Disclaimer: I do not own Bonanza or the Cartwrights. No copyright infringement is intended on Alex Sharp’s superb script, Old Sheba. Original plot and characters are property of the author. This story is for entertainment.<\/span><\/p>\n Reviews from the Old Library are on the last page.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n The Swedish Grizzly<\/strong><\/p>\n As the Tweedy Circus pulled into the town of Dayton, Joe nudged Hoss and pointed out the posters hanging on the mercantile that advertised the circus. Hoss and Joe stopped in front of a poster showing Hoss in a fighting stance. Emblazoned at the top of the poster in large letters was HOSS CARTWRIGHT\u2014THE SWEDISH GRIZZLY. Joe was excited to see that one hundred dollar winner\u2019s purse on the poster. Of course, Bear Cat Samson would get $75 of every $100 that Hoss won to send home to his wide and five children since Hoss had injured him during the match in Virginia City. The other $25 would be split between Joe and Hoss. Joe, of course, thought that he should get 75% of the $25 since he would be doing most of the work, promoting the wrestling matches. All Hoss would have to do is pin his opponents within the five minutes.<\/span> <\/p>\n
Mr. Tweedy told Joe to go over to the saloon with a couple of posters. He also told Joe to stir up interest in the wrestling match. Hoss and Bear Cat were sent over to the nearest hotel to get some rooms and to eat lunch in the dining room.<\/span>
Upon entering the saloon, Joe approached the bar and ordered a beer. He looked in the mirror over the bar as he sipped at his beer to see the saloon\u2019s clientele. There were a few cowhands sitting at a table and a few miners at another. None looked to be a match for Hoss\u2019 abilities.<\/span>
Joe turned around to look at the customers and cleared his throat. As all eyes turned to him, he held up a poster of Hoss. \u201cGentlemen, here\u2019s your chance to earn one hundred easy dollars. All you have to do is come to the Tweedy Circus tonight. If you can pin this bear of a man in five minutes, you get the hundred dollars. All comers will get a chance. Anyone up for this?\u201d<\/span>
Many of the men in the saloon snickered into their beers. A couple looked at Joe and noted how scrawny he was compared to the figure of Hoss on the poster.<\/span>
\u201cDo we get to take you on, too, boy?\u201d asked one customer.<\/span>
\u201cI think I could pin ya right now\u201d said another.<\/span>
More snickering followed these comments. Joe realized that he had to get attention on to Hoss so these men would come to the circus in a fighting mood.<\/span>
\u201cThe Swedish Grizzly can chop down trees with two swings of an axe! He can blast through a mine faster than dynamite! He can take on an angry bull with his bare hands! He can\u2026\u201d<\/span>
\u201cKid,\u201d one customer interrupted, \u201cif this Swedish Grizzly can do all that, why would any of us be fool enough to take him on?\u201d<\/span>
Joe had to think for a second. His answer had better be a good one or Mr. Tweedy wouldn\u2019t be happy. \u201cWomen find the brute strength of the Swedish Grizzly irresistible. In fact, many women swoon at the mere sight of him.\u201d<\/span>
Laughter broke out among the saloon customers. \u201cDo they swoon in fright, sonny?\u201d jeered one grizzled miner.<\/span>
\u201cAre they a\u2019feared that he\u2019ll drag \u2018em off to live in a cave?\u201d asked a cowhand while gasping for air between guffaws.<\/span>
Joe realized that he had just painted himself into a corner. He thought he\u2019d better think fast or there\u2019d be no takers for the match. Joe suddenly had a flash of absolute brilliance.<\/span>
\u201cWomen like a man who can eat, right? The Swedish Grizzly can eat a whole steer in one sitting. A woman watching him eat could think of nothing but cooking for such a man. Women also like a man who\u2019s handy around the home place, right? He can chop down trees in the morning, cut \u2018em into boards with an axe by afternoon, and have a white picket fence up by evening. Think on it, gents. Do you want the women around here to tend to the Grizzly\u2019s needs instead of yours?\u201d<\/span>
\u201cMaybe I should hire this Grizzly away from the circus so some work can get done around my place\u201d a cow puncher said. \u201cMy wife would sure like a fence around her flower garden.\u201d Gales of laughter followed this cowhand\u2019s remarks.<\/span>
Joe realized that he wasn\u2019t making any headway. \u201cAny man who doesn\u2019t step up to challenging the Swedish Grizzly might be viewed as scared. Don\u2019t any of you want a try at that hundred dollars?\u201d<\/span>
Seeing he wasn\u2019t making any headway with the saloon customers, Joe finished his beer and slunk out. He could hear laughter as the doors of the saloon swung shut behind him.<\/span>
As he walked up the sidewalk to the hotel, Joe couldn\u2019t help but notice two young ladies looking at the poster of Hoss. \u201cDo you suppose he\u2019s as big as that?\u201d asked one to the other.<\/span>
Realizing a sales opportunity, Joe decided if he could persuade the women that their men folk should take Hoss on, there would be several matches in the evening. \u201cAfternoon, ladies\u201d Joe said as he removed his hat. \u201cOne hundred dollars is a mighty large sum for wrestling a man. Think of all the things one hundred dollars could buy. Why, if I won that much money, I\u2019d buy my girl new dresses and hats in the latest fashion, take her to San Francisco, stay in the finest hotel, and eat meals fit for royalty. Yessiree, that\u2019s what I\u2019d do with the prize money if I won the match.\u201d<\/span>
Both ladies had hung onto Joe\u2019s every word. Their eyes had faraway, dreamy looks as he talked about San Francisco. One let out a sigh of longing and said \u201cI believe I\u2019ll tell my David to take on this Swedish Grizzly. I sure would like to see San Francisco.\u201d<\/span>
Her companion replied, \u201cNot if my Freddie wins first.\u201d<\/span>
Joe stepped out of the way as the ladies headed down the sidewalk. He hoped that they would spread the word among their friends who would then tell their men to attend the match.<\/span>
As Joe stepped into the hotel\u2019s dining room, he saw Hoss polishing off a steak. Bear Cat was finishing off some mashed potatos.<\/span>
\u201cC\u2019mon over here, little brother, and have a steak\u201d said Hoss gesturing with his knife and fork. \u201cMe and Bear Cat were just gettin\u2019 started on lunch.\u201d<\/span>
\u201cWhat do ya mean gettin\u2019 started?\u201d asked Joe.<\/span>
\u201cWhy we each had steaks and the cook is fixin\u2019 to send out another a piece. Plus, the cook has two apple pies in the oven for us. I\u2019ll let you have a piece of my pie if you\u2019d like\u201d offered Hoss.<\/span>
\u201cDo you think you\u2019ll be fit for wrestling if you eat all this?\u201d asked Joe incredulously. Hoss\u2019 ability for eating was famous in Virginia City. But he was supposed to be staying in fighting shape, not eating his way through the Nevada Territory.<\/span>
\u201cI wouldn\u2019t worry \u2018bout him\u201d said Bear Cat. \u201cHe\u2019s gotta keep up his strength for matches. He\u2019ll need the energy if there are a lot of takers tonight.\u201d<\/span>
As Hoss and Bear Cat finished off their pies, Mr. Tweedy walked in. \u201cBoys,\u201d said Mr. Tweedy, putting his hands on Hoss\u2019 and Bear Cat\u2019s shoulders, \u201cyou\u2019d best be gettin\u2019 up to your rooms to get some rest. Hoss, I want you ready for tonight.\u201d<\/span>
When Hoss and Bear Cat were out of earshot, Tweedy asked Joe how the recruiting had gone for the match. \u201cI went over to the saloon like you told me, but I couldn\u2019t get anyone interested.\u201d Tweedy knitted his brows together and looked as if he was going to snap off a rebuke. Joe quickly added \u201cI decided to try a different tack. I\u2019ve spread the word about the winner\u2019s purse among the ladies, who\u2019ll encourage the men to wrestle tonight.\u201d<\/span>
Tweedy couldn\u2019t believe what he was hearing. He didn\u2019t want to part with his money because of a stampede of would-be wrestlers who might win.<\/span>
By that evening, there was a crowd at the entrance to Tweedy\u2019s tent. Tweedy noticed that many of the men looked like they came ready to wrestle.<\/span>
As the time for the match to begin neared, Hoss became nervous. Joe was rubbing his tense shoulders and telling him that he could take any man there. Hoss noticed that many of the men were glaring at him while the women waited excitedly.<\/span>
\u201cWhat did ya tell these folks, Joe?\u201d asked Hoss.<\/span>
\u201cDon\u2019t worry, Hoss\u201d assured Joe. \u201cI told them all how strong you are and how much women admire your strength. Besides, would I say anything that could get us hurt?\u201d<\/span>
\u201cWho\u2019s us, Joe?\u201d asked Hoss with a gulp.<\/span>
Before Joe could answer, Tweedy announced the contest and asked the first challenger to step forward. A skinny, pimply-faced teenager stepped towards the ring.<\/span>
\u201cI cain\u2019t wrestle him, Mr. Tweedy\u201d said Hoss. \u201cI\u2019d snap him like a twig.\u201d<\/span>
\u201cYou have to take on all comers, Hoss\u201d said Tweedy.<\/span>
As the teenager approached Hoss, a young lady yelled out \u201cGet \u2018im, Ernie!\u201d<\/span>
Ernie took a swing at Hoss and the match began. Actually, Ernie was trying to hit Hoss but Hoss kept swatting Ernie\u2019s hands away. The crowd began to snicker as Hoss practically danced around the ring. He was so afraid of hurting Ernie that he kept dashing from one side of the ring to the other. By the end of the long five minutes (Hoss could have sworn a half hour had passed), Tweedy called time. The crowd was now openly guffawing at Hoss\u2019 antics.<\/span>
\u201cHe should\u2019ve been able to snap that beanpole in half with one flick of his wrist!\u201d one man yelled out.<\/span>
\u201cI didn\u2019t want to hurt that boy\u201d Hoss told Joe.<\/span>
The next challenger was a miner named Sam. Hoss noticed that Sam had some pretty strong looking arms. When Tweedy said go, Sam charged at Hoss, yelling \u201cI\u2019m gonna take down a grizzly!\u201d Hoss managed to flip Sam over his shoulders and pinned him within one minute. The crowd groaned at Sam\u2019s quick loss.<\/span>
By the sixth challenger, Hoss was getting tired. \u201cC\u2019mon, Hoss, hang in there\u201d encouraged Joe. \u201cJust think of all the money we\u2019re makin\u2019 tonight.\u201d<\/span>
\u201cYou mean all the money we\u2019re makin\u2019 fer Bear Cat and his family, dontcha, Joe?\u201d asked Hoss.<\/span>
\u201cYeah, that\u2019s what I meant\u201d answered Joe.<\/span>
The ninth challenger was a cowhand who seemed to think Tweedy was running a boxing match. Hoss took a punch to the left eye and then a jab to the right cheek. To keep from getting pummeled further, Hoss grabbed his opponent around the waist and hoisted him off the ground.<\/span>
\u201cGet \u2018im, Mike!\u201d should a feminine voice.<\/span>
Joe turned around to see a delicate looking redhead encouraging Mike to beat the tar out of Hoss.<\/span>
\u201cGet that griz so we can go to Frisco!\u201d yelled the redhead.<\/span>
Joe returned his glance to the ring where Mike was trying to get a grip on Hoss to bring him down. Joe gulped nervously, worried about what would happen if Hoss lost. He thought back to the match in Virginia City when Tweedy called time early because Hoss was squeezing Bear Cat\u2019s ribs so hard. Tweedy looked on worriedly, afraid he would lose another strong man so quickly.<\/span>
\u201cC\u2019mon, Mike!\u201d yelled the redhead again. \u201cYou\u2019ll pay if I don\u2019t get that trip to Frisco!\u201d<\/span>
\u201cJust what did you promise these folks?\u201d asked Tweedy, looking at Joe with narrowed eyes.<\/span>
\u201cI didn\u2019t promise anything, Mr. Tweedy. I only made a few suggestions to the ladies on how they might spend the prize money.\u201d Joe quickly turned his gaze back to the ring.<\/span>
Hoss had managed to bring Mike to his knees and was holding him down with a firm grip on his shoulders. Surely five minutes had passed by now, thought Hoss. Mike managed to fire off a punch to Hoss\u2019 belly. As the wind was knocked out of him, Hoss\u2019 tired body started to fall. The smile quickly faded from Mike\u2019s face as Hoss fell over on him in slow motion, pinning him to the floor.<\/span>
Joe and Tweedy quickly ran to Hoss\u2019 assistance to make sure he was alright. As they reached for one of Hoss\u2019 hands, the redhead ran for the ring. \u201cGet off a him, ya brute!\u201d she yelled at a dazed Hoss.<\/span>
Trying to be a gentleman in front of the lady, Joe extended a hand to Mike to help him up. Mike took Joe\u2019s hand and stood up. The redhead rushed to Mike\u2019s side to make sure he hadn\u2019t been hurt too badly.<\/span>
\u201cYou dream buster!\u201d yelled the redhead as she punched Joe in the eye. He fell backward into a sitting position as the crowd broke into a cheer.<\/span>
\u201cMaybe you shoulda wrestled the Grizzly, Maggie!\u201d yelled a miner in the crowd. More laughter erupted inside the tent.<\/span>
\u201cI shore would\u2019ve liked that trip to Frisco\u201d said Maggie rather wistfully.<\/span>
\u201cGive her my share of the winnings, Joe\u201d said Hoss. I feel badly that she cain\u2019t go on account of me fallin\u2019 on her man.\u201d<\/span>
\u201cYou\u2019re such a sucker, Hoss\u201d replied Joe. \u201cYou feel sorry for the first pretty face you see. How can I be expected to successfully manage your career of you give away your share of the prize money for every pretty face?\u201d<\/span>
\u201cWell, next time you can get in the ring\u201d answered Hoss. \u201cI believe this grizzly needs to hibernate for a few days so I can get my strength back.\u201d<\/span>
Joe sure hoped Bear Cat would be up to fightin\u2019 strength again soon. He didn\u2019t know if he could take two weeks of this. Maybe he could persuade Mr. Tweedy to let them out of their contract early, Joe thought, as his eye began throbbing. If Hoss only knew how he was sacrificing, thought Joe. Maybe he\u2019d be more grateful for my management, he thought as he headed for the hotel where they were staying. Joe could hear Hoss\u2019 snores from the lobby and thought that he\u2019d have to get Hoss up early in the morning for training. Oh, how he was sacrificing for Hoss\u2019 wrestling career!<\/span>
The End<\/span><\/p>\n
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