Summary: Joe is coming of age and is becoming quite the ladies man. This is just a short story of how Adam and Hoss tamed the wild beast within, but knowing Joe, it certainly won\u2019t be for long.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s a short story, but comes from the heart. It was written when I lost my sister to cancer and needed a good laugh.<\/p>\n
Rating: K+ \u00a01700<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
All But One Sense<\/strong><\/p>\n Adam Cartwright stood outside the entrance to the barn as music played loudly behind him. Couples were dancing and celebrating the coming of spring, but Adam\u2019s mind seemed preoccupied on something else; or rather someone else…his younger brother, Joe.<\/p>\n Adam and Hoss had received warning from their father to keep a close eye on him. The youngest Cartwright, now barely 17 years old, had a way of finding trouble. Not trouble with the law mind you, but trouble in just about every other sense.<\/p>\n In the past year, Joe had developed a keen eye for romance and started charming the ladies. At first, Adam and Hoss found it amusing. Joe would saunter up to a young lady and tip his hat and flash a magnetic smile.<\/p>\n \u201cExcuse me, but don\u2019t you know me from somewhere?\u201d He would politely ask.<\/p>\n The woman would then naturally respond, \u201cNo, I don\u2019t think so young man.\u201d<\/p>\n Joe would counteract. \u201cOh, that\u2019s right. I\u2019ve met you only in my dreams.\u201d<\/p>\n This would bring a slight reddening to the fair lady\u2019s cheeks and produce a nervous giggle.<\/p>\n \u201cMy name is Joe Cartwright, and you are?\u201d<\/p>\n The name would be given and then Joe would bring himself nearer, usually leaning against the building or post. He\u2019d eye her up and down and then look deep into her eyes.<\/p>\n \u201cWhy don\u2019t we go inside and have some lunch together.\u201d<\/p>\n Usually somewhere around here is where the woman\u2019s attached would intervene.<\/p>\n \u201cWhy don\u2019t you mind your own business, kid?\u201d<\/p>\n Instead of politely tipping his hat and walking away, Joe\u2019s mouth would spout off something witty and a fight would be eminent.<\/p>\n Hoss and Adam at first would jump right in and drag Joe away unscathed. As this routine became more prevalent, however, they would watch for a little a while, allowing their brother to absorb a few punches, before stepping in to save his hide.<\/p>\n The next day, they\u2019d find him back at it again, charming a new woman that happened to pass his direction. How bad was Joe\u2019s escapades with the ladies? Well, in the past few months he had courted fifteen; eight of which were ended by fights that one could safely say that Joe lost. Fights that Joe felt he would have won if his brothers would have stayed out of the picture and left him alone.<\/p>\n It had grown customary for everyone to see Joe sporting a black eye. It was almost as common as seeing him wearing his green jacket and hat. Their father was aggravated and annoyed by his son\u2019s constant love affairs. He bogged Joe down with jobs around the ranch, but Joe found a way to get all them done and still have time for romance.<\/p>\n After much pleading, and a week of good behavior, Ben allowed Joe to go to the dance under one stipulation: he must promise to stay within sight of his brothers. Well, Joe kept this promise for barely five minutes before ditching the two of them rather easily.<\/p>\n He gathered a group of his friends together, who then in turn, persuaded a group of young ladies to accompany them to a nearby grassy opening. It was Hoss who first discovered them there, sitting in a circle. A young boy and girl stood in the middle of this circle. The boy was blindfolded. Hoss remained hidden.<\/p>\n \u201cOkay everyone, we\u2019re ready,\u201d Joe spoke out. \u201cNow say in unison…\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cThere\u2019s someone in the circle standing a few feet away, Use all but one of your senses to discover who your true love is today.\u201d The crowd did as they were instructed.<\/p>\n Then they fell silent as all eyes watched.<\/p>\n \u201cI choose to hear. May I hear your voice?\u201d the blindfolded boy spoke out.<\/p>\n The girl responded by saying, \u201chello,\u201d in the goofiest voice she could muster. This brought a round of laughter from the crowd.<\/p>\n \u201cI choose to smell. May I smell your perfume?\u201d<\/p>\n The girl stepped close and the boy inhaled deeply.<\/p>\n The crowd then chanted: \u201cYou must now use touch. Touch the lips of your true love and then tell us her name.\u201d<\/p>\n The boy and girl kissed and then the boy said,<\/p>\n \u201cMy true love is Harriet.\u201d<\/p>\n Everyone laughed and said, \u201cYou may use your sight to unveil your true love.\u201d<\/p>\n The boy took off his blindfold to discover it wasn\u2019t Harriet, but Rhonda his sister. Everyone laughed as the two sat down.<\/p>\n \u201cOkay, who\u2019s next?\u201d Joe was eager to keep this game going. Hoss had seen enough. He quickly came back to the barn and found Adam.<\/p>\n \u201cDid you find him?\u201d Adam questioned.<\/p>\n \u201cYep, they\u2019re over in the field playing a kissing game of sorts.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cA kissing game,\u201d Adam asked. \u201cWhat sort of game is it?\u201d Hoss explained what he had witnessed and it didn\u2019t take long for Adam to know exactly the game they were playing: \u201cAll But One Sense.\u201d<\/p>\n A wry smile came upon his face as his eyes danced to the music still playing behind him.<\/p>\n \u201cDo you want to have some fun, brother?\u201d<\/p>\n Hoss knew his brother had a plan and simply answered, \u201cSure. What do we gotta do?\u201d<\/p>\n It took Adam and Hoss about 5 minutes to gather what was needed. They quietly made their way back to the field. Joe and his friends were still playing the game. They had just finished another round. This game had one catch to it, if you guessed right; you got to stay in the circle until you guessed wrong.<\/p>\n \u201cHey, Joe, When are you going to let someone else have a turn?\u201d Joe\u2019s best friend Mitch asked.<\/p>\n Everyone else muttered in agreement. \u201cI can\u2019t help it if I have keen senses, boys, but I see your point. This will be my last time so watch closely fellers. Perhaps you may learn something from the master.\u201d<\/p>\n Mitch just rolled his eyes and then helped Joe with the blindfold. Adam and Hoss approached from behind holding their fingers to their lips to make sure no one let Joe know they were there.<\/p>\n Hoss had something slightly squirming under his arm and everyone had to muffle their laughter as they realized what he was carrying. They didn\u2019t want Joe to detect any foul play.<\/p>\n \u201cAre we ready?\u201d Mitch asked. Okay everyone together: \u201cThere\u2019s someone in the circle standing a few feet away, Use all but one of your senses to discover who your true love is today.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI choose to smell. May I smell your perfume?\u201d<\/p>\n Adam stepped close and allowed his brother to sniff his aftershave. Joe scrunched up his nose at first. \u201cIt smells familiar but I can\u2019t place who it belongs to just yet.\u201d<\/p>\n Muffled laughter could be heard from the crowd.<\/p>\n \u201cI choose to hear. May I hear your voice?\u201d<\/p>\n This time it was Hoss\u2019s turn. He raised his voice several octaves and yelled \u201cWoo-hoo, I\u2019m over here.\u201d<\/p>\n Everyone laughed out loud at hearing this big man speak in such a high pitch squall.<\/p>\n The crowd then chanted: \u201cYou must now use touch. Touch the lips of your true love and then tell us her name.\u201d<\/p>\n Joe leaned forward and puckered his lips. Hoss stepped up and held out the object he had tucked under his arm. Joe\u2019s lips fell upon it as he provided a deep and meaningful kiss.<\/p>\n \u201cMy true love is Rebecca.\u201d Joe stated.<\/p>\n Everyone burst out laughing. Those that were able to speak between wails of laughter said, \u201cYou may use your sight to unveil your true love.\u201d<\/p>\n Joe whipped off his blindfold expecting to find his beloved Rebecca. Instead he found his two brothers standing in front him holding Petunia, a 2 month old pig. Rebecca stepped up to Joe immediately, planting a firm slap upon his cheek.<\/p>\n \u201cHow dare you think I\u2019m a pig,\u201d she sharply said, and stormed off in the direction of the barn.<\/p>\n Joe was stunned. He looked over at his two brothers as if to say, \u201cWhat should I do now?\u201d Adam and Hoss were still laughing, but Adam could tell what his brother was thinking.<\/p>\n \u201cSorry Joe. We\u2019ve decided to leave this one alone.\u201d<\/p>\n Joe stood with eyes wide and mouth gaping, \u201cBut…\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNow it seems I remember someone telling us to mind our own business, brother?\u201d Hoss stated.<\/p>\n \u201cYes, I seem to remember that, too, Hoss. I\u2019m afraid you\u2019ll have to fight this battle alone, Joe.\u201d<\/p>\n Joe\u2019s temper was beginning to rise.<\/p>\n \u201cThat was a dirty trick. I oughta…\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYou \u2018oughta\u2019 go after your girl if you know what is good for you, Little Joe. Pa ain\u2019t gonna be too happy when we report your behavior to him you know.\u201d Hoss was always the caring one that liked to point out the obvious to his younger brother.<\/p>\n \u201cYes, I see many extra chores in your future and much less free time to court.\u201d Adam folded his arms and gave Joe that knowing smirk.<\/p>\n Joe pursed his lips together in disgust, but he knew his brothers were right. He turned and ran off in the direction Rebecca had gone leaving everyone to have one more good laugh at his expense.<\/p>\n Hoss waited until Joe was out of sight before turning towards the squealing pig in his arms, \u201c\u201cExcuse me, but don\u2019t you know me from somewhere?\u201d<\/p>\n Adam fluttered his eyes and brought his hand up to his chest in a feminine manner. \u201cNo, I don\u2019t think so young man.\u201d<\/p>\n Hoss let out a round of laughter before holding the pig up in such a way that he could look deep into its eyes. \u201cOh, that\u2019s right. I\u2019ve met you only in my dreams.\u201d<\/p>\n Adam slapped Hoss hardily on the back as the two walked away laughing, obviously quite pleased with themselves.<\/p>\n