Summary:  Ben falls in love with a mirror image of his first wife.
Rating:  PG  (56,100 words)

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VOICE FROM THE PAST

 

CHAPTER 1

 

‘I’ve already done more than my share of the chores today, if you’re so all fired worried about that fence, why don’t you check it out.’  Hoss grumbled, turning away from his older brother to warm his hands at the fire.

‘You’re beginning to sound like Joe.  If he hadn’t disappeared, you wouldn’t have had extra chores to do, so blame him, not me.’  Adam snapped back.

The strain of being in charge for three weeks was getting harder to handle every day.  Although it was almost two years since he had come back from college, he knew that many of the ranch hands still only tolerated him as a boss, rather than respected him as they did his father, and it was sometimes hard to get the work done to his satisfaction.

‘I intend to, when I can get hold of him.’

Hoss was slow to anger but his temper was beginning to rise.  Joe had left the yard early this morning without doing his chores, so he was free of Adam’s bad mood and Hoss felt the injustice of being a substitute.  Adam was getting more bad tempered and dictatorial the longer Pa was away.

‘All I asked you to do was ride down to the meadows and check the fence around that new strain of grass Pa is trying out.  I can’t do everything.  I don’t think it’s unreasonable to ask you to help.’  Adam sighed.

‘Well I do.  I plan to go into town.  It is Saturday after all, I think I’ve earned an afternoon off.’  Hoss spoke in sharp bursts, as he tried to control his temper.

Adam hesitated, he didn’t want to give in, but neither did he want a full scale confrontation with Hoss.  He didn’t often have disagreements with his younger brother.  He could usually persuade him to do what he wanted, but on this occasion he was certain that Hoss would not give in without a fight and that he wanted to avoid.

‘Alright, I’ll go myself.’  he conceded ‘But that little brother of ours had better stay out of my way tonight, if he knows what’s good for him.’

Adam went out of the house and slammed the front door with a bang sufficient to rattle the windows.

 

By the time he got back from checking the fence, Hoss was long gone and the house was quiet.  This suited Adam’s mood and he decided to settle down with a book and relax.  There had been no problem with the fence, indeed he hadn’t really expected that there would be, it was just that while he was in charge, he felt the need to check everything at least twice.

He opened his book but his mind kept wandering over the events since his father’s departure.  Nothing had gone wrong exactly. The work was all done and his only problems had been with his brothers and he reluctantly had to admit that they were mostly of his own making.  He had been hard on both of them, particularly on Joe, who had retaliated by being more difficult than usual.  He guessed that his little brother had gone off this morning to meet up with Travis Simmons again.   Adam could not understand the friendship. Simmons was a thoroughly bad influence, his father and brother were in jail and another brother had been killed by Ben when they had been caught rustling Ponderosa cattle.  If Pa found out that Joe was spending time with him there would be big trouble.  Adam had pointed this out to his young brother only yesterday.  It was strange, as if Simmons had some kind of fascination for Joe because of his background….. and why was Simmons friendly with a boy nearly two years younger than he was.

Adam puzzled on the question for a few moments but could find no answers.  His thoughts then turned to Hoss.   He knew he had been pushing him to the limit, but Hoss was usually so easy going.  This time he had obviously gone too far and Hoss had resented it, hence his stubborn refusal to give up his afternoon off.  At some point in his musings, he must have dozed off for the next thing he knew was Hop Sing’s voice in his ear.

‘Mr Adam, I cook supper now.’  the sing song tones came to him.

‘Supper?   What time is it Hop Sing?’  he mumbled, still drowsy from sleep.  He stretched lazily and his book fell to the floor.

‘Six o’clock, Mr Adam.  How many I cook for?’  Hop Sing asked.

Adam jumped from his chair ‘Did you say six.  Where are Hoss and Joe?’

Hop Sing’s expression did not change ‘They not back yet.’  he said.

‘What!  They should be doing the chores by now.’  he crossed to the door and looked out, but there was no sign of anyone in the yard.

‘Mr Hoss say he not back for supper.  Little Joe, he not say anything.’  Hop Sing informed him.

He went out into the yard and crossed to the barn, leaving a bewildered Hop Sing still none the wiser about his cooking arrangements.

 

Adam worked his way steadily through the evening chores and as he worked his temper grew shorter.  He roundly cursed Hoss for going into town, and it was just as well that Joe was not within his grasp.  By the time he had finished he was in a thoroughly bad mood and ready to do battle.

It was unfortunate for Joe that he was first through the door, Hoss was just behind his little brother, but that was enough to save him from the first onslaught.  Adam was seated alone at the supper table and Hop Sing had just served him with a steak and had gone back to the kitchen for vegetables.  Joe edged his way in cautiously, he guessed he would be in trouble for rushing off without finishing his chores this morning and he had hoped that he wouldn’t be too late to do the evening tasks, but that hope had been short lived.

Adam rose to his feet as soon as he saw his young brother.

‘Where the hell have you been?’ he said, his voice dangerously quiet and his expression one of barely controlled fury.

Joe was surprised at the ferocity of the attack, but he knew the look and the tone only too well, they were almost exact replicas of his father’s.  There was no doubt that he was in trouble here.

‘I’ve had to do all your chores and Hoss’s and I won’t put up with it.  Pa gave me authority to discipline you if I felt it necessary, and I do.  He advanced towards Joe and grabbed him by the arm.

Joe tried to shake of his grip but it was too firm.

‘I don’t know what you’re so mad about,  I just forgot the time, that’s all.  I’ll do extra tomorrow.’  he tried to look unconcerned in the face of his brother’s anger.

‘That’s not good enough.  Pa’s far too soft with you.  Well you don’t get off so lightly with me.’  Adam’s expression was hard and uncompromising.

He marched Joe to the bottom of the staircase and was about to push him upstairs when Hoss intervened.

‘Cool down, Adam.  I did Joe’s chores this morning, so you’re not that hard done by and he’s said he’ll make it up.’

Adam released Joe’s arm as he turned on his brother ‘You’re no better, you went off this afternoon without telling me when you’d be back.’  he said angrily.

Hoss was normally mild mannered and accommodating but today he’d had as much of Adam’s temper as he was going to take.

‘I don’t have to answer to you for my free time.  I’ve done more than my share of the work and all you’ve done is complain.’

‘I am in charge while Pa’s away and …….’

Hoss advanced towards his older brother ‘Yeah, you’re in charge and don’t we know it.  You ever stop to listen to yourself.  All you’ve done since Pa left is issue your orders.  Well I’ve had enough.  I do my work and I don’t need you to yell at me.’

Hoss was now worked into a fair temper and he stood very close to his brother almost threatening him.

Adam was too stubborn to back down and his temper which had boiled all day suddenly exploded without thought for the consequences.

‘You’ll do as I say’ he yelled and jabbed his finger at his brother’s chest as he spoke.

It was a fairly mild gesture but it was enough to push Hoss over the edge and he retaliated by pushing his brother hard so that he fell against the staircase.  Adam caught the newel post with one hand and took a fairly wild swing at Hoss with the other.  Almost without either of them realising what was happening they were fighting.

Joe, who had been watching and listening from the bottom step, silently cheering Hoss’s challenge, retreated a few steps further up the staircase.  He had not expected things to go this far and he was just a little nervous.  Usually, when fights developed between his brothers, which was not often, Pa was here to stop them.  This time there was no such restraint.

Hearing the noise from the kitchen Hop Sing rushed in and began yelling at them in English and Chinese to stop.  But neither heard nor heeded his words.

At first Hoss’s responses were half hearted, he knew his strength only too well and he still had some control of his temper, but as Adam increased the momentum of the fight, so did he, until all reason had gone from both of them.  Furniture was overturned and a china vase at the bottom of the staircase smashed, but nothing halted the fight.  The more violent it became, the further Joe retreated until he was on the half landing looking down on them.  Hop Sing had gone back to his kitchen and emerged with a broom.  To Joe’s surprise the diminutive Chinese cook did not seem in the least afraid of intervening.  He hit both protagonists across the shoulders with his broom with sufficient force to make Adam stagger into his brother.  Hoss hardly felt the blow from the broom and took advantage of his brother lack of balance to strike out at him, making him collapse across their father’s desk, scattering its contents to the floor.  The sound of breaking glass seemed to bring them to their senses, particularly Hoss, who watched in horror as Adam bent to retrieve the gold framed picture of his mother which had fallen to the floor. Adam stared at the picture with its dented frame and glass shattered into several fragments.  He looked up at his younger brother with shock and anger.

Hoss stood back amazed at what he had done, his temper cooling almost immediately.  He backed away to the stairs as Adam advanced towards him again, clutching the damaged picture.  Hoss did not know what to say or do and he hurriedly pushed past Joe and retreated to his room.  Adam felt his anger draining away and the hot temper being replaced with guilt.  He turned around and took a deep breath to calm himself.  He took in the scene of devastation in the living room and fully appreciated just how serious the fight had been.  Then he glanced down at the damaged picture, this was going to be difficult to explain to Pa, those three gold frames and the pictures they contained were more than just precious to him.  To have to tell him how it had been damaged was not going to be easy.

 

Joe descended the stairs open mouthed at the scene before him. He waited for Adam to yell at him and send him to his room, but his brother seemed lost in thought.  Joe never could keep quiet for long and this was too good an opportunity to miss.

‘Wow, what a mess.  Pa’s goin’ to be real mad at you two.’  he said with a half smile.

Adam looked up from the picture ‘Well, since you think it so funny, you can help me clear up.’

Joe shook his head ‘Not me, I didn’t do anything.’

‘Huh….. It was you who started it, like always.  So unless you want Pa to find out your part in it you had better give me a hand.’

Joe sighed and nodded ‘Ok, I get the idea.’

Together they began to right the chairs and clear up the broken china and glass.  Hop Sing’s only contribution was to hand Adam the broom.

Adam took it from him with a guilty look ‘Sorry, Hop Sing.  I guess things kinda got out of hand.’

Hop Sing shrugged and muttered something in Chinese before returning to his kitchen and the ruined vegetables.

When the room looked more as it should, Joe crossed to the sofa and sat down. He picked up the picture frame from the table and looked intently at the picture of Elizabeth.

‘How are you going to explain this to Pa?’ he asked.

Adam took the frame from him with a worried frown ‘I don’t know, maybe I can get it fixed in town.’  he fingered the dent in the top of the frame ‘The glass should be easy to get but I don’t know if the jeweller will be able to fix the frame.  If he can’t……..well Pa is going to be pretty angry.’

 

Upstairs, Hoss sat on his bed, with his head in his hands.  What had happened to him?  It was several years since he had so thoroughly lost control.   When he had been much younger he had learned that because of his size, he could not indulge his temper, the way his friends did.  When let loose, his temper could be damaging.  Pa had helped him to endure the taunts that his size brought and to take the teasing in good part, without resorting to violence.  As a youngster he had fought often, but gradually he had managed to control those feelings.  Why had it all gone wrong tonight?

He got up and started to pace the floor.  True, Adam had been difficult to live with since Pa had been away.  Hoss guessed that his older brother was feeling the strain of responsibility but that didn’t excuse his high handed behaviour, did it?  But somehow deep down, Hoss knew that he was the one at fault.  He should not have started the fight, his father would be disappointed in him.  He knew how angry Adam must be o ver the picture and he knew his father would be too, when he heard about it.  He was about to go downstairs to apologise when there was a timid knock at his door.

‘Can I come in?’  Joe peeped cautiously around the barely open door.

Hoss nodded ‘Sure, come on in.  I could do with someone to talk to.’

Joe looked relieved, his brother seemed more his old self now, the Hoss of an hour before had frightened him a little.   Hoss patted the bed beside him.

‘Sit here and tell me whether Adam’s still out to skin me alive.’

Joe bounced down on to the feather quilt and Hoss automatically pushed his brother’s feet back to the floor.

‘He’s pretty much calmed down now.  He even forgot to send me to bed.’  he looked admiringly at his big brother ‘You sure taught him a lesson.’

Hoss sighed. ‘It’s not something I’m proud of, so don’t you go making it out to be something its not.  Pa’ll be real angry when he hears.’

‘But Hoss, he deserved it, he’s been bossy ever since Pa went away.’  Joe complained.

‘That’s because he is the boss.  Pa left him in charge and we should both do as he says.’  he gave his little brother a concerned look ‘It’s hard being responsible for the ranch and for us, and we should be helping him not making it more difficult.  I was wrong and I’m going to tell him so in a minute.’

Joe looked up into his brother’s face, horrified .

‘You’re not going to apologise, are you?’

‘Sure I am.’  he stared hard at Joe ‘…and so are you for cutting chores.’

Joe shook his head ‘Not me, he’s already had me clearing up.’

Hoss took Joe by the arm and led him to the door ‘Yes, you as well.’

 

Hoss was relieved to discover that Joe had been right.  Adam did seem to have calmed down.  He was seated in his favourite chair immersed in a book.  That was a good sign.  Adam’s way of relaxing was always with a book, at this moment the outside world didn’t exist for him.  Hoss hoped that interrupting him wouldn’t bring back his temper.  As he reached the bottom step, he cleared his throat noisily hoping his brother would look up.

Adam was aware of their presence but he wanted Hoss to make the first move, without looking up he turned the page of his novel. ‘Did you want something?’ he said quietly.

‘Yeah, Joe and I wanted to apologise.’  Hoss said nervously, wishing his brother would put the book down and pay attention.  It was hard to judge Adam’s mood when he could not see his face properly.

Adam closed the book very slowly and deliberately and put it on the table. ‘I guess we both got a little too heated.’  Adam said very softly.  The intensity of the fight had scared him, he hadn’t seen Hoss that angry since he was a small boy and it was the first time for years that they had really fought with each other.

Hoss gave a relieved sigh, he hated it when anyone was angry with him ‘I’m really sorry Adam, we should be helping you while Pa’s away.’

Adam grinned ‘Well you won’t have to put up with me giving orders for much longer.  One of the hands brought the mail and there’s a letter from Pa, he says he’ll be finished in San Francisco in a few days, so I guess he is already on his way home.’

At this news Joe came to life. ‘Do you think he’ ll bring us anything?’

Adam smiled ‘What makes you think any of us deserve a present, little brother?’

Hoss gave a rueful grin ‘Yeah, I guess we’re goin’ to have a lot of explaining to do.’  He hesitated and then cleared his throat again ‘I’m sorry about the picture, Adam.  Is it badly damaged.’

Adam nodded ‘Bad enough, I just hope the jeweller in Virginia City can do something with it.’

‘If it’s repaired, why does Pa have to know anything?’  Joe asked hopefully.

Adam laughed ‘Joe the eternal optimist.  If we don’t tell him, he’ll find out, somehow he always does.  But don’t worry little brother, there are compensations for being the baby.  I was left in charge, so I guess I take the responsibility.’

For once Joe didn’t rise to the bait, he was content to be the baby on this occasion.

Hoss shook his head ‘Not this time Adam, we’re all in this together.’

‘There’s something else we all need to do together.’  Adam grinned.

‘What’s that?’  Joe asked.

‘Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m starving and somehow we have to get into the kitchen and get some sandwiches or something without Hop Sing taking a broom to us again.’

Hoss gave Adam a knowing look ‘Yeah, you go little brother, he never gets so mad at you.’

Joe backed away ‘Come on, that’s not fair.’

Adam nodded ‘Yeah, Joe.  Hoss is right, you can twist him around your finger.  Anyway, like I said being the youngest has compensations, you get to look after your big brothers.’

Both brothers fixed him with a stare and Joe knew he had just lost the argument.

He sighed ‘Ok, Ok, I’ll go but don’t blame me, if I end up in the sandwiches.’

His brothers just laughed, the best of friends again.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 2

 

 

The seagulls circling over head and their mournful cry, reminded Ben Cartwright of his youth and his days at sea.  He walked slowly along the waterfront, sometimes stopping for a moment to watch the activity around the ships, loading and unloading on the wharf.  The clipper ships with their promise of far off places, still held a fascination for him even after all these years.  This was a long way from his home town of Boston, and he supposed, he had travelled a fair distance himself, since those days, in more ways than one.  Then he had been a sailor with not much money and no commitments, now he was a wealthy rancher with many people dependent on his continued success.  He stopped and leaned against one of the bollards that lined the wharf.

He was in San Francisco to complete an important shipping contract which would provide for his timber, from the slopes of the Sierras, to be carried back east to Boston and other east coast cities.  It had taken longer than expected, and he had been away from home for nearly three weeks already.  With any luck, it would all be signed this afternoon and he could get the boat to Sacramento tomorrow.

He looked out across the bay and wondered how his sons had managed without him.  Adam had run the ranch before, but not for such a long period and Ben worried about how he would deal with any crisis which might arise.  Hoss was old enough to be a help, but the final responsibility would rest with his eldest son.  He also worried about his youngest son.  Joe’s habit of finding trouble didn’t seem to get any less as he got older, in fact Ben sometimes felt it was getting worse.  At fourteen he was more of a handful than he had ever been and his relationship with his oldest brother could, at times, be a powder keg waiting for the match. At least Hoss would do his best to keep the peace between them. He shook his head to clear the negative thoughts and decided to head back towards the lawyer’s office where he would sign the contract, then he could get home and set his mind at rest.

Suddenly, he thought he saw a familiar figure on the other side of the street.  For a moment he was taken back in time. Liz, he almost said the name out loud.  As quickly as the thought came to him it was dismissed for the fantasy it was.  His beloved Liz had died nearly twenty six years ago, his mind must be playing tricks on him.  He looked again, the resemblance was remarkable, an older version to be sure, but then Liz would have been older now.  The more he looked, the more convinced he became that he was looking at his first love, as she would have been had she lived.  He started to cross the street but the woman was walking away from him rapidly and the bustle of the traffic meant that within yards she was lost to him.  He searched for a while, but did not see her again and finally convinced himself that it had been a vision conjured up because he was thinking of Boston and Adam.

 

He made his way back into the centre of the city to complete his business with the lawyer and the shipping agents and once that was done returned to his hotel.  The vision of the morning kept coming back to him and after a hurried dinner in the hotel dining room, he spent the evening in his room in pensive mood.  Elizabeth had been his first love and for a time he had believed his only love.  Their time together had been so short and yet the impact she had made on his life so great.  it was she who had encouraged his dream of a piece of land in the west with tall trees to surround the tall sons she was sure they would have.

Well she had been right, but she had not been there to share it with him.  It had been hard to pursue his dream without her and for several years he had wandered aimlessly with their young son, until a second love had come into his life to shake his melancholy from him and to renew the dream.

Inger had been so different from Liz in many ways but she had been the ideal companion for the journey west and she would have made a good wife for a rancher.  He smiled a little, in truth she would have adapted to the hardships of the early days far better than Elizabeth, who had grown up a city girl.  It was Inger who had made him see that his father-in-law had been right when he had told him not to carry a burden, but to keep a warm place in his heart for his first love.  He had done that.  Although, he had built his dream with the help of Inger and later Marie, the place in his heart for Liz had remained special.

 

By the morning, the sadness which had enveloped him the night before had gone and he was looking forward to getting home again.  He did a little shopping, buying presents for the boys and some spices that Hop Sing had particularly asked for, and then he made his way to the river to join the stern wheeler for Sacramento.  He usually enjoyed the river trip, but this time he was restless and anxious to be home.  The longer he was away the more problems he could imagine.  From Sacramento he would take the stage to Virginia City, it was a slow journey but other than on horseback, it was the only way.  There was talk of a railroad to link the Atlantic and Pacific coasts but so far that’s all it was, just talk.  This was one occasion when Ben wished it was built, he wanted to be at home with his sons.

 

As he settled himself aboard the steamer, he took time to survey his fellow passengers, there were several miners returning to their work further up the river, a few families, a couple of business men like himself and a man who looked like a gambler.   Then he saw her.  She wore a dress and coat of  midnight blue and her dark hair was coiled neatly under a very becoming hat.  She was leaning against the rail watching the shore slip away and as the boat moved out into the centre of the river she turned and caught him staring at her.

Ben blushed like a schoolboy ‘I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to stare, but you remind me of someone I once knew.’  he stuttered, well aware that it was a well worn line that sounded false even to his own ears.

The resemblance to Elizabeth was even more remarkable at close quarters, the same colouring, particularly her hair and the shape of her face and her smile.  For she was smiling now.

‘That’s quite alright, but I would like to go below and you are standing in my way.’ she said pleasantly.

Ben stepped aside embarrassed even more, and watched her walk to the companionway and disappear below deck.  For the next few hours the scenery was lost to him, all he could think of was the woman in blue.  They met again at dinner and this time he felt compelled to introduce himself and invite her to join him at his table.

‘Thank you, Mr Cartwright.  It is a little lonely without a travelling companion.’ she smiled as he pulled out a chair for her to sit down. ‘My name is Ruth Walsh and this is my first trip out here from the east.  I’m finding it more daunting than I had expected.’

Ben noted the gold ring on her finger ‘Your husband is not travelling with you?’ he asked.

She shook her head ‘I am a widow, my husband was a sea captain, he  died in an accident off Cape Cod, several years ago.’

‘I’m sorry.’  Ben said the words mechanically, surprised at the relief he felt. ‘I was a sailor myself many years ago, it is hard on those who wait at home.’

Their meal came and they made polite conversation as they ate.  He learned that she was visiting friends and relatives, some in San Francisco and now on to Carson City.  His heart lifted at this news, maybe he would be able to see her after the journey was over.  The intensity of his feelings surprised him and he found himself nervous and tongue tied at times during the evening.

‘I have a ranch just west of Carson City, maybe if your friends don’t mind, I could show you some of the countryside. The Lake is beautiful at anytime, but particularly in the late spring.’  he said hesitantly, worried that she would think this suggestion improper on so short an acquaintance as one evening.

‘That would be lovely.  I am visiting friends of my late husband out of courtesy, I am sure they will be pleased not to have to entertain me for the whole of my stay.  If you’re sure your ranch and family commitments will allow you the time.’

‘I am a widower, my two older sons are capable of managing the ranch without too much supervision from me.  The youngest one is still at school.  So there is nothing that needs my constant presence.’

She smiled at him ‘Then I shall be delighted to take up your kind offer.’

When she smiled the feeling that he was with Liz again became overwhelming.  She seemed to sense that there was something more, but she said nothing.

‘Tell me about your ranch and your sons.  It must be wonderful to have three sons, my husband and I had no children.’  she looked sad as she spoke and Ben felt a strong desire to comfort her.  He reached out and touched her hand, half expecting her to withdraw it, but she simply looked up at him and smiled.

‘You could be bored by the end of the evening, once I start talking about the Ponderosa or the boys, I tend to run on.’

‘I’m sure I won’t be, please tell me all about it.’  she left her hand resting beneath his and he found it reassuring.

‘Adam is my eldest son, he is in charge at the ranch now and I am worried that he will have had problems.  I guess I can’t really believe that he can manage without me, although I know he can.  He’s the scholar of the family, studied in Boston for four years and has only been back with us just under two.’

‘Oh, what did he study?’ she seemed genuinely interested.

‘Architecture and engineering.  Seems strange that he should come back to work the ranch and I feel that some day he will want to go away again. He’s restless and often dissatisfied with the way things are.  Now his younger brother Erik, is a complete opposite.  He is only happy when he is on the ranch, has very little desire to go anywhere else.  I can see him settling down right there, although he is not yet twenty, so he may change but I don’t think so.’  For a moment Ben was lost in thought.

‘And your youngest son, the one you said was still at school?’  she prompted.

‘Joseph, he is just fourteen.  I don’t really know how he will turn out and I suspect neither does he.  He has grand schemes which change from day to day.  He is the one I worry about most.  He has a temper which he can’t quite control and he acts hastily without thought for the consequences.’

Ruth gave him another dazzling smile ‘Weren’t we all a little like that at his age, as we grow older, we grow wiser. You can’t learn from someone else’s mistakes, they have to be your own for the lesson to be of value.’

Ben laughed ‘I suppose you’re right, but I wish Joe would learn from smaller mistakes.’

By the time the meal was over, Ben had described the ranch in detail but had learned little about Ruth Walsh.  For the rest of the journey they sought out each other’s company and a friendship developed to the extent that it was with some sadness Ben left the stagecoach at Virginia City allowing it to carry Ruth on to Carson.  At least he had arranged to meet her in a few days time to give the tour he had promised on their first meeting.

 

He walked up C street thinking about where he would take her on Saturday.  He felt twenty years younger and his mood was light and carefree, so much so that he began to whistle and several people passing turned their heads and smiled, his mood was infectious.  He was about to turn down by the gymnasium in to Taylor on his way to the livery stable, when he chanced to look at his pocket watch, in about five minutes school would be out.  On the spur of the moment he decided to go on a block and meet Joe from school.  They could ride home together.

He reached the corner of C and Washington street just as a group of school children raced out on their way home.  He stood back to allow them to pass and became aware of a group of boys at the back of the Fire house.

‘Hey, I bet Joe can do it.’  he heard one of them shout.

His interest was aroused, do what, he wondered.  He remained at the corner where he could see the boys without being obvious to them and soon spotted his young son in the centre of the group.  He was too far away to see exactly what they were doing, until Joe moved out from the group, by then it was too late.  The metallic clang and the squeak of the weather vane spinning around told its own story.  Joe had indeed won his friend’s bet by hitting the vane with a stone from his catapult.

In an instant the Fire Chief ran out of the building shouting and waving his arms, but the boys had scattered.  Unfortunately, Joe chose the route towards C street and ran straight into his father.

‘Pa!…….’  Never had he been so shocked.  He waited for the explosion, his father must have seen what happened.  It was just his luck, Pa had been away for over a month, why had he come back right now.  Today just wasn’t his day.

In his light hearted mood, Ben could only think of Ruth and he remembered her words, ‘weren’t we all a little like that at his age.’  He could remember doing the same thing, only with him the vane had been on top of a chandler’s store.

Ben caught Joe by the shoulders and his young son feared the worst.  ‘I didn’t see a thing….’  Ben smiled ‘….and I had better not see it ever again, if you know what’s good for you.’

Joe couldn’t believe it, Pa wasn’t angry, he was smiling.

‘I got in from San Francisco about half an hour ago and thought we could ride home together.’

Joe’s mouth had dropped open in shock and he closed it with a snap ‘Sure, Pa.  I’ll go get Cochise.’

Ben nodded ‘I have to get a horse from the livery stable so I’ll meet you back here.’

He continued on down the street, leaving Joe staring after him in disbelief.  When his father turned the corner, Joe shook his head, something had happened to Pa in San Francisco that was for sure.  A few weeks ago such an event would have brought forth at least a ten minute lecture.  But who was he to question it.  He just hoped the mood would hold good after Adam had finished telling him about the fight and reciting his misdemeanours at the supper table tonight.

 

The conversation at supper centred around the timber contract and the extra work it would entail.  There was no discussion of anything else until they were all seated around the fire having coffee.  Once he was comfortable in his own armchair Ben could concentrate on what had been happening at home.  Adam reported on all the work that had been completed but said nothing more.  He had decided that unless he was asked a direct question, he would say nothing about the fight or the picture, which had been successfully repaired.  He felt it only fair that if he said nothing about that, then he shouldn’t mention any of Joe’s behaviour either.  Ben nodded at intervals and asked the occasional question and Joe waited for the inevitable.  Pa always asked Adam whether Joe had behaved himself in his absence, it was routine and the answer was usually the same too.  He didn’t have long to wait.

‘What about these two brothers of yours, have they been giving you plenty of help and not causing you any trouble?’

Both Joe and Hoss held their breath.  Hoss hoping that his older brother would not mention the fight, although he quite expected him to,  and Joe had a whole catalogue he wanted kept quiet.

Adam hesitated just long enough to make them both feel uncomfortable  ‘We got along fine Pa, everything got done.  I’ve no complaints.’  he grinned at Hoss, who had blushed scarlet.  He had answered the question without troubling his conscience too much, he just hoped that his father did not eventually find out the whole truth.

Joe shook his head, something was wrong in this world today.  Twice he had got away without the heavens falling.

Ben didn’t for one moment believe that he was hearing the whole truth, but in his present mood he didn’t intend to question Adam further.  Whatever had happened had been sorted out and everything seemed in order.  His trip to San Francisco had been successful in ways that he had not imagined, in a few days he would be seeing Ruth again and at the moment that thought filled his mind.

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 3

 

 

Next morning Joe was awakened by a tap on his door and Hoss telling him it was time to get up.  He rubbed his eyes for a moment, the room was still dark and as he tentatively put an arm out of the bed it felt cold.  He shivered and retreated back under the blankets, five more minutes wouldn’t hurt, he decided.  He must have drifted off to sleep again for the next sound was the irate voice of his father calling from the bottom of the stairs.

‘Joseph, if you’re not down here doing chores in the next five minutes, you’ll get no breakfast.’

Joe was wide awake now.  He knew this was no idle threat. ‘Coming Pa.’ he called back.  He dressed hurriedly in the half light, not bothering to wash or comb his hair and ran down the stairs with his boots in his hand.

Ben was standing at the bottom of the stairs with his arms folded.

‘About time too.  Didn’t Hoss wake you?’

Joe struggled with his boots, hopping on one foot. ‘I guess so, I must have gone back to sleep.’

Ben shook his head in exasperation, Joe was impossible to get out of bed in the mornings, particularly on school days.  ‘Well, hurry up, you’ve plenty of chores to do before school.’

Joe stamped his feet further into his boots ‘If I gave up school, I could do chores all day.’ he said hopefully.

‘Don’t start that argument again.  You are not giving up school.’

Joe was about to argue the point but his father’s expression stopped him.

‘Outside and get those chores done, or you’ll be late.’

 

The morning was crisp and cold and Joe wished he could have stayed in bed where it was warmer.  He ran across to the barn and was greeted by teasing from his brothers for being so late.

‘We left Cochise for you, everything else is finished.’  Hoss told him.

Adam was leaning against the door post watching Joe work.

‘You could give me a hand if you’ve finished.’  Joe complained.

Adam shook his head ‘You’re doing fine, you might be a little late for school though.’

Joe groaned ‘Oh no.’

Hoss looked up from the tools he had been cleaning ‘What’s wrong? You’re always late.’

Joe shook his head ‘No not that, with Pa coming home and everything I clean forgot, I was going to revise for Math, last night.  We have a test today.’

‘You’ll just have to remember it without revising.’  shrugged Adam, tests never bothered him.

‘If I’d remembered earlier I could have stayed in bed and told Pa I was sick.’ Joe moaned.

Hoss wagged a finger at him ‘Don’t try it, ‘cos believe me if Pa found out you really would be sick.’

Adam laughed ‘There speaks the voice of experience.’  he turned to go into the house ‘Come on Hoss, let’s leave him to it.’

 

Adam was right.  He was late for school, but he managed to slide into his seat at the back of the classroom without too much trouble.   However, his luck did not hold for long.  The Math test was worse than he had feared.  He knew the moment that he turned the paper over and read the first question that he was going to fail it.  It would probably have been alright if he had paid a little attention in class but he couldn’t remember anything.   At the end of the half an hour he had chewed his pencil a lot but it had not been used for much writing.

During the test Miss Jones had wandered around the class looking at the children’s work, now she stood at the front of the class.

‘I think you can mark each others papers.’  she turned to the blackboard and cleaned a section of it.

Joe’s spirits rose, maybe he could persuade Mitch to be generous.

‘Change your papers with your neighbour and then I want some volunteers to work out the problems on the blackboard.’  she paused and looked at the class ‘Now who would like to start with question one.’

Several hands shot up from the front of the class but the boys at the back remained motionless.

Miss Jones smiled ‘How about you Mitchell?’

Mitch looked all around him , he hadn’t volunteered for anything.  Joe froze, obviously Miss Jones’s idea of volunteers was not quite what he had expected.  He watched as Mitch rose slowly to his feet and went to the blackboard.  It took Mitch several minutes but eventually with much prompting and erasing he produced the answer.

‘Well, I would have preferred a speedier response, but at least you got there.  Now…..’ she turned back to the class and appeared to be considering several possibilities ‘Question two….. Joseph.’

Joe’s mind went blank, he passed Mitch who escaped to his desk with relief and gave Joe a sympathetic grin.  Joe took up the chalk but he had no idea where to start, the paper in his hand had a few numbers but none of them made sense.  He started writing what he hoped was a reasonable answer only to hear smothered laughter from behind him.

‘I see that you have no idea how to solve this problem, Joseph.  Are any of your other answers any better?’  Miss Jones said caustically.

Joe shook his head ‘No Ma’am.’

‘Then you had better stay after school to repeat the exercises until you can do this paper.  You may return to your seat.  Mary would you come and show Joseph and Mitchell how these questions should be tackled.’

Joe returned to his desk and gave Mitch a rueful grin.  Being kept after school didn’t worry him provided he got home before Pa noticed.

 

Miss Jones kept him for an hour, which was longer than he had anticipated.  When she eventually let him go, he raced to saddle Cochise and get home.  He was just about to mount up, when Travis Simmons appeared.

‘Hey, Joe…..wait up.’  he called.

Joe stopped and waited for Travis to reach him. ‘I can’t stop Trav, I have to get home, I’m late already.

‘Sure, but can we meet up on Saturday?’  Travis leaned lazily against the schoolhouse.

Joe thought swiftly ‘Yeah, Ok.  I’ll meet you out by the bridge around midday.’

Travis shook his head ‘Naw, come into town.  Meet me by the graveyard.’

Joe shrugged ‘Alright, see you Saturday.’  he climbed aboard Cochise as he spoke and raised a hand to Travis as he set off up the street.

Joe pushed Cochise harder than he should have to get home, he knew that he was going to be late again.  Maybe Pa would still be in the good mood he had shown yesterday.

He made it to the barn in safety, or so he thought.  But his luck couldn’t hold, as he was unsaddling Cochise, his father came into the barn.

‘You’re late, Joseph.’

‘Just a little Pa, but I’ll catch up.’  Joe tried to sound casual, as if there was nothing to explain.

Ben ran his hand over Cochise’s neck and rubbed between her ears, noting that she was still sweating ‘Just how late were you when you left school?’

Joe knew it was no use, Pa wouldn’t give up until he got the whole truth. ‘About an hour, Pa.  Miss Jones kept me late.’  he sighed.

Ben’s expression was one of exasperation ‘What for this time?’

‘I didn’t get the Math test right.’  he said casually.

‘This must be the fourth or fifth time you have been kept after school recently that I know about, and I guess there were other times while I was away, weren’t there?’  Ben frowned.

‘A few.’  Joe admitted reluctantly

Ben fixed Joe with a stern glare ‘There’ll be no more.  If I hear about any more trouble in school, I’ll add to whatever punishment you get in school.  Is that clear.’

Joe nodded ‘Yes, sir.’

Ben walked away to the house, shaking his head as he went.  Telling Joe not to get into trouble, was like telling it not to snow in winter.  It was bound to happen you just didn’t know exactly when.

 

Saturdays were Joe’s favourite day, a few chores and he would be free for the rest of the day until supper time.  Sundays could be good too, but dressing up for church tended to spoil them and his father usually expected the day to be one the family spent together.  This particular Saturday dawned sunny and warm, which after the cold snap gave a promise of the hot summer to come.  Joe skipped through his chores in record time and before anyone could stop him, saddled up Cochise and headed for town.

His father too, had rushed through his work.  He wanted to get away early to Carson City so that he would have plenty of time to show Ruth some of the beauties of the countryside.  It was still only mid morning when he emerged from the house dressed in a smart suit and white shirt, his boots highly polished, he felt nervous as though he was on his first date.  He harnessed Sandy to the buggy and was just about to leave when Adam and Hoss rode back into the yard.  They had been to the sawmill to check on the timber being cut for the contract he had negotiated and were surprised to see him dressed in his best clothes.

‘Going somewhere special, Pa?’ Adam asked as he dismounted and threw Sport’s reins over the rail.

Ben gave an embarrassed grunt ‘Just over to Carson City to visit a friend.’  he muttered, he had hoped to get away without being seen, leaving Hop Sing to tell the boys where he had gone and pass on his instructions.

Adam glanced at Hoss and raised his eyebrows ‘Will you be back for supper?’ he queried hoping to learn more.

Ben shook his head ‘Probably not.  Joe has gone into town, he’ll be back by supper and I want one of you to stay here with him tonight, in case I’m late back.’

Adam sighed ‘But Pa, we were going into town, there’s a dance.’

‘Well, I’m sorry, but Hop Sing is going out and I don’t want Joe here alone.’ so you decide between you who stays.’

‘Surely Joe doesn’t need a babysitter.’  Adam tried again.

Ben’s patience was wearing thin, he wished he had got away earlier ‘You and Joe may not think so, but I do.  One of you will stay here, is that understood.’

Adam nodded ‘Yes, Pa.  If you say so.’  he raised his eyes heavenwards, aggravating his father still further.

He glared at his eldest son ‘I may be late back, so I will see you in the morning.’

Adam watched the buggy until it turned the corner and then swore under his breath.  He looked at his brother with a resigned expression ‘I’ll toss you for who stays.’ he sighed.

Hoss grinned ‘You go, I ain’t much for dancing and I know Katie Watson and Jenny Howard want to fight over you.’

Adam looked relieved and then guilty ‘Are you sure you don’t mind?’

‘As long as you help with the chores before you go. I guess I can manage.  You’ll just owe me another favour sometime.’  Hoss replied.

 

Joe arrived back just before supper and well after the chores were finished, he seemed agitated and ill at ease, but Adam was rushing to go out and didn’t pay much attention to him.  Once he had gone, Hoss settled down in an armchair and suggested a game of chequers.

Joe shook his head ‘You could have gone with Adam, I’m not a baby.’ he said crossly.

Hoss shrugged ‘That’s what Adam told Pa, but he wouldn’t buy it, so I guess you’ve got me.  How about a game?’

‘I don’t feel like playing chequers.’

‘Ok, cards then?’  Hoss tried again.

‘I told you I don’t feel like it.  Why can’t you just leave me alone?’  Joe snapped.

‘Sorry, I just thought…….’

‘Well don’t.’  Joe shouted and ran up the stairs to his room, slamming the door behind him.

Hoss watched him go with a hurt expression on his face, it wasn’t often that he and Joe fell out and he didn’t even know why Joe was snapping at him.  He contemplated going after him, but decided that his little brother was probably better left alone when he was in this sort of mood.  He settled down with the newspaper to wait for his father and Adam to return.

Around about eleven o’clock, Hoss decided that neither Pa nor Adam were in a hurry to get home and he might as well go to bed.  He gathered himself a snack from the kitchen, having first made sure that Hop Sing had retired for the night and made his way upstairs.  As he passed Joe’s room he decided to check on his little brother and he quietly opened the door and peeped in.  In the half light he could see a hump in the bed and a dark head on the pillow.  Having reassured himself that Joe was asleep, he went to his own room.

Just before he fell asleep, Hoss was vaguely aware of someone coming up the staircase and his door opening and then closing softly, the footsteps faded along the landing and  he heard his father’s door close just as the grandfather clock chimed midnight.  He was sure that Adam was still out and he wondered if his father had checked in his room too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 4

 

 

Ben’s drive to Carson City was a pleasant one.  The midday sunshine was warm and there was a light breeze, the ideal day for showing off the Ponderosa to his companion, he decided.  He had arranged to meet Ruth at a small restaurant that he often frequented, where he knew the food was good and the atmosphere pleasant.  He had been a little surprised that she had resisted his attempts to collect her from her friends’ home.  He supposed it was a reluctance to introduce him to friends of her late husband.  He knew quite a lot of people in Carson City but the Tollivers were not among them.

His impatience to see Ruth again meant that he arrived at the restaurant well before the appointed time and the resulting wait made him anxious and ill at ease.  Ruth on the other hand arrived slightly late, looking calm and serene, she was dressed in a shade of pink that accentuated the dark hair curled around another pretty hat.  He felt himself blush as he rose to greet her and held her chair as she sat down at the corner table.

At first the conversation was slow and stilted, neither knew enough about the other to risk anything more than comments on the weather and the city.  She allowed him to order for them both and when the meal came it eased the tension.  Gradually Ben relaxed as he steered the conversation around to the beauties of the Ponderosa and the drive he planned they would take after lunch.

‘It all sounds so beautiful, I’m afraid I was too tired the other evening to take in the scenery from the coach.’  Ruth explained.

‘Well, we will only have time to see just a small part of it in one afternoon.  It is too far to drive to the lake and back, but I thought we could take the buggy through the valley.’

‘Are you sure its too far, I really would like to see the lake. You have made it sound so spectacular.’  Ruth’s voice was pleading.

He couldn’t resist her plea or her smile, it was so familiar to him.  He had travelled back in time. He had never been able to deny Liz anything and Ruth was having the same effect on him.

‘I suppose if we left now, we could probably drive close enough to see the lake from above Kings Canyon.’  He said doubtfully.

Ruth was already getting to her feet and he had to move swiftly to assist her with her chair before paying the check and following her into the street.  He helped her into the buggy and walked around to take the reins beside her.  The restaurant had been crowded, and although they had been seated apart from the other diners it was somehow different being alone with her in the buggy, he was very aware of their closeness.   His nervousness returned and he drove for several minutes without speaking.

Slowly as his confidence grew he began to point out some of the land marks and the more he showed off his land the more  animated he became.  They drove across the valley, where the grass renewed by the winter snows and dotted with spring flowers spread out like a soft carpet on either side of the road. He stopped briefly to rest the horse before starting the slow climb through the foothills towards Lake Marlette.  At last they reached a point where he could show her the view down to Marlette and Lake Tahoe beyond.

He helped her down from the buggy and as he touched her hand he felt a strong desire to hold her close to him.

‘It’s as beautiful as you said it was.’ she said softly.

He stood slightly behind her and as he pointed out the north shore of the lake, his arm came to rest around her shoulders.  He quite expected her to move away, but she seemed to lean closer to him and he could feel the soft touch of her hair against his cheek.

‘The Ponderosa is putting on its best spring dress for you.’ he smiled.

She turned towards him ‘You mean this is your land?’

He nodded ‘As far as you can see to the north , south and east and down to the shores of the lake.  He placed his hands on her shoulders and turned her gently so that he could point to the north east.

‘See that mountain with a little snow still at the summit.’  he said.

Ruth nodded and glanced up at him.

‘That’s Slide mountain.  Just below it, to the east is Lake Washoe and the ranch house is between the two.   Virginia City is over those mountains to the east.’  again he pointed out the direction for her.  He pointed west again, that mountain higher than all the rest is Mount Tallac, the snow almost never leaves the summit even in summer.

For more than an hour they admired the view and talked.  Ben wished the afternoon could go on forever and he was sure that Ruth shared his feelings.  He felt a tenderness between them, where even the silences were  a shared experience.  As the afternoon wore on a cool breeze began to blow and Ben knew that they would have to start back if they were to make the City before dark.  He helped Ruth back into the buggy and began to turn it back towards the valley.

‘Just one last look, Ben.  I want to hold this afternoon in my memory. It has been so pleasant.’  she said quietly.

He paused for a second, then as she turned her face toward him, he kissed her gently on the cheek ‘For me too.’  he whispered.

 

They drove back in companionable silence, and by the time they arrived on the outskirts of the city, Ruth’s head was resting on his shoulder.  As they approached the busy main street, Ruth moved away from him and he reluctantly accepted that she was right to not to allow the intimacy they had shared to be a public display of affection.

‘Will you let me take you to dinner?’  he asked when he had negotiated the traffic to stop outside the same restaurant where they had eaten lunch.

For a second she looked flustered ‘Why yes….. I’d like that.’  she replied.  ‘But I will need to change and let my friends know my plans.’

‘Where do your friends live?  I can take you there now and collect you in about an hour if  that’s convenient.’

Again she hesitated ‘If you could just take me to the corner of Division street it isn’t far from there.  Then you won’t have to turn the buggy around.  I can meet you back here in an hour, it will be easier.’  she explained.

Ben looked worried ‘Are you sure?  It is no trouble to take you to the door.’

‘No, I’d prefer to walk, really.’

Suddenly, she seemed nervous and unsure of herself and he wondered why she was so anxious that he should not meet the Tollivers.  He did not feel that it was right to question her and he reluctantly agreed to her suggested arrangements.

 

He took the horse and buggy to the livery stable and arranged for Sandy to be taken care of until he needed to return home.  The remainder of the hour he spent getting himself a beer and mulling over the events of the afternoon.  He did not recognise anyone in the saloon and sat alone at a corner table lost in thought.  He was vaguely aware that the gambler at the next table was familiar to him, but he could not place where he had last seen him.  He formulated several conversations in his head, in each of which he asked Ruth to visit the ranch, but none seemed to be suitable on such a short acquaintance.  He knew he wanted to see more of her, but the distance to Carson City made frequent visits difficult.  He was relieved when the hour was up and he could make his way to the restaurant.

This time Ruth was there ahead of him, and he apologised for keeping her waiting as they were led to a table.   Conversation was easier than it had been at lunch and Ruth told him a little of her life on the east coast.  He learned that they shared a common home state, in that she and her husband had lived for most of their married life in New Bedford, less than fifty miles from his Boston birthplace.  They discussed New England and the things they both loved about the sea.  The more they talked, the more Ben could see similarities with Elizabeth and the more the two personalities merged in his mind.

Once again Ruth was hesitant when he took her arm to escort her back to her lodgings but this time he was adamant.

‘You cannot walk back alone.  It wouldn’t be safe for you, Carson City may seem civilised in daylight but believe me it has a long way to go before it catches up with eastern cities.’  he told her.

She laughed lightly ‘You forget, I was married to a sailor.  The tales he told of the Boston or New Bedford waterfront would make this seem like a  Sunday school.’

Ben grinned ‘Yes, I can recall some pretty uncivilised incidents myself.’

She smiled up at him ‘And I bet you were involved in more than a few of those ‘incidents’ yourself.’

‘Maybe, but don’t you let on to my sons, I have enough trouble keeping them in line…..’  his voice trailed away, realising that the statement implied that he would see her again.

She took her cue from his embarrassed silence ‘I’d love to meet them.’  she said simply.

He recovered  quickly ‘Then we shall have to arrange it.  How long are you staying in Carson City?’  he realised that he was almost holding his breath as he waited for her answer.

‘I think I have already overstayed my welcome with the Tollivers.’

His heart sank, she couldn’t mean that she was going away so soon.  Her next words put the world right again.

‘I thought I might move into a hotel, maybe in Virginia City.  I would so like to see more of the mountains and the Lake of course.’  she glanced at him to judge his reaction.

He hesitated then said what was on his mind ‘I’d rather hoped you might want to see me again too.’

She gave him her most dazzling smile ‘Well, I shall need an escort for all this sight seeing. As you pointed out to me, it’s not safe for me to wander about alone.’

They had reached the end of Division Street and Ruth pointed to a house not far from the corner.

‘That’s the Tollivers.’

They stopped at the white painted gate and he held her hands in his ‘When can I see you again?’ his heart was beating faster than normal as he waited for her response.

‘I’ll arrange to travel to Virginia City on Monday and take a room at the International House.’  she replied.

‘I could collect you myself.’

She shook her head ‘You have a ranch to run, I couldn’t impose on you.  Let me settle in to the hotel and then you can show me the rest of your Ponderosa.’

‘It really would be no trouble…….’

She held her finger to his lips ‘Please…. I insist that I make my own travel arrangements.  I’m a very determined lady.’

He understood.  She was quietly telling him that he was rushing things too much. He took her hand and kissed it ‘Very well, but I will call for you on Tuesday morning and keep my promise to show you the ranch.’

‘Thank you for a lovely day.  I can’t remember when I have enjoyed a day so much.’  she said softly as she reached for the latch on the gate.

Despite knowing that it was too soon,  he could not let her go so easily.  He reached out and touched her shoulder and as she turned towards him, he took her in his arms and kissed her gently.  ‘Neither can I.’

‘Goodnight, Ben and thank you.’  she walked quickly up the path and turned to look at him as she opened the door.

The loving look and the touch of her lips on his, stayed with him for his journey home.

 

Checking on the boys before he went to bed was something he often did, but tonight it had a special significance for him.  Each one represented a love and a tragedy in his life, seeing Ruth and realising that he was falling in love with her had heightened his sense of loss.

Joe s door was slightly ajar and he peeped in, the blankets were in disarray and his youngest son seemed restless.  He softly approached the bed and re-arranged the covers, tucking him in gently.  He knew that if Joe woke he would be cross at being treated like a baby, so he resisted the temptation to brush the hair from his eyes.  He contented himself with gazing down at his son remembering the time he had spent with Marie, here at the ranch.

Hoss s door was closed but he opened it quietly and seeing that his middle son appeared to be sound  asleep, he closed it just as softly.

Adam s room was next to his own and the door was firmly closed.  He debated whether to open it, or to knock, it was hard to accept that his eldest son was now grown and checking on him was probably not only unnecessary but also likely to lead to resentment.  However, his evening with Ruth had reminded him so much of Liz that he couldn t resist the urge to check.  He opened the door, the room as usual was immaculate and the light from the hallway fell on the empty bed.  He smiled to himself, so Adam had got his own way and gone into town, no doubt Hoss had given in easily.

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 5

 

 

Church on Sunday was always a chore to Joe, he didn’t mind singing hymns but he found sermons boring and the Reverend Miles always preached long sermons.  He was seated between Hoss and Adam and wondered if his father would notice if he closed his eyes.  He fidgeted in his seat and got a glare from his eldest brother.  He glanced around the church and his eyes met those of Henry Morton the owner of the general store on C street.  Joe felt as though he was being closely watched and it made him very uncomfortable.  The colour rose in his cheeks and he looked down at his hands.  For a moment he concentrated on the preacher’s words.   Each Sunday recently, Reverend Miles had taken one of the ten commandments as his text and it seemed to Joe that his choice this week had been made with him in mind.  The more the preacher spoke of sin, the more guilty Joe felt, he glanced at his father hoping that he couldn’t read his mind.  Pa had an uncanny way of knowing when he had done something wrong and once he started questioning Joe knew the truth wouldn’t stay hidden for long.  On this occasion the consequences of discovery would be worse than anything he had faced before.

No one was more relieved than Joe Cartwright, when at last the service was over.  He followed his father and brothers out into the warm May sunshine and walked with Hoss to where the horses were tied.  His heart missed a beat when he turned and saw that his father had stopped to talk to Sheriff Coffee and Mr Morton, he tried to lip read their conversation but it was too difficult.  They stopped talking and his father walked over towards the horses, Joe held his breath, but Ben was smiling and talking to Adam and appeared to be in a very good humour.

‘I thought we could get Hop Sing to make up a picnic and take it up to the Lake.  Its been a long time since it was warm enough to do that.’  he was saying.

Adam looked a little put out ‘I was hoping to stay in town this afternoon, Pa.’

‘You were in town last night, surely you could spend some time with your brothers today.’

Adam gave a wry grin, his father had a habit of making him feel guilty without cause.  Obviously he had checked up on him last night, since neither he nor Hoss and said anything about who had stayed home.  At least he couldn’t have been heard arriving home, or he would have been on the receiving end of a lecture.  It had been the early hours of the morning when he went to bed.  He didn’t want his father to pursue the conversation concerning his visit to town and decided that it might be wisest to forego his plans this time.

‘Sure, maybe we can get in some fishing.’  he agreed.

‘What do you two think of the idea.’  Ben addressed his younger sons.

Hoss nodded ‘I’ll talk to Hop Sing about that picnic, he had fried chicken last night, maybe there is some left.’

‘I doubt it.  I bet you raided the kitchen before you went to bed.’ Adam said.

Hoss looked suitably guilty and Adam laughed.

‘Joe…’ Ben tried to attract the attention of his youngest son, who was lost in thought.

Joe looked up startled ‘Sorry Pa, I didn’t hear you.’

Ben smiled ‘I asked if you thought a picnic and some fishing was a good idea.’ he repeated.

Joe nodded distractedly ‘If you like.’  he continued to toy with the reins as he spoke, anxious to leave town as soon as possible.

As they rode home Ben dropped back behind Hoss and Joe to talk to Adam.

‘What’s wrong with Joe.  He hardly touched his breakfast and he’s definitely not his usual cheeky self today.’

Adam shrugged ‘I hadn’t noticed.  Nothing wrong as far as I know.’

‘Did he get back in time to do his chores last night?’

Adam hesitated, then decided that a small lie wouldn t hurt.  ‘Yes, he seemed Ok, a bit quiet maybe but that’s all.’  Adam was puzzled, he hadn’t paid much attention to his little brother yesterday, so it was difficult to answer.  ‘Maybe Hoss knows.’

 

Ben didn’t have a chance to speak to Hoss until they were beside the lake.  They had eaten the picnic, including Hop Sing’s fried chicken which had been freshly cooked especially for Hoss.  Adam was lost in a book as usual, his fishing pole lying untouched at his side.  Joe had gone to the water’s edge and was idly skimming stones across the lake surface.

Ben waited until he was sure that Joe couldn’t hear and then he spoke softly to Hoss.

‘Do you know what’s bothering Joe?’  he asked.

‘Nothing that he wants to tell me about.’ Hoss said a little disgruntled.  ‘He almost bit my head off last night and when I tried to talk to him this morning he just walked away.  But something is sure worrying him.’  he stopped and gave his father a searching look, unsure whether to say any more.  After a moment’s hesitation he added ‘He didn’t sleep too well, I heard him moving about in the middle of the night.’

Ben got to his feet ‘I think I’ll suggest a walk, he might tell me something.’

He strolled down to the shoreline and picked up a flat stone which he sent skipping across the water.

‘Not bad, I used to do better when I was your age.’  he put his arm around Joe’s shoulders ‘How about going for a walk along the shore with me.’  He felt Joe freeze at his touch. Something was very wrong, but what?

Joe realised that it wasn’t really a request and although he nodded and complied with the words, he moved out away from his father’s embrace.  They walked in silence for a few moments and Joe felt sure his father must know of his guilt.

‘Do you want to tell me about it, son?’  Ben broke the silence with a softly spoken question.

Joe feigned ignorance ‘About what, Pa?’

Ben stopped walking and Joe did the same. For a moment Joe held his father’s gaze then he quickly looked away toward the far shore

‘Whatever is bothering you.’

‘Nothing’s bothering me. I’m fine.’  Joe continue walking and Ben was forced to follow.

‘You have hardly spoken all day, you didn’t eat much at breakfast or lunch and Hoss tells me you were upset last night.  Hardly sounds as though you’re fine to me.’

Joe immediately reacted angrily, covering his guilty feelings with indignation ‘Just ‘cos I didn’t want to play chequers with him, he tells tales.’  he snapped.

‘He wasn’t telling tales.  I asked him and he was worried about you.’  Ben said patiently.

‘Well, he doesn’t have to be. I’m Ok.’  Joe responded.

Ben realised that in this mood, Joe could stall for hours. He would get nowhere unless he took a stronger line and that he didn’t want to do, until he had a better idea of the problem.

He sighed ‘Alright Joe, if you don’t want to tell me, I guess you’ll just have to work it out for yourself.  Remember your brothers and I are here if you need us.’

He reluctantly walked back to where Hoss was sitting with his fishing pole and silently shook his head at Hoss’s questioning glance.

 

Joe walked on along the soft sand, occasionally kicking at a pebble, until he found a boulder set back from the shore where he could sit and not be seen by the others.  He needed to talk to someone, but there was no one in whom he could confide.  It was rare for him to have a problem that he couldn’t tell either his father or his brothers about.  If he was in trouble, Hoss or Adam would usually look after him or cover up for him, but he knew that this time, if he told them, they would go straight to Pa.  The only good thing so far, appeared to be that no one except Travis and his friends knew of his guilt.  Maybe he could keep the secret and his father need never know.  He decided that this was his only option and with his mind firmly made up, he walked back to where Hoss and Adam were now fishing.

 

Ben had originally planned that the picnic would be a good time to tell the boys about Ruth, but the way it had developed left him uncertain.  Adam had not wanted to come, and as a result his participation had been minimal, and Joe was in a different world where at the moment Ben could not reach him.  He sat on the sand with his hands clasped around his knees and studied each son in turn.  Since he had returned from San Francisco, there seemed to be tensions between them which he had not noticed before, even Hoss seemed to have lost his easy going relationship with his brothers.  They were after all half brothers, maybe as they left childhood behind, they were growing apart or was he just more aware of the differences because of his new found friendship with Ruth.  Whatever the reason he decided to leave his announcement of her visit until supper.

 

The differences surfaced again later when evening chores were being done.  Ben was in the house talking to Hop Sing about a special supper for Tuesday and did not see the start of the problem.

Adam had not enjoyed his time at the lake.  He had endured it, while all the time thinking that he could have had a better afternoon with his friends, particularly Katie. His mind was on Katie now, and he was contemplating what his father’s reaction would be if he went into town tonight.  He guessed that if he went without mentioning it in advance, his father would be furious, but if he asked, the likely answer would be no.  He was so deep in thought that he was only half heartedly working on the stalls and he looked around guiltily to see if Hoss had noticed.

His brother was talking softly to Chub and not doing any work at all.  He looked for Joe and discovered that he was standing in the middle of the barn with a water bucket in his hand gazing off into the distance.  In his present mood, he decided that attack was the best defence for his own inaction and he spoke sharply.

‘Joe…. stop moping around and get some work done.’ he yelled ‘You too Hoss, I can’t do everything.’

Hoss had already finished most of his chores and Adam’s accusation was totally unjustified.  He came out of Chub’s stall and faced his older brother full of righteous indignation.

‘Don’t yell at me.  You’re the one who’s done nothing.’  he hesitated a second ‘Pa’s back now so you can stop playing at being the boss.  I don’t have to take orders from you.’

Adam knew his brother was right, but he had no intention of admitting it ‘I’m older than you, and you will do as I say.’  he shouted, sounding more like a ten year old than an adult.

Hoss did not back down either ‘You gonna make me?’ he replied moving a step closer to his brother.

Joe watched fascinated.  It was the sort of exchange that in boys of his age would almost certainly lead to a fight.  He found it amusing that his older brothers were bickering again, so soon after their last fight and over the same issue, particularly as once again he should have been the one in the firing line.  He moved to one side to watch and as he did so he caught a glimpse of the porch.  He debated whether he should mention that Pa was on his way across the yard, but decided that it might take the attention away from him, if someone else was in trouble.

Hoss gave his older brother a push and Adam stepped backward but reached out to retaliate. It was a slow move because he was off balance and Hoss easily caught his wrist and held it.  He was about to apply pressure when the sound of Ben’s voice stopped him.

‘What’s going on here?’  he asked quietly.

Hoss dropped his brother’s hand as if he had been scalded and looked up startled.

Adam shrugged ‘Nothin’ we’re just fooling around.’

Ben looked from one to the other, not believing Adam’s words for one moment.

‘It looks to me as though you’d be better getting the work done first.’  he said sharply.

He gave each one of them a searching look and frowned ‘Supper is almost ready and I want to see the chores finished before you eat.  Is that understood?’  this time his glance included Joe, who picked up the bucket he had dropped and went out to the trough to fill it.

Both Adam and Hoss nodded and went back to their respective work.  Ben watched for a moment then turned on his heel and went back to the house, shaking his head.

 

The atmosphere at supper was strained and although Ben did his best to start conversation it generally fell flat.  Once the meal was finished and Hop Sing had cleared away the crockery, Ben moved to his favourite chair with a full cup of coffee.  Hoss seated himself on the sofa and hid behind the paper, while Joe tried to read it over his brother’s shoulder and got an angry look for his trouble.   Ben watched as Adam paced the room, obviously wanting to go somewhere.  This couldn’t go on, he had to try to get them all talking to each other again.

‘Alright, since none of you want to talk, you can sit and listen to me.’ he spoke quietly but firmly.  ‘You two sit down.’  he indicated Joe and Adam ‘and Hoss put that paper down and listen.’

Adam sighed and lowered himself into a chair, obviously asking to go to town was not a good idea, he could feel a lecture about to begin.  Joe perched himself on the arm of the sofa and then slid down on to it when his father gave him one of his stern looks.

‘I don’t know what’s got into the three of you  since I got back from San Francisco.  You’ve done nothing but bicker.  Now if you have something to say, I want to hear it.  Otherwise you will start treating each other with some respect.’  he paused and looked at each one in turn.

Adam met his gaze with a look which while not insolent, had a suggestion of indifference and boredom.  Hoss looked slightly guilty, but then when his father was angry, he usually had that expression even when innocent.  Joe looked away as soon as his father caught his eye and the colour rose in his cheeks.

‘Well, Adam, as the eldest maybe you would like to explain your behaviour first.’  Ben glared at him until Adam too, had to look away.

He shrugged his shoulders in typical fashion and cleared his throat ‘I guess we’re just tired, its been a long winter.’

‘And that’s an excuse for constantly arguing with each other is it?  What about you Hoss?’

Hoss blushed a deep red ‘Yeah, it’s like Adam says.’  he hesitated ‘and I guess I don’t like him telling me what to do all the time.’

Adam snorted in derision ‘You never do it anyway.’

‘That’s enough.’ Ben did not raise his voice, but the look he gave his eldest son made him look down at his feet.

‘I’m sorry.’  he said quietly.

‘And what about you Joseph, why have you been so bad tempered.’

Joe avoided looking up and muttered ‘Same as Hoss I guess, Adam’s too bossy.’

‘Fine, now you’ve all had a chance to have your say.  It’s my turn.’  he took a sip of his coffee and regarded them all for a moment in silence. ‘First of all, when I am away, Adam is in charge.  That means you obey him, just as you would me, if I were here.  No ifs or buts and no complaints.  Is that understood?’

Hoss and Joe both muttered ‘Yes, sir.’ but Hoss glared at Adam as he spoke.  Luckily for him, his father was concentrating on his coffee at that moment.

‘Being responsible for the ranch and for younger brothers is a lot to ask.  It’s hard work and some decisions aren’t always easy to make.  You do not make it any easier for him, by questioning his instructions.’

Adam smiled he had not expected his father to be quite so supportive, nor to come down quite so heavily on his younger brothers.  Ben saw the smile and guessed its reason.

‘If I think your complaint is justified then I will talk to Adam, you do not start fights to prove your case.  If there are any more fights or arguments, then the person starting it will find himself confined to the ranch.’ he waited for this message to sink in before continuing ‘I was hoping that we would spend a pleasant Sunday as a family, but it hasn’t turned out quite the way I planned.’

Adam bit his lip and kept his eyes on the floor. He knew from his father’s tone that he did think the complaint justified and that a lecture would almost certainly follow when they were alone.

Ben took a deep breath, he had to tell them sometime and it didn’t look as though the atmosphere would improve much before Tuesday.

‘Now I want to see an improvement from all of you.  I have invited a friend to supper on Tuesday.’ he said bluntly  ‘Her name is Mrs Walsh, I got to know her on my way back from San Francisco and I would like you to meet her. She comes from New England and she is visiting friends in Carson City.  I want you to make her welcome and to be on your best behaviour.  Please don’t let me down.’

Adam gave a half smile.  He noted the way his father had hurried his words and the clipped tones, not to mention the high colour in his cheeks.  So this Mrs Walsh must be important to him, presumably that is where he had gone visiting yesterday.

Hoss and Joe simply nodded and then returned to the newspaper, both trying to read it at the same time.  Adam’s knowing smile had not been lost on his father and Ben was tempted to make some comment, but he decided that this introduction was going to be difficult enough without antagonising Adam from the start.  Just for a moment he wished that Ruth did not look quite so much like Elizabeth, it was going to make it that much harder for his eldest son to accept her.

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 6

 

 

‘Joe….Joe’  Adam’s voice floated up the stairs ‘Where are you?’

Joe ignored the shout, he was stretched out on his bed, his hands behind his head and a schoolbook open over his face.  He was supposed to learning a piece of poetry for homework, but it bored him and he had given up.  What could Adam want now, he was sure he had done all his chores and it couldn’t be supper time yet.  He was feeling fairly relaxed, school hadn’t been too bad so far this week, no one seemed to know about what he had done and he hadn’t seen Travis.  If Adam would just stay off his back, things would be good.

His door was flung open and Adam stormed in ‘Why don’t you answer?’ he said angrily.

Joe tossed the book aside and it fell to the floor ‘ Why don’t you knock?’ he replied just as angrily.

Adam bent to retrieve the book and examined the slightly broken spine ‘And take care of my books, they cost money.’

Joe got to his feet and grabbed the book from his brother’s hand ‘It’s not your book.  Pa may have bought it for you once, but he gave it to me.  It was torn when I got it, all I ever get is third hand.’  he placed the book on the desk and sighed ‘What do you want, anyway?’

‘Have you forgotten that you have to wash and change for supper, Pa is bringing a guest?’  Adam said exasperated at Joe’s attitude. ‘I’m not taking the grief if you aren’t clean and tidy.’

Joe grinned ‘I thought Pa told you not to be so bossy.’  he said slyly.

‘Who told you that?  Anyway that’s not what he said.’  Adam was defensive.

Joe gave his brother a knowing smile  ‘Sounded like it to me and I’m an expert on Pa’s lectures.’

‘You mean you were eavesdropping.  One day Pa is going to catch you at that.’

‘Yeah…., well yesterday wasn’t the day.’  Joe was pleased to be one up on his older brother for once.

‘Just get washed and changed into something decent.’  he viewed Joe’s grubby school clothes with disgust. ‘I have a feeling this visitor is kind of important to Pa.’

‘Yeah, I got the same feeling.’  said Hoss from the doorway.   ‘Hey, Adam do you think Pa’s courting her.’

Adam laughed ‘It sure sounded like it and he did get all dressed up on Saturday.’

‘He was late back too.’  Hoss added.

Joe shrugged ‘So what?’

Adam nudged Hoss ‘Well, as an expert on stepmothers, I ‘d say you’ll have to wash behind your ears more often and stop bringing snakes into the house for a start.’

Joe looked horrified ‘You don’t mean he’s going to marry her?  We haven’t even met her yet.’

Adam kept his grin ‘We’d never met your mother.  They were already married when Pa brought her here.  Isn’t that right Hoss?’

Joe looked puzzled ‘But that was different.’

‘Not to us, it wasn’t.’  Hoss joined in the teasing.  ‘You’ll have to tidy up this mess too!’ he waved his hand around Joe’s room.

Joe shrugged ‘I won’t have to do what she says anyway, even if Pa does marry her.’

Adam put his arm around Hoss’s shoulder and they both solemnly shook their heads ‘That’s what we said didn’t we Hoss.’

They turned and left the room shaking with laughter at Joe’s obvious dislike of the idea.

Once out in the hallway, Hoss turned to Adam with a more sober face ‘Do you really think it’s that serious?

Adam shrugged ‘How should I know, but we had better get cleaned up and be on our best behaviour, just in case.  I was on the receiving end of Pa’s temper when I upset Marie, I’d kinda like to get off on the right foot this time.’  he gave his brother an affectionate pat on the back ‘Don’t look so glum, we may be worrying about nothing.’

 

Ben had been worrying all day.  He had left mid morning and had reminded Adam about the visit before he left.  He had checked with Hop Sing to make sure everything was in order for supper, what more could he do?

He found Ruth safely ensconced at the International House and they had met for lunch in the hotel dining room.  This time they had been more relaxed and Ruth had chatted easily about her life in Massachusetts with her husband.  She seemed more reticent about her early life, saying nothing except that her parents were dead and Ben did not press her on the subject.  In the afternoon, he suggested that they drive around to the north end of the Ponderosa so that he could show her more of the lake, this time from above the ranch house.

‘Is there anything more beautiful?’  Ruth sighed as they paused long enough to look down on the lake from above Crystal Bay.

‘Nothing that I’ve seen, except maybe the other end of the lake or some of the waterfalls in spring.’  Ben agreed.

‘I can understand, why you chose to stay here.’

‘It can be harsh in winter, but I love it even then.  The first few years were hard, we had few neighbours and I know the boys were lonely for a time.  But once the wagon trains started to move through and then the silver was discovered, it all changed.  Now Virginia City is one of the fastest growing cities in the country and one of the richest.’

‘How long ago did that happen?’

Ben considered ‘Well, there have been prospectors around for some time but I suppose the real strike must have been around three or four years ago and now they are talking about statehood for Nevada.  It all seems to have changed overnight.’

Ruth looked up at him and gently touched his cheek ‘You’re not sure you like it changing are you?’  she said perceptively.

He smiled and took her hands in his ‘Oh, everything changes, I guess I’m just getting too old to adapt as quickly as I used to.  I find the bustle of Virginia City tiring at times.’

‘You are not old.  I still can’t believe that you have grown up sons.’

‘I love the flattery, but you will get to meet them shortly and I can assure you that Adam is very grown up and the other two think they are.’

The mention of his sons, brought all the anxieties back. They seemed to have taken notice of his talk on Sunday but who could tell?  It had been such a wonderful day, and as each moment passed he felt closer to Ruth, but tonight’s meal could spoil all that.  Ruth too was becoming more nervous the nearer they go to the house.

‘I hope your sons don’t mind me intruding on your family meal.’

‘They will love having you, particularly Adam, he enjoys having someone to talk books to, and will want to know all about your travels.’  Ben spoke with more confidence than he felt.  Maybe Adam wouldn’t notice the resemblance to Liz or maybe he should have told him.

‘There’s the house just below us.’  Ben pointed away to his right.

‘Didn’t you say you built it yourself.’ she said amazed.

‘I had some help, and Adam designed most of it. We have added the kitchen and bunkhouse since the original was built.’

She looked at him thoughtfully ‘Your wife must have loved it.’

Ben smiled a little sadly ‘A lot of the ideas were hers, I think it was the house that brought her and Adam together in the end.  It wasn’t easy for him accepting a second stepmother at twelve.’

‘I would think that it is difficult at any age.  How old were the boys when she died.’  she stopped and looked at him anxiously and saw the pain in his eyes ‘I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked. I didn’t mean to bring up painful memories.’

He reached over and took her hand ‘It’s alright, I want to talk to you about my family.  Joe was five, Hoss eleven and Adam was seventeen, just planning to go away to college.  That was delayed because he couldn’t cope with leaving home at the time and because I needed him.  It seems it is always Adam that has the tough times.’

The buggy swung into the yard and Ben pulled up in front of the porch.  Immediately, he jumped down and walked around to assist Ruth.  He heard rather than saw the door open and knew that all three boys were standing on the porch.

He held Ruth’s arm and led her forward to introduce her.  He was pleased to see that all three of his sons were smartly dressed and even Hoss was wearing a tie, something he hated.

‘Boys, this is Mrs Walsh.   Ruth these are my sons.  This is Adam.’

Adam’s face had shown surprise and disbelief at first, but Ben had been looking at Ruth and by the time he looked back, a mask had descended, hiding his feelings.

Adam held out his hand ‘How do you do, Ma’am.’  he said formally.  His voice betraying no emotion.

‘This is Erik.’  Hoss accepted the outstretched hand and nodded, embarrassed at the use of his given name.

‘And this is Joseph.’  Joe shook hands but said nothing, he was too busy deciding whether this stranger might became a problem.

Ruth smiled at all three ‘I’m so pleased to meet you, your father has told me so much about you.’  she tried to appear relaxed but inside she was in turmoil, the opinion of these three young men could determine her future and it was vital that they approve.

‘Shall we go inside, I expect Hop Sing has supper ready.’  Ben took Ruth’s arm and led the way.

The boys followed and Adam raised his eyebrows at Hoss, but his brother was not aware of the significance of the gesture.  Once inside the house, Ben made sure that Ruth was comfortable and then seated himself beside her.  Joe and Hoss sat on the edge of the sofa, looking most uncomfortable and ill at ease.  Adam had crossed to his father’s desk and was looking down at the picture of his mother, as he looked up, his eyes met those of his father and Ben could feel the hostility and condemnation flowing from him.

Hop Sing had out done himself with the meal and Ben felt very grateful to him.  He made Ruth feel welcomed and she chatted to him about his cooking and his homeland which her late husband had visited several times.  Conversation with the boys was more difficult.  Hoss was never at ease with company unless it was of his own choosing and Ben had not expected him to say much.  He had hoped that Joe’s natural ability to charm would shine through, he was not normally shy, but this evening he was quiet and answered in monosyllables.  Adam was polite to Ruth but he studiously avoided speaking to his father unless spoken to, and Ben knew he was containing his anger with difficulty.  Ruth seemed unaware of any hostility and she showed an interest in the ranch, which Ben found touching.

He was quietly relieved when the time came to drive her back to town, at least he would have her to himself for the ride.  He was not the only one to breath a sigh of relief when the door closed behind them.  Adam threw himself in a chair and raised his eyebrows at Hoss.

‘Thank God that’s over.  I don’t think I could have kept up the polite conversation much longer.’

Hoss looked puzzled ‘I thought she was kinda nice.’  he said helping himself to the remains of the apple pie and cream.  He stood in front of the fire eating happily. ‘What did you think, Joe?’

Joe shrugged ‘Ok I guess, as long as she just visits.’

Adam sat upright in his chair ‘Didn’t either of you notice?’

‘Notice what?’ said Hoss his mouth full of pie.

Adam got up from his chair and crossed to the desk, he picked up his mother’s picture and touched the face gently, then handed it to Hoss.  ‘Don’t you think its remarkable.’

Hoss nodded ‘I guess now you mention it, she is rather similar, but so what?.’

Adam took back the picture and touched the frame where it had been repaired, it was still possible to feel the indentation at the back of the frame, where the jeweller had not quite beaten the gold to the correct curve. ‘He could have told me.  It was like looking at a ghost.  My mother’s ghost.’  he emphasised his words.

‘Oh come on, Adam.  That’s a bit much.  You never knew your mother and any way Ruth is older than she was when she died.  It’s just a resemblance that’s all.  Lots of people look alike.’

‘Well, I think its more than that, Pa could have said something, and I’m going to tell him so.’

Joe gave a chuckle ‘This I’d like to see.’

‘You won’t because you’re going to bed.  It’s way past time and you have school tomorrow.’  Adam said testily.  ‘Get going.’

‘Yes, sir.’  Joe replied sarcastically, making a face at his brother and then skipping out of his reach to run up the stairs.  From the safety of the top step, he called down ‘If you tell Pa what you think, I’ll still hear the row from up here.’  with that he slipped into his room and slammed the door noisily.

‘He’s right Adam, Pa will be in no mood to accept criticism.  You’ll just make things difficult.  If he is as set on her as he appears to be, nothing we say will change his mind.  We’ll just have to make the best of it.’  he moved along the sofa until he was opposite his older brother ‘Remember how you acted when Marie came, it only made things hard for you. It turned out fine in the end.’

‘For God’s sake Hoss, this is different.  I was twelve then.  I’m not a child anymore, I don’t have tantrums and sulk.’

Hoss smiled ‘Sounds a bit like one now.  Just because Pa didn’t tell you that Mrs Walsh looked a bit like your mother.’

‘Shut up and go to bed.’  Adam snapped.

Hoss got to his feet ‘I’ll go, but if you take my advice so will you.  You’ll be less likely to get yourself into hot water with Pa if you don’t see him until the morning, after you’ve had time to cool off.’

After Hoss had gone, Adam leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes.  Maybe Hoss was right, he would do no good confronting his father tonight.  Pa was as stubborn as he was himself and any opposition would only make him more determined.  He remembered how he had fought Marie every step for the first few months of their marriage until finally he had admitted that she had won him over with her kindness.  But that had been the action of a jealous child, he was a man now and these feelings couldn’t be the same.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 7

 

 

Nothing was said at breakfast about Ruth’s visit but over the next few weeks, Ben spent more and more time away from the ranch.  He went to Virginia City most days and spent his time squiring Ruth around the countryside and taking her out to dinner, to the Opera House and to introduce her to his friends. Occasionally they would spend an afternoon or evening at the ranch, and gradually she managed to draw Hoss from his shell and he became her champion with his brothers.  Joe was indifferent to her, he behaved when she was around and was polite and pleasant, but nothing more.  Adam simply avoided her whenever possible and when it was not, he was distant and icily polite.  Ben’s constant absences meant that a large part of the work fell on Adam’s shoulders and as well as disliking Ruth, he also resented the extra workload.

 

Ben’s youngest son found this a perfect arrangement.  Pa was away most of the time and Adam was too busy to ask too many awkward questions.  There had been no further developments from his outing with Travis and Joe relaxed and reverted to his usual bubbly personality.  He and his friend Mitch were looking forward to the annual picnic in Virginia City and with this in mind had acquired a supply of firecrackers.  Once purchased firecrackers had to be tested and it wasn’t long before Joe found himself in trouble with his brothers.

It was unfortunate for Joe that he chose to try out his firecrackers in the yard just as Adam rode in on Sport.  Of all the horses on the ranch, Sport was probably the most temperamental and difficult to control.  The noise of the firecracker would have startled any horse, but Sport unseated his rider and bolted before Adam had time to realise what was happening.  Luckily only his pride was dented and he got to his feet with an expression that told Joe he had better make himself scarce.  He started to back up towards the house, never taking his eyes off his older brother who was now advancing toward him with murderous intent.

‘Joe…you wait until I get my hands on you.’ he yelled.

Joe had no intention of waiting, he was about to turn and run when he felt his arms pinion behind him by massive hands.  Hoss had come out of the house just in time to see the string of events unfolding.

‘That was one of the stupidest things I’ve seen you do.’  Hoss shouted at him.

Joe struggled against his brother’s grip, but he knew it was useless.  Once Hoss had hold of him, he hadn’t a chance.

‘He’s all yours Adam.’  Hoss said angrily.  If there was one thing guaranteed to make Hoss mad it was the ill treatment or distress of an animal and Joe knew it.

Adam grabbed hold of Joe’s arm and held it fast ‘Empty your pockets.’ he ordered.

Joe struggled and swore under his breath, which gained him a cuff around the ear from his older brother ‘Watch your language.’

‘How can I empty my pockets when you’re holding my arm?’ yelled Joe, his cheek reddening from the blow his brother had given him.

‘I’ll break it if you don’t start using a decent tone of voice with me.’ Adam threatened, his temper now reaching breaking point.

Joe reached into his pocket and extracted a handful of firecrackers which Adam immediately confiscated, and thrust into his own pocket.

‘Do you have anymore?  What about your other pocket?’  Adam tightened his grip again.

‘It’s empty, I don’t have any more.’  Joe lied, praying his brother wouldn’t check.  The contents of the other pocket was far more damning than a few firecrackers.

Adam released his brother’s arm ‘I catch you with anymore and you’ll answer to Pa, is that clear.’

Joe nodded.  Once Adam had gone to track down his horse, Joe breathed a sigh of relief at his narrow escape.  The loss of a few firecrackers didn’t bother him, he had more in his room. In fact he took Adam’s threat so lightly that by the next day he was in trouble again.

 

It was a warm sunny afternoon and Joe’s least favourite lesson, history.  He was bored and needed a distraction.  He took a couple of firecrackers from his pocket and showed them to Mitch, who nodded with a grin.  Quietly, while Miss Jones had her back turned to the class, Joe held one of the fireworks and Mitch lit it.   It spluttered for a second before Joe tossed it gently along the floor to the front of the class where it exploded with several loud bangs and a shower of sparks.

The effect was spectacular, everyone was startled and several of the girls screamed, a result Mitch and Joe particularly appreciated.   Miss Jones took a moment to recover and then began shouting at the children to calm down.  It was most unfortunate for the culprits that the noise attracted the attention of the school Principal.  Mr Macdonald was a man of endless patience, but one who demanded obedience and commanded respect in his pupils.  He was  not a man to cross, as Joe and Mitch well knew.

It took him several minutes to restore order.

‘Now, all of you face the front ‘ he said calmly ‘I intend to find out who threw that firecracker and no one is leaving today until I do.’

He paused and looked around the class, he knew them well enough to be sure it had come from the far back corner and his estimate covered maybe five or six boys but he could not put a name to the culprit.

‘I expect the person who did this to own up’ he went on.’ I’m waiting’

After a few more minutes of silence he tried again.

‘If I have to, I will cane the whole class, so I suggest that if you know who is responsible you tell me now.’  he didn’t hold out much hope for this tactic, loyalty amongst the group was too strong for anyone to risk telling tales, they were likely to face rougher justice than anything he would hand out.  No one moved, but there were glances from one to the other in the corner and the girls looked nervously at the cane in the corner of the room.

‘Alright, we will search everyone’s desk, someone must have matches to light it.  Miss Jones take the right hand side and I will take the left.’

He had assigned himself the group he thought mostly likely to yield the miscreant.  Both teachers went down the row of desks checking in each.  Macdonald reached Joe and Mitch and without opening the desk knew he had found the culprits.  They both knew that there was no hiding the evidence and their faces gave them away.

‘It’s alright Miss Jones, you can stop searching now, I’ve found what we were looking for’  he looked at them with disappointment and indicated that both boys should follow him to the front of the class, where he left them standing by the desk while he reached for the cane.  Mitch was first and Joe looked away and winced, knowing his turn was coming.  While Mitch walked back to his desk, Mr Macdonald turned his attention to Joe.

Joe held out his left hand, palm upwards and received six strokes of the cane without a murmur, just a flinching of his face revealing his pain each time the cane fell.

‘You may go back to your desk’  Mr Macdonald said as put the cane away.

Joe turned and walked back through his classmates whose faces showed a mixture of admiration and sympathy.   At least he had an excuse for not writing for a while, he thought, Mac had forgotten that he was left handed.  Joe enjoyed small victories like that, it meant the punishment wasn’t so bad.

‘Thank you Miss Jones, I will leave you to resume your class.’

 

On the way home Mitch and Joe discussed their bad luck and the likely consequences.

Mitch paused from saddling his pony and looked at Joe  ‘Trust Mac to come in.  Miss Jones wouldn’t have done anything.’

Joe swung his books from his right hand and ruefully regarded his left  ‘Will you get more trouble at home?’ he asked.

Mitch shrugged ‘Probably, Pa’s bound to notice.  What about you?’

Joe fastened his books to his saddle and sighed ‘If Pa notices, I will. He warned me that any more trouble in school and he would add to whatever punishment I got.’  he paused ‘And I lied to Adam yesterday, told him I hadn’t got any more firecrackers, so I guess he’ll tell Pa if he finds out. Still, Pa’s been away a lot, he might not be home tonight.’  he grinned ‘At least Mrs Walsh is good for something.’

Mitch laughed ‘You might not think that if she marries your Pa.’  he glanced at his friend

‘Do you think they will get married?’

‘Maybe. Adam thinks they will, and he’s mad about it.’

They continued to chat about the likelihood of Joe acquiring a stepmother until they reached Mitch’s turning.

‘You gonna come fishing tomorrow.’ Mitch asked.

Joe hesitated he would like to have said yes, but he had other plans ‘ I can’t tomorrow.  I promised Travis that I’d meet him.’

Mitch snorted in disgust ‘Stay away from him Joe, he’s trouble.  My Pa says he’s got more money than he earns at the livery stable.  He reckons he must be thieving or something, like his Pa and brother.’

Joe flushed and retorted angrily ‘Just because his Pa’s in jail, it doesn’t mean Travis is guilty too.  Folks just pick on him.’

‘Well, I want nothin’ to do with him.’  Mitch replied.

‘Nobody asked you along, anyway.’  Joe jerked Cochise’s head around and cantered off toward home.

Mitch watched his friend for a moment, worry etch on his face.  He should have known better.  Tell Joe not to do something and you just made him more determined.

 

Joe was relieved to find that his father was indeed still out with Ruth, and only his brothers were at the supper table.

‘Did Pa say when he’d be back?’ he asked Adam as Hop Sing served up the roast.

Adam shook his head ‘I’d be the last one to know.’ he said bitterly.

Hoss helped himself to a generous serving before handing the plate to his little brother.

‘He said he was taking Ruth to a play at the Opera House tonight, so I guess he’ll be quite late.’  Hoss informed them.

Adam raised his eyebrows and gave Hoss a look which was not flattering ‘So it’s Ruth now is it, what happened to Mrs Walsh?’ he sneered.

Hoss paused with his fork half way to his mouth ‘She asked me to call her Ruth……just ‘cos you don’t like her, don’t get at me.  I think she is nice and she’s good for Pa.  I’ve never seen him happier.’

‘Yeah, well I think she’s bad news for all of us.  Pa’s never here and the ranch won’t run itself.’  Adam snapped.

The meal continued in heavy silence until Hop Sing brought in the coffee pot and placed it on the end of the table.

‘Pass the coffee Joe, please.’  Adam sighed.  ‘I don’t know why Hop Sing can’t bring it to this end of the table.’  everything was set to annoy him he decided.

Joe forgot his caning and automatically reached out to pass the coffee pot with his left hand.  The weight of the pot, hurt his swollen hand and as he passed it to his brother, it slipped from his grasp spilling the hot coffee over the table and over his arm.  He let out a yell of pain and Hoss immediately rushed to his aid.

Adam jumped back from the hot liquid just in time and yelled at his brother.

‘Watch what you’re doing.’ then realising that Joe really had scalded himself, rushed to the kitchen for some cold water.

He pushed Joe’s left hand and wrist into a bowl of cold water and after a few moments, gently lifted it out to check the damage.

He gave a sigh of relief ‘It’s not too bad, probably won’t even blister.’  he commented as he turned Joe’s hand over to inspect it further.  He stopped and looked hard at his young brother.

Joe caught his brother’s look and felt his face reddening.

‘That…. wasn’t caused by the coffee.’  Adam accused.  ‘Why were you caned in school?’

‘None of your business.’ retorted Joe.

‘I’m making it mine, or I make it Pa’s.  Which is it to be?’  Adam said quietly.

Joe swallowed hard.  Adam was going to be real angry when he found out.  Yesterday’s lie came back to haunt him.

‘I let off a firecracker in history.’  he admitted.

Adam’s voice became ominously quiet, as it always did when he was very angry.

‘I thought you told me, you didn’t have any more.’

Joe shifted uneasily in his chair ‘I meant, I didn’t have any in my pocket.’ he tried to bluff his way out of the corner he was in.

‘Don’t make excuses.  You lied to me.’  Adam glared at Joe, seeming to tower over him as he spoke.

‘Are you gonna tell Pa?’  Joe asked softly.

‘If I do, he’ll skin you alive.’  Adam replied ‘….and I figure that’s about what you deserve.’

Hoss felt a certain sympathy for his little brother ‘Come on Adam, he’s been punished once, let it go.’

For a moment it looked as though Adam would ignore him, he glared at Joe ‘Luckily for you, Pa’s never here to tell.’ he said bitterly  ‘But don’t you ever lie to me again.’

Joe glanced quickly at his brother and then down at the tablecloth again ‘Thanks Adam.’ he said quietly.

‘Let me get some salve for that burn and for your hand.’  Hoss said kindly and he led Joe away to the kitchen.  Adam gazed after them thoughtfully.  The more Pa was away the more trouble he knew Joe would get into and despite his good intentions, Adam knew he wasn’t a suitable surrogate.

 

When Ben eventually did appear at supper a few days later, the incident had more or less been forgotten.  He was pleased to see that the boys were getting along well for once, but he felt an outsider in their conversations.   Hoss did not seem to treat him differently but Joe was quieter than usual with him and Adam was openly hostile.

He watched and waited until he could wait no more.  He wanted to ask Ruth to marry him and he couldn’t bring himself to do that while Adam was still so angry.  He decided that he had to bring the problem out into the open whatever the cost.  He tried to choose his moment carefully and waited until the boys had been chatting about the annual June picnic in Virginia City.

Hoss had worked his way through several helpings of dessert and was ready to tease his little brother.

‘Which of your conquests are you inviting, Joe.’

Joe grinned ‘Haven’t decided yet, there are so many.’  he joked. ‘I might even ask Katie.’

Adam laughed  ‘Sorry little brother, she’s spoken for and you’re too young.’

‘You don’t mean you are still seeing Katie, that must be nearly two months.’ Hoss winked at Joe ‘Sounds serious to me, she must want to marry him.’

Adam gave long suffering sigh ‘You children may think it’s a long time, but I’m not likely to marry someone I’ve only been seeing for two months.’

Joe winked back at Hoss ‘It’s serious, big brother is getting defensive.’

Adam picked up his napkin and threw it at Joe ‘Watch it little brother or you won’t be fit enough to go at all.’  it was a good natured comment and Joe took it as such.

Ben thought that there could not be a better time, the boys were obviously enjoying each other’s company. and at ease.  He cleared his throat a little self-consciously.

‘It will be nice to have a day out together, and whoever you decided to invite, I’m sure Ruth and I will enjoy your company.’

Hoss was the first to respond ‘Hey Pa, that’s great.  Ruth will really enjoy the picnic.’

Adam raised his eyebrows in disgust ‘I would have thought she would be going back home soon.’  he said pointedly.

Ben looked directly at Adam as he spoke ‘She may not be going back.  I intend to ask her to marry me and make her home here.’

The stunned silence that greeted his words filled him with dread.  Adam’s expression was as black as thunder and Joe’s mouth had dropped open in surprise, only Hoss was still smiling and it was he who broke the silence.

‘Congratulations Pa, I’m so pleased.  She is a lovely lady.’  he stood up and gave his father a bear hug that nearly stopped him breathing.

Adam pushed his chair back from the table and rose angrily to his feet ‘I don’t have to tell you what I think, you already know.’  he stormed, turning on his heel and heading for the door.

‘Adam!’  it was a command and because of years of habit, Adam obeyed it.  He stopped and turned to face his father.

‘ Whether you like it or not my mind is made up.  I shall ask Ruth to marry me and I hope she will accept.  It would be easier and more pleasant if you gave us your blessing but it won’t change the situation.  We all have to live together and I think we should discuss this in a civilised manner.’

On the surface Ben appeared calm and in control but inside he was in turmoil.  Adam’s approval meant more to him than he cared to admit.

‘What’s to discuss?  You’ve just said that your mind is made up.  I may have to live with the situation for the time being, but I don’t have to like it.’

Ben sighed ‘Just what is it that makes you so angry?’

Adam took a deep breath ‘You’ve only known her for a few weeks.  You know nothing about her or her past.’  he paused and then said what was really on his mind ‘Are you sure she’s not just a substitute for someone you lost.’

As soon as the words left his mouth, he regretted them.  The look of pain and anguish on his father’s face were more than he could bear.

‘I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.’  he apologised quickly.

Ben swallowed hard ‘If that is what you feel, it is better said.  Maybe if it is out in the open you can begin to understand that your reasoning is coloured by that very same emotion.  I love Ruth for what she is here and now, not for a memory.’

Adam stood silently staring at his father for a few seconds then walked swiftly to the door and out into the yard.

‘I’ll go and talk to him.’  Hoss said quietly.

Ben put his hand on his son’s arm ‘No, not now.  He needs to think this through for himself.’

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 8

 

 

When Adam stormed out of the house, he had no idea where he was going to go, he saddled Sport and rode.    At first his ride was aimless, but gradually he headed through the darkness to the lake.  He had a favourite spot and he found himself wandering along the sandy shore deep in thought.  He hated disagreeing with his father.  He wondered if there was any truth in his father’s accusation. Was he opposed to Ruth simply because she looked like the mother he had never known.  He sat down on the sand and gazed out unseeing across the water.  The sounds of the night were all around him, but he heard nothing.

His mind drifted back to when he had been a small boy.  He had travelled across the country with his father, just the two of them, needing no one.  He could not remember anything about Boston or his grandfather from that time, his memories for that came from his time at college.  He thought of Hoss’s mother, there had been no jealously there.  He had adored her and even been instrumental in bringing her and his father together.  She had not intruded on his relationship with his father, she had complemented it.  They had become a family, especially after Hoss’s birth.  He considered his brother’s reaction to Ruth.  Hoss liked her and defended her, could his brother be right and he wrong.  He justified his opinion by telling himself that Hoss saw good in everyone, his judgement was not a good guide.

He became aware of his surroundings and recalled the first time he had come here with his father and Hoss.  He had loved it then and he still found it a place to retreat to when he was worried or hurt, as he was now.  He smiled to himself, in one way Hoss had been right, he was sitting here now, hurt and unhappy, just as he had once before.  That night, fifteen years ago, could have been a rehearsal for this one, except then he had been twelve years old and his flight from the ranch had started a search.  He grinned ruefully, he doubted that his father was looking for him tonight.

He could recall standing in the living room of the old house yelling at his stepmother.  Marie had asked him quite reasonably to do something, he couldn’t remember what it had been, but he had reacted with a tantrum.  He had said unforgivable things to her culminating in the predictable line that ‘she was not his mother and couldn’t order him around.’  He cringed now at the memory.  His father had overheard every word and had threaten him with a tanning unless he apologised.  He had refused to apologise and had run from the room, retreating to this very spot.

He wished he was twelve years old now.  Then he could allow himself to be found and Pa would patiently explain things and solve all his problems.  All those years ago, Marie had forgiven him and they had worked hard at building a relationship which had been completed when his baby brother was born.  He thought of his little brother now.  What must he be feeling?  Did Joe feel now, as he had then?  It was as if an answer had been given to him.  He knew he had to go back, no matter what it cost his pride.  His little brother would need all the support he could get and it was selfish of him to indulge his feelings when he should be considering Joe’s.

On impulse he took a detour on his way home and spent a few minutes at the site of the old house.  It was dilapidated and looked vaguely eerie in the darkness, but to Adam it was a place of happy memories.  He had lived here for several years and even after the present house was built he and his brothers had played here and camped here on hunting expeditions.  Standing there re-enforced his decision to go home.

It was after three in the morning when he eventually crept into his room, anxious not to wake anyone.  The house was quiet and in complete darkness except for the lamp which always burned low on the upstairs hallway, a relic of the time when the boys had been small and in need of reassurance.  Adam found it reassuring now, it meant that his world had not yet changed that much.

In the room next to Adam’s, Ben sighed and turned over in his bed.  He had lain awake worrying, now he had heard Adam’s door close he could go to sleep.  Within minutes the household was peaceful and the only sound was the ticking of the grandfather clock.

 

Nothing was said of the previous evening.  Ben was content that Adam was at the breakfast table and appeared to be acting normally.  Neither wanted to awaken the feelings of the night before so soon.  The days until the picnic were busy and there was no opportunity for father and son to spend much time alone together.  Ben knew that Adam was avoiding him but he did not feel ready for another argument.

It had been arranged that they would all travel to the picnic together meeting their respective friends at the picnic site.  The surrey was standing in the yard and Hop Sing was filling it with picnic baskets, supervised by Hoss, when Adam came out of the barn leading Sport.

‘Hey, where are you going.  We’re nearly ready.’  Hoss called to him.

Adam gathered the reins in his hands ‘I’m riding over to Katie’s, I’ll meet you at the picnic.’

Hoss put down the basket he had been inspecting and walked over to his brother, catching Sports bridle, as Adam made ready to ride away. ‘I thought we were going together.’

‘Yeah,  well, I ‘d rather go with the Watson’s.’  Adam said bitterly.

Hoss looked worried ‘Pa’s not going to like that.’

‘That’s tough, because just at the moment, I don’t really care what he likes.’

‘Come on Adam, don’t spoil the day, just ‘cos you’re angry.’  Hoss pleaded.

‘I’m trying to avoid spoiling anyone’s day.  You know I won’t be able to hold my tongue if Ruth Walsh is around.  Believe me Hoss, its better this way.’

Hoss watched his brother ride around the barn and turned to see his father also watching from the porch.  From the expression on Ben’s face, Hoss figured it was better to say nothing.

 

Ben refused to let Adam’s decision ruin his day.  They met Ruth at the hotel and Hoss and Joe both made her feel welcome, for which he was grateful.  He was surprised a little that Joe was so animated with her, it was the first time he had shown any interest at all.  In fact, Joe had decided that if Ruth was coming to live with them, he had better find out more about her.  At the moment he had no strong feelings either way but he reckoned that if she was important to Pa then it was better he made an ally than an enemy.  Ruth waited until Hoss and Joe and gone with their friends before she mentioned Adam’s absence.  They were sitting on the grass beside the picnic baskets and she took Ben’s hand in hers.

‘It hasn’t got any easier has it?  He still resents my presence.’  she said quietly.

Ben shook his head ‘I wish he would talk to me.’  He gazed into the distance.  ‘I should have told him more before you met.  I should have told you too.’

Ruth brushed her hand against his cheek ‘You mean that I look like Elizabeth?’

Ben nodded ‘I think that is his real problem.  He never knew his mother and he has a mental image built from pictures and descriptions, he thinks I am trying to recapture something I lost many years ago.’

Ruth caught his face in her hands and turned his head towards her.  She looked deep into his eyes and took a deep breath ‘…and are you?’

Ben leaned forward and kissed her gently ‘If you mean am I trying to recapture a special relationship that exists when you love someone.  Then yes, I suppose I am.’  he held her close to him ‘I loved Elizabeth very much but it has nothing to do with my feelings for you.  I must admit your close resemblance stirred my curiosity on the ferry, but the woman I have fallen in love with is Ruth Walsh, not a ghost from the past.’

He leaned closer to her and they exchanged a lingering kiss.  ‘Do you still doubt that I love you?  he asked when Ruth broke away embarrassed.

‘Ben people are looking at us.’

‘Then you had better agree to marry me now, or I’ll have to try to convince you again.’ he laughed at her discomfiture.

‘What about Adam?’

‘He’ll come around.  He will spend the day with Katie and she’ll work magic on him.  We can tell the boys tonight at the party.’

‘No, not tonight, Ben.  I’d rather wait until its just the family.’  she stuttered, feeling very unsure of herself.

He smiled at her ‘Whatever you say, just so long as the answer is yes.’

She laughed  ‘Of course it is.  I just want to things to be perfect.’

‘You can come to supper tomorrow and tell them then.’

‘Alright, alright.  You really are most impatient.’ she smiled at him.

‘We can have a summer wedding, unless you have family in the east that you want to invite.’  he paused ‘You don’t have to go back first, do you?’

She glanced at his anxious face and a faraway look came into her eyes ‘No, I have no one.’  she seemed to pull her self together ‘How about the end of July?  That would give me time to make any arrangements for my business affairs.’

Ben smiled ‘It sounds far too long to wait, but I suppose there are things to sort out.’

She got to her feet ‘Its getting late, I’d better go back to the hotel and change for the party.  I must look my best if I’m being escorted by my future husband.’

He grinned ‘You don’t know how good that sounds.  I’ll walk you back.’

She shook her head ‘No, I’m fine.  You go and find those boys, I want a dance with each of them tonight, before they know they are acquiring a wicked stepmother.’

Ben laughed ‘Well if you’re sure.  Hoss will step on your toes and Joe will be too embarrassed to dance….’ he hesitated his expression suddenly sad.

‘…and Adam?’  she prompted.

‘Adam’s a good dancer.’ he replied.

‘But he’s unlikely to ask me to dance.  Isn’t that what you were going to say.’  she kissed him lightly on the cheek ‘I’ll just have to do the asking.’

He watched her walk away towards the hotel and wondered if it was going to be that easy.

 

Adam had spent a pleasant morning with the Watson family.  Mr and Mrs Watson looking favourably on Virginia City’s most eligible bachelor as an escort for their only daughter, even if he did have a bit of a reputation for changing girlfriends frequently.  Katie and Adam managed to slip away from them after the picnic and wandered happily among the crowds.  There were events to watch and sideshows to enjoy and they had no difficulty avoiding both the Watsons and Ben.  It was late afternoon and they were making their way back to the Watsons’ house to allow Katie time to change for the dance, when Adam spotted Ruth.  She was hurrying along C street and Adam guessed that she must be going back to the hotel on the same errand as Katie.  As he watched she walked passed the hotel and turned down an alley.  Adam wracked his brains to remember where the alley led.

‘Katie, would you mind walking the rest of the way alone?  I’ve just seen someone, I need to talk to.’  he asked.

Katie grinned ‘As long as it’s not another girl.  I guess I can manage a block by myself.’

‘I’ll pick you up at seven thirty.’  he immediately began to follow Ruth.

As he turned into the alley, she was leaving it at the other end, turning to the left behind the stores and saloons of C street.  At first he had intended to catch her up and apologise for his ill manners, but now he was intrigued by her destination.  He cautiously peered around the end of the wooden building at the bottom of the alley.  Ruth had stopped at the rear entrance to the Silver Dollar and was talking to two men. One looked vaguely familiar but the other was a stranger to him.  He tried to place the first man, but it was as if he reminded him of someone rather than knew him.  He couldn’t get close enough to hear the conversation and had to duck back quickly when Ruth began to re-trace her steps.

The minute Ruth reached the hotel, Adam crossed the street to the front entrance of the Silver Dollar.  He went to the bar and ordered a beer and then glanced around.  The men were not there, he was disappointed and wondered where they had gone and what connection they had to Ruth Walsh.  She had something to hide, he was sure of it.  He hung around until it was time to collect Katie, but neither man re-appeared.

 

Ruth got her wish to dance with Hoss and he didn’t step on her toes.  He enjoyed her company and was delighted to see his father so happy.  Joe refused the dance as Ben had expected, he preferred to hang around with his young friends.  They had enjoyed the picnic and Joe had even managed to throw a few firecrackers when he was sure Adam was not in the vicinity.  It would have been a good day if Travis had not showed up at the dance.  He cornered Joe at the back of the barn and as he was accompanied by several of his gang, there was no way out.

‘Hey, you avoiding me Little Joe.’  he taunted.  Joe had learned that Travis was a deadly enemy and wished he had never got involved with him, but it was too late now.

He tried to appear unconcerned ‘No, of course not, just haven’t been in town much.’

‘Well now you are.  How about that money you owe me?’  Travis’s manner was threatening.

Joe looked around for help but there was none ‘I don’t owe you anything.’ he said as quietly as he could.

Travis laughed ‘Five dollars should cover it. Don’t you think boys.’ he grinned at his friends.  ‘Unless of course you’d rather I asked your Pa for money.’

Joe was scared but he tried not to show it ‘I don’t have that much, just a dollar.  Here.’ he held it out to Travis, who snatched it up.

‘You had better get the rest, or we’ll have to chat to the Sheriff about your visit to Morton’s store, or maybe we’ll just talk to your Pa.’  he pushed Joe hard against the side of the barn and punched him viciously in the ribs. ‘You’ve got until next Saturday to find me five dollars kid.’

Joe clutched his side as he watched Travis walk away.  There was no way he could get five dollars.  He had already given Travis everything he had.  He knew that even if he found the money, that would not be the end of it.  Travis would be back for more.  He sank down on to a hay bale and buried his head in his hands.

‘Hey, little brother, what’s wrong with you, where are all those pretty girls you usually find?’

Joe looked up startled to find Adam and Katie standing over him.

‘I’m Ok, just tired, I guess.’  Joe replied, wishing they would go away.

Adam looked at Katie and she read his message.  ‘I’ll be back shortly, I want to talk to Jenny.’ she said and she slipped away into the barn.

Adam knelt down in front of his brother ‘Ok, buddy what’s wrong? he said softly, he could see that Joe was close to tears.

Joe longed to tell him, but he daren’t, the consequences were too terrible.  ‘I’m alright, honest, there’s nothing wrong.’

Adam put his arm around his little brother’s shoulder ‘I thought we’d agreed you were going to tell me the truth from now on and that isn’t the truth, is it?’

‘Please don’t ask me, Adam.  I’m fine really.’  Joe begged.

Adam jumped to the only conclusion that made any sense ‘Is it because of Ruth?’ he asked.

Joe grabbed the excuse like a drowning man clutching for a straw ‘I guess so, I can’t get used to the idea of someone else being around all the time.’

Adam hugged him ‘Neither can I.  I guess we’ll have to look after each other.  I’ve been watching them tonight, I don’t think we will have to wait long before they tell us the wedding date.’

‘Do you think things will change much?’  Joe asked his fear being replaced with a comfortable feeling of protection from his big brother.  It wasn’t often that they were on the same side and Joe enjoyed having his brother confide in him.

‘I suppose they’re bound to.  Look this is supposed to be a party.  Come and dance with Katie, you said you wanted to.’ he grinned.

Joe got to his feet,  ‘I was just joking.’

‘Well I’m not.  It’ll do you good to dance with a pretty girl.  Just make sure you give her back when the music stops.’

They went back into the barn and Adam beckoned to Katie and whispered in her ear.  She laughed ‘Of course I’ll dance with him.  But don’t blame me if we don’t come back.’  she winked at Joe who blushed at her attention.

Adam retired to the side of the dance floor and watched them with amusement.  Hoss saw him alone and sauntered over.

‘Lost your girl, I see.’  he grinned.

‘Yeah, I’m not so sure it was such a good idea now.’  he grinned as Katie held Joe closer to her. ‘In a couple of years I might really lose out to him. He’s getting to be a good looking kid and he can dance.’

‘Which is more than I can.’  said Hoss his eyes on his little brother.

Adam glanced sideways at his brother ‘Oh, I don’t know, you and the future Mrs Cartwright seemed to be doing Ok.’

‘Do you have to be so against her?  She really is nice when you get to know her and if you’re right about her being our future stepmother.  It might make life more pleasant all round if you would try to get along.’

‘Ok, I’ll do my best.  But I still think there is something she’s hiding.’

Hoss sighed, he wished his brother wasn’t quite so stubborn, once he made up his mind, it took an earthquake to move him.

Adam retrieved Katie and swung her into the next dance.  Hoss and Joe stood and watched for a minute or two and then went looking for their father.  They found him deep in conversation with Roy Coffee.

‘Where’s Ruth?’ Hoss asked.

Ben glanced around the room ‘I’m not sure, she was spirited away by George Danvers but that was a couple of dances ago.’  the music stopped and the dancers parted but there was no sign of Ruth.  ‘I guess she’ll find her way back to me.’ he grinned.

In fact Ruth had been passed from one neighbour to another as the dances continued.  All Ben’s friends wanted to get to know her, they could read the signs as well as his sons.  She was standing quietly on the opposite side of the barn to Ben, watching him and comparing him favourably with the other men she had danced with.  A voice at her elbow startled her.

‘You seem to be very popular tonight.  Do you have a space in your programme for a dance with someone who needs to apologise to you.’

‘Why Adam, of course I do and there is no need to apologise.  I can understand your concern.’  she smiled up at him.  He was a lot like his father and very handsome.

He took her arm and steered her towards the dancers ‘I should apologise and I do, but that doesn’t mean I’m any happier about the situation.  Hoss and I are old enough to go our own way, if we choose.  I just want to be sure that Pa and Little Joe don’t get hurt.’

She nodded ‘I think your father is old enough to make his own decisions, don’t you?’

They finished the dance in silence and Adam led her back to where Ben was still talking to Roy.

‘I think they are about to announce the last dance, so I had better go and find Katie or my life won’t be worth living.  I’ll see her home after the dance, so don’t wait up for me Pa.’  he grinned.

Ben smiled.  He had watched Adam and Ruth dancing.  They might not be the best of friends but it looked as though things might turn out alright after all.  He danced the last dance with Ruth and then walked her back to the hotel before joining Hoss and Joe for the ride home.  Tomorrow he would tell them about the wedding.

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 9

 

 

‘I thought we would drive up by the lake again before we go back to the ranch, its such a lovely afternoon.’  Ben said as helped Ruth into the buggy.

He had remained in town after church and had taken Ruth to lunch.  Most people in town now knew that sooner or later they would hear of marriage plans and Ben was proud to be Ruth’s escort.  His friends liked her and she liked them, it was all working out so well, if only Adam would accept their relationship, he would be a happy man.  He was about to climb into the buggy when the Virginia City sheriff  hailed him from across the street.  Ben waited while he came over to them.

Roy tipped his hat to Ruth. ‘Afternoon, Ma’am.’

‘Didn’t see you in church today, Roy.  The guilty getting in the way of your confessions these days.’  Ben grinned.

‘Something like that.’  Roy said quietly.

Ben regarded his friend with curiosity  ‘Sounds serious.  Have I robbed a bank without knowing it.’  Ben was still light hearted.

Roy sighed ‘Maybe I’m meddling where I’ve no business to, but then that’s my job.  There’s something I think you should know.’

Ben sobered at Roy’s tone. ‘What is it, Roy.?’

‘It’s about young Joe.’  he hesitated ‘He’s running around with Simmons and his bunch.  They’re trouble, Ben.  I’ve arrested two of ’em in the last week for thieving.  Can’t tie anything to Simmons yet but I will.’

Ben frowned ‘I didn’t know.  I’ll have a word with him when I get home.  I’m sure he wouldn’t get involved in anything dishonest, Roy.’

Roy shook his head ‘You sure you’d know what he was doing.  I reckon I see more of him than you do.’

Ben felt his temper rising ‘I think I’d better leave, before I say something I’ll regret.’ his voice was low and quiet, a sure sign that he was holding his temper in check ‘I value our friendship Roy, but you have no right to criticise the way I bring up my family.’

Roy was normally mild mannered but he felt strongly that Ben was neglecting his sons and he couldn’t resist telling him so.

‘He’s running wild Ben, and Adam can’t be expected to run the ranch and act as father to Joe.  Maybe you should admit that you’ve been neglecting them.’

Ben climbed into the buggy ‘I know what I’m doing and I’ll thank you not to interfere in my family.’

Roy shrugged ‘Just so long as you remember that it is your family that you are bent on destroying with your stubborn refusal to face the truth.’  he pointed a finger at Ben to emphasise his words,  ‘Understand this, I represent the law in this town and if Joe breaks the law, I won’t treat him any different to those other youngsters.’

Ben looked straight ahead and started the buggy down the street.  Roy watched until it was out of sight.  He hoped that a friendship of more than ten years would not be put at risk, but he knew that sooner or later it was going to be tested.  He was sure that Simmons was persuading others to steal for him by promises or threats and he just hoped that Joe had managed to steer clear of it up to now.

 

Ruth allowed Ben the luxury of silence for a while.  She glanced at his hard set face several times but did not know what to say.  It was obvious that Roy Coffee’s message had hit home.  Finally she could stand the tension no more.

‘Maybe we should postpone the wedding.  I have been monopolising your time.’  she said quietly reaching out to take his free hand.

He looked up startled at the intrusion on his thoughts ‘Don’t be silly.  Everything will be alright when we are married.’  he smiled ‘You’ll be with me at the ranch and the boys will have two parents to give them all the time in the world.’

‘You are worried about Joe aren’t you?’

Ben nodded ‘He has been worrying me ever since I got back from San Francisco.  He seems to go from being on the top of the world to the depths of despair without any reason.  He has always been the most difficult to handle because of his moods but this is more than that.  I just put it down to his age.  I mean Adam went through something similar, though nothing as bad as this.’

‘You don’t really think he is involved with this gang, do you?’

Ben shook his head ‘Joe can be a handful at times and I know he’s not above some pretty disastrous mischief in school and out, but he’s honest.  He’ll disobey me, sure what boy doesn’t try to get around the rules, but I’d stake my life that none of my boys have ever been involved in cheating or stealing and they don’t lie to me.’

‘You’re very proud of that, aren’t you?’

‘Yes, I guess so.  It hasn’t always been easy, but I think I’ve given them enough security and love to know that whatever they do I’ll always be there, provided they tell me the truth.  If I didn’t trust them to come to me if there is a problem, I’d feel I’d failed as a father.’  he stopped the buggy and turned to look directly at Ruth ‘Even this problem with Adam’s acceptance of you is part of that trust.  I may not like what he is saying, but at least he feels secure enough to say it and not keep it as a hidden resentment that could surface later and destroy everything.’

Ruth nodded quietly ‘He said as much to me last night.’

Ben smiled softly ‘I wondered what you two were talking about.’

‘He’s worried about you.’ she said softly and touched his cheek.

‘I think I’m old enough to know my own mind, don’t you?’  he smiled at her.

She laughed ‘They were almost exactly my words to him.’

‘Well since we are both so old and sensible, let’s do something crazy.’  he said suddenly.

‘What?’  Ruth replied as he gigged Sandy into a trot.

‘Wait and see.’ was his mysterious reply.

He drove for a few more minutes and then turned off the main track and up a steep incline, finally stopping the buggy and helping Ruth down to the ground.

‘We have to walk from here.  I hope you’re feeling fit.’

‘Where are we going?’

‘I haven’t been here for years so it may not be quite the same, but I am going to show you the most magnificent view in the world.’

He took her hand and helped her over the rocks until they could hear the sound of rushing water.

‘This way.’  he led her forward towards the sound.

Suddenly in front of them was a waterfall, tumbling down the rocks to the stream beneath.  It was not large, but it was very pretty with the sunlight sparkling on the spray, making tiny rainbows of colour.

‘Oh, its lovely, Ben.’ Ruth breathed.

‘Its pretty spectacular in spring but that’s not what I want to show you.  We have to go under the fall to the other side.  You can only do that in summer when the water is low.’

‘But we will get soaked.’ she protested.

He led her forward and she saw that under the falls there was a passageway that was remarkably dry.  The cool air was refreshing and it was only seconds before they  emerged on the other side.

‘Look down to your right.  Isn’t that beautiful’  Ben held her in front of him with his arms about her waist, his face buried in her hair.

Ruth was spellbound by the view ‘It’s so peaceful as if there was no one in the world except us.’

‘Just for the moment, there isn’t.  Which is why I brought you here.  I know you are worried about this evening and I wanted to have sometime alone with you, I thought it might help.’  he reached into his pocket ‘…and I wanted to give you this, I thought you should wear it this evening.’

He opened a small box and removed a ring set with an emerald and tiny diamonds.  Ruth gave a small gasp as he slipped it on to her finger.

‘Oh, Ben, its beautiful.’  she stood on tiptoe and kissed him.

‘I love you Ruth.’  he said as he held her close and gave her a lingering kiss that left Ruth breathless.

She seemed to hesitate for a mere second before replying very softly ‘I love you too, Ben.’

She held his loving gaze for a few moments then turned away ‘How did you find this place?  It’s so far from the main trail.’

Ben sighed ‘It was a long time ago……’  he paused unsure whether to go on.

Ruth finished the sentence for him ‘… and with someone else.’ she smiled at him.             ‘It’s alright, I know that we can’t change the past.  If I could, I would have met you years ago.  We both have a past and things we wish were different but that doesn’t have to spoil the present, does it?’

There was almost a pleading note in her voice, but Ben was thinking of another time and did not notice her worried look.

He shrugged his shoulders his mood now sombre rather than happy.

‘It’s getting late, we had better get back to the ranch or Hop Sing will throw the dinner out.’

He helped her back to the waterfall with only a cursory glance at the view.  It had been a mistake to come here.  His thoughts were of Marie, when they should be for Ruth.

 

On the drive back Ben could not get the past from his mind.  He should be thinking of his future with Ruth, but images of Marie and Inger and finally Liz kept intruding.  Why did everything remind him of the past, it made him feel old and melancholy.  Every step he took with Ruth, he seemed to have taken before in another time or another place and with someone else and each time those steps had led to tragedy.

Ruth watched him, seeing his pain but unable to reach him.  Her love for him had grown from nothing, until now it was an all consuming passion that she knew could destroy them both.  She wished that she could have stopped the world back there at the waterfall.  If she really loved him she would leave.  Like a child she believed that if she wished enough it would all come right in the end.  With both of them deep in thought most of the return journey was made in silence, broken only as they got closer to the house.

‘The boys should be almost through with the chores by the time we get there, so we can eat fairly early.  That will give us time to talk to them properly after supper.’  Ben explained.

‘I’d rather tell them before we eat.  I’m so nervous I don’t think I could eat until they know.’  she said quietly, turning her hand over to admire the emerald ring that now adorned it.

He gave her a reassuring hug and almost in an effort to convince himself, kept his arm about her shoulders.

‘It will all be fine, you’ll see.  They really are good boys when you get to know them.’

Ruth squeezed his hand affectionately ‘You don’t have to convince me.  I know they are.’

He swung the buggy into the yard and pulled up in front of the house.  Hoss immediately came from the porch, where he had been waiting, and helped Ruth down.

‘I’ll take care of the buggy, Pa.’

‘Thank you, son.  Where are Joe and Adam?’  he glanced around the yard.

‘They’ve started the chores, we’ll be in when we ‘ve finished.’

‘Fine, I expect Hop Sing will call you if he has supper ready early.’

Ben and Ruth disappeared into the house and Hoss led the horse and buggy away.

 

In the barn Adam and Joe were arguing.  Adam accused Joe of being lazy because he wasn’t working as hard as his big brother would have liked, and the more Adam scolded, the slower Joe worked.

Hoss came in slowly shaking his head ‘Don’t you two ever stop?’  he complained.

Adam looked up and leaned on his fork.

‘I take it, that was Pa with Ruth.  I have a feeling that tonight we get the announcement.’

‘Well, watch what you say and don’t spoil it with your sarcastic remarks.’  Hoss snapped.

‘Don’t worry, I’ll pretend to be delighted.  That suit you?’  he said caustically.

Hoss glanced at Joe ‘Don’t forget some people might follow your lead and get themselves into trouble for it.’

Joe gave Hoss an angry glare ‘You don’t have to talk about me like I was a kid.   Anyhow, I wouldn’t copy him if he was the last person on earth.’

‘See, I have no influence at all on our baby brother.’

Joe was brushing Cochise and he hurled the brush at his older brother’s head.              Adam ducked and the brush went sailing out of the barn door.

‘Don’t call me a baby.’ he yelled.

Adam was about to make a grab for Joe, when Hoss caught his arm.

‘You asked for that, leave him alone.’  he said threateningly.

Adam shrugged and went back to his task, while Joe collected the brush, glaring at his older brother as he passed..

It took about half an hour to finish everything and the three boys worked without talking until they heard Hop Sing call from the porch.  Joe had taken his jacket off earlier and hung it over Cochise’s stall, and as Adam passed he picked it up and threw it at Joe.

‘Don’t forget this.’  he said.

Joe wasn’t expecting it and the jacket fell to the floor.

Adam, who had cooled down considerably, regretted his action and immediately bent to pick it up.

‘Sorry Joe,….I….’ as he grabbed the jacket something heavy fell from one of the pockets ‘What’s this?’

Adam gathered the jacket in one hand and picked up a pocket knife from the dust with the other.  He turned it over in his hand.

‘Hey that’s nice.  I wouldn’t mind one like that myself.  Where’d you get it Joe?’ he said casually.

Joe made a grab for the knife with an angry glare.

‘None of your business.’ he snapped.

Adam simply held it above his head, out of his little brother’s reach.

‘Huh… if you don’t tell me, you don’t get it back.’ he teased. ‘I reckon I could make good use of it.’  he grinned at Joe.

Joe’s temper exploded ‘Give it back.’ he yelled.

‘Stop teasing him and give it back, Adam.’  Hoss sighed, tired of mediating  in his brothers quarrels.

‘Not ’til he tells me where he got it.’ said Adam even more determined now that Hoss had taken Joe’s side.

He held Joe off with one hand, while examining the knife with the other.  It was a beauty with a silver inlaid pattern and Adam was sure he hadn’t seen Joe with it before.

Joe knew that he was not going to get it back until he said something, and he wished he had thought more quickly.  He realised that now he had made a fuss, Adam would pay more attention to the answer.

‘Ok, I won it from a friend, it was a bet.’  he said quickly.

Adam raised his eyebrows ‘Some bet, you’ve got some rich friends.  Who was it?’

Joe reached out again for the knife ‘Give it back, now.’ he begged.

Adam was still doubtful but Hoss grabbed the knife and gave it to Joe.

‘Stop fooling around Adam, I want my supper.’

Joe tucked the knife back into his pocket and followed Hoss up to the house, his heart was beating far too fast.  He hoped Adam would not mention the knife to his father and would let the subject drop.  He knew he should have got rid of it, but some how his conscience wouldn’t let him throw it away and  he could think of no way to return it to it’s rightful owner, without bringing disaster on his own head.

Adam walked more slowly, his mind working overtime on what Joe had just told him.  There was no way that Joe or any of his friends could have afforded such a knife and certainly not to put up for a bet.  He made a mental note to question his little brother further.

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 10

 

 

‘You two, go get washed up for supper.’  Ben was instructing Hoss and Joe as Adam walked into the room.  Joe glanced hurriedly at his older brother before heading for the kitchen.  Adam could see that he was still nervous about something.

‘Good evening, Ruth.’  he said politely ‘I guess I had better go and get cleaned up too.  It’s hot work doing chores today.  Even on a Sunday there’s plenty to do.’  he caught his father’s eye as he spoke and Ben recognised the accusation in them.’

After he had gone to his room to change from his work clothes, Ben sighed.

‘He’s not going to make this easy for me, is he?’

Ruth gave him a hug ‘You must spend more time here.  I’ve taken you away from your family and your work and that’s not fair.’

Ben smiled ‘Then you must spend more time here too.  If it’s going to be your home, you may want to change things. You can get to know Hop Sing and the ranch hands before we get married.’

Ruth wandered around to his study ‘I love the house and I don’t want to change anything that you have chosen.’

She stopped by his desk and looked at the map on the wall behind it.  Her eyes travelled across to the set of pistols and the bookcase and finally to the desk.  As she looked up she met his gaze.  Ben knew at once what she was thinking and he flushed a deep scarlet.

‘I’m sorry…., I didn’t think.  I should have …put them away before now.’  he said haltingly.

He crossed to stand beside her and she caught his arm as he reached out for the first picture.

‘No, let me look at them.  We can’t go on pretending the past never happened.  Then if you still feel you want to put them away, you can.  But I would never suggest it, they are part of what you are and part of what the boys are.  Show them to me, please.’

Ben picked up the first picture ‘This is Inger, Hoss’s mother.  She was from Sweden and we met in Illinois and travelled west together.  Hoss was just a baby when she died, he really can’t remember her too well.  Adam adored her, I guess she was his mother in all the things that matter to a small child.’

He placed the picture down flat on the desk and picked up the second.

‘This is Marie, Joe’s mother.  She was French Creole from New Orleans and Joe has inherited her fiery temperament.  He can remember her but not very well.’

Ruth looked thoughtful ‘She’s very beautiful.  It was her that you took to the waterfall, wasn’t it?’

Ben nodded ‘Yes, we found it together not long after we were married.’

Ruth looked around the room ‘She designed this house, I can feel her presence in this room.’

Ben looked worried ‘I said that you could change anything that you want to.  It is your home now.’

She shook her head ‘I didn’t mean that.  I meant that I could feel the happiness of a family here.’

He placed Marie’s picture beside Inger’s and took up the third frame.

‘This is Elizabeth.’ he said softly.

Ruth studied this picture more intently and hesitated for long moments before she spoke.

‘She does look a lot like me, doesn’t she.  No wonder Adam finds it difficult to accept me.’

‘That’s nonsense.  She died when he was born.  He has only ever had a picture, how can he hold something like that against you.’  Ben said sharply.

‘Maybe it’s because he never knew her that he feels uncomfortable with me.’  Ruth said perceptively.

Ben took the picture from her and fingered the frame thoughtfully as he looked at the familiar face.  Something was wrong but he could not figure out what it was.  He placed the three pictures together and then slid them gently into one of the desk drawers.

‘You don’t have to do that, you know.’  Ruth said quietly.

‘Yes, I do.’  he replied just as softly.

He moved around the desk and took her in his arms and was about to kiss her, when Hop Sing announced supper.  He drew back a little, then kissed her lightly on the cheek.   Joe had come out from the kitchen ahead of Hop Sing and he watched from beside the table, with ill concealed disgust.

 

Adam came down the stairs slowly taking in the scene below and noting his younger brother s expression.  He glanced towards the desk and paused, it had started already.

Once they were seated with Ruth to his left beside Adam, Hoss and Joe opposite, Ben bowed his head to offer thanks.  He waited until they had each served themselves before he spoke.  He glanced at Ruth and she smiled her encouragement.

‘I know you’ve all been expecting this, but I think it is still right to tell you our plans.  Ruth has consented to be my wife and we will be getting married sometime in July.’    As he spoke he saw Adam’s face and what was reflected there made him hurry his words.

‘That’s great Pa.  Ruth I hope you will be happy here with us.’  Hoss said quickly before Adam could speak.

Adam gave a small smile.  It was so unusual for Hoss to take the lead in this sort of situation, usually his embarrassment held him back.

‘Yes, congratulations Ruth.’ he said, pointedly ignoring his father.

Joe looked from one to the other, he was aware of the tension at the table, but did not understand the implication of Adam’s remark.  He kept his eyes on his plate and said nothing.

Ben was angry but he refused to allow Adam’s sarcasm to ruin the evening.

‘Ruth has some business affairs to sort out before the wedding, but she will be spending more time here with us.  I’m sure you will make her feel at home and help her all you can.  She’s not used to living on a ranch.’  Ben covered his anger by pouring another glass of wine.

‘I expect you’ll want to make some changes around here, it’s a pretty masculine household.’  Adam leaned back in his chair and sipped his wine, watching Ruth over the rim of his glass.

Ruth decided that it would do no good to rise to the bait.  She spoke quietly but firmly.

‘No, I’ve already told your father that I love the house, just the way it is.’

Adam threw a questioning look at Hoss.

‘Oh, I thought I noticed a change already.’ he stopped and looked directly at Hoss ‘Didn’t you notice that the pictures aren’t on Pa’s desk?’

Hoss looked put out, he didn’t want to respond but felt he had to.

‘No, I guess I didn’t.’

‘I put them away, if you want your mother’s picture in your room, you can have it.  It’s unfair to ask Ruth to have them in the living room.’  Ben said quietly trying to defuse the situation.

‘It’s unfair to expect us to accept her without knowing anything about her.’  was Adam’s caustic response.

‘That’s enough. If you can’t be civil you will leave the table.’  Ben fixed Adam with a look that said he was in danger of going too far.

Ruth put down her knife and fork and reached out to touch Ben’s hand.

‘Please, I don’t want that.’

The meal continued in an uncomfortable silence as both Ben and Ruth tried to think of something to say.  Surprisingly it was Hoss who came to the rescue.  He hated an atmosphere and he genuinely liked Ruth.

‘I was thinking that Ruth might like to try out Rusty.’  he smiled at Ruth ‘You’ll need a good horse when you live way out here and Rusty is one of the best.  He’s real quiet and good tempered and he’ll look after you.’

Ben mentally gave thanks for Hoss’s intervention.  ‘That’s a good idea, son.’

‘Well, maybe I could take Ruth riding and show her some of the work we do.’  Hoss went on, pleased that the tension was lifted.

Ruth too relaxed ‘I’d like that.  Would you come with us Joe?’

Joe shrugged but gave no answer, he was still worrying about the incident in the barn.  He too had noticed the pictures had been moved and he had seen the kiss.  Everything was moving too fast for him.

Ben smiled ‘Joe has school, so it would have to be next weekend if he is to accompany you.’

Joe brightened a little, maybe there was a way out of school. ‘If I gave up school, I could show you around and get more work done.’ he tried.

‘Nice try, young man.  But school comes first.’ Ben said lightly.  He helped Ruth to dessert and then filled his own plate.  Passing it to Hoss he added ‘Joe and school are like oil and water, its difficult if not impossible to get them to mix.’

‘Oh, but you must go to school Joe, there are so many opportunities for those with a good education.  I’m sure there must be things you enjoy at school.’

‘Nothin, I can think of.’  was Joe’s sullen reply.

He was picking at his dessert as he spoke and did not see his father’s warning frown.

‘Well, now I’m here, maybe I can help.  I taught school back east for a while.’

Joe sighed ‘I don’t need another schoolteacher.’

‘Joseph!.’  Ben spoke sharply, but Joe chose to ignore the second warning.

‘Well I don’t.’  He snapped, heedless of the trouble he was storing for himself.

Suddenly, all his brothers’ teasing about stepmothers came back to him. What if they were right, they had experienced this situation before.   He hesitated for a moment, but his unhappiness and his temper got the better of him.

‘…..and I don’t need a stepmother.’

‘That’s enough, young man.’  Ben voice was like ice.

Once again Joe ignored the words and the tone and continued, his temper running high. .

‘It’s like Adam said, she’s just going to change everything and interfere.’ he glared at Ruth ‘Why didn’t you stay back east?’

Hoss put his hand on his brother’s arm in an effort to cool the situation.

‘Take it easy Joe.’ he whispered.

But Joe was frightened and angry at a situation which was out of his control.  He got to his feet and faced Ruth across the table.

‘We don’t want you here.  Why don’t you go away and leave us alone.’  he shouted.

Ben too got to his feet ‘Apologise at once.’  he said sternly.

But Joe’s temper was out of control ‘Why should I?’ he retorted.

He looked to Adam for support, but his older brother looked away embarrassed at his little brother’s outburst, knowing that he was at least partly responsible.

Ben contained his temper with difficulty.

‘Upstairs, now!  I’ll deal with you in the morning.’  he snapped.

Joe hesitated for just a second ‘Fine, I don’t want to be with her anyway.’ he turned on his heel and strode up the stairs, slamming his door shut behind him.

For a moment it looked as though Ben would follow him, but he glanced at Ruth’s stricken face and went to her instead.  He put his arms around her shoulders.

‘I’m so sorry.  He didn’t mean what he said, he loses his temper far to easily. He will apologise tomorrow.’

Ruth shook her head, she was close to tears.  ‘Take me back to the hotel Ben, please.’  it came out almost as a sob.

Ben nodded ‘Hoss get the buggy ready for me, will you.’

Hoss was too shocked to speak, he simply followed his father’s instructions.

Adam was still seated at the table, the only one seemingly unaffected.  He got to his feet and helped Ruth with her cloak.

‘It seems that my young brother is not too keen on the idea of a stepmother either.’  he said quietly, so that his father would not hear.  ‘Your plan’s not going too smoothly at the moment, is it?’

It was the final straw for Ruth and the tears rolled unheeded down her cheeks.

Ben did not hear Adam’s words, but he did see the effect on Ruth and as he opened the door he snapped at Adam.

‘I don’t doubt that you had more than a little to do with Joe’s behaviour.  I shall want to talk to you when I get back.’

He put his arm protectively around Ruth and escorted her to the buggy which Hoss had brought up to the porch.

 

Hoss flew at his brother the moment the buggy was out of sight.

‘You couldn’t be pleased for them, could you.  You had to be cutting and sarcastic.  I hope you’re satisfied.  Ruth’s upset, Pa’s angry and Joe’s in trouble.  I used to look up to you, but I don’t know you anymore.’

To Hoss’s surprise, Adam nodded.

He had now had a few moments to look back of the events of the last hour and he was not proud of the part he had played.  He had been childish and selfish and he knew it.

‘You’re right, it was my fault.  If it’s any consolation to you, I feel bad about Joe and Pa is going to give me hell when he gets back.’ he sighed and sank into a leather chair.  ‘I should have set a good example for Joe, instead of encouraging him to question Ruth.’  he looked thoughtful and stared at the back of his hands ‘You know I think they really do love each other.’

‘Of course they do.’  Hoss interrupted.  ‘Why else would they get married?’

Adam gave a hollow laugh ‘My simple brother.  Pa’s rich and I think she is hiding something.  Together that could be a deadly combination, if you stop to think about it.’

‘Why do you always look for the bad instead of the good.’  Hoss said scornfully.

Adam gave a rueful grin ‘My pessimistic nature, I guess.’  he got to his feet.

‘Where are you going?’

‘To talk to Joe, see if I can think of some way to get him out of the hole, I got him into. Pa’s pretty mad at both of us.  But I guess that at least he will consider me to old for a tanning.’ he gave a rueful grin  ‘Although judging by his expression when he left, I wouldn’t bet on it.’

 

Joe’s temper, while quick to rise was equally quick to cool, once he had time to himself.  He knew he had gone too far tonight, and retribution would surely follow.  He wished he could take back the hot words, but like always, once he had said them he had to suffer the consequences.  He wandered to the window and looked out at the stars. It was a clear night and he could pick out individual stars.  His father had taught him a little from his seafaring days and Joe remembered the pleasant evenings they had spent on the porch identifying different constellations.

When he had been very small Pa had told him that his mother was watching over him like the stars and as he looked into the night sky, memories of her came back to him.

They were misty and tinged with sadness, most of all he could recall intangible things such as her perfume and the sound of her voice when she sang to him.  How could a stranger like Ruth ever take her place.  He moved over to the bed and picked up the silver locket which contained her picture.  A feeling of loneliness overwhelmed him and he was a little boy again, he sank down on to the feather bed and let the tears come.

The sound of the door opening startled him and he quickly wiped his tears away with the back of his hand.  He was expecting his father and was relieved to see that it was Adam.  Immediately the defence mechanism he used to hide his fears swung into action.

‘What do you want?’ he snarled, covering his sorrow with anger.

The last thing he wanted was to let his older brother know he was crying.  He was too old at fourteen for tears and Adam would surely tease him.

‘Come to gloat, I suppose, ‘cos I’m in trouble again.’ he continued.

Adam shook his head ‘Nope, ‘cos I’m in deeper than you this time.  I thought maybe we could put our heads together to find a way out of it.’ his brother said quietly.

He sank down on to Joe’s bed and took the locket from his little brother.

‘She sure was beautiful.  You know I hated her when she first got here.  Couldn’t understand why Pa had married her.  She was so different from Inger.’

He stopped to see the effect his words were having on his little brother.  Joe was listening intently and the tears had ceased, although his cheeks were still wet and his eyes sorrowful.

‘Don’t tell Hoss I said this, but Inger was kinda homely.  I guess she was what I imagined a mother to be.  She worked hard, cooking and cleaning and she gave us lots of love.  I adored her.  Marie was from a different world.  She wore pretty clothes and perfume and left most of the housework to Hop Sing.  She sang and danced and did things that I thought were frivolous.  So when she had settled in and started to try to mother us, I resented it and we clashed.’  he grinned ‘Boy, did we have some arguments.’

He put his arm around his little brother ‘But when you came along, I saw what she was really like.  She was gentle and protective and she loved us all equally, I never felt left out and neither did Hoss.  She would have done anything for us and most of all she loved Pa and made him happy.’

Joe looked puzzled ‘What’s this to do with Ruth?’

‘I don’t know, maybe because I was wrong before, I could be wrong now.  Maybe we should give her the benefit of the doubt.  She and Pa obviously love each other.’

Joe watched his brother closely, he had never heard Adam openly admit that he might be wrong before.

Adam stretched out on the bed and put his hands behind his head ‘After all, someday we will get married and leave home, it’s not very fair of us to spoil things for Pa and then leave him alone.’

Joe nodded ‘I hadn’t thought of it like that.  But it’s ok for you and Hoss you’re old enough to leave.  I’m the one who has to stay.’

‘Well maybe if you give her a chance, you will get to like her.  If you don’t you can always put a few snakes around the place to scare her away.’  he grinned.

Joe gave him a sharp jab in the ribs ‘You said you came here to get me out of trouble, not into it.’  but he was smiling now.

Adam sat up suddenly serious again ‘Yeah, well I think both of us have a lot of apologising to do.  I’ll do my bit when Pa gets back and I’ll tell him I was responsible for your little speech.  Maybe he won’t be so angry with you.  I guess he’ll still make you apologise to Ruth, just make it convincing.’

Joe looked anxiously at his brother ‘Do you think that will be enough.  He was awful mad at me.’

Adam stood up and ruffled Joe’s hair ‘Let’s hope so, because he was even angrier with me.  It’s getting late so you had better get to bed, he won’t come up tonight, that’s for sure.’

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 11

 

 

Ben did not arrive back at the house until very late.  It had taken him a long time to calm Ruth and try to settle her fears.  Eventually she accepted his explanations and apologies and his promise to call for her the next day.  He had also promised that Joe would call on her on his way home from school, although she had said it wasn’t necessary.

When he got back to the ranch, the house appeared to be in darkness.  He put up the horse and buggy and quite expected to go straight to bed.  Talking to Adam would have to wait until morning, which was probably just as well, because he was still very angry.  He opened the door quietly and made his way across the room to the staircase.  He had reached the bottom step when he became aware of Adam watching him from his chair by the fire.

‘You needn’t have waited. We can talk in the morning.’  he said sharply.

Adam got slowly to his feet and adjusted the lamp which was burning low beside him.

‘I’d rather say what I have to say now, Sir.’

Ben looked intently at his eldest son,  it wasn’t often that Adam called him sir these days.

‘I rather thought that I was going to talk to you.’  Ben said acidly.

Adam nodded and looked at the floor.

‘I know, and I deserve everything you are going to say.  I lost my temper and my reason.  I was rude to both of you and I have no excuse.  It was my fault that Joe was insolent and not his.  I have been making remarks and I guess he picked up on them.  Please don’t be angry with him.’  he paused and looked at his father for a moment, but Ben’s face was impassive.  He cleared his throat, obviously embarrassed by his father s silence.

‘Like I said, I have no excuse and I apologise.  I will go into town tomorrow and apologise to Ruth, if she’ll let me.’

Ben turned from the stairs to face him, and said coldly  ‘Do you really think you can wipe out the damage you have done tonight with an apology?’

Adam shifted uneasily from one foot to the other ‘No, I guess not.  I talked to Joe, explained I was wrong.  I think he understands.’

Ben wanted so much to tell his son that he forgave him.  He knew that Adam found it very difficult to admit he was wrong and apologies came hard to him.  He could imagine what his talk with Joe and this speech had cost him.  However, he had no intention of letting him off the hook, just yet..

‘I hope you understand that Joe looks up to you as the eldest and you influence him more than you realise.  I will not tolerate the sort of behaviour I saw tonight. Regardless of what you think, Ruth is our guest and I expect you to treat her with respect.  If you can’t do that, then you have no place at my table. Do I make myself clear’

Adam hung his head for a moment, he felt about ten years old.  He looked up and met his father’s eyes.

‘Yes, sir.’  he said quietly.

‘It’s late, let’s get to bed.’  Ben started up the stairs.

‘Pa.’  Adam’s voice stopped him on the half landing.  ‘What about Joe, are you still angry with him?’

Ben nodded ‘Your apology does not excuse his behaviour one bit.’

 

Joe was awaken by Hoss as usual, and it was a few moments before he recalled the events of the night before.  When he did, it brought a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach.  He hoped that Adam had managed to talk to Pa, but whatever had happened he knew that breakfast was going to be a difficult meal.  He got up and dressed very slowly, trying to put off the inevitable confrontation.  He was about ready to go downstairs when his door opened and his father stood there, filling the doorway.

Ben very slowly and purposefully closed the door and stood looking at his youngest son.  He had his hands on his hips in the typical pose he took when he was angry and Joe’s eyes were drawn to his father’s brown leather belt.  Joe swallowed hard, he was certain his father was going to give him a tanning and he wished he would get it over with.

‘I hope you’ve had time to reconsider your behaviour of  last night?’  his voice was quiet and stern  ‘Do you have anything to say to me, before I decide what to do about it?’

Joe glanced quickly at him and then looked at his feet. ‘I’m sorry, sir.  I didn’t mean those things I said.  I’ll go and apologise to Mrs Walsh after school.’

Ben nodded ‘Yes, you will.  I am ashamed of you.  I thought I had taught you better manners.’

He hesitated for a moment, then sat down on Joe’s bed and indicated that Joe should join him.  For a second Joe felt his heart beat faster, he didn’t know what his father intended to do.

‘Why didn’t you tell me that you were worried things would change when Ruth came to live here?  I thought you liked her.’  his tone was calm.

Joe relaxed a little and cleared his throat.

‘You weren’t here to tell.  You were always with her.’  he said crossly.

‘She has a name.’ his father said sharply.

‘Well, Adam said ……..’

Ben held up his hand to stop him ‘I don’t want to know what Adam thinks.  It’s what you think that I’m interested in.  Of course things will change when Ruth and I are married, but they’ll change for the better.’  he put his arm around Joe’s shoulders and gave him a hug.  ‘Ruth isn’t trying to take the place of your mother, she can never do that.  But she does want to be your friend, can’t you give her a try.  Talk to Hoss, he and Ruth get on really well.  Will you try for me?’

Joe nodded ‘I’ll try Pa, I’m really sorry for what I said.’

Ben gave him another hug ‘I know you are.  I still want you to go and see Ruth at the hotel this afternoon and apologise.  Now how about some chores before school.’

Joe looked amazed ‘Aren’t you going to punish me?’  he asked.

Ben smiled ‘I ought to, but I have a feeling that your older brother had more than a little to do with it, so we’ll let it go this time.  That doesn’t mean that I will overlook that kind of behaviour in the future.’  he said sternly. ‘Is that understood.’

‘Yes, sir.’  was Joe’s relieved reply.

Ben turned to go, but paused at the doorway ‘Sheriff Coffee spoke to me in town yesterday.  He told me that he thought you were spending time with Travis Simmons.  I  told him I was sure that wasn’t true.’  he paused ‘Don’t prove me wrong, Joseph.’

Joe watched as his father went towards the stairs, he had never been so relieved in his life.  His heart had stopped when his father had mentioned Travis, quite expecting an inquisition to follow.  He knew that his father had believed the Sheriff and was giving him a second chance.  He felt very guilty and vowed that he would not let his father down again.  Joe always had good intentions it was just that he couldn’t always carry them out.

 

Around midday Adam harnessed up the buckboard and collected Hop Sing’s list, it was his turn to drive into town and he had several errands to run.  He was pleased that it gave him the opportunity to spend time away from the ranch, the atmosphere was frosty and he was finding it difficult to talk to his father.  Once in town, he left the buckboard at  Morton’s store with the list to be filled and went to deliver some mail to the Express office.  With more than an hour to fill, he decided to stop by the Silver Dollar for a beer and maybe catch up on some news.

‘Afternoon, Sam.  Give me a beer, please.’  he looked around at the few men seated at the tables and stopped as he saw who was sitting in on the poker game.  The two men Ruth had spoken to were there, deep in conversation.

‘Sam.’ he called to the bartender ‘Who are those two guys at the table with Jim

Wilson.’

The bartender continued to polish the glass he was holding.

‘The one with the checked shirt is Matt Tolliver from Carson City, don’t know the other fella, but he has been around a lot over the past few weeks, Tolliver too.  I guess most of the saloons in Carson have thrown him out, must need new pastures.’

‘What do you mean, Sam?’

‘Tolliver has reputation for losing money and getting drunk.  We’ve had no trouble here but I know Roy has his eye on him.  He’s usually in debt and trying to get someone else to buy the drinks, maybe the other fella is buying at the moment.’

Adam watched them for a few moments while he finished his beer, then thanking

Sam for the information, he headed off to talk to the Virginia City sheriff.

 

Adam had known Roy Coffee since he was a boy, he was one of his father’s best

friends.  A quiet unassuming man, who appeared mild mannered but any wrong doer who took that as a sign of weakness soon found out to their cost that it was not so.  He was relaxing in his office with a coffee preparing for what would be the usual long night.

‘Hello, Adam.  What brings you to the law on a nice peaceful day?’  he greeted Adam with a handshake.

‘Afternoon Roy.  I’m snooping and I know you have all the answers.’  Adam

grinned.

Roy returned the grin ‘Well as long as you’re not planning a bank robbery, I guess I can give out information.  What is it you want to know?’

Adam pulled up a chair and stretched his long legs out in front of him ‘Do you

know a Matt Tolliver from Carson City?’

Roy nodded ‘You’re not mixed up with him, I hope.’

‘Why do you say that?’

Roy leaned forward in his chair and sipped his coffee.

‘He’s no good.  A gambler and a petty thief.  He gets into fights now and again mostly ‘cos of his debts.  I haven’t had any trouble from him for a few months, but it will come.’

Adam looked thoughtful ‘Does he have a wife or sister or any family in Carson

City?’

Roy shook his head ‘Not that I know of, lives alone in a rented house on the

corner of Division Street.’

‘Does he now.’  mused Adam. ‘What about the friend he has with him?’

Roy sniffed ‘I’ve met him, introduced himself as Gideon Stone. I believe, from New England.  Don’t know the connection though.  He has been around for a while, gambling and drinking but there has been no trouble.’

Adam stood up ‘Thanks Roy.  I think I’ll have a talk to Mr Gideon Stone.’

Roy got to his feet and touched Adam’s arm ‘I want no trouble, Adam, whatever it is you let me handle it.’

‘I promise, no trouble Roy, unless he starts something.’

Roy watched Adam leave ‘Now what’s that all about?’  He had seen that stubborn look on Adam’s face before and it generally meant trouble.  Maybe he had better check up on Gideon Stone.

 

On leaving the sheriff’s office Adam slowly made his way to the hotel, this was a chore he was not looking forward to but he guessed he had better make amends with Ruth or he would not be able to face his father at supper.  He walked into the lobby and was surprised to meet Joe bent on the same errand.  Like his big brother Joe was reluctant to make the final journey up to Ruth’s room and he was delighted to have company.

‘Come on, let’s face this together.’  Adam sighed.

He ushered his young brother ahead of him up the staircase and tentatively knocked on the door indicated by the clerk.  It was opened quickly by a smiling Ruth, but her smile faded when she realised who was calling.  For a moment Adam thought she would shut the door again, but she recovered her composure and stood to one side.

‘Adam, Joe, won’t you come in.’

Adam took a deep breath and followed Ruth into the room with Joe trailing behind him.

‘We just came to apologise for last night, Ruth.  We were both way out of line and we are sorry that we upset you.’

Joe simply nodded his agreement.

‘I seem to remember you apologised at the dance, it’s obviously easy for you to say but not so easy to put into practice.’  she said sharply. ‘I’ve tried to understand you Adam, but I won’t stand by and watch you hurt your father the way you did last night.  I accept Joe’s apology, he was only following your lead.  But I think you should be trying to put things right with your father, not with me.’  She approached Adam and looked into his eyes, ‘I love your father and I want to make him happy, if that means I have to put up with you, then so be it, but you’re going to have to learn to put up with me too.’

Adam was taken aback by her firmness and for a moment he believed her. Then his  scepticism returned, he couldn t accept her story.

‘I’ll keep quiet for Pa’s sake, but I still think your meeting was just too much of a coincidence.’  he said softly.

Ruth turned away from him ‘I think you had better go, or your apology will be wasted yet again.’  she snapped.

 

Once safely back in the lobby, Joe questioned his brother.

‘What’s going on?  What were you talking about?’

‘Nothing to worry you.  You get on home, tell Pa I’ll be there shortly.’

‘Where are you going?’

‘Never you mind.’  Adam said as he pushed Joe through the double doors on to the boardwalk.

‘I wish you and Hoss would stop treating me like a kid.’  Joe grumbled.

Adam’s face relaxed into a grin ‘Maybe in ten years or so, we might.  Go on, get home.’

 

Adam watched Joe ride out of town and then returned to the Silver Dollar, but the men had left.  He cursed inwardly when he realised he would have to leave is quest until another day.  He had to get the supplies and get on home.  He didn’t want to antagonise  his father any further by being late for supper.

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 12

 

 

‘Hoss, where are you?’  Joe yelled.

Hoss kept quiet, he had finished all his chores and was enjoying the peace and quiet of the summer evening.  His hideaway was not far from the house, but if he was quiet he could watch without being seen.  He had had enough of conflict this week.  Pa and Adam were barely speaking and most evenings Adam had gone into town to see Katie or to spend his time in the Silver Dollar.  Hoss guessed that’s where he had gone tonight.  Ruth had spent some days at the ranch and Hoss had enjoyed her company, but when she was there Adam made himself scarce.

‘What are you doing way out here?’  Joe’s voice at his shoulder startled him.

Hoss grinned and stretched out on the grass ‘Trying to hide from noisy little brothers.’

Joe sank down beside him ‘It sure is quiet.’

Hoss sighed ‘Well, it was ’til you showed up.’

‘You goin’ into town?’  Joe asked pulling up a long stem of grass and chewing on it.

Hoss shook his head ‘Nope, Adam didn’t ask, and I don’t feel like going on my own.’

‘You could take me.’  Joe said hopefully.

Hoss gave a great guffaw of laughter.

‘Pa’d skin me alive, if I took you into town on a Friday night.  Maybe in a few years if you’re lucky.’

‘Why does everyone treat me like a kid?’  Joe moaned.

Hoss leaned over and tickled his little brother ‘Because you are.’

Joe retaliated and for a few moments they teased each other with light punches, until Hoss called halt, by holding both of Joe’s hands in one of his.

Joe shook himself free and looked quizzically at his older brother ‘Hoss…..’ he started.

Hoss grinned ‘Ok, what do you want?’

Joe looked shocked ‘Why should I want anything?’ he said innocently.

Hoss smiled ”Cos that’s your wheedling voice and it usually gets me into trouble.’

‘Well, I was wondering…….could you lend me five dollars?’  he said it quickly.

Hoss’s eyes narrowed ‘What do you want five dollars for?’

Joe had thought this out and hoped he had picked a good reason.

‘I just wanted to get something for Ruth to make up for being rude to her.’

He avoided Hoss’s eyes as he spoke and hoped his brother didn t notice that he was going red.  He hated lying to Hoss but he had to have that money by tomorrow and he could think of no other way to get it.  He dare not ask Adam or his father, they would question him too closely.

‘Hey, that’s a great idea, but where’s all your allowance?  Pa only gave it to you a couple of week’s back, you can’t have spent it already.’

‘I used it for those firecrackers.’  Joe lied again.

He felt terrible, he knew he was getting deeper and deeper into trouble, but he could think of no way out.  He had even considered taking the money from Adam’s room.  His eldest brother often left his wallet on his bureau, it would have been easy.  He now went cold at the very thought, how could he have let himself be forced into this awful situation.

‘Ok.’  Hoss agreed ‘But you pay me back at the end of the month when you get your next allowance.’

Joe sighed, relieved that it had been so easy.  He did not think ahead to next month. He would have found a way to deal with Travis by then, wouldn’t he?

 

Joe’s feeling of relief did not last long.  He finished his chores in record time on Saturday morning and told his father he was going to meet Mitch.  It wasn’t a lie, but it certainly bent the truth a little.  He was meeting Mitch, but not until the afternoon and he had led his father to believe that he was spending all day at the Devlin ranch.

Travis accosted him almost as soon as he rode into town.  He grabbed Joe as he was tying Cochise to the hitching rail outside the school.

‘Well, you got what you owe me, kid?’  Travis held his arm firmly as he spoke, his tone menacing.

Joe glanced around and saw that two of Travis’s band were not far away.  Suddenly, his fear was replaced by anger.  This could go on forever unless he stopped it.

‘You scared to face me on your own Trav?’  he sneered.  ‘I’m not paying you anymore.’

Travis laughed ‘Scotty, Pete,  I think our little friend needs a lesson before he pays up.’

Joe struggled but Travis held him fast and although he managed to punch his tormentor in the ribs it was not enough to get him to loosen his grip.  The other two boys sauntered over and took hold of Joe’s arms, no matter how he fought he could not get free.

Travis stood back and laughed.

‘You can’t win kid.  First I’m gonna teach you a lesson, then I’ll take the money, if you’ve got it, and if you haven’t well Scotty here will visit the sheriff with a bit of information.’

Travis then proceed to systematically give Joe a beating, while his two friends kept Joe from fighting back.  He was careful to avoid marking Joe’s face and made the blows tell on his ribs and stomach, until Joe collapsed.

‘He’s had enough Trav, leave him be.’  one of the boys said.

Travis bent down and searched Joe’s pockets, extracting the five dollars and grinning down at his victim.

‘You meet us back here next Saturday, same time, there’s no need to bring any money.  I’ve got a better job for you, now that you understand, I’m the boss. Don t be late or we might just have to ride out to the Ponderosa and ask your Pa to let you come out to play.’  he laughed as he and his friends walked away.

 

It took Joe sometime to get to his feet and even longer to make his way to meet Mitch.  His friend took one look at him and guessed what had happened.

‘Travis?’  he questioned.

Joe nodded.

Mitch helped him down from his horse and led him to the back of the barn.

‘You’d better not let my Pa see you like this or he’ll want to know what happened and unless I miss my guess, you’d rather your Pa didn’t know, right?’

Joe explained some of what had gone on in town but did not tell his friend the real reason for the beating.  He did not want to involve Mitch in anything that would bring him trouble too.

‘You have to tell someone, Joe.  He’s not going to stop.’  he looked questioningly at his young friend ‘What exactly has he got on you, that makes you so scared.’

As soon as he said it, Mitch knew he had picked the wrong word.

‘I’m not scared of him.’  Joe yelled.

‘Ok, Ok.  Maybe not of him, but you’re sure worried about him telling your Pa something.’   he regarded his friend with a worried frown ‘Why don’t you tell Hoss or Adam, if you can’t tell your Pa?’

‘I can’t.’  Joe retorted.

‘Why not. I’d sure tell Cal or Danny if I needed help.’

‘I just can’t.’  sighed Joe, totally defeated.

Suddenly the need to tell someone was overwhelming and he knew he could trust Mitch.

‘If I tell you, swear you won’t tell anyone.’  Joe’s face was serious.

Mitch nodded ‘You know I won’t.’

‘Swear.’  Joe insisted.

‘Ok, I swear.’  replied Mitch anxious to hear what his friend had to say.

Joe took a deep breath and launched into his story.

‘I took something from Morton’s store.’  he reached in his pocket and took out the jackknife, turning if over in his hand . ‘Travis said it was a game a sort of initiation into their gang.  If I took the knife and showed it to him, then put it back.  It would prove that I wasn’t scared.  I swear I never meant to keep it Mitch.’

Mitch’s face showed his shock at his friend’s confession.

‘Why  didn’t you put it back?’

Joe sighed ‘It was a trick.  Scotty Malloy was in the store and he really took something.  Mr Morton chased him and we all ran.  It was only when it was too late that I realised I still had the knife.  Travis meant it to happen that way, its how he gets kids to steal for him or to get him money.’

‘You’ve given him money?’  Mitch’s voice was rising higher at his friend’s stupidity.

‘About ten dollars altogether.’  Joe admitted.

Mitch gave a low whistle.  ‘I can see why you don’t want your Pa to know.  I mean however you look at it, that’s got to be stealing.’

Joe nodded distractedly ‘…and I’ve been telling lies to cover it up.  I don’t know what to do.’

‘I can’t see any other way out than telling your Pa.  Travis will keep on blackmailing you unless you call his bluff and the only way to do that is to tell your Pa as soon as possible.  Maybe he won’t be too hard on you if you tell him the truth, like you just told me.’

Joe shook his head ‘He’d skin me alive, but that’s not what I’m worried about.’

Mitch looked mystified, the prospect of a tanning from Mr Cartwright would sure worry him. ‘What is then?’

‘He’d be so ashamed of me.  He sets such store by honesty and truthfulness.  How can I tell him that I lied and I stole.’  Joe sank down beside the barn and put his head in his hands.

Mitch patted his friend on the back, self consciously.

‘We’ll think of something Joe.’  he said quietly, not knowing what else to say.

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 13

 

 

‘Hello, Hoss.  Is your father in the house?’  Ruth called as she drove the buggy into the yard a little after three.

‘Yeah, he’s waiting to take you up to see the new horses we brought in.’  Hoss called back.

‘I’ll go in.’  she said as she climbed from the buggy.

‘No need for that, I’m ready to leave.’  Ben was standing in the doorway buckling on his gun.  He went forward and gave Ruth a light kiss on the cheek.  ‘You look lovelier than ever this afternoon.’

Ruth blushed and took his arm ‘I’m looking forward to seeing these horses.  Hoss told me all about them yesterday.’

Ben laughed ‘He’s talked of nothing else since we brought them in.  We’ll be back in time for supper.’  he shouted back at Hoss as he took up the reins and drove the buggy out of the yard.

 

Adam came out of the barn wiping his hands on a cloth ‘The happy couple off out again I see.’ he said sarcastically.

‘Pa does his share, he’s been working on the accounts all morning.  I’d just as soon be out here than doing that.’  Hoss retorted.

‘Yeah, well you don’t have the head for figures.  You’re better at splitting logs.’  Adam indicated the large pile beside his brother.  ‘Why don’t we take a leaf out of Pa’s book and go fishing.’

Hoss looked at his brother suspiciously.  Adam never suggested shirking chores.

‘You feeling Ok?’ he asked.

Adam grinned ‘Feel fine.  I’m just tired of running this place while Pa goes off with Ruth all the time.  I figure we’re owed some time off.’

‘Well, if you say so.  You can explain to Pa, you’re the eldest.’  Hoss grinned back.

‘How come you and Joe only remember that when someone has to take the blame and not when I’m giving orders.’  he laughed.

‘Easy, you’re always giving orders, we only need a big brother to cover for us now and then.’  Hoss cleaned the axe and returned it to the barn.

‘We can get in a couple of hours fishing, be back before Pa.’  Adam said decisively as he saddled up Sport.

Hoss shook his head ‘I haven’t seen you like this since we were kids.  Even then it took wild horses to drag you away, if we were supposed to be doing chores.’

Adam smiled ‘Well I figure Joe has been getting away with it for years, I’m going to have my turn now.’

‘Well don’t let me stop you.  I’m all for playing truant once in a while, as long as I’m not held responsible.’  Hoss led Chub from the barn and gathered up the fishing poles.  Adam swung into the saddle ‘Don’t worry, it would be difficult for Pa to get any more cross with me than he is already.’

The two of them headed off towards the lake without a backward glance to enjoy the summer sun.

 

A few miles away Ben was showing his newly acquired herd of wild horses to Ruth.  He explained his plans to break the horses for sale to the army and together they discussed the finer points of the animals in the corral.  Ben reflected that it felt good to be able to share his dreams again.  He had always included the boys in his plans for the future but it was somehow different sharing things with Ruth.  It was not until they were on their way back to the house that Ruth mentioned Adam’s visit.

‘I forgot to tell you that Adam and Joe came to the hotel on Monday to apologise.’ she told him.  ‘I’m afraid I wasn’t as sympathetic and forgiving with Adam as I might have been.’

Ben shrugged ‘Once Adam gets an idea in his head it can take an awful lot to shift it.  I think the best thing to do is try to ignore his mood until he feels he can back down without losing face.  It will happen eventually, you’ll win him over just as you have with Hoss.’

Ruth smiled ‘It would be difficult not to get on with Hoss, he is so friendly and easy going.  I think Adam is going to be a little more difficult to convince.’  she gave a shake of her head ‘At the moment its Joe I want to get close to, he was obviously anxious and hurt the other evening.  I hate to think of us being happy at his expense.’

The buggy drew into the yard and Ben put up the reins and took her in his arms.             ‘Joe will be alright, we had a talk and I’m sure he understands that although things may change, it will only be for the better.’

He climbed down and helped Ruth to the ground.

‘I wonder where everyone is?’  he glanced around the yard.  ‘You go into the house, I’ll just check up on the chores and then I’ll join you.’

He wandered into the barn his eyes taking in the tools left lying on the floor where Adam had been mending harness.  Only Buck stood in his stall, the others were empty.  He went over and gave the horse an affectionate pat. ‘Now where have they gone?’ he asked but Buck just snorted and nuzzled him in the hope that his master might have some treat.

As he went to leave the barn, he bumped into Joe leading Cochise across the yard.

‘Oh, Hi Pa, your back early.’  Joe was late as usual and had hoped that his father was still out with Ruth as he was most days.

‘Hello, son.  Have you seen Adam or Hoss?’

Joe shook his head ‘Nope, didn’t see anyone on the road home.’  he was relieved that his father seemed too preoccupied to notice that he had been kept after school again.

‘Slip up to the house with your books and tell Ruth that I’m starting the chores and will be in later, will you?’

‘Sure, Pa.  I’ll be back to help in a minute.’

While Joe was gone,  Ben unsaddled Cochise and rubbed her down and then looked after Sandy.  They finished all the chores together and there was still no sign of Adam or Hoss.  Joe worked and watched his father getting angrier at each extra job he had to do.  By the time they had finished and washed, Hop Sing was serving up supper.

Ruth brought in the plates and smiled at Ben when he raised his eyebrows.

‘I’m finding my way around Hop Sing’s kitchen with his permission.  If I behave myself he might even let me cook one day.’

Joe grinned ‘He must like you a lot, no one gets to use his kitchen.’

She smiled back at him ‘At last I’m doing something right.’

Joe blushed ‘Lots of things I guess.  It just takes us a while to get used to it.’

Ruth caught Ben’s questioning look and she nodded.  She and Joe were getting on better, even if his acceptance of her was still a little grudging.

Ben had just finished saying a blessing when the door opened and Adam and Hoss came in.  They were laughing and joking and Hoss slammed the door behind them with enough force to make the frame rattle.

Ben got to his feet and glared at them both.

‘Where have you been?’  he asked, his voice low and quiet.

Adam shrugged ‘We went fishing, caught some nice trout too.’  he pulled out a chair totally unconcerned.

Hoss looked a little more worried, he recognised the tone of his father’s voice as one that usually preceded a lecture.  He wasn’t sure whether to sit down or remaining standing and dithered beside his chair with one eye on his father and one on Adam.

‘Just who did you think was going to do the chores this evening?’  Ben’s tone was sarcastic.

Again Adam ignored the tone ‘We figured, we’d done our share, so we decided to take the afternoon off.  Let someone else worry about the place for a change.’  he glanced at his father out of the corner of his eye.

He was deliberately trying to provoke an argument and Ben knew it and had no intention of giving him that satisfaction, so he changed tactics.

‘We decided?  You were in complete agreement with this were you Hoss?’

Hoss looked uncomfortable, not knowing how to answer, but Adam came to his rescue.

‘I guess I decided. Hoss just came along when I told him to.  After all I was left in charge again.’  he leaned back in his chair and met his father’s stare with an insolent smile.

Ben felt an overwhelming urge to hit him, but that would be exactly what he wanted.  He controlled his temper with difficulty and sat down, indicating that Hoss should do the same.  Joe watched in silent fascination, he had never seen a battle like this one between Adam and Pa.

‘We’ll talk about this later, Ruth is our guest and we are neglecting her.’  he said quietly.  Taking up a plate to serve himself with the roast beef.

‘Guest?  I thought she was part of the family, she certainly spends enough time here. I can’t see how she is neglected.’

Ben’s face went white with anger ‘Leave this table.’ he put down his plate and banged his fist down making the crockery rattle.

Ruth sat tense and unhappy beside him and Hoss reached out and touched her hand reassuringly, although he had no idea how to help the situation.  Adam had gone too far this time.

Adam got slowly to his feet and dropped his napkin on to the table ‘Why don’t you ask her about her friends the Tollivers, or was it just Matt Tolliver that you stayed with?’

Ruth’s sharp intake of breath told Adam that he had hit a sore spot.

Ben got to his feet and started to move around the table towards his son, but Ruth caught his arm.

‘Please Ben, leave it.’  she begged.

Adam sneered ‘Yeah, let’s not look too closely, we might find out too much.’

‘Get out and don’t come back until you are ready to apologise.’  Ben was no longer in control of his temper and he feared that if Adam did not leave immediately they would come to blows.

Adam nodded ‘I’m going,  he said sharply  Do you mind if I collect a few things?  I’d rather not come back.’  he didn’t wait for an answer but strode across the room to the stairs.

‘Ben, please stop him. Don’t let him leave like this.’  Ruth’s voice was pleading but in her heart she knew it was useless.  She could tell by the set of Ben’s jaw that he had no intention of backing down.

‘Maybe a few days on his own will make him come to his senses.’  Ben snapped.

He returned to his seat and continued to dish up his meal.  Hoss and Joe exchanged glances, they both knew that Adam was as stubborn as their father and neither was about to given in.  They ate in silence, Ruth glancing from one to the other trying to judge what to say.

 

Upstairs, Adam stuffed clothes and personal belongings into a carpet bag, heedless of what he took.  He was angry and upset.  He only paused when he reached out for his mother’s picture from his bureau.  Her face smiling up at him made him stop and think.  He knew  had gone too far tonight, he should have waited until he had facts.  He had deliberately provoked the confrontation and he wasn’t sure what he had expected to achieve.  He had known that his father would not take his side against Ruth, it had been a totally useless gesture which had resulted in a rift that would be hard to put right.  He smiled to himself, it was a gesture more typical of his youngest brother and he was always telling Joe not to confront problems that way.    Well it was done now there was no going back, he would have to live with it and face the consequences,  but he would get those facts.  He would prove to his father that he was right.  He regretted his action but only one aspect really worried him, because he had argued against his father, Joe would be left to fend for himself.  He hoped that whatever was troubling his little brother would sort itself out soon.  He finished his packing and gathered up the bag and his saddle bags and made his way down the stairs.  He glanced across at the table, his eyes met Hoss s accusing stare, but his father did not even look up.  He paused for just a second then shrugged his shoulders and went out into the night.

 

Inside the house the atmosphere was charged with emotion.  Ben was still angry and Ruth felt it was all her fault.  Hoss and Joe knew their father well enough not to say anything when he was in this frame of mind.  No one felt much like eating and eventually, Ruth asked Ben to get one of the  ranch hands to drive her back to town.

‘I’ll take you myself.’  he said sharply.

‘No, it’s better you stay here with the boys.  I’ll be fine.’

He nodded ‘If that’s what you want.’ he said gruffly as he walked her out into the yard. ‘Please don’t let this upset you.  Adam is stubborn, he’ll cool off.’

She shook her head ‘I think it’s more than stubbornness.  I am tearing your family apart and I never meant to do that.  Maybe we should wait a while before we get married.’

Ben put his hand to her lips ‘It’s not your fault.  I won’t let him come between us.  He will have to accept that.’

‘And if he doesn’t?’  she questioned.

‘He will, just give him time.’  he leaned forward and kissed her.  ‘Nothing is going to change the way we feel about each other.’

He took her in his arms again and this time he held her close and kissed her neck, her hair, her cheek and finally a lingering kiss that left her breathless and wanting him so much that she forgot the past and saw only a future with him.

‘Do you believe that it will all be alright, now?’  he asked.

‘Oh yes.’ she breathed softly.

‘Then I will see you tomorrow and I want no more talk of waiting or changing your mind.  We are getting married in two weeks and two days and that’s final.’

 

It was very late but Ben poured another cup of coffee, he couldn’t sleep. Joe had gone to bed soon after Ruth left and when Ben went up to say goodnight, he had turned his face to the wall and refused to talk.  Hoss had made a few half hearted attempts at conversation but he was too shocked at his brother’s departure to have much to say.

The events of the evening had left Ben drained and weary. He wandered around the room, his mind full of unrelated thoughts and pictures.  What was happening to this family?  Adam was gone, who knew where.  Joe only spoke in sharp short sentences and seemed preoccupied with a problem that he would not share with anyone.  Only Hoss talked to him and even he had changed, his relationship with his older brother was strained and they rarely spoke.

He sat down heavily in the chair at his desk and put his head in his hands.  How had he let this happen.  There had been many occasions while the boys were growing up, when he hadn’t known how to deal with a problem, it was not easy bringing up three boys alone, but always a solution had presented itself.  He tried to recall how he had solved them before, but images of his sons kept getting in the way.  He remembered birthdays, days spent fishing, teaching them to swim in the lake, even their first steps and their childhood illnesses.  Always he had talked his problems through in his mind with their mothers, why couldn’t he do that this time?  He knew the answer, Ruth.  He had created this problem and it was not one that was easy to share.

He reached into the drawer of his desk and withdrew Marie’s picture. It seemed only yesterday that she had been here with him, his visit to the waterfall had brought back so many memories.  He began to think of  Little Joe.  Something was bothering his youngest son and had been for some time.  Was Roy right?  Was Joe mixed up with Travis Simmons?  Ben didn’t want to think so.  Joe knew how he felt about the Simmons family, maybe that was it, he was worried that his father would find out.  There was a sinking feeling in his stomach as he thought of the things that the Simmons family had been involved in.  If Joe was indeed mixed up with them, he could be heading for real trouble.  He decided to tackle Joe at the first opportunity and to insist on knowing what was bothering him.  Having met with some success in his quest by holding one picture, he decided to try the other.

Liz’s face smiled up at him, he lifted the frame gently and thought of Adam.  She had never known her son, only held him for a few moments.  Could talking to a picture really give him the answer.  If he was honest with himself he knew the answer already.  Adam had been grown up all his life, his childhood had been filled with tragedy and as a result he never allowed anyone to get close to him. Ben knew that after Elizabeth’s death he had not been a good father, he had been too wrapped up in his own sorrow to pay attention to a small boy.  Adam had become self sufficient and introspective.  If Inger had lived that might have changed, but her death had reinforced the wall which his eldest son had built around himself.  He never let anyone break through that shell if he could help it, in case he lost them too.  That had been his problem with Marie, it had eventually been solved only for him to lose her too.   Ben reflected that he had been too distraught to know what was happening for many months.  Again Adam had been the one to pick up the pieces for his brothers and stitch the family back together.

Ben suspected that apart from himself, only Hoss and Joe knew the real Adam.  He would shout at them and give them orders to cover his love for them, but both Hoss and Joe turn to him to solve their problems as often as they turned to their father.  At the moment he wondered if even he knew what really went on behind the mask Adam wore.

He fingered the gold frame and thought of Ruth, there was something about her that he could not fathom, a mystery waiting to be unravelled or as Adam thought a past that she did not want revealed.  He almost dropped the picture in surprise, the thought had been sub-conscious, he had never doubted her before, why now?  His fingers explored a dent in the back of the frame where the gold was uneven.  He turned the frame over, there was a small irregularity in the gold which he had never noticed before.  He shook his head it was too ridiculous, why should an unexplained dent in a picture frame make him think of the unexplained things in Ruth’s background.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 14

 

 

‘Give me a whisky, Sam.’  Adam leaned on the bar of the Silver Dollar, not really aware of his surroundings.  He had ridden in to town with no clear idea of what he was going to do and this had been his first stop, he needed a drink.

Sam slid the whisky glass along to him and Adam reached out and took the bottle. ‘You might as well leave that, I’m sure I can manage more than one tonight.’

Sam shrugged and moved along the bar, it was unusual for Adam to be drinking alone in the middle of the week and even more unusual for him to order whisky.   He watched as Adam took the bottle to a corner table and began to drink his way steadily down the bottle.  He beckoned to a dark haired girl wearing a low cut green satin dress.            ‘Angie, see if you can get Adam Cartwright to talk, he looks like he could use a sympathetic ear.’

‘Sure, Sam.  If you think it’s a good idea, he usually don’t mix with my sort.  Too high and mighty for the likes of me.’  Angie picked up another glass and wandered over to Adam’s table.

‘Mind if I join you, I could use a drink.’  she said casually, quite expecting him to tell her to go away as he usually did when one of the girls approached him.

‘Suit yourself, the bottle’s on the table.  I’m not much company tonight.’  he spoke without looking up and Angie wondered if he even knew she was there.

As the evening progressed Sam watched them,  Adam was getting steadily drunk, but at least now he was talking to Angie and not causing any trouble, which had been Sam s worry.  It was well after midnight when Adam got to his feet, the bar was almost empty and as he went to walk to the door, the room seemed to swim, he shook his head to clear it, but it made no difference.

‘I guess I’d better find a hotel.’  he muttered, his speech slurred and difficult to understand.

Angie gave a short laugh ‘What hotel do you think is going to take you in this state.’

She helped him negotiate the tables and leant him against the door frame while she collected her cloak.

‘Come on, you can stay at my place.  I promise I won’t tell anyone.’  she giggled.

Adam nodded, happy to have someone take the decision out of his hands.  He allowed himself to be led along C street to the corner and then down the steep slope.

‘Well here we are.’  Angie propped him up against a wall, while she opened the door to a small white painted cabin.  ‘You’d better come inside before somebody recognises you.’  she grinned.

He was vaguely aware that the cabins on either side had red lights burning in the windows, so he guessed he was on D street, but his head was muzzy and nothing made sense.  He really didn’t care who saw him.  Once inside he sank on to the bed.

‘I’ll make us some coffee.’  she sighed.

A few minutes later she came back into the room and laughed softly to herself.

‘Just my luck, I pick up the richest guy in town and he falls asleep on me.’

She debated taking money from his wallet, but that was short term thinking.  Angie was ambitious and she had long term plans.

 

Joe wandered into the International Hotel at around four the next day and went up to the desk.

‘Hello, Mr Madigan.  Is my brother Adam staying here?’   he asked.

‘Why hello, Joe.  Yes, he’s here. He registered this morning.  Room 12.’  he checked the keys behind him ‘I didn’t see him come back this afternoon but his key’s gone so he must be in.’

Joe bounded up the stairs, two at a time, rapped on the door and opened it without waiting for an answer.  He stood with one hand on the door knob and the other on the frame,  wishing he had waited.  His older brother was lounging on the bed with a bottle of whisky in one hand and a girl in the other.  Both looked startled at the intrusion.

Adam got slowly and unsteadily to his feet disentangling himself from Angie as he did so.

‘What are you doing here?’  he snapped.

Joe shrugged uncertainly ‘I’m sorry, I just wanted to talk to you.’ he muttered, staring hard at the girl.  She was wearing a red satin dress trimmed with lace,  the waist tight and the neckline low.  Several layers of black lace petticoat were showing beneath the raised hemline and her cape and shoes were on the floor. She met Joe’s gaze with a frank stare and the hint of a smile.

Adam had been drinking but he was not too drunk to realise just how sordid this scene must look to his younger brother and he was embarrassed and ashamed at his discovery.

‘It’s Ok, Angie’s just leaving.’  he said pointedly.

Angie gave a cynical laugh,  Oh am I? I thought I had only just arrived.  She got to her feet, sliding them into the pointed shoes, picked up her cape and swinging it around her shoulders, she made for the door.

‘I’ll see you later in the Silver Dollar.’  she said as she pushed past Joe into the hallway.

Joe stepped back to allow her to pass and watched with interest as she went down the staircase.

Adam didn’t answer her, he sank down on to the bed and put his head in his hands.

‘Well since you’re here, you’d better come in and close the door.’  he pushed his hair out of his eyes and glanced up at Joe.

‘Not quite the big brother you’re used to is it?’

Joe looked troubled ‘I’m really sorry, Mr Madigan didn’t say there was anyone else here.  I guess I should’ve…….’

Adam waved away his apology ‘Forget it, I’m the one who should apologise.  I’ve had rather too much to drink.’

He got up and splashed water from a basin on to his face.    ‘What did you want to talk to me about?’

Joe hesitated ‘Well,…. it was about last night.  You are coming home again, aren’t you?’

Adam caught hold of his little brother’s arms and held him so that he could look directly at him. ‘I don’t know…..I can’t while Ruth is there.  Do you understand?’

Joe shook his head ‘No, not really.’

Adam released him and sighed ‘No, I guess I don’t either.  I don’t seem to be in control of what I’m saying or doing.  I just know that Ruth is hiding something and its gonna hurt Pa and I can’t make him see.  I’ve never fallen out with him like this before and I don’t know what to do.’

Joe watched his brother struggling with different emotions, he had never seen him like this before and it frightened him.  Adam was always so sure of himself.  He sat down on the bed and played with an empty whisky glass.

‘Is that why you are drinking and why that girl was here?’  Joe said quietly.

Adam looked away embarrassed ‘Yeah, I guess so.  Look, about Angie….’ he broke off unsure what to say.

Joe grinned ‘I’m fourteen not four.  You don’t have to explain, I shouldn’t have barged in.’

Adam smiled ‘How about we go and get you a meal and me some coffee.  We can have a proper talk.’ he paused ‘What about Pa? He ll be mad if you are late home.’

‘No problem, he and Ruth are out to dinner somewhere, he won’t be home ’til late and I told Hoss I was going to visit you.’

‘I’ll bet that went down well.’  Adam said ruefully, as he cleared away the bottle and glasses and opened the door for his brother to go ahead of him.

‘That’s not fair, Adam.  Hoss just likes Ruth a lot, he always sees the good in people.’

Adam smiled, he had never realised how mature Joe could be.  The relationship between oldest and youngest was changing to one of mutual support.  They went down the stairs and Adam reached out and put his arm around his brother affectionately.

 

Adam took Joe to a small restaurant and watched while his young brother demolished a fair sized steak, followed by apple pie.  Adam simply had several cups of black coffee, he couldn’t face any food until he felt better.

‘You’re getting as bad as Hoss.  My wallet won’t stand many meals like that until I get myself a job.’

Joe looked up at his brother with a worried expression ‘But I thought you were coming back home.’

‘I don’t think I have that option at the moment Little Joe.  Pa told me to leave until I was ready to apologise, I’m sure not going to do that.  So I guess I start looking for work around town.  Don’t worry I’ll be here if you need me.’  he grinned ‘Next time I’ll try to be sober.’

Joe laughed ‘……and next time I’ll knock.’

Adam reached out and ruffled Joe’s hair, ‘Thanks, I’d appreciate that.’

‘Joe…..’  he hesitated not sure how to word his request ‘….I’d also appreciate it if you didn’t…….well…..mention Angie, to Pa or Hoss.’

Joe was quietly proud of the fact that for once the roles were reversed. ‘Course not.’ he replied quickly.

‘Hello, boys.’ a voice said at Adam’s shoulder  ‘I’ve been looking for you, Adam.’

They both looked up to find Roy Coffee standing beside them.

‘Something wrong Roy?’  Adam asked, concerned.

‘Not exactly, I found something might interest you about that fella with Matt Tolliver.’  Roy drawled.

Adam immediately sat up, fully alert.  ‘What’s that?’

‘Come over to my office and I’ll show you.’  Roy replied.

Adam reached for his wallet, peeled off some notes which he left on the table and got to his feet to follow the sheriff.  Joe trailed along behind, anxious not to be left out.

 

In Roy’s office, they gathered around the desk and Roy took out a sheaf of wanted posters.  ‘Here, this is him.’

Adam took the poster and having checked that the picture was definitely Gideon Stone read the words under it.  A reward of five hundred dollars was offered for his arrest, he was wanted for fraud and robbery in California.  But it wasn’t any of this that caught Adam’s eye and made him freeze speechless, the poster wasn’t for a Gideon Stone precisely.  It read quite clearly Wanted Gideon Stoddard alias Gideon Stone.

Joe was trying to read beside him and saw the same words.

‘What does it mean, Adam?’

Adam recovered his speech ‘I don’t know, but I’m sure gonna find out.’  he turned to Roy ‘Are you going to arrest him?’

Roy nodded ‘If he comes back into town, but I haven’t seen him for a few days.  I’ll notify the sheriff  in Carson City.’

Adam looked thoughtful ‘Do me a favour Roy, hold off as long as you can.  There is something I need to find out before you arrest him.’

‘I can’t let him walk free, now that I know he’s wanted in California.’  Roy complained.

‘He’s not wanted here, is he?’

‘Well, no.  But…..’

‘Please Roy, just a few days.’  Adam begged. ‘I need some time.  I think he has an accomplice but I want to be sure.  I just need time to send a telegram.’

‘Alright, Adam but I can’t promise anything.’

Adam left the office with Joe hot on his heels.

‘What are you going to do?’  Joe asked as he followed his brother across the street to the telegraph office.

At the door of the office, Adam paused and caught hold of Joe by the shoulders.

‘Listen, I want you to promise that you won’t tell Pa or Ruth any of this, understand.’  his voice was hard and stern and Joe was puzzled.

‘No I don’t understand.  What’s this guy got to do with Ruth?’  he asked.

‘I’m not sure, that’s what I’m going to find out.  But I don’t want anyone to know until I have all the facts.  Promise.’  he insisted.

‘Ok, I promise.  But I still don’t understand.’  he shrugged off Adam’s hands.

Adam went into the office and took a slip to write his message.  ‘I’m going to send a telegraph to my grandfather in Boston, I think he might be able to solve the mystery.’

He wrote quickly and handed it to the clerk, please send this as soon as possible, he placed some notes on the counter and the clerk checked the message and gave him the change.

Immediately, they left the office, the clerk began to send ‘To Captain Abel Morgan Stoddard, Boston……’

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 15

 

 

Adam had no idea how long it would take to get a reply to his telegram and in the meantime he needed to eat and to pay a hotel bill.  He asked around town but most of the business men were friends of his father and were anxious not to offend him by employing Adam until they knew the lie of the land.  He checked his bank account and decided that he would give it a week, if nothing had happened by then he would have to move out of the hotel and look for work away from Virginia City.

Two days without gainful employment and with no contact with his family seemed like two months.  He was not a man who enjoyed being idle and he was frustrated that he heard no word from his grandfather.  He regretted his hasty flight from the Ponderosa, all his books had been left behind and he hadn’t even remembered his guitar to keep him company.  As a result of  his boredom, he found himself spending far too much time with Angie, who was only to happy to entertain him and spend what money he had.

Joe had promised to visit on Saturday afternoon and Adam made a point of avoiding Angie and shutting himself in his room.  He planned to suggest that the two of them went for a ride up to the Lake.  He missed the Ponderosa and at least this way he would still feel that he was a part of it.  He had just settled down to await his young brother when a commotion in the street, drew him to the window.  People were running toward the livery stable, but from his room, he could not see why.  He went down the stairs and out into the street and then he saw the smoke.  By the time he reached the stables, flames were consuming the roof and the Fire Chief was directing operations to bring the fire under control.

‘Is anyone in there?’  he asked a bystander anxiously.

‘No, Charlie got out and got the horses out too.’  the cowboy replied.

Roy Coffee was talking to Charlie, the livery stable owner, and Adam went over to join them.

‘How did it happen Charlie?’

The stable owner grimaced ‘Boys.’  he said shortly ‘Saw a couple of ’em with firecrackers, throwing them around the street, one must have got on to the straw.’

Roy shook his head ‘Can’t understand how a firecracker could do so much damage, Charlie.  You sure you didn’t have anything in there that would cause it to burn like this.’

‘Nuthin’, Roy.  It must have been the straw.’  Charlie was adamant.

Roy looked up at the arrival of his deputy ‘Did you find something Clem?’

Clem nodded ‘Someone recognised one of the kids,  it was young Pete Jordan.’

Roy considered for a moment ‘You’d better pick him up, Clem.  Anything on the other one?’

Clem made a face ‘Well, someone said he was small and dark, wearing a grey jacket but that’s not much to go on.  Maybe young Jordan will tell us the rest.’

Charlie grunted ‘I thought Travis Simmons might be involved, but he sure ain’t small and dark.’

Roy picked up on the comment ‘Why Simmons, Charlie?’

Charlie sniffed ‘He worked for me ’til last Saturday, gave him the sack when I caught him stealing from me.’ he paused and sniffed again ‘Roy, can you smell coal oil?’

All of them sniffed the air.  ‘I sure can, Charlie.’  Roy said  ‘That fire was no accident with a firecracker, it was deliberate, that’s why it was so fierce.  I think we’d better have a talk with Mr Simmons.’

Adam watched them walk away and stayed long enough to see the flames extinguished, then he strolled back to the hotel to wait for Joe.   As he went through the lobby, Tom Madigan called out to him.

‘Your brother’s waiting for you, I let him in to your room, I hope that was Ok?’

‘Thanks Tom.’  he called back as he took the stairs two at a time.

He opened the door to his room and was surprised to see that Joe was sitting on the bed with his head in his hands.

‘Hi, sorry I was out.  Did you see the fire?’  he said cheerfully.

Joe did not look up ‘Yeah, I saw it.’  he said quietly.

Adam looked puzzled ‘What’s wrong?  No one was hurt and the horses are Ok, so nothing to worry about.  Although I guess Charlie is going to have a big repair bill.’

Joe looked up at his older brother and Adam was shocked to see the expression of fear on his face.

‘I started it.’  he spoke so softly that Adam wasn’t sure he had heard correctly.

‘You what?’  Adam’s voice was equally soft and full of disbelief.

Joe’s voice shook and came out almost as a sob ‘I started it.’ he repeated.

Adam sank down on to the bed beside his brother.  For a moment he could think of nothing to say.  He caught Joe by the shoulders and turned his brother to face him.

‘Explain yourself.’ he snapped ‘What do you mean you started it?’

Joe tried to look away, but Adam wouldn’t let him. ‘Answer me.’  he said fiercely.

Joe took a deep breath ‘Travis made me do it.  He got Scotty to spread coal oil around and told Pete and me to throw firecrackers into the straw.’  he hesitated ‘I didn’t know about the coal oil until afterwards, I thought it was just supposed to scare Charlie.’  he looked at his brother ‘I never meant to start a fire, honest Adam.’ his voice was pleading and he was near to tears.

Adam shook him roughly ‘Why?’ he demanded.

‘Travis made me do it.’ he repeated with a catch in his voice.

Adam gave him an exasperated shake ‘No one can make you do something you know is wrong unless you let them.  Did he threaten you or hurt you?’

Joe nodded ‘Sort of.  He…. he said if I didn’t do what he wanted he’d tell Pa……. that I stole something.’

Adam couldn’t believe he was hearing right.  He knew Joe had a talent for attracting trouble, but stealing.  Their father had brought them all up to be honest and truthful above all else.  Surely, Joe had not stepped that far out of line.  He took a deep breath                          ‘And did you?’  he asked.

Joe nodded again, not able to speak or meet his brother’s incredulous look.

Suddenly light dawned and Adam sighed ‘The pocket knife, right?’  he took Joe’s slight movement to indicate that he had guessed correctly.

‘What on earth were you thinking of and why didn’t you tell me when I found it?’  he asked.

Slowly and painfully Joe explained the events leading up to the fire.  Adam listened with a growing sense of  horror, as he heard of the theft and how Joe had been paying blackmail money to Simmons for several weeks.  How on earth was he going to get his little brother out of this.  He was angry with Joe, but he was more angry with himself for not seeing what was happening and putting a stop to it before it went this far.

Finally Joe stopped speaking and stared at the floor ‘What am I going to do?’  he asked quietly.

Adam took a deep breath ‘First we are going to see Sheriff Coffee and you can repeat all of this to him.’  he sighed  ‘I don’t know what that will mean, but maybe if you explain about Travis, he won’t be too hard on you.’

Joe nodded, he was scared of telling the sheriff, but he also felt an overwhelming sense of relief that Adam was taking charge. He wished he had told his brother from the start then maybe none of this would have happened.  He got to his feet and glanced up at his brother who had wandered over to the window.

‘I guess he will tell Pa.’  he said very quietly.

Adam turned around and looked at Joe’s white face, ‘Don’t you think it would be better if you told him yourself?’

Joe shook his head ‘I can’t.’  telling Pa would be all his nightmares come true.

Adam put his arm around his little brother ‘Come on, one thing at a time.  Let’s go and see Roy, we can decide what do about Pa. later.’

 

With Adam’s support, Joe haltingly told his story to the Virginia City Sheriff.  As he spoke, Roy nodded, he had suspected that Joe was in deeper with Simmons than Ben had allowed and this confession merely confirmed his suspicions.  When Joe had finished and was standing white face and scared beside his brother,  Roy sent his deputy off to find the other boys that Joe had implicated.  Joe had been reluctant to name his accomplices but Adam had insisted that he tell the whole truth this time.  Adam had also explained to Roy, why he thought Joe had got so involved with the Simmons gang.

‘What happens now, Roy?’  Adam asked.

Roy looked hard at Joe ‘Are you prepared to repeat everything you’ve told me in front of a judge?’

Joe glanced at his brother and then nodded ‘Yes, sir.’  he was very scared but Adam had made it quite clear on the short walk to the office that he had to own up and face whatever was coming.

‘Well, as far as the fire is concerned, I guess I can let him go home for now, provided you give me your word he will turn up in court on Monday.  He can be released in your custody or rather your father’s.  The theft is different.  It hasn’t been reported by Mr Morton, so it’s up to him whether he presses charges.  I suggest you go over there and talk to him.’  he gave Joe a sympathetic smile ‘If you return the knife and apologise, maybe he will be lenient with you.’

Adam cleared his throat ‘….and if he decides to go ahead anyway?’

Joe’s heart stopped for a moment, why did Adam have to say that?

The sheriff shrugged ‘Joe would be arrested for theft and would have to appear in court.  I guess as a first offence he would be fined or the judge would ask your father to guarantee a punishment and his good behaviour in the future.’

Joe listened, he didn’t really care what the court would do, it was facing his father that he was dreading.

‘Thanks Roy, we will go over and speak to Mr Morton now and return the knife.’ he glanced at Joe’s anxious face ‘Would you mind if Joe told Pa himself.  I give you my word that he will go straight home and do that.’

Roy nodded ‘Yeah, I think that would be the best way.’ he gave a slight smile ‘Save me a trip you might say.’

Adam started to leave the office, propelling Joe in front of him by gripping his shoulder.  As they reached the door Roy called after Joe.

‘Joe, I hope you realise how lucky you are to have Adam to speak for you.  When this is all over, I don’t want to see you in my official capacity again, understood.’

‘Yes, sir.’  Joe said softly.

 

Morton’s store was empty when they arrived, for which Joe was most relieved.  Adam had made it clear that Joe had to do this by himself and when they reached the counter, he stood back and let Joe talk to the store owner alone.  When he had finished talking, he handed the pocket knife to Mr Morton and waited for the verdict.  Henry Morton had listened without comment but with much surprise.  He glanced up at Adam a few times as if to confirm Joe’s story and when he was handed the knife he turned it over thoughtfully.  Joe felt as if time was standing still.

‘You going to tell all that in court on Monday, are you son?’  Morton asked.

Joe cleared his throat self-consciously ‘Yes, sir.  I never meant to keep the knife.’

Morton nodded ‘You ever steal anything before?’

Joe shook his head vehemently ‘No, sir.’

‘Well, you tell Sheriff Coffee that as long as Simmons is dealt with, I won’t press charges against any of the others, including you.’  he beckoned to Adam ‘Your Pa know about this?’

Adam moved up to stand alongside his little brother and put a hand on his shoulder reassuringly ‘No, Joe only told me this afternoon.  He will tell Pa tonight.’

Morton looked at Joe again ‘I’ve known your Pa for a good many years, watched you grow up.  I don’t doubt that he will have a few words to say to you.  I guess I can leave him to hand out what ever punishment he sees fit.’

Joe had no doubt that the words would not be few and the punishment would be severe, but for the moment he was content that at least there would be no problems with the law.

‘Thank you Mr Morton, you’ve been most understanding.’  Adam shook Morton’s hand ‘I promise Joe won’t ever do anything so stupid again.’

Joe was relieved to find himself standing on the sidewalk again, at least that problem had been solved.  However, Adam’s next words brought all his anxieties flooding back.

‘You’d better get on home and face the music there, little brother.  It’s getting late.’

Joe swallowed hard ‘You are coming with me, aren’t you?’  he said, hoping that his worst fears were unfounded.

His brother shook his head ‘You know I can’t.  You have to do this on your own.  I’m sorry, but my being there would only make things worse for you.’

Adam felt guilty that Joe would have to face this alone, but he knew that his presence would inflame his father’s temper rather than cool it.

‘If it helps, tell Hoss first.  He will support you.’

Joe pleaded for several minutes, but Adam hardened his heart and repeatedly refused.  Even for Joe, he would not apologise for his words to Ruth, he was convinced he was right.  Eventually Joe bowed to the inevitable, it was impossible to change Adam’s mind when he was being this stubborn.  He gave up the struggle and with a heavy heart collected Cochise and headed for home.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 16

 

 

It was almost midnight when Ben arrived back at the ranch house.  He was tired and confused and he wanted only to fall in to bed.  He had spent the day with Ruth in Carson City, shopping and making plans for the wedding, now just two weeks away.  He should have been relaxed and happy but somewhere in the back of his mind was a nagging doubt which had not been there before. He unsaddled Buck and turned him loose in the corral, he could not be bothered to put him up in the barn tonight.   The house was in darkness and he was careful to be very quiet as he went up the stairs.  Joe’s door was slightly ajar and he peeped in, expecting to see his son’s dark head on the pillow, but Joe’s bed was empty.  He pushed open the door and let the light from the hallway shine into the room. The bed was in disarray indicating that it had at least been occupied for a while, but there was no sign of Joe.

Ben knocked on Hoss’s door and entered without waiting for an answer.

‘Where’s your brother?’  he demanded of the sleepy figure that emerged from a mountain of bedclothes.

‘What?’  Hoss murmured still drowsy and confused with sleep.

‘Little Joe, he’s not in his room.’  Ben repeated exasperated at his son’s slow reaction.

Hoss’s heart missed a beat ‘Oh, no.’ he said now fully awakened.  Surely, Joe hadn’t run away, although after the story he had told tonight, it wouldn’t be a surprise.  If he had been in that much trouble, Hoss thought, he might have done just that rather than face the wrath of his father.

‘Well, do you know where he is?’  Ben snapped.

Hoss shook his head ‘He went to bed at the usual time and I thought he was still there.’  Hoss tried to see the time by his pocket watch, but it was too dark in his room.

‘Get dressed,  we’re going to look for him.’

It wasn’t until they were ready to ride that Ben spoke again.

‘Do you know why he might have gone out or for that matter where he might have gone?’  he asked.

Hoss flushed, he didn’t want to be the one to tell this story, so he tried to prevaricate.  ‘He was kinda upset Pa but I didn’t think he do this.  Maybe he went back to town to see Adam again.’

Hoss regretted the words the minute they were out of his mouth.

‘So your older brother has a hand in this again, does he?’  Ben’s temper rose at the suggestion.

‘I didn’t mean that Pa.’  Hoss tried to put right his mistake ‘It’s just….well… Joe is kinda in trouble …..and he told Adam……’  his voice trailed away unable to explain easily what had happened.

Ben guessed that Hoss was trying hard not to tell him anything, covering up for his brothers as usual, but he had to know. ‘What kind of trouble, Hoss?’  he said quietly, his parental intuition telling him that whatever it was, was serious.

Hoss looked embarrassed ‘Please Pa, couldn’t we just find Joe and he can tell you?’  he begged.

Ben sat down on a bale of hay and looked up at his son ‘Now exactly what has Joseph got himself into this time.’

He watched the mixture of emotions flitting across Hoss’s face and decided that to get the information he required he would have to play the heavy parent, Hoss was not going to volunteer.

‘Erik, I have no idea where to start looking, so we aren’t going anywhere until you tell me, what you know.  Is that clear?’  he spoke slowly and distinctly so that Hoss was left in no doubt that he meant what he said.

Hoss sighed and scraped his left foot in the dust of the barn floor.  He knew that when Pa used his given name, he meant business.  He inwardly cursed Joe for getting into trouble and Adam for not being there to sort it out.  Painfully slowly Ben dragged the story from Hoss, each revelation bringing a mixture of emotions from disbelief and anger to acceptance and guilt, much the same as Adam had felt hours before.

When Hoss had finished, he looked at his father for the first time since he had begun and tried to gauge his reaction, but Ben was giving nothing away.

‘You’d better ride into town, just in case he has gone to Adam.’  Ben sighed ‘I’ll ride up to the lake.  I can’t think where else he would go at this time of night.’

Hoss hesitated ‘Pa……he was awful upset…….. If you find him, well….’  he stopped and wished Adam was here, he was much better at pleading Joe’s cause.

Ben nodded ‘Let’s just find him first.’

 

Hoss rode as fast as he could in the darkness toward Virginia City. He rode into town on the back streets and passed the burned out livery stable and even in the half light he could see the extensive damage. It was the early hours of the morning when he tied his horse up outside the hotel.  The reception desk was empty and apart from a lamp burning on the stairs there was no sign of life.  Hoss swung the register around and ran his finger down the names.  Yes, there it was Adam Cartwright, room 12.  He went up the stairs as quietly as he could and knocked gently on the door of room 12.  He waited for a moment and then knocked again.

‘Ok, I’m coming.’  a grumpy voice replied.

Hoss was relieved that his brother was still awake but guessed that his slow response meant that Joe had not put in an appearance.

The door opened a crack to reveal a bleary eyed Adam and from his appearance Hoss guessed that he had been drinking heavily.

‘Hoss, what are you doing here at this hour?’  his heart missed a beat.

‘Is something wrong at home?’

Hoss nodded ‘Joe’s disappeared.  I hoped he’d come here.’

‘No, he’s not here.  I sent him home hours ago.’  Adam replied, both surprised and worried.

Hoss glanced around the hallway, aware that their voices could be disturbing other guests.

‘Can I come in, its awful late to be standing out here talking?’

For a moment Adam looked flustered and his face coloured with embarrassment.           ‘You go down to the lobby, I’ll join you in a minute, then we can go look for Joe.’  he said hurriedly.

Hoss was surprised at the suggestion, but he nodded and before he could turn away, his brother had closed the door.  Hoss shrugged and started to head for the stairs, as he did so he heard laughter and a woman’s voice from behind the closed door.

‘Before I come here again, could I just check whether you have any more brothers?’

‘I promise, I’ve only got two.’  he heard Adam answer.

 

In less than five minutes Adam had joined his brother in the lobby.  He appeared fairly sober but Hoss noticed that he smelled of whisky and cheap perfume and he obviously hadn’t shaved today.  It was most unlike the older brother he knew.

‘Now what’s all this about?’  he asked as he fastened his coat and buckled on his gun.

‘Joe came home and told me what happened in town, but he went to bed before Pa got home.  He was real worried about facing Pa.  I guess he must have left sometime after I went to bed, ‘cos when Pa got back, his room was empty.’

Adam frowned ‘He will have gone up to the lake, for sure.’

‘Well that’s what Pa thought.  He’s gone up there and I said I’d come in and check with you.’

Hoss was unsure what to do next.  It seemed a wasted journey now that he was here and yet he was reluctant to tell Adam so.

‘Maybe we had better ride out to the ranch and check that he is Ok.  If Pa didn’t find him, he’ll need all the help he can get for a proper search.’  Adam solved his brother’s dilemma.

‘I’m sorry I disturbed you.’  Hoss said his face flushing a deep red  ‘I had to be sure he wasn’t here.’

Adam suddenly realised that his brother must have heard Angie’s voice and he gave an embarrassed smile  ‘That’s Ok, I should have ridden home with him this afternoon.’  he cleared his throat self-consciously.  ‘Let’s hope he is there now.’

 

At the time Ben was leaving the ranch, his youngest son was standing on the lake shore looking out at the moonlight on the water.  Joe had not planned to run away, even now he intended to go back, if only he could find the courage.  He had taken Adam’s advice and had explained everything to Hoss, but it had given him no comfort.  Hoss had been more judgemental than Adam this time, and he had told Joe in no uncertain terms what he thought Pa would do to him.  He had tried to sleep tonight, but his conscience wouldn’t let him.  When he had heard Buck trot into the yard, he had fled from the anticipated interview with his father.

He kicked a loose stone and listened as it splashed into the dark water of the lake.  How could Hoss understand, he would never have been afraid of Simmons.  In fact Joe reasoned Hoss had probably never been afraid of anything in his life, except maybe Pa getting angry with him.  That brought him back to his problem, it wasn’t that he was scared of being punished, Pa was always fair and he knew he deserved whatever was coming to him.  No, it was the knowledge that Pa would be disappointed in him.  Nothing mattered more to him than his father’s opinion.  He wanted Pa to be proud of him and once again he had let him down, and he was ashamed to face him.

He walked back up the slight incline to the grove of trees that sheltered his mother’s grave and sat crossed legged on the ground beside the headstone.   She would be ashamed of him too, he thought and this feeling brought a lump to his throat.  He tried to remember if she had ever been angry with him, he guessed she must have been, but it was hard to recall specific incidents from that long ago.  He traced the carved letters on the stone, almost nine years ago now and for the thousandth time he asked God, why?  He could remember things about that last summer, but her face was misty and he needed to see it clearly.  He leaned against the cold stone and closed his eyes, he could hear her voice singing in his head and there was a smell of perfume.  He drifted back in time and he was five years old, safe in his mother’s arms and she was singing him to sleep.

Ben stood to one side of the grove of trees and watched the sleeping figure for several minutes.  He had guessed correctly, but he took no pleasure from it.  On his ride up here he had experienced a feeling of guilt that would not go away.  Joe was his son and he was responsible for his behaviour,  he should have seen what was happening and would have done if he hadn’t been so wrapped up in Ruth.  He was angry but not with Joe or Adam.  He was angry with himself.  He had failed as a parent.  Adam felt he could not live with him and Joe was afraid to bring his troubles to him and it hurt.  A deep hurt that Ruth would never heal.

He knelt down by his sleeping son and gently brushed the soft brown hair from his eyes.  Joe woke with a start and seeing his father so close, he instinctively shrank away from him.  If Pa was here he must know.  His heartbeat quickened and his breathing became shallow and nervous.

‘I had a feeling I’d find you here.’  Ben said quietly, he had felt Joe’s instinctive reaction and like the day it had happened on the walk by the lake, it had hurt.

‘I come here myself when I need someone to talk to, I usually find it helps.’

Just for a moment Joe’s breathing returned to normal, Pa’s voice was soft and gentle, maybe he did not know the terrible things he had done.  His relief was short-lived, if Pa didn’t know then he would have to tell him and that was much worse.

‘Well…..’  he said quietly, putting his arm around Joe’s shoulders ‘You’ve told Adam, you’ve told Hoss, and I guess you’ve told your mother, do you think you could manage to tell me now?’

Joe cleared his throat, but his voice still came out as a croak ‘Didn’t Hoss tell you?’

Ben nodded thoughtfully ‘He did, but I want to hear what you have to say.’

Joe couldn’t believe his father’s tone, if he knew, why didn’t he sound angry.  With a little more confidence he started his story.  Ben stopped him once or twice to ask questions but in the main he allowed him to talk unhindered.  When he had finished Joe waited for his father to comment, but for several minutes there was just the sound of the water lapping gently on the sand.  When he thought he could stand the tension no more, his father spoke.

‘Why didn’t you come to me, when you first took the knife?’ he asked, his voice calm and quiet.

‘I wanted to, but it was difficult.  When Travis first asked me to join his gang you were away in San Francisco and then you were always busy with……’ his voice trailed away.

Ben pursed his lips ‘…..with Ruth.’ he finished for him.

‘Yeah, I guess so.  I’m sorry Pa.  I never meant to steal, I was going to put it back, but it all went wrong.’  Pa didn’t sound angry and Joe’s confidence was returning, maybe it would be Ok after all.

‘But you did steal.’  Ben said more sternly ‘….and you lied about it and covered up for others stealing, isn’t that so?’

Joe swallowed hard ‘Yes, sir.’

‘And this fire, are you sure you didn’t know what Travis intended to do?’

Joe shook his head ‘He told us he wanted to scare Charlie, ‘cos he lost his job.  Only Scotty knew that he was going to set a fire.’

Ben sighed ‘Joseph, how could you be so irresponsible, even without the coal oil, you could have started that fire.  I don’t know how many times I’ve told you and your brothers to be carefully with lanterns and matches around the barn.  You must have known that firecrackers could start a fire with all the straw around.’

‘I’m sorry Pa, I guess I didn’t think of that.  I was too worried about Travis.’  he looked down at the damp earth and waited for his father to say more.  He knew that the confidence he had felt earlier was misplaced.  Pa was indeed very angry and disappointed with him.  He always got quieter when he was really angry and the tone of his voice told Joe that this was the case right now.

Ben suddenly stood up and taking Joe by the arm hauled him to his feet.

‘Let’s get on home, I’m tired and I can’t think things through tonight.  I hope Judge Gilman is as understanding as Mr Morton and Sheriff Coffee, but I think you’ve already had more leeway than you deserve.’

Joe couldn’t fathom his father’s mood.  He knew he was angry but why wasn’t he yelling at him.  He had expected his father to be furious and to lecture him and eventually punish him, but he seemed to be in another world.   Joe decided that whatever the result he needed to know what his father intended to do, he took a deep breath  ‘Are you going to punish me?’  he said softly.

Ben rubbed his chin thoughtfully and then looked directly at his young son, until Joe was forced to look away.

‘We’ll get around to that.’  he said sharply, then he paused and caught Joe’s chin in his hand forcing him to look up,  ‘I ought to take my belt to you and give you the whipping you so richly deserve, right now, but first you tell your story in court and face whatever Judge Gilman decides.  I know I don’t have to tell you how ashamed I am of you.  I guess its partly my fault for being so lenient with you in the past.’

This was more what Joe had expected and he was surprised to discover that it actually made him feel better.  Up to now his conscience had been troubling him and causing nightmares, now his father knew and he was facing up to what he had done, it all seemed so much easier somehow.  Even the almost certain prospect of a tanning was a relief, anything was better than the terrible fear of the unknown that he had been suffering for weeks.  He was worried about going into court and seeing Travis but he knew his father and brothers would be there beside him to support him.  He wished fervently that he had told his father right from the start.

Ben released him and took up the reins of his horse.  ‘Hoss should be back from town by the time we get home, I expect he has worried Adam as well.  Do you realise just how much trouble you have caused tonight?’  he snapped, then climbed into the saddle without waiting for an answer.

Joe caught up Cochise’s reins and followed his father,  anxious now to get home

and to get all this trouble sorted out.

 

As it happened they were home well before Hoss, and Ben sent Joe straight to bed.  He made himself coffee and sat down to await his son’s return.   He was dozing fitfully in the chair, when he heard footsteps on the porch.

Hoss burst in to the room in his usual manner letting the cold night air sweep across to where his father was sitting.

‘Pa is he Ok? I saw Cochise in the corral.’  he blurted out.

Ben got to his feet and nodded ‘He’s fine…….’  he stopped suddenly aware of the figure behind Hoss.  ‘I’m sorry you rode all the way out here unnecessarily.’  he said stiffly, noting Adam s unkempt appearance.

‘I wanted to be sure he was alright.  I should have come with him this afternoon.’  Adam wanted to say more, but his pride wouldn’t let him.

Ben grunted ‘He was up at the lake……..he’s asleep now.’

Adam stood uncertainly in the doorway, he wished his father would say something.       Since you re here, you’d better have some coffee, its a long ride at night.’  Ben muttered holding out the coffee pot.

Adam closed the door and gratefully filled a cup for himself.  The events of the day were rapidly catching up with him and the effects of too much whisky earlier in the evening, combined with the ride in the night air, were making him feel sick and disorientated.

He offered the coffee pot to Hoss.  His brother shook his head, ‘I’m for my bed.’  he wanted to leave them alone, in the vain hope that maybe they would patch up their differences.

With Hoss gone the silence became oppressive.  Ben could remember other nights like this when he and his oldest son had disagreed, why was it always so difficult for either of them to say sorry.  He answered his own question almost immediately, it was because they were so alike, both stubborn.

Adam too, was remembering but his memories were of Marie.  She had always known how to get them talking again, like Inger before her and like Hoss now, she had been the mediator between him and his father.  He smiled to himself, in this situation she would probably have knocked their heads together, for unlike Inger and Hoss, Marie had never been afraid to show her temper when they infuriated her with their silences.

Ben noticed the smile but made no comment.  He cleared his throat loudly ‘I guess you’d better stay the night, no sense in riding back to town until morning.’

Since his father had made the first move, Adam felt obliged to offer an olive branch too.

‘Thanks, I’d like that……’  he waited for a heartbeat then took a deep breath ‘…..I’m sorry about the other evening.  I should have kept my opinions to myself.’  he paused his face set in its most stubborn expression ‘I still believe everything I said, but until I had proof, I should have kept quiet.’

Ben nodded ‘Yes, you should’ve.’  he stared hard at his son ‘But your apology should be to Ruth not to me.  She has explained about Matt Tolliver, to me.  I really don’t see that it’s anyone’s business but hers, but since you have made such an issue of it, I will tell you.  He was a friend of her husbands, they sailed together years ago and Ruth had some letters and personal items of her husbands that she wanted Matt to have.  She had never met him before, and when she did, she didn’t like him, that is why she moved out and into Virginia City.’

Adam sighed ‘That maybe true but…….’

Ben stood up towering over Adam, his face white with anger ‘Maybe,  maybe…..what does it take to convince you that you are wrong.’

Adam got to his feet, he had been going to tell his father about Gideon Stoddard but he had no proof that there was any connection between them, and no proof that the name was not merely a coincidence.   He knew without proof, his father would tear him apart and he was too tired for yet another confrontation..

‘I guess we just have to disagree.  I think it would be better if I did ride back to town now, it will soon be light.’  he picked up his hat and made for the door.

Ben watched him go in silence and listened to the sound of fading hoof beats with a defeated expression.  He crossed over to the desk and sat in his leather chair.  Almost without thinking he reached into the drawer and took out Elizabeth’s picture.  He gazed at it for several moments and once again fingered the dent in the frame. How had that got there and why did it bother him so much?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 17

 

 

Joe had never been into a court room before and the experience was just a little

daunting. Although Pete and Joe were charged with arson and theft, it had been agreed that because of their age they could remain seated with their parents. Joe was between his father and Hoss and was grateful for their reassuring presence, but every few seconds he would look around, hoping that Adam would appear.  He had not seen him since Saturday afternoon. Hoss had told him that Adam had been at the ranch in the early hours of Sunday morning, but had not stayed the night because of yet another disagreement with Pa.  There was also no sign of Ruth for which Joe was grateful, he needed his father all to himself today.

Yesterday had been spent in a visit to church and a long and boring afternoon during which Joe had endeavoured to avoid his father.  Pa had made it quite clear that he had no intention of discussing his behaviour until the court case was over,  and this made Joe feel uncomfortable in his presence.

Beside him Ben was fidgeting with his watch chain.  He had asked Ruth not to attend and he had only seen her briefly the day before.  He had tried to explain his reasons and his guilt but he didn’t feel that she had really understood.  His doubts were growing but he had nothing on which to base his feelings except a voice in his head which seemed to be telling him to stop the wedding.  He came back to the present as Judge Gilman entered the court room and the proceedings began.

Roy Coffee gave evidence which covered the many thefts that had occurred and the details of the fire, but nothing that he had to say tied Travis to any crime.  Only Pete Jordan and Joe could do that and it was a moment that Joe was dreading.  His father’s lawyer had agreed to defend both Joe and Pete and as he got up to question the Sheriff, Joe caught sight of Travis on the other side of the courtroom.  He had not expected to see him here and the look Travis gave him was one of such hate that for a moment all Joe’s fears returned.

‘Sheriff Coffee, you have given very full evidence of thefts but can you tell the court exactly what proof you have that my clients were involved in any of those incidents? Hiram Wood asked.

‘Well, no proof exactly but I have their signed confessions.’  Roy said firmly.

‘Both my clients say that they were unaware of the presence of coal oil at the scene of the fire until after the incident.  Have you any evidence to the contrary?

‘No, I don’t.  As I said before, there was coal oil spread around and Pete Jordan and a boy answering Joe Cartwright’s description were seen throwing firecrackers into the barn.’

Roy looked directly at Ben as he spoke.  He regretted what this was doing to his old friend but he had warned him, that he would treat Joe no different from any other boy.

‘Thank you Sheriff.  I have no further questions.’

Henry Morton gave evidence of the thefts from his store and to Joe’s delight, he supported the view that Travis was encouraging younger boys to steal.  He told the court that it had always seemed strange that whenever anything was stolen, Travis was always in the vicinity.  He also repeated that he did not intend to press charges against either Pete or Joe.

Charlie’s evidence also condemned Travis although he could offer no proof of his involvement. He also admitted that he couldn t identify the boys seen throwing firecrackers. Pete Jordan was called next and he gave halting answers to all the questions put to him and the prosecution lawyer immediately pounced on the fact that Pete had been one of those convicted of theft only weeks before.

‘Your Honour, are we expected to believe the word of a boy who has been convicted of stealing in this very court.  We know he is a thief and now I maintain that he planned this fire with Joseph Cartwright.  The suggestion that others were involved is pure fabrication to protect himself.

Joe had tried to avoid looking at anyone during the morning and it came as a bit of a shock when he heard his name called.  He got to his feet and still avoiding eye contact with anyone, made his way to the witness stand.  His voice almost failed him when he took the oath and then had to state his name.

He was permitted to tell his story in his own words and he tried to sound confident, his voice only faltering when he was explaining how he had taken the knife from Mr Morton’s store.  Every now and then he would glance at his father to see how he was reacting.  Always he saw support and encouragement and it gave him the courage to name Travis and to explain how he had tricked or threatened younger boys into doing his stealing for him.  Joe was relieved when he had finished and for a moment he relaxed.

The prosecution lawyer started off easily enough but gradually his questions led towards the theft of the knife.

‘Now young man are you asking this court to believe that you took the knife as a dare, or because you were afraid of Travis Simmons, which is it?’

Joe was confused, but he tried to make things clear ‘I took the knife as a dare, it was only afterwards that I was afraid of what Travis would say to my Pa.’

The lawyer nodded ‘Oh, you weren’t worried about breaking the law then?’  he said sarcastically. ‘I suggest that you are the one behind these thefts and the fire, its well known that you have quite a following amongst the other boys.  It was only when the fire got out of hand and you thought you would be caught that you dreamed up this story about Travis Simmons.’

‘That’s not true.’  Joe shouted.

‘Did you think that your father would be able to buy you out of trouble, is that it?’ the lawyer persisted.

Hiram immediately objected and the Judge insisted that this line of questioning stop.

‘I think you have made your point.’   Judge Gilman said quietly.

‘By your own admission, you are a thief.’ the lawyer persisted. ‘Do you also tell lies?’

Joe shook his head ‘No, I don’t.’ he said firmly.

‘You mean you have never told a lie?’

Joe swallowed hard and looked at the Judge and then at his father ‘I guess I have a few times.’  he said very softly.

The lawyer nodded ‘A few times, and this is one of them.’

‘No.’ Joe said more strongly ‘I am telling the truth. Travis set the fire, he wanted to get back at Charlie.’

‘No more questions, Your Honour.’  the lawyer walked away, leaving Joe very scared.

‘You may return to your seat, young man.’  Judge Gilman said quietly.

Joe got up with a feeling of anxiety, it was not turning out how he had imagined.  So far there was no evidence to prove that Travis was involved in anyway.  Indeed it looked as though he would be seen as the ringleader.  As he crossed the court room to his chair, he caught sight of his eldest brother, leaning on the door frame.  Adam raised his eyebrows and gave him an encouraging smile and Joe immediately felt better.  He sat down and glanced up at his father, all that mattered to him was that Pa believed him.  His father was watching Hiram Wood and his face betrayed nothing of his feelings.

To Joe’s surprise Mr Wood had one more witness and it was a shock to more than one person in the court.

‘Your Honour, I should like to call Scott Malloy to the stand.’

Hiram shuffled his papers and waited while Scotty walked to the chair and took the oath.  He was a scruffy boy of around sixteen, the son of an out of worker miner who spent most of his time drunk and Scotty had learned early in life to take care of himself.  For a brief period he had worked on the Ponderosa, but he never held a job for long.

‘Would you tell the court how the livery stable fire started?’ Hiram said simply.

Scotty looked nervously at Travis and then across at Adam

‘Trav was mad ‘cos old Charlie threw him out, he wanted to get back at him.’  He sniffed and looked at Travis again ‘We stole some coal oil from the store and spread it around the livery stable when Charlie was having his lunch.  Then he made the kids throw firecrackers into it.’

Hiram leaned closer to Scotty ‘You say he made them, what do you mean?’

‘Well, he threatened ’em.  He already beat up on Joe once, when he tried to stop paying him and he made Pete do things by threatening his little sister.’  Scotty stopped and looked at Joe.  ‘Trav really had it in for Joe, ‘cos of what his old man did to Trav’s Pa and brothers a couple of years back.  He wanted to get him into real trouble, so he would go to jail.’

Ben closed his eyes, he had a sickening feeling in the pit of his stomach.  Why hadn’t he known that Joe had been beaten.  He should have realised that this was more than a child’s game to Simmons.

Hiram pressed home his point ‘So, you are saying that Travis set this up deliberately to implicate Joe Cartwright.’

Scotty nodded ‘Yeah, he kept telling me that, he would get even with Ben Cartwright.’

‘One final question Scott. Why are you telling this now, since you are also involved?’

Scotty shrugged  ‘I guess I got fed up with doing what Trav wanted all the time and I like Joe’s brother, he’s the only one ever helped me.  I figured by telling the truth I could may be help Joe, sort of say thanks.’

Judge Gilman leaned over and looked Scotty in the eye ‘Did anyone make you testify or tell you what to say?’

Scotty met his stare unblinkingly ‘No, sir.  Adam Cartwright just asked me to tell the truth and that’s what I’m doing.’

Joe closed his eyes and thanked his big brother from the bottom of his heart,

whatever happened now, at least the judge knew the truth.

Both lawyers made closing statements to the Judge, but it was obvious that

innocence or guilt were not the issue.  What mattered was whether the Judge believed that they had acted alone or with Travis’s influence.  His decision would depend on that, and Joe was not confident that it would be favourable.

The judge adjourned the court while he considered the evidence and Joe was able to follow his father outside into the fresh air.   He looked all around for Adam, but he had vanished.

As they came out of the building, Ruth walked over to join them.

‘What happened Ben?  I’ve been so worried.’  she put her arm possessively around him.

‘It’s hard to say how it went, we won’t know until the judge is ready to give his verdict. At least Roy has some evidence to arrest Simmons, now.’  he turned to Joe, forcing Ruth to take her arm away.

‘Why didn’t you tell me Simmons was taking money from you and beating you?’  he sounded really upset and concerned.

‘I don’t know, it all seemed so mixed up.  I guess I was scared to tell you ‘cos of all the other things I would have to tell you about.’  Joe confessed,  he looked at Ruth  ‘You never seemed to be around when I wanted to talk.’

‘Why don’t we go and get something to eat.’  Ruth suggested.

‘I’m not hungry, Pa.  I’ll just stay here if that’s Ok?’  Joe was still hoping that Adam would come back and he didn’t want to miss him.

‘Well, we can just go across the street.  He’ll be fine here on his own.’  Ruth said brightly, she couldn’t understand why Ben was so concerned.

Ben shook his head ‘You go with Hoss.  I’ll stay and keep Joe company.’

Ruth looked puzzled ‘That’s silly, he’s old enough to be left alone, surely.’

‘That’s just the problem.  I’ve left him alone too much lately.’  he snapped at her.  ‘If I’d been doing my job properly none of this would have happened.  Roy was right, I’ve neglected my responsibilities and this is as much my fault as Joseph’s.’

It was the first time since she had known him that he had spoken in anything other than a gentle voice to her and she was hurt and surprised.

‘I’m sorry, I thought you enjoyed spending time with me.’  she gave an expressive shrug.

Ben sighed ‘Look Ruth, I need to sort this out today and Joe needs me with him.  I’ll call on you as soon as I can.’  his voice showing his exasperation at her lack of understanding.

He turned back to Joe, and Ruth felt dismissed as he led his son to a bench outside the court.  She watched them for a moment and then walked away, leaving Hoss staring after her.  Ben regretted snapping at her, but just at the moment he needed to attend to family affairs and Ruth did not seem sympathetic to that need.  There would be time to put it right tomorrow.

 

The three of them spent an hour sitting in the warm sunshine.  Hoss would have like to eat, but after the scene with Ruth he decided it was better not to mention it.  Joe looked out into the street, expecting to see Adam, but he didn’t come.  Joe knew that he had been the one to get Scotty to testify and he wanted to thank him.  He was lost in thought, when a voice at his shoulder startled him.

‘Well, its Joe isn’t it?’  he looked up to see the girl from the hotel.

‘Oh, Hi.’  he replied, slightly embarrassed that she should remember him.

She smiled at Ben and Hoss ‘Adam told me what happened.  Don’t you worry, it’ll all turn out alright.  If you see him, tell him that I’ll see him tonight in the Silver Dollar.’  she laughed at his obvious discomfort and went on her way.

Ben glared at Joe ‘And just who was that?’  he said sharply.

Joe didn’t know how to answer, if he said he knew her, it wasn’t strictly true and he had promised Adam not to say anything about her.

‘I met her once when I came into town,  she was having a drink with Adam.’  He admitted, hoping his father wouldn’t question him further.

‘And what were you doing in a saloon?’  his father demanded.

Joe realised he was getting into deeper water but he had to keep to the truth, he was in enough trouble already without adding more lies.  ‘It wasn’t in the saloon, it was at the International House.’

Ben raised his eyebrows but decided that it was probably better that he didn’t ask anymore questions of Joe.  He intended to ask a few of Adam though.  Then he remembered that Adam no longer lived at home and could keep company with whoever he pleased.  The guilt returned, not only was Joe in trouble because of his relationship with Ruth, but it looked as though Adam was getting mixed up with unsavoury company too.  He was relieved when it was time to return to court, at least one problem should soon be solved one way or another.

 

This time Joe and Pete were made to sit with Sheriff Coffee while the judge

delivered his verdict.  Both were nervous, although Pete had been through it before.  Last time he had been let off with a warning but this time he expected to receive some kind of punishment.  Joe was hoping that Pete’s experience would mean he would get away with the same warning.

Judge Gilman came back into court and Roy indicated that the boys should stand up. Joe glanced quickly at his father as he got to his feet and as he turned around, he saw Adam at the back of the court again, the reassuring smile still in place.

‘Well, I’ve considered all the evidence and I feel that there is no doubt that both of you were involved in stealing from the mercantile and are implicated in the livery stable fire. I accept the evidence offered, that you were acting under duress at the time, but that does not excuse your behaviour.  Mr Morton has said that he will withdraw the charges for theft and therefore that matter is closed.  On the charge of  arson, I find you both, guilty.’  he paused and looked sternly at both of them.

Joe bit his lip and waited for him to go on, Sheriff Coffee had made it quite clear that there was a possibility of a prison sentence and he was scared.

‘Since you were acting on the orders of another, I do not intend to sentence you to a jail term.  Although, you should be aware that I could do so, if I saw fit.  I have decided that in this case it would be of more benefit to you and the community if you were made to put right the damage you have caused.  You will therefore work for Mr Wallace for the period of  your school vacation.  You will be released into the custody of your parents and the cost of the repairs to Mr Wallace’s premises will be charged to them.  Whether or not they decide to punish you further, I leave to them.’  he leaned forward  ‘I hope you realise the expense and worry you have put your parents through and I do not expect to see either of you here again, or I shall not be so lenient.  Is that understood by you both?’

‘Yes, sir.’  they replied.

Joe breathed again, working for Charlie would be hard but not unpleasant and the worst part of facing his father had already passed.  His father had not actually punished him yet and he guessed that was still to come.  All things considered, he knew he had got off lightly so far.

 

Joe and Hoss waited outside while Ben talked to Sheriff Coffee, but to Joe’s

disappointment Adam had disappeared again.  He mentioned it to Hoss, hoping maybe his brother had spoken to him.

Hoss shook his head, ‘Not since Saturday night and we didn’t do much talking even then.’

‘I wish he would come home, it’s strange without him around.’

Hoss laughed ‘Two years ago you wanted him to go back to Boston, what’s changed your mind?’

‘Oh, I don’t know.  Sometimes I wish he wasn’t so bossy, but mostly he’s Ok.  Do you think he will come back?’

‘I’m not sure, not until this business with Ruth is sorted out anyway.’  he looked

thoughtful ‘By the way, who was that girl you spoke to?’

‘Like I told Pa, she was having a drink with Adam at the hotel one day.’  Joe

sidestepped the issue and hoped Hoss would leave it there.

‘Yeah, I think she was there on Saturday night too.  Katie sure won’t like it if she finds out.’  Hoss observed.

At that point Joe nudged his brother in an effort to keep him quiet, Pa had come out of the court house and it was not a conversation that Joe wanted him to overhear.

Ben looked sternly at Joe, ‘I’ve settled up with the court for the damages to the livery stable.  I think maybe its time we went home to discuss how you are going to pay for all the trouble you’ve caused.’  he said ominously.

Without waiting for an answer he started down the street.  Hoss raised his eyebrows at his little brother and indicated that they should follow.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 18

 

 

 

Adam was beginning to tire of the noise in the saloon.  It seemed that since he had left home he had done very little.  His days had included a fruitless search for work and he had managed to talk young Malloy into telling the truth, but his nights had been spent drowning his sorrows in a whisky bottle.  Today in court had made him realise just how low he could sink, if he didn’t pull himself together.  Angie’s company, which was fine when drinking, was less than stimulating when sober.  He missed Katie’s sparkling conversation but when he had called on her yesterday, she had gone to Sacramento with her mother for a visit and wouldn’t be back for a couple of weeks. He missed his books and music.  He would like to go home, to know how Joe was coping and to sit quietly in the company of his family, but until he could find out about Ruth that was not possible.

‘Why don’t we go to the hotel and eat, then back to my place?’  Angie suggested, hanging on to his arm.

Adam shook her off, irritated at her possessive hold on him ‘Look Angie, I don’t feel like company tonight.  I’m going back to the hotel.’

‘I’ll come with you, we can take a bottle and get some food.’  she replied.

Adam felt his temper rising ‘I said, I want to be on my own.  Go find someone else to spend money on you.’  he snapped.

‘Well, well.  Mr high and mighty Cartwright, back to his old self.  You didn’t mind me looking after you when you were drunk, but sober you don’t want to be seen with me do you?’  She got to her feet and placed both hands flat on the table, leaning toward him angrily ‘You don’t get rid of me that easily.’

Adam glanced up at her, his expression weary ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

‘I talked to your little brother today, your Pa was with him.’  she said with a triumphant glint in her eye.

‘You stay away from my brother.’  Adam spat out from between gritted teeth.

‘Oh, I won’t just see him, I’ll also have a little talk with a certain young lady or maybe her Pa.’

Adam realised what a fool he had been to think that Angie would go quietly.  Now that it was too late, her scheme was obvious. Either he continued to buy her presents and give her money or any hopes he had of continuing to see Katie were gone.  How could he have been so stupid. He thought of his conversation with Joe, “no one can make you do something you know is wrong unless you let them” the words echoed in his head. He had blamed Joe for allowing Simmons to blackmail him, now he was being given the same choice.  He sighed and got to his feet, well he had made the mistake, and now, just like his younger brother, he would have to pay for it.

‘I’m going to the hotel, alone, Angie.  You can do whatever you like but it will be without me.’  he pushed his chair back and threw some coins on the table ‘That should cover the drinks up to now.’

He walked out of the saloon without a second glance and only when he got into the fresh night air did he allow himself to give in to the despair he felt.  He walked slowly back to the hotel wondering where he went from here.  Tomorrow he would leave Virginia City and go looking for work where the name of Cartwright was not known.  He had no idea how far that would take him, but he knew he had to go.

He had gone perhaps three steps up the staircase when a voice called him back.

‘Hey, Adam, there’s a telegraph for you.’  Tom Madigan called.

Adam turned and took the flimsy sheet that Tom was holding out to him.  He read it quickly then again more slowly, disbelief and astonishment registering on his face causing Tom Madigan to wonder exactly what the telegraph contained.

‘Thanks, Tom.  Is Mrs Walsh in her room?’

Tom nodded ‘Yes, I think so, she ate alone in the dining room and her key is missing.’

Adam walked slowly up the stairs and turned away from his room towards the one occupied by Ruth.  He was checking the room numbers when he heard her voice raised in anger.

‘I’ve had enough Gid, I’m not going to listen to you anymore.’

Adam stopped, he always told Joe that eavesdropping would get him into trouble, but this time he thought it might help to understand just what was going on.  He positioned himself next to the door and continued to listen.

‘You’ll do what I say.  We need that money and the only way for us to get it is for you to marry Ben Cartwright.  We planned it that way and that s what is going to happen.’  Gideon Stone replied.

‘No Gid, you need the money, not me.  I can manage.  Its your debt not mine.  I’m through getting you out of trouble.  All my life I’ve had to cover for you, I married one man to get you out of jail, I’ll not marry another to keep you out.’  Ruth was almost shouting now. ‘You’re just like father, a gambler and a drunk.’

‘We both had bad luck Ruthie, that’s all.’  Gideon was pleading now. ‘You have to help me, what about the family name.’

Ruth gave a bitter laugh ‘My name’s Walsh, and the Stoddard family disowned father and you, years ago.  The last time I saw Uncle Abel, I was fifteen years old.  Even then I envied Elizabeth her family and her fiancé‚.  I never thought you would make me sink so low as to try to trick him into a marriage to support you.’

‘Please Ruthie, he need never know.  He never met you, in Boston.  He won’t ever make the connection.  Once you’re married you can send me money.  I promise I won’t bother you.’  Gideon was obviously desperate.

‘Your plan misfired Gid, you wanted him to fall in love with me because I looked like Elizabeth, but you forgot that it was just possible that I might fall in love with him.  Now get out before I call the sheriff.  I’m sure he’d be pleased to know you’re wanted in California.’

Adam heard a movement towards the door and ducked quickly around the corner and back to his own room.

 

He had planned to confront Ruth with the telegraph message, but now he was doubting the wisdom of that move.  He sat down on the bed and read his grandfather’s message again.  His head told him that he should ride out to the ranch and tell his father what he knew.  His heart wanted him to keep quiet.  From what he had just overheard, Ruth loved his father and Pa obviously loved her, why did her original motives or the family relationship matter.  More than anything, he wanted to mend the rift with his father and keeping quiet, saying he was wrong and apologising were his best options if he wished to do that.

For several hours he paced the room or sat, head in hands considering what to do.  He had always believed in telling the truth, it was something Pa had drummed into him and his brothers as children. It was the one thing guaranteed to bring down the full weight of Pa s wrath, if he caught them lying to him.  He thought back over his life and tried to recall if he had ever told a deliberate lie.  There had been some, he guessed, particularly when he was younger but his adult life had been based on truth, sometimes to his cost.  He knew that many people considered him cold and aloof.  His stubbornness and defence of his views in the face of any opposition often made him enemies.  To live a lie now would be an intolerable burden for him.  His choice was plain, either tell the truth and risk ruining his father’s chance of happiness or say nothing and leave Nevada and his family for ever.

He got up and looked out on the street. Virginia City never slept these days and lights still burned and rowdy miners still celebrated in the saloons.  He guessed it must be early morning, but he could not sleep.   He reached out for the most precious item he had brought with him, his mother’s music box.  He opened it slowly and wondered if his father had missed it.  The music could transport him to so many places, he had played it as a child in boarding houses, wagons, cabins and in all manner of unlikely situations, it brought back so many memories.  As he closed the lid and the music stopped, a voice in his head seemed to be telling him what he must do.  He fell into bed, at last he could sleep.

 

A few miles away across the Washoe valley a dim light burned in the Ponderosa ranch house.  Ben was pacing the floor unable to sleep too.  He had gone to bed early enough and had fallen asleep but he had been awakened by his dreams.  He wandered through the quiet house. First he looked in on Hoss and tried to turn him over to prevent the snoring that was disturbing his thoughts, but after two attempts he gave up and closed the door.

He went to Joe’s room and stood looking down at his youngest son, wondering for the hundredth time, if he had been too hard on him tonight.  He couldn’t help but feel that Joe’s behaviour was at least partly his fault.  He reached down and pulled the quilt up to Joe’s chin and tucked it in to the side of the bed, remembering the many times he had done the same thing in the past nine years.   It was something that he and Marie used to do together before going to bed themselves and the memory made him sad.

He closed the door very quietly and walked along the passageway to Adam’s room, he hesitated before pushing open the door.  For a moment he let his eyes adjust to the darkness then he decided to light the lamp.  The warm glow spread around the room and Ben looked at the familiar objects with a deep melancholy.  Adam’s books and his guitar, the most important symbols of the man that had slept in this room seemed to mock him.  He went to the desk  and sat down, something was different.  He noted absently that Hop Sing hadn’t dusted in here for a while, there was an oval mark where something had been removed.  It hit him like a hammer, the music box was gone.  Adam had taken it, a need to have something of home, or a sure sign that he was not planning to return, which was it?

He leaned over and picked up a slim volume of poetry, Adam must have been reading it just before he left.  He flipped the book shut and replaced it on the shelf, moving a couple of books to make space for it.  His hand fell on the most precious book in Adam’s collection, its binding worn and the pages yellowed with age,  Milton’s ‘Paradise Lost’.  He held it reverently in his hand before opening it to the flyleaf and the inscription, ‘Elizabeth, my love’ .  For a moment he closed his eyes and went back twenty six years to Boston, he gave a deep sigh.

Afterwards he was never sure how long he had been there, or what had happened in that time. He awoke as the first light of dawn crept into the room and the sky turned a delicate shade of pink, with the certain knowledge that he had not been alone.  He was still holding the book and as he placed it gently back on the shelf and rubbed the sleep from his eyes, he was surprised to find that his cheeks were wet with tears.

His mind was clear for the first time in days and he knew what he was going to do.  He purposefully, strode down the stairs and into the kitchen to join Hop Sing for morning tea, something he had not done for months.

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 19

 

 

‘I’m going in to town right after breakfast, Hoss.  Can you ride up and check on the logging crew for me, I meant to find time to do it last week.’  Ben was hurriedly finishing his meal anxious to get away.

‘Sure Pa, anything else you want me to do?’  Hoss replied helping himself to his third large portion of ham and eggs of the morning.

Ben shook his head ‘No, I think that’s about it, except for the usual yard chores.’

Hoss took a sip of his coffee and glanced across at his little brother who was eating in silence with his eyes fixed firmly on his plate.  He tried to guess his father’s mood, it seemed quite good, so he decided to ask.

‘Is it Ok, if I take Joe fishing this afternoon, it’s a while since we did that together and he ain’t gonna get much chance once he starts working for Charlie, next week.’

Ben gave a half smile ‘He doesn’t deserve to go, but I suppose that if he gets his chores finished you might as well.’  he put down his napkin and got to his feet ‘Joseph, you can go if you make sure you do exactly as Hoss tells you, is that clear.’

Joe cleared his throat self-consciously ‘Yes, sir.’  he didn’t look up.

Ben raised his eyebrows at Hoss. ‘I’ll be back some time before supper.’

Hoss waited until his father was out in the yard before he spoke again.

‘You want to go fishing Joe, we could go down to the creek?  If that’s Ok?’

Joe looked up and gave his brother a weak grin ‘Sure, as long as I don’t have to ride.’

Hoss returned the grin.

 

They had barely started the chores when Adam rode into the yard, dismounted and tied Sport to the rail.

‘What are you doing out here?’  Hoss asked in a surprised voice.

‘I used to live here, can’t I even visit.’  Adam replied with a smile.

Hoss returned the smile and grabbed him by the hand ‘Its good to see you.  Pa’s gone into town.’  he glanced at his brother ‘….or did you already know that?’

‘No, it was him I wanted to see.’

‘Well he won’t be back until tonight, he’s gone to see Ruth.’

Joe came out of the barn at the sound of Adam’s voice ‘Hi kid, how are you?’  Adam smiled at him.

Usually, Joe would rise to the bait, he hated Adam referring to him as kid but this morning it sounded good. ‘Not too bad considering.’  he grinned.

Adam put his head on one side, looked at his little brother and nodded, he didn’t have to ask considering what!

‘Hey, Adam, why don’t you come fishing with us, then you can see Pa when he gets back.’  Hoss suggested.

‘If you recall, it was fishing that got me thrown out.  Oh, heck why not?  I’ll give you a hand with the chores and tell you why I came out here at the same time.’

Joe thrust a rake into his hand ‘Best offer you’ve ever made.’ he laughed.

They worked steadily for a while without saying much but when they stopped for a break, Adam reached into his pocket for the telegram.  He handed it to Hoss and perched on the edge of the water trough while his brother read it.  Joe tried to read it too but Hoss was too tall for him to see it clearly.

‘What does it say?’ he begged.

Adam pulled him towards him and gave him a hug. ‘It says that Ruth Walsh is my second cousin.  Her father and my grandfather were brothers.  Her name was Stoddard before she married and the man she was seeing in Virginia City is her brother.’

Hoss handed back the telegram and gave a low whistle ‘It also says that her father and brother were disowned by the family because of massive gambling debts, which Ruth’s husband paid off for them.’

Adam pushed the paper back into his pocket ‘I overheard them talking last night.  The plan was for Ruth to marry Pa, so that he could do the same again for her brother.’  he looked apologetically at Hoss ‘….but I was wrong about one thing.  She genuinely loves Pa and last night she told her brother that she wouldn’t go along with his plan.’

‘You mean she’s not going to marry Pa?’  Hoss asked.

‘I don’t know.  She just said she wasn’t going to give her brother any money.’

‘What do we do now?’ he looked at Adam quizzically ‘Did you come out here to confront Pa with that?’

Adam shook his head ‘Not in the way you mean, no.  I wanted him to know the truth but I also wanted to apologise for the way I behaved and try to put things right.’

‘So, you were right, there was something she wanted to hide.’  Hoss said thoughtfully, he sat down beside Adam on the trough ‘I’m sorry I wasn’t too sympathetic.  I believed in her.’  he looked sad as if his faith in his judgement had been shaken.

Adam touched his arm ‘Don’t feel so bad about it, she must have some of the qualities you saw or she wouldn’t be backing out now.  I wonder what she is going to tell Pa, if anything?

‘If Pa’s upset, I’m leaving home.’  Joe groaned.

Hoss got to his feet purposefully,  ‘Come on you two, let’s get the work finished, I could do with some fish for supper.’  Talk of food always made him feel better.

 

Chores finished, they persuaded Hop Sing to provide a picnic and walked the short distance to the creek where they had fished as children.   Hoss lay flat out on the grass and propped his fishing pole up against a tree with the hook dangling in the water.

Adam grinned ‘You expecting to catch anything like that?’ he asked.

Hoss squinted up at him ‘I leave all that energetic stuff to little brother, I came for a snooze.’

‘Well just don’t snore, it scares the fish away.’  Joe grumbled ‘You should have heard him last night Adam, it made the house shake.’

Adam looked up stream a little ‘Hey, Joe let’s leave him to sleep and go up to the bend, there’s usually some nice trout where the water is calmer.’

Hoss settled more comfortably, ‘Suits me, wake me when its time to go and eat what you’ve caught.’  he closed his eyes and ignored the faces his brothers made as they walked off.

‘Adam, I wanted to say thanks for talking to Scotty.  He wouldn’t have spoken up if you hadn’t done that.  I’m really grateful.’  Joe said quietly as they walked.

Adam put an arm around his brother’s shoulder ‘You at least deserved the truth to be told and Scotty’s not such a bad kid he just got into bad company.’

‘Kinda like me.’  Joe said looking up at his older brother with concern.

Adam smiled ‘Hopefully, you weren’t in as far as Scotty, but yes, I guess you could say it’s the same.  And remember Scotty doesn’t have a family to support for him the way you do, his Pa doesn’t care what happens to him.’

They walked in silence for a moment as Joe considered what Adam had said.

‘Will he go to jail?’  he asked.

‘Maybe not, I’ll try to speak for him.  It’s Travis that Roy really wants locked up.’

Adam moved away from Joe and began looking into the creek for fish.  When he found a good spot, he baited his hook and cast it out into the stream,  then settled down on a rock to wait. He watched his young brother make his cast, and remain standing at the water’s edge.  Joe was obviously still worried about the fire and the consequences and Adam wanted to reach out to him, but wasn’t sure how to go about it.  Often when his brother had been in trouble in the past and he had tried to talk, Joe thought he was being smug or interfering.

‘Why don’t you come up here, its shady and peaceful.’  he started.

Joe turned around and grinned ‘Afraid I might catch more than you from here?’

‘No chance, today I’m going to provide supper.’  his brother laughed.

Joe backed up to the rock and leaned against it while watching his float. ‘Like to bet on it, big brother.’

Adam shook his head ‘Nope, the way my luck’s been running lately, I’d lose.’

‘Yours and mine, both.’  Joe said quietly.

Adam decided if he was going to say anything it had to be now ‘ Pa was pretty hard on you, was he?’  he said softly.

For a moment he thought Joe wouldn’t answer, the sound of the stream was all that he could hear.

‘Yeah, he was……but I guess I deserved it.  I should have stayed away from Travis.’ he said softly.

‘Why didn’t you?’  Adam said gently probing further.

Joe sighed ‘Oh, I don’t know.  I guess I thought he was grown up and it made me feel good to be included with older boys.’  he looked up at his older brother,  ‘Why is growing up so difficult.’

His expression was so serious and world weary that Adam almost laughed, but stopped himself just in time.

‘ I don’t know buddy, when I manage it, I’ll tell you the secret.’

He reached out and was about to ruffle Joe’s hair as he had done so often in the past, then he realised that at this moment it would reinforce Joe’s belief that he was still a child.  He dropped his hand on to his brother’s shoulder and gave it a squeeze.

‘Don’t get too down about it.  You faced up to what you did and its over now.’

Joe was quiet for a moment as if trying to put his thoughts into words.

‘Its not over.’ his voice was barely above a whisper.

Adam looked puzzled ‘What do you mean?  You told Pa everything, didn’t you?’

Joe nodded and Adam breathed a sigh of relief, for a moment he thought there was more to come.

‘OK,  you owned up, the court decided you should help out Charlie as a punishment, and although you haven’t said so, I guess Pa gave you a tanning and a fairly lengthy lecture, right?’

‘Yes he did, but……’  Joe’s voice trailed away.

‘You’ve paid ,and I ‘d say pretty heavily, for your mistakes now you start fresh.’  he slid down from the rock, dropping his fishing pole and putting his arm around Joe’s shoulders.

‘What’s still bothering you?’

Joe shrugged off the arm and walked a little way towards the creek ‘He said he was ashamed of me…….’

Adam bit his bottom lip and tried to think of the right thing to say ‘What are you going to do about it?’

Joe looked up quickly ‘What can I do?  He doesn’t trust me anymore and …..’ his voice faltered. ‘…. he doesn’t care about me.’

Adam grabbed him by the shoulders ‘Don’t ever say that.  If he didn’t care he wouldn’t have punished you.  If he didn’t care he wouldn’t have been with you in court or paid Charlie’s damages.  He cares a hell of a lot about all of us.’

Joe angrily shrugged off his brother’s hands ‘The only thing he cares about is Ruth.  You should know that better than any of us.  He threw you out because of her.’

Adam pursed his lips, wondering how to explain things to his little brother, when he barely understood his motives, himself.

‘Pa didn’t exactly throw me out.  I could have stayed if I had apologised to Ruth.  Leaving was my decision, just as going up to the lake instead of facing him on Saturday, was yours.’  he walked around so that he was facing his little brother.

‘Pa loves Ruth.  He loves us too but its different.  I wish I could explain what being in love does to you, but I don’t understand it myself, someday you’ll just know what I mean.’  he stopped and became pensive.

‘Pa explained it to me once before, years ago.  He said that love isn’t like a cake that has to be divided up in portions, where if one person has a large slice everyone else has a small one.  It’s as large as you want to make it.’  he held Joe’s puzzled gaze for a moment  ‘He told me that just because he loved Marie, it didn’t mean there was less for Hoss and me.  I know what you are going through because I’ve been there and I know it hurts.’  he knelt down and looked directly into Joe’s troubled face ‘Do you understand what I’m trying to say.’

Joe looked away ‘I guess so……but its not just that.  Before, when I got in trouble and he was angry he always yelled at me and then everything was OK.  This time he is different, he was upset and disappointed in me.  I don’t think it is ever going to be the same.’

Adam gripped him firmly by the shoulders ‘Then you have to show him that you meant it when you said you were sorry, not just say it.’  he took a deep breath ‘We both do.’

Joe gave him a puzzled look. ‘You too?’

‘Yep, me too.  I plan to tell him what I know, show him the telegram and then tell him that if he goes ahead with the wedding, he has my blessing and I will never mention any of this again.’  he relaxed a little ‘That way I figure I have been true to what I believe.’

‘You mean he’ll still marry her, even after you tell him?’  Joe’s voice showed his disbelief.

‘Like I said, love does strange things to people.’  he grinned at Joe, in a couple of years you’ll understand that better, if you don’t already!’

‘Do you love Katie?’  Joe suddenly sprung on him.

Adam raised his eyebrows ‘What a question?’  he stopped to consider the right answer, knowing that his relationship with his brother depended on giving a reply that showed he was taking him seriously as an adult.

‘No, I don’t think I do.  I like her a lot, she s interesting to be with, but no, I don t think I love her.   He sighed  In any case when Angie gets through with her little attack of revenge, it won’t matter much what I feel.’ he said ruefully  ‘I guess both of us are going to go on paying for our mistakes for a while.’

‘Talking of paying, Hoss is going to make us pay heavily, if he doesn’t get a fish supper and neither of us have caught anything yet.’  he picked up his pole and made another cast.

‘Believe me Joe, it will turn out right in the end.  We just have to prove to Pa that we are really sorry and want to make the family work, with or without Ruth.’

But Joe wasn’t listening he was pulling in a large fish and concentrating on just that.  Adam smiled and tried to do the same without much luck.

 

Ben called at the hotel in the middle of the morning but Tom Madigan told him that Mrs Walsh had gone out earlier and he didn’t know when she would return.  He wandered outside unsure of what to do, he had prepared a speech which he needed to give before his courage left him.  He went over to the Silver Dollar and ordered a beer, looking around for a friendly face to pass the time with, but the saloon was quiet.  He noticed a man at a corner table watching him and wondered if he should know him, he seemed vaguely familiar but couldn’t put a name to him.

‘Roy Coffee been in today, Sam?’  he asked

Sam moved up the bar and shook his head ‘Haven’t seen him today, but if you need the law Clem was around earlier.’

‘No, it was Roy I wanted to see.’  Ben finished his beer and wandered into the street.  He wanted to talk to Roy to make sure that there were no strains on their friendship because of the court case.  As he stood uncertainly outside the saloon, he saw Ruth coming out of the stage line offices.

‘Ruth,  Ruth.’  he called after her, and hurried up the street to catch her.

Ruth heard him and turned around.

‘I called at the hotel but Tom didn’t know where you had gone.  I need to talk to you.’

‘I want to talk to you too, but not here.  Let’s go back to my hotel room.’  her voice was serious and there was no smile for him this morning.

They walked in silence back to the International Hotel and Ruth collected her key.  Ben followed her up the stairs and waited while she unlocked the door.  Once inside she removed her bonnet and walked to the window.

‘Ruth I want to talk to you about the wedding…….’  Ben started.

She held up her hand ‘Please Ben, there is something I must tell you first.’  her voice faltered ‘I’m not sure how to put this so I will just say it bluntly.  I deceived you, I’m not exactly who you think I am.’  she reached into a carpet bag and handed him a small pencil drawing.

Ben held it for a moment and it was as if the pieces of a puzzle were falling into place.

‘Elizabeth drew this of me, the summer before we were married.  She said it was for her cousin to show her what I looked like.’  he looked questioningly at her ‘You re her cousin Ruth.  I never made the connection before, I suppose I had forgotten the name.’

‘Yes, my father was Samuel Stoddard, Abel’s brother.   She was wringing her hands anxiously as she spoke.

‘Adam said our meeting was a strange coincidence.’  he looked at Ruth ‘Was it a coincidence?’

She shook her head ‘My brother Gideon, planned it.  He heard about you and the ranch when he was in San Francisco and sent for me to come out here.  He has enormous debts and he saw it as a way out of his troubles.’

Ben nodded thoughtfully ‘You expected me to approach you on the boat because of your likeness to Liz.  What if I hadn’t?’ he looked up from the picture, his face devoid of emotion.

‘Gid knew how much Liz meant to you, he was sure it would work.’  she said softly.

‘….and it did.  You must have been very pleased with your scheme, when I asked you to marry me.’  he said sharply.

Ruth’s face showed the pain she was experiencing at his harsh words.

‘You have every right to be angry, but please hear me out.  I went along with Gid’s scheme to start with but when I got to know you, I fell in love.  I knew I should leave and I tried,  believe me I tried, but I couldn’t do it.  Last night I told Gid that I wanted no more to do with him.  He’s probably drinking himself into a stupor in some saloon now.’

‘The Silver Dollar.’  Ben said absently, recalling where he had seen the man before, twenty six years before.

She didn’t seem to hear him and continued talking.

‘I’ve booked passage on the stage east, I leave tomorrow.’  she looked up at him in silent appeal, wanting him to tell her not to go.

The silence seemed to last for an age and when Ben eventually broke it, all her hopes died.

‘At least that makes what I have to say easier for me.  I came to explain that I wanted to cancel the wedding.’  he struggled to keep his voice calm and controlled ‘You were right I was trying to recapture the past, I fell in love with Liz all over again.  But you aren’t Elizabeth and last night she pointed out the mistake I was about to make, thinking that you could take her place.’

Ruth looked at him in astonishment, tears in her eyes and on her cheeks ‘She pointed out, what on earth do you mean?’

‘You wouldn’t understand, and because you don’t understand that, you could never understand me or the boys.’  he said softly.  ‘I’m sorry Ruth, it wouldn’t work, you must know that as well as I do?’

Sadly she nodded ‘Maybe in time you won’t think so badly of me.  I really did come to love you very much.’

He reached out and touched her hand ‘Maybe if you hadn’t tried to be so much like her, it could have worked,  I have a feeling that I might have liked the real Ruth Stoddard if I had got to know her.’

He left her standing at the window watching him as he crossed the street and headed home.  She knew he was going to those he really loved, his sons.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 20

 

 

Ben heard the laughter and joking long before the boys opened the front door and it did him good to hear three voices.  None of them expected their father to be home yet and Joe was teasing Adam about the poor catch he had made.

‘You should have thrown it back, its too little to leave its Mama.’  he pointed at the one small fish his brother held.

Adam reacted by reaching out to grab Joe, who dodged into the house and they both fell through the door together laughing.  As they picked themselves up they became aware of Ben standing over them, he had got up from his chair at the sound of their voices and had been  about to open the door.  For a moment there was an uncomfortable silence.

‘Looks like somebody got some supper.’  Ben said brightly pointing at Joe’s more substantial catch.

Adam and Joe let out a collective breath as Hoss breezed in and slam the door causing Ben to shake his head and the other two to smile.

‘You will eat with us won’t you Adam?’  Ben said quietly.

‘I’d like to, I need to talk to you.’  Adam replied equally quietly.

‘Don’t know why the rest of us go fishing, Joe always catches more than the rest of us put together.’  Hoss said taking off his hat and throwing it on the table completely oblivious to any tension.

‘You can’t catch much lying on the bank snoring.’  Adam grinned.

‘You can’t catch much anyhow!’  Joe giggled.

‘A little more respect for your elders, kid.’  Adam growled at him grabbing him by the ear.  ‘I found the best spot for you to do the work, its called supervising.’

‘Yeah, you two are good at that.’ Joe replied pulling away from his older brother.  ‘How about helping me clean them?’  Joe started for the kitchen calling for Hop Sing.

‘Joe, you and Hoss go ahead.  I want to talk to Adam.’  Ben moved over to a chair by the fireplace and indicated for Adam to join him.

Hoss raised his eyebrows in Adam’s direction before following Joe into the kitchen.

Adam took the chair indicated but remained sitting on the edge of the seat, a little worried about how he was going to tackle the news he had for his father.  However, Ben gave him no chance to say anything.

‘I thought you should be the first to know that Ruth and I are not getting married.’  Ben said bluntly.

Adam’s mouth dropped open then closed with a snap. ‘I’m sorry.  Can I ask why?’ he said puzzled at the matter of fact way his father had made the statement, with no emotion, at least on the surface.

‘You were right.  I was reaching for a memory and Ruth was hiding something.  But it doesn’t much matter now, she is going back to east.’  he sighed and gazed across at the desk.

Adam followed his glance but could not see what had attracted it.

‘You said you wanted to talk to me?’  Ben queried, bringing his thoughts back to the present.

Adam cleared his throat self-consciously ‘I guess you already know what I was going to tell you, but I got this from grandfather.’  he held out the flimsy telegram.

Ben took it and read it twice before looking up ‘You were so sure you were right that you telegraphed him?’

Adam shook his head ‘I didn’t know anything until Roy showed me the wanted poster on Gideon Stoddard, up to then it was just blind prejudice, I guess.  I’m sorry I was so difficult.’

His father waved away his apology. ‘Forget it, it worked itself out in the end. I was just rather slow in seeing the truth.’  For a moment he looked concerned  ‘You are staying, aren’t you?’

Adam looked down at his boots ‘If you’ll have me back?’

Ben grinned ‘I may need you around to bring me back to earth if any other women turn my head.  As I recall you are rather good at telling me their bad points, even when they don’t have any.’

Adam returned the grin ‘That’s not fair Pa, the first time I was only twelve……’ he stopped and looked toward the kitchen.

‘Something else bothering you?’

‘Yeah,  its about Joe.’  he paused ‘I know I shouldn’t interfere, but…….he’s still pretty upset.’

‘He seemed cheerful enough just now.’  Ben observed.

‘Maybe on the surface, but deep down he’s worried that you haven’t forgiven him. He’s had a pretty hard time the last few days.  He needs to see that you care.’   Adam knew he was sticking his neck out again but he had to say it.

‘Oh, supporting him in court and paying up a substantial sum to Charlie means I don’t care does it.’  his smile told Adam that he wasn’t angry at him for suggesting it.

‘I told him that, but I don’t think he believed me.’

‘ Well, I’ll see what I can do.  Unless of course you think you can do better?  You seem to have developed a habit of criticising my decisions lately.’  Ben watched his son with half closed eyes.

‘I didn’t mean it to be a criticism, sir.’  Adam said quickly.

Ben laughed ‘Don’t always take things so seriously, son.  I can’t be too bad a parent, I guess you turned out Ok.’

He got up and put his arm around Adam’s shoulders.  ‘Why don’t we go and see if that hard done by son of mine caught enough fish for supper?’

 

There was enough fish and supper was a light hearted meal for the first time in  a long while.   Ben praised the fisherman and was rewarded by a smile from his youngest son.  He explained briefly to Hoss and Joe that Ruth was going back east without giving them any details and Joe, at least, breathed a sigh of relief.  When supper was over and the dishes cleared away, they gathered in the living room.  Ben went to pour a brandy for himself and offered one to Adam.

‘Just a small one Pa, I have been drinking rather too much whisky lately.’  Adam replied.

Ben raised his eyebrows ‘We’ll have to keep you busy that way you won’t be able to find the time for whisky or …… the dubious company.’

Adam gave a wry smile ‘I wondered how long it would take for the gossip to get back to you.’

Ben handed him the brandy glass and raised one eyebrow  ‘What gossip? I haven’t heard any, it was just an observation. Is there something specific, I should know?’  he looked at Adam with a hint of a smile on his lips.

Joe and Hoss grinned at each other, Adam had walked right into the trap.

He cleared his throat ‘Nothing special Pa, just that some of the company probably wouldn’t meet with your approval.’  He was aware that he was blushing, which was an unusual experience for him.

Ben grunted and swirled his brandy around the glass before taking a sip.  ‘Well maybe staying out of town for a while will quieten any gossip.  I’ll see that you’re kept busy.’

Adam blushed again, he had a feeling that he was being disciplined without his father actually saying so.  It was a long time since his father had confined him to the ranch but that was what it sounded like, and he smiled at the thought.

There was a few moments silence. Ben seemed to gather his thoughts and make a conscious decision to ask the question   ‘I may not like the answer to this question, but I have to ask it.  Would you have come back if the telegram had proved you wrong?’

Adam took a sip of his brandy and considered the question carefully ‘If I’m honest, I really don’t know.  All I can say is that I decided to come back and stay whatever the outcome of the news.  If you had gone ahead with the wedding anyway, I would have apologised to Ruth.  Its strange because it was as if someone decided that for me and pushed me into coming back.’

‘Thank you for telling me, and I hope in future none of us ever need to be anything less than honest.  I am sorry that I shut you all out.  I was obsessed with a memory and I couldn’t or wouldn’t see what that was doing to the family.  I can only ask you to forgive me.’

Adam stretched his long legs out across to the table ‘What made you change your mind?’  he stopped and glanced at his father’s face ‘I’m sorry its none of my business, I shouldn’t have asked.’

Ben got to his feet and made his way over to the desk, he reached into the top drawer and withdrew the three gold framed pictures.  He set two pictures up on the desk and held the third in his hand.

‘I can’t really tell you because I don’t know.  It started when I held your mother’s picture one day and it grew until I was confused, doubting my feelings, questioning Ruth’s motives and my own.  Then last night I was in your room….  he glanced up at his son apologetically, but Adam waved away the gesture  ….. and I picked up ‘Paradise Lost’.  he stopped and a strange calmness seemed to envelope him.

Adam stared at his father, not wishing to break the spell that appeared to be holding him.

Ben continued very softly  ‘I read a little and fell asleep and when I awoke this morning it all seemed so straightforward.  I knew that the right thing to do was to explain to Ruth and cancel the wedding.’

‘Then you didn’t know who she was until after you made up your mind?’  Adam asked.

‘No, she told me what she and Gideon had planned at the hotel this morning.  It would have made no difference, if I had really loved her.  But what I loved wasn’t Ruth Walsh it was a memory, a voice from the past.

He gave a deep sigh and then smiled at all three boys.

‘I guess I have a lot to make up for with all three of you.’  he looked down at Liz’s picture and fingered the frame thoughtfully.

‘ There’s just one thing that still puzzles me.’   ‘I must have handled these pictures a million times over the years but I never noticed that this frame was damaged until I came back from San Francisco with Ruth.’  he caught the look that passed between his three sons ‘Have any of you any idea how it got damaged?’

Adam took a large swallow of brandy ‘Well, Pa that’s a long sad story, we thought you wouldn’t want to hear.’

Ben gave a small smile ‘Oh, but I do. We have all night.  I’m sure there is time for you to tell it.’

THE END