Summary:  An adolescent Joe tries to find out about the upstairs rooms in the saloon.
Rating:  G  14,300 words

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The Kissing Rooms

 

 

‘So?  What’s it like?’ asked Little Joe Cartwright in a soft voice as he leant close to his friend. ‘Did ya get a good look?’

 

Mitch shook his head mournfully. ‘Nah!  Didn’t get any kind of a look at all!  My Pa saw me near the door and shooed me away.  How was I to know he was in there?’

 

Joe sighed. ‘Probably wouldn’t have made any difference anyway,’ he said with a frown. ‘There’s always someone else in there who’d do it for him, and then probably tell on you into the bargain.’

 

They stared mournfully at the saloon from their vantage place across the street. ‘Say Joe?’ asked Mitch after a moment. ‘How about asking one of your brothers. They might tell you.’

 

Joe looked at him sceptically. ‘Why don’t you ask one of yours?  For the same reason Mitch…. They wouldn’t tell me and then they’d probably go back and tell Pa. Imagine what he’d have ta say about it!’

 

Mitch nodded his head. ‘Probably the same thing my Pa would,’ he agreed. ‘I have a feeling it wouldn’t be so much what he’d say as what he’d do.’  He rubbed the back of his pants absentmindedly.

 

‘Yeah!  Well, I don’t want ta hear about it…..I’ve already done that.  I told ya, I’m gonna get a look at it!’ Joe said determinedly.

 

‘How?’

 

‘I dunno. We have ta give this some thought,’ Joe replied.  ‘We have ta try and find a way ta get in there when there’s not many people around.’

 

‘Hey Joe!  We could start a diversion!’

 

Joe looked at him sceptically. ‘How?’ he said. ‘Just what could we do ta get everyone outta there?’

 

‘I don’t know! We…’ Mitch stopped and clicked his fingers. ‘I’ve got it!  How about during the Church Service on Sunday?  None of our families and their friends would be anywhere near the Bucket of Blood on a Sunday morning, and anyone who was in there at that time wouldn’t care about us!’

 

Joe frowned. ‘Yes, that’s true,’ he said thoughtfully. ‘But just how are we supposed ta get away from the Service with all our families there?  Pa would never let me miss Church!’

 

‘He would if you were sick!’ said Mitch excitedly.  ‘We could both pretend ta be sick and when they’d left home we could come straight here.  We could have a good look at the picture and be back in bed before they even knew we’d left.’

 

‘I don’t know…’ said Joe. ‘My Pa’s pretty good at working out if I’m faking it or not.’

 

‘Well it’s worth a try ain’t it?’ said Mitch. ‘We’ve got nothing ta lose and look what we’d be gaining!’

 

Joe’s eyes shone. ‘Yeah, you’re right.  A look at that picture would be worth the risk I reckon.’  He turned to his friend. ‘Do ya really think its… you know, like what they say?’

 

‘Of course it is!’ said Mitch. ‘You heard the Lupis boys talking about it as well as I did!’

 

Joe nodded. ‘Is she completely naked, d’ya think?’

 

Joe!’ Mitch looked around as if the walls themselves might reach out and hit them. ‘Don’t say it out loud!’

 

‘Well! If we’re gonna sneak a look at it we have ta get used ta the idea!’ said Joe.

 

‘Yeah well you don’t have ta broadcast it around!’

 

The two boys stepped off the sidewalk and sauntered over the street towards the Saloon.  They casually leant against the doorframe and tried to peek over the top of the swinging doors but drew back quickly when Mitch tugged at Joe’s arm. ‘Shh!  My Pa’s still in there!’

 

They took a few steps away and leant against the hitching rail instead. ‘Say Joe, how old were your brothers when you Pa let them go into a Saloon for the first time?’ asked Mitch.

 

‘Bout my age I reckon,’ replied Joe. ‘It’s not that he won’t let me in a Saloon of course, it’s just that back room that’s the problem.’

 

Mitch nodded. ‘Yeah me too. Pa says I’m at the age when he’ll let me have a drink, but nothing more. I reckon he means that picture too.’

 

Joe nodded. ‘That’s why they keep it in the back. So that if someone young like us comes in we don’t get ta see it.’

 

‘Well I reckon I’m old enough even if my Pa don’t agree with me!’ declared Mitch.

 

‘I’m definitely old enough!’ agreed Joe. ‘I can handle it!’

 

‘Hey Joe, what do ya reckon it’s like?’ asked Mitch.

 

‘What’s what like?’ said a quiet voice behind them.  They both jumped and turned together to see Joe’s older brother Adam standing behind them leaning against a post.

 

Joe swallowed. ‘Oh, hi Adam!’ he said with a guilty grin.

 

‘What’s what like?’ repeated Adam with a sardonic look.

 

‘Nothing.  Just wondering what that new horse that Mitch’s brother bought will be like,’ said Joe without hesitating.

 

‘Uh huh,’ said Adam slowly. ‘And why are you both wondering about it outside the Bucket of Blood?’

 

Joe shrugged. ‘Just happened to end up standing here,’ he said. ‘What’s it ta you where we stand anyways?’

 

‘Have you forgotten you were supposed to be helping me over at the Grain Store?’ replied his older brother. ‘I’ve finished loading up and you haven’t done a thing so far.’

 

‘Oh!  Sorry Adam, I guess I forgot,’ said Joe with his best attempt at his charming smile. ‘I’ll come straight away.’

 

‘You sure will!’ said Adam, grabbing him by the shoulder. ‘Say goodbye Mitch.  My younger brother is about to leave you.’

 

Joe looked over his shoulder as he was propelled along the sidewalk. ‘Yeah, bye Mitch!’ he said. ‘We’ll talk in school tomorrow about that idea.’

 

‘What idea?’ asked Adam as he continued to push him along.  Just what have you two got brewing up now?’

 

‘Us?’ said Joe with a wide-eyed innocent look. ‘Nothing!  Just something ta do with our school work that’s all.’

 

Adam stared at him. ‘Yeah right!’ he said.

 

 

—————-

 

 

During the next few days at school the two boys refined their plans.  They gave great thought to the symptoms they would develop and resolved that the best way to approach the issue was slowly.  Both had fathers who had been caught before in their lies about not being well, and they didn’t want to risk not being believed this time.

 

‘We can’t do the fever bit,’ said Joe thoughtfully. ‘It’s too hard ta fake.’

 

‘Yeah,’ replied Mitch. ‘Remember that time you tried to hold your face over the lamp to get your temperature up just before your Pa came into see you?  You nearly blistered all the skin on your face.’

 

‘And he nearly blistered all the skin on my backside for doing it,’ said Joe ruefully.  ‘No I think something less dramatic this time, but more effective. I think a few aches and pains in the right places is the best idea, but we have ta build up ta it gradually.  Start with a headache first, and then go to the stomach.  Oh, and don’t eat much – that helps too.  Just keep acting real weak-like and say you want ta sleep.’

 

Mitch looked at him admiringly. ‘Gee Joe, you really know how to do this, don’t ya?’

 

Joe nodded, trying to look modest. ‘Yeah well, I’ve got away with a time or two Mitch. Just takes experience that’s all.  We’d best start tonight I think, otherwise we won’t convince em by Sunday.’

 

Mitch nodded. ‘OK.  Hey Joe, it’s exciting isn’t it? Bet it’ll be worth all the effort.’

 

Joe nodded absentmindedly. ‘Ya know Mitch since we’ve been making these plans, I’ve been doing a bit of observing.  Have you noticed Margaret  Simpson’s ….. um…. well… what do ya call em anyways?’

 

‘Bosoms,’ said Mitch with the superior air of someone who lived in a house with females. ‘They’re called bosoms.’

 

‘Yeah? Well whatever they’re called, they’re kinda different to others ya know?’  He stared across the playground at the large girl who was skipping with her friends. ‘Did ya know they come in different sizes?’

 

‘Hadn’t noticed to tell the truth,’ said Mitch thoughtfully. ‘But now you come to mention it…. her’s aren’t bigger than Miss Jones’ though.’

 

Joe looked at him shocked. ‘Have you been checking out our teacher’s?’

 

Just a bit,’ he said going red. ‘Haven’t you?’

 

‘I try not ta look at her at the best of times,’ said Joe disgustedly. ‘Why would I? She’s ugly.’

 

‘She may be ugly in the face,’ said Mitch, ‘but you just gotta take a look Joe!  It’s worth it!’

 

Joe looked at him thoughtfully and opened his mouth, but just as he was about to speak the bell interrupted him and he closed it again as he stood up. ‘Now don’t forget Mitch, start with the headache tonight, but don’t overdo it, OK?’

 

‘OK,’ said the other boy.

 

Later that afternoon as Joe sat in his usual position looking out of the window, he thought about what Mitch had said about Miss Jones. Adam always maintained that the teacher had nothing whatsoever going for her, but then that was probably because she made advances to him every time they came into contact. Maybe Adam had missed her large bosom?

 

‘Joseph Cartwright!’ A shrill voice cut across his thoughts and the person that had been on his mind came into view. ‘Why are you staring out of the window Joseph when your work is not finished?’

 

He looked up at her, his eyes not reaching above her neckline as she bent towards him. Well what do you know….. Mitch had been right!  How had Adam missed it?

 

‘Sorry ma’am,’ he mumbled as he bent over his work again. Furtively, he watched as Miss Jones seated herself again at her desk and began to mark their books. Now that he thought about it her bosom was rather large to say the least, and even though she had covered it up with a high-necked dress it was obviously bulging to get out from under the material.

 

Abigail looked up and saw him staring at her. ‘Joseph Cartwright!  How many times do I have to tell you?  The work isn’t plastered all over my face you know!’  she said crossly.

 

Joe turned a slight shade of red and bent over his book again. He thought he’d better be careful if he was to stay out of trouble.  He couldn’t risk anything going wrong between now and Sunday!

 

 

——————-

 

 

Joe sat quietly at the supper table pushing the food around his plate.  At least I don’t have ta fake this bit! he thought. Food had never rated highly on Joe’s list of priorities anyway, so doing without was no hardship to him.

 

‘Joseph at least eat something!’ said his father crossly.

 

Joe looked up at his father with sad eyes. ‘I just can’t Pa.  I don’t feel like anything ta eat.  I’ve got a bad headache.’ He rubbed his head for extra effect.

 

Ben leant over to him and felt his forehead. ‘You don’t seem to have a fever,’ he said. ‘When did this start?’

 

‘This afternoon,’ Joe said with a sigh. ‘Don’t worry Pa, I’ll be all right.  Maybe an early night will fix me up.’

 

Ben looked worried. ‘I hope so,’ he said. ‘I think you’d better go up to bed straight away.’

 

Joe stood up and tried to look miserable. ‘All right,’ he said in a small voice. ‘Goodnight everyone.’

 

Adam looked at him suspiciously as he went up the stairs. ‘That was a bit sudden, don’t you think?’ he said. ‘He was all right before supper.’

 

Ben raised an eyebrow in his direction, but said nothing. ‘Well something’s wrong if he’s volunteering to go to bed before his usual time,’ said Hoss with his mouth full.

 

‘Hmm,’ said Adam. ‘Well I’ll bet he suddenly can’t find it in him to go to school tomorrow.  There’s something behind this.’

 

But Adam was proven wrong the next morning. Part of the plan of course was that the boys couldn’t make it look too obvious, and trying to get out of school would have raised their families’ suspicions.  So it was with many a sigh and painful rubbing of his head that Joe insisted that he was well enough to make it through the day at school. ‘No, I’m sure I’ll be OK,’ he said quietly. ‘It’s only a headache Pa. Nothing much ta worry about.’

 

Ben didn’t argue. ‘All right then son, but take it easy today.’

 

‘I will. Bye.’  Joe stood up from the table and grinned as he turned his back on his father and brothers and headed for the door. You are so good at this Joe Cartwright…you’ve got them all just where you want them now.

 

‘So how’d it go?’ he asked Mitch when they got to school.

 

‘Good,’ the other boy replied. ‘Worse thing is though that I’m hungry. I hardly had anything to eat at all.’

 

‘You’ll get used ta it,’ said Joe. ‘Remember not ta eat too much lunch either.’

 

 

—————

 

 

 

‘Joseph, Hop Sing tells me you didn’t eat much lunch today,’ said Ben with a worried expression on his face. ‘He said you brought most of it home with you. Now this just can’t go on.’

 

Joe turned a mournful look on his father. ‘I tried Pa, but I just couldn’t,’ he said. The pain’s in my stomach now.’

 

Ben looked really concerned. ‘I think you’d better stay home from school tomorrow and I’ll get Paul Martin out here to take a look at you,’ he said.

 

Joe flinched.  The doctor was definitely not a part of his plan.  He was an expert at telling when Joe was faking it, and he just couldn’t take the risk. ‘No Pa, I’m sure I’ll be OK.  I’m just tired and need an early night.’

 

Adam spluttered into his coffee cup. ‘Another one?’ he said, ‘Now I know you’re sick!’

 

Joe glared at him. ‘May I be excused?’ he said to his father as he stood up from the table.

 

Later that evening as he lay in bed he thankfully remembered that tomorrow was Friday and he only had one more day to do this.  The early nights were definitely the hardest thing for him to endure, but he knew that the worst was still to come. Saturday was going to be the most difficult day to get through, as there would be no hiding at school from the eagle eyes of his father and brothers. He wondered how to manage it.  Perhaps he should insist on spending the day in bed?  No, they would think he was trying to get out of his chores.  Best to just go about sadly and slowly as if he were feeling bad, but not enough for that nosey old Doc Martin to come out.

 

Saturday morning saw the final stages of the plan unfold.  The boys had made their last minute arrangements at the school the day before, and had agreed to meet in the alleyway beside the saloon.  They were so close to attaining their goal now that it was beginning to get really exciting, and they were both determined that nothing would get in the way of their objective.

 

‘Joseph?’ Ben asked at the breakfast table. ‘How are you feeling today son?’

 

Joe gave his father the look he had practically perfected over the past few days. ‘Much the same Pa,’ he said in a small voice. ‘The aches are still there in my stomach and my head, but they ain’t too bad.’

 

‘Perhaps you should spend the day in bed,’ his father suggested.

 

‘No Pa, I’ll be OK.  I’d like ta get my chores done now if that’s OK.’

 

‘No Joe, don’t worry about your chores today.  Your brothers can help you out for just this once.’

 

Joe shot a glance at Adam and Hoss who didn’t look too pleased with the suggestion.  He thought it best not to tempt fate, as Adam in particular had been giving him rather suspicious looks lately and he didn’t want him giving Pa the wrong idea. ‘No Pa, I’ll be OK,’ he replied quickly. ‘Really.’

 

Ben patted him on the arm. ‘All right son, but come inside if you feel any worse.’

 

‘I will.  I’ll get started on them now,’ Joe said as he stood up from the table.

 

‘There’s something not quite right here,’ said Adam as his younger brother closed the front door behind him. ‘That kid would normally do anything to get out of work.  This isn’t adding up.’

 

Ben glared at him. ‘Why can’t you just give the boy the benefit of the doubt?’ he said. ‘Maybe he is just growing up and becoming more responsible, have you thought of that?’

 

Adam smirked. ‘Yes I did think of that, but I don’t believe it,’ he replied.

 

‘Aw leave him alone Adam,’ said Hoss. ‘He’s not doing anyone any harm.’

 

‘Are you sure about that?’ replied Adam. ‘I’m not.’

 

During the rest of the morning Joe was careful to get all his chores done, but at a slower pace than usual.  Every time he sensed his father or brothers near him he would clutch at his stomach or head as if in pain, but seemingly struggle bravely to carry on.  The final straw came at the dinner table when his chores had been completed.  He was usually free on a Saturday afternoon to do as he liked, and could hardly wait to get out the door and onto Cochise to ride off for an afternoon of freedom fishing or just visiting with his friends, but today he suggested a nap instead.

 

Ben could hardly believe his ears. ‘Are you sure?’ he said incredulously.

 

‘Yes,’ said Joe. ‘I’ll just take it easy this afternoon Pa.  I’ll rest on the sofa if that’s OK with you.’

 

‘Fine,’ said Ben.

 

Joe chuckled to himself as he settled himself down with a book and made himself comfortable.  He figured that tomorrow was well worth a quiet afternoon today and could do with the extra sleep anyway.  He might need all his wits about him tomorrow, so it might be best to be well rested. Before ten minutes had passed he was fast asleep and spent a most enjoyable afternoon dreaming of huge bosoms swathed in voluminous red material coming at him from all angles, but each time he reached out to touch them Miss Jones’ face would appear and tell him to do his work again.  He woke up quite refreshed, but confused as to why his teacher should be in his mind so much lately.

 

 

——————–

 

 

Another early night found him on Sunday morning to be well rested and eager to get going with the plan.  As he lay in bed waiting for someone to come up and check on him he smiled contentedly to himself as he considered the sacrifices had been well worth it after all.  All that was left now was to put on the final touches, and he was well prepared to give the performance of his life.

 

Eventually his father did come in to see why he wasn’t downstairs for breakfast, and Joe went into full swing the moment he appeared at the door. ‘Hi Pa, he said in a tiny voice as he clutched at his stomach and curled up into a ball.

 

Joseph!’ said Ben with a worried look. ‘Don’t tell me you’re still not well?  This can’t go on any longer.’

 

‘I’m not too good Pa,’ he said acting like it was difficult to raise his head from the pillow.

 

‘You don’t look it,’ said Ben, sitting down on the edge of the bed and putting his hand on his son’s forehead. ‘I think you’d better stay here in bed this morning and rest. Don’t worry about Church today.’

 

‘If you think that’s best Pa,’ said Joe, marvelling at how easy it had been.  ‘I don’t like missing Church, but I’ll do what you think I should.’

 

Ben patted him on the arm. ‘The important thing is your health Joe,’ he said reassuringly. ‘I’ll ask Adam to stay home with you to make sure you’re all right.  He won’t mind.’

 

Joe’s eyes shot open. ‘Oh no Pa.  I couldn’t ask Adam ta do that!’ he said quickly. ‘It wouldn’t be right for him ta miss Church on accounta me.  No, I’ll just sleep for a bit – I’ll be OK.  Besides, Hop Sing will be downstairs.’

 

‘True,’ said Ben. ‘Are you sure you’ll be all right?  We’ll come back straight after the Service.’

 

You take your time Pa,’ said Joe. ‘I’ll be here when you come back.’ If all goes well, he thought.

 

‘Rest now son, I’ll see you at lunch time then,’ said Ben as he got up and made for the door.  Joe closed his eyes and sighed as he felt his father giving him an anxious look. As the door closed behind his father he could hardly contain his glee and sprang up from the bed immediately and headed for his chest of drawers.  As he dressed himself he hopped around the room trying to contain his giggles of excitement, anxious to get underway at long last.  He was stuffing the last of the clothing under his bedclothes to make it look like a body was still in the bed when he heard the sound of the buggy leaving the front yard.  He stole a quick look out of the window and checked that it contained his father and two brothers before he crept out and onto the roof.  He felt it was easier this way, as he was a little apprehensive about meeting Hop Sing downstairs if he left by the front door.  Normally on a Sunday Hop Sing kept a low profile and if Ben had told him not to disturb Joe then he wouldn’t, but he wasn’t prepared to take any risks.

 

Soon he was on his way to town, riding away from the main trail so as not to risk his father and brothers seeing him.  He rode as fast as he could, as he and Mitch had decided that the earlier they got there the better.  Mitch lived a lot closer to town than Joe did, and didn’t want to risk his father coming back too soon from church to find him gone.

 

The excitement was coursing through his veins as he waited in the alleyway.  Now that they were so close he found it almost impossible to contain himself and the realisation that they were about to see a naked woman kept flitting across his mind like a beacon. He wondered just what they would see, and hoped that the Lupis boys hadn’t been exaggerating in their description.

 

After a while he began to get fidgety. It was difficult being so close and yet so far from his goal and he began to wonder if Mitch was indeed coming.  Cautiously he poked his head out around the corner to see the passing traffic on the street.  There were many families in their buggies headed up the street towards the church and in the middle of them he could hardly believe his eyes as he saw the Devlin buggy with Mitch in the back seat.  He stared open-mouthed as it passed, and watched Mitch give him a hopeless look.  He raised his hands as if in despair and then turned away.

 

Joe shook his head as he slunk back into the alleyway.  Poor Mitch!  It seemed that his part of the plan hadn’t worked and his father either hadn’t believed him or insisted he go to Church anyway.  Joe wondered what to do.

 

Part of him wanted to get straight back home, as the thought of going into that back room by himself was too daunting.  But the larger part of him was determined to do as he had set out to.  After all was he going to waste all the efforts of the last few days just because he was a bit scared?  What was the worst that could happen to him?  They’d throw him out – so what?  All he needed was a glimpse and that wouldn’t take long.

 

He squared his shoulders, nonchalantly stepped out from the alleyway and headed towards the entrance.  The Bucket of Blood was not the high-class establishment the Silver Dollar Saloon was.  Even if his father had allowed him into a saloon by himself this would not have been the choice, as it was up in the less saloubrious end of town and frequented by mostly miners.  However, to Joe’s way of thinking that was one of its attractions.

 

He took a deep breath and entered.  The first thing that caught his eye was the lack of people.  He had expected there not to be many, as it was Sunday morning after all and even though the Saloons never shut most patrons made a long night of it on Saturdays and slept it off on Sundays.  The next thing that caught his eye was the woman sitting in the corner of the room. He had seen saloon girls of course before, but usually only from a distance or when he was in the company of his father and had never dared look too closely.  Now that he had the chance to see one close up, he found it fascinating.

 

She was blond, with blue eyes and a very red mouth.  He supposed that was some of that lipstick stuff that he’d heard about.  Her dress was red and only came to just below her knees, with fancy lace stuff all around it.  The top of it was very low cut and it was that which held his fascination as he looked at her bosom that showed plainly.  This was not a dress that Miss Jones would be caught wearing, of that he was sure.  There was definitely something about the way this woman looked that was enticing to him and in spite of himself he stood and stared at her for a full minute before he noticed her winking at him.  He blushed and turned towards the bar.

 

The bartender looked him up and down, smiling. ‘Yes?’ he said after a moment. Joe opened his mouth to talk and then shut it again. The bartender tried again. ‘Do ya want something sonny?’

 

Joe swallowed.  ‘A beer thanks,’ he said and put his money on the counter.

 

The man smiled at him. ‘Why don’t ya try somewhere else sonny?’ he said, still smiling.

 

‘No, I want a beer,’ he repeated, more forcefully this time.

 

‘Give him one Will,’ called the woman from the other side of the room. ‘What’s it to you anyway?’

 

The bartender gave her a sullen look and plonked the beer down on the bench.  Joe picked it up gratefully and turned towards the back room quickly.  He didn’t want to take any risks on being thrown out before he had the chance to attain his goal, and thought he may as well get in there as quickly as possible.

 

‘Hey, where are you going?’ said the woman as he passed her.

 

He gave her his best charming smile. ‘Just in here,’ he said, continuing to walk.  He heard her get up and come in behind him, and turned as he found a seat. He sat down and studied his beer, not daring to meet her eye.

 

‘Mind if I sit here?’ she asked.

 

He nodded, seemingly fascinated with what was in his glass. ‘Sure,’ he said, ‘help yaself.  They sat in silence for a moment and then Joe dared look up.  There in front of him was IT!  The picture in all its glory was hanging directly in front of him on the wall, and his eyes became riveted to it.

 

The Lupis boys for once had not been exaggerating. The woman was reclining on a settee with her arms above her head, totally naked!  For the first time in his life Joe was at a complete loss about what to think and sat open-mouthed staring at it.

 

The woman turned and noticed where he was gazing, then leant forward towards him. ‘First time you’ve seen a picture like that is it?’ she whispered. ‘She’s a bit of a legend around here you know.’

 

Joe dragged his gaze away from the picture.  ‘Nah,’ he said casually, ‘I’ve been in here plenty of times.’ He took a deep swig of his beer.

 

The woman looked at him closely. ‘Have you?’ she said with a smile. ‘That’s funny, I’ve never noticed you and I’ve been here for a few months now.’  She turned around. ‘How about you ladies?  Has anyone else noticed this handsome young man here before?’

 

Joe looked around and noticed for the first time that he was alone in the room with about six women, all dressed in similar fashion to the one sharing his table. He blushed.

 

A couple of the other women got up and headed over towards his table. ‘No I haven’t,’ said one, stroking him on the back of the neck. ‘I think I would have remembered a fine looking youngster like you if I had.’  She winked at the others.

 

‘Just how old are you boy?’ asked another.

 

Joe sat up straight. ‘Old enough,’ he said, wondering why they all laughed at his reply.  What’s the matter with them?  he wondered.  I’m old enough to have a beer and look at that picture if I want to!

 

‘Really?’ said another. ‘Well that’s good, because we’d hate to see a youngster like you going to waste would we girls?’

 

Joe wasn’t quite sure what she meant but figured she was trying to be friendly, so he merely grinned at her. The beer was beginning to make him feel rather relaxed and he felt quite at ease now.  The rest of the women clustered around him. ‘So what’s your name?’ one of them asked.

 

He gave her his best charming smile. ‘Joe,’ he said. ‘Pleased ta meet ya ladies.’

 

They laughed. ‘Isn’t that sweet!  He called us ladies!’ one of them said.  ‘What a lovely young thing he is!’

 

Joe’s grin got bigger.  He could feel that he was making quite a favourable impression on these women, and was enjoying the close-up look he was getting at their bosoms while he was doing it.  This was beginning to be even better than the picture on the wall, and he began to get excited about all the things he’d be able to tell Mitch.

 

‘So Joe,’ one of the women asked. ‘How much money have ya got honey?’

 

Joe fingered his change in his pocket, wondering if he had enough to buy them all a drink. They all looked mighty thirsty to him. ‘I’ve got about two dollars,’ he said. ‘I’m not sure if that’s enough.’

 

They laughed. ‘Not quite enough Joe,’ said one, leaning over him and breathing heavily near his neck. ‘That’s a shame isn’t it?’

 

‘Yeah,’ he agreed. ‘Sorry, but I didn’t think ta bring any more.  I didn’t know I’d need it for all of you.’

 

The laughter increased. ‘All of us?’ said the woman hanging around his neck. ‘It’s not enough for one of us honey!’

 

‘No?’ said Joe. ‘My beer only cost two bits!’

 

They all stared at him. ‘Well I do believe we have a little innocent here,’ said one of them. ‘Maybe we should help him out.’

 

‘Leave him alone Betsy,’ said the blonde woman seated at the table. ‘He’s only a kid.’

 

Joe glared at her. ‘I’m not a kid,’ he said. ‘I’m old enough ta come in here and have a drink and look at …I mean do what I want ta do!’

 

She leant over to him. ‘I think you should get out of here Joe,’ she said. ‘Run off home now.’

 

He sat back in his chair. ‘I’m quite comfortable thanks,’ he said. ‘I’m in no hurry.’

 

‘You tell her Joe,’ said one of the women. ‘You’re happy here with us aren’t you darling?’ She started to run her fingers through his hair.

 

Joe looked around at all the women surrounding him and was pleased to think he was the centre of attention. They all seemed to like him, and he was enjoying being so popular. ‘Yeah, I’m quite happy,’ he said with a big grin.

 

‘How’d you like to come upstairs on the house, so to speak?’ someone whispered in his ear.

 

Joe looked at her. ‘Upstairs?’ he said, not sure what she was hinting at. ‘Why’d I want ta do that?’

 

There was more laughter. ‘I could show you a good time honey,’ she whispered in his ear.

 

‘Yeah?’ he asked. ‘Doing what?

 

The laugher increased. ‘Well we’d think of something to keep us amused,’ she persisted. ‘Who knows, if you behaved yourself I might even let you kiss me!’

 

Joe swallowed and began to turn red. ‘I… um…. I……’ he gulped.

 

The blonde woman pushed the other one away. ‘I said to leave him alone!  He’s only a kid!’

 

The other woman glared back at her. ‘Why don’t you just mind your own business,’ she snarled. ‘It’s not every day we get a fine young man like this coming in here, is it girls?’  They all shook their heads, and several of them edged closer to Joe. ‘I think Joe here deserves a little education,’ she continued. ‘Would you like that Joe?’

 

Joe looked at her. Education? he thought.  Somehow he didn’t believe she meant the same thing that Miss Jones or Pa talked about when they said the word. Still, if it were a kiss she was meaning to give him, he wouldn’t be against it.  He had heard that it could be quite nice – at least that’s what the Lupis boys had said.  And after all they should know, for they had been found by Miss Jones kissing Margaret Simpson behind the outhouse once.

 

‘Sure,’ he said with more confidence than he felt. ‘I’ll love ta learn about kissing if you’ll teach me!’ There was more general laughter.

 

Just then he heard the sound of church bells ringing and realised with a start that he had stayed much too long.  The bells were the signal that the Service was over, and he would have to really rush to get home before his father and brothers now.  He stood up abruptly, all thoughts of the upstairs room dashed from his mind.

 

‘Sorry ladies, he said, edging towards the door. ‘But I gotta go now.’

 

‘You come back any time Joe,’ one of them called. ‘We’d be glad to give you that education darling.’

 

He smiled at her. ‘Thank you,’ he said politely. ‘I’ll try and come back for it.’

 

It was a scramble to get back to the ranch, but Joe managed it just in time.  He galloped Cochise full pelt across the hills avoiding the main trail in case he caught a glimpse of his father and brothers, and got safely into the barn before they had reached the yard.  He quickly unsaddled the horse and gave him a quick rubdown, not wanting anyone to notice the sweat on him, and then climbed back into his bedroom via the roof.  All the exertion and the beer had made him feel quite unsteady, so it was actually with great relief that he sank down under the covers when he had changed back into his nightshirt.

 

By the time Ben made it into his room Joe was actually snuggled down and half asleep.  He managed to half-open his eyes and look up at his father to smile at him. ‘Hi Pa,’ he said sleepily.

 

Ben leant over and stroked his curls. ‘Hello there young man, and how are you feeling?’

 

‘Tired,’ said Joe with a happy grin, the effects of the beer still on him.

 

‘Well you just keep resting for a while longer,’ said his father. ‘I’ll bring you up some lunch soon.’

 

‘Thanks Pa,’ Joe replied as he rolled over.

 

‘How is he?’ asked Hoss as Ben came downstairs.

 

‘He still seems to be unwell,’ said Ben with a worried look. ‘He’s very sleepy and seems to have a glazed look about him. I’m quite worried about him really. I think if he’s no better by tomorrow I’ll have Paul look him over.’

 

‘Good idea,’ said Hoss. ‘It’s not like Joe ta be this much under the weather.’

 

‘Hmm,’ said his father. ‘Something’s wrong with the boy.  I just hope he can get some sleep now.’

 

‘Well he seems to be,’ said Adam coming down the stairs. ‘I just looked in on him and he was snoring his head off.’

 

‘Good,’ said Ben. ‘Glad to hear it.’

 

Upstairs Joe was indeed snoring his head off, dreaming of big-bosomed ladies asking him for kisses.  He smiled contentedly as he rolled over onto his side.

 

 

——————-

 

 

‘Tell me again Joe,’ pleaded Mitch. ‘The bit about the picture first.’

 

Joe leant forward with a gleam in his eye. ‘Completely naked!’ he said.

 

‘Everything?’

 

Joe nodded. ‘Yes!  Bosoms and … everywhere else.’

 

‘Did you get a good look?’

 

‘I told you before, I was too busy getting asked to kiss them women,’ Joe boasted. ‘I didn’t have time for the picture when I had more important things on my mind.’

 

Mitch whistled. ‘I can’t believe it!  They really asked you to kiss them?’

 

Joe nodded. ‘Yep,’ he said proudly.  ‘Seemed real keen ta do it to.  That’s what they’ve got the rooms upstairs for I guess.’

 

‘I didn’t know there was any rooms upstairs,’ replied Mitch.

 

Joe shrugged. ‘They said there was. I reckon they’re the Kissing Rooms.’

 

‘Oh!’ said Mitch. ‘What a shame ya couldn’t have gone up to find out.’

 

‘Don’t worry, I will,’ replied Joe thoughtfully. ‘I’m not letting a chance ta kiss one of them ladies get away.  Do ya know what?  They said it would be a good education for me.’

 

‘Reckon so,’ said Mitch. ‘I mean, everyone needs to know how to kiss properly some time or other don’t they?  So I reckon you need to learn it just like you do maths and stuff.’

 

Joe scratched his head.  Somehow his friend’s argument didn’t seem quite logical to him, but he wasn’t prepared to argue the point. ‘Maybe,’ he said.  ‘Anyway, I gotta figure out a way ta get back in there.’

 

‘Joe you can’t!’  said Mitch. ‘It was hard enough the first time.  Besides my Pa didn’t believe me at all when it came right down to it.  I ended up in Church remember?’

 

‘There’s a way ta do it!’ said Joe thoughtfully. ‘I just gotta think about it.’

 

He was still thinking a while later outside the Mercantile Store while he waited for his brother Adam to finish loading up the supplies.  ‘Joe would you do something instead of just standing there?’ asked Adam irritably. ‘The whole idea of you meeting me here after school was for you to help load these things up, not watch me do it!’

 

Joe moved away from the post where he had been leaning while looking at the windows above the Bucket of Blood Saloon. ‘Sorry, he said as he lifted a sack.  ‘Hey Adam?’

 

‘Yes?’

 

‘What are those rooms up there above the Saloon?’

 

Adam looked in the direction his younger brother was pointing and became very busy with a large sack of flour. ‘Move out of the way will you?’ he said. ‘Let me get past.’

 

‘Sorry,’ said Joe moving quickly. After a moment he asked again. ‘Well? What are they?’

 

‘I’ve got ta check that we’ve got everything,’ said Adam going inside. ‘Get in the buckboard and wait for me.’

 

Joe sat on the buckboard and waited as he continued to look at the rooms.  Maybe Adam didn’t know what they were? He found that hard to believe though, because he knew for a fact that Adam had kissed many girls before.  After all, hadn’t he seen it with his own two eyes?  He was an expert at spying on his brother, sometimes to his own detriment.

 

As they passed the Saloon moments later, he turned again to check. ‘Well?’ he said. ‘Ya haven’t answered my question.’

 

Adam hesitated, not knowing what to say.  ‘They’re none of your business!’ he said finally.

 

Joe glared at him. ‘Why not? I got a right ta know what’s behind a window ain’t I?’

 

‘Some windows you do,’ replied his older brother. ‘But not all. Why don’t you learn to mind your own business about things?’

 

‘What are you getting so cranky about?’ Joe asked defensively. ‘I only asked!’

 

‘Well don’t,’ replied Adam testily. They continued in silence for a while. ‘Hey Adam?’ Joe asked again.

 

Adam sighed. ‘What?’ he said shortly.

 

‘I heard they’re rooms where the ladies in the saloon do their kissing.’ Adam put his head down and had a coughing fit and Joe patted him on the back. ‘Are ya OK?’ he asked, and felt relieved when his older brother nodded.

 

After a moment Adam said. ‘I wouldn’t worry about those rooms if I were you Joe.’

 

Joe looked at him. ‘Have you ever been up there and kissed one of them?’ he asked.

 

‘That’s none of your business!’ said Adam angrily. ‘Now just shut up about it will you?’

 

Joe sat deep in thought for the rest of the journey home. From Adam’s reaction he reckoned that his older brother had indeed been up to the Kissing Rooms.  Why else would he get so angry about being asked about it?  No wonder he kissed so well!  Joe had heard Alicia Sutton tell him he was a wonderful kisser at the picnic last month when Joe had been watching them from behind a tree, so he reckoned that his older brother must have had lots of practice somewhere.

 

He didn’t think it was fair that he should miss out on the experience either.  If Adam could go up there, he didn’t see why he couldn’t!  He glanced at his brother and determined to figure out a way to make it up there.

 

 

—————–

 

 

‘I’m telling you Pa, I think it’s time you had a talk with that boy!’ said Adam.

 

Ben laughed. ‘I’m sure it was just an innocent remark,’ he said. ‘He wouldn’t have meant anything by it.  Joseph wouldn’t have a clue about such things.’

 

‘Well I think you should straighten him out about the kissing at any rate,’ said Adam.

 

‘Adam I had that talk some time ago with him, just the same way I did with you and Hoss,’ said Ben. ‘I can assure you that Joe knows all about the birds and the bees.’

 

I’m not saying he doesn’t,’ said Adam. ‘But knowing it and relating it to real life are two different things you know.’

 

Ben raised his eyebrow at his oldest son. ‘Yes I do know,’ he said slowly while staring at him.

 

Adam looked away. ‘Well, I’m just trying to help,’ he said. ‘I thought you should know what he was asking.’

 

‘And I thank you for letting me know,’ said his father, quite amused. ‘But let me handle it my way.’

 

Adam shrugged and left the room. If his father wasn’t prepared to tackle the issue, then he certainly wasn’t going to do it for him! That younger brother of his gave him enough trouble without him mixed up in a discussion of that nature.

 

 

——————

 

 

‘Hey Hoss?’ asked Joe as they sat side by side in the barn. Their chores were all done and they were resting for a few moments before heading in for supper.

 

‘Yeah?’ said his older brother.

 

‘You know them rooms above the Bucket of Blood Saloon….well I found out what they’re for!’

 

Hoss jerked and looked at his brother incredulously. ‘You what?’ he said. ‘And just how did you manage that?’

 

Joe shot a look at him, wondering if he had said the wrong thing. ‘I heard someone talking about them,’ he said evasively. ‘What are they like Hoss?  Have you ever been up there?’

 

Hoss blushed a deep shade of crimson. ‘No I ain’t!’ he said in an embarrassed tone. ‘And it’s not proper ta be asking about what happens up there either.’

 

Joe frowned. ‘I don’t see why not!’ he said. ‘There’s no harm in it.  The Lupis boys do it all the time.’

 

Hoss looked at him. ‘Ya’re funning me Joe!’ he said. “I can’t believe that!’

 

‘It’s true!  They’re good at it too, and they aim ta get more practice.’  He thought about how they had described the kiss they had exchanged with Margaret Simpson. They had been very descriptive in their retelling of it. ‘How old were you when you done it for the first time Hoss?’  Joe wondered if Hoss had ever kissed a girl at all, and he aimed to find out.

 

Hoss stood up. ‘Don’t ya talk like that Joe’ he said. ‘It ain’t decent!’

 

Joe looked up at him puzzled. ‘I don’t see why not, after all Adam does it all the time.’

 

Hoss stared at him for a full minute before he found his voice. ‘How the he…. I mean how would you know?’ he finally said.

 

‘Cause I’ve seen him of course,’ replied Joe. ‘Haven’t you?’

 

‘Course I ain’t! Where’d ya get an idea like that?’

 

Joe shrugged his shoulders. ‘I dunno.  I just guessed ya had.  I’ve seen him lots of times.  At the picnic last month with Alicia Sutton for one.’

 

‘Never!’

 

Joe grinned at his brother. ‘Yeah!  I was hiding behind a tree and they didn’t know I was there. She said he was real good at it too, so I reckon he’s had lots of practice. Don’t tell him will ya though Hoss? I think he’d belt me one if he knew I was looking.’

 

Hoss’ mouth dropped open. ‘I’m sure of it!’ he replied.  He bent down and put his hand on his younger brother’s shoulder. ‘Listen ta me Joe,’ he said. ‘Ya can’t go around doing things like that.  Ya shouldn’t even talk about it.  It ain’t proper.’

 

‘No?’ Joe thought for a moment. ‘OK if you say so, although if it ain’t proper then why does everyone do it? I’ve seen lots of people.’

 

Ya haven’t!’

 

‘Yeah I have!  There was Mr and Mrs Adderson at the stage depot when he came back from San Francisco, there was Matt Becker and that girl he’s gonna marry, there’s Adam of course, and ….. why I even saw Pa do it once!’

 

Hoss hit his brother on the side of the head. ‘Now you stop yer lying!’ he said angrily. ‘That ain’t funny Joe!’

 

Joe rubbed his head. ‘I ain’t lying!  You saw it too!’ Hoss just stared at him. ‘You remember Hoss!  When Mr Harrison died, Pa did it with Mrs Harrison when we was leaving the graveyard.  He was tryin ta comfort her.’

 

Hoss sat down and put his hands over his face. Joe looked at him puzzled for a moment and then put his hand on his brother’s shoulder. ‘Are ya all right Hoss?’ he asked anxiously. ‘Did Pa do wrong, is that why you’re upset? Don’t worry, he only kissed her on the cheek.’

 

Hoss looked up at him. ‘He what? Joe what the he…. what are ya talking about boy?’

 

Joe sighed impatiently. ‘I’m talking about people kissing,’ he said impatiently. ‘Haven’t ya been listening ta me Hoss?’

 

Hoss rubbed his hand over his eyes and took a deep breath. ‘Oh,’ he said faintly.

 

Joe looked at him puzzled. ‘What’s up with you anyways?’ he said. ‘I don’t see what the big deal is about kissing.’

 

‘Listen Joe,’ said Hoss, putting his arm around his younger brother’s shoulder. ‘If I were you I wouldn’t go around worrying about kissing yet.  There’s plenty of time for ya ta get ta that. Now come inta supper or Pa’ll have our hides.’

 

Joe leapt off his perch on the upturned barrel and turned to push his brother. ‘You have your worries and I’ll have mine,’ he said evasively and grinned at him.

 

Hoss leant out to swipe him one again, but Joe sidestepped him and took a few steps backwards. ‘Too quick fer ya big brother!’ he said cheekily and stuck out his tongue. Come on, I’ll race you to supper!’

 

 

———————

 

 

‘Well you certainly seem to have your appetite back Joseph,’ said Ben in a pleased voice. ‘You must be feeling better now.’

 

‘Mmm,’ said Joe with his mouth full. ‘Some.’  He actually felt quite hungry tonight which wasn’t surprising, as he had hardly eaten during the past few days.

 

Ben nodded his approval before turning to Adam. ‘Son I was wondering if you could manage organising to move the rest of the herd this week to the South pasture.  Now that this young man is feeling better I really should get to Reno to sign those contracts.’

 

‘Of course I can Pa. Hoss can finish the rest of the fences,’ replied Adam. ‘When will you go?’

 

‘On tomorrow’s stage,’ said Ben. ‘I’ll stay overnight and be back on Thursday.’

 

Joe looked at his father eagerly, an idea forming in his mind. If Pa were away, then Adam would be in charge and maybe it might be the very time to make his move?  He chewed thoughtfully as he put the pieces of his plan together. Wednesday night would likely be a quiet night at the Saloon – he had heard someone say once that Fridays and Saturdays were the busy nights.  The girls would have more time for kissing him on a quiet night.  Besides, Adam or Hoss might come and check up on him before they went to bed, but they would never check closely like Pa would.  He’d be able to sneak out and spend a couple of hours in town without anyone knowing a thing about it.

 

His grin got wider as he thought about the education he was about to get, and he failed to see Adam’s look from across the table as he sat there lost in his dreams. Now what’s he so happy about? thought Adam suspiciously.  I hope it’s got nothing to do with Pa going away overnight. He made a mental note to watch his younger brother carefully during the next couple of days.

 

 

——————-

 

 

‘Ya mean it Joe?’ asked Mitch admiringly. ‘Ya can’t be serious!’

 

Joe gave his friend a superior look. ‘Of course I mean it!’ he said. ‘It’s my only chance ta get out of the house. It’d be real tricky with Pa around.  Besides,’ he added proudly. ‘I reckon them ladies is wondering why I haven’t come back yet.  They was real keen ta get started kissing me.’

 

Mitch sighed. ‘Wish I could come with ya!’ he said mournfully. ‘But there’s no way I’d get out of my house without someone noticing.’

 

Joe patted him on the arm. ‘Don’t worry Mitch,’ he said. ‘I’ll tell ya all about it, and give ya some hints ya can try on someone if ya want ta practise too.’  He looked across the playground. ‘We could try Margaret Simpson, after all she did it with the Lupis boys.’

 

‘Well when you find out the finer details we’ll give it a go,’ said Mitch eagerly. ‘Reckon she’ll be in it?’

 

Joe shrugged. ‘Don’t know,’ he said. ‘But we can try. Besides,’ he added with a great deal of confidence. ‘We’re better looking than the Lupis boys any day.’

 

 

—————–

 

 

Joe was careful not to cause any problems after school that afternoon and did his chores without being asked.  He wanted no complications with either of his brothers to spoil what he felt would be a night to remember and decided to play it safe.  After eating his supper without a fuss he suggested an early night for himself and was worried to see a strange look in Adam’s eye.

 

‘Why?’ his older brother asked with a raised eyebrow.

 

‘No reason,’ Joe said casually. ‘Reckon I’m still a bit tired from all that sickness I had last week that’s all. Goodnight.’  He headed up the stairs without another word.

 

‘Don’t you find that rather strange?’ Adam asked Hoss. ‘He’s sure got me wondering what he’s up to lately.’

 

Hoss looked up from the catalogue he was reading. ‘Huh?  Aw, leave him alone Adam.  You’re always making out that the kid’s up to something.’

 

‘That’s because I know him well,’ replied Adam. ‘Come on Hoss, you know what he’s like.  Haven’t you noticed him acting strangely lately?’

 

Hoss stroked his chin. ‘Actually now that ya come ta mention it, he was asking me strange things yesterday.’

 

Adam sat forward . ‘Yeah?’ he asked. ‘What about?’

 

Hoss blushed slightly. ‘Well…. just about, kissing and stuff.’

 

Adam raised his eyebrows even further. ‘No kidding?  Me too!’

 

Hoss looked at him stunned. ‘What?  I didn’t think he’d ask you after seeing you……’

 

‘Seeing me what?’’ asked Adam suspiciously.

 

‘Nothing,’ replied Hoss, and then shook his head slightly as he felt his older brother staring at him. ‘Well he kinda saw ya kissing some girl and he….’

 

Adam snorted. ‘I might have known!’ he said. ‘That kid’s always hanging around where he shouldn’t be. He’s going to get a piece of my mind!’  He stood up.

 

‘Hoss looked at him distressed. ‘Aw come on Adam,’ he said. ‘He’ll think I’ve been tattling on him.  Don’t do that!’

 

‘I won’t say it was you who told me.’ replied his brother. ‘But considering he was asking me about the rooms…..’

 

‘Rooms?’ interrupted Hoss. ‘You mean the rooms upstairs from the Bucket of Blood? He asked me about them too. Don’t worry.  He thinks they’re just for kissing.’

 

‘I know, but he needs to be told to shut up about it,’ said Adam. ‘Otherwise Pa’ll have his hide. You know he wouldn’t appreciate talk like that.’

 

Hoss nodded. They both knew that Ben would never approve of their younger brother even knowing about the rooms, let alone what they were used for.

 

‘I’ll just have a talk to him,’ said Adam. ‘Tell him to shut up about it around Pa.’

 

‘Ya ain’t gonna talk about ….. well, you know, what they really are?’ asked Hoss anxiously.

 

‘Don’t be stupid,’ replied Adam. ‘I’m not his father.  Pa keeps telling me that and this is one time I’m willing to remember it.  If he wants to know any more he can find out from Pa in the right way.’

 

Hoss nodded, quite relieved to hear it.  A moment later he heard a yell coming from upstairs and he didn’t feel so relieved after all. He looked up anxiously as Adam appeared at the top of the stairs. ‘What?’ he said as he saw the angry look on his face.

 

‘I’m going to kill that kid when I find him!’ yelled his brother. ‘He’s not in his room!’

 

‘Where would he be?’ asked Hoss with a puzzled look on his face.

 

‘One guess,’ replied Adam sarcastically as he reached for his coat. ‘Where do you think he might be headed after the questions he’s been asking all week?’

 

‘The Kissing Rooms!’ said Hoss, shaking his head.

 

‘Yes, the Kissing Rooms,’ said Adam angrily. ‘I’m going to haul his butt out of there so quickly that he won’t know what’s hit him!  I’m going to pound his face into the dirt!  I’m going to……’

 

‘Do you want me to come and help?’ asked Hoss getting up.

 

‘No, you stay here in case he makes it home before I can get to him,’ said Adam. He stopped for a moment with his hand on the doorknob. ‘That crazy kid!  He’s going to wish he had never been born when I get through with him!’  Hoss flinched as the front door slammed behind his brother.

 

 

——————–

 

 

Joe fingered the money in his pocket and grinned.  He had brought all he had this time, as he wasn’t quite sure if the ladies would like a drink before they got to the kissing and he didn’t want to be embarrassed like the last time.  As he approached the Bucket of Blood he was a bit taken aback to see that the place had quite a few people in it, many more than the last time.  But then again, he reasoned that had been Sunday morning so it was to be expected. Even though this wasn’t classed as a busy night a few people around might be to his advantage, as he could get a bit lost in the crowd.

 

He walked in slowly, pulling his black hat down over his eyes and glancing furtively around in case there was anyone he might recognise.  A quick glance assured him that it wasn’t the case, which he had been counting on.  Most of his family’s acquaintances wouldn’t be in town mid-week anyway, and if they were they’d be at the Silver Dollar, he was sure.

 

Quickly he scampered into the back room, and found it quite empty this time.  Only one lady sat there in the corner, quietly drinking from a small glass.  With relief, he noticed that it was the red-haired lady who had been so nice to him the other day. ‘Hello,’ he said with his most charming grin as he walked up to her. ‘I’m back!’

 

She looked up at him. ‘Huh?’ she said.

 

He tried again. ‘I’m back,’ he repeated. ‘Remember me? Joe.’

 

She shook her head. ‘Nope, sorry kid.’

 

Joe frowned. ‘I was in here on Sunday morning.  You said I could come back for an education. You said you’d teach me.’

 

She laughed. ‘Oh yeah!  I remember.  You’re that cute kid ain’t ya Joe?  The one who was going to buy all us ladies a drink.’

 

He grinned at her again and sat down. ‘Yep, that’s me!’ he said with more confidence. ‘I will before we start if ya like.’

 

She reached over and stroked his neck. ‘Thanks, but I’ve already got one.  And I don’t have time for any lessons now kid, even for a cutie like you.  I’m working.’

 

He looked around at the empty room. ‘Working at what?’ he said. ‘There’s no one here.’

 

She smiled. ‘Well you’re right there!’ she said. ‘Tell you what Joe. How about you show me how much money you’ve got and we’ll see if we can come to some arrangement.’

 

Joe eagerly emptied his pocket and put the change on the table. ‘Is that enough?’ he asked.

 

She bent forward and looked at it, then sighed. ‘Guess it’ll have to do,’ she said. ‘Are you sure about this?  You are kinda young.’

 

He drew himself up to his full height. ‘I’m old enough,’ he said. ‘I just want you ta show me what ta do, and then I’m gonna practise till I get better.’

 

She choked as she took another swallow of her drink. ‘Well I’ll say one thing, you’re a forward kid!’

 

Joe’s grin got bigger. ‘Thanks,’ he said.  ‘Say what’s ya name anyways?’

 

‘Betsy,’ she said, standing up and picking up his money. ‘Come on, let’s get started.’

 

Joe stood up eagerly and followed her up a flight of steps.  His heart was pounding as he realised that he was so close to the kissing part, and he licked his lips with excitement.  As Betsy ushered him into one of the rooms he looked around with great anticipation and was surprised to see that it was a room like any other.  There didn’t seem to be anything special about it at all, for it was sparsely furnished with a bed and a small table and nothing else.  He looked around and then turned to Betsy. ‘Can we start now?’ he asked.

 

She laughed at him. ‘Simmer down there Joe, let’s get organised first shall we?’ She sat on the bed and patted the spot next to her as she smiled at him.

 

He hesitated. ‘Um…. I don’t know if I should sit down there,’ he said, a little uncomfortable. ‘Can’t we just stand up?’

 

She stared at him. ‘No honey, I think it’s better if we sit down to start.’

 

He reluctantly sat next to her.  She reached over and put her face close to his as she whispered. ‘It’s OK Joe, I’ll be real gentle with you.’

 

He smiled at her a little hesitantly.  Now that he was up here he was feeling a little strange, but tried not to show it. His stomach felt like it was fluttering and he swallowed to try and calm it down.

 

She reached over and put her hand behind his neck and gave it a slight rub. ‘Now honey, she said. ‘Just relax for Betsy will you?  We’ll get on much better if you do.’ He nodded silently as he stared at her. She bent closer and touched her lips lightly against his, barely brushing them in passing.  A thrill ran through his body and he closed his eyes as he leant closer to her. Gently she pushed her lips down on his and he felt a rush of exhilaration course through his body as he returned the pressure. ‘Steady Joe,’ she laughed as she moved back from him. ‘Like this.’  She tried again, and he felt her mouth forcing his open.  He parted his lips eagerly and put his arms around her shoulders, bending forward to get even closer to her mouth.

 

For a few moments they stayed in that position, both enjoying the contact.  After a few moments Betsy moved back from him and looked at him with wide eyes. ‘Well I think you might be a natural at this Joe,’ she said. ‘Just a natural for a boy your age.’

 

Joe puffed up with pride, glad that she considered him good at it. ‘That was real nice Betsy,’ he said. ‘Can we do it again?’

 

Of course we can,’ she said gleefully. ‘Let’s try another, shall we?’

 

For the next few moments they both revelled in Joe’s newfound skill, Betsy enjoying the freshness of his approach and Joe enjoying the freshness of the whole experience.  As he moved his lips and head eagerly, thoughts of what he would say to Mitch ran through his mind and he tried to focus on exactly what she was doing and how it felt so that he could describe it in detail later.

 

Suddenly he felt her mouth move away from his and he moved slightly to claim it back again. ‘Steady Joe,’ she whispered. ‘Just go with it honey.’

 

He hesitated as he felt her lips trace a trail down his chin and neck, and end up making little fluttery movements on the top of his chest.  This was incredible!  He had never known that anyone would kiss anywhere but on the other person’s face, and he wondered why he hadn’t thought of this before.  Eagerly he returned the favour and nuzzled her neck with his mouth.  She giggled. ‘That’s it Joe. Now you’re getting the idea.’

 

He was having so much fun that he didn’t realise what she was doing until it was too late and his hand was being held on her bosom.  He drew back quickly and looked at her in surprise. ‘What’cha doing?’ he asked a little anxiously.

 

She took hold of his hand again. ‘I told you Joe, just relax.’  She tried to put it back to where it had rested before, but he drew back again. She massaged his neck and said gently. ‘All right then honey, I’ll give you a bit of help will I?’

 

To Joe’s shock and consternation she reached behind her back and fumbled for a moment with her dress.  His gaze was riveted to her heaving bosom and it wasn’t until it was too late that he realised just what she was doing. Her dress suddenly dropped to her waist and he saw the real version of what he had just a few days ago been so eager to see in the picture.  He looked at her in utter embarrassment and his mouth dropped open.

 

‘Come on honey, you can touch them now,’ she said invitingly as she leant forward and her bosom flopped towards him.

 

Joe swallowed and said miserably. ‘I…. I… I um don’t think I….’

 

She leant forward and clutched his hands and planted them firmly.  ‘There,’ she said. ‘That’s not so difficult is it?’

 

He reluctantly moved his hands slightly and was surprised to feel her bosoms were quite squishy.  Embarrassed, he leant back until he was pressing against the bed head. ‘I ….um… they’re very nice,’ he said, looking away.

 

Betsy leant forward until she was almost lying on top of him. ‘Try again,’ she invited.

 

Joe looked up at the two orbs dangling in front of his nose and closed his eyes.  He suddenly felt very hot and realised that it might be time to get home before it got too late. ‘I… um… thanks,’ he said. ‘But I kinda gotta go now,’ he stammered.

 

Betsy pressed down on him. ‘Go?’ she said. ‘Why Joe honey, we’re just getting started.  Just you look at what Betsy has in store for you next.’

 

Joe gulped as she reached down and began to undo his shirt buttons.  He pushed her hands away and tried to get out from under her, but she grabbed his hands and held onto them. ‘Come on now honey,’ she said. ‘This is what you came up here for isn’t it?’

 

He shook his head. ‘Huh? I thought you was gonna teach me about kissing,’ he said, desperately now.

 

‘I am,’ she whispered. ‘And lots more besides.’

 

Joe wasn’t sure what the lots more besides was going to be, but he already felt that the dangling bosoms were more than he could handle right about now.  With one big push he rolled her off him and scrambled to his feet.  ‘Thanks Betsy,’ he gulped. ‘I had a real nice time looking at your bosoms and all, but I do kinda have ta go home now.’

 

She looked up at him sadly. ‘What a shame,’ she said.

 

 

—————–

 

 

Adam strode through the doors of the Bucket of Blood and glared around. ‘Will,’ he said to the bartender. ‘Have you seen a youngster in here tonight?  Thin, with curly brown hair and green eyes?’

 

‘Yeah,’ said the man. ‘The same kid that was in here on Sunday morning.  He went into the back room.’

 

Adam glared at him. ‘Did you say Sunday morning?’ he said angrily.

 

‘Yep.  Made a real hit with all the gals in there too.  They thought he was kinda cute, I think.’

 

Adam frowned even more. ‘He’s not going to be so cute when I get my hands on him,’ he muttered. ‘Where is he now?’

 

‘He went upstairs with Betsy,’ said Will. ‘It’s room number….’

 

Adam waved him aside. ‘I know my way,’ he said. He leapt up the stairs three at a time, his head thumping with the blood that was coursing through it.  He stopped at the third room down the hall and hesitated only for a moment before he flung the door wide open. He stood open-mouthed at the sight of his little brother standing in the middle of the room, with his gaze transfixed to the ample bare breasts of the red-haired woman lying on the bed in front of him.

 

With two strides he had covered the distance between them and grabbed hold of his brother’s collar.  With the full weight that he had at his disposal he pulled the boy backwards and towards the door. Joe turned his head as he felt himself flung backwards and nearly lost his footing.  ‘You!’ Adam yelled in his face. ‘Get out now!’

 

Joe hesitated, too stunned to move. One moment he was staring at Betsy’s squishy bosoms and then next he was staring at Adam’s face. He opened his mouth, but then shut it again as he realised there was nothing he could think of to say. He took a step backwards, trying to create a distance between himself and his irate brother, but was unsuccessful as Adam had a tight grip on his arm.  ‘Move!’ yelled Adam again, pushing him towards the door.

 

Betsy stood up and began to cover herself. ‘Adam,’ she said happily. ‘How lovely to see you.’

 

Joe turned to stare at his brother. They knew each other?  He might have known it!  Adam had been practising kissing up here all right, and probably looking at bosoms as well, just like he had.  With this new-found knowledge he became a little braver in the face of the danger.

 

‘Do ya know Betsy?’ he said to his brother.

 

 

Adam turned and slapped him on the side of his head. ‘Shut up,’ he said and then turned to Betsy again. ‘You just leave my little brother alone in the future if you know what’s good for you,’ he snarled.

 

The woman jerked. ‘Your…. what?’  She stared at them both. ‘Well I’ll be!  I thought he reminded me of someone.’  She smiled at Joe. ‘Now I know why you were such a quick learner honey.  It must …..’

 

‘That’s enough!’ said Adam, really furious now. He turned away from her and pushed his younger brother down the stairs and out of the front door of the saloon.  Without a word he propelled him along the street to where their horses were tied and pushed the boy up against his mount. He leant close to him and waved his finger directly under his nose as he said in a quiet voice. ‘Now you listen to me real well Joe. You get on that horse and then we are riding back to the ranch.  You are not to utter one word…. Is that clear?  Not a single word until we get there.  I will deal with you at home, and if you want any part of you to remain for Pa to find when he returns tomorrow you’ll do exactly as I say. Understood?’

 

Joe swallowed and nodded.  He had never heard his brother address him using quite this tone, and he thought for once it might be sensible just to hold his tongue.  He got onto his horse without a word and throughout the long journey home was as silent as he could be. He stole a couple of glances at Adam as they rode silently side-by-side and he didn’t like what he saw.  His brother was stony-faced with his jaw clamped shut and he was staring straight ahead.  Joe felt the anger that hung between them and hated to think of what his brother may have meant when he said that he would deal with him. He figured it wouldn’t be at all pleasant and wished that he could just have it over with.

 

Adam for his part was trying to maintain his control.  His first impulse was to knock his little brother’s head off, but with great restraint he managed to hold himself together long enough to allow for some breathing space.  In all honesty he was a little afraid of what he might do to the boy if he allowed himself to start, and needed the ride home to gather his emotions and work out just what to say.

 

By the time they reached the barn, he still didn’t know.  He signalled for Joe to take the horses inside, and Joe did so without hesitation.  He stabled both mounts, watching his brother pacing outside while he worked.  When he had finished he squared his shoulders back and tried to give the impression that all was well as he walked outside. ‘Well, I guess I’ll get upstairs now to my room,’ he said, trying to appear nonchalant.

 

Adam looked at him. ‘Back in there!’ he said pointing into the barn.

 

Joe took a step back as his brother made a move towards him, and gulped. ‘Can’t we just…’ Adam pointed again and took another step forward.  Joe turned quickly and did as he was bid, standing not too far from the door in case he had to make a quick getaway.  He watched Adam pacing again for a few moments, until finally his older brother turned to face him. ‘I suppose you think you’re pretty darned clever, nearly getting away with that!’ he said angrily.

 

Joe shook his head. ‘No, I only…’

 

‘Quiet!’ his brother interrupted. ‘You shut up until I tell you to open your mouth. Understand?’  Joe nodded again and backed up against the wall.  ‘Now, one thing needs to be made very clear between us. I never want, and I mean NEVER want to hear of you going in there again.  If I do, then you will wish you had never heard of the Bucket of Blood, let alone those rooms upstairs!’

 

‘The Kissing Rooms,’ Joe said without thinking.

 

Adam stopped pacing and glared at him. ‘Did I tell you to speak?’ he shouted.  Joe shook his head again and closed his mouth. Adam continued. ‘I am going to give you such a walloping tonight that you will remember this for the rest of your life little brother.  And then I’m going to hand you over to Pa tomorrow when he gets home.’

 

Joe went pale. ‘Adam you can’t!’ he squeaked. ‘Pa will kill me!’

 

‘Yes he will,’ Adam said without feeling. ‘Which is no more than you deserve!  What the hell were you thinking?  What possessed you to go in there?’

 

‘I wanted ta learn about kissing,’ Joe replied. ‘They said they’d teach me.’

 

‘Really? When?’  Joe was silent. ‘On Sunday I suppose during your little excursion there!’

 

Joe stared at his brother.  How had he known about Sunday? ‘Um……yeah,’ he muttered.

 

‘So you visited there twice!’ Adam thundered. ‘You are in for it Joe!  You are going to wish…’

 

Joe glared back at him. ‘Well you visited there too!’ he countered. ‘Betsy knew who you were, so you musta been there practising kissing and looking at …. You musta been there too!’

 

Adam took a step towards him. ‘What I do in my life is none of your business!’ he shouted. ‘I am an adult and responsible for my own actions, whereas you are a mere child.  That much you’ve proved tonight at least!’

 

Joe smirked. ‘Betsy didn’t seem ta think so,’ he said.

 

Adam shook him. ‘Shut up!’ he said. ‘It was obvious you were in way over your head little brother, so don’t make this any worse by lying about what happened.  You went up there to kiss a girl and you saw more than you bargained for.  I’m just grateful I got there before she went too far with you.’

 

Joe looked at him, not too sure what he meant by too far. ‘I coulda handled it!’ he said confidently.

 

Adam shook him again. ‘I said to shut up!’ he said and turned to pace again, muttering to himself.  Joe stood and watched him silently, hoping that he would calm down enough to allow him to get a few words in. Finally Adam turned to him again. ‘Right!’ he said, breathing heavily. ‘It’s over with now.  But you have to realise that you can’t get away with something like this.’  He started to unbuckle his belt. ‘Get your shirt off,’ he said.

 

Joe looked at him appalled. ‘No way!’ he said. ‘You ain’t laying a hand on me!’

 

‘You get that shirt off or I’ll rip it off you personally,’ Adam retorted. ‘Now!’

 

Joe stood his ground. ‘No!’ he said. ‘You ain’t my Pa, and I ain’t taking this from you!’

 

‘You’ll take it from me and you’ll take it from Pa as well tomorrow,’ said Adam angrily. ‘Wait until he finds out what you’ve done!’

 

‘Wait until he finds out what you done too!’ said Joe.

 

‘What?’

 

‘You heard me.  If you tell Pa, then I’ll tell him how Betsy knew you up there. She seemed ta know you real well!’  Joe swallowed, feeling a lot less confident about how his brother would react to this blackmail than he sounded.

 

‘You’ll do what??’ shouted Adam. ‘How dare you threaten me!’  Joe stared at him silently, praying that his threat would work. ‘I’m not about to take this kind of garbage from you Joe!’ shouted Adam again, and turned to pace up and down once more, rubbing his nose as he walked.  Joe stood as still as he could be, trying to give his brother space to come to the right conclusion.

 

Finally Adam stopped pacing and looked at Joe again. ‘Well maybe you’re right,’ he said.  ‘Maybe this should be just between the two of us.’  Joe grinned. ‘But you’re not getting away with it that easy!’ countered Adam. ‘You’re still going to be punished by me, and I’m going to give you a lesson you’ll never forget.  Now get that shirt off!’

 

Joe shook his head. ‘No,’ he said.

 

Adam advanced upon him and grabbed him by the arm. ‘We can do this the easy way little brother, or we can do this the hard way,’ he said quietly.  ‘Your choice!’  Joe swallowed again as his hand slowly reached up to undo his top button.

 

 

——————

 

 

‘You shouldn’t let him get away with that Joe!’ said Mitch indignantly. ‘He’s got no right to belt you like that!’

 

Joe nodded miserably. ‘I know,’ he said. Trouble is, I can’t make a fuss about it to Pa and Adam knows it. Seems I don’t have much choice.’  He shifted slightly on the bench and arched his back. ‘Besides,’ he added with a slight grin. ‘He didn’t put much force into it ya know.  Guess I scared him a bit with my threat ta tell Pa.’ He grinned wider. ‘Anyway, it was worth it!’

 

‘Tell me again,’ encouraged Mitch.  ‘I want to hear it all again from the beginning.’

 

‘Well the kissing part was great,’ said Joe enthusiastically. ‘But it was the bosoms that really were exciting!’

 

‘Yeah?’ said Mitch with shining eyes. ‘And you actually touched them?’

 

Yep!’ said Joe proudly. ‘I did. They was all squishy too.’

 

‘Wow,’ said Mitch looking at him admiringly. ‘Reckon you know it all now Joe!’

 

Joe a hand on his friend’s shoulder. ‘Don’t worry Mitch, one day you’ll get the chance as well.’

 

‘I hope so,’ Mitch sighed. ‘I’d hate to think I won’t.’

 

‘Believe me it’s worth it,’ continued Joe. ‘When you’ve done it you’ll understand what it’s like to be a man.  Reckon I am one now for sure, no one could argue that I wasn’t.’

 

‘For sure!’ agreed Mitch. ‘Hey Joe?’

 

‘Mmm?’

 

‘What do you reckon would have happened if Adam hadn’t interrupted you?’  Joe had not quite told the entire truth at this point in the story and preferred to let his friend think that his brother had interrupted him as he was about to find out more.

 

‘Mitch I don’t think you need to know that,’ he said, not sure himself.  ‘It’s best if you take things one step at a time.  I wouldn’t like to give you too much information all at once and have ya worry about handling it.’  Mitch frowned at him. ‘Don’t worry though,’ continued Joe. ‘When you’re up ta the bosoms bit I’ll talk to ya about the next bit then.’  He figured by then he might have it worked out.

 

‘Thanks Joe,’ said Mitch. ‘You’re a great friend.’ Joe smiled at him. ‘But you ain’t going back there are you? That’s an awful risk to take now that Adam knows.’

 

I can handle Adam,’ said Joe.  ‘Besides I don’t mean right away.  But I’ll back there eventually.  After all, they were real keen on me, and I reckon there’s a few other ladies there that’d like ta show me their bosoms too. Once ya’ve seen one lot ya kinda get a hankering to see more.’

 

I reckon you’re right,’ agreed his friend.

 

 

—————–

 

 

 

Ben stepped down from the stage and looked around, and his eyes lit up as he saw Adam standing by the stage office waiting for him. ‘Hello son,’ he said, giving him a quick pat on the shoulder.  Adam never liked displays of affection in public, and Ben was always very aware of that.  Not so his youngest son, however, who bounded over to him and clasped him around the neck briefly. ‘Hello,’ he said laughing. ‘What are you doing here Joseph?’

 

‘Joe has been sticking pretty close to me while you’ve been away,’ said Adam casually.  I told him to meet me here after school and we could all go home together.’

 

‘Oh?’ said Ben. ‘Any particular reason?’

 

Adam looked at his brother, who gave his father a big grin. ‘Just cause I’m pleased ta see ya Pa!’ Joe said. ‘How’d ya go in Reno?’

 

‘Fine, fine,’ said Ben as he reached up for his bag. The three of them wandered down the street as he began to tell them about his business deal.  As they crossed over to the buggy that Adam had hitched on the other side of the street, they passed a woman dressed in red who smiled at them all.  ‘Hello Joe,’ she said as she passed them and gave him a pat on the arm as she winked at him. ‘How are you today?’

 

Joe looked at the ground and mumbled, ‘Fine thanks,’ before scampering over to his horse.

 

Ben stood stock still watching the woman’s retreating back with a look of utter shock on his face. He turned towards Adam who noticed that his father’s face had gone a bright shade of red.  ‘What on earth?’ he said incredulously.

Adam shrugged, knowing that there was no way to avoid telling his father the story now. When a woman like Betsy greeted someone in the street there was only one place she could have met them.

 

Ben took two strides over to where his youngest son was cowering near his horse. ‘What was that all about?’ he said in a low voice.

 

Joe moved around to the other side of the horse. ‘Gee I dunno Pa,’ he said quietly.

 

Ben moved around the other side of the horse as well and grabbed him by the arm. ‘You know her?’

 

Joe gulped and looked at Adam beseechingly, but his older brother just stared back at him. ‘I… um….’  he stammered.

 

‘She knows you,’ said his father in the same low voice.  ‘I’d like to know how.’

 

Joe breathed heavily and fiddled with the strap on his saddle as he tried to think up a logical reason for a woman from the Bucket of Blood Saloon greeting him in the street. ‘Well…Pa… I…..’

 

Ben stared at him. ‘I’m waiting Joseph,’ he said and leant forward to whisper. ‘Don’t even think about lying your way out of this one if you value your life boy.’

 

Joe knew he had no choice but to come clean. ‘I met her,’ he said quietly, hoping he wouldn’t have to elaborate. Ben continued to stare at him. ‘In the …. the Saloon,’ he said finally.

 

‘You went into the Saloon?  Did your brothers give you permission?’ asked Ben.

 

Joe looked at Adam again, but he said nothing. ‘Um…. no they didn’t,’ he said finally.

 

‘And so you just decided you would go in there for a drink did you?’ said Ben.

 

Joe considered owning up to this the lesser of two evils. ‘Um… yeah I did,’ he said taking a step back.

 

Ben reached out and grabbed him by the shoulders, then closed his eyes for a moment. ‘Joseph!’ he yelled at the boy. ‘Get on that horse and ride for home NOW! You and I are going to have a discussion when I get there, and I’m warning you it won’t be a little one!

 

Joe couldn’t get onto his horse quickly enough.  As he raced down the street, Ben turned to Adam. ‘You knew about this?’ he asked.

 

Adam his hands up in a gesture of resignation.  There was no hope for it now.  ‘I found out last night,’ he said. ‘I think you’d better ask Joe all about it.’

 

‘Don’t you worry I intend to do more than just talk to that young man when I get him alone,’ said his father angrily as he turned to mount his horse. Adam mounted alongside him and they began to ride at a more sedate pace than Joe had done moments before.

 

After a few moments, Ben turned to Adam again. ‘You said the other day he was asking about those rooms.  You don’t think….’ He stopped and shook his head. ‘No, that’s just plain ridiculous. A boy his age wouldn’t get near a woman like Betsy.’

 

Adam sighed. ‘Pa I think there’s a lot I need to tell you about last night,’ he said. ‘Joe got in sort of over his head. Don’t worry, nothing happened, but I did have to go in there and get him out.’

 

Ben stared at him with his mouth open. ‘You don’t mean to tell me that the boy actually went….’

 

Adam nodded. ‘I’m afraid so,’ he said. ‘Come on I’ll tell you about it as we ride.’

 

As they rounded the corner of the street and headed for the trail that led to The Ponderosa, Adam faltered for a moment as a thought struck him and he stared incredulously at his father riding in front of him. He had suddenly realised that neither he nor Joe had mentioned the woman’s name, and yet Ben had called her Betsy!  He stopped dead in his tracks staring at the man until Ben turned to face him. ‘Adam?’ he said. ‘What is it?’

 

Adam swallowed . ‘Um…. Nothing Pa,’ he said. ‘We need to talk about Little Joe that’s all.’  He caught up with his father and began to relate the sorry tale.

 

The End