{"id":5790,"date":"2004-12-08T23:52:12","date_gmt":"2004-12-09T04:52:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=5790"},"modified":"2025-02-27T12:09:17","modified_gmt":"2025-02-27T17:09:17","slug":"to-sit-in-darkness","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=5790","title":{"rendered":"To Sit in Darkness (by Rona)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Summary:\u00a0 <\/strong>Joe and Hoss embark on a journey of discovery together.<\/p>\n

Rated:\u00a0 T \u00a0 (10,390 words)<\/p>\n

Disclaimer:\u00a0All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

To Sit in Darkness<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cSee it?\u201d Hoss Cartwright asked his younger brother. Joe was on his feet, scouting around some bushes, looking for a lost calf that they could hear bawling.<\/p>\n

\u201cI see it,\u201d Joe replied, glumly. He retraced his steps and tethered his horse to a tree. \u201cThere\u2019s a hollow over there. The land falls off pretty steeply. I dunno how it got to the bottom in one piece, but it doesn\u2019t appear to be hurt.\u201d<\/p>\n

Grunting, Hoss stepped down from his black horse and tethered it loosely beside Joe\u2019s pinto. Both animals immediately dropped their heads and began to graze. Hoss took the rope off his saddle and Joe did the same. Together, they walked over to the edge of the hollow, which was hidden by bushes.<\/p>\n

\u201cDadburnit, they had ta be prickly bushes, didn\u2019 they?\u201d Hoss grumbled.<\/p>\n

\u201cDunno what you\u2019re complaining about,\u201d Joe grumbled back. \u201cI\u2019ve already been through them once!\u201d He removed a particularly persistent prickle from his backside and ignored Hoss\u2019 sniggers.<\/p>\n

The hollow was sun-warmed and pretty, but not the ideal place for a calf. \u201cI\u2019ll got down an\u2019 git it,\u201d Hoss offered.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t think so!\u201d Joe retorted, crossing his arms over his chest and giving Hoss a hard look.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy not?\u201d Hoss asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe calf\u2019s gonna have to be pulled up that slope, with someone pushing from behind.\u201d Joe eyed Hoss significantly. \u201cIf you think I\u2019m gonna pull you and that calf up there, you\u2019ve got another think coming, big brother!\u201d He tapped Hoss on the chest. \u201cIn case it\u2019s escaped your notice, you\u2019re the biggest Cartwright and I\u2019m the smallest! If anyone is gonna pull someone up there, it isn\u2019t going to be me!\u201d<\/p>\n

Laughing, Hoss handed Joe the rope he was carrying. Joe took it, dropping his own one as he shook the rope loose and began to tie it around his waist. He was just beginning to knot it when he noticed something.\u00a0 \u201cHoss, this rope,\u201d he began.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat?\u201d Hoss asked, coming over to look.<\/p>\n

Unsure what it was, Joe held the rope out. It had felt funny in his hands, but it wasn\u2019t until he saw it that Joe realised that the rope had obviously been wet at some point when it was coiled up and it had started to rot. The strands were soggy and separating.<\/p>\n

\u201cDadburnit,\u201d Hoss cursed. \u201cLay it down here, Joe an\u2019 use yer own rope.\u201d Joe did just that, checking the length of his own rope to make sure there were no problems. Satisfied, he handed the end to Hoss and began to lower himself over the edge.<\/p>\n

It didn\u2019t take long to catch the calf and entwine it in the rope. Joe took careful hold of both the young beast and the rope and then waved to Hoss. \u201cBring us up,\u201d he called.<\/p>\n

Feeling itself suddenly hoisted into mid-air, the calf began to panic, thrashing its legs about violently. Joe whispered soothing words to it, but he was less than successful in his endeavours to calm it. They were about half way to the top when the calf\u2019s foot struck Joe\u2019s shin.<\/p>\n

The pain was blinding and Joe could feel blood start to flow from the place the cloven hoof had struck. He let out a loud gasp of pain, breathing shallowly through his mouth in an effort to keep control. He had no breath for any further soothing noises, and the calf continued to struggle. It was only pure luck that kept it from striking Joe again.<\/p>\n

They gained the top at last and Joe sprawled on the grass for a moment before sitting up. He didn\u2019t dare look at his leg. Even thinking about it caused the wound to start throbbing double time. Joe just wanted to get home and let someone else put a bandage on it. He rose unsteadily to his feet as Hoss let the calf go, having released it from the rope harness.<\/p>\n

\u201cC\u2019mon, little brother, better git this baby back ta its mama.\u201d Hoss dropped the rope to the ground and looked at Joe. Immediately, he saw that all was not well with his younger brother and his eyes raked the slender form in front of him until he saw the blood staining Joe\u2019s pants leg. \u201cJoe, yer leg!\u201d He took a step closer. \u201cLet me look.\u201d<\/p>\n

By that time, Joe had regained his feet and taken a hopping step away from the edge of the hollow. He cringed when Hoss moved towards him. The leg was too sore for him to want anyone to look at it. \u201cNo, don\u2019t,\u201d he pleaded. \u201cJust leave it, Hoss.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, yer bleedin\u2019,\u201d Hoss coaxed. \u201cI gotta look at it, little brother. I cain\u2019t let ya ride home till I see what\u2019s what.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe took another half step back. \u201cNo, please,\u201d he repeated. He moved back again and vanished from Hoss\u2019 sight with a terrified scream.<\/p>\n

********************************<\/p>\n

For a shocked instant, Hoss didn\u2019t believe what he had just seen. He took two strides forward and saw what they had not noticed before \u2013 a natural well of rock, hidden by the long grass. \u201cJoe!\u201d Hoss knelt at the edge of the well and peered down. \u201cJoe?\u201d<\/p>\n

There was no answer. Hoss couldn\u2019t see more than a few feet; the light didn\u2019t seem to penetrate. Indecision held Hoss captive for a moment, then he shook off his hesitation, grabbed the nearest rope and secured it around a tree. The other end he tied around his waist.<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe?\u201d Hoss hoped against hope that his brother would answer him, but there was silence. \u201cI\u2019m comin\u2019 down, Joe,\u201d he called, just in case Joe was conscious, but not yet able to speak. There was still no response. Taking a deep breath, Hoss began to lower himself into the well.<\/p>\n

He had gone down several feet when he felt a vibration in the rope. Halting his descent, puffing to get his breath back, Hoss peered down. The rock was opening up, providing a larger space at the bottom than he had expected. But it was still dark. \u201cJoe?\u201d Hoss called. His voice bounced back at him, telling him he was closer to the bottom than he thought. Reassured, he started moving again.<\/p>\n

The strands of the rotten rope that Hoss had picked up unknowingly in his anxious desire to rescue his brother parted company from each other and Hoss tumbled down the last few feet into the well. The rope landed on his unmoving form as the final insult.<\/p>\n

*******************************<\/p>\n

Hidden in the brush above the hollow, Red Deer, a young Indian brave of nineteen winters, saw it all. The slight youth knew who the Cartwrights were. He also knew that he could not rescue them alone. Frantically, he thought. All the older braves were out hunting; the only braves in the village were old men. Besides, the Ponderosa ranch house was closer. Making his decision, Red Deer swiftly mounted his pinto pony and headed towards the ranch house. He was afraid, for he didn\u2019t know what kind of reception he would receive there, but he knew that his tribe owed much to the Cartwrights. He had to get help for them.<\/p>\n

***********************************<\/p>\n

As awareness returned to him, Joe realised that he was cold. He couldn\u2019t quite figure that out and his eyes cracked open to be met with almost complete darkness. Joe blinked, terrified that he had been struck blind and his vision cleared enough to show him a tiny patch of blue sky, several feet above him. Memory came back with a rush and Joe suddenly felt pain from his body. He groaned.<\/p>\n

It came as quite a shock to hear an answering groan from beside him. Joe flinched from the sound and winced as his body protested the movement.\u00a0It didn\u2019t make sense<\/em>, he thought.\u00a0Why was someone else groaning beside him?\u00a0<\/em>Or was it an echo?<\/p>\n

Trying to sit up, Joe was hit by a wave of pain that started in his head and rushed its way down to his feet. He groaned again and fought the nausea that the pain had triggered. After a time, he conquered it and decided that caution was the order of the day. He reached slowly out with his right arm, relieved that it would move without too much pain. Something twinged in the area of his ribs, but it didn\u2019t feel like a breakage \u2013 more like strained or pulled muscles. Joe kept stretching, patting the ground tentatively.<\/p>\n

And then he felt him and was in no doubt as to who was in the hole with him. There could be no one else \u2013 Hoss!<\/p>\n

************************************<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss?\u201d Joe forced the word out between his dry lips and heard again the groan from the man beside him. Then there was a sudden gulp of air and Hoss began to draw in deep breaths, exhaling sharply in between and Joe felt a huge rush of relief. Hoss had been winded; perhaps he wasn\u2019t too badly injured.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m right here, Shortshanks,\u201d Hoss puffed. His breath had finally come back and he no longer felt as though he was smothering. \u201cYa hurt?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not sure,\u201d Joe admitted. He didn\u2019t want to admit that he had only just come round.<\/p>\n

\u201cLemme see,\u201d Hoss suggested, rolled over and got up.<\/p>\n

Although it was not totally dark in the hole, the light level was extremely low. It was almost impossible for Hoss to see if Joe was bleeding and the only way he could check for injuries was with his hands.\u00a0 \u201cSorry, Shortshanks, I reckon this might hurt,\u201d he apologised.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s all right,\u201d Joe replied. He tried to lie still as Hoss gently probed his body, but it was difficult. His body seemed to be one gigantic bruise. Several groans escaped him as Hoss checked him over. By the time Hoss sat back on his heels, Joe could feel sweat beading his forehead.<\/p>\n

\u201cI guess ya c\u2019n feel yer legs,\u201d Hoss ventured at last. Joe had thought he was never going to speak.<\/p>\n

\u201cI guess so,\u201d he agreed, his voice hoarse and his tone breathless. Joe knew that his left leg was broken somewhere below the knee. Hoss had hauled his boot off and Joe had almost lost control at that point. \u00a0His right shin still throbbed painfully from the cut on it. \u201cWhat else?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cReckon yer left shoulder is separated,\u201d Hoss mumbled. \u201cOr yer upper arm\u2019s broke.\u201d He sounded deeply miserable. \u201cMebbe both.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s not your fault, Hoss,\u201d Joe replied. He hated to hear Hoss sounding so defeated.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes it is,\u201d Hoss replied. He sat down heavily beside Joe. A cloud passed over the sun, plunging their small prison into total darkness. Hoss gulped.\u00a0 \u201cWe ain\u2019t got any way ta git out a here.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDidn\u2019t you come down on a rope?\u201d Joe asked, puzzled. He was sure he\u2019d felt rope lying on Hoss\u2019 legs\u2026 Joe wondered if the bang on the head he had had was worse than he thought. \u201cDidn\u2019t you?\u201d There was silence for a moment. \u201cHoss?\u201d Joe was more than just puzzled now, he was worried.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen I saw ya fall,\u201d Hoss started, his voice low, \u201cI grabbed up the nearest rope, tied it around a tree an\u2019\u2026 an\u2019\u2026\u201d He trailed off into miserable silence.<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd what?\u201d Joe asked. He could hardly think for the pounding in his head. Feeling a sudden surge of panic, Joe reached out with his good hand and clutched Hoss\u2019 sleeve. \u201cHoss?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI chose the wrong rope, Joe,\u201d Hoss whispered. His voice was almost lost in the hushed confines of the hole they were in. \u201cI picked the one what was rotten.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRotten,\u201d Joe echoed and remembered the feel of the soggy rope in his hands. The pain suddenly intensified and his heart plummeted to his boots. \u201cThen we\u2019re \u2026 trapped,\u201d he concluded and the bleakness in his voice caught at Hoss\u2019 heart.<\/p>\n

\u201cSomeone\u2019ll find us, Joe,\u201d he soothed desperately. He glanced up at the light and air above them and noticed that the sun had moved on. It would be dark soon. There was no hope of rescue that night. \u201cPa\u2019ll look fer us when we don\u2019 come home tonight.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHow are they going to know where to look?\u201d Joe asked. He shifted uncomfortably and caught his breath at the pain. When the pain finally subsided to more manageable levels, Joe felt worn out. He closed his eyes. \u201cCan I get a drink?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n

There was another long silence. Joe dragged his eyes open, and focused on Hoss. It was getting even darker in the hole and it was difficult to see. But Joe couldn\u2019t think of any time he had seen Hoss so miserable looking. His heart went out to his older brother, even though he had no idea what was wrong. \u201cHoss?\u201d he ventured. \u201cWhat aren\u2019t you telling me? Are you hurt?\u201d The thought was enough to cause the panic to flare up again, but Joe ruthlessly controlled his thoughts.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere ain\u2019t no water, Joe,\u201d Hoss admitted. \u201cI didn\u2019 bring none with me.\u201d<\/p>\n

This time there was no controlling his thoughts. No water! Joe\u2019s mind spun away from the idea, flitting frantically in every direction, seeking a way out of their dilemma. He struggled to sit up, forgetting his injuries as his body\u2019s \u2018flight or fight\u2019 reflex took over. Joe put down his left hand to help him sit up and the pain erupted through his arm and shoulder.<\/p>\n

The last thing he remembered was Hoss\u2019 gentle hands catching him as he spiralled into darkness.<\/p>\n

******************************<\/p>\n

Pulling his sweating pinto to a stop, Red Deer looked at the ranch house nervously. He still wasn\u2019t sure that he had chosen the right path, but he didn\u2019t feel he could back out now. His unease communicated itself to his horse, which sidled about. Red Deer smoothed a hand down the silky neck in front of him. The decision had been made \u2013 now he had to show his courage and carry it through to its conclusion. He urged the horse on.<\/p>\n

There was no one in the yard when Red Deer rode in and he dismounted slowly, wondering what was best to do. He had never been that close to a white man\u2019s dwelling and wasn\u2019t sure how to go about attracting the attention he needed.<\/p>\n

A sound from behind him made Red Deer whirl. A white man \u2013 not one of the Cartwrights \u2013 was coming from the structure opposite the house. Inside the open door, Red Deer could see a horse and so he assumed this structure was a barn. He had long been interested in the different way that white men lived, but apart from being taught the white man\u2019s language, he had had little to do with his white neighbours.<\/p>\n

Summoning his courage \u2013 it would never do for a brave to appear afraid \u2013 Red Deer stepped forward.<\/p>\n

Instantly, the white man drew his gun, his eyes wide with surprise. \u201cStay there, red!\u201d he ordered. \u201cDon\u2019t try yer Injun tricks on me!\u201d<\/p>\n

Not having the least idea what the man was talking about, Red Deer decided that his best bet was just to tell this man why he had come. \u201cI need to see Ben Cartwright,\u201d he told the other. \u201cHis sons need help.\u201d<\/p>\n

The hand, Jeff King, had never had first hand dealings with the Indians before. He knew all the horror stories, though and had accepted as gospel truth every single nugget of exaggeration he had been fed. With that as his sole frame of reference, King assumed that this Injun meant that Joe and Hoss had been taken captive for whatever nasty reason the Indians could conjure up. With two and two making five, King leapt at the innocent Red Deer and knocked the youth to the ground.<\/p>\n

Wiry and strong, Red Deer fought back as best he could, but he had been taken by surprise and King\u2019s greater weight told against him. Blow after blow got through Red Deer\u2019s defences until the youth slumped to the ground, unconscious.<\/p>\n

*********************************<\/p>\n

There was no way out. Hoss had explored thoroughly the small space in which they now dwelt and there was nothing. No hand holds, no cracks, no fissures leading to another cave. Just the hole in the ground into which they had both fallen. No other prospect but to wait for rescue that might not come in time, if it came at all. It was a dismal reality that weighed heavily on them both.<\/p>\n

The lack of water was probably hardest on Joe. He was badly injured and although Hoss had done everything he could to ease his younger brother\u2019s pain, there wasn\u2019t much he could do. He used the rope to immobilise Joe\u2019s injured arm, but there was little he could do for the broken leg. The bones didn\u2019t appear to be very displaced and Joe\u2019s foot was warm to the touch, despite the cool air. Joe dozed intermittently. His injuries were painful and whenever he moved, he was jerked back to reality. He was exhausted by the pain and wanted nothing more than to sink into a deep slumber.<\/p>\n

By the time darkness fell, both men were feeling utterly depressed. Hoss wanted to talk to Joe, to reassure him that they would be all right, but he couldn\u2019t find the words because he wasn\u2019t sure he believed them. Hoss was seldom less than truthful. Joe couldn\u2019t summon the energy required to talk. His unusual silence was often the key the family used to tell when Joe was not feeling well.<\/p>\n

For a long time, there was just enough light for them to discern the other\u2019s face, but gradually, that small glow faded until the only point of reference was the patch of sky high above them. Stars were glimmering gently, but cast no light down as far as the Cartwrights. The darkness was tangible, a living, breathing entity.<\/p>\n

There was a growing chill in the air, creeping damply from the earthen floor. Joe shivered convulsively and winced as he did so. At once, Hoss\u2019 warm hand came to rest on his chest. \u201cAre ya all right?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m cold,\u201d Joe admitted. He was too tired and too dispirited to lie and say he was \u2018fine\u2019. He shivered again. \u201cMy muscles are cramping,\u201d he added, for he was getting good and tired of lying so flat on the ground.<\/p>\n

\u201cI c\u2019n help ya sit up an\u2019 ya c\u2019n lean against me,\u201d Hoss offered.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell\u2026\u201d Joe didn\u2019t want to admit how tempted he was by that offer. But there was something else he had to take care of before he could get comfortable. And he couldn\u2019t handle it by himself. \u201cHoss, I gotta go.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cGo?\u201d Hoss sounded puzzled. \u201cGo where, Shortshanks?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou know.\u201d Joe made a frustrated gesture that Hoss couldn\u2019t see. \u201cGo<\/em>.\u201d He tried to imbue that single word with a world of meaning. Evidently he succeeded, for Hoss coughed abruptly and mumbled something that Joe didn\u2019t catch. \u201cWhat?\u201d Joe asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cIts gonna hurt,\u201d Hoss warned.<\/p>\n

\u201cI know,\u201d Joe replied, almost feeling amused. \u201cBut I don\u2019t want to lie in a puddle, thanks all the same.\u201d Hoss snorted, which Joe took to mean that his brother could understand his attitude and felt the same way.<\/p>\n

All the same, Joe was not prepared for it to hurt as much as it did and he found it utterly humiliating to have to be supported while he tried to pee. Quite why he should find it easier with his eyes shut, when they were in almost complete darkness was something Joe didn\u2019t think about too hard \u2013 if it worked, that was fine by him. Hoss helped Joe back to where they had been sitting and took his turn. Returning, he carefully sat Joe up and eased behind him, leaning his back against the rock.<\/p>\n

It was a relief to Joe to have a change of position and he revelled in his big brother\u2019s warmth. In fact, he became so relaxed that he started to drift off to sleep when something that had been niggling at the back of his mind suddenly brought him back to awareness.<\/p>\n

Hoss was shivering.<\/p>\n

Leaning against Hoss, Joe couldn\u2019t figure it out. Hoss was much warmer to the touch than Joe had been, although he was feeling much more comfortable by then. Hoss was always warm to the touch; it was a standing joke in the family that Hoss was always warm because he kept stoking his internal fires. So why was Hoss shivering? Unless the cold was creeping up through his butt and his legs, which was always a possibility. Joe\u2019s legs, which rested on the bare earth, were cooler than his body, which rested against Hoss.<\/p>\n

But somehow, Joe didn\u2019t think that that was the reason for the shivering. \u201cAre you comfortable, Hoss?\u201d he asked, wondering if he was somehow pressing against a nerve or a sore spot that Hoss hadn\u2019t mentioned.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m fine,\u201d Hoss replied and something in his voice gave Joe an added clue and he wondered how on earth he could have been so stupid and insensitive.<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, you don\u2019t need to be afraid,\u201d he said, gently. \u201cI\u2019m right here with you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWho says I\u2019m afraid?\u201d Hoss snapped. \u201cWhat are ya sayin\u2019? That I\u2019m a coward?\u201d<\/p>\n

The exasperation that Joe felt was just fleeting. He knew how hard it was for pride to allow a man to admit to a fear that others might laugh at. How long had it taken him to admit that he had a fear of heights? He worked to overcome it every time he faced a situation like the one they had faced that day. Had Hoss realised how nervous Joe had been about going down into that hollow?<\/p>\n

\u201cI know you\u2019re not a coward,\u201d Joe replied. His voice was even, not showing hurt or anger or anything but love and understanding. \u201cBut I know you\u2019ve never been completely happy in the dark. Hoss, you don\u2019t have to hide with me.\u201d He longed to say that he didn\u2019t care if Hoss was afraid, but right then, he wasn\u2019t sure it was entirely true. He was helpless and totally reliant on Hoss to help him when he needed it and if Hoss was incapacitated by his fear, then Joe was in an extremely vulnerable and unenviable situation. And he didn\u2019t know how to communicate that to his brother without making Hoss more self-conscious or \u2013 worse \u2013 angry.<\/p>\n

\u201cI ain\u2019t afraid o\u2019 the dark,\u201d Hoss denied, stoutly. He looked around him at the blackness that was all he could see, whether his eyes were open or shut. His heart was beating much faster than usual, but he was sure he had hidden his fear. How had Joe come to realise that he was not totally in control? Another shudder shook his broad frame and Hoss suddenly knew how Joe knew. He blushed, embarrassed that he had been lying, not only to his brother, but to himself.<\/p>\n

Leaning against Hoss, cocooned in his brother\u2019s love and caring, Joe wondered how on earth he was going to persuade Hoss that his own concern came only from his love and caring. Joe was well used to being the cherished, protected youngest, but he was more than capable of taking care of others. Family love and loyalty went deep in all the Cartwrights, with each of them looking out for the others. For the first time, Joe didn\u2019t know how to express it. His emotions were so open, that this was possibly the first time that this situation had ever occurred. \u201cHoss\u2026\u201d he began.<\/p>\n

\u201cYer right,\u201d Hoss confessed. \u201cI dunno why, but I\u2019m afraid.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIts all right to be afraid,\u201d Joe crooned. \u201cI\u2019m right here to help you.\u201d He leaned his cheek against his brother\u2019s chest. \u201cI just don\u2019t understand why you\u2019re afraid.\u201d He felt Hoss tense and instantly regretted his candour. \u201cI\u2019m not saying you don\u2019t have reason,\u201d he rushed on, the words almost tripping over each other. \u201cI just don\u2019t know why.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI ain\u2019t sure I know, either,\u201d Hoss responded. He began to think about how best to answer his brother.<\/p>\n

*****************************<\/p>\n

\u201cKing, slow down!\u201d Roy Coffee barked, looking at the panting man in front of him. \u201cWhat\u2019s this Injun done?\u201d The red skinned youth was badly beaten and barely conscious. \u201cBetter git the doc fer him, Clem,\u201d he ordered his deputy.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s hurt Joe an\u2019 Hoss!\u201d King babbled, finally getting his breathing and his excitement under control. \u201cThey might be dead!\u201d he added dramatically, quite forgetting that Roy and Clem were personal friends of the Cartwrights.<\/p>\n

Frowning, Clem hesitated, exchanging a worried glance with Roy. \u201cDid Mr Cartwright send you into town with him?\u201d Clem asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo,\u201d King admitted. \u201cHe\u2019s in town at the Cattleman\u2019s Association meetin\u2019.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBetter git Ben, too,\u201d Roy suggested and Clem hurried out. Roy helped King to assist the Indian youth to the couch on the other side of the office. Red Deer groaned as he lay down. Roy was concerned, not just because the young man was so obviously hurt, but because he knew that Ben had a good relationship with the local tribes and this incident, whatever it was about, could harm that relationship irreparably. Ben was often very useful in defusing tense situations locally and a cooling of that friendship could be detrimental to the whole town.<\/p>\n

The first person who came into the jail was Paul Martin, the town doctor. He and Roy were old friends and he didn\u2019t waste time asking questions. He simply knelt down by the couch and started to examine his patient. King, trapped under Roy\u2019s forbidding gaze, squirmed uneasily. The dark look the doctor sent in his direction did nothing to calm his growing certainty that he had somehow made the biggest mistake of his life.<\/p>\n

The door opened again a few minutes later to admit a Ben Cartwright who looked deeply worried, as well he might. He hurried across to peer over Paul\u2019s shoulder at the injured youth. \u201cThat\u2019s Red Deer!\u201d he exclaimed. \u201cWinnemucca\u2019s great-nephew.\u201d He raised his head and glared at King. \u201cWhat have you done to him?\u201d<\/p>\n

Once again, the unfortunate ranch hand began to stutter about Hoss and Joe being hurt. Ben, although his heart was quaking, stopped him. \u201cTake a deep breath,\u201d he advised King. \u201cTell me exactly what Red Deer said!\u201d<\/p>\n

Doing exactly as he was told, King took a deep breath and fought to remember what had been said. \u201cHe asked for you,\u201d he reported. \u201cHis English is real good, too, now I think on it.\u201d Seeing Ben\u2019s frown, he hurried on. \u201cSaid your sons needed help.\u201d<\/p>\n

There was a mutual exchange of looks between the four other men. \u201cSo Red Deer didn\u2019t say anything about Hoss and Joe being hurt?\u201d Ben asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, but what else could he mean?\u201d King protested. \u201cHe\u2019s an Injun!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI live at peace with the Piautes,\u201d Ben hissed. \u201cBut I might not after this, depending on how badly hurt Red Deer is!\u201d He leaned over Paul. \u201cHow is he?\u201d he asked. It hadn\u2019t escaped Ben\u2019s notice that the only person in the room who actually knew anything about his sons was the injured youth on the couch.<\/p>\n

\u201cMostly bruises, as far as I can see,\u201d Paul replied. \u201cHe has had a bit of a knock on the head and he\u2019s drifting a bit. But he should be all right with some rest.\u201d He gestured to Clem. \u201cGet me some water please.\u201d Reaching into his bag, Paul brought out the small bottle of smelling salts and waved it under Red Deer\u2019s nose.<\/p>\n

The pungent smell roused the youth at once and he sneeze violently. Paul held the glass of water to his lips and Red Deer drank several mouthfuls before it was removed. By then, his eyes were open and he was gazing in bleary confusion at the white men.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m Ben Cartwright, Red Deer,\u201d Ben introduced himself. \u201cI am sorry for what happened to you when you came to the ranch.\u201d<\/p>\n

Blinking, Red Deer looked around the room without moving his head. \u201cThis is not the ranch,\u201d he replied, his voice soft.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo.\u201d Ben thought fast, trying to limit the damage the ranch hand had done. \u201cMy man realised that he had made a mistake and brought you here to town to find a doctor for you and to get me. Since he didn\u2019t know where I was to be found, he brought you here to the jail, since the sheriff knew where I was.\u201d Ben detested lying, but Red Deer\u2019s acceptance of the story \u2013 and later Winnemucca\u2019s acceptance of it \u2013 would decide whether the white man would once again be at loggerheads with the red man. It was a situation that Ben did not want to see ever again.<\/p>\n

For a horrible moment, they thought that Red Deer was not going to accept Ben\u2019s story, but in the end he nodded shortly. \u201cMy head hurts,\u201d he announced and indeed, he did look pale.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou took quite a bump, young man,\u201d Paul told him. \u201cBut you\u2019ll be fine after a good night\u2019s sleep.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy did you want to see me?\u201d Ben asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cI wanted to see you?\u201d Red Deer echoed. He glanced away, clearly thinking around and about the notion. At last he looked up and met Ben\u2019s eyes again. \u201cI do not remember,\u201d he admitted.<\/p>\n

*************************************<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019 ever remember not bein\u2019 afraid o\u2019 the dark,\u201d Hoss admitted quietly. \u201cIt seems I allus was.\u201d He unconsciously clutched Joe tighter to his chest. The younger man fought back a wince of pain. \u201cIt were better when we were still travellin\u2019, though I don\u2019 remember much \u2018bout that. But Adam were allus there, an\u2019 I could hold his hand if\u2019n I were scared.\u201d Remembered warmth and security coloured Hoss\u2019 voice. \u201cThe plains was never quiet, Joe; there was allus somethin\u2019 out there makin\u2019 a noise, whether it be wolves an\u2019 coyotes, or even jist the wind.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou were pretty small when you were travelling in the wagon,\u201d Joe commented quietly. \u201cIts amazing that you remember anything.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019 remember the travellin\u2019 itself,\u201d Hoss admitted. \u201cJist them nights in the wagon; the nights Pa weren\u2019t with us. I was real scared then. I didn\u2019 know if\u2019n he would ever come back, or if\u2019n somethin\u2019 bad would happen while he was on watch.\u201d Hoss moved slightly. The temperature was dropping rapidly and the earth they were sitting on now felt damp. \u201cMa mama died out there on the plains. I allus knew that, Joe. Bad things could happen out there. Mama was shot by an Injun arrow an\u2019 died. It could a happened ta Pa jist the same.\u201d Sorrow flooded Joe\u2019s heart. \u201cBut I kinda remember when we got ta the Ponderosa. Pa worked real hard cuttin\u2019 down them trees ta build us a real house. I wanted a candle left burnin\u2019 in the wagon at night, but Pa said it were too dangerous. The wagon cover could easily catch fire. Pa said there was nuthin\u2019 ta be scared of, but I was still scared. If\u2019n there was nuthin\u2019 ta be scared of, how come Pa stayed awake as long as he could, holdin\u2019 his rifle? What was out there that would hurt us?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDo you know?\u201d Joe asked, his voice low. This was a part of his brothers\u2019 heritage that he knew very little about. Adam had rarely spoken to Joe of Inger and the time after her death.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe was afraid o\u2019 the Injuns,\u201d Hoss replied. \u201cThat was afore they knew Pa an\u2019 learned that he weren\u2019t gonna hurt \u2018em. And there were nuthin\u2019 atween us an\u2019 them but the canvas walls o\u2019 the wagon.\u201d Hoss shuddered. \u201cI dunno how Pa done it, Joe. Worked all day an\u2019 stayed awake half the night. I just dunno.\u201d<\/p>\n

Reminded once more of what a remarkable man their father was, Joe said nothing. He was much warmer, leaning against Hoss, but the pain hadn\u2019t eased any. He hoped Hoss would keep talking and help keep his mind off his woes, but he certainly wasn\u2019t going to push Hoss into any confidences his brother wasn\u2019t ready to make.<\/p>\n

\u201cOnce the cabin was built, it were better,\u201d Hoss went on. \u201cAdam an\u2019 me had a tiny room we shared, with thick shutters over the window. I was allowed a candle then. I\u2019m sure Pa came in an\u2019 blew it out every night once we was asleep, but I never thought about that then. I wondered how come the candle didn\u2019 burn down that quick, but I was a kid an\u2019 I never really give it much thought. An\u2019 when the big house were built, I found it real strange ta be on ma own in a room. I were \u2013 I dunno, four or five? \u2013 but I really needed that candle fer company then! I couldn\u2019 tell Pa why a big boy like me were afraid o\u2019 sleepin\u2019 alone an\u2019 Adam were more\u2019n old enough ta want his own room.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt were when yer Mama come that I stopped needin\u2019 a candle,\u201d Hoss confessed. \u201cNot right off, but gradual like. She never made fun o\u2019 me, Joe, jist told me I were a big, strong boy an\u2019 she were right proud o\u2019 me. An\u2019 I wanted ta make her proud, \u2018specially cos Adam weren\u2019t bein\u2019 so nice ta her right then. So, I made maself sleep without a candle and when Mama praised me fer bein\u2019 such a brave boy, I felt about ten feet tall.\u201d The remembered pride was in Hoss\u2019 voice. Joe ached to hear that. He couldn\u2019t remember his mother ever telling him that and he suddenly missed her sorely. He blinked away tears.<\/p>\n

\u201cI got ta the stage where I didn\u2019 mind sleepin\u2019 without a candle at night,\u201d Hoss continued. \u201cIt weren\u2019t often that dark. The moon would be out, or the stars, or there\u2019d be a bit o\u2019 light somewheres. But I ain\u2019t never liked mines an\u2019 holes and places where there ain\u2019t no light at all.\u201d The fear was creeping back into Hoss\u2019 voice.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s nothing in here to harm you,\u201d Joe murmured. He shivered and then winced. He longed to fall asleep, but he was sure he wouldn\u2019t be able to, such was the pain. Nor did he want to leave Hoss \u2018alone\u2019 in the dark.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut there is,\u201d Hoss replied.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat?\u201d Joe sat up a little straighter and twisted his head to peer up to where he knew Hoss\u2019 face was. It was too dark for him to see anything and Joe was suddenly terrified. What was Hoss talking about? What was in that hole with them that might kill them?<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s nuthin\u2019.\u201d That cryptic comment just alarmed Joe further and he struggled to free himself from Hoss\u2019 grasp. Hoss, feeling Joe struggling and not understanding why, tightened his grip. \u201cEasy, Joe.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat are you talking about, Hoss?\u201d Joe cried. \u201cLet go of me!\u201d He twisted to break free and pain shot through his injured shoulder and he collapsed with a cry of pain.<\/p>\n

\u201cHush, Joe, easy. It\u2019s all right, little brother. I didn\u2019 mean ta frighten ya. Take it easy.\u201d Hoss smoothed his hand gently over Joe\u2019s hair.<\/p>\n

It took Joe some time to get the pain under a modicum of control. He came back to himself to find that he was slumped on the ground, lying with his head on his brother\u2019s lap. \u201cHoss?\u201d Joe\u2019s voice was thin and frail, telling his older brother more about the battle he had just fought against the pain than mere words could have done.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry,\u201d Hoss apologised miserably. \u201cI didn\u2019 mean ta frighten ya, Joe. I jist meant \u2013 well\u2026\u201d He paused and gathered his thoughts, his hand resting gently against Joe\u2019s shoulder. \u201cThere\u2019s nuthin\u2019 down here, Joe, \u2018ceptin\u2019 us. An\u2019 that could harm us \u2013 probably is already, truth be known.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI still don\u2019t understand,\u201d Joe murmured. He felt utterly wiped out, exhausted beyond measure. He was also growing cold again quickly. He shivered.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe ain\u2019t got no water,\u201d Hoss reminded Joe. \u201cAn\u2019 we ain\u2019t got nuthin\u2019 ta make a fire with. We ain\u2019t got no food.\u201d He swallowed hard. \u201cWhat chance do we stand, Joe? Ain\u2019t no way ta git out a here.\u201d And the big man put his head into his hands and wept.<\/p>\n

******************************<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat are we going to do?\u201d Ben asked Paul Martin in a whisper. Red Deer was sleeping on the couch, his headache eased by white man\u2019s medicine. \u201cIsn\u2019t there anything you can give him that will restore his memory?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI wish there was!\u201d Paul replied, his frustration clear in his tone. \u201cI\u2019m sorry, Ben, but there\u2019s nothing in medical science that will repair memory.\u201d<\/p>\n

Biting his lip in frustration, Ben glanced out of the window. It was dark and the stars were shining brightly. Ben knew that the spring nights were still bitterly cold and that a sharp frost had fallen over the land. If his sons were in trouble, and somehow, Ben was sure they were, then the weather was conspiring against them.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat were Hoss an\u2019 Joe doin\u2019 today?\u201d Roy asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cChecking on the herd in the north pasture,\u201d Ben replied, distractedly. \u201cThey might have been there half an hour \u2013 they might have been there for several hours. It would depend on what they found.\u201d He started to pace. \u201cI suppose that\u2019s the place we ought to start looking in the morning, but it\u2019s a big area.\u201d<\/p>\n

Behind his back, Paul, Roy and Clem exchanged glances. Roy wasn\u2019t the only one to wish Adam was there, but the oldest Cartwright boy had departed for points east just before winter and there was no sign of his imminent return. Adam wouldn\u2019t be able to do anything more practical than any of the rest of them, but he would be another member of the family for Ben to lean on.<\/p>\n

\u201cIts possible that after a sleep, Red Deer might remember what it was he wanted to tell you,\u201d Paul volunteered. He glanced at the clock, for he would have to waken the young brave after a couple of hours because of the risk of concussion. The hapless hand, Jeff King, had been sent home and Roy was pretty certain that he would be gone before Ben arrived back at the ranch, whenever that was!<\/p>\n

\u201cBut you can\u2019t guarantee that,\u201d Ben retorted. He shook his head. \u201cWhat can have happened?\u201d he whispered.<\/p>\n

*******************************<\/p>\n

The night grew colder and darker. Both the Cartwright brothers were feeling the effects of the cold now, although Hoss was still warmer due to his greater body weight and the fact he wasn\u2019t injured. The rock walls were damp and the brothers were now lying down in the middle of the space, to try and retain as much heat as they could. But the tremors that were wracking Hoss\u2019 body didn\u2019t have much to do with the cold.<\/p>\n

Joe had dozed for a while, but the penetrating cold and the pain from his injuries had brought him back to wakefulness and he lay against his brother and listened to the uneven tenor of Hoss\u2019 breathing and empathised with him. Joe had been in that place himself, not that long before and the memory was still fresh. He could remember the terror he felt as he lay face down on the rock, half way up the mountain, unable to go either up or down. If Ben hadn\u2019t come\u2026 Joe didn\u2019t know what would have happened.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve never been so scared in all my life,\u201d Joe said, abruptly. \u201cI couldn\u2019t move and I was crying like a baby. All I had to do was climb up a few more feet and take hold of the rifle. I wasn\u2019t that close to the edge that I would fall. Yet I couldn\u2019t move, Hoss. I felt sick and I could barely catch my breath. I tried to shame myself out of feeling like that \u2013 I\u2019m a grown man after all. But it didn\u2019t work.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt ain\u2019t nuthin\u2019 ta be ashamed of,\u201d Hoss comforted him. \u201cAn\u2019 think how ya went down that cliff after Adam that time.\u201d<\/p>\n

The shudder that ran through Joe was not put on at all. He still had nightmares of seeing Adam lying, injured, on that ledge. Several times on his way down to get Adam and on the way back to the top with him, Joe thought that he would freeze again as he had on Eagle\u2019s Nest.<\/p>\n

\u201cI still don\u2019t like heights,\u201d Joe replied. \u201cI\u2019m still afraid when I\u2019m up really high.\u201d<\/p>\n

By now, Hoss was intrigued. \u201cJoe, when we went ta meet Pa an\u2019 the Watsons with the nitro fer the mines, ya seemed ta be all right when we was right up there on the top o\u2019 the mountain.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI was putting on a face,\u201d Joe admitted. \u201cAnd after what happened to Andy, I was more scared of the nitro than the height. And when that stone went under my foot, and I fell\u2026\u201d Joe swallowed dryly after a moment. \u201cMy life flashed before my eyes then, that\u2019s for sure!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot jist yours!\u201d Hoss growled. He had never felt as useless in his life as he had standing at the top of the cliff watching Ellis Watson easing his way down the cliff. Joe had been clinging onto a rock, not in any real danger of falling, but with the box of nitro resting precariously against his legs. How the whole thing hadn\u2019t exploded as it tumbled head over heels down the mountain was anyone\u2019s guess. \u201cI was a-feared\u2026\u201d Hoss didn\u2019t have to finish his sentence.<\/p>\n

\u201cMe, too,\u201d Joe agreed. \u201cBut I came through it because you and Pa were there and we\u2019ll get through this together.\u201d His hand squeezed Hoss\u2019 arm.<\/p>\n

\u201cDifference is, Pa ain\u2019t here,\u201d Hoss grumbled, although he did appreciate Joe\u2019s attempts to make him feel better. He did feel marginally less afraid, simply because he knew that his brother understood his irrational fears and wasn\u2019t making fun of him.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut he will be, come morning,\u201d Joe chided Hoss gently. His absolute faith in his father rang in his voice. \u201cWhen Pa knows we\u2019re missing, he\u2019ll come looking for us. He might not find us right away, but he\u2019ll come, Hoss.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, I know he will.\u201d But although Hoss knew that Ben would look diligently for them, there was no guarantee that he would find them in time. And the lack of water was already starting to tell on them both.<\/p>\n

*************************************<\/p>\n

Opening his eyes at the persistent hand that was shaking his shoulder, Red Deer looked blankly into the face of the white man before he recognised him as the doctor. \u201cWhat is it?\u201d he asked, looking around with wide eyes.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m just making sure that you\u2019re all right,\u201d Paul explained. \u201cIts standard procedure when someone has had a head injury. Can you tell me your name?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI am Red Deer and this is the white man\u2019s jail in Virginia City,\u201d the youth answered, with as much dignity as he could muster, which was a lot under the circumstances.<\/p>\n

\u201cJust checking,\u201d Paul replied. \u201cHow do you feel?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cTired,\u201d Red Deer replied, trying to stifle a yawn.<\/p>\n

\u201cThen sleep,\u201d Paul advised and watched the dark eyes close slowly. Within minutes, the even breathing told him his patient was sound asleep again.<\/p>\n

It was 3 am. Roy was sleeping on a cot in one of the cells. Clem, who had vowed he could stay awake, was slumbering behind the desk. Paul eyed him and decided that he would most likely have a very stiff neck come morning. Ben was outside on the porch, leaning on the hitching rail and looking out to the mountains where his sons most likely were. Not for the first time, Paul sent up a prayer that the boys were all right. If anything happened to them\u2026 It didn\u2019t bear thinking about.<\/p>\n

****************************<\/p>\n

Dawn was still some time away when Ben prepared Buck to ride back to the ranch. He was going to prepare a wagon and go looking for his boys. Paul Martin was hitching his buggy. He was going to wait at the Ponderosa for Ben to bring his sons in. With luck, they would be all right, but just in case they weren\u2019t, it was better for Paul to wait at the ranch than in town. It was nearer for a start. A few minutes before they were ready to leave, Paul went back into the jail and gently woke Red Deer.<\/p>\n

For an instant the young brave looked confused, then the frown cleared from his brow. Paul smiled at him. \u201cIt\u2019s almost dawn, and we\u2019re going back to the Ponderosa. Mr Cartwright is going to go out looking for his sons.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDawn?\u201d Red Deer glanced at the window where he could see a glimpse of colourless sky. Dawn was getting nearer and the darkness was starting to give way to the coming light.\u00a0 \u201cHave I been here all night?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, all night,\u201d Paul confirmed. \u201cHow do you feel?\u201d He could see that the young man\u2019s eyes were brighter and his colour was better.<\/p>\n

\u201cStiff,\u201d Red Deer admitted. \u201cBut better than I did last night.\u201d He pushed away the blanket that had been covering him and sat up. \u201cMr Cartwright will want to go straight to the place where his sons are. I will take him there.\u201d<\/p>\n

Excitement flared through Paul\u2019s gut, but he kept his face schooled to neutrality. \u201cDo you know where they are?\u201d he asked, as though the question was of no importance.<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course!\u201d Red Deer looked at Paul as though he had grown horns. \u201cThat is why I was seeking Mr\u2026\u201d His voice trailed off as he realised that he had indeed got his short-term memory back. His face, which had initially shown his pleasure, grew grave. \u201cWe had better hurry,\u201d he announced soberly. \u201cThey fell into a hole. The rope broke.\u201d<\/p>\n

This was not good news. Paul glanced over at Roy and saw Ben standing just behind him. \u201cLet\u2019s go,\u201d Ben declared.<\/p>\n

**********************************<\/p>\n

The time seemed to drag. Ben began to have the disjointed feeling that although he was sitting on a moving horse, the road was rolling underneath him so that he actually made no forward progress at all, for the sun was steadily rising, but he seemed no nearer to reaching home. He had questioned Red Deer closely and was alarmed by what the youth reported to him.<\/p>\n

But at last they reached the ranch and Ben set about getting a wagon organised. Straw was laid thickly in the back and blankets and water was added, too. Ben himself took the reins and he followed the young brave, admiring the youth\u2019s upright posture on his pinto pony which reminded Ben so painfully of Joe\u2019s horse, Cochise. Several of the ranch hands rode with them, but as Roy had predicted, Jeff King was nowhere to be found. His gear had gone from the bunkhouse and his horse was not in the corral. Ben was indifferent. Thanks to the man\u2019s carelessness, Joe and Hoss had had to spend the night trapped in a hole somewhere, on a bitterly cold spring night. If King had had a bit of sense, then perhaps the boys could have been rescued the day before. No, Ben wasn\u2019t sorry to see the man go.<\/p>\n

Now, it seemed to Ben that time was speeding past, although he didn\u2019t seem to be much closer to finding his sons. The frost was slowly burning off the grass now, but Ben knew how brutally cold it had been the previous night and he was deeply worried.<\/p>\n

A whinny suddenly sounded from the trees ahead. Ben\u2019s heart leapt \u2013 it had to be either Cochise or Chubb. They must be drawing nearer!<\/p>\n

***************************<\/p>\n

Something drew Hoss out of a restless slumber. The Cartwright boys were still lying huddled together on the floor of the hole. Both of them, despite sharing their body heat, were cold to the point where their shivering was slowly stopping. Hoss was still shivering, but Joe had barely moved for the last while \u2013 Hoss had no way to gauge the time \u2013 and the older Cartwright was feeling a vague, far-away worry about his younger brother.<\/p>\n

Opening his eyes, Hoss was more than relieved to see that it was daylight at last. He and Joe had exhausted themselves talking endlessly through the night as they strove to keep Hoss\u2019 demons at bay. Eventually, Joe had fallen asleep and Hoss was glad, for he knew how badly injured his brother was. Yet, if it hadn\u2019t been for Joe, Hoss wasn\u2019t sure he would have got through the night sane.<\/p>\n

Feeling stiff, Hoss reluctantly and carefully slid out from beneath Joe. Joe mumbled and his eyes opened briefly. He looked at Hoss with extreme disinterest before closing his eyes again. It didn\u2019t seem to register with Joe that morning had come. Again, Hoss thought that that ought to worry him, but somehow it didn\u2019t.\u00a0 Hoss moved a step or two and then sat down again. He wondered vaguely what had wakened him. Not that it mattered. They were stuck in that hole and likely to die in it.<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss! Joe!\u201d<\/p>\n

Funny, that sounded like Pa. Hoss yawned and shivered once more. As if Pa would be there. His eyes dipped closed and his chin came to rest upon his chest. Sleep, that was what he needed. Perhaps he would just die in his sleep.<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss!\u201d This time, the voice was accompanied by a touch and Hoss jerked awake and looked into Ben\u2019s face.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa?\u201d Hoss\u2019 voice was low, as though he couldn\u2019t believe his eyes. He blinked hard. \u201cPa?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m here, son,\u201d Ben soothed. \u201cAre you all right?\u201d He glanced over his shoulder at Joe.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m okay,\u201d Hoss replied. \u201cBut Joe\u2019s hurt bad.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, I know,\u201d Ben agreed gravely. \u201cCome on, son, have a drink and then we\u2019ll get you both out of this hole.\u201d Ben handed Hoss the canteen and watched closely as his son drank. He had seen at once that they had no water and he didn\u2019t want Hoss to drink too much too fast and be sick. As it was, Hoss didn\u2019t look good, his face pale and his skin cold to the touch.<\/p>\n

When Hoss had had a drink, Ben urged him to his feet and helped him to where the rope dangled from the ground above. \u201cFred, Dave and the others are waiting for you,\u201d Ben explained. \u201cYou don\u2019t have to do anything, just relax.\u201d He looped the rope harness under Hoss\u2019 arms. \u201cHaul away!\u201d he called and Hoss felt a jerk as he was hoisted into the air.<\/p>\n

****************************<\/p>\n

It took a little longer to get Joe out, for they had to be very careful of his injuries. Once he was on the surface, Ben wrapped Joe in blankets and together he and Fred lifted him into the wagon. Hoss was already snuggled into the hay, a blanket round his shoulders, feeling considerably warmer in the sunshine. Joe was carefully placed beside Hoss and Ben turned to Red Deer.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know how to thank you,\u201d he began. \u201cOr how to apologise for what my ranch hand did to you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt is not your fault,\u201d Red Deer replied. \u201cBen Cartwright has helped the Piautes many times; I was glad to be able to help you. I just wish that I had been able to remember this yesterday.\u201d He hesitated and looked at the wagon. \u201cWill your sons be all right?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThanks to you, I think they will,\u201d Ben replied. He put out his hand and after a long moment, Red Deer copied him and Ben shook the youth\u2019s hand warmly. \u201cTell Winnemucca that I will send cattle to your camp, as a sign of thanks and apology. A gift that is warmly meant, but does not come close to repaying what you did for myself and my sons.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI am sure Winnemucca will understand,\u201d Red Deer replied. He nodded to Ben, then went over to his horse. In one fluid leap \u2013 that reminded Ben of Joe \u2013 he mounted and rode off.<\/p>\n

\u201cLet\u2019s go,\u201d Ben ordered, climbing onto the wagon seat. Fred and the others fell in behind, leading Cochise and Chubb.<\/p>\n

********************************<\/p>\n

Paul Martin was busy for quite some time after Ben arrived home with Joe and Hoss. Hoss was chilled through, hungry and thirsty and emotionally exhausted. His guilt over the predicament that he and his brother had ended up in was all mixed up with him feeling that he had somehow let both himself and Joe down by admitting to his fear of the dark. Hoss was given something to eat and sent to bed where he sank into a deep sleep at once.<\/p>\n

Joe, on the other hand, had to wait rather longer before he had something to eat. Paul had set Joe\u2019s dislocated shoulder, broken humerus, broken ankle and stitched the deep gash on his leg and once that was done, he and Ben sat down and waited patiently for Joe to come round from the anaesthetic.<\/p>\n

Sitting by Joe\u2019s bed, Ben drank in the sight of his youngest son. While Paul had been working on Joe, Ben had sat with the sleeping Hoss, his eyes lingering on the big man\u2019s frame, his hand resting on top of one of Hoss\u2019, giving thanks that his sons had been returned to him safely.<\/p>\n

Now, Ben was going through the same process with Joe. Bad though his son\u2019s injuries were, Ben knew that things could have been worse \u2013 much worse. If Red Deer hadn\u2019t seen Hoss vanishing into that hole, his sons might never have been found. There had been almost no sign of the hole from above. There would only have been the horses, waiting patiently for their riders who might never have returned.<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe\u2019s going to be just fine, Ben,\u201d Paul finally said. \u201cHis shoulder will take some time to right itself, simply because he\u2019s broken his upper arm, too, but the breaks were nice and clean. I don\u2019t think he\u2019ll suffer any lasting effects.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThey were both pretty cold,\u201d Ben replied, not quite asking a question.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, they were,\u201d Paul agreed, steadily. \u201cJoe more so than Hoss, as he has less body fat. But they both warmed up a good bit on the way here and you can feel that Joe is lovely and warm now. I know Hoss was warm when he went to bed \u2013 he\u2019d had something hot to eat and hot to drink. That works wonders.\u201d<\/p>\n

At that moment, Joe groaned and opened his eyes. He glanced around the room before his gaze came to rest on Ben. \u201cI thought perhaps it was a dream,\u201d he whispered. His mouth was still very dry.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo dream,\u201d Ben smiled. He offered Joe a few sips of water. \u201cHow do you feel, young man?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSore, tired,\u201d Joe offered. He frowned. \u201cPa, how did you find us?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI had some help,\u201d Ben explained and told Joe the story of Red Deer.<\/p>\n

\u201cThank God,\u201d Joe said, simply.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, indeed,\u201d Ben agreed. They were silent for a few moments, then Paul rose.<\/p>\n

\u201cI think I can go home now,\u201d he declared. \u201cBen, try and get Joe to eat something. A few days in bed and then he can get up for a while each day. But no walking on that ankle, please!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDoc, wait,\u201d Joe pleaded. \u201cIs Hoss all right?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s absolutely fine,\u201d Paul replied. \u201cHe\u2019s asleep right now and you can see him later, after you\u2019ve eaten and had a sleep.\u201d He bid Ben goodbye and left.<\/p>\n

\u201cIs Hoss all right?\u201d Joe asked, as Ben helped him to eat a little while later.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou heard what the doctor said, Joe,\u201d Ben replied.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t mean like that,\u201d Joe answered, not quite sure how to phrase his concern. He didn\u2019t want to embarrass Hoss, but at the same time, he wanted to know that his brother had come out of that dark hole sane. Joe had stayed awake as long as he could during the previous night, but he knew that at some point, he had lost track of what was going on. \u201cI meant\u2026\u201d Joe frowned and looked at Ben. \u201cIt was really dark in that hole,\u201d he concluded tentatively.<\/p>\n

At once, Ben understood. He had always known that Hoss had been afraid of the dark when he was a child, but he hadn\u2019t realised that Hoss still was afraid. Now, Joe\u2019s simple words told Ben everything and he understood what Joe wanted to know.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe was shaky, but fine,\u201d Ben replied and smiled. \u201cI bet you were a bit shaky, too.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI sure was,\u201d Joe agreed. He yawned, the sudden release of tension making him feel very tired.\u00a0 Ben tucked Joe in, made sure he was warm enough and sat with him until the young man was sound asleep.<\/p>\n

Then, he went through to tend to his other son.<\/p>\n

*********************************<\/p>\n

\u201cI ain\u2019t never bin through nuthin\u2019 like that afore, Pa,\u201d Hoss explained. \u201cIt weren\u2019t too bad ta begin with, cos it were still light. Oh, bad enough that we didn\u2019 have no water an\u2019 no way ta git out a there an\u2019 Joe were hurt. But we wasn\u2019t too bad off, ya know?\u201d He glanced at his father and Ben nodded. \u201cBut then it got dark an\u2019 cold an\u2019 the ground were damp. So I sat against the rock an\u2019 let Joe lean on me. That way, he weren\u2019t so cold. But it got colder an\u2019 colder until the rock were damp, too, an\u2019 we lay down on the ground again. It didn\u2019 seem so bad.\u201d Hoss glanced down. \u201cBut I were afraid, Pa. Afraid o\u2019 the dark.\u201d He sounded utterly miserable.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s not a crime, Hoss,\u201d Ben reminded him gently. \u201cEveryone has their irrational fears. Look at Joe and his fear of heights?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam don\u2019t have no fears,\u201d Hoss muttered resentfully.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes he does,\u201d Ben replied regretfully. \u201cAdam is afraid to love too much in case the person he loves is snatched away from him.\u201d Adam loved his family very deeply, but in a family of touchers, Adam usually kept himself in reserve. Ben suspected that that was why Adam had never really had a successful relationship with a woman \u2013 he instinctively expected to be hurt. The worst thing was, he often had been. \u201cEvery man has something that he fears.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m a big strong man, Pa,\u201d Hoss cried, determined not to take absolution too cheaply.<\/p>\n

\u201cAre you suggesting that Joe shouldn\u2019t be afraid of heights simply because he is a strong man?\u201d Ben asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, of course not,\u201d Hoss replied. He was frowning. \u201cThat\u2019s different.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy is it different?\u201d Ben enquired.<\/p>\n

There was silence. Joe looked from Hoss to Ben and back again. Hoss was still silent. \u201cDidn\u2019t we talk about this last night?\u201d Joe asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cSure did,\u201d Hoss responded gruffly. He scrubbed one large hand over his face and sighed. He looked at Joe. \u201cAn\u2019 ya know what? I reckon I ain\u2019t never gonna be quite so afraid o\u2019 the dark now. Like you on Eagle\u2019s Nest, Joe. I survived \u2013 nuthin\u2019 happened ta me. There weren\u2019t no shouts in the dark and no arrows singin\u2019 through the air. I survived.\u201d Hoss sounded rightly proud of himself.<\/p>\n

But Ben was feeling stunned. He made the right noises, but even though he responded normally to both his boys, he was facing the realisation that Hoss\u2019 fears had a tangible background of genuine fear \u2013 they weren\u2019t entirely the child\u2019s irrational fear of the dark and some imagined monster.<\/p>\n

Although Ben knew that the loss of his mother as a tiny infant had affected Hoss in a myriad of ways, it had never before occurred to Ben that the necessity of keeping watch at night had had any impact at all. He had thought that Hoss was too young to remember those times. Certainly, he never mentioned them at all while growing up. This was something he had not thought of.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa.\u201d The voice was Joe\u2019s and his youngest son was looking slightly worried. Ben blinked and looked around Joe\u2019s bedroom. Hoss was gone. He had not even noticed him leaving. \u201cHoss has gone to get coffee,\u201d Joe explained. \u201cAnd you were about to start blaming yourself for Hoss being afraid of the dark, weren\u2019t you?\u201d<\/p>\n

Once again, Ben was taken aback. \u201cHave you started mind reading?\u201d he enquired, although he knew that Joe was very intuitive.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo,\u201d Joe smiled. \u201cBut I know you. If something happens to us, you think you ought to have protected us. You can\u2019t all the time, Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t think Hoss would remember those nights,\u201d Ben admitted.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t think he really knew that the two things were connected until last night,\u201d Joe observed. \u201cAnd Adam would have seemed to have been the one you would expect to react to those times, I know. But we both know Adam was always capable of rationalising everything. But Hoss might have been afraid of the dark anyway, Pa,\u201d he reminded Ben. \u201cIt\u2019s not your fault, any more than it\u2019s his fault, or mine for not liking heights.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I suppose its not,\u201d Ben agreed. He sighed. \u201cYou\u2019re very wise for one so young,\u201d he teased.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen you have nothing else to do but sit in darkness and think, all sorts of things go through your mind,\u201d Joe replied. \u201cAnd I think perhaps Hoss might feel better now, because it\u2019s all out in the open. I know I did.\u201d He was again referring to the Eagle\u2019s Nest incident.<\/p>\n

\u201cI hope so,\u201d Ben agreed as Hoss came back in with a tray of coffee.<\/p>\n

****************************<\/p>\n

Hoss never entirely got over his fear of the dark, but as Joe had predicted, he did indeed feel better about it.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The End<\/p>\n

Title from Milton\u2019s Paradise Lost.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Summary:\u00a0 Joe and Hoss embark on a journey of discovery together.<\/p>\n

Rated:\u00a0 T \u00a0 (10,390 words)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":45,"featured_media":5963,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"template-full-width-post.php","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_members_access_role":[],"_members_access_error":""},"categories":[23,41],"tags":[17,16],"class_list":["post-5790","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-drama","category-hurtcomfort","tag-hoss","tag-joe","wpcat-23-id","wpcat-41-id"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/Moon-Blind.jpg?fit=640%2C480&ssl=1","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5790","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/45"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5790"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5790\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/5963"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5790"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5790"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5790"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}