{"id":6463,"date":"2014-05-04T10:46:43","date_gmt":"2014-05-04T14:46:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=6463"},"modified":"2025-02-18T19:12:27","modified_gmt":"2025-02-19T00:12:27","slug":"the-worst-of-consequences","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=6463","title":{"rendered":"It’s Only a Year – The Worst of Consequences – A Lesson in Choice #3 (by MissJudy)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Summary: \u00a0<\/span>17 year old Adam has\u00a0proven himself to the Ponderosa ranch hands after a summer of hazing, and is finally enjoying his\u00a0his last year home\u00a0before leaving for school. But his life takes a dramatic turn when he is menaced by a new addition to the crew,\u00a0and\u00a0must decide whether the man is serious in his\u00a0sinister\u00a0intent, or it’s just\u00a0another\u00a0attempt to test his mettle.\u00a0Once Adam decides\u00a0which it is, he\u00a0makes choices that\u00a0 bring him into conflict with his father and lead to the worst of consequences.<\/p>\n

Rated:<\/span>\u00a0K+ \u00a0WC \u00a016,000<\/span><\/p>\n

It’s Only a Year Series:<\/strong><\/p>\n

It’s Only a Year – He Said What? – Lessons in Understanding <\/a>
\nIt’s Only a Year – The Caster Oil Caper – Lessons in Humility<\/a>
\nIt’s Only a Year – The Worst of Consequences – A Lesson in Choice<\/a>
\nIt’s Only a Year –\u00a0 The Quiet of Uncertainty – A Lesson in Hope<\/a>
\nIt’s Only a Year – The Final Trial – A Lesson in Mettle<\/a><\/p>\n

Story Notes:<\/b><\/em><\/p>\n

This is the third segment of the\u00a0It’s Just a Year\u00a0series but can be read independently.<\/em><\/p>\n

As this story opens, Adam is six months into his final year at home, and things are looking up. The hazing from the crew has eased, his brothers are being nice since almost poisoning him and he’s earned the respect of his father and their ranch foreman. However, things are about to change….<\/em><\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

The Worst of Consequences \u2013 A Lesson in Choices<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hoss flipped the pitchfork over in his calloused hands and slid the pole end down the back of his long-john shirt to scratch his back. \u201cI don\u2019t know about you, Adam, but I\u2019ve had it with this hay! There ain\u2019t an inch of me that ain\u2019t itching, and I can truthfully say this is one day I\u2019d rather be with Miss Jones than workin\u2019 at home.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Up on the wagon, his older brother gave a snort of agreement as he rubbed his own back against the rough wood of the seat while moving the team ahead to the next pile of dried grass. \u201cBut we\u2019re almost done now and then we can head home and get a change of clothes. That sounds pretty good, doesn\u2019t it?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hoss\u2019 agreement was swallowed by a shrill scream, followed by a splashing sound coming from the edge of the field. The two brothers uttered the same name in frustration: \u201cJoe.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***<\/strong><\/p>\n

After the two youngest Cartwrights had unwittingly poisoned their brother with a dose of castor oil, they\u2019d held their breath in hopes that he would recover fully, and for a couple of weeks the eldest only had to clear his throat at their willful behavior to remind them of their vows to behave better and cooperate. But that time of grace had worn out as they\u2019d realized that he was looking much healthier.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Summer for Adam had continued on with hard work, trips out to the camp, and refereeing his younger brothers, but the increasing arc of the sun\u2019s path made Adam realize he had a little more than a half a year until he\u2019d \u00a0be leaving for Boston with Professor Metz. Each passing month brought growing excitement, yet amplified his anxiety as he realized how little time he\u2019d been able to study. He kept a check on his fear by reasoning that with winter on the way, he\u2019d have ample time to get back into intensive review and be ready to go come spring. However days were still warm, and there was much to get done before he could turn his thoughts to studying.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

His father had been correct about a number of things: the Ponderosa was attracting men that were hiring on and that had lessened Adam\u2019s need to offer relief at camp. The extra time allowed him to learn more about the business side of the ranch\u2014figuring out where to move the herd for optimal grazing, helping to select the stock to be sold, and keeping the household going while Ben was away. He still rode out with the men when they moved cattle from one area to the next, but that too had become a more pleasant task since the crew was no longer hazing him as they had done throughout the summer. They\u2019d found new opportunities with the fresh hires, but as he\u2019d promised his father, he\u2019d put more effort into joining the men instead of going off by himself to read in the evenings, and they\u2019d made him one of their own as they got to know him better. Now he joined in their talks and singing, finding that the men enjoyed his voice and the way he pulled together extra stanzas for the old ballads they sang that incorporated their names and feats of bravery or trickery. Adam had to admit that he\u2019d grown to enjoy those times very much.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Their foreman, Hugh, had begun to accept his opinions and trust his judgments, even though he still called him \u201cYoung Cartwright.\u201d This was the name he went by in camp and the some of the newer hires mistakenly thought his first name was actually, \u201cYoung.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam had been upset at first when he\u2019d had to remain home for a year longer than planned and had faced some uphill battles, yet he had to admit that the Ponderosa had come a long way in six months, and he had come a long way with it\u2014just as his father had predicted.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

There were two major tasks to finish before the days got too short and the air cooled for fall: the herd needed be moved a final time into the higher country for grazing before being brought back down for the winter, and there was hay to be cut and brought in.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Moving the herd was still several days off, but Adam had had started on the hay the previous weekend when he and Hoss had scythed, and he\u2019d returned to that field during the week to flip the cuttings allowing the grass to dry evenly. Putting up wet hay was one of his father\u2019s biggest fears and Adam knew that he\u2019d be asked as soon as the man returned, \u201cYou sure that grass was dry? You know we don\u2019t want it molding or starting a fire.\u201d Of course Adam did \u201cknow,\u201d and after testing several areas of the large field, had declared it was ready.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hoss was excited to help\u2026at first anyway\u2026before the day became long and itchy because it meant he didn\u2019t have to attend classes. There wasn\u2019t a Virginia City school, but a young woman and her mother had moved to the area and taught a number of children privately. It was normal for her class to be short a few or even all of her students on any given day in the spring and fall as they were needed at home to help with seasonal chores. She didn\u2019t like that they weren\u2019t in class, but sent work home, and Adam was usually the one who\u2019d go over Hoss and Joe\u2019s assignments when they were unable to make it into town.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The day of haying had begun with Adam going over the boys lessons until the sun had dried what little dew had settled during the night, and had stretched on as they\u2019d moved several loads of hay with what Adam figured was one left to gather and store before they were done. The one part of the operation that proved to be a continuous annoyance was Little Joe. Since Hoss didn\u2019t go to school, Joe couldn\u2019t go on his own and while he usually stayed home with Pa or Hop Sing on days like this, their pa was out in the high country with timber buyers, and the cook was away too, so Joe was with his brothers. The child could be involved in an activity that kept him away from the danger of what his brothers were doing one minute, and then found hiding under a pile of hay the next, keeping the brothers on guard as they gently inserted their pitchforks into the piles\u2014not wanting to impale him. They also had to remain constantly vigil to make sure he wasn\u2019t hiding under the wagon. It had become monotonous and then plainly irksome, with tempers shortening in proportion to the amount of daylight left to finish their job.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Against his better judgment, Adam had finally sent Little Joe out of the field to play near a stream, figuring they\u2019d finish more quickly without him in close proximity. The stream was shallow and filled with frogs, so the brothers expected that Joe would stay busy and safe until they were done. It seemed a sound decision as the work progressed more quickly\u2026until Adam and Hoss heard the shrieks and had to abandon their labors to see what was causing the to-do.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

They found the child struggling to get upright in the only deep well of the stream, coughing out the water he\u2019d inhaled, while holding onto the biggest bullfrog they\u2019d ever seen. When clothed with a full set of long-johns, thick-fabric pants and an oversized hand-me-down flannel shirt, the boy looked substantial, but standing there wet to the skin, it was obvious how scrawny he actually was. He was certainly healthy though, and his diminutive frame didn\u2019t indicate a deficiency in the size of his personality, but Adam chilled with fear as he realized the sun\u2019s position indicated that the day would be ending quickly and his brother was soaked and shivering. Since they figured they\u2019d be done well before sunset, they hadn\u2019t brought anything but necessities, which meant no blanket or even jackets, and his mind began to race as he thought about how to get his brother dried off and warm. He yelled for Hoss to bring the wagon over while he lifted Little Joe onto dry land and began to strip the wet clothing.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019d you go and do that for?\u201d Adam admonished as he grappled with the buttonholes that had become tight when the fabric had shrunk with wetness.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cIt was the biggest frog I ever seen, Adam. I grabbed at him and got him, but that rock was wet and I just sorta slipped in.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cJust sort\u2019a slipped in, huh? What if that hole had been deeper? What if you\u2019d hit your head when you fell in or what if we hadn\u2019t heard you yelping? Things would have ended a whole lot differently then. Why can\u2019t you think a little harder about the things you do\u00a0before<\/em>\u00a0doing them?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The child did not back down. \u201cI just wanted to catch that frog and I did. How was I to know what all\u00a0might<\/em>\u00a0happen.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hoss returned, bringing along the only thing from the wagon of value to the situation\u2014the tablecloth Hop Sing had included in their food basket. Adam grabbed it and dried the child off, rubbing his skin to restore some warmth and circulation. But once he finished, Joe stood there with nothing but a wet cloth wrapped around his bony shoulders and started shivering again. Adam looked to Hoss, who understood what to do with nary a word being spoken. Each older boy unbuttoned their own outer shirt and laid it around the child, encapsulating him from neck to toes in a double layer of flannel.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hoss expressed his fears, \u201cNow how do we get him home without him freezing, Adam? It\u2019s getting cooler out here by the minute with the sun goin\u2019 down. We\u2019re a good distance from the house and it\u2019s gonna\u2019 take longer totin\u2019 that load a hay.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWe get him buried under some of this hay, is how.\u201d Adam began to clear a hollow in the mound of grass, just behind the wagon\u2019s seat. \u201cIt\u2019s warm from the sun and will act like a kind of like a grass blanket.\u201d He tried to keep his voice calm so his middle brother wouldn\u2019t worry and Joe wouldn\u2019t start carrying on. So far, it was working.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

After a snug den was opened up, Hoss lifted Joe up for Adam, who grabbed him and tucked him beneath the grass. To his relief, the idea seemed to work as well as he had hoped it might and Joe settled in for the ride home. Adam also hoped that the warmth and wagon movement would lull his brother into sleep, but he should have known better. The boy ran full-out all day until he collapsed in sleep at bedtime. Joe had stopped napping when he was just a year old and was filled with so much energy he could sap a person\u2019s strength just watching him as he flew from one activity to the next.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

After listening to a constant barrage of thoughts from the youngster and the oft asked question of, \u201cAre we almost home, Adam?\u201d \u00a0he snapped at the boy, telling him to \u201chush,\u201d and much to his relief, Hoss took up the conversation, leaving his older brother to drive the team and drift into thoughts of other problems he\u2019d been facing recently.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Although his camp visits had become far more pleasant, his last two trips out there had left him puzzled and wary. Hugh had hired on a drifter from Texas that had shown up in camp looking for work. Adam remembered seeing him when he\u2019d gone out there a month or so back, figuring him to be in his twenties. He went by the name, Randall, though whether that was a first name or last no one knew, and since Randall kept to himself, the others weren\u2019t certain he\u2019d say what his full name was even if they did ask.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

What Adam noted immediately was that his eyes were always moving: darting from man to man until he seemed to have accounted for all of them, and then would start back at the beginning, repeating the process. He\u2019d watch furtively if anyone left the group and Adam was certain the man had always moved to make sure his back was never to anyone. It hadn\u2019t meant much to Young Cartwright since most of the hired men were loners brought together for moving steers, and when that job was over or they tired of their locale, they drifted on again, sure to find work somewhere along the trail of new towns popping up along supply roads and mining areas. He assumed that if Hugh vouched for the new man, he was a suitable addition.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

But he\u2019d soon been forced to wonder what kind of man this Randall really was. Adam had been riding the right flank of the herd when the new man had ridden in close enough to speak.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cSo you\u2019re Papa\u2019s little boy,\u201d he\u2019d opened snidely.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cIf you\u2019re saying I\u2019m Ben Cartwright\u2019s son, then yes, I am.\u201d He\u2019d tried to keep an even tone to his answer, hoping the man was simply teasing.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI thought you\u2019d be bigger somehow. The men in camp talk about you like you\u2019re somethin\u2019 special, but you ain\u2019t; not that I can see anyways. You\u2019re just a scrawny kid with a big head.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam had nudged his horse ahead without comment, figuring it best to ignore the man, but Randall had followed while keeping up the taunting.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThey say you\u2019s smart too, but I can\u2019t see that neither. You don\u2019t look smarter than anyone else out here. What you got to say to that, Cartwright?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019d say that perhaps you should get to know me before making any further judgments.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cHa!\u201d he\u2019d howled eerily. \u201cAin\u2019t that just the prettiest way of telling me I should mind my own business? You must think you\u2019re some real la-di-da. With that rich pa, you figure you can tell the rest of us what to do.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam had never met anyone as cantankerous or eager for a fight as Randall seemed, and reasoned that he needed to get out of this situation before it went any further. \u201cWell, if that\u2019s how you feel, there\u2019s not much I can say to convince you otherwise. Why don\u2019t you fall back to your position while I take care of mine.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Randall gave an ugly laugh. \u201cWell there boy, you just proved my point. I barely met you and you\u2019re already telling me what to do. But I guess I should have expected that from the owner\u2019s son who lords it over everyone that he\u2019s going to some uppity school out East. Too smart for the rest of us yokels, right boy?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

He hadn\u2019t meant to let himself be baited, but he had, and Adam had swung around in his saddle to look directly into the accuser\u2019s eyes. \u201cYou don\u2019t know me, and you\u2019re making some mighty big assumptions from a few odd comments you probably heard in camp. Yes, I\u2019m the owner\u2019s son and I\u2019m planning to go to school. I don\u2019t expect that anyone else want the same thing nor do I care what you think of me. Do your job, I\u2019ll do mine and we\u2019ll get along fine.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cOh my, did I offend you?\u201d His voice had taken on a barb that could have cut to the bone. \u201cI\u2019ll stay away from you, mister high-and-mighty. But don\u2019t think I\u2019m through with you. I know your kind. You think you\u2019re so much better than me: but we\u2019ll see who\u2019s better. I\u2019ll wipe that smug look right off your face one day; you can count on that.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam had spurred his horse to ride away, while Randall called after him, \u201cWhy don\u2019t you wear a gun, boy? Better get one. You\u2019re gonna need it before I\u2019m done with you.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The whole conversation had only lasted a minute or two, yet had shaken Adam to the core. He couldn\u2019t understand what he\u2019d done to move the man to such ugliness and was more than glad to head home the next day when they finished moving the herd. He\u2019d finally decided he\u2019d just keep his distance and maybe whatever it was that was goading the man would ease up.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s attention was drawn back to his brothers who were playing a game where one would describe something they saw and the other had to guess what it was. Joe\u2019s current description was obviously the setting sun, but instead of saying he saw a big orange circle in the sky, he was well into his third paragraph of information and Hoss was sitting there with a look of brotherly patience\u2026and cluelessness. The trip that normally took 20 minutes was stretching on much longer as Adam tried to keep the hay from juggling off center or sliding off the back. They were nearing the house now, but there was still enough time for him to recall his second meeting with Randall late last week.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

He\u2019d gone out to discuss the next move with Hugh and was relieved to see that most of the men were out riding watch. After agreeing on what needed to be done, he\u2019d broached the subject of Randall with the foreman.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cSo what do you think of the new man?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cGood wrangler, but gives me the same feeling you get when you\u2019ve found the perfect bush to hide behind to answer nature\u2019s call and pull your pants down around your ankles, only to hear a diamond back shakin\u2019 its tail just a few feet in front of you. You know how it is: you go about your business real careful like, without upsetting the snake any more than it already is, and finally back away\u2014never taking your eyes off it.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam laughed heartily while clapping his foreman on the back. \u201cI couldn\u2019t have said that any better, Hugh! You have a way of putting things into perfect perspective.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hugh\u2019s eyebrows knit in concern. \u201cHe giving you trouble?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cNah, not really. I\u2019ve only met him the one time, but that was enough to make me wary\u2014like you described: I felt like I was caught with my pants down and some very sharp, poisonous fangs nearby just itching to strike. It\u2019s nothing serious, just that he seems to be spoiling for some sort of confrontation and I have no idea why.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s exactly what he\u2019s like. He doesn\u2019t talk much to anyone out here except to express his displeasure. Wasn\u2019t like that right off, but he seems to be growing mean as he\u2019s around longer. I\u2019m gonna cut him loose, but I got John home with his sick wife, and Frank laid up with a bum ankle after losing a fight to a pile of loose rocks. Soon as one of them is back, I\u2019ll send Randall packing. We don\u2019t need a herald of gloom out here, that\u2019s for sure.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

They\u2019d talked a little more about the plans for the move, with Hugh in full agreement that taking the herd up farther to graze for a while to fatten them up and then bringing back to a canyon nearer the ranch toward winter would work best. Adam had promised he\u2019d return for the move and had mounted up for home.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hugh had reached for the bridle on Adam\u2019s horse, locking on the young man with a look that expressed his concern. \u201cBe careful with Randall, Adam. Of all the things strange about that man, what bothers me the most is his absolute hate for you Cartwrights. I ain\u2019t even got an idea why. Your pa was out here shortly after he hired on, and I recall some of the other hands asked about you. I don\u2019t suppose you know it, but you Cartwrights wear each other on your sleeves. Your pa fairly beams when he talks about you and your brothers, and that day he mentioned something you was doing back home. Well, I\u2019m not sure that we didn\u2019t add to that as we talked about your family that night, because after that Randall just started mouthin\u2019 off about you all being snooty and uppity and how he\u2019d take you down to size. Didn\u2019t make any sense, but with folks like him, I guess it doesn\u2019t have to.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s pretty much what he said to me, Hugh. But I figure he\u2019s entitled to his opinion as long as he leaves me alone.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll get him outta here soon, but be careful until then. Tell your pa to be careful around him too.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hugh had let the horse go, swatting its backside as he went by and tipped his hat to Adam. \u201cSee you in a couple-a-weeks.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Barely out of sight of the camp, Adam had felt a chill brush his shoulders and turned to see a horse approaching. It was too late to pretend he hadn\u2019t seen him, so he\u2019d slowed to see what Randall wanted.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cHey, boy, I think we might\u2019a gotten off on the wrong foot last time we talked.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

While the man\u2019s words had spoken to an apology, the look on his face had been anything but meek. Adam had noted his small, beady eyes and wide, snaky grin and his mind went back to Hugh\u2019s earlier description. In an attempt to get the conversation over with and move on, he\u2019d simply offered, \u201cNo problem.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Randall\u2019s horse had seemed to sidle closer to Adam as the man had fixed his eyes on the youngster, ready to strike. \u201cI didn\u2019t say there was a problem, sonny, just that maybe I wasn\u2019t clear last time we talked.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam had tried to ride away while offering the excuse that he had to get home, but Randall had reached out, catching one of the horse\u2019s reins, yanking it hard; the poor animal\u2019s head jerking solidly to the left as it had given out a cry. \u201cStop that!\u201d Adam pulled at the rein but couldn\u2019t tear it from the wild-eyed man\u2019s hand.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s the matter, sonny? Am I keeping you from getting back to your cozy little house?\u201d Randall had sighed as the maniacal look on his faced had faded. \u201cLook, boy. I just wanted to tell you something.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not interested in anything you have to say.\u201d Adam had learned from his father how to exhibit a spine of steel even as his knees had knocked against his saddle with uncertainty.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019ll be interested in this. You said last time that goin\u2019 on to school was something you wanted to do. I can understand that and thought about it a lot since you been gone.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It was odd what passed through a person\u2019s mind as they faced terror. All Adam could think of at the time was that he thought Hugh had said the man had come from Texas, yet there was no Texan twang in the way he spoke. He would have placed the man as being from Ohio or somewhere in the central states rather than from the south. He had to concentrate again to hear what Randall was saying.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s something I want to do too. You wanna know what?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cNot really, but I\u2019m sure you\u2019re going to tell me.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The demon had returned for an instant as Randall had raised his hand as if to slap him. \u201cYou mouthy young bastard!\u201d he\u2019d cried out, but then his face and posture had relaxed to that snake-like grin again. \u201cI want to do one thing before I leave this area. I want to kill myself a Cartwright.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam had drawn his breath sharply; shocked that anyone would actually say something so vile to another. \u201cWhy do you want to do that?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

A dry, crackled laugh had accompanied the explanation. \u201cI told you, boy; it\u2019s a goal, just like you wantin\u2019 to go away from here. You have loftier ideas, but I think mine is just right for me.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat have I possibly done to make you hate me enough to kill me?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cAin\u2019t\u00a0you<\/em>\u00a0I hate so much. It\u2019s what you are, not what you done, see? You think you\u2019re better\u2019n me \u2018cause you got more: more money, more brains, more respect. You and your pa ride into camp and everyone pays you mind. It\u2019s just more\u2019n I can stand to watch; makes my stomach turn and gets a burnin\u2019 going in me I just got to quench somehow. Seeing one less of you Cartwrights would ease that pain a bit and make us a little more equal; all men are equal when they\u2019re dead, you know.\u201d Randall had snorted in pleased sort of way, \u201c Doesn\u2019t even matter which one of you Cartwrights I get, so I\u2019ll let you decide that, sonny. Next time I see you, you be wearing a gun or I\u2019ll go after your pa. It\u2019ll be fair. I\u2019ll give him a chance, but he\u2019s old: gotta be nearing 40 already and that makes a man slow down. He\u2019ll be thinking about you and those other whelps of his and he\u2019ll get outdrawn and outshot. Might work out best that way though. Then he\u2019d be gone, and you\u2019d have to raise them youngens instead a going away from here, so I guess I\u2019d take down two Cartwright with one bullet.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam had heard him cackling even after he\u2019d grabbed the rein sharply enough to free it, and rode away. He could hear that strange laughter even now as he drove the wagon toward home with his brothers. There was one other thought that came to mind as he remembered that day. Hugh had warned him to be careful, and had called him, \u201cAdam.\u201d The corner of his mouth turned up wryly as he thought about it, figuring Hugh must truly be concerned since it was the only time he had\u00a0ever<\/em>\u00a0called him by his actual name. Fact was Adam wasn\u2019t even sure that the man knew what it was until he heard him say it. It was Hugh who\u2019d originated the name \u201cYoung Cartwright\u201d so Adam was dead positive that Hugh knew there was trouble ahead and wanted to make sure he understood the danger.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hoss broke into his thoughts. \u201cHey, Adam, I done entertained Joe as much as I can, so how about you pitch in a little.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s answer sounded as though he was annoyed, but his thoughts had left him edgy and unsettled. \u201cWhat do you expect me to do?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hoss was not deterred. \u201cWell, maybe you could sing that song Joe likes so much. You know, that one about the woman who lets her true love die with no mind, but then gets to feel sadly about it?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cAh, you mean Barbara Allen. Sure, I can do that. Sorry I snapped at you just now.\u201d Adam knew both his brothers liked the song with its verses unfolding the unhappy story with the sweet ending. He\u2019d always stop at a point where Miss Allen was still feeling pretty sure of herself for spurning Sweet William and make them beg to hear the ending. There were several versions of the song, but Adam chose the one he\u2019d get through the fastest. His rich baritone carried on the wind as he began:<\/p>\n

\u201cIn Scarlet town where I was born
\nThere was a fair maid dwelling
\nAnd every youth cried well away
\nFor her name was Barbara Allen\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***<\/strong><\/p>\n

The timber negotiations hadn\u2019t gone well and Ben regretted the days away from home with no outcome. He\u2019d led the two mill men around his timber stands for days while they\u2019d surveyed and calculated, only to offer him a pittance. He\u2019d realized in frustration that they figured him some chawbacon\u2014a hayseed they could impress by disguising a miserable offer inside some fancy words and promises. But they\u2019d figured way wrong. Ben actually enjoyed a good negotiation and relished the give and take until a suitable price could be reached, but he had no tolerance for people who couldn\u2019t correctly size up who they were dealing with. He\u2019d escorted them from his land with a restrained threat regarding them ever returning.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben had been negotiating most of his adult life and while the product was different now, he always kept up on the going prices of what he was trading and never accepted the first offer. He\u2019d gotten the Ponderosa on its feet through his fur business and always asked the highest prices for his pelts. This land produced the best and he wasn\u2019t about to accept anything but the best for it. His success in fur trading had allowed him to purchase more grazing land to begin raising stock, and when acres of pinion and ponderosa pine became available, he\u2019d grabbed those hillsides up as well. His investment in breeding stock was beginning to pay off, so the timber could just keep on growing until the right offer came along. There was no hurry. The territory was just beginning to settle and the need for timber would only increase with time.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

He\u2019d headed to town before returning home hoping some of the farm implements he\u2019d ordered at Cass\u2019 store had arrived. They hadn\u2019t, but Will said he had something else for him.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cA large crate arrived here for Adam all the way from Boston.\u201d Will had wondered at the contents while commenting on how lovely it would be back East with fall coming on.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s probably those books the boy\u2019s been waiting for. I\u2019ll send him in tomorrow with a wagon.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Will Cass had been the first settler to come to Virginia City with enough gumption and money to start up a general store. He and Ben had hit it off from the beginning and Will was always agreeable to let the Ponderosa ride a little on their bills when money got tight. He\u2019d told Ben that he knew his spread would be the biggest in the territory someday and wasn\u2019t about to hinder that by demanding a few dollars now when there\u2019d be plenty later. Money still got tight now and then, but Ben had become Will\u2019s best customer and his biggest supporter. \u201cWhy not just take my wagon and someone can bring it back tomorrow,\u201d he\u2019d suggested. \u201cI don\u2019t have your tools yet, but I do have the order Hop Sing wanted, so you could get those supplies home along with the crate.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben agreed that it made sense and headed out, arriving home to an empty house. His initial disappointment was replaced with boyish excitement at having the place to himself for a few hours. He\u2019d noted the traces of hay in the yard as he\u2019d pulled in and figured the boys must be out in the field yet. With no one\u2026or thing needing immediate attention, he found something to eat and then sat in his chair, stretched his legs out onto the table in front of the hearth and nestled in for a quick nap before anyone came back and made that impossible.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

As he got comfortable, he looked around his house. The structure was only about six years old, but it was already too small. When he\u2019d gone to New Orleans with his final lot of pelts to sell before turning to ranching full time, he and his two sons had lived in a building that was little more than a lean-to with a door and window. It was small, but met their needs since they\u2019d spent much of their time camping out while running trap lines and had only needed a real shelter in the colder months. But he\u2019d come home with a good return on his labors, and a beautiful young wife, so had quickly built a larger house. Other outbuildings had followed, making the Ponderosa into a real homestead. They\u2019d brought a few of Marie\u2019s furnishings along with them, but many had been too nice to use in a house with youngsters who seldom saw the value of removing their boots or washing up. They\u2019d used her furniture in their bedroom and one of her blue velvet, high backed chairs in the sitting area, but the lovely red settee and leather chairs remained crated and covered in the barn.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

If he\u2019d had to put a name to the \u201cstyle\u201d of his home, he\u2019d call it utilitarian. Along with Marie\u2019s blue chair, they had one other comfortable piece that had been Elizabeth\u2019s and had come all the way with them from Boston. There was little more except a bench and several tables that he\u2019d made from their own pine. The house was built around a massive stone hearth at the center and had one large room on the lower floor with a small inset to separate the kitchen area. A narrow stairway lead up to three rooms on the second floor, a decision he\u2019d made to take advantage of the chimney\u2019s heat rather than putting everything on one level like most houses in the area. His room was the largest, if you could actually call it large, and the other two were cramped with only enough room for a bed and a few shelves for storage. He knew the house seemed smaller by the day as the boys continued to grow, and was much too small over the winter months when they were forced to spend long hours indoors. It wasn\u2019t fancy, but it was his and although he knew he\u2019d have to do something soon he was in no hurry to make changes. He was just satisfied that he\u2019d found his focus again and was making progress with the ranch situation while preparing for Adam\u2019s departure come next spring.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

He hadn\u2019t intended on letting his mind drift to that pending loss, but it did\u2014along with the thoughts of Marie. For his own good, he knew he couldn\u2019t linger there and chose instead to just recall the happier times when Marie had graced this home.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

In that state of mind, he\u2019d drifted off and wasn\u2019t sure how long he\u2019d actually been snoozing when he heard something that jarred him awake. Righting himself in the chair, he saw that the afternoon shadows were lengthening and surmised that what he\u2019d heard was the voices of his sons carrying on the wind as they returned home.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Although Ben knew it might not be fair to eavesdrop, it was a parental privilege he claimed from time to time. He\u2019d never listen at a closed door or when a conversation was clearly meant to be private, but taking note of their brotherly banter was always insightful, if not downright amusing at times. He\u2019d pulled the wagon to the far side of the house and knew the boys wouldn\u2019t see it there until they were well into the yard, so he had a few minutes before he\u2019d have to show himself.\u00a0 Moving to the door, he cracked it open just enough to hear better and smiled as he heard Adam singing\u2026<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***
\n\u201cThey buried her in the old churchyard
\nThey buried him in the choir
\nAnd from his grave grew a red red rose
\nFrom her grave a green briar
\nThey grew and grew to the steeple top
\nTill they could grow no higher
\nAnd there they twined in a true love’s knot
\nRed rose around green briar\u201d*<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cDo ya really think that two plants could grow like that, Adam?\u201d The question came from the child in the hay.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI suppose anything is possible, Joe. It was true love after all.\u201d\u00a0 As Adam pulled the wagon into the yard, he took charge again. \u201cJoe, you go in the house and get some clothes on, then come out and help feed the horses while Hoss and I stack this hay.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The middle brother had a comment as well. \u201cYeah, short stuff, you gotta get dressed \u2018cause we don\u2019t want you catching your death. But don\u2019t think you can get out of helpin\u2019 us a little neither.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cShort stuff\u201d came flying out of his nest in the hay until he was nose-to-nose with Hoss, while hanging over the wagon seat. \u201cDon\u2019t call me short. I\u2019m Little Joe, but that just means I\u2019m young; Pa told me so. But I\u2019m not short\u2026or at least I won\u2019t be for long. I\u2019ll be big just like you someday.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cDidn\u2019t mean no harm, Joe, but I think you might be wrong about a few things. I\u2019m big because Pa and my ma were tall. Pa says that Ma was six feet tall in her stockin\u2019 feet and could even beat him in a wrestlin\u2019 match. Ain\u2019t that right, Adam?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cInger was tall, Hoss, but Pa was teasing you a little when he said those things. Your mother was slim and pretty, and very much a lady.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI know that. I\u2019m just thinkin\u2019 that with Joe\u2019s ma being so petite, he won\u2019t get so big as he\u2019s thinkin\u2019 he will.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Joe\u2019s fists pummeled his middle brother\u2019s back as he cried, \u201cDon\u2019t you say nothin\u2019 mean about my ma! She was good and kind and beautiful.\u201d Sinking back into the wagon, his tears streaked his dirty face as he sobbed again. \u201cJust you mind what you say about Ma, Hoss.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam brought the team to a stop while noting that Hoss was staring at his little brother agape, then looked toward his older brother and shrugged his shoulders. Reaching back, Adam tousled Little Joe\u2019s hair. \u201cI think you misunderstood something, Joe. When Hoss said that your mother was petite, he wasn\u2019t saying anything bad about her. Petite means that she was dainty and had a smaller build than his mother. That\u2019s all. Your mother was beautiful, just as you said, and we all think she was a wonderful lady, so dry your tears and do as we asked, all right?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

All three boys went silent. The simple conversation over how tall their mothers had been had reopened the wounds of loss just enough to let the pain seep in. Adam had known Inger and Marie but never his own mother and often thought that was the hardest part of all. He could appreciate what they had lost, but at least they had some memories. Hoss had only been a baby when Inger had died, but Adam had always been willing to tell him about her, knowing it was important to keep her alive in the boy\u2019s heart. He repeated the stories of how Inger had looked at him when he was first born, or cooed and sang while she kissed him and held him tight as the wagon rocked on the journey. And he\u2019d recalled the same sort of memories for Little Joe in the weeks after Marie\u2019s death.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

But when it came to his mother, there was little to be told. His father had explained that Elizabeth had looked lovingly at him lying next to her and regretted that she had to leave her beautiful son, but had soon passed on. Part of him wished his father would have embellished the story for him, but the other part knew that the loss and turn of events at his birth had been so difficult for the man that he was glad his father remembered as much as he did. Adam had lived on dreams of Elizabeth in the lonely times. It was there that she came and held him and told him of her pride and love. It was in his dreams that he got to know his mother and there that he could make her real.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***
\nStill inside the house, Ben had heard the conversation clearly and laughed at Hoss\u2019 description of Inger, but as the silence ensued, he knew exactly what his sons were thinking about and quickly exited to greet them.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s quite some load of hay you three have balanced on that wagon. You know, I was hoping you\u2019d show up soon. I\u2019ve been home for a couple of hours already and this house just seemed way too quiet.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Joe came flying over the side of the wagon into his father\u2019s arms. \u201cI\u2019m glad you\u2019re home, Pa!\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben held onto the youngster as he took in his odd apparel and then looked up to see the other two sitting there in their undershirts and started to laugh. \u201cI\u2019d ask why Joe\u2019s wearing both your shirts and has no shoes, but I think I\u2019m better off not knowing.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI caught a big frog, Pa, and then fell in.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFell in where? Where were you boys?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam explained, \u201cWe were loading hay while Joe played by the stream at the edge of the field.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben was puzzled. \u201cBut that stream only runs a few inches deep this time of year. What could Little Joe possible fall into?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s like asking how the wind blows, Pa. We really don\u2019t know what makes it happen, but it does, and Joe will find the only deep place in a shallow stream to fall into while chasin\u2019 a frog. That\u2019s just the truth of the matter.\u201d Hoss handed the child\u2019s wet clothing down to his father. \u201cAnd right here\u2019s the proof.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Shifting Little Joe onto his hip, Ben grabbed the dripping bundle while giving instructions. \u201cYou two get started on that hay while I get the frog catcher put back into working order. Then I\u2019ll give you a hand.\u201d Heading toward the house, he turned back as he remembered the other wagon. \u201cAdam, Will Cass\u2019 buckboard is next to the house. Your crate of books from Boston arrived, so why don\u2019t you and Hoss carry it inside before you start on the hay so I can get that team put up for the night after I finish with Joseph.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam nearly flew out of the wagon just as his little brother had moments before. \u201cC\u2019mon Hoss, let\u2019s take care of that so we can get done.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cHold yer horses, brother. I\u2019m comin\u2019.\u201d As Hoss dropped from the wagon, he muttered, \u201cI ain\u2019t never seen no one so gosh durn excited about a box full of books, and I just betcha it\u2019s heavy too.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben was helping Little Joe find clothes when he heard a yelp outside the room. Checking to see why, he found Adam holding his bloody arm. \u201cWhat happened?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThis house is too small, Pa! I raked my elbow on the wall when we turned the corner out of the stairway with the crate.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cLet\u2019s see the damage.\u201d Ben reached for the boy\u2019s arm, but Adam professed that he was fine and finished moving the books into his room. The man knew the excitement his oldest son was feeling at that moment. He figured his arm could have been broken and he wouldn\u2019t have felt a thing and watched with interest as Adam opened the lid with a crowbar he\u2019d thought ahead to bring along. Ben smiled as his son picked up one of the largest tomes and ran his finger across the embossed gold title with reverence.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cAin\u2019t that somethin\u2019.\u201d Even Hoss understood his brother\u2019s awe. \u201cI ain\u2019t never seen a book as fancy as that! And there\u2019s so many in there, Adam. How you ever gonna study all that?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It was the same question Adam was asking himself. \u201cI\u2019m not sure Hoss, but I\u2019m sure gonna have fun finding out.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***<\/strong><\/p>\n

With supper finished, Hoss and Joe had gone to bed without complaint. The day of work and fresh air had worn them out to the point where sleep seemed like the best option. Adam had spread a few of his new books on the table downstairs and was eagerly paging through one of them when his father returned from making his rounds of the property as he did each night. He grabbed the newspaper he\u2019d been reading earlier and brought it to the table to share the lamp\u2019s light.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, could we talk about a couple of things before either of us becomes too absorbed in what we\u2019re doing?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben loved it when Adam took on the serious tone he had just used to indicate their need to talk. He\u2019d always spoken that way, even when just a small boy, and it indicated something he\u2019d given a great deal of thought to. A one sided grin creased the father\u2019s cheek before adopting a more serious look as he put his paper down. \u201cWhat\u2019s on your mind, son?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWell, first off, I was serious before when I said this house is too small.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

He had to concentrate to make his reply without smiling as he teased, \u201cSo your home isn\u2019t good enough for you anymore?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s not that. I\u2019ll be going away soon and that\u2019ll ease the problem a little, but it\u2019s still going to be too small as those two upstairs continue to grow. Hoss will undoubtedly take over my room once I\u2019m away, but with that wingspan he\u2019s already got, I suspect he\u2019s going to be a really big guy. He and Joe are packed so tightly into that bedroom they share now that one of them has to leave just so the other can change his mind.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben laughed explosively. \u201cI think you\u2019ve been hanging out with Hugh too much, Adam. You\u2019re developing some very interesting ways of getting your point across.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam grinned, \u201cThat\u2019s probably true, but don\u2019t change the subject. In a couple of years you, Hoss and Joe will be fighting for enough air to breath in here over the winter.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Shaking his head, he chuckled. \u201cYou never bring up a problem without having a solution in mind, so let\u2019s see what you\u2019ve got up your sleeve.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The son\u2019s smile was broad as he produced a handful of paper from under one of the books. \u201cI\u2019ve been drawing out some ideas.\u201d Adam laid them out for his father to look over as he began explaining his thoughts. \u201cWe can leave the house where it is and use the fireplace as the center point and build up around what we have now.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThat sounds interesting. Keep going.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Pointing to the first sketch he continued, \u201cWe\u2019d actually leave some of the current walls up to use as structural supports and work them into the design, knocking out the ones we don\u2019t need when we get the new walls up. Our present kitchen area would become a bedroom for company and we\u2019d add on a new kitchen and dining room.\u00a0 We\u2019d actually bump out the walls a good 12-15 feet all around, giving you an area to do your paperwork along with ample space for comfortable furniture and places to be together or apart. \u00a0Adam grabbed another set of drawing, explaining, \u201cThere\u2019d be a large, open staircase just off the living area going up to four or five bedrooms on the second level, depending on how large you want each room to be.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI really like this, son. Would you build the new walls with logs?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThought about it, but I\u2019m thinking more toward squared beams, filling between them with mortar. \u00a0It would be nearly as thick as logs, providing good heat retention, and we could use any size tree, shaping them to approximately the same size. Here\u2019s what I think it would look like.\u201d He laid a few exterior perspectives out for Ben to look over.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cFor being as large as you\u2019re talking, it still has a natural look. I really like what you\u2019ve done here. One question though: your drawing looks like there\u2019s open beams in the downstairs ceiling. How would that work?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cSince we want bedrooms upstairs, we can\u2019t really do that, but we can give the illusion by making it a 12 foot rise down here and placing beams across the expanse to look like it\u2019s open.\u201d Adam looked up to wink at his father. \u201cAnd with as high as that sounds, I\u2019m just hoping Hoss won\u2019t be scraping his head someday\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cLet me think on this a bit and we\u2019ll discuss it in a day or two, but honestly, it looks just about perfect.\u201d Ben sifted through the sheets again, smiling broadly at the detail and thought his son had put into the effort. He picked up his newspaper but remembered, \u201cDid you say you had two things you wanted to talk about? What\u2019s the other?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Unsure of how to approach the topic, Adam decided the direct method would be best. \u201cI want to start carrying that spare Colt Patterson you\u2019ve got, Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Sitting up straighter, Ben eyed his son with concern. \u201cI don\u2019t think so.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhy not?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cBecause I said no. I think that should be enough. You already carry a rifle, so why would you need a side piece?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve got good reasons, so please hear me out before making a final decision.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m listening.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI know I have a Kentucky long-rifle, but it takes almost two minutes just to reload the thing if I miss, and since it\u2019s with my saddle, it\u2019s not always convenient to run back to grab it if something unexpected happens.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cSo, don\u2019t miss.\u201d Ben smiled. \u201cYou\u2019re a good shot, Adam, and I don\u2019t think you\u2019ve had a lot to shoot at, have you?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam had to agree, \u201cI generally hit what I aim at.\u201d His mind was searching for the right words to convince his father of his need and it finally came to him in brilliant clarity, \u201cBut it stuck me today that when we heard Little Joe scream, Hoss and I just stopped what we were doing and ran. I didn\u2019t grab the rifle from the wagon because all I could think of was seeing what was wrong. Luckily he\u2019d just fallen in, but if there\u2019d been a snake or animal menacing him instead, I wouldn\u2019t have had time to run back for the rifle.\u00a0 If I\u2019d had the Colt with me, I\u2019d have been ready no matter what I\u2019d found.\u201d He let his youngest brother\u2019s peril hang in the air as fodder.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben rested his elbows on the table while scrubbing his face with roughened hands. His son had just made a compelling argument, but he wasn\u2019t ready to let him take that step into manhood\u2026not yet. \u00a0\u201cYou have a point, but you\u2019re not ready to carry a gun.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Anger crept into Adam\u2019s voice as he faced this new wrinkle. \u201cWhat\u2019s that supposed to mean?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s my point. If you don\u2019t see the other consequences of carrying a revolver capable of shooting off five rounds before reloading, then you aren\u2019t ready to have it.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cPa! I\u2019m responsible.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t get it. It\u2019s not you I\u2019m worried about. It\u2019s all the others who might think they need to challenge your responsibility. Once that gun\u2019s \u2018round your waist, you have to be able to use it\u2026no matter what, and I\u2019m not ready to live with you having to make those choices: not yet. You can have the Colt or any other weapon you choose when you\u2019re through with school, but I don\u2019t want to worry about you wearing a gun until then.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s glare softened as he realized it was of no use to challenge his father over something he was this set against and chose a different course of action. \u201cAll right, Pa. But could we get it out tomorrow so I can fire off a few rounds? I haven\u2019t shot it for a while and I\u2019d like to know I\u2019d be able to do it if I there\u2019d ever be the need.\u201d He added a big smile to encourage his father\u2019s agreement.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cIt really should be fired again, so sure, we\u2019ll get it out, clean it and make sure it still works. But that doesn\u2019t mean I\u2019ll change my mind.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sure it doesn\u2019t, Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***<\/strong><\/p>\n

With chores finished the following day, Adam set an assortment of empty bottles and cans on pieces of firewood he\u2019d stood on end.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben exited the barn to see the shooting gallery and remembered his promise from the night before. \u201cYou sure you want to do this now? It\u2019s been a long day.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

They had to do this now; there was no doubt in Adam\u2019s mind. They were only days from riding out to the herd again, and the words that Randall had taunted him with continued to play in his mind. He had to know if what the snake had said about his father being too slow to go up against him was true, and there was only one way to find out. \u201cSeems like as good a time as any. We can pretend that some of these cans are our problems and blast away at them.\u201d He heard his father chuckle as he headed toward the house. Adam tried to keep the tightness from his voice as he offered, \u201cJust relax a little Pa, I\u2019ll run up for the gun. Just tell me where you keep it.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben had no reason to suspect that his son had any other motive than simply wanting to shoot; having a pistol was every young man\u2019s rite of passage in the West. \u201cIt\u2019s folded in a blanket under my bed.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

He was back outside in no time and grabbed the cleaning supplies and oil from the barn while his father pulled the Patterson from the folds of material. With the preparations finished, Adam began to load the front of each of the five chambers with a lead ball and black powder, while sealing the back of the chamber with a percussion cap. This procedure had become familiar enough that he did it with caution even while not giving it a great deal of thought. He was thinking of Randall as his father gave his customary gun handling speech while Adam nodded at the appropriate places and said Un-huh from time to time to make the man think he was listening.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cRemember that the Colt is single action requiring that you pull the hammer to drop the trigger into place for each of the five shots on the revolving cylinder. \u00a0Once you pull the trigger, the hammer strikes the cap which ignites the powder sending out its payload.\u201d The man stopped as he realized his son\u2019s attention was elsewhere. \u201cAdam! Are you listening to me?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

His cheeks blazed red as he knew he\u2019d been caught. \u201cSure, Pa. The hammer strikes the percussion cap to discharge the projectile.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s voice took on a serious\u2014better pay attention to me, son\u2014tone. \u201cI know this is routine for you. I know you can handle this gun and you seem mighty anxious to get to the shooting part, but that makes me uneasy. \u00a0This isn\u2019t about shooting: it\u2019s about understanding that there has to be a connection between your head and your hand that flows through your soul. With that connection, a gun is a tool, just like any other that you\u2019ll use out here, and will serve you well. Without that connection, a gun is a weapon and there\u2019s nothing on earth that can protect you from what will happen. When a trigger is pulled, that round can kill a snake or a man, and you\u2019ll have to live with whichever it is you\u2019re pointing at. That\u2019s why I won\u2019t let you have it now. You don\u2019t have that instinct yet, and I frankly don\u2019t want you to have it.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI get it, Pa. I\u2019m sorry I wasn\u2019t paying attention. But I just want to shoot a couple of cans.\u201d Adam\u2019s apology was accepted as his smile was returned. \u201cI promise that when I use this gun for real, I\u2019ll remember everything you just said.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I think you\u2019re loaded. Better get to shootin\u2019 those cans before they run off.\u201d Ben\u2019s mind was still not settled. \u201cYou sure there\u2019s nothing more to this, Adam?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s, \u201cNo Pa, don\u2019t worry,\u201d was drowned out as he pulled the trigger and the noise of the firing filled the air between them. He only hit two cans on the first pass, but by the fifth load had managed five out of five. As he set them up for another round he rounded up five more pieces of wood and cans that he placed a short distance from the first set. He\u2019d seen his father\u2019s eyebrows raise in question and finally issued his challenge. \u201cHey, Pa, how about you and I draw at the same time and see who knocks off the most targets.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhy don\u2019t you shoot first and I\u2019ll go after you finish?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019d like to draw together.\u201d He paused, unsure of how to phrase his thought, but his father broke in.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWant to see if you\u2019re faster than the old man, is that it?\u201d Ben laughed, knowing full well that this day would come. So far he\u2019d always managed to do things a little bit better than his sons, but he knew one day they\u2019d outdraw and outwork him.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI suppose that\u2019s true.\u201d Adam\u2019s hand began shaking as he saw his father take his stance in readiness. \u201cYou want to count it down, or should I?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben looked over and grinned. \u201cYou ready?\u201d The nod was barely noticeable as his son set himself: \u201cThree\u2026two\u2026one\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s shot sent one of his cans flying before his father\u2019s gun cleared the holster. But even though Ben\u2019s draw was slower, he hit every target while Adam only got the first one to fall, and their last shots ended in a dead tie.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re definitely a faster draw than me, son, but speed is no substitute for accuracy. Make sure you point toward the object you\u2019re shooting at. That\u2019s about the best you can manage with a Patterson in a quick draw.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cSometimes speed is the only thing that counts, Pa. One good shot is all you need if you\u2019re fast enough.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t like you saying things like that. Did you hear what I said before? A gun is only as good as the heart of the man using it. People who talk like that\u2026well I just don\u2019t want you to think that way. When you do start carrying a gun, you\u2019ll be more accurate than fast. I\u2019ll see to that.\u201d Ben tried to read his son\u2019s expression but was unable to see what his eyes were hiding. Finally deciding it was just his youth, he came to him, grabbing his shoulder affectionately, \u201cYou\u2019ve done some fine shooting today, but it\u2019s time we clean this mess up and get inside. Your brothers will be back from town with Hop Sing any minute and I don\u2019t want them getting any ideas about shooting too. Heaven knows, Hoss will be pestering me soon enough.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

A few days after their discussion about the gun, father and son were preparing to ride to camp to help move the herd. Ben found his eldest finishing breakfast when he came downstairs. Noting the bedroll and supplies on the bench near the door, he figured Adam was ready to head out soon as he was done eating. \u201cI see you\u2019re about ready to go. You know I have to go into town first but will meet you at camp this evening so we can discuss a few things with Hugh.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam nodded as he took another bite of bread. \u201cI\u2019ll see you then,\u201d came out muffled by the food he was chewing. Taking a final swig of coffee, he wiped his mouth on the back of his hand and headed for the barn. He took his time as he willed his father to hurry with his departure. When he couldn\u2019t stall any longer, he finally called out his goodbye and took off across the field until he could pull over and wait in a brushy area where he wouldn\u2019t be seen while waiting for his father to leave.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cFinally!\u201d he muttered as he saw Ben\u2019s buckskin head off in the direction of town, waiting until he was sure the man was gone before he retraced his path back to the house. He took the steps two at a time as he hurried to his father\u2019s bedroom. When he left the house a few minutes later, the Colt was loaded, buckled around his waist and tied to his leg. It felt foreign hanging there: like a visible lie, but he\u2019d decided it was a necessary lie if he wanted to make sure his father lived through the day. His hope was that Hugh had already sent Randall away and he could simply hide the gun in his saddlebag and return it to its place under the bed before his father realized it was gone.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Those hopes were dashed as he rode into camp and saw the unsettling grin of the man watching his every move. His meager breakfast suddenly weighed like a boulder in his gut and his heart raced as his palms began to sweat. Yet Randall seemed cordial enough, nodding to him as he dismounted and went to talk with Hugh. His new hope was that the man had found some other passion that needed his attention and had given up on Ben and Adam Cartwright.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Once they\u2019d sent the hands out to the sections of the herd they\u2019d be moving, Hugh threw the last of the supplies in the wagon and came over to where Adam was preparing to mount up. \u201cThat hardware on your hip is new. Looks just like the one your pa carries. He know you got it on?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s between my father and me.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThat sounds like a coward\u2019s way of saying he doesn\u2019t know, so I have to ask why? What\u2019s going on with you that you\u2019d go against his judgment?\u201d Hugh waited for an answer that didn\u2019t come. \u201cYou\u2019ve made some good progress toward becoming a man this summer, so don\u2019t go spoiling that. If something\u2019s bothering you speak up now before you find yourself knee deep in cow dung without a rope to pull you out.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam struggled with a response. He thought maybe he should be honest and tell the foreman about Randall\u2019s threats, but then remembered that these men took care of their own business and didn\u2019t expect others to fight their battles or solve their problems. \u201cDon\u2019t you mind, Hugh. I\u2019ve got a rope hanging right here on my saddle and suspect if I end up mired in dung I can toss and end to you and you\u2019d yank me out.\u201d With a wave and a forced laugh, he rode toward the herd.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hugh gave final instructions to the wagon driver, then rode to check the perimeter of the herd to make sure everyone was in place before giving the signal to head out. It was normal for him to ride up front and make rounds now and again to insure those bringing up the rear weren\u2019t lagging, but today he sent Mark to the front while he positioned himself close to Adam. He didn\u2019t want to seem obvious about it, so kept a goodly distance while still being able to see the boy\u2026and anyone else who might stray over that way.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It was a beautiful, sun-filled fall day, but with a strong wind that was blowing dust clouds and dead brush that startled the steers at the edge of the herd. Hugh had seen Adam ride off a couple of times to bring strays back, but so far nothing seemed out of the ordinary. When a cluster of steers Hugh was riding herd on took off in their own direction he rode after them, and when he finally finished rounding up the last ones, \u00a0he looked over toward where Adam should be and his heart sank in fear; he was nowhere in sight. Standing in the stirrups, he gave a broader look around but still saw no sign of the youngster. It hadn\u2019t taken that long to round up the strays\u2026had it? His pulse raced as he realized that time pretty much lost its meaning in this business. Hours could pass like days, but at other times a simple chore could eat up minutes so fast it was mind boggling. Glancing up at the sun, there was no doubt that the latter was the case here. His \u201cquick\u201d foray after the strays must have stretched on for nearly an hour, as the herd had continued to move. Adam could be anywhere now. He might have ridden farther up the flank, or he could be out rounding up his own group of breakaways. The terrain was rife with rock formations and small canyons and Hugh honestly wasn\u2019t sure where to start his search for the missing Cartwright.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***<\/strong><\/p>\n

Adam had become absorbed in his work, moving along the edge of the herd. The steers seemed a little spooky but he attributed that to the wind, just as Hugh had warned might happen. There\u2019d been a few head that took off, but he\u2019d gotten to them quickly and brought them back without problems. The chill the young man had felt earlier as he\u2019d ridden into camp had eased with the sun\u2019s warmth, and the weight of the gun at his side had lightened as he realized Hugh had put Randall on the opposite side of the herd. Their efforts moving cattle to the higher grazing land would be complete by late afternoon and Adam figured his father would be at camp by that time too. Once they were both there, he could make sure Randall never got either of them alone.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

While his anxiety at confronting Randall on the ride was easing, his nervousness was growing as to how to explain to his father why he was wearing the gun. It was the only flaw in his plan, and knew he\u2019d pay the consequences. Pa might even understand his reasoning if he would stop hollering long enough to listen. But all the good reasons in the world wouldn\u2019t make up for the fact that he\u2019d gone behind his father\u2019s back\u2014even after their conversation \u00a0where he\u2019d made his feelings abundantly clear. There was no tolerance for disobedience or dishonesty in the Cartwright home, and Adam knew he\u2019d have to live with whatever punishment would come.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Even so, he was still considering what he might say to sway his father to his way of thinking when a whirl of wind, dust and debris blew hard sending several steers bolting. One group of strays stayed together and was easily rounded up, but a few had taken off in other directions. He managed to get most of them within minutes, but knew a couple had run back toward a small dead-end canyon of rocky cliffs they\u2019d passed. Riding up closer to the next drover, he called out, \u201cWhitey, keep an eye out. I\u2019m going after some wanderers.\u201d Receiving a wave of understanding, Adam rode back toward the ravine.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It still amazed him how cattle could be stampeding one minute, and settle down the next. There were indeed three fugitives from the herd wandering around the canyon, seemingly unfazed by their predicament. He rode up behind two of them using his coiled lasso as an aid to usher them back toward the outlet. However, the third steer had ventured on to the scree at the base of an outcropping, and lost its footing: first sliding and finally lodging its front legs in a depression containing larger rocks. Frightened at being trapped, it was pulling and bucking, trying to get free making Adam worry that it would break a leg and need to be put down. He dismounted and moved slowly, speaking soothingly, and was finally able to get near enough to kneel and move the largest of the rocks away, freeing the animal to trot off toward the others.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam felt him before seeing him. The warm sun couldn\u2019t prevent the chill, making him shudder as he raised his head. The realization hit that the snake had moved away from the herd, probably giving much the same excuse that he had, and had undoubtedly been watching for an opportunity.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Still mounted, Randall looked down at his prey. \u201cI was glad to see you wearing that gun this morning. Maybe you got more guts than I gave you credit for, Cartwright.\u201d Receiving no response, he slithered off his horse coming to stand no more than fifteen feet from where Adam was still crouched after releasing the steer\u2019s leg. \u201cWell, stand up boy, and let\u2019s get this over with.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWe don\u2019t really have to get anything \u2018over with,\u2019 you know.\u201d Adam still hoped reason would win out, but after extending the challenge to walk away, remembered that this man\u2019s motives were unreasoned. The boy\u2019s entire life had been formed by his father\u2019s reason and uprightness. There was always purpose in what Ben Cartwright did, and intention in how it was accomplished. Nothing was ever done without logic or justification. The Cartwright family might fight back, or even initiate a fight for rational reasons, and Adam had no doubt that his father would stand up to Randall just as he was about to if it meant protecting what he loved. But to call a man out simply because a heart was filled with hate, anger or hunger for the death made no sense at all. While he couldn\u2019t understand it, he knew he was about to face it with the best he could offer. Whether his skill with a gun was enough was still unknown.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYou ain\u2019t chickening out on me, are you, boy? You come so far, don\u2019t disappoint me now.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat do you want from me, Randall? Just tell me and get it over with.\u201d He knew what Randall wanted, yet hoped with his entire being that it was just some test to see if he was strong enough\u2026worthy to join the ranks of the loner elite. Even as hope washed over him, his life passed before him in a wave of melancholy. He recalled the travels with his father, moments with Inger and Marie, and even his brothers\u2019 antics didn\u2019t seem so hard to accept at that moment as he thought about the good times with them. His crate of text books waited for him and he feared he would never get the chance to study them. He contemplated Boston, continuing on through history without ever knowing of him, and his sadness at never meeting his grandfather. These thoughts simultaneously broke his heart and steeled his will. And what brought him to his feet and squared him to face his foe was the thought of his family trying to go on without his father if he failed in this reasonless fight.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Randall took his stance as a smile bared his dirty teeth. \u201cYou aim good now, because If you don\u2019t put me down with the first shot, I\u2019ll continue shooting until you\u2019re nothin\u2019 but a memory. Then I\u2019ll go after your pa too.\u201d A sinister laugh echoed as his hand hovered above his holster. \u201cYou go ahead and pull first, Cartwright. I don\u2019t want no one saying I didn\u2019t give you a fair chance.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s position mirrored that of the man he was facing.\u00a0 His hand hung near his gun as his fingers twitched, feeling some confidence in the fact that he\u2019d pulled the pistol\u2019s hammer back when he\u2019d first sensed Randall\u2019s presence, so once he pulled it free of the leather, he only had to point and fire. A rapid prayer crossed his consciousness as he readied to draw. \u201cPlease guide me, Lord. I know such actions may not be in your providence, but to save my father, I ask you to let me draw fast and shoot true. If I die, I ask to be in your care, but no matter the outcome, let me end this so that my family will be safe.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

He willed his hand to move toward the grip of the pistol. The cold metal greeted his palm as he withdrew the weapon in a fluid motion, bringing it to chest level as he pointed and eased the trigger back so as not to jerk upward with discharge. \u201cA tool,\u201d his father had called it. Right now it was a tool that he hoped was sending a shot of lead straight and true to end this torment. Yet, in that moment, Adam realized that Randall was engaging a similar tool, fully expecting it to find its mark as well. The scenario was proving surreal and fascinating, while all too wearying.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

A flash of fire and sound was replaced by unsettling silence as smoke drifted in lazy spirals toward the sunlit sky. One man remained standing, cradling a bloody hand, while the other lay motionless.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

As Adam lay there, he was able to hear voices in the distance. He thought Hugh was shouting at Randall to go and never return, while the man hissed that it had been a fair fight, and that there\u2019d been no cause for him to intervene. That was followed by Randall\u2019s crazed laugh as he postulated, \u201cBut it don\u2019t matter what you done, the kid\u2019s dead anyway.\u201d The conversation gave Adam pause. If Randall was truly alive, then who was dead? The truth filtered in as he realized the man was talking about him. He was certainly in pain: his shoulder ached, but he didn\u2019t feel dead. Then again, he didn\u2019t exactly know what being dead would feel like and conjectured that maybe a person\u2019s mind lingered a bit even after the body stopped and the soul passed to eternity.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cAdam! Adam, you still with us, kid?\u201d It was Hugh\u2019s voice breaking through the fog of his confusion. He struggled to sit up. \u201cYeah, I guess maybe I am.\u201d The older man\u2019s face was near his as he pushed him back down while moving clothing around to check for damage. \u201cWhat happened? Did I hit him?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hugh finished his ministrations before responding. \u201cLooks like he just grazed your right shoulder near your collarbone. Nothing serious, thank God. I can\u2019t even imagine what your pa would have done if you\u2019d been killed or seriously injured. What were you thinking?\u201d The last thought came out with unmistaken fierceness.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam sat up again and this time Hugh allowed him to stay sitting, even as his head swam with dizziness. \u201cI was just responding to a threat\u2026I guess. Tell me what happened.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

After fishing in Adam\u2019s pockets, Hugh withdrew a fairly clean neckerchief, wadding it up to place over the area on his shoulder that was oozing pink. \u201cYou were dang lucky is what happened. I don\u2019t know if you realized I\u2019d been watching over you today and when I got back with my strays, you were nowhere to be seen so I found your tracks heading back here and followed.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

A chuckle preceded Adam\u2019s admission that he did notice he was nearby but didn\u2019t realize it was intentional. \u201cWhy were you watching me?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYou were acting so strange: coming out here today with that gun strapped on you. I knew something was up and had a pretty good idea who was behind it. Thought I had you two separated, but should have known he\u2019d figure how to blend in enough to get to where he wanted to be.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam took a drink from the canteen Hugh offered before asking again, \u201cAre you ever going to tell me what happened?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI saw Randall riding in here after you, so positioned myself up on that small rise to see what would happen. Whatever it was between you two had to play out but I figured I\u2019d be nearby if you needed any help.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t need your help.\u201d The accusation was testy. \u201cI knew what I was doing.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hugh patted his shoulder while mocking, \u201cSure you did Young Cartwright.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I did. I drew and fired, and I think I even hit him.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cUh, I really hate to disappoint you, but I don\u2019t think your shot even caused a breeze near him. You fired, but your aim was high and wide. I could see that even from up there. You were fast, kid, but your\u2026ah\u2026excitement threw your aim off. It happens when you\u2019re facing a man for the first time, and don\u2019t have a killer instinct.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The wind was out of the boy\u2019s sail, \u201cWell his was off too, since he just nicked me.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hugh\u2019s laughter rang from the canyon walls. \u201cThat\u2019s because I plugged his shooting hand with my rifle just as he was pulling the trigger. I\u2019m surprised you didn\u2019t hear him wailing!\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s eyes rounded in surprise, just before he sagged. \u201cThen it wasn\u2019t a fair fight, Hugh. Why did you interfere? I was ready to die if I had to.\u201d He sighed as his head dropped to his chest, \u201cBut now it wasn\u2019t even a fair fight.\u201d His voice trailed off, not quite sure why he felt such defeat, especially since he was still alive.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The foreman squatted so he could speak directly. \u201cIt was never meant to be a fair fight, boy. Don\u2019t you understand that? Men like Randall\u2026they\u2019re too cowardly to fight someone who has experience. He picked you out the first day you walked into camp and wove his story to make sure you\u2019d eventually draw a gun against him. Getting you to lose control and respond foolishly gives him some sick satisfaction. What\u2019d he say to get you to disobey your pa and face him?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

There was silence as Adam decided whether it was time for confession. It was suddenly clear that Hugh had assessed the situation perfectly and he realized what a fool he\u2019d been. Yet, the summer had been awash in decisions of how much of what he\u2019d experienced was foolery. He had wanted this to end up being nothing more than a sinister form of hazing, but it hadn\u2019t been. \u00a0He finally decided it was time to allow someone else\u2019s judgment to help him with what had happened before he faced his father.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cRandall said he hated the Cartwrights and figured the world would be better off without one of us: meaning me or Pa. I still don\u2019t know what Pa or I ever said to him that made him so angry, but he implied we\u2019d disrespected him. He said I\u2019d better start wearing a gun or he\u2019d go after Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hugh interjected, \u201cLet me guess, he said that Ben was older and slower and didn\u2019t stand a chance against him, but you just might.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

A nod confirmed the thought. \u201cWhere\u2019s Randall now, Hugh? Did I just hear you send him away?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cCouldn\u2019t do nothing else, kid. He was right; he let you draw first.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Terror clouded Adam\u2019s thoughts. \u201cBut what if he hangs around to try again\u2026or goes after Pa!\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cSettle down.\u201d He laid a firm hand on the boy\u2019s uninjured shoulder. \u201cYou don\u2019t know men like Randall, but I do. He wanted to face you, not your pa. Ben would have known better or at least would have been a better adversary in a gunfight. I doubt your pa can outdraw you, but he can outshoot you any day and he wouldn\u2019t have missed. Randall knew that and this was never about risking his life. I told you before that you and your pa wear your care for each other for everyone to see. Randall knew that if he threatened you, you\u2019d have shrugged it off because you\u2019re too smart to get into a fight over some slur or slight against you. But if he threatened your family, he knew you\u2019d fight to protect them. He was right and got you to do some stupid things just to prove how right he was.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYou really don\u2019t think he\u2019ll be back for me?\u201d He still didn\u2019t understand who he\u2019d faced.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cNo he won\u2019t. You see, you\u2019ll never be that dumb, scared kid again. Even if you faced him this minute, you\u2019d be different. You\u2019d aim truer and be hardened in the fight. Randall had one chance with you, and he knows it\u2019s gone. Somewhere down deep, I think he\u2019s afraid that if you are dead, your father will hunt him down and kill him like the mangy animal his is, so he\u2019s probably as far away as his horse can carry him right now, and headed for a place to hide out until he finds some other new young sucker to play.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cHow am I ever going to explain this to Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s up to you, but I\u2019ll help a little too. I think it\u2019s partly my fault for not getting rid of that snake as soon as I realized what he was, and for not hogtying you until you told me what was going on this morning.\u201d He helped Adam to stand. \u201cYou should probably ride on to camp now and wait for your pa to get there.”<\/p>\n

Feeling sturdier that he thought he would, Adam refused to leave the group. \u201cPa won\u2019t be there until later and it\u2019s\u00a0 nothing more than a cut, so it shouldn\u2019t hurt that much.\u201d He lifted the fabric covering the wound, observing with relief that there was very little blood. \u201cIt does look a little strange: kind of ragged, but not too bad. I\u2019ll get those three strays rounded up and back to the herd.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hugh agreed, figuring the boy would want to delay the confrontation with Ben Cartwright as long as possible. \u201cIf you\u2019re up to it, go ahead. I\u2019ll be moving forward now to make sure they\u2019re doing all right up there. You can cover the rear section and make sure we get all of them to where we\u2019re going.\u201d He looked back as he left the canyon, relieved to see Adam mounted up and sitting tall.\u00a0 Waving his hat, he called out, \u201cSee you in a couple of hours.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Outside the shelter of the canyon basin, the wind was still blowing and causing problems with the herd. Adam was forced to ride after stragglers and strays many times, overusing his wounded shoulder either controlling his horse or throwing a rope. Early evening shadows were covering the hillside by the time they\u2019d ushered the last of the stock into the grassy plateau and the men could head to camp for food and rest.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam had donned his thick wool jacket earlier, hoping the added warmth would help to keep his shoulder loose when it had tightened and begun to ache as the afternoon wore on. He\u2019d noticed that he was sweating heavily under the coat as he\u2019d brought up the last of the herd, but hadn\u2019t paid much mind as he struggled just to get finished. Now he was shivering so hard that the reins quivered in his hands. It didn\u2019t surprise him. With the sweating he\u2019d been doing, it was only reasonable that he\u2019d feel chilled now that the air was cooling. As his horse trotted into camp, he saw his father\u2019s buckskin and knew judgment time was near. After tying his horse and removing the saddle, he made sure it had water and hay and walked slowly toward where his father was sitting.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s eyes caught those of his son as he entered the edge of camp, and then gave him a once over, stopping at holster lever. He\u2019d heard the story already from Hugh and knew there was an injury, but until he saw the gun hanging there, he\u2019d been unwilling to believe it.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hugh had been true to his word, trying to deflect some of the blame and anger. \u201cBen, the boy thought he was doing the right thing. He knew what you\u2019d say if he told you about it and wasn\u2019t willing to risk your life when he thought he had a better answer\u2026even if it was stupid.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cStupid doesn\u2019t even begin to cover it,\u201d the angry and frightened father had growled. \u201cHe may have done it for the right reasons, but he still betrayed my trust.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The foreman had tried again, \u201cYou know he\u2019s been going through a lot this summer with the hands. He\u2019s been fair game and the unwritten code is that you take it and keep your mouth shut. The kid has earned the respect of every man out here because he didn\u2019t go running to you for help. I told you what was going on so you\u2019d know, but you didn\u2019t force him to tell you about it or use your clout to stop it. How was this any different?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThe difference is that he lied to me, or failed to tell me the truth, then manipulated me into helping him practice and finally went behind my back to risk his life. That\u2019s a whole world of difference.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t think it felt like it was to him, sir.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s cross harrumph had ended the conversation and they\u2019d moved on to plans for the winter and the impending loss of the ranchers who\u2019d been helping out over the summer. They\u2019d be returning to their own ranches and taking ten head of cattle with them for their efforts. Ben ran through the method he\u2019d allow for them to choose their stock and how Hugh would cover their absence.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The smell of cooking beans and meat was curling around the campsite as Adam made his way toward his father, knowing by the look on the man\u2019s face, that he was likely to be losing a whole lot more than a shred of skin on his shoulder. His only hope was that his father wouldn\u2019t withhold his coming departure for school. In Adam\u2019s mind, he could see the man making the assessment that if he couldn\u2019t trust him to obey him in something this important, then leaving to be alone in a strange city was definitely out of the question. He felt nauseous and wasn\u2019t sure if it was apprehension or the smell of the food. He still didn\u2019t like beans, but had come to tolerate them, so was leaning toward fear being the upsetting factor.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben stood as he neared and tipped his head in silent direction toward the outskirts of the camp where they wouldn\u2019t be overheard. News of the day\u2019s event had spread like wildfire through the men and they looked up as Adam passed, giving barely noticeable nods and quick, sad smiles. They understood, yet also knew that the Cartwright family operated under a more rigid set of principles than most of their family\u2019s had, and had no idea how bad a time Young Cartwright was in for.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Out of earshot, Ben exploded, \u201cHow dare you disobey me and put your life at risk?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The young man met his father\u2019s ferocity head on. \u201cI had no other choice.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben began pacing. \u201cThere are always options. You know that!\u201d He shook his head and repeated, \u201cYou know that, Adam!\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cMost times I do. And I did make a choice. It just wasn\u2019t the one you would have made. But\u2026\u201d He didn\u2019t know how to say what he needed to without hurting his father more. \u201cI had you shoot with me, and you were too slow, Pa. I knew you would never draw in time to take a shot. Randall was a gunfighter. He knew he could outdraw you\u2026 Even I could.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s eyes blazed hot with anger, and yet softened for a moment. \u201cI tried to tell you the other day that speed isn\u2019t everything. It can be in a real gunfight, but from what Hugh told me, this man wasn\u2019t really what you thought he was. If you\u2019d trusted me enough to tell me your concerns about my being too slow\u2026or old and feeble\u2026whatever your fears were\u2026I could have helped you figure that out.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s all hindsight, and everything makes more sense that way: if I would have\u2026if he would have\u2026 if you had been. Joe said that to me the other day when I explained what all might have happened when he fell in the water. He said that it was all a lot of what if\u2019s considering all he wanted to do was to catch a frog, and just did what he needed to do. I just did what I needed to do too.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The anger returned. \u201cSince when is the right thing to do to lie and go behind my back when I\u2019ve given you my final word on a subject?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam was truly Ben\u2019s son, and still did not back down. \u201cI had to do it because you wouldn\u2019t listen to me. I told you I might need a gun to kill a wild animal. Randall was a wild animal and I had to at least try to save you from him just as surely as I would have stopped an animal from attacking Hoss or Little Joe.\u201d He had to sit down on a nearby rock. The shakiness he\u2019d felt earlier was back and his heartbeat was throbbing in his neck as sweat poured from his face and further wet his shirt under his jacket. With effort, he was able to complete his thoughts. \u201cHoss and Little Joe have already lost their mothers. They couldn\u2019t lose you too. If Randall was intent on killing one of us, it had to be me, and I thought maybe I\u2019d be good enough for just that one moment to make things right.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben took a good look at his son, noting his pale complexion, the rivulets of sweat running from his temples and noted that he\u2019d swayed briefly before sitting down. \u201cHow badly were you hurt, Adam? Hugh implied it only tore your skin a little.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cA flesh wound in my right should\u2026\u201d Adam\u2019s eye rolled as he slid down the rock onto his back, unable to stay sitting.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Rushing to his side, Ben grabbed his own neckerchief and dabbed away the moisture from the boy\u2019s face, as he chuckled softly. \u201cYou never were one to like the talk of blood.\u201d But as he began to unbutton Adam\u2019s jacket for a look at the damage, he hollered toward camp for help and a lantern.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The group came running with Hugh in the lead. Holding the lamp near enough to see, Ben and the foreman gasped to find the young man\u2019s clothing and jacket lining drenched with dark red blood. The cloth covering the \u201cnick\u201d was soaked to saturation and when lifted, they found a steady flow of blood issuing from what they quickly decided was a\u00a0torn blood vessel.**<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI thought you told me it was a scratch!\u201d Ben roared at Hugh.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI swear it didn\u2019t even bleed at first but it must have damaged something that got worse with him moving around.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam had remained silent while still alert enough to realize there was a serious problem. He reached for his father\u2019s arm, holding on tightly. \u201cPa, I just wanted to…\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ben rested a hand on his son\u2019s cheek. \u201cAdam, I understand. Let\u2019s just get you fixed up now. We\u2019ll carry you to the wagon and get that bleeding stopped. That\u2019s all you need to worry about.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI can walk there.\u201d His strength built for the effort as he pulled away from Ben, using his good arm to push up on the rock behind him while several of the crew rushed over to support his ascent. He smiled as he stood before his father. \u00a0\u201cSee?\u201d The smile left along with the brief color that had risen in his cheeks with physical exertion. His head spun as the truth of Randall\u2019s earlier words whispered in his ears: \u201cIt don\u2019t matter\u2026 the kid\u2019s dead anyway.\u201d He spoke his torment through a final heavy sigh, \u201cI\u2019m sorry, Pa\u2026\u201d as he crumbled to the ground and dissolved into unending darkness.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The end…<\/p>\n

Next Story in the It’s Only a Year Series:<\/strong><\/p>\n

It’s Only a Year –\u00a0 The Quiet of Uncertainty – A Lesson in Hope<\/a>
\nIt’s Only a Year – The Final Trial – A Lesson in Mettle<\/a><\/p>\n

*Barbara Allen, Arranged by Harvey Reid<\/em><\/p>\n

**It is possible to be bleeding and not be aware of it and I am living proof. After nicking my ankle with a wash basket, I didn\u2019t realize I was bleeding until I noticed bloody footprints on the floor. Still clueless, I thought I\u2019d stepped in raspberry jam and started cleaning the floor until I noticed that my shoe was red. Looking more closely, I was shocked to find that my pants hem, sock, insole and shoe were so saturated with blood that it was coming through the sole and leaving the prints. Once I rolled the sock down, blood started spraying everywhere and I had to call for help. I didn\u2019t lose as much blood as I have Adam losing, but it can happen.<\/em><\/p>\n

End Notes:<\/b><\/em><\/p>\n

Thank you to all who have read the these episodes of It’s Just A Year. This is an exercise in writing for me – to contruct a story in parts that come together as a full look at a year in Adam’s life. It’s been fun and I hope you’re enjoying them.<\/em><\/p>\n

Disclaimer:\u00a0All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

<\/g><\/svg><\/i> \"Loading\"<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Summary: \u00a017 year old Adam has\u00a0proven himself to the Ponderosa ranch hands after a summer of hazing, and is finally enjoying his\u00a0his last year home\u00a0before leaving for school. But his life takes a dramatic turn when he is menaced by a new addition to the crew,\u00a0and\u00a0must decide whether the man is serious in his\u00a0sinister\u00a0intent, or it’s just\u00a0another\u00a0attempt to test his mettle.\u00a0Once Adam decides\u00a0which it is, he\u00a0makes choices that\u00a0 bring him into conflict with his father and lead to the worst of consequences.<\/p>\n

Rated:\u00a0K+ \u00a0WC \u00a016,000<\/p>\n

It’s Only a Year Series, links to all the stories within the series included.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":82,"featured_media":5758,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"template-full-width-post.php","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1005,23,30],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6463","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-adam-cartwright","category-drama","category-prequels","wpcat-1005-id","wpcat-23-id","wpcat-30-id"],"a3_pvc":{"activated":true,"total_views":2081,"today_views":0},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/Adams-English-Scenic2.jpg?fit=450%2C436&ssl=1","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":46688,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=46688","url_meta":{"origin":6463,"position":0},"title":"Jingle Bull (by ElayneA)","author":"Elayne","date":"December 24, 2023","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary: Adventures in 'riding herd' leads one brother on a merry chase. 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He returns\u00a0home from a cattle drive where he's been forced to subsist on beans and\u00a0endure\u00a0hazing\u00a0by the hired hands intent on making him prove his worth,\u00a0to find\u00a0his father away,\u00a0Hoss ill and Little Joe in a state of panic.\u00a0The results\u00a0involves some very bad decisions,\u00a0a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Adam Cartwright"","block_context":{"text":"Adam Cartwright","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=1005"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/Adams-English-Scenic2.jpg?fit=450%2C436&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":14390,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=14390","url_meta":{"origin":6463,"position":3},"title":"The Men in Black\/The Men in Jail (by Robin)","author":"profrobinw","date":"January 12, 2000","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary: \u00a0Adam finds himself in jail after running into trouble; if only he'd not left the Ponderosa. Rating: \u00a0T \u00a0(1,680 words)","rel":"","context":"In "Adam Cartwright"","block_context":{"text":"Adam Cartwright","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=1005"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/06\/ARLE-e1497282889671.png?fit=570%2C416&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/06\/ARLE-e1497282889671.png?fit=570%2C416&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/06\/ARLE-e1497282889671.png?fit=570%2C416&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":39443,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=39443","url_meta":{"origin":6463,"position":4},"title":"Hidden (by wx4rmk)","author":"wx4rmk","date":"August 6, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary: Tensions are high as a powerful snowstorm blankets the Ponderosa. However, Adam\u2019s quick thinking brings about more than one positive result. Rated: K+ Word Count: 2005","rel":"","context":"In "Writing Challenges"","block_context":{"text":"Writing Challenges","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=40"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/08\/Ponderosa-Paddlewheel-boat.jpg?fit=225%2C225&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":2166,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=2166","url_meta":{"origin":6463,"position":5},"title":"A Light in the Darkness (by pony)","author":"pony","date":"December 8, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary: \u00a0Adam Cartwright is coming home ... but the path is dark and lonely. Will there be a light at the end of the road? \u00a0 Rated:\u00a0K (1,355 words)","rel":"","context":"In "Drama"","block_context":{"text":"Drama","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=23"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/bonanza31.jpg?fit=573%2C389&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/bonanza31.jpg?fit=573%2C389&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/bonanza31.jpg?fit=573%2C389&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6463","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/82"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6463"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6463\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/5758"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6463"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6463"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6463"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}