.\u201d Adam tried to not raise his voice at his brother.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI know it is.\u201d Hoss said softly.<\/p>\n<p>Adam sighed. \u201cI\u2019m sorry, Hoss.\u201d He patted his brother\u2019s shoulder and walked away.<\/p>\n<p>The first week after the boys left, Emma spent the day at the store then helped with Ben at night. Hop Sing cared for Ben while Emma was away. Ben noticed Emma became tired as time went on because she was too busy. He suggested closing the store while she took care of him. At first Emma argued because it kept her from missing<br \/>\nAdam, but then realized he was right and she closed the store.<\/p>\n<p>She was lonely for Adam. When she wasn\u2019t busy helping Ben, she\u2019d be thinking of Adam. She would cry at night with the ache of missing him. Emma hoped that when Adam would help with the cattle drives in the future that it would be easier to let him go.<\/p>\n<p>The cattle drive had finally ended and they were all heading home. Adam was anxious to get home. It had felt like ages until they got home. The Ponderosa loomed before them and Adam sped to the house.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cEmma! Emma!\u201d he called out.<\/p>\n<p>Emma heard Adam\u2019s voice and ran outside.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAdam!\u201d she squealed and ran to his outstretched arms.<\/p>\n<p>He caught her and spun her around. &#8220;It\u2019s so good to see you. You are so beautiful.\u00a0How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard,&#8221; Adam said and kissed her.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI feel lucky too. I love you, Adam.\u201d Emma whispered in his ear as she hugged him tight.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>\n<p class=\"author\">\u00a0<span class=\"responsive-hide\">by\u00a0<strong><a class=\"username\" href=\"https:\/\/www.bonanzatrailriders.com\/memberlist.php?mode=viewprofile&amp;u=70\">Tampa<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0\u00bb\u00a0<\/span>Sat Aug 18, 2018 10:03 pm<\/p>\n<div class=\"content\">Moving Forward<br \/>\n\u201cYou should see him, Elizabeth. Of course, you do see him. I know you do. It&#8217;s just that he&#8217;s growing so quickly. He still seems so tiny and fragile in my hands but when he smiles at me, I see the wisdom of Solomon in his eyes. I wish I could ask him what he&#8217;s thinking about, but I&#8217;m pretty sure he&#8217;s smarter than me.\u201dBen adjusted his position on the grass. The ground still retained some of the moisture from the previous day&#8217;s rain which left him with dampened pants. But the sky was a vivid blue, the clouds danced in the light breeze, and the sun was warm on his back. Using his finger, he traced the name on the tombstone, Elizabeth Stoddard Cartwright. A tear ran down his cheek. This might be the last visit he could make to the graveyard before leaving Boston. He ran his hand over the velvety softness of the pansies he had planted. Elizabeth&#8217;s favorite flower. He&#8217;d been making a mental list he could share with Adam about his mother until the two of them were able to return for a visit.\u201cI\u2019m not as good at this as you would be. In fact, I&#8217;m certain I do everything wrong. I know I hold him wrong. I might even feed him wrong, but your father and I muddle through. Abel has truly risen to the occasion. You would be so proud of him. He has appointed himself honorary spit-up cleaner. He feels it&#8217;s more dignified than changing diapers. When you grow up on a farm, you don&#8217;t think much about it. But, for a city boy who went to sea, diapers must be terrifying.\u201d Ben chuckled.\u201cDarling, we&#8217;re leaving next week. It&#8217;s time to start off in search of our dream. I hired Mrs. Callahan to come along with us until Adam is old enough to&#8230;.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Old enough to what? He knew nothing about babies. Not really. It was remarkable that Mrs. Callahan was tagging along with him on this adventure. His plans seemed as insubstantial as onion skin. How long would it take them to go west? Probably a year. Would his money hold out? What would happen if it didn&#8217;t? Anxiety descended upon him.<\/p>\n<p>Was it possible that he was the biggest fool in Boston? Here he was with his own business, a father-in-law who gladly shared responsibility for his son, a fine woman like Mrs. Callahan, Elizabeth&#8217;s friends who assisted when needed, and a late wife he still felt deeply connected to. Why was he leaving all this? To seek out a dream that suddenly seemed shallow and childish when he compared it to what he would surely lose. Saying good-bye to Elizabeth and Abel now was wrong. His life was here. His dreams would wait until Adam was old enough to travel.<\/p>\n<p>But in his heart, he knew if he waited for Adam to be older, then it would become a question of how much older, and going west would be repeatedly postponed until it would never happen. Therefore, the decision must be made right now with finality, without panic.<\/p>\n<p>He looked up. \u201cElizabeth, what should I do?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>There was a breath of air and calmness swept over him, erasing all doubt. He was grateful to those he loved who were so much a part of his life. Yet, it was time for him to stop worrying and begin moving forward. No matter how difficult, he must say good-bye to all of them. &#8216;How lucky I am,&#8217; he mused, &#8216;to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.&#8217;<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><span style=\"font-family: 'Comic Sans MS', sans-serif;\">A Note from the Brandsters.\u00a0 This was originally written and published on the Bonanza Trail Riders site.\u00a0 Brand is happy to offer this story a new home.<\/span><\/div>\n<div class=\"pvc_clear\"><\/div>\n<p id=\"pvc_stats_48219\" class=\"pvc_stats all  \" data-element-id=\"48219\" style=\"\"><i class=\"pvc-stats-icon medium\" aria-hidden=\"true\"><svg xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" version=\"1.0\" viewBox=\"0 0 502 315\" preserveAspectRatio=\"xMidYMid meet\"><g transform=\"translate(0,332) scale(0.1,-0.1)\" fill=\"\" stroke=\"none\"><path d=\"M2394 3279 l-29 -30 -3 -207 c-2 -182 0 -211 15 -242 39 -76 157 -76 196 0 15 31 17 60 15 243 l-3 209 -33 29 c-26 23 -41 29 -80 29 -41 0 -53 -5 -78 -31z\"\/><path d=\"M3085 3251 c-45 -19 -58 -50 -96 -229 -47 -217 -49 -260 -13 -295 52 -53 146 -42 177 20 16 31 87 366 87 410 0 70 -86 122 -155 94z\"\/><path d=\"M1751 3234 c-13 -9 -29 -31 -37 -50 -12 -29 -10 -49 21 -204 19 -94 39 -189 45 -210 14 -50 54 -80 110 -80 34 0 48 6 76 34 21 21 34 44 34 59 0 14 -18 113 -40 219 -37 178 -43 195 -70 221 -36 32 -101 37 -139 11z\"\/><path d=\"M1163 3073 c-36 -7 -73 -59 -73 -102 0 -56 133 -378 171 -413 34 -32 83 -37 129 -13 70 36 67 87 -16 290 -86 209 -89 214 -129 231 -35 14 -42 15 -82 7z\"\/><path d=\"M3689 3066 c-15 -9 -33 -30 -42 -48 -48 -103 -147 -355 -147 -375 0 -98 131 -148 192 -74 13 15 57 108 97 206 80 196 84 226 37 273 -30 30 -99 39 -137 18z\"\/><path d=\"M583 2784 c-38 -19 -67 -74 -58 -113 9 -42 211 -354 242 -373 16 -10 45 -18 66 -18 51 0 107 52 107 100 0 39 -1 41 -124 234 -80 126 -108 162 -133 173 -41 17 -61 16 -100 -3z\"\/><path d=\"M4250 2784 c-14 -9 -74 -91 -133 -183 -95 -150 -107 -173 -107 -213 0 -55 33 -94 87 -104 67 -13 90 8 211 198 130 202 137 225 78 284 -27 27 -42 34 -72 34 -22 0 -50 -8 -64 -16z\"\/><path d=\"M2275 2693 c-553 -48 -1095 -270 -1585 -649 -135 -104 -459 -423 -483 -476 -23 -49 -22 -139 2 -186 73 -142 361 -457 571 -626 285 -228 642 -407 990 -497 242 -63 336 -73 660 -74 310 0 370 5 595 52 535 111 1045 392 1455 803 122 121 250 273 275 326 19 41 19 137 0 174 -41 79 -309 363 -465 492 -447 370 -946 591 -1479 653 -113 14 -422 18 -536 8z m395 -428 c171 -34 330 -124 456 -258 112 -119 167 -219 211 -378 27 -96 24 -300 -5 -401 -72 -255 -236 -447 -474 -557 -132 -62 -201 -76 -368 -76 -167 0 -236 14 -368 76 -213 98 -373 271 -451 485 -162 444 86 934 547 1084 153 49 292 57 452 25z m909 -232 c222 -123 408 -262 593 -441 76 -74 138 -139 138 -144 0 -16 -233 -242 -330 -319 -155 -123 -309 -223 -461 -299 l-81 -41 32 46 c18 26 49 83 70 128 143 306 141 649 -6 957 -25 52 -61 116 -79 142 l-34 47 45 -20 c26 -10 76 -36 113 -56z m-2057 25 c-40 -58 -105 -190 -130 -263 -110 -324 -59 -707 132 -981 25 -35 42 -64 37 -64 -19 0 -241 119 -326 174 -188 122 -406 314 -532 468 l-58 71 108 103 c185 178 428 349 672 473 66 33 121 60 123 61 2 0 -10 -19 -26 -42z\"\/><path d=\"M2375 1950 c-198 -44 -350 -190 -395 -379 -18 -76 -8 -221 19 -290 114 -284 457 -406 731 -260 98 52 188 154 231 260 27 69 37 214 19 290 -38 163 -166 304 -326 360 -67 23 -215 33 -279 19z\"\/><\/g><\/svg><\/i> <img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"16\" height=\"16\" alt=\"Loading\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/plugins\/page-views-count\/ajax-loader-2x.gif?resize=16%2C16&#038;ssl=1\" border=0 \/><\/p>\n<div class=\"pvc_clear\"><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Summary: &#8220;How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.&#8221; &#8211; Winnie the Pooh.\u00a0 Use this quote in a story of no more than 600 words.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Rating: G, Word Count: 2658<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":12475,"featured_media":62121,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"template-full-width-post.php","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1323],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-48219","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sourdough","wpcat-1323-id"],"a3_pvc":{"activated":true,"total_views":2,"today_views":2},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/BTR.png?fit=442%2C255&ssl=1","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":29102,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=29102","url_meta":{"origin":48219,"position":0},"title":"Thoughts on Leaving &#8211; a poem (by KateP)","author":"KateP","date":"May 1, 2003","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary:\u00a0 A Bonanza poem, the title explains it all. Rating:\u00a0 G\u00a0 \u00a0(240 words)","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poetry&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poetry","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=9"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/Adam-traurig.jpg?fit=768%2C576&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/Adam-traurig.jpg?fit=768%2C576&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/Adam-traurig.jpg?fit=768%2C576&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/Adam-traurig.jpg?fit=768%2C576&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":36771,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=36771","url_meta":{"origin":48219,"position":1},"title":"Always One More (by BettyHT)","author":"BettyHT","date":"May 21, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary:\u00a0 A What Happened Instead for The Decision.\u00a0 What if the doctor wasn\u2019t able to do the surgery?\u00a0 Ben recalls conversations he has had with Hoss and the best of his middle son's attributes. Rating: PG\u00a0 Word count: 1243","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Alternate Universe&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Alternate Universe","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/The-Decision.jpg?fit=600%2C439&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/The-Decision.jpg?fit=600%2C439&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/The-Decision.jpg?fit=600%2C439&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":6278,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=6278","url_meta":{"origin":48219,"position":2},"title":"The Final Goodbye (by JudyW)","author":"JudyW","date":"May 3, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary:\u00a0 Just my feelings on how Adam may have come back to the Ponderosa. (Warning: character death) \u00a0 Rated:\u00a0K (3,670 words) The Final Goodbye series, links to all the stories within the series included.","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Adam \/ Joe&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Adam \/ Joe","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=1091"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/Friendship-4.jpg?fit=500%2C373&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":4454,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=4454","url_meta":{"origin":48219,"position":3},"title":"How To Say Goodbye (by JoeC)","author":"JoeC","date":"February 28, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary: There comes a time when we need to say goodbye to a beloved person \u00a0 Rating: K+ WC 1300 Warnings: Character death","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Alternate Universe&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Alternate Universe","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/benb.jpg?fit=306%2C327&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":48211,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=48211","url_meta":{"origin":48219,"position":4},"title":"BTR Sourdough Starters #01 &#8211; May 2018 (by BZTrailriders)","author":"BZTrailRiders","date":"May 31, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary: In 2018, BTR started a writing challenge call Sourdough Starters. A Sourdough Starter is the Yeast that will activate the Dough that will be Baked into Bread. This was used in the 1800's and is still used today. BTR's take was to use it as a \"Starter\" for a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Sourdough Starter&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Sourdough Starter","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=1323"},"img":{"alt_text":"Preserving Their Legacy","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/BTR.png?fit=442%2C255&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":7057,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=7057","url_meta":{"origin":48219,"position":5},"title":"Last Chance (by Cheaux)","author":"Cheaux","date":"May 6, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary:\u00a0 Joe gambles with his life to give his Pa something precious. Rated:\u00a0 K \u00a0WC \u00a0900","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Ben \/ Joe&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Ben \/ Joe","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=1015"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/The-day.jpg?fit=400%2C600&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/48219","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/12475"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=48219"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/48219\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":64288,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/48219\/revisions\/64288"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/62121"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=48219"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=48219"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=48219"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}