We’ve been back at school for the past two weeks and I must say things couldn’t be more boring. We wake up, eat, go to school, learn, eat, come home, do chores, eat, do homework, go to bed, and wake up only to start all over again. We were beginning to crave fun and were willing to do anything to get it.

I don’t know when it happened but eventually, skipping rocks and catching frogs didn’t seem all that amusing anymore. The ninth grade boys were into bigger and better things; the skipping rocks turned into skipping school and the catching frogs turned into catching girls.

We had a regular group of friends that we would meet up with on Fridays after school, most Saturdays, and Sundays during the usual church picnics. It was me, Joe, Mitch, Scott, and Tuck. We would always go to this old abandoned shack three miles down this small dirt road north of the ponderosa. It became our secret hide out and we’d always meet there to share ideas and come up with fun stuff to do.

We came up with a way to play some poker last week. A few of us were assigned something to bring in order to play like the real miners and old men play at the saloons.

It was Saturday and as soon as our chores were done, me and Joe went to the old shack. We got there about the same time as everyone else did.

“Hey, did you bring the cards?” Mitch asked us.

“Sure did. You whittle those chips the right size?” Joe said.

“Yep, I got em’ all right here in this box.” He smiled proudly.

We started the game but were quickly disappointed to find that me and Joe had absolutely no skill and lost three games in a row. It was agreed the week before that we would only bet stuff and not money. Scott won the third game with a large straight and got half a sandwich, our cookies and few pieces of candy. Our friends told us that we needed to practice and learn some tricks.

“And just where are we supposed to learn some poker tricks?” Joe was asking Scott who seemed to be enjoying our cookies very much.

“Mmm, same place I learned.” He mumbled.

“Where was that?” Joe continued.

“Saloon.” He answered.

“What! How’d you get in without them seeing and throwing ya out?”

“Well, that’s just it; you don’t let them see you. I snuck in and hid behind some booths. It wasn’t very comfortable but I got to watch enough games to know how to beat you two out of some cookies.” He smiled to himself.

Joe turned and looked at me. A certain twinkle in his eyes said everything I needed to know and a plan was formed. It was a simple and basic idea; if it worked we would end up really good at poker. If it failed, we would end up in big trouble because we we’re strictly not allowed in saloons. We were taking a chance, but if it meant learning poker and becoming the best underground champions the kids in Virginia City ever saw, then it was worth it.

The reason why we weren’t allowed to go in saloons was because in this territory there were numerous gun slingin fights, drunken brawls, and skimpy dressed women that always hung around them. For those main reasons, our pa wanted us nowhere near a saloon until we were at least eighteen and could make our own decisions. Why were we doing this, you might ask? Because our oats were gonna get sowed one way or another, so we might as well get the first one out of the way.

We managed to get in and sneak quietly over between a booth and the stair case. Once we got there we had a great view of two ongoing poker games, but that wasn’t all we noticed in the saloon. The first girl we saw our eyes were glued too in amazement. She looked nothing like any girl we had ever seen before and at that moment I became very jealous of my two older brothers who were able to come here.

In Virginia City saloons you had to be at least sixteen and with your pa or an older friend to be let in. Even then they’d still ask annoying questions that constantly ended with the purposefully degrading title of ‘boy’. “Watcha doin in here boy, school let out early? Where’s yer pa at boy, he didn’t feel like a whiskey today? You know I remember when you were just knee high tuggin on yer ma’s skirt, boy?”And if you were even twenty and had a mustache they’d still bombard you with all the same questions just to get a laugh. Thankfully no one saw us sneaking in because then not only would we be scrutinized with all those questions, but word would get back to pa. That’d make everything worse if he had to hear from everyone else in town that we were in a saloon after hours.

Everything was going perfectly as planned; we had a great view of the card games and an even better view of the girls. Things couldn’t have been working more in our favor. Until, we saw two familiar figures walk through those big swinging doors.

“I can’t breathe.” Joe clutched his chest as Adam and Hoss walked into the saloon.

“No, stay calm and let’s figure a way out of here. Don’t give up yet, I think we can do this.” I tried to give Joe some hope that we might make it out of here without getting caught if we could just wait for them to turn their backs and then ride like the wind on our horses.

We saw our chance when they walked up to the bar to order their beers. We got up from our positions and crawled to the doors ducking behind tables and chairs. About half way there it seemed like we were actually gonna make it; until my foot caught the back of a chair and caused it to make a loud screech across the floor boards.

They turned around and saw us completely frozen on the floor staring back at them. Grim looks came over their faces as they turned back around to the bar.

“Hey Sam, hurry up with those beers, I feel a head ache comin on!” Hoss yelled to the bartender as Adam put his head down and pinched the bridge of his nose. This was not a good sign.

Me and Joe got up slowly and went outside to sit on the steps and wait, all the while ignoring the quiet guffaws and whispers that weren’t so quiet. Five minutes later they came outside none too happy with their arms folded and bearing a deathly scowl. We could hear laughter from the men inside the saloon, what more could go wrong?

“What were you two doing in there?! You know we’ve told you before not to even set foot in front of saloon doors! And yet you thought it would be okay to actually go inside?” Oh yeah, Adam was becoming angrier by the second as he thought about how much danger we had put ourselves in. This night had taken an awful change in course; and explaining everything to pa was gonna be an anxiety all on its own.

“Adam, are you gonna tell pa? There went those eyes, those sad puppy eyes Joe always uses to get out of trouble. But unfortunately they would not work on Adam as him and Hoss picked each of us up and plopped us down on our horses. That was the longest and quietest ride home ever.

When we got into the barn and started to put our horses away Adam spoke. “Alright, I wanna know what happened, and no lies.” He looked both of us square in the eye. You would be out of your mind to even think about lying, but that’s just what I was going to do.

What else could I tell him? I could say; we deliberately disobeyed all of you because we wanted to learn how to play poker real good and then gamble with our friends? Nope, that wasn’t gonna work because our pa just so happens to be strictly against gambling. There was no way of getting out of trouble this time, so the only thing we could do was try an minimize how much trouble we were in. I figured a few little white lies wouldn’t hurt.

“It was my idea Adam, the whole thing. And Joe only went along to make sure I didn’t get hurt, blame me.” Now in actuality, half of it was Joe’s idea and he didn’t once try to stop me. But I figured that pa would just lecture us if I said it was all my idea. He was kinda soft on me since I was a new member of the family so I might as well use this to my advantage.

“Wesley don’t say it was all…!” I shushed Joe and gave him a subtle wink.

“Well you two better get your story strait cause here’s pa now.” Hoss nodded to the big door way as pa came running inside.

“Joe, Wesley, where have you both been? It’s nearly midnight, and you both went to bed at eight saying you weren’t feeling well. I went to your rooms to check on you… you weren’t there, I thought you two went missing. I was about to go into town. And why do you smell like…?” After he finished rambling on and caught his breath, he figured out where we’ve been by the smell of cheap whiskey. All the worry had left as his face became dark. Oh, I hated it when he got that dark disappointed look.

“We found them in the Silver Dollar hiding behind the stair case. I haven’t the foggiest idea why, but their all yours to find out pa.” Adam nudged us towards pa as he and Hoss got back on their horses and started towards town to continue their night out. As Hoss rode past me he gave me this sad sorry look like he wanted to help. But what did he want to help me with? I wondered to myself.

Joe started off to tell him what happened but I cut in.

“It was my fault pa; Joe only went along to stop me. I didn’t know it would be dangerous, at the time it didn’t seem like that bad of an idea. It won’t happen again.”

“Oh, is that what happened?”He looked at us for a moment completely ignoring my statement, and then he pointed to the house and said to go inside.

“Wesley don’t lie it just makes things worse!” Joe whispered to me as we followed pa inside.

He walked over to sit down on the red chair. A little panic was creeping into my nerves. I’ve lied to people plenty of times and it made no difference to me then, but this time I felt kinda weird about it.

“Come here in front of me.” Our steps were very couscous as we made our way to stand in front of him.

“Alright Joseph, I want you to look straight into my eyes and tell me if what Wesley just said is all the truth.”

First he stuttered. “No sir, half of it was my idea. And we knew what we were doing was wrong.” Joe had such a pitiful look on his face.

“Andrew, I want you to look me straight in the eyes and tell me the truth, now.” His voice lowered when he said the last word ‘now’ which sent chills up my spine. The way his eyes looked into mine it was as if they were almost daring me to lie.

I was perfectly capable of lying again… until he called me Andrew. Just like he calls Joe Joseph when he’s mad or serious, now he calls me Andrew? I didn’t stand a single chance! I guess there’s a time for everything and here goes my first time telling the truth.

“We wanted to watch the men play poker so we could learn some of the tricks.”

“What were you going to do after you learned the tricks they used?” His tone was a frightening calm.

“We were going to practice them on our friends.”

“Were those poker games with your friends going to be just for fun, or at a cost?” I was hoping he wouldn’t ask that question.

“We were gonna play for stuff, but not for money.” Well, there it was, he had gotten the entire truth out of me. I could feel a change in me, it was indescribable.

“Alright, let me add this up. First you lied and said you weren’t feeling well so you could sneak out of the house?” We nodded.

“Then you went to a saloon knowing full well you’re not allowed?” We nodded.

“And on top of it all, you went there to learn poker tricks for when you gamble with your friends. Since when did you start playing poker with your friends?” He started to shout.

“Last week, we borrowed a deck of cards from the bunk house and whittled our own poker chips out of wood.” Joe explained how we did it.

“What were you two thinking? Saloons can be dangerous and they are no place for young boys like you’re yourselves.” He got up from his chair and started pacing around the room.

“Are you mad at us, pa?” Joe’s voice sounded so squeaky.

“I’m not as mad as I am disappointed that you two would do something like this. You disobeyed me and did something not only wrong but dangerous. And do you know how worried I was? You nearly gave me a stroke!” He stood behind the settee with his hands tightly gripping the back cushions.

“We’re sorry pa, really we are. We’re sorry that we made you worry and that we disobeyed you.” Joe made an attempt to tell him how sorry we were and possibly lessen the punishment.

“We didn’t mean to make you worry, and we didn’t know what we were doing would be all that dangerous. We’re sorry we disappointed you too.” Usually my apologies were forced and un-sincere, but I actually meant this one whether we got punished or not.

Pa let out a big sigh and then pointed to the stairs. I gave Joe a questioning look.

He turned to pa and said; “Pa, are you gonna…?” His sentence was cut off by a single look from pa that meant you’ve got about three seconds to get up those stairs. Just that little gesture sent us scrambling up the stairs and to our room.

When we got in the room Joe pulled me aside. “Okay Wesley, I think we’re in for it, I’m runnin out of ideas, you got any?” His voice had a panicky tone.

“Wait, were in for what, a lecture? That doesn’t seem so bad?”

“No worse, a tanning. We gotta think of something.”

“T’…tanning? You mean he would actually tan us?” I was surprised.

“Not if we can help it, stop asking questions and help me think of something! Come on Wes, don’t you have any ideas?”

I just sat down on my bed and thought.

I had never been tanned before, never even threatened. I hadn’t given it one thought while we were down stairs, I just thought he would yell or something; but a tanning? I needed to think about this for a moment.

“We don’t have much time before he comes up, he’s only gonna wait a little longer to calm down and then he’ll do it.”

“Too be honest Joe I don’t have much experience in this kind of situation, I usually do my best not to get caught and if I do get caught then I lie my way out of it, but this time it’s different. I don’t think we can get out of this one.” I looked up at him with a serious face.

Joe just sat on the bed next to me and sadly waited for what would come next. About ten minutes later we heard footsteps on the stairs. At that moment I thought back to when we were in the barn and Hoss gave me that look as he rode past me. I figured out what he meant now.

“How’s he gonna do it?” I asked.

“It’s been a while since the last time I got one about a year ago, and that time it was over the knee. Hopefully we’re still too young for the belt.” He said mournfully already knowing the answer.

The door opened and pa walked over to us. I was told to go stand on the other side of the room and face the wall, which meant Joe was going first over the bed. I could hear him slide his belt out of the loops of his pants. I cringed for every lash and counted that there were ten.

Without a word, me and Joe switched places. Each step I took across the room was hesitant and careful; I wasn’t in any hurry to face my father and you would think he’d of said something about how slow I was moving, but the truth was that he didn’t want to do this either. It was as if this punishment was hurting his heart more than it hurt our backsides.

A few minutes later we found ourselves sitting uncomfortably on my bed and deep into a heartfelt lecture. Then pa hugged us tightly for what seemed like an eternity, but when he pulled away it felt too soon and I wanted him back.

“I still love you both very much; all is forgiven so let’s move on from this, get some sleep and I’ll see you both in the morning.” He turned and walked out of the room.

It hadn’t completely registered in my mind yet that I had just received my first tanning until I changed into my night shirt and attempted to lay on my back. Needless to say that didn’t work, so I ended up on my stomach with my arms folded beneath me mirroring Joe who was lying on his bed across from mine.

I’ve heard a lot of different things about this before. Some people say that if your pa tans you then he’s a cruel man and he doesn’t love you because he’s turning you into a mean bully. Other people say that if your pa won’t tan you then that’s because he doesn’t love you enough to do it. I needed some questions to be answered; but who could I ask?

I looked at Joe, but he wouldn’t be able to answer my question cause he’s in the same boat as me. I’m just gonna have to find out for myself and ask… pa. I was thinking that if all was forgiven then this shouldn’t be a problem; but why was I still so hesitant?

I got out of bed and made my way quietly to the door; Joe stirred around but couldn’t call me back fast enough to stop me. In my mind I mentally thanked his effort to prevent trouble for me; he would be the best brother ever if he wasn’t the one who helped come up with the bad ideas in the first place.

When I got to the top of the stairs I saw pa sitting in his red chair drinking out of a tiny glass with this amber liquid. The fire kept the house nice and warm since there was a cold breeze tonight, intruding upon our usual warm weather. He seemed relaxed so I guess it’s now or never.

I took a few steps down and purposefully stepped on that one creaky board to get his attention. “Pa, could I ask you something before I go to bed?”

He eyed me for a second and then motioned for me to sit down on the settee near him. “What would you like to ask me, son?” His voice had a calming effect that cut though the tension I was feeling inside, which made it a lot easier to ask him my question Knowing he harbored no mixed feelings of what happened less than thirty minutes ago.

“What does it mean when you… t’ tan your kids? Is it good that your parents care enough to do it? Or does it mean that the parents don’t love you, because they did it?” I cursed myself for how small my voice sounded.

He stared at me for nearly a whole nerve racking minute and then he answered. “Well, do you think I’m a mean person or that I don’t love you?”

“No sir, I think that you do love us all a lot.”

“Well I have chosen to discipline my sons that way before, and you’re right, I am not a mean person and I do love all of my sons very much. There are many ways that parents choose to discipline their children. In some cases they can do it without ever laying a finger on their child. In fact, I grew up with some people who were never spanked as a child and they grew up to be fine people. I have also grown up with friends that were disciplined with mild tanning’s such as the one you and Joe received earlier, yet they also grew up to be fine people. You see, every child is different and they respond to different things. It’s the parent’s job to find out how they respond to certain things, and then act accordingly.” I nodded my head.

“Joseph, come down here please.” He said it quietly without even looking up.

Joe appeared from around the corner of the hallway and meekly made his way down the stairs and over to sit next to me. It was safe to say pa knew all of his sons very well.

“How did Adam or Hoss respond differently when they were younger?” I asked him.

“Oh they were quite different in many ways. When Adam was a child and did something wrong, I could usually talk things out with him and he’d understand it and never really do it again. There were times when it was necessary to punish him, but overall he was very bright growing up and learned right from wrong at a fast pace.”

“And how was Hoss?” Joe asked him.

“Oh Hoss was a quiet and gentle boy, he never did anything to get in serious trouble. Once, when he was about five he disobeyed me; and instead of a spanking I told him he couldn’t have any of this cake a neighbor had brought over for dessert one day. He was so unhappy with that punishment that he even asked for a spanking instead. Eventually the next day he made a vow to never disobey me like that again, and I let him have a piece of cake after all.” Pa was smiling at the memory of I’m guessing a young happy Hoss eagerly eating his favorite chocolate cake. That thought maid my lips curl too.

“I have always believed that the best way to discipline my children is out of love and not in anger, which is why I chose to wait a while after we talked and then go up stairs, and not while I was still upset.” He made a lot of sense and answered my question completely.

“You know, it can be complicated at times; but people just have to know that if they don’t do what’s expected of them, there’s a consequence. And not only does this make a good work incentive but it also helps you gain structure and soundness of mind.” He rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

“It’s getting late boys, you should go on up to bed; but I want you both to remember that you can always come to me and ask any question no matter what might be the circumstances.”

We both agreed to remember.

“See you both in the morning.” He smiled and hugged us each tightly.

I would always remember this day; because this was the day I realized how wise my father is and how fortunate I was to have him. At times he could come off as strict, even unreasonable, but love and thoughtfulness was always his motive; no matter what he did or how, there was always love and warmth.

*

After that day, me and Joe stopped all of our “extra activities” such as showing up late and leaving early from school, stealing kisses from girls when they least expected it and only doing it when we were absolutely sure they expected it; and above all, we stopped playing poker.