{"id":7442,"date":"2012-02-10T12:07:00","date_gmt":"2012-02-10T17:07:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=7442"},"modified":"2025-02-27T12:25:01","modified_gmt":"2025-02-27T17:25:01","slug":"it-was-like-this-pa","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=7442","title":{"rendered":"It Was Like This Pa… (by slaine89)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Summary: \u00a0<\/span>How exactly do the boys end up in jail during a trip to San Francisco? Ben isn’t sure whether he wants to find out or not in this short comedic fic that includes a pickpocket, saloon girls, one crazily jealous fiance, and naked Cartwrights in a brothel.<\/p>\n

Rated:\u00a0 T (2,655 words)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It Was Like This Pa…<\/strong><\/p>\n

The sheriff\u2019s eyes looked tired as they glanced up at Ben Cartwright. He could understand that; it was nearly four in the morning, and Ben had already had a pretty sleepless night himself.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re the father then?\u201d the sheriff asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s right.\u201d As he spoke he couldn\u2019t help but wonder exactly to what he was admitting.<\/p>\n

\u201cRight this way.\u201d The sheriff led him out back and unlocked the cell door. Ben stepped inside and surveyed the occupants with his arms crossed over his chest. His three sons sat side by side, with guilty grimaces on his face. Ben knew the look well; it meant he was in for a story.<\/p>\n

\u201cLast I knew you three said you were going back to the hotel room \u2013 directly back, I believe were your exact words.\u201d He finally said.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe were.\u201d Adam spoke.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen I got back from dinner with Colonel Riker you weren\u2019t there. And when I asked, they said you hadn\u2019t been in all night. Then I get a visit from the sheriff saying that you three were locked up down here. He didn\u2019t say why or what had happened, just that you were in jail. Now will one of you please explain to me what this is all about?\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe and Hoss instantly looked to Adam. It was a habit really; Big Brother was always good at smoothing down Pa\u2019s feathers. Adam sighed and began the story, sincerely doubting his ability to calm Pa down this time. But if his chance was doubtful, Hoss\u2019 and Joe\u2019s chance was downright nonexistent.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, you see Pa, it was like this: we were on our way back to the hotel room when we ran into Jerry Howe. You remember Jerry; he worked a few drives a couple years ago.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell we figured you\u2019d be at the Colonel\u2019s for a while, so we had time to go to the saloon and get a drink with him.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben nodded again. So far so good, but he was still waiting for the story to take a turn for the worse. But Adam seemed a little hesitant to go on, so Hoss picked up the story.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere was a saloon girl in there that kept looking over in our direction.\u201d He said. \u201cJoe and Adam thought she was real perty.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI still say she was looking at me.\u201d Joe muttered.<\/p>\n

\u201cIn your dreams.\u201d Adam said.<\/p>\n

\u201cBoys!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSorry Pa. So while Joe and Adam were distracted, Jerry and I went out to look at his horse. The livery stable was right across the street.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLeave it to Hoss to be more interested in piece of horseflesh than in a piece of\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, sir.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss frowned at Joe and then looked back to his father. \u201cAnyhow, when I came back to the saloon, they were gone.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI thought I told you boys to stay together.\u201d Ben said.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe hadn\u2019t gone far, just around back. See, while we were\u2026 distracted, someone managed to steal out wallets.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShe must have been quite a girl.\u201d Ben mused.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh she was.\u201d Joe smiled.<\/p>\n

Now it was Adam\u2019s turn to glare at Joe. \u201cHe was a professional pickpocket. And the only reason we figured out he\u2019d robbed us was because Joe finally got up the nerve to ask the girl for a drink. Only when he went for his wallet, it was gone.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019d shuffled against us earlier, so when we saw him slip out the door, we followed him into the alley. He didn\u2019t realize it was a dead end.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd then you arrested him?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, not exactly.\u201d Joe shifted uncomfortably.<\/p>\n

\u201cThen what?\u201d Ben looked from one son to the other, making note of their matching black eyes. \u201cDon\u2019t tell me that one man managed to get the best of both of you?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, sir.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, sir. But he was a big man!\u201d Joe added.<\/p>\n

\u201cOne hundred and fifty pounds soaking wet.\u201d Hoss said, smirking.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell he was fast!\u201d Joe retorted. \u201cHe was at Adam and I before we could even blink, and then he was out of that alley like a cat.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo he got away with your wallets.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot exactly.\u201d Adam glanced at Hoss. \u201cHe sort of ran into a problem.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLiterally.\u201d Hoss said. \u201cSmashed right into me and fell to the ground. We got him picked up and took him over to the jail.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat was when we found out he was a professional.\u201d Joe added.<\/p>\n

\u201cI see.\u201d Ben looked at his sons. \u201cSo how do we get from you boys putting a man behind bars to being behind them yourselves?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThe sheriff turned out his pockets and found not only our wallets, but the purse of the girl at the saloon.\u201d Joe explained. \u201cSo we went back to the saloon, only she\u2019d gone home for the night.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd you couldn\u2019t have just left her things with the sheriff?\u201d Ben knew the answer to that question. The boys couldn\u2019t have turned down a chance to play hero to a young lady. They were his sons after all.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe thought she\u2019d be worried.\u201d Joe said. \u201cSo we asked at the saloon, and this one fella, Carl, said that he knew where she lived and that he was going that way.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd you all three went with him.\u201d Ben looked from one son to the other and read the answer in their uncomfortable faces. \u201cDidn\u2019t I teach you boys any common sense?\u201d He looked desperately at Adam, the one who he would have thought would have had some suspicions about this man. But Adam looked away.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe really was quite a girl, Pa.\u201d he muttered.<\/p>\n

Ben sighed in resignation. \u201cWhat happened next?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe didn\u2019t lead us to her house.\u201d Hoss answered.<\/p>\n

\u201cReally?\u201d Ben asked in mock disbelief. Hoss glanced down, abashed.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, sir. He led us a ways away from the, uh, better part of the city to where he had some\u2026 friends.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMore thieves?\u201d Ben guessed.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey didn\u2019t get our wallets!\u201d Joe piped in. \u201cJust the reward money we got for capturing the pickpocket.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd how did he know you had reward money?\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s face fell. \u201cWe might have mentioned it in the saloon a couple of times.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cA couple of times?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe more.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut we put up a fight.\u201d Hoss added. \u201cSasha said it was one of the best fights she\u2019d seen.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSasha?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThe girl Adam agreed to walk home at the end of her shift.\u201d Hoss scooted a little farther away from the smoldering look his brother gave him.<\/p>\n

\u201cAnother girl, Adam?\u201d Ben glanced at his son. \u201cWhat happened to the other one?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShe had to go a ways and it was late, Pa. I figured she\u2019d be safer with us.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, she\u2019d be much safer with a group of young men who can\u2019t even hold on to their wallets and go trooping off into a city with a stranger after bragging about having a large sum of money in their pockets.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe did get her home, Pa.\u201d Joe protested. \u201cNice and safe, even with her fianc\u00e9e shooting at us.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShooting?\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe suddenly looked sorry that he\u2019d said anything at all. Maybe he was still slightly drunk. \u201cIt was nothing. He just wanted the watch back.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThe watch?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019d taken it from her when they were engaged, but now that the engagement is off, she wanted it back.\u201d Hoss explained.<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd why did you feel that this was any of your business?\u201d Ben waited for several moments. \u201cWell?\u201d He demanded.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, you see, it was kind of our fault that they called the engagement off.\u201d Adam said carefully.<\/p>\n

\u201cYour fault?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMostly Joe\u2019s.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNow wait a minute\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy am I not surprised?\u201d Ben interrupted Joe. \u201cWell? Tell me what happened.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt was like this, Pa: when we went back to the saloon and the other girl was gone, I figured we might as well spend a little of the reward money. So I bought drinks for the house. And then a few for me.\u201d He added the last part quickly. \u201cAnd that\u2019s how we met Sasha; she was the girl that took over for the other girl at the end of her shift.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut you were walking her home. After her shift was done.\u201d Understanding dawned on Ben. \u201cSo you tell me you spent the next few hours drinking with this young woman?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe wanted to celebrate capturing the criminal.\u201d Joe said sheepishly.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe didn\u2019t stay the whole shift, Pa.\u201d Hoss said. \u201cWhen Clay, her fianc\u00e9e came in and saw her with Joe, well, he got a little jealous. That\u2019s how they broke the engagement off.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd that\u2019s how you got your bloody lip?\u201d Ben asked.<\/p>\n

Joe nodded. \u201cI wanted to be done after that, but Adam wanted to find the first girl and give her back her purse. That\u2019s when we met Carl. When we left, Sasha asked Adam to walk her home.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo then Clay decided to follow and shoot the lot of you?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot exactly.\u201d Adam muttered.<\/p>\n

\u201cThen what?\u201d Ben followed Joe and Adam\u2019s looks to Hoss, who was turning bright red. \u201cHoss?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThe watch had been given to her by her grandmother, Pa.\u201d he blurted out. \u201cShe just wanted it back. And I felt bad that we\u2019d all been misled by Carl, so I offered to go with her to get it back. Only Clay didn\u2019t want to give it to her. That\u2019s why he was shooting at us.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo you robbed a man for a watch.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLegally speaking it was hers.\u201d Adam put in.<\/p>\n

\u201cLegally speaking, you boys could all be admitted into an asylum for the lack of thinking that has occurred tonight.\u201d<\/p>\n

The three exchanged squirming looks, each waiting for the other to speak. Finally Adam gave in.<\/p>\n

\u201cSasha knew where the other girl lived, so she offered to take us there. She just wanted to stop by her house and drop off the watch. She lived in a more\u2026 questionable part of the city.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cQuestionable? And where was that exactly?\u201d<\/p>\n

More squirms. This time it was Joe who found his tongue. \u201cA brothel.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI see.\u201d Ben reflected that maybe it was a good thing the boys had lost all their money.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe waited outside, Pa!\u201d Joe added quickly. \u201cExcept, well, then Clay turned up. So we ducked inside the closest door.\u201d He didn\u2019t have to say anything else; the rapidly rising blush on his face said it all. Hoss looked like he\u2019d swallowed an eel with the way he kept squirming. Only Adam was composed enough to continue the story.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe apologized and asked if we could hide there for a while. The girls didn\u2019t seem to mind.\u201d He said. \u201cThen Clay started yelling for Sasha.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe didn\u2019t want to shoot at him because of all the women around. So we hollered down to him\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHollered down? I thought you were on the first floor.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe were. Then we went upstairs to look for Sasha. We thought maybe if she went out and talked to him, he would cool down, only\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShe was gone.\u201d Ben finished the sentence for him.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, sir.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben didn\u2019t sa1y anything. First of all because he couldn\u2019t decide between the millions of things that he wanted to say and secondly because the look on his sons\u2019 faces said it all. So he just waited for one of them to continue.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe ended up sneaking out the back door.\u201d Adam finally said. \u201cClay had gone on to look somewhere else.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo why didn\u2019t you come back to the hotel?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe tried. But then we had to hide again.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI thought you said Clay had moved on.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe did.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo why were you hiding?\u201d Ben\u2019s gaze moved from Adam, to Hoss, to Joe, and then back to Adam.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe didn\u2019t want anyone to see us, Pa.\u201d Joe said in a small voice.<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd why not?\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe looked away. Adam cleared his throat, and Hoss suddenly became very interested in the hem of his shirt.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy not?\u201d Ben\u2019s tone was raised to a dangerous level that made their heads snap up by habit.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe didn\u2019t have any clothes on, Pa.\u201d Joe finally said.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat happened to them?\u201d Now the tone was low, low and deadly. Joe snapped his mouth shut.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt was their idea.\u201d Adam said. \u201cThe girls at the brothel. They figured the easiest way to hide from Clay would be to pretend to be customers.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben didn\u2019t know whether to yell or laugh. He somehow managed to keep his voice level as he asked, \u201cAnd did it work?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh it worked.\u201d Joe said. \u201cOnly we didn\u2019t get our clothes when we snuck out because he was still in the front. I guess he wanted to forget about Sasha.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo you ended up sneaking naked through the red light district of San Francisco in the middle of the night.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut we weren\u2019t being shot at anymore.\u201d Hoss chimed in.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhere did you get the clothes you\u2019re wearing?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThe sheriff got them for us after he arrested us for the fire.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThe fire?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, sir.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben rubbed his forehead. He should have known this couldn\u2019t be a simple matter of his sons running down the street naked. \u201cHow does the fire figure in?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe went inside another brothel to avoid some people.\u201d Hoss said. \u201cOnly it looked like they were coming in, so we ducked inside a room. But the room was\u2026\u201d he stopped and looked to Adam.<\/p>\n

\u201cOccupied.\u201d Adam supplied. \u201cVery occupied.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd the occupant was angry.\u201d Joe added. \u201cVery angry.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe hurled a lamp at our heads.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd started a fire.\u201d Ben finished.<\/p>\n

\u201cTurns out the perfume they drench everything in is flammable.\u201d Adam said. \u201cVery, very, very flammable.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut we got it put out.\u201d Hoss said. \u201cThen the sheriff brought us here.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIs that the end?\u201d Ben asked. \u201cOr is there more to it? Maybe a fight with a professional boxer or a run in with a wild bull? How about a travelling circus?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, that\u2019s the end.\u201d Adam said. Then they waited. Ben knew what they were waiting for. He stood, and automatically they all flinched. But instead he turned away.<\/p>\n

\u201cGo back to the hotel, boys. I\u2019ll sort things out with the sheriff.\u201d He whirled around. \u201cDirectly back to the hotel. Is that clear?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, sir.\u201d His sons scooted out of the cell like three mice around a cat. Ben watched them go and waited for the door to close behind them before allowing himself a smile. Then a small chuckle. It certainly had been a night, one that they wouldn\u2019t forget for a while, mostly because he wouldn\u2019t let them forget it. They\u2019d be working hard to repay him after he forked over money to pay for the damages.<\/p>\n

Ben smiled again. Boys would be boys, and he supposed he should just be glad the only damage was a couple of burned houses and some ruined nights for a few brothel customers. Actually this was small potatoes compared to some of the things he and his brother had pulled off when they were young. There was nothing he could say that would make the lesson sink in any more than it already had. He went out and paid the sheriff and then instead of going back to the hotel went across the street to the saloon. There was time for him to get a drink before going back to the hotel.<\/p>\n

He could picture the boys sitting in the hotel wondering what he would say or do to them when he got back. He\u2019d let them sweat it out a bit before he let them off. After all, he couldn\u2019t be too easy on them.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Summary: \u00a0How exactly do the boys end up in jail during a trip to San Francisco? Ben isn’t sure whether he wants to find out or not in this short comedic fic that includes a pickpocket, saloon girls, one crazily jealous fiance, and naked Cartwrights in a brothel. \u00a0<\/p>\n

Rated:\u00a0 T (2,655 words)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":216,"featured_media":3763,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"template-full-width-post.php","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_members_access_role":[],"_members_access_error":""},"categories":[23,4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7442","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-drama","category-humor","wpcat-23-id","wpcat-4-id"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/bens-3-sons.jpg?fit=960%2C720&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7442","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/216"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=7442"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7442\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/3763"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=7442"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=7442"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=7442"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}