.\u00a0 *** Dear Lord \u2013 please don\u2019t let this scar \u2013 please \u2013 my boy has been through enough in his short life. *** <\/em><\/strong>Gently lifting one corner of the bandage Pa hesitantly took another look at the wound.\u00a0 The sutures were from the side of Joe\u2019s jaw upwards to his right cheek bone.\u00a0 Dropping his head down into his hands, Pa wept over the painful reality that Joseph, the boy who had been born with such a strikingly handsome face, would never be the same again.<\/p>\n
\n\u201cCome on in, Hop Sing,\u201d Hoss whispered and led the man inside to where Joe lay sound asleep.<\/p>\n
Adam stood from the chair where he had kept watch over Joe and approached the cook.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat do you have there, Hop Sing?\u201d he asked looking down at the basket the cook carried.<\/p>\n
The Chinese man who had helped Ben Cartwright raise all three of his sons apprehensively approached the bedside of the youngest member of the family.\u00a0 He set the basket on the nightstand and turned back towards both Adam and Hoss.<\/p>\n
\u201cMister Fletcher tell Hop Sing what happen to Little Joe \u2013 I fix chicken broth and bring here.\u00a0 Hop Sing vely worried,\u201d He replied settling a hand onto Joe\u2019s forehead.\u00a0 \u201cWhere Mister Ben?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWe made Pa go lay down in the other room,\u201d Hoss whispered as he drew closer to the bed.\u00a0 \u201cDoc warned Pa that if he didn\u2019t go down, he was going to give him a shot to knock him out.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cVely good,\u201d Hop Sing smiled.\u00a0 \u201cNow \u2013 Hop Sing see Little Joe\u2019s wound?\u201d<\/p>\n
Adam cleared his throat and tried to figure out what he could say to make Hop Sing understand the seriousness of Joe\u2019s injury without letting him peek underneath the wad of bandages.\u00a0 \u201cNot right now, Hop Sing.\u00a0 Doc sent someone from the front desk to fetch some ice from the blockhouse \u2013 but until he gets back with it, he told us to keep Joe\u2019s wound covered.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hop Sing\u2019s ebony eyes looked piercingly at the eldest son.\u00a0 \u201cMust know how bad!\u201d<\/p>\n
Hoss walked closer to the cook and dropped a hand down onto his shoulder.\u00a0 \u201cIt\u2019s pretty bad, Hop Sing.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hop Sing placed the palm of his right hand against Joe\u2019s left cheek and muttered a few words in Chinese that no-one in the room could decipher.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou have Little Joe drink chicken broth!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWe will,\u201d Adam assured the cook.\u00a0 \u201cDoc says we can bring Joe home in the morning.\u00a0 Why don\u2019t you go back to the ranch and get some rest.\u00a0 I know you\u2019ll be fussing over Joe once he\u2019s back in his own bed.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hop Sing nodded and then stared over at Hoss.\u00a0 \u201cYou eat, Mister Hoss?\u201d<\/p>\n
Hoss grinned and replied, \u201cYeah, I been eating downstairs here \u2013 mind you it sure ain\u2019t nowhere near as good as your grub, but I been eating.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cVely good.\u00a0 Mister Adam?\u201d<\/p>\n
Smiling, Adam also nodded.\u00a0 \u201cWe\u2019re eating \u2013 don\u2019t worry.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAlight \u2013 Hop Sing go back home and get food cooking for return.\u00a0 You tell Little Joe Hop Sing came?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWe\u2019ll tell him,\u201d Hoss agreed and walked the cook and caregiver out of the room.\u00a0 Opening the door to the suite Hop Sing turned back and looked up at the big man standing next to him.\u00a0 \u201cLittle Joe \u2013he be okay?\u201d<\/p>\n
Drawing in a deep breath Hoss didn\u2019t know how to tell the man who had raised Joe from an infant that the boy was going to carry a huge scar on his face for the rest of his life.\u00a0 \u201cWe hope so, Hop Sing.\u00a0 Now you just get yourself home safely and we\u2019ll all be eating your good cooking by tomorrow afternoon.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hop Sing read the look in Hoss\u2019 blue eyes and knew that Little Joe had to be in bad shape.\u00a0 He had always been able to read Hoss very well, and behind the attempt to reassure him, Hop Sing could tell the sadness that the man was carrying inside.\u00a0 \u201cHop Sing see tomorrow,\u201d he said and turned out of the suite.<\/p>\n
\n\u201cH \u2013Hoss?\u201d The weak voice called out.<\/p>\n
Hoss leaned in towards his brother and dropped one huge hand onto the boy\u2019s arm.\u00a0 \u201cYeah, Little Brother, right here.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe glanced around the room and tried to get his bearings.\u00a0 He closed his eyes as a sharp pain shot upwards from the right side of his jaw.\u00a0 It proceeded to climb until it grew so intense that he winced his face which only made his wound hurt and the sutures pull that much more.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s almost time for some more pain medicine, Joe.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe rolled his head on the pillow as Adam walked inside.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re finally awake,\u201d Adam grinned and set his hand on Joe\u2019s other arm so that he was protected and comforted by both of his brothers on either side.<\/p>\n
Joe nodded and then whispered, \u201cPa?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHe\u2019ll be in here in just a little while, Joe.\u00a0 Pa stayed up all night in the chair next to your bed \u2013 Doc forced him to go lie down awhile,\u201d Adam explained.<\/p>\n
\u201cSorry \u2013 sorry about — surrey –,\u201d Joe muttered and with each word the pain inside his mouth grew worse.<\/p>\n
\u201cHey, Kid \u2013 when do you ever show up anywhere on time?\u201d Adam joked as he and Hoss exchanged uncomfortable glances.<\/p>\n
When the room grew deathly quiet, Hoss tried to think of something to say to break the tension.\u00a0 \u201cYou think that you can try to drink, Little Joe?\u00a0 Hop Sing brung you some chicken broth all the way from the ranch.\u00a0 He told us to be sure to tell you that he came by and that he\u2019s thinking about you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWater,\u201d Joe whispered, still hurting with every movement he made with his mouth.<\/p>\n
Hoss hurriedly poured a glass of water and then stared down at his brother.\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cYou want to use the straw, Joe?\u201d<\/p>\n
Slightly shaking his head back and forth to signify \u201cno\u201d Joe watched as Hoss handed him the glass without a straw this time.\u00a0 With a lot of effort, he lifted his head off the pillow and attempted to sip the water slowly.\u00a0 Little Joe soon realized that the mere act of drinking had hurt even worse than trying to speak had.\u00a0 An involuntary groan escaped his lips.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re doing good, Kid,\u201d Adam tried to sound encouraging.<\/p>\n
After getting down a couple of sips Joe returned the glass to Hoss\u2019 hand and eased his head back onto the pillow.<\/p>\n
\u201cI was just telling Little Joe that it\u2019s almost time for his next dose of pain medicine,\u201d Hoss remarked to Adam.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo \u2013 don\u2019t wanna,\u201d Joe returned insistently.<\/p>\n
Before Hoss could protest or try to cajole his brother into having something to ease his pain, they heard a knock at the door and turned to see Doctor Martin standing in the doorway with his black medical bag in one hand and a bucket of ice in the other.<\/p>\n
\u201cBill sent this up,\u201d Doc smiled and handed the ice bucket to Adam as he drew closer to his patient.\u00a0 \u201cNow, Little Joe, what did I hear you just say about not taking that medicine I left for you?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t wanna,\u201d Joe repeated, his speech getting harder to understand.<\/p>\n
Paul sighed and sat in the chair which Hoss had vacated.\u00a0 \u201cWell, this ice will help you a bit \u2013 but you\u2019re still going to need that laudanum for a while yet.\u00a0 Adam, hand me that unused washcloth over next to the basin, will you?\u201d<\/p>\n
Adam did as he had been asked and both he and Hoss neared the bed to see if they could help the doctor tend their brother.<\/p>\n
Paul wrapped some of the pre-chipped ice inside the washcloth and folded it neatly.\u00a0 \u201cNow, let me just remove that bandage \u2013 here, Hoss, hold this a minute,\u201d Doc said and handed the prepared washcloth over to him.<\/p>\n
\u201cSure, Doc.\u201d<\/p>\n
The second Doc reached for one of the corners of the bandage Joe\u2019s hand shot up blocking the man\u2019s attempt at uncovering the wound.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo,\u201d Joe whispered, keeping his hand firmly on top of the bandage.<\/p>\n
Adam and Hoss turned towards the doorway when they heard someone clearing their throat.\u00a0 It was Pa and, evidently, he had been both listening and watching the goings on inside the room without making his presence known.<\/p>\n
\u201cNow, just what\u2019s going on in here?\u201d Ben questioned sternly as he crossed the room.<\/p>\n
\u201cOh, just your youngest \u2013 and as is typical he\u2019s trying to make my life difficult,\u201d Paul replied smiling as Ben approached him.<\/p>\n
Easing down on the right side of the bed next to Joe, Ben placed a firm hand on his arm.\u00a0 \u201cNow, Joseph, it looks to me like Paul has had a long day \u2013 how about you giving him a break and cooperating for a change?\u00a0 He\u2019s got that ice I\u2019ve been telling you about \u2013 it\u2019ll help ease some of your pain and cut down on that swelling.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCan\u2019t,\u201d Joe whispered and closed his eyes.<\/p>\n
\u201cCan\u2019t?\u201d Ben asked and cast a confused glance around the room, hoping one of the other three would figure out what was going on with the boy.\u00a0 \u201cWhy?\u201d<\/p>\n
Hoss had read what his little brother was thinking, they were always so close that it wasn\u2019t very hard to see what had been in the boy\u2019s eyes.<\/p>\n
\u201cLittle Joe \u2013 me and Adam wuz the ones who found you.\u00a0 Shucks we\u2019ve already seen that cut of yours and it\u2019s okay \u2013 you\u2019ve gotten hurt a lot worse, you know?\u00a0 Why — don\u2019t you remember that time you fell off that wild stallion we caught — the one that Pa told you to leave alone?\u00a0 Yeah, just as soon as you fell you knew you were in big trouble — then you came running to me to set that break in your arm so Pa wouldn\u2019t get after you for disobeying him.\u00a0 That old bone you busted was a sight I\u2019ll tell you!\u00a0 So, I\u2019ve seen a lot worse,\u201d Hoss attempted to put Little Joe\u2019s mind at ease since he knew that the boy was worried about anyone getting a good look at his wound.<\/p>\n
Joe opened his eyes as tears involuntarily slid out from their corners.\u00a0 Ben had seen it and he knew that the boy had realized the size of the cut now and what it must look like.\u00a0 Joseph had wanted to protect himself from witnessing the look of horror in the eyes of his family and Doc as well.<\/p>\n
\u201cBoys— it\u2019s almost five \u2013 you two let me sleep far too long,\u201d Ben began and shot them a warning gaze which let them in on the fact that he needed some privacy with their little brother.\u00a0 \u201cHow about the two of you going downstairs to find me a newspaper \u2013 I\u2019ve been out of touch for two days \u2013ever since my business up at Gold Hill?\u201d<\/p>\n
Adam read his father\u2019s intentions there in his eyes as did Hoss.\u00a0 He nodded over to him and replied, \u201cSure, Pa \u2013 we\u2019ll go get you one \u2013 and Hoss owes me a beer so maybe it\u2019s a good day to make him pay up?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWe\u2019ll be back in just a little bit, Joe,\u201d Hoss announced, handing the washcloth back to Doc.\u00a0 He smiled and patted his brother\u2019s shoulder.\u00a0 Both men left the bedroom closing the door behind them.<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay?\u201d Ben asked, raising his eyebrows as he looked at Joe.<\/p>\n
Drawing in a deep breath, though still worrying about what his face looked like, Joe nodded his head and allowed Paul to remove the bandage.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s about time, Little Joe,\u201d Doc scolded, but there was a twinkle in his eye that let the boy know he wasn\u2019t angry.\u00a0 \u201cMy hand\u2019s about got frostbite from holding this washcloth so long.\u00a0 Now let\u2019s just set it gently over your sutures for a bit and see how it does.\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben attempted to break the uneasy silence that had fallen over the room.\u00a0 \u201cYou see, Paul, I did like you asked me and got a good five hours of sleep.\u201d<\/p>\n
Doc knew what his friend was doing so he played right along.\u00a0 \u201cOh sure, Ben Cartwright!\u00a0 But it took me threatening you to get you to do it!\u00a0 You shouldn\u2019t complain so much about this boy and his stubbornness \u2013 he\u2019s just like his pa!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBad,\u201d Joe whispered.<\/p>\n
Ben and Paul exchanged concerned glances wondering what Joe had meant.<\/p>\n
\u201cBad?\u00a0 Is the ice making it worse, Son?\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe shook his head, \u201cFace \u2013 it\u2019s bad.\u201d<\/p>\n
Doc turned the washcloth over and reapplied it over the wound trying to come up with a good answer to what his patient had said.\u00a0 \u201cIt\u2019s a bad cut \u2013 no way to deny that, Joe.\u00a0 But we all know how fast you heal, right?\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe didn\u2019t answer but Pa noticed the quiver on his lips as his son fought not to break down and cry.\u00a0 He squeezed the boy\u2019s hand, willing strength into him.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019ve gone through a tough time, Joseph\u2014it\u2019s only natural for you to think the worst right now.\u00a0 You just give it some time.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe tried to wipe away a few spent tears on the sleeve of his nightshirt.\u00a0 \u201cHe said \u2013 he said it was a gift —,\u201d Joe trailed off and watched as his father and the doctor exchanged surprised glances.<\/p>\n
Paul removed the washcloth so he could replace the ice with some fresh chips and waited to see what Ben would tell his boy.<\/p>\n
\u201cA gift?\u201d Pa asked quietly.<\/p>\n
Joe nodded and replied, \u201cGift from my mother — a gift — to carry for — rest of my life.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat does your Ma have to do with this, Son?\u00a0 Do you know who hurt you?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHe \u2013 he had — accent \u2013 French,\u201d Joe stuttered and winced due to the pain it was causing him to speak.\u00a0 \u201cNo \u2013 no \u2013 name \u2013 don\u2019t know \u2013 but was someone who was — with her \u2013 like Marchant — Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben\u2019s face paled with his son\u2019s revelation.\u00a0 \u201cHe said that he knew her?\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe nodded, \u201cYeah.\u201d<\/p>\n
Paul cleared his throat and gave Ben a wary glance.\u00a0 \u201cListen you two, Joe isn\u2019t supposed to do any talking.\u00a0 There will be a time for all this later \u2013 but I need to get this youngster doctored and get some pain medicine into him before I make the rest of my rounds here in town.\u00a0 Now let\u2019s put this ice back on for just a few minutes, okay?\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben nodded over to Paul, understanding that they didn\u2019t need to get Joe more worked up than he already was at the time.<\/p>\n
\u201cHe\u2019s right, Joseph.\u00a0 This can keep.\u00a0 You just ease back and let Paul tend to you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHer fault,\u201d Joe whispered and closed his eyes.\u00a0 \u201cAll — all her fault.\u201d\u00a0 Before Ben or Doc could say another word, Joe had drifted back to sleep.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s for the best, Ben \u2013 the boy was too worked up,\u201d Paul whispered as he finished icing the wound.\u00a0 \u201cI don\u2019t want Little Joe talking too much for a while yet.\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben sighed and answered, \u201cHe\u2019s so upset \u2013 and he must\u2019ve awakened three- or four-times last night with some awful nightmares.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI imagine he would have, Ben \u2013 what with all that lunatic did to the boy \u2013 and on top of that whatever he said about Marie.\u00a0 I\u2019m worried about how Joe\u2019s going to react once he gets home and gets a look at his wound.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI am too, Paul.\u00a0 You saw how he acted when he thought that Adam and Hoss were going to see it.\u00a0 They were the ones who found him \u2013 so they know how bad it is — and they told Joe that.\u00a0 But he doesn\u2019t want anyone to see it.\u00a0 He only lets the two of us see it because we\u2019re the ones tending his wound.\u201d<\/p>\n
Doc stood and gathered up the bandage material he had set on the nightstand.\u00a0 He reached for a fresh towel and gingerly dabbed at the cut to dry it off.\u00a0 Next, he had Ben help him with the wad of cotton that he layered over Joe\u2019s wound securing it in place.<\/p>\n
\u201cThat will do until later, Ben.\u00a0 I want you to ice it good one more time tonight, okay?\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben nodded and began to help the doctor gather up the spent bandage and everything they had used to try and help Joe.\u00a0 \u201cIs it okay to bring Joseph home tomorrow?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes \u2013 let me have a look at his wound before you go and I\u2019ll give you more instructions then.\u00a0 You\u2019ll need to get some food into him \u2013 but only liquids,\u201d Paul stopped and pointed over at the jar Hop Sing had left.\u00a0 \u201cWhy don\u2019t you have the boys take that down to the kitchen here and see if they\u2019ll keep that warm for the kid?\u00a0 I\u2019m sure Hop Sing prepared it without any salt \u2013 he always seems to know what\u2019s needed depending on the injury.\u00a0 I want Joe to get something besides water and medicine in him tonight.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cGood idea,\u201d Ben nodded as he walked Doc out.<\/p>\n
Pausing before leaving the suite, Paul turned and looked at his friend.\u00a0 \u201cJust take this one day at a time, Ben \u2013 I know you\u2019re thinking ahead \u2013 but we need to take this slow for Joe\u2019s sake.\u00a0 None of us know what that wound is going to look like once I get those stitches out next week \u2013 or how it will look a few months down the road.\u00a0 Try not to worry, okay?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ll do my best.\u00a0 Thanks again, Paul.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ll see you in the morning — keep up with the pain medicine once the boy wakes up.\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben nodded and watched as Paul walked out into the hall.\u00a0 Sighing to himself he made his way back into his son\u2019s room.<\/p>\n
\n\u201cNo!\u201d Joe argued as loudly as he could with the swelling getting worse inside his mouth.<\/p>\n
\u201cLittle Brother, I thought you\u2019d be happy to be going home?\u00a0 I told you that I brung the buckboard back with me tonight when Adam and me went to the ranch to get a change of clothes for all of us.\u00a0 I\u2019ll drive you myself in the morning.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat\u2019s the problem?\u201d Ben asked.\u00a0 He came into the room with Adam who had a fresh bucket of ice in his hand while Pa carried a tray that had been sent up from the kitchen which had on it the broth from Hop Sing.<\/p>\n
Hoss stood from his chair and met his father by the foot of the bed.\u00a0 Pa and Adam set their labor down onto the nightstand and then turned towards Hoss.<\/p>\n
\u201cI don\u2019t know, Pa \u2013 Joe said he doesn\u2019t want to go home in the morning \u2013 but he won\u2019t tell me why,\u201d Hoss called out frustrated.\u00a0 He and Joe always had a relationship where they could talk candidly with each other but apparently not that night.<\/p>\n
Ben cleared his throat and cast a look at Joe who had his arms folded across his chest showing that his mind was made up about going home and for some unknown reason he didn\u2019t want to go back there.<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay, it\u2019s getting late.\u00a0 So, what I\u2019m going to do is go into the other room and get into my nightshirt and robe.\u00a0 In the meanwhile, you two boys see if you can talk sense into your little brother.\u00a0 Now as for you, Joseph,\u201d He paused and stared down at the boy and pointed his finger at him.\u00a0 \u201cYou drink that broth.\u00a0 We made sure that it wasn\u2019t too hot.\u00a0 All you\u2019ve had is water and medicine and Doc gave me strict instructions that you were to drink that broth tonight.\u00a0 When I get back here, I\u2019m going to put ice on your face, give you some medicine and then you\u2019re going to rest up.\u00a0 Now you three act right \u2013 your Pa is getting tired and cranky,\u201d he stated firmly, and turned out of the room.<\/p>\n
\nNot hearing any noise from outside the bedroom, Ben deduced that Joe must\u2019ve gone to sleep.\u00a0 But when he entered the room and stared over at his three sons, he realized that Joe was simply giving everyone the silent treatment.<\/p>\n
\u201cStill hasn\u2019t cracked, huh?\u201d Ben questioned looking back and forth between Hoss and Adam.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, Sir,\u201d Adam sighed and stood from the chair.\u00a0 \u201cHe\u2019s practicing his ignoring people skills I think, Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHe don\u2019t need no practice, Adam, he\u2019s done mastered it,\u201d Hoss quipped and walked over to his father who had now gotten into his bedclothes.<\/p>\n
Ben shook his head wearily and replied, \u201cHe knows better than to pull that stuff with me, Boys.\u00a0 You two go on to bed \u2013 I\u2019ll handle tonight since I got some sleep earlier.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cGoodnight, Pa \u2013 goodnight silent one!\u201d Adam called across the room.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou give Pa any of this silent business, Little Brother, and I\u2019ll come back in here and sit on you until you\u2019re forced to tell me to get up off you!\u00a0 Goodnight,\u201d Hoss grinned and walked out of the bedroom and closed the door.<\/p>\n
\u201cHere, Son,\u201d Ben handed Joe the broth that he could tell the boy hadn\u2019t even tried to drink.<\/p>\n
\u201cCold now,\u201d Joe muttered.<\/p>\n
\u201cWell, it wouldn\u2019t be if you had cooperated \u2013 now drink it.\u00a0 It\u2019s not going to hurt you,\u201d Ben returned sternly because he had to at the time.\u00a0 He felt awful for all that his son had endured but he couldn\u2019t let his sympathy interfere with trying to take care of him.<\/p>\n
Joe slowly got down half of what had been in the mug and set it back on the nightstand.<\/p>\n
Ben frowned and handed it back to Joe.\u00a0 \u201cFinish it up, Joseph.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCan\u2019t \u2013 hurts.\u201d<\/p>\n
Sighing, Ben sat down on the bed next to his son and put his hand on his shoulder.\u00a0 \u201cJust finish it for me, will you?\u00a0 You\u2019ve got to take in some nourishment \u2013 especially when you\u2019re taking strong pain medicine.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe lifted the mug to his lips and with a great amount of effort polished off the broth.<\/p>\n
Ben smiled and patted the boy\u2019s arm.\u00a0 \u201cThank you.\u00a0 Now we need to get that bandage off.\u00a0 I\u2019m going to do this as gently as I can so just hold still.\u201d<\/p>\n
Drawing his right hand up quickly, Joe covered his bandage blocking his father\u2019s move.\u00a0 \u201cNo.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cJoseph – come on I\u2019ve seen this — it\u2019s okay.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAwful,\u201d Joe whispered his eyes clouding with tears.<\/p>\n
Ben shook his head and gently pulled his son\u2019s hand off the bandage.\u00a0 \u201cI know that\u2019s how you feel \u2013 because it hurts so much right now.\u00a0 It has a lot of healing to do \u2013 it\u2019s only been two full days since you got hurt, Joseph.\u00a0 Now, you hold still for me, okay?\u201d<\/p>\n
Closing his eyes, Joe nodded and waited for his father to remove the bandage.\u00a0 He felt the tug of the material against his sutures as his father removed one corner at a time, finally freeing it from his face.<\/p>\n
\u201cThere now \u2013 I didn\u2019t pull too hard, did I?\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe shook his head and watched his father getting the ice pack ready.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t long before Pa had made him ease back against the pillows with the ice in place over the wound.<\/p>\n
\u201cNow \u2013 how about telling me \u2013 in as few words as you can \u2013 why you don\u2019t want to go home in the morning?\u201d Ben asked as he sat down in the chair.<\/p>\n
Pointing to the wound, Joe replied, \u201cThis.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYour cut?\u00a0 I don\u2019t understand, Son.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t want — don\u2019t want anyone \u2013 anyone seeing me,\u201d Joe stuttered and then tears filled his eyes again.<\/p>\n
Ben drew in a deep breath as he finally understood what the boy had been worried about.\u00a0 Joe hadn\u2019t wanted anyone to see him even with the bandage on.\u00a0 He struggled internally trying to figure out what to say that might allay Joe\u2019s fears, knowing how proud he\u2019d always been.\u00a0 This was a definite blow to his son\u2019s ego, having the large bandage covering the horrible wound underneath it.<\/p>\n
\u201cJoseph –,\u201d Ben began, searching for the right words again.\u00a0 \u201cWe won\u2019t be long \u2013 just long enough to get you into the buckboard.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t want \u2013 anybody \u2013 anybody — see me like this,\u201d Joe\u2019s voice shook as he responded trying hard to get his father to understand.<\/p>\n
Ben reached over to Joe and flipped the icepack and set it back onto the wound.\u00a0 \u201cI understand,\u201d He nodded to the boy.<\/p>\n
\u201cDark \u2013 go in dark,\u201d Joe whispered, the pain from underneath the icepack stabbing at his mouth with each word he managed to get out.\u00a0 Joe\u2019s tear-filled eyes scanned his father\u2019s face to determine if Pa understood his intentions.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s okay, Joseph,\u201d Ben nodded and placed his hand on top of his son\u2019s trying to calm him.\u00a0 \u201cWe can bring you back home as soon as it gets dark tomorrow.\u00a0 Now how\u2019s that?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cK,\u201d Joe answered.<\/p>\n
\u201cNow let\u2019s get you the medicine so you can go to sleep and maybe I can too.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe nodded as Pa filled the tablespoon and slowly drizzled it inside his mouth.\u00a0 Ben turned the ice over two more times in the next fifteen minutes and then prepared the new bandage.\u00a0 He moved to the bed and carefully dried around the sutures.\u00a0\u00a0 Right before he placed the bandage over the wound Joe\u2019s right hand stopped him again.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat is it?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cPa —-mirror,\u201d Joe said and pointed across the room where there was a bureau and on top of it sat a hand mirror.<\/p>\n
Ben stared over to where his son had motioned.\u00a0 There wasn\u2019t a chance in Hell that he was going to let the boy look at his wound; not yet.\u00a0 He had to be firm about Joe\u2019s request this time and brace himself in case the boy protested or, worse yet, decided to get out of bed and reach for it himself.<\/p>\n
\u201cListen here, Young Man, I am NOT<\/strong> getting you that \u2013 not now at least.\u00a0 I don\u2019t want you to look at this wound until it\u2019s had some time to heal.\u00a0 It\u2019s going to look a great deal better in a few weeks,\u201d He stated emphatically.<\/p>\n\u201cNever \u2013 scar for life \u2013 he said — gift from her,\u201d Joe replied bitterly.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, Joseph \u2013 no to both statements.\u00a0 It\u2019s not going to be a scar for your whole life \u2013 and it surely wasn\u2019t any kind of a gift \u2013 and never from your mother.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cPa,\u201d Joe cried out in desperation as tears began to fall from his eyes.\u00a0 He was physically injured due to his wound, and he was emotionally injured due to everything Francois had said about his mother.\u00a0 The evil man\u2019s words just kept on repeating in his mind and had done it even in his sleep.<\/p>\n
Ben leaned forward and secured the bandage over Joe\u2019s wound.\u00a0 Afterwards he pulled his son into his arms and just held onto him, allowing Joseph to cry it all out.\u00a0 There were no words that could ease the boy\u2019s pain and Pa knew it.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s going to be okay,\u201d He whispered as he held his son who had finally played out and was sound asleep held there in his arms.\u00a0 *** God —please— please \u2013 help my boy. *** <\/em><\/strong>Ben prayed.<\/p>\n
\nBen walked inside the bedroom where Joe was getting ready for the trip back home.\u00a0 He had a rough night, as had his father, trying to help him through quite a few nightmares.\u00a0 Doctor Martin had come by earlier on in the day and advised Ben on how to help care for Little Joe once they got back to the Ponderosa and told him that he would be coming out the following day to check on the wound.<\/p>\n
\u201cTake it easy, Joseph,\u201d Ben called over to the boy as he watched him pulling on his boots.<\/p>\n
Joe looked at his father and noticed the package he was carrying over to the bed.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t want to talk as it was too painful every time he had done it the past two days, but he shot Pa a questioning look as he sat down alongside of him on the bed.<\/p>\n
\u201cOh \u2013 this,\u201d Ben smiled and handed the box to his son.\u00a0 \u201cWell \u2013 your shirt and jacket \u2013 they \u2013 well \u2013 we couldn\u2019t save them.\u00a0 Hoss brought you that shirt you\u2019ve got on from the ranch, but I figured it was about time to get you a new jacket.\u00a0 That old blue one had seen better days.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe removed the top of the box and pulled out a green corduroy jacket.\u00a0 He just sat there and stared at it.<\/p>\n
Looking over at his son Ben could tell that the boy was caught up in the memory of that awful night again.\u00a0 He tried to think of something to say.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019ve always said that your favorite color is green \u2013 so when I saw that at the mercantile earlier today \u2013well I thought you might like it.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe wouldn\u2019t have smiled even if he could have at the time.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t because he didn\u2019t like the jacket, because he did.\u00a0 But it was the memory of what he had been wearing the night that his face had been carved up that made him sit there and look so forlorn.\u00a0 He knew from what Pa hadn\u2019t said that the reason that both his shirt and blue jacket weren\u2019t salvageable was because they were coated with blood from his wound.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s going to be okay, Joseph,\u201d Ben whispered, reading what was in his son\u2019s eyes.\u00a0 \u201cYou ready to leave?\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe placed his left hand on his father\u2019s arm and held it there for a minute trying to think of what he could manage to say that wouldn\u2019t hurt too much.\u00a0 \u201cNo-one \u2013 see me,\u201d His words came out adamant yet still a bit hard to understand due to the swelling from the cut that he had on the inside of his mouth.<\/p>\n
Ben shook his head and reassured, \u201cHoss already has the buckboard right outside the hotel.\u00a0 Nobody\u2019s around, Son.\u201d<\/p>\n
Satisfied by what his father had said, Joe stood from the bed and pulled the new jacket on.\u00a0 It fit perfectly and had it been any other occasion he would have smiled to see how good it looked on him.<\/p>\n
Ben reached over and popped the collar of the jacket up and smiled at his son.\u00a0 \u201cThere \u2013 you always kept the collar of that blue jacket up \u2013 let\u2019s keep with tradition.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe nodded and walked alongside his Pa as they made their way out of the suite and into the hallway.\u00a0 Peering apprehensively in both directions, Joe made sure that nobody was walking in or out of the other hotel rooms.\u00a0 He had been serious about not wanting to be seen and Pa watched as the boy slowly eased over to the staircase.<\/p>\n
\u201cRemember that Paul said for you to go slow, Joseph \u2013 there\u2019s no need to hurry,\u201d Ben whispered knowing that his son was weak from all the blood loss and that he was also dealing with the latent effects of the mild concussion he had incurred.<\/p>\n
The two Cartwrights made their way down to the bottom step just as the front door to the hotel opened and Linda Dow walked inside with her parents.\u00a0 Joe stopped dead in his tracks horrified that the girl might see him and the huge bandage on his face.<\/p>\n
\u201cLittle Joe!\u201d Linda called out and hurried to the stairs.\u00a0 She noticed the large bandage on the boy\u2019s face.\u00a0 \u201cOh, we heard about you getting hurt.\u00a0 How are you?\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe simply dropped his head down to his chest and tried his best to ignore Linda.\u00a0 He covered the bandage with his right hand, but the girl had already spotted it.<\/p>\n
\u201cMy parents and I were just coming for an early dinner, Joe \u2013 are you going to be okay?\u00a0 I heard that someone got a hold of you and cut your face.\u00a0 It must have been horrible for you,\u201d Linda continued to pry and all the while Joe never looked back up.<\/p>\n
\u201cExcuse me but my son and I must be going,\u201d Ben interrupted the girl and caught a hold of Joe\u2019s arm and helped usher him out of the hotel quickly.<\/p>\n
\u201cSorry, Pa — they got past me before I could warn you,\u201d Hoss apologized as he jumped down from the buckboard.\u00a0 He had seen Linda and her folks walk into the hotel at the last minute.<\/p>\n
\u201cLet\u2019s just get Joseph home,\u201d Ben whispered and assisted the boy into the back of the wagon.<\/p>\n
Joe eased down on top of the two bedrolls which had been spread out to cushion his ride.<\/p>\n
\u201cLook here, Joe,\u201d Adam called as he approached the buckboard.\u00a0 He pulled with him Cochise and tied her reins to the back railing of the wagon.\u00a0 \u201cWe figured you could use something nice to look at on the way home.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHome \u2013 now<\/strong>,\u201d Joe insisted staring at his father with worry all over his face.\u00a0 He rolled over onto his left side so no-one could get a look at him as the wagon headed back to the ranch.\u00a0 He held his right hand up over that side of his face to cover the bandage.<\/p>\nPa nodded and climbed up on the bench seat next to Hoss.\u00a0 \u201cLet\u2019s get this boy back home where he belongs,\u201d He whispered.<\/p>\n
\nHop Sing had been listening out for the return of his American family and came running out of the front door the moment that the buckboard pulled up in the yard.<\/p>\n
\u201cLittle Joe \u2013 Hop Sing vely happy to see you,\u201d The cook smiled and helped Joe out of the wagon.<\/p>\n
Joe just nodded to his old friend as they moved inside the house closely followed by his father and brothers.<\/p>\n
\u201cHave room all ready have broth on stove \u2013 two kind for you, Little Joe \u2013 so you choose okay?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHop Sing,\u201d Ben called to the man as he drew closer to him.\u00a0 \u201cDoc doesn\u2019t want Joseph to talk right now.\u00a0 Let\u2019s let him get some rest \u2013 it was a long trip home.\u00a0 Come along, Son.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe gave Hop Sing\u2019s shoulder a brief pat and walked up the stairs next to his father.\u00a0 He felt as though it had been a million years since he had been at home and was looking forward to being in his own bed.<\/p>\n
Pa opened the bedroom door and ushered his son inside.\u00a0 Joe stopped in his tracks when he spotted his bureau.\u00a0 The mirror was gone.\u00a0 He spun around and stared at his father with anger in his eyes.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, not yet, Joseph,\u201d Ben said sternly.\u00a0 He understood why his son now appeared to be upset.<\/p>\n
Joe stood and pointed over at the bureau and shook his head, frustrated by what his father had done.<\/p>\n
\u201cDoc doesn\u2019t want you looking at a mirror until you\u2019re healed up a bit.\u00a0 Now it\u2019s not going to hurt anything to wait, Son.\u00a0 Let\u2019s get your nightshirt on you and then you crawl into that bed and get some rest.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe broke away from his father and walked across the room.<\/p>\n
\u201cI had Adam take the hand mirror away too, Joseph.\u00a0 Just come over here and stop worrying about all that right now.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe pulled his jacket off and tossed it down into his chair.\u00a0 He was angry and not just about the mirror situation either.\u00a0 Joe was angry at his life and how it had spun out of control.\u00a0 He remembered that the last time he was there in his bedroom he was happily getting ready to go to the barn dance and hoping to get Linda to agree to go with him to the church social.\u00a0 Now the girl had seen him and knew that his face was carved up.\u00a0 He was mad about running into her.\u00a0 He was angry that nobody had stopped him from coming down the stairs in time.\u00a0 But most of all he was angry at the stranger who had cut up his face and angry at his mother for being the one to blame for why he had done it.<\/p>\n
\u201cJoseph,\u201d Ben began to choose his words carefully as he walked over to the boy.\u00a0 \u201cI know you\u2019re hurting \u2013 and not just physically.\u00a0 Let\u2019s just take this one day at a time, okay?\u00a0 Right now, you\u2019ve got to rest so you can heal up.\u00a0 We need to get some food into you too.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe stared up into his father\u2019s eyes and shook his head as his anger was replaced by an overwhelming feeling of utter hopelessness.\u00a0 \u201cPa –,\u201d He whispered, his eyes brimming with tears.\u00a0 \u201cNever — never be \u2013 the same.\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben pulled his son into his arms feeling almost as overwhelmed as his boy was at the time.\u00a0 \u201cYou are<\/strong> the same, Joseph,\u201d He responded quietly.<\/p>\n\u201cNo \u2013 no, Pa,\u201d Joe choked out, still hurting with every word he attempted to get out of his mouth.<\/p>\n
\u201cIn time, Son \u2013 in time,\u201d Ben assured the boy.<\/p>\n
\u201cTired,\u201d Joe replied and pulled himself away.\u00a0 He slowly began to unbutton his shirt as tears continued to drift down his cheeks. Grabbing the nightshirt, which Hop Sing had laid out on the bottom of his bed, he pulled it over his head.\u00a0 Then Joe removed his boots and the rest of his clothes.\u00a0 He then eased onto the bed, pulling his covers up around him.\u00a0 Ben watched as his son lay there motionless, his eyes staring blankly up at his ceiling as though in a trance.<\/p>\n
Making sure that Joe\u2019s head was propped up on his pillows before leaving the room, Ben eased out into the hall.\u00a0 He sighed wearily and then walked down the stairs.<\/p>\n
\u201cHow\u2019s he doing?\u201d Adam asked, meeting his father there on the last step.<\/p>\n
Ben shook his head and frowned.\u00a0 \u201cNot good, Son.\u00a0 It didn\u2019t help that we ran into that girl as we headed to the buckboard.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cGosh I\u2019m so sorry, Pa,\u201d Hoss apologized.\u00a0 \u201cAll\u2019s I did was turn my head for just a minute.\u00a0 Pete came over to ask me how Joe was doing and it took all I could to try and get him out of the way.\u00a0 That was Linda Dow \u2013 the new girl that Joe was trying to get to notice him at the dance.\u00a0 He\u2019s been wanting to get her to go to that church social \u2013 and \u2013 well she agreed before she left that night.\u00a0 Did she see him?\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben sank down into his chair by the fireplace and nodded.\u00a0 \u201cWorse.\u00a0 She caught us on the stairs so Joe couldn\u2019t run off.\u00a0 Then she said that she\u2019d heard that he\u2019d been cut \u2013 and \u2013 was busy asking questions with Joseph standing there just looking down and trying his best to hide the bandage.\u00a0 But she saw it of course.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cPoor kid,\u201d Adam remarked as he sat across from his father.\u00a0 \u201cI suppose he noticed that we took his mirror away when he got into his room?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes \u2013 and he wasn\u2019t very pleased.\u00a0 That boy is dealing with so much right now I\u2019m worried about him.\u00a0 He\u2019s got the pain from that wound \u2013 inside his mouth hurts and those sutures are pulling on his face pretty badly right now too.\u00a0 And on top of the physical pain is the emotional trauma he\u2019s going through.\u00a0 There\u2019s a lot of questions that need to be answered, but he\u2019s in such a fragile state right now \u2013 well \u2013 we\u2019ve got to give him a little more time before we go asking about everything that happened that night.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat can we do for Little Joe?\u201d Hoss asked.<\/p>\n
\u201cThere isn\u2019t much you boys can do right now.\u00a0 I have to bring ice up to him in a few minutes to help with that swelling.\u00a0 Paul said that\u2019s important along with keeping up with his pain medicine.\u00a0 Listen, I\u2019m going to keep the laudanum somewhere in the kitchen \u2013 I just don\u2019t want it — well\u2014\u201d Ben trailed off but his eyes told what was on his mind.<\/p>\n
\u201cPa \u2013 you don\u2019t think that Joe would try to take more than he needs?\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben shrugged his shoulders and replied, \u201cHoss, your little brother is distraught right now \u2013 and when someone is feeling that way \u2013 and is hurting a lot they can do foolish things.\u00a0 I\u2019m just going to make sure that Joseph won\u2019t do anything like that.\u00a0 Maybe I\u2019m just being overly protective \u2013 as usual \u2013 but I\u2019d rather err on the side of caution.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI don\u2019t think it\u2019s such a bad idea,\u201d Adam agreed.\u00a0 \u201cLet me go ask Hop Sing about the ice while you sit down for a few minutes.\u201d\u00a0 Adam offered and headed into the kitchen.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou want me to go up and stay with Joe?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSure \u2013 maybe if you\u2019d just sit with him \u2013 well at least he would have one of us.\u00a0 Joe might be asleep so ease into his room, Hoss.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hoss nodded and headed up to his little brother\u2019s room hoping all the while that he could help the boy in some small way.<\/p>\n
Before Hoss could get all the way up to Joe\u2019s room, there was a loud crash coming from upstairs that everyone heard.\u00a0 Ben sprang from his chair worrying that somehow Joe might have fallen from his bed.\u00a0 He met Hoss halfway up the staircase and the two of them ran the rest of the way, finally making it into Little Joe\u2019s room.<\/p>\n
\u201cJoseph!\u201d Ben shouted as he opened the door and spotted his son, dressed only in his nightshirt, throwing anything he could get his hands on around the room.\u00a0 He then noticed that the boy no longer had the bandage on his face.<\/p>\n
Joe went down onto the bare floor, kneeling with his hands held up over his face.\u00a0 As Pa and Hoss drew closer, they noticed a hand mirror broken into pieces lying on the floor next to the boy.<\/p>\n
\u201cJoseph \u2013 why?\u00a0 I told you what Doc said!\u201d Ben complained as he knelt alongside his son.<\/p>\n
\u201cI \u2013 I had \u2013 to \u2013 know,\u201d Joe sobbed still covering his face with his hands.<\/p>\n
\u201cLittle Brother—,\u201d Hoss started as he grasped for the right words that would comfort him.\u00a0 \u201cIt ain\u2019t gonna look like that for long.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cGo — away \u2013 don\u2019t look \u2013 Hoss,\u201d Little Joe pleaded.\u00a0 He felt that it was bad enough that Pa knew what he looked like, he didn\u2019t want anyone else to see the hideous appearance of his face.<\/p>\n
Turning to stare up at Hoss, Ben tilted his head to signal his middle boy out of Joe\u2019s room.\u00a0 He knew he would have to deal with the situation by himself.<\/p>\n
Hoss sighed and turned out of his brother\u2019s room feeling at a total loss over what to do to help Little Joe.<\/p>\n
Placing a hand onto his son\u2019s shoulder Pa whispered, \u201cI wish you hadn\u2019t done it — it looks worse now than it will after it heals, Son.\u00a0 It\u2019s got those stitches and it\u2019s all swollen.\u00a0 Joseph, it\u2019s going to get better.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cShe \u2013 she caused this \u2013 her gift \u2013 her fault,\u201d Joe choked out shaking his head full of disbelief over the extent of his wound.\u00a0 He had known it was bad due to how much it hurt, but it wasn\u2019t until he\u2019d gone across the hall and had stolen his father\u2019s hand mirror that he\u2019d found out how hideous he now looked.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, Joseph \u2013 no-one caused this other than the man who cut you.\u00a0 Now come on \u2013 let\u2019s get you up into your bed.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe rocked back and forth on his heels.\u00a0 \u201cI \u2013 I look \u2013 horrible \u2013 horrible,\u201d He stuttered.<\/p>\n
Ben attempted to pull his son into his arms to comfort him, but Joe resisted.\u00a0 \u201cYou — lied \u2013 never be the same \u2013 Pa — never!\u201d He cried out, and as he did, the wound inside his mouth began to bleed even more than it had earlier.\u00a0 And though it made him hurt far worse, Joe didn\u2019t care because he was too swept away with sorrow over the vision of his wound and how it would leave him with an unsightly scar for the rest of his life.<\/p>\n
Needing to resort to drastic measures, Pa forcefully pulled Joe\u2019s hands down from his face.\u00a0 \u201cNo \u2013 I didn\u2019t lie \u2013 you ARE<\/strong> the same!\u00a0 You have an injury \u2013 that needs healing — but you ARE<\/strong> the same, Joseph!\u201d<\/p>\nBlinking back tears Joe stared into his father\u2019s eyes and said, \u201cLook at me — with \u2013 your eyes \u2013 not your heart — Pa.\u00a0 Not \u2013 the – same,\u201d Joe insisted.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou are much more than your appearance \u2013 you\u2019ve always been beautiful in my eyes <\/strong>\u2013 but not because you are handsome.\u00a0 It\u2019s what you are inside that makes you beautiful, Joseph.\u201d<\/p>\nJoe shook his head hopelessly. \u201cNo-one looks at \u2013 what\u2019s inside \u2013 Pa \u2013 not if \u2013 you\u2019re ugly — on outside,\u201d His words came out filled with desperation as he choked on his tears.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m ugly \u2013 now — Pa,\u201d he insisted, his voice hitching in and out mimicking his shallow breathing.<\/p>\n
Ben reached over and tenderly pushed aside the tears as they rolled down his son\u2019s face.\u00a0 \u201cGive it time to heal \u2013 just give it time, Joseph, before you make any conclusions over what it will look like.\u00a0 It\u2019s not going to look like it does right now.\u00a0 Now \u2013 come on, Son, let\u2019s get you in bed.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe was weakened due to his injury and didn\u2019t have any fight left in him.\u00a0 The blood from the cut inside his mouth continued to flow faster due to him getting so upset and talking far too much.\u00a0 He allowed his father to pull him up off the floor and lead him to his bed.\u00a0 Joe crawled underneath his covers and fell asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow, leaving Pa standing there alone in stunned consternation.\u00a0 He made his way over to the nightstand and cut the bandage material, securing it over his son\u2019s wound.\u00a0 *** Oh Joseph. ***<\/em><\/strong> Ben sighed as he sat down in the chair next to the bed.\u00a0 Once again it was going to be another long night for the distraught father.<\/p>\n
\nDoctor Martin shook his head in frustration as he finished examining Little Joe the next day.\u00a0 He had noticed that the wound inside his patient\u2019s mouth appeared worse than it had looked the previous day and it worried him.\u00a0 He could also read the exhaustion on Joe\u2019s troubled face.<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay, I\u2019ve got to put my foot down now,\u201d Paul announced as he looked over at Ben sitting there on the bed next to his son.\u00a0 \u201cThis boy has been overdoing it.\u00a0 I don\u2019t want him to talk at all!\u00a0 If he needs to say something, then get him some paper and a pencil.\u00a0 That wound in his mouth is bleeding just as badly as it did two days ago.\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben sighed and placed his hand onto Joe\u2019s shoulder.\u00a0 \u201cIt\u2019s my fault, Paul, I should\u2019ve stopped him.\u00a0 He talked too much last night.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, I know all about it \u2013 Hoss told me when I got here about that hand mirror.\u00a0 Now, Little Joe, I told you that I didn\u2019t want you to look at your wound.\u00a0 It\u2019s natural that it looks worse now than it will later because it\u2019s only been a couple of days since it happened.\u00a0 Now, stop going against your doctor\u2019s orders for a change,\u201d Paul admonished his patient, but he also showed compassion on his face as he did it.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ll get him some paper, Paul.\u00a0 Now what else?\u201d<\/p>\n
The doctor sighed and stared into Joe\u2019s eyes.\u00a0 \u201cLittle Joe, it\u2019s not easy to drink when your mouth hurts, but you\u2019re going to have to try a bit harder.\u00a0 I need to get you started on soft foods, but we can\u2019t do that until you prove that you can manage more broth and the like.\u00a0 I was hoping for soft-cooked eggs in a day or so and maybe some porridge; things that wouldn\u2019t irritate your mouth or require you to chew so it won\u2019t bother your sutures.\u00a0 But you\u2019ve got to push yourself to get down whatever Hop Sing brings you to drink today and tomorrow.\u00a0 Okay? Don\u2019t speak just nod.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe nodded because he just wanted the examination to be over.\u00a0 He was at the point where he didn\u2019t care much about anything, even about getting well.\u00a0 Seeing his face had taken away all his desire to move forward with his life.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t believe one thing that either his father or the doctor had said.\u00a0 He figured that they were just saying that his wound would get better to keep him quiet and get him to cooperate with them.\u00a0 But he knew that a cut which was the size that he had seen the previous night wasn\u2019t going to go away, and if it did, it would without a doubt leave a long and very noticeable scar on his face.<\/p>\n
\u201cHave you been icing it, Ben?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, well we did twice yesterday.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cLet\u2019s move that up to three times a day for now,\u201d Paul announced and gathered his instruments, placing them in his medical bag.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019ll be back tomorrow to see how the wound is doing.\u00a0 Little Joe I expect a good report about you so don\u2019t you let me down,\u201d Doc smiled and patted the boy\u2019s arm as he turned to leave.<\/p>\n
Ben stood and walked Paul out of the room.<\/p>\n
\u201cSeeing that wound of his took a lot out of him, Paul.\u201d<\/p>\n
Shaking his head Doc frowned and replied, \u201cThat\u2019s why I didn\u2019t want him to go looking at any mirror.\u00a0\u00a0 I\u2019m sure it was a shock, and to be honest if I was a young man like Joe, it would\u2019ve thrown me for a loop too.\u00a0 He\u2019s just dealing with so much, Ben.\u00a0 It\u2019s bad enough he\u2019s got that wound but the way it happened and whatever that man said to the boy is eating him up on the inside too.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ll get him some paper \u2013 maybe if we let him tell us all about what happened to him \u2013 it might help some?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s worth a try.\u00a0 Now you get some rest and let Hop Sing help tend to the boy.\u00a0 I\u2019ll see you tomorrow.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThanks, Paul,\u201d Ben returned, shaking the doctor\u2019s hand as he made his way to the front door.<\/p>\n
\nLater that afternoon both Ben and Hop Sing brought ice to Joe\u2019s room.\u00a0 The boy had just awakened as the two men made their way inside and over to him.<\/p>\n
Pa sat down on the bed and reached for his son\u2019s bandage.\u00a0 Joe shot his hand up blocking his father\u2019s move.<\/p>\n
\u201cNow, Joseph, it\u2019s time to put ice on you to lessen that swelling.\u00a0 You heard Doc.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe pointed over to Hop Sing.<\/p>\n
Drawing closer to the bed, the cook and caregiver said, \u201cLittle Joe, Hop Sing help you \u2013 help you always.\u00a0 You let Hop Sing see \u2013 not to worry \u2013 alight?\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe shook his head and started to say something, but his father gripped his arm and shot over a warning look.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, Joseph, no talking.\u00a0 Now you wouldn\u2019t want to hurt Hop Sing\u2019s feelings, would you?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou see \u2013 I help you,\u201d Hop Sing smiled broadly trying to convince the boy.<\/p>\n
Ben reached over and pushed his son\u2019s hand aside and removed the bandage.\u00a0 Joe closed his eyes, afraid to witness the look of horror that he expected to see on Hop Sing\u2019s face.<\/p>\n
\u201cNot bad \u2013 just need time,\u201d Hop Sing called down to Joe.\u00a0 \u201cHere ice \u2013 it help,\u201d he said and handed the towel to Ben.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou see there, Joseph?\u00a0 Hop Sing said the same thing that I\u2019ve told you.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe shook his head presuming that Pa had told the other man exactly what he needed to say before coming up to his bedroom.<\/p>\n
\u201cI sit, Mister Ben, you go downstair,\u201d Hop Sing insisted and sat down in the chair by the bed.<\/p>\n
Giving up his place next to Joe, Ben stood and smiled down at the cook.\u00a0 \u201cDoc wants ten minutes on and ten minutes off.\u00a0 And then do that three times, okay?\u00a0 I\u2019ll be up shortly.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hop Sing nodded and pulled Ben\u2019s pocket watch off the nightstand and took note of the time.<\/p>\n
Walking to the bedroom door, Ben cast a look across the room.\u00a0 *** Well, it\u2019s a start \u2013 one down \u2013 two more to go before the boy lets the rest of the family help him. *** <\/em><\/strong>He thought to himself as he turned out into the hall.<\/p>\n
\nTwo days after Little Joe returned to the Ponderosa Sheriff Roy Coffee paid a visit to the ranch house.\u00a0 He was greeted by Hop Sing.<\/p>\n
\u201cMister Ben up with Little Joe, Sheriff,\u201d The cook announced as he led the man into the living room.<\/p>\n
\u201cIs it okay if I go up?\u201d<\/p>\n
Hop Sing nodded, \u201cYes \u2013 please to let me tell Mister Ben first.\u201d<\/p>\n
Roy nodded, \u201cI\u2019ll just wait here and you can let me know.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hop Sing walked up the stairs and down the hall to the boy\u2019s bedroom.<\/p>\n
Ben had just finished placing the bandage on his son\u2019s face after icing the wound good.<\/p>\n
\u201cSheriff down stair, he want see you.\u00a0 I say wait I ask.\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben turned to look at his son and asked, \u201cJoseph?\u00a0 Are you up to some questions?\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe shrugged his shoulders noncommittally and then finally nodded up at his Pa.<\/p>\n
\u201cTell Roy to come up, Hop Sing.\u201d<\/p>\n
The sheriff was waved upstairs by the cook and walked into Joe\u2019s bedroom.<\/p>\n
\u201cI hope I\u2019m not bothering you two,\u201d Roy said as he neared the bed.\u00a0 \u201cHow\u2019re you doing, Little Joe?\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe paused and stared over at his father.<\/p>\n
\u201cJoseph is not allowed to talk by orders of Doc Martin.\u00a0 But the boy has a writing pad if that\u2019ll help, Roy.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThat\u2019ll be just fine,\u201d He nodded and sat down in the chair next to the bed.\u00a0 \u201cI haven\u2019t had too much luck yet, because I ain\u2019t got a description other than Joe saying the man had a French accent.\u00a0 I did talk to Bill Gentry at the International House, and he did have a guest who he thought might have had an accent.\u00a0 He signed in as Frank Brown.\u00a0 The man left the morning before Joe was taken.\u00a0 Little Joe?\u00a0 You think you could manage to write me up a description?\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben handed the notepad and pencil to his son.\u00a0 \u201cJust try to remember whatever you can, Joseph.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe closed his eyes as the scene played out in his mind.\u00a0 He saw the man looking at him as he knelt there in front of him.\u00a0 He felt him running his hand through his hair and down his cheek.\u00a0 Joe started to shake and fought to catch his breath.<\/p>\n
Ben and Roy exchanged worried glances seeing the effect the memory was having on the boy.\u00a0 Pa was just about to put a stop to the whole thing when he noticed Joe was beginning to write.<\/p>\n
*** Man \u2013 French accent.\u00a0 Medium build.\u00a0 Six foot tall \u2013 or thereabouts.\u00a0 Dark eyes. ***<\/em><\/strong> Joe wrote the description and passed it over to Roy.<\/p>\nRoy studied the notes and said, \u201cThis helps some, Joe.\u00a0 But anything else you can tell me?\u00a0 Did he say how he knew you?\u00a0 Did he say why he cut you?\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben returned the pad to his son and Joe began writing, and as he did his father could see the intensity in his eyes and on his face.<\/p>\n
*** He said he had watched me for a while and had seen me at the dance.\u00a0 He followed me to livery.\u00a0 Hit me on the head.\u00a0 Next thing I knew I was tied to a tree in the middle of nowhere.\u00a0 He knew my mother.\u00a0 He said the two of them — ***<\/em><\/strong> Joe stopped writing and angrily pulled the paper from the pad and balled it up in his hands and threw it across the room.<\/p>\n\u201cJoseph \u2013 Joseph it\u2019s okay,\u201d Ben attempted to control the rage that he could tell was building up inside his son.<\/p>\n
Roy walked across the room and picked the paper up and smoothed it out.\u00a0 He read it then handed it for Ben to see.<\/p>\n
Ben scanned what his son had written and then stared over at Joe.<\/p>\n
\u201cGo ahead, Joseph, let\u2019s get this out in the open,\u201d He called softly and handed the notepad back to the boy.<\/p>\n
Joe\u2019s hand shook as he picked up the pencil.\u00a0 *** My mother rejected him.\u00a0 They had been together many times \u2013 he said he bought her things so she would \u2013 sleep –with him.\u00a0 But when he didn\u2019t have anything more to give her, she pushed him aside and scratched his face.\u00a0 He said she had tried to scar him but the scar went away.\u00a0 He wanted to scar me \u2013 he said as a gift from my mother.\u00a0 He said he was saving me from living the kind of life she led.\u00a0 He said no woman would ever want me\u2014after he was done cutting me – and he was right.\u00a0 He cut me \u2013 he ruined me \u2013 him and my mother. *** <\/em><\/strong>Joe handed the note to Roy.<\/p>\nThe sheriff read it and grimaced over what the boy had written.\u00a0 Roy passed it over to Ben for him to read.<\/p>\n
\u201cJoseph \u2013 don\u2019t believe what that evil man said.\u00a0 He had to be insane to take you and hurt you like he did,\u201d Ben tried to get through to the boy.<\/p>\n
Joe took the pencil in his hand again and wrote another note.\u00a0 *** It\u2019s her fault as much as his.\u00a0 If she hadn\u2019t done that to him then he wouldn\u2019t have needed to do what he did to me.\u00a0 I hate them both. ***<\/em><\/strong> Joe handed the letter to his father this time and not the sheriff.<\/p>\nBen read it but didn\u2019t share the message with Roy this time.<\/p>\n
The sheriff cleared his throat and spoke up, \u201cLittle Joe is there anything else \u2013 anything that might help us find this man?\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe drew in a deep breath and picked up the pencil one final time.\u00a0 His hand went back and forth on the page and Pa and Roy could tell that he was drawing something and not writing another message.\u00a0 When he was finally done, he handed it to Roy.<\/p>\n
After studying the drawing Roy handed it over to Ben.<\/p>\n
His face growing pale, Ben stared down at a picture of a strange looking knife.\u00a0 He tried to remember where he had seen one like that before.<\/p>\n
\u201cLittle Joe \u2013 is that what that man used on you?\u201d Roy asked.<\/p>\n
Joe nodded and his right hand went up to his face due to the vivid memory that his drawing had conjured.\u00a0 He felt the first stab of that sharp thin blade and then had blacked out due to the pain.\u00a0 Joe jumped off his bed and raced to the washstand.\u00a0 He leaned over and emptied his stomach.<\/p>\n
Roy and Ben exchanged worried glances.\u00a0 The boy had been petrified the whole time he had answered the sheriff\u2019s questions and neither man had known the effect it would have on him.<\/p>\n
Ben neared the boy and could see the blood which had come out along with the liquid breakfast Joe had drunk earlier.\u00a0 He reached for a towel and soaked it with water from the pitcher next to the basin.\u00a0 Placing it on the back of Joe\u2019s neck he shook his head sadly.\u00a0 He now wished he hadn\u2019t agreed to let the boy recall what had happened to him.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m sorry, Ben— Little Joe,\u201d Roy said and gathered the pieces of paper and placed them into his vest.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019ll see what I can track down.\u00a0 I\u2019ll let myself out.\u00a0 I\u2019m really sorry, Little Joe.\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben turned and nodded to the sheriff as he stood and left the room.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s alright, Joseph \u2013 it\u2019s alright,\u201d Pa whispered as he tried to help his son.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo \u2013 never \u2013 never alright,\u201d Joe moaned.<\/p>\n
\nA week passed by slowly, at least for all the Cartwrights.\u00a0 They marveled over how compliant Little Joe had become and that fact worried everyone.\u00a0 The boy did whatever he was told to do without the slightest bit of argument and that wasn\u2019t like him at all.\u00a0 He had always had a stubborn streak and tried to get his own way about things; but no more.\u00a0 Doctor Martin had pulled Ben aside after several trips to the ranch noticing the same thing that his father had.\u00a0 Paul was worried that Joe had fallen into a deep depression ever since the night he had seen his wound.\u00a0 And none of his family had been able to jolt the boy out of it though they tried every single day.<\/p>\n
While the Cartwright\u2019s were dealing with the aftermath of Joe\u2019s injury, Roy Coffee\u2019s investigation hadn\u2019t turned up much.\u00a0 The only break in the case so far had come about when he spoke again in length to the front desk manager at the International House Hotel.\u00a0 Once the sheriff had shown the man the description he had gotten from Little Joe, Bill Gentry had said that the man who had registered as Frank Brown seemed to fit all the particulars.\u00a0 He had also assured Roy that the man had indeed spoken with a French accent.\u00a0 That was good to know, but the sheriff needed more leads to continue the investigation and now they had all dried up.<\/p>\n
\nDoctor Martin made Little Joe sit in the chair next to his bed as he readied to remove the sutures.\u00a0 It had been a full ten days since the boy had been stitched up and they needed to come out.<\/p>\n
\u201cNow you just hold still, and I\u2019ll clip those knots and we\u2019ll see how well I did this time, okay, Little Joe?\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe simply nodded and closed his eyes ignoring both the doctor and his father who stood just off to his right side.\u00a0 Paul carefully began the arduous task of removing all the black knots which had held the wound together for over a week.\u00a0 It had taken almost ten minutes to free the boy\u2019s face of the sutures, but at last he stood and stretched his back.<\/p>\n
\u201cThat\u2019s got them, Little Joe,\u201d Paul smiled down at his patient.<\/p>\n
Ben didn\u2019t say anything right away because he just couldn\u2019t come up with something positive to offer his son.\u00a0 Though the sutures were out now, what remained was an awful sight, especially seeing it on his son\u2019s formerly handsome face.<\/p>\n
Grabbing a wet towel, Doc wiped any residue from the boy\u2019s wound and turned towards Ben.\u00a0 \u201cNow, just because I\u2019ve gotten the sutures out doesn\u2019t mean that this wound is healed.\u00a0 You need to keep icing it for at least another week, Ben.\u00a0 Joe?\u00a0 How\u2019s it feel?\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe shrugged his shoulders and didn\u2019t say a word.<\/p>\n
Paul shook his head and looked at Ben.\u00a0 \u201cIsn\u2019t that something?\u00a0 When I told this boy that he couldn\u2019t talk for a while, all he did was talk.\u00a0 And now that I\u2019ve told him he can talk he won\u2019t.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat would you like me to say?\u201d Joe asked, sarcasm in his tone.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m not a little kid, Doc, I know that you and Pa can see my face and how awful it looks.\u00a0 Do you want me to lie and say I feel all better?\u201d<\/p>\n
Paul dropped his hand onto Joe\u2019s right shoulder and replied, \u201cI was just asking you if it felt better not having those sutures in your face, Little Joe.\u00a0 Now as for how that wound looks \u2013 as I\u2019ve told you on numerous occasions \u2013 you have to give something like this time to heal.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe shook his head and tried to frown, though all the facial expressions that he had attempted to make ever since the day he had been cut hurt him so badly that they all came out like watered down efforts and no-one could tell if he was trying to smile or frown anymore.\u00a0 \u201cDoc, we all know that I\u2019m gonna end up with a big ugly scar.\u00a0 Why don\u2019t you all just tell me to get used to the idea of how it\u2019s going to be from now on instead of trying to fill my mind with false hope?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh?\u201d Doc asked as he raised his eyebrows.\u00a0 \u201cJust how many years were you in medical school?\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe simply shook his head and stood from the chair.\u00a0 \u201cListen, Doc, it\u2019s not that I don\u2019t appreciate all that you tried to do for me\u2014because I do.\u00a0 But you aren\u2019t a magician \u2013 there\u2019s only so much you can do.\u00a0 I\u2019d appreciate it if you\u2019d just put a bandage on me and let me go lie back down.\u201d<\/p>\n
Paul sighed, both worried and disheartened by the boy\u2019s attitude.\u00a0 He prepared another cotton bandage to cover the wound once more.\u00a0 \u201cLittle Joe, it\u2019s okay to wear a bandage for a little while every day \u2013 but I want you to start airing this out.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe continued to stand there as Paul secured the bandage over his wound.\u00a0 He reached up and made sure that it was held in place and then replied, \u201cThanks \u2013 but I don\u2019t want anyone to have to look at me.\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben exchanged concerned glances with Paul and shook his head over what his boy had said.<\/p>\n
\u201cHow about some coffee before you go, Paul?\u201d Ben asked, hoping to talk to the doctor about what he could do to help his son in private.<\/p>\n
Doc smiled and nodded, \u201cSounds good, Ben, I was up late bringing in a baby last night and I could use some!\u201d<\/p>\n
The two men walked to the bedroom door as Joe eased back up on his bed.\u00a0 \u201cJoe \u2013 I\u2019ll be by at the end of the week to check the wound and have another look at the inside of your mouth.\u00a0 You might be able to start on regular food very soon \u2013 maybe as early as this weekend.\u00a0 Now you be good and don\u2019t give your pa any guff!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThanks, Doc,\u201d Joe nodded over to the man as he and Pa stepped outside.<\/p>\n
\n\u201cJoseph,\u201d Ben called over to his son later that evening as he opened the bedroom door.\u00a0 \u201cWon\u2019t you come down for dinner?\u00a0 I know it\u2019s not much fun since you can\u2019t eat the same things that we\u2019ll be eating \u2013 but wouldn\u2019t you like to get out of your bedroom for a little while?\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe stared over at his father and shook his head.\u00a0 \u201cNo, Pa \u2013 you go on and eat.\u00a0 I\u2019m not hungry and I don\u2019t feel much like leaving my room tonight.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI wish you\u2019d just try, Joseph,\u201d Ben persisted, worried that the boy had spent far too much time in his room alone.<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t feel like it.\u00a0 Go on and eat, Pa,\u201d Joe stated with no hint of emotion in the cadence of his voice.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m still going to send Hop Sing up in a little while to bring you some broth.\u00a0 And if I were you, I wouldn\u2019t refuse him.\u00a0 He can be just as stubborn as you are,\u201d Ben warned and then left closing the door.<\/p>\n
Once his father had gone, Joe gave him time to get to the dinner table and then he snuck out of his bedroom.\u00a0 He stealthily made it to the top of the staircase making sure that he hadn\u2019t been seen.\u00a0 Joe just wanted to be sure that they were all seated and that Hop Sing was busy serving the food.\u00a0 He had taken the time to grab the lamp from his room and held it out in front of him as he walked into his father\u2019s bedroom.\u00a0 Joe neared the bureau and set the lamp down.\u00a0 Tugging his bandage off, he peered at his reflection and fought back the sickness in the pit of his stomach.\u00a0 Joe was certain that he would throw up as he examined the scar on his face.\u00a0 It was the first time that he had seen his wound without the stitches holding it together.\u00a0 Joe still remembered when he had stolen Pa\u2019s hand mirror a week ago and had gotten the first good look at his face.\u00a0 It had made him gasp aloud and then his rage took over, causing him to throw the mirror to the floor sending shards of glass all over his bedroom.<\/p>\n
Standing there in his father\u2019s room he had made up his mind what he needed to do, but he had one last person to talk to first.\u00a0 Lifting the lamp into his left hand, Joe turned out of Pa\u2019s room and walked out closing the door behind him.<\/p>\n
\n\u201cLittle Brother?\u201d Hoss called through Joe\u2019s bedroom door right after dinner was over.\u00a0 \u201cJoe \u2013 can I come on in?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYeah, Hoss \u2013 come on ahead,\u201d Joe answered as he sat up in his bed.<\/p>\n
\u201cHop Sing told me that when he brought you up some broth a little while ago that you said that you wanted to see me.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSit down for a minute, Hoss, okay?\u201d Joe asked and swung his legs to the side of his bed.<\/p>\n
Hoss nodded to his brother and sat down in the chair closest to the bed.\u00a0 \u201cWhat\u2019s up, Joe?\u201d<\/p>\n
Trying to gather his nerve over what he needed to talk to his brother about, Joe drew in a deep breath and began.\u00a0 \u201cHoss\u2014well \u2013you and me \u2013 we\u2019ve always talked straight with each other \u2013 haven\u2019t we?\u201d<\/p>\n
Hoss nodded and stared into Joe\u2019s eyes trying to figure out what he was trying to tell him at the time.\u00a0 \u201cYeah \u2013 we always have.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe drew in a deep breath and attempted to say what was on his mind.\u00a0 \u201cHoss \u2013 if I was to ask you something \u2013 something real important to me \u2013 would you tell me the God\u2019s honest truth?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat is it?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cJust answer me first, Big Brother.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hoss nodded and replied, \u201cIf it was really important to you \u2013 yeah I would, Joe.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay,\u201d Joe said as calmly as he could at the time.\u00a0 His left hand shook as it went up to his face.\u00a0 Gently tugging the bandage loose from his wound, he dropped it down into his lap and then stared intently over at his brother.\u00a0 \u201cHoss –,\u201d Joe continued, but his voice began to crack with emotion, there wasn\u2019t any getting around the fact that he was hurting but needed his brother\u2019s help.\u00a0 \u201cTell me \u2013 tell me the truth.\u00a0 Does this look as bad as I think it does?\u201d\u00a0 Joe\u2019s eyes clouded with tears as he looked into the penetrating blue eyes of the gentle giant before him now.<\/p>\n
Hoss dropped his head down a bit, trying not to look directly at his brother\u2019s scarred face.\u00a0 He knew he wouldn\u2019t be able to hide how badly he felt to see what had happened to the boy and how his face was marred in such a terrible way.<\/p>\n
\u201cC\u2019mon, Hoss, be my brother \u2013 tell me the truth,\u201d Joe pleaded, his voice shaking.<\/p>\n
\u201cLittle Brother \u2013 you just got those stitches out \u2013 it ain\u2019t gonna always look like it does right now!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDoes it look horrible \u2013 tell me \u2013 I need you, please, Hoss.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hoss\u2019 eyes teared up wanting to just leave the room and go and ask Pa to intervene, but he knew that he couldn\u2019t.\u00a0 Joe needed him, needed him to be honest with him.<\/p>\n
\u201cPlease \u2013 please, Hoss \u2013 be a brother \u2013 be a friend,\u201d Joe begged.<\/p>\n
Drawing in a deep and hurtful breath, Hoss stared into the hazel eyes and finally nodded.\u00a0 \u201cOkay —it don\u2019t look good \u2013 but that\u2019s right now \u2013 that don\u2019t mean it\u2019s always gonna be this way, Little Brother.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe\u2019s chin quivered as tears rolled down his cheeks.\u00a0 \u201cThanks, Hoss \u2013 I knew that I couldn\u2019t ask Pa or Adam \u2013 they\u2019d dance around a question like that.\u00a0 Thanks for being my brother.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hoss stood from the chair and sat down on the bed next to Joe and wrapped an arm around the boy\u2019s neck and said, \u201cShort Shanks, even with that wound— and even if it does scar\u2014well you\u2019re still better looking than me.\u201d<\/p>\n
Little Joe mopped his face with the sleeve of his nightshirt and replied, \u201cHoss, don\u2019t sell yourself short \u2013 there isn\u2019t anything wrong with the way you look.\u00a0 At least your face doesn\u2019t look like mine.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cJoe \u2013 why was this so important tonight?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI just needed to hear it \u2013 that\u2019s all.\u00a0 I mean I get tired of everyone trying to make it sound like I\u2019m complaining about a little thing \u2013 they don\u2019t realize that I know how bad it is.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cJoe \u2013 you\u2019ve got to give it time \u2013 wait and see \u2013 I betcha in a couple of months—,\u201d Hoss trailed off as his brother stared into his eyes and shook his head.<\/p>\n
\u201cNow come on, Hoss, I don\u2019t need to hear that one again.\u00a0 I\u2019m okay \u2013 I know what I\u2019ve got ahead of me.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat can I do for you, Little Brother?\u00a0 I\u2019d do anything for you\u2014anything to make you feel better.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe pulled his hands up and covered his eyes as his tears began to fall once again.\u00a0 \u201cThere isn\u2019t anything you can do, Hoss\u2014I know you\u2019d do anything\u2014but you have \u2013 by telling me the truth.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hoss patted his brother\u2019s back and returned, \u201cJoe, once you start getting around a little how about the two of us go hunting \u2013 or fishing or something to get you out in the fresh air?\u00a0 Being outdoors always helps me maybe it would help you?.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSure, Hoss \u2013 sure,\u201d Joe nodded, half-heartedly.\u00a0 \u201cHey \u2013 I guess I\u2019m getting tired \u2013 how about we talk about this tomorrow, okay?\u201d<\/p>\n
Hoss stood from the bed and placed his right hand down onto Joe\u2019s shoulder.\u00a0 \u201cYou gonna be okay?\u00a0 I can stay until you fall asleep?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m fine now, Hoss \u2013 really.\u00a0 Go ahead and get some sleep.\u00a0 I\u2019ll see you tomorrow.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hoss looked down at his little brother and could see right through the carefully crafted fa\u00e7ade he was wearing for his benefit.\u00a0 He could tell that the boy was devastated.\u00a0 Hoss couldn\u2019t get over the huge scar that ran down more than half of the right side of the boy\u2019s face.\u00a0 He couldn\u2019t blame Joe for being upset about it either.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ll see you tomorrow, Little Brother \u2013 you get yourself some rest, okay?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSure,\u201d Joe nodded and watched as Hoss made his way to the door.<\/p>\n
\u201cGoodnight, Joe.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNight, Hoss,\u201d He replied and watched as his brother walked out closing the door behind him.<\/p>\n
\nBen had come up the back stairs that led up from the kitchen on his way to go and talk to his youngest.\u00a0 When he arrived in the hallway, he was surprised to see Hoss standing about two doors down from Joe\u2019s room leaning with his face toward the wall.\u00a0 Drawing closer he heard the muffled cries coming from the big man.\u00a0 Hoss had his arm in front of his face and was using the inside of his elbow to muffle his sobs as he leaned there.<\/p>\n
\u201cHoss?\u00a0 Son \u2013 are you okay?\u201d Ben asked worriedly and placed a hand on his shoulder.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo\u2014no Pa \u2013 I ain\u2019t okay.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat is it?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI \u2013 I was in with Little Joe \u2013 oh \u2013 Pa!\u00a0 He made me \u2013 he made me\u2014tell him the truth.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t want to, Pa\u2014but I had to.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThe truth?\u201d Ben asked confused.\u00a0 \u201cTruth about what?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThat scar of his \u2013 he said he needed me to be a brother and a friend and tell him the truth about whether it looked bad like he thinks it does.\u00a0 I\u2019m sorry\u2014sorry, Pa.\u00a0 I told him the truth.\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben frowned and shook his head.\u00a0 \u201cHoss \u2013 turn around here, Boy\u2014let me talk to you.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hoss finally turned to face his father, blotting his eyes on his shirtsleeve.<\/p>\n
\u201cJoe shouldn\u2019t have put you in that position \u2013I\u2019m sorry, Hoss.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI shouldn\u2019t have said it \u2013 but he took his bandage off \u2013 and \u2013 oh Pa \u2013it is bad \u2013 real bad.\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben sighed and nodded, \u201cI know, Son \u2013 I know it is.\u00a0 Now I want you to go and get some sleep.\u00a0 I\u2019m going to talk to Joseph right now \u2013 don\u2019t worry, okay?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m powerful sorry, Pa \u2013 I shouldn\u2019t have told him the truth.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo— he asked you to be honest, Son \u2013 you did right.\u00a0 Now go on, Boy– -get some rest it will be alright.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hoss nodded to his father and lumbered down the hallway towards his bedroom.<\/p>\n
Ben shook his head as he watched his middle boy\u2019s devastation.\u00a0 Joe\u2019s injury was getting to everyone in the family, and he knew that it was time to talk to the boy and attempt to be honest with him.\u00a0 He walked down to his youngest\u2019s room and walked in without knocking.<\/p>\n
\u201cJoseph \u2013 I want to speak with you,\u201d he said as he moved over to the bed.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat is it, Pa?\u00a0 I was getting ready to go to sleep,\u201d Joe complained.<\/p>\n
Ben pulled the extra chair out from his son\u2019s desk and pointed at the boy to get off the bed.\u00a0 \u201cYou sit down there, Young Man,\u201d he indicated the chair next to the bed.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDo it,\u201d Ben insisted, not willing to take no for an answer that night.\u00a0 He pulled the chair along with him until he sat opposite the boy in the other chair.\u00a0 \u201cYou and I need to talk.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m tired.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cFine\u2014you can go to sleep as soon as we\u2019re done,\u201d Ben returned and stared over at his son\u2019s face.\u00a0 Joe had placed the bandage back over the wound after speaking with his brother.<\/p>\n
Joe frowned and broke his father\u2019s stare by looking down at the floor.<\/p>\n
\u201cI just spoke with Hoss\u2014you shouldn\u2019t have put your brother in that position, Joseph.\u00a0 He\u2019s very upset over what he said to you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAt least he told me the truth\u2014better than I get from you,\u201d Joe retorted with anger on his face and in his tone of voice.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ve told you the truth \u2013 just like Doc has.\u00a0 No-one knows how bad that scar will be until the wound has had a chance to heal.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cFine.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cJoseph \u2013 what I have to say to you doesn\u2019t have a thing to do with how you got hurt \u2013 who did it \u2013 or anything else.\u00a0 I want to talk to you about where your head is right now.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe looked over at his father and groaned.\u00a0 \u201cPa — just look at me for God\u2019s sake!\u201d He yelled and yanked the bandage off his face.\u00a0 \u201cYou tell me \u2013 does this look like me?\u00a0 No \u2013 it doesn\u2019t and you know it!\u00a0 And it\u2019s horrible \u2013 and you won\u2019t even admit it because it\u2019s my mother\u2019s fault that it happened!\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben reached over and grabbed his son\u2019s hand and held onto it tightly.\u00a0 \u201cI said we\u2019re not talking about how it happened \u2013 that will be for another time.\u00a0 I\u2019m aware that you\u2019ve gone through a terrible ordeal\u2014but we can\u2019t talk all of that out in one night.\u00a0 There\u2019ll be a time for that, Joseph.\u00a0 It\u2019s your wound and what it\u2019s done to you that I\u2019m talking about right now.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat it\u2019s done to me, Pa?\u201d Joe asked, desperation easily read in the inflection of each word that he had used.\u00a0 \u201cIt has ruined my life\u2014that\u2019s what it\u2019s done to me!\u00a0 I can\u2019t even leave this house for fear of someone seeing me.\u00a0 I can\u2019t even sleep unless I\u2019ve got this bandage on!\u201d Joe shouted.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m nothing now \u2013 why can\u2019t you see that?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIs that really how you view yourself, Son?\u201d Ben asked incredulously.<\/p>\n
\u201cYes \u2013 I\u2019m nothing.\u00a0 For years everyone\u2019s always had all three of your sons pegged \u2013 I mean everyone knows it.\u00a0 Adam \u2013 he\u2019s the smart one\u2014he\u2019s the college man \u2013 the architect!\u00a0 Hoss \u2013 well, he\u2019s the strongest of the three of us \u2013 and he\u2019s the one with the biggest heart.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAnd you?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh, come on, Pa!\u00a0 You know that everyone thinks I\u2019m the handsome one!\u201d Joe insisted loudly.\u00a0 \u201cWhat am I NOW<\/strong>?\u00a0 NOTHING<\/strong> that\u2019s what!\u201d<\/p>\n\u201cOh, Joseph,\u201d Ben shook his head sadly, feeling so much pain over what his son had said that it made his heart hurt.\u00a0 \u201cYou can\u2019t possibly think that.\u00a0 Is that how you\u2019ve always seen yourself?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYeah sure,\u201d Joe nodded.\u00a0 \u201cUntil now.\u00a0 I\u2019m just an ugly scarred young man who\u2019ll have to spend the rest of my life with a big bandage over half of my face.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBeing handsome \u2013 well \u2013 yes you\u2019ve always been that.\u201d Ben paused, \u201cbut that\u2019s not what I see when I look at you.\u00a0 I see someone with feelings and humor and a zest for life.\u00a0 That\u2019s what always made you beautiful in my eyes, Joseph, far more than your face ever did.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay, Pa \u2013 you\u2019re my father \u2013 you would try to see the best in me\u2014but let\u2019s face it – that\u2019s not how the rest of the world always saw me.\u00a0 And the fact is that from now on I\u2019ll just be known as the ugly one.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThe only way you\u2019d ever be ugly is if you let this scar control you and poison you and take away the beauty that\u2019s always been inside of you, Son.\u201d<\/p>\n
Tears fell from Joe\u2019s eyes as he cried out, \u201cPa \u2013 look at me!\u00a0 My face is scarred!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI know it\u2019s scarred \u2013 don\u2019t you think I feel it?\u201d Ben asked desperately, his voice shaking and his face taking on a stricken look.\u00a0 \u201cYou are a part of me \u2013 do you think that I didn\u2019t feel every single suture that Paul put on your face? I did!\u00a0 What was done to you was done to me, Joseph!\u00a0 I hurt \u2013 I hurt for you \u2013 and I feel the pain that you feel.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe turned his face away from his father and pulled the bandage up, placing it back over his scar.\u00a0 \u201cI can\u2019t do this, Pa,\u201d Joe whispered as he dropped his face into his hands.\u00a0 \u201cI can\u2019t live like this, I can\u2019t.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI know what you did tonight.\u00a0 I know that you went into my room and looked at yourself in my mirror \u2013 and that\u2019s what started all of this.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI had to see \u2013 see if it was as bad as it was a week ago.\u00a0 And it was worse than that.\u00a0 I just can\u2019t live like this \u2013 don\u2019t you understand?\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben grabbed his son\u2019s wrists and forced him to lift his head.\u00a0 \u201cI know what you\u2019ve been planning, Joseph.\u00a0 And I\u2019m not going to let you do it!\u00a0 Now, where is it?\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe refused to look at his father, he simply turned his face in the other direction.\u00a0 \u201cLet it be, Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo,\u201d Ben stated emphatically.\u00a0 \u201cYou are more than a perfect face, you are a good person, and you know right from wrong.\u00a0 And what you\u2019ve been planning is wrong, Joseph, and you know it!\u00a0 You are my son \u2013 my youngest and I am NOT<\/strong> going to lose you.\u00a0 Now you\u2019re going to fight through this.\u00a0 Whatever may come \u2013 you\u2019re going to keep living.\u00a0 You and I will find a way over it, under it, around it, or through it if we have to but we\u2019re going to get through it one way or the other.\u201d<\/p>\n\u201cOh, Pa \u2013 I don\u2019t have your strength \u2013 I never did.\u00a0 Don\u2019t expect it of me,\u201d Joe sobbed.<\/p>\n
Ben reached over and lifted his son\u2019s chin to direct his gaze.\u00a0 \u201cI do expect it of you \u2013 because you are <\/strong>my son\u2014that means you are part of me.\u00a0 And I expect you to be stronger than me by the time I get done with you!\u00a0 Now go ahead \u2013 hand it over, Joseph.\u201d<\/p>\nJoe stared into his father\u2019s eyes and read the fierce determination in them.\u00a0 He pulled himself to standing and walked slowly to his bureau.\u00a0 Pulling open the top drawer, Joe lifted out a bottle and brought it over to his father.\u00a0 He handed it down to him.\u00a0 It was the laudanum.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo more of this, you understand, Joseph?\u00a0 No more.\u00a0 If you feel like it\u2019s getting to be too much for you \u2013 well\u2014you come to me and whatever may come \u2013 we\u2019ll somehow get through it.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI can try, Pa\u2014but I still don\u2019t know if I can do this — I don\u2019t know,\u201d Joe trailed off with an overwhelming sadness very evident in what he had conveyed.<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, you can,\u201d Ben nodded adamantly.\u00a0 \u201cOne day at a time and one step at a time, Joseph.\u00a0 I\u2019m not making light of any of this \u2013 I know we\u2019ve got a lot to work through \u2013 but right now\u2014I just need to know that you won\u2019t do this ever again.\u201d<\/p>\n
Filled with remorse for making his father worry, he dropped his head down to his chest and then replied quietly, \u201cI shouldn\u2019t have taken it \u2013 I won\u2019t do it again.\u00a0 But \u2013 I\u2019m afraid, Pa \u2013 afraid of even going outside \u2013 even with my bandage on.\u00a0 It was getting to me \u2013 ever since I looked into your mirror.\u00a0 And that\u2019s why I had to ask Hoss about how I look now \u2014to make sure that I was doing the right thing. I\u2019m sorry, Pa — it was wrong \u2013 it was wrong what I had been planning to do tonight.\u201d<\/p>\n
Ben stood and wrapped his arms around the boy, pulling him to his chest.\u00a0 His fierce hold was filled with an increased urgency to it, due to his worry over what he had almost lost.\u00a0\u00a0 In the tightness of his embrace, Pa offered his son his own strength until Joe could regain his.\u00a0 \u201cJoseph, I love you.\u00a0 Please don\u2019t let this destroy you.\u00a0 Let me help you, Son.\u00a0 Let\u2019s just take it slow from here on out, okay?\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe nodded his head, trying to assuage his fears though they still felt both overwhelming and insurmountable at the time.<\/p>\n
\u201cHow about we start with that bandage?\u00a0 You\u2019ve been wearing it all the time.\u00a0 How about you start by taking it off when you\u2019re asleep?\u00a0 You\u2019ve got to start somewhere – -what do you think?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m not going out without it, Pa!\u201d Joe insisted, worried that it would be his father\u2019s next suggestion.<\/p>\n
Ben offered an understanding smile as he reassured his son, \u201cNo \u2013 I\u2019m not asking you to do that right now.\u00a0 Just when you go to sleep at night.\u00a0 How about it?\u201d<\/p>\n
Hesitating at first, Joe finally conceded, \u201cOkay, but just when I go to sleep at night \u2013 that\u2019s all.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell, let\u2019s start right now,\u201d Ben announced and reached for the bandage and gently removed it from his son\u2019s face.\u00a0 \u201cNow \u2013 go on to bed.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe walked across the room and sat down on his bed.\u00a0 He warily looked over at his father who still held the bandage in his hand.<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t worry,\u201d Ben grinned knowingly. \u00a0He walked to the nightstand and set the bandage next to the bed.\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cIt\u2019ll be there tomorrow when you wake up.\u00a0 Then I\u2019ll expect you to put that on and come down to the breakfast table.\u00a0 We all miss you, Joseph.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joe nodded and eased back on his bed.<\/p>\n
\u201cGoodnight, Son.\u00a0 It\u2019s going to be alright\u2014you\u2019ll see,\u201d Pa assured.\u00a0 He pushed the curls off his son\u2019s forehead and placed a soft kiss upon it.<\/p>\n
Joe watched as his father walked out of the room.\u00a0 He was worried and he still didn\u2019t know how he\u2019d ever live a normal life now due to his terrible scar but at least he hadn\u2019t gone through with his plan to end it all.\u00a0 He closed his eyes and fell off to sleep.<\/p>\n
Ben stood outside Joe\u2019s bedroom door leaning up against it.\u00a0 Sighing with relief he stared down at the bottle of laudanum in his hand.\u00a0 He had discovered that it was missing earlier in the evening and presumed that it had to be Joseph who had taken it.\u00a0 There was enough of the medicine left inside of the bottle to have killed the boy.\u00a0 ***Thank you, Lord! ***<\/em><\/strong> Ben thought and drew in a deep breath.\u00a0 He knew that Joseph was overwhelmed by all that had happened to him.\u00a0 And he was aware that there was still so much to be worked through concerning who had cut him and how Marie might be involved.\u00a0 But for right now it was enough that the boy was safe and in his own room.\u00a0 Ben saw Hoss peeking out from his doorway looking at him with questioning eyes.<\/p>\n\u201cIt\u2019s okay, Hoss, nothing to worry about — go on to bed,\u201d He whispered and then watched his middle boy moving back into his bedroom.\u00a0 Quietly sending off a short prayer of thanksgiving, he walked down the stairs.<\/p>\n
\nHop Sing silently climbed up the stairs from the kitchen making a three-a.m. visit into the youngest Cartwright\u2019s bedroom.\u00a0 He padded over to where Little Joe lay on his bed sound asleep, the right side of his face very visible now that he had removed his bandage.\u00a0 The boy lying there had been the baby who Hop Sing had helped raise and had loved like a son.\u00a0 He had taken care of him every time he had been sick or hurt in some way.\u00a0 Hop Sing had listened to the little boy\u2019s problems as a small child and had even run interference for him when he had gotten into trouble with his father.<\/p>\n
Holding his lantern closer to the boy in the bed Hop Sing quietly muttered a few words in his native language and then reached down, pulling the covers around Joe\u2019s shoulders.\u00a0 He turned and set the lamp onto the nightstand and reached inside the pocket of his smock.\u00a0 Hop Sing removed the letter which had already been written and sealed.\u00a0 He would be sending it off the following day and prayed that his instincts would prove to be correct.\u00a0 Little Joe, \u201chis\u201d<\/em> <\/strong>Little Joe, needed help and there was only one person that he knew who he could turn to who might be able to assist the boy in order to heal him.<\/p>\n*** Not to worry, Little Joe.\u00a0 Hop Sing help you \u2013 just as always. ***<\/em><\/strong> Hop Sing thought and tenderly placed the palm of his left hand on the sleeping boy\u2019s scarred face.\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cNo night so long that you can\u2019t find the day.\u00a0 No day so wrong that you can\u2019t find your way,\u201d He whispered and then silently eased out of the bedroom.<\/p>\nThe End<\/strong><\/p>\n***The first in the series, this story will continue with the sequel titled, \u201cNo Night So Long\u201d. ***<\/strong><\/p>\nWritten by Wrangler<\/p>\n
1-16-2026\u00a0 \u00a0***Feedback is not required but is always appreciated.\u00a0 Thank you for reading! ***<\/p>\n
***The character in this story, Rene Marchant, can be found in the story titled, \u201cAlways My Son\u201d ***<\/p>\n
(Dedicated to Rob, the story consultant and so much more to me.)<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Summary: Francois Balantaire, a spurned suitor of Marie Cartwright’s, travels two thousand miles and twenty years to seek vengeance on her by scarring her son, Little Joe. Rating T, WC 24,425 Links to stories in the series are included within.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":140,"featured_media":61594,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"template-full-width-post.php","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_members_access_role":[],"_members_access_error":""},"categories":[1015,23,1008,41],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-61540","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-joe-pa","category-drama","category-family","category-hurtcomfort","wpcat-1015-id","wpcat-23-id","wpcat-1008-id","wpcat-41-id"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/Screenshot_20260110_020703_YouTube-1.jpg?fit=1228%2C955&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/61540","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/140"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=61540"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/61540\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/61594"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=61540"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=61540"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=61540"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}