Summary:  A woman in Ben’s life comes between Joe and his father

Rated: K (13,015 words)

My Life To Live

As soon as he heard the sound of his father’s horse in the yard below, Joe sprang out of bed and ran over to the window.  He watched with a sigh of relief as he saw his father dismount and lead his horse into the barn.  As he turned away from the window and headed back towards bed, Joe cursed himself as he had countless times before for feeling this way.  What was wrong with his father going out after all?  What was it about it that made him feel so uncomfortable?  Joe didn’t know the answer to that, he only knew that he always felt a huge sense of relief whenever the man came home again.

Maybe it has something to do with the reason for his outings he thought as he snuggled down under the covers again. Maybe it was the thought of Katherine that he just couldn’t come to terms with?  He knew he didn’t like the woman, but he just couldn’t put his finger on why that might be so.  For his father’s sake at least he knew he had to hide the fact….. for the man seemed so fond of her, but for the life of him Joe couldn’t understand why.

She just seemed so… he sighed as he rolled over towards the wall and closed his eyes. So…pushy was the word that sprang to mind.  So confident in herself and everything she did.  Not that there was anything wrong with that of course, but it was her attitude towards him that really got under his skin.  She seemed to look at him as if he wasn’t good enough all the time and whenever Joe was around her that was exactly how he felt.

Every remark she made seemed designed to make him feel as if he wasn’t measuring up to what she considered one of Ben Cartwright’s sons should be and he didn’t know why.  She and Adam got along fine, but then that was to be expected.  They shared a lot of the same interests after all. He had heard them sit and talk for ages about books and the theatre and he couldn’t make head nor tale of what the conversation was about.

Hoss on the other hand she had absolutely nothing in common with, and that should have meant that they didn’t get on either.  But in fact it was the exact opposite.  Hoss seemed to worship the ground she walked on and considered her right for their father in every way.  She didn’t make sarcastic comments where Hoss was concerned and seemed to accept him just the way he was.  They didn’t need to talk about the finer things in life to get on.  She just seemed happy to talk to Hoss about things that interested him…and in fact she seemed to take a delight in it.  He had seen Hoss come out of his shell with Katherine more than with any other woman ever and that very fact in itself was amazing.

It seemed like it was just him who felt uncomfortable around her.  Pa of course thought the world of her and Joe sensed that things might have the potential to become quite serious between them both.  He cringed at the thought of it.  Of course he loved to see his Pa happy.  There was no question of that.  But it was just that… he sighed.  There was no easy answer to this at all.  He wanted to be fair to Pa, but he just couldn’t bring himself to like the woman.  Joe wished that he could, for his father’s sake.

XXXXXXXXXX

‘So how did your evening go?’ asked Adam from his position in the large armchair near the fireplace.

‘You still up?’ asked Ben surprised. ‘I thought everyone would be asleep by now.’

‘Hoss and Joe went up ages ago,’ replied Adam as he shut his book.  ‘I wanted to finish this.’

Ben sat down and stretched his legs out in front of him. ‘So?’ asked his son again. ‘Did you have a good time?’

‘I certainly did,’ replied Ben with a contented smile.

Adam grinned. ‘You seem to be spending an awful lot of time with Katherine lately,’ he said.

‘Do you mind?’

‘Not a bit.  I think she’s wonderful, you know that.  I’m just glad you’re happy Pa.’

‘Well I wish everyone around here felt the same way,’ said Ben, glancing at the stairs.

Adam didn’t need to ask whom he meant. ‘He’ll come around Pa.  You know what he’s like.’

Ben nodded thoughtfully. ‘I hope you’re right,’ he said. ‘I’d like to see them getting on better.  Katherine is quite worried about it.’

‘I’m sure it will all sort out,’ said Adam, opening his book again. ‘Katherine could get around anyone in time.’

Ben smiled as he stood up. ‘Well she sure is trying,’ he said. ‘Coming up?’

‘Soon,’ said Adam absently. ‘I’ll just finish this. Night.’

‘Good night,’ replied Ben as he mounted the stairs.

XXXXXXXXXX

‘That’s fascinating,’ said Adam.  ‘What motivated him to enter politics in the first place though?’

‘My father was always politically minded,’ Katherine replied. ‘He was a lawyer during his early career and I think he just saw so many injustices that he decided that he should try and do something about them.’

‘He must have been a fascinating man,’ said Ben, looking at her admiringly.

‘Yes he was,’ she replied.

‘I thought about studying Law at one stage,’ said Adam. ‘But I eventually decided on engineering instead.’

‘Education is a wonderful thing no matter what field you study in,’ said Katherine. ‘I’m so glad my father impressed that upon me.  He was a very forward thinking man for his time you know.’

‘He sure sounds it,’ said Hoss.  He was hanging on Katherine’s every word, his eyes shining as he gazed at the confident woman opposite him at the table. ‘It ain’t fer everyone though.’

Katherine smiled back at him. ‘Well everyone has their niche in life Hoss.  All I’m saying is that education can only enhance what gifts we have.

‘Reckon so,’ he said thoughtfully. ‘I guess I’m just not the studying kind.’

‘Nor me!’ said Joe emphatically. ‘I could hardly wait to get out of school.’  He gave Katherine a challenging look.

‘It’s never too late to further your education though Joseph,’ said Katherine sweetly. ‘You could still go to College you know.  A boy your age …’

‘I ain’t no boy!’ declared Joe, cutting across her.

She continued to smile at him. ‘No, I’m sorry,’ she said. ‘I shouldn’t have said that. ‘Seventeen is practically a man isn’t it?’

‘Ain’t no practically about it,’ said Joe sulkily.

‘Well haven’t you considered College?’ asked Katherine, ignoring the remark. ‘I’m sure your father would be keen for you to go.’  She smiled at Ben next to her who returned the look.

‘Actually Joseph and I have discussed it many times,’ said Ben. ‘He knows that I would love for him to attend College if he wants to.’

‘And I’ve said that I don’t want to go!’ declared Joe, feeling his temper begin to rise.  He didn’t see what business it was of Katherine’s anyway and was angry that she’d turned the attention to him.

‘You know you might enjoy it Joe,’ interrupted Adam. ‘There are many courses that you…’

‘How many times do I have to say it!’ asked Joe. ‘I’ve said over and over that I don’t want to go!’

‘Alright,’ said Ben, holding up his hand. ‘Let’s change the subject shall we?  I suppose it’s unreasonable for me to think that you should go just because Adam did after all.’

Joe put his head down, obviously unhappy with the whole conversation.  Ben glanced at him and then over at Katherine. ‘So how did you go with the negotiations with Forsyth?’ he asked pleasantly to change the subject.

‘Fine,’ she replied. ‘He said that he’d like to sell as soon as possible. Ben, are you sure that you don’t want to bid on that land yourself?’

‘No,’ he said. ‘I’m happy for you to take it.  It’ll make a good addition to your property and provide you with a steady water supply.  Have you looked it over yet?’

‘Yes,’ she said. ‘It’s certainly strange doing all this myself now.  I’m so used to Martin doing these things.  Since he died it’s all been somewhat of a challenge for me.’

‘One I’m sure you’re coping with extremely well,’ said Adam with a smile.

Katherine returned the smile. ‘There are times when I’m not so sure about that,’ she said. ‘Honestly Ben, I don’t know how you run a place as big as The Ponderosa.’

‘Well you forget that I’ve got the boys to help me,’ said Ben, looking around the table proudly. ‘If we can help out at all with anything Katherine, you know you only have to ask.’

‘Thank you,’ she said, laying her hand on his.  The three boys all noticed her display of affection with varying emotions. Adam smiled, Hoss looked embarrassed and Joe glared at her. ‘Actually I was going to ask if you wouldn’t mind me riding up to Bluff Peak and taking a look at the section of land from that angle,’ she continued. ‘I’d like to see it that way.’

‘Of course,’ said Ben. ‘Only you really should have one of us show you the way.  That high country can be a bit tricky. I’m busy tomorrow, but ..’ he gave Joe a quick glance and winked at Katherine. ‘I’m sure Joseph wouldn’t mind showing you, would you Joe?’

Joe looked up at the sound of his name. ‘Huh?’ he said.

‘You wouldn’t mind showing Katherine up to Bluff Peak tomorrow would you son?’

Joe tried not to show his true feelings. ‘Couldn’t Hoss or Adam do it?’ he asked. ‘I’m working on those horses tomorrow.’

‘They can keep until the afternoon,’ said Ben. ‘I’d like you to do it please.’

‘Why?’ Joe couldn’t quite keep the frustration out of his voice.

‘Because I’m asking you,’ said his father meaningfully.

‘If I have to,’ replied Joe somewhat ungraciously. He put his head down and pretended to be interested on what was on his plate, not daring to look at anyone in case his true feelings showed.  There was an awkward silence around the table.

XXXXXXXXXX

‘Ben you shouldn’t have forced him,’ said Katherine as she wrapped her shawl tighter around her body to ward off the chilly air.

‘Nonsense,’ said Ben. ‘I thought it would be a good opportunity for you to have a talk and get to know each other a bit better.  Besides, that boy has to learn to think about other people for a change and not just concentrate on what he wants.’

‘He obviously doesn’t want anything to do with me,’ said Katherine sadly.

‘He just doesn’t know you well yet,’ replied Ben. ‘When he does…’

‘Yes?’

‘Well, when he gets to know you he’ll realise just what a special person you are,’ said Ben, giving her a long look.

She moved over on the buggy seat and sat closer to him. ‘Well thank you,’ she said. ‘What a lovely compliment.’

Ben put his arm around her. ‘Just the truth,’ he said gently. ‘Adam and Hoss know you for what you are and I’m sure that Joseph will come around given time.  After all, he’s his father’s son and he couldn’t help but be smitten with you as well.’

She put her head on his shoulder. ‘As well?’ she said. ‘Does that mean that his father is?’

‘As if you didn’t know that,’ said Ben. ‘I think I’ve made my feelings very clear.’

‘You have,’ she said with a short laugh. ‘But I just like to hear you say it.’

Ben rested his head on top of hers. ‘I think you are an incredible person,’ he said. ‘Intelligent, beautiful and delightful.  Is that good enough for you?’

‘It’s a start.’

‘And I’m very fond of you,’ he said.

‘Just fond?’

‘More than fond,’ he said as he bent down towards her. ‘Very fond.  In fact…’  His words were cut short by their lips meeting and he pulled the horses to a stop and put both his arms around her.

XXXXXXXXXX

‘It’s down there,’ said Joe with a wave of his hand. ‘You can see the boundary by the line of that hill over there.’

Katherine pulled up beside him. ‘I see,’ she said. ‘Perhaps if we got down and walked to those rocks I’d get a clearer view.’

Joe slid down from the saddle without a word and politely helped her down from her horse as well.  He had to admit to being impressed by her horsemanship on the way up here.  For a woman she was an outstanding rider.  He tied both reins to a low branch and led her up towards the rocks.

‘This is much better,’ said Katherine. ‘Does the river mark the other side of it?’

‘Yes.’

‘It’s really beautiful from this angle.’

‘Mmm.’

Katherine glanced at the young man standing beside her. ‘You don’t think so?’ she asked.

Joe shrugged. ‘It’s a fine piece of land,’ he said. ‘You don’t need me to tell you that.’

‘No, I suppose not,’ she admitted. ‘I was just interested in your opinion that’s all.’  Joe shrugged again and looked away. After a moment Katherine tried again. ‘You don’t like me very much do you?’

Joe glanced at her. ‘I don’t really have an opinion one way or the other,’ he said.

‘Oh yes you do. You’ve made it fairly clear that you only tolerate me because of your father,’ Katherine replied.

Joe shrugged again and leant back against the rock behind him as he gazed off into the distance, not feeling inclined to enter into a conversation with her.

‘I’m sorry you feel that way Joseph.’

‘Why?’

‘Because of your father.  He and I are very fond of each other you know, and I’d hate to see our relationship affect him.’

‘We don’t have a relationship,’ said Joe.

‘That’s what I mean,’ she said patiently. ‘Your father would like for us to get on.  I’d like it too.’

Joe stood up straight and faced her. ‘I really don’t care what you’d like,’ he said. ‘You and Pa might be happy with each other but it doesn’t mean that I’ve got to carry on like my brothers do.’

‘Which is?’

‘Falling all over you just to get you to like them and to keep Pa happy.’

‘I would think you’d want to make your father happy,’ Katherine said. ‘He’s done a lot for you, you know.’

Joe frowned at her. ‘You don’t have to lecture me about my Pa,’ he said. ‘It’s none of your business anyway.’

‘Well I think it is my business,’ she said. ‘I’m very fond of your father and anything that affects him is important to me.  Including your behaviour.’

‘Why don’t you just mind your own business,’ said Joe, beginning to feel quite angry with her. ‘You ain’t a part of this family…or is that a part of your plan?’

Katherine stared at him. ‘That is between your father and myself,’ she said.

‘Oh!  So what I do is your business, but what you and Pa do isn’t my business is that it?’

‘That is flawed logic Joseph,’ Katherine said in a haughty tone. ‘I would have thought you might have understood what I am saying, but obviously I was wrong.’

‘Are you calling me dumb or something?’ he asked indignantly.  To be honest, every conversation he had with her made him feel that way.

‘I just thought you would be able to understand what I’m trying to say,’ she repeated. ‘Maybe you’re just too young.’

He put his hands on his hips. ‘Do we have to go through this again?’ he said sarcastically. ‘I told you before I’m grown up!’

‘Well why don’t you start acting like it?  Obviously I’m wasting my breath speaking to you about it,’ she replied and gave him a condescending look. ‘Such childish behaviour Joseph doesn’t warrant recognition.’

Joe continued to glare at her, not quite knowing what to say.  She made him feel so angry, yet unable to express his opinions at all.  He turned on his heel and strode back to his horse, calling over his shoulder. ‘You coming?’

Katherine glared at him and walked over to her own horse. ‘Just ride down as far as the lake with me…I can make it from there,’ she said crossly. ‘I think you and I might be better off apart for a bit.’

‘Suits me fine,’ he replied and turned his horse away from her.

XXXXXXXXXX

Ben stood and watched his son bring the horse to a standstill. ‘Good ride son!’ said Ben, patting Joe on the back as he dusted himself off.

‘Thanks Pa,’ replied his son grinning back at him. ‘He had me going for a while there though.’ He leant against the fence as he stood next to his father and surveyed the horses in front of them. ‘I think I’ll try that black next.’

‘Before you do,’ said Ben, putting his hand on his son’s arm, ‘I’d like to talk to you about something Joe.’  He motioned him over to the house. ‘Come and sit on the porch for a while.’

Joe gave his father an anxious look. ‘What have I done?’ he asked as they walked against the front yard.

Ben put his arm around his son’s shoulder. ‘Nothing.  You’re not in trouble,’ he said.

Joe looked relieved as they sat down. ‘Then what is it?’ he asked.

Ben hesitated for a moment before replying. ‘It’s about Katherine,’ he said, watching the boy carefully for a reaction. He noticed a guarded look instantly cross Joe’s face which he tried to hide.

‘What about her?’ asked Joe, trying to sound casual.

‘I wondered what you thought of her,’ replied his father.

Joe shrugged. ‘She’s OK,’ he said nonchalantly. There was silence for a few moments.

‘I had the impression that you didn’t really like her,’ said Ben.

Joe looked into the distance, obviously avoiding making eye contact with his father. ‘No, I like her OK,’ he said.

‘Joseph if you don’t, then it’s alright,’ said Ben.

Joe looked at his father briefly before turning his face away again. ‘I told you that I did,’ he said carefully. ‘What more do you want me to say?’

Ben raised an eyebrow. ‘I want you to tell me the truth,’ he said. ‘It’s obvious to everyone that you aren’t fond of her and I thought we should talk about it.’

‘Why?’

‘Because I am fond of her and I don’t want this to come between us,’ his father replied.

‘It won’t.’

Ben gave a small sigh.  It seemed that he was getting nowhere with this boy of his and he felt like shaking him. ‘Joe, please look at me.’ Joe reluctantly turned to face his father. ‘I know this must be hard for you…’ began Ben.

‘It ain’t hard,’ said Joe. ‘Anything that makes you happy is OK with me Pa.’

Ben studied his son’s face. ‘Joe, you and your brothers are the most important things in my life and you always will be.  You know that.  But sometimes son, a man needs more.’ Joe flushed slightly.  He didn’t want to be part of this conversation and wished that his father would change the subject. ‘Katherine fills a gap that has been in my life since…well, since your mother died.  She makes me happy and that’s something I’ve really missed during these past few years.  But I don’t want it to be at the expense of what I have with you son.’

Joe smiled at his father. ‘It ain’t Pa,’ he said. ‘I told you it’s OK.’

‘Yes I know you did, but I really don’t think you’re being completely honest with me.  If you’re not comfortable with this, then now is the time to talk about it.’

Joe took a deep breath. ‘I think it’s great that you’re happy with her Pa,’ he said. ‘I’m sure she’s nice.  But I don’t have ta feel the same way do I?’

‘And what way do you feel?’

‘Well…she just makes me feel like…I dunno.  She makes me feel dumb or something.  Like I’m not good enough I reckon.’

Ben frowned. ‘Well I’m sure she doesn’t mean to,’ he said. ‘Katherine likes you son and she wouldn’t want to make you feel any less than you are.’

‘Then why is she always on at me about doing things with my life?’ asked Joe defensively. ‘She’s always saying how she’s done lots of things and carrying on about Adam and all.’

‘What?’ Ben was genuinely surprised to hear his son talk like this.

‘Well it’s like I’m not as good as Adam or Hoss.  Like I’m not matching up to being a Cartwright or something.’

Ben put his arm around his son’s shoulders. ‘Joe I’d never think that,’ he said. ‘And neither does Katherine. It’s just that she’s an educated woman who has made the most of the opportunities she has been given in life and I suppose she doesn’t want you to waste yours.  She’s only thinking of you.’

‘Yeah, well I wish she wouldn’t,’ declared Joe as he stood up. ‘Pa it’s great that you get on with her so well, and I’m happy for you.  But please don’t expect me to feel like you do about her, cause it just ain’t gonna happen. I’ll be polite to her, but more than that I just can’t be.’

Ben stood up next to his son. ‘Well just promise me that you’ll try to get to know her a bit,’ he said. ‘I think you’ll like what you find.’

Joe bit his bottom lip. ‘Alright,’ he said. ‘Can I go back to work now?’

‘Of course.’ Ben watched as his son walked back over to the corral and got straight back onto the black that was waiting for him. The boy rode as if his life depended on it and it was obvious to Ben that all his hidden anger was directed towards the animal. He sighed as he turned back towards the house again.

XXXXXXXXXX

‘Who put that there?’ asked Joe as he reached the bottom of the staircase.

‘Katherine,’ replied Adam, glancing at the huge vase of flowers on the table. ‘Looks nice, don’t you think?’

‘Hmm.  What right has she got to rearrange our house?’ Joe muttered angrily.

Adam looked at him surprised. ‘She’s not rearranging the house,’ he said. ‘She thought they would look nice for us, that’s all.’ Joe didn’t comment further, but sat down on the sofa and stared into the fireplace. ‘What’s wrong with you anyway?’ asked Adam after a moment. ‘She can’t do anything right where you’re concerned.’

‘Darn right!’ declared Joe. He glared into the fire as if it were at fault. ‘She’s getting too bossy around here I reckon.’

‘Joe, you need to grow up,’ said Adam, shaking his head. ‘Can’t you for once put your own feelings aside and think about Pa for a change?’

‘I am thinking about Pa,’ declared Joe. ‘I don’t think she’s any good for him.’

‘Well I disagree,’ replied Adam. ‘And so does Hoss. Anyway Pa’s a big boy and I’m sure he can work out what’s best for himself.’

Joe looked at his brother. ‘Adam, do you think they’re serious about each other?’

‘Yes I do. I haven’t seen him like this for a long time.  Not since your Ma died actually.’ Joe winced at the mention of his mother. ‘Joe, Pa deserves a bit of happiness, don’t you think?’

‘Of course I do,’ Joe replied, still staring into the fire. He stood up and shrugged. ‘Whatever makes him happy I guess. See ya.’

Adam watched thoughtfully as his younger brother left the room. His words had sounded hollow to him, and he wasn’t at all convinced that Joe had meant them.

XXXXXXXXXX

‘They look good together don’t ya think?’

Joe turned to face his brother Hoss and frowned at his words.  ‘I guess so,’ he admitted with a shrug of his shoulders.’

‘What do ya mean…ya think so?’ queried Hoss with a snort. ‘Course they do!’

Joe watched his father and Katherine across the churchyard.  He had to admit that they seemed so right together, much and all as he didn’t like the fact.  Katherine was a tall and stately woman who carried herself extremely well. He had to admit that she was a fine figure of a woman.  She also had an air of confidence about her that few people seemed to find it hard to resist…in fact it seemed that everyone except Joe himself had fallen under her spell.

Even now as she stood beside his father she was the centre of attention with all those who surrounded them and Joe had to admit that she was witty and intelligent. Everyone seemed to be hanging on her every word…including his father.  Joe looked at his Pa’s face and realised that Adam had been right last night.  He hadn’t seen him so animated in a long time and Joe felt a pang of guilt at the thought that perhaps his father hadn’t had the life he deserved in these past few years.  Perhaps what he was seeing now was the true Ben Cartwright.  Lord knows the man deserved some happiness!

Joe resolved to try harder with Katherine for his father’s sake. ‘They sure do look good alright,’ he said thoughtfully. He wandered over to his father and began listening to their conversation.

‘I don’t see why not!’ Katherine was saying. ‘You’d be wonderful Ben!’

Ben smiled. ‘I have enough to do here on the ranch without getting involved in politics Katherine,’ he said. ‘I’m quite happy to leave it to those who know what they’re doing.’

‘But that’s just the point!’ she countered. ‘You have a vested interested in this Territory Ben and it’s up to people like you to see that the best interests of the people are safeguarded.’

‘I agree, said Paul Martin. ‘You should really think about it Ben.’

‘And who would look after my business interests here while I was off on the electoral circuit?’ asked Ben with a laugh. ‘I don’t think it would be fair to leave it all to the boys.’

‘You know perfectly well that Adam is quite capable of taking up any challenge that The Ponderosa could bring,’ said Katherine, smiling at him.  ‘And with Hoss’ help they could run this place quite well for a while.’ Joe scowled as he realised that she hadn’t made mention of him.  He took a step backwards to listen without being noticed.

‘And Joe?’ asked Ben.

‘Well he’s still a boy of course, but surely Adam and Hoss could look after him,’ replied Katherine.

Still a boy of course!  Joe scowled even further. He’d show her just what kind of boy he was!

Ben laughed. ‘Well it’s all academic at the moment,’ he said. ‘I’m not about to jump into politics in a hurry, I can assure you.’  He took Katherine’s arm. ‘Now if we’re going to that picnic we’d better get a move on. We’ll see you there Paul.’

Joe watched as his father led Katherine over to the Cartwright buggy and helped her up. Great! he thought. Now I’ll have to put up with her all day. He sighed as he remembered his new resolve to try a bit harder for the sake of his father. Sometimes life was hard to take and people like Katherine Higgins just served to make it harder.

XXXXXXXXXX

‘These are delicious!’ Katherine exclaimed as she took another sandwich. ‘Hop Sing certainly is a treasure Ben.  I can see why he’s invaluable to you.’

‘Hop Sing’s part of our family,’ said Joe before he could stop himself.  The way she said it, she made Hop Sing sound like a servant and he didn’t like thinking of the cook that way.

Katherine looked at him a moment before replying. ‘I know that Joe,’ she said. ‘I just meant that he’s good at his job.’

‘It ain’t no job for him,’ replied Joe. ‘I told you he’s part of our family.’

Ben put his hand on Joe’s thigh. ‘Katherine knows that Joseph,’ he said gently. ‘She didn’t mean anything by it.’

Joe settled immediately, remembering in time his decision to be polite to the woman. ‘I know,’ he said, turning to his father with a smile. ‘They are good sandwiches.’  He reached for another one to divert his attention and to change the subject before he could lose his temper at the woman.

‘So,’ said Katherine brightly. ‘What are your plans for the afternoon boys?’

Joe scowled when he caught the term boys.  Somehow it sounded different to him than when his father used the expression. He knew that she felt he was still a child and didn’t like her rubbing it in.

Adam smiled. ‘I have plans in town,’ he said.

‘So do I,’ added Joe.

Katherine looked at Ben meaningfully, who said quickly. ‘I think you’d better stick close to home this afternoon Joe.’

Joe frowned. ‘Why?’

‘I don’t like the sound of those characters who’ve been hanging round the saloon lately.  Roy says that they’re looking for trouble and I’d rather you stayed away in case there’s any in there tonight.’

‘Adam’s allowed to go,’ said Joe defensively.

‘Adam is a lot older than you,’ replied his father. ‘He can take care of himself in case of any trouble.’

‘And I can’t?’

‘Joe, they are nasty characters,’ said Katherine. ‘Your father just thinks…’

Joe turned on her. ‘My father can tell me what he thinks himself!’ he retorted.

‘Joseph!’ snapped Ben. ‘That will do!  Katherine told me that the men were…’

‘She told you!’ exploded Joe. ‘So it’s her interfering is it?’

Ben fixed his youngest son with a steely glare. ‘That will do!’ he said. ‘Katherine just happened to mention…’

Joe stood up angrily. ‘And of course whatever she says goes!’ he said unable to control himself. ‘Before she came along we managed ourselves quite well around here!  What has she got to do with anything anyway?’

‘Joe calm down,’ said Hoss. ‘Can’t ya spend the afternoon with me fishing? There’s no need to carry on like this.’

Joe glared around at them all.  It was pointless trying to reason with any of them while she was around, that was clear to see.  He turned on his heel and stomped away. ‘Joseph!’ called his father.

‘Don’t worry,’ replied Joe over his shoulder. ‘I’m going home like a good little boy!’

Ben shook his head as they all watched the youngster stride over to his horse. ‘Well that went well,’ said Adam dryly.

‘Ben, I’m sorry,’ said Katherine. ‘I shouldn’t have become involved. I know it only makes him angry.’

‘You have nothing to apologize for,’ said Ben grimly. ‘He’s old enough to know not to behave like that. I think that boy needs a good talking to.’  There was silence as they all continued to eat.  Somehow the atmosphere had been ruined for them all.

XXXXXXXXXX

Joe hesitated before stepping out of the shadows towards Katherine.  The talk with his father was still fresh in his mind and he wasn’t looking forward to this next conversation, but he knew that it had to be done. Katherine turned at his approach. ‘Hello Joe,’ she said pleasantly. ‘Would you like to sit down?’

Joe sat down on a chair as far away from her on the porch as was possible and there was silence for a few moments while they both looked at the stars. He cleared his throat before speaking. ‘Pa says I have to apologize to you for this afternoon,’ he said. Katherine waited. ‘Sorry,’ he mumbled.

‘That didn’t sound very gracious,’ she said.

He bristled without meaning to. ‘Well what do you want me to say?’ he asked.

‘Joe, I wish you’d realise that I’m not trying to upset you,’ she said. ‘I’m very fond of your father and I’d like to be friends with you, but you’re making this very hard.’

‘I’m making it hard?’ he asked. ‘What about you?’

Katherine sighed. ‘It seems that you and I just aren’t meant to get on at the moment,’ she said. ‘Perhaps we’ll have to think about how to try and fix that.’

‘Yeah,’ he agreed. ‘Maybe you should just stay away for a while.’

‘That’s not what I meant.’

‘Well what do you want then?  I ain’t going anywhere.’

‘I’m not going anywhere,’ she corrected without thinking.

He glared at her. ‘You just can’t help making me feel stupid can you?’ he spat. ‘Why don’t you just leave me and my family alone?’

Katherine turned to face him. ‘I would think that you’d want to try and get on with me for your father’s sake,’ she said.

Joe breathed deeply. ‘I’m trying to,’ he admitted. ‘But seems like I can’t, don’t it?’

‘Doesn’t it,’ she corrected again.

Joe stood up. ‘See what I mean?’ he said angrily. ‘You just can’t help yourself can you?  You think it’s smart or something to keep on at me all the time?’

‘I’m only trying to help you,’ she replied. ‘You’re a smart boy and I think you could make something of yourself if you only tried.  There’s so much more to life for you if only you’d…’

‘Don’t start that again!’ Joe declared. ‘You’re only trying to get rid of me by making me want to go to College ain’t you?  You think that if I go away then you’ll have Pa to yourself!’

Katherine snorted. ‘Hardly to myself.’ she said. ‘Have you forgotten you have two brothers who live here also?’

‘Yeah!  Two brothers who think you’re great! You’d be real happy if I wasn’t around though wouldn’t you?’

Katherine gave him a strange look. ‘I’m only thinking of your father Joe,’ she said. ‘You must admit he is happy in my company.  This tension is not helping him you know.’

Joe glared at her. ‘Are you suggesting that Pa would be happy if I left?’ he asked incredulously.

‘Of course he wouldn’t say that,’ she said carefully. ‘But he is feeling the strain of it all somewhat.’

Joe was silent for a moment. ‘Pa would never want me to leave here,’ he said quietly.

‘Of course he would only want what’s best for you Joe,’ she replied.  ‘You heard him say himself that he’d love for you to go to College.’

Joe was silent again, suddenly feeling on unsafe ground. ‘Well all I know is that you ain’t helping the situation around here,’ he said finally.

‘I think it’s you who isn’t helping Joe,’ retorted Katherine. ‘Why don’t you think of your father’s happiness for a change?’  She smiled to herself, happy to have planted a seed in the boy’s brain. ‘Well, you think about it,’ she said. ‘It could work out well for all of us if you decide what I think you should.’

Joe turned from her and strode into the house again. Katherine sat back in her chair with a deep contented sigh. Suddenly things were looking better again.

XXXXXXXXXX

‘What’s wrong with you?’ asked Adam as he watched his youngest brother leaning against the rake in his hand and staring off into the distance, obviously deep in thought.

Joe looked around startled. ‘Huh?’ he said. ‘Oh…nothing.  Just thinking is all.’  He bent down and began to rake out the stall again. After a moment he stopped and faced his brother. ‘Hey Adam?’

‘Yes?’

‘Do you think Pa really wants me to go to College?’

Adam shrugged. ‘You heard him say that he did. He understands if you don’t want to though.’

‘Yeah, but he’d be happy if I did wouldn’t he?’

‘I suppose so.’  Adam looked at his brother carefully. ‘Why do you ask?  You aren’t reconsidering are you?’

Joe shrugged his shoulders. ‘I don’t think so,’ he said. ‘But if I did, what sort of things do they offer that I might like?’

Adam sat down on a barrel. ‘Well… there’s Agriculture and…maybe some sort of business course.  I think you’d want to look at something you could use back here on the ranch don’t you?’

‘Guess so.’

‘You don’t sound too enthusiastic about it.  What’s brought all this on so suddenly?’

‘It ain’t sudden,’ said Joe defensively. ‘Pa’s always talking about it.  Specially when she’s around!’

Adam didn’t have to ask who she was. ‘So this has something to do with Katherine then?’ he asked.

Joe shrugged again. ‘She said that I should think about it.’

‘She’s been saying that for quite a while.  Why all of a sudden is it important to you?’

Joe took a deep breath. ‘We ain’t getting on Adam.  Much and all as I try to, she just makes me feel …stupid or something.  She just makes me so mad at her!  She said that it’s not fair to her and Pa to have me around feeling like this.’

Adam frowned. ‘Katherine said that?

‘Well not in so many words,’ explained Joe. ‘But that’s what she meant.’

‘And so you thought you should go to College to make it easier for Pa?’

Joe nodded. ‘Sorta,’ he admitted.

Adam stood up again. ‘Well I don’t think that’s the right reason to go,’ he said. ‘Fair enough if you want to Joe, but you obviously aren’t keen on it.  Pa wouldn’t want it to happen like this and you know it.’

‘Maybe.  But what else can I do?  She sure ain’t going anywhere!’

Perhaps you should try to get to know her before you give up on her,’ suggested Adam. ‘You might be pleasantly surprised.’

Joe’s face didn’t look too hopeful. ‘That’s what Pa said,’ he replied.

‘Well I think he’s right.  What have you got to lose?’

Joe sighed. ‘My temper,’ he mumbled.

Adam laughed and patted him on the shoulder. ‘So what’s new?’ he asked with a twinkle in his eye.  ‘If Katherine’s going to stay around here then she’ll have to get used to that, don’t you think?’

Joe smiled in spite of himself. ‘Yeah, I guess so,’ he said. ‘Well, I’ll try to get to know her a bit, but it ain’t gonna be easy.’

‘Life wasn’t meant to be easy,’ replied Adam wisely. ‘Now get back to work buddy, or you’ll find life is a whole lot harder without those chores of yours done.’  He patted Joe on the back again and walked out of the barn whistling.  Joe shook his head and turned back to his work again.

XXXXXXXXXX

‘Joe!’ said Katherine in surprise as she opened her front door. ‘What are you doing here?  Is everything all right with your father?’  She looked at the youngster anxiously.

Joe fiddled with his hat nervously and ran his fingers through his hair. ‘Yeah,’ he said. ‘Everything’s fine.’  They looked at each other in silence for a moment before he continued. ‘I just thought….I mean…I came for a visit, that’s all.’

Katherine raised her eyebrows. ‘Really?’ she said in surprise. ‘Well… this is nice. Um… come in.’

Joe entered the house and looked around him.  It was the first time he had ever been there and it was much as he had imagined.  Tastefully decorated and well ordered. ‘This is nice,’ he said politely.

Katherine looked at him strangely. ‘Thank you,’ she said. ‘Have a seat.’  They sat for a few moments in silence, until finally Katherine broke the ice. ‘May I offer you a drink?’

‘Thanks,’ he said.  As she left the room he sighed and ran his hand through his hair again.  Maybe this had been a mistake?  He didn’t feel at all comfortable here and wanted nothing more than to get out before she returned, but he knew that he owed it to his father to at least try and go through with it.  By the time Katherine returned he was resigned to doing his best to communicate with her.

;Thanks,’ he said as he took the coffee from her, glad to have something to focus on.

‘So do what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?’ Katherine asked pleasantly, although Joe swore he heard an edge to her voice.

Joe shrugged. ‘No reason,’ he said. ‘I just…I mean, I told Pa that I’d try and get to know you a bit, so I’ve come to do it.’

Katherine laughed. ‘Well I’ll say this much for you Joe, you don’t beat around the bush do you?’

Joe frowned at her. ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’ he asked, feeling slightly miffed.  He felt as if she were putting him down with the comment.

‘Nothing,’ she said pleasantly. ‘I think it’s a good idea for us to have a talk, especially if we’re going to be seeing a lot more of each other in the future.  That is, unless you’ve thought over our conversation the other night about going to College.’

Joe put the College remark to one side for the moment. ‘What do you mean we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other?’ he asked.

Katherine gave him another smile. ‘Well I think that might be for your father to discuss with you,’ she said easily. ‘Let’s just say that I’m hoping I might become a bigger part of The Ponderosa soon.’

‘What you’re trying to say is that you’ve got your eye on my father ain’t it?’ said Joe, narrowing his eyes.

‘Now Joe, that can’t surely be a surprise to you can it?’ Katherine said innocently. ‘After all, we’ve been seeing quite a lot of each other lately.’

‘My Pa wouldn’t bring you into our family without discussing it with us first,’ said Joe.

‘Of course he wouldn’t,’ she replied as she sipped her coffee calmly. ‘I’m just suggesting that you might expect a talk with him soon.’  She studied the boy sitting opposite her. ‘I don’t suppose that will please you greatly?’

Joe said nothing, but stared into his coffee cup. Katherine sat forward. ‘It would make your father very happy though,’ she said. ‘I have a feeling that once I become part of your family Joe, your father will begin to see things my way.’

Joe glared at her.  This visit was not going as he had expected. ‘Which is?’ he asked.

‘I think your father is a wonderful man.  I’ve waited a long time to have a man like him in my life and I mean to make the most of our life together,’ Katherine said. ‘The way I see it, he’s a man with so much to give.  He’s somewhat wasted here you know.’

‘You mean you want him to go into politics,’ said Joe.

‘My!  You’re more perceptive than I thought!’ replied Katherine. ‘Well politics would be an option, but there are many things your father could do with the right guidance. ‘Who knows what we can achieve together?’  She gave a satisfied smile.

‘’You mean away from The Ponderosa and us don’t you?’ said Joe, feeling his temper beginning to rise.  How dare this woman plan things for his father in this way!

‘Well I’m sure we’d be here for some of the time,’ she said calmly.  ‘Your father does love it so.  But he just needs to understand that there’s so much more to life than what he has here.  A man with his intelligence and money…why who knows what our future could be?’

Joe stood up. ‘Why don’t you just leave him alone?’ he said angrily. ‘My Pa doesn’t need someone like you in his life.’

She gave him an amused look. ‘I think that’s for him to make up his mind about don’t you Joe? Let’s see what he decides.’

He gave her a withering glance. ‘Yeah, let’s!’ he said sarcastically. ‘I think I’ve got to know you quite enough thanks.  I’ll let myself out.’

Katherine continued to smile as the boy left the room. It was true that she’d never met anyone as fascinating as Ben Cartwright and she had no intention of giving him up.  If that boy of his got in the way, then she’d just have to find a way to deal with him.

XXXXXXXXXX

‘So how did you go?’ asked Ben as he entered Joe’s bedroom. ‘Did you feel that you got to know Katherine a bit better?’

Joe avoided his father’s eyes and looked out of the window. ‘Yeah I certainly did,’ he said.

Ben sat down on the bed and looked at his son standing by the window. ‘So?’

Joe shrugged, still avoiding his father’s eyes. ‘So what?’

‘So did you get on any better? asked Ben, trying to keep patience with his son.

Joe shrugged. ‘No we didn’t,’ he said quietly. ‘I tried Pa, really I did.  But …well I just can’t like her.’

Ben sighed as he fiddled with the quilt on the bed. ‘Well that’s unfortunate,’ he said. ‘I was really hoping you would Joe.  You see…’  he stopped, unsure of how to express himself.

Joe turned to face him. ‘You’re going to marry her aren’t you?’ he said.

Ben looked up at his son. ‘Yes…I’m thinking of asking her.’

Joe turned and stared out of the window again. There was silence in room.  Ben stood and walked over to his son and put his hand on his shoulder. ‘I know that bothers you Joe,’ he said quietly. ‘But it’s like I said before son. I love you and your brothers very much and I don’t want to do something that’s going to upset you.  To be honest I would have asked her quite a while ago if it weren’t for the fact that you don’t seem to get on with her, but there comes a time when a man has to do what’s right for him.  I hope you can understand Joe.’

‘She’s not right for you Pa,’ said Joe in the same low voice. ‘I know it.’

Ben frowned. ‘Joe, you can’t expect everyone to feel about things the same way that you do.  Katherine is very special to me and I’d like to think that in time you and her will solve your differences. In the meantime I do believe that we can all make a life together here on The Ponderosa if you would just try for my sake.’

‘I have tried Pa.  But that’s just the problem.  She don’t want you to be here with us anymore.  She wants you to go off and be in politics or something.’

Ben laughed. ‘Whatever makes you think that?’ he said.

Joe looked his father directly in the eye for the first time. ‘She said so,’ he replied. ‘She said that you and her are gonna be busy with all sorts of things away from The Ponderosa.’

‘Well I think I would know if that were the case don’t you?’ replied Ben. ‘I know that Katherine is keen for me to become involved in things outside the ranch, but I’m the one who will be making those decisions about my life son, not her.’  He massaged the back of his son’s neck. ‘Joe nothing will change around here.  I promise you son I will still be your Pa in just the same way I’ve always been.  The only difference will be that we’ll have an addition to our family…and I believe that she will be a wonderful addition.’

Joe stood silently for a few moments before speaking. ‘You can think that if you like Pa,’ he said finally. ‘Just please don’t ask me to believe it.’

Ben gave him a frustrated look. ‘Joseph I can’t stop living my life my way just because you want me to,’ he said and stole a glance at the picture of Joe’s mother on his dresser. ‘Loving Katherine doesn’t mean that I love your mother any less, just as I never stopped loving Adam and Hoss’ mothers when I married yours.’

‘I know.’

‘And you have to learn to grow up a bit now Joe.  You and your brothers have had me to yourselves for a long time now.  I need to do this with my life and I need you to understand it.  But if you don’t approve of Katherine, then I can’t change that.  All I’m asking is that you understand why I’m doing it.’

Joe’s eyes welled up with tears.  ‘I never wanted to hurt you Pa,’ he said softly. ‘I do want you to be happy.’

Ben pulled his son towards him. ‘I am happy Joseph,’ he said. ‘Truly I am.  Let’s just hope that in time you can be truly happy for me too.’

Joe nodded and tried to smile at his father. ‘Sure Pa,’ he said. ‘I’ll give it my best shot.’

Ben patted his son’s neck again. ‘That’s my boy,’ he said. ‘I knew that I could count on you. Now how about we go downstairs before Hop Sing throws all our supper away?’

Joe wiped his eyes on the sleeve of his jacket. ‘Or Hoss eats it,’ he said. ‘I am kinda hungry.’  Father and son linked their arms around each other and headed out of the room.

XXXXXXXXXX

Ben put his arms around Katherine and held her close. ‘Ben,’ she said. ‘What will the boys think?’

He laughed. ‘They’ll think their father is showing some affection to their future step-mother, that’s all,’ he said. ‘After all, it isn’t every night we have a celebration of this kind on The Ponderosa.’  He glanced at the table next to them. ‘Everything looks beautiful darling, you’ve done a wonderful job.’

She looked up and kissed him. ‘Thank you,’ she said. ‘And just you wait until you see what Hop Sing has prepared.  I spent a very long time giving him instructions on exactly what was needed for the meal.’

Ben raised his eyebrows. ‘And you got away with it?’ he asked. ‘I’m surprised that he let you tell him what to do.’

Katherine frowned at him. ‘Well why wouldn’t he?’ she asked surprised. ‘I’m in charge now, not him.’

Ben frowned slightly. ‘Well it’s just that Hop Sing has been in control in the kitchen around here for a long time,’ he explained. ‘It might take him a bit of time to get used to having a woman around.’

Katherine smiled sweetly at him. ‘Well he’ll have to,’ she said in a determined voice. ‘Now that I’ll be living here we’ll just have to get along won’t we?  Everyone will have to get along.’

‘I’ve spoken to Joseph if that’s who you’re referring to,’ said Ben. ‘Don’t worry.  I’m sure that everything will work out in time.’

‘I certainly hope so,’ she replied. ‘Otherwise things could become very difficult.’

‘Ah here are the boys now,’ said Ben, turning towards the staircase where Adam, Hoss and Joe were appearing. ‘Come on down boys and we’ll have a pre-dinner drink to the latest addition to our family.

Adam gave Katherine a smile as he headed towards the drinks tray and began to pour five glasses.  He handed them around to everyone graciously as they all listened to Ben’s words. ‘Here’s to my beautiful Katherine,’ he said. ‘May she bring joy and happiness to all our lives for a long time to come.’

Adam gave Joe a hard glance, but his youngest brother didn’t flinch.  He was determined not to spoil this night for his father, even if he felt so wrong about the match and so he stood in silence and tried to smile.

‘To Katherine,’ said Adam, beaming at her

‘Ma’am,’ added Hoss with a nod of his head and a twinkle in his eye.

There was silence for a moment while everyone waited for Joe to say something. Finally, Katherine smiled around at them all. ‘Thank you,’ she said. ‘I’m sure we’re all going to be very happy together.’

At that moment Hop Sing entered the room and announced that dinner was ready.  ‘May I escort you to the table?’ asked Ben as he offered Katherine his arm.

‘Thank you sir,’ she replied graciously.

As they all headed towards the table, Joe made to go to his usual spot next to his father, but Katherine put a hand on his arm to stop him. ‘If you don’t mind Joe,’ she said. ‘I thought it would be appropriate for me to sit here now.  Would you mind sitting over there next to Hoss?’

Joe swallowed before he could make a reply that he might regret. ‘Sure,’ he said. ‘I don’t mind.’  He sat down on the other side of Hoss, feeling quite sad to think that he wasn’t getting to sit next to his father as he had done for as long as he could remember.  No one else seemed to realise the slight though, and he held his head high and tried to ignore his feelings on the matter.  If Katherine were going to be part of their family now, he’d have to get used to much worse than this for his father’s sake.

‘So when is the wedding going to be?’ asked Adam as Hop Sing came in with the first course.

‘We haven’t really discussed it yet,’ said Ben. ‘Thank you Hop Sing.’  He raised his eyebrows at the contents of the platter in front of him.

‘I thought June would be nice,’ said Katherine. ‘If that suits you dear.’

Ben looked momentarily startled. ‘Oh.  Well yes, we’ll discuss it of course’ he said. ‘June sounds nice though.’

‘I’m glad you think so.  I’ve already written to several places to find out about the availability of accommodation for our wedding trip.’

‘We haven’t talked about where we’ll go yet though,’ replied Ben.

Katherine put a hand on his arm. ‘Of course we will darling.  It’s just that I wanted to be prepared.  I don’t want us to miss out on the best places you know.’

Ben smiled at her, but said nothing. He picked up the platter and passed it to Hoss who looked at it suspiciously. ‘What’s this?’ he asked.

‘It’s a seafood platter,’ said Katherine. ‘I ordered it especially.  I thought it was about time you tried a few different things around here.’

Hoss continued to look at the food suspiciously. ‘What’s them things?’ he asked.

Adam laughed. ‘They’re oysters,’ he explained. ‘Try one and see if you like it.’

Hoss took a shell and scooped out the oyster.  He put it into his mouth and chewed for a moment before replying. ‘It ain’t bad,’ he said. ‘Different though.’

Ben smiled at Katherine. ‘Hoss and Joe haven’t had much opportunity to try seafood,’ he said.

And we don’t want to!  thought Joe, trying not to scowl. We don’t need all that fancy stuff around here just because she decided we do!

‘Here Joe, try some,’ offered Katherine.

‘No thanks,’ replied Joe.

‘You won’t know if you like it until you try it,’ she urged.

‘I don’t want it,’ he replied, then added reluctantly. ‘Thank you anyway.’

‘Joe’s not much of an eater,’ said Ben as he noticed Katherine’s expression.

‘Well I’ll have it,’ interrupted Adam, taking the platter. ‘I love seafood.’

Katherine gave him a dazzling smile. ‘I suppose you indulged in many fine foods during your years in Boston,’ she said. ‘Now there’s a city!  I remember one time…’

Joe scowled at his plate as he heard the two of them talking about the delights of Boston.  He supposed it would always be like this from now on and wondered how Hoss would cope with it.  Surprisingly, his brother seemed to be alright with it all.  Joe glanced at him and noticed him piling his plate with the seafood and listening intently to his brother and Katherine.  Pa of course was in his element, so once again Joe felt completely left out of the conversation.

He held his glass out for another drink as Hoss offered the wine decanter to him and was startled to hear Katherine say. ‘Do you think that’s wise Joe?’

Joe looked at her startled. ‘Huh?’ he said.

‘You’ve already had one drink.  You’re only seventeen after all.’

‘So?’

‘I think Katherine’s right Joe,’ said his father pleasantly. ‘One drink is enough for a boy your age.’

Joe opened his mouth to object and then closed it again.  He wouldn’t give her the satisfaction of knowing that she’d got to him again. He sighed and hoped that the time between now and June would go as slowly as possible.

XXXXXXXXXX

Joe entered the house, glad that the evening was over and he didn’t have to sit and listen to Katherine any more.  As soon as dinner was over he had escaped to the barn, using Cochise as an excuse.  The horse had thrown a shoe that afternoon and it seemed like a perfect reason to miss out on some of Katherine’s boring talk.  He’d only have ended up losing his temper with her and he was anxious to avoid that at all costs.

As he closed the door he was startled to see Katherine sitting on the sofa by herself. ‘I thought you’d have left by now,’ he said, none too pleasantly.

‘Your father is upstairs getting his coat,’ she replied. ‘He’s going to take me home in the buggy.’

Joe nodded at her, but didn’t comment.  ‘Night,’ he said and crossed to the staircase.

‘Joe I hope you didn’t take offence with my comment about that drink tonight,’ she said.

Joe stopped. ‘Well actually I did. I don’t see what business is it of yours how much I drink,’ he said in a low voice. ‘Next time I’d appreciate it if you’d keep your comments to yourself.’

‘Anything you do is my business from now on,’ Katherine replied sweetly. ‘Your behaviour affects your father and therefore me.  You’d better get used to my comments from now on.’

Joe turned to face her. ‘Really?  Well you’re not a part of this family yet and until you are you can just keep out of my life!’

Katherine stood up and straightened to her full height. ‘I’m not used to being spoken to like that!’ she said haughtily.

‘Well get used to it then!’ replied Joe before he could stop himself.

She took a step closer to him. ‘I think you should apologize for that comment,’ she said.

Joe smirked at her, all his resolve to keep his temper forgotten. ‘Yeah right!’ he said.

He made to move away from her, but she grabbed him by the arm and held onto it. ‘I told you to apologize!’ she said angrily. Joe tried to shake off her arm, but she held it tightly. He smirked at her again and was startled when she lifted her hand and struck him smartly across the cheek.  Joe’s eyes widened in surprise and he stared at her, not knowing what to say or do.  Behind him he heard a step on the stairs and both he and Katherine turned to see Ben standing there.

‘How long have you been there?’ asked Katherine sweetly.

‘Long enough,’ replied Ben, his eyes glued to Joe. ‘I thought you understood how important it is to me for you to at least make some kind of effort with Katherine Joseph?’

Joe swallowed, not knowing what to say to his father. Finally he said in a low voice, ‘Sorry.’

‘I’m not the one you should be apologising to,’ said Ben.

Joe stared at his father in disbelief. ‘What?’ he said.

‘You heard me.’

Joe lowered his head and counted to five.  Slowly he turned to face Katherine. ‘Sorry,’ he said as he glared at her, aware that his father couldn’t see his face.

‘I accept your apology Joe,’ replied Katherine and gave Ben a sweet smile. ‘I think it would be best if we were to go now Ben.  ‘Good night Joe.’

Joe watched them leave with a sinking feeling in his heart.  It seemed like where his father was concerned he just couldn’t win lately.  Not while she was around anyway.  Why couldn’t his Pa see what she was really like?  The man just seemed to be blinded by his feelings for the woman and Joe could only see it getting worse.

XXXXXXXXXX

‘Thank you darling,’ said Katherine as she cuddled into Ben in the buggy. ‘You came along just in time.’

‘So it would seem,’ he replied in a short voice.

Katherine glanced up at him, unsure of his mood. ‘I’m sure Joe didn’t really mean things to go that far,’ she said pleasantly.

‘Did you?’

‘What do you mean?’

‘I really don’t think there was any need to hit the boy like that,’ he said shortly.  ‘If my son needs to be disciplined I’ll do it myself.’

There was silence for a moment. ‘Darling I’m sorry,’ Katherine said finally. ‘It seems like I’ve overstepped the mark somewhat doesn’t it? I honestly didn’t mean to.’

‘Katherine I know that Joseph can be a very stubborn boy, but I’ve told you how hard all this is for him.  I really think he needs understanding, not treatment like I witnessed tonight.’

Katherine opened her mouth in surprise.  It was the first time Ben had ever admonished her and she found that she didn’t like it one bit. ‘Well I’m sorry!’ she said shortly. ‘It just seems to me that the boy needs to develop some manners.’

‘As I said, he’s my son and I’ll deal with him,’ replied Ben.

‘So even though I’m to be your wife, I’m to have nothing to do with your sons?’ she asked angrily. ‘What kind of a marriage is that?’

‘That’s not what I meant,’ replied Ben. He pulled the horses to a halt and turned to face her. ‘Katherine it’s just that…well, the boys and I have been on our own now for a long time.  There’s going to have to be adjustments on all sides.  Joe in particular has never really had a mother in his life and you’re going to need to take it slowly with him. The way you treated him tonight is not going to help your cause. You’ve never been through anything like this and I just want to help you with the benefit of my experience as a parent.  I know that boy very well and he’ll be won over if you will just handle him in the right way.’

Katherine sat in silence while Ben spoke.  When he had finished she took a deep breath, aware that he was watching her intently for her reaction to his words. ‘I understand what you’re saying Ben, but I just can’t tolerate being spoken to like that.’

‘And I will deal with the boy. But it doesn’t mean that you have the right to treat him as you did.’

Katherine bent her head onto his shoulder.  ‘Let’s just forget it Ben.  I’m sorry I did what I did and there’s an end to it.  I trust you to deal with Joe and I’ll do my best not to let it happen again.  Is that good enough for you darling?’

He kissed her on the top of her head. ‘I promise it will get better,’ he said in a softer tone.

She smiled up at him. ‘If I have your support I know it will,’ she said softly. ‘I love you Ben.’

‘I love you too,’ he said. As he hitched up the horses again, Katherine smiled to herself.  It was obvious that she would have to be a little more careful in the future, but she was determined that nothing would get in the way of her happiness.  Ben Cartwright was hers, and nothing…not even his son…would take him away from her. She would just have to be a bit more careful in future.

XXXXXXXXXX

Joe was surprised the next morning when his father made no mention of the incident from the night before.  He had expected at the very least a lecture about it and couldn’t believe it when Ben acted as if it just hadn’t happened.

Ben sensed Joe’s puzzlement and decided to let the boy think about his behaviour without commenting on it.  As far as he was concerned there had been faults on both sides and he figured that the apology that Joe had been forced to make was enough punishment for him.  Besides, he really didn’t inclined to go over it again and dredge up other issues from the evening.  The atmosphere had been tense enough without reliving it.

‘I won’t be home for supper this evening boys,’ said Ben as they finished up their breakfast.  ‘I’ll be dining with Katherine at her place.’

‘Is that proper Pa?’ asked Adam with a wink at Hoss. ‘I mean, I know that you’re engaged and all…but dinner alone with a lady?’ He grinned at his father who pretended to be offended by his son’s statement.

‘For your information I won’t be dining alone with Katherine,’ he said. ‘Her cousin arrived form San Francisco today and he’ll be joining us.’ He stood up and pretended to swat Adam on the head. ‘Not that it’s any of your business.’

Adam and Hoss laughed as their father left the room. ‘Guess we’ll haveta get used to Pa being away from here for meals a fair bit between now and June,’ commented Hoss.

‘Guess so,’ said Adam. ‘The sooner they get married the better.’

‘That’s your opinion,’ said Joe sulkily.

‘Don’t start that again,’ replied Adam. ‘I think it’s about time you changed your attitude.  Personally I think Pa’s being too lenient with you.’

Joe gave his brother a dark look and stood up to leave the table. ‘Well just you both remember what I said,’ he replied. ‘No good will come to this family through her!’ He stormed out and slammed the door behind him, leaving his brothers shaking their heads behind him.

XXXXXXXXXX

‘How do you do?’ said Martin Higgins as he held out his hand to Ben. ‘I’m glad to meet you at last. Katherine has written often about you.’

Ben took the man’s hand. ‘Pleased to meet you,’ he said. ‘I hope it was all good?’

‘Of course darling,’ interrupted Katherine. ‘In fact Martin has really been looking forward to meeting you Ben. He’s a lawyer you know and I thought you might have quite a bit in common.’

Ben raised his eyebrows. ‘Really?’ he asked. ‘I don’t see what.  I’m a rancher, not a lawyer.’

‘Ah yes, but you both have an interest in politics,’ she replied.

‘Katherine tells me that you’re interested in becoming more involved in public affairs,’ said Martin pleasantly.

‘Well I have an interest,’ replied Ben,’ but I wouldn’t really say I was looking to become more involved.’

‘Darling you’re too modest!’ Katherine said with a smile. ‘He’d really make an ideal addition to your cause Martin,’ she said. ‘See if you can convince him will you?’

‘Well if he’s really not that interested…’ began Martin, looking a bit embarrassed.

‘I’m not,’ said Ben firmly, giving Katherine a meaningful look.

‘Nonsense,’ she replied. ‘After we’re married we’ll be able to visit San Francisco quite a bit and it makes sense to become involved if you can.  There’s quite a bit you could do for this Territory from there you know Ben.’

Ben fixed her with a steely glare. ‘I said I’m not interested,’ he said, before turning to Martin. ‘My ranch keeps me quite busy,’ he explained. ‘As well as my boys.’

‘I’m sure,’ said the man pleasantly. ‘You will have to visit me in San Francisco when you come though.’

‘Oh we will,’ said Katherine. ‘Won’t we darling? I suppose we’ll get up there quite a bit.’

Ben said nothing.

‘In fact, I’ve been thinking we should get a place there ourselves for when we are in town.  Why don’t you look around for us Martin and see if you can get an idea of the current value of properties?’

Martin looked embarrassed. ‘Well…’ he said, looking at Ben. ‘That would depend…sometimes it’s best to search these things out for yourself.’

‘I’m really not in the market to buy anything,’ said Ben shortly. ‘When I come it’s usually only for short visits and there are some excellent hotels there.’

‘Yes but darling if we intend to go more frequently I think it makes sense to buy don’t you?’ asked Katherine.

‘No I don’t,’ he replied. ‘’I’m sorry Martin, but I’m really not interested.’

There was an uncomfortable silence for a moment until Katherine stood up. ‘Well I’ll see if dinner is ready,’ she said and left the room.

‘I’m sorry about that,’ said Martin, leaning forward. ‘None of that was my idea.  My cousin can be quite forceful when she wants to, as I’m sure you’ve found out.’

‘I’m beginning to realise that,’ said Ben. ‘Please think nothing of it.’ Katherine’s comments had made him begin to wonder and after the meal was over and Martin had excused himself, Ben decided to broach the subject again with Katherine.

‘What makes you so determined to get me involved in politics?’ he asked as they were seated in front of her fireplace. ‘I’ve told you I’m not really interested and I wish you’d listen to me.’

‘But I am listening darling,’ she said with wide eyes. ‘It’s just that I don’t think you understand just how good you’d be at it. Why, this place needs someone like you to stand up for the citizens around here and help the area to develop. Lord knows that something should be done about it.’

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’ he asked.

‘Well you must admit it is a bit of a backwater,’ she said pleasantly. ‘I know that you enjoy living here Ben, but to be honest I just don’t see what the fascination is for a man like you.’

‘A man like me?’ he asked.

‘Yes.  You’re far too intelligent and worldly to be happy here for the rest of your life,’ she said. ‘I think it’s fine for short periods of time, but we’d be much happier in a city you must admit.’

‘No I don’t know that,’ he said curtly. ‘You might be, but I wouldn’t.’

She put her arm through his. ‘Darling don’t get cross with me,’ she said. ‘Of course we’ll live wherever you want.  It’s just that I think you could do so much more with your life, that’s all.’

Ben stood up. ‘I’m doing exactly what I want with my life,’ he said. ‘The Ponderosa is enough for me and I wish you’d stop interfering.’

‘I’m sorry,’ she said. ‘I know you’re happy here. I just thought that when we’re away from the ranch you should fill in your time with something worthwhile, that’s all.’

Ben nodded his head. ‘So my work here isn’t worthwhile?’ he said.

She shrugged her shoulders. ‘Well it’s all very nice,’ she said. ‘You’ve built up a wonderful business here and I’m sure you feel a great sense of achievement.  But there’s more to life than just The Ponderosa you know.  I could never be happy being completely confined to the ranch.’

‘Well then maybe you’d be happier without being confined there as you put it,’ he said shortly. ‘Somehow I don’t think you and I want the same things in life Katherine and it’s better that we find out now rather than after we’re married.’

Katherine paled at his words. ‘What do you mean?’ she said.

‘I mean that perhaps we should re think this whole marriage thing,’ he said. ‘I’m too independent to be told how to live my life by anyone, even a wife.’

‘I’m not telling you how to live your life!’ she declared, standing up next to him.

‘Oh yes you are!’ he replied. ‘You constantly try and get me involved in politics, you embarrass your own cousin by bringing him here and trying to have him organise a career and a house for me…why you’ve even started making arrangements for the wedding and a trip afterwards without even consulting me!  If that’s not organising my life I don’t know what is!’

‘I didn’t mean to,’ she said. ‘It’s just that I’m used to being in charge of myself, that’s all. I’m independent as well you know!’

‘And somehow I don’t think the two will mix,’ he said. ‘If this is what’s happening before we’re even married, then I hate to think of how we’ll be afterwards.’

She frowned at him. ‘And of course there’s that precious boy of yours as well isn’t there?’ she said. ‘I’m sure he’s got something to do with this sudden change of heart!’

‘I take it you’re referring to Joseph?’ he said frostily.

‘Who else?’ she said with a nasty tinge to her voice. ‘Since the day he met me that boy has been determined to split us up! Well it looks as if he’s been successful after all doesn’t it?’

‘I do not need my son to tell me that this isn’t right,’ said Ben, turning away from her. ‘And for your information this isn’t a sudden change of heart. Perhaps I should have taken more notice of the boy in the first place.’  He picked up his hat. ‘Good evening,’ he said. ‘I’m sure you’ll understand if I don’t call on you again?’

He left the room, shutting the door quietly behind him.  Katherine sat for a moment on the sofa without moving, then angrily picked up a cushion and threw it across the room in a fit of temper. ‘Damn you Ben Cartwright!’ she hissed. ‘We could have been so good together!’

XXXXXXXXXX

‘I wondered why you weren’t at breakfast,’ said Ben as he sat down next to Joe on the grassy knoll overlooking the lake. ‘I thought I might find you here.’

Joe turned to smile at his father. ‘I wasn’t hungry,’ he said. ‘I just came here to think.’

Ben nodded as he looked around.  Here next to Joe’s mother’s grave was his favourite place as well and he knew that they both found great peace up here.

‘Pa?’ said Joe, turning to his father.

‘Yes son?’

‘I’ve been thinking about things and I need to talk to you about something.’

‘I need to talk to you about something as well,’ said Ben.

‘I’ve made a decision,’ continued  Joe. ‘Things aren’t gonna work out between me and Katherine, you know that as well as I do.’

‘Joe…’

Joe put his hand up. ‘Please let me just say it Pa,’ he said. ‘Well I don’t want any trouble about it when she moves in, so I was thinking I might go to College after all.’

‘Joe there’s no need…’

‘But there is!’ he said. ‘I’ll end up making you and me both miserable.  You know what my temper’s like!’

Ben smiled at him. ‘You’d really go to College to make things better for me?’ he asked.

‘Yeah.  I think I should.’

‘There’s no need to Joe,’ said Ben quietly. ‘Katherine won’t be moving in.’

Joe looked at his father puzzled. ‘Why not?’

Ben stared over the water in front of him. ‘We’re not getting married after all,’ he said quietly.

Joe looked shocked. ‘What?’ he said. ‘Pa…you don’t haveta do this!  I promise that I won’t make it hard for you.  I’ll go away, honest I will and she won’t…’

Ben shook his head. ‘It’s decided Joe,’ he said. ‘We’re not getting married son.’

Joe shook his head. ‘Pa please… I’d never forgive myself if I let you do this because of me!  I don’t want…’

‘It’s nothing to do with you,’ interrupted Ben. ‘I decided it last night.  It’s because of other things Joe, not you.’  Joe stared at his father silently. ‘It just wasn’t going to work son. We’re two different people with different views on life and it wasn’t going to work.’

‘Pa I’m sorry.’

Ben gave his son a gentle smile. ‘So am I Joseph,’ he said quietly.

‘Are you sure about it?’

Ben sighed and glanced at the stone marker beside him. ‘Son it’s like this.  When I was married to your mother I knew that she wanted me to live my life for myself. Whereas with Katherine it was as if she wanted me to live it for her.  There’s a big difference between those two attitudes and the difference is what makes a love a true one. There would have ended up being two very unhappy people in our house if we’d gone through with it.’

‘Three,’ said Joe.

Ben gave a short laugh. ‘Yes.  Three,’ he said. ‘So no more talk of College?’

Joe shook his head. ‘No.  No more talk of College,’ he replied. ‘You don’t really mind do you?’

Ben rubbed the back of his son’s neck thoughtfully. ‘I don’t mind at all,’ he said. ‘You live your life the way you want to Joe,’ he said. ‘Just as I intend to live mine.’

Joe sprang to his feet. ‘You know what Pa?’ he said.

‘No, what?’

‘I’m hungry all of a sudden!’

Ben laughed. ‘Well I wouldn’t count on there being any breakfast left after your two brothers have had theirs,’ he said.

‘Well I’ll just haveta convince Hop Sing to make some extra then won’t I?’ declared Joe happily. ‘Come on!’  He bounded over to his horse and climbed up into the saddle. ‘Come on Pa!’ he shouted. ‘I’ll race you back!’

Ben put his hands in his pockets and slowly followed Joe over to his horse. ‘You go ahead son,’ he said. ‘I’ll follow you in a while.’ He waved Joe off and watched as he disappeared into the trees, then turned and faced the lake again. He sighed as he stared out across the water, his hands still in his pockets as the sun beat down upon him. After a moment he turned and walked away alone.

The End