{"id":48221,"date":"2018-09-30T08:16:13","date_gmt":"2018-09-30T12:16:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=48221"},"modified":"2026-04-14T11:10:33","modified_gmt":"2026-04-14T15:10:33","slug":"btr-sourdough-starters-05-september-2018-by-bztrailriders","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=48221","title":{"rendered":"BTR Sourdough Starters #05 – September 2018 (by BZTrailriders)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Summary: He\/She looked beyond my faults and saw my needs. – Dottie Rambo. Write a story of 600 words or less using this line from a song.<\/span><\/p>\n

Rating: G, Word Count: 2248<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

\u00a0by\u00a0BettyHT<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0\u00bb\u00a0<\/span>Sat Sep 01, 2018 9:58 am<\/p>\n

\n

Once more as Ben tried to sleep, he heard that light tread in the hallway and knew which son was walking down those stairs. He guessed if he waited, in a short time, he would hear the sound of a horse walking slowly from the yard. Too considerate to ride out wildly and wake his family, he would likely wait until he was well away from the house to give his horse free rein to run. Tonight Ben wasn\u2019t going to wait though. It had been going on too long, and it was time for him to stop torturing himself with doubts and recrimination. Standing, he pulled on his robe and slipped his feet into his slippers. With any luck, he would catch up to him before he left the house. He did. He saw the dark shadow sitting on the last steps pulling on his boots and moved to intercept him. Never moving as silently as any of his sons, he must have been heard.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry if I woke you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI was still awake. I\u2019ve heard you leave almost every night. Even if I didn\u2019t, the way you look in the morning would have made me worry enough.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry about that too.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s nothing for you to be sorry about. You have been doing too much of that already it seems.\u201d When his son was quiet, Ben continued. He wanted to get this conversation into the crux of the matter instead of dancing around it.<\/p>\n

\u201cI thought you said you didn\u2019t love her. I thought you said it was better that she went with Will.\u201d<\/p>\n

That made Adam drop his head. He wouldn\u2019t lie again to his father. The emotions and thoughts he had were a jumbled mix of love, jealousy, anger, regret, relief, sorrow, and confusion. No matter how much he thought about the situation, he couldn\u2019t find a logical, rational explanation for what had happened. He had helped her, offered her love and security, and treated her with respect and consideration. Her response had been to go behind his back and seek a relationship with another.<\/p>\n

Sitting down on the steps above where Adam sat in the darkness, Ben thought carefully before speaking.<\/p>\n

\u201cEveryone has needs, faults, desires, and wants. When we meet someone, we hope they see the better parts of us.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAll Laura ever seemed to want to do was change me. She pointed out my faults rather regularly.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, and it seemed she made her needs quite obvious so you would hasten to fulfill those for her.\u201d Ben paused not certain Adam would accept him criticizing Laura, but Adam was silent. \u201cI think you remember when I met Inger. It was a tough time for me, but she looked beyond my faults and saw my needs.\u201d<\/p>\n

Staring into the darkness, Adam thought about that for a few minutes as Ben waited to hear how he would respond. \u201cBut Laura saw my faults and her needs.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI think you\u2019ve got it now.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI loved her, but she didn\u2019t love me. She was too in love with herself.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, and I love my nephew, but he can be shallow and that quality is present there too. He thinks of himself first much too often. He\u2019s better prepared to live a life with Laura than you could ever be.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBecause they\u2019re on a more even footing.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes. Can we go back to bed now? I\u2019m tired.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThank you, Pa. I may be able to sleep now.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

<\/div>\n
\n

by\u00a0AC1830<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0\u00bb\u00a0<\/span>Sun Sep 02, 2018 4:51 pm<\/p>\n

\n

Looking Beyond<\/p>\n

The soft rustle of her skirts and quiet footsteps alerted him to her presence.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam?\u201d<\/p>\n

He kept silent, wanting her to just go away.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, I know you are up there. I cannot climb up so please come down.\u201d<\/p>\n

Sighing, twelve year old Adam eased himself to the edge of the loft and slowly climbed down. He stood stiffly at the bottom of the ladder.<\/p>\n

\u201cCome, sit beside me.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam moved toward the bench but did not sit.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa told me to apologize to you and I did. What more do you want?\u201d<\/p>\n

Marie closed her eyes for a moment to gather her thoughts, absentmindedly rubbing a spot where the baby kicked. Oh she wanted so much more. Despite Adam\u2019s coldness to her she loved the boy, and she wanted so much for him to love her.<\/p>\n

\u201cYour apology lacked a certain truth to it Adam. Yes, those women at the station were rude to me, spreading lies about me and your father. Those were words you should never have heard.\u201d Marie took Adam\u2019s fingers lightly in hers and was pleased when he didn\u2019t pull away. \u201cDo you know why your father married me?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt doesn\u2019t matter.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh but it does. I was angry and bitter at what life had thrown at me. No one cared about me. I did what I had to do to support myself. I used my beauty to lure men to drink and to gamble, but I never used it for what those women said.\u201d She softened her voice, \u201cI\u2019d never felt love until I met your father. He told me I was better than what I appeared to be.\u00a0He looked beyond my faults and saw my needs. I needed love and he gave it freely. After that I cared for nothing more than to be with him and to leave my old life behind.\u201d<\/p>\n

She pulled Adam closer but he refused to look at her. \u201cThat is love, Adam. I know those women\u2019s words shocked you and perhaps the shock kept you from stepping in. But today I saw something else in your eyes, something that I believe has been there all along but needs to grow.\u201d Marie tilted Adam\u2019s face up, and gently rubbed his cheeks with her fingers. \u201cWe all make mistakes, mon petit, but we have to look past them to find what is truly good in a person.\u201d<\/p>\n

Marie studied her step-son\u2019s face, leaned forward to kiss his forehead then smiled at him. \u201cJe t’aime mon cher.\u201d<\/p>\n

She stood up and left the barn. Adam watched as she slowly made her way to the house. A single tear found its way down his cheek. As he wiped it away he realized a warmth had filled his heart. Soon one corner of his mouth quirked upward, gently revealing a dimple and reaching his eyes. The warmth spread as Marie\u2019s words watered the seed of love that was there, allowing it to take root.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

<\/div>\n
\n

by\u00a0Hart4Ben<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0\u00bb\u00a0<\/span>Sun Sep 02, 2018 8:21 pm<\/p>\n

\n

A missing scene from The Gold Plated Rifle<\/p>\n

Home<\/strong>
\nWith the rake in his hands, Jamie paused, watching to make certain that Ben rode off. He went back to tossing the straw from the stalls with a vengeance.<\/p>\n

Why\u2019d he come here lookin\u2019 for me anyway? Just another stray dog to kick around when I do somethin\u2019 wrong. I even fessed up to it and he still punished me! He thinks I need them enough to put up with that. I’ll show him who needs who!<\/em><\/p>\n

Jamie threw the rake and fell back against the side wall of the empty stall. Sliding down to a crouch, elbows on his knees, fingers in his unruly red waves, the tears began to flow. He reached to touch his vest pocket and felt his father\u2019s watch chain that Ben had gone to the trouble to return. But it was Ben\u2019s parting words that ran through his mind like a speeding train and weighed heavy on his heart more so than any words anyone had spoken to him since his father had died.<\/p>\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t pick my sons. They were born to me, but I did pick you. I didn\u2019t haveta, but I did. You might consider that a point in your favor. Hoss, and Joe, and I want you to be a part of our family. And if you are a part of our family, you\u2019re going to have to give up something, worrying about yourself. You and your problems won\u2019t always be the center of attention because we have our problems, too. And you may have to worry about them! And if you do have a problem, don\u2019t whine and mumble and feel sorry for yourself because no one has turned around. I may be busy or just plumb tired; so speak up! To my certain knowledge, we don\u2019t have a single mind reader on the Ponderosa — but we do have a wealth of affection to give ya — respect and understanding, but you have to give them back. They\u2019re all there, but they\u2019re on a two-way street. And if you come back, and I sure hope you do, because I want you to, I\u2019m going to treat you exactly as I\u2019d treat one of my own sons, which means that sometimes I\u2019ll tell you to do things that you won\u2019t like — because I know more than you do, I\u2019m older. It\u2019s as simple as that. I try to be fair, but sometimes I make mistakes; so you might as well expect them because I\u2019m also human. Now, so far, I don\u2019t think I\u2019ve been unfair; so if you decide to come back, the woodcutting stands. You\u2019ll just have to accept that discipline voluntarily, along with everything else we have to give ya\u2026.You think about it, Jamie. The door will be wide open.\u201d
\n<\/strong><\/p>\n

I guess he did come outta his way for me. Said he\u2019s got faults and troubles, too. Guess I was only seeing what I wanted to see, but\u00a0he looked beyond my faults and saw my needs.<\/strong>\u00a0It\u2019s hard to admit that you need something like a family when you wanta be your own boss and run your own life. But that gets tiresome — real tiresome and lonely.<\/em><\/p>\n

Jamie looked up at the loft where he would sleep this evening and thought about the comfortable bed with clean sheets at the ranch house at the Ponderosa. He could almost smell the tasty, hot breakfast Hop Sing would prepare for the family — his family. He went and gathered his sparse possessions together and saddled his horse. He scribbled a note to the livery man, mounted up, and rode for — home — a word that he had never before understood the true meaning.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

<\/div>\n
\n

by\u00a0AH83<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0\u00bb\u00a0<\/span>Thu Sep 13, 2018 11:50 pm<\/p>\n

\n

Mary slammed the door and threw her books on the chair with a thump.<\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t slam the door,\u201d Emma said sternly.<\/p>\n

She looked up from her mending and saw Mary was frustrated.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s wrong?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNothing,\u201d Mary mumbled.<\/p>\n

\u201cNothing? Come on, something is wrong. You have never thrown your books like that.\u201d<\/p>\n

Mary sighed then sat down.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s Mrs. Mangum.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat did she do now?\u201d Emma asked in a tight voice.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t want to say,\u201d Mary replied looking at her mother.<\/p>\n

Emma put her mending down and moved next to Mary on the sofa.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou can tell me,\u201d she said gently.<\/p>\n

Tears filled Mary\u2019s eyes.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe said things about you and Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLike what?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShe said that Pa only stays with you because he doesn\u2019t want to tarnish the Cartwright name. Because you couldn\u2019t give him children. She even said that you were undesirable because you were engaged to another man and he broke it off and Pa only married you to save face.\u201d<\/p>\n

Mary sobbed into Emma\u2019s shoulder. Emma held her and rubbed her back.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, Mary, you shouldn\u2019t listen to her. Or anyone else who says things against your pa or me. Did you know that I asked him some of those questions when we were courting and even after we were married?\u201d
\nMary sat up in surprise.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo.\u201d<\/p>\n

Emma pulled out a handkerchief and dabbed away Mary\u2019s tears.<\/p>\n

\u201cI worked at the mercantile and heard Mrs. Mangum say a few things that weren\u2019t true. She\u2019ll talk to anyone who will listen and find fault with everything. Every time she\u2019d come into the store, she\u2019d gossip about me and eventually your father when he started working there.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDid you tell Pa what she said?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI did. I had wondered if he worked there because he felt sorry for me. Mrs. Mangum said that he worked there because nobody wanted to work with me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShe what? How could she?\u201d Mary\u2019s voice went up an octave.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe did. I heard so much that it made me wonder about his motives. I was pretty worried when I finally questioned him on it, and he told me that he worked with me because he wanted to. You see, I moved here from California after my family passed away. I was also dealing with a former beau and it was a mess. We have told you about our daughter Elizabeth and how she died of the croup. Then you came here at the time I had to tell him about losing our second baby. I was so worried about not being able to carry anymore children and told him so. Your Pa was so gentle and understanding through all of those times.\u00a0He looked beyond my faults and saw my needs<\/strong>.\u201d Emma squeezed Mary\u2019s hand. \u201cHe knew our love was the most important thing in our lives. So, don\u2019t listen to Mrs. Mangum.\u201d<\/p>\n

Mary smiled and squeezed her mother back.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m glad you both didn\u2019t listen to Mrs. Mangum. I\u2019ll learn not to either. Thanks, Ma.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
A Note from the Brandsters.\u00a0 This was originally written and published on the Bonanza Trail Riders site.\u00a0 Brand is happy to offer this story a new home.<\/span><\/div>\n
<\/div>\n

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Summary: He\/She looked beyond my faults and saw my needs. – Dottie Rambo. Write a story of 600 words or less using this line from a song.<\/p>\n

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