{"id":65505,"date":"2026-07-31T13:04:03","date_gmt":"2026-07-31T17:04:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=65505"},"modified":"2026-08-24T02:48:48","modified_gmt":"2026-08-24T06:48:48","slug":"no-place-that-far-by-wrangler","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=65505","title":{"rendered":"No Place That Far (by Wrangler)"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Summary: Little Joe hides the fact that he hurt his head in a fall, leaving everyone wondering why his behavior has changed.\u00a0 Upset by his actions, Joe leaves home forcing his family to find him before time runs out. Rating T, WC 34,347<\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center\"><strong>No Place That Far<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>*I can\u2019t imagine any greater fear than waking up without you here.\u00a0 And though the sun would still shine on, my whole world would all be gone.\u00a0 But not for long.\u00a0 If I had to run, if I had to crawl.\u00a0 If I had to swim a hundred rivers just to climb a thousand walls.\u00a0 Always know that I would find a way to get to where you are.\u00a0 There\u2019s no place that far. * (Song, No Place That Far. Lyrics by Sara Evans.)<\/p>\n<p>It was the worst headache I\u2019d had in my life, and it just wouldn\u2019t go away.\u00a0 But I should\u2019ve figured out what was causing all that pain and why it hurt just to blink after the kind of fall I had taken.\u00a0 Of course, I didn\u2019t bother to tell anyone the way that I had landed or the fact that the back of my skull had made a loud cracking sound when I hit that rock inside the breaking corral.\u00a0 I just decided to keep my mouth shut about it.\u00a0 That meant not mentioning it to Hoss, nor Adam and of course not my father!\u00a0 Pa would\u2019ve railed on and on about the fact that I take too many risks. Then somehow the conversation would circle around to the fall that my mother had taken which ended her life and in some ways my pa\u2019s too.\u00a0 So, I just kept my stupid mouth shut and shook the dust from my chaps.\u00a0 I even had them saddle the next bronc for me as I forced a conceited smile pretending that I knew what I was doing.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t.\u00a0 In hindsight I wish I had said something to someone.\u00a0 I had so many chances later that night at the dinner table when just the smell of Hop Sing\u2019s roast almost made me lose the little bit of water I had gotten down.\u00a0 I willed it all away but then the noise started.\u00a0 It was so subtle at first that I thought maybe Hop Sing had his tea kettle on the stove.\u00a0 That was before it grew louder.\u00a0 I stared back and forth between my father and brothers and wondered why they had to talk like they were shouting across a saloon full of rowdy cowhands.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t know at the time that they were talking in their usual tone and that it was apparently all in my head.\u00a0 Pa kept asking me something, but I didn\u2019t understand one word that he had said.\u00a0 I just nodded my head and hoped that was the right answer that he wanted from me.\u00a0 It was about at that time that the sickness I felt in the pit of my stomach grew worse.\u00a0 But I knew that if I jumped up and ran outside to puke that at least three or four people would be trailing right behind me and all of them wanting to know what was wrong.\u00a0 So, I held it all in.\u00a0 I just pushed the food around my plate but none of it ended up in my mouth. But that wasn\u2019t anything new. My family was used to me not eating much, especially if I was tired.\u00a0 So that\u2019s what I told them as I stood from the table and excused myself.\u00a0 I knew what was going to happen just as soon as everyone was done eating and I was right.\u00a0 Pa was up in my room asking a dozen questions and fussing over me.\u00a0 Of course, I appreciated his concern, but the tone of his voice seemed awfully loud.\u00a0 I couldn\u2019t say anything about it, or he\u2019d have looked at me even odder than he had done as he grew closer to the head of the bed.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoseph?\u00a0 You sure you\u2019re alright?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSure, Pa \u2013 just tired like I told you downstairs.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben stared at his son and dropped a hand onto his shoulder to force his attention and to make Joe look his way.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI don\u2019t know \u2013 something about your face doesn\u2019t look quite right to me.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>I was sitting back against the headboard purposely avoiding lying flat on my back in case I had to make a run for the basin.\u00a0 Pa just kept his position, hovering over me like he usually did.\u00a0 I used to think it was because I was his youngest, but I\u2019ve learned in my seventeen years that he\u2019d probably have acted that same way even if I wasn\u2019t.\u00a0 I\u2019m not complaining about it.\u00a0 I loved him for caring so much, especially that night, awful as I felt.\u00a0 But did he have to make so much noise?<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLean back, I want to have a look at you,\u201d Pa insisted unwilling to take no for an answer.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>*** Oh, please God, don\u2019t let him give me the once over!\u00a0 If he starts poking and prodding me, I know I\u2019m going to throw up.\u00a0 Then the next thing I know I\u2019ll be staring up at both Pa and Doc Martin! ***<\/em><\/strong> I thought and worried about what would happen if he forced me to lie flat on my back.\u00a0 I was barely holding onto the water I had drunk when I got up to my room.\u00a0\u00a0 I just knew that I\u2019d lose it if I was forced to move.\u00a0 On top of that my father\u2019s voice just grew louder and if it weren\u2019t for his concerned demeanor I\u2019d have sworn he was about to threaten me.\u00a0 It had the same tone he always used when he suggested that the two of us needed to go to the barn.\u00a0 That\u2019s how loud his voice seemed to me at the time.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cC\u2019mon, Pa \u2013 I told you \u2013 I\u2019m just tired.\u201d\u00a0 I appreciated the fact that my Pa was worried about me and was being his usual overly protective self, but he was making everything worse in my humble opinion.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoseph,\u201d Ben returned and gave the boy a slight push to make him do as he had been instructed.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Now this is where my story turns dark.\u00a0 Well, it was already dark, but this part is darker still.\u00a0 There\u2019s no one in my life that I love more than my father.\u00a0 I would die for him; he means that much to me.\u00a0 So, that said \u2013 I don\u2019t exactly know what happened next.\u00a0 Oh, I heard about it alright.\u00a0 Both Hoss and Adam went after me hard and we almost came to blows over it.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t believe one word that either of them said to me that night.\u00a0 But then again, since everything from that point on was a hazy gray blur to me, there was a good chance that they weren\u2019t lying.\u00a0 That\u2019s the part that made me feel even worse than I already felt up to that point.\u00a0 The blinding headache, the nausea and the God-awful loud noises were bad enough, but I\u2019d take them any day over what I apparently did that night.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Adam and Hoss looked towards the top of the stairs when they heard a loud crash above them and hurried to find out what had happened.\u00a0 By the time they made it into Little Joe\u2019s bedroom they saw their father lying on the floor.\u00a0 He wasn\u2019t moving and his face was filled with stunned confusion as he looked up at the boy who still had his left hand balled up into a fist standing over him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJust what the heck is going on?\u201d Adam demanded and went down on one knee to help pull his father up.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m alright, Boys,\u201d Ben insisted, still numb over what had happened.\u00a0 He made it to his feet and shook himself from the shock of having taken a good strong punch from his youngest son.\u00a0 Ben hadn\u2019t been expecting the move, so he didn\u2019t have the opportunity to block Little Joe\u2019s throw.\u00a0 The suddenness of Joe\u2019s left fist hitting its intended target had caused him to hit the floor hard.<\/p>\n<p>Hoss noticed the red splotch spreading across his father\u2019s right cheek, and it wasn\u2019t too hard to guess how it had gotten there.\u00a0 It was obvious what I had done.<\/p>\n<p>Yeah, the left-handed me and the bruise starting to form on the right side of Pa\u2019s face.\u00a0 I was guilty as charged without a trial nor any remembrance of sending that punch which had knocked my father down onto the floor.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLittle Brother, you\u2019d better hope that ain\u2019t from you!\u201d Hoss shouted and indicated his father\u2019s face.\u00a0 His hand automatically formed into a fist as he moved closer to Joe\u2019s bed.<\/p>\n<p>From what I was told I just stood there and didn\u2019t say anything.\u00a0\u00a0 I don\u2019t remember that but then again, I don\u2019t remember striking my father either.\u00a0 Adam later told me that I was lucky because both he and Hoss were about to pull me limb from limb, but Pa had forced them to leave the room.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou stay up here, Joseph.\u00a0 You and I are going to discuss all this after I\u2019ve tended to my cheek,\u201d Ben announced, the fingers of his right hand touching his injury.\u00a0 He simply turned without another word being said and walked out of the room with my two brothers following in his wake.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>So that\u2019s the way I was told that it all went down that night.\u00a0 I had heard it from Pa, Hoss and Adam so I guess it\u2019s a sure bet that\u2019s exactly what I had done.\u00a0 I don\u2019t care how bad my head was hurting or how much I wanted to ask Pa to just stop talking, I never would have raised my hand to him.\u00a0 But they said I did \u2013 so I\u2019ve got to accept that.\u00a0 I\u2019d rather drink poison than to have that one over my head for the rest of my life!\u00a0 I\u2019m just glad I don\u2019t remember doing it or I could never face anyone ever again.\u00a0 There\u2019s a good chance that I still won\u2019t be able to face anyone after having raised a hand to my father.\u00a0 My brothers and I have had our share of scuffles, and we\u2019ve come to blows with each other a time or two.\u00a0 But no one ever \u2013 and I mean ever \u2013 hits Pa!\u00a0 As Hop Sing would say that one\u2019s \u201ccarved in jade\u201d.\u00a0 It\u2019s an unspoken rule and in hindsight I don\u2019t blame any of them for the way I was treated after it happened.\u00a0 If Adam or Hoss had knocked Pa to the floor I probably would have shot them.\u00a0 Maybe now it makes complete sense how I feel about myself and how I\u2019m sure they all feel about me too.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>\u201cHe\u2019s sick,\u201d Ben protested as he sank down into the blue winged back chair and held the cloth that Hop Sing had filled with chipped ice to his cheek.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m not going to go up there and do anything to him if he\u2019s not well.\u00a0 And furthermore, I don\u2019t want either of you to lay one finger on that boy.\u00a0 Understood?\u201d Pa insisted as he shot a glance over at his two older boys who stood in front of the fireplace fuming inside.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI don\u2019t care if he\u2019s sick, Pa!\u201d Hoss fired back.\u00a0 He loved his little brother but there was only so much he could tolerate and Joe had crossed the line that night.\u00a0 Knowing the kid had struck their father wasn\u2019t something he could just overlook.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSo, he\u2019s sick,\u201d Adam began and took a seat on top of the coffee table opposite his father.\u00a0 \u201cDoes that give that boy the right to haul off and hit you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben reached his right hand out for the glass of brandy that Hop Sing had given him when he\u2019d brought the ice pack in earlier.\u00a0 Adam handed it over to him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoseph is a lot of things.\u00a0 He\u2019s got a bad temper, and he doesn\u2019t take the time to think things through before reacting.\u00a0 But he would never hit me.\u00a0 I\u2019m sure of it, just like I\u2019m sure that neither of you would do that.\u00a0 Now, I don\u2019t exactly know what\u2019s wrong with him \u2013 but there\u2019s something that caused him to throw that punch.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa,\u201d Adam began and chose his words carefully.\u00a0 He knew how his father felt about the boy upstairs.\u00a0 The kid had been in and out of trouble ever since he wasn\u2019t much older than a toddler.\u00a0 Pa had always forgiven the boy no matter what.\u00a0 Adam believed that his father was giving Joe the benefit of the doubt just because he was the youngest.\u00a0 Pa always had a soft spot as far as the boy was concerned just because he knew there wouldn\u2019t be any other children to raise once Little Joe was grown up.\u00a0 Ben clung on to him a little tighter because of it.\u00a0 \u201cJoe &#8212; whether he is sick or not &#8212; knew what he was doing.\u00a0 He let that temper of his loose on you.\u00a0 Can you blame Hoss and me for wanting to go up there and give him a piece of what he just gave you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben\u2019s gaze went back and forth between the two angry young men in front of him and tried to ease the tension mounting by the minute.\u00a0 He could just imagine what one or both of them could do to their little brother if he were to allow them to go and have it out with him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI understand the way that you two feel.\u00a0 I appreciate that you both are protective of me.\u00a0 But I\u2019m telling you that something is wrong with your brother.\u00a0 And if he really is sick then how would you feel afterwards if you made whatever is wrong with him worse by raising your hand to him?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThen let us just go and talk with him, Pa,\u201d Hoss jumped into the conversation.\u00a0 \u201cWe\u2019ll find out if he\u2019s sick or not.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo,\u201d Ben stated adamantly.\u00a0 \u201cLet\u2019s just let the situation cool down for a little while and then I\u2019ll be the one to confront Joseph.\u00a0 If he isn\u2019t sick then it will be me \u2013 and only me, who will decide how best to handle what the boy did tonight.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam and Hoss exchanged a disappointed glance and shook their heads over their father\u2019s stubborn refusal to let them deal with Little Joe.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay, Pa,\u201d Adam sighed, giving up on trying to change his father\u2019s mind.\u00a0 Pa was even more stubborn than the ornery cuss who was in deep trouble now.\u00a0 \u201cBut, if he\u2019s not sick then the two of us are going to have a talk with him once you\u2019re done.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo fighting, is that clear?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, Sir,\u201d Adam nodded.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHoss?\u201d Ben turned his attention on the big man who still appeared enraged over the situation.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, Sir,\u201d he conceded with a frown.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAlright then let\u2019s all settle down.\u00a0 I\u2019m going to let things cool off for a while and then go up there,\u201d Ben stated firmly and then eased back into his chair.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>I don\u2019t know how I managed to pack up my saddlebags and a few belongings hurting the way that I was.\u00a0 I guess it must come from the nights I\u2019ve spent out watching the herd.\u00a0 I\u2019ve learned to pack up and get out there in case there\u2019s trouble or if we\u2019re shorthanded.\u00a0 I\u2019ve done that a lot.\u00a0 But this time the trouble wasn\u2019t with those loco steers it was with me.\u00a0 I did manage to throw up at least a few times and felt better for it.\u00a0 On top of the headache and nausea now I had a huge cramp in my stomach.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t there due to whatever the hell was going on with my head either.\u00a0 It was there because I\u2019d hurt my pa.\u00a0 I had witnessed the redness on Pa\u2019s face, but it wasn\u2019t until after they had all left my room that I looked at the knuckles on my left hand.\u00a0 I knew that I had used them on Pa.\u00a0 I guess that\u2019s when my stomach started hurting and I decided to pack up my things.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t want to face anyone.\u00a0 I couldn\u2019t stomach the idea of seeing the looks on Hoss or Adam\u2019s faces.\u00a0 But worst of all I couldn\u2019t face Pa.\u00a0 How could I?\u00a0 I had hit him for no real reason.\u00a0 Well even if there had been a real reason, if I\u2019d been in my right mind I\u2019d never even have thought about raising my hand to my father.\u00a0 I wondered if he\u2019d gotten so loud that I had blindly flailed out my hand just to make the noise stop.\u00a0 No matter what had triggered the event, the thought of my father coming up to my room to confront me scared me.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t because Pa might really let me have it.\u00a0 Lord knows he had every right to do that!\u00a0 No, it was because I\u2019d have to look at the face that had borne the brunt of my rage.\u00a0 I hurriedly threw everything that I thought I might need inside my bedroll, including the money I had stashed in my bureau.\u00a0 I had been saving up for Pa\u2019s birthday which was only a month away.\u00a0 Now I figured that the best thing that I could give him as a gift was a life without me around.\u00a0 Pa deserved a better son than he had gotten.<\/p>\n<p>I was relieved that no one heard me as I quietly made my way down the back stairs like I\u2019ve been doing since I was old enough to walk.\u00a0 It was how I made my escape to freedom as a kid.\u00a0 But now I was slithering away like someone who had stayed too long at a party and everyone\u2019s happy to see them get their hat and leave.\u00a0 But it\u2019s not their fault \u2013 my family that is.\u00a0 Why would they even want me around anyhow?\u00a0 I\u2019ve been nothing but trouble for my Pa and my brothers.\u00a0 It\u2019s not like I\u2019ve tried to get into all the predicaments that I always find myself to be in.\u00a0 Maybe I was born under a bad star or something?\u00a0 I could hear Adam and his Shakespeare nonsense.\u00a0 He\u2019d once recited to me \u201cthe fault lies not within the stars but within ourselves.\u201d\u00a0 I guess that means it is all my fault after all.\u00a0 Anyway, I made it out of the house and skirted the back of the kitchen undetected.\u00a0 Then I stealthily walked through the tree line and finally entered the barn.\u00a0 I was glad that it was both dark and quiet in there.\u00a0 I had that going for me because my head throbbed and everything that I had taken into my body since that fall had already come right back out.\u00a0 Cochise cooperated as though she knew why I was leaving.\u00a0 I cast a wary glance towards the porch.\u00a0 The light was still lit, which meant no one had gone to bed yet, which was a good thing.\u00a0 It gave me more time to get away from the house.\u00a0 I\u2019m sure that they were huddled up around the fireplace discussing what to do with me.\u00a0 They won\u2019t need to worry about that now.<\/p>\n<p>I walked Cochise around the barn, afraid that if I tried to ride her someone might hear.\u00a0 My thoughts were muddled and it was hard to decide where I should head off to and which direction to turn my horse.\u00a0 I finally decided and managed to kick Cochise hard enough to bring her up to a canter instead of riding her at my usual breakneck speed.\u00a0 Yeah, she knew what was expected of her.\u00a0 I was good with horses, just not rocks, I guess.\u00a0 I was lucky there was a full moon which would afford just enough light to take me away from the ranch house.\u00a0 The thought had occurred to me that I should leave Nevada altogether, but I couldn\u2019t.\u00a0 My head throbbed and every sound was magnified as I rode onward.\u00a0 Though I\u2019d always loved listening to the way that the wind blew through the pines, suddenly hearing it was so deafening that I was beginning to hate living so far back in the woods.\u00a0 It was a moot point now since I wouldn\u2019t be calling the Ponderosa home any longer. \u00a0Trying to take my mind off my head aching I stared down at my friend.\u00a0 Cochise was a smart horse alright.\u00a0 When I began to slump a bit in my saddle, she automatically adjusted her stride.\u00a0 I\u2019m glad that she did that as the last thing I needed was to fall off a horse again.<\/p>\n<p>And so, it was with great thought that I decided to leave the Ponderosa.\u00a0 Well, not so great as I couldn\u2019t hold a rational thought in my head anymore.\u00a0 At some point I pulled back on the reins and then I spun my horse around in a complete circle.\u00a0 It was as if I couldn\u2019t tell up from down for a few minutes.\u00a0 Anyway, I finally got my bearings well enough to choose that remote cabin on the outskirts of the ranch as my destination.\u00a0 It was in ill repair, but it would do the trick since I doubted that anyone would find me up there.\u00a0 Well, not that I believed that anyone would go looking for me after what I had done.\u00a0 I couldn\u2019t blame them.\u00a0 It was bad enough that I was stuck with me, why should anyone else want that?\u00a0 But just the same, I didn\u2019t want to see anybody anyway.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t just a matter of being ashamed of what I had done to my father, though that was the larger of the two reasons.\u00a0 Every time I thought about having knocked my Pa to the floor my stomach seized up again.\u00a0 Dear Lord why did I do that?\u00a0 I guess I\u2019ll never know.\u00a0 I felt even worse now because instead of facing Pa I was turning tail and running off like some little kid.\u00a0 I should have stayed long enough to be dressed down and punished by my father for what I had done.\u00a0 But there wasn\u2019t anything I could have said in my defense.\u00a0 Not only didn\u2019t I remember doing it, but I had absolutely no idea why it happened.\u00a0 And Pa would\u2019ve been very vocal about how he felt about me and I just couldn\u2019t handle that.\u00a0 My head hurt too much.\u00a0 Maybe someday I\u2019ll write him a letter and apologize?\u00a0 Anyway, the second reason why I had chosen that secluded cabin was because I didn\u2019t want any noise.\u00a0 And people come with noise, that\u2019s a fact.\u00a0 So, with the plan as to where we were going decided, we were soon heading in the right direction.\u00a0 I just patted Cochise\u2019s neck and told her my plan.\u00a0 Most folks think I\u2019m crazy to put so much stock in a horse but mine is smarter than half of the people that I know.\u00a0 She just senses things &#8212; especially things about me.\u00a0 I\u2019m not her master, never was.\u00a0 We are partners, that sums it up the best way I know how.\u00a0 I feed her and take care of her needs. And to repay me she\u2019s constantly saved my life by bringing me back home even when I\u2019ve been injured.\u00a0 That\u2019s our agreement.\u00a0 We\u2019ve had it ever since I was twelve years old and my pa was gifted the horse by Chief Winnemucca.\u00a0 She was given to Pa so he could give her to me.\u00a0 That darn horse of mine.\u00a0 Our introduction was her pushing me headfirst into the creek there at the Paiute encampment.\u00a0 Cochise let me know who was in charge and it hasn\u2019t changed in five straight years.\u00a0 I love her and I think she sort of loves me.\u00a0 At least most of the time she does.\u00a0 My mind was all over the place as I drew closer to that old cabin and I hoped that I could make it there without falling out of my saddle.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>\u201cHe\u2019s not in his room.\u00a0 I went up there to call the little varmint down here like you said, Pa\u2014but he must\u2019ve escaped using the back stairs,\u201d Hoss announced as he descended the staircase.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGreat,\u201d Adam muttered, his anger kindled at his brother for dodging them all.\u00a0 He knew that Little Joe must\u2019ve run off to avoid the punishment that he so richly deserved as far as he was concerned.\u00a0 Adam and Hoss had discussed the situation between themselves when they were in the kitchen earlier to get the coffee that Hop Sing had made before retiring for the night.\u00a0 Neither man was happy with their father\u2019s decision to simply speak to Joe instead of hauling him out to the barn for a well-deserved \u201cnecessary talking to.\u201d\u00a0 \u201cGuess he\u2019s not all that sick, Pa.\u00a0 If he <strong><em>was,<\/em><\/strong> he couldn\u2019t have ridden off.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Drawing in a deep breath, Ben frowned and stood from his chair.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m going to get my gear together and go out looking for that youngster.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Hoss was quickly over to his father and placed a hand on his shoulder.\u00a0 \u201cPa, let us go out after him.\u00a0 You\u2019ve had a rough night.\u00a0 Why don\u2019t you just rest?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHoss,\u201d Ben shook his head and grinned knowingly over at his middle boy.\u00a0 It was very easy to see that his son was upset over what had transpired and that he was being a bit overly protective of his father in true Cartwright fashion.\u00a0 Ben had to admit that all his sons had learned that trait from him. \u201cI took one punch from your little brother.\u00a0 Yes, it caught me by surprise \u2013 which was why I fell.\u00a0 But I\u2019d hardly say that I had a rough night.\u00a0 Or do you think that your old man can\u2019t handle one unexpected left-handed jab to my face?\u201d Ben forced his gaze on Hoss, letting him know that he was okay and that he was determined to go after Joe.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAlright,\u201d Adam jumped into the mix with his own suggestion.\u00a0 \u201cLet\u2019s all go then.\u00a0 If we don\u2019t find the kid right away, we can split up and cover more area.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Pursing his lips and dropping his head a bit as he considered Adam\u2019s reasoning, Ben finally nodded.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOn one condition,\u201d he said and looked back and forth between his sons.\u00a0 \u201cIf we do have to break up and go in different directions \u2013 and if either one of you finds Joseph, then I want your word that you\u2019re not going to do anything to him.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam and Hoss exchanged glances and frowns over their father\u2019s orders.\u00a0 Both men wanted to take care of Little Joe\u2019s attitude problem and to show him that what he had done that night wouldn\u2019t be tolerated.\u00a0 If that meant that they had to use physical force, then so be it.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWell?\u201d Ben asked when neither of his sons responded to his demands.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAgreed \u2013 right, Hoss?\u201d Adam turned and looked up at his brother and tried to signal to him to go along with the plan just to ease their father\u2019s mind.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSure, Pa \u2013 I won\u2019t do nothing to him \u2013 even though he\u2019s got it coming,\u201d Hoss nodded his head and clapped his father on the back.\u00a0 He was trying hard to hide his anger and it hadn\u2019t been easy.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNow listen,\u201d Ben paused and placed a hand on both of his son\u2019s shoulders.\u00a0 \u201cDon\u2019t assume that Joseph isn\u2019t sick just because he rode out of here the way he did.\u00a0 I\u2019ve seen that boy riding Cochise when he was so sick that he could barely make it inside this house \u2013 and you both have too.\u00a0 Give him the benefit of the doubt, Boys.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The two brothers shared the same thoughts about Little Joe at that moment.\u00a0 They didn\u2019t care if the boy had an injury or some kind of ailment.\u00a0 As far as they were concerned Joe just flat out shouldn\u2019t have hit their father and that was that.\u00a0 But they also knew that the man who now stood sandwiched between them loved the boy; perhaps too much.\u00a0 Pa always gave Little Joe a pass when it came to misbehaving.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 They also knew that they wouldn\u2019t have been as lucky had they pulled the same kind of stunts that the boy had done in his seventeen years.\u00a0 But the situation was different this time, Little Joe had struck their father.\u00a0 In the kitchen they had made a pact that one or both of them would take care of their little brother if their father didn\u2019t come down on him hard for what he\u2019d done.<\/p>\n<p>Ben smiled for the first time in hours as he observed the looks going back and forth between his sons.\u00a0 \u201cBoys, I can hear the wheels spinning around in your heads.\u00a0 No, you are not going to dole out any kind of punishment to Joseph even if it turns out that he isn\u2019t sick.\u00a0 I\u2019m his father \u2013just the same as I\u2019m yours -and you both best remember that.\u00a0 Now go get bedrolls in case we need them and rouse Hop Sing, so he\u2019ll know where we\u2019re going.\u00a0 Ask him to get us up some grub to take along with us.\u00a0 I\u2019m going upstairs to get my things packed.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>And with those parting words Ben hurried up the stairs closing his final arguments so both men would know what he expected of them.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWish I\u2019d been born the youngest,\u201d Hoss fumed.\u00a0 \u201cThat boy has gotten out of more tannings than both of us combined.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam gave his brother a quick wink before going off to wake Hop Sing.\u00a0 \u201cNaw, it wouldn\u2019t have sounded right.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHuh?\u201d Hoss asked confused by his brother\u2019s statement.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cCalling you \u201cLittle\u201d Hoss \u2013 it just doesn\u2019t have a good ring to it.\u00a0 And besides that, you haven\u2019t been little since the day I held you right after your mother gave birth to you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Hoss chuckled and nodded, \u201cYeah, guess you\u2019re right!\u00a0 Okay I\u2019ll go saddle the horses.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The three Cartwrights soon had their gear and supplies ready and headed off to try to find Little Joe and bring him back kicking and screaming if necessary.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Well, I was right about that old cabin.\u00a0 No wonder why even passing vagrants didn\u2019t bother to hole up inside of it.\u00a0 It looked like it had begun to lean and the only thing plumb about it was the chimney.\u00a0 But it was a place where I was sure that I could find a bed and if not, surely the floor would do the trick.\u00a0 I just needed to close my eyes and get some rest.\u00a0 I wanted to be in a dark room away from any noise so maybe my darn head would stop throbbing.<\/p>\n<p>I took care of Cochise, per our agreement, and she whinnied to show me that she was satisfied with the oats I had packed in with my provisions.\u00a0 Then I turned her loose inside the small rope corral and grabbed all my gear.\u00a0 The place was dark and dreary, and I was thrilled with it.\u00a0 Swatting the cobwebs with my hand I looked around the sparsely furnished one room cabin.\u00a0 There was a bunk whose rope supports which, upon inspection of them, had mostly broken.\u00a0 I figured that there were more than enough still strung across it to accommodate me since I didn\u2019t weigh too much.\u00a0 I knew that if Hoss were there, he\u2019d end up falling through the thing.\u00a0 I tossed my gear at the end of the bunk and continued to inspect the place the best I could, having only one candle in my possession.\u00a0 There wasn\u2019t any whiskey squirreled away in the hopes of someone coming by for a visit.\u00a0 But that was fine by me.\u00a0 Just the thought of whiskey turned my stomach.\u00a0 I hadn\u2019t eaten since breakfast, but I was fine with that.\u00a0 My head hurt too much to think about it anyhow.\u00a0 The most I could do at that moment was to shake out the old motheaten blanket on the bunk and spread out on top of it.\u00a0 It was no International House Hotel, but it was dark and quiet and that\u2019s all I had ever asked for.<\/p>\n<p>Now the bad thing \u2013 aside for the fact that my head was killing me and that I was so queasy that I thought I\u2019d have the dry heaves soon, was what happened next.\u00a0 I had finally gotten comfortable and was content with the peace and quiet that had fallen over the room when it happened.\u00a0 Closing my eyes I could clearly see Pa\u2019s face, bruise and all, standing in my bedroom back at the house.\u00a0 He was standing there like he so often had right before letting loose on me.\u00a0 Pa was there with his hands on his hips and his eyes dark and penetrating as though they were already saying the words he was about to launch into. \u00a0I tried to will that image away only to then see the faces of my very angry-looking brothers.\u00a0 The two of them looked like they were getting ready to tear me apart.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cCut it out \u2013 leave me be, will you?\u201d I whispered hoping that all of the images would vanish.<\/p>\n<p>I shook my head and wondered why my life had suddenly gotten so out of control.\u00a0 This time I hadn\u2019t run towards trouble as in the past, yet it had shown up, nonetheless.\u00a0 I rolled onto my left side and tried to remember what Doc Martin had told me years ago.\u00a0 I had been having stomach pains, which to be perfectly honest were caused by a bottle of rotgut that I had hidden in my bedroom.\u00a0 But Pa thought I was sick and had Doc drop by to check me over.\u00a0 He suggested that sleeping on one side as opposed to the other helped with stomach pain.\u00a0 Bad thing was now I couldn\u2019t remember which side he told me was best.\u00a0 I was distracted back when Doc told me about \u201cthe whole sleeping on your side thing\u201d.\u00a0 My father had been nonchalantly looking around my bedroom, and I was terrified that I\u2019d been found out. \u00a0Yeah, Pa had figured out about that bottle because the next morning when I looked it was gone and in its place was a note from him.\u00a0 He let me know that I\u2019d be paying for Doc Martin\u2019s services from the previous day and that I\u2019d be getting over my ailment by the doubled number of chores he had left on the back of his note.\u00a0 Needless to say, I never hid rotgut ever again.\u00a0 But I sure wished that I could remember which side I was supposed to lay on because my gut hurt.\u00a0 I imagined that it was due to the dry heaves which had hit me right after I had put Cochise inside the corral.<\/p>\n<p>I decided that it really wouldn\u2019t matter which side I wanted to sleep on because I was going to have to sleep on my back.\u00a0 That nasty old blanket that was underneath me stunk to high heaven and it wouldn\u2019t take much to make me sick to my stomach again.\u00a0 That\u2019s when I folded my arms behind my head and closed my eyes again.\u00a0 Wincing my face due to a kind of pain I\u2019d never felt in my life, I sat back up on the bunk.\u00a0 The pressure on the back of my head from my injury was incredible.\u00a0 Trying to sleep lying on my folded arms had proven to be a stupid thing to do.\u00a0 Now I felt worse than I had riding up to the cabin.\u00a0 I tried to take in slow even breaths but all I wanted to do was cuss.\u00a0 Deciding I didn\u2019t need to hear anyone, including myself, screaming I just inspected the wound on the back of my head.<\/p>\n<p>It was so strange.\u00a0 I\u2019ve had so many injuries that I can usually spot a life threatening one right off.\u00a0 But not this time.\u00a0 I thought I had just bruised the back of my head and that it would go away in a day or two.\u00a0 Afterall, there wasn\u2019t a drop of blood anywhere.\u00a0 My fingers came back as pristine as they had been before I inspected my wound.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>***So much for me having a hard head like everyone\u2019s always telling me. ***<\/em><\/strong> I thought and slowly eased over to where I had left my canteen.\u00a0 \u201cHere goes nothing,\u201d I remembered whispering and then attempted to get some fluids inside me.<\/p>\n<p>I took in about two mouthfuls and then tried to hold real still so it would stay down.\u00a0 I wasn\u2019t counting on it, but it was a nice thought anyhow.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDay \u2013 day and a half tops and I\u2019ll be fine.\u00a0 Then I\u2019ll figure out where I\u2019ll spend whatever\u2019s left of my life.\u00a0 Right now, I don\u2019t feel like I\u2019ll make it until morning.\u00a0 Guess I\u2019d better try to go down for a while because at least if I\u2019m asleep the pain can\u2019t find me.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>I was far too optimistic.\u00a0 The headache got worse.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>The three Cartwrights had been trying to track in the dark which hadn\u2019t worked out very well.\u00a0 They camped by a stream and waited for daybreak.\u00a0 The next morning, all three men broke camp and mounted their horses.\u00a0 Once they crossed the water and made their way onto the other side, Hoss had spotted the tracks.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThose are Cochise\u2019s hoof prints, Pa,\u201d Hoss announced as he pointed towards them.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cCan you tell which way the kid\u2019s heading?\u201d Adam called over to Hoss who had dismounted and stared down to where the soil by the water\u2019s edge had made a few solid imprints of their brother\u2019s horse tracks.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNot sure,\u201d Hoss sighed as he peered around.\u00a0 \u201cIt looks like Little Joe must\u2019ve spun Cochise around in a circle.\u00a0 Maybe he was trying to figure out his next move?\u201d\u00a0 He could read the concern spreading all over his father\u2019s face and knew that he was worrying about his youngest.\u00a0 \u201cThink it\u2019s time we split up, Pa,\u201d he announced as he climbed back into his saddle.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI think you\u2019re right, Son,\u201d Ben nodded as he stared off into the distance.\u00a0 \u201cHoss you head towards the rimrock area.\u00a0\u00a0 Adam why don\u2019t you head up to the timberline?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhere are you heading, Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI think I\u2019ll go through the north woods and up to Beaver Lake.\u00a0 It\u2019s a longshot.\u00a0 No telling where that boy could be,\u201d Ben answered shaking his head in frustration.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHow about we meet up on Old Mill Road right before sunset if we don\u2019t have any luck?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben nodded and turned Buck northward.\u00a0 \u201cYou boys take care of yourselves.\u00a0 And remember what I said if you do catch up with your little brother,\u201d he warned both of his sons with his stern gaze.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWe\u2019ll just bring him in,\u201d Hoss nodded and waved as he headed east.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cTake care of yourself, Pa,\u201d Adam smiled and then turned his horse due west.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cCome on, Buck,\u201d Ben called to his horse as he lightly kicked at its sides.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>If someone had put a gun up to my head and asked me what time I woke up the following day, I\u2019d have told them to go ahead and shoot.\u00a0 They would\u2019ve been doing me a big favor.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t have any idea what time it was when my eyelids were first assaulted by the sunshine coming through the cracks in those lopsided walls.\u00a0 Trying to remember where I was, I got my answer fast.\u00a0 Instead of my comfortable bed at the ranch house I had fallen through the bunk whose rope supports had finally given way.\u00a0 How I managed to end up sitting on the floor in the middle of the bed with my head tilted back on that hard wooden frame I\u2019ll never know.\u00a0 But what I did know was that my head was absolutely killing me.\u00a0 I wanted to cry but I doubted anything would\u2019ve come out, not as dehydrated as I was due to losing everything inside of me the night before.\u00a0 I held up my arm to block the sunshine from hitting my face and crawled out of that so-called bunk.<\/p>\n<p>My father, the same man who I had punched the previous night, had always told me that the first rule of survival was to find water, food and shelter.\u00a0 I had shelter, at least the four walls had held up that night.\u00a0 More than I can say for that bunk.\u00a0 Anyway, I had water as I noticed a hand pump just outside the door when I\u2019d gotten Cochise taken care of.\u00a0\u00a0 So that was two of the three things that my pa had so wisely told me to find.\u00a0 As my dull throbbing head fought to recall what I had packed, I inventoried what was in my saddle bags.\u00a0 Inside I found a slab of jerky and some hardtack.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t much by way of food, but if I\u2019d wanted to go after game, I still had my rifle, though I\u2019d left my Colt back at the house.\u00a0 But neither mattered too much as just the thought of what the sound of a gun would do to my brain sent shivers up my spine.\u00a0 I needed quiet.\u00a0 Quiet and dark.\u00a0 But then there was the whole survival thing to consider.\u00a0 I decided to try some water first and if that stayed down then my next move would be to take a bite of jerky.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Ben pulled back on his reins as another rider came into view.\u00a0 He waited there on the side of the road and watched as one of his neighbors rode up alongside him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBen?\u00a0 Haven\u2019t seen you in quite a spell,\u201d The man reached across his saddle and held out his hand.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNate \u2013 you\u2019re right it\u2019s been a while.\u00a0 How are Lois and the boys doing?\u201d Ben smiled and shook the man\u2019s outstretched hand.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJust fine.\u00a0 I\u2019ve got my two older boys out looking for strays.\u00a0 How have you and your sons been?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben tried to refrain from showing the concern on his face over all that had transpired since the previous night.\u00a0 \u201cWe\u2019re all doing well.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Nate inspected the other man\u2019s appearance.\u00a0 He had known Ben Cartwright for twenty years and could tell that the man was worried about something that he didn\u2019t want to address at the time.\u00a0 \u00a0\u201cYou\u2019re a far piece from your ranch.\u00a0 Looking for something?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Frowning that he\u2019d not been able to muster much of a poker face, Ben replied, \u201cYes, my youngest.\u00a0 You haven\u2019t seen him, have you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo, can\u2019t say that I have.\u00a0 In fact, haven\u2019t seen any of you since that barn dance better than two months ago.\u00a0 Is Little Joe in some kind of trouble?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Shrugging his shoulders, Ben tried to think of a good response.\u00a0 He liked to keep family business private, but his worry had increased as the day went on and Joseph was nowhere to be found.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m not exactly sure, Nate.\u00a0 Listen \u2013 if you do happen to see the boy would you mind sending me word?\u00a0 Joe\u2019s gone off somewhere and we\u2019re all a bit worried about him.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Nate nodded and reached over and offered a commiserative pat to the other man\u2019s shoulder.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cKids \u2013 they put us poor fathers through the mill, don\u2019t they?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSure do,\u201d Ben sighed wearily.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll be sure to let you know if we spot Little Joe, Ben.\u00a0 Well, I\u2019d better get moving.\u00a0 Gotta go round up those boys of mine.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThanks.\u00a0 Give Lois and the boys my best,\u201d Ben said and offered up a smile.\u00a0 He waved as the other man turned and rode off.\u00a0 Looking up at the sky he realized how late it was getting.\u00a0 Turning Buck towards the Old Mill Road, he kicked at the horse\u2019s sides.\u00a0 He needed to catch up with Hoss and Adam and hoped that they had some better news.<\/p>\n<p>Neither Adam nor Hoss had any better luck than their father had.\u00a0 It was almost dark by the time all three of them gathered just south of the mill.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI dunno, Pa,\u201d Hoss frowned.\u00a0 \u201cI ran into at least a half of a dozen men today and nobody\u2019s seen hide nor hair of Little Joe.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSame here,\u201d Adam nodded over to his father.<\/p>\n<p>Ben stared up at the setting sun and had to make some decisions fast.\u00a0 \u201cWe could bed down but it\u2019s going to be another cold night.\u00a0 Let\u2019s just head on home and regroup.\u00a0 I\u2019m going to see if some of the ranch hands can help us tomorrow.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Both brothers knew that it had been a hard concession for their father to have made.\u00a0 They realized that he\u2019d rather have stayed out looking for Little Joe but was trying to logically think out his next move.<\/p>\n<p>Hoss reached over and patted his father\u2019s arm.\u00a0 \u201cDon\u2019t worry, Pa.\u00a0 We\u2019ll find him.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben shook his head and sighed.\u00a0 His fatherly intuition told him that his youngest was in some kind of trouble and he needed him.\u00a0 \u201cLet\u2019s go, Boys,\u201d he said and turned Buck in the direction of the ranch house.\u00a0 Ben knew it was going to be another long night like the previous one.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>I was glad to have kept both the water and the three bites of jerky down though I still felt like I might lose it all.\u00a0 The most I had done all day was fill my canteen, go talk to Cochise, feed her and rest.\u00a0 It was time to make some decisions, and it was hard to do because it hurt to think.\u00a0 The wind had picked up, and the cabin was becoming uncomfortably cold.\u00a0 I wanted to wait until the sun was down because looking at any kind of light still made my head hurt worse.\u00a0 But I knew I\u2019d need wood, so I walked around and scavenged enough for the night and dropped the two arms full down in front of that old potbelly stove.\u00a0 I groaned due to my stupid move.\u00a0 The sound of that wood hitting the floor sent shockwaves through to my brain, it was that loud.\u00a0 I swore that I\u2019d never do that again. \u00a0A chill went through me as a gust of wind pierced the cracks in those four walls.\u00a0 I wished that I had some coffee just to warm up my insides.\u00a0 In fact, I wish I had a tin cup, but I hadn\u2019t had time to gather a mess kit due to my leaving the way I had; like some criminal running from the law.\u00a0 I did have a slicker that had been rolled up behind my saddle, and I had to put it on once the temperature dropped.\u00a0 The darn thing didn\u2019t do much for me as thin as it was.\u00a0 There I was with no jacket, no cup, and no coffee.\u00a0 And on top of all that I didn\u2019t have anything that I could use to get my head to stop killing me.\u00a0 It was at that moment that I gave up on the notion that I\u2019d just gotten a lump that would heal in a day or two.\u00a0 What with the way it hadn\u2019t let up, I knew that my injury was far worse than I had originally thought.\u00a0 Now I was in a real fix.\u00a0 I stoked the fire and then I placed some pine boughs underneath both the moth-eaten and horse blankets.\u00a0 The night was fast approaching, and I\u2019d hoped to sleep on something softer than the hard wood floor.\u00a0 I missed my home.\u00a0 I missed Hop Sing and how he would\u2019ve given me some kind of tea to help with my headache.\u00a0 I missed my brothers even though they were ready to tear me apart over what I had done.\u00a0 At that point it would have been a mercy killing if they were to come and find my sorry butt.\u00a0 Most of all I missed my Pa, but I couldn\u2019t get the look on his face out of my thoughts.\u00a0 He had stared at me right before turning to walk out of my room and into the hallway.\u00a0 Pa\u2019s expression was filled with both shock and betrayal.\u00a0 The shock was due to his surprise over the fact that his youngest son had hauled out and hit him.\u00a0 The betrayal was because he\u2019d never expected it, especially from me.\u00a0 I sat at the table and dropped my head on top of my folded arms.\u00a0 Tears wouldn\u2019t come, maybe because I knew it would hurt if I let them all out.\u00a0 Just thinking about what had happened was driving me crazy and knowing that I couldn\u2019t take any of it back was unbearable.<\/p>\n<p>I hadn\u2019t fallen asleep, I had blacked out, and when I came around the fire in the stove had gone out and the cabin was just plain freezing.\u00a0 Looking up from the floor, which was where I had apparently landed when I passed out, I tried to figure out what had happened.\u00a0 Pulling myself back to my feet I couldn\u2019t do much more than to rub at the back of my head.\u00a0 But that didn\u2019t do anything but make my head hurt even worse.\u00a0 I restoked the fire and decided that I would pull some pine needles off the boughs which were stuffed underneath the blankets on the floor.\u00a0 I remembered Hop Sing once said that there was something good in pine needles, but I couldn\u2019t figure out what he said that it was.\u00a0 That reminded me of the previous night when I couldn\u2019t remember which side a person was supposed to sleep on if their gut was hurting.\u00a0 I guess I should pay more attention when people try to tell me useful cures.\u00a0 Anyway, I found a pan stuffed behind some old rusty cans in a cabinet behind the stove.\u00a0 I used that to heat the water and placed a handful of the pine needles in it and waited for it to steep.\u00a0 I wanted to use one of the cans I had found as a cup, but it was all rusted and I had enough to worry about without getting sick from using that.\u00a0 I sat back down at the table and tried to get my bearings again.\u00a0 I decided that if I lived through the night that I\u2019d make a trip the next day.\u00a0 I would have to travel right before it got too dark because the sunlight just plain went through me and made my head hurt worse.\u00a0 Hoss and I had camped about five miles from the cabin on our way back from a horse buying trip a couple of years ago.\u00a0 I recalled that there was a trading post not too far away and a heck of a lot closer than Virginia City.\u00a0 Besides, I didn\u2019t want to be seen by anyone just in case they\u2019d report back to my family.\u00a0 I still felt like some kind of a criminal running from the law but most likely no one was tailing me.\u00a0 Why would they?\u00a0 My brothers weren\u2019t about to forgive me and I couldn\u2019t blame them.\u00a0 And then there was Pa.\u00a0 Okay my father has always forgiven folks if they ask him.\u00a0 That\u2019s the type of man he is.\u00a0 Lord knows he\u2019s forgiven me numerous times, and many when I don\u2019t think that he should have.\u00a0 But this was different.\u00a0 It had been such a betrayal on my part to have hit him like that.\u00a0 Plus blindsiding him the way that I had was lower than low.\u00a0 I\u2019d have felt better about it if he had hauled off and hit me back instead of just walking away.\u00a0 I know it wouldn\u2019t have helped my darn head but it sure would\u2019ve made my heart feel better.\u00a0 The thought of my family and how each one felt about me was driving me insane and I had enough problems due to my injury.\u00a0 Trying to refocus my attention on other things I thought about the next day and what I\u2019d need to do.\u00a0 \u00a0I would go to that trading post and get some of the things I didn\u2019t have time to pack.\u00a0 I needed a jacket or coat because it was getting downright chilly even during the day.\u00a0 If I thought that I could stomach it, I\u2019d need some coffee and maybe some sugar too.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t have a pencil, or I would\u2019ve started to make a list.\u00a0 It\u2019s probably a good thing that I didn\u2019t have one.\u00a0 It hurt too much just looking out of my eyes, so I didn\u2019t want to focus on anything until my headache let up.\u00a0 I decided to cool the pine needle concoction and try to get some of it down before I attempted to get some sleep.\u00a0 Deciding that tomorrow would just have to take care of itself, I gave up on thinking ahead.\u00a0 Just getting through the night and fighting the pain that I was in was more than enough for me.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Ben stepped aside as both his boys placed their holsters on the credenza and walked into the living room.\u00a0 He unbuckled his gun belt next and rolled it up.\u00a0 When he readied to place it alongside the other two, his eyes fell on the left-handed holster.\u00a0 A sharp pain stabbed his heart.\u00a0 He missed his youngest boy, and it showed all over his face.\u00a0 His fingers gently swept across the ivory handle of Joe\u2019s Colt.\u00a0 He knew that his son was somewhere without it now and that made his worry increase.\u00a0\u00a0 <strong><em>*** Oh, Joseph.\u00a0 Where are you?\u00a0 Why did you run off?\u00a0 Were you afraid of what I\u2019d do to you because of what happened between us?\u00a0 I know that you didn\u2019t mean it.\u00a0 I\u2019ll never believe that you did it on purpose.\u00a0 Whatever was going through your mind at the time must\u2019ve made you do it.\u00a0 Are you sick?\u00a0 If so \u2013 then why didn\u2019t you just tell me?\u00a0 I need you here.\u00a0 No matter what you did I love you, Boy.\u00a0 Please just come home. *** <\/em><\/strong>Ben thought as he squeezed his eyes closed to stay his tears.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa?\u201d Hoss called from his position in front of the fireplace where both he and Adam were standing warming their hands.\u00a0 \u201cPa \u2013 why don\u2019t you come over here and get warmed up?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Coughing into his fist, Ben attempted to push away the thick emotion.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m going to talk to Hop Sing for a minute and then I\u2019ll join you boys.\u201d\u00a0 With that said, he turned into the next room.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhere Little Joe?\u201d Hop Sing asked as his boss entered the kitchen.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHe\u2019s out there<strong><em> somewhere<\/em><\/strong>.\u00a0 We\u2019ll just have to go back out after him tomorrow.\u00a0 Do you have anything for us, Old Friend?\u201d Ben attempted to put on a smile which lost its effect before making it all the way up to his lips.<\/p>\n<p>Hop Sing nodded as he studied the other man\u2019s face.\u00a0 He knew how Ben felt about the youngest boy and how much he worried about him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHop Sing made chicken.\u00a0 I bring in soon.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you,\u201d Ben patted the cook\u2019s shoulder and was preparing to leave the room when he felt the man\u2019s hand on his arm pulling him back.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNot to worry, Mister Ben \u2013 Little Joe come back.\u00a0 You see.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Biting his lip trying to fight his fear over Little Joe\u2019s welfare, Ben simply nodded and turned out of the kitchen.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>I had another rough night though at least I didn\u2019t fall onto the floor like I had that first one in the cabin.\u00a0 That was easy because I slept there.\u00a0 The pine boughs smelled better than the blanket that covered it.\u00a0 But it sure got cold!\u00a0 I awoke and tried to remember how many days I\u2019d been hurting so badly.\u00a0 I guessed three but I wasn\u2019t sure anymore.\u00a0 I stoked that stove again and stood right in front of it trying to get warm.\u00a0 Now I knew that I would have to get to that trading post before I froze my fool self to death.\u00a0 Though that would rid me of the God-awful headache, just the same I didn\u2019t want to die that way.\u00a0 I fed and watered Cochise and she seemed happy to escape that rope corral.\u00a0 By the look of the sun, I guessed it was well past noon.\u00a0 So, I saddled my horse and made my way some five miles due north and got to the trading post a little more than an hour later.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat can I get you?\u201d The stocky man behind the counter asked Joe as he walked towards him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou got any coats?\u00a0 I don\u2019t have one with me,\u201d Joe answered and dropped his head down a bit, still fighting the mounting pain.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGot some used ones.\u00a0 They\u2019re a bit rough looking though,\u201d He returned and studied his patron\u2019s appearance.\u00a0 By the looks of him he wasn\u2019t much more than a kid.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJust need something warm is all.\u00a0 I\u2019m not picky.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The owner turned away from the counter and went down to one knee.\u00a0 He rummaged through a box full of used clothing.\u00a0 He finally came up with a plain gray woolen coat and handed it across to his customer.<\/p>\n<p>Joe pulled it on and though the sleeves hung down way past his wrists it was nice and warm.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll take it,\u201d he said, rolling the cuffs up a bit.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m gonna need some coffee and sugar.\u00a0 Oh, I\u2019m also gonna need a coffee pot along with a tin cup.\u00a0 Better throw in a spoon, fork and a knife. \u00a0I could use a handful of candles too. Guess I\u2019d better get a couple cans of beans.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve got any I\u2019d be obliged.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThat it?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah, that should hold me for a while.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The man nodded.\u00a0 He turned and gathered everything that Joe had requested and placed each item inside a brown paper sack.\u00a0 When he turned back around, he noticed that the young man had his head down on the counter.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHey, are you okay?\u201d He asked and quickly walked around to the other side and neared the boy.<\/p>\n<p>Joe\u2019s face flinched with increasing pain.\u00a0 With a great deal of effort, he lifted his head as he closed his eyes.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah,\u201d He nodded, attempting to hide the mounting pressure from his injury.\u00a0 \u201cWould you mind whispering?\u00a0 Can\u2019t take loud noises.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou don\u2019t look too good.\u00a0 You have a headache?\u201d the man asked and dropped his voice to a whisper realizing that the young man was hurting a great deal.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYep.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cMust be awfully bad by the looks of you.\u00a0 There\u2019s a doctor over in Virginia City who\u2019s pretty good.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe fought back a smile.\u00a0 Doctor Paul Martin had been tending to him ever since he had brought him into the world some seventeen years earlier.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDon\u2019t feel up to riding that far,\u201d Joe replied and finally pulled himself upright.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou get hurt?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah \u2013 hit my head on a rock,\u201d he answered though he hadn\u2019t planned on saying anything to anyone.\u00a0 As far as he was concerned, the less folks knew about him the better it would be.\u00a0 The man in front of him just happened to be persistent enough to elicit a response from him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou know my second cousin hit his head.\u00a0 Yeah, he had a terrible time,\u201d The man continued.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>*** Great \u2013 just what I need to hear right about now. ***<\/em><\/strong> Joe thought to himself.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLet me guess,\u201d Joe began wryly as he grabbed the bag with his supplies.\u00a0 \u201cYour cousin hurt his head and died, right?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The man shook his head, \u201cNo, he\u2019s alive but he had to have some kind of surgery.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSurgery just because he hit his head?\u201d Joe asked incredulously.\u00a0 He was sure that the man was making the story up to frighten him.\u00a0 It was working.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThe doctor in Sacramento said that if he hadn\u2019t had that surgery, he would\u2019ve died within a week.\u00a0 It\u2019s a good thing that he went to see that doctor when he did.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJust what kind of surgery did they do?\u201d Little Joe was beginning to believe the man\u2019s story now.<\/p>\n<p>The man pointed to the back of his head and returned, \u201cThey put a hole right about here.\u00a0 Yeah \u2013 they drilled it somehow.\u00a0 My cousin said there was bleeding around his brain.\u00a0 Way he tells it is that his skull would\u2019ve kept filling up with blood until it slap ran out of room,\u201d the man stopped and snapped his fingers.\u00a0 \u201cThen he\u2019d have been dead just that quick!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSo, now your cousin has a hole in his head?\u201d Little Joe questioned his voice steeped in fear.\u00a0 The mere thought over what the man had just relayed made his chest tighten with dread.<\/p>\n<p>The man nodded, \u201cYeah \u2013 but the doctor gave him a special hat to wear.\u00a0 It\u2019s made of some kind of metal, so he won\u2019t hurt himself.\u00a0 That hole ain\u2019t never gonna fill in so he\u2019s got to be careful and keep that thing on his head all the time.\u00a0 Now I ain\u2019t saying it was a good-looking thing to have happen to his head.\u00a0 Nobody wants to spend their life with a hole in their noggin.\u00a0 But that surgery sure saved his life.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHow exactly did your cousin get hurt?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHe fell off his horse and smacked his head on a rock.\u00a0 He said that the headache he had about drove him crazy it hurt so much.\u00a0 He couldn\u2019t handle loud noises, and he said that just being out in the light was awful.\u00a0 He told me that it\u2019s the most excruciating pain known to man. \u00a0But at least it made him go and see the doctor. So, I guess it was a good thing that his body warned him that he was in trouble.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe bit at his bottom lip and fought back his fear again.\u00a0 His head was killing him, and he had just listened to a story that didn\u2019t help with the way he was feeling.\u00a0 It had only heightened Joe\u2019s worry and made him wonder if he would soon be facing a similar fate.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHow much I owe you?\u201d Joe asked as he reached inside his pants pocket.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cTwo and a quarter ought to square us.\u00a0 I won\u2019t charge for the coat since it\u2019s in such bad shape.\u00a0 I doubt anyone else would want it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe placed the money on the counter and nodded to the man.\u00a0 \u201cThanks, I appreciate it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHey \u2013 you never did say how you hit your head?\u201d He called across the counter as he watched Little Joe heading for the door.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cFell off a horse,\u201d Joe muttered and walked away.<\/p>\n<p>The man shook his head sadly as he watched the boy heading out to his pinto.\u00a0 He prayed that the kid would be okay.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>\u201cPa \u2013 I\u2019m going out to the herd to talk to some of the ranch hands.\u00a0 I\u2019ll leave word that Little Joe is missing,\u201d Adam called across the room when he spotted his father coming down the stairs the next morning.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDid you eat?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, Sir \u2013 so did Hoss.\u00a0 He already left for Virginia City.\u00a0 He\u2019s going to check around to see if anyone spotted Joe there.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSorry \u2013 I guess I slept longer than I planned,\u201d Ben apologized as he walked to the door.<\/p>\n<p>Adam placed a hand on his father\u2019s shoulder and replied, \u201cPa, we heard you.\u00a0 You were up half the night.\u00a0 You didn\u2019t sleep any better than Hoss and I did.\u00a0 Try not to fret we\u2019ll find the kid.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben simply nodded, finding words hard to come by that morning.\u00a0 He had gone directly into Little Joe\u2019s bedroom the minute he had awakened hoping to find that Joseph had come home.\u00a0 Sitting down on the boy\u2019s bed all he could think of was the way that Joe had acted the night he had left.\u00a0 He knew that there was something wrong with him.\u00a0 There was something in the boy\u2019s hazel eyes that told him he wasn\u2019t feeling well but Joe had merely told him that he was tired.\u00a0 Ben couldn\u2019t imagine what his youngest had been keeping from him.\u00a0 It just wasn\u2019t like his son to simply run away without bothering to face him.\u00a0 The boy was in trouble, and he couldn\u2019t find him and that made Ben spend another night tossing and turning and worrying about his son.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll be back just as soon as I can.\u00a0 Pa, don\u2019t worry,\u201d Adam said as he opened the door and walked outside.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>*** Pa don\u2019t worry. <strong><em><\/em><\/strong> Ben thought about what his eldest had said and sighed.\u00a0 He knew that he\u2019d always worry about his boys, it was just his nature.\u00a0 And now he was afraid for his youngest who was perhaps sick and somewhere all alone.\u00a0 <strong><em><\/em><\/strong> Joseph just come on home. ***<\/em><\/strong> He prayed.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>I had a rougher ride back to the cabin than I had going out to that trading post.\u00a0 My head throbbed and my mind kept going back to that man and his cousin with the hole in his skull.\u00a0 It made sense though.\u00a0 Of all the people that I could meet in an out-of-the-way trading post I found the one man who knew all about awful headaches and how to cure them by punching a hole in a person\u2019s skull.\u00a0 I took the time to feed and settle Cochise down and then brought all my supplies inside the cabin.\u00a0 The two canteens needed filling, and I had to gather more broken branches, so I\u2019d have enough wood to last until the morning.\u00a0 I took care of those chores and got ready for another long night.\u00a0 It was getting colder by the hour but at least I finally had a coat.\u00a0 \u00a0As I sat by the stove and waited for my coffee to heat up, mindlessly the fingers of my left hand found their way to the back of my head.\u00a0 I guess I was hoping that my scalp would just open up all by itself and if there was blood pooling inside my head that it would just pour out so I\u2019d get some relief.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t have anything better to pass the time, so I just spoke to myself.\u00a0 It wouldn\u2019t have mattered if it seemed odd since there wasn\u2019t anyone else around to hear me.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI bet just about now everyone\u2019s sitting down to eat supper.\u00a0 I\u2019m sure it\u2019s better than beef jerky and hardtack.\u00a0 Of course, I have some beans if I want to go through the trouble of heating them up, which I don\u2019t.\u00a0 I wonder if they\u2019re still talking about me and the terrible thing that I did?\u00a0 I can just see Pa sitting there with that look on his face that he gets when he\u2019s angry with me but doesn\u2019t want to say anything right away.\u00a0 But his eyes always told me more than his words ever could.\u00a0 And now he\u2019s probably looking like that and thinking about his youngest son who has been nothing but trouble his whole miserable life.\u00a0 \u00a0Adam\u2019s probably sitting there saying that it\u2019s better this way and that it\u2019s a good thing that I left.\u00a0 \u00a0And Hoss \u2013 well he probably just wants me back so he can pound me good.\u00a0 I wouldn\u2019t blame any of them for being glad that I\u2019m gone.\u00a0 I only wish that &#8212;,\u201d Joe had to stop his soliloquy because the tears had come at long last.\u00a0 He dropped his head down on his folded arms and wept.\u00a0 The thought of what he had done stabbed his heart, and he couldn\u2019t help feeling lower than he\u2019d ever felt before.\u00a0 The plain fact was that no matter how hard he tried to tell himself differently, he missed his father and his brothers.\u00a0 He wished that he hadn\u2019t left like he had but now he knew that it had been for the best.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m probably gonna die anyhow.\u00a0 I\u2019ve probably got the same thing as that man\u2019s cousin had.\u00a0 But I\u2019m not getting a darn hole cut in my head anyway.\u00a0 I could go home and tell Pa what happened to me and live out my last days there.\u00a0 But there\u2019s always the chance that I\u2019d hit Pa or one of my brothers when my head gets so bad that I just can\u2019t take it anymore.\u00a0 I guess that\u2019s what happens to me right before I blackout.\u00a0 I just couldn\u2019t chance that happening again.\u00a0 \u00a0At least out here I can\u2019t hurt anyone other than myself.\u00a0 And if I did go home, I could just imagine what Pa would say.\u00a0 No matter what I\u2019ve done he\u2019d try to help me, I guess, the same way he\u2019d help a stranger.\u00a0 It\u2019s probably what he thinks I am now anyhow.\u00a0 I sure didn\u2019t act like any son of his \u2013 hitting him like I did.\u00a0 But Pa would try to be kind, that\u2019s just his way.\u00a0 Maybe he\u2019d tell me that he\u2019s taking me to get that surgery whether I want a hole drilled in my head or not?\u00a0 Then none of them would be mad anymore because they\u2019d feel sorry for me.\u00a0 No, I\u2019m not going back for that.\u00a0 I\u2019d rather they all just thought that I left for places unknown and that I lived out my days alone like an outcast.\u00a0 It\u2019s a sure bet that nobody will find me after I die \u2013 well &#8212; other than the buzzards or rats as they pick apart my body.\u201d\u00a0 I pushed back my tears as I grabbed a rag to lift the coffee pot.\u00a0 Pouring the first coffee that I\u2019d had in days, I brought it over to the table<strong><em>.\u00a0 *** God just don\u2019t let anyone know that I died like this \u2013 please! ***<\/em><\/strong> I pleaded as I sat back down at the table.\u00a0 Slowly sipping the coffee, I made a vain attempt to push away all thoughts of my family.\u00a0 It didn\u2019t work.\u00a0 If I were to be perfectly honest with myself, I\u2019d have to admit that I wanted my father.\u00a0 Pa wouldn\u2019t be able to stop what was happening inside of my head but just having him here next to me would make me feel better somehow.\u00a0 \u00a0But I knew that I\u2019d never be able to face him again due to the punch I had thrown which had knocked him to the floor.\u00a0 And it would be a selfish thing to do anyway if I were to just show up and tell everyone that I didn\u2019t have long to live.\u00a0 I felt like I had caused enough heartache for Pa; and he didn\u2019t need anymore.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Hop Sing had forced some breakfast on Ben and made him eat it whether he wanted to or not.\u00a0 The cook could be a powerhouse when he wanted to, and nobody had ever won an argument with the man.\u00a0 Ben begrudgingly obliged Hop Sing and got down some eggs and toast along with several cups of coffee.\u00a0 Just as he stood to walk into the next room there was a loud thump on the door.\u00a0 He hurried over to answer it, hoping that it might be some news concerning Little Joe\u2019s whereabouts.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHowdy, Ben,\u201d The foreman nodded to his boss as Ben led him inside the house.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cFletcher \u2013 have you spoken to either Hoss or Adam?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The man nodded and then studied Ben\u2019s face carefully taking note of the bruise on his right cheek.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYep, heard that the boy\u2019s run off.\u00a0 Passed Adam a little while ago and he told me the kid\u2019s been missing a couple of days now.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben sighed and tried not to show the mounting concern he was feeling at the time.<\/p>\n<p>Tilting his head and offering an accusatory stare, Fletcher asked, \u201cHave anything to do with that, Ben?\u201d He pointed to the other man\u2019s right cheek.<\/p>\n<p>Pursing his lips trying to think of a good explanation, Ben was at a loss to answer the man\u2019s question.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou ain\u2019t got to tell me.\u00a0 It was that ornery little varmint what done it.\u00a0 I can see it all over your face \u2013 and not just where that bruise is either,\u201d Fletcher grinned.<\/p>\n<p>Clearing his throat, Ben responded, \u201cWe just need to find the boy.\u00a0 Hoss is checking in town and Adam\u2019s going to try and get some of the hired hands to go out looking for him.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat kind of trouble is Little Joe in <strong><em>this<\/em><\/strong> time?\u201d Fletcher continued, never one to hold back from speaking his mind.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNow listen,\u201d Ben\u2019s voice grew in volume.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t need an inquisition he needed to find his son.\u00a0 \u201cI just want everyone to keep an eye out for Joseph.\u00a0 I\u2019m not sure if he\u2019s sick or not, but I want him back home.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cMust\u2019ve been sick to throw a punch at his pa,\u201d Fletcher nodded.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNever said he did,\u201d Ben countered gruffly.<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher chuckled as he patted Ben\u2019s arm.\u00a0 \u201cYou didn\u2019t have to say it \u2013 I seen it in your eyes.\u00a0 Relax \u2013 I won\u2019t tell nobody.\u00a0 Now \u2013 you ain\u2019t got a clue as to where the boy ran off to?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThe three of us went all over this ranch yesterday and couldn\u2019t find him.\u00a0 I\u2019ve no clue where he\u2019s holed up, Fletcher.\u00a0 But I\u2019m worried about him.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBen \u2013 no wonder you\u2019ve got white hair!\u00a0 You\u2019ve been worrying about those no-account lazy youngins for far too long.\u00a0 I say let \u2018em all leave so you can sit out there in that rocking chair and wait for them to bring you home the next batch of brats.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you for that sage advice,\u201d Ben grumbled as he shook his head.\u00a0 \u201cNow are you going to help me or not?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay I\u2019ll go find the kid.\u00a0 But I\u2019ve got one last thing to ask,\u201d he returned as he moved to the front door and pulled it open.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat\u2019s that?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Grinning, Fletcher stared over at his old friend and replied, \u201cYou<strong><em> sure<\/em><\/strong> you want him back?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, I\u2019m sure,\u201d he groaned.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAlright \u2013 I just had to ask.\u00a0 I guess if he were my boy I\u2019d want him back too.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you for understanding,\u201d Ben nodded, thinking that the man finally understood how much he loved his sons.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah \u2013 I\u2019d want him back so I could sock him good just to get even with him!\u201d Fletcher laughed and walked away.<\/p>\n<p>Ben sighed as he watched the foreman mounting his horse and turning it out of the yard.\u00a0 <strong><em>*** I fell for it that time, you old coot!\u00a0 But I know you\u2019re just playing it off for my benefit.\u00a0 You care about those boys \u2013 always have! ***<\/em><\/strong> He thought and walked back into the living room.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>I don\u2019t know where I had been standing or sitting at the time that it happened, but I came around to find that I\u2019d had another blackout.\u00a0 The one thing that I did know was that the room was ice cold and that I was shivering.\u00a0 There were still some good-sized branches on the floor in front of the stove, so I stoked it again and reached for the matches to get it lit.\u00a0 It hadn\u2019t taken long for the pine sap to start popping as the flames grew higher.\u00a0 I could\u2019ve done without that noise.\u00a0 I touched the bottom of the coffee pot, and it was just as cold as the stove had been.\u00a0 Opening the lid, I realized that the most that I\u2019d drunk was just about a cup, so I decided to reheat it to try and warm up my insides.\u00a0 It was starting to really worry me that I never had any warning before my head got so bad that it brought me down to my knees and then I was dead to the world.\u00a0 I wish that had happened the night back at the ranch house.\u00a0 If only I had just passed out instead of hauling off and knocking my father to the floor.\u00a0 At least then I wouldn\u2019t be sitting in a lopsided cabin alone and dealing with everything by myself.\u00a0 I noticed the sunlight peering through the cracks in the wall and I suddenly realized that I must\u2019ve been out cold all night.\u00a0 I wished that being unconscious for so long had helped my head, but it hadn\u2019t.\u00a0 The pain was just as fierce as it had been for days.\u00a0 I had no idea how long it had been since the day that I\u2019d gotten thrown from that bronc and hit that rock.\u00a0 At that particular moment it seemed as though I had been battling through this headache for years.\u00a0 Just when I was about to check the coffee to see if it was ready I heard a noise and it almost took my breath away.\u00a0 It was gunfire and the very last thing that I needed to hear!\u00a0 The sound of it felt just like someone was sticking a red-hot fire poker right through to my brain. I walked over to where I\u2019d set my rifle and checked to make sure that it was loaded before flinging the door open and stepping out onto the small front porch.\u00a0 Though the simple act of doing so killed my head, I scanned the tree line hoping to find out who was making all that racket.\u00a0 It only took a few minutes before someone came into view.<\/p>\n<p>A young blonde headed boy who looked to be in his early teens approached Little Joe.\u00a0 He had a rifle held in one hand and with his other he waved to show that he didn\u2019t mean any harm.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHey, Mister \u2013 thought I saw somebody over at this place,\u201d The kid smiled as he walked closer to the porch.<\/p>\n<p>Joe cringed to hear the boy\u2019s voice.\u00a0 He had grown accustomed to the blissful silence and now that it had been broken it only increased the pain from his head wound.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSomething I can do for you?\u201d he offered, hoping that he could make the boy leave quickly.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBeen out hunting and noticed your pinto.\u00a0 It\u2019s a good-looking horse.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah,\u201d Joe nodded.\u00a0 \u201cListen \u2013 I\u2019d love to stand and talk but I can\u2019t right now.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou gonna live here?\u201d The boy persisted undeterred by the young man\u2019s eagerness to be rid of him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah \u2013 for a little while.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI live about three miles that-a-way,\u201d The boy pointed to the east.\u00a0 \u201cMy name\u2019s Billy.\u00a0 Billy Kent.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cName\u2019s Joe,\u201d he returned and then felt an unyielding surge of pain sweeping over him.\u00a0 Joe was frightened that he might hurt the kid like he had hurt Pa.\u00a0 Knowing that he couldn\u2019t trust himself anymore he tried to get the boy to leave.\u00a0 \u201cListen, Billy \u2013 if you wouldn\u2019t mind \u2013 could you do your hunting a little bit closer to home?\u00a0 I\u2019m not feeling all that well and I need my sleep.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat you got?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe groaned.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t need any more questions he only needed peace.\u00a0 \u201cBilly, I\u2019m not at all well so I\u2019ve got to go lay down.\u00a0 I\u2019m sorry.\u00a0 Maybe we can talk in a couple of weeks \u2013 but until then I need my rest.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDid a doctor tell you that, Joe?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes,\u201d Joe stated adamantly and turned back for the door.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI could ask my Ma to come over to tend you?\u00a0 She\u2019s good with stuff like that.\u00a0 I had the chickenpox last year and she fixed me good as new.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo.\u00a0 I\u2019ve got something contagious and the doctor told me not to let anyone near me, so they won\u2019t get it.\u00a0 Now \u2013 all\u2019s I need is some quiet and lots of sleep.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWell \u2013 alright then.\u00a0 I\u2019ll hunt down yonder!\u201d He pointed towards the woods.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThe farther the better, Billy.\u00a0 Thanks,\u201d Joe nodded and then turned back inside the cabin closing the door behind him.\u00a0 He had made it in the nick of time.\u00a0 Falling to his knees, Little Joe gripped his head and gasped.\u00a0 It was then that he blacked out cold.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>The three Cartwrights gathered around the fireplace later that evening and discussed what they had accomplished regarding trying to find out where Little Joe had gone.\u00a0 All of them wore frowns on their faces feeling like they hadn\u2019t made much progress after three full days of searching.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou know, Pa, I spoke to Cody,\u201d Adam began and dropped down into the blue winged back chair.\u00a0 \u201cHe was out at the breaking corral and said that Little Joe took a pretty good fall the day he left.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben leaned forward in his chair and set his coffee cup down on the table in front of him.\u00a0 \u201cWas he hurt?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam shrugged his shoulders as he watched the look of concern growing on his father\u2019s careworn face.\u00a0 \u201cI don\u2019t think so.\u00a0 Least wise Cody said Joe got right back on another bronc after he got tossed off the other one.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Shaking his head, Ben frowned.\u00a0 \u201cIt just doesn\u2019t make the least bit of sense \u2013 none of it!\u00a0 Hoss?\u00a0 You sure nobody\u2019s seen your brother in town?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Hoss moved closer to the two men and stood in front of the fireplace.\u00a0 \u201cIt\u2019s just like I told you, Pa.\u00a0 I checked all the saloons \u2013 the mercantile \u2013 even the bank and no one\u2019s seen him.\u00a0 I talked to Roy and told him that Little Joe is missing, and he said he\u2019d keep an eye out for him and let you know.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThen we\u2019re back to square one,\u201d Ben sighed wearily.<\/p>\n<p>Hoss and Adam exchanged concerned glances knowing that their father\u2019s worry was increasing the longer that the boy hadn\u2019t been spotted anywhere.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThat\u2019s not true, Pa,\u201d Adam insisted.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019ve spoken to most of the hired hands and a half a dozen of them are gonna search the ranch tomorrow.\u00a0 Jake and Cody are going to hit all the line shacks.\u00a0 Maybe the kid is holed up in one of them?\u00a0 He\u2019s done that before you know.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI know,\u201d Ben replied and stood to warm his hands in front of the fireplace.\u00a0 \u201cFletcher is going out looking for Joe too.\u00a0 Hopefully somebody will find him tomorrow.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOh, he\u2019s alright, Pa,\u201d Hoss offered a reassuring smile and dropped a hand onto his father\u2019s shoulder.\u00a0 \u201cLittle Joe might be young, but he can take care of himself.\u00a0 We\u2019ve all taught him a lot over the years.\u00a0 He\u2019ll be okay until we find him.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben shook his head, unconvinced by what his son had said.\u00a0 \u201cI know he\u2019s capable of taking care of himself \u2013 but there\u2019s something wrong with him.\u00a0 I can feel it.\u00a0 Joseph wouldn\u2019t just run off without saying something.\u00a0 And he\u2019d never have thrown a punch at me.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa \u2013 somebody\u2019s going to find the kid.\u00a0 Like as not he\u2019ll be right here in this living room with us tomorrow,\u201d Adam joined the two men in front of the fireplace offering his solidarity and trying to assuage his father\u2019s worry.<\/p>\n<p>Ben stared back and forth between his two boys and let out an exhausted sigh.\u00a0 \u201cYou\u2019re both probably right.\u00a0 Well, I think I\u2019ll turn in.\u00a0 Goodnight.\u201d\u00a0 He walked to the staircase and slowly went up to his bedroom.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHe\u2019s sure taking it hard,\u201d Hoss frowned and watched as his pa disappeared up the stairs.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWell, you know how he\u2019s always felt about the kid, Hoss.\u00a0 We\u2019ll find Joe and Pa will be okay.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI sure hope so,\u201d Hoss nodded as he sank down into his father\u2019s chair.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Ben paused before pulling the door to his bedroom open and cast a glance across the hall over at Little Joe\u2019s room.\u00a0 He drew in a deep breath and fought the temptation to go inside.\u00a0 Deciding that it was foolish to pine away for the boy who most likely would be found soon, he pushed his door open and got ready for bed.\u00a0 He removed his clothes and set them down on the chair next to his bed.\u00a0 Pulling on his nightshirt he crawled underneath his covers and tried to will himself to sleep.\u00a0 He had only been slumbering for less than an hour when he woke with a start, his heart pounding in his chest as he sat straight up in his bed.\u00a0 Ben had dreamt about Marie, Little Joe\u2019s mother, and it had left him with such an uneasy feeling that he had to get out of his bed.\u00a0 He reached for his robe resting on the footboard and pulled it on.\u00a0 It was then that he recalled why he had dreamed about the woman.\u00a0 He hadn\u2019t had that particular nightmare in many years and had almost forgotten about it.\u00a0 But, due to the subject matter, he knew that he\u2019d now have to go across the hallway.<\/p>\n<p>Ben quietly walked into Little Joe\u2019s bedroom and lit the lamp.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>*** You\u2019re an old fool, Ben Cartwright. <strong><em><\/em><\/strong> He thought to himself as he slowly glanced around the bedroom.\u00a0 It was a room that now seemed so empty that it sent a stabbing pain to his heart.\u00a0 Ben couldn\u2019t recall how many times over the seventeen years since Joe\u2019s birth he had quietly slipped into his son\u2019s bedroom just to make sure that the curly-headed boy was sound asleep.\u00a0 But that night Ben was seeking something other than his boy, something he had presumed would be on his son\u2019s bed where he had last seen it.\u00a0 <strong><em><\/em><\/strong> Not again! ***<\/em><\/strong> Ben\u2019s heart fell in his chest as he hurried back out into the hallway.\u00a0 He jogged down the backstairs and rounded the kitchen, coming to a halt just outside of the cook\u2019s quarters.\u00a0 Ben knocked on the door and waited.<\/p>\n<p>A very groggy-looking Hop Sing stared up at his boss standing there in front of him with a strange expression on his face.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat you want, Mister Ben?\u00a0 You find Little Joe?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Shaking his head, Ben returned, \u201cNo \u2013 no we haven\u2019t.\u00a0 I need to know what you\u2019ve done with Joseph\u2019s robe.\u00a0 Where is it?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Hop Sing was surprised by the urgency in Ben\u2019s question.\u00a0 \u201cLittle Joe robe?\u00a0 Hop Sing take \u2013 must wash robe tomorrow, alight?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo!\u00a0 Where is it?\u00a0 I need it,\u201d Ben\u2019s voice came out sounding very agitated.<\/p>\n<p>Hop Sing padded into the kitchen with Ben following closely behind him.\u00a0 The cook reached inside the wash basket and dug down to the bottom coming up with the boy\u2019s bathrobe.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHere&#8212; need wash!\u201d Hop Sing insisted though he relinquished it to Ben against his better judgement.<\/p>\n<p>Ben pressed the robe to his chest and closed his eyes.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t speak for several minutes.<\/p>\n<p>Witnessing the look of sadness on his friend\u2019s face, Hop Sing finally understood why the man was standing like that, holding the robe as though it was Little Joe himself.\u00a0 Many years ago, Hop Sing had made a great error in judgement.\u00a0 A few months after Marie Cartwright had died, he had decided that it was time to remove her robe from Ben\u2019s bedroom.\u00a0 He had washed it and boxed it up to store thinking that it best that the reminder of the woman was removed from where it had been laid out on Ben\u2019s bed for too long.\u00a0 Hop Sing didn\u2019t have any idea that Ben still held onto it due to Marie\u2019s scent still being on the robe.\u00a0 When Ben had asked where it was and had learned that it had been washed and put away, he had been positively inconsolable.\u00a0 Hop Sing had rarely seen Ben Cartwright so livid.\u00a0 It had taken several days before the man would even talk to him.\u00a0 Now, looking over at Ben, Hop Sing realized why he had been awakened to get the robe back.\u00a0 Ben obviously had concluded that he might very well lose the boy just as he had lost Marie.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHop Sing vely sorry, Mister Ben.\u00a0 Not mean cause sadness,\u201d He apologized.\u00a0 \u201cLittle Joe \u2013 he come home \u2013 you no worry.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben had to fight back tears as he looked down at his old friend, a man who had helped him raise his youngest son from a baby.\u00a0 He knew that Hop Sing loved the boy almost as if he were his son.<\/p>\n<p>Coughing to clear the heavy emotion from his voice, Ben replied, \u201cJust \u2013 well \u2013 just let me hold onto this until Joseph returns.\u00a0 We\u2019ll wash it once the boy is back home, okay?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Hop Sing nodded and forced a smile for the other man\u2019s benefit.\u00a0 \u201cAlight \u2013 I wash when Little Joe home, Mister Ben.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben patted the Oriental\u2019s shoulder and turned out of the kitchen.\u00a0 He walked up the backstairs with the robe over his shoulder and took it into his bedroom.\u00a0 Ben knew that it was probably the most ridiculous thing he\u2019d ever done but at that moment he couldn\u2019t have cared less.\u00a0 He just needed something to carry him through the night so he could fall back to sleep.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>I never knew someone who passed out more than I had done the last three days.\u00a0 When I came around, I wasn\u2019t sure what I had been doing before the lights went out.\u00a0 I had to think about it for a couple of minutes as I slowly found my way into the chair.\u00a0 It was then that I remembered that kid and the racket he had made.\u00a0 I was glad that he\u2019d left before I had done anything that I would have regretted.\u00a0 I had more regrets than I needed already.\u00a0 My head felt like it was going to explode from within and that made me sick to my stomach again.\u00a0 I tried to think of something that might help the pain.\u00a0 It was then that I recalled what the man at the trading post had said.\u00a0 I was beginning to think that the blood was pooling inside my head and that it would soon kill me.\u00a0 Just the thought of that filled me with a kind of dread I\u2019d never felt before.\u00a0 I walked outside and noticed that the sun had gone down behind the mountain range to the west.\u00a0 All I could manage to do was to quickly feed Cochise and gather a few more pieces of old dry wood for the night.\u00a0 I was glad to have that old coat as the temperatures had plummeted in the last several hours.\u00a0 I carefully placed the wood that I had scavenged down in front of the stove.\u00a0 I was mindful not to drop it this time so the sound wouldn\u2019t set my teeth on edge like it had the previous day.\u00a0 Filling the coffeepot, I set it back on the stove and hoped that I\u2019d feel like drinking it when it was hot enough.\u00a0 That\u2019s when the thought hit me.\u00a0 If my brain was swelling due to the blood inside my head, then maybe I could do something about it?\u00a0 It was probably a stupid idea caused by the type of pain which was driving me insane.\u00a0 But I decided that it was worth a shot, so I headed outside and over to that handpump.\u00a0 I pulled off my coat and shirt and tossed them closer to the door, trying not to get either of them wet.\u00a0 Then I leaned over and dropped my head underneath the spigot.\u00a0 I pumped water over my head until my hair was absolutely soaked and hanging down into my eyes.\u00a0 As ridiculous as it seemed to be standing in the cold drenching myself, it did make me feel just a tad better.\u00a0 It was probably just wishful thinking, but I did it three more times before heading back inside to dry off in front of the stove.\u00a0 I figured that if it hadn\u2019t helped my head then at the very least it might give me pneumonia which I decided would be a far better way to die.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Fletcher Thompson had worked for the Cartwrights ever since Little Joe was a baby.\u00a0 He had worked his way up from hired hand to ranch foreman and liked the job.\u00a0 Fletcher didn\u2019t just tell other hired hands what to do, he would get his hands dirty just like the rest of them.\u00a0 He was known to be both outspoken and cantankerous and he didn\u2019t mind either of those labels.\u00a0 In fact, he liked it better that way so most of the men on the ranch knew to steer clear of him or at the very least thought better than to give him any guff when they were given an assignment by him.\u00a0 Of course, though he was the foreman he had a boss too, and that was Ben Cartwright.\u00a0 The two men were the same age but that was where all similarities stopped.\u00a0 Ben was known to be an upright and compassionate man who showed great concern for people.\u00a0 Fletcher put forth a great deal of effort trying to make folks think that he was completely the opposite.\u00a0 He loved to rile folks up which would then, in turn, cause them to leave him the heck alone.\u00a0 However, he did like the Cartwrights, all of them, especially his boss.\u00a0 Ben was more like a friend, and someone he considered to be his peer.\u00a0 Fletcher knew that if he had need of anything that all he\u2019d have to do was to ask Ben and the man would go to great lengths just to get it for him.\u00a0 Likewise, Ben had learned over the years that Fletcher would do just about anything for him.\u00a0 So now that Ben had given him the task of finding his youngest boy, the man took that job seriously.\u00a0 That didn\u2019t mean Fletcher wouldn\u2019t fuss and cuss about it, but it was a sure thing that if anyone could find Little Joe it was no doubt the same man who would complain about doing so.<\/p>\n<p>Adam had given Fletcher as much information as he could about Joe\u2019s disappearance, and the man had listened intently.\u00a0 He had ruminated on everything that he had been told before heading out the next day in search of Little Joe.\u00a0 Fletcher focused on the fact that the boy had left without taking much with him including his jacket and Colt revolver.\u00a0 Those were good points but not the pieces of information that he had homed in on.\u00a0 He had mainly paid attention to the fact that Little Joe hadn\u2019t had time to gather much in the way of provisions.\u00a0 He knew the boy well.\u00a0 And because of that Fletcher figured that Little Joe would have a hard time getting by without the creature comforts he was used to having.\u00a0 That meant things like prepared food and coffee.\u00a0 He knew that the boy would only have two options as to where to get any supplies in close proximity to the Ponderosa.\u00a0 The only places to get those types of things within thirty miles were Virginia City and a little trading post just a few miles from the northernmost boundary of the ranch.\u00a0 He was hedging his bet on the fact that Little Joe hadn\u2019t gone too far from home and thus he would go to one of those two locations.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIf\u2019n I was running away from my home \u2013 which I sure wouldn\u2019t do if I had the soft life that you\u2019ve had, Little Joe \u2013 I\u2019d lay low for a spell.\u00a0 Now \u2013 I doubt you\u2019d go on into Virginia City where you and that pinto of yours would be spotted right off.\u00a0 No siree I\u2019d go on up to that trading post and duck out of there fast.\u00a0 Let\u2019s just see how well I know you, you lopped eared stump brained ornery little pampered cuss,\u201d Fletcher muttered and kicked at the sides of his mount.\u00a0 It was still early enough that he could get to the trading post by sometime that afternoon.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>The portly fellow behind the counter at the trading post looked over at the unkept man as he approached.\u00a0 Fletcher, being the kind who didn\u2019t give one hoot about his appearance, wore a shirt that needed a good washing, pants that looked equally as dirty, and sported at least a week\u2019s growth of beard on his face.\u00a0 He smiled broadly knowing who it was.\u00a0 Wiping his hands on his shop apron he readied to welcome him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cFletcher, you old codger \u2013 how have you been?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Nodding to the other man, Fletcher shook his outstretched hand and replied, \u201cDon\u2019t you \u201cold codger\u201d me, Farley!\u00a0 You\u2019ve got better than thirty years on me!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The owner of the store laughed heartily at the boisterous foreman.\u00a0 He had known him for many years, and Fletcher had been one of his first patrons when he had opened the trading post some ten years earlier.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou still a foreman over at the Ponderosa or have they wised up and booted you out?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher shook his head and wearily leaned against the counter.\u00a0 \u201cI ain\u2019t got time for your foolish talk.\u00a0 I need some information if you can stop running your mouth long enough to listen.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay \u2013 okay.\u00a0 Go ahead and spill it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m looking for a kid \u2013 about yey tall and yey wide,\u201d Fletcher motioned with his hands.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThat ain\u2019t much of a description,\u201d Farley groaned.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m not the kind who pays close attention to other men.\u00a0 Now if it was a female type I could tell you all you\u2019d ever need to know right down to the size of her corset,\u201d He paused and looked a bit apprehensively around the store.\u00a0 \u201cThe old shrew ain\u2019t around, is she?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Farley busted out laughing but then stopped abruptly and cast a precarious glance towards the back room before answering.\u00a0 He knew that Fletcher was referring to his wife.\u00a0 \u201cNaw, Shirley is across the street at the livery.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOh?\u00a0 You paying to get new horseshoes put on her?\u201d he quipped.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBetter stop with the insults, Fletcher \u2013 the wife might just pop in here at any moment and take a piece of stove wood to the both of us!\u201d he warned.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay \u2013 getting back to what I come for.\u00a0 The best I can tell you is that the kid\u2019s seventeen and has got a bunch of brown curly hair and rides a pinto.\u00a0 He\u2019s got a Cartwright brand on his hindquarters.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNever met any of them as far as I can recall. \u00a0Of course, I know all about them and the Ponderosa.\u00a0 Let\u2019s see \u2013 yeah \u2013 there was a kid in here.\u00a0 I guess it was two days ago that he came by, and he pretty much fits that description.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t give me a name but, come to think of it, he left on a pinto.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDid he say where he\u2019s staying?\u201d Fletcher\u2019s ears had perked up after hearing what the other man had offered.<\/p>\n<p>Farley shook his head and answered, \u201cNo, didn\u2019t say a heck of a whole lot.\u00a0 But he was feeling poorly.\u00a0 He had an awful headache he said.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cKid deserves a headache after making me chase his ornery pampered hide trying to fetch him back to his pa.\u00a0 What did he get by way of supplies?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNot too much.\u00a0 I sold him some coffee and beans \u2013 some utensils and candles.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThat all?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Farley thought back to what Little Joe had purchased and added, \u201cA coffee pot and cup and oh \u2013 yeah \u2013 kid got a coat off me.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t charge him for it because he looked cold and was just in his shirtsleeves.\u00a0 If I\u2019d known he was a Cartwright, I\u2019d have shown him a coat that was brand new instead of that old moth-eaten thing!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher chuckled and nodded, \u201cI just bet you would \u2013 and charged him a pretty penny for it too!\u00a0 Now which way did he leave \u2013 did you take notice of it?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The man walked past the counter and opened the door, signaling his friend to join him.\u00a0 Fletcher moved over next to him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThe pinto was right out here in front, and he rode off that way,\u201d he said and pointed towards the south.<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher patted the other man\u2019s shoulder and smiled.\u00a0 \u201cThanks, Farley.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou ain\u2019t buying anything from me?\u201d Farley asked frowning as he watched his friend stepping out onto the porch.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGot what I come for,\u201d He replied tersely.\u00a0 \u201cNow why don\u2019t you get back to your work \u2013 you lazy old coot, before your bride hits you with one of her new metal shoes?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Farley just shook his head and grinned.\u00a0 He could clearly see that Fletcher hadn\u2019t changed a bit.\u00a0 He was still just as rude and crude as he always had been.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cStay out of my store!\u201d He shouted to Fletcher, though he wore a big smile on his face while doing so.\u00a0 There was just something about that ornery uncouth man that he had always found to be endearing.<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher waved and walked away laughing.\u00a0 He swung up into his saddle and turned his horse to the south.\u00a0 <strong><em>*** You stupid little varmint!\u00a0 You\u2019re gonna make me hunt down your sorry butt all day, aren\u2019t you?\u00a0 I ain\u2019t got time for this foolishness.\u00a0 Why old Ben wants you back is beyond me.\u00a0 He\u2019s already got two shiftless sons back home, what\u2019s he need with another one? ***<\/em><\/strong> he sighed and kicked his horse\u2019s sides, increasing its pace to a full gallop.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>While the three Cartwrights back at the Ponderosa continued to search for Little Joe, Fletcher was meticulously combing the area due south of the trading post.\u00a0 There weren\u2019t many homesteads in that area, but he found a few that he checked out.\u00a0 However, it wasn\u2019t until he\u2019d stopped at the very last ranch that he finally had some luck.\u00a0 He rode up into the yard in front of the three-room cabin and dismounted.\u00a0 A man who appeared to be in his forties and dressed in rancher&#8217;s garb walked outside and onto his front porch after hearing the approach of a rider.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSomething I can help you with?\u201d He asked, smiling at the stranger.<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher neared the man and held out his hand to him.\u00a0 The two men shook and he replied, \u201cI\u2019m looking for someone and wondered if maybe you\u2019d seen him?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDon\u2019t get many visitors around here,\u201d he returned.\u00a0 \u201cName\u2019s Vinton Kent.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou can just call me Fletcher,\u201d he introduced himself.\u00a0 \u201cLooking for a boy \u2013 about seventeen.\u00a0 Kind of on the puny side and rides a pinto.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>A teenaged boy had just walked out of the barn upon hearing that there was company.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo haven\u2019t seen him.\u00a0 Like I said we don\u2019t get many visitors,\u201d Vinton returned.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHey, Pa!\u201d the boy called out excitedly as he ran over to the two men.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBilly \u2013 no shouting \u2013 we\u2019ve got company,\u201d The boy\u2019s father corrected him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOh \u2013 sorry, Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThis man here asked if we\u2019d seen a young man around here who rides a pinto,\u201d Vinton told his son.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa \u2013 I seen him!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher turned and stared at the blonde headed boy.\u00a0 \u201cWhere?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHe\u2019s staying at the old Winter\u2019s cabin.\u00a0 Don\u2019t you remember me telling you that yesterday, Pa?\u00a0 I met him while I was out hunting.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Vinton patted his son\u2019s head and nodded, \u201cSlipped my mind.\u00a0 You met him at that old rundown cabin and he\u2019s got a pinto \u2013 is that right, Son?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah, Pa.\u00a0 I was out hunting when I saw that somebody must\u2019ve moved into that place.\u00a0 I spotted his horse right off.\u00a0 But the man said that he was feeling poorly so I didn\u2019t get much more than his name.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWho\u2019d he say he was?\u201d Fletcher questioned, hoping that his search was about to be over.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJust said his name was Joe.\u00a0 That was all that I could get out of him.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher hurried down the porch and mounted his horse.\u00a0 \u201cHow far to that cabin, Boy?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Billy pointed to the west and said, \u201cAbout three miles that way.\u00a0 You can\u2019t miss it if you stay on that old dirt path.\u00a0 Hey &#8212; want me to go with you, Mister?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo thanks \u2013 I can manage.\u00a0 I appreciate the help,\u201d Fletcher nodded to Vinton and his son and then hurriedly rode out of the yard.\u00a0 He wanted to get to Little Joe before sunset which was fast approaching.\u00a0 He had some things to say to the boy and none of them would be very kind.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Little Joe had just finished tending to his horse and had gone back inside the cabin.\u00a0 He sat there at the table and tried to catch his breath.\u00a0 His head was absolutely killing him.\u00a0 He leaned forward in the chair and tried to sip the water he\u2019d left inside his cup.\u00a0 It was almost sunset and it had been the roughest day he\u2019d had since falling off the bronc.\u00a0 Joe had tried to will away the pain, but it just kept mounting.\u00a0 He wasn\u2019t sure how many times he had blacked out that day, but he had found himself unexpectedly staring up from his awkward position on the floor more than once.\u00a0 Joe was looking forward to the sun going down and the cabin growing darker hoping that it might help tap down the agony from his wound.\u00a0 Closing his eyes all that he could do was to pray that his suffering would soon be over even if that meant his death.\u00a0 He hadn\u2019t heard the rider out front, but he did hear the loud banging on the door which sent a dagger like sensation throughout his head.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>*** Who in the hell is it this time? As far off the beaten path as this rundown cabin is you\u2019d think I\u2019d be left alone!\u00a0 I hope it\u2019s not that noisy kid again. ***<\/em><\/strong> He thought to himself as he stood from the table.\u00a0 Once again more loud banging assaulted his ears.\u00a0 Joe wanted to call out to whoever was out there and tell them to just go away but his protests would only make matters worse.\u00a0 Little Joe walked to the door and grabbed his rifle before pulling it open.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLittle Joe!\u201d Fletcher shouted, taking one step inside the cabin.\u00a0 \u201cYou deaf?\u00a0 Didn\u2019t you hear me thumping on this here door?\u201d He fumed and scowled at the boy.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHold it down,\u201d Joe whispered insistently.<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher was angry at the boy for making him hunt for him all day and for making his pa worry about his whereabouts.\u00a0 \u201cDon\u2019t you tell me to hold it down, Boy!\u201d he shouted again.<\/p>\n<p>Joe\u2019s face flinched upon hearing the increased volume of the foreman\u2019s rebuke.\u00a0 \u201cI said hold it down, Fletcher.\u00a0 What do you want?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat do I want?\u201d Fletcher returned as he fought his desire to cuff the boy good.\u00a0 \u201cWell, I guess I want to hit you \u2013 that\u2019s what I want!\u00a0 But I guess I\u2019ll leave that for your Pa to do.\u00a0 And I hope old Ben wears you out with that belt of his after that stunt you pulled!\u00a0 You can\u2019t get much lower than to sock your pa in the face and then hightail it out of there so\u2019s he can\u2019t do nothing to you.\u00a0 You lily livered little cuss!\u00a0 I thought you had more guts than that \u2013 I sure was wrong about you, Boy!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGet out,\u201d Joe fired back but kept his tone of voice lowered.\u00a0 The other man\u2019s ear-shattering insults were slicing their way right through his head, and he couldn\u2019t take much more of it.<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher drew closer to the boy and clamped a strong hand down onto his shoulder.\u00a0 \u201cDon\u2019t you tell me to get out you no account little idiot!\u00a0 And I don\u2019t give two figs that you\u2019re a Cartwright.\u00a0 You need to mind your elders. I swear if I had swung on my pa, I\u2019d have no teeth in my mouth after I\u2019d done it.\u00a0 Now get your things before I start cussing. We\u2019re going back to the house right now!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Unable to control his actions due to the fierceness of the pain from his head injury and what the man\u2019s loud remarks had done to him, Little Joe unexpectedly shoved Fletcher out of the cabin.\u00a0 The man missed the porch altogether and landed on the ground having the wind knocked out of him.\u00a0 He looked up from where he had ended up flat on his back in the dirt.\u00a0 He couldn\u2019t believe that the boy would have done what he had.\u00a0 Little Joe would have known better than to rile him.<\/p>\n<p>Slowly pulling himself up off the ground and his face taking on an indignant appearance, Fletcher called up to the boy.\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m done with you, Little Joe!\u00a0 You can just rot out here as far as I care.\u00a0 It\u2019d serve you right!\u201d He yelled as he quickly turned and mounted his horse.\u00a0 The man needed to leave before he did some real damage to his boss\u2019 youngest son.<\/p>\n<p>Not bothering to respond to what Fletcher had said to him, Joe simply walked back inside the cabin and closed the door.\u00a0 He took two steps towards the table and passed out cold.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>The three Cartwrights had endured yet another unproductive day with no clues as to Little Joe\u2019s whereabouts.\u00a0 With heavy hearts they turned in a little after ten p.m. after deciding to get an early start the following day.\u00a0 Ben was about as played out as his sons had ever seen him.\u00a0 He hadn\u2019t eaten a single thing on his dinner plate that night and all that he could talk about was finding his youngest.\u00a0 Hoss and Adam continued to reassure their father that Little Joe would turn up soon but even they were beginning to have their doubts about ever finding the boy.<\/p>\n<p>An hour after the three men had gone to sleep a loud thump on the door awakened everyone inside the house including Hop Sing.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat you want?\u00a0 Vely late!\u201d\u00a0 Hop Sing reprimanded the foreman as he led him inside the house.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGotta see Ben right now, Hop Sing!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cMaybe so you come in morning?\u201d The cook offered as politely as he could at eleven at night.<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher shook his head, getting annoyed with the Oriental who he usually got along with very well.\u00a0 \u201cNo, Hop Sing \u2013 need to talk to Ben now!\u00a0 Go fetch him for me.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cFletcher?\u201d Ben called from the top of the staircase.\u00a0 \u201cWhat is it?\u201d He questioned as he hurried down the stairs and over to the man.\u00a0 \u201cDid you find the boy?\u201d he inquired breathlessly.\u00a0 He studied Fletcher\u2019s face and noticed that it looked as though the man was hopping mad and just about ready to start cussing.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah, I found him alright,\u201d he nodded.\u00a0 \u201cBut he\u2019s in danger, Ben.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Before Ben could say another word, he heard footsteps and turned to see his sons standing over on the stairs.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDid you find Joe?\u201d Hoss called to the foreman as he and Adam hurried down to the living room.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNow I ain\u2019t gonna take questions from this whole house, Ben!\u00a0 You call off those boys of yours if you want to hear this!\u201d He fumed.<\/p>\n<p>Turning around momentarily, Ben waved for his sons to simmer down.\u00a0 He spun back around to face the man and continued, \u201cOkay\u2014now you said that Joseph is in some kind of danger?\u00a0 What kind of danger?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSomeone\u2019s gonna try to kill him, Ben,\u201d he answered, his face forming into a deep scowl.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cKill him?\u00a0 Who\u2019s going to try to kill the boy?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201c<strong><em>I am that\u2019s who<\/em><\/strong>!\u201d Fletcher yelled and came close to spitting on the floor but stopped and rethought his gesture.\u00a0 \u201cYou\u2019d better go fetch that little brat and keep him out of my way or I tell you I\u2019m gonna shoot him down.\u00a0 No \u2013 I take that back.\u00a0 I\u2019m gonna tear him limb from limb and <strong><em>then<\/em><\/strong> shoot him!\u201d<br \/>\nAdam and Hoss exchanged grins over what the man had said.\u00a0 It would seem that their little brother had done something to Fletcher which had really upset him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cCome on over to the fireplace and get warmed up.\u00a0 \u00a0We\u2019ll get you some coffee,\u201d Ben offered trying to calm the man down some, so he\u2019d be able to tell them where the boy was and what he had done to make him so angry.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDon\u2019t want any of your blasted coffee!\u00a0 I want to go to sleep.\u00a0 That little maverick of yours threw me off a porch and now my back hurts.\u00a0 I swear if he\u2019s made my lumbago act up, I\u2019m gonna &#8212;,\u201d he stopped his tirade after getting a good look at his friend\u2019s face.\u00a0 He knew that the man was out of his head with worry over his youngest and decided that he\u2019d fuss more after the kid was brought back home.\u00a0 \u201cJust go fetch him, Ben.\u00a0 He\u2019s up at that old run-down cabin just three or four miles north of the Ponderosa near Simmons Falls.\u00a0 His pinto is out front in a small rope corral you can\u2019t miss it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIs the boy okay?\u201d Ben asked hoping for good news.\u00a0 He could use some after listening to the foreman\u2019s loud tirade.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHe was okay enough to shove me off that porch!\u201d Fletcher was back to being incensed due to all that Little Joe had put him through.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m sorry,\u201d Ben apologized and patted the man\u2019s shoulder.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNot as sorry as that little varmint\u2019s going to be the next time I see him.\u00a0 Might just as well wait until daybreak to go fetch him.\u00a0 Doesn\u2019t look like the kid\u2019s going anywhere.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you for finding him, Fletcher.\u00a0 You go on and turn in.\u00a0 Just take the next few days off so that back of yours will ease up some,\u201d Ben commiserated with the man.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI planned on that \u2013 didn\u2019t need your permission,\u201d He answered gruffly and pulled the door open.\u00a0 \u201cYou\u2019d better tell Little Joe to hide once he\u2019s home \u2013 because if I see him &#8211;,\u201d he trailed off again.\u00a0 Fletcher decided to save his threats for when the boy was home and within range.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll tell him,\u201d Ben nodded and had to fight back his amusement over the foreman\u2019s antics.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNight,\u201d Fletcher muttered and walked out into the darkness.\u00a0 He headed right to the bunkhouse and hoped to forget all about ever knowing one Little Joe Cartwright.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWell, Boys \u2013 I guess we\u2019ll go fetch your brother in the morning.\u00a0 Might just as well get some shuteye,\u201d Ben called across the room.<\/p>\n<p>Adam and Hoss noticed that their father suddenly looked as though he had shaved ten years off his appearance and that he happened to be smiling for the first time in almost a week.\u00a0 It was good to see him like that again.\u00a0 The three men told Hop Sing goodnight for the second time and walked up the stairs.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Hurrying through their breakfast the following day, the three men saddled two mounts and hitched up a team of horses to get the buckboard ready.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI still don\u2019t understand why you\u2019re taking the buckboard, Pa?\u201d Hoss questioned as he swung up to his saddle.\u00a0 \u201cLittle Joe has Cochise, so wouldn\u2019t it be faster to have him ride back here with us?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben shook his head and grabbed the reins as he climbed up into the wagon.\u00a0 \u201cJoseph is going to ride with me.\u00a0 I don\u2019t want to take the chance that the boy might run off again.\u00a0 After going through all this, I\u2019m going to keep my eyes on Joseph. Besides this way the two of us will have time to do some talking on the way back here.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam stared down at his father and smiled knowingly.\u00a0 \u201cWe\u2019ll help you, Pa.\u00a0 Once we get to that little delinquent, we\u2019re not going to let him leave again!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLet\u2019s go, Boys,\u201d Ben urged and slapped the reins to send the team forward.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Once again, I didn\u2019t exactly know what had happened the previous night.\u00a0 I woke up to find myself face-down on the floor again and simply crawled over to my pallet of pine boughs and blankets that wreaked.\u00a0 I guess I passed slap out again shortly thereafter.\u00a0 I could see the light streaming through those lopsided walls again, so I figured that it was the start of another agonizing day.\u00a0 After my run-in with Fletcher, I wished that I could just mount Cochise and ride off before anyone else showed up.\u00a0 Unfortunately, I couldn\u2019t manage that.\u00a0 The way that my head felt I didn\u2019t think it was possible that I\u2019d last another day.\u00a0 I dragged myself over to the stove and decided to try to get it lit so I could once again reheat the same pot of coffee I\u2019d been trying to get down for days.\u00a0 Just standing there at the stove made me wish that I\u2019d had something to poke that hole into my skull myself.\u00a0 I guess it was a good thing that there weren\u2019t any sharp implements inside my saddlebags. \u00a0The pain wasn\u2019t easing up, and I pretty much guessed that the blood under my scalp wasn\u2019t dissipating.\u00a0 I don\u2019t know how long it took but I\u2019d finally got the stove hot enough that the coffee was ready.\u00a0 Taking the tin cup over to the table I sank down and closed my eyes.\u00a0 A couple minutes later I had passed out again.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Pulling up in front of the dilapidated old cabin, Ben glanced over at his two sons.\u00a0 He knew what they were thinking and he wasn\u2019t going along with it.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBoys,\u201d Ben began as he stepped down from the buckboard.\u00a0 \u201cWait outside while I go and talk to your brother.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam and Hoss were quick to dismount and hurried over to their father.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo, Pa!\u201d\u00a0 Hoss protested.\u00a0 \u201cLittle Joe knocked you down the last time you were alone with him.\u00a0\u00a0 We\u2019re not going to let him get the chance to do it again.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHoss is right,\u201d Adam nodded as he stared into his father\u2019s eyes.\u00a0 \u201cHow about letting Hoss and me go in there and bring the kid out to you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Frowning due to his son\u2019s attempt at protecting him, he returned sharply.\u00a0 \u201cDo the two of you really think that I can\u2019t handle that boy?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoe isn\u2019t in his right mind, Pa.\u00a0 If he was, he wouldn\u2019t have thrown a punch at you!\u00a0 On top of that it was just yesterday that he knocked Fletcher down!\u201d\u00a0 Hoss exclaimed, his face filled with worry over his father\u2019s safety.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNow listen \u2013 the both of you!\u201d Ben called out exasperation in his tone of voice.\u00a0 \u201cI am your father and you <strong><em>will<\/em><\/strong> listen to me.\u00a0 It\u2019s bad enough that I have one boy who is disobedient I don\u2019t need the two of you to act up too.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Hoss and Adam exchanged frowns and then caught the stern glare their father was sending their way.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAs I\u2019ve told you \u2013 I\u2019m going in there and talk to the boy.\u00a0 We\u2019ll be out shortly \u2013 but until then you two wait right here,\u201d Ben pointed to where his sons were standing and then headed towards the cabin.\u00a0 Drawing in a deep breath, unsure as to how he\u2019d find the boy inside, he pulled the door open and cautiously entered.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Ben cast an uneasy glance around the darkened room.\u00a0 He spotted the pallet of blankets on the floor and shook his head over the thought of his son sleeping there for days.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t long before he became aware of the atmosphere inside the cabin.\u00a0 It had a strange ethereal feel to it.\u00a0 Ben couldn\u2019t explain why the dim light in the room had suddenly taken on a sacred aura to it.\u00a0\u00a0 He felt as though he was walking towards an altar in some old cathedral and not merely crossing the floor to check on his youngest son.\u00a0 As he drew closer it all began to make complete sense to him.\u00a0 Ben had always believed in the sanctity of life, and he had been gifted three lives from three different women.\u00a0 There wasn\u2019t anything in the world more sacred to him than his sons and one of them had been missing from the fold for far too long.\u00a0 It was time to reclaim the boy no matter what had happened between the two of them. Fatherly instinct, his well-developed ability to see past the superficial had begun to kick in.\u00a0 Deep down inside he knew that whatever was going on with his youngest was much more than Joseph just wanting to escape from being punished due to his actions there on the ranch.<\/p>\n<p>There wasn\u2019t a sound other than the faint breathing coming from the boy sitting there at the table \u00a0\u00a0His son\u2019s head was resting on top of his folded arms and he hadn\u2019t shown any sign that he had heard his father entering the room.\u00a0 Moving closer and getting a better look at him, Ben wondered why Joseph was wearing an old gray rumpled-looking coat which appeared to be at least three sizes too big for him.\u00a0 Unsure as to how the boy would react to his presence, he did the only thing that he could think of at the time.\u00a0 He gently swept his right hand across Joe\u2019s left shoulder until it came to rest on his neck.\u00a0 Then his fingers rhythmically began to knead the tight muscles there.\u00a0 His ministrations were rewarded by the boy\u2019s soft groan and an almost imperceptible nod of his head.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoseph?\u201d He called out, intuitively using a hushed tone of voice.\u00a0 Ben just presumed that there was a need for quiet, though he didn\u2019t exactly know why.\u00a0 \u201cJoseph \u2013 it\u2019s Pa.\u201d\u00a0 He continued to massage the boy\u2019s neck hoping to illicit a response.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa?\u201d Joe responded, his voice sounding both hoarse and dry.\u00a0 He attempted to pull himself out from underneath the intense pain which was weighing him down.\u00a0 \u201cPa?\u201d He whispered again and his father could tell that he was very disoriented.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m right here beside you, Son,\u201d Ben returned softly, never taking his hand off the boy\u2019s neck.\u00a0 He continued his motions, still massaging Joe\u2019s neck hoping to instill calm in him.\u00a0 Ben was unclear what was going on with his son and how he would react once he became fully cognizant that he was no longer alone in the room.\u00a0 The last time he had laid eyes on Joseph, the boy had reached out and struck him.\u00a0 However, Ben wasn\u2019t going to condemn him for his actions until he heard the reason for them directly from the boy\u2019s own mouth.<\/p>\n<p>Lifting his head a tad higher, Joe whispered, \u201cPa \u2013 I didn\u2019t mean to &#8212; I swear to you I didn\u2019t mean to do it.\u201d\u00a0 Though his son\u2019s words had been said in a hushed tone of voice they had still come out with a palpable feeling of sorrow to them.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cEasy, Boy \u2013 easy.\u00a0 Everything\u2019s going to be okay,\u201d Ben crooned still lowering the volume to his voice.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI should\u2019ve told you, Pa \u2013 it\u2019s all my fault.\u00a0 I should\u2019ve told you right after it happened.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cTold me what, Son?\u00a0 What happened?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThat day out at the breaking corral.\u00a0 I fell off one of the horses, Pa.\u00a0 I fell and hit the back of my head on a rock.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t realize how bad I\u2019d hurt myself.\u00a0 I should\u2019ve told you &#8212; I\u2019m sorry, Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben\u2019s face froze up with fear due to the frightening remembrance of the boy\u2019s mother and how she had taken a fall from a horse too; the fall which had ended her life.\u00a0 \u201cOh, Joseph!\u201d He gasped.\u00a0 \u201cYou mean you\u2019ve been lying here hurt this whole time?\u201d\u00a0 Just the very idea that his son had been alone and in pain from a head wound all week made Ben\u2019s chest seize up with an all-too-familiar kind of foreboding.<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe nodded as he placed his hands over his eyes trying to combat the blinding pain.\u00a0 \u201cI don\u2019t know why I hit you, Pa.\u00a0 I swear I didn\u2019t remember doing it that night \u2013 and I still don\u2019t remember throwing that punch at you.\u00a0 I only know that you were there in my bedroom talking to me one minute and then the next minute Hoss and Adam were yelling at me about something.\u00a0 When I saw you lying there on the floor, I had no idea that it was because of what I had done to you.\u201d\u00a0 The tears which he had purposely kept at bay were suddenly coursing down Joe\u2019s cheeks.\u00a0 He was contending with the severe pain that was causing his head to throb along with the dreadful reminder of what he had done to his father; the man he loved more than his own life.\u00a0 He dropped his head back down on his arms and wept.\u00a0 \u201cPa \u2013 Pa I\u2019d sooner die than to hurt you,\u201d he choked out, so swept up in the fact that up till then he never thought he\u2019d see his father again.\u00a0 All week long Joe had truly believed that he was going to die from his injury.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOh, Joseph,\u201d Ben whispered and carefully placed his hand there on top of his son\u2019s head.\u00a0 He gently brushed back the unruly curls and said, \u201cI know that, Son.\u00a0 Once more I knew that you didn\u2019t mean to do it &#8212; even that night when it happened.\u00a0 I know you\u2019d never purposely try to hurt me, Boy.\u00a0 But none of that matters to me right now.\u00a0 All I care about is you. \u00a0Now, how bad is that head wound of yours?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>It had taken a tremendous effort on his part, but Joe finally lifted his head off his arms and tried to home in on his father\u2019s face.\u00a0 Though the cabin was dark the sunlight streaming through the cracks in the lopsided walls provided just enough light.\u00a0 Pa was kneeling alongside him, so that they were face to face.\u00a0 As far as Joe was concerned his father should be furious with him over what he had done.\u00a0 But instead of seeing anger or even hurt on the man\u2019s face Pa wore the same expression that Little Joe had seen there all his life.\u00a0 His father was looking at him with a calm loving smile on his lips.\u00a0 The next minute Pa swept him up into his arms, as he whispered that everything was going to be alright.\u00a0 Joe didn\u2019t speak for a long while and neither did his father.\u00a0 He knew that they needed to get some things straightened out between them but the move on his father\u2019s part had been just what Little Joe had yearned for all along.\u00a0 No longer was there a matter of reconciliation to address because Joe realized that he\u2019d already found it there inside his father\u2019s embrace.<\/p>\n<p>Ben finally spoke again in the same soothing tone of voice, \u201cNow tell me about the pain, Joseph,\u201d He insisted and pulled the boy back ever so slightly trying not to hurt him with the motion.\u00a0 It was dreadfully clear to Ben that Little Joe was suffering terribly due to his injury; however, he needed some facts before knowing how to proceed with his care.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa \u2013 right now I\u2019m trying hard not to blackout again.\u00a0 There\u2019s never any warning before one of those spells hits me.\u00a0 It blindsides me and there\u2019s nothing I can do to stop it once it starts up.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHow long do they last \u2013 those blackouts of yours?\u00a0 Do you have any idea?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSometimes I\u2019m out for hours, Pa \u2013 and sometimes it just knocks me out for a few minutes,\u201d Joe answered sullenly staring into his father\u2019s compassion filled eyes.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAnd the pain, Joseph?\u00a0 How bad is it?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe tried once again to prevent the tears from leaving his eyes.\u00a0 He bit at his bottom lip as his whole face trembled.\u00a0 \u201cIt\u2019s bad, Pa \u2013 really bad.\u00a0 Sometimes it\u2019s all that I can do just to remember to breathe.\u00a0 My head is killing me, and it\u2019s not stopped all this time.\u00a0 There are things that make it worse &#8212; I can\u2019t take sunlight \u2013 or even lamplight.\u00a0 I\u2019ve been using candles, but sometimes they set me off too.\u00a0 But even worse than light is sound \u2013 any sound but especially loud noises.\u00a0 Oh, Pa!\u00a0 It sends a sharp stabbing pain straight through to my brain,\u201d He choked out.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHush now &#8212; it\u2019s all going to be okay,\u201d Ben attempted to calm his boy with his deep baritone voice.\u00a0 His thoughts went back to that night in Little Joe\u2019s bedroom, and suddenly it all made some sense to him.\u00a0 \u201cJoseph, that night \u2013 the night that you left.\u00a0 I was talking to you \u2013 just like you remember me doing.\u00a0 But I got so aggravated with you because you wouldn\u2019t level with me about why you\u2019d been acting so strangely.\u00a0 I got so irritated that I put my hand on your shoulder and gave you a little shove to get you to lie back so I could check you over.\u00a0 I hadn\u2019t done it intentionally, but I think that little push made you hit the back of your head on your headboard.\u00a0 It was only then that you flailed your fist out at me.\u00a0 Your head hitting that hard wood must\u2019ve set you off.\u00a0 It must\u2019ve been the fact that I did that along with my shouting at you that caused you to do what you did, Son.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t deliberately cause you to hit that wound of yours no more than you deliberately meant to hit me.\u00a0 It just happened.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Forcing his eyes closed due to the tears that were spilling out from them, Joe shook his head and remorsefully replied, \u201cPa \u2013 no matter what you did that night \u2013 I had no business hitting you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSon \u2013 none of that was your fault.\u00a0 And now that we know why it happened, we\u2019re just going to put all that behind us.\u00a0 As far as I\u2019m concerned, it never happened.\u00a0 Now \u2013 getting back to that pain.\u00a0 It hasn\u2019t let up at all \u2013 not since you got hurt?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo, Pa, and I can\u2019t hardly stand it anymore. But I\u2019m not going to let them cut a hole in my head.\u00a0 I just can\u2019t!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben stared at his son, perplexed by what he had just said.\u00a0 \u201cJoseph?\u00a0 What are you talking about?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI met a man whose cousin had the exact same thing happen to him.\u00a0 He fell off a horse and hit his head on a rock.\u00a0 The doctor said it caused bleeding inside of his head and if he hadn\u2019t gotten a hole poked through his skull to drain off that blood he would have died.\u00a0 Pa \u2013 he had the same blinding headaches \u2013 the blackouts \u2013 the agonizing pain as I have now.\u00a0 But \u2013 I just can\u2019t do it \u2013 I can\u2019t let them cut me up like that,\u201d Joe insisted, his voice steeped in panic.\u00a0 It was then that he felt his father\u2019s strong arms pulling him to his chest trying to allay his worry.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoseph \u2013 no two situations are ever the same.\u00a0 Just because that man fell from a horse and hit his head doesn\u2019t mean that you have the same type of an injury that he had.\u00a0 It\u2019s never a good idea to try to come up with your own diagnosis.\u00a0 Let\u2019s bring you on home and have Doc take a look at you, okay?\u00a0 I\u2019m sure that he\u2019ll be able to fix you up.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBut what if he says that he needs to cut a hole in my head, Pa?\u201d He continued, his voice trembling due to his ever-increasing fear.<\/p>\n<p>Ben softly combed his fingers through the boy\u2019s hair attempting to ease his fear. \u201cIt\u2019s going to be alright \u2013 have faith, Son,\u201d he whispered.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ve been trying, Pa \u2013 but it\u2019s been so hard.\u00a0 I\u2019ve been praying every night that I\u2019d wake up, and my head would be better \u2013 but it\u2019s only gotten worse.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Holding the boy close to him, Ben wished that he could absorb his son\u2019s pain into his own body.\u00a0 He knew that Little Joe had always toughed out any injury with very little complaint and he had always been brave concerning any treatment that he had been forced to endure.\u00a0 But this time the boy was overwhelmed and exhausted due to days of extreme and unrelenting pain.\u00a0 Ben reasoned that Joe might not be thinking very clearly and he couldn\u2019t blame him.\u00a0 The prospect of having a hole drilled into their skull would quite naturally scare anyone.<\/p>\n<p>Ben gently lifted his son\u2019s chin and stared into his eyes.\u00a0 \u201cWhy did you leave home Joseph?\u00a0 You shouldn\u2019t have tried to handle all this by yourself.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI couldn\u2019t get what I\u2019d done to you out of my head, Pa.\u00a0 I was afraid.\u00a0 I was afraid that I might end up hurting you again.\u00a0 So, I tried to find a place that would be far enough away from you that you\u2019d never be able to find me,\u201d He confessed sadly.<\/p>\n<p>Tilting his head a bit, a smile filtered down onto Ben\u2019s lips.\u00a0 \u00a0He placed the palm of his right hand onto Little Joe\u2019s face and whispered, \u201cAlways know that I would find a way to get to where you are.\u00a0 Joseph, <strong><em>there\u2019s no place that far<\/em><\/strong>.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe read the determination on his father\u2019s face and nodded over to him that he understood what he had just said.\u00a0 He finally realized that Pa would have searched for him no matter how hard he had tried to hide from him.\u00a0 It was now obvious to Little Joe that his father loved him unconditionally no matter what had transpired between the two of them.\u00a0 He brushed away his tears on the sleeve of his coat and drew in a deep breath knowing that it was finally time to go back home and face whatever his prognosis might be.<\/p>\n<p>Ben coughed into his fist to clear the heavy emotion in his voice and whispered, \u201cI\u2019m going outside for just a minute and then the four of us are going to head home.\u00a0 You just sit right here and don\u2019t move.\u00a0 I won\u2019t be long.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cFour?\u00a0 You mean Hoss and Adam are outside?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSure, they are.\u00a0 They\u2019ve missed you too, you know?\u201d Ben insisted as he stood from where he had been kneeling next to his son.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBut Pa &#8211;,\u201d Joe paused, his expression revealing his worry over the prospect of being confronted by his brothers.\u00a0 \u201cThey\u2019re both mad at me because of what I did to you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben dropped a hand down onto the boy\u2019s shoulder and offered a reassuring smile.\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019ll clear up all of that before we get you out into the buckboard.\u00a0 Now you just rest for a minute \u2013 and stop worrying.\u201d<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>I watched as my father walked out through the cabin\u2019s only door.\u00a0 I had so much on my mind at the time that I couldn\u2019t think straight.\u00a0 I wondered what my brothers would have to say to me once I made it outside.\u00a0 Pa had told me that he\u2019d explain everything to them, and I knew that he would try his best.\u00a0 But no matter what, the plain fact was that I had hit him and there wasn\u2019t much of anything that he could say to dispute that.\u00a0 I had a hard time believing that Pa had even found me that day.\u00a0 One minute I had passed out cold and the next minute there he was telling me that everything was going to be alright!\u00a0 It was just like one of those heroes who always seems to save the day in the final chapter when everything seems hopeless just like in one of Adam\u2019s novels.\u00a0 But that was my pa, he\u2019d always been my hero anyhow.\u00a0 But I hated to bring this kind of trouble back home with me especially because my future was uncertain.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t even know if I was going to live.\u00a0 The pain had increased so much over the last few days that I didn\u2019t think that I could take too much more.\u00a0 I knew that Doctor Martin would be summoned to the ranch house and he\u2019d do whatever he could to help me.\u00a0 I just hoped that didn\u2019t mean drilling a hole through my skull.\u00a0 Of course, by then I almost wished that he would suggest doing that if it meant that I\u2019d finally be free of the fierce pain that wouldn\u2019t ease up.\u00a0 I was now going to be in the capable hands of the good doctor and under the overly protective supervision of my father who wasn\u2019t about to let me die if he could help it.\u00a0 The rest, like Pa had told me, was a matter of faith.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>\u201cAdam, you go fetch Doc and get home as quickly as you can,\u201d Ben said as he watched his eldest climbing up into his saddle.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI will, Pa.\u00a0 Hey will you tell the kid &#8211;,\u201d Adam paused as he searched for the right words to say.\u00a0 His father had explained it all to both him and Hoss and now he was filled with regret for the things that he had said about Little Joe.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll tell him,\u201d Ben nodded knowing full well where his son was going with his statement without even having to complete it.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay\u2014see you three at home.\u00a0 Take it easy getting back,\u201d Adam called and kicked at Sport\u2019s sides hurrying to get to the doctor.<\/p>\n<p>Hoss set his hand on his father\u2019s shoulder in a show of support.\u00a0 It was very easy to tell that Pa was worried about Joe\u2019s condition.\u00a0 \u201cWe\u2019ll get him all fixed up, Pa.\u00a0 Don\u2019t worry \u2013 Little Joe is about as tough as they come.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you, Boy,\u201d Ben nodded gratefully.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m going to bring him out now.\u00a0 You go and tie Cochise\u2019s reins to the back of the wagon.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI could tote Joe out here for you, Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Staring up at the sky Ben wished that there was more cloud cover.\u00a0 He knew that sunlight would affect his son\u2019s injury.\u00a0 \u201cNo, Hoss.\u00a0 I\u2019ll bring your brother out here.\u00a0 But we could use your slicker.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Hoss looked over at his father confused.\u00a0 \u201cHuh?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJust get it out from behind your saddle, Son.\u00a0 I\u2019ll have your brother put it over him to block this sunlight some.\u00a0 Now remember \u2013 just whisper if you\u2019ve got to say something to him, okay?\u00a0 Noise of any kind makes his head hurt worse.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay, Pa.\u00a0 I\u2019ll put it inside the wagon and then get Cochise ready,\u201d He replied and turned towards his horse.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThanks, Hoss,\u201d Ben patted the big man\u2019s shoulder and turned to go back into the cabin.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>\u201cAdam left to fetch Doc and he wanted me to tell you that he\u2019s sorry.\u00a0 In fact, both your brothers are sorry.\u00a0 But they didn\u2019t understand what you\u2019ve been going through any more than I did,\u201d Ben whispered as he drew closer to his youngest.\u00a0 \u201cHoss is getting Cochise ready to leave.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay, Pa,\u201d Joe returned and hesitantly pulled himself up from the chair.<\/p>\n<p>Ben was quick to catch the boy\u2019s elbow to steady him.\u00a0 \u201cLet\u2019s take this slow, Joseph.\u00a0 There\u2019s no need to rush.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll be alright,\u201d Joe nodded and soon felt his father\u2019s hand moving from his elbow to his shoulder to guide him outside.\u00a0 The two of them started towards the door when, without any warning, the boy passed out cold.<\/p>\n<p>Caught by surprise, Ben just barely had enough time to catch his son before he hit the floor.\u00a0 He wrapped his arms around Little Joe and eased him down.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>*** Oh, Joseph! ***<\/em><\/strong> he thought and his face took on a stricken appearance due to his fear for the boy.\u00a0 He knew that he\u2019d have to have some help, so he carefully spread his son out on the floor and hurried to the door.<\/p>\n<p>A few minutes later Hoss had his little brother held in his arms and carried him to the bed of the wagon where Pa had spread the blankets that Joe had used to sleep on.\u00a0 He realized that it wasn\u2019t much by way of a cushion, but he presumed that it was better than nothing.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI got him,\u201d Hoss whispered and gently laid his brother out inside the buckboard.\u00a0 \u201cI was thinking \u2013 maybe we should tie Chub\u2019s and Cochise\u2019s reins to the railing and that way I could drive the wagon while you sit back here in case Little Joe comes back around?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGood idea, Son,\u201d Ben agreed and crawled inside the bed of the buckboard.\u00a0 \u201cLeast ways I\u2019ll be able to block the sun if he comes to before we get home.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Hoss hurried to get the horses squared away and then stepped up to the bench seat.\u00a0 \u201cI can\u2019t say that it ain\u2019t gonna be a bumpy ride, Pa \u2013 but I\u2019ll do the best that I can to avoid the ruts in the road.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHopefully your little brother will stay under for a while,\u201d Ben called to his son and then leaned back against the bed of the wagon.\u00a0 Easing out of his vest, he rolled it up and placed it underneath his son\u2019s head to cushion it some.\u00a0 Then he simply sat there next to Little Joe and prayed.\u00a0 He knew that it was the only proactive thing that he could do for his boy until they were safely back home.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>I came back around to the ear shattering sound of a team of horses and the creaking from the wooden bed of the buckboard.\u00a0 I was about to jump out of the wagon and run away from the noise until I felt Pa\u2019s hands on my shoulders trying to hold me down.\u00a0 With one look at his face, I knew that he was going to do his darndest to keep me from bolting.\u00a0 It was then that I spotted the bruise that I\u2019d left on Pa\u2019s face due to that punch I had thrown almost a week ago.\u00a0 It gave me a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach and only made me feel worse than I already did at the time; and that was a lot.\u00a0 How my father could be so forgiving was beyond me.\u00a0 He had said that as far as he was concerned, I hadn\u2019t hit him.\u00a0 Pa was going to forget that it had ever happened.\u00a0 Maybe he could forget all about it, but I knew that I never would.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s okay, Joseph \u2013 just settle down now.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Squeezing his eyes closed Joe answered his father\u2019s plea, \u201cPa &#8212; the noise \u2013 it\u2019s killing me.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben looked up at the sky and noticed that the sun was beginning to set.\u00a0 The ride from the cabin to the ranch house would\u2019ve taken about two hours on horseback but it was going to take a whole lot longer by wagon.\u00a0 Ben knew that they still had a good hour or so to go.<\/p>\n<p>Hoss turned around in his seat upon hearing his brother\u2019s voice.\u00a0 He could easily spot the pain spreading all over the boy\u2019s face and it grieved his heart.\u00a0 Hoss knew that Little Joe had been put through the mill due to his head wound according to what Pa had relayed.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWon\u2019t be long now, Short Shanks.\u00a0 I\u2019ll get you home just as quick as I can,\u201d He whispered soothingly.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHere, Son,\u201d Ben began and grabbed Hoss\u2019 slicker.\u00a0 \u201cI can\u2019t do much about the sound of the team of horses but maybe if you\u2019ll hold this up to your eyes it\u2019ll help with the light.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa \u2013 it\u2019s bad,\u201d Joe groaned as he accepted the slicker and held it up to his face.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>About that time, I felt my father gently easing me into his arms.\u00a0 He was leaning against the back of the wagon bed with his legs stretched out in front of him. Not knowing what else to do for me, he made a last-ditch effort to provide some relief by holding me to his chest and tightly wrapping his arms around my shoulders.\u00a0 I could tell that he was trying his best to shield me from the pain I was going through.\u00a0 He couldn\u2019t.\u00a0 I turned my head and buried my face on top of my father\u2019s right shoulder and then I closed my eyes again.\u00a0 Pa\u2019s fingers gently combed through my hair like he was trying to push aside the pain from my wound.\u00a0 I knew that old familiar gesture very well.\u00a0 Pa did it all the time, especially when I was injured or sick.\u00a0 I guess he\u2019d always known that it would help settle me down, and it was working once again.\u00a0 I attempted to drown out the sounds around me and soon all I heard was my father\u2019s breathing and every now and then his heartbeat.\u00a0 It was enough.\u00a0 Then the only thing I was concentrating on was how lucky I was to have my family.\u00a0 My brothers had obviously forgiven me.\u00a0 I could tell it by the way Hoss looked at me the minute he realized that I was awake.\u00a0 Pa had told me earlier that Adam had said that he was sorry and I believed him.\u00a0 That helped.\u00a0 But the main thing that gave me the will to try to endure all the pain I was dealing with was the fact that my father, the one who I had blindsided with that punch, hadn\u2019t missed a beat in assuring me that I was forgiven.\u00a0 No matter what Doc Martin was going to tell me as far as a prognosis, at least I had all that going for me.\u00a0 Not everyone is lucky enough to have the kind of family that I have.\u00a0 It\u2019s like Pa has always said, we are all blessed.\u00a0 He\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>The buckboard pulled up in front of the ranch house later that evening.\u00a0 Though the fact that he was unconscious at the time worried Ben, at least Little Joe was oblivious to the fact that they were home, and that he was being carried inside.\u00a0 Ben was sure that the boy, though badly injured, would have protested the fact that his pa was carrying him up the stairs.\u00a0 He was relieved to have gotten Little Joe into his bed without any complaints.<\/p>\n<p>Removing first his son\u2019s boots and then his belt, Ben tried to make Little Joe as comfortable as he could manage for the present.\u00a0 He\u2019d wait on getting a nightshirt on him until after the doctor checked him over good.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat do we do now?\u201d Hoss asked as he watched his father easing his brother underneath the sheet and blanket.<\/p>\n<p>Ben sighed and shook his head wearily.\u00a0 He turned and faced his middle boy.\u00a0 \u201cI guess all we can do now is just wait for Doc to get here.\u00a0 I suppose we should tell Hop Sing about the noise situation, so he doesn\u2019t come up here yelling out in Chinese.\u00a0 I don\u2019t want this boy waking up to that.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Hoss turned to the door, \u201cI\u2019ll go tell him, Pa.\u00a0 And I\u2019ll see if he can fetch us some coffee while we wait.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThanks, Son,\u201d Ben smiled gratefully and then sank down into the chair next to the bed.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Doctor Paul Martin stood in the living room of the ranch house later that evening and listened to what Ben had to say about what Little Joe had gotten himself into this time.\u00a0 He had doctored the youngest Cartwright boy ever since the day he was born and had spent many nights there inside his bedroom.\u00a0 There had been many suggestions over the years that Paul should have his own bedroom and that perhaps he should set up his office there since he had been such a regular visitor to the ranch.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cFive days, is that right?\u201d Paul asked, his face showing concern.<\/p>\n<p>Ben nodded, \u201cYes \u2013 he got hurt and left that same night.\u00a0 We only found and brought him home today.\u00a0 Joe says the pain is something awful and the slightest noise sets him off.\u00a0 He\u2019s apparently had spells where he blacks out cold without warning.\u00a0 I witnessed him having one today just as we were getting ready to leave that cabin where he\u2019d been staying.\u00a0 And the boy had two more on the way here.\u00a0 \u00a0Light bothers him too, Paul.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Doc mulled over what the worried father had told him and finally shook his head.\u00a0 \u201cDoesn\u2019t sound much like a concussion, Ben.\u00a0 It\u2019s gone on too long and the fact that the pain\u2019s only gotten worse isn\u2019t normal.\u00a0 Well \u2013 let\u2019s go see the boy.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben led the other man over to the stairs, and they walked up to Little Joe\u2019s room where both Hoss and Adam were waiting.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSounds like he\u2019s just coming around now, Pa,\u201d Hoss whispered and moved away from the bed to give the doctor some room.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhy don\u2019t you two boys go grab some supper?\u00a0 I\u2019ll be down just as soon as Paul\u2019s done.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam stood from the chair and gave his father\u2019s shoulder a reassuring pat before leaving the room.\u00a0 \u201cThe kid will be alright, Pa \u2013 don\u2019t worry.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben nodded as he watched his sons walking out into the hall.\u00a0 He turned his attention back to the boy on the bed.<\/p>\n<p>Paul listened to his patient\u2019s heart as Little Joe slowly made his way back to consciousness.\u00a0 He checked for a fever and shook his head when he noticed the questioning look on Ben\u2019s face.\u00a0 \u201cNo fever,\u201d Doc whispered.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa?\u201d Joe whispered, wondering how he\u2019d gotten in his bed.\u00a0 Everything was a hazy blur due to the constant pain he had been in.\u00a0 The last thing he could recall was being inside the buckboard and the extremely loud sound coming from the team of horses.<\/p>\n<p>Ben dropped a hand down onto his son\u2019s arm to instill calm in him.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m right here, Boy \u2013 so is Doc.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe squinted up to see Doc Martin hovering over him.\u00a0 He forced a smile even though his head was hurting like the blue blazes.\u00a0 \u201cHi, Doc.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHi yourself,\u201d Paul grinned.\u00a0 \u201cYour Pa has told me about that fall that you took, Little Joe. Now why\u2019d you hide that from him?\u00a0 You know you should always say something whenever you get hurt.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo lectures until my head stops throbbing, okay?\u201d Joe whispered with a frown on his lips.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDeal,\u201d Doc nodded.\u00a0 \u201cSo \u2013 you\u2019re hurting pretty bad, huh, Joe?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah \u2013 but I don\u2019t really want you or anyone else to poke a hole in my skull.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Paul turned back and looked at Ben, his face filled with confusion.\u00a0 \u201cWhat\u2019s that again?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoseph thinks you\u2019re going to have to drill some sort of hole in his head to relieve the pressure he\u2019s feeling.\u00a0 While he was out there hiding from his poor old pa he ran into someone who knew somebody who had to have that kind of surgery,\u201d Ben explained.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYoung Man, until you finish medical school I don\u2019t want to hear about you diagnosing anyone \u2013 not even yourself,\u201d Paul reprimanded and then grabbed the lamp that was sitting on the nightstand.\u00a0 \u201cThis isn\u2019t going to be pleasant, Joe, but I need to check those eyes of yours.\u00a0 I promise to turn this wick down and get the light out of your eyes just as soon as I can.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>His face wincing in preparation for the examination, Joe bit his lip and nodded to the doctor.\u00a0 Then one by one, Paul checked his pupils to see if they were slow to dilate and to gauge how bad the light affected the boy.<\/p>\n<p>Doc set the lamp back down and turned the wick knob to lower the flame.\u00a0 \u201cI take it that hurt you quite a bit?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe nodded and had to close his eyes to try to recover from that part of the exam.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay, Joe \u2013 that part\u2019s over.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank God,\u201d He whispered still trying to fight back the increased pain.<\/p>\n<p>Ben stood on the opposite side of the bed and gently squeezed his son\u2019s arm again.\u00a0 \u201cEasy, Son, the examination is going to be over soon,\u201d He reassured the boy.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYour pa said you\u2019ve been having blackouts, is that right?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe nodded.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHow often, Little Joe?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>With a slight shrug to his shoulders, he responded, \u201cEvery day since I got hurt, Doc.\u00a0 Sometimes two or three of them a day.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Paul simply nodded and then said, \u201cI\u2019m going to need you to roll over onto your stomach now.\u00a0 Just put your face into that pillow of yours for a minute, Joe.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Following Paul\u2019s instructions, Little Joe planted his face in his pillow and waited for whatever was going to happen next.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNow take the pointer finger of your left hand and show me where you hit the rock when you fell.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Once again, the boy did as he was told and pointed at the base of his skull.\u00a0 \u201cThere,\u201d he whispered and groaned from the slight pressure from his finger.<\/p>\n<p>Paul methodically examined the area where his patient had indicated and then went about probing the entirety of Joe\u2019s skull.\u00a0 He shot a quick glance across the bed at Ben and frowned.\u00a0 \u201cThat\u2019s fine, Little Joe.\u00a0 Just slowly ease over onto your back again because I\u2019m going to give you something for that pain.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat\u2019s going on?\u201d Joe\u2019s concern had heightened after noticing the worried looks going back and forth between the two men at either side of his bed.\u00a0 \u201cDo you know what\u2019s wrong with me, Doc?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Sighing, Paul nodded to the boy and replied, \u201cLittle Joe, you sure did hit that head of yours hard.\u00a0 You have what\u2019s known as a skull fracture.\u00a0 There\u2019s a bit of an indention right where you pointed.\u00a0 It\u2019s not too deep though.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben closed his eyes upon hearing the diagnosis.\u00a0 He had heard about skull fractures and had even watched a man die from one after falling from the crow\u2019s nest on one of the clipper ships he had commanded years ago.<\/p>\n<p>Doc watched the appearance of dread as it leapt from Ben to Joe.\u00a0 He could tell that they were both frightened due to his diagnosis.\u00a0 \u201cIt\u2019s a mild one, Little Joe \u2013 don\u2019t you or your pa go to thinking the worst.\u00a0 It will heal in time,\u201d Paul opened his medical bag and drew out a bottle of laudanum and a tablespoon.\u00a0 \u201cNow you take some of this and it should make you feel better than you have in days.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe accepted the medicine hoping that the doctor was right and that he\u2019d get out of some of the pain.\u00a0 Even a little bit of relief would have been welcomed.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat can be done about it, Paul?\u201d Ben was finally able to ask after taking a few minutes to digest the diagnosis and come to terms with it.\u00a0 He also had sent up a quick prayer for his son\u2019s recovery much as he had from the minute he had found the boy up in the cabin.<\/p>\n<p>Paul turned and stared directly into his old friend\u2019s eyes and gave just a slight shake to his head letting the man know that he wanted to talk somewhere out of earshot from his patient.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOh \u2013 I\u2019ve got some ideas.\u00a0 Little Joe \u2013 is that laudanum helping any yet?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cMaybe a little bit, Doc,\u201d Joe nodded and then closed his eyes.\u00a0 He was trying to fight back his earlier fears, but he couldn\u2019t help thinking about the man who had surgery due to his injury.\u00a0 \u201cAre you going to have to cut through my head, Doc?\u00a0 I need to know.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Doc reached down and placed a hand on the boy\u2019s arm.\u00a0 \u201cLittle Joe, I\u2019ve always told you the truth \u2013 haven\u2019t I?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Nodding again, Little Joe opened his eyes and stared at the doctor.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI won\u2019t have to cut any hole in your head, so I want you to stop thinking about that, okay?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI want you to rest, you hear?\u00a0 I\u2019m going downstairs with your pa to get some coffee.\u00a0 Meanwhile you just lie still and let that medicine ease the pain and then we\u2019ll discuss how we\u2019ll get you well again.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAnd I\u2019m not going to die either?\u201d Joe choked out as a few tears escaped his eyes.<\/p>\n<p>Doc and Ben exchanged concerned glances and both men moved closer to the boy in the bed.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLittle Joe, you are not going to die.\u00a0 I can imagine that it\u2019s been frightening for you \u2013 worrying about your prognosis due to the terrible pain that you\u2019ve been dealing with.\u00a0 But you\u2019re going to be fine.\u00a0 It\u2019s just going to take time.\u00a0 Now close those eyes, Boy, and let that laudanum work.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben reached down and swept a hand across his son\u2019s forehead, pushing aside his fallen bangs.\u00a0 \u201cYou heard Doc, Joseph.\u00a0 Now listen to me, you\u2019re going to be just fine.\u00a0 We\u2019re going to get some coffee and then come right back up here.\u00a0 I want to see you sound asleep when I come back, okay?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay, Pa,\u201d He whispered and swept one of his shirtsleeves across his face to wipe away his tears.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBe right back,\u201d Ben assured his son and both he and Doc quietly walked out of the bedroom.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>So, there they were.\u00a0 Ben Cartwright and Doctor Paul Martin, the two men who have been by my side with every single injury or illness I\u2019ve had over the last seventeen years.\u00a0 Both of them cared about me and I trusted both of them with my life.\u00a0 Doc had always told me straight \u2013 no matter what the prognosis was, he\u2019d never lied to me.\u00a0 And then there was Pa.\u00a0 Of course, being overly protective of me he sometimes sugarcoated his words, but he generally told me the truth.\u00a0\u00a0 But I had noticed the look on Pa\u2019s face right before he had walked away from my bed.\u00a0 There was just a hint of fear on his face when I spotted him looking over at Doc.\u00a0 I knew that they were going to discuss exactly what was going to happen next as far as my care was concerned.\u00a0 I had to tell myself not to worry about any of it.\u00a0 I was in good hands, and Pa wasn\u2019t going to let me hurt if he could do anything about it.\u00a0 The laudanum hadn\u2019t taken much of the pain away, but it had eased up just a tad and that was better than I\u2019d felt for almost a week.\u00a0 So, with the realization that I was back in my own bed and surrounded by people who loved me, I closed my eyes and tried to will myself to fall to sleep.\u00a0 All my other worries would just have to wait until later.\u00a0 I was home where I belonged and just the thought of that made me rest easier than I had for a long while.\u00a0 And besides, I now knew that I wouldn\u2019t need a hole drilled into my head nor was I going to die from my injury.\u00a0 After thinking about both for days I now had some hope.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Doc set his cup and saucer on top of the coffee table and stared at the four men gathered in the living room hanging onto his every word.\u00a0 Hop Sing had joined his American family to listen to what was going to be done for Little Joe.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s not something to take lightly as I\u2019ve told all of you.\u00a0 A skull fracture is a terrible injury, and it causes a great deal of pain.\u00a0 The laudanum will help but it won\u2019t take care of it all.\u00a0 I need each one of you to remember to lower your voice and let the ranch hands know about it too.\u00a0 No closing doors loudly and do whatever you can to lessen the noise inside this house.\u00a0 It doesn\u2019t take much to make it worse on someone who\u2019s got this type of injury.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat about the light situation, Doc?\u00a0 Joe told Pa that he\u2019s got a problem with it,\u201d Adam asked as he sat down on the settee next to Hoss.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, bright light can affect someone in this condition but that\u2019s not as hard to control as the noise situation is.\u00a0 Ben, you pull those blinds down before you go to bed tonight and draw Joe\u2019s curtains.\u00a0 Keep it like that until the boy has healed.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben nodded and then asked, \u201cYou said it\u2019s a slight fracture \u2013 is there any chance it could get worse?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAs long as you keep Joe in bed and let him get lots of rest he should heal.\u00a0 But I did notice bruising behind both of his ears.\u00a0 That\u2019s typical for someone who has that kind of a fracture, and it means that there\u2019s some bleeding going on.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIsn\u2019t that dangerous?\u201d Hoss was quick to ask as he cast a look over at the doctor.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNot necessarily.\u00a0 He\u2019s not bleeding from his nose or his ears\u2013 and hasn\u2019t been, right, Ben?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo \u2013 he didn\u2019t mention it and I never saw any blood.\u00a0 Hoss and I\u2019ve been with Joe all day.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Doc nodded and said, \u201cDon\u2019t be upset if it happens.\u00a0 Sometimes blood or clear liquid comes out through the nose in these cases.\u00a0 Just let me know if you see it happen.\u00a0 Now \u2013 let\u2019s talk about what we can do for him.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The four men all stared back and forth and then all eyes were trained on the doctor.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoe\u2019s probably not going to like this part,\u201d Paul began as Hop Sing poured him another cup of coffee.\u00a0 \u201cThank you,\u201d He nodded and took a few sips before continuing.\u00a0 \u201cHe\u2019s going to need a haircut.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHuh?\u201d Hoss questioned.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cA <strong><em>major haircut<\/em><\/strong>,\u201d Paul asserted and stared at Ben.\u00a0 \u201cWe\u2019re going to need to put ice on Little Joe\u2019s head several times a day.\u00a0 It\u2019ll help with that swelling that he kept talking about.\u00a0 You see in severe skull fractures surgery is needed due to excessive blood pooling underneath the skull.\u00a0 But I didn\u2019t feel a severe indention anywhere on the boy\u2019s head, so we won\u2019t have to go that route, thank God.\u00a0 It is a terrible surgery so I can understand Little Joe being so scared that he\u2019d have to have it.\u00a0 However, there is some bleeding underneath Joe\u2019s skull which was evident by that bruising behind his ears that I just mentioned.\u00a0 The only way to help with that and the swelling it\u2019s causing is to pack ice all around the head.\u00a0 I need him to get his hair cut just as short as you can manage, Hop Sing.\u00a0 That way we\u2019ll be icing his head and not just getting that boy\u2019s hair wet.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI don\u2019t want to be the one to tell Little Joe that he\u2019s getting his hair cut short,\u201d Adam sighed.\u00a0 Everyone in the family knew that the boy liked to wear his hair long to the chagrin of his father.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI don\u2019t think he\u2019ll mind,\u201d Ben asserted.\u00a0 \u201cThat boy is in a whole lot of pain and anything short of a hole drilled through his skull will most likely be welcomed at this point.\u00a0 How short, Paul?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Paul held up his fingers and indicated a half inch in length.\u00a0 \u201cHop Sing, we need to get on this as soon as possible.\u00a0 Would you get a bath ready for the boy and then afterwards while he\u2019s still in the tub you can get those shears of yours and have at him?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI heat water now, vely good,\u201d The man said and hurried into the kitchen.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI guess a bath wouldn\u2019t hurt.\u00a0 We\u2019ve got to get him into a nightshirt anyhow and I\u2019m sure Joe hasn\u2019t felt well enough to clean himself up since he left here,\u201d Ben nodded.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll go fetch the tub, Pa.\u00a0 I\u2019ll put it in the guest room right next to Joe\u2019s bedroom that way he won\u2019t have to walk as far as the bathhouse.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you, Son,\u201d Ben called to the big man as he left to tend to his chore.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa, I could head over to the blockhouse and get up some ice?\u00a0 It might take me a little while but I\u2019m sure I could have it here before it\u2019s too late.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThat would be fine, Adam.\u00a0 Get as much as you can for now and we\u2019ll pack it in some sawdust and see how long it\u2019ll keep in the root cellar.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBe back as quick as I can,\u201d Adam called as he jogged to the door and grabbed his holster and hat.\u00a0 He hurried out to get the buckboard.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLooks like everyone\u2019s busy but the two of us,\u201d Ben smiled and poured himself some coffee.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDon\u2019t worry, Ben.\u00a0 I\u2019m quite sure that you\u2019ll have more than your fair share of work to do once you go up there and tell your son that he\u2019s getting an unplanned haircut.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben shared a knowing smile with the doctor and, after a day filled with so much dread and turmoil, it felt good to do so.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>\u201cJoseph,\u201d Ben whispered as he sat down on the bed next to his son and placed a hand onto the boy\u2019s left cheek.\u00a0 \u201cJoseph, can you open your eyes?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Slowly Little Joe responded by rolling his head from side to side.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThat\u2019s it, Son \u2013 come on open those eyes for me,\u201d he crooned as he lightly patted his son\u2019s face to bring him around.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPa?\u00a0 Pa \u2013 what\u2019s going on?\u201d He asked just as disoriented as he had been earlier in the evening.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHere, drink some of this.\u00a0 Hop Sing made you some tea to settle your stomach.\u00a0 I know you\u2019ve not eaten much in the last few days,\u201d He held the cup up to his son\u2019s lips and waited until Joe was aware enough to take a sip.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNot too thirsty,\u201d Little Joe said after only taking a couple of short sips.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDoc said that would probably happen because of your injury.\u00a0 But we\u2019ve got to keep you drinking and you\u2019re going to have to try to eat something to get your strength up too.\u00a0 I won\u2019t force that on you right now though.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Glancing around the dim room, Joe asked, \u201cDid Doc leave?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes \u2013 but he\u2019s going to be back tomorrow to see you.\u00a0 Right now, we need to get you into a bath and then into a nightshirt, Young Man.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIsn\u2019t it kind of late to take a bath, Pa?\u00a0 Besides my head\u2019s killing me now that I\u2019m awake,\u201d He complained.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou\u2019re due for some more pain medicine but I can\u2019t give you any until after your bath.\u00a0 I don\u2019t want you falling on your way next door,\u201d Ben replied and pulled the covers off his son.\u00a0 \u201cGive me your arm, Joseph.\u00a0 I\u2019ll walk you into the next room.\u00a0 Hoss brought the tub in there so you wouldn\u2019t have to move around too much.\u00a0 Hop Sing\u2019s got the bathwater heated up and it\u2019s all ready for you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Groaning, Little Joe slowly slid his legs over the side of the bed.\u00a0 From the moment he had awakened the pressure in his head had mounted. \u201cDo we really have to do this, Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m sorry but we do,\u201d Ben returned and grabbed his son\u2019s elbow pulling him up.<\/p>\n<p>Together they walked into the guest room just next door.\u00a0 Hop Sing was waiting inside to help assist the boy.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI help you Little Joe,\u201d the cook insisted.\u00a0 \u201cYou sit on bench for Hop Sing.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe nodded and took a seat next to the tub.\u00a0 He unbuttoned his shirt and removed it.\u00a0 \u201cI can take a bath all by myself thanks,\u201d he called up to both men.<\/p>\n<p>Ben smiled to see that skull fractured or not his youngest was going to be independent as much as he could.\u00a0 \u201cAlright, Joseph.\u00a0 But we\u2019ll both be just outside.\u00a0 You sing out if you have any trouble.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay \u2013 but I\u2019m not gonna be in that tub long.\u00a0 Head hurts too much.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI understand, Joseph\u2014now be careful stepping into that tub, you hear?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, Sir,\u201d Joe mumbled as he watched the two men move out into the hall.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>I wasn\u2019t exactly sure just what was going on at the time.\u00a0 I knew that it had to be close to midnight by the time I\u2019d slowly dropped underneath that hot water and reached for the bar of soap.\u00a0 Of course, I imagined that I probably didn\u2019t smell all that great due to the fact that I hadn\u2019t had a bath in more than a week.\u00a0 But I couldn\u2019t understand why it had been so all-fired important that Pa had made me take one that night.\u00a0 I soaped up good since I was starting to get the impression that I\u2019d be spending a long while in my bed after hearing what Doc had said about my injury.\u00a0 I guessed that I wouldn\u2019t be going anywhere any time soon since I supposed that a skull would take longer to heal than a broken arm would have.\u00a0 I was just about to call out to my father that I was ready to have a towel handed to me when both Pa and Hop Sing reappeared in the room.\u00a0 And they hadn\u2019t come alone.\u00a0 I spotted the shears along with the peculiar look on my father\u2019s face.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>\u201cWhat are those for?\u201d Little Joe whispered as both Pa and Hop Sing approached the tub.<\/p>\n<p>Exchanging uneasy glances back and forth with Hop Sing, Ben finally answered.\u00a0 \u201cJoseph, Doc said we\u2019ve got to cut your hair.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHuh?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou\u2019re going to need that head of yours iced down regularly to help with the swelling.\u00a0 Doc said your hair will need to be clipped very short so the ice can penetrate better.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe closed his eyes as he now understood the need for the late-night bath.\u00a0 His head was throbbing and he was beginning to feel faint.\u00a0 \u201cGo ahead, cut it as short as you want to, Hop Sing.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Hop Sing stared over at his boss and shrugged his shoulders.\u00a0 He never expected that kind of a response from the very particular boy he had helped to raise.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou not care?\u201d Hop Sing asked the boy in the tub.<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe shook his head and closed his eyes.\u00a0 \u201cNo \u2013 just do it will you?\u00a0 I just want to get out of here and into my bed.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben was finally cognizant of the fact that his youngest was hurting beyond words to have so easily agreed to the idea of a haircut.\u00a0 Especially a very short one.\u00a0 He would have been happier to have dealt with the boy\u2019s anger over the idea because at least that would mean that Little Joe was feeling a little more like himself.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGo ahead, Hop Sing,\u201d Ben whispered to the cook and watched as he spread a towel onto the floor behind where his son was seated in the tub.\u00a0 The room was silent as strand by strand the curls were cut off and soon Little Joe\u2019s hair wasn\u2019t much longer than a half of an inch all around his head.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThat okay?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, Hop Sing, thank you,\u201d Ben nodded appreciatively.<\/p>\n<p>Hop Sing handed a towel to Little Joe and he wrapped it around his waist. Usually, he needed an extra towel to dry his curls but there weren\u2019t any. Both Ben and Hop Sing were surprised when the boy didn\u2019t say anything about it, even though they had both witnessed him touching the top of his head.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSomeone want to get me my robe?\u201d Joe asked looking around the room.<\/p>\n<p>Ben shot an awkward glance over to Hop Sing and noticed the knowing gleam on his face.\u00a0 The man was grinning over what the worried father had done concerning his son\u2019s robe.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJust a minute \u2013 be right back,\u201d Ben called over to his son and ducked out into the hall and then hurried into his bedroom.\u00a0 He had forgotten that he had held onto his son\u2019s robe, worried that he\u2019d never see him again.\u00a0 Ben jogged back across the hall and handed it to Little Joe who gave him a questioning look.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cFather keep for you,\u201d Hop Sing smiled as he stared at Ben who dropped his head down some.<\/p>\n<p>Clearing his throat, Ben announced, \u201cLet\u2019s get this boy back into his room.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Hop Sing smiled up at his boss and said, \u201cAlight, I help.\u00a0 Then \u2013 can please have Little Joe robe to wash for tomorrow?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben grinned sheepishly.\u00a0 He patted the cook\u2019s shoulder and nodded.\u00a0 Yes \u2013 as soon as this young man is in bed you can have his robe.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cVely good,\u201d Hop Sing returned and walked alongside Little Joe in case he needed assistance.<\/p>\n<p>Upon drying off and making his way back to his bedroom, Little Joe was soon dressed in a nightshirt and slid underneath the sheet and blanket on his bed.\u00a0 He eased back against his pillows and stared over at his father who had been very quiet ever since they had walked inside the room.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI know, Pa,\u201d Little Joe said with a tired sigh.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat?\u201d he asked staring at the boy.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou expected me to make a big fuss about the haircut.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben grinned and nodded.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019ve been worried about how you were going to react ever since Doc told me what we had to do.\u00a0 As much as I don\u2019t like to see you upset \u2013 well \u2013 if you had fussed some then at least I\u2019d know you were feeling a little bit better.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWish I could fuss then,&#8221; Little Joe answered and winced his face.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m getting you some right now Joseph,\u201d Ben knew that the boy was hurting and hurried to pour the laudanum onto the tablespoon.\u00a0 Joe accepted it gratefully and then eased down in the bed.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cCan I sleep a little while before you have to put the ice on me, Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSure,\u201d Ben nodded and sat down on the bed next to his son.\u00a0 His face took on a worried countenance again.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat is it, Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLet me have a look at you for a minute,\u201d he answered.\u00a0 Ben anxiously held his breath as he gently rolled the boy\u2019s head to one side.\u00a0 There behind Joe\u2019s left ear was a huge purplish bruise.\u00a0 He examined his son\u2019s other ear and found the same discoloration behind it.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou might just as well tell me, Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou\u2019ve just got some bruising behind your ears.\u00a0 Paul mentioned something about that to me but with your hair being in the way I couldn\u2019t see it.\u00a0 It\u2019s okay \u2013 he said it wasn\u2019t anything to worry about.\u00a0 But it is a sign that we\u2019ve got to get that ice on your head, Young Man.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe nodded.\u00a0 He read the appearance of fear on his father\u2019s face and didn\u2019t want to make him worry more than was necessary.\u00a0 \u201cPa \u2013 you can bring the ice up whenever you want.\u00a0 Maybe it\u2019ll help with some of the pain.\u00a0 That medicine is probably going to knock me out \u2013 so I probably won\u2019t feel the ice anyhow.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Examining his son\u2019s face, Ben knew why he had made the concession.\u00a0 He realized that Joe was trying to ease his mind after having witnessed the awful looking bruising.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you, Joseph,\u201d He whispered and leaned down.\u00a0 He placed a kiss on his son\u2019s forehead and stood from the bed.\u00a0 He headed for the door.\u00a0 There was an urgent matter of ice that needed to be fetched up to the room.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>That night I watched as Pa carefully wrapped the towel filled with chipped ice around my head from back to front.\u00a0 He advised me that Doc wanted me to keep it on for at least fifteen minutes at a time.\u00a0 At first, it made me feel worse and I\u2019d almost pulled the darned thing off me.\u00a0 \u00a0But Pa was sitting there on the bed right next to me offering moral support and the comfort of his hand on my arm so I couldn\u2019t bring myself to do it.\u00a0 He just looked so worried, and I knew that if I protested it would make matters worse on him, so I toughed it out.\u00a0 After about ten minutes I guess the ice sort of numbed the area and I didn\u2019t mind that.\u00a0 When I told Pa that it was doing better, he broke into the first genuine smile that I\u2019d seen on him all day.\u00a0 Of course, it helped that he was giving me the laudanum too and between the two I began to feel like I might actually live.\u00a0 When Pa finally removed that towel and placed it inside the bowl that Hop Sing had left for him, he looked relieved to have the first treatment behind us.\u00a0 He even joked about not having to fuss at me to get a haircut for a good six months since there wasn\u2019t much hair left on my head.\u00a0 Knowing that he had to be totally exhausted, I told him that I\u2019d be fine and that he should go to his room and get some sleep.\u00a0 Pa was Pa and he wasn\u2019t going to hear of it.\u00a0 He said he\u2019d just doze off in the chair by my bed like he was so used to doing after so many years of my getting hurt.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t need that reminder, especially now.\u00a0 He pulled the blankets up around my shoulders and stoked the fireplace in my room even though it wasn\u2019t all that cold.\u00a0 I guess he was worried that on top of everything else that I\u2019d catch a cold due to the ice he had placed on top of my almost hairless head.\u00a0 Before I closed my eyes for the last time that first night, I witnessed Pa standing over my bed and just staring down at me.\u00a0 He looked as though he was fighting back his tears.\u00a0 I knew he was worried about me especially since just the two words <strong><em>skull fracture<\/em><\/strong> had a very scary sound to them.\u00a0 But I think it was more than that.\u00a0 Pa was probably thinking the same thing as I was.\u00a0 The night I had left for the cabin I had no intention of ever coming back home and I think he knew that all along.\u00a0 Later, after I realized that I was severely injured, I hadn\u2019t wanted to come home only to end up dying and causing my father even more pain.\u00a0 Pa had been thinking about how I might have died if they hadn\u2019t found me that day.\u00a0 I could read it in his facial expression and in the unspent tears in his eyes.\u00a0 I should have known that my father wasn\u2019t going to let me go that easily no matter how much grief I\u2019ve caused him over the years.\u00a0 When all is said and done, I guess it all comes down to the fact that he loves me unconditionally and that feeling is mutual.\u00a0 Before he settled down into the chair where he would once again begin his sentry duty for the night, he simply leaned down and kissed my forehead.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t need to say it, I knew.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI love you too, Pa,\u201d I whispered and smiled up at him.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>The first few nights had been the toughest for the family as they had to get used to the idea that Little Joe was in rough shape.\u00a0 No-one wanted to wrap the kid\u2019s head in ice as they knew that it would be both uncomfortable and painful for Joe to have to endure.\u00a0 But they knew that it had to be done.\u00a0 Joe wasn\u2019t thrilled with the prospect, but he had done his best not to complain about the procedure.\u00a0 All his family members along with Hop Sing took turns sitting there at Joe\u2019s bedside around the clock each day and night.\u00a0 They waited and they worried about his condition.\u00a0 Most of all they prayed.\u00a0 By the end of the first week there hadn\u2019t been very much improvement, but Doctor Martin had told them to expect that to be the case because as he had warned them \u201cskull fractures don\u2019t heal overnight\u201d.\u00a0 \u00a0He had come out every day for the first week to make sure that the boy was doing okay and then his visits were every other day thereafter.\u00a0 With each visit he assured the patient and his family that the pain would eventually lessen as the fracture healed.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>\u201cCome closer\u201d Little Joe whispered to Hoss who was standing on the right side of his bed with Adam there on the left.<\/p>\n<p>Hoss neared his little brother and bent down so he could hear him a bit better.\u00a0 \u201cWhat is it, Short Shanks?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAdam\u2019s about ready to take this ice pack off my head and then I want the two of you to go out somewhere and just get away from all of this for a while,\u201d Joe insisted and closed his eyes trying not to show the pain he was dealing with.<\/p>\n<p>Adam leaned down next to both brothers and gently pulled back the towel with the now-melted ice.\u00a0 \u201cJust lift your head a tad, Joe,\u201d He instructed and watched Joe making the effort though he could tell the boy was physically spent.\u00a0 Adam rolled the towel up in his hands and placed it in the bowl on the nightstand.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoe, you\u2019re not going to get rid of us,\u201d Adam smiled.\u00a0 \u201cYou are a captive audience and I\u2019m just about to break into the classic \u201cAll the world\u2019s a stage\u201d just for your entertainment.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDon\u2019t you think that I\u2019m sick enough?\u201d Little Joe protested and then turned his attention back to Hoss.\u00a0 \u201cC\u2019mon will you two scram for a bit?\u00a0 And how about taking Pa with you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI heard that,\u201d came a voice from the doorway.\u00a0 Ben walked into the room and joined his sons around Little Joe\u2019s bed.\u00a0 \u201cIs your little brother trying to get rid of the three of us again?\u201d Ben whispered with a grin on his face.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah, Pa \u2013 he thinks that we\u2019re all overdoing it,\u201d Hoss announced and moved from the bed giving his father some room to maneuver.<\/p>\n<p>Ben set the cup of tea on the nightstand and stared down at the boy.\u00a0 \u201cHop Sing sent you up some more tea, Joseph.\u00a0 He said he mixed some things together that are sure to help your pain.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNot again,\u201d Joe sighed and slowly shook his head.\u00a0 \u201cAll I\u2019ve had is tea.\u00a0 I haven\u2019t had coffee since that horrible tasting stuff I made in the cabin.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben tried not to laugh because he was trying to keep the noise down to a minimum.\u00a0 \u201cDoc said not to give you any coffee for a while, Joseph.\u00a0 And you\u2019d better drink this or you know what Hop Sing will do.\u00a0 You don\u2019t want him yelling at you in Chinese do you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay,\u201d Joe nodded and pulled himself up in the bed some.<\/p>\n<p>Hoss and Adam moved closer to their father and gave him the nod that all had gone well with Joe\u2019s treatment.\u00a0 Ben smiled and winked at them both.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNow what\u2019s this about trying to get rid of us, Joseph?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Sipping his tea and showing his displeasure with the taste, Little Joe replied, \u201cYou three have been in here too much.\u00a0 I mean other than icing my head and giving me medicine you don\u2019t need to stand guard over me.\u00a0 I\u2019m sure as heck not getting out of this bed until this darn headache goes away.\u00a0 Pa \u2013 you\u2019ve been in here almost every night.\u00a0 And the nights that you\u2019re not sleeping in that chair over there Hoss or Adam are filling in for you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI think you kept that ice on him too long, Adam.\u00a0 It must\u2019ve affected his brain,\u201d Hoss quipped.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI think you\u2019re right, next time we need to time it using Pa\u2019s watch,\u201d Adam grinned.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAlright, Boys,\u201d Ben began and shot a look at both Adam and Hoss.\u00a0 \u201cLet\u2019s let Joe get some rest.\u00a0 I\u2019m going to get some broth for him in a little while.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI think he wants the two of you to actually do some work instead of spending your day staring at me,\u201d Little Joe smiled.<\/p>\n<p>Hoss grinned over at Adam and said, \u201cThe kid doesn\u2019t know that Pa\u2019s given us a month off just to take care of him.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThat\u2019s right, Little Joe,\u201d Adam nodded.\u00a0 \u201cMaybe two months depending on how much ice we can find for you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben frowned and returned sternly.\u00a0 \u201cNo, I said two weeks.\u00a0 After then it\u2019s back to the old grind for both of you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay, Pa \u2013 but if you don\u2019t need us right now \u2013 we were thinking of going into town,\u201d Adam announced and shared a smile with Hoss.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah \u2013 that\u2019s right,\u201d Hoss agreed.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGo and have fun,\u201d Joe frowned.\u00a0 \u201cJust remember that I\u2019m laying in this bed suffering.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Adam patted his youngest brother\u2019s shoulder and returned, \u201cWe\u2019ll drink a few for you, Little Joe.\u00a0 And when we get home, we\u2019ll tell you how good they were, okay?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe just frowned as he watched his brothers walking out of his room.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNow that I got rid of them how about you go and relax for a while, Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDon\u2019t I look relaxed?\u201d Ben grinned as he settled down in the chair.\u00a0 \u201cI even brought the paper to read while you close your eyes.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay \u2013 I guess you can stay.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDid Adam give you your medicine?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah \u2013 I\u2019m done with the ice for a couple of hours and I\u2019ve had my medicine.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGood \u2013 then lay there and close your eyes and I\u2019ll get back to relaxing,\u201d Ben smiled and opened his newspaper.<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe obeyed and closed his eyes.\u00a0 \u201cI wish this head of mine would get better so I could go into town like my brothers.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo talking,\u201d Ben stated firmly.\u00a0 \u201cAnd you\u2019ll get better \u2013 just give it time, Joseph.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Nodding to his father, he whispered, \u201cYou\u2019re right, Pa.\u201d\u00a0 Then he fell asleep under the watchful eye of the man who had no intention of reading his newspaper.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Pa had thought that I was annoyed with my brothers but that wasn\u2019t the case.\u00a0 I was glad that most days they were upstairs with me for a good bit of the time.\u00a0 After spending so long up in that cabin, when I thought neither of them would ever talk to me again, it meant all that much more that they hadn\u2019t said one word about my hitting Pa.\u00a0 Nobody mentioned it to me, not my brothers and not my father.\u00a0 They acted like nothing had ever happened and I was more than grateful because I still thought about it all the time.\u00a0 I couldn\u2019t have asked for a better set of brothers, or a better friend than Hop Sing.\u00a0 And of course, I can\u2019t forget the sentry over in the chair by my bed.\u00a0 He\u2019s the greatest. \u00a0The fact of the matter was that everyone checked on me constantly.\u00a0 Even Hop Sing would quietly steal into my room even on those nights when Pa was sound asleep in the chair next to my bed.\u00a0 He\u2019d refill the water pitcher and make sure I didn\u2019t need anything.\u00a0 And most of the time I\u2019d see him and just nod over to him that I appreciated all that he was doing for me.\u00a0 I was still hurting something fierce, that hadn\u2019t changed.\u00a0 But I wasn\u2019t alone like I\u2019d been up in the cabin and that made all the difference in the world.\u00a0 And those days when I thought that I just couldn\u2019t handle the pain any longer everyone seemed to know and went out of their way to try and cheer me up.\u00a0 That\u2019s what a family is all about, I guess.\u00a0 They\u2019re there for the good days and they\u2019re there for the bad ones.\u00a0 I knew that if it had been any one of them in bed with a skull fracture or anything else that I\u2019d be doing the same thing.\u00a0 Pa had taught us to stick together and that was what we did.\u00a0 Sure, my brothers and I fought and we argued, but the bottom line was that we never stopped caring about each other.\u00a0 And as for the patriarch of the clan, well he was our role model and someone we aspired to grow up to be.\u00a0 Not that that would ever be attained \u2013 none of us thought that would happen.\u00a0 There was only one Ben Cartwright, and I knew how lucky I was to call him my father.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>\u201cFletcher?\u201d Ben said surprised by the man\u2019s visit.\u00a0 He hadn\u2019t seen hide nor hair of the man for an entire week and had started to wonder if the foreman had quit due to his run-in with Joe up at the cabin.\u00a0 \u201cCome on in,\u201d Ben held the door open for his old friend.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThanks, Ben,\u201d he nodded and stepped into the living room.\u00a0 \u201cI hope I didn\u2019t knock too loudly?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben smiled, now aware that the man knew all about Little Joe\u2019s condition.\u00a0 \u201cNo \u2013 I only heard you because I was heading to the kitchen to ask Hop Sing to heat Joe up some broth.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHow is the boy doing?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Sighing, Ben shook his head.\u00a0 \u201cHe\u2019s had a rough go of it, Fletcher.\u00a0 It\u2019s only been a week, but Doc told all of us to be patient.\u00a0 He\u2019s still hurting a great deal, but Paul said that Joseph\u2019s pain should begin to ease up soon.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher frowned and shook his head.\u00a0 \u201cBen \u2013 that day that Little Joe knocked me off of the porch there at the cabin &#8211;,\u201d he trailed off trying to get his thoughts in order.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWell \u2013 the fact of the matter it was my own fault that he done that.\u00a0 I should\u2019ve known better.\u00a0 I\u2019d gone to that trading post a few miles north of there and that\u2019s how I knew Joe couldn\u2019t have gone too far.\u00a0 But my friend there said that the boy was feeling poorly and had been complaining about having a headache.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGo on,\u201d Ben insisted when the man stopped talking.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI didn\u2019t pay it no mind \u2013 I was just so mad at the kid.\u00a0 But then when I found him up at that cabin \u2013 well I burst in on him yelling.\u00a0 Joe kept asking me to hold it down \u2013 and well \u2013 you know me \u2013 I just got louder.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben pursed his lips and nodded.\u00a0 He knew the foreman very well and could just imagine how he had treated his son.\u00a0 \u201cI see.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI thought the boy was just giving me lip \u2013 and I said some pretty rotten things to him.\u00a0 And before he shoved me out the door, I was downright shouting at the top of my lungs at him.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWell, I guess now you know that someone with a skull fracture like Joseph has would take that type of noise the same as he would with the sound of a cannon going off inside his head, right?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher nodded and looked down at the floor feeling awful for the things he had both said and done to the kid.\u00a0 \u201cYeah, and I\u2019ve been kicking myself over it ever since Hoss and Adam told me about Little Joe\u2019s injury.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben reached over and offered a commiserative pat to the man\u2019s shoulder.\u00a0 \u201cDon\u2019t worry about it \u2013 I\u2019m sure Joe isn\u2019t holding a grudge over it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJust the same I\u2019d like to see the boy, Ben.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Wincing his face at the very thought of the loud boisterous man being allowed inside his son\u2019s sick room, Ben shook his head.\u00a0 \u201cThat\u2019s probably not such a good idea right now, Fletcher.\u00a0 Joseph has to have complete quiet right now \u2013 doctor\u2019s orders.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBen Cartwright,\u201d the man began angrily.\u00a0 \u201cDo you reckon I don\u2019t know that?\u00a0 I\u2019m not so mean spirited that I\u2019d want to go and hurt that boy!\u00a0 I just want to see him.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cCalm down,\u201d Ben insisted.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll calm down when you let me see your boy.\u00a0 Until then I\u2019m gonna stand right here and fuss until either you let me see Little Joe or you throw me off your porch like he done.\u201d<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>*** Oh Lord, I just bet he would make me do that too. <strong><em><\/em><\/strong> Ben thought to himself.\u00a0 <strong><em><\/em><\/strong> Joseph, you must have had the patience of Job that night not throwing him off that porch the minute that he started yelling at you, because I don\u2019t have a skull fracture and I\u2019m about ready to do that very thing right now! ***<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>\u201cIf you\u2019ll keep your voice down to a whisper and not stay too long, I\u2019ll take you up to see him, Fletcher.\u00a0 But if you do anything to hurt that boy, I promise you that I\u2019ll forget all about throwing you out of this door and toss you out Joseph\u2019s bedroom window instead.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher grinned over at Ben and nodded, \u201cSounds fair.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cCome on ahead,\u201d Ben sighed and the two of them walked up the stairs.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>\u201cJoseph?\u201d Ben whispered as he walked quietly inside the bedroom.\u00a0 \u201cYou\u2019ve got some company.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Joe looked across the room and witnessed both his father and Fletcher walking over to his bed.\u00a0 He had expected Pa, but he was flabbergasted to see the foreman.\u00a0 The last time he had seen Fletcher, the man was looking up from the ground where he had landed after being thrown out of the cabin\u2019s door.\u00a0 And the man had been so angry with him that he was spitting nails.\u00a0 Little Joe wondered why in the world his father would have let the foreman inside his room.\u00a0 Surely Pa would\u2019ve known better than to let that loud cantankerous man in to see him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJust came to see you, Little Joe,\u201d Fletcher whispered as he moved closer to the bed.\u00a0 He turned and looked at Ben.\u00a0 \u201cWe don\u2019t need you in here, Ben.\u00a0 Go get that broth for this kid \u2013 we\u2019ll be just fine.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe stared at his father and his eyes grew wider.\u00a0 He hoped that Pa could read the concern all over his face at the time and wouldn\u2019t leave the room.<\/p>\n<p>Hesitating at first, Ben finally agreed and walked quietly out of the room praying the whole while that he had made the right judgement call.\u00a0 He hoped that Fletcher knew he meant business because if the man caused any harm to his youngest Ben would follow through with his threat to toss the man out through the boy\u2019s window.\u00a0 Ben wanted to wait outside the bedroom door and listen in to the conversation, but he did want to tell Hop Sing to heat the broth for Joe, so he hurried down to the kitchen.\u00a0 He promised himself that he\u2019d be right back just in case his son needed assistance.<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher sat down in the chair next to Little Joe\u2019s bed and stared over at him.\u00a0 His words were stuck in his throat for a few minutes, but he finally choked them out.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLittle Joe, listen \u2013 first of all I want to tell you how sorry I am that you\u2019re hurting as bad as you are.\u00a0 I\u2019ve heard all about skull fractures and they\u2019re a tough thing for anyone to go through.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThanks,\u201d Joe whispered, still wary about what the foreman was ultimately going to say to him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNow listen \u2013 I said some things that night up at the cabin that I shouldn\u2019t ought to have said to you.\u00a0 I believe that when a man\u2019s done wrong, he ought to own up to it \u2013 so that\u2019s why I\u2019m here.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s okay.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher shook his head and returned, \u201cNo \u2013 Little Joe \u2013 it ain\u2019t okay.\u00a0 I\u2019m always the first to yell at you about acting right \u2013 and I didn\u2019t that night.\u00a0 You asked me to hold it down a bunch of times, but I just thought that you were giving me lip.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t know that you\u2019d gotten yourself hurt.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cFletcher, I said it\u2019s okay,\u201d Joe repeated trying to let the man off of the hook.<\/p>\n<p>Frowning and trying his best not to raise his voice he bit his lip to hold it in before continuing.\u00a0 \u201cNow would you please just shut your mouth so I can finish?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe simply nodded that time.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThanks,\u201d The man smiled.\u00a0 \u201cI said some mean things \u2013 like calling you a lily-livered coward.\u00a0 That wasn\u2019t called for and I want you to forget that I said it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou weren\u2019t totally wrong, Fletcher \u2013 I did run off when I should\u2019ve stayed and owned up to what I\u2019d done,\u201d Joe asserted.<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher shook his head and reached over to Joe\u2019s arm, dropping his hand onto it.\u00a0 \u201cLittle Joe \u2013 from what your brothers said you didn\u2019t know what you were doing the night you hit your pa.\u00a0 You don\u2019t own that one.\u00a0 I\u2019m sure once you found out what happened you left \u2013 not because you were a coward \u2013 but you didn\u2019t want to hurt nobody.\u00a0 Now ain\u2019t that the way of it?\u201d He asked softly.<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe nodded and had to fight back his tears.\u00a0 It was one thing to have received forgiveness and understanding from his pa but to hear Fletcher say it had touched him deeply.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNow \u2013 you just put all that in the past, you hear?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll try.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAnd you forget all of what happened between the two of us too, okay?\u201d He asked, pulling himself up from the chair in preparation to leave the room.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThanks, Fletcher&#8211; -it means a lot to me that you came here today.\u00a0 I\u2019ve had a rough time \u2013 and I wasn\u2019t feeling too good about what I\u2019d done to my father \u2013 and you either.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI understand,\u201d He nodded.\u00a0 \u201cWell \u2013 I best be going.\u00a0 Now you take care of yourself, you hear?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe nodded as the man walked to his bedroom door.<\/p>\n<p>Fletcher cast a quick glance at the boy in the bed.\u00a0 Little Joe looked so pale and sickly that it gave him pause.\u00a0 He quietly opened the bedroom door and carefully closed it as he stepped into the hallway.<\/p>\n<p>Ben had come up the backstairs from the kitchen and peered down the hallway in time to see Fletcher leaving his son\u2019s room.\u00a0 He was surprised when he spotted the man wiping his eyes on his shirtsleeve before turning for the other staircase.\u00a0 Smiling to himself Ben knew that the grizzled cantankerous foreman had a soft heart underneath his carefully crafted fa\u00e7ade.\u00a0 It was very apparent to him that Fletcher had felt bad about having fussed at Little Joe and now, after seeing how sickly the boy was, he had shed some tears over the whole event.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>*** Your secret is safe with me, Fletcher. ***<\/em><\/strong> Ben grinned as he proceeded down to his son\u2019s bedroom.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Epilogue<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe hung onto the side of the breaking corral with his feet placed up onto the second rail.\u00a0 He watched as one of the top wranglers mounted one of the new horses that Hoss had rounded up a few days ago.\u00a0 The boy smiled with delight waiting for the action to start and hoping that the man would stay atop the bucking bronc.\u00a0 It was then that he felt the tug to the bottom of his right pant leg.\u00a0 Looking behind him he saw an angry-looking father staring up at him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGet down from there, Young Man,\u201d Ben insisted sternly.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOh \u2013 Pa \u2013 I thought that you were in town with Hoss?\u201d Little Joe returned, wincing his face now that it appeared that he had been caught doing something he\u2019d been told not to do.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDown here,\u201d Ben pointed to the ground.<\/p>\n<p>Begrudgingly, Little Joe dropped down from the railing and stared up at his father.\u00a0 \u201cI was just looking, Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben nodded his head and placed a hand onto his son\u2019s shoulder giving it a slight squeeze.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m sure you were.\u00a0 But I told you that you\u2019re not to be anywhere around the breaking corral &#8211;,\u201d he was cut off in midsentence.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI know \u2013 I know,\u201d Little Joe frowned<strong><em>.\u00a0 \u201cIt\u2019s a temptation for you, Joseph \u2013 you\u2019ll get hurt, Joseph \u2013 I can\u2019t trust you, Joseph,\u201d<\/em><\/strong> he mimicked the things that his father had said for the last three months, ever since his skull fracture had finally healed.<\/p>\n<p>Ben cleared his throat loudly to get the boy\u2019s attention.\u00a0 \u201cWell, since you\u2019ve obviously heard me in order for you to recite my words so succinctly then you know what you\u2019re <strong>NOT<\/strong> supposed to be doing, right?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, Sir.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDoc said for you to stay away from the breaking corral and temptation for another three months.\u00a0 And I\u2019ve told you that almost every day as well, Young Man.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, Sir,\u201d Joe repeated with an aggravated sigh thrown in.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJoseph \u2013 you do remember how bad that head of yours felt \u2013 or do I have to remind you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo, Sir \u2013 I remember,\u201d Joe nodded and smiled wryly over at his father.\u00a0 \u201cI was only looking at the new horses, honest, Pa.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben groaned and shook his head, \u201cDon\u2019t <strong><em>\u201chonest Pa\u201d<\/em><\/strong> me.\u00a0 I know you too well.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSorry,\u201d Little Joe apologized.\u00a0 He hadn\u2019t wanted to make his father upset.<\/p>\n<p>Ben couldn\u2019t stay angry with the boy who he had come so very close to losing due to the head injury; however, he wasn\u2019t about to take any chances with it happening again.\u00a0 He slung an arm around his son\u2019s shoulder and turned him toward the buckboard.\u00a0 \u201cYou come along into town with me, Joseph.\u00a0 I\u2019ve got plans for you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cPlans?\u201d Joe asked as he walked with his father to the wagon.<\/p>\n<p>Ben grinned and waited for his son to climb up next to him.\u00a0 The boy finally sat down and turned to stare at him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat kinds of plans, Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWell, it\u2019s been three months since Doc said that you were well enough to get out of bed, right?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah \u2013 so?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAnd you spent almost two and a half months in the house recovering, right?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe couldn\u2019t figure out what his father was getting at.\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cSo?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ben chuckled as he ruffled a hand over his son\u2019s head, which was now full of curls.\u00a0 \u201cSo \u2013 it\u2019s time for your first haircut.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe groaned.\u00a0 He should have guessed that his father would have been waiting for the chance to usher him back to the barber shop.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s not really <strong><em>that<\/em><\/strong> long yet, Pa,\u201d He complained hoping to get his way and their trip would be postponed for a couple of weeks.<\/p>\n<p>Ben reached over and tugged the hair that dipped down past the collar of the boy\u2019s jacket.\u00a0 \u201cYou have more hair than your two brothers and me combined!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBut it was short for so long, Pa \u2013 I was just getting used to having it back,\u201d Little Joe grinned.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll give you a choice then.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOh yeah? What choice?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou can have it done at the barbershop in town or I can get Hop Sing and his shears since he did such a great job the last time.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Little Joe frowned and shook his head.\u00a0 \u201cLet\u2019s go, Pa,\u201d he conceded.<\/p>\n<p>Ben laughed and sent the team forward.<\/p>\n<p>So, there I was a captive audience listening to my father\u2019s laughter and held against my will as we made our way into Virginia City.\u00a0 And though I wouldn\u2019t have told the man sitting next to me, I really didn\u2019t mind going to get a haircut.\u00a0 I was just happy that the sound of the team of horses wouldn\u2019t send hot streams of pain throughout my head like they had done on the trip back from the cabin months ago.\u00a0 \u00a0I\u2019ve learned a lot of things since almost getting myself killed out at the breaking corral.\u00a0 I learned that you should always tell someone if you get hurt because doing otherwise is a stupid move.\u00a0 And what I had done was a very stupid thing to do and it almost cost me my life.\u00a0 I learned that if you\u2019ve done something wrong \u2013 whether intentional or not \u2013 that you should stay and deal with the repercussions of your actions.\u00a0 Running away doesn\u2019t make the pain go away, it only hurts more people in the long run. \u00a0I learned that if you have a great family they will stick with you, even in the worst situations.\u00a0 My head injury was the worst situation I\u2019d ever dealt with, and I attribute the love of every member of my family, including Hop Sing, to being responsible for my still being alive.\u00a0 Foremost I learned that the man who now sat next to me smiling over the fact that I was being forced to get a haircut is the greatest father I could have ever asked for.\u00a0 I\u2019ll never forget that day when he walked inside the cabin.\u00a0 I had about given up on everything and had pretty much decided that I was going to die.\u00a0 I never believed that I\u2019d see him again and had pretty much figured that he wouldn\u2019t want to see me anyway after what I had done.\u00a0 But Pa had found me anyway, even though he had no clue as to why I had thrown that punch no more than I did at the time.\u00a0 But he wanted me back no matter the reason and took the time to find out what had happened to make me do that dreadful thing.\u00a0 Once he had learned that I had no recollection of hitting him and that I was suffering from a head injury he devoted his whole life to getting me well again.\u00a0 Night after night he cared for me, placing ice packs on my head even though I knew that it hurt him to do so.\u00a0 And most of those same nights he sat in the chair next to my bed just in case I needed him. And then day after day he tended to my needs while encouraging me and insisting that I\u2019d soon be back to my former self.\u00a0 And to prove that he was right he was now taking me off to get that haircut.\u00a0 I watched the happiness displayed on his face and I knew that a small part of it was because he was amused at me for complaining about having to get the haircut.\u00a0 But the larger part of it was because he was just happy that once again, I was healthy.\u00a0 And as for me, well, I was just happy to be with him.<\/p>\n<p>As we passed that small stream where I had turned Cochise and had headed to the cabin that night, I couldn\u2019t help thinking about my wanting to get far away from my father so he wouldn\u2019t find me.\u00a0 But now I know the truth.\u00a0 He would always find me.\u00a0 <strong><em>Because there\u2019s no place that far.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>The End<\/p>\n<p>Written by Wrangler<\/p>\n<p>7\/15\/26<\/p>\n<p>(Dedicated to the story consultant Rob.\u00a0 I\u2019m not lucky to have you, I am blessed. And to my friends who constantly give of themselves to root me on and keep me grounded, they\u2019re the reason I continue writing.)<\/p>\n<p>***Note from writer.\u00a0 My mother had a fractured skull when I was very young.\u00a0\u00a0 She suffered terribly and it wiped out the memory of her six children for a long while.\u00a0 But she was cured and fortunately didn\u2019t need surgery.\u00a0 She remains one of my all-time heroines for her bravery and courage.\u00a0 I hope this story would have made her proud because it was meant for her. ***<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Summary: Little Joe hides the fact that he hurt his head in a fall, leaving everyone wondering why his behavior has changed.\u00a0 Upset by his actions, Joe leaves home forcing his family to find him before time runs out. Rating T, WC 34,347<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":140,"featured_media":62206,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"template-full-width-post.php","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_members_access_role":[],"_members_access_error":""},"categories":[1015,23,1008,41],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-65505","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-joe-pa","category-drama","category-family","category-hurtcomfort","wpcat-1015-id","wpcat-23-id","wpcat-1008-id","wpcat-41-id"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/Screenshot_20260209_014807_YouTube.jpg?fit=1399%2C1080&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/65505","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/140"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=65505"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/65505\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":69550,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/65505\/revisions\/69550"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/62206"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=65505"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=65505"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=65505"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}