{"id":9856,"date":"2014-10-25T10:11:34","date_gmt":"2014-10-25T14:11:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=9856"},"modified":"2025-02-18T19:11:35","modified_gmt":"2025-02-19T00:11:35","slug":"very-bad-and-then-very-good","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=9856","title":{"rendered":"Adam’s Very Bad Year and Very Good Years (by BettyHT)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Summary:\u00a0 <\/strong>Adam has a lot of things go wrong for him on the Ponderosa causing him to leave. \u00a0His travels and accomplishments are fulfilling, but despite all the people he meets, he longs for his home and family. \u00a0Note:\u00a0 This posting contains two stories.<\/strong><\/p>\n

WC = 62739\u00a0 rating = T<\/p>\n

Very Series:<\/strong><\/p>\n

Adam’s Very Bad Week<\/a>
\nVery Bad and Then Very Good<\/a>
\nVery Much a Cartwright<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

Adam\u2019s Very Bad Year<\/strong><\/p>\n

Chapter 1<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cHow\u2019d you like it if you was building a dream and it all come crashing down on ya? And your cousin was the one who pulled out the cornerstone?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, he has said over and over that he\u2019s fine with it. He said he wished them well. How could it still be bothering him more than a year later?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, I jest know it is. He always says he\u2019s fine when he ain\u2019t. He\u2019s gotta have a hole in him or be so sick he can\u2019t stand before he tells ya he needs help. Even then, it better be a big hole or he jest says it burned his hide some. He came back from finding that Tom Burns fella, and he was hurting something fierce. I could tell, but he won\u2019t talk about it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou think it was a woman?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHeck, sometimes he falls in love even faster than you. I think maybe it was. I never seen him so down and out over a woman though. I guess after so many times having it go wrong, it gets harder and harder. I know it does for me. I keep thinking I got it all, and then I\u2019m left with ashes. It hurts every time, and Adam\u2019s been through that even more than me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou may be right. The only time he perked up lately was when Margarita Miguel was here. It\u2019s too bad that marriage to Don Luis went through. I think Adam kinda liked her. He sure showed a bit more spirit when she was around even if it was just being angry with her. He sure did give it to her though. I may never get that image out of my mind of him spanking her after she broke that guitar over your head.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI got quite a kick out of Don Luis pushing him into the water. Now that was a sight to see. Pa was funny the way he looked at Adam in the pond and shook his head.\u201d<\/p>\n

Unfortunately Joe ended the pleasant memories with his next question. \u201cSo you gonna give him that letter from Laura?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI guess I gotta, but I sure don\u2019t want to do it. It\u2019s like she\u2019s twisting the knife she stuck in his back bragging about how good things are with Will and how happy Peggy is now.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe she\u2019s only trying to reassure him that everything is all right and he made the right decision.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe, but she\u2019s so damn dumb, just plain dumb too, not knowing how it would hurt Adam for her to be writing all that stuff. I know he\u2019s better of without her, but he sure misses Peggy.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd the chance to have a family.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYup. Well I guess we gotta get this over with. Let\u2019s go give him the letter we picked up in town.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s this \u2018we\u2019 stuff? You got the mail. You give it to him.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, pretty much as I figured. You know how much it bothers him to get these letters every month.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe this time, hand him a glass of brandy before you hand him the letter?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou know he won\u2019t drink it. He won\u2019t admit it hurts that much.\u201d With his head down, Hoss walked to the house with the letter from Laura in his hand. When he got in the house, he found Adam and Ben talking at the desk about Adam\u2019s idea to go to St. Louis for some horse breeding stock that was for sale. Hoss handed Adam the letter, and he folded it before putting it in his pocket.<\/p>\n

Ben noted that Adam\u2019s relaxed posture was replaced by a more rigid one and a stony look. He looked at Hoss who shrugged. That was all Ben needed to know about the letter. It had to be another one of those from Laura. They arrived almost like clockwork on or near the first of every month. She probably had decided it was her duty to do this and likely nothing would stop her. Ben had considered writing her a letter asking her to stop, but that would only have opened up another issue. Then Laura would know that Adam had been heartbroken when she left. Ben had no idea what that scatter-brained woman would do if she knew that, but he had to be concerned about it. He knew Adam was hurt by each of these letters reminding him again that he had lost a chance to have his own home and a family. Yet, Ben saw no solution. If they tossed them in the fireplace, Laura would wonder why there was no letter in response to hers. Ben had no way to predict how a woman like Laura would react to anything. So each month, they suffered through the time when Adam read the letter and the sadness he had afterwards. The winter had been the worst. Adam could be a mean one, and when he had no way to work out his feelings, he took them out on his family. He was always so sorry afterwards, but his pain became their pain in more ways than one. Before dinner, Adam sat in the blue chair that he favored, read the letter, and then balled it up to throw it in the fire. Waiting to see if Adam would say anything, Ben decided to be direct.<\/p>\n

\u201cLaura have anything important to say.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou know how she could just prattle on. Oh, she and Will are going to have a baby soon. That\u2019s about it. I suppose we should send something.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben was glad that enough time had passed to know that she wasn\u2019t with child when she was still engaged to Adam. He had worried about that possibility for months. Now that wasn\u2019t a worry, but the effect on Adam was still to be determined. There was a lot of work to be done so at least there was something to keep Adam focused, and he could also work off that negative energy.<\/p>\n

It didn\u2019t take long though to see the effect. Joe and Adam were working with a string of horses that had to be broken and ready for the Army in two weeks. That meant a lot of hard and sometimes dangerous work. Adam pushed too hard and that made Joe push too hard because he didn\u2019t want his older brother to do more than he was doing with the horses. When the two of them didn\u2019t show up in time for dinner, Hoss went to get them. He could hear the hollering as soon as he rounded the barn. They were still working. Hoss knew that it wasn\u2019t a good idea to break horses when you were overtired. It was dangerous enough if you were just tired. He wondered which brother was pushing which. He found out soon enough. He heard the calls.<\/p>\n

\u201cRide em, Adam.\u201d Joe\u2019s voice was the most high-pitched and the easiest to place. The other men were hollering too, and Adam was making the last ride of the day.<\/p>\n

\u201cKeep your head up.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWoo hoo, you got him now.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cGo, Adam, go.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss could see how weary Adam was by the look on his face, but he was holding his own with a big stallion. Joe moved over to stand by Hoss. \u201cI rode him twice today and got bucked off onto my butt about as fast as any horse ever did it to me. Adam\u2019s been riding him for a minute already at least. He\u2019s gotta be getting tired by now.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe was probably tired before he got on that animal.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe\u2019s excitement overrode his concern for his brother. \u201cNo, I mean the stallion. He\u2019s had three rides today. He\u2019s has to be getting tired. I think Adam\u2019s going to tame him.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cTired men make mistakes, Joe, and sometimes that gets em hurt.\u201d<\/p>\n

At that moment, the big stallion stopped bucking and stood heaving from his exertions. Adam maintained a tight grip on him as the two riders came in to help him get down. As they neared the stallion, he unexpectedly reared up. Adam was ready for it and held his seat getting the men to cheer again until the stallion dropped down and lowered his head as he did so jerking on the halter and catapulting Adam over his head and into the fence. The stallion would have charged and trampled Adam then if he could have but the two riders were close enough to bracket him and force him to the side. As soon as they could, they each had a lasso on him and took him from the breaking corral. As soon as they could, Hoss and Joe ran to where Adam lay stunned. He put up his hands for help when he saw his brothers standing over him.<\/p>\n

\u201cGosh, Adam, you had him. We\u2019ll get him now. Are you hurt?\u201d Joe was concerned especially after what Hoss had said.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m fine.\u201d<\/p>\n

There were those words again. It usually meant he was anything but fine. He didn\u2019t like anyone fussing over him. He walked stiffly to the gate which one of the men opened. As they walked to the house, Joe moved to Adam\u2019s side in case he needed assistance. Hoss walked behind and noted how slowly his older brother was walking and that he was favoring his right side. Hoss turned to one of the hands and told him to ride for the doctor.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou can tell him it\u2019s probably not an emergency, but Adam\u2019s favoring that bad hip of his. He needs the doc to check him out.\u201d<\/p>\n

In the house, Adam did his best to move so slowly that their father would not know that he was hurt. Ben was far more observant though than Adam wanted to admit. When Doctor Martin arrived, Adam was upset but Ben issued a challenge.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t need a doctor. I\u2019m fine.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThen get up out of that chair without lifting yourself with your arms. I saw you earlier and that was the only way you were able to get out of that chair and get to the dining table. Then after dinner you pushed yourself up using the table. If you\u2019re not hurt, stand up now and prove it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Of course Adam couldn\u2019t do that so he was resigned to having the doctor examine him. He made his way to the downstairs guest room in which he had been confined for a month about six years earlier with a cracked right pelvis and sacroiliac joint. It occasionally gave him some discomfort but was downright painful after crashing into a fence. A short time later, Paul came out and said Adam would be fine but needed to stay off horses for at least two weeks but under no circumstances should he get on a horse in less than a week.<\/p>\n

\u201cCan he ride in a wagon or carriage?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot for a few days, but after that, it shouldn\u2019t hurt him any but it could be a bit uncomfortable. I don\u2019t think he cracked anything this time, but the muscles have been injured and he has some nasty bruises. Some ice packs are in order again. It\u2019s a good thing he managed to protect his head. He hit that fence with a lot of force.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben bid Paul good night and then waited for the explosion he expected from Adam. It didn\u2019t take long.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t need to be taken care of like a boy. There was no reason to summon Paul for me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t. Someone else did.\u201d<\/p>\n

Looking at his brothers, Adam could tell immediately that Hoss had done that.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, you always say you\u2019re fine and sometime ya ain\u2019t. I just wanted to make sure.\u201d<\/p>\n

Sighing, Adam couldn\u2019t say much because he had a much more difficult time being perturbed with Hoss. They had been through too much together, and the bond between them was very strong. \u201cI know. I\u2019m sorry, but I didn\u2019t think I needed to see a doctor. Someone could have asked me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou woulda just said you were fine, and tomorrow you woulda been out there trying to do something you couldn\u2019t and you woulda got yourself hurt or maybe somebody else.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s eyes were dark as was his expression, but he couldn\u2019t say anything because Hoss was correct. He would have tried to work through it. It wouldn\u2019t have been a good idea, but he thought he needed to be doing something physical. The thought of being unable to work for a week was daunting. His father offered some things for him to do.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe need some new harness rigging for the carriage. You could do that. You also haven\u2019t finished the plans for the addition to the lumber mill, and we could use some new maps for planning our timber cutting.\u201d<\/p>\n

Nodding, Adam moved to sit in the blue chair. Hop Sing was there with an ice pack in hand. Adam took it and thanked him quietly. Uncharacteristically quiet, Hop Sing knew it was best not to stir these turbulent waters. He returned to the kitchen as silence reigned in the main room.\u00a0\u00a0 Ben picked up the newspaper to read, and Hoss and Joe got into a relatively quiet game of checkers. Adam went to bed early allowing the others to talk quietly about what had happened.<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, why did you let him keep going that long? The two of you should have been done at least two hours before he got hurt.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know, Pa. I kinda got caught up in the excitement, I guess. We were doing so well all day and got so many horses broke. It was like we couldn\u2019t do anything wrong. I\u2019m sorry.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s not your fault, son. I was only wondering what happened. I know how Adam gets about work sometimes, and I should have expected it after that letter from Laura. I don\u2019t know how to help him, and I don\u2019t think he knows how to help himself.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss had been sitting quietly. \u201cI\u2019m real worried about him. I asked him about Laura. He said he was wrong about Laura. Then he said he couldn\u2019t save Clegg, and he was wrong about Tom Wilson and about Howard. He said he almost messed up Margarita\u2019s marriage to Don Luis. He said when he thinks he\u2019s doing the right thing, it doesn\u2019t work out. He\u2019s real down on himself.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, he is down on himself, but boys, for the next week, he\u2019s going to be working here at the house. He\u2019s not going to like that so I ask if you could be even more considerate of his feelings. I don\u2019t want any arguments. Can you do that?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot such a problem for me and Hoss, Pa. We\u2019re gonna be gone most days from sun-up to sun-down. You\u2019re the one who\u2019s going to be trapped with the angry bear if you don’t come out to work with us.\u201d<\/p>\n

Nodding, Ben sighed deeply as the three of them turned down lamps and prepared to go to bed. There wasn\u2019t anything they could do for Adam, and it made them frustrated. Joe began thinking of what they might be able to do. He considered and rejected dozens of ideas over the next week until he hit on one he was sure would work. He just needed to convince Hoss and their father to go along with him on the scheme.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 2<\/strong><\/p>\n

The next morning, Joe began dropping hints about the widow who was trying to manage a small ranch next to theirs. Ben had offered to buy her out whenever she wanted, but she was determined to make a go of it was what she told him whenever she had the chance. She had arrived in town only a year before, purchased that small property, bought horses and a small herd, and set herself up as a rancher. She said she got the money as the inheritance when her husband died. Hoss wasn\u2019t yet aware of what Joe wanted to do so he engaged in the conversation unaware of where Joe hoped it would go.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s something a bit off about that one, though. I can\u2019t never put my finger on it, but she makes me feel a mite uncomfortable when I\u2019m talking with her.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben, also unaware of Joe\u2019s scheme, had to agree with Hoss. \u201cI don\u2019t know. Her story makes sense and yet I get the feeling there\u2019s a lot more to it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam had walked very stiffly that morning. Even without the doctor\u2019s pronouncement that he couldn\u2019t ride, it would have been obvious to everyone that he was too hurt to work horses or even to ride, but ever willing to champion an underdog especially if it was a woman, Adam joined in. \u201cPerhaps it\u2019s that she\u2019s so independent. It has to be difficult for her with all the town thinking it\u2019s wrong for a woman to try to live independently.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, she does need some help from a friend. I\u2019ve seen that some of her fences are about to fall over, and she\u2019s got a lot of stock that\u2019s unbranded.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen did you see that, Joe?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen I was working with the men last week to round up some of our strays. A lot of them were in the trees near her property line so we followed the fence lines to be sure none had strayed on to her property. We never saw her or any of her hands. She\u2019s a real nice looking woman. I wouldn\u2019t mind going over there to give her a hand.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLater this week, someone has to go to town to get supplies. That might be a good time to stop in there to see if she needs some help.\u201d After saying that, Ben looked over at Adam. He was the likely choice, which they all knew. \u201cWould you be willing to be the ambassador for our family to our neighbor?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFine, I\u2019ll go see if she needs any help not that I could do much for her right now.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOlder brother, you get tired of helping out the pretty lady or thinkin\u2019 you jest ain\u2019t up to the task, well, I wouldn\u2019t mind at all taking your place.\u201d Hoss was grinning as he said it because he meant it.<\/p>\n

Looking disappointed that their father had decided Adam was the one to go see Mrs. Reynolds, Joe thought his plan was working so well that perhaps he didn\u2019t need to include the others in it. Hoss especially would be more convincing if he was just being himself. He had to wait a few days to see if Adam would go along with his plan, but he wasn\u2019t disappointed. After three days of tolerating the paper work and the enforced inactivity, Adam was prowling around like a wounded cougar. At breakfast on the fourth morning, he announced he was going to town for supplies and the mail as well as to drop off some of the paperwork he had completed. Ben was happy because for three days now, he had been able to ride and enjoy the outdoors and leave the headaches of the paperwork and ledgers to Adam. Ben only asked if there was anything he had to do, and Adam told him only to sign some offers they were making. Hoss volunteered to harness up the carriage horse, and Adam thanked him because he had been dreading trying to do that himself. Ben reminded him to stop in to see if Mrs. Reynolds needed any assistance with anything.<\/p>\n

After making the trip to town, getting supplies loaded with help, and taking care of other errands, Adam headed to the widow\u2019s ranch. He realized he wasn\u2019t even sure of her first name. He would have to call her Mrs. Reynolds, which would be proper enough under the circumstances. He had not paid attention to her as his brothers had so he was pleasantly surprised to arrive finding her hanging wash on the line and looking quite stunning. She came to greet him as he pulled the carriage up in front of the house.<\/p>\n

\u201cGood afternoon, Mrs. Reynolds. I\u2019m Adam Cartwright. I hope it wasn\u2019t too presumptuous of me to stop by uninvited. My brother Joe told me that when he was riding our boundary lines looking for strays that it seemed you might need some assistance.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0 Adam could see her bristle at that although she kept her composure. He found the spirit she had to be attractive as was her looks. She was bareheaded and her hair was a bit in disarray from her work and from the wind. He had a sudden urge to reach up and push those stray locks back behind her ears. As they talked though, he managed to stay formal without a hint of what his mind was considering would be an exciting adventure.<\/p>\n

\u201cWelcome, Mr. Cartwright. I had to let the hands go as you probably surmised looking about the place. I couldn\u2019t afford to pay them enough to get them to stay. My foreman is out looking for some replacements but at low wages, I\u2019m not sure he will be successful nor that any he hires will be worth even the low wages I could pay.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou can call me Adam. If you refer to me as Mr. Cartwright, I\u2019m afraid I would be looking over my shoulder wondering when my father had arrived. If there is anything I could do to help, I would be pleased to do so.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Cartwright, I hope you are not offended by me saying it, but by the way you climbed down from that carriage, it seems perhaps that you need some care instead of some work.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMrs. Reynolds, I can assure you that it is only temporary. A mustang decided to throw me into a fence as we were having a disagreement over whether I should ride him or not. As you have certainly surmised, he won that round.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, perhaps you would like to come inside for a cup of coffee or a glass of lemonade then? We could talk about what help you might be able to give me, and I must admit the talk would be as much help to me as anything. It does get very lonely out here. I never realized how difficult that would be.\u201d<\/p>\n

Offering her his arm, Adam escorted Mrs. Reynolds inside after she accepted his arm with a slight smile. She was thinking along the same lines as Adam, but just as he had done, she had managed to stay formal without a hint of what she would really like to do. The man had the most kissable looking lips, and for her, it had been a long time since she had kissed anyone. As Adam and Mrs. Reynolds talked, Joe was talking with Hoss on the Ponderosa.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou did that on purpose?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course I did. Adam\u2019s been moping around ever since Laura left. Nothing seems to bring him up out of the hole he put himself in except for a woman. I thought she was pretty but she\u2019s quite a bit older than me. She has to be about Adam\u2019s age. She\u2019s got that pretty blond hair and she\u2019s pretty easy on the eyes too. Besides, I only planted the seed. If anything grows, that\u2019s all Adam\u2019s doing.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, you know how he hates being pushed into things. If he ever figures out that you made that suggestion jest to get him to get involved with her, he\u2019s gonna be upset with ya.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t push him. I brought up the idea, and all of you thought it was a good one, and Adam could have said no, but he didn\u2019t so it\u2019s all his doing if something happens between them.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI shur hopes it works out. Our older brother can\u2019t stand no more heartbreak this year. You don\u2019t know much about this lady. I\u2019m hoping she\u2019s a nice one. Another mess could be all it takes.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAll it takes for what?\u201d<\/p>\n

Realizing he would be breaking a confidence with Adam, Hoss couldn\u2019t say more, but Adam had mentioned to him on more than one occasion in the past year, that he was thinking that leaving the Ponderosa for a while might be a good idea. Hoss had done his best each time to convince him otherwise, but he still held the fear that Adam would leave at some point. \u201cNothing, Joe, nothing. I\u2019m only praying that it all works out. I don\u2019t want to have to see what happens if it don\u2019t. I really don\u2019t want to see that.\u201d<\/p>\n

For the first time, Joe wondered if his plan was a good one, but then he thought about it briefly. \u201cHoss, it\u2019s a lonely widow trying to run a ranch by herself, and she obviously needs some help. What could possibly go wrong with that?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, and Laura was a lonely widow too, and look how badly that went. Ya jest can never tell when something ya never expected happens. Whoever would have thought that Will would have gone behind Adam\u2019s back to take his fianc\u00e9 away? I\u2019m jest saying I\u2019m worried is all.\u201d<\/p>\n

On the Reynolds\u2019 ranch, Adam felt some vague feelings that things weren\u2019t quite right with Mrs. Reynolds\u2019 story. He ignored those feelings though because he had been so wrong so many times in the past year, he decided he would take things at face value. They had a very pleasant talk, and Adam agreed to come back the next day to help her fix her corral fence. He wouldn\u2019t be putting strain on his back and hip with that because it was mostly just hammering nails in and replacing a few boards. She said she had gotten the lumber needed but had not been able to do anything with it. Her foreman had been gone on some personal business and was expected back within a week or so. Adam agreed to help her out until the man returned hopefully with a few hands who could start getting needed work done on the ranch. When Adam said it was time to leave because his family would be wondering what had happened to him, she walked out onto the porch with him.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, thank you so much for stopping by. I have enjoyed our time together very much, and I look forward to seeing you tomorrow. I shall be very disappointed if you don\u2019t come over here as you said you would.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMrs. Reynolds, I keep my word. I\u2019ll be here tomorrow with tools and ready to work.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, Mrs. Reynolds sounds so formal now that we\u2019re getting to be friends. Why don\u2019t you just call me Rose? My father used to say I was as pretty as the yellow rose of Texas.\u201d She had decided that would be her name now. It suited her far better than the name her parents had given her at birth. She could use Rose as her name until she wanted to change it when she moved on. She knew she would have to move on sooner or later, but a dalliance with this handsome cowboy could certainly make the time alone go much faster.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, then, Rose, I will be here tomorrow.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThank you, Adam, for everything.\u201d She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek. She had the feeling that he wanted more, but she could wait a bit. She didn\u2019t want to seem too forward, and he wasn\u2019t the shy type. If he wanted more, she would likely know before much time had passed. She was rewarded with a dazzling grin for her efforts so she was sure she was correct in her assumptions. As he left, she watched and wondered what he would be like as a lover. He seemed to be a passionate man, and if she could ignite those passions, she was sure that they could have some wonderful times together.<\/p>\n

When Adam got home and seemed in a better mood, Joe nudged Hoss with his elbow as if to say he had told him so. Hoss and Joe offered to take care of the carriage and unloading the supplies. Adam thanked them and headed inside with the mail and some paperwork that needed to be done. He planned to work on that in the evening so that the next day would be free. As he worked on the paperwork later, Ben came to stand beside him.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t have to work on these tonight. They\u2019re not due for a few days.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI offered to help Mrs. Reynolds with a few small projects so I wanted to free up time.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, you offered to help Mrs. Reynolds with a few small projects. I hope you haven\u2019t agreed to do too much. You know what Paul said.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know, and nothing will involve riding or lifting heavy objects. Pa, I\u2019ll be fine.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben was thinking that those were famous last words, but Adam did seem happier, so he simply smiled and nodded. Joe looked smug, and Hoss still had a bit of a worried look. He still had a gut feeling that something wasn\u2019t quite right with the whole situation even if Adam was smiling and seemed to have thrown off that pall of sadness that had enveloped him of late.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 3<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cSo Don Luis felt duty bound, of course, to have to uphold his lady\u2019s honor, and he pushed me into the pond. I wasn\u2019t expecting that. Pa, stood up there on the bank looking disgusted and perplexed as to his oldest son\u2019s behavior and perhaps a bit concerned for his sanity.\u201d Adam had been telling stories as they worked on the corral fences. He did his best to keep the stories light and funny. Rose appreciated the entertainment and laughed frequently at the tales.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, Adam, you seem to have liked this Margarita very much.\u201d Rose saw a dark look pass over Adam\u2019s face. She wondered why, but wouldn\u2019t ask. She wanted to keep this relationship light and fun. \u201cOh, sweetie, I didn\u2019t mean to upset you.\u201d Rose put a hand on Adam\u2019s cheek and stepped very close to him looking up at him with anticipation. If she had guessed correctly, they were about to have their first kiss. She said nothing more but waited for his reaction to her proximity. He leaned down and kissed her softly. She slid her arms around his waist as he kissed her, and his arms wrapped around her pulling her close to him as he kissed her again but with more intensity. As she opened her lips, his tongue slid inside, and she knew she had him. He wanted her. It was only a matter of time before he was in her bed. But she didn\u2019t want to rush him, and broke the kiss after a few very delightful minutes. Adam dropped his arms at his side not at all sure what her reaction was going to be. He didn\u2019t know her well enough to even have a guess.<\/p>\n

Rose spoke first. \u201cI\u2019m sorry to have been so forward. I\u2019m not usually like this.<\/p>\n

\u201cI am very sorry too. I should not have taken such liberties after having known you only a short time.\u201d<\/p>\n

Smiling first, Rose chuckled next before laughing. Adam smiled not knowing what was so funny. \u201cUs. We both wanted that to happen and now we act as if we didn\u2019t. But we are going rather fast so perhaps we could agree to take it one step at a time?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI like that idea.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNow would you like to take a break and have some lunch? I have ham, bread, lemonade, and a fruit compote that should be just right about now.\u201d<\/p>\n

Offering his arm, Adam smiled. He liked Rose, and his misgivings about her story were forgotten as she smiled at him and took his arm. She did like him. He knew that, and he knew she wanted him. He needed that acceptance and her desire for him, and it weakened his defenses. As they ate lunch, they chatted about the ranch, Nevada, and the harsh winter they had recently endured. Rose brought the pot of coffee to the table after they ate. She refilled the cups and sat down looking at Adam. He was relaxed and content as he had been in a very long time. There were no challenges here. There were no recrimination and no harsh words nor bad memories to spoil the moment. He could simply relax and enjoy her company. She seemed to enjoy having him there as well. After they finished their coffee, Adam helped her clean up the kitchen before they headed back to the corral to work on the fence. They weren\u2019t done but at least three fourths of the fence was mended. Adam promised to come back the next day to finish it. He kissed her softly before mounting up for the ride home.<\/p>\n

At dinner that evening, Hoss and Joe were very excited about the next day, but Ben was worried. A number of robberies of banks and other businesses had been a problem for the area from Sacramento to Placerville. The men who did the robberies were always chased into the Sierras before the posses inevitably lost their trail. Over and over, the criminals had gotten away. Their latest robbery though was a small bank in Reno. The sheriff there had wired that the posse was tracking the robbers who seemed headed directly south. Sheriff Roy Coffee and the sheriff in Carson City were forming posses and were going to try to intercept the gang. Because of their experience in the mountains especially the west side of the Ponderosa, Hoss and Joe had been enlisted to help. The next morning, they were going to join up with Roy\u2019s posse and head toward the mountains hoping to catch sight of the men fleeing the posse from Reno. The Carson City posse would go in a more northerly direction and try to do the same.<\/p>\n

\u201cToo bad you\u2019re hurt, Adam, or you could come with us. I could use some help tracking and it\u2019s going to be a good thing to get rid of these men. All those raids and men wounded and a few killed. It\u2019s time to put a stop to them.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0 Hoss was far more serious about the endeavor than Joe who was itching for a fight with the gang.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019ll have them outgunned and outsmarted. They didn\u2019t know what they were doing when they decided to try this in Nevada.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0 Joe was enthusiastic about their prospects of success.<\/p>\n

Adam was more analytical. \u201cI don\u2019t know. They\u2019ve been operating like this for over a year. Whoever is in charge has done impeccable planning. They\u2019ve been successful every time they tried, and every time they get away cleanly as well. Be careful. These men are smart and dangerous.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, Adam, you sound almost as if you admire them. They\u2019re murderers and robbers.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know that, Joe, but it never hurts to respect the skills of your opponent. This gang is very dangerous and shouldn\u2019t be underestimated.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI agree with Adam. You boys need to be very careful out there tomorrow and until you\u2019re done with this posse business.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, you know Hoss won\u2019t let us do anything too dangerous. He\u2019s as careful as Adam is and sometimes more.\u201d As they moved from the dining table into the main room, Joe had to ask about Mrs. Reynolds. \u201cHey, Adam, how\u2019s it going with the widow lady?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFine. I\u2019m going back tomorrow to help her finish the corral fence. That might be it. She said her foreman is due back from some personal business soon, and was supposed to hire some men to work for her. They can get to the branding and the fence lines.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe was very curious. \u201cSo, what do you think of her? I think she\u2019s pretty.\u201d<\/p>\n

Looking at Joe and wondering what he wanted to know with his questions, Adam was slow in answering. He didn\u2019t know if Joe was jealous because that could lead to all sorts of problems. He finally answered rather noncommittally. \u201cI agree. She\u2019s pretty.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s it? Didn\u2019t you get to know her some? You\u2019ve been there all day and you saw her the day before too.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019ve been working on the corral fence. She helps hold up the boards, and I nail them on. We had lunch together and talked about the weather, Nevada, what she needs to get done on her ranch, and the awful winter we had. Is there something specific I should ask her that you want to know?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I was wondering what you thought of her. I mean, there\u2019s a dance coming up, and I wondered if you would consider asking her to go. You know, she\u2019s a widow and new to the area. She doesn\u2019t know many people here.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss wanted Joe to stop talking because he could see how thoughtful Adam was looking. He was figuring out Joe\u2019s scheme, and if there was going to be trouble because of that, it was going to be soon. \u201cJoe, why don\u2019t you settle down to our checkers game? All this talking can wait until some other time.\u201d<\/p>\n

Realizing that his interrogation was giving away his scheme, Joe moved to sit across from Hoss so they could play checkers. Adam sat in his chair holding a book but not reading as he stared first at his brothers and then into the fireplace at the small fire burning there. Ben saw the look, and because he had drawn the same conclusion as Adam, wondered how he did feel about Mrs. Reynolds. He certainly had been in a better mood since the day before. Ben didn\u2019t know if that was the influence of the neighbor or that Adam was able to get out of the house and do something physical. He hoped there was no more trouble brewing because he worried what Adam would do if there was another heartache or disappointment that he had to face.<\/p>\n

The next morning, Hoss and Joe were up early to leave to rendezvous with the posse. By the time Adam finished breakfast, he realized he would have to ask his father to hitch up the carriage or he would have to do it himself. Unwilling to let his father know that he was so sore that that would be a difficult task, he decided to do it himself. By the time he finished, he was sweating and knew he would pay a price for all that lifting. But he had promised Rose that he would be there that morning, so he climbed into the carriage for the ride. When he got there, he did his best to hide his aching back and hip but apparently not too successfully.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat happened? Did you hurt yourself again?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re very observant. No, but I did hitch up the carriage myself, and that was a bit of a strain.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cA bit of a strain? You look like you\u2019re having trouble walking much less working. When we go in for lunch, I\u2019ll put warm compresses on your back and hip to soothe the muscles unless you would like to do that now.\u201d<\/p>\n

A little surprised at her pronouncement and the two choices she had given him, Adam only said he could wait. Then he wondered why he hadn\u2019t said he didn\u2019t need her to do that. He realized as he thought about it, that the prospect of her helping him like that was very desirable. He smiled as he worked, and she had to ask why.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m looking forward to having this project done and having lunch with you.\u201d<\/p>\n

Rose smiled. She suspected it was much more than that which had caused that smile. She very much liked that smile. She truly liked this man and looked forward to spending as much time with him as she could. As Adam nailed in the last board, she moved to his side.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt looks very good. Thank you so much for your help. I couldn\u2019t have done this by myself.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen your foreman gets back with some hands, more of the work can get done around here. The place will start looking very good. You\u2019ll be happy here.\u201d As Adam said that, he realized he would miss her even though he had known her all of three days.<\/p>\n

\u201cI will if you continue to visit and be my friend.\u201d<\/p>\n

By then they were very close so the kiss was expected. The two of them wrapped arms around each other and enjoyed the physical intimacy. Adam was well aware that he knew very little about Rose, but he liked her and being with her made him feel better. For the time being, he decided that was enough. \u201cI\u2019ll visit as often as you like.\u201d<\/p>\n

Looking up rather demurely at him, Rose had another question. \u201cWould every day be too often?\u201d Then she smiled. Adam laughed and told her they were going to take it one day at a time. She agreed as they walked to the house. In the house as Rose got things together for lunch, she put a heavy muslin bag in the warmer compartment of the stove. Adam had to ask what that was.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, people heat bricks to warm the foot of the bed or to warm someone who has taken a chill, but they don\u2019t bend. The bag is full of small broken bits of brick. They absorb the heat just like a solid brick, but the bag is more flexible of course so you can wrap it around an arm or an ankle or in this case across someone\u2019s lower back. It helps the muscles relax. If you like, I could massage those muscles after I get them heated up.\u201d<\/p>\n

All sorts of ideas and images flashed through Adam\u2019s mind when she said that. \u201cNo, I think warming them up ought to be enough.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t know that. You\u2019ve never had a massage from me.\u201d Rose smiled again and served lunch. She sat very close to Adam so that her leg touched his as they sat on chairs. After lunch, she told him to lean forward and rest his head on his arms on the table. He did and felt the warmth immediately when she placed the bag across his lower back and hip. He heard her cleaning up the dishes from lunch and then it was very quiet. He waited and wondered what she had planned next. \u201cThis will work better if you\u2019re lying down. I removed the pillows from the bed in the guest room. I want you to lay on your stomach on the bed and then I\u2019ll put this on your back again.\u201d<\/p>\n

Wondering if she was intent on helping his back or seducing him, Adam followed her instructions including pulling off his boots before lying on the bed. Then she placed the muslin sack over his lower back once more. After about twenty minutes, he felt her remove the sack but then her cool hands began working the sore and injured muscles.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s too much. They\u2019re warmed up just fine. You need to stop.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI think you know perfectly well why.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t mind. In fact it\u2019s good to know I can still have that effect on a man.\u201d<\/p>\n

Lifting his upper body and turning, Adam was going to insist she stop, but instead he pulled her into his arms beside him on the bed. They kissed and touched. \u201cAre you sure you want this?\u201d His answer was a passionate kiss. Almost without thinking about it, he was unbuttoning her shirtwaist dress. They kissed, touched, and made love to each other. Resting in Adam\u2019s arms later, Rose only had one thing to say.<\/p>\n

\u201cThank you. I needed to have someone show me that I am still desirable.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLady, you are a heck of a lot more than just desirable, but I do need to head for home. My brothers are out with a posse, and I need to see if there\u2019s anything I have to do at home while they\u2019re gone.\u201d Adam kissed her and then stood up to begin dressing.<\/p>\n

Rose felt her heart rate speed up. \u201cPosse? Who are they looking for?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cA gang of robbers that\u2019s been active in California but hit a small bank in Reno. The sheriff there wired out that they were heading in this direction. There are two posses waiting for them here, and of course, one chasing them from Reno. My brother Hoss is an excellent tracker. If they have come through anywhere near him, he\u2019ll know. Hopefully, the posses will put these men out of business once and for all.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course. It\u2019s not safe having criminals like that roaming about the countryside.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRose, if you\u2019re afraid, you could come stay at the Ponderosa until these men are caught. We have several guest rooms.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s only one room I\u2019d like to stay in.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m afraid my father wouldn\u2019t tolerate that.\u201d<\/p>\n

Rose was pulling on her dress and buttoning it up. \u201cI was only teasing. Adam, my foreman should be home by tomorrow. He should have hired some hands by now so we\u2019ll be as safe as anywhere.\u201d<\/p>\n

They walked arm-in-arm to Adam\u2019s carriage where they kissed goodbye. Adam drove off whistling a merry tune. Rose watched him go but had a worried expression. Soon after Adam was out of sight, four men rode into the yard. One dismounted and walked toward her.<\/p>\n

\u201cYour man ain\u2019t gonna like this.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 4<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cClint and I aren\u2019t married. He has no hold on me. I know he sees other women when I\u2019m not there.\u201d Rose was a bit defensive.<\/p>\n

\u201cViolet, you know it\u2019s different for a man than a woman. He\u2019s gonna be really mad about you taking another man to your bed.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRoscoe, a kiss isn\u2019t the same as taking a man to my bed. And my name is Rose Reynolds now. Just be sure to call me Mrs. Reynolds when anybody is around.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFine, but we saw ya. We saw ya go in and how long it took to come out. We saw that you were in the bedroom. Couldn\u2019t see exactly what happened, but a man and a woman in a bedroom, well, it don\u2019t take too much imagination. Clint\u2019s gonna figure it out.\u201d Roscoe never wanted to come between Violet and Clint. Violet was the organizer and the planner for their jobs, but Clint was a killer. He was handsome, charming, and about as trustworthy as a diamondback in your bedroll.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe won\u2019t figure it out, as you say, if you don\u2019t say anything. He\u2019s got another month to serve. By the time he gets here, there doesn\u2019t have to be any reason for anyone to say anything. You don\u2019t name the women he\u2019s with whenever he does that.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cVi, uh Rose, he don\u2019t never get personal about it though. He\u2019s with em and then he\u2019s gone. It looked like this one of yours is kinda personal.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cEnough of that. Just keep it to yourselves and everything will be fine. Haven\u2019t I always done the planning and aren\u2019t all of you safe because I work out all the details. Did you know there are three posses out looking for you right now? Did you follow the map just as I drew it out for you?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course we did. We know you plan well. We\u2019re living mighty fine with your planning, but this man of yours could mess it all up. Your idea to do that job in Reno while he\u2019s sitting in a jail in Placerville ought to convince them that he\u2019s not part of our gang.\u201d Roscoe signaled to the other three men to head for the stable telling them to take care of his horse too. Once they were out of earshot, he had a question. \u201cSay, what do we do about the extra man. Is he part of our gang permanent like or just until we can get rid of him?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHow did he do?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe did what we told him to do, he stayed cool, and he ain\u2019t no complainer.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLet\u2019s tell him, he\u2019s in then. We won\u2019t do another job for at least a month, so you can relax around here and go spend some money in town as long as you don\u2019t overdo it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe won\u2019t. Even the new guy understood when I told him we only get to spend wild when we\u2019re a long way from here. Maybe we could work in a trip to have us some fun while we wait for Clint.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFirst, we have to make it look like you\u2019re working the ranch here. Once you fix a few fences and brand the cattle, you could drive some to market and then have a good time there. No one would think twice about cowboys spending money in a cattle town.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat all sounds good except the branding and the fence mending. Do we really have to do all of that?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIf we want this as a safe hideout, we do. We\u2019re going to hide in plain sight this time. There\u2019ll be no running to the mountains and living in a cave.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, when you put it that way, it does sound a hell of a lot better. All right, I\u2019ll explain it to the boys. You got all we need in the bunkhouse?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, there\u2019s whisky, clean clothes, nice comfy beds, tobacco, and some games and cards. We have to make it look like a normal ranch, so I\u2019ll cook up dinners for you in the house, and then you can carry it to the bunkhouse to eat. I got the smokehouse well stocked so we won\u2019t need to send anyone to town for supplies for at least a week. By then, those posses ought to be frustrated enough to quit. The four of you can split the take from Reno four ways. It\u2019s kind of a bonus for setting up a cover for Clint.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, he\u2019s in jail for shooting that tinhorn gambler, but now they\u2019ll never tie him in with us. He had a lot of money on him. That was a stupid ass mistake on his part, but you cooking up that scheme was real smart of ya, Vi, uh, Rose. Damn, that\u2019s gonna take some getting used to.\u201d With that, Roscoe headed to the bunkhouse and Rose walked back into the house. She would introduce Roscoe as the foreman when Adam returned for she had no doubt he would return. A man who could show such passion but still be gentle in his lovemaking was not one who would walk away. She smiled and then frowned as she went from being happy about the time she spent with him and then worrying about where this path could lead her. She had spent her life so far avoiding mistakes that could cost her freedom or her life. She wondered if she had just made that kind of mistake.<\/p>\n

Rose had not made any mistake in her plan for her gang to elude the posses. She had stashed fresh horses for them in the mountains at two locations. They had been instructed to follow an exact route she had mapped out, which had even included some alternative routes if the posse got too close. With the fresh horses and even with the doubling back they had done a number of times, they were still two days ahead of where the posses thought they likely would be. She hoped now that they would get some rainfall. If they did, ten of the best trackers in the west would never follow their trail out of the mountains if they ever found it in the first place.<\/p>\n

That was exactly the problem the posses were having. Two of them had found nothing at all. Hoss had found a trail and lost it at least a dozen times. He was getting very frustrated.<\/p>\n

\u201cDadburnit, Joe, they doubled back and then went into a stream and out on gravel. Finding that trail took about ten times as much time as they took to make it. They\u2019re gonna be long gone at this rate. I wish Adam was here to help.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, Hoss, I\u2019m here. I can help track.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know and I\u2019m grateful for the help, but we both work the same way. Adam is more like them Paiute. They kinda take a look around and sense where their enemy has gone.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo he guesses well. We could try that.\u201d
\nPausing, Hoss looked over at Joe and smiled a grim smile. \u201cYou know, little brother, I think you\u2019re right.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI am?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYep, you\u2019re right. With the tracks they been leaving for us, we\u2019ll never catch em. Maybe, just maybe, if we make a couple guesses, we might get lucky. It\u2019ll be a sight better than what we\u2019re doing now. Let\u2019s go talk to Roy.\u201d<\/p>\n

Roy was reluctant but had to agree to the logic of Hoss\u2019 argument. They planned to camp for the night and then meet up with at least one of the other posses the next day. They would split up into smaller groups of four each and each small group would take their best guess and follow it. Hopefully one of them might find where the gang had gone. The plan worked out by the end of the next day, but they were still no closer to finding the gang. Hoss and his group found the trail into a broad valley that led in the direction of the Ponderosa, Carson City, or Virginia City. When the other groups rendezvoused with them, they discussed what to do next.<\/p>\n

\u201cRoy, we\u2019re going to be cutting across pasture land and roads. Any one of those places could wipe out any useful tracks. I found the tracks but they look to be at least two days old. They could be almost anywhere by now.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, that may be true, but we\u2019ll follow em tomorrow morning as soon as it\u2019s light and see where they go. At least we should get a general direction. We could send wires then for the law to be on the lookout for four men with money to spend.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRoy, it looks like rain is coming in. We may not have that much time to track them tomorrow.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019ll do what we can, Hoss. It\u2019s all we can do.\u201d<\/p>\n

The men for whom they were searching had gotten started working on the Reynolds Ranch. Adam had come over that morning to see if Rose needed any help and was introduced to Roscoe. Roscoe seemed a decent sort but didn\u2019t seem to have a good idea of how to work a ranch. He and Adam talked for a short time. Roscoe went to get the men organized then as Adam walked back to Rose.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe talked and the branding seems to be the most important thing right now. That way even with your fences in poor condition, if any cattle wander off, you can claim them by the brand. It\u2019s going to be a bit more difficult because most of your cattle are full grown, but we talked about how to do that. Now, do you have a branding iron?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, Adam, you\u2019re going to think I\u2019m so foolish, but I never thought about that.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s all right. There\u2019s a small forge behind the stable, and I\u2019ll see if I can scrounge up some metal to use. There should be some pieces that will work. How about a double R brand? I could put an R back to back with another R.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat sounds wonderful, but that work won\u2019t hurt your back, will it? I don\u2019t want you to hurt yourself.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll be fine, and if I get a bit sore, I seem to remember a magic cure and that the lady of this ranch is quite good with that method.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re terrible.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOn a more serious note, no regrets about yesterday?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNone. You?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh no, I felt great. I think I\u2019m still feeling the pleasant aftereffects. I thought you would be all right with it. With your past, you would be able to make that decision.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMy past?\u201d Suddenly Rose was worried, but Adam\u2019s answer let her relax.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, you were married. You would know more about these things than most women. If you didn\u2019t want the attention, you would have let me know, or at least I hope you would have.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, you\u2019re right. I knew what I was getting into just by kissing you. It\u2019s all good, and I would like to spend more time with you. I really do enjoy every minute when we\u2019re together.\u201d As she said it, she realized she was telling the truth. She had never enjoyed being with a man the way she enjoyed being with Adam and that was only after a few days. She started to worry that she might fall in love with him. She had never loved a man, never consented to marriage, and found that most men appreciated her only when they found how much of a benefit it was to know her. Here was a man who cared about how she felt and worried about that. She had no experience with such a man and had only meant to have a good time with him.<\/p>\n

As the morning progressed, she realized that she would stay if he asked her. She would change her life for him and that made her wonder if that was what being in love meant. She had a lot to think about, but thinking was the last thing she was doing when she went to bring some lemonade to Adam. He had been working at the forge for quite a while. She could hear the metal on metal sounds as she worked in the kitchen. When she walked around the corner of the stable and saw him with his shirt off and sweat making his body glisten in the sun, her heart began racing and her breathing became shallow. She watched him work and slowly regained control. When she walked up to give him a drink of lemonade, he grinned at her and thanked her. That\u2019s when she knew she was in love. She knew he wasn\u2019t, but in time, perhaps he could love her too. She was amazed at the work he had done. Not only had he created a branding iron but had found enough metal to create a new latch for the corral gate. The one on it was wood but this one was a work of art.<\/p>\n

After lunch, Adam said that he needed to go for he had some work on the Ponderosa that he needed to do, and he wouldn\u2019t have time that evening to complete it. Then the next day, he had to go to town to deliver the paperwork. He wouldn\u2019t be able to see her the next day, and both found that difficult to accept. Adam pulled her into his arms for a kiss to let her know he would miss her. They didn\u2019t do anything more because the hands were back from rounding up cattle, and neither of them wanted to be too obvious. Adam bid her goodbye, and Rose felt a bit lonely as soon as she saw him disappear from view as he drove his carriage back to the Ponderosa.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 5<\/strong><\/p>\n

As Adam prepared the paperwork he needed to take to town the following day, Ben watched and asked a few questions. Ben had been acting as foreman while Adam was laid up and Hoss and Joe were on the posse. He realized as he watched Adam work that he was looking forward to being back in his old role. For the time being though, he meant to be the caring and concerned father.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou seem very happy these last few days. Does Mrs. Reynolds have something to do with that?\u201d<\/p>\n

Looking up with a wry smile, Adam rubbed his earlobe between his thumb and index finger before answering. Ben knew what it meant. He was taking some time to prepare his answer, but he wasn\u2019t worried about it. Adam liked to be careful in how he phrased things.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe is. If I hadn\u2019t had the chance to go over there to help her out, I would have been stuck in the house, and it would have driven me crazy.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat is she like?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShe\u2019s spirited and independent but with an air of mystery about her. I get the feeling it would be difficult to know what Rose is thinking unless she tells you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRose?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, Pa, we have been working side-by-side for a couple of days. It\u2019s difficult to stay formal in such a situation.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI get the feeling it\u2019s gone well beyond being formal.\u201d Adam\u2019s look confirmed that thought. \u201cAfter everything that\u2019s happened, you\u2019re not moving too fast in this situation, are you? I mean, we hardly know anything about her.\u201d<\/p>\n

Leaning back in the chair, Adam crossed his arms. Ben knew what that meant too. \u201cI\u2019ve tried being thoughtful and working at solutions. Lately none of that has worked out. Maybe I ought to just go with my feelings for a change.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, you did your best in those situations. No one could have done any better. It\u2019s not your fault that people are not honest. You can\u2019t hold yourself responsible for what others do.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut I do hold myself responsible for what I do, and I have made a number of errors in judgment, and I have failed to be careful enough as well. People have died because of my actions or inaction. Sometimes I didn\u2019t foresee the consequences of my actions. I can\u2019t forget any of that. I thought I was doing a simple little thing when I had the bright idea to research Nevada\u2019s history. It wasn\u2019t so simple. Men died including an innocent man, the last of his tribe.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAre you being careful enough now?\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam wanted to say that he was, but he knew he wasn\u2019t. He had gotten deeply involved with a woman although he knew very little about her. She didn\u2019t talk about anything from her past other than in the most general terms. He didn\u2019t even know where she was from or if she had any family. He had ignored his gut feeling that something wasn\u2019t quite right with her story, and he had let himself be seduced for the more he thought about it, the more he knew she had led him to her bed as surely as if she had come right out and asked. Ben was patient. He knew that with Adam there was no point in trying to push or rush. Finally Adam looked at him directly.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou may be right. I need some time to think about all of this. I won\u2019t be seeing her tomorrow as I have to be in town for quite a bit. I\u2019ll have lots of time to think on the trip to town and back again.\u201d<\/p>\n

Knowing that it was time to drop that topic, Ben moved on to his other big concern. \u201cI hope your brothers are back soon. I\u2019m worried about them being gone this long. It can\u2019t be going well.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re worried?\u201d At Ben\u2019s nod, Adam explained what he thought might have happened. \u201cIf they got ahead of them, they would have had to wait for them. If they were already through the area, then they would have to track them. Hoss is exceptional as a tracker, but there\u2019s a lot that can be done to slow the tracking. As smart as this gang has been in the past, I would guess they would have used some tricks. If they had fresh horses, they could be way ahead of the posses who would have to track them down.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s true. I just worry so much when any of you boys are on a posse until I see you riding back home.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, we\u2019re not boys any more. We\u2019re men, and we know how to be careful.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019ll always be my boys. I can\u2019t help it. It\u2019s a father\u2019s right.\u201d<\/p>\n

Nodding, Adam gathered up all the paperwork and put it in a leather satchel. He had a lot of work to do in town, but it felt good to be accomplishing something. It felt a heck of a lot better than riding fence lines or branding cattle. As he lay in bed that night, he thought about his brothers and what they might be doing, and then he couldn\u2019t help but think about Rose and what she might be doing. He reflected too on his thoughts earlier. He wasn\u2019t satisfied being a cowhand. He wanted more but had no clear idea of what that more was. He fell asleep finally but slept fitfully worried about so many things. He dreamed he was on a cliff, it was raining, and he was sliding forward unable to stop himself. He woke to a light rain hitting the window. Sitting up, he wiped the sweat from his brow and realized he was damp from sweating, still tired, and still ill at ease. He needed to get that work done in town, and spend some time thinking about the questions he wanted to ask Rose. He needed answers from her so he could know if she was going to be part of his future.<\/p>\n

While Adam searched for answers within himself, the posse was getting up to a light rain and knew they needed to move quickly or lose all hope of tracking the gang. They skipped breakfast, packed up their gear, and headed out as soon as there was light. They found the trail and followed it despite the rain. It circled around the Ponderosa boundary several times before moving further south. They lost the trail on the Reynolds ranch. Hoss suggested they might stop there to ask if anyone on the ranch had seen anything unusual so the posse headed there next.<\/p>\n

Hearing horses riding in and then seeing such a large group of men outside her house, Rose started breathing hard scared that all her plans had somehow failed. She did her best to regain her composure and was reasonable calm when she answered the knock on her front door. Sheriff Roy Coffee and Hoss stood on her porch with two other men wearing badges.<\/p>\n

\u201cMa\u2019am, I\u2019m Sheriff Coffee out of Virginia City, and we shur hate to bother ya, but we\u2019ve been out tracking a murderous band of robbers. We lost their trail on your ranch. We was wondering if you or any of your hands has seen anything unusual or any strangers riding through?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSheriff, I\u2019m sorry but I\u2019m new here as are my hands. I\u2019m not sure any of us would recognize anything as strange or realize that any men riding through were strangers. If we saw four men, we would likely think that they could be our neighbors or any other innocent men. We wouldn\u2019t have any idea which.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, that\u2019s what Hoss said, but I was hoping for a break. We can\u2019t seem to get one with this gang. I\u2019m sorry to have bothered you. We\u2019ll be letting you get on with your work.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThank you, Sheriff Coffee. I\u2019m just about to feed my hands. If you wanted to wait a bit, I could try cooking up some lunch for your men.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNah, that\u2019s all right, ma\u2019am. I\u2019m sure that they all want to head on home now that we lost the trail. Good day to you.\u201d<\/p>\n

As the four men walked back to their horses, the rain diminished. It looked like it would clear out soon. Roy noted how thoughtful Hoss looked. \u201cSomething on your mind, Hoss?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRoy, I ain\u2019t got nothing to go on, but I had the feeling she was real nervous about talking with us.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDo you think she was lying?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRoy, I can\u2019t say that, but it just didn\u2019t ring true.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, I had the same feeling, but like you say, I ain\u2019t got nothing to base it on except my feeling that something ain\u2019t quite right here. You come up with anything solid, you let me know.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll do that, Roy. I will.\u201d<\/p>\n

Roscoe had been at the kitchen door waiting to take breakfast to the other men. He had moved to the side of the house so he could hear them talking with Rose. Then he stayed there as they walked down the porch steps and was rewarded with hearing Hoss and Roy talking. When the posse rode out, Roscoe went back to the kitchen door and entered the house. \u201cWe got trouble.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat kind of trouble?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat big man and the sheriff didn\u2019t like your answer. They think you were lying. I get the feeling they\u2019ll be nosing around some in our business.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThey can nose around all they like now. You\u2019re safely here and they lost the trail. All the money is being transferred into the Virginia City Branch of the Bank of California. Soon, we can start withdrawing that money. We\u2019re all going to be pretty well off.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t want to be the richest man sitting in jail waiting for the gallows. We gotta do something about this. You\u2019re the planner, plan! You spent enough time entertaining that Cartwright. You need to get back to what we do.\u201d<\/p>\n

Bristling at his remarks, Rose had a retort. \u201cYou were the ones who let them follow your trail. They should never have found your tracks leading to this ranch. I can plan, but you have to follow the plan.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe followed your plan exactly. There were no mistakes. Somebody in that group is the best tracker we ever faced. Keep that in mind when you\u2019re planning how to get us out of here.\u201d<\/p>\n

As Roscoe grabbed the platter of eggs, toast, and ham, Rose was thinking about what Adam had said about Hoss and his tracking skills. It was a new variable that she had to plug into the equation when she was planning what they would do next. After Roscoe left the house, Rose pulled out some sheets of paper, a pen, and an inkwell. She anticipated that Adam might have a lot of questions after he talked with Hoss. She began to write a life story, some of it real and some of it fiction with enough details that could be checked so that Adam would get answers to questions whether he asked her or sought out the information elsewhere. There had been a Reynolds ranch in Texas. She remembered it from the brief time she had been there. Almost all of the family had been wiped out in a raid by Comanches. While living in California, Rose had met a Reynolds woman. She and her father had left Texas as war loomed to seek a better life in California, but the father had died in the gold fields, and the woman had died in a typhoid epidemic. Rose and her gang had fled that area to avoid the contagion, and now she could use that information. There was no one alive who could dispute that she was part of that family. She added anecdotes and stories to her outline as she wrote. By the end of the morning, she had a nice thick sheaf of papers detailing her imaginary life as well as a plausible story of how she had acquired her money. She planned to spend the afternoon and evening reading and rereading until that story was hers. Then she began to think about how she could rid herself of her gang and especially how she could get rid of Clint who she saw as a millstone now. It was an encumbrance she intended to remove. She wanted to find out if there was a long term relationship with Adam in her future, but she decided that after knowing Adam, she should never have settled for a man like Clint.<\/p>\n

While Rose was writing and Adam was conducting his business in town, Hoss and Joe rode home to be greeted with a huge smile by their father who was greatly relieved to see them home. After taking care of their horses and dropping their dirty and wet clothing in the wash room, Hoss and Joe emerged to find that Hop Sing had laid out a scrumptious lunch for them.<\/p>\n

\u201cHot diggity, Joe, I\u2019m gonna go on more posses ifn I can come home to this. Hop Sing, you\u2019re the best there ever was.\u201d Hoss sat down and loaded up a plate with all the wonderful food on heavily laden platters on the table.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, big brother, with all this food, we won\u2019t need dinner today.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHush, now, Joe, don\u2019t you go talking all silly like that. Hop Sing would be right hurt ifn we didn\u2019t want him to cook dinner. I say, let him cook.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou would. I suppose you do have two and a half days of trail food to make up for. Hey, where\u2019s Adam? We were just over at the Reynolds Ranch, and he wasn\u2019t there.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam is taking care of legal matters in town. He had appointments with our lawyer, our broker, and at the bank. I expect him to be home late this afternoon.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t understand how he likes doing that kind of stuff. But he does seem a lot happier than he was lately.\u201d Hoss was concerned about Adam, but did like the improvement in his mood. His look turned serious though when he considered Mrs. Reynolds. Ben saw the look and waited for whatever it was that was bothering Hoss. \u201cPa, what do you think of that Mrs. Reynolds?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI think we\u2019ve discussed that already. I don\u2019t know much about her so it\u2019s difficult to form an opinion.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, I think that too, but today we stopped by there because we lost that gang\u2019s tracks on her ranch. Pa, Roy and me felt like she wasn\u2019t telling us the truth. We got nothing to go on but a feeling, but it just don\u2019t sit right with me that we lost the gang\u2019s tracks there, and she said there was nothing unusual. I mean, I know she\u2019s new here and all, but she didn\u2019t mention seeing anything out of the ordinary. You would think she would have at least asked us what we were looking for.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, what did she say?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, Pa, she said if she saw four men riding through, she would likely think they were neighbors or just innocent men passing by.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, that does make sense to me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know, and it makes sense to me too, but I had the strangest feeling that she was lying when she said it. I\u2019m sorry, but it was just a gut feeling.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, that was probably your stomach telling you to get home to this fabulous spread.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, I\u2019m being serious here. I don\u2019t need you riling me up now.\u201d<\/p>\n

The three men were quiet for a while then as they ate. Suddenly Joe slapped the table with his hand. \u201cThat\u2019s it!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s it, and don\u2019t yell when you\u2019re at the table.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Pa, Hoss, don\u2019t you see. She said if she saw four men riding by they could be neighbors or innocent men just passing through.\u201d Ben was the first to understand what Joe meant. He looked at Hoss who shook his head when he got it too.<\/p>\n

\u201cDadburnit, I knew there was something wrong. How did she know we was trailing four men?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben had a caution. \u201cNow, that doesn\u2019t prove anything, but it certainly is something that bears some study. But, don\u2019t say anything to Adam. He likes this woman, and I don\u2019t want to hurt him needlessly.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut Pa, what if it\u2019s true? It\u2019s gonna hurt him real bad to find out she lied about anything.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, you\u2019re right, but for now, let\u2019s just think about how to handle this without saying anything to Adam.\u201d<\/p>\n

Late that afternoon when Adam arrived home, Hoss went out to take care of the carriage for him even though he told Hoss he was feeling much better and could do it himself. As Hoss insisted, Adam went inside to discuss the results of his meeting. He talked with his father for at least an hour, and noted that he seemed ill at ease. Joe seemed even more uncomfortable and Hoss sat and stared at the fire until dinner was announced. Adam thought that perhaps the failed mission of the posse was the cause so he didn\u2019t tease his brothers about that at all. That night, all four of them had trouble falling asleep, but only Adam had positive thoughts. He was looking forward to seeing Rose the next day, and the anticipation had him finding slumber difficult to achieve. Finally he did fall asleep, but his father and brothers found sleep much more difficult.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 6<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cYou look like the cat that caught the bird.\u201d Rose had been waiting anxiously that morning to see if Adam would come to see her again.<\/p>\n

\u201cI thought that perhaps I could talk you into a picnic today. I\u2019ve caught up on my work, and my brothers are home to handle anything that should come up. As soon as I can ride again, I won\u2019t have much free time so I thought to take advantage of these last free days I have.\u201d Adam grinned and Rose could only nod in agreement.<\/p>\n

\u201cJust a moment and I\u2019ll get my shawl. I\u2019ll be right with you.\u201d Rose picked up her shawl and quickly glanced through her notes. Sure that she had committed everything to memory, she smiled and headed out to go on a picnic. She smiled more as she thought to herself how much she trusted Adam without knowing much about him. She could only hope that he trusted her the same way. She had the first parts of a plan in mind to free herself of her former life so that she would be able to spend more time with the handsome and courteous rancher and lover. Adam helped her into the carriage and then climbed in beside her.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhere are you taking me for this picnic?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOn to the Ponderosa. There are some wonderful places for picnics. I thought perhaps one by a sand beach at the lake would be nice. We could walk barefoot in the water later if you wish.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat sounds so lovely. Thank you so much for the invitation.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI missed you yesterday. I spent quite a lot of time thinking about you. I had to fight to keep my mind on business when I was in the meetings I had yesterday.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThe meetings were successful then?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, the Ponderosa cash flow should be quite healthy this year. We\u2019ve got confirmed contracts for cattle, horses, timber, and lumber. I added a few investments too that should pay off nicely by next year. The taxes are paid for this year, so everything coming in is profit once expenses are paid.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHow much do you pay in taxes on a large ranch like yours?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI paid ten thousand dollars in Genoa a few months ago. Luckily, I was able to get it done. Otherwise we could have had a problem with unpaid taxes. Some properties have been sold for pennies on the dollar the last few years when that happened. I\u2019ve been telling Pa that we need to separate the Ponderosa into different business entities so that one setback doesn\u2019t threaten all of our holdings. He\u2019s reluctant to make any changes like that though.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy did you say you were lucky to get the taxes paid?\u201d<\/p>\n

So Adam told her about Trask and his mistake in telling the miner that he was carrying that amount in his saddle pocket. He told her the miner was killed, and that he had almost been lynched. She was thinking that he was a very intelligent and resourceful man to survive such an encounter so she was surprised at the bitterness he expressed. \u201cI don\u2019t understand. It all worked out. That awful man went to prison, Mr. Neighbors got respect, and you got to go pay the taxes.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat old miner died.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat could not be your fault. Trask would have killed him regardless of what you told him. Trask wasn\u2019t going to leave any witnesses.\u201d Adam looked at Rose with some intensity making her a bit nervous. This man had the ability to unnerve like no other. \u201cDid I say something wrong?\u201d<\/p>\n

After a moment, Adam looked away and focused on the carriage horse and the reins in his hands. \u201cNo, it\u2019s just that wasn\u2019t the reaction I expected from a woman. You surprise me, that\u2019s all.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy does that surprise you?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMost women, it seems to me, would have been more concerned that an innocent man died than that my trip was successful and that there were other benefits at the cost of a man\u2019s life.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI guess in my life, being successful has been more important than who got hurt along the way. We all have to survive out here, and sometimes people get hurt or even killed. It\u2019s the way it is, as far as I can see.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s a hard way to live. I keep hoping for more.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s always more. You only have to grab on and take it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Smiling and moving the conversation to lighter matters, Adam mentioned that she had done something just like that a couple of days earlier. She laughed and leaned her head against his shoulder as she wrapped an arm around his arm. But Adam was thinking that he had seen part of her soul that she liked to keep hidden. She was a mystery in so many ways, and he certainly enjoyed a mystery, but he was beginning to think this one might have some traps in it of which he ought to beware. He was glad too that he had followed the lawyer\u2019s advice and sent out a few inquiries about the widow Rose Reynolds. Sometimes it could be exciting to play with fire, but it was best to take precautions too. There were simply too many questions for him to let his guard down too much. But her warmth against his side and the beauty of the day distracted him from more negative thoughts. At the lake, he pulled out a blanket, a picnic basket, and two towels. He spread the blanket out in some shade although they would have to move it as the day progressed.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat would you like to do first?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou did mention walking in the water. I haven\u2019t done that since I was a little girl. I\u2019d like to do that first.\u201d<\/p>\n

Pulling off his boots, Adam watched as Rose slipped off her soft leather boots, and then reached up her skirt to slide her stockings off. Adam admired the soft skin of her ankles and legs. She noticed him watching intently and moved slowly to give him the best show. When she finished and stood, Adam was by her side and wrapped his arms around her to kiss her.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe could go swimming if you like. Have you ever been swimming?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNever.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWould you like to try?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t have anything to wear for swimming.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019re on the Ponderosa. You don\u2019t need to wear anything.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know how to swim.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll be by your side the whole time.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIsn\u2019t the water rather cool?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSwimming will make the water feel refreshing after.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAfter what?\u201d<\/p>\n

Without answering, Adam let her know by beginning to unbutton her dress as he trailed kisses from her lips to cheek to neck. She ran her hands up his chest and pulled him into another passionate kiss as he continued to undress her and himself. An hour later, he walked her into the water, and it was as refreshing as he had said it would be. He never left her side. When they left the water though, Rose was a bit chilled. Adam dried her with the towel rubbing vigorously on her arms and legs before helping her dress. He dressed then as she watched. Rose was not at all shy.<\/p>\n

\u201cI like all the muscles you have. The hard work out here agrees with you. But would you turn around so I can see your back?\u201d<\/p>\n

As he did, she could see that the bruising was all shades of brown and green. He was obviously healing well. He looked back over his shoulder at her. \u201cIt feels a lot better.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt seems to be healing very well. You should be able to ride very soon.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know, and that means I won\u2019t be able to see as much of you. My brothers will be delivering some horses to the Army so I\u2019ll have to do a lot more on the ranch soon. It\u2019s why I wanted a picnic today.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSpeaking of which, I\u2019m hungry. What did you bring along?\u201d<\/p>\n

So Adam unpacked the basket discovering what Hop Sing had packed for their lunch. After that they skipped stones and took a walk. By mid-afternoon, Adam knew it was time to pack up. Rose helped him with the basket, and he tossed the towels in it as well. After shaking out the blanket, he packed that and the basket into the back of the carriage. He took a long route back to Rose\u2019s ranch so that he could show her more of the sights of the Ponderosa. He bid her goodbye with a long and tender kiss promising to be back as soon as he could but warning her that it could be a week or more.<\/p>\n

By the time Adam returned home, Hoss and Joe were back from working. \u201cAbout time you\u2019re back. I hope you enjoyed having another day off.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThank you, Joe. I touched that you are so concerned with my well being.\u201d<\/p>\n

Remembering that their father had encouraged them to be wary of upsetting Adam especially now that he seemed to be coming out of his sad state, Joe simply walked to the house to vent his frustration. Hoss was more relaxed about the whole thing.<\/p>\n

\u201cYour back feeling better?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, I think I ought to try riding tomorrow. I could hardly feel it today, so it should be all right.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHave yourself a good day with Mrs. Reynolds?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, I enjoy being with her.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShe have anything to say about us being on her property when we was looking for that gang?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, the topic never came up.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo she still hasn\u2019t anything unusual to report?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, nothing as far as I know.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou seen these men she\u2019s got working for her? You said there were four of them, right?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRight, but Hoss, what is this interrogation about? You may as well just spit it out because you know I won\u2019t quit until you tell me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know. You\u2019re like a dog with a bone gnawing and scratching at it until he breaks it open and gets the marrow.\u201d Hoss could see that his delaying tactics would have no effect on his older brother who simply waited expectantly for the answer to his question. \u201cWell, when we talked to her yesterday, she didn\u2019t seem like she was being honest with us. It was just a gut feeling, but Roy had the same feeling. Then we remembered that she said she hadn\u2019t seen four men traveling through her property only we had never said we was looking for four men, so how\u2019s she know that?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo, what do you think? That she\u2019s the head of some outlaw gang that\u2019s been robbing and murdering all over California and now in Reno?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, it does sound kinda silly when you say it like that, but, dadburnit, Adam, why did she say four when we never asked her that?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPerhaps she reads the newspapers which have been writing about four men pulling off these robberies for the past year.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, that could explain that, but it still don\u2019t set right with me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe I should invite her to dinner, and then you could get to know her and see what you think?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou getting serious about her?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSerious, yes. I like her, and I like spending time with her. Am I falling in love with her? No. I\u2019m not ready to fall in love with anyone right now.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSeems to me that we ain\u2019t always got control of how our feelings develop for a woman.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou may be right about that. Hoss, I\u2019ll be careful. I\u2019ll keep my eyes wide open.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou ain\u2019t mad about what I was thinking and what I said to you?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI never could get mad about you caring what happens to me. I know you only said those things because you care. Now let\u2019s get inside so we\u2019re not late to dinner. I\u2019m hungry. I worked up quite an appetite today.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI bet you did.\u201d Hoss laughed and slapped Adam on the shoulder. All Adam could do was look down a bit sheepishly and smile. That made Hoss laugh, and Adam had to join him. Ben relaxed as he heard his two older sons walking into the house chuckling yet over what Adam had revealed.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat was so funny?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, you know, Pa, Adam and me was just joshing each other. Now, what\u2019s Hop Sing got for dinner? I\u2019m gonna be gone for a week, and I need a right big meal to tide me over until I get home.\u201d<\/p>\n

That made the others laugh too, and they sat down to dinner to plan the work for the next week. Hoss and Joe updated Adam on what they had been doing and what still needed to be done. Adam updated their father on the status of the contracts and investments. Adam made a pitch again for organizing the Ponderosa as several entities legally to limit their liability, but Ben still didn\u2019t want to do it because it didn\u2019t seem necessary to him. It was a minor bump in the conversation that was mostly genial and warm.<\/p>\n

On the Reynolds Ranch, the conversation was anything but warm and genial. Rose and Roscoe were discussing her plans for disbanding the gang. Roscoe was at least hearing her out.<\/p>\n

\u201cRoscoe, you knew when we started that this could not go on forever. Now I have a lot of money invested as we agreed when we started this. I can sign those over to each of you, and you\u2019ll all be reasonably wealthy men. Sooner or later, we\u2019re going to make a critical mistake. We could already have made one, and I\u2019m sure by now that Wells Fargo has upped the reward on us. Add it to all the other rewards out there, and bounty hunters are already probably trying to figure out where we went.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s pretty nice here, and you seem to enjoy what the area has to offer. Can\u2019t we just hang out here for the next six months or so until things cool down? Maybe we could relocate to another state and work out of a setup like this one?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t want to move.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re falling in love with that Cartwright, aren\u2019t you? Well let me tell you what I\u2019ve found out about him. I was talking with a few of the Ponderosa hands while we was out fixing up the worst of the fence lines. I mentioned that I had seen one of the Cartwrights hanging out with my boss. They told me all about him. He\u2019s real smart, and he already put a friend or two of his in jail. He don\u2019t tolerate no one going against the law, but he ain\u2019t above taking the law into his own hands. He\u2019s pretty damn good with a gun too from what I\u2019ve heard. He\u2019s cool and calm in a fight. He shot it out with a professional gunfighter once and won. You\u2019re playing with dynamite with that one.\u201d<\/p>\n

Rose carefully considered all that Roscoe had said. She liked the idea that he was smart and dangerous. She also knew that he was loving and passionate. It all went with the package that she liked so much. Now in addition to falling in love with him, her respect and admiration for him increased too. Roscoe could see that his words had the opposite effect of what he wanted. Knowing Rose as he did, he should have known better. Adam was a lot like Clint except he wasn\u2019t mean and nasty. Rose seemed attracted to the type. Roscoe shook his head and said he was going to talk with the men to see what they thought about Rose\u2019s ideas. Rose sat in her chair for the next hour thinking. She now had a few more ideas for her plan to extricate herself from the gang and her criminal past. She now knew how Adam could help her with that. It was nearly two weeks before she saw him again so she had a lot of time to convince Roscoe and the men as well as fine tune her plan.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 7<\/strong><\/p>\n

Rose was hanging laundry when she sensed a presence behind her. She whirled and then shook her head. Adam was standing there grinning. \u201cYou sneak better than anyone I have ever known.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, thinks I\u2019m part Paiute.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI grew up around here and the only boys close by to play with were Paiute most of the time. I learned a lot from them. Now how about a kiss to let me know how much you missed me?\u201d<\/p>\n

Rose stepped into his embrace and wrapped her arms around his neck as he leaned down to kiss her. They stood there for a time enjoying being in each other\u2019s arms.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt seems kinda quiet around here.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI sent the men to sell the cattle. I\u2019m not cut out to be a cattle rancher. I had an offer from a ranch east of Carson. They\u2019ll buy my cattle, and they\u2019ll sell me some horses for breeding stock. Raising horses is more what I\u2019m suited to, I think. I can train them for any kind of work. With just me, I don\u2019t need a lot of income. Selling a few horses a year will be enough. If I do better than that, well all the better.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut there\u2019s a lot of upkeep on a place even if all you\u2019re doing is raising horses.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRoscoe is going to stay. The men have all the fences in good shape, and we won\u2019t need much pasture anyway. Roscoe will build a few more corrals for me, and we need to add some stalls in the stable.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou seem to have thought this through rather well.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m good at planning and organizing. I thought I ought to take advantage of my strengths instead of trying to do something too different. The idea of being a rancher was a lot easier than actually being a rancher. I had no idea how much work it would be.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut you know how much work it is to raise horses?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, we raised a lot of horses on our ranch in Texas, and we did a bit of that in California before my father caught the gold fever and died in one of those mining camps.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat of the rest of your family?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThere was only my father and me. The rest of my family died in Texas. We left when there was no one left but the two of us. Father gathered up the best horses, and we headed to California. We left everything else behind including the graves of the rest of the family although it\u2019s not much of a grave when all you can do is put a marker by your burned down house knowing your family is in those ashes.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat happened?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThere was a Comanche raid. Some of their women had been taken and badly used by some men. We had nothing to do with it, but I guess they look at us the way a lot of white look at them. They\u2019re all alike. My family was white so they had to die. I hid in the fruit cellar, and Papa was away when it happened. I heard terrible screams but I was always told if there was trouble, to stay in the fruit cellar and not make a sound. I was still hiding there when Papa got back after he saw the smoke rising. It was too late. It was all over by then, and there was nothing he could do. I guess I was trying to recreate it here, but it\u2019s gone, and I can\u2019t do anything about it. The Reynolds Ranch was no more.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cReynolds? I thought that was your late husband\u2019s name.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI went back to my family name after my husband was killed. His name was Reed, and he was hanged. Some thought he had been involved in cattle rustling. It was only later that they realized it was a mistaken identification when they caught the men who had really done it. There was too much notoriety with the name. I went back to my family name. I suppose you need to know that. If you want to spend any more time with me, you deserve to know the whole story.\u201d<\/p>\n

Pulling Rose back into his embrace, Adam consoled her but was also thinking. Her story did match up well with what he had been able to find out. His father had brought home letters and telegrams when he made trips to town over the past two weeks, but he now knew what Hoss meant about how she told a story. Something didn\u2019t feel right about it, and like Hoss, he couldn\u2019t quite figure out what that was. He had a few more telegrams to send. He didn\u2019t like not trusting her, but his failure to be careful had led to some big problems for him in the past year or so, and he didn\u2019t want to let that happen again.<\/p>\n

\u201cHow about coming inside for a cool drink? I made lemonade this morning.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat sounds wonderful. I\u2019ve been working so hard, I\u2019ve hardly had time to have a cool drink of anything.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI thought I might see you on Sunday, but none of you were at church services.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI thought I would be able to see you too, but we had some trouble up at the timber camps so I had to ride up there. I got back yesterday and had a lot of work to catch up on. As soon as I finished up this morning, I took a bath and headed over here hoping you would be home and not too busy. I\u2019m free for the rest of the day.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHandsome, I\u2019m never too busy for you. I\u2019m glad you took a bath too.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, why is that?\u201d Except Adam was grinning because he had a fair idea why she liked that he had bathed. \u201cI like to take baths except I hadn\u2019t had a chance for a week. There\u2019s a dance in town tonight too if you were by chance interested in going with me?<\/p>\n

\u201cLet\u2019s talk about the dance inside over lemonade and cookies.<\/p>\n

Once in the house, Rose did pour glasses of lemonade for them and they took them to her parlor to relax and talk. Adam sat beside her on her settee. She leaned into him as they talked.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019ve made a lot of changes in your life in the past year.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, but some were forced on me. I couldn\u2019t stay where I was after my husband was killed. I left there after selling everything. I used that money to buy this place, and I transferred all of our investments here too so I never have to go back to California again.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou wouldn\u2019t consider taking a trip with me to Sacramento or San Francisco?\u201d<\/p>\n

Rose was nervous about Sacramento especially and she would have to travel through that city if they were going to San Francisco. \u201cNo, I\u2019m sorry. It would be too difficult.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI have to go to those cities frequently on business. I had thought perhaps you would like to go with me so we could enjoy the theatre together. They have a number of fine restaurants too.\u201d<\/p>\n

Rose was getting exceptionally nervous then. People in those places knew her as Violet Reinhart. Now there weren\u2019t that many who knew her, but her plans could come crashing down around her if even one person called her Violet or Vi when she was with Adam. She had thought that moving to such a small city in Nevada would remove that threat but now knew how naive she had been about that. Adam noted her nervousness and assumed it was because of her past or the story of her past that she had told him.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry. I didn\u2019t mean to upset you. I only wanted to see if you were interested in some of the same things I like.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s Piper\u2019s in town. That will be good enough for me, or I would go with you to Carson City, but I don\u2019t want to ever set foot in California again.\u201d<\/p>\n

Rose was being real with that statement. It wasn\u2019t in her notes, but she felt strongly about it. Those emotional undertones came through very clearly. Knowing he had upset her, Adam tried to steer the conversation back to the two of them and the dance in town. Rose went to get refills on their lemonade without giving him a final answer though. She needed time to think. Finally she decided that the best strategy was to go with him to the dance so she agreed to his request. Adam grinned and pulled her to him for a kiss when she said she would go to the dance with him, and almost inevitably, they ended up in her bed.<\/p>\n

\u201cI do enjoy how you make love to a woman, Adam. You make me feel like I\u2019m the luckiest woman alive. You seem different than most men. You care about how I feel.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRespect, trust, and consideration are important in any relationship. If you don\u2019t have those, nothing else can happen.\u201d<\/p>\n

Rose rested in his embrace then with her head on his chest and his arm around her holding her close. \u201cAdam, I don\u2019t have any fancy dresses. Will my Sunday dress be good enough?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRose, it\u2019s a barn dance. Your everyday dress would be good enough. I\u2019m wearing what I wore over here. It\u2019s not a formal dance. There will be square dancing and reels. I\u2019m hoping there will be a few waltzes but you never know at one of these. If it was the dance at the dance hall, there would be a more formal atmosphere, but even then, a nice dress is all that\u2019s required.\u201d<\/p>\n

They shared an early light dinner, and then Adam went to hitch up her carriage as she dressed for the dance. As they drove to town, they talked about her plans for raising horses, and Adam had to admit that she did seem to know what was needed for that. He asked if she had enough harness and saddles. She didn\u2019t so he told her he would introduce her to the man in town who would supply those for her at a fair price. She liked that he didn\u2019t try to talk her out of her plan, but she also worried that might be because he had no intention of getting too involved with her so it didn\u2019t matter that much what she planned to do. She knew that there were many men who wouldn\u2019t mind marrying her. She knew she was pretty. She also was financially well off and that would interest many men, but she wanted Adam. She had already changed her life to accommodate that desire. As they chatted, she was thinking about how she could pull him closer to her. She did entertain the idea that she might bear his child. She knew that a man like Adam would marry her if she was with child. However, they had only had relations a few times. She had been with Clint for a year, and never was heavy with child. She had to wonder if that was even a possibility for her.<\/p>\n

When they arrived in town, Hoss and Joe were already there and called out to them. Adam helped Rose from the carriage, and introduced her formally to his brothers. Rose remembered Hoss especially from talking with him at church briefly a few times and from the day he stood on her porch and asked about the gang the posse had been trailing. Joe took her hand and kissed the back of it like some southern gentleman, and she had to smile at the effort he made to be suave and sophisticated. It didn\u2019t suit him, but the darling smile was enough to offset that.<\/p>\n

As Rose walked in with Adam, she noted a number of looks directed her way which could have killed if the daggers had been real instead of imaginary. Many of the ladies had heard that Adam was spending time with the Widow Reynolds, but to see it confirmed was maddening to some. There were many in town who had set their sights on him, and all were irritated that he was interested in someone who had only recently moved into the area. That he danced exclusively with her all night only added to the ill feeling. Rose was going to find a number of cold shoulders if she attempted to make any female friends in town. She found that out at church services the next morning. Several times women talked loudly enough for her to hear especially when one of the Cartwrights was not close.<\/p>\n

\u201cI never saw her in mourning clothes.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s only been dead a year, I heard.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThey left the dance very late last night.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI saw them leave. She had her arm in his, and he was driving her carriage. I wonder if he ever went home last night.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShe\u2019s from California, and some of those women out there play fast and loose with rules.\u201d \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cShe might be one of those.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMy husband says she must be one of those suffragists. She bought her own ranch and has been in the bank doing transactions and such like any man would do.\u201d<\/p>\n

By the time she was riding with Adam to the Ponderosa, she was feeling a bit down. Adam asked why so she told him. He had said he wanted her to trust him, and she did.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey\u2019re jealous. They\u2019ll get over it. Some of the people out here just can\u2019t help gossiping about the Cartwrights. You spend time with us and you become part of it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI hope your family likes me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJust be yourself. They\u2019ll like you just fine.\u201d<\/p>\n

Rose was nervous though. She had read through her notes this morning to make sure she didn\u2019t slip up. She had learned a long time before this that lies were difficult to remember. She learned to write them down so she could study and learn them so that eventually they seemed like the truth even to her. She did well with the family answering questions, and she was sure that even Adam with his superior intellect would not find any errors in her story. He didn\u2019t, but she was wrong that he had accepted everything she had told him. After driving her home and riding Sport back to the Ponderosa, he had a lot of time to think. Things were not quite right, and he was beginning to suspect he knew why. What he didn\u2019t know was why she was doing what she was doing. He needed more information. He thought that perhaps Hoss could help him with that.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 8<\/strong><\/p>\n

As often as Hoss could for the next week, he rode fence lines and worked pastures near the Reynolds Ranch. He kept track of the men as they returned with horses. He watched as three of them rode out apparently with all of their gear. He followed them to town and informed Roy as Adam had requested. Roy got a good look at all three and when one rode south and two rode east, he sent telegrams out to alert the authorities about the potential for robberies. All they could do then about their suspicions was to wait for something to happen.<\/p>\n

People were moving into the area as the mines, ranches, and timber camps were hiring. No one noticed the red haired man who seemed interested in everything that had been happening in Virginia City over the past few months. It wasn\u2019t unusual because almost all newcomers had lots of questions. This man asked some questions here and some there so he didn\u2019t attract any undue interest even if his questions seemed to focus in on the Cartwrights and the Ponderosa with quite a few questions about Adam. Roy noted the man because he rarely missed noting any newcomer, but he looked like any other cowboy in town to find work or perhaps only drifting through. Then after a day, the man was gone. That didn\u2019t cause any undue interest either even though Clem had reminded Roy that one of the gang reportedly had red hair that had been seen on occasion even though the members of the gang always wore masks, dusters, and slouch hats during their illegal activities. Roy had an answer for that.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, he don\u2019t seem to know anybody in town, and now he\u2019s gone. I can\u2019t see that helps us any. If he comes back, now that could be cause for concern.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRoy, I wish we know which way he headed when he left. We don\u2019t even know which direction he came from. I guess I\u2019m saying I\u2019d like to know more.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cClem, you can watch for him. Ifn he shows up again, we\u2019ll put somebody to watching him. Is that good enough for you?\u201d<\/p>\n

Rose, or Violet, knew exactly where the red-headed man was. She had awakened that morning to the smell of coffee. She went down the stairs to find Clint sitting at her kitchen table sipping from a cup. She knew he would come to her when he got out of jail.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo, Vi, you starting to live like you\u2019re already married to that Cartwright? Sleeping late, and not fixing breakfast for your man?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cClint, I didn\u2019t even know you were coming. I knew you were getting out, but how was I to know when you\u2019d arrive?\u201d<\/p>\n

Smiling Clint let her move to the cabinet to remove a fry pan before he vented his anger on her. He moved swiftly and grabbed her about the waist dragging her from the room and to her bedroom. She managed to get away from him there, scrambled over the bed, and stood defiantly on the other side of it facing him.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou have no right to treat me like that.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t I? We were together. I would have killed any man who came near you and you knew it. Now, I\u2019m gone and you\u2019ve got another man in your bed?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019ve had other women.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s different. It was only when you weren\u2019t around. None of them ever meant anything to me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou weren\u2019t around.\u201d<\/p>\n

Appraising her and wondering if she would say more, Clint waited. She said nothing more. \u201cRoscoe told me what\u2019s been going on. That Cartwright has been with you a lot.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOnly three times. That\u2019s not a lot.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019ve seen him more than that.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSeen him, yes, because I was lonely.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou ain\u2019t gotta be lonely now.\u201d<\/p>\n

It was her turn to appraise him and think as well as wait to see if he would say more. \u201cAll right. We can go back to the way it was, but you can\u2019t hurt him.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHurt him, nah, I ain\u2019t gonna hurt him. I\u2019m gonna kill him.\u201d<\/p>\n

She didn\u2019t let her feelings show and nodded instead. She opened her robe and dropped it to the floor. Clint grinned and began undressing. Soon, as far as he knew, it was back to the way it was except something very basic had changed. Previously, she had thought of ways to keep the hot-headed Clint safe and alive. Now as he moved over her, she was thinking of the best way to remove him from her life. She knew he had to be killed. He was mean enough that if he got caught, he would tell the authorities about her because he wouldn\u2019t want her to walk away free if he was going to the gallows. She feigned interest in his attention until he finished. Afterwards, they sat together in the kitchen and had breakfast. Clint spent most of the time talking about how he could get the men back and how there were banks all over Nevada that were ripe for the picking.<\/p>\n

\u201cOnce, we clean up around here, I\u2019m thinking Wyoming might be a good place to go. Mighty slim pickings, but we could set ourselves up with a nice place and only do jobs when we needed the money.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cClint, the men aren\u2019t coming back. We had the same men for too long. The bounty hunters and the law were going to close in on us.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, there ya go. You\u2019re the planner. Now we still got Roscoe. I know you must have ideas on how we can get some money with the three of us.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not sure yet. We should lay low here for a while until the men after us give up the chase.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSounds good. When you expecting that Cartwright again?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cClint, you really can\u2019t kill him. He\u2019s a wealthy, important man out here. The ranch would be crawling with posse members and the sheriff if you kill him.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, you always were the practical one. But you see, there\u2019s this thing. This ranch you got for us is pretty big. I\u2019m aiming to kill him and then bury him. It\u2019s not gonna be hard to cover up a grave out there. I\u2019ll bury him right in the middle of the pasture where you got that salt lick for the horses. Nobody\u2019s ever gonna think there\u2019s a grave under that. Now come here. I been locked up for a month. I missed you.\u201d<\/p>\n

For the rest of the day, she tried to think of ways to get away and warn Adam, but Clint must have suspected she might try that. He stayed by her side regardless of what she was doing. That night, he told her that Roscoe would be standing guard. \u201cI don\u2019t know what plan you had in mind, but whatever it was, you better start planning again cause you ain\u2019t gonna have that Cartwright like ya wanted.\u201d<\/p>\n

She wanted to say that it wasn\u2019t Adam getting killed that she had planned, but now that Clint was going to do that, she was furiously thinking on how to get away from him after he did. He had no idea what was going to happen once Adam was missing, but she had met his family and knew there would be a search that wouldn\u2019t stop until Adam\u2019s body was found. Clint wouldn\u2019t survive this time. She fully expected him to die for Adam\u2019s murder, and hopefully in a shootout with the posse. She wanted to be find a way to be able to claim innocence when the authorities came looking. She finally decided that she would incite him into a rage. He would bruise her badly, but he never did any permanent damage. Then she could claim that he had held her against her will and forced her to allow him to stay there. She smiled slightly as she realized how well that could work out for her. She didn\u2019t waste any time getting started on what she needed to do.<\/p>\n

\u201cAt least Adam is a real man. He was ten times better in bed than you, and a lot easier to look at too.\u201d Clint slapped her then drawing blood from a split lip, but she wasn\u2019t done. \u201cHe never had to hit me either. He just asked, and I did whatever he wanted. He\u2019s that much of a man.\u201d Clint was enraged then and threw her against the wall grabbing her throat in his hands. Her head throbbed where it had hit the wall, and she was sure she would have bruises on her back.<\/p>\n

\u201cI could snap your neck like a twig, but I won\u2019t. I\u2019m gonna come back here tomorrow and wipe his blood on your face.\u201d She grabbed at his wrists then, and he released the choke hold only to grab her wrists and force her to turn around. He punched her in the back several times until she dropped to her knees. The final insult was a kick before he stripped off his boots as well as his pants and shirt before slipping into the bed. He motioned for her to join him. She did and he pulled her close so he could tell if she left. In the morning, he pulled her to him and did what he always did when she was beside him in bed. She heard him snoring later before she thought it was safe to go to the kitchen for some towels and to put cold compresses on the worst of her injuries, but Clint opened his eyes as soon as she moved. He was apologetic as he always was after he hit her, but he did blame her for instigating their dispute. After breakfast, Clint rode off toward the Ponderosa boundary. Roscoe came to sit in the kitchen with her.<\/p>\n

\u201cI told ya not to cross him. You knew what he was like. You knew what he would do, but I don\u2019t see how getting Cartwright killed helps us. I know you\u2019re always planning, but this time you got me confused as to what you\u2019re up to.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not planning anything, but Roscoe, after Clint kills Adam and the posse gets here looking for him, you better decide which side you\u2019re going to be on.\u201d<\/p>\n

Looking thoughtful, Roscoe considered what she had said and what Clint was like. Finally he had a fair idea of what she wanted to do. \u201cYou got him to hit you on purpose, didn\u2019t you? That way you can tell the sheriff and the Cartwrights that he forced you to let him stay here. But how can I make it look like I wasn\u2019t part of it?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI could tie you to the center post in the bunkhouse. You might have to stay there a while until this all plays out. It\u2019ll be a lot better than hanging or getting shot by a posse though.\u201d<\/p>\n

After thinking about all that had happened and what she had said, Roscoe made his decision. \u201cWhen would you do that?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cTonight while you\u2019re on watch. I don\u2019t think there\u2019s any other time to do it. Clint will be drinking after he kills Adam. When he goes to sleep it off, I\u2019ll come out and tie you up.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJust one thing: what if we get real lucky and Adam kills him?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI would certainly prefer that, but it\u2019s real hard to survive an ambush.\u201d She thought for a bit. \u201cIt could happen though, couldn\u2019t it? All right, let\u2019s go tie you up now. I\u2019ll watch and if I see Clint riding back, I\u2019ll free you immediately, and we can go with the original plan. If, God willing, I see Adam riding this way, you can rub your wrists real hard on the ropes to get some rope burns before I free you. That way it\u2019ll look like you were tied up for a while. Is it a deal, partner?\u201d Roscoe smiled and nodded. The two of them headed to the small bunkhouse then to carry out their plan.<\/p>\n

By late morning, Adam was riding over to see Rose. He felt uneasy as he neared her ranch. He didn\u2019t know why at first until his training kicked in. There were no birds singing and no squirrels chirping. There was a hunter in the woods. He leaned down to loosen his rifle in the saddle scabbard, and that act saved his life. The bullet meant to shatter his skull creased it instead although the force of that and the ensuing concussion caused him to fall from the saddle. He heard footsteps approaching and wanted to get up to fight but couldn\u2019t. He heard the man talking then.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou thought you were so smart and so tough. Well, seems you ain\u2019t any more than any other man I ever killed. I think I can bury you right here. Ground is nice and soft, and I don\u2019t have to lug you too far. It was nice and convenient, you coming this way.\u201d<\/p>\n

As Adam lay there with blood streaming into his face, he regained his senses although the headache he had was one of the worst he could imagine. He kept his eyes closed until he heard the sound of digging. He opened his right eye just a bit. His left eye was covered with blood so he didn\u2019t even try to use that one. What he saw and heard gave him a bit of encouragement.\u00a0\u00a0 The man was talking to himself and making quite a bit of noise with the digging. He had his back to Adam. Slowly and with each move deliberately planned, Adam moved to his knees and then stood by grasping Sport\u2019s saddle. He edged to the back of the nervous horse and carefully stepped about five feet until he had a tree he could use for cover and for support. That small effort took everything he had but desperation forced him to remain focused. He pulled his pistol and made sure it was ready to use. Then he waited. Once Clint had dug down several feet, he dropped the shovel and turned to walk toward Sport stopping in shock when he didn\u2019t see a body lying there next to the animal.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou looking for me?\u201d<\/p>\n

Clint looked up in shock and then drew. Adam shot him before he pulled his pistol from the holster. On the ground, Clint drew his weapon so Adam was forced to shoot him again. Clint didn\u2019t survive the second shot. Adam sank to his knees then and turned to lean against the tree. He aimed his pistol straight into the air and fired three times.<\/p>\n

On the Reynolds Ranch, they had heard the rifle shot. Waiting to see Clint come riding back, they heard two more shots that sounded like they had been fired from a pistol. They waited longer and heard three more pistol shots fired in rapid succession and then nothing more.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe better get ready for Clint to ride back.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe can\u2019t be sure until we see who\u2019s riding in. There were a lot of shots after that first rifle shot. Maybe Clint missed, and Adam killed him.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve been thinking. If it\u2019s Adam who rides in, he would have expected me to free you as soon as I had the chance. I need to be tied too so it all makes sense.\u201d<\/p>\n

First Roscoe tied Rose\u2019s wrists so that she had burns there. Once he untied Rose, she tied and then untied Roscoe who had rubbed his wrists against the rope until he had some significant rope burns.<\/p>\n

\u201cI need to look like I been in a bit of a fight. If it\u2019s Clint, I can say you tried to get away.\u201d<\/p>\n

Rose nodded and then hit him twice in the face. He had bruises from the two blows. It would be enough they thought to convince anyone. The two of them headed to the kitchen then to get cold compresses for what they had done to each other.<\/p>\n

\u201cRoscoe, we make a good team.\u201d Rose never felt quite so alive as when she was planning something and then carrying out her plan.<\/p>\n

Smiling, Roscoe had to nod in agreement. \u201cYes, we do, Rose; yes, we do.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 9<\/strong><\/p>\n

Several hours passed as Rose and Roscoe waited on the ranch for word of what had happened to Clint or Adam. No one came to tell them anything. Both worried that somehow Clint had been taken alive. In that case, they should be fleeing the area, but neither wanted to spend their life as a fugitive. Finally, Rose had Roscoe hitch up the carriage. He rode ahead to scout out the situation and Rose drove behind him. Once Roscoe got to a good observation point above the Ponderosa, he saw that the sheriff was in the yard of the Ponderosa. There was a body on a horse but he couldn\u2019t be sure who was slung over that saddle. He saw Ben and Joe Cartwright as well as some of the hands. Then he saw Adam\u2019s horse tied to the hitching rail. A short time later, the sheriff rode out leading the horse that carried the body. The red hair was identifiable even at a distance. Roscoe visibly relaxed, turned, and waved to Rose to come forward. He and she then rode down to the Ponderosa yard where they were greeted by Ben and Joe.<\/p>\n

\u201cMrs. Reynolds.\u201d There was an edge to Ben\u2019s voice.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry, Mr. Cartwright, but we came here for help.\u201d As Rose moved out from under the canopy of the carriage, the bruises on her face and neck were obvious. Ben and Joe stepped forward then with the slight hostility giving way to concern. Ben moved to help her down from the carriage and noted the abrasions on her wrists.<\/p>\n

\u201cI am sorry. Adam warned me about living out here, and not having protection. I\u2019m a fool, I guess, because I never expected anything like this to happen.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat happened?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cA man came to my house. He was awful. He left us tied up and rode off. He said if we went to the sheriff, he would be sure to kill us. I\u2019m sorry. It makes no sense, but that\u2019s what happened.\u201d<\/p>\n

Roscoe came to stand beside Rose, and Ben and Joe could see the bruises on his face as well as similar abrasions on his wrists. \u201cTook us a while to get free, Mr. Cartwright. Adam always said ifn we needed help, we could come here, and you folks would help us. Is Adam around?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, he is, but he\u2019s hurt. Tell me, was the man who tied you up and threatened you a man with red hair?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, he was. Do you know who it was?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, but he tried to kill Adam. We have no idea why. Adam ended up killing him, although he does have a slight head injury, and at the moment, a terrible headache. Let\u2019s go inside. I think he\u2019ll want to see you, Rose.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ushering Rose up the stairs, Ben showed her to Adam\u2019s room. Doctor Martin was irrigating his left eye to clean away the particles of dried blood. He had already cleaned up the bullet crease and put a small bandage over it. Rose could see that Adam\u2019s hair was matted with dried blood on the left side. Hoss was helping the doctor, and Adam was mostly grimacing while trying to keep his eye open for the doctor\u2019s ministrations. Rose and Ben waited by the door until Paul finished. He put a soft cloth moistened with oil over Adam\u2019s eye and an eye patch over that.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe best thing for you now is to rest. I can\u2019t give you anything for the pain, but I\u2019m sure Hop Sing will have an ice pack ready soon, and probably some tea for you as well. The man seems to have a tea for everything.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss got a clean shirt from Adam\u2019s armoire and helped him remove the soiled one. He took a wet cloth and wiped blood from Adam\u2019s shoulder and chest before helping him put on the clean shirt. Adam had closed his right eye as the doctor finished. When he opened that eye, he saw his father and Rose standing in the doorway. He couldn\u2019t be sure but thought that Rose looked as if she had been hurt. As she moved closer, he could see the bruises in the shape of fingers on her throat, the cut lip, and bruises on her cheeks.<\/p>\n

\u201cRose, what happened?\u201d<\/p>\n

Moving to sit beside him on the bed, Rose reached up to touch his cheek. \u201cI\u2019m so glad you\u2019re alive. I had no idea you had been hurt.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRose, you\u2019re hurt. Can you tell me what happened?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, not now. You need to rest, and I\u2019m safe now. We can talk later.\u201d Rose gently pushed Adam to lay back and rest his head on the pillows that Hoss had put there to prop him up. She sat quietly holding his hand marveling at how wonderful she felt that he was still alive and that Clint was dead. She heard the other men leave, and sat quietly by Adam\u2019s side until she could tell he had fallen asleep. Because of some things Adam had told her about his father, she thought that Ben wouldn\u2019t like her spending too much time in Adam\u2019s bedroom, so she got up to go downstairs. Adam held onto her hand though not letting her leave. She looked to see that he had opened his right eye and was looking at her with concern.<\/p>\n

\u201cRose, tell me what happened.\u201d<\/p>\n

So Rose told a story of a stranger who had invaded her ranch, tied up Roscoe, and then attacked her in her own home. She felt Adam\u2019s fingers tighten over hers. \u201cRose, did he hurt you?\u201d And Rose knew what Adam was asking. She denied that they had ended up in bed. She said that he forced her to cook a meal for him and provide him with alcohol. Then she said he tied her up before he fell asleep. The next day she said he forced her to fix him a breakfast before tying her again and threatening her. He had ridden out and she had managed to free herself before freeing Roscoe. She told him that then they came to the Ponderosa to get help. Adam reached out for her and pulled her into an embrace.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, I should be consoling you. You\u2019re the one who got shot.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRose, nothing like that should ever have happened to you. I\u2019m so sorry he hurt you. You should stay here until we can figure out a way for you to be safe on your ranch.\u201d They talked quietly about that for some time.<\/p>\n

Downstairs, Doctor Martin gave a positive report to the family that Adam would only need to be in bed for that day, and then to work lightly for a few days unless dizziness was a problem. After Paul left, both Joe and Ben noted how worried Hoss looked. Finally Joe needed an answer so he asked him why he looked so worried after knowing Adam would be all right.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy did he want to kill Adam? And why did he have a shovel with him, and then want to bury him right there? It don\u2019t make no sense to me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, it doesn\u2019t make sense to me either. Unless he was hired by someone to kill Adam, his actions are very strange.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, and Pa, listening to her tell her story, it sounded so strange too.\u201d Hoss then repeated the story that Rose had told them. Joe looked incredulous as Hoss talked. Ben noted that and had to ask why.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, that is exactly the story that Roscoe told me when you took Rose up to see Adam.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, course they got the same story. It happened to the both of them.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Hoss, I mean all the words were the same and everything. It was like hearing Roscoe talk when you were talking. That\u2019s an awful big coincidence.\u201d<\/p>\n

After thinking for a bit, Hoss had a plan. Joe, you ride on back to the Reynolds place with Roscoe. You can tell him you just want to help him make sure there\u2019s no damage that has to get fixed. I reckon Rose is gonna want to stay with Adam for a bit. Tell him we\u2019ll get her back there safely later. Then I\u2019m taking a few of the hands who know how to track, and we\u2019re gonna go back to where we found Adam and take a look around to see what we can see.\u201d<\/p>\n

While Hoss was setting out with some men to check out the tracks left by Clint, Roy Coffee was asking around town about the red-haired man. He never got a name for him, but he did get some useful information. People remembered someone who had a shock of red hair like that. According to a number of people, he had been asking questions about the Cartwrights and Adam in particular before riding out of town and apparently directly to the Reynolds Ranch. Roy found it all very strange and wondered what it could mean. He decided that he would take a ride out to the Ponderosa the next morning to see if Adam or any of the Cartwrights could recall a problem they had with a red-haired man.<\/p>\n

At the Ponderosa, Adam had fallen asleep, and Rose came downstairs to take her leave. She wanted to get back to her ranch to make sure that all the details for her story were in place. She had no idea that Joe had gone back with Roscoe, and that he had insisted that they ought to go in the house and clean it up so that Rose wouldn\u2019t have to face that task when she got home. Roscoe insisted that he could take care of things himself, but Joe insisted that a good neighbor would help. He found out a few interesting things as well. As he and Roscoe exited the house, Ben drove up in the carriage with Rose. He had Buck tied to the back.<\/p>\n

\u201cHello, Roscoe. I wanted to make sure that Rose got back here safely, and that you two have a plan to be safe here. I could send over a couple of hands to help out if you need them.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I think, if Rose doesn\u2019t mind, that I should move into the spare bedroom in the house to better protect her. I\u2019ll go to town tomorrow to see about hiring a couple of hands. I guess we really do need some help here.\u201d<\/p>\n

Rose nodded because she was glad that Roscoe had come up with a way to protect them while reassuring the Cartwrights. She had no idea that there was information gathering that was going to be a major problem. She and Ben had gone past Hoss and some hands who had done their best to look like they were fixing the fence line when in fact, they were checking tracks from her ranch to the ambush site. That night as Rose and Roscoe celebrated extricating themselves from a life of crime, Hoss was in a very serious conversation with his father and brother about the troubling things they had found out. None of them slept well that night. The next morning, the breakfast table was unusually quiet. Adam looked rather awful with significant bruising on the left side of his head especially around his ear and the side of his neck. His left eye was red and teary, and he still had a bandage on the wound from the bullet. He ate little and sipped coffee. Finally he had to ask.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s the elephant in the room? There\u2019s something big here, but apparently no one wants to tell me.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss looked at Ben who nodded. They needed to talk about everything that had happened. Before Hoss could say anything though, there was a knock on the door. Joe answered it finding Roy. \u201cYou\u2019re here pretty early, Roy. Did something happen?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNah, but I found out some troubling things yesterday, and I wanted to talk with all of you about them.\u201d Once he was settled at the table with a plate of Hop Sing\u2019s eggs, ham, and toast, Roy explained what he had found out. Adam was surprised, but his family didn\u2019t seem as if they were surprised at all.<\/p>\n

\u201cAll right, it\u2019s time now for Hoss to tell the rest of the story.\u201d Adam had seen Hoss look to their father earlier and knew Hoss had some information that he knew would be a problem for Adam.<\/p>\n

Taking a deep breath and then expelling it, Hoss began. \u201cWe went to where we found you, Adam. The tracks that man made were in direct line from the Reynolds Ranch to that spot. Then we found where he had tied his horse and it was clear that the horse had been there a while. He was there a while too. We found a lot of tracks around that area.\u201d<\/p>\n

Roy knew of course what that meant. \u201cSo he was asking about Adam in town, and then he went out to ambush him, but how did he know when Adam would be coming that way? I mean, the Ponderosa is a big place.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam dropped his head. There were a number of people who knew he went to see Rose in the middle of the day on a Saturday, but there were only two who could have told the would be assassin. The news got worse when Joe added what he had found out.<\/p>\n

\u201cRoscoe told me what happened. When I heard Hoss telling the story of what Rose had said, it was exactly what Roscoe had said to me.\u201d Adam looked a bit skeptical, so Joe explained more. \u201cAdam, it was word for word exactly the same story. Now how could that have been the way unless they practiced what they were going to say. When I went back with Roscoe yesterday to check out the house to make sure Rose wouldn\u2019t have any mess to clean up, there was only one bed that had been used. Rose\u2019s dress and other things were right next to the bed, and it looked like two people slept in that bed and probably did a lot more than just sleep.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam didn\u2019t have to ask how Joe would know that last part. He was experienced enough to know that. Ben had questions too, and Adam was hurting because he knew the answers.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy did he have a shovel with him? Why was he going to bury Adam?\u201d<\/p>\n

From the looks that Roy and Joe had, Adam guessed that they knew the answer too. \u201cBecause he intended to stay around here, and he couldn\u2019t do that if my body was found. There would be too many questions. If I disappeared though, people would assume I had left the area. He would have been able to stay here because no one would have connected him with my disappearance.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss was trying to process the whole thing. \u201cBut where could he stay?\u201d Then it dawned on him. \u201cHe planned to stay on the Reynolds Ranch, didn\u2019t he?\u201d Seeing the look on Adam\u2019s face was painful. \u201cDadburnit, Adam, I\u2019m real sorry.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 10<\/strong><\/p>\n

All five men were quiet for a time until Adam spoke. \u201cI realize now what I always found so unusual about her story. It was always correct. I mean, it was grammatically correct and in perfect chronological order. Who tells their family history that way? She rehearsed it. It was all a lie.\u201d After thinking a bit more, Adam continued with pain in his voice as he talked softly. \u201cI remember being in plays in college. Those who weren\u2019t very good actors always sounded like they were reading their parts even after they had memorized their script. There was never any emotion in their voice or mannerisms. That\u2019s how Rose told her story when she told me, and then she told the exact same version when she was here.\u201d Turning to Roy, Adam had to ask him what he would do next.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, there\u2019s the truth and then there\u2019s trying to prove it\u2019s the truth. Those are two very different things sometimes. Now I know what the truth is just like you do, but I don\u2019t think we could ever prove it. It\u2019s based on guesses. Now I know it\u2019s logical and fits the facts we know, but we got no evidence of anything.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m going to go over there to talk with Rose.\u201d<\/p>\n

After Adam said that, Hoss and Joe talked at the same time saying the same thing. \u201cI\u2019m going with you.\u201d<\/p>\n

Roy had a caution. \u201cNow don\u2019t you boys do anything stupid. Right now, she\u2019s innocent according to the law so don\u2019t do anything to get yourself in trouble.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNone of us will break any law, Roy. Joe and me will see to it, but Adam needs to get the truth from her. We\u2019ll tell you all about it afterwards.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam had pushed his chair back from the table. His elbows rested on his knees and his head was down. He looked every bit the defeated man. Hoss stood and placed a hand on his shoulder.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll saddle up Sport. When we\u2019re ready, we\u2019ll come inside to get ya.\u201d<\/p>\n

Getting a small nod in acceptance, Hoss looked at Joe and inclined his head toward the front door. The two men walked out with Roy who rode back to town intent on trying to find out the identity of the red-haired man. Hoss and Joe went to saddle horses after bidding goodbye to Roy. Neither of them wanted to go get Adam when they were ready to go. The look of pain he had was from far more than the injury.<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, I\u2019ll go get him. I wish we could wait on this but who knows what else she\u2019s gonna do. You know I thought she really did love him even if things were a bid odd. I never thought she would want someone to kill him.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe she didn\u2019t, Hoss. Maybe that man decided to do it and she had nothing to do with it. Maybe she does love him and she really was tied up because she tried to stop him from going to kill Adam.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNow, Joe, ain\u2019t you the one saying they shared the same bed the night before he tried to kill Adam. Something pretty cold-hearted about that. Maybe she did try to stop him but not hard enough if she really did love him.\u201d<\/p>\n

Inside the house, Hoss found Ben trying to talk with Adam. He wasn\u2019t having much luck trying to get him to take it easy on himself.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, I messed up again. At least this time, an innocent man didn\u2019t have to die, but I read her wrong and almost got myself killed. Somehow she\u2019s tied to that gang. I should have listened when Hoss first voiced his suspicions. I was so ready to let someone boost my boost my spirit that I ignored all else. I was stupid.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou were not being stupid. You were being a man, an upright, honest man. Son, anyone can be fooled when the other person is intelligent and purposefully seeks to deceive. Some people take advantage of trust, integrity, and even love to mislead others. Don\u2019t be angry with yourself because you found her attractive, fun, and interesting. She is all of those things, but she also seems to be a conniving witch. I\u2019ve had my own experiences with women like that. We both survived these experiences.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo, what? I\u2019ll better appreciate a good woman when I find one then?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou say that as if it isn\u2019t true. Don\u2019t we all appreciate those we love even more when we see how evil others can be? Go see her. Confront her and get her to tell you the truth. Then you can say goodbye to her and walk away clean.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, I think I was falling in love with her even though I said I wasn\u2019t. She was smart, funny, adventurous, and she made me feel good. Now all I feel is pain. I don\u2019t know what I did to make her want to do this to me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, it\u2019s possible that she does love you, and that she did what she did to survive. You will only know if you go talk with her. If she\u2019ll tell you the truth, perhaps then you can make sense out of all of this.\u201d<\/p>\n

Looking as weary as he felt Adam stood when he saw Hoss. There was no need for words. He could see Hoss\u2019 caring by the way he looked. He handed Adam his hat, but held his arm when he wanted to reach for his holster.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, it might be best ifn you don\u2019t take that. Joe and me will be there to back you up if that\u2019s needed. You already got quite a problem with your head, and I could tell by the way you\u2019re walking that you\u2019re a might unsteady yet. We\u2019ll take it easy so you can talk to her when we get there, but you shouldn\u2019t even be thinking about wearing your pistol. You couldn\u2019t hit what you\u2019re aiming at now anyway.\u201d<\/p>\n

The three brothers rode to the Reynolds Ranch taking twice as long as usual to get there. When they arrived, it was fairly clear that the ranch was deserted. The door to the stable as well as the gate to the main corral stood open. Adam dismounted and went into the house to be sure she was gone and that nothing bad had happened to her. Her clothing was gone, and the kitchen looked like it had been cleaned out of food and cooking utensils. Hoss came in to say that the wagon that had been next to the stable was gone too. It appeared that Rose and Roscoe had left. Adam walked out of the house and dropped down on the top step.<\/p>\n

\u201cHow did she know?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, she is right smart. She knew Joe was over here looking around. Roscoe probably told her what he mighta seen. She and Pa rode right by us when we was looking at the tracks that man who tried to kill ya made. She musta figured it out.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe walked out then with a sheaf of papers in his hand. \u201cThese were stuffed in the stove, but there was too much and if snuffed out the coals. Some papers were burned on the bottom, but you can read most of these.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam began to slowly page through the papers. Joe had taken a quick look when he found them and shook his head when Hoss looked at him quizzically. Adam handed one set of papers to Hoss. \u201cThere\u2019s her life story. She wrote it out so she could remember all the parts.\u201d He studied a few more of the papers. He handed another set to Hoss and then another. \u201cHere\u2019s some paperwork about investments she signed over to the three hands who left. Here\u2019s some paper work about her other investments. Hoss passed each set to Joe who read them over as well. \u201cHere\u2019s a letter from a lawyer in Placerville who represented a Clint Duggar in court there. I\u2019m guessing that would be our red-headed man. It\u2019s addressed to Violet Wenz. That must be her real name.\u201d<\/p>\n

It was clear to all three of them that Rose or Violet was the head of this gang. Everything pointed to her being the one who planned and organized. She was as responsible as any of the men for those who had been killed during the robberies they had done. Joe gathered all the papers and stuck them inside his vest. Dejected as he could be, Adam looked up at him from where he sat on the porch steps.<\/p>\n

\u201cI suppose we need to take those papers to Roy.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI found them, I\u2019ll take them. Roy will figure it all out just as quickly as we did. You and Hoss can go home.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe was correct. Roy sent out wanted posters for Violet Wenz or Rose Reynolds and another for Roscoe. Adam did the drawings for him. He didn\u2019t say much about it. Roy rode out to the Ponderosa to ask him to do it because he had seen much more of the two of them than anyone else had. He had nodded, gotten some drawing paper, and before Roy left that day, Adam had handed him two sketches. Information was sent to authorities in western states for the three men who had left before Clint showed up. The man who had traveled south was apprehended first. He had only been involved in the Reno robbery and turned on the others giving up all the information he had in order to get a lighter sentence. Eventually all of the others were apprehended and sent to California to stand trial. The three men were sentenced to hang, but because of other circumstances, Rose, or Violet, got a life sentence.<\/p>\n

After the results of the trial were published, Adam packed a bag to head for Sacramento. Ben told him not to go, but Adam said that he had to know. He had moped around the house telling anyone who asked that he was fine. His family knew he wasn\u2019t, but there was nothing they could say that could help him. They could only hope that time would allow him to heal. Adam knew that there was one thing that would make him heal, and he was going to Rose to see if he could get that. Ben gave Adam a ride to town and one last time offered to go with him.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, I need to do this. I\u2019ll be fine. You know I need to know. If it was you, wouldn\u2019t you want to know?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ben had to agree, but he knew that Adam would come home happy with what he had found or perhaps devastated if there was one more disappointment. As Adam rode in the stage, he didn\u2019t talk to anyone. The other passengers attempted to engage him in their conversations, but he sat silently as if he heard nothing that they said. One of the women in particular was vocal about ungentlemanly behavior, but he ignored that too. He wasn\u2019t going to get drawn into anything. He had been involved too much in too many things that led to poor outcomes. He had no energy left for anything that wasn\u2019t directly important to him. Some may have considered his behavior selfish, but he was in survival mode. He could only do so much, and he needed all of his resources to save himself. Once Adam arrived in Sacramento, he checked in at his hotel room, cleaned up, and then went to see Rose. He couldn\u2019t think of her as Violet. In his mind, she would always be Rose. At the jail, he identified himself and stated his reason for visiting. With a look of sympathy as well as some disapproval, the sheriff gave him permission to visit her.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe will be transferred in a few days. The baby will be going to an orphanage unless someone steps forward to take him.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam only nodded and followed a guard through the door into the cell block where Rose had been held before and since her trial. The men were in a separate cell block. He walked up to the bars of her cell, and Rose looked up to see who had come to see her this time. She gasped when she saw Adam standing there.<\/p>\n

\u201cSaying I\u2019m sorry is absolutely inadequate. I know that, but I am truly sorry. I did love you, you know. I tried to get out of my past so I could have a future with you. As you know, it didn\u2019t work.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam decided to be blunt and get this over with as quickly as he could. \u201cDid you love me? Do you even know what love is?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, I do, and I still love you, but there\u2019s no future any more. I\u2019ll never be free. I won\u2019t get to see my son grow up. I have to ask you. Did you love me?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not sure. I think I was falling in love with you, but everything I\u2019ve learned has put all that I thought I knew and felt in doubt. Did you love Clint?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo. I can honestly say I never loved anyone before you. I didn\u2019t even know what love was. I thought it was some silly thing that emotional people used to make their lives seem more meaningful. Being with you, going to the dance, going to church, working on the ranch; all of that taught me things I never knew. It\u2019s too bad I learned so late what I had been missing. Now I\u2019m in love again, but I have to let him go too. They\u2019re letting me nurse him until other arrangements can be made. Then I\u2019ll never see him again.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDid you try to change your life because you were with child?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, sadly, I didn\u2019t even know I was. After all these years, I thought I couldn\u2019t have a child. Like everything else, I learned too late that I was wrong.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThe life story you told me. Was any of it true?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, but it wasn\u2019t my truth. I borrowed everything from other people\u2019s lives and constructed a story for myself. I came out here with my mother who opened a house for men to visit the painted ladies. That\u2019s how she planned to strike it rich in the gold rush. I was thirteen then.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cA brothel.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, and she wanted me to work there and eventually run the place. I didn\u2019t like it at all, so I left. I preferred being alone to being used like a piece of property and having to act like I liked it. She was killed by a drunken customer only a year later. Considering what my mother did for a living when she was young, you won\u2019t be surprised to know that I have no good idea who my father is. Oh, she told me who it was, but I have no reason to believe that it was the truth. I\u2019m not sure she even knew the truth. She lied to herself for so long about things, that I think she may have thought it was the truth. Now sixteen years later, I\u2019ve managed to be a worse person than either of my parents. I can only hope my son has a better life.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIs he mine?\u201d<\/p>\n

In answer, Rose pulled the blanket back to show the sleeping baby to Adam. His red hair and pale skin was answer enough.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll do my best to see that he is placed with a good family. Once that\u2019s accomplished, I\u2019ll write you a letter to let you know that he\u2019ll have a better life.\u201d As Adam turned to leave, Rose stood and moved to the bars of the cell.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, I never meant to hurt you. I hope that someday you can forgive me, and let me know that you forgive me. I don\u2019t care how long it takes. I\u2019d like to know if you ever do.\u201d<\/p>\n

Without saying another word, Adam turned and walked from the room. He never looked back. He did what he had said he would before returning to Nevada. He said little when he got home. His family didn\u2019t need him to tell them anything. That he needed to take that trip and that he came home alone answered any questions they had. They did their best to try to cheer him up, but as Ben advised, only time could heal the wounds he had. He took trips to negotiate contracts but didn\u2019t seem to enjoy the time away as he once had. He seemed to enjoy ranch work even less so when he again suggested that he could take a trip to St. Louis to buy horses to improve their breeding stock, Ben agreed he ought to go. Joe hoped to go along but a severely sprained ankle stopped him from doing that. Adam seemed almost relieved to be going alone.<\/p>\n

Hoss took over Adam\u2019s planned trip to San Francisco to finalize the details on some Ponderosa contracts. Joe grumbled but there was nothing he could do about that either. Two weeks later, Hoss arrived back in Virginia City. He stopped to see if there was any mail before he got his horse from the livery stable for the ride home. There was only one letter. \u00a0It was from Adam, and Hoss was certain he knew what it said, but it was addressed to their father so he didn\u2019t open it. When he got home, his father was very joyful to see him. Hoss handed him the letter after Ben broke his hug. From the look on his face, Hoss guessed that their father knew what the likely contents were as well. Joe wasn\u2019t expecting it though.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy do you two look so down? Hoss is back with contracts, and we got a letter from Adam. You should be happy.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe, would you help me with my horse while I tell you about all the work we gotta do because of those contracts?\u201d<\/p>\n

A bit puzzled, Joe followed Hoss to the stable as Ben took the letter inside. His younger sons found him at his desk when they entered. His eyes were red. Hoss leaned down to pick up the letter, and when he finished reading it, he handed it to Joe. After a minute, Joe looked up in anguish and threw the letter on the desk before stomping outside.<\/p>\n

\u201cGo with him, Hoss. He didn\u2019t see this coming like we did.\u201d Ben picked up the letter to read it again perhaps to see if there was more between the lines that he hadn\u2019t noticed in his first reading because he was so sad.<\/p>\n

\u201cDear Father, Hoss, and Joe:<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I\u2019m so sorry to tell you this by letter, but I knew if I said anything to you, you would have talked me out of it and made me feel guilty about my decision as you always did before. I should have done this several years ago, but it was only wallowing in regrets and self-recrimination for more than a year that has forced me to face what I know I needed to do for a long time now. Pa, I know that the Ponderosa was your dream and that my mother shared that dream. I know that Inger wanted that dream too as did Marie. Hoss and Joe have made it their dream also, but it was never my dream. For many years, I helped you build your dream, but now I have to seek my own. Sadly I\u2019m not sure what my dream is, but I know I want to travel. I want to see things about which I have only read and seen pictures and drawings. I want to do something that will last and mark my passage through this world. I could never do that while standing in your shadow. I think you knew all of this or guessed it, and I know Hoss knows it too. Joe, I\u2019m afraid, will hate me for doing this to you. Pa, I hope you and Hoss can forgive me, and I hope too that someday Joe will be able to forgive me.\u00a0\u00a0 I may be a selfish, self-centered ungrateful man for doing what I\u2019m doing, but I would have dragged you all down into my well of self-pity and regrets if I had stayed. I have done what I set out to do here. There are a half dozen horses on their way to you now. They should arrive within a few days. I plan to stop in Kentucky and Tennessee to see if there are more horses that would be of benefit to the Ponderosa. My travel will take me to New York and Boston next, and then probably to Europe. I\u2019ll write when I can to let you know where I am. Thank you for everything you have done for me, and know that my love for you and for my home will never waver. I hope that I will be welcome when I return someday for that is my intention if you will still have me.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Love Always, Adam.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Adam\u2019s Very Good Years<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 1<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cThe weather here in Kentucky is more fierce than I thought it would be. There have been thunderstorms every other day, but I have still been lucky enough to ride some of the horses here and have some beautiful animals. Now, Pa, I know you never wanted racehorses, but these are magnificent animals. If you don\u2019t want them for a horse breeding operation on the Ponderosa, they should bring excellent prices in California and more than double the money I paid for them and the shipping costs. As you know, racing is getting very popular in California, and many people would like these horses to race, or for their stables to breed horses or simply to be status symbols. That\u2019s why I thought to buy them even though you and Joe may not choose to expand the horse breeding operations of the ranch.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cHere in Lexington, I\u2019ve met some very nice people who have opened their home to me during my stay. They know how to run an excellent horse operation with well-designed stables and exercise rings as well as paddocks and pastures. The damage from the war was minimal here, and the ranch itself supplied many mounts for the Union cavalry. I hope that doesn\u2019t color Joe\u2019s opinion of the horses that will be arriving there soon. The Roland family that owns this horse farm lost family on both sides of the conflict, but like most here, they\u2019re looking to the future instead of the past. <\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cMr. Roland thinks that I will be disappointed in the next leg of my journey for he says the air, water, and land of New York City have suffered a great deal from neglect and overpopulation. His daughter Corinne though said that she envies me that trip because she would love to attend the plays and concerts that would be available if she lived closer to the city. I would certainly enjoy her company if that was possible, but it is not. I will be traveling on tomorrow and will write again when I have seen which of them is correct in their assumptions of how I will evaluate my time in the grand city.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m sorry that I will not be in one place long enough for you to write to me, but if necessary, please contact my friend Bale Corrigan in New York. I will attempt to update my information with him as often as possible, and he has agreed to be a conduit for any necessary correspondence.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAs always, your loving son, <\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cAdam.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

As Ben set the letter aside, he had to smile. He could hear the joy in his son\u2019s voice even in that short letter. Adam had already shaken off much of his sadness and seemed to have an excitement about life that had been missing with him for some time. Just a few weeks had made a considerable difference. Ben had been very worried about Adam when that first letter had arrived announcing that he would not be returning home from St. Louis. Now he had a plan, was organizing his future, and seemed to have some definite goals in mind. He also seemed to have noticed the young lady, and Ben found that reassuring as well. Ben had to hope that Adam would not face any serious setbacks or disappointments especially with no one there to help him. Of course, that was probably part of what he wanted too. He wanted to stand on his own and prove himself if only to himself. Then Ben grimaced a bit knowing how Joe would likely react. He had been in a sour mood ever since Adam had left, but perhaps the arrival of the horses could help soften the barrier that he had put up against his oldest brother. Suddenly Ben realized that he was accepting the idea of breeding and selling race horses or show horses. As Adam had mentioned, it would be a good source of profit, and there was little downside to it for their investment was minimal compared to the profits they might reap. He had a feeling he had been manipulated into this by his oldest son but had to admit it was well done. The letter had been written nearly two weeks earlier so Adam was likely in New York or perhaps even on his way to Boston.<\/p>\n

Later, when Hoss and Joe read the letter, their reactions were predictable. Hoss had a big grin mentioning that Adam still had an eye for horses as well as one for the ladies. Joe acted as if he didn\u2019t even want to read it but did when Ben asked him to do so because there was a business proposition in there that they ought to discuss.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m busy enough. He left and we\u2019ve all got more work to do. He doesn\u2019t have to pile any more on me than I already have.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, son, if that\u2019s your decision, the horses will only be here a short time until we can make arrangements with a broker in California to sell them for us. Just by getting here, they\u2019re probably worth three or four times what Adam paid for them. It will be a nice profit for the Ponderosa.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat much?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes. I know I said I never wanted racehorses on the Ponderosa, but Adam made a few good points. They wouldn\u2019t be for our use, but to set up a moneymaking horse breeding operation. Of course, there might be times when we would like to cross-breed them for our horses too, but it\u2019s a moot point if they\u2019re going to be sold.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, maybe we ought to take a look at them before we decide to sell them.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course, if that\u2019s what you want, we can do that. They should be here soon. Adam sent this letter nearly two weeks ago.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe picked up the letter then to see if he could glean any more information from it. Hoss looked over Joe\u2019s head at their father who winked. Even from all those miles away, Adam was looking out for his youngest brother and trying to heal the emotional wounds he had caused. It was working too. When the horses arrived two days later, Joe said they ought to see what they could do about a racehorse breeding operation. He said if it didn\u2019t work, they could still sell the horses for a hefty profit. Of course, the operation would succeed because Joe was an excellent judge of horses and how to train them. Hoss helped with their care and loved the beauty of the horses\u2019 lines.<\/p>\n

A month later, another letter arrived. Adam was in good spirits and said he agreed with what both Rolands, father and daughter, had said about New York. He had visited with friends, gone to the theater, concerts, the ballet, and the opera. Those last two made his brothers groan as Ben read the letter aloud. Adam said that Central Park was being developed and was a wonderful thought for a city of that size.<\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cMr. Roland was correct in that the city has suffered from too much growth in too little time, but Central Park is a haven in this large city. It is a boon to public health, and a testament to how this country values its resources. I have no experience in designing something like this, but I must say I am impressed by what the designers hope to accomplish here. I have a room in a hotel that overlooks the area, and in the early morning, when traffic in the streets consists mostly of a few delivery wagons and street cleaners, I could almost imagine I am home. I do miss all of you, and wish that somehow I could do what I must without leaving you so far behind, but it cannot be done. I\u2019m off to Boston next, but I fear it may have changed more than I wish. If it is anything like New York City, I shall visit only a month to revisit people and places I know before I leave for England.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cThe port here is very busy, and I shall attempt to book passage directly from Boston. I hope to sail on a clipper ship and see the seas that you and my grandfather sailed. Perhaps I will see whales. I look forward to that very much.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Ben\u2019s hand played over the ship-in-the-bottle that rested on a wooden stand on his desk. Adam had brought it back with him from his years in the east and presented it to his father on his return. He had said then that he wished he could sail the oceans and feel the wind in his face and see the stars above the ocean at night. He wanted to see whales, sharks, and dolphins as well as other creatures of the sea. He had talked of travel to Europe, but of course all of those things had been financially out of his reach then. Now he could afford to do those things, and Ben had to wonder if he had longed to do them all these years. He shook his head a bit as he realized he had never talked to his oldest son about what he wanted to do. He had always assumed he knew. He looked at Joe and Hoss who were clearly a bit concerned over his reaction to what had been a very positive letter.<\/p>\n

\u201cI never asked Adam what he wanted to do. I always thought I knew, and I incorrectly believed that his dream was the Ponderosa. What do you dream about doing?\u201d<\/p>\n

And the very thing that might have kept Adam on the Ponderosa began to happen for his brothers. They talked long into the night, and Ben went to bed nearly overwhelmed at what he had learned by one night of truly listening to his sons. He knew there were two things he needed to accept right away. Adam\u2019s idea of separating the Ponderosa businesses into separate legal entities was one. The other more manageable one was to hire a foreman. He and Joe had agreed to work on the first task, and Hoss had assumed responsibility for the second. Ben had no idea how tied down to the ranch his sons felt, and that sometimes it was almost to the point of feeling trapped. A foreman would alleviate some of that stress. As he looked out the window at the stars, he wished there was some way to let Adam know that his stiff backed unchanging father had finally bent to his sons\u2019 needs. Now he had regrets but as Adam had said months earlier, he would not wallow in them but would look forward to what he could do instead of what he had failed to do. It wouldn\u2019t be easy for him, but it would be a lot easier than having another son leave. He didn\u2019t think he could bear that, and it motivated him to change, which he didn\u2019t like to do, but it was well worth it.<\/p>\n

Almost a month later, a third letter arrived. By the time they read it, they knew that Adam was on his way to England. He was no longer on the same continent, and it left an odd feeling in the pit of Ben\u2019s stomach. He knew he would worry a lot more now he couldn\u2019t even travel to be with Adam and wouldn\u2019t likely know if he needed anything anyway.<\/p>\n

\u201cMuch as I feared, Boston had changed a great deal from the years I spent here. It seems the leaders of the city have one motivation now and that is money. Much could be done for the public, but it will not be done until lives are more important than greed. Grandfather\u2019s ships chandlery is no more. It has been torn down and a monstrosity of a warehouse has been built at that location to handle the shipload after shipload of goods leaving here and the people and materials being offloaded. One would not want to fall into the harbor for what is there doesn\u2019t resemble water in any way.\u00a0\u00a0 Offal and various other unidentifiable items float in a gray-green morass of various and sundry fluids one of which must be saltwater but only a chemist could be sure. I\u2019m glad that I did not visit the waterfront in New York. I may not have even made the trip here if I had. I did visit my mother and grandfather and left flowers on their resting places. The best thing is that the flowers were beautiful as shops overflow the downtown where anything and everything is for sale. For some respite from the urban smells and noise, I attended a summer party on the Nantucket shores. It was a delightful time and very restful.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI sail from Boston in a week\u2019s time. I am posting this letter from Connecticut because I am here to visit with Sam. He is doing a tour and I met him in Boston. He invited me to stay with him when he was in New Haven, and I was quite happy to do so. Sam isn\u2019t a married man either, and yet seems quite happy. He is beginning to make a very good income from his writing and his tours. He plans to spend some time in Europe, and I hope that perhaps we can meet there. I must say that it is an interesting thought to travel to Europe where I know no one, and no one knows me. It may sound strange to you but I am more nervous than when I left home to attend college. I hope to tour castles and cathedrals perhaps drawing and sketching some of them. I have no firm plans except that my next stop is London, and at some point I wish to see Paris and then Rome.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWish me well and say a little prayer for me now and then when you think of it. I pray for your safety and well-being every day, and will until I see you again.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

That last part nearly brought a tear to Ben\u2019s eye, but he had to smile at the pleasant tone of the letter and how excited he could tell Adam was about his plans. He had left home sad and beaten down, but now by these letters, it appeared he was rebounding very well. Ben did say a little prayer for him then, and vowed that he would do that every night and probably every morning until he saw him again. Hoss had listened intently not just to the words but also to the tone of the letter.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, he sure seems more like the old Adam in there. He\u2019s thinking and planning, but he sounds like he\u2019s got some of his old spirit back too.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe was more concerned. \u201cIf he\u2019s having such a great time, do you think he\u2019ll ever come back?\u201d<\/p>\n

No one had an answer.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 2<\/strong><\/p>\n

The day\u2019s light storm had stirred up the wind and waves but also helped the ship travel rapidly. Standing on deck at the rail, Adam held on tightly but reveled in the wind blowing through his hair and the light spray that occasionally blew up at him when the ship hit a wave particularly hard. Some of the crew thought him an unusual passenger who wouldn\u2019t stay down in his quarters when the seas were a bit rough, but those who loved the sea understood what he was doing and why. They were one week out from Boston. The air was fresh and the water reflected the sun\u2019s rays during the day as well as the moon\u2019s rays at night. Adam spent as much time on deck as he could. When it was calmer, some of the other passengers joined him, but most of the time he was alone. He had his thoughts and memories to occupy his mind. One especially nice memory was his week in Kentucky at the Roland home. He smiled as he remembered his first day there and the meeting with Corinne Roland.<\/p>\n

The route from St. Louis to Lexington did not allow easy transportation by railroad. Adam had chosen to ride coaches and found the roads in much better condition than the ones between Virginia City and Placerville with much nicer scenery along the way. While in St. Louis, Adam had purchased clothing more suitable for the eastern part of the country and for Europe, but for a coach ride to Lexington, Kentucky, he opted to wear his black shirt, pants, and hat as well as his boots. They were all in good condition and freshly laundered before he set out on his journey so he looked very much the respectable, and he thought authentic, rancher when he disembarked at his destination and inquired of the station master how he could get to the Roland horse farm. Within an hour, he was on his way in a rented carriage that the liveryman said he could bring back in a week when he was leaving. Adam had made arrangements to meet with Mr. Roland to see about buying horses. After Adam proved himself a serious buyer in St. Louis, he had been invited by Mr. Roland to stay with him to facilitate the negotiations. Adam knew it was also to prevent him from going to other sellers, but Roland Farm came highly recommended so he had no intention of going elsewhere although Mr. Roland didn\u2019t need to know that.<\/p>\n

Arriving at the farm, he was told that Mr. Roland and his daughter were at the far paddock and that he could walk there if he wished as they were exercising some of the yearlings. When Adam got there, Mr. Roland was very friendly, but his daughter looked with disdain at Adam. She knew that buyers were often made to feel out of place on a horse farm. This one had done his best to try to look like he knew his way around horses, but she had seen the carriage come down their long driveway. He hadn\u2019t ridden a horse to the farm as she would have done if she was a buyer. Adam Cartwright was introduced to Corinne Roland and smiled as ingratiatingly as he could, but she was barely polite. He decided to speak with her father then and ignore her if she didn\u2019t like his company. After about two hours, Adam had already made a few choices in his mind but didn\u2019t give away his preferences. When asked, he said that one in particular stood out as a spirited horse, but he wondered if anyone would be able to ride him. Corinne responded immediately.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s not a problem for a real horseman. Perhaps you would like to try riding him?\u201d<\/p>\n

There were a few barely concealed snickers among the grooms and trainers. Adam had a fair idea of what awaited him if he tried to ride the horse. He and his brothers had pulled that stunt on any number of men over the years, but somehow he wanted to show off for this woman. He did remember the last time he had ridden a horse that bucked, but he hoped this one was at least green broke as they would call him in Nevada. He couldn\u2019t back down.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019d like that. I haven\u2019t ridden anything in a few weeks so it would be good to get back in the saddle especially on that fine looking stallion.\u201d<\/p>\n

Corinne had to give him that. At least he knew it wasn\u2019t gelded, but she wasn\u2019t sure if he knew what that might mean with a stranger getting on his back especially one heavier than any rider to whom he was accustomed. The grooms saddled him up and walked him around the paddock once before stopping in front of Adam and the Rolands. Adam stepped to the horse\u2019s side and rubbed his neck and talked softly to him. Corinne thought it was a delaying tactic.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf you\u2019re afraid of him, we can get you an old mare to ride.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ignoring her, Adam continued to rub the horse\u2019s neck and talk to him softly before he stepped to the side and mounted up. Corinne had expected him to be bucked off almost immediately by the spirited animal. Only Corinne and one trainer had been able to successfully ride him. He had a habit of riding under low tree branches even with that man as he tried to dislodge him when he wasn\u2019t paying attention. Instead he shied to one side and then to the other as Adam kept pressure on him with his knees and a firm hold on the reins. Adam kept the horse\u2019s head down and nudged him to ride to the pasture through an open gate. The horse saw his chance and began to run hard. Adam did his best to rein him in but saw a low hanging tree branch coming up too fast. He dropped to the horses neck and slid part way to the side until they were past the tree, and then his displeasure be known to the horse. He rode the horse in several tight circles letting him burn off some energy but not letting him have his head and run where he wanted. Soon the horse calmed and began to run more naturally. Adam gave him a chance to prove himself and the horse galloped around the pasture. Finally knowing he had pushed the animal rather hard, Adam rode him back into the paddock and got applause from the men standing there.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s in need of more training. He\u2019s got spirit, but he could hurt someone if he isn\u2019t made to follow some basic rules of behavior. Someone has been too lenient with him. He\u2019s a proud animal, and he\u2019ll win some races if he ever learns to behave himself.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI trained him, and he\u2019s just fine with me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, that may be well and good if you plan to keep him as a pet, but if you want to race him or sell him, he needs more training and a firmer hand.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou have no right to come in here and tell us what to do with our horses.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, but because you wanted me to ride this one, it seemed only logical that you would want my evaluation when I was done especially if you thought to sell him to me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI wouldn\u2019t sell you one of my horses if you paid double the asking price.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI wasn\u2019t aware that I was buying horses from you. I thought I was buying from Roland Farm and that your father is the proprietor of this farm.\u201d<\/p>\n

Staying calm and actually enjoying the exchange, Adam had to smirk just a bit. Corinne had had enough and stormed off to the house. Adam and her father silently watched her go.<\/p>\n

\u201cSir, perhaps it would be better if I got a room in town and came back tomorrow to conduct our business.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNonsense, it isn\u2019t just that stallion that needs more training. I\u2019ve never seen a man who could stand up to my daughter like that. Usually the man is the one slinking away.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Roland, I\u2019m not sure I\u2019d call what she did slinking. It seemed more to be storming off. She doesn\u2019t know how to shoot, does she?\u201d<\/p>\n

Mr. Roland laughed and nodded. \u201cShe does, but she knows better than that. Please, call me Frederick. I think I am going to enjoy the next week very much. Let\u2019s go to the house. By now, my wife if wondering what happened.\u201d Adam looked a bit apprehensive at that. \u201cOh, don\u2019t worry about Corinne\u2019s mother. She\u2019s had as much trouble taming that girl as I have, and maybe more. She may enjoy this story as much as I enjoyed witnessing it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy is she like that?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe had four children. The oldest three contracted measles and died. Corinne was just an infant and didn\u2019t get sick. We quarantined her and her mother when the others got sick. One by one they died. I know we spoiled her. But what was cute and endearing at eight and ten and not so cute and endearing any more.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, I don\u2019t know. She is rather attractive and certainly is spirited.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMost men don\u2019t care for those characteristics. It may be one reason she acts that way. I don\u2019t think she ever wants to leave home. That\u2019s the other thing that happened. We sheltered her and kept her here so she has seen little of the world, and seems to have no desire to be anywhere else but here.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMy father probably wishes I felt like that.\u201d Frederick looked at him wondering what he could mean. \u201cI felt smothered staying in one place. I wanted to travel and to have new experiences. I feel more alive than I have for years.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s too bad. Your family must miss you already. Don\u2019t you miss them?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI do, but if I had stayed I would have made all of them miserable.\u201d Frederick looked skeptical. \u201cI am capable of being a real ass sometimes. My words can be terrible weapons. It\u2019s best if I don\u2019t unleash them on my family.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWill you go back?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSomeday but not for a few years. I have a lot I want to see and a lot I want to do. Then I\u2019ll think about going back.\u201d<\/p>\n

The two men entered the house then. It was a comfortable house that was neat and clean but clearly had a woman\u2019s touch in the decorating. Frederick shrugged as Adam looked at him. \u201cWe made a deal years ago. I get to design and build the stables, paddocks, fences, grooms\u2019 quarters, riding rings, and anything else related to the horses any way I want, paint them any color I want, and so on. The outside of the house is mine to do with as I wish to make it match the rest of the buildings. Matilda gets to do whatever she wishes with the inside of the house. She does like a lot of frilly things.\u201d<\/p>\n

Smiling, Adam sat in a comfortable leather chair in the study when Frederick offered some bourbon, and the two men talked until it was nearly time for dinner. Frederick told Adam that his things were in the guest room at the top of the stairs, and that he could freshen up for dinner. Frederick went into his bedroom to do the same. Adam cleaned up and dressed for dinner finding that he was not overdressed as he worried he might be because Frederick had also donned more formal wear for the occasion.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t dress like this for dinner normally, but with a guest in the house, Matilda will expect it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Shortly before dinner was served, Matilda came into the room because she just had to meet this man who had made her daughter so angry although as Corinne related the story, Matilda couldn\u2019t understand why her daughter was in fact that angry. Adam stood when Matilda entered and bowed his head when introduced. He took her hand and kissed the back of it before releasing it and giving her the full blown Adam grin. All she knew at that point was if she had been Corinne, anger would not have been what she was feeling. Doing her best to keep her composure, she told Adam and her husband that dinner was to be served shortly, and the three headed to the dining room where they found Corinne already seated and waiting for them. Dinner conversation was polite and conventional until Matilda had to ask a question.<\/p>\n

\u201cHave you ever met anyone like my daughter, I mean, any woman like her?\u201d<\/p>\n

Smirking just a little, Adam nodded. \u201cYes, I met a woman of fire once before. I liked her very much once we came to an understanding.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat kind of understanding?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, she had a sharp tongue, she broke my guitar over my brother\u2019s head, and rode off without checking her cinch even though I warned her about that.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, my, what did you do?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBesides spanking her?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou spanked her?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, she needed it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Until then that part of the conversation was between Adam and Matilda. Corinne took offense at the last sentence though. \u201cNo woman needs to be spanked. Only a cretin would think so.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, if a woman acts like a child, speaks without the constraints of adult conversation, and is rude and unruly, she may need a spanking. Margarita did. One can be a woman of fire, and still be mature.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo now you\u2019re calling me immature?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t in fact say that. You did.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou are not being very polite.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m trying to be polite, but the situation is making it very difficult.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo now I\u2019m difficult?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAgain, that is not what I said, but feel free to express any more opinions about yourself. I\u2019ll simply nod if I agree.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou are the most condescending …\u201d<\/p>\n

Frederick put up his hand and forcefully squelched his daughter\u2019s retort with a loud \u201cNo more!\u201d He waited until he was sure Corinne had stopped her tirade. \u201cYou have shown incredibly bad manners with our guest. You should apologize.\u201d<\/p>\n

With fire in her eyes, Corinne did manage to choke out an \u201cI\u2019m sorry.\u201d It didn\u2019t sound genuine however. Adam did apologize for anything that had contributed to the exchange. Dessert was served then and there were no more fireworks.\u00a0\u00a0 After dinner, Frederick wanted to retire to his study, but Adam declined saying he would prefer a chance to sit in the clean night air. Corinne walked out later not knowing he was sitting in the darkness. He didn\u2019t know how to let her know he was there without startling her so he simply made a quiet statement.<\/p>\n

\u201cI love a clear night.\u201d<\/p>\n

Corinne spun around in shock wondering if he had followed her outside. Instead she saw that he was comfortably ensconced in a reclining porch chair with his legs crossed and resting on an ottoman. Seeing her look even in the moonlight, Adam could see that she had been scared.<\/p>\n

\u201cI am sorry that I frightened you. I could tell that you didn\u2019t know I was here, and I didn\u2019t know how to let you know without scaring you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI wasn\u2019t scared.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course not.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAll right, you did surprise me some but that\u2019s not the same as being scared.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course not.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAre you always like this?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHmm, yes, pretty much. I do tend to irritate a lot of people. It\u2019s never made me want to change though so I guess I\u2019ll go on irritating them until I die.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhich could be sooner rather than later.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam started laughing then. She was a spirited woman, and she had a sharp wit. \u201cQuite possibly.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMay I sit?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course. It is your home and not mine.\u201d<\/p>\n

They sat quietly for a time until she asked if he knew the names of the stars. He walked into the yard with her and began pointing to various constellations and naming them. He told her his father had taught them to him. Matilda peeked through the study window and told her husband what she saw.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s a good man, and a good match for her, but he\u2019s leaving in a week. He told me he\u2019s going to New York and Boston before he heads to England. It\u2019s too bad. The two of them could have been good together. She\u2019s not likely to find another like him. Matilda, I worry. What if she never marries?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know. I worry too, but maybe he\u2019ll be good for her so that she\u2019ll start taking an interest in other men. There must be one out there that will marry her and take over this farm.\u201d<\/p>\n

The rest of the week had been fun for Adam and Corinne as they rode horses, talked, argued, and generally enjoyed each other\u2019s company. The night before he left, Adam had stood under the stars with her and kissed her for the first time, but it was to say goodbye. She found it difficult to speak after that kiss and knowing he was leaving the next day. They stood quietly together for a time before going inside to get some sleep. Adam stood on the deck of the ship smiling about their week together. He told himself that there were no regrets but in fact, he did regret not spending more time with her.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 3<\/strong><\/p>\n

For much of the trip past the emerald green land of Ireland, Adam was on deck. The ship sailed close to land to avoid the big waves further out at sea. They were now in waters that were considered reasonably safe so more of the passengers were on deck and enjoying the views. Adam began singing some Irish songs that he had learned many years before and soon some of the crew joined in. The rest of the trip to London was uneventful. Although Adam appeared calm to any who might observe him, inside his heart and soul were in a joyous chorus as he filed away one sight after another. He was surprised to find London so large and dirty as he disembarked from the ship. It was three times larger than New York City as he would find over the next month as he visited every site he could sketching and drawing as he went. Shelley\u2019s words reverberated within him for it was \u201cA Populous and smoky city.\u201d He well accepted too what Samuel Johnson had said of the city: \u201cWhen a man is tired of London, he is tired of life; for there is in London all that life can afford.\u201d He was excited to go out every day from the flat he had leased so that he could learn more.<\/p>\n

Some of what he saw reinforced his beliefs that social inequality threatened democracy much as he had thought the same in New York and in Boston. There were many who lounged against buildings or slept in alleys after nights of heavy drinking. Trying to find a way to survive, women offered themselves to anyone who would have them. The streets were filthy, the waterways badly polluted, and the threat of violent crime was especially threatening at night. Adam stayed in most nights reading and planning the next day\u2019s activities. It was the best route to survival.<\/p>\n

And yet it seemed that more and more came to the great city to find a chance to improve their lives. He heard accents of the Irish especially intermingled with the varieties of English accents, but there were German, French, and other accents as well especially when he traveled to the eastern parts of the city although he spent little time there. The western portions of the city had much more fashionable neighborhoods and nowhere was wealth as flaunted as in those. Adam noted that the social stratification of English society was well represented in London.<\/p>\n

After a month of acting the tourist, Adam decided to do a bit of traveling about England before he thought to head to France. He planned an itinerary that would take him eventually to Leeds. He departed London one month after arriving there and rode by coach to the next town, Luton, where he spent the night. He hoped to call on Lord and Lady Dunsford while he was there but found that they were out of the country. He left a note expressing his regret at missing them, but by the end of the day, he had forgotten that disappointment entirely when he discovered the Luton town hall and St. Mary\u2019s church. Both were beautifully done structures although in completely different styles. He spent several days exploring the church especially and then walked through much of the smaller city before he took the train to the next town.<\/p>\n

In Coventry, Adam discovered a clock and watch industry that rivaled the skill of the more famous Swiss artisans. He purchased four watches intending to send three home to Nevada with his next letter. He was only about one hundred miles from London, and yet it seemed he had passed into a different country. The population was almost exclusively English, the streets were not crowded, and there were many trees and much less of the urban filth that he had expected. It was here that he began to become most interested in castles. He was advised to visit Warwick and the famed castle there on a sandstone bluff at a bend of the River Avon. The river ran below the castle on the east side, and as Adam hiked around the castle walking toward the river, he heard a woman\u2019s screams. He found a disreputable pair accosting a well-dressed young woman and attempting to force her to go with them.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou there, let the woman be.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt none of your affair. Be on your way.\u201d The man pulled a knife then and waved it in what he considered a menacing way. He was a bit put off by the lack of fear in the man he hoped to scare off. Their plan had been to kidnap the young woman and hold her for ransom.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m afraid I am making it my affair, and I\u2019ve told you to let her be.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam was relatively confident in the situation because one thing he had noted of the various criminals in England was that they seemed to rely most on knives and only rarely on guns. He had a knife himself but didn\u2019t plan to take it out unless he was forced to do so. Sadly that is exactly what happened. His opponent seemed shocked at first to see a knife in the hand of the man interfering in his business, but he had to assume that a gentleman, even one with such an odd accent, would not be skilled in its use. He was wrong of course but had no basis for drawing the correct conclusion. He lunged at Adam with his knife and was rewarded with a slash across his knife arm.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, no need to do that. I was only tryin\u2019 to scare ya off. Now ya got me temper up, and you\u2019ll be paying for that.\u201d<\/p>\n

The man lunged again, and was slashed across his arm once more. The second cut was deeper than the first causing him to drop his knife and grab his arm. The other assailant fled and was soon followed by the first man who was grasping his arm in a desperate attempt to staunch the flow of blood. Adam walked to the side of the woman who had been attacked as she watched the two flee.<\/p>\n

\u201cAre you all right?\u201d<\/p>\n

Turning to look at Adam, the woman appraised him thoroughly and then smiled. \u201cYes, I am. Your help is greatly appreciated. I was thinking to rest on the bank here and enjoy the cool breeze before riding home. I never anticipated that I would be attacked here within sight of the castle walls.\u201d There was the sound then of a horse being ridden away. \u201cOh, dear, I hope they have not taken my horse. It is one of my father\u2019s favorites, and he would be most displeased with me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cUnfortunately, those sounds came from the direction where I had left my horse. It is likely they have taken the horse that I rode here.\u201d Offering his elbow to the lady, Adam assisted her up the bank of the river and through the trees to where he had left his horse. It was gone, and his companion couldn\u2019t help but smile.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt appears that not only are you quite good at sending ruffians on their way, but you have provided their transportation as well.\u201d<\/p>\n

Shaking his head, Adam smiled though at her gentle teasing.<\/p>\n

\u201cPlease, if you will, we could ride double on my horse. He\u2019s over this way a bit.\u201d She led him to a small grove of trees where they found her horse happily munching on some grass. The horse was a powerful looking horse that stood much taller than the woman who had ridden him here. \u201cMy, those ruffians have robbed me of my good sense and manners. I should have thanked you profusely and introduced myself at once. I do so appreciate what you have done and the risk that you took to help me. I am Lady Constance Anne of Pembroke. My father, the Baron of Pembroke, will be most grateful for your gallant deed. Please, would you ride with me to my home?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMy name is Adam Cartwright, and I would be most pleased.\u201d<\/p>\n

Lady Constance offered to let Adam sit in the saddle after they of course had to lengthen the stirrups to accommodate his height, and then she reached up for his hand as he took his foot from the stirrup allowing her to use it. She turned and ended up sitting across his lap. It was almost an intimate position especially as she shifted to get more comfortable and pushed back into him. Adam reached around her and used the reins to turn the horse in the direction she had indicated. Within an hour, they arrived at a small stable. Lady Constance had proved to be very inquisitive and had, as they rode, learned much of Adam\u2019s recent history and why he was in England. As Adam helped Lady Constance to dismount, a groomsman came out to take charge of the horse. There was a large stone cottage there and Adam began walking toward it thinking it was her home. She smiled.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Adam, that\u2019s where our groundskeeper lives. My home is this way.\u201d He offered his elbow for their walk and she led him up a well-worn stone path through a copse of trees. When they emerged, he saw that her home was a small square castle. The windows on the first level were very small and placed high, but the windows of the second and third floors were much larger. The castle had water on three sides and a wall that was gradually crumbling away protected the fourth side. He was curious to see a castle that was still occupied as a family dwelling, and his excitement caused him to pick up his pace.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou like castles then?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI have been studying the architecture of England and have found it even more fascinating than I thought it would be, but I have not yet been inside a castle still being used as a residence.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe live on the second and third floors. The first floor is where there are servants\u2019 quarters, the kitchen, a wine cellar, and other storage rooms. It can be quite dark down there. What you cannot see from this side are the second and third floor balconies that are over the moat.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI would love to see those.\u201d<\/p>\n

Smiling, Lady Constance led Adam into her home to meet her parents. She did tell him that she wanted to tell her parents what had happened, but for him to please not mention the knife the ruffian had been carrying because her parents were already too protective in her opinion. That all might have worked out very well except Lady Constance\u2019s mother was exceptionally observant and noticed a few drops of what looked like blood on Adam\u2019s pants leg and shirt sleeve.<\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Cartwright, is that blood? Were you hurt in the altercation?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I\u2019m sorry, but it isn\u2019t my blood.\u201d<\/p>\n

With a severe look toward his daughter, the Baron insisted on the whole story. She shrugged and told Adam to explain what had happened from his point of view. He did downplay the threat as much as possible understanding fully how one could feel parents were being too protective. The Baron said he would be considering what to do about what had happened, but that first, Mr. Cartwright should be shown to a guest room.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I\u2019m sorry, but I have already taken a room in town. I only meant to tour the area and learn about the castles here. I do not mean to impose on your hospitality.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMr. Cartwright, we live by a traditional code of honor here. You have saved my daughter, and you deserve a boon. I shall have someone fetch your things from town and pay for the lost horse. You are welcome to enjoy our hospitality here for the duration of your sojourn. Now, I will have someone show you to a room.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThank you, sir, but I must admit I am not well schooled in the proper form of address for a baron.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, to be honest, those titles do tend to make me think of my father and grandfather. For the duration of your visit here, please call me Robert, and this is my wife, Olivia. Connie may show you to a room now if you would like so that you can freshen up as I\u2019m certain she must be anxious to do by this point.\u201d The Baron\u2019s pointed look at her riding garb strongly suggested that he intended that she change into something more appropriate for a lady to wear when entertaining a guest in their home.<\/p>\n

Connie was wise not to disagree with him then and motioned toward the stairs. She and Adam walked slowly up the staircase as he admired the construction of the building and the craftsmanship in the interior woodwork especially the staircase and the wood framing the massive fireplace. He mentioned that to Connie who had to disagree a bit.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt looks quite nice, but this is such a chilly and damp place much of the time. The fireplace provides warmth if you\u2019re within ten feet of it, but otherwise I\u2019m afraid most of the heat goes up the chimney instead of into the living quarters. The windows look quite nice, but the wind blows right through them. There are so many drafts in here that one can scarcely let a paper lie on a desk for fear it will blow about the room with the slightest breeze outside.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPerhaps there are some modifications that could be made to maintain the authenticity of the structure but improve its functionality.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s funny. You sound a bit like an architect but at least one with a respect for history.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI am an architect. I studied that and engineering and business when I attended college.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou have a degree then?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI completed four years of study in college, yes, but I\u2019m afraid I do not have what traditionalists would consider a proper degree. I studied what I wanted to know.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, you must tell father after dinner. He would be most interested if you have any suggestions that would improve our home without losing any of its historical integrity.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI would be most pleased to do so. That is exactly the kind of thing I would like to try.\u201d<\/p>\n

They had arrived at the door of the guest room, and Connie opened the door for Adam to enter. \u201cI must change now because father expects it, but I do appreciate these riding clothes far more that formal dresses.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI appreciated them as well, my lady.\u201d<\/p>\n

Grinning as she turned to walk to her room, Connie threw back a comment that startled Adam and then made him smile. \u201cI knew you did, my gallant American cowboy. I most certainly knew you did.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 4<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cRobert, your windows are set in masonry. If they were set in a wooden frame, they could be made more secure against the weather.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, wouldn\u2019t the wooden frame have the same problem as the wooden windows?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, we could frame the frame with more wood with caulking underneath where it could not be seen. The frames would look more massive then which is suitable to the style of the rest of the building. There could be a stove in each room as well and the smoke would be piped into the main fireplace of the living area, or into the chimney hidden behind the opposite wall that carries the smoke from the kitchen. Your rooms would be much warmer in poor weather, and it would keep the dampness at bay as well.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDo you have any suggestions for what we could do in warm weather to cool the bedrooms because each has only a single window opening onto a balcony?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, it is rather a simple fix. Because you are on the third floor, putting a transom window above each bedroom door would create a natural airflow from down below. Southern homes in the United States have been doing this for a couple of centuries to naturally cool their homes.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAre there any other suggestions that you have?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThe other suggestions I have are only for purposes of aesthetics. The balconies are a modern addition, and they look it. I would replace them with more massive ones of dark oak in fitting with the style of your castle. The balusters as well as the railing and brackets should be done in more of a classical style with curves that would accent the massive stone of the walls. Doing so would allow the balconies to project about a foot further from the structure allowing chairs to be placed on them if you wished.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat sounds wonderful, and you have proven your knowledge as an architect, but I\u2019m afraid the expense of doing all of that would be prohibitive. The estate does not generate enough income for so many changes.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThe biggest expense would be labor. I am available if you would exchange room and board for my work. Your groundskeeper has already said that he has nearly all of the tools I would need. The next expense would be the stoves so perhaps you would like to get only two to start and we could outfit the master bedroom and Anne\u2019s bedroom? The next project I would suggest would be the windows. The balconies are functional if inappropriate to the style of the building, but they should be done last. They will also take the most time.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou would work with your hands yourself and do all of this?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI would be happy to do so. I would need a few days each week to travel and visit other castles and cathedrals or any other unique structures. Otherwise, I would be available to work.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHow long do you estimate this would take?\u201d<\/p>\n

Because he had already consulted with the head groundskeeper and his assistant, Adam was ready with an answer for Robert. \u201cI think that if Oliver and Basil would be available to help me as needed, the work could be done in a year. I would have to sit down with you and determine your priorities as to which tasks we would tackle first.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy are you so interested in doing this? It seems a man with your education would leave the work to hired men.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m thinking of writing a book on the architecture of castles, and the theme could be how to refurbish and modernize them and keep them authentic. I have many sketches already, but this job would give me first hand knowledge that I could use. I would have calculations and measurements to use as examples.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI can\u2019t imagine that such a book would be particularly popular.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt would be with European architects, and it would be something lasting that I could create. The castle renovations here would also be something concrete that I would have accomplished on my own.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI have one caveat to add to the understanding we have reached. When you go on your sojourns to visit other castles and to see some of the grand buildings such as cathedrals, I would like you to take Connie with you. You have proven yourself an able bodyguard, and she should not be traveling about unescorted. She would bristle if I hired a man to do it, but if you would do it, I\u2019m quite sure she would accept the arrangement.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam hesitated before answering. Connie had mentioned to him that she had lobbied her father for just such an arrangement the night before. She had warned him not to agree to readily for if he seemed too eager to do it, her father might reconsider the proposition. \u201cI don\u2019t know. There are times when I plan to be gone for two or three days. Would it be seemly for her to be in my company under such circumstances?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cCertainly. She would have her room and you would have your room if any overnight accommodations were to be necessary. It would not be unusual for a young lady and her bodyguard to stay in the same establishment and eat their meals together. She would be much safer that way.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThen I accept the caveat. I need to spend some time measuring and drawing so that I can get started on producing the items I will need.\u201d<\/p>\n

Over the next few days, Adam did a number of drawings of the rooms with the improvements. Each was submitted to Robert for his approval. Four stoves were ordered as well as the stovepipes necessary to install each one. Robert had decided that he would outfit four bedrooms before the windows were reinstalled. Adam continued to take his meals with the family. Robert considered him an artisan and not of the class to spend a year at their dining table and living in a guest room, but he had offered his hospitality and could hardly renege on it at this point. He would have to find a suitable excuse if any of his class chose to comment on the situation.<\/p>\n

Because he needed to go to town for paper for drawing and writing, Adam asked Connie if she would like to go. In just their limited conversations to this point, he was well aware of how restricted she felt because her father would not allow her to go anywhere unescorted. The day was sunny and mild so it would be a good day to take a shopping trip. As they drove to town in a carriage, Connie pointed out features of the countryside and explained some of the history of the area.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou know a lot about your home. Not many people seem to be so interested in the history of their immediate environment.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, I study it, history, I mean. Father says that is why I think I\u2019m always right. He said people who study history are like that. I have a lot of books on the history of England. You would be welcome to read any that you wish. I have them in my bedroom.\u201d She fluttered her eyes mimicking a coquettish look, and that made Adam laugh.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, I can picture it now when your father finds us in your bedroom. Baron, I\u2019m sorry, but she wanted to show me her books. Do you think he would believe that?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe might. You haven\u2019t even kissed me so how could anyone suspect anything between us at this point?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAt this point?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, I\u2019m still hoping you will kiss me at some point, but I can be patient when I need to be patient.\u201d<\/p>\n

Pulling back on the reins, Adam halted the carriage to look at Connie. \u201cI get the feeling that your father would not be happy hearing you say that.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe that\u2019s one of the reasons I want to kiss you. Of course, it doesn\u2019t hurt that you were my knight in shining armor, and that you sleep across the hall from me so my dreams are filled with you.\u201d Laughing gently then at his look, Connie had to tease him a bit. \u201cNow don\u2019t look so worried. I\u2019m not going to ravish you and steal your innocence away. Oh, if you take too long deciding when to kiss me, I might, but for now, I can wait.\u201d<\/p>\n

Shaking his head, Adam had to smile at her audacity. At least if he did move to kiss her, he wouldn\u2019t have that perennial fear of rejection. That sobered him a bit as he thought back to his failed relationships. Connie saw the very slight change in his demeanor and slipped her arm through his elbow to sit closer to him.<\/p>\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t mean to upset you. I only thought to tell you that I like you very much. I thought we were close enough already that I could be completely honest with you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou didn\u2019t upset me with anything you said, and I do value your honesty. That\u2019s important to me too. It\u2019s just that relationships with women haven\u2019t worked out well for me in the past. I had thought I would only look forward and never back, but I\u2019m afraid those demons are not so easily banished.\u201d<\/p>\n

Connie looked up at him then and touched his cheek. \u201cI\u2019m sorry you have had such sadness.\u201d<\/p>\n

That gentle touch and genuine emotion broke the last of Adam\u2019s reserve. He leaned down to kiss her and gently brushed his lips across hers as he wrapped his arms around her pulling her close. There was no resistance as she relaxed into his embrace. He probed her lips with his tongue and she opened to him. The kiss was passionate but controlled for they were stopped on a public road. Hearing some noise, they broke the kiss as another conveyance came around the curve in the road. Adam tipped his hat to the other driver who smiled and did the same. Connie giggled a bit when the other vehicle had gone.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat could have ended your visit here very quickly. He owns the shop that sold the materials to my father for the renovations. I\u2019m sure he would have mentioned something if he had seen anything. We shall have to be very careful.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHow upset would your father be if he found you kissing a commoner?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cExceptionally. He already thinks that you do not know your place, but because you are an American, he is allowing you some leeway, and of course, he needs your help with our home.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo you must marry a proper gentleman and produce an heir?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, that\u2019s not it. My brother is married and his son will follow him in succession.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou have a brother?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, he is in army service. He will come home once that is completed. His wife and child live with her parents now. It is probably her family that concerns my father most at the moment. They would be shocked to find you staying with us for an extended period especially as you work with your hands.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDoesn\u2019t anyone with wealth do any actual work here?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, heavens, no. That\u2019s what solicitors and factotums are for. Father gives the orders, and the work gets done. Does your father work as you do?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot so much any more. He has a lot of paperwork to do with the Ponderosa.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s a Ponderosa?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s our ranch. We have about a thousand square miles of Nevada with herds of cattle, horse breeding operations, timber cutting, and a lumber mill as well as investments in a number of silver and gold mines.\u201d At Connie\u2019s incredulous look, Adam had to smirk. \u201cYou didn\u2019t think I needed this job, did you?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m rather embarrassed to admit, I did. My father certainly thinks so. He thinks that he is repaying his debt of honor to you by employing you. Why did you accept the job if it isn\u2019t for the support you receive.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI get to live in a castle, and I get to use my education. I also get a significant amount of information to write a book about castles.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut you work with your hands. I thought that you said you didn\u2019t like working on your father\u2019s ranch?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRiding herd, branding, fixing fences, and breaking horses definitely lost its appeal after so many years of it. I felt I was wasting my life doing what any cowboy would do for thirty dollars a month. I felt most needed and fulfilled when I was negotiating contracts or working on investments, but in between there was a lot of dreary work.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut you must be a wealthy man?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI guess my family is wealthy, but that doesn\u2019t mean we think we shouldn\u2019t work. We hope to leave a heritage for the next generation and would expect them to leave something for their children and grandchildren as well.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut you said that none of you are married. From where will this next generation come?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJoe\u2019s young enough yet, and Hoss certainly would be a great father if he could just pick the right woman for him.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd you?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI guess, at this point, I am the prodigal son.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHardly, but we should get going. My father will definitely be suspicious if we do not return before dinner.\u201d For the rest of the day, Connie was very quiet as she observed Adam and thought about all that he had said.<\/p>\n

As they neared her home, Adam had a proposition. \u201cTomorrow, I\u2019m going to Stratford-upon-Avon. I had intended to head that way after I took a good look at Warwick Castle, but I had to rescue a beautiful lady instead. Would you like to accompany me there?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI most certainly would, but they are holding a smaller version of the original Shakespeare Jubilee there in a month. They will hold a big one in four years because it will be the one hundredth anniversary of the original one. This will be small but just as well done so perhaps next month would be a better time to visit there. Kenilworth Castle ruins would be a wonderful sight for you to see instead though. It was one of the largest castles built in all of England and it is not too far from here. Even the ruins there are impressive.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYour father won\u2019t mind you traveling with me?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe should invite Mother to come with us. She likes to visit that castle ruin too, and that would alleviate Father\u2019s suspicions of your intentions if we invite Mother to come with us on occasion.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou are a bit of a rebel but devious about hiding it, aren\u2019t you?\u201d<\/p>\n

All Connie could do in response to that was to smile.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 5\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cIt is not proper for you to be traipsing about the countryside with this man. You and he are of different classes. When he was your escort for safety, that was acceptable, but I have heard rumors that the two of you have been seen to be too close for that type of relationship. You know how people watch us and spread gossip about us. How could you be so flagrantly irresponsible?\u201d Robert was incensed at his daughter\u2019s behavior after hearing from his cousin who had heard from another cousin that his daughter and Adam Cartwright had hugged when touring the ruins of Pontrefact Castle. He had been reluctant to let her go on another jaunt with the man who was working for him, but she had pleaded with him, and he had relented against his better judgment. Now there was gossip, and Robert didn\u2019t care whether it was true or not. A dalliance with a commoner was not unheard of in his circles, but to be so indiscreet as to allow that to become rumor and gossip was intolerable.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe talk and sometimes when we walk, Adam takes my arm as any gentleman would. You can imagine that walking about castle ruins is not the easiest thing to do. We talked about it for weeks before going there. Shakespeare wrote about it, which intrigued Adam, and I have to admit that his curiosity has piqued my interest in the history of castles again. He has quite a bit of research for his book already.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHis book, pshaw. He\u2019s no more an author than he is a proper gentleman.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFather, he and his family own a thousand square miles of land, herds of cattle and horses, as well as any number of businesses. He is part of a wealthy family. I have told you this many times. Why can\u2019t you believe it?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAny man with such resources would not stoop to accept a job renovating a castle for room and board. He is dishonest if he has convinced you otherwise. Anyone with that kind of property and investments would not work with his hands like any commoner.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe have one more trip already planned. We want to go see Rochester Castle. Adam has met Charles Dickens who told him about it. Mr. Dickens was very intrigued by it, and now Adam is as well.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou believe him when he says he met Mr. Dickens in the wilds of America?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI do. He has corresponded with him while he was here. I saw one of the letters he received from him.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat doesn\u2019t mean anything necessarily, but I suppose he might have met him at some point. I still refuse to believe they could be friends. Now about that castle visit, why is it so important?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThere is quite a lot of history with that castle, and I was going to explain that to Adam as he sketched it. Please, just one more trip?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cVery well, but you must be discreet. I will have no more embarrassment from your dalliance with this man. You must be thinking of a proper marriage to one of your suitors.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFather, none have called on me in months. They are all old men who want a young wife to show off to their friends.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThey are not much older than Mr. Cartwright, and you find him attractive enough, it seems.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s younger in so many ways than those men. He\u2019s muscular and masculine in every way.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPlease, do not speak like that with me. It isn\u2019t proper.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cVery well. We will be leaving quite early tomorrow morning. Adam will have the carriage packed and ready to go as soon as it is light enough to travel.\u201d<\/p>\n

Robert had no fear that Adam would hear them. A month earlier, Robert had maneuvered Adam out of the castle and into the cottage by having some relatives visit. On pretense of needing the guest rooms, Robert asked Adam to move his things to the cottage temporarily. Of course, he had not found occasion to ask him to move them back into the castle. Adam was only at the castle now to work on the balconies. He had finished installing the stoves and transom windows, and had reset the windows on the second and third floors as he had said he would. Robert had to admit he was a skilled and hard-working man who had accomplished more in the past seven months than most workmen would have done in a year or more.\u00a0\u00a0 The castle was warmer and less drafty than it had ever been, but as soon as Adam finished the balconies, Robert intended to pay him a fair amount to leave.<\/p>\n

For months, Adam and his daughter had been touring castles and had attended the Shakespeare Jubilee celebration as well as some fairs. Robert knew that Adam made his daughter happy, but there were so many things that were far more important than her happiness. Her brother would be home in a few months, and there was a chance that one of them would be tapped for the House of Lords. One of the members was aged and without any direct heir. It had been a matter of intrigue among those eligible to take his place, but Robert had successfully lobbied a number of men who would benefit from the Baron or his son taking that spot. There could be no unsavory gossip for it could ruin their chances of securing that spot. He and Olivia had suspected that something had happened between Adam and Connie months earlier when they had taken an overnight trip to Framlingham Castle in Suffolk. Until then it had been day trips to the many small castles and castle ruins in the Midlands. They had not thought anything unusual about the two making those short trips, but apparently a strong relationship was developing between the two and Robert meant to end it, but he did want his home renovated first. Many of his peers were talking about the changes he had made and envied him for it.<\/p>\n

Unknown to Connie\u2019s parents, she and Adam had become close long before anyone else was aware of it. Connie had longed for a more intimate relationship than kisses and hugs, but there was no opportunity for them to do any more than that. She wondered what would happen when Adam finished the castle renovations and was fairly certain that Adam would leave at that point. Until then, she intended to enjoy every minute that she could spend with him. As she walked down the path to the stone cottage to let Adam know they could go to Rochester Castle, Connie reminisced about the time she had been able to spend with Adam. The day trips to the nearby castles had given them time to talk and get to know one another. Adam was very careful never to kiss her or hug her when there were people around. Usually they tried to find a secluded spot for a picnic, and it would be there that he would wrap his arms around her and kiss her passionately. He showed the utmost restraint and there were times when she fervently wished he wouldn\u2019t. The trip to Suffolk with a stay at an inn would be the first time that there might be something more than kissing, hugging, and touching. She hoped so very much even though she had no experience with a man other than what she had already done with Adam, but he stirred longings in her that she didn\u2019t understand but wanted very much to satisfy. When they had been at Pontrefact, she had been bolder with him than she had ever been.<\/p>\n

\u201cSweetheart, you have to stop doing that. When you brush against me or push up against me, it makes it very difficult for me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat would you like me to do then?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJust asking a question like that does things to me, and you know it too. Why are you teasing me so much today.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe it\u2019s not teasing. Maybe I would like to do more with you. You always say no, and then you pull away from me. Don\u2019t you want to?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI want to more than you could ever know, but it would be wrong unless there was some chance that we could be together. You deserve a lover who will be by your side and not one who is only here temporarily.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt could be more permanent.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou know that\u2019s not true. I\u2019ll be leaving here in a few months. Someday, I\u2019ll be going back home to Nevada. Your family not only would never allow you to be with me, they would absolutely forbid you to leave the country. We can have a romance but no more.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut I think I\u2019m falling in love with you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHave you ever been in love before?\u201d Connie dropped her head. She hated it when his years of experience made her feel like a schoolgirl. She was a woman, and she knew what she wanted, but it was as if he could read her mind. \u201cRight now, you think you want to be with me, and that any price is acceptable. That\u2019s not right, and you\u2019ll know it someday. Your family is important to you, and you could never stay away from them, or if you did, you would come to hate the man who took you away from them.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI could never hate you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI would like to think that\u2019s true, but I\u2019m afraid that there\u2019s too much difference between us to allow a relationship to be sustained.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWouldn\u2019t you fight for me?\u201d<\/p>\n

Leaning back on an elbow that day, Adam looked at Connie and knew that there was so much of the world she didn\u2019t understand despite her rather encyclopedic knowledge of English history. \u201cOnce my brother Hoss and I were accosted by three men who had knives and demanded we turn over our wallets. We were in San Francisco and headed to the theater at the time.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat did you do? Did you have a knife and fight them like you did those people who attacked me?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I drew a pistol that I was wearing inside my jacket and told them to drop their knives. They did, and my brother Hoss told them that it\u2019s an old rule: don\u2019t bring a knife to a gunfight.\u201d<\/p>\n

Connie chuckled but then asked why he had told that story.<\/p>\n

\u201cHere in England, your father has the pistols and I have a knife. I could never win a fight if it ever came to that.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou could try.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNow you want me to be the tragic hero and die for my beloved?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m your beloved?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI do care for you a great deal, but I\u2019m sorry that I will not die for your hand. You knew from the start, as I did, that we were only going to have some pleasant times together, and then it would be over.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIf I had a baby, they\u2019d have to let us be together.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAre you sure? Is that a risk you would be willing to take? Remember that you would be risking an innocent life too. No, that\u2019s not an option. Please, now can we finish our walk around the ruins, and then I would like some time to sketch them.\u201d<\/p>\n

Connie had nodded in agreement, but since then, she had argued with herself back and forth over that very issue. She still had not made up her mind, but she hoped that with two days, and some privacy in Suffolk, they could come to a decision. She had one other option she was going to ask Adam to consider, but she couldn\u2019t tell him until they were in Suffolk. She couldn\u2019t take a chance at being overheard. They had made plans to go to Stonehenge too in a few weeks, but Connie wondered if they would be able to do that. If they could go, it would present them with another option.<\/p>\n

When she reached the stone cottage, she was stopped in her tracks by what she saw. The day was warm, and Adam was working at creating the balusters for the balconies. He had removed his shirt, and the sweat made his skin glisten. She had not seen him like that before, and it took her breath away. She watched him work for a time as the muscles worked beneath the skin and kept her eyes focused on his chest, arms, and back as he worked and moved back and forth.<\/p>\n

With his head still down and eyes focused on his work, Adam startled her when he spoke. \u201cAre you going to stand there staring at me or come over here to talk with me?\u201d She smiled then knowing that some of what she had seen was undoubtedly Adam showing off a bit for her. He liked to do that on occasion, and she liked it when he did.<\/p>\n

\u201cI was simply admiring the scenery.\u201d She smirked and he looked at her with a grin. \u201cFather gave me quite a lecture about our behavior. It seems we were seen being too friendly when we were at Pontrefact.\u201d Adam looked up quizzically. \u201cNo, they only saw you take my arm and apparently thought it was too much contact for my escort. We were very discreet where we had our picnic. I\u2019m sure no one saw us kissing. If they had, Father would have me locked in my room right now, and he might be chasing you down with those guns you like to talk about.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo the trip to Suffolk is still all right?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, but we must be extremely discreet. It wouldn\u2019t surprise me if Father had someone watching us now.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPerhaps we should keep our distance from each other. Any contact puts a lot at risk.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know. I feel like a bird in a cage.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd your father looks at me as if I\u2019m the cat that\u2019s after his bird. We can still talk and enjoy being together.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, when we\u2019re in Suffolk, and have some privacy, we should talk.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe can talk, but I don\u2019t think there\u2019s a likelihood that we\u2019re going to find a solution to this dilemma. Sometimes you have to accept what you cannot change.\u201d Connie nodded. There didn\u2019t seem to be a solution. She supposed they would have a pleasant enough time while he was still there, but she could think of no way to get him to stay longer nor for any way for her father to accept him. They did make the trip to Suffolk, but were very discreet. Neither wanted to jeopardize the time that they had left together. However they did enjoy a great laugh when they were standing in the keep of Rochester Castle as Adam admired the curtain wall protectively enclosing the entire stone castle.<\/p>\n

\u201cLots of fairs and festivals are held on this green, and probably will be for hundreds of years more.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s a lot of damage here. Was this castle under siege a lot?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, it is one of the castles that was most useful for protecting London from attack, but it has also been used by those who would rebel against a king. The worst damage was done by King John after he signed the Magna Carta. He was supposed to get this castle for the crown as part of that agreement, but some of the nobles reneged, supplied themselves well, and barricaded themselves in here. He tried to tunnel under the walls to collapse them but it didn\u2019t work. Finally, he used forty pigs to win.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cForty pigs?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, he used the fat of forty pigs to start an extremely hot fire which downed one of the towers of the keep. However, the rebels didn\u2019t quite give up then but used the other side to continue their resistance. But his assault had robbed them of a lot of their supplies so eventually they had to give up. He only had the leader executed, but he spared the lives of all of the others. Quite magnanimous actually.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam laughed then at the whole story but especially at the comical way Connie had told the story. She joined in. Both of them were very comfortable in each other\u2019s company. Connie sat on a large stone next to Adam who had taken out papers for sketching. \u201cI like these curtain walls. The one here and the one at Framlingham are very impressive. I want to do some sketches here before we leave.\u201d They sat as close as they could without violating rules of propriety. They only did that when they were sure there was no one watching. Adam was becoming more and more uncomfortable with the situation, but he couldn\u2019t think of any way to improve it.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 6<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cDear, if I could do something to help you, I would. I would have done almost anything to marry for love instead of solidifying family connections and bringing political and economic gain to our families, but my parents insisted that I marry Robert. He has been a kind and thoughtful husband.\u201d Olivia had been going on some of the day trips to visit castles. They had been to Seckington Castle as well as a longer trip to Tutbury Castle where they were forced to take rooms in a nearby town when the weather turned stormy. On this trip, they were at Tamworth Castle, and this was probably the final trip they would take together as Adam was putting the finishing touches on the balconies and would soon be finished with the renovations. As she got to know Adam, and saw how happy her daughter was while in his company, she hoped there could be a way to allow them to be together, but like them, she could think of no way to convince Robert that is was acceptable. She had heard Connie telling Adam about how haunted this particular castle was said to be, and then she had heard Connie say that she wished they could keep visiting castles so that she would be able to see him even after he left. The catch in Connie\u2019s voice had been enough to confirm to her mother how much Connie wanted to be with Adam.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou know how we feel then, Mother?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, I think anyone who knows you is well aware of your feelings for Adam. He guards his feelings so much better, but he has a look in his eyes when he looks at you that says that he cares as well.\u201d Deciding to be direct because there was no one close by who could overhear, and she did want to know, Olivia had to ask. \u201cDo you love my daughter, Adam?\u201d<\/p>\n

Taken aback by the unusually direct question from Olivia who had always seemed so reserved, Adam did answer honestly. \u201cI care for your daughter a great deal. I\u2019m not sure if I love her enough to ask her to go with me though. I\u2019ve told her this. She would miss her family too much if she severed ties with you by leaving with me over her father\u2019s objections. She would resent me for it and eventually hate me for it. It is unsavory to think of running away as a way to start a life together. Unless there is some way to convince Robert that we could be together, I think that I will be leaving within a month.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhere will you go?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI still have a few buildings I would like to see. The Priory at Dunstable, the Tower of London, and Dover Castle are on my wish list yet. I\u2019m nearly done with my book, and I hope to meet with publishers in London to see if there is any interest in it. Then I plan to cross the Channel to France. I think that I will stay in Calais for a time before going to Paris.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou could leave with this unresolved?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOlivia, if there was a way to resolve it, I would stay until it was settled. As it is, I am only prolonging the inevitable by staying, but I promised to finish the renovations, and I will. I told Connie that sometimes you have to accept what you cannot change.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s true. Did you know that Robert is planning a large party as soon as you are gone? He wants to show off the renovations and celebrate his place in the House of Lords, but he won\u2019t do it while you\u2019re still here. I think he fears that someone else will see your work and want to have you renovate their castle and keep you here longer.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI have no interest in becoming a professional castle renovator. I have lived in a castle, learned about castles, and now I\u2019m ready to move on to other goals.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cGetting married is not one of your goals then?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt could be, but I haven\u2019t done well in that regard. I\u2019m not going to count on it. Just like here, it has never worked out, and it isn\u2019t going to work out here either, is it?\u201d<\/p>\n

Quietly listening as Olivia and Adam talked, Connie had tears in her eyes. She knew too that it was unlikely that her father would ever relent, and although she was a bit rebellious, Adam was correct. She believed that she could not turn her back on her family and never see them again. The rest of the time spent in Warwickshire was bittersweet. Adam was proud of his accomplishment and felt gratified to have been able to use his education so well. The castle looked good inside and out, and it was far more comfortable for living.<\/p>\n

At the end of the month, Adam bid the family goodbye and headed for London. He and Connie had said very little as they parted, and he kissed her even though her father was watching. He had refused the payment that the Baron had offered preferring instead to honor the original agreement. The Baron wasn\u2019t happy about that, but he had been surprised.<\/p>\n

Once Adam found a place to stay in London, he spent some time there meeting with publishers and editing his book as per their instructions. On a whim, he had added a tongue-in-cheek chapter at the end of the book with the premise that if a castle was haunted, as many were reported to be, occasional tours for tourists could generate revenue to pay for renovations and upkeep. The publishers liked that chapter so much that they wanted to serialize it in one of the major newspapers. That meant that Adam was in London even longer than he had expected and not only saw the Tower of London, but got to visit a number of other buildings that he had missed on his first visit. The arrangements for publication could not be finalized, but the publishers said they would let him know as soon as they could. Adam promised to send a forwarding address when he had one.<\/p>\n

Trying to write without giving too much away of his inner turmoil, Adam had also written and posted his last letter from England to his family letting them know he was soon going to be on the move again. As he stood on the cliffs of Dover the day before he was scheduled to leave England, he reminisced about his travels to that point. He had been very happy to learn that his purchase of thoroughbreds and quarter horses had led to a major horse breeding operation on the Ponderosa. Joe had even written him a letter telling him all that he had done and thanking Adam for the horses and the idea. Adam smiled as he thought about that. One of the reasons for the horses had been to do something that would let Joe know that Adam still thought of his family and the Ponderosa and that he loved both. He smiled too knowing that the Ponderosa had a full time foreman although with the improbable name of Candy. Hoss had been very enthusiastic in his letters talking about how well that was working. As pleasant as those memories were though, Adam\u2019s smile faded as he thought about the two women he had left behind already. He wondered if he would ever find a woman who would go with him to Nevada when he was ready to go home. From letters he had received, it seemed his brothers were still no closer to finding wives either, but both still seemed very happy with their lives. By the time, Adam was settling into a rented flat in Calais, his family received his letter.<\/p>\n

Leaning back in his red leather chair, Ben read Adam\u2019s letter. He knew his younger sons would be happy to hear that another letter had arrived, but they would probably be less happy to know that Adam was continuing on his journey and probably was already in France. It would likely be some time before they could communicate with him again. At that point, Ben had no way of knowing that Adam would not receive any of the letters they sent after this point in time as he moved before any letter could catch him. Many changes would occur on the Ponderosa to surprise him when he did return. A short time later, Candy walked in with Hoss and Joe. Candy was living in the main house now, and Ben felt like he had another son again. He read the letter from Adam and the four of them discussed what they had learned.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell you must be so proud to have a son who has lived in a castle and written a book.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, Candy, Pa\u2019s proud of all of us, aren\u2019t you, Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, Joseph, I\u2019m proud of all of you, but keep your feet off the table.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss was quiet though until Ben asked him what he was thinking. \u201cPa, don\u2019t it seem like maybe that gal was more important to Adam than just being the daughter of the man he was working for? I mean, he talked in letters about how the two of them were touring castles and went to that Stonehenge place, and about how they talked about things, and that she knew all about history and such. Then all of a sudden, he\u2019s leaving and there ain\u2019t nary a word about her at all. It\u2019s like ifn he didn\u2019t mention her, we wouldn\u2019t think about her.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, I had the same feeling. Something was missing in this letter with no mention of her. It was so businesslike and not at all as joyful as I would have expected considering his accomplishments.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYa think his heart done got broken again?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI wouldn\u2019t be surprised. If he gave his heart to a member of the nobility, then he must have known it could never work out for him.\u201d Ben sat silently and was a bit morose. Joe decided a change of topic was in order.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, speaking of ladies, I met a new gal in town. She agreed to go with me to the dance on Saturday. Hoss, you going? Candy, how about you?\u201d<\/p>\n

Discussion turned to the dance then, but Ben and his sons couldn\u2019t help worrying a bit about Adam and what he was doing. He was however not as heartbroken as they feared. He was spending his days in Calais drawing. This time, it wasn\u2019t castles or cathedrals. He was sitting up on a hill and drawing pastoral scenes. He had spent weeks sketching boats in the harbor at Calais and then people in the streets. He wanted a broader perspective than what he had been getting and thought that drawing these scenes would help him. As he sketched on one sunny day, he heard someone walk up behind him. He continued to draw until he was satisfied that he had captured the scene as well as he wanted.<\/p>\n

\u201cMadame, are you going to talk with me or only look over my shoulder as I work? Your child must be getting very curious as to why you do not speak to me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHow did you know?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI heard you walk up, and your tread and that of your child told me.\u201d Adam turned then and was surprised at the beauty of the woman who had stood there watching him draw. \u201cI hope I did not offend.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot at all, monsieur, but I am surprised at your French. It has a distinctive accent that I cannot place.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cProbably because it is a product of spending years in Boston, living in Nevada, and then having a sojourn in England for over a year as well as learning French from a professor who had spent his entire life in New England. I fear my Latin and my Greek would have the same inexplicable accent.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou do speak very well then for an American.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThank you. I believe the people of Calais are responsible for that. I have been practicing on them since I arrived. They have been most helpful in correcting my errors.\u201d<\/p>\n

Laughing lightly, she had a comment for that. \u201cAnd probably a look of disdain as they corrected the ignorant American.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, they do look a bit haughty when I misspeak. Perhaps you would be willing to give me a few lessons. I seem to have difficulties in restaurants more than anywhere else. If you and your son would consent to have lunch with me then you could give me some instruction, if your husband allows.\u201d<\/p>\n

She suddenly looked a bit sad. \u201cMy husband died years ago. Politics is a horrible thing.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m so sorry. I did not mean to bring up unpleasant memories especially with your son here.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJean does not remember his father. It was shortly after he was born. He is probably the reason I\u2019m alive. I would not travel with my husband when Jean was so small so I was not with him when he was arrested, and I could not go to him when he was in prison for fear they would arrest me, and then who would Jean have. It was a terrible time. We live here now as quietly as we can and make no mention of politics.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt must be very difficult for the two of you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe do well enough. I write books for children to read. Amazingly, my best markets are England and America. Perhaps you could give me some instruction in English. Sometimes my publishers are a bit dismayed at my choice of words.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo you and your son will have lunch with me?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe would be happy to do so, but first I must know your name. I am Helga Adelie Abelle de Verennes.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHelga?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMy mother is German and a very stubborn woman. She married a French man and has lived in France all of her married life, but she would not give up everything. So, I am Helga.\u201d<\/p>\n

Smiling at her directness and her story, Adam introduced himself. As Helga took her son\u2019s hand, they walked down the hill and into the small village that was near Calais. As they talked and found a restaurant, Helga asked Adam if he was interested in illustrating her books especially her latest one that was about a boy getting a pony for his birthday and then having to learn to care for it even when it was ill or the weather was unpleasant.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo it is a book about love and responsibility. I think I could do that for you if your publishers accept it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMy publishers are very accommodating. When one makes money for a company, they are always accommodating.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, I have found that to be true.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou have books published then?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, but I have a book about to be published, and they seem quite sure it will make money for them. They plan to serialize the last chapter to get people to buy the book although the last chapter is not representative of the whole.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou find that to be a problem?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI wasn\u2019t thinking that way at first because I was so proud and happy to have them accept my book for publication, but now I have doubts that it was all ethical. There is nothing I can do about it though for I signed the contracts to let them proceed. I have to go back at some point to meet with them to finalize things, but now it seems it would be unethical to renege on my earlier agreement after they have put in such effort on my behalf.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAn ethical dilemma, no?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAn ethical dilemma, yes. It appears that I am destined to be faced with dilemmas.\u201d<\/p>\n

Very thoughtful for a time as she ate and made sure Jean was eating, Helga finally had her thoughts coalesce and looked at Adam across the table from her and Jean. \u201cDid you love her?\u201d<\/p>\n

Caught off guard and quite surprised that she had correctly surmised that from the little that he had said, Adam had to be honest with her. \u201cI could have been, but from the start, I knew that it was probably hopeless, and I didn\u2019t want to let myself be ensnared like that.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo you have had other romances that ended poorly?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHave you been reading my journals? You know so much about me it seems in only a short time. I fear my innermost secrets will be yours before we finish dinner.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut this is lunch. Surely your French is better than that.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt is. I was hoping that I could interest you in dinner as well. Jean, of course, should come along. He is very quiet, isn\u2019t he?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe is always with me or with my parents. He doesn\u2019t know many other people so this is somewhat of a strain for him. He will be fine as he gets to know you. And I would enjoy having dinner with you, but Jean can stay with my parents. I think that dinner would keep him up too late. He likes to go to bed by eight.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know where you live. Shall I meet you at a restaurant?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI live in the second floor apartment of my parents\u2019 home. You can walk with us there and meet my parents. I\u2019m afraid they will not think it proper for us to have a business dinner if they have not yet met you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cA business dinner?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, you have agreed to be my illustrator, have you not, and do we not have business with each other?\u201d<\/p>\n

Smiling, Adam nodded. She was going to be an interesting woman to know.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 7<\/strong><\/p>\n

As Adam and Helga had dinner and then spent a lot of time together over the next few months, she managed to get him to tell her of his time in England and some of his life in America. She said her life was so boring compared to his. As they worked in her apartment one day as she described sections of her book that she wanted drawings to illustrate certain scenes, Adam asked her about her past and her dreams.<\/p>\n

\u201cI once had a dream that I would travel the world and see America and China. Now, I live on the coast of France and see ships sailing away knowing I will never be on any of them.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy not? You\u2019re still a young woman.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI am a young woman with a son. I cannot do anything to jeopardize his safety. I would not risk his life on the ocean or taking him to a strange land and face unknown dangers. Here I know I can keep him safe. I cannot fathom that your father took you as an infant to travel away from all that was safe and then took a small child on a harrowing trip into the wilderness.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt was my life, and I didn\u2019t find it so harrowing until Inger was killed. But even then there was Hoss, and I cannot imagine life without Hoss in it.\u201d Then Adam had to tell her about his father\u2019s three wives and their tragic deaths as well as about his two brothers. \u201cI try to be prepared, and I like to plan ahead, but sometimes, it seems things happen randomly that no one could ever predict.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo what is your plan now?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThis minute or over the next months and years?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cEither or both.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI want to see the cathedrals of Paris and the beaches of the south of France before I go to Italy where I would like to tour the cities. Then I suppose I might head home. That will be some time from now so I\u2019m not certain if I will go directly home or if there will be other places I want to see first.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cChina?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt would be interesting, but I probably won\u2019t go there. It never held the allure that Europe held.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou must be very careful when you are in Paris. Our leader has been relaxing the rules, but there is still much turmoil, and there is always the threat now of another war with Prussia. You wouldn\u2019t want to be here then. You could be conscripted.\u201d<\/p>\n

Laughing, Adam sat down beside her and began to spread his sketches and drawings out on the table. \u201cAt the first hint of trouble, I shall run away like a scared dog with my tail between my legs.\u201d<\/p>\n

Helga shook her head. \u201cI can never picture you doing that even if it was the smart thing to do. You would do what you thought was right no matter the consequences. That\u2019s life, is it not?\u201d<\/p>\n

Leaning toward her, Adam watched to see if she would pull away. She didn\u2019t and in fact seemed to lean toward him if only fractionally. He leaned down more and kissed her softly. \u201cAs to my plans this minute, that was it. I\u2019ve wanted to kiss those lips from the moment I saw them.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI have a confession. I wanted you to kiss them.\u201d Helga smiled as Adam wrapped his arms around her and kissed her more deeply and much longer. It might have led to more except they heard the thundering of two five-year-old feet on the stairs, and Jean rushed through the door and stopped still seeing his mother in Adam\u2019s arms. Helga was a bit nervous about how Jean would react seeing his mother kiss a man. He had never seen that before.<\/p>\n

\u201cMama?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, Jean.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cGrandmama wants to know if Adam is staying for dinner.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, he is, and he has brought a basket of food to share with us. It\u2019s by the door there.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, good, because she said if he was staying, she would have to go to the market. Now I can keep drawing, and she will fix dinner. Bye, Mama, and bye, Adam.\u201d Jean picked up the basket, turned, and then they heard him clomping down the steps.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, that went better than expected.\u201d Adam\u2019s comment had Helga shaking her head and smiling.<\/p>\n

\u201cOne never knows with Jean. He is very bright but so unpredictable. I never know what he will say, but this time, I\u2019m pleased. He likes you and he doesn\u2019t mind sharing me with you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat do you think of my plans?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell I liked that last plan very much, but you mustn\u2019t do that where anyone in town would see. As for the other plans, I worry about you traveling into Paris and into those Italian provinces. There is so much politics always that it is not safe, but one never knows who the enemy is until too late.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou can\u2019t be safe all the time. There are unpredictable things that can happen. All we can do is try to be ready for them when they do happen. And why can\u2019t I kiss you where someone might see?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThere is a man in town who wants to court me. I have rebuffed his every overture, but he continues to pester me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWouldn\u2019t it help if he saw you with another man? Wouldn\u2019t that make him back off?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not sure you know what this means. He would take it as an insult to his honor that someone stepped between him and me. If I say no, and there is no other man, then he will be all right with it, but if he suspects that you are actively romancing me, he could become quite jealous.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIf people see me come here, aren\u2019t they already telling him that I am seeing you?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, but you see, you are the illustrator of my book, and you are a writer too. He would not feel threatened by a writer and an artist.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWho is this man that he can control your life like this when you do not want his attentions?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe is the son of the mayor. As I told you, there is always politics. To reject him for a foreigner would be tantamount to the greatest insult for I would not only be rejecting him but all of France. Do you see?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat I see is that you stay here because you think it is safe, and you can keep your son safe, but you are not safe. You are a prisoner here. You are imprisoned by your fear and the man who engenders such fear in you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI am not afraid for myself. I am afraid for you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s about the same thing as I see it. You cannot see anyone you want to see because you have to fear what this man will do. It\u2019s very sad. Does he approach you and make you feel uncomfortable when you are not with me or one of your parents?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe approaches me as you say, but I just tell him no as I always do. Then he smiles and says \u2018Someday\u2019 and then he goes on his way.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIf that\u2019s all it is, then why are you afraid that he will see us together and suspect something?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe is an excellent swordsman. Dueling is illegal but he would not stop because of that. His father is the mayor. No one would do anything if he killed someone in a duel.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat if someone killed him?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt is very unlikely, but I think his father would be upset enough to charge that man with murder for he would not believe that his son could die in a duel. He is a champion.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI fenced when I was in college so I am not inexperienced except none of my opponents was ever trying to kill me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDo not joke about it. Please just say that you will be careful and not do anything to antagonize Philippe. He gets angry very easily.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIf it makes you feel better, I will. Now how about a smile before we go down to dinner. We don\u2019t want to upset Jean or your parents.\u201d Adam had promised, but he also knew how life could take unexpected turns. When he was in Paris for a few months, he bought a rapier for practice, and in his room at night, he spent an hour running through all the moves he remembered from his training. He also began to walk miles every day at as fast a pace as he could maintain. By the time he returned to Calais, he felt more confident in his ability to survive a duel if he was ever challenged. Someone as jealous as Helga had described Philippe would not likely suffer his presence for very long before he became very suspicious. As it turned out, it was Jean who lit the fuse to the powder keg that was Philippe. Only a few weeks after Adam\u2019s return, he got a letter from his publishers that he needed to meet with them in London to finalize all paperwork for his book to be published and the last chapter serialization would run for a week just after publication. Helga and Jean walked Adam to the docks so that he could board a boat for the short trip.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll be back within a week or two, I think. I\u2019ve left most of my things here because I do not expect that it will take long to accomplish what I need to do. I have the draft of your book too. Both the manuscript and the drawings are safely bound up in one package, and I will deliver them as I promised. Hopefully they will have some word for you before I leave.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI pray that you have a safe trip and that all is satisfactory to you. I know that the serialization of that last chapter bothers you so perhaps you can get a note in the paper to indicate that the last chapter is different in tone from the rest of the book.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou are very clever. I think I may ask them to do that. Then it is buyer beware if they do not pay attention to that. And Jean, I want you to take good care of your mother while I am gone. Perhaps you could do some drawings for her? When I get back, I could work on them, and then we could both sign our names to them?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, Adam, I will. But you come back soon because Mama is a little bit sad when you\u2019re not here. She must miss your hugs and kisses. I know I would miss Mama\u2019s hugs and kisses if she was gone.\u201d<\/p>\n

Standing a short distance away hoping once again to speak with Helga about seeing her, Philippe correctly surmised that Adam was not just a writer and illustrator for Helga. Philippe began to picture Adam with Helga in his arms, and then he pictured Helga in Adam\u2019s bed. That had never happened, but Philippe believed it had. After Adam\u2019s boat pulled away, Philippe left without speaking to Helga. He would deal with her after he dealt with Adam Cartwright. He went to talk with his friends about his plans. He had heard Adam say he would be back in a week or two. Philippe planned to be ready for him.<\/p>\n

On the Ponderosa, Adam\u2019s first letter from Calais had arrived. Hoss waited anxiously for his father to finish talking business with two men who had come to buy some horses and ask for more. When the two men left, Hoss was immediately at Ben\u2019s side.<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, I got another letter from Adam. It\u2019s addressed to you as always, but it\u2019s in this big envelope and it seems kinda thick. I\u2019m wondering what\u2019s in it.\u201d<\/p>\n

After opening the envelope, Ben pulled three small drawings from it as well as a letter. He read through it quickly before picking up one of the drawings. \u201cHoss, this one is for you. It is a drawing of a legendary sea monster that is said to inhabit Loch Ness. He said he didn\u2019t see it, but that Lady Constance did visit the lake. The lake monster is named Nessie, and people swear that she exists.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, that\u2019s darn interesting. I\u2019m gonna be waiting for Christmas at the orphanage this year so I can tell this tale to the orphans, and I even got a picture of it to show \u2018em. What did you get, Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI have a drawing of the ships in the harbor at Calais. That\u2019s where Adam is now. He said he\u2019s met some wonderful people, and that he is working with one on a book she is writing. He\u2019s doing the illustrations.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnother gal? Well, he shur didn\u2019t waste no time, did he?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, it could simply be a business arrangement.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, like that Lady Constance was just the daughter of the man who owned the castle. What did he send for Joe?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s a drawing of a steeplechase in Suffolk that he attended with Lady Constance. He said it\u2019s a very rough and tumble kind of racing that he never expected to see in a country like England. Apparently he followed Lady Constance\u2019s advice on wagers and made some money betting for horses to place.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s sure having a big adventure, ain\u2019t he, Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, he is. He says that he plans to visit Paris next, but then will return to Calais. Perhaps you are correct in his interest in this lady author. I wonder what kind of book it is.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s probably some big ole fancy book. You know what kinda books he likes. Now I think I\u2019ll go out to the woodshed and see what kind of wood we got that I can make some frames for these drawings. Joe\u2019s gonna be tickled pink to see the drawing Adam made for him. Those horses look so alive in that drawing.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhere is your brother? He hasn\u2019t been home much lately.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t worry, Pa, he\u2019s not drinking or gambling.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat is he doing?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, he don\u2019t want to get your hopes up too much, but he\u2019s been seeing a gal a lot. He\u2019s thinking on asking to court her.\u201d<\/p>\n

Surprised but happy, Ben smiled. \u201cIs there a reason I haven\u2019t met the young woman yet?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot that I know of, Pa, but don\u2019t tell Joe I said anything. He thinks he\u2019s got a big secret.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI still don\u2019t understand why it\u2019s such a big secret.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, she ain\u2019t supposed to be seeing any men.\u201d<\/p>\n

Frowning, Ben stared at Hoss who gulped because he wasn\u2019t about to say anything more. Suddenly it made sense to Ben. Joe had been reading a lot of Adam\u2019s books recently, and had taken to wearing a tie when he went to town. \u201cHe\u2019s seeing the schoolteacher?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, Pa, ain\u2019t that a hoot. Who\u2019d ever expected Joe to be interested in a schoolteacher, \u2018specially one who likes all them big ole fancy books and all. Joe\u2019s smitten, though, Pa, really smitten.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 8<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, Adam Cartwright!\u201d<\/p>\n

Hearing his name called, Adam turned as he walked from his publisher\u2019s offices to see Connie hailing him from a hackney in traffic. She waved for him to join her in the conveyance. Once he had joined her in the vehicle, she told the driver to go to the nearest park. Once they were there, she told the driver to stop and wait for them. Adam helped her down and then offered his elbow for a walk.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat makes me think that this was not a coincidence? My publisher inexplicably needed me to stay for an extra two days, and then today said that it had all been a mistake and handed me my first copy of my book. I walk outside and there you are waiting for me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI did ask him to hold you here when I heard you were in town. My cousin who tattled on us for Pontrefact saw you. I knew it had to be to see your publisher so I contacted them, and they said you were here about your book. I had to talk with you so I asked them to keep you here until today. I hope that hasn\u2019t made you angry with me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t like being manipulated. If you wanted to talk with me, why didn\u2019t you contact me directly?\u201d<\/p>\n

Stopping on the edge of a small pond in which ducks were swimming, Connie decided it was time to explain everything that she could. She knew how much Adam valued honesty in a relationship. \u201cI\u2019m sorry, but my father wouldn\u2019t have allowed that. I had to find a way to get here without him suspecting why. Mother helped. Adam, my father gave his grand party. Lord and Lady Dunsford were back in country by then and attended. He mentioned to them what he said was your preposterous story that you and they were friends, except they agreed that you were a great friend, and they were sorry they had missed you. Then they told everyone about the Ponderosa, and that my father had one of the wealthiest men in Nevada working for him for almost a year. Many people congratulated him on that. Somehow he feels that he was tricked though, and he\u2019s angry about it. He thinks you made a fool of him.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy did you think that you should tell me that, and how could I have made a fool of him. At no time, did I keep any of my background secret. It was his choice not to believe me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFather is too proud, but he is also very protective of me. He thinks that because of my age, you could take advantage of me. I told him that if you wanted to do that, you had had plenty of opportunities but that you had always been a gentleman. Now, if you did want to see me, Father would not likely object or at least not very much, but you would have to come calling. Your name is well known now, and it\u2019s not unusual for daughters to spend time with commoners if they are wealthy or famous commoners. Even so, he would not consider it proper for me to have come to you as I did.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut the very concept of commoners and nobility is distasteful to me. People should be judged on who they are and not on who their ancestors were.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat may be true, but it is not how things are. Do you want to see me again?\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam paused to consider that. \u201cYes, I do, but I could not tell you that it would be any more than it was when I left. I\u2019m not ready to make any kind of commitment.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo you still plan to travel through France and then to Italy?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, and I have work to do yet. I\u2019m writing a book about my travels now, and explaining how an American from the west sees these countries.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAm I in your new book?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes and no because my experiences with you in England are a big part of what I wrote, but you are not named nor are you the subject of my observations. It is meant to be more light-hearted look at how Americans differ in their behavior and attitudes from people in England and France.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot Italy?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI plan to finish writing the book before I visit Italy. I don\u2019t speak Italian so it would be far more difficult to understand the differences. In Italy, I want to tour the cities and see the art and architecture of the Renaissance as well as the Roman ruins. Then my plan is to go back home.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou wouldn\u2019t consider living in here again. I\u2019ve heard some talk that it would be a good idea for you to teach some classes in the architecture and engineering of castles in regard especially to renovations that conserve.\u201d<\/p>\n

Suddenly intrigued by that possibility, Adam had to ask. \u201cWho\u2019s been talking?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMy brother and some of his friends. He went to university before he went into the Army. He thinks that you could teach at a college here.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat could get me to live her for a while. That would be another dream come true. Which school?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt would be at the University of London where my brother did coursework. It is very different than Cambridge and Oxford. At the University of London, they believe that education should be useful and one area of study is engineering. You would be teaching those students. The arrangements have all been made. All you would need to do would be to tell them when you would be available.\u201d<\/p>\n

As Adam smiled and nodded, Connie was very happy to have been able to deliver news that pleased him. She took his hand and asked him to walk more with her. They completed a circuit of the pond and began the walk back to the carriage. Adam was thinking over all that she had said.<\/p>\n

\u201cDid you have anything to do with your brother arranging for me to get a teaching position here if I decided I wanted it?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, and my brother would likely be one of your students. He thinks that he can start a business if he had more expertise in renovation of historical buildings. He would like to put water closets into our home. That would be enormously popular with people who live in these old castles. It could be a very profitable business even if that was all he did, but he liked your idea about the transom windows and the stoves too.\u201d She pulled some papers from a small purse she was carrying.<\/p>\n

Unfolding the papers, Adam saw that it was a contract that had blank lines for dates to be filled in later, and there was a list of all contact information he would need if he decided to pursue this option. \u201cPerhaps I should meet this brother of yours sometime.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIf you could stay, you could meet him now. He\u2019s moved back home now that his military service is completed.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cConnie, I can\u2019t. I made some commitments while I was living in Calais, and I still do want to finish my tour of the architectural wonders of France and Italy. When I\u2019m done with that, I could come back here.\u201d<\/p>\n

Clearly disappointed at that news, Connie still smiled because Adam was talking about coming back to England so she thought that she still had a chance with him. They returned to the carriage and got Adam back to his room. He kissed her on the cheek when he said goodbye. She didn\u2019t know if it was because it was in public or if his feelings had changed. She would have to wait to find that out. She did wonder if there was another woman but knew that Adam would not have told her if there was. If anything, he was discreet. She would know that too when Adam wanted her to know.<\/p>\n

In his room, Adam sat down by the window and stared out but saw nothing as his mind swirled with possibilities.\u00a0\u00a0 He did want to teach at a university, but he also wanted to see more of France and get to Italy. He wondered how he would manage everything. When he got back to Calais, he planned to sit down and work out an itinerary and an estimate of the time required for travel. He wanted to finish his second book too so he would have to build in time to do that. Then he would have a time frame for teaching and could contact the University to see if that was acceptable to them.<\/p>\n

The next day, Adam headed back to Calais with good news. He hoped that Helga might consider traveling with him. He thought that Jean would like to see more of France as well. When he arrived in Calais, he went to his room first to drop off his valise, and then he headed to Helga\u2019s apartment. When he arrived, she seemed cool toward him even when he handed her the new contract from the publishers and their acceptance of her book that Adam had illustrated. He knew the money she had received would support her for the next few years so he wondered at her reaction. When she thanked him as if to dismiss him, he had to ask.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s wrong? I left a few weeks ago, and we were getting along so well. Now you act as if I haven\u2019t been your friend at all.\u201d<\/p>\n

Walking to a window, Helga stared out and asked Adam a question in response to his. \u201cAdam, in twenty years, where do you see yourself?\u201d<\/p>\n

Wondering where this conversation was going, Adam went along with it out of a need to know. \u201cI see myself on the Ponderosa relaxing with my family.\u201d<\/p>\n

Helga turned to look at him as he leaned against her table. \u201cIn twenty years, I see myself here, relaxing on the porch downstairs, and watching my grandchildren playing in the yard.\u201d Letting that sink in, Helga wasn\u2019t finished. \u201cI had a lot of time to think while you were gone. It was so comfortable working with you that I let my heart open to you, and I should not have. For no good reason, I have endangered you and myself, and worst of all, my son.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hearing her words but also watching her and seeing how stiff she was, Adam didn\u2019t take long to reach a logical conclusion. \u201cPhilippe has been talking with you. He\u2019s frightened you. Has he made any threats against you or Jean?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPlease, Adam, you are done with your work here, and you said you still wanted to see the south of France and travel through Italy. You should do that and not change your plans because of me. There are many things you still want to do, and all I want is to live here peacefully and keep my son safe.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou didn\u2019t answer my question.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe has not threatened us, but I know he is already angry and jealous. I don\u2019t want any violence to occur because of me. I don\u2019t want anything to happen that causes trouble.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHelga, you can\u2019t live your life in fear. Yes, sometimes bad things happen, but no one can control everything.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut I will control what I can. The rest is in God\u2019s hands. Please go. Jean will be back soon, and I do not want him to see you any more.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHelga, someday you may regret giving up on life. Jean may not want to live in this cocoon forever.\u201d Adam turned to leave. He had not fallen in love with Helga, but he could have. There was so much about her that he liked and admired, but it had always been her reticence to give her heart that had made him guard his. He knew that he did love Jean and wished to have a son like him. He walked slowly back to his room not noticing anything in the streets which was a huge mistake and a measure of how hurt he was. He felt more than saw the trap that had ensnared him before he got back to his room. Philippe was there and very angry.<\/p>\n

\u201cI told Helga that she was not to see you again, and the first day you are back, you are in her apartment. Do you know how that appears? Do you have any idea how you make people talk about her? You are no gentleman, but I give you the option of acting like one. I challenge you to a duel.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd if I say no?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThen my friends here will beat you and drop you into the harbor with all the other garbage floating there.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot much of a choice then, is there? Where will we duel and with what?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou may choose, pistols or rapiers, but I must warn you that I am expert with both.\u201d<\/p>\n

Considering his choices and believing that pistols could be more dangerous because a second man could shoot him quite easily, and Adam had heard of this happening on occasion, he chose the rapier. He could only hope that if he lost, the wound would not be fatal. He would not kill Philippe if he could help it, but in a battle such as they were planning, it was impossible to control the variables. \u201cRapiers. When and where?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cTonight, on the hill above the graveyard.\u201d<\/p>\n

Remembering what Helga had said that Philippe\u2019s father would never believe that he could be defeated in a duel especially by an American, Adam had some caveats. \u201cNo, that is not acceptable. I have no second, and I want the duel to be witnessed by many so there can be no dispute afterwards as to how the outcome was reached.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cVery well, if you wish your humiliation and death to be so public, it will be so. I will meet you in an hour by the pond in the park. Go write your last will and testament and make peace with God if you may.\u201d<\/p>\n

As Adam moved to walk away, the group of men parted to let him pass, but he could see their smirks. He could only hope that they were not smirking like that in little over an hour from then. In his room, he carefully selected his clothing. He made sure that the pants he wore were loose enough so that he could move freely. He wore a shirt with long sleeves and buttoned his leather vest over it. He hadn\u2019t worn the vest since leaving America and was pleased that it fit quite well. All of the work he had been doing as well as the walks and practice with the rapier had kept him fit and trim. He had taken the measure of Philippe when he had been talking with him. His red cheeks and paunch had betrayed him. He probably had spent too much time drinking and staying up late. He might be quite skilled with a rapier, but if Adam could prolong the duel, then he fully expected Philippe to make mistakes as he became tired. A duel outside like this suited Adam\u2019s purposes quite well. He had to survive the early minutes of the duel, and wear down his opponent\u2019s defenses by taxing his stamina. Before he left his room, he penned a quick letter to his family that he hoped would not have to be delivered.<\/p>\n

The duel was well attended. Many had heard what was to happen, and most were there hoping against hope that the American would rid them of Philippe. He had killed others and terrorized many more. His father had protected him for a decade, but this American did not seem to fear him so there was a buzzing in the crowd as he walked toward them. Philippe had half expected him to pack up and leave town, and had men watching to see if he would do that. He was surprised to see Adam walking toward him with rapier in hand because he had brought one for the American to use never expecting him to own one. As Adam got closer, Philippe could see that the rapier appeared to be a very fine one with excellent workmanship and that Adam carried the weapon, as one would be expected to carry it. He had not expected that either, and his confidence dipped a little. He still fully expected to win and to kill Adam, but knew now that it would be more difficult than he had first anticipated. He was also a bit unnerved because Adam did not seem at all afraid. He walked toward Philippe with a deliberate pace and a stony face. He remembered then of what his fencing instructor had warned him.<\/p>\n

\u201cFear the man who appears to have no emotion, for he is concentrating on one thing alone. The loud and boisterous ones are as afraid as the simpering fool, but the one who walks toward you with ice in his veins, he is the one to fear. He could put you in your grave.\u201d<\/p>\n

For the first time in his dueling career, Philippe felt the first niggling of doubt which he quickly squelched and replaced with bravado. He was a champion, and his opponent had come from the American wilderness so surely there was nothing to fear, but in his heart, doubt remained even when the duel began and he was able to easily drive his opponent backwards again and again with his lunges. After several minutes of that though, Philippe had yet to strike a blow or draw first blood. He began to attack more ferociously using every skill that he possessed. He managed to bloody his opponent\u2019s arm, but still he kept his rapier moving so rapidly that Philippe was hard-pressed to counter ever move and parry every lunge and still maintain his own attack. His father had come to see his son defeat this American, and gasped when he saw Philippe\u2019s blade dip down several times. The American was not skilled enough to take advantage before Philippe raised his guard again, but the weakness had shown that his son was weakening. If anything, Philippe realized his opponent was increasing the speed of his moves and Philippe had to go on the defensive to parry each lunge until suddenly he found himself backing up to avoid one after another. Unable to do even a very basic riposte, he was becoming tired from the constant assault.\u00a0\u00a0 In a desperate move after several minutes of that, he lunged when it appeared that Adam had left himself open, but as Philippe drove forward in what he hoped would be a killing strike, Adam smoothly stepped to the side and brought his left arm down on Philippe\u2019s wrist numbing his hand and forcing him to drop his rapier. He fell and turned only to find a sharp point pressing into his chest above his heart.<\/p>\n

\u201cI believe that you need to concede defeat.\u201d<\/p>\n

“Arr\u00eat!” Philippe\u2019s father stepped forward. \u201cMr. Cartwright, you have won. Now step back.\u201d After Philippe stood, his father addressed Adam. \u201cYou are no longer welcome in my city. Dueling is illegal, and I could have you charged, but I will allow you to leave here. You have one day, and then you must be gone.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 9<\/strong><\/p>\n

After making arrangements to leave Calais early the next morning, Adam went to see Helga. He thought she had probably heard what had happened, but he wanted to talk with her and try to get her to travel with him at least for a little while. He also was very observant and watched for anyone following him or waiting for him. He had humiliated a bully, and there was probably no greater threat than a coward who had been masquerading as a tough guy only to be betrayed by his own weakness. Once he recovered from the humiliation, anger would likely take over for a time, and Adam knew he would be in jeopardy when that happened. He had already moved from the room that he had to one in another property owned by the same proprietor. The man had come to his room to suggest it and did mention too that many had hoped he would have killed Philippe. He had told Adam that if he had a pistol, he should carry it. Adam thought that a large pistol in a holster would be asking for trouble, so instead, he wore a small caliber pistol in a holster under his coat and kept a small pocket pistol in his coat pocket. He doubted there would be another duel so he was mainly concerned with defending himself in an attack. In town, that would likely be from close range so he felt adequately protected or as well as he could be under the circumstances. Helga met him as he walked to her parents\u2019 home. She had seen him coming.<\/p>\n

\u201cPerhaps Philippe will not trouble you again.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou do not know him. He is more dangerous now than he was before.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat do you think he will do?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe will try to kill you by any means he can. You should leave now. I don\u2019t want anything to happen to you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou do care then.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course, I care. Please, will you leave?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWill you and Jean come with me? We could travel to the south of France and stay there. You could write there, and I could make your illustrations.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, I can\u2019t. I\u2019m afraid.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHelga, your fear is keeping you from living. Please come with me and have a vacation from fear. Let Jean see some of his country and enjoy being in new places. It doesn\u2019t have to be any more than being friends and traveling together.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI can\u2019t. Please go now. Please.\u201d Helga turned then and walked rapidly away. Adam knew that she was torn, but he had very little time left to convince her to change her mind. He turned to walk back to his room where he intended to spend the night now until he left the next morning. He saw movement in the shadows and paused in his walk. A door opened behind him almost causing him to draw his pistol.<\/p>\n

\u201cQuick, in here. There are three of them at least. We saw them follow you and wait for you to come out of Helga\u2019s apartment.\u201d The owner of the bakery was no fan of Philippe, and he had been very happy to learn that Adam had defeated him. However like many others in town, he knew that Adam\u2019s life was in danger because of it.<\/p>\n

\u201cThank you, but what now. I don\u2019t want you to be hurt because of me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFollow me.\u201d The baker led him into a back room where there was door into the restaurant next door. He went through that and the owner of the restaurant was there to lead him to the stairs. They said nothing so that no one in the restaurant turned around to look. It was then that Adam realized Philippe was at the window of the restaurant looking out into the street. Everyone in the restaurant made all sorts of normal chatter and noise to cover his move up the stairs. At the top of the stairs, he was directed into a back room. \u201cIt is small, and it is not very comfortable, but much better than a casket, isn\u2019t it?\u201d After Adam stepped into the room, the owner pulled the door closed. Adam saw by the moonlight that came in the window, there was a bed, a chair, a table, and nothing else. A short time later, the owner returned with a plate of bread and cheese and a glass of wine.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey\u2019ve gone out searching for you. We will try to get your belongings to you, but I\u2019m afraid that we will not be able to get all of it without it being too obvious.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI thank you for all that you are doing. If I get my valise, it is all I need. I packed my clothing and my papers in there. The rapier is for anyone who wants it. Considering that it was used to defeat Philippe, perhaps any number will want it. But what will happen in the morning? I have made arrangements to leave.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cEven Philippe will not attempt a murder in daylight. His father would not tolerate that though he has protected him from prosecution for the duels he has fought. He will not protect him if he believes he had committed a murder. No, we believe you will be able to leave safely if you can get through the night.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIs Helga safe?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, Philippe is a jealous and dangerous man but has never hurt a woman. She is safe as long as she is not with you. Now we will keep watch. Eat, rest, and tomorrow, you may leave.\u201d<\/p>\n

The night passed fairly quickly. Adam realized that he was tired after all of his exertions with the duel and then with the emotional meeting with Helga. He ate, drank the wine, and lay on the bed to get some rest. The next thing he heard was the clatter in the restaurant down below as the workers began setting up for breakfast. Dawn was breaking and he had two hours before he was scheduled to leave. He had chosen to go by ship so that he could see Gibraltar before he went to the southern coast of France. Unfortunately, when the men who got his things saw the letter on the table addressed to his family, they sent it thinking they were doing him a favor not knowing that it was his letter to his family in case he had not survived the duel. They brought him his valise and the restaurant owner treated him to breakfast in exchange for the rapier that he planned to hang on the wall of his restaurant for all to see.<\/p>\n

As Adam bid his new friends goodbye and headed to the docks to board the ship that would take him on his journey, he heard a familiar voice challenge him.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo you are a coward and run away now?\u201d<\/p>\n

Slowly Adam turned to find Philippe and two of his friends. One carried a box, and from the shape and design, Adam guessed it contained dueling pistols. He raised his hands to show they were empty of any weapon. \u201cI\u2019m leaving as your father ordered. Our business was concluded yesterday.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOur business as you call it will be concluded when I say it is concluded. You misrepresented yourself. I told you I had experience with the sword. You did not tell me that you did.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI never heard that was a rule of a challenge. You challenged me, and we agreed upon a place and weapon. I did what was required of me. You lost. It\u2019s over.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo. I say it is not over. I challenge you to a duel at this time and in this place. I have the weapons or are you afraid of using pistols?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPhilippe, I am an expert with a pistol. You said I should declare myself, and I have.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI have killed a man with a pistol. Have you?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo.\u201d Philippe smirked, but it didn\u2019t last long. \u201cI have killed a number of men and wounded others.\u201d Philippe\u2019s confidence wavered for only a moment on hearing that.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou are a braggart. I know that you are an artist and a writer. I know that you worked on a castle before coming here. Such a man is not a duelist.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve given you fair warning. Stand aside and allow me to go to the ship. I have booked passage, and I will soon be late.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Eduard will give you first choice of a pistol. We will settle this here and now. Jacques will be the judge.\u201d<\/p>\n

Removing his coat, Adam let them see the pistol he carried. It shook their confidence a little for it appeared that Adam did indeed have experience with pistols. Eduard walked to Adam and opened the box. Adam removed both pistols checking them for balance and chose one. He loaded it and waited. Eduard walked to Philippe then, and Adam could hear him trying to convince his friend not to do the duel. Philippe laughed but it was a nervous laugh. He picked up the second pistol and loaded it. The two men stood about twenty feet apart. Adam pointed his pistol into the air and waited for Philippe to do the same. By then a large crowd had gathered to watch. Jacques began counting down from five but Adam watched Philippe more than he listened. As Jacques said two, Philippe lowered his pistol to fire and Adam moved quickly to the side. The shot went by him, and he aimed his pistol at Philippe\u2019s chest. Shocked that his trickery had not worked, Philippe looked at Adam\u2019s cold fury and suddenly knew he was going to die. He turned and ran. The crowd broke out in jeers and laughter that only escalated when Adam fired into the air causing Philippe to drop to his knees in terror. He stood then and everyone could see that he had wet himself. More importantly for the future of the city, Jacques and Eduard laughed as hard as anyone. Gone were the days when Philippe could bully them into doing things. Eduard picked up the pistol that Philippe had dropped and walked to Adam. He placed the pistol in the case and offered it to him.<\/p>\n

\u201cThese are, by all rights, yours now.\u00a0\u00a0 Take them, and if you do not wish to keep them, give them away.\u201d<\/p>\n

Accepting them, Adam nodded, put on his coat, and picked up his valise before walking through the crowd to the ship at the dock. The sailors on board had seen what had happened and many were smiling. Men appreciated seeing brave men in action. Philippe was not well liked, and Adam would have been pleased to know that the mayor sent him to live with relatives in the countryside where he could not get into any more trouble. It may have been his only son, but he had become an embarrassment. As Adam sailed from Calais, a ship, carrying a letter to him from his family, docked in the port. No one there knew Adam\u2019s destination so the letter sat there for years before crumbling into dust at the back of a post where lost mail was held until a recipient could be located.<\/p>\n

Disembarking at Gibraltar, Adam enjoyed a few months in that locale before relocating to the south of France and lived on the coast there for a few more months. He spent his time drawing, writing, and learning about the people and their culture. Finally he decided it was time for his trip to Italy, and booked passage to that country.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 He began studying Italian and found it not too different from the French in which he had become fluent. Before he left France, he wrote another letter to his family, and wrote another to the University of London telling them that he would be available to teach in six months, and that he would be willing to sign up to teach one term. He gave them an address in Rome that was the property of some people he had met in the south of France. They had relatives who lived there, and said he would be able to rent a room from them when he got there.<\/p>\n

On the Ponderosa, there was confusion and sadness. A parcel from Adam with a copy of his book and a short letter had arrived. Soon after, another letter arrived. In the first, he explained that his first book was being published and that he had gotten a copy, which he had sent to them. He said too that he would send a copy of the book he had illustrated when it became available. He mentioned also that he might teach at a university for a brief time before he came home. Ben had been ecstatic to have Adam say that. In the years he had been gone, there had not yet been a mention of when he might return, but now it seemed that there was a definite plan. Adam said he would go to the south of France next and then Italy before returning to England to spend some months teaching. It might be a few years, but Ben knew that he was coming home eventually. He, Hoss, and Joe celebrated that as well as Joe\u2019s engagement to the schoolteacher, Patricia, who had become a frequent visitor to the Ponderosa. The two of them planned to marry as soon as she completed the two-year contract she had signed. It was clear that Adam wouldn\u2019t be home in time for the wedding, and that made Joe a bit sad, but he would be home at some point so there was still a feeling of happiness. Then the second letter arrived. It was very short, and said that they would only be receiving it if a duel that Adam was to be in went badly. He said how much he loved his family and thought of them every day. He said his prayers were always for their safety and good health. It had obviously been written in a hurry and his name was scrawled across the bottom, but all three knew that it was Adam\u2019s handwriting. There was no joy on the Ponderosa for quite some time after that note arrived. Both Hoss and Joe worried about their father. He had lost three wives, and each one had taken some of his strength away, but the loss of a son was so much harder. Hoss did his best to be strong for his father, but nothing he said ever seemed to help. Ben always had only one answer when Hoss tried to console him.<\/p>\n

\u201cA father should not outlive his sons. It is too painful.\u201d<\/p>\n

There wasn\u2019t much more that either Hoss or Joe could say to that. They both felt a similar pain in that they believed their brother had died. For some time, they said nothing in Virginia City about the news they had received. They chose to mourn privately. It was about the time they thought that perhaps they should share that news that a letter and parcel arrived from Adam detailing his stay in Gibraltar and explaining that he was then in the south of France. There was no mention of the duel creating even more confusion, but at least it alleviated the sadness for it was clear that Adam was still alive. The package was a case containing a matched set of dueling pistols. They were finely engraved and had silver and gold decorating the grip. However Adam said nothing about Joe\u2019s impending wedding and the pistols were sent to Ben so it was clear he had not received their letters. It was becoming very frustrating to the family to be separated this way and unable to communicate.<\/p>\n

The lack of communication was troublesome to Adam as well because he wondered what was happening at home. Because of the delivery of the note that was never meant to be delivered, his family did not write for a time thinking that he was dead. By the time his letter arrived, and they understood that he was not, their letters failed to reach him before he sailed for Italy. There he moved about so often that no letter would have been able to reach him unless sent to the Rome address he had given his publisher.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Too late, he realized he had not sent that address to his family, and did send it, but it would be difficult for their letters to reach him before he left Rome.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 10<\/strong><\/p>\n

Being lonely was a feeling that was not usual for Adam. He knew how to be alone without being lonely, but as he stood in his rented room looking out at Rome, he knew he was lonely. He tried to understand why he felt that way and began to believe it was not seeing any member of his family for a few years. He had made a commitment to the University of London to teach for one term. He knew too that if he did not see the wonders of Italy while he was there, he would regret it for the rest of his life. There were things that he had seen that many people in the world had never seen so he was a very lucky man. He realized though that some of his fondest memories were things that had happened naturally. The trip from Gibraltar to southern France had been his best yet as he saw Mediterranean striped dolphins several times and saw a pod of Mediterranean sperm whales as well. Unlike many travelers, he had no desire to see mountains, but he had made side trips to the mountains to see castles. Set in that natural wonder, castles seemed even more magical. He had some desire to travel to Africa now that he was so close, but he knew he couldn\u2019t. A desire to see his family was growing within him, and he knew he would have to follow it home.<\/p>\n

Nearly finished with his second book, Adam began sketching buildings in Rome from the classical age as well as Renaissance sculptures he found in many cathedrals that he also sketched. His drawings were beginning to dominate his book as he found less to say about the people, and more to say about their cultures and his reactions to the things he saw. When he was thinking it was time to leave Rome to visit Naples and Venice, he made the acquaintance of Katarina Virginia Achilli in her father\u2019s restaurant. Of all the restaurants in Rome, Adam favored the pasta at the Achilli restaurant more than any other. As they saw more and more of him, the owner, Giacomo Achilli, and his daughter, Katarina, began to talk with him more and more. Giacomo could tell that Adam was lonely and urged his daughter to engage him in conversation to find out more about him.<\/p>\n

\u201cYour Italian is very bad. Do you know that?\u201d<\/p>\n

Laughing, Adam was quite taken with Katarina\u2019s honesty. \u201cYes, I only learned enough to manage not to get swindled. I studied Italian while I was vacationing in C\u00f4te d’Azur. It is very beautiful there and the waters are as expected with a name like that.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo you are vacationing? I have seen you drawing sometimes. Are you an artist?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI would love to be, but I am only an illustrator. I illustrated a book for another writer and now hope to include my illustrations in my own book about my travels.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI would love to see your illustrations. Do you have some in that satchel then?\u201d<\/p>\n

Smiling, Adam pulled a number of his drawings from his satchel. Katarina was most impressed with the drawings of the harbor at Calais until she saw Adam\u2019s most recent works of the distinctive Mediterranean architecture that he had seen in the south of France. One view was especially striking.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhere did you draw this?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI was climbing around on the rocky hillsides and came across this natural arch. It showed the town down below, as well as the coastline, and some boats in the harbor. I drew the dolphins in the way I saw them when I was traveling there.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt is beautiful. You should draw more like this.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThank you. I think I will.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAre you planning to see Napoli? We have another restaurant there. My brother runs it. I could go with you and show you some beautiful scenery there too for you to draw.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOnly if I could draw you in the scene. My pictures are mostly too sterile. I realize as I have seen the artwork here that I need to inject more life into my drawings.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIs that why you drew the dolphins into that drawing?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, it seemed to give it life and a focal point.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHmm, yes, I see that now. Do you draw pictures of your home as well?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t, but when I go home, I think I will.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhere is your home?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m an American. I lived in Nevada most of my life. I\u2019ll be going back there as soon as I finish my journey.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPapa wants to take our family to America. He says it will be a better place for us to live. Here, politics has a way of intruding. He wants a safer place.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not sure America is a safer place, but there are safe places there, I suppose. Nevada isn\u2019t one of them.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAre you a cowboy then?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, I guess I am, but I hope I am much more than that too. I have a lot of ideas of things that I can do when I go back.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDo you have a family there?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, I have a father and two brothers.\u201d Then in a rare display of his soul, Adam made a major admission. \u201cI miss them.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, I would miss my family too if I left them behind in another country. If we go to America, we will all go together. Do you have a wife and children in America?\u201d Adam shook his head. \u201cWhat would my name be if I lived in America?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThere would be no need to change it, but if you did, it would be Kathy or Katherine. Your father would be James or Jacob if he decided to Americanize his name.\u201d<\/p>\n

With Giacomo\u2019s approval, Adam traveled to Naples with Kathy as he had taken to calling her with her encouragement. His father smiled at that for he wanted very much to go to America so his daughter having an American name pleased him. In Naples, Adam was surprised to see how close the city was to Mount Vesuvius.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy do people live so close to that volcano? If it erupts, they could all die.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, but many families have been here for a thousand years or more. The soil is exceptionally good and produces some of the best grapes and olives in all of Italy.\u201d Over the next month, Adam learned from the people there that Kathy\u2019s ideas were exactly correct.<\/p>\n

They would have gone up to the observation point nearly two thousand feet up the side of Vesuvius except Kathy\u2019s brother said that vegetation was dying on the upper slopes. When Adam asked why that was a problem, her brother said that sometimes gases came out from the volcano and killed trees and grasses. When that happened, it was not safe to travel to the top of the mountain. To Adam, then, the next best point of observation for Naples was from the sea. He could draw the city with the volcano in the background. For a week, Adam rented a small boat and rowed out several hundred yards each day to sketch the city. As he sketched, Kathy asked a lot of questions about America and about Nevada. She would lounge in the stern of the small boat as Adam sat in the bow staring ahead at the city and the volcanic peaks above the city. As the day got hot with the sun rising to its zenith, Adam would row back to the city and have lunch with Kathy. He and Kathy spent a number of afternoons hiking through pastures and orchards, taking rides on the roads, and touring the various parts of the city, which could be linked to historical periods by the style of buildings in each. On the hottest days, they would lounge in the shade and enjoy the soft breezes from the bay. By the time Adam decided to move on, Kathy was quite enamored of him. He had to be honest with her though.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not ready to give my heart to anyone. I don\u2019t understand why, but I have had several opportunities and it isn\u2019t in me to do that. I do want a wife and family, but perhaps I need to go home first. I don\u2019t know. You are an attractive and very likable woman. I wish I did love you. It would make life so much more complete. You have been a great friend, and I have certainly enjoyed your company, but Kathy, I never kissed you. I didn\u2019t want you to fall in love with me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPerhaps you did not want that, but it happened. You don\u2019t have to love me. If you like me, that could be enough to marry. You might learn to love me. Many people marry someone they like. Love is a desirable thing but it can develop over time with someone you like. You did enjoy your time with me, so why would you say no to us being together?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cKathy, you are very young yet. You will find a man who will give you his heart. You deserve that.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut I do love you already. How can I love another when I love you and only you are in my heart?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m so sorry. I didn\u2019t want to hurt you at all. I\u2019m going to Venice next. It will take some time to get there, and then I want to spend at least a month there. Before I leave, I\u2019ll come back to Rome. I\u2019ll talk to you then, and see how you feel. It will give both of us time to evaluate how we feel, and to decide what is the best thing to do.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAll right, if that is all you will give me. Do you promise that you will come to see me?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, I promise. I won\u2019t leave Italy without at least saying goodbye.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPerhaps it will not be goodbye. Perhaps you will miss me and want me by your side. You are lonely. I could ease that for you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cKathy, sweet one, you don\u2019t know how that tempts me, but I cannot let myself take advantage of you like that. I must commit to you with all my heart and soul, or I have to say goodbye. It\u2019s the only way I could live with myself.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cCould you hug me and kiss me just this once? It is all I ask, so that is not too much, is it? Give me that one memory to hold forever if I get nothing more from you.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam pulled her to him and kissed her with passion. He did desire her, and she knew it. She kissed him with as much feeling as he kissed her. After a minute, he pulled away. He would not take advantage of her to satisfy his physical needs when he most likely had nothing more to offer to her.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t have to stop.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cKathy, I do have to stop. I will not let you think there is more here than there is. I will keep my promise though. I will stop in Rome to see you before I leave Italy.\u201d<\/p>\n

The next morning, Adam escorted Kathy back to Rome. He left her at the restaurant after thanking Giacomo for allowing his daughter to be his tour guide in Naples. He explained that he was going to visit Venice before leaving Italy and that he would be back in Rome in less than two months because in four months he needed to be in London to begin teaching as promised to the University of London. They had contacted him and asked him to teach one class on the engineering difficulties of renovating castles and another course on making mines safe using the honeycomb method of shoring. Adam was looking forward to those four months of teaching not only because it was a dream come true, but also because that meant that in eight months, he would be heading home. In a year or less, he planned to be back on the Ponderosa. He wrote a letter to his family before leaving Rome for Venice.<\/p>\n

Arriving in Venice after an arduous trek across the peninsula, Adam decided that his return trip to Rome would be by boat. He would also get to see more of the Italian coastline that way so there would be an additional benefit. He found Venice to be somewhat of a disappointment but was also surprised to meet people there whom he knew. It was only a few days after his arrival when he was hailed by name in that Kentucky drawl. He smiled for he recognized the voice immediately as well as the style of conversation.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, so here\u2019s the cowboy without a horse. Are you lost?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cGood to see you, Corinne, and surprised too. I never thought you planned to leave Kentucky.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPapa decided he wanted to buy some horses in Europe and he wanted Mama and I to come along. I think he\u2019s trying to find a suitable man for me. It hasn\u2019t worked so far.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAre you going to introduce us?\u201d A pretty woman was by Corinne\u2019s side and seemed a bit perturbed to be ignored when Corinne was talking to this dark haired, handsome man with the beautiful voice.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry, Adam, this is my cousin, Brenda. She grew up next door to me so we\u2019re almost like sisters. She did travel quite a bit and wanted to come along because she enjoyed her grand tour and thought it would be fun again. Brenda, this is Adam Cartwright. He\u2019s the wise mouthed cowboy who did his best to one-up me when last we met.\u201d<\/p>\n

For the next two weeks, Adam spent quite a bit of time with the two ladies. His loneliness forgotten in the company of two young and pretty American women, Adam enjoyed Venice far more than he would have if he had been there alone. It reinforced his belief that his plan to return home was a good one. Corinne was her usual saucy self but also showed a keen mind and she made astute observations about the city, which often were the same or paralleled Adam\u2019s ideas. The two of them thought much alike.<\/p>\n

Brenda was just as intelligent but with more of a focus on philosophy and the arts. She spoke eloquently of the literary works produced by the Italians both in the classical period and during the Renaissance and was a devoted fan of opera. She and Adam attended several performances to which Corinne declined to accompany them.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t need to hear that screeching. I like a nice sing-a-long song from home with guitar and banjo, please. I have never found all that loud singing in words I can\u2019t even understand to be any fun at all.\u201d<\/p>\n

There were other evenings when Adam played marathon chess matches with Corinne who was a skilled player. Adam enjoyed the challenge of finding ways to defeat her, and her diligence in trying to learn gambits that he would not find easy to counter. They would battle over the chess board, and Brenda would compare them to Hannibal and Caesar. By the time they were scheduled to leave, Adam knew he would miss them both. He had enjoyed all of their time together. On the last day, the three spent some quiet time in a gondola ride that lasted for several hours. That night he bid them both goodbye for they were scheduled to leave early the next morning.<\/p>\n

As Adam enjoyed his time in Venice with Corinne and Brenda, his last letter arrived on the Ponderosa. He told them of his upcoming teaching assignment at the University of London, and that he would be coming home after that. He didn\u2019t mention his second book because he wasn\u2019t sure the publishers would want it.<\/p>\n

\u201cAin\u2019t that something! Adam is gonna be a college teacher too. He\u2019s really done a lot in the years he\u2019s been gone, but the best thing he\u2019s done is decide to come back home. Don\u2019t you think so, Pa?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, I agree, but I\u2019m concerned that Adam never mentions anything that we write in our letters to him. He\u2019s never commented on Joe getting married. He had nothing to say about Jamie joining the family. I have to wonder if he\u2019s gotten any of those letters.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, maybe he ain\u2019t been getting our letters. Sure would be a shame ifn he didn\u2019t know all that stuff that\u2019s been happening here while he\u2019s been gone. Uh, Pa, I\u2019m going to take another trip to Sacramento ifn you don\u2019t mind?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, you seem to want to visit Sacramento a lot. Is there anything you want to tell me about why you\u2019re going there?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNah, I\u2019ll tell you when I get back. Now, I\u2019m going up to bed so I can get an early start on my work tomorrow. Once I get everything done that I need to do, I\u2019ll be heading out. Candy can handle anything that comes up until I get back. He\u2019s got Jamie and Griff to help him if need be.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cGoodnight, Hoss.\u201d As Hoss went up the stairs, Ben sat in thought for some time. He suspected that Hoss was seeing a woman in Sacramento. However, his unwillingness to share whom it might be or even that he was seeing someone made Ben believe there was a problem. He wished he could help, but that wasn\u2019t possible unless Hoss was willing to open up about what it was. Joe was due home from his honeymoon in the next few days. Ben planned to talk with him about Hoss to see if Joe knew of any way they could help. He couldn\u2019t help Adam so many thousands of miles and an ocean away, but he was going to find a way to help Hoss if he could.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 11<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cDid you like Venetia?\u201d Adam was sitting in the Achilli restaurant talking with Kathy. He had returned home via the Adriatic Sea passing by Sicily on his way to Rome. He had disembarked only an hour before and was keeping his promise to Kathy.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not sure what I was expecting. It had all the ornate decorations, and lots of marble and frescoes. There were palaces, domes, and bell towers. It has been written about so much that I guess I thought it would be even more fantastic, almost magical. It was very hot many of the days I was there, and often there was a haze that obscured the view. Maybe it\u2019s that I found it so different from anywhere else I have ever been.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPerhaps you were lonely.\u201d<\/p>\n

Then Adam told her something he should probably have kept to himself. \u201cNo, I met some people from America. I knew them and their daughter, Corinne. Corinne and her cousin spent a couple of weeks discovering Venice with me. I must say I enjoyed their company a great deal.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIs that why you couldn\u2019t stay with me? You had a meeting scheduled with other young ladies?\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam had seen the tightness around her eyes and her mouth. He knew she was upset, but that made him upset. She had no hold on him, and he had made no promises other than to see her again before he left. \u201cNo, I told you the truth. You can believe it or not. I didn\u2019t know they were going to be there, but I did enjoy being with someone from my country and seeing things with them.\u201d He knew then that he should never have kissed her. She had interpreted that to be far more than he had intended.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry. I shouldn\u2019t have acted as if I was jealous.\u201d<\/p>\n

Only both Adam and Kathy knew it was no act. She had been jealous. She wanted Adam, and resented anyone else that he knew who might be a rival for his affections. They spent quite a bit of time talking about what he had seen in Venice and in his voyage from there to Rome including a short stop in Palermo, but the earlier ease of their friendship was gone at least for that night. Adam excused himself after dinner saying that he was tired and needed to get some sleep. The next morning, he went to the restaurant to say goodbye. Giacomo said that Kathy was not feeling well.\u00a0\u00a0 The two men sat for a time as Adam explained some places in America that Giacomo might find to be a good place for a restaurant business.\u00a0\u00a0 He included San Francisco which already had a sizeable Italian community and was considerably less crowded and dirty than the cities of the east which were growing so fast by that time and showing the negative impact of that. Thanking him for his advice, Giacomo bid him goodbye and a safe journey.<\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t worry about Kathy. She is young, and the young fall in love often. She will find someone to love her who will not mind her jealousy.\u201d At Adam\u2019s surprised look, he continued. \u201cShe spoke of you very often while you were gone. She seemed quite possessive even though she told us that you had made no promises to her except to return to talk with her before you left. I knew, and my wife knew, that it was not likely that you were coming back here to tell her you had changed your mind, but she is young, and in her imagination, she created a fantasy. She will learn as she gets older that she cannot dictate how people will feel.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThank you for understanding.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI thank you for not taking advantage of her. I know that must have been difficult, but it was also for the best. Now, good journey to you, and if we go to San Francisco, I will write to you so that you can come to our restaurant where we shall make you the best dinner anyone could make for you. Yes?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, and thank you. I hope you do go to San Francisco. California could use more good restaurants.\u201d<\/p>\n

Waving goodbye, Adam left before Giacomo remembered that they had been holding some letters for him. Giacomo sent a messenger to the ship to deliver them but it had already sailed. Once again, Adam did not get his letters from home. On his return to London, he delivered his manuscript and drawings to his publisher who promised him an answer within a week as to whether they were interested in his book. He got a copy of the book he had illustrated for Helga, and after he paged through it, he included it with a letter to his family.<\/p>\n

With several weeks before he began teaching, he thought about seeing Connie but decided against it. He spent his days walking and seeing more of the city, and spent most evenings working on preparations to teach the two classes he had signed on to do. He did a number of drawings to illustrate points for his classes, and began working on building scale models of the Deidesheimer design as well as other work such as balusters, transom windows, joiners, and others. He wanted his class to be practical and hands-on. The University had been pleased with his philosophy of teaching so he felt free to prepare as many models of course topics that as he could. Soon his room was filled with various props.<\/p>\n

On the Ponderosa, lots of things were changing. Ben had taken a boy under his wing and was thinking of adopting him. He missed having a young son to guide. Meanwhile Joe and Patricia had settled into married life on the Ponderosa and were building a new house. But even more significant was that Hoss brought not only a wife from Sacramento but a son. Hoss had been seeing a woman there but her family did not approve. When she became with child, they had secretly married so that their child would be legitimate, and it was only when her belly swelled that her Catholic parents relented and accepted that Hoss could marry their daughter. At that point, they had been relieved to find that the two were already married even if they had done it without parental permission. Beth was an active woman who loved the outdoors and seeing new things so she and Hoss were a wonderful match. Once her family got over the religious differences, they were pleased to see how happy Hoss made their daughter, but that paled in comparison to the sheer joy Ben had when he had found out. The Ponderosa hadn\u2019t seen that kind of party ever as Ben pulled out all the stops to make sure everyone knew how pleased he was to have a new daughter-in-law and a grandson. Of course, Joe contributed a lot of excitement to the festivities with his ideas, but luckily the fireworks went off as planned as did all the games and activities Joe had for the younger attendees. The house was getting crowded so Candy moved into separate quarters that were added to the bunkhouse, and even Ben looked forward to Joe\u2019s house being completed.<\/p>\n

More good news arrived with Adam\u2019s most recent letter. He told them he was teaching at the University of London but that he would be done in four months and then was coming home. He sent a copy of the book he had illustrated for Helga. As Ben handed the book to his sons, they were amazed.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe doesn\u2019t say anything about anything we told him, but he sends a book for my son. Aaron\u2019s a mite young to be reading, but we\u2019ll be sure to keep it for him until he\u2019s old enough.\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe was intently looking through the book. \u201cHey, Hoss, I think this little boy in the drawings is you. It sure looks like you.\u201d<\/p>\n

Both Hoss and Ben looked over Joe\u2019s shoulder then. \u201cYes, it does, Hoss, but Joe, that\u2019s you too. You\u2019re the little curly headed boy next to little Hoss.\u201d<\/p>\n

That got the ladies\u2019 attention and they wanted to see the book too. Candy was next to see the book, and Hoss and Joe knew there were going to be stories in the bunkhouse about them pictured as little boys. They were in for some teasing, but didn\u2019t mind. It was gratifying to know that Adam had been thinking of them even though he was so far away. For the rest of the evening, the book was passed around as everyone enjoyed all the illustrations featuring the images of Hoss and Joe as little boys with a new pony. The conversation though was on what Adam was doing and why he never mentioned any of the news they had given him in the previous years.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe only thing he ever said anything about was Candy being foreman. He said he liked that a lot, but he thought it was a funny name for a man.\u201d Candy harrumphed at that, but Hoss only laughed. \u201cIt is a darn funny name for a man, and you know it. If you wasn\u2019t so hard as nails, people would tease ya more about it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, I thought he would be pleased about the new businesses we\u2019ve started especially the paddle-wheeler on the lake. It was his idea to split the Ponderosa into separate businesses, but he\u2019s never said a word about that. He certainly said a lot about it before he left.\u201d Ben had hoped that all the changes would please Adam and help encourage him to come home, but nothing seemed to have made a difference. He never even acknowledged all the changes Ben had made.<\/p>\n

\u201cI know. He\u2019s never asked about the horse business either even after I wrote him that long letter all about it and thanking him for the idea and the horses.\u201d Joe often had a mix of love and anger with Adam. He still held some resentment over the letter that made them believe he was dead. That he never explained that was a sore point because Joe had seen how deeply sad and hurt his father had been until he realized that Adam was alive.<\/p>\n

In London, Adam was very much alive and enjoying his teaching immensely. He had students who were eager to learn and were fascinated by the models he built motivating him to build more. By the time he left, there were going to be a lot of items with his signature on them on the engineering laboratory. As he exited the engineering building one day after completing about two months of teaching or half the term, he was feeling particularly happy until he found Connie outside waiting for him.<\/p>\n

\u201cWeren\u2019t you even going to tell me that you were back? I had to find out from friends of my brother who are completely enthralled by your classes.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cConnie, it is good to see you, but I didn\u2019t want to call on you and give you the wrong impression.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, that you\u2019ve decided I could never be the one for you?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know. I don\u2019t understand what\u2019s in my heart, but I can tell you that I firmly intend to return to Nevada at the end of this term, and you would never go with me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI might.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cConnie, be honest with yourself. Would you ever be happy in Nevada? It\u2019s not at all like England.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou would be there, and I seriously doubt whether you will stay there. There will be too many other things pulling you away.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPerhaps, but the woman I want by my side would be one who would make me want to stay there with my family. Could you ever be that woman?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe I could, but I fear that you will never give me that chance.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cConnie, I\u2019ve been gone for over two years. Haven\u2019t you found someone else by now?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot like you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe that\u2019s who you need.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNow you sound like my father. He wants me to marry a proper Englishman, a member with the same or better social standing.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd that\u2019s important to you too, isn\u2019t it? If I wasn\u2019t so wealthy and well-known, would you still be interested in me?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIf I am being brutally honest, I don\u2019t know, but I think I would still.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know what to say. I have two months more here and then I have no more commitments holding me back from going home.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat of your dreams?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve achieved what I wanted. I made a mark for myself on my own terms. I left things that will outlive me. Now I need the love of a family to make me whole.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI wish you would consider my family as that family.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t think I ever could.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cGoodbye, Adam. If you change your mind, know that I\u2019ll be waiting and would welcome you with all I have to give.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam felt the loss as Connie walked away and climbed into a coach that had been waiting. He watched it drive away and wondered if he had done the best thing. For the next two months, he continued to wonder about that and the other women he had known. One woman in particular was in his thoughts and in his dreams more and more as time passed. No matter how often he told himself it was foolish and that what he was feeling was not love, her image was always there. Finally as he finished his teaching assignment and got a copy of his second book from the publishers, he packed to leave London. He had decided to go ask her to marry him and live with him on the Ponderosa. It was with a lighter heart that he left London. He said a prayer each night that his quest would be successful.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 12 <\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/strong>After two months of travel and a major disappointment, Adam arrived home. He had a lot of surprises and there was a lot for him to explain about his time away. He met his sisters-in-law, and was introduced to Jamie who was a big shock to him. He met Candy who fit the description Adam had received many years earlier, but was a more genial man than Adam had expected. Adam met a lot of the hands and talked with them. He found one of the most pleasant new things he got to enjoy was sitting by the fireplace holding his nephew who smiled a lot and slept best when being held. After a couple of days, he was back into ranch work, and on this day, his father had asked him to work with Hoss who took him out to repair some fences.<\/p>\n

\u201cI envy you so much, Hoss, but in a good way. I\u2019m very happy for you. You have a woman beside you every night in your bed, a woman to welcome you home, and one to smile at you every morning with the first light of dawn.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAw, c\u2019mon, Adam, you musta had a bunch of women while you were gone. You shur talked about a bunch of em. Your bed couldn\u2019t been empty too often.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cEvery night, Hoss, every night.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat, but, you, really?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen I was still in St. Louis after I sent that letter home that I was going to travel, I was feeling a bit sad but free. I found a beautiful woman who would share my bed, for a fee, of course. I was feeling pretty full of myself and ordered some champagne for us. I guess I got her to drink quite a bit more than she usually did. She began to talk. She said when she died, her gravestone would say she was dead and nothing else. It wouldn\u2019t even have her true name nor where she was from. Her family would never know where she was buried or even that she was dead. She said she had nothing to show for her life. She looked at me with tears in her eyes and said she gave men pleasure and they gave her gold and silver, but no one ever said they loved her, and she would never give anyone a baby to love nor make a home that someone would want to share with her or come home to. It hit me in the face full force then. I may have paid women what they asked and most often a bit more. I may have been tender and kind when I took my pleasure with them, but that was just it. I was taking, not giving anything of myself, but they were giving me some of their soul. I helped rob them of their self-respect, their hope, and any dreams they might still have. After that night, I couldn\u2019t bring myself to pay for it. I knew too that to take someone to my bed when I didn\u2019t intend to do that for every night of the rest of my life was wrong.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss was very quiet for a time. \u201cWhat was her name?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRobin was her name. I could have just as easily have been Bluebird or Merry or Julia. What does it matter? None of them ever told me their actual name. I got their business name.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI guess I never thought of it that way. Don\u2019t some of em like what they\u2019re doing?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI suppose so, but how could anyone ever know? They all smile and act like they like it. Robin told me that I knew her as well as I knew the wind that blows through the hills or the clouds that float in the sky. I didn\u2019t know her at all.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDang, now I\u2019m feeling a mite down.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t feel badly. Appreciate that you have a wonderful woman who loves you and a son who adores you. You\u2019re a lucky man.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd here I was kinda being jealous of all that you did and the places you saw. I guess a man\u2019s gotta open his eyes to what\u2019s right there in his grasp and not what he ain\u2019t got.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou are a natural philosopher. I should have talked with you more all those years ago.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAw, Adam, you still woulda gone. You had to. It was in ya, and it had to get out. You do need to have a good time though. Joe and me are going to town with Griff and Candy tomorrow. We\u2019re gotta pick up all the supplies that Pa\u2019s got on his list. We\u2019ll need two wagons to do it. Then we\u2019re gonna have a big steak at the restaurant, and some cool beer to follow. You should come along.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019d like that, Hoss. I really would. I need to enjoy the simple pleasures in life.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo ifn you do find a gal to marry up with?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShe\u2019ll be walking funny for a month at least.\u201d The two brothers laughed and continued working.<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, all them gals you got to know. Was there any one of them that was special?\u201d<\/p>\n

Nodding, Adam continued to work and Hoss knew he needed time to compose his answer. Finally he spoke, and his voice let Hoss know how painful the memory was. \u201cI asked one to marry me and live with me here.\u00a0\u00a0 She said yes, and we were supposed to meet at the church. She had things to take care of, and I had things to do to get ready. She never showed. She sent a note by messenger that she just couldn\u2019t give up her life and all that was familiar and safe to come live with me, a virtual stranger, in the wilds of Nevada, a completely strange place for her.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s a tough one. Sorry that had to happen to you. I guess there woulda been a lot for a gal to get used to out here ifn she had never been west.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, but I think anyone could love it here. I had to get used to a lot when I got back too. I couldn\u2019t believe that Joe got married and to a schoolteacher. I would have thought he would have been running in the opposite direction at the mention of the word school instead of chasing after the teacher there.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShe is a right nice gal, smart too.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, Patricia is a wonderful woman, and just what Joe needed. She seems to have given him all that he needed.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShe has. Jamie gave Pa what he needed too. I think once Joe began to settle down as he was seeing more and more of Patricia, Pa felt like he wasn\u2019t needed so much in the family. Jamie really perked him up again. Now you being home, he\u2019s got somebody to argue with again. He\u2019s gotta be as happy as a hog in fresh mud.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut nothing shocked me more than having you walk outside carrying a tiny version of you in your arms. I\u2019m an uncle. It still sounds strange to say it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd I\u2019m a papa. I can\u2019t wait to hear him say it. Beth says that\u2019s gonna be a while, but I dream about hearing him say it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, I got a question for you though. Griff looks at me like I did something wrong no matter what the situation is. What\u2019s the story there?\u201d<\/p>\n

So Hoss had to tell Adam that Griff was a parolee in their father\u2019s custody. He told him about the riot at the prison and how Griff should never have been locked up in the first place.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut that doesn\u2019t explain why he looks at me like I\u2019m going to hurt him or already have.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe looks at everybody like that at first. He went to prison when he was pretty young. You gotta think it was awful for him there. He didn\u2019t trust nobody when he got here, even Pa after everything Pa done for him. He and Candy stood toe-to-toe more than once about things. Seems that after that happens, he kinda settles down with ya.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo I have to get into a fight with him, and then he\u2019ll accept me?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, not necessarily a fight with him, but he\u2019s got to see you tested and see how you take it. That\u2019s how he gets the measure of a man. You\u2019ll do fine. You only been home a week. We\u2019re all still getting used to having you here.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s weird for me too. Things are the same and different at the same time. I find myself thinking I\u2019ll see something familiar and it is but always different too. I felt like I was in good shape too but every night I find a new place to be sore, and the mornings are worse.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss laughed at that one. \u201cThat ain\u2019t because of the work. That\u2019s cause you\u2019re getting old.\u201d<\/p>\n

Shaking his head, Adam decided to broach a subject that might be touchy, but he had to know. \u201cHoss, why is Joe upset with me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAw, I don\u2019t think Joe is upset with you. He\u2019s only gettin\u2019 used ta having ya back here.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, he gives me looks or makes a comment here and there which lets me know there\u2019s something smoldering in there. I\u2019d like to know what it is before it blows up in my face. I don\u2019t want anything to get in the way of us being family.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I guess it could be one thing. We all wondered about it, but none of us knows the answer, and you ain\u2019t brought it up at all.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s that?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThe letter that said you was gonna be in a duel, and you was only writing it so it could be sent to us if the duel didn\u2019t go too good for ya. We thought you were dead. Pa was down so low a snail\u2019s belly woulda looked like up to him.\u201d<\/p>\n

Shocked, Adam had to think back to what had happened and try to piece together why that letter was delivered. \u201cHoss, I did fight a sword duel with a man, and even though I prepared, the outcome was uncertain. I wrote that letter in case I was killed. I wasn\u2019t. I defeated him without drawing blood, but it only made him mad so that night I had to hide out so I wouldn\u2019t be murdered by him and his friends. Those who helped got my things from my room. I never knew they sent that letter. No one ever told me. I\u2019m sure they thought they were helping me out. I\u2019m so sorry. Now I need to tell Pa and Joe what happened.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot so fast. Pa got over it, and telling him you mighta been killed is no way to make him comfortable. You can tell Joe though. He\u2019s the one who\u2019s still upset about it. How did you get away without getting killed?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPhilippe wouldn\u2019t dare try to murder me in daylight. He challenged me to a duel with pistols. He missed and turned to run. I fired into the air, and he lost control.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe wet himself?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, I don\u2019t think he\u2019ll be in any more duels. The laughter was deafening, but I had been ordered to leave Calais so I boarded the ship. My next stop was Gibraltar. That one was kind of unplanned. By the time I got to the south of France and wrote to you again, it was almost time to head to Rome.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe wrote to you there too. Didn\u2019t you get any of our letters?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNothing after the letter about Candy being hired as foreman. I worried a lot about what was going on here. Seems I didn\u2019t have to worry at all. Things seem to have gone on just fine without me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNow don\u2019t you start getting all thinking we didn\u2019t miss ya. We coulda used your help a bunch of times. Pa was so happy to hear you was coming home, and so was Joe and me. We had no idea who was gonna take over running some of the stuff we got going with everything that\u2019s been changing. We\u2019re hired a lot more people, but there still has to be one of us checking on everything. We\u2019re hoping that you\u2019re gonna take over some of that.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd yet here we are fixing fence.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI think Pa wants the men to know that you\u2019re just like the rest of us and ain\u2019t afraid of hard work. Most of the men working for us now weren\u2019t here when you was.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo I have to prove myself? That I never expected.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s not so much proving yourself as it is letting the men know what kind of man you are.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSeems to be about the same thing.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNah, it\u2019s just that some got the wrong idea about you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWrong idea?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, cause you write books, and teach, and draw pictures, they mighta been thinking you ain\u2019t half barbed wire and the other half dynamite.\u201d Adam chuckled and Hoss laughed. \u201cYou don\u2019t seem so likely to explode as you did before you left though. Why is that?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI guess I\u2019m more at peace with myself. I did the things I wanted to do, and I\u2019ve accepted that not all of it worked out the way I wanted. But I did it on my own terms so there are no regrets. I\u2019m looking forward and not back.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo you\u2019re not planning on leaving again?\u201d<\/p>\n

Looking at Hoss and trying to determine the purpose behind this conversation, Adam began to suspect a few things. \u201cDid Pa send us out to work together this week so you could find out the answers to his questions?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNah, not really.\u201d At Adam\u2019s very skeptical look, Hoss had to be honest. \u201cWell, maybe a bit. Pa\u2019s a bit nervous about asking you that. He don\u2019t want to do nothing to make you leave.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNone of you did anything to make me leave the first time. I left because I had to leave. You should know that if I had stayed, I would have made all of you as miserable as I was. There were things I needed to do to prove to myself what I could do. If I hadn\u2019t gone, I would have doubted myself forever. Do you understand what it is to have a need to do something and not being able to do it?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAdam, I always thought you could do anything you set your mind to doing.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI had to know if I could do the things I had set my mind to do, and I had to do it myself. It\u2019s the way I am. Now I\u2019ve done those things, and I have no reason to leave and to do things by myself.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cEven if you didn\u2019t do everything you wanted?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat did I miss?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou came home alone.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat wasn\u2019t on my original list of things I had to do. It\u2019s one of the things I very much hoped would happen, but it didn\u2019t. Joe says I\u2019m unlucky in love. I guess he\u2019s right on that score.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe don\u2019t say you\u2019re unlucky. He says you\u2019re snake-bit by the devil himself.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam chuckled again but it wasn\u2019t with any humor in it. \u201cI could have married, but you could say my bad luck was by my choice.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNow why would you choose bad luck?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot that, but I could have married if I wanted to stay in England or live in a big mansion in some eastern American city. I could have married if I wanted to hide away and never travel. I could have married if I wanted to be a part of a new family and help them increase their wealth, or do a lot of other things. You\u2019re lucky because you found a woman who wouldn\u2019t expect you to give up anything you love in order to have her love. My bad luck has been to find women who want something from me that I don\u2019t want to give or to give up. I chose to come back here instead of accept life on someone else\u2019s terms.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cExcept for that one you asked. How was she different?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThe only thing she asked of me was to love her.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chapter 13<\/strong><\/p>\n

It had been a very long week for Adam, and after the few months it took him to get home as well as the disappointment of being jilted, he was ready for a break. Of course before that happened, there were chores to complete. He and Griff had the job of chopping firewood and kindling for the main house and the bunkhouse. The two men worked fairly quietly for a time.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t complain much.\u201d Griff had taken a short break from chopping wood. He had drawn the short straw as did Adam who was swinging an axe next to him. The day was getting warm, and with the exertion, both men had their shirts hanging open after only a half hour of chopping wood.<\/p>\n

\u201cI like to pick my fights carefully.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou know that Joe rigged the straws so he and Hoss and Candy didn\u2019t get them?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cUh-huh.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat doesn\u2019t bother you?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNope. Joe needed to win a few.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe talked about a few things last night. He\u2019s coming to terms with it all, I guess.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou didn\u2019t complain when you and Hoss had to work fences two days in a row either.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI like working with Hoss. I can talk with him and the work still gets done.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t talk a lot.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI can talk a lot, but swinging an axe and trying to be careful enough so the doc doesn\u2019t have to be called does take quite a bit of concentration.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t like me, do you?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHaven\u2019t made up my mind one way or the other. Pa and my brothers like you. Candy likes you. I haven\u2019t seen anything to make me dislike you, but we haven\u2019t been together much either so it\u2019s hard to know.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI thought you didn\u2019t like me because you\u2019re always looking at me like you expect me to do something wrong.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNope, I look at everybody. I\u2019ve got to get used to how things are around here now.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut it\u2019s your home and your family!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, but I\u2019ve been gone long enough that a lot of changes took place. They\u2019re looking at me the same way. Everybody\u2019s kinda waiting to see how things play out. Makes everybody a bit on edge.\u201d<\/p>\n

As Adam worked with Griff splitting wood, he thought about the conversation he had with Joe the night before. As Hoss had suspected, Joe was upset about the letter that was sent but shouldn\u2019t have been. Joe did accept and understand Adam\u2019s explanation about that, but Adam had noted the stiffness about his younger brother that indicated there was something more that was bothering him.<\/p>\n

\u201cOut with it. You may as well tell me everything that\u2019s bothering you about me so we can talk about it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat makes you think there\u2019s anything else that\u2019s bothering me? Everything\u2019s not always about you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBesides the fact that you didn\u2019t deny that there were other things bothering you, and that you seem resentful that I\u2019m back?\u201d<\/p>\n

Joe was perturbed then even more because Adam had struck at the two sore points he had been nursing for nearly a week. \u201cWe\u2019ve been here working and building the Ponderosa while you were off vacationing for years, and Pa acts like you should just step back into the place you had when you left.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd you think I shouldn\u2019t? What should I do? Ask your forgiveness for my selfishness?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDamn, you always make it sound like I don\u2019t have real feelings about things; like I shouldn\u2019t resent you coming back here and trying to undermine my position.\u201d<\/p>\n

That raised Adam\u2019s ire, and he struggled to keep his temper in check. \u201cJoe, I worked on this ranch twelve years before you took on a full role. I think I paid my dues for my place on this ranch and in this family. Furthermore, I have done nothing to undermine your position here. All Pa and Hoss have said is that they want me to take on some of the work that they can\u2019t get done. I have no intention of taking over anything you\u2019ve been doing.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo we\u2019re right back to where we were before you left?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSeems so. We\u2019ll always rub each other wrong sometimes, but Joe, know that I love my family and I love the Ponderosa.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAre you staying this time?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI plan to stay. I have no reason to leave.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPa wouldn\u2019t be able to handle it if you left again. You should have seen him when we thought you were dead.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss, told me. I had no idea that happened. I am so sorry about that.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat are your plans then?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPa\u2019s kinda finding ways for me to work my way back into the routines around here. Then based on some things he\u2019s said, I guess I\u2019ll be doing a lot of the traveling for contracts and investments as well has handling a lot of the timber and lumber business.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot the horses?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, that\u2019s yours, and Hoss and Candy have the cattle. I\u2019m not sure what plans Pa has for Jamie. I don\u2019t know him at all so I have no idea what he wants.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe wants to go to school, but he thought with all the work around here, he shouldn\u2019t ask.\u201d Joe smiled then realizing that he had surprised Adam with that one. \u201cHe wants to be a doctor, so he\u2019s as crazy about going to school as you were.\u201d<\/p>\n

They talked then about possible schools Jamie could attend and how they could talk their father into letting that happen. By the time they finished, they were back into the old camaraderie of hatching schemes and making plans. It had felt good to both of them. Adam spent so much time thinking about his conversation with Joe that he got a bit careless about where he was tossing wood that he had split.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, watch out. That one almost hit me in the head. I\u2019m gonna start thinking you really don\u2019t like me no matter what you said.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry, Griff. I was thinking too much. It\u2019s a fault my family knows only too well.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI get the feeling your family doesn\u2019t know you too well at all.\u201d That made Adam stop and look at Griff. \u201cThere you go staring at me again. That\u2019s a habit you gotta do something about. Man in prison stares at you like that, it can only mean a couple of things and none of them good.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSorry.\u201d Adam thought about what Griff had said. The young man was apparently quite intelligent and observant as well. \u201cI didn\u2019t mean to make you uncomfortable. You surprised me though and made me think. We already know that too much thinking can interfere with my work so you should try to avoid that.\u201d<\/p>\n

Griff knew that Adam was being evasive. \u201cSo like you just avoided saying anything about what I said.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt is taking some time for me to fit back in if that\u2019s what you mean. Nobody wants to do anything to upset things so everybody\u2019s holding back. It\u2019s going to take some time to get reacquainted.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou planning on leaving again?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I\u2019m planning on staying.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cGood. Your family seems to like having you home.\u201d<\/p>\n

Smiling Adam tossed more wood onto the stack they had created together. \u201cMaybe at some point, you won\u2019t mind having me here either.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam grinned, and Griff couldn\u2019t help himself and grinned too. Then the two men laughed and began stacking the wood they had chopped. They were planning to head to town after lunch and both wanted to get this hot chore out of the way so they could get cleaned up. Once Hoss and Joe got back and cleaned up, Candy was also there and ready to go. They headed out with two wagons and three men riding. Adam had a saddle blanket pad on the bench seat that got him some teasing, but he only said they were jealous because of the soft ride he was having. Griff was driving the other wagon, and Adam had put a saddle blanket on that bench seat as well. He nodded when Adam answered the critics. The ride to town was uneventful, but as they drove into town, Adam created quite a disturbance. All five men saw a pretty woman standing at the stage depot, but Adam pulled up his team, jumped from the wagon, and got a number of swear words directed his way as he made his way across the street causing others to have to pull up. Once he reached the stage depot, he reached out to the woman standing there by putting his hand on her arm.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou came.\u201d<\/p>\n

She turned, and at seeing him, she smiled with joy. \u201cI did. I changed my mind and tried to catch up to you, but everything that could go wrong, did go wrong. I\u2019m here now.\u201d<\/p>\n

Taking each of her hands in one of his, Adam looked into her eyes. \u201cYou will marry me, live with me, and be my wife?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cA bit redundant, Adam, but yes, yes, and yes.\u201d<\/p>\n

Wrapping his arms around her waist, Adam pulled her to him and kissed her with far more passion than anyone would have found acceptable for a man kissing a woman in public. He didn\u2019t care what anyone thought. She wrapped her arms around his neck and reciprocated in full measure.<\/p>\n

Candy walked up to Joe who was staring at his brother and was shocked at what had happened. \u201cHey, Joe, you said your brother was never very lucky with the ladies. If that\u2019s the kind of bad luck he has, I want some too.\u201d<\/p>\n

Griff leaned toward Joe with his own comment. \u201cI want to know what he said to her to get her to kiss him like that.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hoss didn\u2019t look nearly as surprised. He leaned against the buckboard and smiled. Griff had to ask why he wasn\u2019t as surprised as Joe. \u201cAdam told me he had asked some gal to come here with him to be his wife. She said yes but then changed her mind. I\u2019m guessing she done changed her mind back the other way again.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s her name?\u201d Joe was very curious now. Adam often told Hoss things that he didn\u2019t tell anyone else.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe didn\u2019t say exactly. I\u2019m guessing ifn we wait just a bit, he\u2019ll be introducing us to her.\u201d<\/p>\n

As Adam broke the kiss, he wasn\u2019t ready to let go. \u201cI want to get married today. I don\u2019t want to miss another minute with you.\u201d She nodded. \u201cNow I want to introduce you to my brothers, and to two of my new friends who work on the Ponderosa.\u201d<\/p>\n

As Adam turned to guide her across the street, his brothers as well as Griff and Candy doffed their hats in preparation for meeting the young lady. Suddenly Adam stopped and turned the lady back toward the stage depot, and the men wondered what was wrong. Adam leaned down close to her, and it was clear they were having a conversation.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s your real name, and don\u2019t you dare say Robin. I am not calling you Robin for the rest of my life.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMy name is kind of ordinary. It\u2019s Debra.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDebra. Hmm. I like it. Alright, Debra, are you ready to meet my brothers and our friends?\u201d<\/p>\n

After introducing her, Adam asked if someone would go get Ben and Jamie as well as Beth and Patricia. He asked if they would pack some of his clothing and his shaving kit. He didn\u2019t plan to go back to the Ponderosa for a few days. He meant to make up for lost time, and Debra smiled when he told her. Carrying her luggage, he walked to the hotel with her and then reserved the largest suite they had. He went up to her room with her and asked if she had a dress suitable for getting married.<\/p>\n

\u201cI brought my more conventional clothing with me. As you had suggested, I signed over the house to the girls there so I left them my more risqu\u00e9 clothing as well.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI hope you didn\u2019t leave it all behind.\u201d Adam had a very hopeful look that made her smile.<\/p>\n

Debra pointed to the smallest of her three bags. \u201cI brought some things to wear for you in private if you wanted that. I think you\u2019ll be pleased.\u201d That made Adam smile with a rather sexy look for his intended.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo regrets?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot once I was able to make the decision. I had saved my money to get myself from having to be with men for money, but running that house kept me as locked in that lifestyle as if I still was. You were right. You were right about a lot of things. To get the things I truly wanted from life, I had to leave all of that behind.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat would you have done if I had said no?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI would have been terribly unhappy about that, but I would have kept going. I would never go back to that life. I have enough money so I would have been able to start up a legitimate business if I had to. I\u2019m very glad I don\u2019t. In fact, I\u2019m ecstatic. I\u2019m already getting something I thought I would never have: marriage to a man who will give me his love. I think that you and I will be very happy together. I look forward to getting to know you. It\u2019s kind of odd. I love you because of what you have offered me and how you treated me, and I like you, but I know so little about you. It\u2019s just that there was something about you that made me trust you. You were honest with me when most men wouldn\u2019t be in those circumstances, and you were the only man who was ever with me who cared if I enjoyed our time together or not. You cared about what happened to me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDo you have family to tell? I mean you\u2019re getting married. I would think your family would want to know.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI can let them know, but I doubt that I will hear from them. I left under difficult circumstances, and if they have any idea what I did for a couple of years, they\u2019ll never want to have any contact with me. What I still don\u2019t understand is how you can be so forgiving of what I did.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPeople do what they think they have to do. I did. You did. Now we\u2019ll live together and do things together. We\u2019ll look forward and not back. No regrets.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAll right. Forward and not back. No regrets.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll wait for you downstairs in the lobby. Wait, Debra, one more question. How old are you? It won\u2019t make a difference but I would like to know.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cTwenty-eight and I\u2019m from southern Wisconsin, and I grew up in a very strict religious household and family. I didn\u2019t like it and left. St. Louis wasn\u2019t that far from there so it\u2019s possible that my family found out how I made my living after I left. Does your family know anything about me?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHoss knows, but he\u2019ll never say anything.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s funny. I knew that big man had to be your brother Hoss because of a few other things you told me years ago, but I had no idea who your other brother was. He looks less like you than the other two do. In fact, if you were a bit older, Griff could be your son. He looks a lot like you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDebra, I\u2019m forty-one. I could be Griff\u2019s father if age was the only factor.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHmm, you\u2019re very handsome and sweet too. I\u2019ll be down in a few minutes. Or you can wait right here if you don\u2019t trust me.\u201d She could see it in his eyes. \u201cSit right there. In a few hours we\u2019ll be married, and you\u2019ve already seen all of me anyway.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0 Adam did try to look away when she slipped off her clothing and dressed in clean underclothing and a clean dress, but he couldn\u2019t. He had to take a few peeks. When she finished and put her shoes on, she looked to where he was sitting and trying not to look so obvious about how curious he was.\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI know you looked. I don\u2019t mind. I\u2019m glad you still want me after all the other women you\u2019ve probably bedded in the last five years.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThere was no one.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAfter those things you told me that night we were together, I couldn\u2019t bring myself to do it.\u201d And Adam told Debra the same story he had told Hoss. Debra was amazed.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo wonder you want to get married right away and not waste a minute. Adam, you\u2019re going to have a great first night of being married. I promise you that.\u201d Debra wasn\u2019t joking about that.<\/p>\n

After Ben and Jamie and Patricia and Beth got to town, the family as well as Griff and Candy walked with Adam and Debra to the minister\u2019s home. After a quick and private consultation with the couple, the minister said he would be more than happy to perform a marriage ceremony. Ben was rather in shock, but Jamie was thinking this oldest brother of his was an exciting addition to the family for it certainly was never boring when he was around. After dinner with everyone, and after the appropriate toasts were made, Ben stopped by Adam\u2019s side as Adam and Debra bid the guests goodbye.<\/p>\n

\u201cSon, I can see how happy you are. I don\u2019t know all the background for how this came to be, but I\u2019m happy for you. I look forward to getting to know your wife. If you don\u2019t mind, I would like to start planning a party for next weekend to celebrate your marriage?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI think that would be fine, Pa, but nothing too elaborate, please.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOnly a few hundred of our closest friends?\u201d Ben chuckled at Adam\u2019s horrified expression. \u201cDon\u2019t worry. I got to do that with Hoss\u2019 wedding and to celebrate my first grandson. Joe\u2019s wedding was almost as big. This will be a much smaller and more sedate gathering. I think I remember the kind of party you like.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPa, just don\u2019t let Joe in charge of anything. I truly do not want a circus.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know exactly what you mean. We\u2019ll keep a tight rein on him. Thank you , Adam.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThank you, Pa. We\u2019ll be home in a few days.\u201d<\/p>\n

After Ben followed the others out of the restaurant, Adam offered his arm to his bride,\u00a0and they headed back up to the suite. Once they were in the privacy of their suite, Adam began to show Debra how much he appreciated her, and she showed him that they were going to have a very exciting and interesting marriage.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Next in the Very Series:<\/strong><\/p>\n

Very Much a Cartwright<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Tags:\u00a0 Adam Cartwright,\u00a0Angst,\u00a0Family,\u00a0SAS<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

<\/g><\/svg><\/i> \"Loading\"<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Summary:\u00a0 Adam has a lot of things go wrong for him on the Ponderosa causing him to leave. \u00a0His travels and accomplishments are fulfilling, but despite all the people he meets, he longs for his home and family.<\/p>\n

WC = 62739\u00a0 rating = T<\/p>\n

Very Series, links to stories within the series are included.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":229,"featured_media":9859,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"template-full-width-post.php","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1005,23,3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9856","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-adam-cartwright","category-drama","category-romance","wpcat-1005-id","wpcat-23-id","wpcat-3-id"],"a3_pvc":{"activated":true,"total_views":3482,"today_views":0},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/10\/feature-2.jpg?fit=338%2C338&ssl=1","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":7699,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=7699","url_meta":{"origin":9856,"position":0},"title":"Feeling Guilty (by DJK)","author":"DJK","date":"May 9, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary: Three vignettes that have the Cartwright brothers dealing with guilty. 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Rated:\u00a0 G\u00a0 (1,315 words) Thoughts Series, links to all the stories within the series included.","rel":"","context":"In "Drama"","block_context":{"text":"Drama","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=23"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":6754,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=6754","url_meta":{"origin":9856,"position":4},"title":"Superstition (by Jayne)","author":"Jayne","date":"May 4, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary:\u00a0 When Hoss and Joe decide to keep the black cat that crossed Adam's path, it proves to become Adam's bane. \u00a0 \u00a0 Rated:\u00a0K \u00a0WC 2000","rel":"","context":"In "Humor"","block_context":{"text":"Humor","link":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?cat=4"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":48039,"url":"https:\/\/bonanzabrand.info\/library\/?p=48039","url_meta":{"origin":9856,"position":5},"title":"Fourth of July Fun (by AH83)","author":"BZTrailRiders","date":"July 4, 2025","format":false,"excerpt":"Summary: Adam gets a Fourth of July surprise. 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