Summary:\u00a0 Little Joe brings some unwanted guests to The Ponderosa and causes trouble for everyone.
\nRating:\u00a0 G\u00a0 (6,600 words)<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n Ben Cartwright rubbed his eyes wearily as he put his pen down on the desk. \u201cLet\u2019s have a break for a moment,\u201d he said to his son who was studying the pile of papers beside him. \u201cMy eyes are tired.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam breathed a sigh of relief and put the papers down. \u201cI\u2019m glad you said that,\u201d he said. \u201cI\u2019d forgotten just how much paperwork there is to do around here Pa.\u201d He grinned at his father as he leant back on the chair he\u2019d placed next to Ben\u2019s large leather one which always stood behind the man\u2019s desk in his study. \u201cI thought I\u2019d finished with writing so much when I graduated.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben returned the grin. \u201cThe paperwork around here never ends,\u201d he said. \u201cI must say that it\u2019s nice to have some help with it though. Since you got back last month son I\u2019ve appreciated how quickly I get through this side of things now.\u201d He glanced at the open window above his head. \u201cI\u2019d much rather be out there with your brother Hoss at the moment, I must admit.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam raised an eyebrow in that way he had that unconsciously imitated a facial quirk of his father\u2019s. \u201cWell I wouldn\u2019t,\u201d he admitted. \u201cMuch and all as I could do without all this paperwork, at least it gives me a bit of a break from being in the saddle.\u201d He shrugged. \u201cI really didn\u2019t realise how out of condition I\u2019d become having been away in Boston for three years. I can do without a day in the saddle, I can assure you.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben slapped his son on the back jovially. \u201cIt\u2019ll come back,\u201d he said. \u201cJust give it a bit of time.\u201d He jerked his head at the sound of a noise outside. \u201cI wonder who that could be?\u201d he said. \u201cHoss shouldn\u2019t be back yet.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n As the words left his mouth, the front door was flung open with a bang and a small whirlwind known to his family as Little Joe Cartwright ran into the room. \u201cHey Pa! Hey Adam! I\u2019m home!\u201d he announced happily as he ran into the study, rested his arms on his father\u2019s desk and grinned at them both.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cSo I can see,\u201d replied his father, glancing at the grandfather clock next to where Adam was sitting. \u201cAnd why would you be coming home at lunch time, pray tell?\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe continued to grin happily at his father. \u201cAin\u2019t it great?\u201d he said excitedly. \u201cI got the rest of the day off.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cJoseph?\u201d demanded his father as he gave his youngest son a stern look. \u201cWhat have you done now? Miss Jones wouldn\u2019t have sent you home for no reason, young man.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe shrugged nonchalantly, secure in the knowledge that for once he\u2019d done nothing wrong \u2026 at least nothing that he could be called to account to by his father at this precise moment. Instead, he grinned broadly and pulled a note out of his jacket pocket, waving it excitedly under Ben\u2019s nose. \u201cMiss Jones said to give this to you,\u201d he said happily. \u201cShe said I weren\u2019t to come back to school for a few days.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n He turned to Adam, his grin becoming even wider as his father took the note from his hand. \u201cAin\u2019t that great Adam?\u201d he asked his brother. \u201cI get time off school.\u201d He began to fiddle with the pencils on his father\u2019s desk as he thought about the prospects that a few days off school would bring and his mind was so full of happy thoughts of the fishing and riding he would do in those carefree hours that stretched ahead of him, that his father\u2019s voice startled him when it finally broke the silence that had developed. He jumped slightly.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cPhthiriasis,\u201d said Ben with a sigh as he placed the note on the desk and gave Joe a weary look.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam looked confused. \u201cWhat?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Now it was Ben\u2019s turn to shrug. \u201cWell, you know how Abigail Jones likes to carry on,\u201d he said. \u201cShe always has to display her knowledge of words when anyone else would just come straight out and say it plain.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cI wish someone would,\u201d said Adam, sarcastically.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben shook his head again, appearing not to have heard the comment. \u201cI\u2019ve lost count of the times \u2026.\u201d he began and then frowned at Joe who was still smiling at him happily. \u201cWho were you sitting next to?\u201d he asked suddenly.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe scratched his head thoughtfully. \u201cSeth Pruitt,\u201d he said finally. \u201cHe got sent home too.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cWhat on earth is it?\u201d asked Adam in an aggrieved tone. He wasn\u2019t used to everyone around him having a discussion and not being able to keep up with the topic, especially when one of those people was his little brother. \u201cWhat did she send him home for?\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe leant close to his brother so that their heads were almost touching. \u201cYou wanna see?\u201d he asked generously, pointing to his hair.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam gave his brother an appalled look as his meaning became obvious. \u201cDo you mean to tell me that you have \u2026.\u201d He flung himself back in his chair with a sudden movement until he hit the wall behind him.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben shook his head again as he stood up. \u201cI don\u2019t see why Abigail Jones can\u2019t just come out and say he\u2019s got nits instead of using all these \u2026\u201d he waved at the paper on his desk. \u201c\u2026 all these medical names for it. Honestly, that woman \u2026 always trying to impress everyone with her command of the English language!\u201d He looked down at the top of Joe\u2019s head and began to pick up a few of the curls reluctantly. \u201cI suppose we\u2019d better take care of it,\u201d he said. \u201cYou stay here Joseph while I get some things.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cWhat\u2019s up?\u201d asked Little Joe, taking a step towards Adam who by now was leaning back flat against the wall in order to put as much distance between himself and his brother. \u201cYou don\u2019t need to be afraid or nothing Adam. I\u2019ve had em lots of times and I don\u2019t mind em. They don\u2019t hurt or nothing.\u201d He scratched his head vigorously as their father left the room. \u201cI\u2019ll let ya look iffen you like. They\u2019s only little, but they sure can hop a long way. Seth Pruitt and me sometimes \u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam held up a hand to stop his brother. \u201cTake a step back,\u201d he instructed him. \u201cDon\u2019t you come any closer to me. I sure don\u2019t want them.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe frowned. \u201cI wasn\u2019t gonna give em to you,\u201d he declared indignantly. \u201cI was just letting you look cause I thought you might be interested.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam stood up and walked to the other side of the study away from Joe, still giving his little brother an appalled look. \u201cWell I\u2019m not,\u201d he said firmly. \u201cThe only thing I\u2019m interested in, is making sure that you don\u2019t give them to me.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n There was a sudden loud banging sound from the kitchen area and both brothers turned instantly. \u201cI\u2019d say that Hop Sing has just heard the news,\u201d said Adam sarcastically.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe nodded in agreement as he continued to scratch his head. \u201cYeah,\u201d he said. \u201cHe gets right angry whenever I come home with nits. He always says he\u2019s gonna go home to China.\u201d He gave his brother a curious look. \u201cDon\u2019t they have nits in China?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam had no time to answer, for at that moment Hop Sing entered the living room in a flurry, Ben right behind him. \u201cAlways same!\u201d the cook shouted angrily to no one in particular as he waved his arms around. \u201cNo have time for cook when now have to boil sheets and towels again!\u201d He glared at Ben as if the whole thing was his fault. \u201cHop Sing go back Old China!\u201d he finished firmly, playing his usual trump card.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben tried to look apologetic, but his tight jaw betrayed his inner thoughts of frustration. \u201cThere\u2019s no need to carry on so Hop Sing,\u201d he said calmly. \u201cIt\u2019s no one\u2019s fault.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cIs fault!\u201d shouted Hop Sing angrily, swivelling around now to glare at Joe who simply gave him a blank look in return. \u201cBoy clean when leave house, so must be getting nits from other children.\u201d He puffed himself up to his full height and added indignantly. \u201cHop Sing run clean house, but not everyone do.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben nodded wearily. \u201cI know, I know,\u201d he said. \u201cBut let\u2019s be fair about this. Joseph could have picked them up anywhere.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Hop Sing\u2019s arm movements became even wilder. \u201cNot in Hop Sing house!\u201d he shouted. \u201cKeep clean house!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben held up a hand. \u201cI didn\u2019t mean that,\u201d he said, trying to soothe the man. \u201cYou are an impeccable housekeeper Hop Sing, everyone knows that. What I meant was that he could have picked them up in the barn or anywhere else near the animals. You know how easy it is to do that.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Hop Sing looked from Ben to Joe and then back to Ben again. \u201cHmph!\u201d he said finally, before disappearing into the kitchen.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cWell, that went well,\u201d said Adam, giving his father a sympathetic look.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben rolled his eyes and shook his head slightly. \u201cDon\u2019t take too much notice of him,\u201d he replied. \u201cHe\u2019ll calm down once he gets the washing underway.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe bounded across the room to his father. \u201cDon\u2019t they have nits in China, Pa?\u201d he asked curiously.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben ignored the question and instead steered his youngest son towards the settee before pushing him down onto it. \u201cYou sit there,\u201d he said sternly. \u201cAnd don\u2019t you move a muscle young man until I come back.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe immediately looked crestfallen. \u201cYou ain\u2019t gonna cut my hair, are ya Pa?\u201d he asked in a worried tone, suddenly sensing what was about to befall him.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cI most certainly am,\u201d replied his father. \u201cAnd you\u2019re going to have it washed in \u2026..\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cIs it really necessary for him to sit there?\u201d interrupted Adam testily. \u201cRight where everyone always sits?\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben gave his son a strange look. \u201cHe\u2019s not hurting anyone,\u201d he said. \u201cIt\u2019s only for a few minutes and he\u2019ll keep his hair off the furniture.\u201d He gave Joe a meaningful look. \u201cWon\u2019t you Joseph?\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe nodded dolefully, his mind still coming to terms with the fact that he now had to endure one of his father\u2019s haircuts. Having his hair cut in town at the barber\u2019s was bad enough, but when his father decided to wield a sharp pair of scissors over him the result usually wasn\u2019t good for either of them.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam rolled his eyes. \u201cDon\u2019t you think it would be better for him to go outside?\u201d he asked pointedly. \u201cIt\u2019s bad enough that he brings nits home without giving them to everyone else.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Now it was Ben\u2019s turn to roll his eyes. \u201cFor heaven\u2019s sake Adam,\u201d he said. \u201cHe\u2019s not giving them to anyone else and \u2026. it\u2019s only nits.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cYeah,\u201d agreed Joe, scratching his head again. \u201cIt\u2019s only nits.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s disgusting,\u201d said Adam, his face showing his own disgust.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben frowned. \u201cSince when did you become so squeamish?\u201d he asked. \u201cYou\u2019ve had them a time or two yourself you know. We all have.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam looked indignant. \u201cThat was when I was a kid,\u201d he said. \u201cWhy \u2026. back east \u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben held up a hand to stop the inevitable monologue that he felt was coming. Ever since Adam had returned from college in Boston a month ago, he\u2019d had the impression that the young man looked on some of their ways out here with fresh eyes\u00a0 that had been well and truly refined by being back east at college for three years. He sincerely hoped that the time he\u2019d spent there hadn\u2019t turned him into one of those snobbish city folks that sometimes travelled through these parts on their way to San Francisco. At the moment, looking at his son\u2019s appalled expression, it seemed as if his fears might be well grounded.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cI know,\u201d he said quickly. \u201cBack east you didn\u2019t see such things as nits. Well I\u2019ll have you know that they are a part of every society. Even \u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe looked up at his father. \u201cDon\u2019t they have nits in Boston?\u201d he interrupted.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben looked down at him and then over at Adam, who was still scowling at them both. \u201cJoseph, go and sit out on the front porch while you\u2019re waiting for me,\u201d he said finally, to keep the peace.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cWhy do I have to sit out there just cause he says so?\u201d Joe demanded indignantly. \u201cMe and my nits ain\u2019t hurting anyone!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben gave him a slight push towards the door. \u201cJust go and sit outside,\u201d he said. \u201cGo on.\u201d He waited while Joe reluctantly dragged his feet towards the front door and left the room, before turning to Adam again. \u201cThere\u2019s no need to make him feel like a leper,\u201d he said shortly.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m sorry,\u201d replied Adam. \u201cI guess I\u2019m not used to such things. Back east \u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben held up his hand again. \u201cYes,\u201d he sighed. \u201cI know. Things were far too refined back there for you to be worried about such things. Well, you\u2019re home again now and I\u2019m afraid this is the way we live.\u201d His expression softened as he looked at Adam\u2019s contrite expression. \u201cPerhaps you\u2019d better wash your hair if you feel that strongly about it?\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cDon\u2019t worry,\u201d Adam assured his father. \u201cI intend to. I suppose the coal oil is still where Hop Sing used to keep it?\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n At the sound of his name, Hop Sing burst into the room again muttering under his breath in Chinese and still flinging his arms wide. At the sight of Ben and Adam he glared once more and pointed his finger in the direction of the kitchen. \u201cCopper boiling now,\u201d he said and continued to mutter to himself as he walked upstairs.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben looked at Adam and shrugged. \u201cI suppose that means we\u2019ll be getting our own supper later,\u201d he said. \u201cWhen he gets like this he\u2019ll be boiling up everything in sight for hours\u2026. Linen \u2026 blankets \u2026 towels.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cBoiling everything except our supper,\u201d said Adam morosely. \u201cI\u2019m going to get that coal oil and get started on my hair.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019ll get the scissors,\u201d said Ben, following his son towards the kitchen. \u201cI\u2019m sure not looking forward to this. Joseph hates having his hair cut at the best of times.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Outside, Joe sat on the edge of the wooden table on the front porch, swinging his legs as he watched his middle brother ride into the front yard. \u201cHey Hoss!\u201d he shouted happily as the large young man dismounted from his horse and strolled over to him.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cHey yourself,\u201d said Hoss with an easy grin as he ruffled Joe\u2019s hair and sat down on one of the wooden benches beside the table. He took off his hat, ran his fingers through his own hair and fanned himself with his hat before placing it on his head again. \u201cWhatcha doin home so early, Joe?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe gave his brother a happy grin. \u201cI\u2019m having a good day,\u201d he announced. \u201cI\u2019ve got nits.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cYeah?\u201d asked Hoss casually, leaning back on the bench and yawning slightly. \u201cGet yourself sent home again, did ya? What\u2019s fer lunch?\u201d He rubbed his stomach with satisfaction at the thought that it was again mealtime.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cDunno,\u201d Joe admitted. \u201cI sure am getting hungry though. Pa said to sit here and wait fer him, so I can\u2019t go in and get anything to eat yet but.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019ll get ya something,\u201d said Hoss, standing up. \u201cI\u2019ll get us both something from Hop Sing.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cGee thanks Hoss,\u201d said Joe, grinning at his brother. \u201cOnly I don\u2019t think Hop Sing is in the kitchen. I heard him upstairs.\u201d He pointed to the roof of the porch. \u201cHe\u2019s been talking and talking up there in my bedroom, but I think he\u2019s talking to himself cause it\u2019s all in Chinese.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Hoss nodded. \u201cProbably fixing your bed again,\u201d he observed. \u201cYou know how he gets.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n At that moment the kitchen door opened and Ben appeared, his arms full of equipment with which to attack the offending nits.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cNo Pa!\u201d shouted Little Joe, jumping to his feet in dismay as he spied the bottle swinging from one of his father\u2019s hands. \u201cThat coal oil stings!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cSit down,\u201d said Ben firmly, putting everything on the table and pulling Joe back down onto it. \u201cThis has to be done.\u201d He glanced at Hoss as he tied a large towel around Joe\u2019s neck. \u201cYou home for lunch already?\u201d he asked. \u201cYou\u2019ll have to fix yourself something son \u2026. Hop Sing is busy in the upstairs stripping all the beds.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Hoss nodded miserably. \u201cOK,\u201d he said. \u201cI\u2019ll look after myself Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cDon\u2019t forget me!\u201d Joe shouted after him. He turned his best puppy dog look onto his father. \u201cDo you haveta cut it Pa? Can\u2019t ya just wash it this time?\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m doing both,\u201d said Ben firmly as he began to attack the child\u2019s head with his comb and scissors. \u201cHold still.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t want it cut,\u201d sniffed Little Joe, the tears beginning to run down his cheeks as he turned his miserable face up towards his father. \u201cYou always cut it too short Pa!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cKeep still,\u201d Ben repeated, ignoring the tears as he concentrated on combing and cutting the unruly curls. \u201cIt has to be done Joseph, so just be quiet and I\u2019ll get it over with as quickly as possible.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cDon\u2019t do it too short,\u201d pleaded Joe, but to no avail. By the time his father had finished there were numerous curls lying on the porch floor around them and his head felt quite light.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cThere,\u201d said Ben in a satisfied tone. He stood back to survey his handiwork. \u201cNot bad, if I do say so myself.\u201d He knocked Joe\u2019s hand down as the boy put it up to feel his head. \u201cDon\u2019t touch it,\u201d he warned. \u201cThere\u2019s plenty of those little critters still in there yet.\u201d He began to sweep up the small curls on the floor as Joe looked on miserably. \u201cNow you just sit there while I get rid on these in the fire,\u201d he said, patting the child on the arm. \u201cI\u2019ll be back in a minute.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe scowled at his father as the man retreated into the house, putting his hand on his head the moment Ben had disappeared. \u201cI knew he\u2019d cut it too short,\u201d he murmured sadly to himself and then his eyes brightened as Hoss emerged from the kitchen again, carrying three large sandwiches. \u201cThanks!\u201d he said as his brother handed one to him before sitting down and proceeding to polish off the other two.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Hoss put his head on one side as he chewed and gave his younger brother\u2019s head a critical look. \u201cPa really went for it this time,\u201d he observed.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe made a face as he bit into his sandwich. \u201cI know,\u201d he said, with a full mouth. \u201cDon\u2019t know why him and Hop Sing gets so riled up about nits but. They ain\u2019t hurting anyone.\u201d He grinned. \u201cYou shoulda seen old Jonesy\u2019s face when she saw em jumping off my head in school this morning,\u201d he giggled. \u201cShe nearly screamed.\u201d He shrugged. \u201cShe don\u2019t like nits neither,\u201d he added casually.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cNeither does older brother Adam,\u201d retorted Hoss. \u201cYou should see him in there. He\u2019s scrubbing at his hair as if he\u2019s gonna scrub it away.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cDon\u2019t they have lice in Boston, Hoss?\u201d asked Joe.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Hoss shrugged as he started on the second sandwich. \u201cI reckon so Joe,\u201d he replied. \u201cCan\u2019t understand why he\u2019s so riled up bout em.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben opened the door again and strode towards them. \u201cHurry up with that sandwich,\u201d he instructed Joe. \u201cI need to wash that hair of yours.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe gulped down the last of his sandwich and gave his father another pleading look. \u201cNot the coal oil Pa,\u201d he said. \u201cIt stings!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cFirst the coal oil and then we\u2019ll try some of Hop Sing\u2019s strong lye soap,\u201d said Ben, opening the bottle and pouring some oil onto a rag.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cThere mightn\u2019t be any left,\u201d said Hoss putting the last of his sandwich into his mouth with a flourish. \u201cAdam\u2019s using most of it on his hair in the washhouse. How come he\u2019s so riled up bout all this Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cHe don\u2019t like nits,\u201d Joe observed as his father began to rub the coal oil over his head with the towel.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cWell, no one likes nits,\u201d said his father.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t mind em,\u201d interrupted Joe, his voice muffled from under the towel as his father rubbed his head vigorously. \u201cThey give me time off school and they don\u2019t hurt me none. I think they\u2019re kinda cute.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben decided to ignore the comment. \u201cAdam is just used to city ways,\u201d he explained to Hoss. \u201cHe\u2019s finding adjusting to things out here a bit strange at the moment, but he\u2019ll settle down in a while,\u201d he added, taking the towel off Joe\u2019s head and poking his fingers between the boy\u2019s shorn curls to inspect his scalp. He glanced at Hoss. \u201cYou\u2019d better do your hair too son,\u201d he said. \u201cI\u2019ll be doing mine when I\u2019ve finished this young man\u2019s.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cWill Hop Sing do his?\u201d asked Joe curiously as Ben began to rub his head again with towel. \u201cOw, Pa! That stings!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m sure he will son,\u201d said Ben. \u201cThere \u2026\u00a0 That\u2019s done \u2026 Now, into the washhouse with you and we\u2019ll get it washed.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cCan\u2019t we do it later?\u201d whined Joe. \u201cNow that I\u2019ve had lunch I was gonna go fishing.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cYou\u2019re going nowhere,\u201d said his father firmly as he gathered up his equipment again. \u201cInto the wash house please. March!\u201d He picked Joe off the table and then pointed towards the small room at the back of the kitchen.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe dug his toe into the dirt as he walked towards the house. \u201cAin\u2019t fair,\u201d he muttered under his breath. \u201cI wanted to go fishing.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben pushed him towards the bathhouse and followed him inside. As they entered the room, Adam turned to face them. \u201cDon\u2019t bring him near me,\u201d he warned his father as he rubbed at his wet hair. \u201cI\u2019m sure he\u2019s still got them.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe sniffed the air as he walked towards his brother. \u201cYou stink,\u201d he announced. \u201cAnd you look right funny Adam.\u201d He looked at his brother curiously. Adam\u2019s hair was dripping wet and stuck out in all angles with a foamy green gel-like substance that was matted through it.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cYou\u2019ll smell the same in a minute or two,\u201d replied Adam in a huffy tone. \u201cHop Sing said to try this.\u201d He held out a bottle to his father. \u201cHe said it\u2019s made from sweet wormwood and chrysanthemums.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cWhat?\u201d said Ben, staring at the bottle curiously. \u201cI was going to use lye soap.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam rubbed at his hair again. \u201cHe said to try this. Old Chinese remedy, he said.\u201d He sniffed the air. \u201cAll I can say it that it had better work, because it sure smells horrible.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben opened the bottle and sniffed it before making a wry face. \u201cWell it\u2019s worth a try,\u201d he said, trying not to laugh out loud at the sight of Adam\u2019s hair.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cI ain\u2019t having that stuff on my hair!\u201d announced Little Joe suddenly. \u201cIt\u2019s horrible!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cNo more horrible than the nits you\u2019ve kindly brought home to share,\u201d said Adam sarcastically. \u201cRemind me not to get too close to you for a long time.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe poked put his tongue at his brother. \u201cAin\u2019t my fault!\u201d he declared.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cHop Sing said to let it dry on the hair,\u201d instructed Adam, as Ben pulled Joe by the arm towards a large washbasin. \u201cRub it into his wet head first and then just let it sit for a while.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cNo!\u201d shouted Joe, as his father bent his head forward over the basin and poured a bucket of cold water over his hair. \u201cI don\u2019t want it!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cBe quiet Joseph,\u201d said Ben sternly. \u201cI\u2019m having it too \u2026. We all are.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cThanks to you,\u201d said Adam smugly, sitting down and enjoying the sight of his miserable little brother having the gel rubbed through his hair. \u201cYou\u2019re the one who caused all of this.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe gulped as he regained his breath again after the dousing with water. \u201cI told you it weren\u2019t my fault!\u201d he protested.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cOf course it\u2019s not your fault,\u201d Ben said soothingly as he worked the gel thoroughly into Joe\u2019s hair. \u201cThese things just happen.\u201d He stepped back and looked at the boy critically. Joe\u2019s hair was decidedly green and stuck out in all angles. \u201cThat should do it,\u201d he said. \u201cNow I\u2019m going upstairs to help Hop Sing with the linen. I\u2019ll be back to do my hair when we\u2019ve got everything boiling.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n As his father left the room, Joe sat down on a stool opposite Adam and poked his tongue out at his brother. \u201cYou stink,\u201d Joe said rudely.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cSo do you,\u201d retorted Adam calmly. \u201cProbably twice as bad as I do.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n The two brothers both crossed their arms over their chests and sat scowling at each other for a full minute in silence. \u201cYou smell worse than that time Hoss got sprayed by the skunk,\u201d Joe said finally, considering this the worst insult he could give.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam opened his mouth to make a retort, but at that moment the kitchen door opened and Hoss entered the room. His eyes bulged at the sight of his two brothers sitting facing each other with their hair stuck out in all directions with the green gel. \u201cDon\u2019t you bother to look like that,\u201d said Adam, before his brother could say a word. \u201cYou\u2019ll be getting this stuff in your hair too.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Hoss shrugged as he grinned at the sight of his siblings. \u201cNah!\u201d he said casually. \u201cI think I\u2019ll stick to the lye soap. Sides,\u201d he added. \u201cI don\u2019t mind a few nits.\u201d He took his hat off and scratched his head again. \u201cSeems to me that it ain\u2019t worth getting rid of em nohow. Soon as they\u2019re gone they usually come back again. I don\u2019t know what all the fuss is about.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cHmph!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n They all turned at the sound and Hoss gulped guiltily as he noticed Hop Sing standing behind him, his arms full of bed linen and towels. \u201cYou wash hair!\u201d the man said, scowling at Hoss. \u201cHop Sing have clean house and not have dirty hair ruin!\u201d He dumped the towels and sheets in the large copper that was boiling away in the corner and began to stir them vigorously with a long stick.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cCause I will,\u201d Hoss assured him quickly. \u201cI didn\u2019t mean nothing by that Hop Sing.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cBoy bring dirty bugs into house,\u201d Hop Sing continued to mutter as if he hadn\u2019t heard the comment. He glared at Joe and pointed his finger at him. \u201cYou not bring again!\u201d he instructed him. \u201cMake too much work for Hop Sing!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe gave the housekeeper an indignant look. \u201cI didn\u2019t mean to!\u201d he declared.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Hop Sing reached out to hit him on the side of the head, but one look at the green-gelled hair made him withdraw it quickly. \u201cHmph!\u201d he said again in replace of a reply and continued to stir the linen as he uttered a string of Chinese words and phrases under his breath.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n The three boys looked at each other and rolled their eyes, for they were well used to Hop Sing\u2019s utterances.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cWhat\u2019s for supper Hop Sing?\u201d asked Hoss innocently and immediately regretted his remark as Hop Sing spun on his heels to face him.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cHop Sing have no time cook supper!\u201d he shouted at the young man. \u201cToo much washing!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Hoss took a step backwards towards the wall and gave the cook a sad look. \u201cNot even leftovers?\u201d he asked hopefully.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019ll make supper,\u201d volunteered Ben as he entered the room, his arms also full of bed linen. \u201cWhere do you want these, Hop Sing?\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Hop Sing motioned to a basket in the corner of the room. \u201cHop Sing go back Old China if little boy bring bugs into clean house one more time!\u201d he warned them all. \u201cToo much work!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben sighed as he fingered first Joe\u2019s sticky hair and then Adam\u2019s. \u201cNow, now Hop Sing,\u201d he said in the same weary tone he reserved for such occasions. \u201cLet\u2019s just all relax about it. It can\u2019t be helped.\u201d He picked up a comb and began to pull it through Joe\u2019s curls, wiping it on a piece of cloth after each pull. \u201cThis stuff really seems to be working,\u201d he said, peering at the towel.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cLet me see!\u201d said Joe, excitedly, as he peered at the sticky mass on the towel. \u201cHey! I can see lots of em on there dead!\u201d he said. \u201cLook Adam!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam drew back and gave his brother a distasteful look. \u201cNo thank you,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cYou look just like old Jonesy \u2026. I mean Miss Jones,\u201d Joe corrected himself as he caught the look in his father\u2019s eye. \u201cShe don\u2019t like nits neither.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cWell for once I agree with her,\u201d said Adam as he also picked up a comb and began to run it through his own hair. \u201cI\u2019m just sorry that people have to know about this.\u201d He glared at Joe again. \u201cEveryone in town will probably know by now that the Cartwrights have nits.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cEveryone in town probably already has em themselves,\u201d said Hoss casually as he helped himself to an apple.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cWash your hair,\u201d ordered Ben, looking at his middle over his shoulder as he continued to work on Joe\u2019s hair. Hoss shrugged and took the bottle that Hop Sing held out to him, before beginning to roll up his sleeves.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cAre you gonna do your hair too, Hop Sing?\u201d asked Joe curiously. When the man answered in the affirmative, his eyes lit up. \u201cCan I watch?\u201d he asked excitedly. \u201cWhat?\u201d he said in an aggrieved tone as his father hit him on the back smartly. \u201cI was just asking?\u201d he added defensively. \u201cI ain\u2019t never seen Hop Sing\u2019s plait out before.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cIs called queue,\u201d said Hop Sing in a proud tone as he corrected the boy.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cYeah?\u201d said Joe. \u201cWhy do you wear it so long Hop Sing? How come you got a plait \u2026 I mean \u2026 a queue?\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cTo honour ancestors,\u201d replied Hop Sing.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cHuh?\u201d said Joe, genuinely puzzled as what the man meant by this remark.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cJoseph, that is enough,\u201d interrupted Ben. \u201cHop Sing\u2019s hair is his own affair. You just concentrate on your own.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cYeah,\u201d agreed Adam as he pulled the comb through his own dark locks. \u201cMake sure you get them all out Pa, or he\u2019ll still be contagious.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cWhat\u2019s contagious<\/em> mean?\u201d asked Joe, turning his attention to Adam. \u201cOw! That hurts Pa!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cWell, stop moving your head,\u201d instructed his father. \u201cKeep still.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cAll this fuss over a few nits,\u201d muttered Joe. \u201cThey were just minding their own business in my hair. They weren\u2019t hurting no-one.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam rolled his eyes. \u201cThey\u2019re filthy,\u201d he said. \u201cYou should be ashamed of having them.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cThat will do!\u201d said Ben, pointing the comb in Adam\u2019s direction. \u201cIt\u2019s not his fault.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cYeah,\u201d said Joe smugly, poking his tongue out at Adam. \u201cIt ain\u2019t my fault!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cAnd you be quiet too,\u201d said his father, giving Joe\u2019s hair one last tug. \u201cNow let\u2019s wash this muck out of your hair.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cIs not muck!\u201d said Hop Sing indignantly as he continued to stir the linen. \u201cIs good medicine for killing bugs.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben nodded as he waited for Hoss to step aside from the tub and then pushed Joe\u2019s head over it. \u201cI know, I know,\u201d he said, picking up a bucket of water and throwing it over his son\u2019s hair. \u201cOld Chinese remedy.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cLet me get in there Pa,\u201d said Adam, trying to get near the tub. \u201cI need to get this stuff out of my hair.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben stepped aside and began to towel Joe\u2019s hair dry as he watched Hoss distastefully coat his hair with the green gel. \u201cWork it right in and then let it dry,\u201d he said, while behind him Adam poured bucket after bucket of water over his head. \u201cSteady on there son,\u201d said Ben, turning to look at him and dragging Joe with him as he continued to rub the child\u2019s hair. \u201cOne bucket should be enough to rinse it out.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m not taking any chances,\u201d replied Adam as he picked up a towel. \u201cThat stuff stinks.\u201d He gave Hop Sing an apologetic look, but the housekeeper simply glared back at him. \u201cNo offence Hop Sing,\u201d he added lamely as he realised what he\u2019d said.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cPa! You\u2019re gonna rub my hair all off!\u201d complained Little Joe from underneath the towel. Ben stopped rubbing and picked up a clean comb to attack his son\u2019s head with. Ben stopped rubbing and picked up a comb to pull through the child\u2019s hair. \u201cHey Pa?\u201d said Joe, suddenly. \u201cDo nits go on any hair?\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben frowned as he worked. \u201cYes,\u201d he said. \u201cAlthough I\u2019m not sure what you mean by that.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe looked up at his father. \u201cI mean \u2026. They don\u2019t just live in hair on ya head, do they? Can they live in hair all over your body?\u201d He gave his father a questioning look, as did Hoss. Adam stopped combing his hair and also stared at his father.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cWell now,\u201d said Ben, considering the question. \u201cThat\u2019s something I\u2019ve not been asked before. To be honest son \u2026.\u201d He nearly choked with laughter at the appalled look on Adam\u2019s face as he spoke, but caught himself just in time. \u201cI think they just live in the hair on your head,\u201d he finished.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cThat\u2019s good,\u201d said Joe. \u201cCause Adam and Hoss and you would have to put that gel stuff on your chests too then, wouldn\u2019t ya?\u201d He pulled his shirt away from his neck and glanced down on his own small chest. \u201cNuthin down there for me to worry bout yet but.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam\u2019s eyes nearly popped out of his head as he considered his brother\u2019s remarks. \u201cAre you \u2026.\u201d He swallowed. \u201cAre you sure about that Pa?\u201d he asked tentatively. \u201cI mean, if they do live in \u2026. Um \u2026 other areas \u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Ben tried not to smile at his son\u2019s obvious distress. \u201cI\u2019m fairly sure son,\u201d he said. \u201cYou\u2019ll just have to keep an eye on things, I suppose.\u201d Adam\u2019s face went bright red and he thoughtfully began to comb his hair again. \u201cWell that\u2019s you finished,\u201d said Ben brightly, tapping Joe on the head with the comb. \u201cI defy anyone to find any nits in there now.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe fingered his shorn head mournfully. \u201cPoor nits,\u201d he said. \u201cWell at least I get time off school,\u201d he added, on a happier note. \u201cMiss Jones said not to come back for a few days.\u201d He grinned at his father happily.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cYou\u2019ll be back at school tomorrow as usual,\u201d said his father firmly. \u201cThere\u2019s no need for you to stay at home now that the nits are gone. I\u2019ll send a letter to Miss Jones to that effect.\u201d He motioned to Hoss. \u201cCome over here and rinse that stuff out of your hair now.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe opened his mouth in protest. \u201cBut that ain\u2019t fair!\u201d he said indignantly. \u201cMiss Jones don\u2019t want me back tomorrow. She said so!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t blame her,\u201d said Adam, ignoring the dark look his father gave him at the remark.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t care,\u201d said Ben firmly as he tipped a bucket of water over Hoss\u2019 head. \u201cYou\u2019re going back and that\u2019s and end to it Joseph. The nits are gone and there\u2019s no need not to go to school. Now go and sit outside in the sunshine and dry your hair.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cBut what about all the fishing I was gonna do?\u201d protested Joe, standing his ground.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cThere\u2019ll be no fishing Joseph,\u201d said Ben, handing Hoss a towel. \u201cNow get!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe gave his father one last scowl before walking to the door of the kitchen. \u201cAin\u2019t fair,\u201d he mumbled under his breath as he opened the door. \u201cA fellar gets nits and he don\u2019t even get a day off school. Ain\u2019t fair!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cAdam, Hoss, go and dry your hair outside as well. I need to get mine done and Hop Sing needs the space to get on with his washing.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam stood up, still looking somewhat nonplussed at his previous conversation. \u201cSure thing Pa,\u201d said Hoss, grabbing a couple of apples as he left the room.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Outside, Joe was sitting on the edge of the water trough, his face in his hands and one boot kicking at the dirt. \u201cAin\u2019t fair!\u201d he was still muttering under his breath.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam sat down on one side of him, while Hoss sat on the other. \u201cLife\u2019s tough shortshanks,\u201d said Hoss, happily biting into one of his apples.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cYeah,\u201d agreed Joe, still kicking at the dirt. \u201cRotten old school again tomorrow. I can just hear old Jonesy talking now.\u201d\u00a0 He put his hands over his ears as if he could, in fact, hear the teacher speaking.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Hoss nodded in sympathy. \u201cAnd no good supper tonight,\u201d he added. \u201cPa\u2019s cooking sure ain\u2019t like Hop Sing\u2019s.\u201d He put his hands over his mouth as if he could taste it then and there.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam was silent, still coming to terms with the fact that the nits might be right at this moment finding other hairy places on his body to settle. As soon as his head was dry, he was determined to check it out in the privacy of his bedroom. He shuddered to think of what he might find and put his hands over his eyes as if he shield them from the offending nits that might be lurking on his chest, his arms, his legs, his \u2026. He shuddered again.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n The three brothers sat thus for a full minute, Adam\u2019s hands over his eyes, Hoss\u2019 over his mouth and Joe\u2019s over his ears as they were each lost in their own miserable thoughts. After the minute\u2019s silence, Hoss put his head up and stared at Joe curiously, then slowly he put his hand out and picked something from the boy\u2019s hair. \u201cHey lookee here,\u201d he said, wonderingly. \u201cI guess Hop Sing\u2019s remedy weren\u2019t so great after all.\u201d He showed them the small crushed insect on his thumb.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cAnother nit!\u201d said Joe happily and then looked accusingly at Hoss. \u201cDid ya have to kill it?\u201d he said. \u201cHey Hoss \u2026. Look again \u2026. Are there any more there?\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Hoss looked. \u201cI can see a couple,\u201d he said. \u201cYou want me to take em out for ya Joe?\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe pulled his head away instantly. \u201cNo way!\u201d he shouted. \u201cYou leave em alone Hoss! If I\u2019m lucky there will be more by morning and then I\u2019ll get tomorrow off school after all.\u201d He grinned at both his brothers. \u201cI knew this was gonna be a good day,\u201d he said happily. \u201cHow lucky can a feller get? Two lots of nits in one day!\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Hoss shrugged. \u201cWell, I\u2019m gonna go and check out those mares. Coming Joe? Coming Adam?\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Joe bounced off the water trough, all his previous woes forgotten. \u201cSure thing Hoss,\u201d he said. \u201cAnd maybe if I\u2019m lucky I\u2019ll get a few more nits from in the barn too.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cWell one sure thing,\u201d added Hoss as he also stood up. \u201cThe horses sure don\u2019t mind iffen we\u2019ve got a few nits. They\u2019re not like people.\u201d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Adam watched as his two brothers walked towards the barn, feeling that somehow it just didn\u2019t seem worth his while to protest. Thoughts of the refined society that he\u2019d left behind in Boston back east flitted across his mind and he sighed as he considered just how far he was from such things. \u201cWelcome home Adam,\u201d he said sarcastically under his breath. \u201cGee, it\u2019s great to be here again!\u201d With a deep sigh he stood up and turned towards the house.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Summary:\u00a0 Little Joe brings some unwanted guests to The Ponderosa and causes trouble for everyone.The End<\/h1>\n
\nRating:\u00a0 G\u00a0 (6,600 words)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":12,"featured_media":383,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"template-full-width-post.php","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_members_access_role":[],"_members_access_error":""},"categories":[23,4,1007,30],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-65400","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-drama","category-humor","category-joe-cartwright","category-prequels","wpcat-23-id","wpcat-4-id","wpcat-1007-id","wpcat-30-id"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/02\/coming-soon-9.jpg?fit=320%2C240&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/65400","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/12"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=65400"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/65400\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/383"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=65400"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=65400"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=65400"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}