Summary: After Ben and Adam arrive back at the Ponderosa to find Joe beaten, starved and almost dead, tied in his room, the Cartwrights search for the answer to the question, “Why?”.

Rating: PG-13 for violence  (21, 030 words)

*Author’s Note: I would like to thank the wonderful beta readers here at BW for their time and invaluable advice in helping make this story what it is.*

That Which Makes a Better Man

“Looks like the town is still standing.”

Ben Cartwright glanced at his eldest son, and noticed the slight smile at the corner of his mouth. Even though he knew the meaning behind what had been said, he couldn’t help but ask, “How’s that, Adam?” The grin that appeared on Adam’s face confirmed it.

“Joe must have been so busy on the ranch he didn’t have time to come into town.”

Ben laughed in spite of himself as they started to ride through Virginia City. This was actually the first time in almost a year that he and Adam had been gone longer than a few days, and even longer since they left Joe in charge. They had been hesitant to leave ever since they came home once to find wanted posters displaying a picture of Hoss and Little Joe, who were believed to have robbed the bank. Ben hoped the youngest Cartwright had learned a lesson from the last time he was in charge.

During the last two and a half weeks, Adam and Ben had been away from the ranch on business, drawing up two new timber contracts and finalizing a land purchase along the northern border of the Ponderosa. It was rough country, but Adam had a plan to divert part of the river that ran through it to create a reservoir, in case there was ever a drought as serious as the one they had experienced the previous year. Over this past spring the number of cattle had finally been increasing, and they didn’t want to lose the young animals. Ben didn’t quite understand how it would work, but he had faith in Adam’s plans.

Ben’s thoughts turned to Hoss, who should have been left in charge during their time away but at the last minute he had been asked to help out at a neighbor’s farm. Jeb Carter, an old friend, had broken his leg, and was unable to move from his bed. Having a wife and three young children to care for, as well as the spring planting to do, Hoss went to help them out. Ben wished he could have sent Joe instead, but the plowing and planting were very labor intensive, and Hoss was more suited for it.

Ben left the ranch with a great deal of reluctance, and a bit of nervousness. He had given Joe a long list of instructions entailing what he could and couldn’t do during the rest of the family’s absence; still, he was worried that his son had forgotten everything, and Ben would arrive home to a charred mess, or a yard full of gypsies.

Adam noticed his father shudder, and he chuckled to himself. He wished he could have told his father not to worry many times, but frankly if anything could go wrong it usually did when Joe was in charge. They were just hoping that he had risen to the occasion, and behaved responsibly the entire time they were gone.

“Look,” said Ben, breaking Adam out of his musings. “There’s Hop Sing. Hop Sing!” he called.

“Mr. Cartwright!” exclaimed Hop Sing, turning to greet them. “Mr. Adam! Not expect back for five days. All go well?”

“Everything went great, Hop Sing,” replied Adam. “How are things here? How is your cousin?”

Hop Sing had left the ranch at the same time Ben and Adam did. One of his cousins had been ailing for some time, and with only Joe at the ranch and not needing much, it had been a perfect opportunity for Hop Sing to spend time away.

Hop Sing smiled. “Much better.”

“I’m glad to hear that,” replied Ben.

“Mr. Hoss in town. Just saw. He went to store.”

“Good,” said Adam. “We’ll go see him.”

“Hop Sing, I don’t want to cut your visit short, so just come back to the ranch when you had planned to,” said Ben.

“No, no! Be there tomorrow. Need clean, and cook. Joe not keep things way Hop Sing like.”

Ben and Adam laughed, and Ben said, “That’s fine then. We’ll see you back at the house tomorrow.” The two men turned and went back up the street towards the general store.

They came to a stop next to it, just as Hoss and the two Carter boys, who were seven and four, came out. “Hey, Pa! Adam! I didn’t expect to see you two here for another week,” Hoss said, a huge smile on his face, shaking first his father’s, and then brother’s hands.

“Hoss, glad to see you,” greeted Ben, clapping him on the shoulder. “We decided to come home early. How are things with the Carters?”

“Just fine, Pa. We’re pickin’ up some supplies right now. The doc said Jeb should be able to get out of that bed in a few days.”

“Oh, good! Send him our best when you go back today,” Ben said.

“I’ll do that, Pa.”

“How’s that younger brother of ours?” Adam asked Hoss.

Hoss shrugged. “I expect he’s keeping himself pretty busy running things on the ranch. I haven’t seen him since before you left. Oh, I saw Hop Sing earlier today, and he said his cousin’s doing better.”

“Yes, we just saw him. He said he’ll be back at the ranch tomorrow.”

Hoss grinned. “That means everything’ll be cleaned up and there’ll be good food when I get home.”

Ben frowned. “Do you have some reason to think things will be a mess?”

“Nope. Just Joe,” Hoss said with a shrug.

Adam snorted, and Ben cast a glare at him, but didn’t say anything. There wasn’t much he could say; chances were, the place would be a mess. Especially since they were arriving home unexpected.

“Well I got to go get these supplies over to the Carters. I’ll see you in a few days.” Hoss picked up the youngest boy, and swung him onto his shoulders.

“See you, Hoss, take care,” Ben and Adam called after him as he went down the street towards the wagon. They started out of town, each lost in his own thoughts. As they neared Ponderosa land, Adam turned to Ben. “Pa?”

“Hmm?”

“Why don’t we ride by the west fence? Joe was supposed the see that it was repaired. I’m curious to see how much he got done.”

After a couple moments, Ben nodded, and then he and Adam detoured slightly through the trees. Pretty soon, they came out of the woods and were able to survey the wide-open field. Tiny dots that were cattle could be seen in the distance, and there was a breeze blowing through the grasses and changing the shade of the spring green as it went. It was a breathtaking sight.

Adam and Ben paused to enjoy it for a moment, and then spotted two men a little ways away working on the fence.

“Well look at that,” Adam said, satisfaction in his voice. “I must say I’m pleased with that younger brother of mine already.”

Ben grinned and urged his horse on. “If the rest of things are running this smoothly, I think your brother’s going to deserve some well-earned time off.”

They came to a stop near the fence. “Mr. Cartwright!” The men put down their tools and went towards them. “How’s Hoss doin’? Heard he was hurt,” one of them said.

Ben and Adam exchanged a glance. “Hoss? No…I just saw him in town. He didn’t say anything,” replied Ben.

The man looked puzzled. “Really? Well, Little Joe left about a week and a half ago for the Carter’s place. He got a message that Hoss was injured, and when we didn’t hear nothin’ we figured he was, and that Joe was staying there to help them out.”

“Hoss hasn’t seen Joe in three weeks,” said Ben, not really talking to the man. He turned and starting riding in the direction of the ranch house. Adam started after him in an instant, leaving the two men staring after them, rather frightened at their reaction and wondering what this all meant.

Adam’s heart was pounding as he followed his father. Why had someone lured Joe out of the house? What could they have wanted? And why had no one heard from Joe? Adam pushed the last thought out of his head and raced into the yard, pulling his tired horse to a stop next to Ben’s and then dismounting.

They pulled out their guns before cautiously making their way to the front of the house. There was no telling what they might find.

Slowly pushing the door open, Ben led the way inside. “Nothing looks touched,” he murmured.

The rooms downstairs seemed undisturbed; the only thing amiss was that one of the dining room chairs was tipped over.

Ben and Adam exchanged a glance, and then Ben began to search below as Adam took the stairs.

Adam walked down the hall, his heart pounding as he carefully opened each door to make sure no one was inside.

Coming to Joe’s door, he took a deep breath and pushed it open. When he saw the still figure on the bed, he choked back a cry and ran towards it.

“Joe? Joe!” he gasped.

His brother was lying on his side, blindfolded, and deathly pale and thin. His hands were bound together, with the rope tied to the headboard. Swallowing hard, Adam put his hand on Joe’s head and leaned over him. As soon as he touched him, the younger man stirred slightly.

“Joe…Joe, you’re alive,” Adam whispered, and bolted for the door, yelling, “Pa! Come quick! It’s Joe!” Moving quickly back to the bed, he untied the blindfold as Joe moaned. “Joe, Joe I’m here. It’s Adam.” He pulled the blindfold away, noticing many cuts and bruises on his brother’s face.

As the light hit Joe’s eyes, he winced and cried out before weakly turning his head back into the pillow. There was a noise behind Adam, and he turned as Ben quickly crossed the room and bent over his youngest son in fear. “Joe. Is he…?”

“He’s alive,” Adam said. “I’ll get some water.”

When he got back, Ben had untied Joe’s wrists. As Adam reached to help lift Joe, Ben said, “Be careful; his shoulder is injured.”

Adam looked at Joe’s right arm, and could tell that it was. Together, they lifted him carefully and Adam held the water to his mouth. Joe groaned as soon as they moved him, but drank the water until Adam pulled it away. “Not too much,” Adam said, and they lowered him back to the bed.

“Help…help…” Joe opened his eyes slowly, wincing in pain against the sudden light after such a long period of darkness.

“Hush, son. We’re here,” whispered Ben. “Don’t try to talk.” He worriedly scanned his son’s body, trying to decide as to the best course of action. Judging by his son’s emaciated frame and the soiled bedding, Ben figured he had been a prisoner for days. There was no telling what kind of injuries there were. Glancing up at Adam, Ben started to unbutton Joe’s shirt. “Get the guest room ready. We need to move him out of here.”

Adam nodded, and left quickly.

“Water…” groaned Joe as Ben finished undoing the buttons on his shirt and pants.

Ben gently lifted his son, and put the glass to his lips. Joe sipped carefully, and then his head slumped against his father’s vest. Ben quickly looked down, afraid that he had passed out. When he saw Joe blink, he was relieved somewhat, and gently wrapped his arms around him. “Oh my son…” he whispered.

There was a bit of a clatter as Adam came back into the room, as he had a basin, a pitcher of water, and an armful of towels and sheets. He set the items down on the chair next to his younger brother’s bed, and  then without a word, he pulled out his knife and cut away Joe’s sleeves. While Ben gently held him, Adam pulled the ripped and stained shirt away, revealing cuts, bruises, and scratches, too many to count. Next the filthy pants came off, and as Adam pulled them away, Joe gasped and his body jerked in pain. Adam slowly looked up at Ben. “He’s been burnt.”

Ben walked to the end of the bed, and as he took in the injury his face darkened. His son’s feet were badly burned, from the soles up past his ankles. The skin was red and peeling, and it looked quite painful. “Who did this?” he whispered.

“Look at these stab wounds…” Adam ran his hand gently over one of the wounds on his brother’s leg. It was red, and warm to the touch. Adam frowned, and then moved around the bed and soaked one of the cloths in the basin, and then began to gently wipe his brother’s body, washing dirt and dried blood away from the wounds. “He must have been outside,” Adam murmured as Ben grabbed another cloth.

As they cleaned him, they noticed his right shoulder was out of the joint, and appeared to be broken as well. There was a lot of bruising on his left side, and Adam suspected a rib might be broken. Five knife wounds on his left leg, and the chance that two were infected, along with many cuts, scrapes, and bruises all over his arms, legs, and chest. Some of them looked as though they were made by his being dragged along the ground, judging from the amount of dirt in and surrounding the patches of raw skin. What was most noticeable was how emaciated he was.

As soon as they were done washing him, they wrapped him in one of the sheets and then, together, they lifted the all-too light nineteen-year-old and carried him down the hall into the guest room where they put him down on the fresh bed.

Adam stepped back and looked up at Ben. “Pa, I’m going for the doctor…will…will you be all right?”

Ben nodded. “Please hurry,” he replied, and then listened as Adam ran down the stairs and out of the house. Pulling a chair close to the bed so he could monitor his son’s condition, Ben thought about this morning, and how little they would have suspected this. There was no warning, no reason. Ben couldn’t think of anything any one of his family might have done to cause this, but here it was…his youngest son almost dead as proof that someone was angry with them. Hated them, but for what reason, Ben would have to be patient. First they had to save his son’s life.

Glancing at the clock on the other side of the room, Ben shifted in the chair a little. He knew he was in for a long, nerve-racking wait.

*****

The first thing Joe noticed was that it wasn’t so dark anymore. The pitch black that he had been accustomed to was fading into a dark gray. He must be waking up. It would be the same as the last time he woke up, and the time before that…and he would start to hurt again. Soon.

Right now, he wished he could just go back to sleep, before it got worse. He felt his lungs fill with air, and the dullness of familiar pain. He didn’t want to breathe…his body did it for him. It refused to give up. Long after his stubbornness and resolve had been beaten away, his body still clung to life. To the air in his wounded lungs. That was all it had now.

As his lungs emptied, he listened to the ragged sound of his uneven breaths. The pain was getting more intense.

Everything hurt so much when he was awake, it was hard to know where one injury stopped and another began. His mind screamed at him to stop the pain, but he couldn’t…at least not until he passed out from it. Joe felt his lungs fill again, but this time something triggered his memory through the growing pain.

Pa…the air smelled like Pa. Not his cologne, or his freshly laundered suits. It smelled like horses, and leather, and sweat after a long day. Joe wasn’t sure if he really smelled it, or just the memory. His mind played tricks on him. He never quite knew when he was actually awake, or just dreaming that his father came back.

Joe inhaled again, but suddenly he noticed something different. He tried to force himself to understand what it was, but it was so hard to get his mind to focus. Wait…his arms. He could feel pain in his arm. They went numb so often it felt like they weren’t even there sometimes, but right now he could feel them.

Hesitantly, he tried to move his fingers. As he did, he became aware of the warm softness that must be a blanket. The pain was becoming sharper, waking him up, but as it did he realized he wasn’t cold anymore. He must be completely covered. Somehow, the warmth spreading throughout his body made things a little easier to bear. He was glad for it.

Joe turned his thoughts to his father, trying to distract himself from the relentless growing ache of the injuries. He pictured his face, and suddenly Adam appeared too. They seemed to be saying something, but Joe couldn’t hear them.

Vaguely, like it had been a dream, he remembered them in front if him. He hadn’t been able to answer. It must have been a dream.

“Come on, Joe…”

The voice startled Joe, and he struggled against the dark. That couldn’t be a dream, it just couldn’t! He never heard voices in his dreams…it was always deathly quiet. Joe fought against the darkness, trying to become fully awake.

Gasping as pain shot through him, so intense that he almost blacked out again…but his body wouldn’t let him. It faded finally, as Joe struggled to open his eyes. It was getting brighter. It couldn’t be a dream. It was never light in his dreams.

“Pa…” he whispered, his voice almost nothing after not speaking for so long. “Pa…?” he gasped. He wished desperately that it was his father…that he had finally come as Joe so often longed. Please, let him be there… he begged silently, afraid to allow himself to believe that it wasn’t a dream, knowing he would be devastated if it was.

“Son…”

A loving touch smoothed his hair back, and moved over his face, and Joe forced his eyes open at last.

The blurry face in front of him slowly came into focus. He saw the graying hair, the weatherworn strong features, and the intense worry in his eyes. Longing so much to be in his father’s arms, Joe was only able to whisper, “Pa…you’re here…”

He saw Ben reached down, and then his father gently lifted him. Pain cascaded through his body, but he forced himself to pretend it didn’t hurt, as the comfort of having his father’s arms around him meant more.

Something touched his mouth, but he didn’t want to look away from Pa’s face to see what it was. “Drink,” his father said. Water…

Joe opened his mouth, and took a few sips. The sting in his throat grew more intense, but his thirst hurt greater so he drank until his father pulled it away. To his dismay, he felt himself being lowered back to the bed, but it lessened when Ben didn’t move away, and instead leaned close over him, gently caressing his face.

“Don’t worry, the doctor will be here soon,” his father whispered.

Joe wasn’t worried, but he could tell Pa was. His forehead was wrinkled, as it was every time his father was concerned.

Joe wished more than anything he could make him feel better, that he could say, “Pa, it’s okay. You’re here now. The pain will be gone soon, and I’ll be all right.”, but he couldn’t force himself to say the words. Not even he believed all of them. The pain wasn’t gone, and he couldn’t imagine it not being there.

Pa looked towards the door, and Joe wondered if someone else was coming in; but when his father shook his head and turned back to Joe with a slightly more wrinkled brow, Joe knew his father was alone with him. “Pa,” he whispered.

“It’s all right Joe, not much longer, they’ll be here soon…”

Joe forced himself to listen and believe the words his father was saying. He knew his father wouldn’t leave him, but what if the pain overpowered him, and he couldn’t hold on anymore? What if all the times he had wished and prayed that it would end came true? Now he realized he did know more than pain. “Scared…”

Suddenly, there was noise outside the room, in the hall, and Joe looked towards the door as Adam burst in, followed closely by Doctor Martin.

“How is he?” Adam asked.

Joe could tell he was just as worried as Pa as he bent over him. Joe had to struggle for a moment to shift his focus.

“Adam…” he whispered. The look in his brother’s eyes was the same one reflected in his father’s, and it frightened him.  He didn’t want to die anymore.

Coldness descended on him, and he glanced down to see the doctor pulling the blankets away from his naked body. Joe closed his eyes as the doctor’s hands moved briefly over his body, gently touching the spots where he had been hurt the worst.

“Let’s get his shoulder back into place first. Adam, help me.” Joe felt movement as Adam came near. Joe sensed his brother’s hands on his body, and felt the doctor firmly grasp his arm and start to move it. Immediately, pain ripped through his body, and he felt the dark closing in again. He couldn’t help but cry out in anguish as everything was shut out except the new feeling tearing through his arm and shoulder, so intense that all he could do was yell, and hope for either the darkness to end his misery or his brother’s presence to bring him strength.

He felt pressure as Adam’s arms tightened around him even as the pain was threatening to take him. His brother was saying something, and Joe struggled to listen, to focus on his words instead. “Hold on, just hold on…Joe, please stay with me…it will be all right, just hold on…”

He tried to answer, but he felt like all the strength he had left had been ripped out of him with his yell. Finally the pain seemed to diminish, and Joe sank back, feeling as though he was fading in and out with each breath.

“Some water, Joe,” his father said, and he forced himself to sip from the glass that was held to his lips.

“Give him a few minutes to recover. His shoulder had started to heal, so what we just did was probably worse than the original injury.” Joe heard the doctor’s words as though he was speaking from a great distance away, and he wished he could tell him he was right.

Too soon, Dr. Martin continued his examination of Joe’s body. Time and again Joe was able to hold back his cries as the doctor investigated all of his injuries, although he couldn’t help but weakly clench Ben’s hand tighter.

“Let’s put him on his stomach.”

His father released him, and he felt their hands gently, carefully roll him over. He opened his eyes, and saw Hop Sing standing just outside the room, his face expressing the same emotions everyone else was feeling. Shock. Worry. Fear.

“Hop Sing, please go downstairs and make some broth. He will need food, but only liquids for now,” the doctor said.

Hop Sing turned and left, and Joe closed his eyes again as Dr. Martin finished his exam, and once again he was placed on his back. He felt as though the room was tipping slowly from side to side, and the doctor’s words to his father were very hazy.

“He’s very weak…been deprived of food and water…right arm is broken, will need to be re-broken and set straight… two broken ribs…bruises, cuts, and his wrists…struggling against the rope…could get infected. Burns…heal in two to three weeks…need bandages changed everyday…knife wounds on his leg…infected…large scrapes and scratches…”

Joe tuned out the doctor’s voice as he continued to describe his injuries and the remedies necessary. He felt Pa squeeze his hand, and then release him, and he opened his eyes to see his father and brother walk out of the room. He was scared for a moment, and he tried to call out to them, to ask where they were going.

“It’s all right son, Adam will be back in a minute with some food.” Joe shifted his focus to Dr. Martin, who was standing at the side of his bed. He sank back into the pillow as the doctor continued. “You need to get plenty of food and rest, and not worry. Just work on getting strong again.”

Food…he tried to remember the last time he had eaten. He had fought off the hunger at first, but then, as time went on, he knew rescue was too long in coming. He had wished for death, just wanting it to be over, but now…now he wanted to survive this.

He had dreamt of his mother a few times, and each time he had asked her if he was going with her now. “No, mon petit,” she had said. “Not yet, little one. Be brave.”

The room started to go dark, and he closed his eyes, knowing that soon he would be in blissful darkness, where the pain couldn’t torment him anymore, but to his irritation the doctor called his name. Joe looked up at him.

“Don’t go to sleep yet,” Paul said. “Adam is here with some food for you.”

Joe glanced towards the doorway, and saw his brother and father come back into the room. Adam had a tray with a bowl on it, which he set down on a nearby table. The bed moved as his brother sat down, and then Adam gently lifted Joe’s head and held a spoonful of liquid to his mouth. It didn’t seem to taste much different than the water, other than being warm, but he still ate it willingly.

“Make sure he eats slowly,” Paul said, and then turned to Ben. “Let’s go downstairs. Joe should be fine with Adam.”

Joe looked up at his father as he bent close and brushed his hand across his cheek, and then he and the doctor left.

*****

Paul watched as his old friend paced restlessly for a few moments, finally stopping at the fireplace. Ben stood staring at the blackened, cold logs for a few minutes before asking the question he had to ask. “Will he make it, Paul?”

Dr. Martin took a deep breath before carefully answering, “I don’t know. He’s…he’s a strong young man. It’s just…the injuries are so great. Not just the broken bones, weight loss, and possible internal injuries. He’s exhausted, mentally and physically. We’ll just have to wait and see is he can muster enough strength to pull himself out of this.”

“He’d given up,” Ben said quietly. “I could see it in his eyes.” He turned back towards Paul, shaking himself out of his pensiveness for the moment. “How long was he there?”

Martin shrugged and sank slowly onto the settee. “A week? No more than two weeks without food. The thing is…he couldn’t have been more than two or three days without water. He would have died from thirst before his body had begun to show signs of starvation like it does now.”

Ben pounded his hand against the stone next to the fireplace. “Why?” He looked back at Paul. “Someone was here until about three days ago, giving him water, but depriving him of food, beating him, hurting him…for what? Nothing was even taken…look!” Ben pointed angrily at the gun rack on the wall. “Nothing! Nothing is missing, nothing was broken into…there was no reason for any of this!”

“Doc!” Adam urgently called from upstairs.

Paul Martin stood up and rushed up the stairs, followed closely by Ben. They ran into the guest room, and then hurried to Adam’s side and assisted him in supporting Joe. Together, the three men gently held him over the side of the bed until he had finished throwing up the little bit of broth he had just eaten. Martin frowned as he saw traces of blood in the pan Adam was holding. They gently laid Joe back down, and Ben went to get a damp cloth to wipe Joe’s face.

If at all possible, Joe felt even worse now. His stomach, along with his throat, hurt, and he had a horrible taste in his mouth. “Pa…” Joe whispered, and tears started to slip down his face.

“Joe, hush now, son. It will be all right.” Ben gently moved his hand under Joe’s head.

More tears came, and Joe’s body shook as the silent word formed on his lips…hungry.

Ben swallowed, and held Joe tighter. “We’ll try again soon,” he said, looking up to Martin for an approving nod.

“Wait a little while, Joe. We’ll see if you can hold some food down in a half hour.”

Joe nodded, and squeezed his eyes shut as Adam carefully pulled the covers over him again. All he wanted was to stop hurting so much. The room started to fade away, as the events of the last few hours started to finally wear too much on him. It started getting dark, and as the last bit of light faded, Joe saw Marie. Now? he asked her as everything went black.

Ben sat down on the edge of the bed, and ran his hand over his son’s hair once again. He felt the bed move, and he looked up at Adam who was now perched on the other side. Their eyes met, then they both looked back at Joe. Please, thought Ben. Not yet…

*****

Adam knew he was dreaming. He was between waking and sleeping, that time when it’s possible to realize it is a dream, but be powerless to wake up. In his dream he was watching Joe, who was lying on the ground. He wanted to go to him, but he couldn’t move. He couldn’t call out; all that came from his lips were muted whimpers. It was dark. He just wanted to go to him. Suddenly, from the darkness behind Joe, a large, dark shadow emerged. It had no face. Adam wanted to call to his brother, for him to get up, but he couldn’t. He could only watch as the figure came closer, and lifted something over its head. Adam struggled to move, to cry out, and as the shadow brought the object down onto his brother, Adam gasped and woke up. He quickly leaned over his brother, who was still lying in the bed in the same place as the last time Adam saw him.

Adam could tell he was breathing just by listening; Dr. Martin had determined the swelling around the broken rib was causing his ragged breaths, and it probably wasn’t a damaged lung. Once the swelling went down they’d know for sure though.

Adam rubbed his hand over his face. If he was to analyze his dream, he would surmise that the dark figure was the person who had done this, and his own inability to move was a result of the helplessness he felt. All they could do was hope that he was strong enough to heal. They had been rousing Joe to eat every hour or so, and he was finally able to keep the broth down. Last time they woke him he said he felt hungry, which the doc said was a very good sign.

There were footsteps outside the door, and then it was slowly opened as Hoss came into the room. He paused for a brief moment, looking at his brothers, and then went to the bed. He smoothed his hand over Joe’s bruised face, and looked at his bandaged arm and shoulder. Finally he looked up at Adam. “Is he gonna be all right?”

Adam shook his head. “We don’t know,” he was forced to answer quietly. “Right now…we just have to get him stronger. He’s got broken bones, and infected cuts, and he’s so weak…”

Hoss pulled one of the other chairs in the room over to the bed, and sat down across from Adam. “Why would someone do this?”

Adam stood up and shook his head. “Joe hasn’t been able to say anything, but he’s afraid. Every time he wakes up, it’s like he’s waking up from the same nightmare, over and over. I wish we knew. I feel so…” Adam angrily trailed off and slammed his hand onto a table.

They had such a long journey ahead of them, and why, they had no clue. This took malicious forethought…not just someone happening by. Nothing was taken. No reason was left. Why do this…it made no sense. None of it made sense.

Someone hated…wanted revenge so badly, that they sought to wreak it in the most horrible way possible. But why?

“When we catch them they’re gonna pay dearly,” Hoss said.

“I wish he could tell us who did this. I hate waiting.”

“Be patient, Adam. He’ll tell us when he’s able.”

Adam sighed and sank back into the chair. Hoss was right; he needed to be patient, but at the same time, he was anxious to find the persons responsible. He had looked around outside, but there were no tracks other than on the road leading to and from the Ponderosa. Whoever it was stuck to the paths. The only other disturbance was a trail of broken branches leading a little ways into the woods, but it didn’t go anywhere. Whoever did it just went in, and then back out the way they came. Adam had a horrible suspicion that that was the place Joe had received the scratches and scrapes the doctor mentioned.

After several minutes of silence, Hoss began to speak quietly. “Remember that time, when Joe was still in school, and that new kid was picking on him? He came home for three days straight, crying and beaten, but he didn’t tell any of us what happened.”

“I remember,” Adam said.

The kid was older and bigger than Joe, who was eight at the time, and he only went to school for about a week. His mother was the gossiping kind, who relished in learning all the dirt from the local people, and had latched onto the story of the richest man in the area whose wife had died a few years prior. The man’s wife had had a mysterious past, and the local busybodies entertained themselves by creating scandalous scenarios of which she must have been involved with.

Little Joe bore the brunt of their overactive and indelicate imaginations in the form of cruel taunts and insults about his mother from the new kid.

“I was madder than heck when he finally told us. That boy had no right to pick on Little Joe like he did, but we didn’t do anything. We gave Joe a few pointers, and then let him fight his own battle, and he was stronger for it. Well I ain’t gonna do that this time. There’s no way they are gonna get away with hurtin’ him like this.”

“I think we’re all agreed on that, Hoss.”

Just then Joe moaned, and turned his head slightly. His eyes fluttered open, and Adam and Hoss leaned over him. It took him a couple of seconds to focus on them.

“Adam…” Joe whispered. “Hoss…” He smiled a tiny bit and reached out towards Hoss. His brother caught and held his hand, and then smiled down at him.

“How’re you feelin’?” Hoss asked.

“Better. Hungry,” Joe whispered.

“Good,” said Adam. “You were able to eat nearly half the broth before. Think you can eat all of it this time?”

Joe nodded slightly, and the smile grew a little stronger.

“I’ll be right back,” Adam said, and left to get the food. When he came back, Hoss helped prop Joe up, and then Adam fed him the broth. Adam was pleased he was able to eat almost all of it before he started to fall asleep again. They set him back onto the pillows. Adam put the bowl down, and then couldn’t stifle a yawn.

“Adam, how long you been up?” Hoss asked.

Adam shrugged and shook his head. “I don’t really know. It’s been awhile. Pa is going to get up in three hours to relieve me,” he said, looking up at the clock.

“Well, I’m relieving you now. Go on and get some sleep.”

Adam smiled gratefully and started for the door. “Oh,” he said, turning back. “Make sure his breathing doesn’t get worse, and that he isn’t developing a fever. Put some of the stuff from that bottle onto the knife wounds on his leg in about an hour.”

Hoss held up the bottle. “This one?”

“Yes, that’s the one. Doc Martin will be up in a little while to change the dressings on the burns. Thanks, Hoss.”

“See you in a little while,” Hoss replied, and then turned back to his brother. Knife wounds, broken bones, and beatings.

He couldn’t wait until he knew who had done this to his brother…and his family.

Adam stumbled into his room and collapsed onto his bed, where he was asleep almost instantly, still fully clothed.  Thankfully, his sleep was a dreamless one.

*****

Ben put his book down as he realized that he had just read the same paragraph three times and still had no idea what the words meant. Quietly standing up so as not to wake his son, he walked to the window and pulled the curtain aside. The last four days had been difficult; days of worry, sleepless nights, and questions. Ben glanced back at the bed. They had been so close. If they hadn’t arrived home when they did, they would have lost him. Ben shuddered and forced away the images. He went back to the chair and sat down, closing his eyes. It had been close…but they had been very lucky. At least Joe had been showing signs of improvement. The doctor was still closely monitoring his condition, as his breathing was still very rough, and he was concerned about the burns and larger cuts; however, Joe was able to eat more and more each day, and was finally staying conscious for more than a couple hours at a time. Yesterday, he had been able to talk more, even though he didn’t say anything about his ordeal.

Adam had questioned all the hired hands, but hadn’t come up with anything they didn’t already know. A man had arrived with a message that Hoss was hurt. Joe had given their foreman responsibility of the ranch and the jobs that needed to be completed, but after Joe went back to the house to leave, they didn’t see him or anyone else around the ranch. One of the hands had been near the house taking care of the animals daily, but he never went inside, and never saw anything suspicious.

“Pa…”

The faint whisper caused Ben to open his eyes to see Joe looking up at him. Ben smiled. “How do you feel, son? Any better?”

Joe nodded. “A little stronger, I think,” he said, his voice quiet, and a little raspy. “Still hurt, but not as much.” He tried to smile. Ben watched sadly as he failed.

 

“Joe…” Ben started softly.

“It’ll be all right, Pa.”

Ben watched him for a few moments, and then got up. “I’ll get you some food,” he said, brushing the tips of his fingers over Joe’s arm, and then left.

Joe watched him go, and then moved a little to try and get comfortable. There was really no other way for him to lie, though. His left side hurt, and his right arm was broken. The doctor had re-broken it yesterday, because it hadn’t been set properly, and then tightly strapped it and his shoulder so he couldn’t move them. Joe looked down at what he could see of his hands and arms. They looked so…thin. Joe wondered what the rest of his body looked like, and started to push away the blanket, but then stopped. He…actually didn’t want to see. He didn’t know what his body looked like. He didn’t want to know. He knew what he felt like, and that was enough.

Ben walked back in the room, followed by Hoss. “Adam will be right up with a tray,” Ben said.

“How’re you feelin’ today, younger brother?” said Hoss.

“Better,” Joe said. “Could you help me sit up, Pa?”

“Certainly,” Ben said, and then he carefully lifted Joe as Hoss adjusted the pillows, and together they propped him up.

“Is that better?” Ben asked.

Joe grimaced slightly as he moved to ease the pain in his side. “Now it’s better. Thanks,” he replied. He looked at his father, and saw the love…and sadness in his eyes. Joe blinked back tears and quickly looked away. He wished that Pa didn’t have had to see what he did. He wished that this had never happened. He didn’t even know why it did. Joe glanced at his hands again, and clenched them into fists.

“Here you are,” said Adam as he came in with a tray. “A glass of milk, and some broth. Still no solids allowed, but the doctor said we can see how you do with the milk. And as soon as you’re done, he needs to examine you and change those bandages.”

Joe nodded as Hoss helped him sip the milk. He smiled. “That tastes real good,” he sighed, and then hungrily ate the broth with Hoss’s assistance.

While he was eating, Adam turned to Ben. “I just finished talking with Roy in town,” he said. “He didn’t notice anyone suspicious hanging around town or asking questions about us, but he said he’d ask around and see what he could find.”

Joe had stopped eating, and was staring vacantly at the foot of the bed. “Joe?” prodded Hoss, and the younger man looked at him, and then looked at the others, who were watching him. “Are you all right?”

“Yeah…” he said quietly. “Roy…should be able to find something. He asked plenty of questions about us. He knew I was here by myself.”

“Do you know who it was?” Adam asked.

Joe shook his head. “Never saw him before in my life. I don’t even know why…” He trailed off, fingering the edge of the blanket.

“Joe?” said Ben, and when Joe didn’t move or say anything, Adam leaned forward.

“Joe…it’s all right,” Adam said, and put his hand on his arm. “Please tell us.”

Joe looked up at him, and then nodded, “It was…just the one guy. He came in with a message from the Carters, or at least I thought it was. It said Hoss was hurt so I made arrangements with the foreman to watch the ranch while I was gone. I came back in the house to get some things, and that’s when he pulled a gun on me. He tied me up, and…” Joe trailed off.

“What?” asked Adam gently.

“He said that he was going to kill me.” Joe whispered. “He beat me, quite often, while I was tied so I couldn’t defend myself. He had planned on tying me up and leaving me to starve, but…I got away. That’s where most of these injuries came from. I had only made it a few yards when he spotted me. I ran, but…he caught up to me on his horse, and roped me and dragged me back. My arm got caught funny, which is how it got hurt. And I hit plenty of trees on the way back. After that, he said I wouldn’t be able to run away again.”

“He burned you?” Adam asked.

Joe nodded. “That’s right. That’s where the knife wounds came from as well.” He could see the anger on their faces, and in their clenched fists, and he knew all of them would chase after this man the first moment they could.

“Did he say anything else?”

Joe pondered the question carefully. “Just that he knew the best way to get at Ben Cartwright was through one of his sons.”

“How about his name?”

Joe looked away. He didn’t want to tell them the name, not yet. He was afraid they would leave if he told them, and go hunt this man. He still needed his father, and his older brothers; but most of all, he needed Adam with him. During the hours of loneliness tied in his room, he had thought often of his childhood, and the times he spent with Adam, both before and after he had been away at school. The ones that stood out most weren’t when they had disagreements or arguments; rather, he remembered the times when he had sought out his brother for his advice, when the problem was too serious to take to his father, or when they had worked together on something, with Adam imparting on him the fundamentals of how to be a man. As many times growing up that Joe had rebelled against his eldest brother’s disciplines and principles, he had also accepted them and they had grown with him.

Throughout his ordeal, Joe had thought about his brother, and his strength and the values he lived by, and relied on the lessons that had been taught by him. Trying to imagine how Adam would have dealt with the situation, and not given up. How he would never had given his tormentor the reaction that he wanted. When Joe failed, he relied on his brother’s strength to give him hope to keep trying.

“Joe? Do you know his name?” Adam asked.

Joe looked up at Adam. “Please, don’t do it, don’t go after him.”

“What are you talking about?” Adam replied, sitting next to him on the bed.

“Adam, I…I need you here. You can’t leave, you can’t leave me now! Don’t go…don’t…go after…him…” Joe’s breath was coming faster, which was irritating the swelling around his lung. He started to cough, and tears welled in his eyes as pain shot through almost his entire body.

“Joe!” called Adam, and reached for him, holding his uninjured arm and cupping his hand around the back of his head.

“Calm down, just breathe…”

“Don’t…leave. Promise…” Joe choked out.

Hoss and Ben had moved forward too, as Joe bent over, coughs ripping through his whole body. “Joe, hush son, just breathe slowly,” said Ben, slowly rubbing his son’s back.

“Come on boy, calm down,” coaxed Hoss, until finally Joe was able to slow his breathing and the coughs subsided.

“Joe…I won’t leave until you’re well. I promise, Joe,” Adam said, his mouth close to Joe’s ear.

Dr. Martin had rushed in at the end of Joe’s coughing fit, and he quickly moved to them. “Here, let’s lay him down so there’s not so much pressure on his side.”

They quickly followed his directions, and then stepped back as he examined Joe’s broken ribs. After a few moments he stepped back. “You’re going to have to take it slow for the next few days,” he said to Joe. “If you push yourself, you may not heal correctly.”

Joe nodded. “Adam?” he whispered.

Adam leaned over him. “Yes, Joe?”

“Seth Morgan,” Joe whispered, and then his eyes closed and he slumped back into the pillows.

Adam and Hoss exchanged glances. “Pa, we’re gonna go talk to the sheriff,” Hoss said.

Ben nodded. “Be back before dark,” he said, as Adam and Hoss started to leave.

“Wait,” said Paul. “I’m almost out of urtica-urens. If you could pick some up for me, I’d appreciate it. It’s the liquid for burns I’ve been using.”

“Sure thing doc,” said Hoss, and then the two brothers left.

*****

Adam and Hoss burst in the front door.

“Pa?” Adam called.

He and Hoss tossed their hats and guns onto the sideboard, and then went into the main room. There was no sign of their father. Adam was just about to follow Hoss up the stairs, when a letter on the table behind the settee caught his attention. He picked it up, and read it with a growing frown.

“Dear Pa,

You may think that I love you, but it’s not so. In fact, it’s not hard to write what I want to say. I hate you. Know that if I’m dead when you get this, that I meant what I said, and don’t feel sorry for it. I only wish I had been able to write more, and see your face one last time as I told you how I feel.

Joe.”

As Adam read the note, he felt his anger building. It was quite obviously written in his brother’s hand. What had his captor done to him, to make him write something like that?

“What is it?”

Adam looked up at Hoss, who was standing in the middle of the stairs, waiting for him. Just then Ben walked around the corner at the top of the stairs.

Adam looked up at him, and asked, “How’s Joe?”

“His breathing has gotten worse, because the swelling went up. He asked for you. I told him you went into town for more supplies for Doc Martin. Did you find anything?”

“We sure did, Pa. I’ll let Adam explain while I go stay with Joe,” Hoss said, and then went upstairs.

Adam sighed as Ben came down into the room. “Well, this Seth Morgan was hanging around in town just after we left.

The man at the hotel recognized his name and gave a description; and from that we were able to find out about him. He asked lots of questions about us, and the Ponderosa, and some of the people became a little leery because he seemed so interested. We did find out a couple of people mentioned to him that Joe was going to be here by himself.”

“Why would they tell him that?” Ben wondered out loud.

“Well…it seems like they were joking about it. About how he’d handle things and whether the bank would be robbed again…”

“I see,” Ben said quietly. “Do you know anything else about him?”

“He mentioned to someone that he was from Texas, and told someone else it was Arizona,” Adam said. “He also said he was going either to San Francisco or north. Not very much to go on, but Roy is making some inquiries. I really wish we could go after him now, Pa, and see what we could find.”

“Hmm,” was Ben’s answer. “You did make a promise to him, Adam. And I think you’d better stick to it.”

Adam sighed and nodded. “Where did this come from, Pa?” he asked, indicating the note.

“It was in the top drawer of my desk,” Ben replied. “I found it this morning.”

“It’s not something Joe would have written easily,” Adam said quietly, knowing that his statement both helped and hurt his father. He studied the note. There was something wrong with the phrasing. Some of it sounded like Joe, and yet, it was wrong, somehow…

“The young patient is asleep again,” announced Dr. Martin as he descended the staircase into the main room. “I redressed the burns, they’re looking better. I’m still worried about the infected wound on his leg, and those broken bones especially now that the swelling has gone up, so we all need to try to limit his movement as much as possible. I know that will be difficult, but all this sleep is good for him.”

Ben nodded. “That’s good. You think the infection will spread?” he asked, worry marking his voice.

Paul sighed. “There’s a good chance, especially because his body doesn’t have enough strength to fight it off right now. We’ll just need to clean it often, and keep a close eye on it.”

Ben nodded.

“I got it!” said Adam, and they looked oddly at him. He held the note up. “No, this…it’s every other line. If you read it straight through, it makes no sense. It’s every other line…listen… ‘Dear Pa, I love you, but it’s hard to write what I want to say,’” Adam’s voice rose as he read the paper, and Ben’s face was white. “‘Know that if I’m dead I meant what I said, and I only wish I had been able see your face one last time. Joe.’”

Ben reached over and took the note, reading the hidden message for himself. He was speechless; that his son had anticipated dying, and managed to leave this message, despite its intentions by his would-be murderer.

He stood up and crossed the room to the stairs, and then went up and entered the guest room where his son was sleeping fitfully with Hoss by his side. Joe moaned, and Ben put his hand on his son’s arm. “Hush…I’m here son, no one’s going to hurt you…” The sound of his voice seemed to calm his son, and Joe settled back into the pillow.

“Pa,” he murmured in his sleep. “Pa…not yet…”

Ben watched as Joe slipped into restful sleep. “Oh, son,” he whispered. “What you went through…”

*****

The next morning, Adam was quietly reading next to Joe’s bed when his brother woke up.

“Adam.”

Adam closed his book and smiled at Joe. “Good morning. How are you feeling?”

“Better.” He had spent the whole night waking up with coughing fits, but towards the morning they had subsided as the swelling finally went down a bit after many applications of cool cloths. His lungs still felt constricted, but at least he wasn’t coughing anymore.

“Are you hungry?”

Joe nodded, and Adam stood up. “Wait a minute, I’ll go get…” then he broke off and laughed. Joe looked towards the door, and smiled too.

Hop Sing was just coming in with a tray of food.

“You beat me, Hop Sing. I was just coming down.” Adam took the tray from him, sniffing the contents. “That smells good, what is all this?”

“Milk, raw egg, cornmeal mush.”

Joe smiled. “Sounds a lot better than broth,” he said. “Except the raw egg.”

“Raw egg good. Make Joe strong again,” he replied, and then turned to leave.

“Thanks, Hop Sing,” called Adam, and set the tray down on the stand next to the bed. “Here, let me help you,” Adam said, and he gently lifted Joe and propped him against the pillows.

“Adam? Can I see that paper?”

Adam looked at the paper Joe pointed out. He picked it up from the stand and glanced at it, before handing it to Joe.

“Pa found it, didn’t he?” Joe asked quietly. He had forgotten about it, or else he would have made Adam find it before their father did. He hadn’t wished to inflict that hurt on him, unless it had been the only way to leave a message.

“Yes. He found it yesterday.” Joe looked up at him, and Adam almost had to catch his breath as he observed the intensity of emotion in Joe’s eyes.

“Did he understand?”

“Yes, Joe, he understood.”

“What it really meant? He read it…every other line, right Adam?”

“Yes, Joe. Every other line.”

“Good,” Joe whispered, and looked back at the note. “I never wanted him to have to read something like that, but it was the only way I could give Pa any sort of message. He said he would give me water if I wrote it. I didn’t write it for the water; I wrote it so I could leave a message for Pa. It was the only way, Adam! I hated writing it, but I thought Pa…or you, would figure it out, and know I didn’t mean those things…”

“We did, Joe. We were just trying to figure out…” Adam sighed, sitting on the edge of the bed. “Why, or how, really.”

Joe nodded. “He…just wanted to hurt Pa, as much as possible, and he figured finding something like that would. He… he hates Pa, but I don’t know why. I’ve never seen him before. I don’t know why, or where he was from. I don’t know anything about him.” Joe hesitated, and then softly continued. “He…he didn’t know who I was either. He knew that Joe Cartwright was on the ranch by himself, that’s all. He didn’t care…” Joe looked away from him at the memory. The man didn’t care what his name was. He’d just wanted to kill him. “He wanted me to die in the worst way possible, is what he said. That’s why I wrote the note. I thought I could leave something behind other than…that.” Joe looked up at Adam, but then he had to avert his gaze again. There were a few moments of silence. He didn’t know how to say the rest. Finally he asked, “Do you want to hear it?”

Joe didn’t look up, but he could tell his brother nodded. He reached over and took hold of Adam’s hand. He needed his strength now. “I…was so angry…and then frightened. It…it was horrible. He beat me, until I either passed out or begged him to stop. Anything he could do, to hurt me, or…make me feel…inferior, but I just wanted it to end. I knew…” Joe trailed off and closed his eyes.

“What…?” Adam whispered.

“I knew that you and Pa wouldn’t be home in enough time,” he said quietly. He felt Adam’s hand tighten, and he couldn’t bring himself to look up. “At first I was so afraid…that I was going to die. I…didn’t want to. I didn’t want you to come back to that. But…after awhile…it…” Joe leaned back, not sure if he wanted to hear himself say it out loud.

“Please, Joe, keep going,” Ben said quietly.

Joe looked up, startled, as he hadn’t notice Ben and Hoss come in. He slowly shook his head. “Pa…I can’t…”

Adam squeezed his hand. “Joe…” he said quietly. “We want to hear the rest. Please tell us.”

Joe looked up at him, and then finally nodded. “I…just wanted it to be over. He was going to kill me, I  knew he was. I just…I…just…wanted him to do it. I hurt…hurt so much…I just wanted it to end…an end to the pain, and…I mean I didn’t want to die, but…I wanted it to be over…” Joe felt tears slip down his face, and his father moved to his side, and then he felt strong arms wrapping around him, holding him close. Joe buried his face in Ben’s shirt, and let all the pain, terror, and fear out. “Pa…” he sobbed. Joe felt the pressure around his lungs increase, and he tried to control his breathing. He didn’t want another coughing fit.

Ben tightly held his son, but carefully, to not aggravate the injuries. “Joe…” he whispered. He didn’t know what to say.

What words could ease the nightmare his son had endured?

*****

Adam stepped out of the guest room with the empty tray. Joe had been so upset that it had taken a lot of coaxing before he ate everything. Adam walked down the hall, and paused outside Joe’s room. After a moment, he pushed the door open and went in.

He and Ben had taken care to clean the room thoroughly, so that no trace of Joe’s ordeal had remained. They destroyed all the bedding, and put a new mattress and linens on the bed. In fact, everything was ready for Joe to move back in.

Adam set the tray down on the bureau, and went over to the bed.

Joe wasn’t likely to be moved here anytime soon. Adam sat down and looked around the room. All of Joe’s things were hanging on the walls or set on shelves or tables, they way he liked them. There was a little picture of his mother on the stand next to the bed.

Adam looked at the headboard. He had noticed it earlier, but he wasn’t sure if his father had. There were raw spots in the wood that had been worn by the ropes as Joe had struggled against them. He reached out and fingered them.

“Adam?”

Adam looked up at Hoss, and then stood up. “Sorry, just thinking,” he said, and picked up the tray from the bureau.

“Roy Coffee just came by. He said the man lives in Texas, but was recently in a town near San Francisco, where he was in jail for a night.”

“Are you going?”

Hoss nodded. “Catch up with me when you can,” he replied.

Adam sighed. “I will. It might take a couple weeks. You telling Joe?” Hoss nodded. “What about Pa? Did he agree?”

Hoss chuckled mirthlessly. “I think he wants to come.”

“What?” Adam said, a little louder than he meant to.

“What Joe said back there…it really got to him, Adam. He blames himself for what happened.”

“Come on, Hoss, Pa couldn’t have done anything to prevent this.”

“He figures he must have given this guy a reason to hate him.”

Adam didn’t have an answer. He pushed past Hoss, and then left to put the tray in the kitchen for Hop Sing. When he went downstairs, Ben was standing next to the fireplace talking to Roy Coffee.

“It’s up to you, Ben,” Roy was saying. “I don’t know if you want to leave Joe for that long…”

“As soon as Paul says that Joe is out of any danger…Adam.” Ben turned to look at him.

“Pa…you’re not serious,” Adam protested. “You should stay with Joe. I can go instead.”

“Adam, you don’t know this man. I certainly don’t remember him, but he apparently knows me, and what he did to my son…” Ben broke off and looked back towards the fireplace. “I can’t just sit by and let this go unanswered, Adam. Besides, I’d feel better not sending Hoss alone, and you made a promise to your brother.”

“Yes I did make a promise,” replied Adam. “But I certainly don’t intend to let you-“

“Adam!” Ben snapped, but then he rubbed his hand over his eyes. “I’m sorry. I just…I know I have enemies. I’ve never gone out of my way to hurt anyone, and yet…this was my fault! I’m going to bring the man that did this to justice!” he hissed. “And Joe needs you, Adam. More than he needs me right now.” As much as that hurt him to admit, he knew it was the truth and there was no denying it. He had seen it in Joe’s eyes, and when he had begged Adam to stay…only Adam.

He knew there were different reasons for it, and some caused by him. Joe had grown up with Adam more as a father than a brother, so great was the age difference. And while Ben had taken the disciplinarian role, and physically enforced the rules his youngest son was to follow, Adam had been able to lead solely with example, something Joe responded to with undying loyalty in his younger years. As he grew up, he often went to Adam with his toughest problems. Ben had felt a little hurt the first few times it had happened, but soon saw that the relationship they shared was special. In recent years, when Joe had come into his own as a man, Ben could see the lessons and strengths that Adam had given him, that were separate from the ones Ben had passed onto his son. Even when disagreements rose between the brothers, they never broke the bond that had been created.

It was that same bond that made it easier for Joe to confide in Adam now, instead of his father. Ben noticed the few times Joe had talked about his ordeal, it had been at the prompting of Adam, and it seemed as though Joe had merely allowed him and Hoss to listen. As much as Ben wished that Joe could freely confide in him, he knew his son couldn’t.

He saw the guilt on Joe’s face; the look that he wore only because he recognized that same emotion on his father’s face. Ben couldn’t help it. He blamed himself.

“What are you going to tell him?” Adam asked.

Ben looked back at him. “The truth. That Hoss and I are going to look for the man that did this. And that you’re remaining here.”

“I don’t think he’s going to take it well.”

“I know, but what else can we do…”

Adam nodded. They couldn’t wait much longer, or else the trail would be gone. He just hoped that Joe would understand it.

*****

“Well, I think you’re certainly getting stronger,” Dr. Martin was saying as Adam walked into the guest room the next morning. Paul glanced at Adam. “Would you care to help me? I’ll show you how to dress these wounds, since you’ll need to do it after I leave.”

The doctor pulled the blankets down to Joe’s waist. “The cuts on his chest and stomach need to be cleaned daily. These here,” the doctor indicated the smaller wounds, “have begun to heal so they should heal fine. Just watch for any redness, warmth, or oozing on the others because that could mean infection. You’ll need to unwrap, and then rewrap the bandage around his waist when you clean the wounds. Make sure you rewrap it with the same tension. Don’t worry about his ribs, other than to make sure that he doesn’t move for the next three weeks or so. And of course, I’ll be here every day or so to check. His arm however…will probably take a great deal longer to heal, as it was a pretty bad break. The swelling in his shoulder has gone down, and in a few days he can start to move it. Although,” he directed at Joe. “It will be quite stiff and sore, and you’ll need to be careful with that arm.”

Joe nodded, and the doctor went to the end of the bed, and pulled the blankets up to Joe’s thighs. “Here’s the difficult part,” Paul said. “These burns need to be cleaned and redressed every day. They are oozing a lot right now, but that’s a good sign. The important thing is to make sure no infection develops, which could mean changing the dressing, three, four times a day. When you rewrap them…here, they can be changed now. I’ll show you.”

Paul directed Adam to carefully unwrap the bandages. “Put them over here, I’m having Hop Sing boil them so we can reuse them. Now, take fresh strips, and soak them in the urtica-urens solution, then gently wring them. When you rewrap them, make sure they’re not too tight. The hard part is the skin cannot touch, otherwise it won’t heal correctly, so you have to get the cloth between his toes.”

The doctor showed Adam how to wrap the bandage.

Joe uttered a few muffled cries, and then settled back as soon as he was done. “Feeling better now?” the doctor asked.

Joe nodded. “Yeah. It’s just the wrapping that hurts. The pain goes away after a few minutes.”

Paul nodded. “Very good. All right, Adam, go ahead and do the other one.”

Adam tried to be as careful as he could, so that Joe wouldn’t hurt too much, but as the very act of touching him brought pain, it was very difficult. Adam finally finished, and stood up. He looked towards his brother, and said, “I’m sorry, Joe.”

“It’s all right. It doesn’t hurt that much,” Joe whispered.

Adam swallowed, and turned back to Paul, who gave him a few final reminders about the infected cut in Joe’s leg.

“That’s about it,” he said finally. “I think I’ll be able to leave tomorrow, but as I said, I’ll be back everyday to check. It looks like he’s going to be fine, though. As long as he doesn’t push himself too much right now.” Dr. Martin readjusted the blankets.

Joe looked up at him. “Why didn’t you show Pa and Hoss as well?”

Paul Martin paused, and looked over at Adam. Joe turned and looked at his brother.

“Adam? Why?”

Adam watched as Paul repacked his bag, putting all his equipment back in carefully before turning and leaving the room. Finally Adam looked up at Joe. “I think I’ll let Pa explain it.” He started to leave.

“He’s going, isn’t he.”

Adam paused near the door. “Yes Joe,” he answered quietly.

“When?”

“Tomorrow.”

“Was he even going to tell me?”

Adam turned back to his brother. “Of course he is, Joe. Don’t say that.”

“Don’t let him go.”

Adam walked back over to Joe. “There’s not much I can do. We have to get this man. The longer we wait, the farther away he’ll get.”

Joe looked away from him. He didn’t want any of his family to go, although he knew they would, as soon as they could.

This man was dangerous. Joe couldn’t bear to think of any of his family being treated the way he had been.

“Joe, Pa may know this man, and we’re certainly not letting Hoss go off by himself.”

“Pa feels guilty.”

Adam sank into the chair next to the bed. He glanced towards the doorway, and noticed his father standing there. By the expression on his face, he must have heard Joe’s last statement. When his father didn’t make a move to come into the room, Adam looked back at Joe. “He shouldn’t.”

“No, he shouldn’t,” Joe said angrily. “He never meant to hurt anyone…ever! He’s tried so hard to help people…this isn’t his fault! There’s no reason this should have happened, and just because he might know this man is not a good enough reason for him to leave!”

Adam heard the silent “me” at the end of Joe’s statement, and glanced briefly toward his father. “He’s not abandoning you, Joe.”

“Yes he is, he can’t bear to look at me.”

Adam sharply inhaled. “Joe,” he said tersely.

“Don’t you see it? Every time he looks at me, he gets sadder and angrier,” Joe said quietly.

Their father was leaning against the wall outside with his eyes closed.

“I don’t know why this happened, why this man felt forced to do this…to try to hurt Pa. He wasn’t trying to hurt me, he was trying to hurt Pa. Well, he succeeded.”

Ben turned and left. Adam looked back at Joe. “I guess he did.”

*****

Joe opened his eyes to complete darkness, his heart pounding. He reached for his face, but couldn’t find the blindfold. Where was it? Why couldn’t he see? Joe cried out, completely disoriented. Where was everyone? He was alone in the house again. What happened? What happened to them?

“Pa…” he weakly called. He felt out of breath. His heart was racing. “Adam, where are you?” He knew hardly any sound came out. He gasped for air. He didn’t want to be alone. He didn’t want to be alone! Someone, anyone, please help! He silently begged. He reached out. Nothing. Where was he?

“Help,” he moaned, his speech almost paralyzed by terror.

“Joe…” he heard far off. Help me! he tried to scream. I can’t talk…why can’t I talk? Help…please…

“Joe…” the person was closer. The room started to shake.

I’m going to die…I’m going to die…

“Joe, wake up…”

Joe opened his eyes, gasping. Tears started to fall down his face, and he reached for the person sitting next to him. Joe found himself being pulled into a protective embrace, and he desperately grasped the man’s shirt. “Don’t go…don’t go…I don’t want to be alone…”

“I’m not leaving you,” Adam said. By the dim light of the moon, he could see Joe’s hand, his knuckles white, clutching his sleeve. “I’m right here, I’m not going anywhere.”

“You were all gone!” Joe cried. “Everybody left me, and I couldn’t…”

“It’s all right, Joe. It was just a bad dream.” The bedroom door opened, and Adam looked towards the silhouetted figure in the doorway.

“What happened?” Ben asked, as he entered and sat down on the edge of the bed. “Are you all right, son?”

Joe looked up, the initial terror of his nightmare fading. “Yes…” he whispered. “I’m fine. Adam could you get me some water?”

“Certainly.” Adam gently released his brother and reached for the pitcher on the table next to the bed. He handed the glass of water to Joe, who drank about half. Adam set the glass back on the stand.

“I’ll be all right now, if you could just put the lamp on. I…I don’t like the dark,” he said quietly.

Ben frowned, and got up and lit the lamp. “There, is that all right?”

Joe nodded.

“The dark never bothered you before, son…”

“It does now,” he whispered.

Tonight was the first night they all had gone back to their own beds, and the first time the light hadn’t been burning all night long in the room. Joe sighed and used his free arm to adjust the blanket.

“I’m all right. You can go back to bed now.”

Adam stood up and offered a quiet good night, before leaving the room. Ben lingered a moment, contemplating whether it would be a good idea to address the conversation he had heard earlier, waiting there a few moments, thinking about all the things he could say, but finally he just brushed his hand over Joe’s face and said, “Sleep well, son.”

*****

About a week had passed since Hoss and Ben had left. Joe waited anxiously for the telegrams they sent every few days.  Most of them just said, “No sign. Continuing north”. Joe was dreading the day they would reach the end of the telegraph line, and then there would be no word.

Ben and Hoss had arrived in San Francisco after two and a half days. A couple of people in the city where the man had been arrested said he was traveling north, so they had gone that way. Joe knew they wouldn’t quit until they found something.

Joe had been getting stronger as well. He was able to awkwardly push himself up against the pillows now. It was difficult though because he only had the use of one arm, and his feet still hurt. Most of the smaller cuts and scrapes were about healed, and the wounds on his leg were healing nicely. Dr. Martin said he could try some solid foods soon. Joe was looking forward to that.

“Hello!”

Joe looked towards the door, where Dr. Martin and Adam had just entered.

“How is my most impatient patient today?”

Joe had to laugh as Dr. Martin set his bag down. “I’m better, doc,” he said.

“Good. Let’s see those burns.” Dr. Martin pulled the blankets back, and then unwrapped the bandage. “Much better,” he said. “It looks like the skin is peeling. Does it hurt?” he directed at Joe.

Joe shook his head slightly. “Not nearly as much.”

“I’ve still been changing the bandages in the morning and at night,” Adam said.

“Very good. Start to carefully wash the burns, just with cool water once a day, and I’ll leave some simple cerate to be applied daily until the burns are completely healed.  Let’s see the cuts here…” The doctor pulled the blanket up farther.  “Excellent. The infection is gone.” He looked up at Joe. “You’ve been a very good patient.”

Joe grinned as the doctor pulled the blankets back down. Paul moved to Joe’s side, and gently pressed against his ribs.

“Does your side still hurt?” he said.

“Yes, but it’s getting better,” Joe said.

Paul nodded. “Let’s take a look at this shoulder.” The doctor unwrapped the sling. “No swelling, good. Have you tried to move it at all?” When Joe shook his head, he nodded. “Well, I want you to start moving it. Adam, you’ll need to help him. I’ll show you what to do. Let’s move him away from the back of the bed.”

They slid Joe farther down on the bed. Paul sat down next to Joe, and gently held his broken arm at the wrist and elbow.

“All right, this is probably going to be uncomfortable.” He lifted Joe’s arm, and Joe sharply inhaled.

The doctor continued to lift his arm, until Joe cried out. Paul gently set it back down, and then moved it to the side, once again until Joe called out in pain. Dr. Martin moved his arm very gently in a small circle, and then put it back in the sling.

“Do this three times a day, and try to make the movements bigger,” he said. “Unless there is swelling. The joint is stiff, it will need to work that out, but I don’t want you to move it on your own,” he said to Joe. Dr. Martin felt his shoulder.

“It’s a bit warm. If it swells, put some cool cloths on it to help it go down.”

Adam nodded, and then helped Joe prop himself back against the pillows.

Dr. Martin picked up his bag. “I’m going to have Hop Sing make a special meal for you tonight. How does bread, mashed potatoes, and a little bit of chicken sound?”

A slow smile crept over Joe’s face. “Really?”

“Yes. I think you deserve it. Keep on following my orders, and we might have you out of that bed in another week. You probably won’t be able to walk quite yet, but we should be able to move you.”

Joe grinned. “That’s great, doc! Thanks!”

Paul laughed. “Don’t thank me,” he said. “Just keep following the doctor’s orders. I’ll be back in three days or so.” He smiled, and then turned and left.

Joe watched as Adam followed him out, and then happily sighed and sank back into the pillows. Now all he had to do was be patient for a week.

*****

As Adam moved Joe’s wooden peg closer to the finish line, he was happy to see the smile on his brother’s face.

“Four more,” Joe said.

Adam grinned at him. He had learned to play Cribbage at college, but hadn’t played in years. When he had seen the set in San Francisco, he felt nostalgic and purchased it. He was excited at how easily Joe had learned it, and was managing to play just fine with one hand.

“I’m a little rusty but you picked up on it right away. I think you’re going to win,” Adam said, looking at the cards he was holding.

“We’re tied now,” Joe said at the end of the hand. “Whoever wins the next game wins the match.”

Adam nodded, and shuffled the cards. He dealt out six to each of them, but noticed Joe pause instead of picking up the cards.

“What’s the matter?” When he saw the look on his brother’s face, though, he knew what it was. “Need some help?” Joe nodded, and Adam set his cards down on the table, then pulled out the bedpan.

Once Adam had helped Joe back into the bed and comfortably propped against his pillows again, he left to empty the pan.

Joe sighed as he slumped down a little. He couldn’t ever remember being this helpless. He was trying to be patient, as the doctor had told him, but it was very difficult. Even when he was really sick or hurt, he always had something he could do on his own. Whether it be getting dressed, walking around or even just holding a book he wanted to read. Joe glanced at the nightstand next to him, where Adam’s copy of some sort of Enlightenment literature waited for him to read out loud.

Joe couldn’t remember the title…but the story was about a girl and a guy, and they liked each other but they wouldn’t admit it and their families wanted them to court. There were a number of people whose names and roles Joe could never remember and so had to ask Adam every time they entered the storyline again. Joe snorted. Never a book he would have picked out, but he really liked hearing Adam read it to him.

A few times he had fallen asleep during important scenes, and Adam hadn’t noticed so when he started again he’d had to backtrack. When he didn’t fall asleep though, it was very calming to listen to his brother’s deep voice reciting the lines Joe didn’t quite understand, emphasizing the phrases he felt were important and taking on each character through his tone and pronunciation of the words they spoke.

Joe’s musings were interrupted when Adam came back in. “You look thoughtful,” Adam commented as he sat down in the chair next to Joe’s bed again and picked up his cards.

Joe picked up his hand as well, and put down two cards without quite looking at them. “Yeah…” was all he said. After a couple of bad plays, he sighed and set the cards down. “Doc Martin was supposed to be here yesterday to see if I could get up yet.”

Adam nodded. “Yes he was.”

“Don’t you think he would have said that I could?”

Adam shook his head. “I know you’re terribly anxious, Joe, but you’re going to have to wait.”

“I know,” Joe said quietly. He glanced around. “I’m just sick of being in this same room. It’s been three weeks.”

“Four.”

Joe groaned and dropped his head to his chest. He looked up when Adam laughed. “What?” he said grumpily.

Adam shook his head. “You’ll be a lot happier when Paul comes by this afternoon.”

“He’s coming today?” At Adam’s nod, Joe’s mood lifted considerably. He picked up the cards again, and put one down.

He was surprised when Adam sighed and moved Joe’s peg forward. “What did I get?” he asked.

“Run of four,” Adam replied. “I should have told you the doc was coming after this game.”

Joe laughed.

*****

“I don’t understand it, Pa. What makes a man do somethin’ like that,” Hoss said as he lay next to the campfire, watching the flames dance over the wood.

Ben looked at his middle son. He knew he had no answer that would satisfy him. Hoss was pure, and good. His gentle nature allowed him to have patience with many different people, and be a best friend to children; but at the same time, would not allow him to understand deliberately harming another, for any reason.

Ben remembered the first time Hoss came home with an animal…the first of many. It was a kitten. It was missing an ear, and could hardly walk as a result of an injured paw. The humane thing would have been to put it out of its misery, but Hoss wouldn’t allow it. He had taken the creature that afternoon from a neighboring farm that Ben, Adam, and Hoss had visited. The two boys who lived there were around the same age as Hoss, but contained none of his gentle spirit.

With tears streaming down his face, the six year old had confessed to taking the kitten. The two boys had been tormenting the poor animal, and Hoss couldn’t bear to leave it. He had taken great care of the kitten, but it never walked right. It used to wait for him to come out in the morning to do his chores, hobbling after him all day; or more often than not, riding along in a spare pocket or on his shoulder. Ben had been awed by his patience and care, which up until that point had never been so apparent.

“What’re you thinkin’ about, Pa?”

Ben smiled slightly and looked up at Hoss. “Cat,” he said.

Hoss gazed into the fire for a few moments. “Cat was a good cat. Never had another one like her.”

Ben snorted. “No. Not one in the next five litters was like her.”

Hoss smiled. “I couldn’t get rid of those poor little things.”

“I don’t think hiding them all in the supply house was a very good idea.” Ben shook his head. “26 cats…poor Bert.”

“I didn’t know he was going in there that day. And I certainly didn’t know he didn’t like cats. I never did understand him.”

Ben laughed. “Nobody did.”

For a few minutes, they each just watched the fire, lost in their own thoughts. Finally Hoss said, “You think Joe’ll be all right?”

Ben nodded. “Yes. The doctor said he should be fine.”

Hoss shook his head. “No…not the injuries. I mean…well, Cat was never really normal. I notice animals act different, when they’ve had someone hurt them, or be mean to them. They’re always afraid it’ll happen again.”

Ben sighed. “I’ve worried about that too, Hoss. At least with people, they can…talk about it, let other people know how they feel. And, hopefully when we catch this man that will take away some of that fear.”

Hoss paused for a moment. “You’re afraid of that too.”

“Of what?”

“Of him comin’ back, hurtin’ Joe again, if we don’t get him.”

Ben sighed, and then nodded. It was a fear that made itself known in his dreams at night, and crept into his thoughts during the day. That’s why he was determined to get this man…so that they all could feel safe again.

*****

Joe held Adam’s hand tightly. The doctor was on his other side, supporting him under the arm, and taking great care not to put pressure on his still healing bone. Joe took a deep breath, and squeezed Adam’s hand. The doctor had told him that standing on his newly-healed feet might cause him pain, and now, that he was so close to standing again for the first time in over a month, he felt very unsure. What if he couldn’t walk again? Dr. Martin had said he should be able to, but he wasn’t sure.

“Here goes,” whispered Joe, and he slowly put weight on his first his right, then left foot.

He grimaced slightly at the pain, but forced himself to keep going. Holding tightly to Adam’s hand, he pulled himself off the bed. He almost collapsed onto the floor, but the doctor’s and Adam’s hands held him up. There was some pain, but mostly it was because he hadn’t stood in a great while.

He felt his legs start to shake a bit, and the doctor and Adam lowered him back to the bed.

“How do you feel?” asked the doctor.

Joe thought for a moment. “Weak…” he sighed.

“Don’t worry,” said Adam. “We’ll have you up and around in no time.”

They started very slowly. A few times a day, Adam would stand in front of Joe and help him to stand. Joe stood for as long as his muscles would hold before sinking back to the bed. For the first few days, he was very sore which made it harder. A few times, he couldn’t even get up on his own. But eventually, with Adam’s prodding and his own stubbornness, he was able to stand up by himself.

The first day he had managed this, he looked at Adam, who was grinning and cheering his accomplishment. Joe smiled slowly, and then threw himself into his brother’s arms. From that point on, he knew he would be able to walk again.

*****

Joe shifted impatiently. “Is it ready?”

Adam was quite successful in keeping the frustration out of his voice. “Just about.” He went downstairs for two more buckets of water. “That should do it, Hop Sing,” he said, picking up the pails. “Besides, I think Joe has reached the end of his patience.”

They had decided to move Joe back into his room. There was no real reason he couldn’t, although Joe was dreading slightly going back to the place he had been held prisoner for so many days. When Adam had suggested a bath, Joe’s face had lit up. He had helped Joe wash a couple of times a week, but Adam could tell he longed to be immersed in the water. Now that his feet and the major injuries were mostly healed, it would be more comfortable for him.

Adam went upstairs and emptied the last of the water into the tub, and then he turned to Joe.

Joe pushed the blankets away, and then stood up. Carefully, shakily, he started across the room towards the tub, with Adam right in front of him in case he should fall. Yesterday, Adam had rushed into the room after hearing a loud thud to find Joe lying on the floor. After admonishing him for putting himself in danger, Adam devised a crutch he could use to move around, and insisted that he remain close to the wall when he walked by himself, so that he might not re-injure himself hitting the floor.

Joe made it over to the tub, and put his hand out to support himself.

“Good job,” praised Adam, and Joe smiled. “You’ve been practicing.”

Adam carefully pulled off his brother’s sling, and the bandage around his waist, then gently lifted him.

“I’ll rewrap your arm when you’re done. You don’t want to put any pressure on that break. The doc said your ribs should be just about healed, that will be fine to leave the bandage off.” Adam lowered him into the tub, and then helped him get settled.

Joe closed his eyes and took a deep breath, then sank under the water. He allowed it to wash completely over him.

Under the water, he felt as if it he was floating in a cloud. Everything was muted…sounds, colors, and there was a comforting weightless sensation. Joe waited a couple more seconds, and then sat up. When the water dripped from his eyes, he found Adam with an amused smile watching him.

“If you were completely better, I would have held you under, little brother,” laughed Adam.

Joe grinned. “Then it’s a good thing I’m not,” he said. “But I’m getting there,” he finished quietly.

“You certainly are,” Adam answered.

He picked up a scrub brush, and then helped Joe wash. When he was done he settled back to allow Joe some time to relax.

“You know, I think other than your arm and needing to build up strength, there’s no other signs of what happened.”

Joe nodded. “I’m really glad, Adam. The cuts on my leg healed real nice, same for the rest of the small ones. No more bruises or any other marks. I think I’ve gained back all the weight I lost.”

“Well you’ve been eating as much as Hoss, so I’d say so,” Adam laughed.

Joe laughed too, and then splashed water at his brother.

Jumping away from the water, Adam got up. “I’m going to make sure everything in your room is ready. Call if you need anything.”

Joe watched him leave, and then settled back. This was the most at peace he felt since before this whole thing had happened. The only thing that was missing was the rest of his family. Hopefully they’d find the man, and then be home again soon.

*****

A few days later Adam stood by to assist Joe should he need it, as his brother pulled himself into Cochise’s saddle. Joe had been walking a lot the last few days, and although he was still a little sore, he desperately wanted to ride again.

After he was settled, Joe urged the horse into a walk around the corral, and then into a trot, and finally into a canter.

After a couple minutes, Joe slowed him back into a walk, and then called out to Adam, “Feels great, brother!”

Adam grinned back at him and mounted his own horse.

They spent the day riding, eating, and walking; going to all their favorite places on the Ponderosa, and ending up at the lake where they watched the sun set. Finally they headed home, just after dark.

“Looks like the sheriff’s horse,” Joe said as they arrived back at the ranch.

Adam dismounted and tied the reins of his and Joe’s horses next to the sheriff’s, and then helped Joe down, who was very sore and tired. Adam put his arm around Joe’s waist, allowing his brother to lean on him as they went inside.

“Roy,” greeted Adam as they walked in the house. “I hope you haven’t had to wait long.”

Roy came towards them as they walked in.

“No, only about a half an hour. Hop Sing wasn’t sure where you had gone, but I knew you’d be back by dark.” Roy reached out and assisted Adam in getting Joe to the settee. “Are you all right there?” he asked the youngest Cartwright.

“Sure am, just a bit tired,” replied Joe. “What news do you have?”

“Well,” replied the sheriff. “Apparently this Seth Morgan’s been spotted in Texas.”

“What?” said Adam. “I though he went north from San Francisco.”

Hop Sing entered the room with three cups of coffee, which the brothers and Roy accepted gratefully.

“So did I,” said Roy, “but the sheriff in Dry Creek sent me a message, and said he was spotted there. He could have set up a false trail in San Francisco. Any way of getting word to your father?”

Adam shook his head. “They passed the last telegraph line five days ago.”

“Well, if you hear from him again, let me know. I’m not sure is this fellow really is in Texas, but he very well might be.

It makes a little more sense. If he was from there and if’n he believed no one was looking for him, he might as well go back there.”

Adam nodded. If they hadn’t found Joe alive, then they wouldn’t even have known who the man was.

Sheriff Coffee went towards the door. “I’ll let you know if I hear anything else. Thanks for the coffee.”

“Thanks, sheriff,” Adam and Joe called after him as he left.

“Adam,” Joe said. “As soon as I’m strong enough…”

Adam took a deep breath. “Are you sure you want to?”

Joe nodded.

“You might see him again,” Adam said quietly.

Joe glanced down for a moment, but then nodded. “I know…but we can’t let him get away with it. He might be gone by the time Pa and Hoss can get there. They must be a month away from Texas.”

“Probably, maybe more,” Adam nodded. “All right, as soon as you’re strong enough. We’ll leave word with a few people so they can contact Pa and Hoss when they send the next message.”

*****

Adam and Joe left a week later, with plenty of food from Hop Sing and a list of instructions from Dr. Martin. He was sure Joe’s arm was not completely healed, so he ordered him not to remove the splint or sling for at least another two weeks. Joe had protested that it must have been healed after this long, but when Dr. Martin put a certain amount of pressure on the break, Joe felt pain.

They left word at the telegraph office that should Ben or Hoss send a message, the clerk was to reply with the new information about the man’s location, and that Adam and Joe had gone after him.

When they arrived in Dry Creek, Seth Morgan had already left, but some of the townspeople pointed Adam and Joe towards the direction of the Morgan place, and told them it was a rundown farm that didn’t really amount to much.

They also revealed that only his wife was there now.

Adam and Joe had logically discussed everything, but the closer they got to the Morgan farm, the more nervous Joe became. The last thing he wanted to do was come face-to-face with his tormentor again. At least not on his ground. The plan was to see where the place was, and who was there. If Morgan was there, they were going to go back to the town and alert the authorities in the nearest larger town. The last three places they went through didn’t even have a proper sheriff, let alone a jail.

“I guess they’re all law-abiding citizens here,” Adam had wryly commented.

Joe highly doubted that. More likely any prospective sheriffs took one look at the citizens and ran.

“There.”

Joe reined in next to Adam, and looked past the clump of bushes they were behind. A little ways off, they could see a house, surrounded by a broken-down fence and various pieces of wood and damaged equipment scattered about the dirt clearing in front of it. Joe looked up at Adam. “You think that’s it?”

“You think what’s it?” a voice snapped behind them.

Joe and Adam looked to see a woman standing there, having just exited the brush on the other side of the road with a pail of wildflowers.

“Well? What are you looking for?” The woman was thin and small, and not unattractive. She looked to be older than Adam…and judging by the lines in her face and the roughness of her hands, her life had been difficult.

Adam cleared his throat. “We’re looking for the Morgan place. Is this it?”

“Yes.”

“Is…” Adam paused. “Is Seth Morgan at home?”

The woman shook her head. “He ain’t been home in months. It’s just me here now. I’m Carrie, his wife. You friends of his?”

Joe shook his head quickly. “No.”

“You the law?”

“Not exactly,” Adam said.

Carrie looked irritated. “Well if you don’t mind my askin’, who are you?”

“Adam Cartwright, and this is my brother, Joe,” he replied.

He and Joe noticed the look that crossed her face.

“He didn’t…” She looked up at Joe, and he could see her examine him with her eyes, observing his still-bandaged arm.

When she caught his gaze, he couldn’t force himself to look away.

“He didn’t what, ma’am?” Adam asked.

Carrie looked up at Adam as he spoke, and said, “At least let me offer you some water, for you and your animals,” and started across the field towards the house, the pail of flowers in tow.

Adam and Joe exchanged a look before dismounting and following her. Whatever she knew, they suddenly wanted to find out.

She led them to the trough next to the barn, and as their horses drank she fetched a pail of water from the well.

“Thank you, ma’am,” Adam said as he took the cup she offered him. He drank from it, and then handed it to Joe. “You run all this by yourself?”

Carrie took the cup from Joe and thought for a moment before looking up at Adam.

“I will say, it’s not easy. I have a small garden in the back, with enough vegetables for me, and extra to sell. Mr. Brody down the road helps me out as well. It…” she paused, and looked away. “It don’t take the place of a man around here, though.” She put the cup back on the hook on the side of the well.

“Where did he go?” asked Adam after a few moments.

She looked evenly at him. “Why?”

Joe took a step forward. “We want to know if it’s the same man.”

Carrie looked at him, staring at his bandages for a moment before asking, “Did he go after you?”

Joe swallowed, and then hoarsely answered, “Yes.”

She gazed at him. Joe could see the look of sorrow in her eyes.

“I am truly sorry,” she said quietly. “There was nothing I could do…” She trailed off, staring into space. “There was nothing.”

Joe and Adam exchanged a look as she turned away from them. “Please excuse me,” she said, and then walked away towards the overgrown field.

Joe watched her as she left, and then looked at Adam. “She must have known he was going to do this.”

“Maybe,” Adam replied. “She certainly knew he was going to do something.” Adam tugged Sport towards one of the sections of fence that wasn’t in pieces and tied the reigns around it. He looked back at Joe. “I’m going to find out what. You coming?”

Joe nodded and then tied his horse next to Adam’s. Together they walked across the field towards the tree where Carrie was standing, staring at something on the ground. As they came to a stop next to her, they saw what she was looking at. “Whose grave is this?” Adam asked quietly.

Carrie knelt down and ran her hand over the plain wooden crosses that adorned the ground.

“They died too young. Bridgett was seven, Willie was nine. The doctors…the doctors said it was fever…” Carrie looked up at Adam, tears glistening in her eyes. “He hasn’t been the same since. He left…I think it was too much for him. It killed him inside…I saw it. He died the day we buried them…” Carrie dropped her head, crying quietly with her shoulders shaking.

Adam stood quietly for a few moments. “Ma’am, I’m sorry…”

“Don’t be. I couldn’t stop him. He blamed your father for everything.”

“Why?” asked Joe. “What did my father do?”

She stood up, wiping her tears with her apron. “It’s what he didn’t do. We tried to buy some land from your father, years ago, but he wouldn’t sell the land my husband wanted. Your father was going to try to help him settle some land further north, but it wasn’t good enough for my husband. He felt the southern pasture was better, and he wouldn’t listen to anything your father had to say.”

Joe frowned. “But the southern area floods every spring. That’s not good settling land.”

“I know,” Carrie whispered. “But he wouldn’t listen to reason. We came out here, bought this land. It hasn’t been easy. We’ve had to fight for everything we have, but then things started to get better. The crops were finally doing well. We were able to buy some more land. He started to believe in himself again. He started to be proud of himself again.”

“What happened?” Adam asked.

Carrie looked at the little graves next to her feet. “It happened so fast. Seth did what he could, but there wasn’t anything else he could do. That anyone could do. He’s a very stubborn man, especially when he gets an idea set in his head. He had to blame someone, so he blamed your father. He always felt if he’d been able to settle in Nevada, we would have had money, and anything else we wanted.” She took a deep breath and stood up a little straighter. “I never wanted money. I just wanted my husband, and my family, and for this farm to be something from the hard work we put into it.”

She paused. “Now I don’t have any of it,” she finished quietly, and then turned and walked back towards the house.

Adam and Joe watched her walk inside. Finally Joe spoke. “You think there’s anything we can do to help?”

Adam glanced at him with a trace of a smile. He knew that his brother might say something like that. “I thought you wanted to get out of here as fast as you could.”

Joe shrugged, not noticing his slightly teasing tone. “I know. But…she…hasn’t done anything wrong. He hurt her too.”

Joe looked up at his older brother. “Why don’t we find out if there’s something we can do to help? I’m sure we could fix something…or, well, you could fix something…” he said, glancing at his bandaged arm.

Adam rolled his eyes. “Why is it I’m always stuck doing the work?”

Joe grinned cockily. “I don’t know, Adam. I guess those brains of yours are good for something…hey!” Joe ducked as Adam swung at him. Adam shook his head and put his arm around his brother, then they went back towards the house.

*****

As they rode into the town, Joe couldn’t help but survey it with distaste. The buildings, streets…even the signs were filthy. “Who would want to live here?” he said quietly to Adam.

Adam shook his head. He was almost afraid to breathe it was so dirty. “I guess them,” he said, indicating the sordid men and women along the street. Some of them watched the two Cartwrights ride past, while others ignored them. Some, seeing their better, more expensive clothes and gear, shouted obscenities as they rode by. Carrie had given them the names of a couple of towns that she knew her husband used to frequent, and they had been traveling through them the last couple of weeks. In the last town, someone mentioned this one as being the place Seth Morgan now lived. They sent another wire to Virginia City, updating the sheriff of the new information, and then came here.

They dismounted in front of a not-so-grimy looking saloon, tying the reins to the post in front, and then went inside.

The atmosphere of the room was distinctly unsavory; the air was heavy with dirt and malevolence. Adam and Joe exchanged a glance, and then went to the bar. “Two beers,” Adam said, and then took the mugs the bartender handed them. They moved to the back of the room, and sat down at a gloomy corner table. Joe glanced around the room. The person they were looking for was distinctive, but only among normal, upright people. Among these low-lifes, a man like that could blend in easily, and remain incognito no matter how hard they searched. They were hoping to listen to the word around town, and see if anyone mentioned his name. It would be dangerous now to ask questions.

Several people came and went as they slowly drank their beers. None of them, or the other men in the place, were familiar to Joe. Their drinks finished, Adam and Joe left, trying to gather as little attention as possible. They stood out here.

Outside, as they readied their horses to leave, Adam said quietly, “We can’t just go from place to place. Someone will get suspicious.”

“What do you suggest, staying here?” Joe replied in equal tone as he finished adjusting Cochise’s girth.

“That’s what I’m thinking. We could check in at that hotel, and get some supper, and then go to one of the other places down the street.” Adam mounted his horse.

“What if people ask what we’re doing here?” Joe said as he swung carefully into the saddle, still favoring his newly unbandaged arm.

Adam finally looked over at him, and then said with a wry smile, “Knock them senseless for asking.”

Joe shook his head and rolled his eyes, but he knew that Adam was only half joking. There was a not-so-grimy hotel about halfway through town, boasting baths, so they got a room there for the night. It was a bit less disgusting than the rest of the places they had seen in town, but neither of them felt like testing if the bath was any cleaner. The restaurant next door served a rather unappetizing dinner, and Joe hardly ate. It wasn’t entirely from the quality of the meal, though. He was getting more uneasy the longer they remained in this town. The uncomfortable feeling of being watched and the malice the town boasted were making him jumpy; afraid that someone was going to sneak up behind him at any moment or pull a gun without warning.

As soon as they were finished, they left and headed towards a saloon farther down the street. This one seemed a bit more rowdy; there were several tables of men talking and laughing loudly, playing cards and drinking. They paid no attention to the two Cartwrights. Adam and Joe went up to the bar, and ordered their beers. Just as they were about to turn to the back of the room, someone yelled, “Morgan!” Several other men joined in greeting the newest arrival, and Adam glanced at Joe. “That’s him,” Joe whispered so quietly Adam almost didn’t hear him. Joe’s face had gone pale, and he was staring intently at the drink in front of him.

Adam looked at the man who had just entered, who was talking and laughing with some of the other patrons. For the first time, Adam saw the man who had tried to kill his brother. He looked as mean and callous as the town he now lived in. It was hard to imagine him as the loving husband and father whom Carrie now missed.

Seth Morgan pounded one of the men on the back, and then turned towards the bar. “Wait, I’m gonna get me a drink,” he called as he started across the room.

Joe froze as he heard the man coming closer. He closed his eyes, wishing he were invisible as he heard Seth’s footsteps slow. The man stopped behind him, and the seconds seemed to crawl by, until he felt his hair being grabbed and his head was yanked back. Joe found himself looking into the face of the man who had filled his nightmares for the past months.

“Well, well, well…” Seth said, and then released him. “I thought I killed you.”

Joe knew Adam had moved as soon as the man touched him, and now his brother was standing slightly in front of him, shielding Joe. He was glad he was there; Adam’s presence had helped him not to betray the terror that had taken over him. Forcing himself to swallow back the feeling, he replied, “I don’t die that easy.”

Seth laughed. “Always a smart answer.” He picked up the glass of whiskey the bartender handed him, and drank it in one mouthful. He picked up the bottle, and turned towards the table where his friends were waiting, tensed as they watched the scene in front of them.

“You’re not going to get away with it,” Adam said, stopping the man in his tracks.

Seth slowly turned, and scrutinized Adam for a few moments before replying, “Who are you?”

“Adam Cartwright.”

“You’re as much a hothead as your brother, aren’t you?”

Adam refused to be provoked. “You can come quietly or we’ll come back with a sheriff.”

Seth barked out a laugh. “Sheriff? What crime did I commit?”

“You tried to kill me,” Joe replied, quietly but firmly.

Seth walked back to them, and stood right in front of Joe. The man stood a head higher, and was a great deal bigger than the youngest Cartwright.

Joe felt his heart start to beat faster, as familiar feelings of fear and helplessness started to overtake him. He felt anger rise with the realization that this man still made him afraid. He wasn’t tied to a bed anymore, the hunger and thirst and indignity of being left for days driving him to desperation. Begging for a sip of water to take away the dry pain in his throat. Terrified that his family might come home too late, or even worse, that they might come home and be subjected to the same torment he had been forced to bear.

By the expression on Seth’s face, Joe knew that the man realized he still had some power to intimidate him. Seth smiled, and leaned close to Joe. “You’re not going to turn me in, are you, Little Joe Cartwright?” Joe forced back a shudder as the man put his hand on Joe’s shoulder. Adam pushed it away. Seth cast a glare at him, and then looked back at Joe. “I think we both know exactly what would happen when I got out of prison…that is, if I was even sent there.

Why don’t you just forget the whole thing?”

Anger darkened Joe’s face. “No,” he snapped. “You’re not going to get away from paying for what you’ve done by trying to frighten me with stupid threats. You’re going to jail.”

Seth laughed. “Stupid threats? Sonny, if you send me to jail, your father will be the first that I go after when I get out.”

His laugh was cut off when Joe’s fist made contact with his jaw. The blow was firm and took him by surprise, and he was knocked to the ground.

Within seconds, the other men in the room were out of their seats, but before they could reach him Joe jerked his gun out of the holster and leveled it at the man on the floor. “Don’t move!” Joe snapped, and everyone froze uncomfortably, unsure of what to do. Seth looked up at him for a few seconds, and then started to laugh.

“Don’t move?” Seth snorted. “What if I did move…what would you do, Little Joe Cartwright?”

Joe glared at him, and the man met his gaze with a sneer. Seth pushed himself up to his knees. “I said, don’t move,” Joe said.

Seth stood up. “I know what you said…now what are you going to do about it?”

Joe forced himself to keep looking at the man in front him; to ignore the mocking smile on his face. He felt the cold hard metal of the trigger under his finger. The gun seemed to be gaining weight in his hand, and he tensed his muscles, fighting against any shakiness or wavering. He could not let him win.

“What are you going to do?” Seth asked. “Shoot me? Go ahead…shoot.”

Joe could picture it now…the gun recoiling in his hand, and the lethal bullet flying, striking sharply in Seth’s chest. The man falling to the ground, blood staining the floor, those hate-filled eyes closing, his family safe…

“Shoot!” Seth yelled.

What does it feel like to kill a man in cold blood?

Seth laughed. “I don’t think you have enough guts to do it. You pretend to be so brave on the other side of that gun. You’re not…we both know you’re not. Did you tell your brother everything that happened? How you cried like a snotnosed little brat? I hope you didn’t tell him you took everything like a man; we both know it’s not true.”

“Shut up!” snapped Joe.

“Joe, don’t…” Adam said. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Did you tell your brother how you begged me to stop hurting you? Just end it, you said. End it!” Morgan laughed. “We both know you’re not man enough to pull that trigger.”

“Joe.”

Joe heard his brother, but he didn’t shift his angry glare.

“Go ahead, shoot!” the man laughed.

Joe’s finger tensed on the trigger, and for a split second, he almost made himself pull it. He glanced down at the gun in his hand, and then looked at Adam. He looked up at the man once more…and then backed away as he slowly lowered the weapon. “No,” he said quietly. “What you did was wrong, but I’m not going to make it worse by actually committing a murder. You’re going to jail.”

Seth muttered something, and before Joe realized what had happened he was on the floor, blood streaming from his lip from the force of the blow. He kicked out, and the older man was knocked to the floor. Joe was on him in an instant. He managed two swift punches to Seth’s face, before the man pushed him away. Joe started to get up, but he found himself being pulled to his feet. He felt an arm wrap around his neck from behind, and his arms were pulled behind his back.

Looking past the men who were starting to surround him, he saw Adam being held by three men, and another one had a gun pointed to his head. His view was cut off by a rough looking man in a dirty blue shirt. “This is for pulling a gun on Morgan,” he muttered, and then Joe doubled over in pain as he was punched harshly in the stomach.

“No,” he heard Seth snap, and then the men holding him allowed him to fall to the floor. “I’ll take care of him.”

Joe rolled away and pushed himself off the floor as the man came towards him. He ducked Morgan’s first swing, and blocked the second with his arm while throwing a punch of his own. His hand stung from the force of the blow, but he barely registered the pain. Morgan grabbed the front of his shirt, and then threw him backwards into a table. It struck Joe solidly in the back, and he slid onto the floor, landing with a crash in a pile of chairs. Rolling over, he started to push himself up but was interrupted by Morgan’s boot landing sharply in his side. He grunted as he was kicked again, and reached for a piece of one of the broken chairs, swinging it into the man’s shin. Seth howled in pain, and lost his balance, falling on the floor with a loud thud.

Joe stood up and looked towards Adam. His brother had broken away from the men who had been holding him, but was struggling to remain free as five men tried to overtake him. Joe frowned, and started to move towards them when a fierce pain erupted in his right arm. He cried out and clutched it with his free hand, looking up to see Morgan holding the solid piece of wood he had just struck him with.

Joe stared at him, shocked, as waves of pain cascaded through his arm and shoulder. He vaguely heard the struggle behind him cease, as Adam was overtaken. Morgan sneered at him. “Was that your injured arm?” he asked, cruelty and sarcasm tainting his words. The man struck out, and Joe found himself on the floor with Morgan on top of him, using his weight to hold Joe to the floor. It was all Joe could do to keep from screaming out in pain and terror. “Let him go-“ he heard Adam yell, before he was cut off. Joe could hear them punching, beating his brother, and he tried to struggle away.

“No…” he gasped as Seth tightened his hands around Joe’s neck. It took every ounce of strength he had, but he managed to push the man off of himself. Joe rolled off the floor, gasping for breath, and looked over at the other man.

Seth stood up and started towards him again, but Joe said, “My father didn’t kill your children.”

Seth froze, staring at him, pure fury in his face. “You shut your mouth, Cartwright,” he growled. “You know nothing about that.”

“I know enough to know it wasn’t my father’s fault.”

Seth stared angrily at him for a few seconds, and then reached down and pulled out his gun, pointing it straight at Joe.

There was no trace of false amusement or mocking smile on his face.

“Drop it!” Joe heard someone yell, but before he could turn towards the familiar voice, three shots rang out. Joe couldn’t break his gaze from Seth; he waited for the look of achievement on his face, a laugh, anything that would acknowledge what he had just accomplished- murder. Instead, a frown furrowed his brow, and a confused look crossed his face. Seth looked down, and when he did, Joe’s gaze dropped too…to the dark red stain spreading across Seth’s shirt. Joe glanced down at his own clothing. It was clean. He looked back up as Seth fell onto the floor, dropping the gun. It was then Joe started to realize the only pain in his body was the sharp sting from his arm, and he hadn’t been shot. Seth’s bullet had missed him.

He glanced towards the door, where Ben and Hoss stood, guns still held ready, in case anyone else should try anything.

He looked back at Seth, who was holding his hand over the bleeding spot on his chest. “Why did you do it?” Joe asked, not really expecting an answer.

Seth snorted, and then coughed, as the pool of blood spread underneath him. “Easiest way to hurt a man like Ben Cartwright. Hurt his son,” he choked out. The man’s sick smile faded and he slumped to the floor.

Joe slowly shook his head. “But…why…?” he whispered. There was a groan, and Joe looked up to see Adam lying almost unconscious on the floor. Quickly standing, he went to his brother and pulled Adam’s arm around his shoulders to help support him. “Come on,” he whispered, and then, with Hoss’s help, he carried Adam out of the saloon. Outside, Joe led the way to Cochise, where he and Hoss set their brother in the saddle. Joe started to swing up in front of him, but Hoss tugged his shirt. Joe looked back to see his brother staring, concerned, at him. Joe smiled slightly, trying to ease his worries. “Hoss…I have to help him,” he said quietly. His brother glanced at their father, who was still in the doorway of the saloon, and then nodded and helped Joe into the saddle in front of Adam. There was no time for arguments. Hoss helped Joe pull Adam’s arms over his shoulders so he could hold him up, and then he mounted his own horse.

Ben quickly joined them, grabbing the reins of Adam’s horse, and then they rode out of town. They kept up a steady pace, weaving their way through the rocky pass and across a stream, doing their best to leave no trail for any angry saloon patrons to follow. It was almost dark by the time they stopped a few hours later. Little conversation had been exchanged during the ride, particularly because Joe was trying to focus all his remaining strength on keeping his brother firmly behind him. Ben and Hoss had tried several times to relieve him of carrying Adam, seeing the bruises and look of pain on his face, but each time he had refused.

They came to a stop in a little sheltered area in some rocks, and Ben and Hoss quickly went to Joe, who was still stiffly seated on his horse, tightly holding Adam’s arms around his shoulders with one hand, and his newly injured arm lying weakly in his lap, reins looped through his fingers. Their arrival in the clearing was a tribute to the bond that he shared with Cochise; he had been physically unable to give his horse any directions the last few miles, and any other horse might have taken its freedom and made the ride more difficult, but Cochise followed closely to the others, seeming to know the seriousness of his rider’s inability to lead.

Joe saw his father reaching for him, and he finally allowed himself to let go. He felt the saddle slipping away beneath him, and his father’s hands catching him before he fell. His father lifted him, so carefully, and set him on the ground.

“Here son, drink this.” Joe looked down to see Ben holding a canteen to his lips, and he gratefully sipped the water. The trees started to become blurry, as exhaustion began to overtake him. He forced himself to look towards his father.

“Pa…” he forced out. “Glad you made it,” he whispered, and then surrendered to the growing darkness.

*****

Joe grunted in pain as Hoss ran his hands over his arm. “I don’t think it’s broken,” Hoss said. “Seems it’s just badly bruised. Does it feel like it’s broken?”

Joe shook his head. “I oughta know,” he muttered. As soon as he had awoke this morning, his father had given him some food and then Hoss thoroughly examined him. The only serious injury seemed to be his arm.

“I’m gonna wrap it just to make sure,” Hoss said, and then got up to get some cloths and a splint.

Joe sank back against the tree, and looked at the large bruise on his arm. It hadn’t hurt so much when it happened as taken him completely by surprise. The expression on the man’s face flashed in front of him, and he closed his eyes. He didn’t understand. He thought that finding the man who had hurt and tried to kill him would answer his questions, but it didn’t, really. Now he was left with more questions, and the frustration of knowing they would never be answered.

Joe felt movement near him, and he opened his eyes to see his oldest brother.

“How are you doing?” Adam asked.

Joe snorted. “Just fine,” he said, bitterness tingeing his tone. He looked at the bandage around Adam’s ribs, and the bruises on his face. “How about you?”

Adam smiled slightly. “I’ve been hurt worse.” He sat down next to Joe, leaning on the tree. “You know,” he said quietly. “I really am proud of you for what you did yesterday. You did the right thing. It would have been so easy to pull the trigger.”

Joe looked down, and then nodded. “It was so hard not to. I…almost talked myself into pulling it, Adam. I just…wanted him to die for what he did, but I couldn’t do it. It would have been wrong. No better than what he did.” Joe picked up a twig, fingering it and then breaking it into pieces before finally looking up at his brother. “It wasn’t fair, Adam,” he whispered.

Adam watched as tears started to slip down his brother’s face, and Joe put his hand over his eyes. Adam reached out and wrapped his arms around his brother’s shoulders, and as soon as he touched him, Joe buried his head in his shoulder, sobbing.

Adam just held his brother tightly, allowing him to come to terms with what happened. With what had happened in the last two months. To finally realize, to know, that he was the one who had triumphed.

 

THE END