{"id":6450,"date":"2014-05-04T09:23:36","date_gmt":"2014-05-04T13:23:36","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=6450"},"modified":"2025-02-18T19:12:45","modified_gmt":"2025-02-19T00:12:45","slug":"dead-of-winter","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=6450","title":{"rendered":"Dead of Winter (by Monette)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Summary:\u00a0 <\/span>A rare story of how the Cartwrights survived one particularly bad winter.<\/p>\n

Rated:<\/span>\u00a0MA\u00a0 (5,510 words)
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

Dead of Winter<\/strong><\/p>\n

January, 1857<\/p>\n

Ben Cartwright attempted to stand.\u00a0<\/strong> But dizziness forced him back onto the settee.\u00a0 He had stumbled all the way down the stairs and now doubted he could make it back up.\u00a0 The habit of expecting breakfast to be waiting fuels a man who\u2019s starving to death, even when the thought of it had long past died of hopelessness.\u00a0 And he wasn\u2019t even as bad off as his boys, as they\u2019d gotten in the habit of sneaking some of their portions onto his plate until he stopped them\u2014so long ago.\u00a0 When they still had food.\u00a0 How many days now without?\u00a0 He couldn\u2019t remember.<\/p>\n

Finally Ben got to his feet.\u00a0 With a hard beating heart and the hope of the slowly dying, he stumbled to the door and looked outside.\u00a0 On the Ponderosa, his expansive ranch high up in the Sierra Nevada Mountains near Lake Tahoe, snow sat heavy and deep, glistening like the many sword blades of the Mexican cavalry and just as deadly. \u00a0No sign of the January thaw\u2014just deep and gut wrenching cold.\u00a0 The Cartwrights were isolated, alone, out of supplies and he had to admit it\u2014he and his three sons were dying.\u00a0 January thaw was due weeks ago but no sign of it.\u00a0 Ben shut the door again and fell against it before righting himself.<\/p>\n

\u201cHop Sing!\u201d\u00a0 But no, Hop Sing ran out of here three days ago, wielding a heavy butcher knife and a rifle, swearing to return with meat or die trying.\u00a0 \u201cI no see Cartlight men turnee to bones,\u201d he had yelled.\u00a0 Ben wondered, with a mind unable to focus, if the Chinaman had been properly dressed for the Tahoe weather, or if he even had enough meat left on his bones to withstand the frigid air.\u00a0 \u201cMeat on his bones.\u201d\u00a0 Everything became food to a man starving, he realized.<\/p>\n

How would the Chinaman find game when they had all tried for weeks and failed?\u00a0 The game was down in the valley for the winter, they all knew that, along with the winter stock, and so hope in all of them died, the spirit losing its will even before the body.\u00a0 Hop Sing had gone mad and now lay out in the snow, frozen to death.<\/p>\n

And there wasn\u2019t a damn thing Ben could do about it.<\/p>\n

Ben sat again\u2014more like collapsed\u2014into the settee and put his head back.\u00a0 No way to feel comfortable anymore.\u00a0 Everything hurt.\u00a0 No food at all for five days. \u00a0That all?\u00a0 Felt like five months.\u00a0 \u00a0And before that, starvation rations for nearly a month. \u00a0They had eaten all their animals except for the remaining three saddle horses.\u00a0 Plenty of hay for them but they\u2019ll starve too with no one to feed them.\u00a0 No sense leaving them alive.\u00a0 He had to butcher another horse today. \u00a0They all agreed. No more time to wait.\u00a0 He kept hoping Hop Sing would return first, because as long as he was out there, there was a glimmer of something in his veins Ben recognized as hope.<\/p>\n

An odd feeling, hope.\u00a0 Not something Ben could remember living his life for, because there was always something to do, somewhere to go, and hope was just for someone who didn\u2019t have the brains, brawn or back for hard work.\u00a0 Now since all he had was hope, he found it kept returning, and that alone meant he was still alive.<\/p>\n

They hoped for the thaw every day so that a horse, still living, could carry one of them to Eagle Station, down in the valley.\u00a0 But if they ate all the horses, then what?\u00a0 None of them were in any condition to walk it.\u00a0 But the snow had piled so high on the mountain that the thaw would have to last two weeks for even a sleigh team to break through.\u00a0 And would have started last week.<\/p>\n

Still, he hoped.\u00a0 They\u2019d already been through so much together, breaking horses, breeding stock, and picking up land by making long excursions in every direction.\u00a0 Ben found a smile on his face at the memory of explaining to Joe, years back, how they increased their herd size.\u00a0 Sometimes they didn\u2019t wait for the natural mating.\u00a0 Ben told Joe about breeding techniques by hand and then showed him\u2014and how big Joe\u2019s eyes got at realizing what they were doing.<\/p>\n

Now Ben had to kill Buck.\u00a0 Family.\u00a0 The last gift from Sutter, and Ben had to break Buck himself.\u00a0 A rifle would be easiest, but then the sons would hear it and perhaps refuse to eat. \u00a0They all felt the pain of starvation but really didn\u2019t feel much hunger anymore.\u00a0 So they might refuse and Ben couldn\u2019t bear that. [1] \u00a0A knife plunged into Buck\u2019s heart?\u00a0 What if he missed?\u00a0 He never had to kill a horse quietly before, and a frightened horse could kill him easily.\u00a0 Ben Cartwright never figured to die easy.<\/p>\n

How did they get in such a desperate situation?\u00a0 Early snows cut off the pass, isolated them.[2]\u00a0 But they\u2019d had early snows before and were always prepared.<\/p>\n

This time everything went horribly wrong\u2026<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

The front door opened and slammed.\u00a0 \u201cPA!\u00a0 They found gold at Spooner Creek!\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben had been waiting for his youngest son, who had already missed supper by an hour.\u00a0 \u201cThat\u2019s not what I expect to hear, Joseph.\u00a0 What about selling those head of stock?\u00a0 The winter snows are coming and we need supplies—.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, you don\u2019t understand.\u00a0 They found gold on our land and now—.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe have just one concern right now, young man, and that is to get this ranch ready for the long winter ahead.\u00a0 You know what we do to trespassers\u2014and they know it, too.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYessir.\u201d\u00a0 Joe hung up his hat and walked to the table to see if Hoss had left him any food.\u00a0 \u201cWhere\u2019s Hoss and Adam?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou never mind them.\u201d\u00a0 Ben strode to the table, his heavy arms crossed over his chest.\u00a0 He often worried that he gave his 15-year-old too much responsibility for his age, but Joe kept demanding to be allowed to do as much as his brothers.\u00a0 So Ben made the tasks he gave Joe sound very important, and increased the importance as he earned it.\u00a0 This time he might have given him a little too much.\u00a0 \u201cTell me what I need to know, Joe.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI was on my way, Pa, honest. I had the five steer all going with me real nice.\u00a0 But then these three guys, they come to me and ask if I knew you. \u00a0And I says, well, depends.\u00a0 So then they tell me about the gold and I rode with them and then we followed the creek apiece and doggonit, Pa, we should go out and get it before they do!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd what happened to the five steer?\u00a0 You know it\u2019s all the cattle we can spare—.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I left them grazing, for just a little while, Pa.\u00a0 They\u2019re pretty well protected, I think.\u201d\u00a0 He swallowed some milk and gave Ben a white-mustached grin.<\/p>\n

\u201cI need a straight answer, Joe.\u201d\u00a0 Ben crossed to the table where dishes had been cleared except his brandy glass and the food Joe was eating.\u00a0 \u201cHow old are you, young man?\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe looked down at his finger tracing the hole in the tablecloth.\u00a0 \u201cOld enough.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOld enough to admit you don\u2019t know where the stock is, right?\u00a0 A simple job, locate them, deliver them, and bring the money home, that\u2019s all.\u201d\u00a0 Ben sat at the table and picked up his brandy glass, but the golden liquid couldn\u2019t quell this feeling in his gut.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, I know where they are, Pa.\u00a0 Charlie and Stu are watching \u2018em.\u00a0 Just for tonight, because it was getting so late.\u00a0 I\u2019ll go back and finish the delivery tomorrow.\u00a0 Well, I had to, Pa, I had to tell you about the gold.\u00a0 I thought you\u2019d be\u2026\u201d he shoved a piece of bread in his mouth, suddenly less animated.\u00a0 \u201cExcited.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cCharlie and Stu?\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe stared up at his pa a moment before his eyes dropped and he threw the bread down on his plate.\u00a0 \u201cYou don\u2019t know who they are, do you.\u201d\u00a0 He slowly lifted his eyes to meet Pa\u2019s.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I don\u2019t know who they are.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe leaped to his feet and grabbed a handful of slice pork.\u00a0 \u201cLet\u2019s go find \u2018em, Pa.\u00a0 You know what we do to trespassers.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s too late, Joe, you want to wander around out there with torches?\u00a0 Cattle get skittish around torches.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss ran in the front door and slammed it behind him.\u00a0 Joe sat back down, hoping to hide and eat at the same time.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa!\u00a0 Pa!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIn here, Hoss.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss ran to the dining table.\u00a0 \u201cOur cattle\u2019s been stolen, Pa!\u00a0 The cattle Joe was\u2026\u201d\u00a0 He saw Joe slouched at the table.\u00a0 \u201cOh hi, Joe.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHow do you know that, son?\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss\u2019s face was red from the wind and his exertion.\u00a0 As Ben\u2019s biggest son, he preferred to take things slower, and told his brothers he could get more done that way.\u00a0 \u201cThese two fellers, I tried to stop \u2018em because I saw the steer with our brands on \u2018em, but one of them drew down on me so quick there was nothing I could do!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat must have been Charlie and Stu.\u201d\u00a0 Ben turned and glared at Joe.<\/p>\n

Joe slunk down in his seat.<\/p>\n

\u201cHuh?\u201d\u00a0 Hoss looked from one to the other with no answer forthcoming.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s all the ruckus?\u201d\u00a0 Adam walked down stairs fastening his pants, his red shirt unbuttoned. \u201cCan\u2019t a man get any sleep around here?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben put a hand on Adam\u2019s shoulder.\u00a0 His eldest had been ailing lately and was trying to catch up on his sleep.\u00a0 \u201cSorry, Adam, but Hoss and Joe—.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, there\u2019s a—.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben put a hand up at Hoss.\u00a0 \u201cOur cattle\u2019s been—.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t—!\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam put a hand on Joe\u2019s shoulder as Joe tried to stand in protest. \u00a0\u201cI think I got it.\u00a0 Little Joe, while you were in charge of the herd, our cattle got stolen, right?\u201d\u00a0 Adam broke the tense silence that followed by clearing his throat. \u201cHeard there was a bad group coming through, men looking for gold, looking to take whatever they could.\u00a0 Sorry, Joe, I should have warned you.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben shook his head.\u00a0 \u201cDon\u2019t blame yourself, Adam, you haven\u2019t been well enough to think clear lately.\u00a0 I heard rumors, too, but figured we didn\u2019t have enough up here for them to bother with.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, what are we going to do, Pa?\u00a0 You know what the Paiutes told us about a bad winter coming.\u00a0 Think Sal over at Eagle Station will float us for those supplies?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben looked at his hands clenching the table, and unclenched them.\u00a0 \u201cNot sure, Adam.\u00a0 Ever since that ruckus with his sheep\u2026\u201d He shook his head.\u00a0 \u201cWe\u2019ll be fine.\u00a0 But we\u2019ll have to try to find those men and our cattle.\u00a0 I suggest that since we can\u2019t do anything now we all get a good night\u2019s sleep.\u00a0 We\u2019ll get up early tomorrow and get on their trail.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam finished buttoning his shirt.\u00a0 \u201cI could take a lantern, look around.\u201d\u00a0 He walked to the door and looked outside.\u00a0 \u201cNo moon out.\u00a0 Makes it more difficult.\u00a0 Wait a minute.\u201d\u00a0 He walked outside, barefoot, and after a minute came back in.\u00a0 \u201cSnowing.\u201d<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Ben heard a rustling upstairs.\u00a0 Someone else had enough energy to get out of bed this morning. \u00a0He felt a vague rush of surprise\u2014they\u2019d all been gradually losing stamina over the past two months, and now, after five days with no food at all\u2026He couldn\u2019t imagine any of them having the desire to exert energy, but after a moment Joe walked down the stairs, not steady, but walking.<\/p>\n

\u201cAny sign of Hop Sing?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNone.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, I gotta go out, there\u2019s gotta be some cattle wandering.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cCattle\u2019s not enough, Joe.\u00a0 We\u2019re not just out of meat, we\u2019re out of everything.\u00a0 Fruit, bread, onions.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know, Pa, we\u2019ll get scurvy, but at least we won\u2019t starve to death.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSit down, son, before you fall.\u00a0 You won\u2019t last two minutes out there.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m okay, Pa.\u00a0 But you should see Hoss.\u00a0 His skin is just hanging on him.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd Adam?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, he ain\u2019t been the same since we found his horse froze in the snow.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know.\u00a0 He\u2019s probably hungrier than the rest of us because he couldn\u2019t eat much of it.\u201d[3]<\/p>\n

Joe collapsed onto the settee next to Ben.\u00a0 \u201cYou know what we should do, Pa?\u201d\u00a0 When Ben didn\u2019t answer Joe leaned over him.\u00a0 \u201cWe should let more people move in around us.\u00a0 Then we\u2019d have some neighbors to borrow from.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNext year, Joe.\u201d\u00a0 Ben sat up suddenly, making his head throb.\u00a0 \u201cDid you hear that?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo.\u00a0 Did it sound like a cow?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not sure.\u201d\u00a0 Ben forced himself to his feet.\u00a0 \u201cMaybe Hop Sing?\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe and Ben went to the door and looked out, but a blinding wind blew snow into the room and they shut the door again.<\/p>\n

Ben leaned against Joe.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019ve got to shoot a horse.\u00a0 We gotta force ourselves to eat Buck.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe nodded, tears glistening in his eyes.\u00a0 \u201cI know, Pa.\u00a0 I\u2019ll go tell Adam and Hoss.\u00a0 Don\u2019t worry, Pa, we\u2019ll eat it.\u00a0 We all feel bad about not getting those supplies\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Hop Sing swung his heavy knife in the air as he yelled at Adam for coming back empty-handed.\u00a0 \u201cYou not bling supplies!?\u00a0 You see list?\u00a0 You takee list?\u00a0 You forget???\u00a0 Your pa break open big box and give you coins plenty for food.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNow Hop Sing, just settle down.\u201d \u00a0Adam carefully took the knife from the Chinaman\u2019s hand and turned back to the dining table.\u00a0 \u201cPa needed us to track down the cattle thieves.\u00a0 I\u2019ve got the list.\u00a0 I\u2019m going.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cToday not enough.\u00a0 Today and yesterday not enough.\u00a0 Today, yesterday and tomollow maybe enough.\u00a0 How you goin do that?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll bring twice as much home today.\u201d\u00a0 Adam started for the door but Hop Sing followed.<\/p>\n

\u201cAlleady snow.\u00a0 You not find what you need at Eagle post, you go Truckee post.\u00a0 Then to Mormon Station.\u00a0 Get stranded.\u00a0 Die in snow.\u201d[4]<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not going to die in the snow.\u00a0 It\u2019s gotta come down in buckets for the horses and wagons to get bogged, and there\u2019s only a couple inches out there.\u00a0 No problem.\u00a0 Probably going to rain later this week, too.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss burst into the house, hitting Adam with the door.\u00a0 \u201cAdam, we got problems!\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam grabbed the door and his jaw and glared at Hoss.\u00a0 \u201cKeep coming in the house that way you\u2019ll have worse ones.\u00a0 What\u2019s wrong with you?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThem cattle thieves, they done it again.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u2018Oh, no, they went after the winter herd?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYup, got five of \u2018em, including the one we just bred!\u201d<\/p>\n

Hop Sing grabbed Adam\u2019s arm.\u00a0 \u201cYou lookee for cattle thieves instead of winter stock for kitchen, and not get either one?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cListen, Hop Sing, I know you\u2019re busy, but would you mind going for the goods today?\u201d\u00a0 Generally the Cartwrights preferred not asking this because they knew what tends to happen to Hop Sing when he goes to any of the posts alone.\u00a0 Just about everyone in the area despised these newcomer Chinamen and took every chance to let them know.<\/p>\n

Hop Sing stared hard from one to the other and back again, his ponytail bobbing angrily.<\/p>\n

Hoss shrugged and placed a hand on Hop Sing\u2019s shoulder. \u00a0\u201cListen, Hop Sing, you know I would just plume waste away without my nourishment.\u00a0 Tell you what, Adam and me will take the wagon and look for cattle thieves and go to Eagle Station, all right?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah,\u201d Adam nodded.\u00a0 \u201cWe\u2019ll see if we can hire us some more protection for what\u2019s left of the winter herd in the valley, too.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFind us a cattle guard, Adam?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSomething like that.\u201d<\/p>\n

They dashed out into the light snow before Hop Sing could brandish the knife again.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou think we can get everything done, Hoss?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cGuess we gotta, Adam.\u00a0 Tell you what, you take the wagon and follow me along, and when we\u2019ve done lost the trail of them thieves, you\u2019ll head down to Eagle Station for the supplies and the guard, and I\u2019ll head back to reassure Hop Sing, so he don\u2019t go and do nothing foolish.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, no, you don\u2019t.\u00a0 You made the promise, so I\u2019ll go back and reassure him that you\u2019re getting the goods.\u201d\u00a0 Adam gave Hoss a smug smile.\u00a0 \u201cBesides, I\u2019m still recuperating.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, dadburnit, if you ain\u2019t just the most cantankerous brother.\u00a0 I thought it was Joe but now I ain\u2019t so sure, uh-uh.\u201d<\/p>\n

They hitched the team to the wagon, and Adam finished putting boxes in the back while Hoss saddled Adam\u2019s horse, something he taken to doing while Adam was recovering from the gripe.\u00a0 Adam figured it only right because Hoss gave it to him.\u00a0 \u201cHey, Adam, do you think that Kudwa is right about a bad winter this year?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, he\u2019s not a medicine man of the Paiutes for nothing, Hoss.\u00a0 I mean, he\u2019s been dead on in pretty much all his predictions.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAh.\u00a0 How\u2019s he do it, you reckon?\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam jumped into his horse\u2019s saddle as Hoss clambered up into the wagon.\u00a0 \u201cYou know, you could move more quickly if you lost ten pounds.\u201d\u00a0 He laughed at Hoss\u2019s scrunched up attempt at an angry face.\u00a0 \u201cKudwa tried explaining to me but I\u2019m not that up on my Paiute.\u00a0 His tribe puts great faith in him, though.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, well, I wish you hadn\u2019t told Hop Sing.\u00a0 Made him downright jumpy.\u201d\u00a0 Hoss flicked the wagon reins and they headed out.\u00a0 \u201cCome to think of it, I ain\u2019t much happy about it myself.\u201d<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

As sunset settled around the ranch house Hop Sing paced impatiently.\u00a0 Ben never saw him so worried about a load of supplies before.\u00a0 Ben and Joe kept exchanging looks but not words while eating.\u00a0 They knew they couldn\u2019t possibly get as riled as Hop Sing was.<\/p>\n

Finally Ben grunted.\u00a0 \u201cHop Sing, why don\u2019t you sit and have a bite?\u00a0 No sense it all going to waste.\u201d<\/p>\n

Grumbling maniacally and tossing food onto a plate, and sometimes missing\u2014though Joe dared not giggle\u2014Hop Sing sat at Adam\u2019s plate and dug in.\u00a0 He ate meticulously but furiously, with this break of routine causing only half of his discomfiture.\u00a0 \u201cThey plomise supplies today. \u00a0They late.\u00a0 They gettee stranded.\u00a0 We starve.\u00a0 Best to eat now.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben cleared his throat. \u201cI\u2019ve never known Adam or Hoss to let you down, Hop Sing, but it\u2019s true we\u2019ve had a bad time of it so late in the year.\u00a0 I hope—.\u201d<\/p>\n

They heard the clattering of wheels outside and all ran out, Hop Sing in the lead.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Ben forced his youngest to go back up to bed to save his strength for the inevitable horse soup.\u00a0 He fought the memories of how they got into this fix but memories kept returning until finally he took total blame.\u00a0 That had been their last chance to get the supplies before the snows arrived.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t blame his sons for the failure\u2014he couldn\u2019t.\u00a0 It was more like the stars had been against them this year, the stars he’d been thanking every year since he took Adam west so many years before.\u00a0 If he hadn\u2019t been so distracted with the books, dwelling on the possibility of selling some of the land to come out after this year\u2019s thefts, he would have gone for the supplies himself.\u00a0 All his fault.\u00a0\u00a0Next year, Dear Lord, we\u2019ll lodge for two months in the valley, just let us live.\u00a0 Next year we\u2019ll build us a winter lodge in the valley to keep an eye on our stock ourselves.\u00a0 Please don\u2019t take my sons.<\/em><\/p>\n

Adam and Hoss had managed to catch the cattle thieves, running into them almost by accident, but then, in an odd turnabout, the cattle thieves caught them.\u00a0 They had their mind on supplies and not capture, anyway, Adam explained, and before they knew it they were tied in their wagon and their horses stolen.\u00a0 Fortunately this had happened only a couple miles from home so when finally they were able to free themselves, they pulled the wagon themselves all the way back, able to follow the wagon tracks already made in the snow.\u00a0 They were both exhausted and starved and made short work of whatever food was left.\u00a0 They nearly left the wagon behind several times, but knew that if they were going to get supplies they couldn\u2019t chance the thieves returning and taking the only wagon big enough for the purpose.<\/p>\n

And now where was Hop Sing?\u00a0 Out killing himself to give them some kind of hope.<\/p>\n

The boys had promised an immediate trip to town the following morning, but the household awoke to find the house buried by five feet of snow.\u00a0 Silent killer, that\u2019s what snow was.\u00a0 Only then did Ben learn why Hop Sing had been so frantic for supplies.\u00a0 He knew the snow was coming, and he knew their supply was only enough for a couple months, at most.<\/p>\n

That couple months was gone.<\/p>\n

And now, what cattle thieves and gold robbers and other cutthroats couldn\u2019t do to him and his boys, snow could.\u00a0 Like the Donners eight years before, they were trapped, and only family members left to eat\u2014their horses.\u00a0 Adam\u2019s horse had found its way back home, only to die and give them another few days of food.\u00a0 Could he do what the Donners did and eat a son who\u2019d died?\u00a0 No, he would die himself, instead.<\/p>\n

Ben thought he heard that noise again and struggled to his feet, knowing every exertion brought him closer to death.\u00a0 He jerked open the front door as though hoping to see sudden spring.\u00a0\u00a0 “Hop Sing!”\u00a0 His voice had lost its boom but carried a short distance anyway in the cold thin air.\u00a0 “You out there?”<\/p>\n

The horses had enough hay but he could hear them stomping against their corrals, wanting exercise.\u00a0 Ben picked up the rifle he\u2019d stood beside the door.\u00a0 Buck had to be first.\u00a0 His horse.\u00a0 He looked up into the sun, seemingly a universe away but it still brought a sparkle to the snow-capped trees.\u00a0 In years passed he’d always enjoyed how quiet the world of Lake Tahoe became in the winter, how clean and brilliant everything felt, even the air as he breathed it in.\u00a0 Now his breathing had become shallow, and the white world surrounding the brilliant lake was nothing short of hideous.\u00a0 Could he kill Buck and eat him?\u00a0 Could he do that to save his sons?\u00a0 Maybe he could let Buck loose, let him break a leg first trying to run through the snow.<\/p>\n

But Buck wouldn\u2019t run.\u00a0 He trusted Ben too much.<\/p>\n

“Hop Sing?”\u00a0 Someone was out there, beyond the bunkhouse.\u00a0 Or in the bunkhouse.\u00a0 Ben forced himself through the snow path to the bunkhouse and opened the door, at first unable to get it open because something had fallen, blocking the door.\u00a0 He could see a hand, and then a head\u2026\u201dHop Sing!\u201d<\/p>\n

Finally the door opened enough for him to step in.\u00a0 Not Hop Sing but a man he’d never seen before lay there, his mouth opening and shutting as he saw the big man leaning over him.\u00a0 “Help\u2026please\u2026” but then his eyes froze as he breathed his last.<\/p>\n

Not knowing how to deal with a dead man in the frozen winter, Ben backed away toward the house.\u00a0 A man\u2026dead\u2026as soon his sons would be\u2026<\/p>\n

Inside the house Ben fell into the settee and his eyes closed.\u00a0 He could not say later if it had been a dream or a memory, but he felt immersed in the rescue of the Donners, stranded in the Sierras on their way to California in 1846, not long after he first moved to Nevada from California. \u00a0These poor folks on a wagon train had taken a new, supposedly shorter route but got a late start.\u00a0 Stranded in the snow, their supplies ran out.\u00a0 By the time Ben and a number of others arrived to rescue them in early 1847, they found the survivors surrounded by human skeletons, bones stripped clean.<\/p>\n

As the story evolved, at first they ate only those who died naturally, and then, when that wasn’t enough, some began to kill\u2026they began to kill each other for food.[5]<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

“Pa.\u00a0 Pa, you okay?”<\/p>\n

Ben opened his eyes to see Adam staring down at him, his once handsome son now skeletal and listless.\u00a0 “What’s\u2026wrong\u2026”\u00a0 One of his sons, had one of them died?<\/p>\n

“You were screaming, Pa, about having to eat Hop Sing.”<\/p>\n

“Oh.\u00a0 Sorry, just a bad dream.”<\/p>\n

“Must have been remembering the Donners, eh?\u00a0 I’ll never forget you telling me about it.\u00a0 We’ll be okay, Pa.”\u00a0 Adam swayed and then grabbed the wall for support.<\/p>\n

“How, Adam?”\u00a0 His eldest, skin pale and dry, had only barely recovered from illness before they had to go on starvation rations.\u00a0 How was he surviving?<\/p>\n

“Pa, where’s Hop Sing?\u00a0 Did he come back?\u00a0 Is he dead?”<\/p>\n

“No, I haven’t seen him, but there’s a \u2026 a strange man in the bunkhouse, dead.\u00a0 Cold as an icebox out there.\u00a0 Probably\u2026keep there till spring.”<\/p>\n

Adam bit his lip to keep it from trembling.\u00a0 “Dead?”\u00a0 He dragged himself upright.\u00a0 “I might know him.”\u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0He grabbed the coat Ben had worn moments ago.<\/p>\n

It seemed to take his boy forever to return.\u00a0 As Ben felt his heart fill his chest with the hard-beating pain of worry and without any energy to rescue him, Adam came back inside.<\/p>\n

“Pa, that’s one of the cattle thieves.\u00a0 One of the ones that got us in this fix.\u00a0 Pa, Hoss is bad off.\u00a0 He’s gotta have food.”<\/p>\n

“We all do, son.”\u00a0 Ben struggled to his feet.\u00a0 “I’ll\u2026shoot Buck.”<\/p>\n

“No!\u00a0 Pa, if the Donners can do it, we can.”<\/p>\n

“What?”\u00a0 Ben found he wasn’t as shocked as he should have been.\u00a0 “Adam, you can’t be serious.”<\/p>\n

“It’ll buy us some time until Hop Sing gets back.\u00a0 Pa, we don’t have to tell Hoss what he’s eating, he’ll never know.\u00a0 We’ll use a lot of spice.”<\/p>\n

“No, Adam.\u00a0 I couldn’t.”\u00a0 Ben tried to picture himself carving some meat off that man out there.\u00a0 “I just couldn’t.”<\/p>\n

\u201cBut you can eat our horses?\u00a0 I\u2019d rather eat the guy that did this to us.”\u00a0 Adam shook his head.\u00a0 He grabbed the settee to stand and face the stairs, his entire body slouched.\u00a0 “I can’t even take those stairs.\u00a0 I’m going into the guest room and Pa\u2026I won’t be back out.”<\/p>\n

Ben watched Adam disappear.\u00a0 Can\u2019t be serious.\u00a0 Adam wasn\u2019t beyond saying something startling to get Ben to move.\u00a0 He concentrated\u2014hard to think with his head hurting.\u00a0 He had talked to one of the Donners\u2014the name escaped him\u2014and asked how he could live with himself.\u00a0\u00a0 At first the man, who seemed double Ben\u2019s age, only shook his head.\u00a0 But after thinking about it, he said, “I never killed anyone in my life, and never will.\u00a0 But not eating the meat the Lord provides, in whatever form, is also like committing murder, by letting others starve. Yeah.\u00a0 I live with it.\u00a0 Because I am able to.”<\/p>\n

Ben had to admit it that a dead man was easier to butcher than a live horse.\u00a0 He used the walls for support and got into the kitchen for Hop Sing\u2019s biggest butcher’s knife and a clean bucket.\u00a0 He put on the warm coat and hat and stepped outside.\u00a0 Why couldn’t a cow have found its way into the yard before dying?<\/p>\n

He forced cows into his head, until all he could see was cows, even as he stepped into the bunkhouse.\u00a0 Ben knelt and forced all thought away except of cows as he unbuttoned the man’s coat.\u00a0 Arms, legs, neck, chest, where to begin?\u00a0 Ben kept undressing the cow until he found the source of the best fat.\u00a0 He grabbed the frozen flesh in his hand, pictured his sons whole and healthy again, and after a look through the open door at the whiteness of the outside world, began to hack at the meat.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Ben ate several scoops of the stew to make sure it was edible.\u00a0 He nearly gagged on the taste in his mouth, but then his body accepted the nourishment and he found himself feeling stronger.\u00a0 He tried to bring some to Adam but found the guest room empty, and then heard the brief sound of laughter coming from upstairs.<\/p>\n

Ben, bowl and three forks in hand, stepped into Hoss’s room to see Joe and Adam each holding one of Hoss’s hands as they talked.\u00a0 Hoss sat up in bed but he was pale, skin lying in folds about his face and neck, eyes black and listless.\u00a0 He looked up at the smell of food, and opened his mouth as though to talk but nothing came out.\u00a0 Ben put the stew on his lap.<\/p>\n

“Dig in, boys.\u00a0 Hop Sing found and cooked\u2026some sort of animal.”<\/p>\n

By the expression on the faces of first Adam and then Joe, Ben knew Adam must have told Joe about the dead man.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah,\u201d Joe said to Hoss, a little louder than he needed to.\u00a0 \u201cSome animal kind of wandered into the yard and died.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, like one of our cows,\u201d Adam said, perking up a bit with a kind of vague and unrealistic hope.<\/p>\n

\u201cOr a chicken,\u201d Joe added.<\/p>\n

\u201cHell, I\u2019d even eat that cattle thief right now,\u201d Hoss managed to whisper as he ate slowly at first, and then with more vigor as he realized this really was food and not an illusion.<\/p>\n

Adam and Joe covered their eyes and swallowed hard before looking back at Hoss.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019d even eat you if you died right now, you skinny thing,\u201d Adam said.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, we got a new name for you, Hoss, we\u2019re gonna call you Little Hoss!\u201d\u00a0 And Joe laughed a moment and then, dizzy, laid back against the bed post.<\/p>\n

Ben pointed to the two extra forks.\u00a0 “Adam, Joe, you need to eat, too.”<\/p>\n

They hesitated.\u00a0 “Well, what about you, Pa?” Adam asked.<\/p>\n

“I’ve had my share already.\u00a0 You\u2019ll find you can only eat a little, at first.”\u00a0 Ben swallowed hard at the sudden thick wetness in his throat.\u00a0 \u201cHard to get your appetite back.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe picked up a fork, and after a moment, Adam took hold of his.\u00a0 Adam watched as Joe scooped up a forkful and put it to his lips.\u00a0 “Smells okay, Adam.”<\/p>\n

“Tastes great, Joe, what you worried about?”\u00a0 Hoss looked from Joe to his Pa, and then down at the food again.\u00a0 “Hey, what is this stuff?”<\/p>\n

As if on cue Hop Sing burst into the room with another helping of stew.\u00a0 “This I findee wandering. \u00a0You like elk, Hoss?\u00a0 You Joe?\u00a0 Adam, elk is always favlite.\u00a0 Hop Sing know ways to make it last.\u00a0 Then find way down mountain to valley for supplies.”<\/p>\n

Ben laughed when he saw the expression on Adam and Joe’s faces.\u00a0 “What did you boys think we were eating\u2014Hop Sing?”\u00a0 Ben grabbed the extra bowl that Hop Sing brought and as Hoss ate with a savoring appreciation of every mouthful, the four gathered around the bed and joined him.\u00a0 Slowly, small mouthfuls at a time, all savoring and the room filled with the merry tunes of mmmmmmm.<\/p>\n

“Hop Sing,” Hoss said, for once not getting scolded for talking with his mouth full, “you are just plain plum magical.”<\/p>\n

Hop Sing nodded and laughed.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

When they seemed satisfied, Hop Sing took the bowl and silverware back downstairs.\u00a0 Listening to their happy conversation above him, Hop Sing snuck back outside to make sure the other dead cattle thief and his sleigh were well hid.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

[1] See Oliver Knight,\u00a0Following the Indian Wars: the story of the Newspaper correspondents among the Indian Campaigners (<\/em>Norman: University of Oklahoma Press, 1960), 267.\u00a0 John F. Finerty,\u00a0War Path and Bivouac\u00a0<\/em>(Norman: University of Oklahoma, 1961, originally published 1890), 184; from Lt. Lawson on the Starvation March under General Crook in 1876, \u201cWhen it comes to eating a horse, I\u2019d as soon think of eating my brother!\u201d<\/p>\n

[2] By the middle of December, snow around Tahoe is on average 15 feet deep. \u00a0\u00a0Average annual snowfall is 18 feet.\u00a0 Information from the \u201cLake Tahoe \u2013 Facts and Figures\u201d given out at the 2005 Convention.\u00a0 The January average temperature is 36 \u2013 but for this particular winter, I have it at just under freezing until mid-January, or right around the time they start to starve.<\/p>\n

[3] Gerhard Luhn wrote his wife on September 10, 1876, proud at how long he could hold out on Crook\u2019s starvation march without eating a horse.\u00a0 \u201cThe Big Horn and Yellowstone Expedition of 1876\u201d,<\/em>\u00a0Annals of Wyoming,\u00a0<\/em>44.<\/p>\n

[4] Carson City was founded as a community in 1858, seven years after the establishment of the Eagle Station Trading Post in 1851.\u00a0 http:\/\/www.carson-city.nv.us\/aboutcarson\/history\/1.htm . \u00a0Truckee Post is creative license.<\/p>\n

[5] See more on the history of the Donner Party at http:\/\/www.donnerpartydiary.com\/.<\/p>\n

Disclaimer:\u00a0All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

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<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Summary:\u00a0 A rare story of how the Cartwrights survived one particularly bad winter.<\/p>\n

Rated:\u00a0MA\u00a0 (5,510 words)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":193,"featured_media":12434,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"template-full-width-post.php","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1016,23,690],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6450","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-adam-pa","category-drama","category-ma-rated","wpcat-1016-id","wpcat-23-id","wpcat-690-id"],"a3_pvc":{"activated":true,"total_views":2151,"today_views":2},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/01\/Lake-Tahoe-Winter-2.jpg?fit=1600%2C1200&ssl=1","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":12120,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=12120","url_meta":{"origin":6450,"position":0},"title":"Blundered Seduction (by DebbieB)","author":"DebbieB","date":"December 1, 2003","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary:\u00a0 Caught with his pants down and in a compromising situation by the one person he'd least likely want to find him as such, Joe learns three valuable lessons; no one ever died of embarrassment, chose your friends carefully, and being 16 and still a virgin is nothing to be\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Drama"","block_context":{"text":"Drama","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=23"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":13630,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=13630","url_meta":{"origin":6450,"position":1},"title":"A Cry for Freedom (by JennieA)","author":"JennieA","date":"January 7, 2003","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary:\u00a0 It started with Ben giving Little Joe more responsibility for the Ponderosa.\u00a0 Little did the family realize the course Ben was setting in motion. 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Any reader wishing to read this series should e:mail the Brandsters:\u00a0 Brandsters2020@gmail.com","rel":"","context":"In "Drama"","block_context":{"text":"Drama","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=23"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/Joe-copy-7.jpg?fit=594%2C592&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/Joe-copy-7.jpg?fit=594%2C592&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/Joe-copy-7.jpg?fit=594%2C592&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":12133,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=12133","url_meta":{"origin":6450,"position":5},"title":"Frightened Beyond Reason (by DebbieB)","author":"DebbieB","date":"June 1, 2002","format":false,"excerpt":"DebbieB passed away Christmas 2021. 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