Summary:  Even as Adam and Shiloh celebrate the birth of their first child, a son, trouble is eminent with Hoss still partially blind, Micah fighting for his life and more work than one man or woman can handle.  This is a story about setting limits while raising Cartwrights.

Rating: PG-13  (152, 970 words)  Reader Alert: Some violence, mild adult situations

To Everything, There is a Season Series:

Reacquaintance
Falling
Togetherness
Growing Pains
Family Ties
Life’s Demands

 

                                                  Life’s Demands

 

Chapter One

The last of the winter storms was past them and spring work had begun.  Four weeks had passed since Adam brought Micah home.  It had been only a few days before then that Abel, Adam and Shiloh’s firstborn, arrived.

 

Micah was still confined to bed at the Ponderosa after a man from his past had branded his feet and left him for dead in the high desert.  He was learning to make do with less laudanum, and had begun to eat because he was hungry rather than because he was told.

 

Hop Sing had managed to keep infection from the severe burns at bay with a cream he and Cheron had concocted.  Still, Dr. Martin wondered if Micah would ever walk again on soles with little skin left.

 

Shiloh had managed to walk albeit a few steps at first, but taking a few steps more each day.  But by the end of the day, her exhaustion in fighting the pain was plain on her face.  Paul was sure that if Abel’s difficult birth had caused a fracture, it was well on its way to healing, but he was also sure that muscle and connective tissue injuries could easily take longer than small fractures.  He encouraged her to walk every day, assuring her that using her muscles would only strengthen them.

 

Evenings were her favorite time of day because Adam was home.  He never came in before dark, doing as much as possible around the ranches as long as light permitted.  Yet even though he was at home, many nights he may as well have been absent.  He washed, ate dinner and then retreated to his study occupied at his new desk and drawing table that had arrived only the week before.

 

He was there, Shiloh lamented, though absent.  She spent her evenings in the office with him, if only to be close.  By that time, she was tired and would retreat to the wheelchair.  Little Abel lay quietly in his cradle next to her as she read in between loving but melancholy glances at Adam’s back.

 

Tonight, she had read the same page several times before she gave up and closed the book.  Looking down beside her, she checked on Abel, and then pushed herself up out of the chair.  She remained in place until she felt steady.  In all that movement, Adam never lifted his head from his drawings.

 

He had hung those that were finished on the wall in front of him to reference while he completed another elevation of the Hotaling Building which had changed from a hotel to offices and a warehouse for the Hotaling’s whiskey business.

 

Taking a deep breath, a smile moved across his lips when her hands touched his shoulders, moving slowly down his back, around his sides and across his chest as she pressed into him.  At first, he continued to draw, but stopped, slowly laying his pencil down when he felt her head settle on his back.  He found her hand, lifting it to his lips.  “Why don’t I take you upstairs?”

 

“I’m not going without you.”

 

He chuckled. “Well, that’s true considering I have to carry you up the stairs.”

 

“If you take me upstairs, I’m not going to let you come back down.”

 

Tightening his lips into a line, he said, “I need to finish these drawings tonight and get them out on the morning stage to San Francisco.”

 

Lifting her head, she placed her chin on his shoulder and spoke in his ear.  “You get up before dawn and you don’t stop until after midnight.  You can’t keep this up.”

 

“Spring is always busy.  You know that.”

 

“I also know that this spring is unusually busy for you because Hoss and Micah can’t help.”

 

He turned around and pulled her into him.  “We had this conversation last night.”

 

Wrapping her arms around his neck, she continued, “And we had this conversation the night before and the night before that.  Adam, you need more help.  All this work is wearing you, and Joe and Pa out.”

 

He lifted her into his arms and stood, carrying her out of the office toward the stairs.  “Sweetheart, we’re used to long hours in the spring.  This isn’t unusual.”

 

“It is.  Before Slater, you came home, relaxed and went to bed.  Now you come home, bathe, eat and go back to work.   And aren’t you forgetting someone?”

 

Adam tucked his tongue in his cheek and turned around, heading back for the office. Once there, he set Shiloh on her feet, lifted Abel out of his cradle and placed him in his mother’s arms, then lifted her again and resumed his journey up the stairs to their bedroom where he went directly to the bed and lay her down.

 

She frowned. “Adam, I’m dressed.  I can’t go to bed without changing into my gown.”

 

“Stay right there while I put Abel to bed,” he said, yawning.  “I’ll help you back up.”

 

Shiloh waited until Adam entered the nursery next to their bedroom, then slowly moved to the side of the bed and sat up.  Their new furniture had finally been delivered, and now in their own bedroom with a new, somewhat higher, firmer bed, it was easier for her to move in it.   She took several deep breaths and stood, wavering for a moment.  She’d left her cane in the study.

 

“Adam,” she called loud enough for him to hear her in the nursery, “I need to feed him before I lay down.  Bring him back, please.”

 

Adam turned back toward the bedroom and leaned against the door frame with one ankle crossed over the other and his hands tucked into his armpits.   He twisted his mouth into a sideways pucker as he watched her hobble to the chest of drawers and take out her night gown.  She unbuttoned her blouse with one hand as she steadied herself against the chest with the other, and when she let her hand drop to her side and visibly sagged, he hurried to her, grasping her upper arms.

 

“Sweetheart, let me help.”

 

Taking a deep breath, she smiled, though he couldn’t see it.  “I have to get used to doing things for myself, Adam.  I’m just tired.”  She side-stepped him and slowly shuffled back to the bed where she sat and finished undressing.  By the time she pulled her gown over her head, Adam was standing by with Abel, ready to pass the baby to her.

 

He stayed while she settled Abel down for his meal, and once Abel seemed content in her arms, he moved toward the door.

 

“Please don’t go.”

 

He stopped and waited for a moment before he turned to her.  “I have to finish tonight.”

 

“What harm would there be if you sent the drawings on the noon stage?  You don’t really think Robert’s going to rush right over to deliver them do you?  No, he’ll take some time to go over them before he does that.”

 

Adam scratched his neck.  “It’s not just the Hotaling Building.  I have other work to do.”

 

When she looked up at him, the dark circles around her eyes seemed more pronounced in the low light of the lamp on the night table.  Her eyes were dull, her lips taut and pale…she looked so tired.

 

“I miss you,” she whispered before she lowered her gaze to her son as she gently stroked the fine hair on his head while the child obliviously took his nourishment.  Without looking back up, she continued, “I want you to start sleeping in this bed.”

 

Taking several steps toward her, he shook his head, trying to find words that wouldn’t disappoint her too badly.  “Shiloh, I don’t want to cause you any more pain than you’re already in.”

 

She snorted.  “I don’t know what’s worse.  The pain in my hips or the pain in my heart.”  She turned her pleading eyes to up to his.  “This is a bigger bed.  It doesn’t sink like your old bed.  I just want to be able to reach out and feel you beside me.   That’s all.”

 

He dropped his forehead into his hand and stroked his temples.  “All right.  I’ll be back after I finish up the drawing I was working on.”  She opened her mouth to protest, but he raised a finger along with his eyebrows.  “I just need to check it and take down the drawings on the wall.  I won’t be long.”

 

She lowered her eyes and said nothing more.

 

By the time Adam returned, Shiloh was asleep with Abel at her side.  He collected the baby and moved him to the baby bed he’d added to the furniture order soon after they moved into the house, then stripped, leaving his clothes in a heap on the floor, and for the first time since Abel’s birth, he slipped under the covers of the new bed next to his wife.

 

Chapter Two

 

It was unusual that Shiloh was able to watch Adam as he slept.   He usually woke before her.  It wasn’t that she woke any earlier than she normally did.   Adam was slowly wearing himself down, and if she hadn’t been quite sure of it before, she certainly was now.   He was up in the mornings like clockwork…except for this morning.

 

She had already been up twice with Abel, and each time she had come back to bed, Adam seemed peaceful enough, but now so close to his waking time, his faced showed the tension he was about to face in his day, his brow was creased, and his lips taut rather than relaxed.

 

He’d stayed away from her all night, barely within reach he was so close to the other side of the bed.  But his presence made all the difference in the world to her, and though she had gotten up several times, her sleep was restful.  She jumped when Adam sat straight up.

 

His eyes darted around the room, his search finally falling on Shiloh, and he slowly let out a breath that seemed to deflate his rigidness.   Falling back down on the bed, he stretched his arm out, finding Shiloh’s arm and squeezing gently.

 

“Was that a dream?” she asked.

 

He rolled to his side facing her, moving his hand up to caress her cheek.  “I was late getting into town and missed the morning stage.”

 

“If that’s not a sign you’re working too much, I don’t know what is.  Fear over logic.   The afternoon stage would be fine, and you know it.”

 

He gave her cheek a gentle pat as he moved closer for a morning kiss; just a quick peck before he rose to sit on his side of the bed.  “You know I want to get the drawings on the morning stage.”

 

“I do, but I never imagined it would disturb your sleep.”

 

“I suppose it’s because it’s one thing finished.  Like I’ve made some progress.”

 

She reached across the bed for him, and in doing so, her body twisted.   She groaned.

 

Quickly turning toward her, Adam leaned forward and moved her to her back amid her protests.

 

“I’m all right.”

 

He froze as his eyes met hers.  “I was just trying to help.”

 

Her tension slowly melted into a smile as her hand moved up his arm.  “I know,” she said softly.  “But sometimes I feel….”  She glanced up at his eyes, then down again.  “I don’t want to add to your responsibilities when you have so many.   And I suppose I feel a little…well…I don’t want to bother you.”

 

Shifting to her side of the bed, Adam slowly leaned over her, judging if he was hurting her from the slight changes on her face.   He was pleased nothing significant showed and settled himself half over her.

 

Closing her eyes, she relished the feeling of his body against hers.  It had been so long.

 

“Sweetheart, you’re doing what you need to be doing at the moment, and that’s taking care of Abel.”

 

“I know that, but I could be doing more…”  her face saddened.  “If I could ride, I could take care of the ranch, I could get supplies, and I could run errands for you.”

 

Taking a breath, Adam slowly let it out as he made a decision.  “I’m spending the day with you.”   Shiloh’s eyes widened as her mouth opened, but just before a protest came forth, Adam put a finger to her lips.  “I’ll send Shorty to town with the drawings, and while you spend your morning with Abel, I’ll ride over to the mine, and then to the Flying W to speak with Hank.  How do you feel about riding over to Pa’s house today?   Micah’s been asking to see you and Abel.   And I think you just might be able to handle the buggy ride over.”

 

“What about everything else?”

 

“It’s Sunday, Sweetheart.   I know we haven’t been slowing down on weekends, but maybe it’s time everyone had a day off.  When men get too worn down, accidents happen.”

 

She gently pushed him up and sat up on the side of the bed.  “So when are you going to take your own advice?”

 

Leaning into her ear, he said, “Today,” before he kissed it.

 

Shiloh finished her morning routine in the washroom and as she stood in front of the wardrobe deciding what to wear, she called back to Adam.  “Is Micah able to get up at all?”

 

Adam’s voice was raised a bit so she could hear him from the washroom. “He’s been up on the side of the bed, but Dr. Martin doesn’t want his feet on the floor yet.  He says they could still become infected.”

 

“I have an idea.”

 

Walking into the bedroom in his white drawers, he stopped next to her and reached into the wardrobe.  “And what would that be?”

 

She gave him a quick glance as she braced herself, thinking he might not be receptive to the idea.  “What if we take the wheelchair over to Pa’s…for Micah.   We could move him into the downstairs bedroom, and then he’ll be able to get anywhere he needs to go.”  She held her breath and waited.

 

He stopped for a moment, but then slowly pulled a red shirt out of the wardrobe.  “And what will you do in the evenings when you’re too sore to stand?”

 

“I’ll sit in a chair without wheels.   The last few nights, the wheelchair has stayed in one place in your study.”  She took her skirt and blouse over to the bed and sat down.  “I’m tired of being an invalid.  I just need to push myself.”

 

He turned to face her as he pulled his trousers on.  “And what does Paul think about you pushing yourself?”

 

“I have no idea.  I haven’t spoken to him about it.  Even so, I don’t think I really need the wheelchair.  We have plenty of chairs.”  When Shiloh was dressed, she sat quietly on the bed.

 

Adam approached her as he tucked in his shirt.  “All right.  We’ll take it with us, and while we’re there, we’ll get him moved downstairs.”  He reached out his hand to her.  “And we does not mean you.”

 

“What if he doesn’t want to?” she asked, moving toward the nursery.

 

Raising his brows and wearing an impish grin, Adam replied, “We’ll tell him he can’t hold Abel until he’s moved.”

 

Shiloh brought Abel into the bedroom and looked at him before looking back at Adam.  “Is he still in pain?  Maybe he won’t be able to hold him?”

 

Adam nodded, but said nothing.  When he bent to lift her into his arms, she stepped away.  “I’ll tell you what.  If you’ll carry Abel, I’ll walk down the stairs.”

 

Adam’s mouth dropped open as he gave her a sidelong look.  “Considering how you’re still limping pretty badly, I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

 

She harrumphed, lifted her chin into the air and left the room.

 

***

 

When Adam exited the buggy in the yard at the main house, he leaned back in over Shiloh.  “I’m going to carry you inside.  You barely made it down the stairs, and I’m not having you collapse in the yard.”

 

Abel had been fussy since they’d left, and though Shiloh only had a mile to work with, she managed to satisfy his appetite before they drove into the yard.  She pushed a sound asleep Abel into his father’s arms, and very slowly lowered herself out of the buggy.

 

Adam glared at her.  The only thing that stopped him from barking was his fear of waking Abel.

 

“Stop glaring at me,” she spit as she hobbled around him.  “If you carry me into the house and Micah sees or hears of it, you’ll never convince him to keep the wheelchair.”

 

He commented even though she had already turned away, “I’m not sure I should try to convince him.”

 

When she stopped, she didn’t look back at him, but Adam saw her back stiffen.  Looking forward, she said quietly, “No matter what you do here today, Adam, I will not be using the chair again.  So he might as well have it available.”  She didn’t wait for an answer and continued slowly to the house.

 

Hurrying to catch up, Adam reached for the door latch around her just as she had raised her hand to knock.  “Anybody home?” he asked as he pushed the door open.

 

“Adam?”  Ben’s voice carried around the corner from the desk as he followed it.  “Well, what a surprise!  I would have thought it was much too soon for you to be up and out,” he said as he bent to kiss Shiloh’s cheek.

 

As much as she hurt, she put on a smile for him.  “I actually came to see Micah and bring him a present, but I’m just as happy to see you.  And,” she glanced back at Adam, “we need to speak with you as well.”

 

“Oh?  Is everything all right?” he asked as he moved to Adam’s shoulder and spied his grandson.

 

“All is well, Pa.  Do you want to hold him?  I need to bring…something…in from the wagon.”

 

Wearing a wide grin, Ben reach into Adam’s arms, lifting Abel and then cradling him in his arms.  “And before I forget, I need to talk to you, Adam.  Council business.”

 

“All right.  I’ll be right back,” said Adam, heading out the door.

 

“Shiloh, why don’t we sit down,” said Ben, nodding toward the living area at the same time he smiled down upon his grandson.

 

She paused at the side of the settee considering the chairs, and when she had decided which one she thought would be more comfortable she hobbled over, turned her back to the chair, reached back so that her hands touched the arms and slowly lowered herself onto the firm, blue cushion.

 

Ben watch her slowly, stiffly sit.  “Are you sure you should be up, darling?”

 

She looked down at her hands in her lap and smiled.  “Pa, I was never one who could sit still for very long, yet that’s all I’ve been doing since Abel was born.  I feel if I don’t just get up, I’ll never get up.”   She looked up toward the door when Adam pushed the wheelchair through.  “That’s why I’m leaving the wheelchair for Micah.  Right now, he needs it more than I because he’s the same as me.  If he doesn’t get out of that bed soon and move around, even in the wheelchair, he might not.  I don’t want him to give up.”

 

Pushing the wheelchair near the base of the stairs, Adam stepped in front of it and sat down.  “We thought we’d move Micah down here,” he said, indicating the bedroom next to the dining room.  “He has more room to move around down here.  He can go out on the front porch and enjoy spring, and whenever he’s tired, he can go into his bedroom without much help.  If we put some linen on the floor next to the bed, he might even be able to move from the chair to the bed by himself.”

 

Looking earnestly at her father-in-law, Shiloh added, “I imagine he’s starting to feel he’s a burden.  I think he’ll feel better about being here if he can do some things for himself, Pa.”

 

Ben looked from one to the other and slowly nodded.  “You could be right.  But I’d rather wait for Paul to say whether he can stand.  His feet are still very raw, and Paul said they’ll be very tender for awhile.”

 

“Well,” said Shiloh, pushing herself up from the chair.  “Shall we go tell him?”

 

“You mean ask,” said Ben.

 

“No, I mean tell,” replied Shiloh definitively.  “He’s coming down whether the likes it or not.”

 

Chapter Three

 

Shiloh had insisted going up the stairs on her own which irritated Adam no end.  But he was not prepared to start a yelling match in front of his father, nor was he prepared to listen to Shiloh’s loud objection if he lifted her from her feet despite her objections.  So, he went up behind her ready to steady her if she wavered.

 

He stopped her at the closed bedroom door with a hand on her shoulder.  “Before we go in, I want to talk to you.”

 

She turned her head toward him without turning around.

 

“He’s lost some weight.  He’s still a little pale, and he still looks…sick.  If his feet are uncovered, they’re…”  Taking a deep breath, he looked into her eyes.  “Sweetheart, have you ever seen burns?”

 

She faced forward and shook her head.

 

“His feet are very red…and raw…and seem disfigured because they’re swollen. He’s lost most of the skin on the bottoms of his feet and toes.  I don’t know if they’re covered right now.  Paul said it would be good for the air to get to the healing skin, but Hop Sing still puts salve on them a couple of times a day, and when he does, he wraps them.”  He took her arm and gently turned her to face him.  “I want you to be prepared for what you see.   We’re lucky he’s alive.”

 

“I understand,” she said softly, lowering her eyes.

 

Adam gave her a short nod and reached for the door handle.  When the door was barely open, he asked loudly, “Do you feel like company?”

 

Micah was sitting up in bed, reading a book.  “Yeah, come on in.”

 

Adam pushed the door open for Shiloh to enter, and when Micah realized it was his sister at the door, he quickly pulled the covers over his feet.  “Little Sister, I didn’t think…you’re standing.”

 

Her smile was sweet, and she managed a lilt in her voice.  “Of course I’m on my feet.  It’s impossible to keep a Whitney down for too long.  You should know that.”  She tried not to show her pain, but it was obvious to both Micah and Adam.  Adam had a chair pulled next to the bed before she got there.

 

“Micah, you look like you’ve been to hell and back.”

 

He laid the book down at his side and smiled.  “I could say the same about you, but actually, you look lovely.   Except when you walk.  You look like an old lady.”

 

In that moment the look that passed between them, a look certainly of love, but also understanding, made Adam realize how much they favored each other.  The way they each tilted their heads with two sets of bright blue eyes gazing each at the other, and the way they wore slight smiles…anyone who didn’t know them might have thought them twins.

 

Shiloh glanced back over her shoulder to make sure Adam was right behind her.  “We have something for you, but you have to come downstairs to see it.”

 

“By it do you mean him?”

 

A wide smile appeared on Shiloh’s face.  “Well, that, too, but I really do mean it.   We want you to move to the downstairs bedroom, so you have more to see…so you can be part of all that goes on here, and so you can spend some time on the porch enjoying the nice weather.”

 

“And just how am I gonna do that?  I’ve not been given permission to put my feet on the floor.”

 

Shiloh leaned to one side and looked up over her shoulder at Adam.

 

“Ah,” Adam started, raising his brows.  Truthfully, he hadn’t thought about how to get Micah down the stairs without Hoss.  “I think…that maybe…Pa and I can get you down.  You’ve lost some weight.”

 

Furrows appeared in Micah’s forehead.  “And who’s going to get me back up here at night?”

 

“You’re not coming back up,” said Shiloh, leaning forward to pat Micah’s hand.  “You’re moving to the bedroom downstairs.”

 

“It doesn’t sound like I have a choice,” said Micah, crossing his arms in front of him.

 

“Well, Abel is downstairs.  If you’d like to see him, you’ll have to come down.”  With that, Shiloh stood.  “I’ll go relieve Pa of his grandfather responsibilities so he and Adam can get you downstairs.  If you still feel like it when you get settled, you can try out your uncle responsibilities.”  Micah had opened his mouth to object to her bossiness, but didn’t have the chance.  She left the room much faster than either he or Adam thought possible.

 

Looking annoyed at Adam, Micah harrumphed.  “Who made her the boss?”

 

Chuckling, Adam replied, “She did.  She’s in pain, and she’s short tempered at the moment.  But if you want to risk life and limb, I’ll go get her.”

 

“You could just tell her.”

 

“Oh no.  I have to go home with her.  No, you will be the one who takes his immediate well-being into his own hands,” answered Adam with an impish grin.

 

***

 

Hoss sat on a log in the bright sunshine just outside the teepee he shared with Annie.  He’d spent several hours again in the dark, sweaty tent as he had been since he’d arrived at the Washoe encampment.

 

A illness was passing through the tribe, taking some of the very small and very old.  Annie and Cheron had their hands full, moving from hut to hut to tend the sick and dying.  Annie had no idea what the sickness was nor what might have started it, and Cheron had never seen anything like it.  Others were sick, too, but most of the strong survived.

 

Still, Hoss watched as another small body was taken from one of the teepees, held in its mother’s arms until they reached the pyre kept burning throughout the day and night.  The elders of the tribe as well as the one who talked to the Great Spirit stood vigil over the spirits rising with smoke and embers to the sky.  This child made eighteen that he’d counted.

 

He wanted to do more to help, but taking care of the ill was women’s work in this tribe.   And taking care of the dead was something a white man would never be allowed to do.

 

He began to weave the leather of the headstall he was making for Chu’o again, but stopped when Annie came from the teepee from which the child had been taken.  She carried a  wooden bowl filled with cloth and looked out toward the pyre.  Cheron stepped out behind her carrying several deerskin pouches, looking in the same direction.   Moving her hand to Annie’s shoulder, she waited for Annie to turn to look at her, then nodded in the direction of the wiki-up where the medicinal herbs were hung to dry.

 

Tying the last knot in the headstall, Hoss hung it from a pole just inside the flap of their tent, then stood and met them at the door of the medicine hut.  Annie’s face spoke volumes of her feelings of helplessness, especially for the children lost.  Hoss moved his arms around her and held her tight.  “Annie, you cain’t let it get to you like this.  You know there’s always gonna be some sickness or other that takes lives…’specially the little ‘uns ’cause they’re just too small and weak to fight.” Still holding Annie, Hoss looked at Cheron, who had already gone inside the hut and left the flap open.  “Cheron, have you and Annie had anything to eat.”

 

“We have not had time, Hoss.   And there are more of my people we must tend.”

 

“If you don’t eat to keep up your strength, you’re gonna be joinin’ ’em.  How about I go ask Di’na to bring something over to the hut,” he said, nodding toward the hut he and Annie shared.  “You two can take a few minutes to eat and drink.”

 

Annie hadn’t tried to move away from Hoss.  She leaned against him heavily, but remained still.

 

Coming out of the medicine tent, Cheron turned Annie’s face to her.  “Hoss is right.  We must take time to eat.”

 

Taking Annie by her arms, Hoss looked into her eyes.  “I’ll go find Di’na.  I’ll be right back.  There’s some  fresh water already over there.”

 

Annie turned in silence and followed Cheron to the hut.  When Di’na appeared with several bowls, Hoss and the three women sat in a circle and ate.

 

“E’tsi, do you know what the sickness is?” asked Di’na, Cheron’s daughter.

 

As Cheron explained what she and Annie had concluded, she picked at her food.  “Those who have left us ate at the fire of Me’ma’to se three moons ago.”  She looked at Annie.

 

“Di’na, we found mushrooms in So’te’s hut,” explained Annie.

 

Di’na mouthed out the word slowly.

 

Smiling, Annie said the word again, “Mush…room.  U’wa’se,” bringing an understanding nod from Di’na.

 

“Some were those you find near the village,” continued Annie.  “But there were others that looked close to the same, but they were not.  They are not good to eat.  We believe they are what brought the sickness.”

 

Cheron took her daughter’s hand.   “So’te is young.  Me’ma’to se did not look at the u’wa’se before they were prepared. We must find where So’te found the u’wa’se and burn them.  They are so close to the u’wa’se we have always eaten, others may do the same.”

 

“I will take Do’a to help find them.”

 

“Go to So’te’s hut,” said Cheron.  “She can show you where she found them.”

 

Standing straight up from a cross-legged position, Di’na ran to find her brother.  As Hoss watched her leave, he asked, “Does everyone else know about these mushrooms?”

 

“Yes,” replied Annie.  “We just found them in So’te’s hut a little while ago, and we have others spreading the word.  That’s what the women have been throwing in the center fire.  I’m afraid they’re throwing good mushrooms away, too, but they’re scared.”

 

“I don’t understand.  These mushrooms must have always been there,” said Hoss.

 

“So’te is young”, said Cheron.  She has just taken a husband.  She went much further to find u’wa’se because she had seen ones that were like those we find close to the village, but bigger.  Our young women are taught to gather from the places we know.  She thought the big u’wa’se would please Me’ma’to se, her mother.  And Me’ma’to se did not look at So’te’s basket when she returned.  Our ways to teach were not followed.”

 

Hoss took the last of the food from his bowl, and wiped his fingers on his trousers.  “She must be feeling pretty awful.”

 

Taking a deep breath, Cheron sat up straight and stretched her back.  “So’te and Me’ma’to se will be punished.”  When both Annie and Hoss looked at each other in alarm, Cheron explained, “Many have died because our teachings were not followed.  It is our teachings that keep us safe from such things.”

 

“What will happen to them?” asked Annie.

 

Cheron closed her eyes.  “I understand that you do not believe…an…accident…to be punishable.  But you must understand that the lives of our people depend on those who provide for us.”  Her shoulders slumped as she lowered her head.  “I would ask Chu’o to make the punishment less.  But with so many who have died, I know he will not.  They will be whipped.”  Looking sadly out over the village, she finished softly, “And I will tend their wounds once it is done.”

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter Four

 

With one arm over the shoulders of each man, Micah nervously rode as Adam and Ben, each with an arm around Micah’s back and a hand under one of his legs, carried Micah down the stairs, one painfully slow step at a time.

As they took that last step, Micah said wearily, “Just take me straight to the bedroom.  I need to lie down for a few minutes.”

Shiloh sat watching the slow descent from the edge of the settee, wincing with each and every step Adam and Ben took, but more so from the strain she could see on Micah’s face.  She was sure it wasn’t pain causing his tension, but rather having to rely on someone else to transport him, no matter who it was or how much he trusted them.   He’d never admit it, but Shiloh knew well that Micah Whitney was a proud man who at the moment was in a position that compromised that pride.

She entered the room after Adam and Ben had slowly laid Micah on the bed.  “What can I do for you?” she asked, leaning over him with a loving gaze and brushing his hair back over his forehead.

Taking a deep breath, he bit his bottom lip.  Part of him was angry at her for assuming everyone was going to do what she wanted.  The other part of him knew she thought things through and was doing this not only out of love, but because in the end, she was right.  It would be better for him if he wasn’t confined to the room upstairs.  And who better to know that than Shiloh from her own recent experience with confinement.  Quietly, he said as he grabbed her hand and kissed it, “Sometimes, Sis, I wish you’d let me get used to an idea before you inflict it upon me.  But you’re just like Mom was.  She always said ‘mothers know best.’”   A smile stole over his lips.  “And you are a mother now.”

Returning the smile, she asked, “Do you feel like being an uncle for little while.  If you’ll sit up, I’ll bring him in.”

“You mean I don’t have to try the wheelchair?”

She narrowed her eyes.  “I’m not that bad, am I?”  She didn’t wait for an answer and smiled.  “I didn’t think about this at first, but I think we need to talk to Paul before you use the chair.  Your feet will have to rest on the footrests, and as I understand it, he doesn’t want your feet on the floor yet.  He may not want them on the footrests.”

“So all this was for nothing?” Micah barked.

Standing straight up like a schoolmarm disciplining one of her wards, Shiloh answered, “Absolutely not.  You can hear what’s going on, and if it comes right down to getting you out into the fresh air, we’ll put pillows under your knees to keep your feet off the footrests.”

When he held out his hand to hers, she noticed the tremble.  “Maybe we should wait to introduce you to Abel.   You’re in pain.”  Turning to Adam who had been leaning against the door frame, she asked, “Would you mind bringing down the laudanum?”

“Nope.”  He leaned to the side to see Micah.  “And I’ll bring down the rest of your things as well.”

“Thanks, Adam.”  Though he was disappointed about missing Abel, he knew he wouldn’t be able to stand the pain much longer.  His last dose of laudanum had already worn off.  “If you can stay a little while, it doesn’t take long for me to gather my wits about me after I’ve had a dose.”

Hearing the conversation from the leather chair in the sitting room, Ben wandered into the bedroom and moved his hands to Shiloh’s shoulders.  “Why don’t you two just stay for lunch?  That’ll give Micah time to deal with the laudanum and have something to eat, so he can see Abel before you leave.”

Smiling sweetly up at her father-in-law, she nodded.

Hop Sing announced that lunch was ready just as Joe came through the front door.  Adam and Ben had moved chairs into Micah’s room so he would be included in the mealtime conversation.

Joe followed Shiloh as she brought Abel in and laid him on the bed next to his uncle who had just stirred from the grogginess left by the laudanum.  “I didn’t think you’d mind the company in your bed,” said Shiloh softly as Joe cooed at his nephew while she adjusted his little blanket.

“He’s asleep?” asked Micah.

“He’s asleep most of the time,” answered Shiloh.  “Except when he’s hungry or needs to be changed.”

“Well I’ll be.  Look at all that dark hair,” said Micah, admiring his nephew.  At that moment, Abel sucked in his bottom lip, whimpered once, and then smiled causing Micah’s lower jaw to drop at the same time he laughed.  “You’re in trouble,” he said, glancing up at Shiloh.

“Why is that?”

“He’s gonna be popular with the ladies, same as his pa.  Look at his dimples.”

Sitting in a chair near the door, Adam rolled his eyes.  “My dimples never got me anywhere.”

“Not true,” argued Micah.  “Your dimples always got your foot in the door.  It was your dry, educated conversation that shut anything promising down.”

While taking the plate Hop Sing offered her, Shiloh chimed in, “I happen to enjoy his dimples and his educated conversation.”

The corner of Adam’s mouth turned up as he gave Micah a quick affirming nod.  “There, you see?”

“It was his narrow-minded bossiness that irked me.”

“Here, here,” said Joe with a mouthful.

Snapping his head around with his mouth slightly open, Adam replied testily, “Never mind.”

Shiloh giggled as she bit into her sandwich, chewed and swallowed.  “Micah, if Paul says you can use the wheelchair, how would you like to do some paperwork?”  Both Ben and Adam’s heads popped up from their plates, grabbing Shiloh’s attention.  “If he feels like it, what’s the harm?  In fact, it could help a great deal with everything that needs to be done around here.  You three can be directing all the physical work without having to worry about when the paperwork is going to get done.  Micah and I should be able to handle most of it, and for those things that need a decision, we’ll be able to present it so you don’t have to pore over it.  That should make things move along, don’t you think?” she said, nodding hopefully.

Ben raised his eyebrows.  “Don’t you think that would be up to Micah?”

“She’s right, Mr. Cartwright,” said Micah.  “I already feel bad enough that I can’t even handle my own ranch or the mine.  If I can be of help in some way, I’m more than willing.”

“Micah, you don’t have to feel bad because you’re not on your feet,” admonished Adam.  He pointed his fork at Micah.  “You’re as much family as any one of us.”

Folding his lips, Micah looked at Adam, then Joe and finally Ben and nodded.  “Dad picked his friends well.”

“I could say the same thing,” said Adam with a wide grin.

***

“Annie, I cain’t stand by and watch while them women are beaten,” said Hoss, turning his back on Cheron with his hands shoved in his pockets.

 

“If you interfere,” said Cheron with no emotion, “Chu’o will kill you.”

 

Annie’s mouth dropped open.  “Cheron, surely you can do something?”

 

“I cannot.  It is our law.  Our law is that which keeps us safe.”   Turning quickly, she continued.  “If you cannot abide by our laws, you both must leave.”  Her brows turned into an agonized frown.  “For your own good,” she finished quietly.  “I can do nothing more for Hoss’s eyes.  They will finish healing with time.”

 

Moving a hand to Cheron’s shoulder, Annie said, “We will leave.”

 

Cheron reached up to Annie’s hand.  “On the new day.  I will ask Chu’o to wait.”

 

The following morning, while Annie packed those things given to her by Cheron, Hoss loaded their wagon with the things they had brought with them.  They were largely left alone by the members of the Washoe tribe.

 

Hoss ducked into their wiki-up.  “You ready?” he asked softly.

 

Annie was on her knees, moving the last of the herbs she was taking with her into a box, and sat back on her legs.  “This happened so suddenly, Hoss.  I never thought we’d be leaving like this.”

 

Reaching down for her hand, he gently pulled her to her feet and embraced her.  “Cheron don’t mean nothin’ by it.  It’s just their way.  I reckon things could get bad for her if she keeps buckin’ her husband.”  He kissed her tenderly.  “It’s time to go.”

 

Before Hoss could help Annie into the seat of the wagon, Cheron approached and smiled.  “This,” she said, handing a bundle to Annie, “is for you to take with you.  The women of the tribe have been weaving since you arrived.  With these blankets in your house, the Great Spirit will always protect you.”

 

Taking her medical bag from under the seat of the wagon, Annie held it out to Cheron.  “I’ve shown you how to use these instruments.  I want you to have this.”

 

This was one of the very rare times when Cheron’s lips turned into a bright, beautiful smile.  “I thought you would be angry,” she said as she reached for Annie and drew her into a hug.

 

“It’s difficult to understand, Cheron,” Annie whispered in her ear, “but I respect your ways.  I’m not angry.  But I am sorry we have to part so soon.”

 

Hoss pulled the reins and headstall he’d made for Chu’o from the back of the wagon and placed them in Cheron’s hands.

 

She held them up and admired the dark, soft, braided leather decorated with smooth, polished pink quartz stones.  “Hoss, I did not know,” she said surprised.  “The work is good…as good as I have seen from my people.  Chu’o may seem angry you are here, but he has told me it has not been so bad.  He thinks you are funny, Hoss.  And he will know you have a good heart.”

 

“If you need anything, Cheron, you know where to find us.  My pa would never turn any of your people away.  You remember that.”

 

“I will remember, Hoss.”  She turned to Annie.  “And I will remember your teachings.”

 

“And I will remember yours,” answered Annie with another hug.  “We should go.”

 

Once Hoss helped Annie into the seat of the wagon, he climbed up on the other side and took the reins.

 

Annie cleared her throat.  “Can you see the road enough to drive?”

 

He looked at her and twisted his lips, then looked forward, first leaning to the right and looking down next to the horses, then looking left.  “Well, as long as I can tell the difference between the light brown of the road and the dark brown or gray of the pine needles or rocks, I’ll be all right.”

 

“You can see that?” asked Annie excitedly.  “Why didn’t you say something?”

 

“I ain’t really thought about it.   Everything’s kinda brown in the village, and I ain’t been allowed very far from our hut.  Now how ’bout you and me go home.  I’ll bet they could all use some help,” he said, smiling.

 

As Hoss flicked the reins and the wagon lurched forward, both he and Annie waved back to Cheron while the women of the village stopped what they were doing and became still as they watched the white woman and her husband drive away.

 

Chapter Five

 

As Adam lifted Shiloh from her chair, Ben pulled the blanket up and over Micah, then took Abel into his arms and quietly left the bedroom behind Adam.  Nodding toward the stairs, Adam continued up while Ben eased into the leather chair to enjoy the various expressions his grandson made in his sleep.

 

Adam chuckled as he trotted back down the stairs and got comfortable in the blue chair.  “I do believe the Whitney side of the family, and that includes Cartwrights with Whitney blood,” he said, indicating his son in his father’s lap, “has left us for the next few hours.”  Wearing a sudden playful grin, he asked, “Checkers?”

 

Ben matched his son’s smile.  It had been some time since he’d had the pleasure of sharing a game of checkers with his eldest son, the only one of three who could actually challenge him.  “What about?”  he asked, nodding down at his grandson.

 

Joe had just walked in from the kitchen when Adam said, “I’ll bet Uncle Joe won’t mind holding him.”

 

Smiling, Joe answered, “It’s about time I get to spend more than a second with my nephew.  Hand him over,” he said as he flopped into the other leather chair.

 

As Ben lowered Abel into Joe’s arms, he said, “Now Joseph, he’s not a puppy.  Make sure…”

 

“I know, Pa.  Make sure his head is supported.”  Ben lightly growled.  “Adam told me that the first time I held him.”   Glancing up at his father, Joe recognized the stony gaze and wilted.  “Sorry, Pa.  I shouldn’t have interrupted.”

 

“Hmf,” was Ben’s only response as he turned toward the checkerboard Adam had already placed on the table.

 

“Pa, you said something about council business?  I didn’t miss a meeting again, did I?” asked Adam as both men placed their checkers on the appropriate squares.

 

“No.  I saw Frank briefly in town last week.  He wants to meet to discuss our bid for the state capital.  He said he knew we were busy, so he’d come out here.  He’ll be here tomorrow night.”

 

“I thought Carson City was favored because of the fear that Virginia City will have nothing to offer after the mines play out.”  Adam looked at his father with raised eyebrows.  “They will eventually play out.”

“We know that, but that doesn’t mean Virginia City will die.  It supports many of the ranches, and as a state capital it will certainly develop more interests.  We’re bigger…we have a larger population, and we have more established businesses that can support the additional people.  Carson City is barely a city.  The population isn’t even a tenth of ours.”

“Pa, we’re covered in snow in the winter, and even if there’s no snow in Virginia City, getting in and out is a problem because of it.  Besides that, where are we going to build a capitol building?   There isn’t any flat property big enough for a capitol building within miles of Virginia City.   And building it on the side of mountain will just make it harder to get to in winter.”

Before the first move was made, it seemed the two men were at odds.  Ben glared angrily at his son for a moment, but when Adam met the glare with a crooked grin, Ben looked down at his hands, shook his head and chuckled.   “All valid points.”

“They’re gonna come up.   We have to know how we’re gonna answer them.”   With that said, Adam, who commanded the red checkers, made his first move.

Joe had fallen asleep slouched down in the chair with one leg over the arm and Abel sleeping peacefully on his chest until the second move of the second game.  No one had noticed the little stretch or the twist of the head followed by the toothless gnawing of the little fist.  Even Joe slept through most of it…until Abel realized no one was paying attention.  When he announced in no uncertain terms that he wanted what only his mother could give him, the men all took immediate notice, but especially Joe.   He held Abel up in the air, looking down at the wet dark spot on his shirt, then proceeded to turn pale and give the child a sickly half-hearted smile.

 

By that time, Adam was upon them, taking Abel from Joe’s hands, but holding the child out, much like Joe had done.  “Pa, would you mind getting a towel from the kitchen?”

 

“Why don’t you just take him upstairs?” asked Joe, now standing and plucking the front of his wet shirt from the skin of his chest.

 

Adam blew his cheeks out stifling a laugh.  “Because I don’t want to hand him over to Shiloh in this condition.  She’ll make my ears bleed she’ll be so angry.”

 

Ben returned with the towel and wrapped it around the baby.  “Why don’t you run up and bring down a diaper. We can change him before she sees him.”

 

“I don’t know what the problem is,” said Joe.  “Babies wet themselves all the time, don’t they?”

 

“They do,” answered Adam as he climbed the stairs.  “But if they’ve been wet too long they get a rash.”

 

Joe looked down at his shirt in a panic.  “You mean…”  He didn’t finish but rather busied himself with removing his shirt.  Looking at his father sheepishly, he wadded the shirt into a ball and excused himself.  “I need to…wash up.”

 

Adam passed Joe on the way back down the stairs carrying the sheet of flannel that served as a diaper, and just as he reached Abel who Grandpa was tending on the towel on the table, Hop Sing entered with a bowl of warm water, a cloth, and some foul smelling white powder.

 

Adam sniffed the air and scowled before he began removing Abel’s little dress.  Everything was soaked through, so the child had to be stripped down to nothing.  He carefully bathed Abel in warm water and reached for the extra towel Hop Sing had thought to bring in from the kitchen.  Just as he was about to apply the flannel covering, Hop Sing grunted.

 

Looking over, Adam raised an eyebrow anticipating that Hop Sing had something to say.

 

“Shake on cloth,” he said, passing Adam a bowl.

 

Adam sniffed the bowl and turned up his nose.  “It smells burnt.  What is it?”

 

“It flour.  Stop rash.”

 

Taking the bowl, Adam reluctantly lifted Abel’s legs and sprinkled flour on the flannel before he folded it over and pinned it.  Though Abel was quiet through the changing, as soon as it was over, he gave his father a seriously perturbed glare and bellowed such that he woke his mother.  Before Adam got to the bottom of the stairs, she was standing at the top.

 

Her eyes were wide, her jaw set, her lips folded into a tight line.  “What happened to his clothes?”

 

At the bottom of the stairs, Adam rolled his eyes. “He was wet.  I took everything off when I changed him, but that was after he decided he was hungry.”  When she reached for the baby upon his arrival at the top of the stairs, Adam pulled Abel away.  “Uh uh.  I’ll follow you to the bedroom, and once you’re settled I’ll give him to you.”

 

“What is that smell?” she asked, turning up her nose and scowling.

 

Adam smiled nervously.  “Oh, well.  Hop Sing suggested we put…flour…on his diaper…to prevent rashes.”

 

Arching one eyebrow, she tilted her head and looked him square in the eye.  “And why are we worried about rashes…unless he was wet for awhile?”

 

Clearing his throat, Adam glanced down at his father who was trying to hide his smile.  Speaking over Abel’s increasing insistence, he said, “Why don’t we go get him settled, and I’ll tell you all about it?”

 

Ben waited for the bedroom door to thump closed until he laughed out loud.

 

In only a few minutes, Adam slowly strode down the stairs wearing a smile.  He resumed his seat in front of the checkerboard, motioning for his father to take his seat on the other side.

 

“It must not have been too bad considering how you came back down,” said Ben as he studied the checkers.  “Whose turn is it?”

 

“It’s yours,” answered Adam, moving to the edge of the blue chair and leaning over the checkerboard.  “When she has Abel in her arms, everything changes.  I knew she’d be a good mother, but to see her with him….  I’ve never imagined such instant devotion.”

 

“Oh,” said Ben, his hand hovering over the object of his next move.  “Have you forgotten how she fought to have him?”  He glanced up.  “She was devoted to Abel before he was born.”  He smiled and made his move.

 

With a satisfied, distant look, Adam nodded.  “She was.  She is.  I’d never have thought it was possible when she came home from college.  She was hard.  Unforgiving.  Unbending.”  He let out a contented breath, then moved a red checker.

 

***

 

Adam and Shiloh sat in their bed, both leaning back against the headboard, both watching Abel as Adam gently moved him from side to side trying to get him to open his eyes.

 

“He’s such a calm child, at least until he’s hungry,” said Shiloh, giggling.

 

“Well, he’s only four weeks old.  We just have to give him time.”

 

She giggled again as she caressed his head. “He seems to be getting a little thin on top of his head.  I wonder if he’ll lose all of his hair and have nothing but fuzz for awhile.  Oh look.  A dimple.  What do you suppose he’s smiling about?”

 

“I doubt he’s doing it consciously.”

 

Just then, Abel made a long, drawn out grunt.

 

“You don’t suppose he’s filling up his diaper, do you?” asked Adam.

 

Taking a deep breath, Shiloh answered, “I don’t smell anything but burnt flour.  Is that really supposed to prevent a rash?”

 

Adam leaned away and looked at her.  “You’re doubting Hop Sing?”

 

“No,” she said, chuckling. “I suppose not.  Would you do something for me…us?”

 

“Mm hm,” he said, bringing Abel up and kissing his cheek.

 

“Would you play your new guitar for us…and maybe sing?  I’ve only seen you play it once or twice.  Don’t you like it?”

 

“Of course I like it,” he said, passing Abel to her and moving to the side of the bed.   “I just haven’t had much time.”

 

“Well, we have all evening, at least until dinner.  Please?” she asked sweetly.

 

Bending over her, he kissed her, paying slow attention to the fullness of her lips.  Lingering, he looked into her eyes, then back to her lips, feeling desire welling up within him.  She was more lovely now than ever, more open than ever, more vulnerable than ever.  Though he wanted her, he simply kissed her again and slowly moved away.  He didn’t want her to feel pressured or rushed, and he certainly didn’t want to hurt her.  “All in good time,” he thought as he moved away to get his guitar.

 

Chapter Six

 

It was the middle of the day when the wagon rattled into the yard of the main house.  Hoss looked up at the house as if he was seeing it for the first time.

 

“I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of looking at this place again,” he said with a smile while searching for Annie’s hand.  When he found it, he brought it to his lips.  “You weren’t really here long enough to think about this place as your home, was ya?”  He turned to see her sweet smile.  “That is, if you want this to be your home.”

 

Puzzlement washed over her face.  “Where else would home be?”

 

Taking her other hand, he ran his thumb over her knuckles. “Pa gave me some land, just like he did Adam and Joe.  I call it Hoss’s Heaven.  I thought maybe we could build our own place out there.  Raise our children there.  Of course, we’ll stay here until we can build a house.  Pa wouldn’t mind the company at all, ‘specially with Adam gone. That breakfast table probably seems a little lopsided.”

 

Moving her hand to his cheek, she answered, “Hoss, I don’t mind being here for as long as we’re here.  I love your pa.  He’s already been so good to me.  And Shiloh is just down the road, so I won’t feel quite so outnumbered by you men.  No, I think I’d like to just get settled before I decide how to go about getting some patients.  Dr. Martin is the likely place to start, but I don’t think he’s going anywhere.”

 

After a slow, tender kiss, Hoss stepped down from the wagon and turned, taking a waiting Annie by the waist and floating her down.

 

“I wonder if anyone’s home,” said Hoss as he took Annie’s hand and headed for the front door.  Stepping inside, he yelled, “Anybody home?”

 

“What’s all the noise out there?” came a voice from the downstairs bedroom.  “Hoss?  Is that you?”

 

“Micah?”  Looking back at Annie with his brows raised and a half smile, Hoss rounded the corner and stepped into the open door of the bedroom.  “When’d you get down here?  I’d a thought you’d still be upstairs.”

 

“Shiloh’s idea,” Micah answered, setting his book aside.  “I guess with her experience with confinement, she decided it wasn’t good for me, even though I’m still confined.”

 

“Well, you’re lookin’ mighty good considerin’.   But I thought it’d take a lot longer than this.  You ain’t walkin’ yet, are ya?”

 

Micah took a deep breath as he watched Annie move to the foot of the bed.  “I’m still a long way from that.  They aren’t healed yet.  Paul said even when they are, they’ll be tender for a long time.”

 

“May I?” asked Annie motioning to the two lumps underneath the blanket.

 

“You can’t see anything.  Hop Sing wrapped ’em about a half hour ago.”

 

“Well, maybe later,” she said, smiling.  “Where is everyone?”

 

“Little lady, this is a working ranch.  They’re out counting heads.”

 

“Maybe I ought to go out and help once we get the wagon unloaded,” said Hoss.

 

“Wait,” said Micah with a slow grin.  “You can see?”

 

Hoss shoved his hands in his pockets.  “Well, my eyes ain’t perfect.  But they’re good enough to tell the north end from the south end of a steer.” Turning for the door, he pointed, “I’ll go start unloadin’ the wagon.”   Stepping out of the room, he ran headlong into Hop Sing, quickly steadying the tray that almost landed on the floor.

 

With stormy eyes, Hop Sing yelled, “You watch where go!”  It didn’t take long for his eyes to become as bright as his smile. “Mista Hoss, you home!  Missy Annie, too?”

 

“I’m here, Hop Sing,” called Annie from the bedroom.

 

“I bring Mista Micah lunch.  I bring more.”  After setting the tray over Micah’s lap, Hop Sing scurried back to the kitchen.

 

“I’ll go see if I can help. Excuse me,” said Annie, disappearing out the door.

 

Smiling as Annie passed him, Hoss said, “And I’m gonna start unloading.  Maybe I can get it done and head out to help some with the roundup.”

 

***

 

Shiloh sat in the chair by the fireplace frowning. Abel slept peacefully in his cradle beside her.  She looked down at him, shifted in the chair and exhaled slowly, the frown never relenting.  Thinking back to that one day almost a month ago when Adam actually took a day off, she allowed a small smile to pass over her lips, remembering how his long, lovely fingers glided over the strings of the guitar she’d given him for Christmas, the sound rich and clean, and his voice so steady, so deep and so….perfect.  She giggled and looked around her thinking how naughty her next thought was.  So…covetable.

 

She exhaled the smile off her face.  He was out on the ranch, God knew where.  He’d come home with just enough time to clean up for dinner.  He’d wolf his food down, kiss her on the top of the head, kiss Abel on his forehead and disappear into his office.  Again.

 

She wouldn’t even have a chance to tell him what he missed today.  Or the day before, or the day before that.  It seemed Adam had always taken time with Abel when Abel was asleep or about to fall asleep.  He left Shiloh and Abel alone in the mornings when she fed and bathed him.  He ate dinner so fast, spending all of that time in short conversation with her, then went straight to his office.  He came up to bed late after Shiloh had already fed and put Abel down for the night.

 

He’d missed the way Abel looked at her, the way he reached out to her, the way he had started getting excited, kicking his legs when she lifted him from his crib in the morning. He hadn’t seen all the things Abel was trying to fit into his little mouth and drooling all over.  He didn’t even know that she was taking Abel outside for walks down to the main road and back or that she had begun to play her piano again, many times with Abel on her lap leaning against her.

 

Besides all that, she knew Adam couldn’t keep this pace up.  She was dreading the day when Pa or Joe came to tell her there’d been an accident.

 

“Mrs. Cartwright?”

 

Shiloh had been so deep in thought she hadn’t heard Ming Lin approach and almost jumped out of the chair.

 

“I am sorry, Mrs. Cartwright.  I did not mean to startle you.”

 

She turned and smiled.  “It’s all right, Ming Lin.  I was just thinking.”

 

“You’re lunch is ready.  Would you like to eat at the table or here on the lap board?”

 

“I need to get up anyway.  I’ll eat at the table.”

 

***

 

Still with iron in hand, Ben stood from his bent position over the fire used to heat the branding iron until it was red hot.  He looked out over the backs of the vast Ponderosa herd.

 

Adam had just knelt down next to him to add wood to the fire.  “Pa, you can put the iron back in the fire.”  Looking in the direction of his father’s gaze, Adam nodded, acknowledging the fact that his father hadn’t heard him.  He stood, looking out with his father, cocking his head to one side.  “That can’t be.”

 

Ben glanced back at him.  “You can see better than I can.  Who is it?”

 

“If I didn’t know better, Pa, I’d say it was Hoss.”

 

The two men waited until the rider and his horse rounded the herd and slowly headed into the camp.  Adam chuckled.  “Pa, you’re slippin.’”

 

Ben had been smiling, but grumbled, “What do you mean?”

 

“Well, you’d think you’d know your own son.”  With the corner of his mouth turned up, Adam tapped his father’s chest with the back of his hand and walked forward with Ben chuckling and shaking his head as he followed.

 

As Hoss approached, Joe rode up stringing a calf along behind him.  Wrapping the rope around the saddle horn, he dismounted and walked up next to his father and oldest brother.
“Don’t tell me you put me in charge.  That means I have to rope ’em, sit on ’em and brand ’em all by myself.”

 

Adam gave Joe a sly wink, then lifted his chin in Hoss’s direction as he removed his gloves and shoved them in his back pocket.

 

“Is that…” A wide grin took over Joe’s face.  “Is that Hoss?”  Before anyone could answer, Joe tossed his hat into the air and let out a loud whoop.  Hoss had barely dismounted when Joe jumped into his arms.  By the time Ben and Adam reached Hoss, Joe was standing on his own two feet again, but his smile never wavered.

 

Hoss stepped into Adam, giving him a bear hug that made Adam groan.  “What’s a matter with you, Adam?”  Taking a step back, Hoss looked him up and down. “You done lost some weight.  Don’t you go getting puny, now.  Ain’t Ming Lin been feedin’ you?” he asked, lightly slapping Adam’s stomach.

 

Adam’s smile faltered before he bolstered it while rubbing the sting away from his stomach.  He wasn’t about to tell Hoss he and Joe were doing double the work since Hoss had been gone.

 

Before Hoss noticed Adam’s waning smile, he was already hugging his father who held on a little longer, a little tighter.  “Hoss, you can see?” he asked quietly.

 

Nodding, Hoss scratched the side of his nose.  “Well, yeah, Pa, but it’s not real sharp…still a little fuzzy around the edges.  But it’s enough.”

 

Adam squinted up into the sky, and without looking at Hoss, asked, “What did Cheron say?”

 

“She said she’d done all she could.  My eyes will eventually heal.”  Hoss shoved his hands in his pockets.  “She didn’t say how long.”  Looking up at his father, he continued, “But Pa, I can see enough to round up steers and brand em’.  That’s why I came out.  To help you fellers.  Now why don’t we quit jawin’ and get back to work.”

 

They all smiled, Joe clapping Hoss on the back.  “I tell you what.  I’ll still rope ’em and drag ’em in if you’ll sit on ’em while Adam does the branding.  That way Pa can concentrate on counting.”

 

“Shucks, Joe, ain’t we got hired hands to do all that?”

 

Adam folded his lips into a tight line.  “We’ve been spread a little thin with you and Micah down.  Some are doing fence and barn repairs, some are doing road repairs, and the rest of ’em are rounding up strays and moving the herd around.”

 

“Hey Adam, what about the loggin’?  asked Hoss as he took the rope holding the calf from Joe and pulled the calf toward the fire.

 

“I’ve got a small crew cutting at the moment.  We had some men early on, but it kept snowing, so they went back down into the valley to look for work.  They’re slowly coming back.  And Philip Deidesheimer sent out a fella to handle the mine.”

 

“Well Adam, if you got people taking care of the loggin’ and the minin’, how come you’re startin’ to look so scrawny?”

 

With wide eyes and a sarcastic smirk, Adam answered, “Because I just hired someone to supervise the work at the mine.”  He bent and shoved the iron in the fire. “I still have to deal with the Flying W, even though Hank handles a lot of it.  And then there’s Slater and Cartwright.”

 

Hoss knelt down, bringing the calf down with him and moving a leg over the animal.  “I guess you ain’t been spendin’ much time with Shiloh and the baby.  How’s she doin’ anyway?”

 

Standing from kneeling in front of the fire, waiting for the iron to turn red, Adam bent over the calf and pressed the iron into the flesh of its thigh.  “She’s better, but she’s still in some pain.” He smiled.  “Abel’s growing. He’s strong and healthy.”

 

“Well, at least that’s somethin’,” said Hoss as he clamped down on the calf while Adam branded him.

 

“Why don’t you and Shiloh come to the house for dinner tonight?” asked Ben who had walked up behind them.  “Hoss and Annie can catch up with what’s been happening.”

 

While Hoss untied the calf, Adam pushed the iron back in the fire.  “That’s fine, Pa, but we can’t stay late.  I still have to do some work tonight.”

 

Chapter Seven

 

Adam rode into the barn, dismounted and began settling Sport for the evening.  When he finished, he walked swiftly to the house and stepped in the front door.  “Shiloh!”

 

He listened for an answer while he removed his hat and gun belt, and when one didn’t come, he called again.  Again, he heard nothing and tried again at the bottom of the stairs.

 

“She is not in the house, Mr. Cartwright,” said Ming Lin who was standing at the corner that separated the dining room from the kitchen.

 

The voice Adam had not expected startled him, and he turned around quickly.  “Where is she?”

 

“She went for her afternoon walk.”

 

Adam cocked his head.  “Her afternoon walk?”

 

“Yes, Mr. Cartwright.  She has been walking down to the main road each afternoon for several weeks now.”

 

Furrowing his brow, Adam tightened his lips and breathed heavily through his nose.  “I just came up from the main road, and I didn’t see her.  Does she walk anywhere else?”

 

“She has not told me she walks in other places.”

 

Adam bowed his head while biting the inside of his cheek.  He had thought Ming Ling kept a much closer eye on his wife, but knowing Shiloh, she might have told him to stop once she felt comfortable walking outside.  “Thank you, Ming Lin.  I’m going to look around outside.  Let me know if she comes in.”

 

Bowing, Ming Lin answered, “Yes, Mr. Cartwright,” before he retreated back to the kitchen.
With a determined stride, Adam stepped outside on the front porch and looked around, concentrating on the dirt track that led from their house down to the road to the main house as he went down the steps.  He’d just come up that way and knew if she’d been on that road, he’d have seen her.  Looking around in all directions, he stopped when he saw a white horse tear around the end of the stable down the hill.  He squinted, trying to see what had gotten the mare’s attention and quickly realized it was Shiloh.  Before he’d gotten ten feet, another horse slowly trotted around the end of the stable and came to a stop next to the mare.  This time, Adam noticed that Shiloh wasn’t alone.  Another man was with her.  He couldn’t tell who, but he knew it wasn’t one of the hands.

 

***

 

“I heard about this horse while I was in Placerville.  Made an offer then, but the stable master said he wasn’t his to sell.  Said I’d have to talk to you.”

 

“Elias, what made you want to buy Buster?  Surely you’ve seen similar horses.  You probably have similar horses at your livery,” said Shiloh.

 

“You’re right, Ma’am.  I do.  I don’t want Buster for the business.  I want Buster for myself.  You see, after what he did and living up in these mountains, he’s…well, he’s a good horse to have.   I’ll pay you top dollar for him,” said Elias, nervously bending the rim of his hat in his hand.

 

“I don’t understand.  What do you mean ‘after what he did’?”

 

“Elias?  What are you doing up here?”

 

Both Elias and Shiloh turned toward the newcomer.

 

Extending his hand, Elias answered, “Adam, it’s good to see you.  I came about Buster.  I tried to buy him from Buck Henry down in Placerville, but he said I’d have to speak to the missus.”

 

Adam scratched Buster’s muzzle and smiled.  “He’s not for sale, Elias.”

 

Shiloh eyed her husband severely. “Adam?”

 

“Sweetheart, this horse is worth more than all the gold in the world,” he said calmly.  “He saved my life.”

 

Her eyes questioned.

 

“He pulled me out of the debris from the avalanche and took me to Placerville.  I thought he ran away, but he came back for me after the dust settled.”

 

She stood for a moment, speechless.  When she found her voice, she said, “Elias, I’m sorry.  He’s not for sale,” then looked back at Adam.  “Why didn’t you tell me?”

 

Moving his arm around her shoulder, he slowly pulled her close.  “As I recall, I said one word, and it was left at that.  I’m sorry, Elias.  We could never sell this horse.”

 

Kicking the dirt, Elias managed a smile.  He wasn’t happy that he rode all the way out from Virginia City for nothing, and he was sure Shiloh would have sold him the horse if Adam hadn’t come along.  But they wanted to keep him for the same reason he wanted to buy him.  He couldn’t fault them for that.  “S’all right, Adam.  I understand.”

 

As Shiloh watched Elias Baldwin ride away, Adam looked around them.  “Where’s Abel?”

 

“He’s sleeping in the stable office.  Tom brought some blankets from the bunk room and made a pallet for him.”  When one of her husband’s brows shot up, she quickly added, “The window is open.  I’ll hear him if he wakes up.  Besides, I haven’t been out here long.  Elias met me on the track to the main road and walked down with me.”

 

Moving his arm back over her shoulder, he turned with her at his side and walked back toward the office.  “When were you going to tell me you’ve been taking afternoon walks?”

 

“I’ve been taking a walk for several weeks now.  You’ve been busy, and I didn’t want to disturb you or worry you.”

 

“Worry me.”  It was a statement, not a question.

 

She could tell by the tone of his voice that hadn’t settled well with him.  “Adam, I’m not going to tell you every little thing I do in the course of my day.  You’ve got too much to do as it is, and something as simple as taking a walk should not cause you concern.”

 

He stopped her just before they entered the office.  “It does concern me.  It’s easy enough to tell how exhausted you are at the end of the day…”  When she opened her mouth to speak, his brows raised as he quickly said, “And…I know a good bit of that is from pain.”

 

She huffed.  “A lot you know.”  She entered the office, and before he could ask her what she meant, she was leaning over Abel.  “Hello, my little love,” she said softly.

 

Adam looked over her shoulder, and once he saw that Abel was still sleeping, he pulled her by an arm back out of the office.  “Have you seen Paul?”

 

Crossing her arms, she looked up at the ceiling as she deeply inhaled.  “I don’t need to see Paul to know how much pain I’m in, and frankly, since you haven’t chosen to heed your own words, I don’t see that I need to give you a daily report.” She closed her eyes and clenched her jaw at the bite she had failed to keep out of her voice.  But since she had shown her hand, she went on.  “I find it quite hypocritical that you take yourself to the brink of complete exhaustion only to start again in four or five hours, and you have the audacity to bully me over taking a walk.  In case you haven’t noticed, I’m not in a whole lot of pain.”  Still with her arms crossed, she turned her side to him and gave him a rather sharp look before she looked away again.

 

He could have been angry at her accusation, but it was true.  Besides she was so…cute…when she was angry.  He fought to suppress a smile, choosing to furrow his brow and pucker his lips.  Knowing she’d feel his glare, he simply looked at her and said nothing.

 

She continued to look away, but moved her eyes to the side to see him, and when she realized he was just going to stand there and steam, or so she thought, she turned, stepping close and moving her hands up his chest.  “Oh Adam, when are you going to slow down?  You’re working yourself into an early grave, and your son isn’t even three months old.”

 

He looked up at the ceiling of the first level of the barn, taking a deep breath and maintaining his pucker, trying desperately to stall the smile begging at his lips.  Then he felt her hand move up his neck to the side of his face.  He felt her rise up on her toes against him and wondered how long he’d be able to resist.

 

“Adam, I’m fine.  I feel so much better now.  Please, I don’t want you to worry about me.  But I can’t stop worrying about you.  You look so tired.”

 

Taking her hand from his face, he kissed it and held it.  “Sweetheart, what you went through…physically and emotionally…to bring that little love into the world warrants some extended rest.”

 

“I’ve been resting.  I’m ready to get on with it.  And I intend to take some of this burden off you.  I don’t have a problem riding in the buggy, so I can go over Flying W business with Hank.  That includes payroll, supplies and whatever is needed for repairs.  Micah can help with that as well as help with the paperwork at the Ponderosa.” Before he had a chance to object, she added, “Your father has already agreed.”

 

“Sweetheart, you don’t have to do that.”

 

“Yes, I…”

 

“Hoss is back.”

 

Her mouth closed, and for a moment she just looked at him.  “Hoss and Annie are back?  Why?  What happened?”

 

“Why does something have to happen every time plans change?”  Adam asked, entering the office and taking his son in his arms.

 

“Hoss can see?” she asked, watching as Adam wrapped Abel in his baby blanket.

 

“Well, he says he’s still a little fuzzy around the edges, but he came out and helped with the branding today.  That’s why I’m home.  We’re finished with this part of the herd.  Tomorrow we’ll start on the north herd.”

 

“I need to go see Annie,” she said, following Adam out of the stable.

 

“Yes, you do,” he answered over his shoulder.  “And you’re going to tonight.  We’re going over to Pa’s for dinner.”  Adam stopped and waited for her to catch up, shifted Abel to one arm and extended his other to her.  Once she was securely holding his arm, they walked back up the hill to the house.

 

***

 

Annie heard a wagon enter the yard and rushed out the door.  She had been antsy ever since the men came home and announced there would be a family dinner this evening…the whole family.

 

Stopping the buggy in front of the barn, Adam gently nudged Shiloh and nodded toward the front porch with a stunted smile.  From the looks of her, Annie was about to explode as she rocked up and down on her toes, barely keeping her excitement at bay.

 

Adam took his time rounding the buggy to help Shiloh down with Abel, and when he glanced over at Annie, she tilted her head and gave him an angry glare to which Adam laughed out loud, causing little Abel to jerk and stiffen.

 

Looking up at his mother, Abel’s eyes seemed to say ‘How rude to wake me so jarringly!’, then he let them all know quite loudly he didn’t appreciate it.

 

Adam crooked his jaw as he glanced at Shiloh.  “Sorry.  I guess he’s not used to my laugh.”  He reached up, and taking Shiloh by the waist, gently lowered her to the ground.

 

“You may quiet him,” she said, pushing Abel into his arms.

 

He stood with his mouth twisted and his brows raised, nodding as he followed Shiloh with his eyes toward the house.  Looking down, he winked, wondering at the same time if Abel could actually see him wink yet, then began to coo and kiss him before he raised the baby to his shoulder and gently rubbed his back.  By the time Adam joined Annie and Shiloh on the porch, Abel had begun to settle down.

 

Both women stood with arms wrapped each around the other in a long, quiet embrace.  “How I’ve miss you,” said Shiloh. “But I didn’t expect you home so soon.  Did something happen?”

 

“Let’s go inside,” said Annie.  “Hoss and I can tell everyone at once about our time with Cheron’s people.”

 

Chapter Eight

 

Micah was able to join the family at the dinner table after a rather comical effort from Joe, Hoss and Adam in getting Micah into the wheelchair with his legs propped up so that his feet never touched anything.  Ben waited at the table with a dose of laudanum which Micah shrugged off.  He wanted to be able to digest everything Hoss and Annie said.

 

Annie had the most to tell, but she included Hoss in the conversation where appropriate.   She told them what she had learned from Cheron, not only about the tribe’s customs, but also about many of the plants the Washoe relied upon for food and medicine.

 

Hoss’s part of the conversation was more about attitudes than material things. “The men there are proud to a fault, and that may be their undoing.  Chu’o didn’t have much use for me, but he tolerated us bein’ there ‘cause of Cheron.  I braided a headstall and reins for him as a present for puttin’ up with us.” Taking a swallow of milk, Hoss bowed his head and added, “It was hard not to be able to help when so many little uns were dyin’.  All I could do was sit there and watch.”  He moved his hand over Annie’s.  “At least Annie was there to help.  I don’t know if Cheron could have done all that by herself.”

 

There was silence at the table as everyone bowed their heads at the thought of such a tragedy.

 

“It’s hard to believe they’d punish their women so severely,” said Shiloh quietly.

 

“That’s really why we left,” said Annie.  Neither of us thought we could watch without doing something.  But Cheron told us that would get us killed, so we left.”

 

The sound of a soft whimper floating to the table from a cradle in the living room brought their heads up. “Excuse me,” Shiloh said, pushing up from the table.

 

When the men started to rise, she motioned them all to stay seated, but Ben remained standing.   “Why don’t we have our coffee in front of the fire?  There’s a bit of chill in the air tonight.”

 

“If you don’t mind, Mr. Cartwright, I think I’ll lie down for a while,” said Micah.

 

Adam had watched the strain slowly rise on Micah’s face during the last part of the conversation.  He stood, and moving to the back of the wheelchair, pulled Micah away from the table and turned him toward the bedroom.  “Hoss, you wanna give me a hand?”

 

“Sure thing,” Hoss answered, dropping his napkin on the table and rising. “I’ll bring the laudanum.”

 

Once Micah was settled, the two men left him to rest, but as Adam pulled the door closed, Micah said, “Leave it open.  It’ll get chilly in here.  Besides, part of me might remember the rest of the conversation.”

 

Smiling, Adam winked, though he knew Micah hadn’t seen it.  His eyes were already closed. He sat on the settee rather than the blue chair, making sure there was space next to him for Shiloh to sit when she returned from feeding Abel.

 

When she brought Abel back down and passed him to his grandfather, the men were already discussing the work still needed around both ranches.

 

Moving his arm up over the back of the settee, Adam expected Shiloh to dutifully sit next to him.  He was puzzled when she chose to sit next to Annie on the hearth, and while Joe and Hoss continued the former conversation, the two women began a conversation of their own.

 

“We talked about us all through dinner,” said Annie.  “How have you been?”

 

“It was hard at first, after you left,” answered Shiloh.  She took Annie’s hand.  “But you know me.  There was no point in sitting around feeling sorry for myself.  Most of the pain is gone.  I think I’m ready to get back into it, at least some ground work with the horses.  I keep Abel with me when I play and sing.”

 

Adam stood and wandered over to the hearth.  He reached for the poker and began to slowly stoke the fire.

 

“How are you going to do that and take care of Abel, too?” continued Annie.

 

Shiloh noticed Adam suddenly stop what he was doing, if only for an instant, before he gave a log a hard shove.  Leaning in, she spoke in Annie’s ear.  “I had thought I’d find some help.”

 

“You mean a nanny?”  Annie realized she’d said that a little too loudly when Adam stood straight up and looked at them.  She leaned in closer to Shiloh and whispered, “A nanny?  Where are you going to find a nanny out here?”

 

“Well, not a nanny like you’d find in Boston.  But someone who can take care of him while I work.”  She glanced up toward Adam who, although slowly walking back to the settee, was giving her a severe look.  “I guess it will be a topic of discussion when we get home.”

 

Annie moved her eyes toward Adam and narrowed them.  “Don’t let him talk you out of it.  I think it’s a fine idea.  This way you won’t have to give up anything you wanted to do long before you were married.”

 

“I didn’t know about the horses until I came back.”

 

“Still, you were doing that work before you were married,” Annie said with a short, quick nod.

 

Shiloh’s back straightened with her resolve. “True,” she said nodding curtly and pushing her bottom lip up while looking Adam right in the eyes.

 

“Adam, we still have a lot to do because of the late start,” said Ben.  “Adam?”

 

“Huh?  Oh,” Adam said with a nervous smile.  “Sorry Pa, what were you saying?”

 

“I was saying we still have a lot to do before we can even begin to think of taking a day off.”

 

Adam nodded. “We do.  Besides finishing the roundup, we’ll have to figure out how to handle the cattle drives between three of us. One of us needs to stay back and make sure everything else is handled.  I have to go back to San Francisco in June, so I can handle the sales contract for the beef we usually deliver there.  Then besides Crocker’s timber, I’m sure we’ll get more square set orders for the mines.”

 

“Jim Tyler was asking if we could supply lumber for some of the buildings he’s putting up this spring,” offered Joe.  “It seems Virginia City is in the middle of a building boom.”

 

“Well, I’ve got to go to Carson City to meet with the other delegates to the convention in September,” said Ben, “but we should have a handle on everything by then. If we don’t, we’re in trouble for the winter.”

 

“You fellas are doing a lot of tiptoein’ around me,” said Hoss.  You just need to forget about leaving me here to take care of the house.  I’ll be the one going on some of those cattle drives, and I’ll bet you a week’s pay I’ll round up more of them strays tomorrow than the both of you,” he said, pointing to Joe and then Adam.  “I’m sick and tired of sittin’ around.”

 

Ben smiled and continued.  “Adam, we have a council meeting day after tomorrow.”

 

“Pa, aren’t we just a little premature?  We haven’t even voted on statehood.”

 

“The council doesn’t think so.  There has to be a capital when we become a state, so the decision needs to be made before the vote.”

 

Stroking his chin, Adam said quietly, “I still think it’s a long shot.”

 

“Well, besides statehood, we have city elections coming up,” said Ben, shifting in his chair and crossing his legs.  Abel woke up, but was content in trying to shove his fist in his mouth as he lay in his grandfather’s arms.

 

“I’m not running again.  I’ve got too much to do these days.”  Shaking his head, Adam added, “Virginia City needs someone whose interests lie here.  Mine are scattered.”

 

Resting her chin on her fist, Shiloh looked long and hard at Adam.  He’d said his interests are scattered.  What did that mean?

 

“Hey Adam, what about the mine?” asked Hoss.  “With Micah down, ain’t you spending any time out there?”

 

“I hired a new superintendent to handle the mine.”

 

Hoss stood up to stretch his legs and shoved his hands in his pockets.  “Well, you had a superintendent and looked what happened,” he said, nodding toward Micah’s room.

 

“Philip Deidesheimer sent him, and I trust his judgment.”  Adam shrugged.  “He’s doing all right so far.  But you’re right.  I still have to go out there on a regular basis.”

 

“Seems to me you oughta be the one staying behind,” said Hoss, looking back at his father who raised his hand to his chin and slowly nodded.  “Between the mine, the Flying W, the Ponderosa, Crocker’s timber and your archy-tecture job, I don’t see how you can handle being gone for five or six weeks on a cattle drive.”

 

“Maybe we should start thinking seriously about hiring a foreman,” said Adam with an almost apologetic wince.

 

“Adam,” started Ben.  “It’s true, this year has already been busier than most.  We’ve had some injuries that slowed us down.  But that doesn’t mean we can’t handle the work, and it doesn’t mean next year will be the same.  I think we need to wait and see how this turns out before we bring in an outsider to handle our business.”

 

“Pa, he doesn’t have to handle our business.  It’ll take a lot off of us just to have someone help coordinate the work.  We still have to hire more hands for the ranch work besides the lumber camps.  When will we have time to do that?”

 

“Micah and I can do that,” said Shiloh.

 

Everyone looked at her, but no one was smiling.

 

“Don’t look at me like I don’t know what I’m talking about.  Micah and I both have some experience at hiring…Adam, before we were married, I hired hands for the Flying W.  I hired Johnny and Tom both for the horses.”

 

“Do you really want to bring up how Tom was hired?,” Adam replied with raised brows.  When her lower jaw dropped, he closed his eyes and exhaled. “Shiloh, you hire men based on the facts of what they can do, not how much they need the job.”  Grimacing, he knew that had come out too sharp, but Shiloh had already folded her lips and bowed her head. “Sweetheart, I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to snap at you.  But you tend to lead with your heart.”

 

Hoss glanced over at Annie and raised his brow.  Still with his hands in his pockets, he kicked at the imaginary dust on the floor.  “I reckon we’ve all brought home our share of strays, don’t you, Adam?”

 

Standing, Adam crossed the room and asked for Shiloh’s hand, and when she placed her hand in his, he pulled her up off the hearth, met her eyes and smiled, receiving a rather coy smile back.  “I suppose so,” he replied, kissing her hand.  “It’s time for us to go home.  I still have some work to do, and it’s way past Abel’s bed time.”

 

“Bed time?  How can you have a bed time when you sleep all the time anyway?” asked Joe, chuckling.

 

“Adam’s right, Joe,” answered Shiloh.  “I’m trying to keep him on a schedule so I can get some sleep at night.  As soon as that’s done, I’ll start working with the horses.”  When Adam’s chin slightly rose, she added, “A little at first, just to get them used to me, and then maybe a reminder of their ground manners.”  She gave Adam a sideways nod.  “I’ll see Paul again before I try riding.”

 

“Well,” said Adam, rubbing his hands together and walking toward his father.  “Let’s get this little fella wrapped up.”

 

Shiloh stuck her head in Micah’s bedroom door on the way out, but he was deep in his laudanum induced sleep. She quietly went to the side of the bed, and moving a hand to his forehead, she leaned over and kissed him goodnight.

 

Everyone stood on the porch as Adam helped Shiloh into the buggy, then went back to Annie for the baby.  “You know you can come out and visit.  Hoss tells me you’re not going to start practicing medicine for a little while,” said Adam.

 

“I may just do that,” she said, as she kissed Abel’s head.

 

After passing the baby up to his mother, Adam climbed up into the buggy next to her, waved, and drove away toward home.

 

Chapter Nine

 

Not a word was said in the buggy on the way home, nor was there any conversation on the way up the stairs as both parents went up to put Abel down.  Shiloh quietly changed him, the only indication of disturbance she received was a long stretch and a yawn after which he kicked himself over on his side and assumed his familiar fetal position.

 

Adam quietly chuckled as he leaned against the doorframe of the nursery and watched as Shiloh tenderly tucked the child in.  “With a mouth so small when he yawns, it’s quite amazing the level of sound he can produce when he wants something.”  He naturally moved his arm around her shoulders when she stepped into his side.

 

“Do you think we’re spoiling him, getting up and tending to him every time he cries?” she asked, glancing up at him, then looking back at the peaceful baby.

 

“Maybe that’ll be true when he’s older.  But right now, I think he’s just reacting to what his little body tells him.”  He puckered his lips with an amused glimmer in his eyes.  “Then again, Hoss still whines like a baby when he’s hungry, doesn’t he?”

 

She tilted her head back and laughed softly.  “Oh, I don’t think that would happen under dire circumstances.”

 

“I don’t know.  I remember a time when all three of us were pinned down in some rocks and all Hoss could think about was food.  Said he could smell Hop Sing’s cooking even though we were miles from home.”

 

Turning his laughing wife toward the stairs, he pushed the nursery door all the way open before they walked, each with an arm around the waist of the other, down the stairs to the study.  He poured two cordials of brandy as she seated herself in the chair in front of the desk.

 

“Why don’t you sit in the desk chair?” he asked as he passed her one of the glasses.  “I’ll be working at the drawing desk, and that chair is more comfortable.”  Tilting his head, he said, “On second thought, come ‘ere.”  Taking her hand he pulled her up out of the chair and guided her to the other side of the desk where he sat down and then invited her to sit on his lap.

 

“Have I been bad?” she asked, then took a sip of brandy.

 

“What makes you think that?”

 

“There was steam rising from your collar when you walked away from the hearth at Pa’s…just after I had mentioned getting help to Annie.”  She touched a finger to his nose.  “Isn’t that why I’m sitting on your lap?”

 

He set his glass on the desk and twirled it for a moment.  “I realize at some point, you will need help if you’re going to start training horses and singing again.  But isn’t it too soon?  He’s only three months old.  He’s barely on a schedule, and you’re still feeding him every three or four hours.”  He looked into her eyes expecting to see fight there, but she seemed completely calm.

 

After placing her glass beside his, she wrapped her arms around his neck and bent to kiss him, a kiss he extended by moving his hand to the back of her neck.  Looking deeply into his eyes, she asked, “Mr. Cartwright, when do you intend to attend to your wife?”

 

His nostrils flared as his eyes took in the glossiness of her freshly kissed lips.  “I will attend to my wife when the good doctor says it’s all right for me to do so.”  Kissing her nose, he continued, “And not before.”  Though she tried to continue to appear relaxed, he felt the slightest stiffening in her posture.

 

“And what if Annie says I’m all right?”

 

Pulling a hand away from her back, he stroked his forehead, then gave her a resolute gaze.

 

“Adam, do you remember the day Annie and Cheron tried to get me out of bed the first time.”  Upon seeing his creased brows, she said, “Oh.  Of course you don’t.  You weren’t here.  Well, they talked about me for a few minutes before Annie left to get Paul…against my rather loud objections.”  She bent to see his eyes.  “She’s not going to tell me anything she’s uncomfortable with.  And she is my doctor now.  Not Paul.”

 

He narrowed his eyes.  “I’ll sleep on it.”

 

Taking a deep breath, she managed a smile.  After all, matters of attendance were completely in his hands.  If he insisted that Paul pronounce her well, that would be all she would be able to do to garner his attentions again.

 

He waited for the objection that didn’t come, and nodded when he realized that particular part of the discussion was over.  “Now, let’s talk about help, shall we?”

 

“I believe it would be best to hire help now before we have to really rely on someone to take care of Abel the way we’d want him to be taken care of.  She’ll have to learn the schedules, the household routines, she’ll have to deal with the chaos that comes with working for a Cartwright, and she’ll have to get to know Ming Lin as she’ll have duties in the kitchen.”

 

He looked away for a moment, thinking.  He could find no flaw in her reasoning, and quite frankly didn’t really expect to.  She generally thought things through.

 

He rose from the chair, lifting her to her feet as he went and walked her to the door of the study.  “I’ll make some inquiries tomorrow.  We’ll interview some people before we make a decision.”

 

With a relieved smile, she said, “Thank you.”

 

“Now, why don’t you go on up and get ready for bed?” he said, moving a hand to the side of her face.
“I would prefer to wait for you.”

 

Moving with her toward the stairs, he answered, “I know you would.  But you look tired.  That walk down to the main road, and then down to the stables and back up is probably the farthest you’ve walked since you started, isn’t it?”  Halting at the stairs, he took her hand and sent her up a step, so that they were at almost equal height, then wrapped his arms around her.

 

“But you come up so late, I’m already asleep by the time you get there.” She tugged at the points of his collar.  “I used to fall asleep in your arms.”

 

“And you will soon.  But for now, we all have to do what’s necessary to get things done, and your responsibility is here with Abel.”

 

“I won’t put up a fuss if you promise to hold me when you come to bed.”

 

Taking her hands, he kissed her knuckles.  “I don’t want to wake you.”

 

“Even if you do,” she said, leaning into him, “I won’t be awake for long.  I sleep better when I feel you there.”

 

“Mm hm.” He couldn’t help but smile, and when she saw his dimples, she kissed them, making him laugh.  “All right, all right!”  Turning her around, he said, “Go on up.  I won’t be long.”

 

All the while Shiloh got ready for bed, she had a smile on her face.  She knew Adam wasn’t one to go back on his word, and she looked forward to feeling his hands pull her into him the way he used to before her stomach had begun to come between them.  After she fed Abel and kissed him goodnight one more time, she crawled under the covers and fell asleep with a smile on her face.

 

It was three in the morning before Adam tiptoed into the bedroom.  First, he went into the nursery to check on Abel, taking a few minutes to tickle his cheek and watch Abel pucker his lips and slightly wiggle.  Before he left, he made sure the baby was still sound asleep.

 

Standing by the bed, looking at Shiloh curled up into a ball facing away from him, he knew by the rhythm of her breathing she’d been sleeping for awhile.  With his shirt unbuttoned, he let it fall down his arms to his waiting hands, then tossed it over the belt on the chair.  Raising one leg, then the other, he pulled his boots off and quietly lowered them to the floor next to the bed.  Next, he blew out the lamp burning low on his side of the bed, then slipped his trousers off, carefully laying them in the chair so the contents of his pockets wouldn’t spill out.  He waited until he was ready to get in bed to let his drawers drop to the floor, stepping on the legs and extricating his feet.  He crawled across the bed on his hands and knees, wearing an expectant smile, and lay down in the middle of the mattress, then reached out, wrapping his long fingers around her waist and pulling her into him.

 

She moaned softly, but never opened her eyes, and when she settled into him, she had a smile on her face.  There they lay in each other’s arms until they were awakened just before five o’clock by a hungry little man.

 

***

 

The next few weeks had been just as hectic as the beginning of spring.  A band had broken at the sawmill and would take three weeks to replace, and that was three weeks too long.  They’d be so far behind on the timber contracts, they wouldn’t be able to recover.  Since the sawmill wasn’t running, Adam handled the order and payment by wire and sent Shorty to pick up the band in Stockton. Now with the new band installed, the sawmill ran day and night with an extra crew in order to make  up the lost time.  But with the extra crew working to take down trees, haul them to the sawmill and mill them, no one was left to plant new trees in their place.

 

“Adam, I don’t like it,” barked Ben, his brows creased in anger.  “If you keep cutting without planting, at this rate we’ll be out of decent lumber in a few years.”

 

Rolling his eyes, Adam, who wasn’t in the best of moods, answered, “Pa, we’ll plant trees after the lumber is delivered.”

 

Ben’s hands moved to his hips as he leaned toward his son. “By that time, there’ll be snow on the ground, too late to plant trees.”

 

“What would you have me do?” Adam shouted.  “I’ve hired every available man within two hundred miles willing to work to cover cutting, cattle drives and repairs.  And that still doesn’t get the lumber delivered.”

 

Ben huffed and turned his side to Adam. “We shouldn’t have taken the railroad contracts.  We knew they were big.”

 

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Adam turned his back to his father.  “It’s not the railroad contracts.  It’s Micah…and Hoss to some extent.  We’re late getting started, we’re were down two, and the winter was particularly hard.  The real problem is there’s not enough of us to make sure things get done on time and done the right way.”

 

“Hmf,” said Ben.  “So what can we do?”

 

Shiloh had been listening at the top of the stairs and waited for her husband and father-in-law to leave the house before she bundled up Abel and went to the kitchen where she asked Ming Lin to help her hitch the buggy.

 

Ming Lin drove her to the Flying W where Hank was handing out the work for day.  “Hank, how are you?”

 

“Miss Shiloh, this is a nice surprise,” he said, pulling down the corner of the blanket covering Abel’s face.  “Well, he’s definitely a Cartwright, ain’t he?  He looks a lot like his Pa.”

 

Shiloh watched him with narrowed eyes.  “Uh huh.  And how are you?”

 

“We’re doing all right, I guess,” he said, looking away.

 

“I know that look, Hank.  Out with it.”

 

“Mr. Adam’s got some of the men helping with the repairs over at the Ponderosa since some of Mr. Ben’s hands are up at the lumber camp.  That means some of our repairs ain’t gettin’ done.”

 

“How much isn’t getting done?  Surely he’s left enough men to do the worst of it.”

 

“He has, and he’s doing the same thing at the Ponderosa.”

 

“And what about the herd?”

 

“Well, we can’t really spare many men off the herd with some off with Joe on the drive to Sonora.”

 

“Hank, what would happen if you combined herds.  Move our north herd in with the Ponderosa’s north herd, and our south with their south.  Would that free up more men?”

 

“Well yeah.  Each crew would only need a few more hands to handle the larger herd.  An extra to bring in strays and an extra for rotation overnight.”

 

“How many extra would that leave us?”

 

Hank tilted his head and narrowed his eyes.  “Eight more.  But don’t you wanna ask Mr. Cartwright before we go moving our cattle onto the Ponderosa.  He’s mighty strict about keeping these two ranches separate.”

 

She smiled. “I know, Hank.  I just wanted to make sure it was possible before I troubled him with it.  He and Adam have enough on their hands than to waste time with an idea that won’t work.  If he does agree to do it, you can send Johnny with them.  Tom can handle the horses for the time being.  That’s nine more men at the timber camps.”

 

“What do you want me to do?” asked Hank.

 

“Just start thinking about who we have that can cut lumber.  Or maybe the Ponderosa has more men who can cut lumber.  I know Adam likes to keep some of them over the winter so they can get an early start, but I imagine everyone who has experience is already up at the camps.  I’m going to talk to Micah.  If I can convince him, he can help convince Pa.”

 

“And what about Mr. Adam?”

 

She nodded to Ming Lin, who lifted the reins, causing the horses to lift their heads.  “I’ll talk to Adam.  I don’t see him turning down the help.”   Turning the buggy around in the Flying W yard, she said as they drove out, “I’ll let you know.”

 

Chapter Ten

 

Ming Lin next drove Shiloh to the main house.  While she visited with her brother, he went to the kitchen to see Hop Sing.

 

Both men bowed and spoke in Cantonese.  “You are well?” asked Hop Sing.

 

“Yes, Cousin, and you?” replied Ming Lin.

 

Hop Sing nodded, then turned his attention to the vegetables on his work table.

 

Ming Lin followed and absent-mindedly picked up a knife and began to peel potatoes. “What troubles you, Cousin?”

 

“I am not troubled.  Spring is a busy time, but this year, the Cartwrights are louder.  They yell all the time because there is not enough men to do the work.”

 

“Mrs. Cartwright may have a way for them to have more workers, if Mr. Cartwright will listen to her.  That is why we are here.  She is speaking with Mr. Micah.”

 

“It would be nice to bring some peacefulness back to life,” said Hop Sing.  Both men nodded and quietly peeled potatoes.

 

***

 

After settling Abel in Micah’s arms, Shiloh sat quietly in the chair next to the bed.

 

Micah waited for a time, but curiosity got the best of him.  “Whatever’s bothering you, just say it, Shy.  There’s no good or bad time while I’m conscious.”

 

She smiled.  “I need your help.”

 

“You wouldn’t be here in the middle of the day if you didn’t,” said Micah, winking, and then turning his attention toward his nephew who had just stretched and yawned.

 

Abel’s eyes were open, and the child was looking up at Micah’s face, seemingly deciding whether or not he was happy with his current accommodations.  The baby stiffened and cooed, settling down in Micah’s arms, content to watch the world for a little while.

 

“Micah, I don’t know how much you’ve been hearing, but things are starting to fall behind.  Actually, they’re not just starting.  They’re already behind.”

 

“I have heard enough to know that.  But I don’t see any way to avoid it, Shy.  Mr. Cartwright said Adam’s already hired everyone who wants to work.”

 

“That’s true, but I have an idea that would give him nine more men.”  She sat forward on her chair.  “I know Pa didn’t want to let the herds run together for legal reasons, but I think the problems we’re having right now might just warrant a little risk, at least risk as far as he’s concerned.”

 

Recognizing the determined light in Shiloh’s eyes, he knew she’d worked through this in her mind every way possible, and had already come to the conclusion that it was worth doing, and, if left up to her, would be done. But this wasn’t her decision.  She was looking for an ally.  He stifled a smile.  “Go on.  I’m listening.”

 

“If we combine the north and south Ponderosa herds with the north and south herds from the Flying W, Hank says that will free up eight more men.  And I can add Johnny to that, so that will give Adam nine more men.”

 

Micah bit his lip, remembering everything that had been discussed the last few days.  “Nine more men could make the difference in making the deadlines on those timber contracts.  We’d need another team of horses.”

 

“They already have all the Clydesdales, but I could give them Buster and Blue.  They might not be as fast as the Clydesdales, but they’re big enough to pull logs.  We don’t have another set of harnesses, but I have to go into town today.  I can find out if Mr. Baldwin at the livery might have a set of harnesses, and if not, I can order a set from Miller’s forge.”

 

Micah looked down at his nephew who was concentrating on untangling his little fingers.  Taking a deep breath, he creased his brows, cocked his head first to one side, then to the other as if weighing the good and bad of Shiloh’s suggestion.  “What do you want me to do?”

 

“Talk to Pa.  Just lay it all out for him, and convince him it needs to be done.”

 

“I’m sure you realize what a sizable task that’s going to be, even if he stops to listen to it.  The minute I say the words ‘combine herds’ he’s liable to walk away.”

 

She sat on the very edge of her seat, pleading with her eyes. “Then you have to make sure he doesn’t walk away.”

 

Laughing, Micah looked up at the ceiling.  “I can’t exactly run after him.”

 

She wilted, casting her eyes down. “I’m…I’m sorry, Micah.  I didn’t mean to…”

 

“Stop,” he said, waving his hand.  “You didn’t.  I’ll figure out something.”

 

Glancing back up at him, she smiled.  “Thank you.  I’ll get the harnesses as soon as I can.”

 

She stood to take Abel, and while she was wrapping him in his blanket, Micah asked, “What about Adam?”

 

Taking the child into her arms, and swaying back and forth,” she said, “I’ll talk to Adam tonight.  I don’t think he’ll have a problem combining the herds.  After all, he owns a piece of both of them.  I think he’ll be glad for the help.”  She leaned over the bed and kissed his forehead.  “I didn’t ask how you’re feeling.  Is there still a lot of pain?”

 

He shrugged.  “It’s nothing for you to worry about.  You know the road is gonna be long for me.  I just take it a day at a time.”

 

“Do you have something to keep you busy, at least?” she asked, brushing his hair behind his ear.

 

Flipping the hair from behind his ear, he said, “I hate that.  I have enough to do, thank you.  Mr. Cartwright’s letting me do the ledger, and Adam brings over the books from the mine.  The rest of the time, I don’t generally know my name.”  He raised a brow, snorted and looked away.

 

She slowly sat down and found his hand.  “What can I do for you?”

 

“Shy,” he whispered, bowing his head.  “Can you get me out of here?  I mean, outside, out of the house.  Can you get me home?”

 

“When’s the last time you saw Dr. Martin?”

 

“Just a few days ago.”  He nodded toward his feet.  “He says they’re still too raw.  He doesn’t want to take the chance of infection because it could destroy the skin that’s…”  he let his head drop again.  “Left.”

 

“Micah, the best I can do is take you home with me.  And that might take some time.  There’s a room downstairs, but it’s not finished.”

 

“It’s got four walls, doesn’t it?”

 

She chuckled.  “Yes, but that’s about it.  Besides, it won’t necessarily get you outside.  We have a porch that’s at least five steps high.  It’s a lot easier to roll out on this one and you can go further.”  Her offering didn’t bring him out of his depression.  “Hey, I’ll talk to Hop Sing…show him how to prop your legs up so your feet don’t touch.  Then you can roll around inside and out all you want.”  She noticed the lines forming on his forehead.  “It’s time, isn’t it?  Do you need help?”

 

“No,” he said, smiling.  “I can do it.  But I want you to go before I take it.”

 

She started to smile, but didn’t quite make it, barely avoiding tears begging to escape.  “All right.  I’ll see you in a few days.  When I come back, I’ll show Hop Sing how to keep your feet up in the chair.”  Standing and leaning in again, she pressed her cheek to the top of his head, gave him a quick kiss, and left.

 

The last thing Micah heard before he succumbed to the laudanum was the buggy leaving the yard.

 

***

 

Adam and his father walked through the front door, removing their guns and hats, and then continuing to the living room.  Adam poured both men a drink.  “Good thing we went by the main house first.  If I had come home and Shiloh and Ming Lin were both gone, I think I might have been just a little disturbed.”

 

Ben noticed the edge in his son’s voice. “Now Adam, surely you don’t expect her to give you a detailed itinerary whenever she needs to go to town.  She’s a big girl.”

 

Adam had just gotten his glass to his lips and hesitated.  “She is.  But she has a small baby with her.  She should have let me know.”  He finished his sip of whiskey and drew in a slow breath to cool the burn.  “And it’s almost dark, and she’s not back.”  He seated himself heavily on the sofa.

 

“Well, we know what she’s up to.  From what Micah said, she’s already making arrangements for another set of harnesses,” said Ben.

 

“You have to admit, Pa, it’s a good idea.”

 

“No, I don’t,” answered Ben, crossing his legs.  “I’ll not risk the Flying W by getting it tangled up with the Ponderosa.

 

Just then, Shiloh and Ming Lin came through the front door.  Shiloh froze when she heard voices in the living room.

 

Ming Lin took the package she carried, and excused himself at the same time Adam appeared next to her.

 

“Thank you, Ming Lin,” she said, and then turned to her husband, who took the baby from her.

 

“Pa’s here,” he said, walking back into the living area and laying Abel down in the cradle there.

 

She followed, clasping her hands in front of her when she entered the sitting area.  “Hello, Pa.  I didn’t expect you.  Have you had dinner?”

 

“No, but Hop Sing is expecting me back.”  He stood.  “I just wanted to tell you that Micah spoke to both of us…and the answer is no.”

 

She had done a lot of thinking while riding as a passenger in the buggy Ming Lin was driving to and from Virginia City.  Knowing what the answer was going to be, she had come up with her own argument.

 

“Fine.  Since you feel that way, then I’m afraid we need to move all the timber camps cutting wood for the Crocker contracts to Flying W land.  You see, I won the Crocker contracts for the Flying W before I married into the Cartwright family.  And since you don’t want to mix business between the two ranches, it’s only right that those camps be moved, and we deal with the problems they’re causing.  That way, the Ponderosa won’t be involved when the contracted dates are missed.”

 

Adam scratched his head and then rubbed his temples.  “Shiloh…”

 

Ben held his hand up calmly and gave Adam a glance that stopped him.  “Let’s…let’s hear what she has to say.  She’s obviously given this some thought.”

 

She had been standing there very stoically, but softened as she walked to her father-in-law, taking his hands and looking up into his eyes.  “Pa, I thought you considered Micah and me part of the family.”

 

He smiled.  “I do.”

 

“Micah and I are willing to take the risk, and the risk is ours to take.  It’s a good risk.  If something comes along and we lose everything, we lose everything together.  We start over together as a family should.”

 

Ben’s brow creased as he thought.  She was right.  The Ponderosa was always at risk.  And though it was his intention to leave the ranch to his sons, he was willing, at times, to put it all at risk when the risk was worth taking.  He did considered Micah and Shiloh part of his family, another son and daughter. “Nine men?”

 

She smiled.  “Nine men.”

 

“Team?”

 

Chuckling, Shiloh tiptoed and kissed Ben’s cheek.  “Buster and Blue.  And Mr. Baldwin is delivering a set of harnesses tomorrow.”

 

Ben squeezed her hands and kissed her forehead.  “Good night.  Adam, will I see you tomorrow?” he asked as he headed for the door, taking his hat and gun belt off the entry table.

 

“Sounds like I’m delivering a team and some extra men to the timber camp tomorrow. So probably not.”  He stepped up to Shiloh, moving a hand to her shoulder, and as soon as the door closed behind his father, he spun her around.  “Don’t do that again.”

 

“What?”

 

Adam pinched the bridge of his nose.  “Why didn’t you tell me what you were going to do?   And why didn’t you tell me you were going to town?”

 

She cut her eyes up and away and took a deep breath before she answered.  “Because you weren’t here when I decided to do it.”  She took a step back away from him.  “In fact, you’re rarely here when I’m awake.  I was just trying to help,” she finished, backing away toward Abel and lifting him out of the cradle.  “I’ll go see about dinner.”

 

“Shiloh,” Adam said, stepping in front of her as she retreated. “Shiloh.”  Moving his hand across her shoulder to the side of her neck, he said, “You didn’t go to town for harnesses.”

 

“No, I didn’t even think about the harnesses until after I spoke to Micah.  I went…”  she glanced up at him.  “…to see Paul.”

 

He pulled her into him. “And what did Paul say?”

 

“He said I’m fine.  That I should still take some time to test what I can do.  Go slow.”

 

“Test?”

 

“You know.  Like maybe sitting on a horse to see how it feels and get used to that before I go for a ride.”

 

“Uh huh.”

 

She stepped closer, holding Abel to one side.  “He said I’m fine,” she whispered.

 

“You see, that’s something I would have liked to hear for myself.”

 

She gave him an angry scowl.  “You think I’m lying?”

 

“No.  Not exactly.”

 

Huffing, she pushed away.  “Not exactly?”

 

“I just think that…sometimes…you leave out important details…when it suits your purpose.”

 

“I haven’t lied to you.   But since you think I have, whether by an outright lie or a lie of omission, why don’t we just drop it until you find the time to ride into town to talk to Dr. Martin for yourself.”  She turned and started to walk away, but stopped and looked back over her shoulder.  “I’ll say good night now.  I’ll arrange for your dinner before I go upstairs for the evening.”

 

Adam stood with his hands on his hips, the muscles of his jaw flexing as he watched her go.  But he let her go without saying anything else.  Once she was out of sight, he turned back to the living area and poured himself another whiskey, drinking it slowly while staring into the embers glowing in the fireplace.

 

Shaking his head, he asked himself what he had expected after telling her he didn’t trust her to tell him the truth when it came to her health.  He could have said that a little better.  It probably wouldn’t have mattered anyway.  With any question he’d posed, any comment he’d made, it would have turned sour.  They were both on edge, Shiloh because of her confinement and her inability to get back to work.  She was never very good at having time on her hands to do nothing.  And he was more on edge than ever after the morning’s conversation with his father about the Crocker contracts, after his father questioned his judgment.  Maybe after the work was caught up and running smoothly…maybe it was time to start thinking about making a change.  He wasn’t about to tell anyone his true feelings about his work with Slater, nor was he going to tell anyone that he was beginning to feel that work was more important.  He’d worked it all out over and over in his head.  Joe, Hoss and Pa could handle the Ponderosa.  Micah could run the Flying W with Hank as foreman, even from a wheelchair.  Shiloh could still have her horse business and her music in San Francisco.  And that would put him where he wanted to be, doing what he wanted to do.

 

He bent and began to rebuild the fire that would keep the house warm during the chilly night.  He couldn’t tell anyone.  He couldn’t even begin to think about leaving until things were right at both ranches.  And getting them there could cause clashes and conflicts all the way around if he wasn’t careful.

 

As he was thinking while staring at the new flames lapping at the logs, Shiloh had come back out of the kitchen and quietly ascended the stairs with Abel.  She turned around once at the top and thought to say good night one more time, but decided against it.  He’d insinuated she had lied.  She didn’t feel very charitable at the moment.

 

Chapter Eleven
Adam picked at his dinner, then went to his office where he worked on the drawings for the Hotaling Building.  Everything had to be ready by the middle of May so he could send the drawings to Robert to check before the two men presented them to Mr. Hotaling in June along with several other architects vying for the contract.   He had also been requested to come up with drawings for a state capitol building, the likes of which no one had ever seen, by the city council of Virginia City.  Based on the agreement he had with Robert, the work was performed under the Slater and Cartwright name and payment was sent directly to Robert.  Because every other architectural firm in Virginia City, all two of them, had backed out when they found Adam would be representing his San Francisco firm, Adam had to recuse himself from all council votes dealing with statehood, and he was fine with that.  He felt the effort to make Virginia City the capital of the State of Nevada was a time-wasting exercise, and he did not have time to waste.

 

When he heard Abel crying, he had just finished an elevation drawing of his state capitol building.  He smiled as he listened to Shiloh shushing the baby, talking to him as she settled him down for a meal.  Pushing away from the desk, he decided he’d done enough for the night.  This would be one of the very few nights when he’d see Abel awake before he slipped into bed beside his wife.

 

After blowing the lamps out in the study, he walked around the downstairs turning down or blowing out the rest of the lamps.  He stoked the fire, adding more logs, and then quietly climbed the stairs, not stopping until he was leaning against the doorframe of the nursery with his arms crossed, watching as Shiloh smiled down at her son, whispering to him as he nursed.

 

Abel’s eyes were wide open as he watched his mother’s face, reaching up to touch her, but not quite making it.  His little legs would start to kick as his face turned red with frustration, and every now and then he’d almost cry, but when he realized he couldn’t nurse and cry, he’d settle back down.

 

Adam wondered when Abel had begun to see his mother.  With his smile disappearing, he bowed his head, wondering what else he’d missed.   As he drew closer, Shiloh caught the movement and looked up.  Her smile left her, and without saying anything, she turned her attention back to the baby.

 

Moving his elbow to the top of a chest-of-drawers, Adam propped his head on his hand.  “Would you tell me what else Paul said?”

 

She glanced up at him only for a moment.  “Other than what I’ve already told you, he didn’t say much.  He did an examination and said everything had healed well, and asked if my hips were still bothering me.  I told him there was still some soreness, and that I hurt more in the evening, but that I’ve been walking.  I told him I try to do as much as I can on my feet, but I don’t really have that much to do yet.”

 

“Did he say anything about…us?”

 

Trying her best to hide a smile, she answered, “I don’t know what you mean,” and gave him her most earnestly confused look.

 

She wasn’t quite successful at hiding the slight upturn at the corner of her mouth or the impish sparkle in her eyes, because he stepped forward and grasped her chin, turning her face up to his.  He gave her a stern look for teasing him, then gave her a long, deep kiss that warmed her blood so, he could feel the heat rising from the bare skin of her shoulders.

 

When he finished his kiss, she immediately looked away.  Considering he hadn’t shown any interest before, she hadn’t expected it now.

 

“Sweetheart, what is it?”

 

She hesitated, tilting her head. “It’s hard not to feel uncomfortable when you’ve felt…undesirable…for so long.”

 

Adam’s mouth fell open as his brows creased.  It seemed his mouth froze at the beginning of the word ‘what’ for a moment before he actually said something.  “Why do you feel that way?”

 

Abel had fallen asleep, so she stood and lay him in his crib, wiping his mouth with a piece of flannel, then pulling her robe around her and clutching it closed before she turned back to face Adam.  All she could manage was a sheepish look before she stepped around him and hurried into the bedroom.

 

He was right behind her, and when they were far enough away from the nursery so as not to disturb Abel, he took her arms and stopped her from going any further.  “Shiloh, why?” he said softly, waiting patiently while she gathered her thoughts.

 

“I…” she started, but closed her mouth again.  Closing her eyes, she tilted her head back, and reopened them to look up at the ceiling.  “You haven’t shown much interest in me since Abel’s birth.  I thought maybe I wasn’t…I mean, I’m wearing the same clothes…mostly.  They just fit a little differently.”

 

Taking a deep breath, he allowed his cheeks to bubble as he blew out.  “Shiloh, I couldn’t afford to show that kind of interest in you.  You had just had a baby, and it was a difficult birth.  If I had allowed anything to start…” he looked sideways at her.  “You needed time to heal, and I didn’t want to do something that might make it worse.”  He turned her so that she had to look at him.  “It’s not that I don’t want you.  I do.  I knew I had to…leave you alone…to give you time to heal.”

 

She gave him a straight, though fretful look.  “I don’t look the same.”

 

He chuckled.  “It’s not as if I haven’t noticed you. There are some small differences.  You’re bigger…here,” he said, nodding at her chest, and maybe have a little more curve here,” he said, moving his hands to her hips and pulling her into him.  The corner of his mouth turned up as his nostrils flared and his eyes gleamed.  “If I had to use one word to describe you, I’d say you’re…”  He lowered his face and looked up from under his brows.  “Voluptuous,” he finished in a husky voice.

 

Her blush got the best of her and she began to shrink away, but he held her against him.  “So Paul said it was all right.   And how do you feel about it?”

 

Her discomfiture was such that she couldn’t keep her eyes open.  “It almost feels like our wedding night again.  With all the problems and changes, I don’t know what to expect.”

 

“And do you remember what I told you on our wedding night?” he asked softly while lightly kissing the side of her face and her ear.  “I don’t want you to be afraid of me.”   He slipped her robe off her shoulders and enveloped her, covering her mouth with his whenever she began to speak.  When her breaths came faster, and her fingers began to unbutton his shirt and move lightly over his chest, he backed her up to the side of the bed, and fell with her, catching himself with his hand on the mattress before he landed on her.  “I’ll be right back.  Don’t go anywhere.”

 

As she watched him disrobe, she moved over to her side of the bed and pulled the covers over her.

 

Just as he winked at her, there was a knock at the door.  He stopped, his eyes wide as he crooked his jaw.  “What is it?”

 

“Mr. Cartwright,” said Ming Lin, “a man called Digger is here from the mine.  He says there has been an explosion and fire.”

 

Adam’s brow furrowed as he hurriedly redressed while Shiloh sat up in the bed and pulled the cover up.  “I’m sorry, Sweetheart.  I have to go.”   He sat on the bed next to her and pulled his boots on, then leaned into her for a kiss.  With his forehead against hers, he whispered, “I’m sorry.”

 

She smiled and kissed his nose.  “It’s all right.  I’ll be right here when you get back.  Unless Abel calls.  Then we’ll both be here waiting.”

 

Standing, he bent and kissed her one more time.

 

As he opened the door, she called to him. “Adam?”

 

He looked back.  “Yeah?”

 

“Come back to me.”

 

“Always,” he said, smiling before he pulled the door closed behind him.

 

Digger was waiting at the bottom of the stairs, wringing his hat in his hands.  Before Adam took the first step down, he was already speaking.  “Mr. Cartwright, Mr. Cooper sent me.  The powder shack at the mine’s exploded.”

 

Adam stopped halfway down the stairs.  “Anyone hurt?”

 

“Don’t know yet.  When I was leavin’, they was still lookin’ for everyone.”

 

Continuing down the stairs, Adam went straight to the entry table and began to fasten his gun belt.  “Do we know what caused the explosion?”

 

“No sir.  Mr. Cooper sent me real quick.  All I know is it was big.  My ears is still ringin’, and I wadn’t real close.”

 

“What about fire?”

 

“Yessir.  The trees behind the shack caught fire.   Don’t know how bad, though.”

 

On the way out the door, Adam gave Digger instructions.  “Go to the bunkhouse at the Flying W.  Tell the men to come out to the mine ready to fight a fire.  Send one out to Hank’s to let him know where everyone is.”

 

Hesitating at the door of the barn, Adam moved his hands to his hips, bowed his head and bit his bottom lip.  There was a lot of black powder in that shack.  An explosion would have sent flames high up, possibly into the crowns of some of those trees, and if that happened, it would spread fast.  At first he dismissed the idea of bringing the men over from the Ponderosa.  After all, the mine belonged solely to the Flying W.  But in all good conscience, he couldn’t wait to find out how bad it was for himself.  A fire could well be on its way southwest toward the lake, and that part of the Ponderosa was heavily treed.

 

“Digger, after you go by the Flying W, go to the main house and let my father know.  Tell him I said this fire could spread fast.”

 

Digger mounted and left, and Adam wasn’t far behind him, riding hard all the way to the mine.  Still several miles away, he saw a dome of orange low in the sky, and kept himself low in the saddle, letting Sport run.

 

When he arrived, he saw chaos all around him, miners running to and fro with buckets, some with burlap.  The few with shovels and hatchets were working at the front of the fire rather than behind it to clear a break.

 

Adam realized the miners weren’t going to make a difference and headed east to the closest timber camp.  The men there would have some experience felling trees to clear a break.

 

Shorty had seen the orange sky from the higher elevation of the timber camp, and he and a contingent of men along with a wagon of tools met Adam halfway.   By the time they arrived back at the mine, the miners had run out of water, and the fire had doubled in size.

 

Adam sent the lumberjacks forward a half mile to start cutting a break and moving toward the fire.   He had the miners stay in front of the fire to prevent it from moving any closer to the other mine buildings.  Luckily, the area around the shaft had been cleared of trees, so they were fighting mostly small spark-ignited fires around the mine.

 

By that time, Ben arrived with Hoss and Joe and all the men from the Ponderosa bunkhouse along with tools to fight the fire.

 

“Adam!  Where do you need us?” yelled Ben.

 

“I’ve got lumberjacks west.  We need men to the south to cut another break.”

 

Ben turned.  “Joe, take the men south and start a break.  Hoss, can you see well enough to ride out to the timber camp up on Mt. Rose?”

 

“Yessir.  I’ll bring down every man there.”   Ben watched as Hoss rode away until the darkness overtook the eerie glow at his back.  Turning, Ben moved an arm around Adam’s shoulder and turned away from the roar of the fire.  Still, he had to yell to be heard.  “What happened?”

 

“All I know is the powder shack exploded!”

 

There was no time to say more because Digger rode in with the men from the Flying W.  Adam grabbed the bridle of Digger’s horse and held his hand up to the men.  “All of you head south and meet up with the Ponderosa hands.   You’ll be cutting a break and moving this way.”

 

Without a word, the men turned their horses and rode south.  Digger, dismounted and smacked his horse in the rear.  “What can I do, Mr. Cartwright?”

 

Grasping Digger’s shoulder, Adam bent close to his ear.  “Count heads here, Digger.  Find out if we have injuries to tend.  And find Cooper and send him to me.”

 

Both Ben and Adam grabbed tools that Adam had taken from the lumber wagon and headed into the front edge of the fire.

 

Chapter Twelve

 

Ming Lin had just settled back into his bed when he heard another knock at the door.  He had already left the coffee pot warming on the stove expecting Mr. Cartwright back at any time, but Mr. Cartwright wouldn’t have knocked.

 

He redressed in his outer clothing and hurried to the door.  “Mrs. Cartwright, please come in.  I will wake…uh…Mrs. Cartwright,” he said with a troubled look on his face.  He’d already had trouble speaking with multiple Cartwright men.  Now there were two Cartwright wives.

 

“No, Ming Lin.  It’s all right.  I’ll go, but before I do, would you mind gathering blankets and pillows, as many as you have.   We need to prepare to take in injured men from the mine.”

 

Ming Lin bowed.  “Yes, Mrs. Cartwright.”

 

When Annie reached the bedroom door, she started to knock, but decided to quietly push the door open.

 

“Adam, is that you?” came Shiloh’s voice from the bed.

 

“No, it’s me.  How can you sleep?” Annie asked, feeling her way in the dark toward the bed.

 

Suddenly there was light.  Shiloh had sat up on the side of the bed and lit the lamp.  “Does it sound like I was sleeping?   Why are you here in the middle of the night?”

 

“More like early morning,” Annie answered, sitting next to Shiloh.  “Don’t you know what’s happened?”

 

“I know there was an explosion at the mine.  Adam went to check on it.”

 

Shaking her head, Annie said, “Oh, it’s more than that.  That explosion caused a fire, and every man on the Ponderosa and the Flying W, including the men from the timber camps are probably all there now fighting it.”

 

Shiloh held her breath for a moment.  She knew well that a fire could sweep through both ranches in just a few hours.  “I can’t go help, Annie.  I have to stay with Abel.”

 

“I know that.  So I thought you and Ming Lin could prepare for injured men here.  Ming Lin is gathering blankets and pillows, but we’ll need bandages, clean water and whatever you have here to treat cuts and burns.”

 

“Hop Sing has the salve he uses for Micah’s feet.  I’ll send Ming Lin to get him,” Shiloh said, already on her feet, dressing.  “But you’re not riding into that by yourself.  I’ll have Tom go with you.  You can take the buckboard. Tom can start bringing any injured men.”

 

Annie smiled.  “Even though things have changed, you haven’t changed at all.”

 

“Though I’m not real happy about the situation, I am happy to have something…meaningful…to do,” Shiloh replied, answering Annie’s smile.

 

After Shiloh finished dressing, she left the door open so she could hear if Abel woke and escorted Annie down the stairs just as Ming Lin was setting the coffee service on the dining room table.

 

“Thank you, Ming Lin,” said Shiloh.  “Would you please go down to the stable and get Tom.  Ask him to hitch the buckboard and wait for Annie.  He’ll be taking her over to the mine and helping her with injuries.”

 

Ming Lin bowed and disappeared back into the kitchen where he pulled his coat on.  He would never complain about his job, certainly having no reason to complain.  The job, though demanding at times, was enjoyable.  But the one thing he disliked about it were the ‘quick’ trips down to the stable.  If it had been during daylight hours with no urgency, he would have enjoyed the walk.  But more often than not, the request was immediate and that meant he had to saddle a horse, make the trip, and then unsaddle the horse.  He detested horses.

 

While they waited for Ming Lin to return with Tom, the ladies sipped coffee at the dining room table.  “How’s Hoss?” asked Shiloh.

 

Annie scowled. “Well, he’s run out to fight a fire in the dark, so I suppose that means he can see well enough.”

 

Shiloh gave her an amused grin as she looked up over her coffee cup.  “Don’t you know?”

 

“I can only go on what he tells me.  His eyes look fine.  But sometimes I see him rubbing them like he’s trying to get things in focus.”

 

“Give it time, Annie,” Shiloh said, reaching out for Annie’s hand.  “You yourself said it might take a long time for his eyes to get back to normal.  And you also said he may need to wear spectacles.   Maybe you should test his vision.”

 

“I tried,” Annie replied, rolling her eyes.  “He wanted nothing to do with it.”

 

Shiloh chucked, and Annie barked, “What’s so funny?  This is nothing to be laughing about.”

 

“I know,” answered Shiloh, holding up her hand in surrender.  “It’s just that they all expect everyone else to see a doctor for every little thing, but when it comes to themselves…”  She didn’t finish, but rather shook her head.

 

Ming Lin and Tom came through the front door.

 

“Oh good,” said Shiloh, pushing up from the table.  “Tom, did Ming Lin tell you we have an emergency?”   He nodded.  “Good.  Would you please give Mrs. Cartwright whatever help she needs?  You’ll be taking the buckboard and bringing injured men back here.”

 

“Yes ma’am.  I’ll go get it hitched.”  With that, he disappeared out the door.

 

“Now, Ming Lin.”  She winced.  “I know you don’t like riding, especially at night, but would you go to the main house and ask Hop Sing to prepare the salve he uses on Micah’s feet.  That should help any of these men who’ve been burned.”

 

“I will take the buggy, Mrs. Cartwright.  Hop Sing will want to come here to help.”

 

“Good idea.  While you’re gone, I’ll make sure the other bedrooms are ready.  We’ll stack the extra blankets down here in case if we have more men than rooms.”

 

When Tom, Annie and Ming Lin all left, Shiloh busied herself preparing the bedrooms Adam had just recently finished.  She then went to the room downstairs between his study and her piano room and began folding blankets into pallets on the floor.  She paused several times when she noticed her hands shaking.  Adam would be in the middle of that fire, trying to put it out, yelling orders to send men to the hot spots, telling them which trees to fell.  But she couldn’t afford to let her mind go there. Each time her mind began to drift to him, she took a deep breath as she shook away her fear that he would be one of those men brought back with injuries or worse, that his lifeless body would be brought home to her.

 

***

 

“Bill, we need to take down these front trees,” Adam yelled above the roar of the fire.  “The crowns are burning and sending embers deeper into the forest.”

 

“But Mr. Cartwright,” answered Bill with fear in his eyes.  “If we’re under these trees when limbs fall….”

 

“Three men to each tree,” shouted Adam.  “Two to cut and one lookout.”

 

Swallowing a lump in his throat, Bill nodded and turned to collect the men.

 

Adam turned to look deeper into the orange glow for his father.   He yelled, but to no avail. As strong as his voice was, it did not carry over the howl of the flames.  Running forward, he stumbled, his hand landing on a smoldering piece of wood.  He recoiled and looked at the blisters rising on the palm of his hand and jumped when a crack sounded above him.  As he looked up at the limb falling toward him, a hand grabbed his collar and pulled him back, sending him sprawling on the charred remains of pine straw and cones.

 

Looking up, all he could see was the silhouette of a man, but when that man spoke, he let his head fall back, releasing a breath through his mouth.  “It’s good to see you, Pa.  I thought I lost you out there,” Adam said, nodding toward the heart of the fire.

 

Ben pulled his son to his feet.  “And I thought I’d lost you,” Ben answered as he looked up into the burning boughs above them.  “We have to get out of here.  Come on,” he said, pulling Adam by an arm back toward the mine.

 

***

 

Hoss and the men from the Mt. Rose timber camp rode as fast as was possible in the forest.  They had seen the glow of the fire almost as soon as they rounded the first mountaintop and rode straight for it.  When they approached the first visible flames,  Hoss held up his arm.

 

“Hoss, the main fire is still more than a mile away,” said one of the men.

 

“I know that,” answered Hoss.  “And that means the fire is spreading this way.  Get your tools.  We’re gonna start a break right here and work our way in.”  Hoss dismounted.  “Mike, why don’t you take these horses back a ways before they spook.”  With that, Hoss pulled an axe from the back of his saddle, looked up at a tall, healthy Ponderosa pine as if to say he was sorry, and began to chop away.

 

***

 

When Ben and Adam had returned to the mine, Ben took a good look at Adam’s hand.  “That’s a bad burn, son.  You’re finished here.”

 

Adam had opened his mouth to argue, but both men turned at the sound of a buckboard almost upon them.  Taking his hand from his father, Adam approached the wagon in a foul mood “Annie, what are you doing here?” he barked.

 

Bowing her head like a bull ready to charge, Annie replied, “I’m a doctor, Adam, whether you choose to recognize it or not.  I’m here to take care of the injured.  Shiloh is preparing beds at the house, and Tom will transport them in the buckboard,” she said while climbing down from the wagon.  “Now, if you’ll direct me to where you’re moving the injured men, I’ll do what I’ve been trained to do.”  She looked at his right hand cradled in his left, then glanced up suspiciously.  “What’s wrong with your hand?”

 

“It’s burned,” said Ben.

 

“Pa, I….”

 

Ben pointed at the entrance to the mine shaft.  “Adam, you get that hand tended to.  I won’t have you dying of infection after surviving a fire.”

 

Annie smirked and turned back to the wagon.  “Tom, would you drive the wagon closer to the shaft, and help me unload the supplies.  I’m sure there will be some I’ll send back to the house fairly quickly.” With a light smile, she turned to Adam, moving her hand toward the mine.  “After you.”

 

Glaring at his father, he folded his lips into a tight line, shook his head and grudgingly trudged to the open shaft of the mine.

 

“Shorty, who’s the worst?” asked Annie, walking to the back of the tunnel with Adam following behind.

 

Shorty wiped his hands on his pants and pointed further into the shaft.  “We got a couple of men with some pretty bad burns.  Another un with a broken arm, I reckon.  These up here breathed in too much smoke.  I got em’ breathin’ through wet bandanas.”

 

Smiling sincerely, Annie asked as she bent over the men with burns, “Where did you learn to do that?”

 

“I reckon I’ve seen more than one fire in my life.  That’s what they tell you to do to stop coughing from the smoke.”

 

Pulling back the tattered cloth from the leg of a man leaning against the rock wall, Annie said, “Well, whoever they were knew what they were doing.  What’s your name?” she asked the injured man.

 

“Bales, ma’am.”

 

“I’m going to take a look at your leg, Mr. Bales.  This might hurt a bit.”

 

“Ma’am, ain’t Doc Martin here?  I mean, I need a doctor.”

 

Drawing herself upright, Annie furrowed her brow.  “I am a doctor, Mr. Bales.  Now be still, please.”

 

Bales mouthed silently to Adam, “A woman doctor?”

 

“That’s right,” snapped Adam.  “You just keep your mouth shut, and do what she tells you.”

 

By the time Annie identified the men who would ride in the back of the wagon to the house, Adam had slipped to the front of the shaft, wrapped his hand in a clean bandage and went back into the fray to fight the fire.

 

As soon as the more seriously injured men were loaded and Tom occupied the seat, Annie began to look for Adam, moving ever closer to the fire.

 

Cupping her hands around her mouth, she shouted, “Adam!”

 

Catching Ben’s attention, he lowered his axe and went to her.  “Annie, what’s wrong?”

 

“I can’t find Adam.  His hand needs attention.”

 

Gently pushing her back, he growled, “I’ll find him.  You step back away from the fire.  It won’t do any of us any good if you’re both burned.”

 

Annie turned back to look once she reached the buckboard, her eyes settling on two men facing each other, obviously arguing.

 

“Pa, I’m all right.  I’ve gotten worse burns stoking the fire at the house.”

 

Ben pointed at his son.  “I’ve seen enough burns in my day to know your hand needs attention.  Now get back to the wagon.”

 

“Look around you, Pa.  This is my responsibility.  If you were me, would you abandon it?”

 

“No one is abandoning anything.”  Ben grabbed at Adam’s arm, but Adam jerked away.

 

“Pa, I’m not going, and that’s final.” With that said, he turned back into the fire.

 

Chapter Thirteen

 

Shiloh heard the buckboard come into the yard and hurried toward the door.  She watched as Hop Sing trotted through the kitchen door to the wagon, followed by Ming Lin, looking over the side and shaking his head.

 

“Tom, would you help Hop Sing and Ming Lin get these men into a bed upstairs?” asked Annie.

 

Nodding, Tom picked up the end of a blanket that Annie had directed the men be laid on.  Hop Sing and Ming Ling each took the corners at the other end and the three men carried the fire victims up the stairs one by one.

 

Shiloh stopped Annie on her way up.  “You have water, towels and Hop Sing’s salve in each room.”

 

Hugging Shiloh tightly, Annie whispered, “Would you send Tom for Dr. Martin?”

 

Shiloh gently pushed her back, giving her a quizzical look.

 

“I can’t tend to all these men.  There’s too many and their injuries are too severe.  Besides that, I have nothing to give them for the pain.”

 

Nodding, Shiloh answered, “All right.  I’ll send Tom to town, and Hop Sing can drive the buckboard back to the mine when you’re ready.  Now, what else can I do?”

 

“Pray.”  Annie watched the color drain from Shiloh’s face, then took her hand and led her up the stairs.  “And come help me with bandages.  It’ll keep your mind off the fire.”

 

When the two women entered the first bedroom, Shiloh said faintly, “Somehow, I don’t think so.”

 

Both women were silent as they worked on the first man, carefully removing the fabric from around the worst of the burns.

 

“Shiloh, while I clean these burns, I want you to go to the next man and do the same thing we just did here.”  Noticing her unsteady hands, Annie grabbed them.  “You can do this.  I need you to do this.”

 

“Annie.”

 

Annie could barely hear her.

 

Looking into Annie’s eyes, Shiloh fought back tears.  “Adam?”

 

Annie bowed her head, inhaled deeply and let the breath out through her mouth.  “He’s fighting the fire with the other men.”

 

“He’s all right?”

 

Looking away, Annie frowned.  She couldn’t lie.  Shiloh would see straight through it.  “He has some burns on his right hand, but he wrapped some cloth around it and went back out to fight the fire.”

 

Shiloh grabbed her arm. “How could you let him go?”

 

“I didn’t let him go,” she answered, glaring down at Shiloh’s hand on her arm.  “I was getting these men loaded.  Pa tried to get him to come with me, but they argued, and Adam…left.  I couldn’t wait.”

 

Both women turned toward Shiloh’s bedroom, hearing Abel begin to cry.  “I…I’ll go take care of Abel, and then start in the next room,” said Shiloh.  She started to say something more, but gave up, unable to form the words, and left for the nursery.

 

Annie watched her go, wondering if she was going to be able to continue.  She was so pale.  And with good reason. She had seen fires on both ranches before.  Moving her hand to the doorframe, Annie steadied herself before she re-entered the bedroom.  After all, Hoss was somewhere in that fire, too.

 

Shiloh stood at the door of the nursery taking deep breaths.  She didn’t want Abel to sense her fear.  When she thought she had her emotions under control, she put a smile on her face and walked into the room, leaning over the crib.  “Hello, my sweet Abel,” she said as she unbuttoned her blouse.  Lifting and tucking him in her arms, she turned and sat in the rocker and settled him down for his meal.

 

Abel had gotten used to his mother’s voice, soft and lilting, as he nursed.  He’d occasionally stop and smile while looking up into her happy eyes.  Though he had no idea what it was to feel safe or loved, some part of him knew she loved him, knew he was safe when she was near.   It was different this time.  There was no comforting voice, no smiling eyes looking back at him.  That part of him that knew he was loved, for the first time, felt something akin to a strangeness; that something wasn’t quite right.

 

When Abel frowned and met her eyes with his, gently whimpering, Shiloh realized just how tense she had become trying to stifle her tears.  Caressing his head in her hand, she began to rock him, to whisper to him, calming him, smiling at him as much as she could, but even so an occasional tear still fell upon her little boy’s head.

 

***

Hop Sing went back to the mine with Annie who was deciding who should be taken back to the house first.  After two more runs of the wagon, those men who were left at the mine had minor injuries and could ride to the house on their own.  By the time the last wagon got to the house, Dr. Martin had arrived and was already working on men in the room between Adam’s office and Shiloh’s music room.

 

Shiloh was hurrying through the house carrying a bucket of hot water when Annie came through the door.  She stopped and looked at Annie with hope-filled eyes, but all Annie could offer was a shake of her head as she closed her eyes.  Taking a deep breath, Shiloh nodded and continued into the room where Dr. Martin worked, knowing full well Annie would be just as worried as she.

 

***

 

Adam stopped for a moment to catch his breath, then decided taking deep breaths wasn’t the best thing for him to do.  His throat felt raw from breathing in the hot smoke of the fire.  Raising his arm, he wiped away the sweat pouring down his forehead, and continued on through the smoldering brush, pushing dirt over any remaining flames with the business end of his axe.  When he heard a familiar voice calling his name, he stopped and looked through hazy air.

 

“Hey, Adam!” shouted Hoss.

 

The corner of Adam’s mouth turned up in relief as he let the axe head drop to the ground and waited for Hoss to get to him.

 

“Am I glad to see you,” said Hoss.  “Does this mean we beat it?”

 

“On this end, yes,” answered Adam. Turning, he looked south.  “I don’t know how Joe’s doing.”

 

“You look plumb tuckered out,” said Hoss, taking a good, long look at his older brother.  “I’ll have these fellas keep looking for hot spots.  Then you and me are gonna head back to see if Joe needs help.”

 

It was all Adam could do to nod.  While every muscle in his body was complaining, his hand seemed to be screaming.  He thought to unwrap it and look, but then decided he’d delay that as long as possible.  He knew it wasn’t going to look good, and probably wasn’t going to feel good or be very useful for a long while.

 

When Hoss and Adam got back to the mine, the first thing Adam did was yell for his father.  Hearing no response, both men moved quickly around the mine buildings that were left, and then ducked into the shaft, searching.  Coming up empty-handed, they gave each other a nervous look, and then headed back into the charred remains of the forest, yelling as they went.

 

Morning’s light cast an eerie glow through the lingering smoke over the tall, black sticks that remained standing.  The men putting out the small fires that flamed up moved against the blackness, flitting left to right as one fire was extinguished and another sent yellow-orange feathers up through the embers.  Still, neither Adam nor Hoss heard an answer from their now desperate calls.

 

“Mr. Cartwright!  Over here!”

 

Chills went down Adam’s spine as the hair stood up on the back of his neck.  Hoss felt it, too; the dread that they were about to find their father lying in what was left of part his cherished woodland.

 

When they got to the men who had gathered around, they both skidded to a halt at the sight of the blackened body lying on the ground underneath a tree limb.  Before either man took another step, the men who found their father had lifted the trunk up and away and turned the body over.

 

“He’s breathin’!  Let’s get him out of here,” shouted one of the men.

 

“Dan,” said Adam, pulling a man to his side.  “The mine wagon is over next to the shaft.  Run ahead and get a team hitched.  See if there’s any blankets left over in the shaft.  And see if you can find Evans.”

 

“I’m right here, Adam.”

 

Adam’s head snapped back toward the men who were carrying his father.  He’d not recognized his superintendent because he, and all the men around them, were covered in fine, black ashes.

 

Chuck Evans stepped aside as another man took his place.  He and Adam walked together toward the mine behind the men transporting his father.

 

“Chuck, as soon as you get cleaned up, take a good look at what’s left of the powder house.  I want to know what caused the explosion by the end of the day.”

 

Without questioning, Chuck nodded and ran off after Dan.  This explosion happened on his watch. It was his responsibility as far as he was concerned.  He knew the kegs of powder in the powder house were stored correctly without there being any chance of an accidental spark to set them off.  He checked them himself the morning before the explosion.  His first inclination was that someone deliberately blew them up, and he was going to prove it.  After all, it was his good name, as well as the miners he’d come to know, and now the boss’s father that were in jeopardy.

 

When they arrived at the mine with Ben, Adam directed the men as they lifted his father into the back of the wagon.

 

Running up to the buckboard, Chuck was out of breath, but said, “I’ll send these men toward Joe and the others.  I’m not seeing any high flames south, so it looks like they’ve got a handle on that side.”

 

Adam nodded as he climbed into the back of the wagon while Hoss climbed into the seat and snapped the reins without even waiting for everyone to clear.

 

In the meantime, Adam sat quietly next to his father, looking over his clothes to determine how severely he’d been burned.  To his relief, much of the black that shrouded his father was the black ash that covered everyone.  Still, that tree limb had been big…big enough to break bones, and his father had a nasty gash on his forehead spilling bright, red blood that slowly spread over the ashes that covered his face.

 

Hop Sing and Ming Lin had seen the wagon coming up the hill toward the yard and met it at the bottom of the front porch steps.  At first, they didn’t recognize Adam and Hoss they were so dirty, but once the brothers opened their mouths, there was no doubt who they were.

 

Peeking over the side of the back of the buckboard, Hop Sing’s face transformed into dismay as he rattled something in Cantonese to Ming Lin.  Whatever it was, Ming Lin swiftly disappeared into the house.

 

“You bring Mr. Cartlight in through kitchen.  He stay in back room,” said Hop Sing.

 

“One of the bedrooms will do, Hop Sing.”

 

Wildly shaking his head, Hop Sing said, “No rooms left.  Men already there.”

 

“Adam, he’ll feel better at home,” said Hoss as the two men grabbed the corners of the blanket on which Ben lay.

 

“We can’t take the chance he won’t make it there,” said Adam. “Let’s find out if he’s all right first.”

 

The two men followed Hop Sing through the kitchen door with their burden.  The bed was already prepared, but Ben was laid on the bed on the blanket at Hop Sing’s direction, so he could remove his employer’s clothes and clean him up before he dared to cover him with clean linen.  In truth, their official relationship had not crossed his mind.

 

Turning his head away from Ben for a moment, Hop Sing said quietly, “Dr. Martin in room downstairs.  You bring him here.”

 

Ming Lin busied himself in the kitchen making a meal and several pots of coffee.  He was well aware that other men from the fire would be coming to the house as well as the families of the more injured men when word had spread of the fire.  The news was already out, so it was just a matter of time.  Several women had already arrived and were helping Dr. Martin and the two Mrs. Cartwrights.

 

Shiloh was in the far bedroom with Emily White who was keeping vigil over her husband, Hal.  Hal had been burned over the entire front of his body when the wind created from the blistering heat carried the flames right into him.  His wounds had been cleared of debris and cleaned, and even through that, he never regained consciousness.  Shiloh had been watching his chest barely rise and fall, and when his chest didn’t rise again, she closed her eyes and wilted in her chair.  Folding her lips, she took several short breaths before she looked across at Emily, who hadn’t noticed her husband was gone.  She wondered to herself if giving Emily a few more moments of hope would be too terribly wrong.  Standing, she went to stand behind Emily, moving her hands to the woman’s shoulders.  She watched as Emily’s hand found its way upward, seeking to clasp her own, and when Emily found the hand resting on her shoulder, Shiloh squeezed, and the shuddering she expected began as Emily bowed her head.

 

Hal and Emily had only been married six months.  They were expecting their first child in the fall.

 

When Shiloh saw Adam standing in the doorway, her first impulse was to run to him, but she resisted.  How could she run into the arms of her very alive husband when this poor woman would never feel her husband’s arms around her again?  Raising her free hand to her mouth to stifle her cry, she finally managed through trembling lips, “Would you bring Paul or Annie?”

 

Adam pleadingly asked with his eyes, and when Shiloh shook her head, he nodded sadly and turned back into the hall.

 

When Annie stepped into the room, it took only one look at the man on the bed.  She had already known that Hal White wasn’t going to make it.  Besides severe burns to his skin, it was apparent his lungs had been compromised based on the blood and tissue he had coughed up just before she had given him a large dose of laudanum.  She walked forward and pulled the crisp, white sheet covering his body up over his head, sending Emily into an all out wail.

 

Shiloh firmly grasped her arms and coaxed her out of the chair and out the door, not stopping until she was downstairs.

 

Emily’s mother, Evie, was downstairs setting food on the table for anyone to eat when there was time.  She had stopped when she saw her daughter slowly descending the stairs, holding tightly to Shiloh’s arm.  Evie stopped what she was doing and met them at the foot of the stairs, first looking into Shiloh’s eyes where she read the news before Shiloh ever shook her head.  Gently, Evie took Emily’s arm and enveloped her daughter and unborn child.

 

Shiloh took several steps away.   “Tom,” she called quietly.

 

Tom had just delivered a bucket of water to the downstairs room, and was on his way back to the kitchen with soiled cloth.  He stopped and laid the linen aside, wiping his hands on the legs of his trousers.  “Yes, ma’am.”

 

“Would you please drive Mrs. Rogers and Mrs. White back to town?”  He had nodded and started away, but Shiloh touched his arm as he passed. “Stop by the church and ask the minister to go by Mrs. Roger’s house, and then ask Mr. Farrell at the undertakers to come by.”

 

Nodding, Tom left to hitch the buggy.

 

Shiloh went back to Evie, whispering in her ear and receiving a nod in return.  Then she gathered the women’s things and between Shiloh, Tom and Evie, they were able to get Emily into the buggy along with all the things the two woman brought with them.  Watching until the buggy was out of sight, she turned back to the house in search of Adam.

 

She found him standing in the door of Ming Lin’s room, his hand up at his mouth, his fingers pinching his bottom lip.  She knew that look.  Her first thought was that he was all right, but having seen the worry in his eyes, she knew he really wasn’t.  The only thing she didn’t know was who was in that room that had him so worried.  She hadn’t seen Hoss or Pa anywhere in the house.

 

When Annie appeared next to her, Shiloh felt for her hand at her side, found it and squeezed.  The two women nodded at each other, then pushed past Adam and into the room.  Both women allowed their heads to fall back as they both exhaled toward the ceiling.

 

Then Annie went to work next to Paul, gently wiping the black soot from Ben’s face so that she could clean the wound there while Paul searched for other problems.

 

Adam watched Shiloh as she stood at the foot of the bed, taking soiled cloths, dropping them into a bowl, and passing clean, wet linen back.  Deep down he was proud that she was holding herself together, but then he smiled thinking she had yet to find out how badly burned his hand was.  With that thought, the searing pain from the burn on the palm of his hand lurched forward in his mind, and it was all he could do to keep from yelling out.

 

Chapter Fourteen

 

The house was unnervingly quiet.  Shiloh laughed at that thought.  The last several days had been loud and uncomfortable to say the least.  Now, the only sound was the occasional call from Abel from the upstairs nursery and the low mumbled conversations around the dining room table.

 

She had separated herself from the members of the families who were sleeping on the chairs and floors in the bedrooms of their loved ones still there.  Many of the injured had gone to their own homes to recuperate, but the worst were too serious to move.  Two more had died, and Dr. Martin and Annie were not willing to risk any more by moving them.

 

Shiloh hadn’t found out just how bad Adam’s hand was until after Paul and Annie had done all they could for Ben, who still lay unconscious in Ming Lin’s bed.  While she was distracted somewhere else, both doctors pulled Adam into the big bedroom upstairs and began working on his hand.  Before they were finished, Adam had been dosed with laudanum so the worst of the burn could be cleaned and bandaged.  They left him upstairs in bed, and other than two attempts to look at the work on his desk, he’d mostly stayed there.  The pain in his hand was bad enough to nauseate him to the point that he hadn’t eaten more than a few bites for several days.

 

Standing in the kitchen in front of the stove, Shiloh absentmindedly stirred the soup pot, then remembered she had come into the kitchen to prepare a bowl of soup for Adam.  He had refused to eat before, but he was at the point that if he didn’t eat and drink something, he would only make his condition worse.

 

Ming Lin watched her for a moment, and decided she was still too battle-weary to function.  Gently moving her to the side, he prepared a bowl of soup, and set it on a tray with milk and bread.  Next, he pushed the tray into her hands and smiled.  “There is butter and apricot jam on the tray.  If Mr. Cartwright will not eat the soup, prepare the bread with butter and jam.”

 

Finally raising her eyes to his, she smiled.  “Bless you, Ming Lin.”  Their cook had learned so much about each one of them in his short tenure there.

 

The door to the bedroom remained ajar so that Shiloh could hear Abel when he awoke.  She quietly pushed it open further to allow her entrance with the tray.  Adam appeared to be sleeping, so she quietly set the tray on the bed table, then settled into the chair next to the bed.

 

She stared at her hands trying to remember if there had ever been a time when she had been so…numb…so unable to think.  The events of the last few months, beginning with Abel’s birth, had continued to escalate until now, when she began to wonder if she had actually reached the limit of what she could handle.

 

Adam’s deep, but weak voice startled her out of her reverie.  “You look worn out.”

She smiled before she looked up at him.  “You look worse.”  When he turned his head away, she continued softly.  “I need you to eat something.  I realize nothing seems very palatable right now, but you’ll just continue to get weaker if you don’t get something down.”

 

He turned back to her.  “I’ll eat something after you get out whatever you need to say, and then let it go.”

 

Clasping her hands in her lap and leaning back in the chair, she gazed upon him, moving from his eyes down to his bandaged hand, and then back to his eyes.  Leaning forward and raising her hand to his forehead, her voice was quiet, even, and completely absent of anger.  “I understand why you went back into the fire, Adam.  You have this vast sense of responsibility born of growing up while building all that is the Ponderosa…not just the land, but the reputation that goes along with it.  When I look at you, I see a man who’s bigger than life, who lives for the next challenge…” Her hand moved down to his chest where he moved his to cover hers, wrapping his fingers carefully around what felt so small and delicate to him.  “That was fine when it was just you.  I know you have your father and brothers, but they don’t need you the way…”  She turned away, opening her mouth slightly to ward off tears stinging her eyes.  When she recovered, she turned her hand and grasped his tightly while looking pleadingly into his eyes.  “You have a son who needs you, Adam. He needs you alive and healthy…and present.  When you make decisions based on your sense of what’s right, or when you take on the next challenge that excites you, you need to think about how your decision affects Abel.”

 

“And what about you?” he whispered.

 

Moving from the chair to sit on the side of the bed, Shiloh pulled his hand to her chest, holding it there.  When she smiled, Adam could see her sadness, her surrender. “Lately, I’ve felt that all you do, the ranches, the timber, the mine…even Slater…is like losing you to another woman.”  When his brows furrowed and his chest rose with a sudden, contrite breath, she shook her head and moved a finger to his lips.  “Ssh.   Let me finish.”  Once he relaxed, she continued. “I’ve had lots of time to come to the understanding that you’re doing all this for us.  But Adam, we both need you to be with us.  I don’t care about any of this,” she said, waving her free hand at the room, “if it means you never have time for us.”

 

He pulled her by her hand down to him, and when she was close, he moved his hand to the back of her neck and brought her down to his lips, kissing her, and then holding her there.  “It was never my intention to make you feel that way,” he whispered.

 

“I know,” she whispered back.  They kissed again, a long, gentle kiss that seemed to make everything right.   “Now, you need to eat,” she said, carefully pushing herself back up and standing.  “Let’s get you up so I can set the tray in front of you and watch you try to eat soup with your left hand.”

 

An eyebrow arched.  “Are you making fun of me?”

 

“Yes,” she said as she held his injured hand up and away while he adjusted himself up in the bed.   “You didn’t think you were going to get out of this completely unscathed, did you?”  She winked and turned for the tray, moving it over him.  “You haven’t had anything to eat and not much to drink for two days.   I want you to eat every bit of that.”

 

He folded his lips and gave her a quick nod, knowing there was no point in arguing.

While Adam ate, Shiloh brought Abel in from the nursery even though he was still asleep.  She sat in the chair, holding the baby with his head on her shoulder.  “Is there much pain?” she asked quietly.

 

Glancing down at his hand resting on a pillow next to him, he nodded as he took another spoonful of soup.  “Have you seen it?”

 

“Mm hm,” she answered with a frown.  “In fact, when you’ve finished your soup, I’m going to ask Dr. Martin or Annie to come up.  “You felt a little hot to me.”

 

“How’s Pa?”

 

She looked away for a moment, before she moved her eyes back to his.

 

Laying the spoon on the soup bowl, Adam gave her that unyielding look that said he expected an answer out of her.

 

“Well, he’s…he hasn’t come to yet.”  Shiloh watched him cock his head, saw the muscles of his jaw move from clenching his teeth.  “Adam, this isn’t your fault.  Charles Evans came by late the same night you and Hoss brought Pa here.  He said he found parts of a very distinguishable black line that led from the granite bedrock toward where the powder house had been.  It wasn’t powder, but he’d seen it before…where a line of powder had burned, leaving the granite underneath stained black.  He showed Roy, and Roy agreed that someone deliberately blew up the powder house.”

 

“And Pa?” Adam asked impatiently.

 

“He has some bruised ribs, not broken.   And he does have some burns.  The ash he fell into was still hot, though not hot enough to set his clothes on fire because they were covered with ash…something akin to smoldering.  His burns aren’t as severe as yours, but Paul said he’ll be uncomfortable for a while.   His biggest concern is the blow to Pa’s head that caused the gash.  There was another deep cut at the back where it looked like he hit a rock.   Paul won’t know anything until Pa wakes up.”

 

“And how long will that be?”

 

“As long as it takes,” came a voice from the bedroom door.  “I’m relieved to see you eating.”

 

Adam started to lift the tray out of his way, but he winced as soon as he moved his right hand.

 

Shiloh shot up out of the chair.  “I’ll get it,” she said as she laid the baby next to him on the bed so he couldn’t really move.  “You just stay put.”    Sitting down on the side of the bed, she pulled the tray further down his legs, and began to spread butter and jam on a piece of bread.  “Paul, I think he has a fever.”

 

Adam snapped his head back toward Shiloh and crooked his jaw.

 

Chuckling at Shiloh’s apparent trapping of her husband in the bed, Paul said, “Well, he was never a very good patient.  But it looks like you’ve covered all sides quite admirably.”

 

“What do you mean as long as it takes?” said Adam angrily as he glared at Shiloh.

 

“Oh, dear.  You didn’t think you were getting up, did you?” she asked, shaking her head.

 

“I mean exactly that, Adam,” said Paul.  “Your father took a serious blow.  I’d say somewhere on the same order Shiloh did when the tree fell on the house.  And it took her several days to regain consciousness.   He’s breathing well, and his pulse is strong.  We just need to give him whatever time he needs.”

 

“And his burns?” asked Adam, now somewhat subdued.

 

“He’ll be tender…like he worked in the sun too long.  He may not even notice the burns.  I think his head will make him forget about his other injuries.  “Now,” said Paul, moving his hand to Adam’s forehead.  “Let’s see if you have a fever.”    Slowly lowering his hand, Paul looked over at Shiloh.   “You’re right.  He does have a fever.  Would you please clear the bed?  I want to take a look at his hand.”

 

Slowly standing, Shiloh gave Paul a concerned look.  “Of course.”  She moved the tray back to the night table, then lifted Abel into her arms and backed away, gently rocking the baby back and forth as she watched and waited while Paul slowly unwrapped Adam’s hand.   She winced when Adam sucked in deep breaths as Paul slowly removed the bandages that were sticking to the seeping burns.”

 

“I was afraid of this.  There was just too much debris embedded in the burn to clean out.”  Turning all the way around, Paul asked Shiloh, “Would you go downstairs and ask Annie to bring up a bottle of Labarraque’s Solution.  I need to get this cleaned out again, and hopefully stop this infection before it spreads.”

 

Shiloh felt like the blood had drained from her head.  She felt dizzy and couldn’t collect her thoughts.

 

“Shiloh?”

 

“I’m…I’m all right,” she answered, hurrying into the nursery.

 

“You should take him down with you,” said Adam.  “He can sleep in the cradle for awhile.  I’m sure it’s quiet down there.”

 

Standing at the nursery entry for a moment, she looked at Adam, her eyebrows turned downward.  When he narrowed his eyes and nodded, she inhaled, then nodded back and hurried out of the room.

 

After sending Annie upstairs, Shiloh sat in the wing chair in the living room, holding Abel close.  The men’s wives were with them in the bedrooms and in the unfinished room downstairs.  Hop Sing and Ming Lin spent their time in the kitchen cooking or in the back bedroom tending to Ben.  There was nothing really for her to do but wait and see how bad the infection in Adam’s hand would get before it ran its course.

 

She had no idea how long she had sat with Abel laying across her lap and her head in her hand when a hand touched her shoulder.

 

“Mrs. Cartwright, you have not eaten,” said Ming Lin, motioning to the dining room.

 

She gave him a weary smile, but got up from her chair without an argument.  She laid Abel in the cradle that stayed downstairs, and then stopped just short of the dining room and looked at the tired faces around the table, all of them women, some she knew, some she only knew of. All of them stopped eating and waited for Shiloh to take her place at the head of the table.

 

“Would you pray with me?” she asked.   When all heads were bowed, she began, “Our Heavenly Father, we praise your name and thank you for granting us another day, for friendships old and new, and for the bounty you have set before us.  We ask that you watch over our families, protect our children from harm and heal our sick and afflicted.  For those who have gone from us, we pray that you take them into your heavenly kingdom to abide in peace and without pain forever.  We humbly ask you to bless this food to the nourishment of our bodies and our bodies to your service.  In your Holy name we pray.  Amen.”

 

There was a whispered ‘Amen’ around the table before everyone quietly resumed eating.

 

Shiloh looked at her empty plate, wondering if she could actually swallow anything because of the lump in her throat.

 

The woman sitting beside her covered her hand, smiled and nodded at food on the table, and when Shiloh looked up, all eyes were on her expressing their thanks without a word spoken.

 

Chapter Fifteen

 

Joe slowly rode over to the Flying W to fetch Hank, the ranch’s foreman.  Hoss had called a meeting when one of the neighboring ranchers had offered to help with the cattle drives.   He wasn’t paying much attention to where he was going as he thought back to the day of the fire.

 

Chuck Evans had sent some reinforcements from the Mt. Rose timber camp to help snuff out the remaining fires south of the mine.  He’d also sent a message.

 

“Hey, Joe,” called one of the men.

 

Joe pointed at another flare-up, then walked over to a man named Bill, one of the lumbermen from the Mt. Rose timber camp.

 

“Bill, can I assume that since you’re here, the fire’s out up there?” asked Joe, offering his hand.

 

“We’re still looking for hotspots, but for the most part, it’s done.  Uh, Joe.  Evans asked me to tell you your pa’s been hurt.  You need to go on to the house.”

 

Flaring his nostrils and furrowing his brow, Joe asked, “How bad?  Is he all right?”

 

Bill stood with his hands on his hips, looking down at the ground. “No one really knew at the time.  But you need to get on home.  He looked pretty bad.”

 

As Joe turned toward his horse, he spoke loudly over his shoulder.  “What about Hoss and Adam?”

 

“Hoss is fine.  But Adam has a pretty bad burn to his hand.”

 

Joe remembered getting to the house, and standing behind Hoss, whose body was blocking the narrow door to Ming Lin’s bedroom.

 

“Hoss?”

 

Hoss looked over his shoulder, then turned.  Shoving his hands in his pockets, he said, “Joe, we don’t know nothing yet.  Paul’s still lookin’ at him.”

 

Looking past Hoss, Joe swallowed.  “What about Adam?”

 

Suddenly, Adam was standing in the doorway, blocking Joe’s view. 

 

“Let me in,” snapped Joe.

 

Moving his left hand to Joe’s shoulder, Adam gently squeezed.  “Joe, there’s nothing you can do right now.  Annie and Paul are getting him cleaned up.”

 

“He shouldn’t have been there,” bit Joe, pushing Adam’s hand away.  “The Flying W mine has nothing to do with the Ponderosa.”

 

Taking a deep breath, Adam gritted his teeth and walked away.

 

“Now, Joe, don’t you go blaming Adam for nothing,” said Hoss.   “He’s doing a good job of that hisself.”

 

Joe pushed on by, but Hoss stepped in front of him and took his arm, shaking him.  “You know that any fire near the Ponderosa is Ponderosa business.  Adam did what any one of us woulda done.”

 

Looking away, Joe let out a breath, and with it his anger evaporated.  “Call me when they’re finished with Pa, will you?”  He didn’t wait for an answer and went in search of Adam.  But his older brother had already gone upstairs and shut his bedroom door.

 

He hadn’t seen Adam since that day.  Now, he found himself in front of Adam’s house, looking up at the light glowing in the windows, wondering if anything had changed since he’d stopped by yesterday.

 

As the ladies were silently finishing dinner, Shiloh looked up at the sound of the front door latch.  When she saw Joe, she excused herself from the table and walked into the entryway.

 

“How’s Pa today?   Any change?”

 

She gave him a genuine smile, wrapped her arm in his and walked him into the living area.  “Paul said as long as his heart is strong and he’s breathing well, he’s not too worried.”  Based on his expression, she knew her explanation hadn’t garnered any relief.   “No, he still hasn’t come to.”

 

“I don’t understand, Shiloh.  Has Paul tried to wake him up?”

 

“No, and for the time being, he’s not going to.”  Moving her hand to the side of his face, she added, “And don’t you go second guessing the doctors.  There are two of them here, and they’re both in agreement.”

 

Bowing his head and holding his hat in his hand, Joe asked, “Can I go look in on him?”

 

Shiloh took his hat.  “Of course.  But be quiet.  Paul seems to think rest is best for him right now.”

 

Joe turned away, but stopped and looked back.  “How’s Adam?”  He watched a deep frown form on her face as she looked up to the top of the stairs.

 

“He seems all right, but Dr. Martin and Annie are still up there taking care of his hand.  There’s some infection,” she said quietly.

 

Walking back to her, he turned her face up to his and smiled.  “You know Adam well enough to know it’ll take a whole lot more than that to keep him down.”

 

Shiloh closed her eyes as Joe kissed her forehead, and then nodded as she sent him to the back room to see his father.

 

***

 

Thad Baker sat in the chair next to Micah’s bed.  He, like everyone else within a hundred miles had gotten word of the fire and that both Ben and Adam had been injured.  As far as he was concerned, the next two men in line were Hoss and Micah.

 

Besides the fact that Micah still couldn’t travel, Hoss had invited Baker to the main house to meet out of earshot of his father, his brother, and that brother’s wife who he knew would try to take on some of the responsibilities of running at least one of the two ranches.  He had discussed the meeting with Annie, but made her promise not to mention it to Shiloh.

 

Hoss brought in the coffee service and set it on the end of Micah’s bed just as Joe and Hank came through the front door.  “Pull in some chairs, you two,” said Hoss.  When everyone was settled with a cup of coffee, Hoss began, “I think everyone of us knows we have to get the Ponderosa and Flying W beef to market.  We won’t have enough pasture to go around if we don’t sell some off.  Thad here has offered to help with the cattle drives.”

 

Sitting forward, Thad explained his proposal.  “The Ponderosa and Flying W have the big contracts for beef out of Yuma and down Sonora way.  And even with your herds, both places always ask for more beef, but none of the rest of us can afford to drive our smaller herds that far.  If we combine herds for a larger drive, we can take the smaller contracts and still get your beef to market down there.”

 

“Besides yourself, who else are we talking about?” asked Micah.

 

“Burton, Holloway, Dandro and Ramirez are all willing.  Hoss and I already spoke.  By combining our men with fewer of your men that would leave more men for your timber contracts.  And because there’s more Ponderosa and Flying W cattle on the drive, one of you two…” Thad said, pointing to Hoss and then Joe, “…can be trail boss.”

 

Hoss looked around.   “So what do you fellas think?”

 

Hank took a deep breath.  He didn’t really like being part of a decision that would affect both ranches, but under the circumstances, this was probably the only solution to this particular problem.  “If we use the Flying W hands…leave a few behind like we always do to watch the younger herd…that’ll leave the Ponderosa hands to help with the timber.  They have more experience with timber than my men.  That’ll leave one of you here to run the timber camps.”

 

“Yeah,” said Hoss, nodding.  “There’s a couple a men up there now qualified to run the camps, Joe, so if one of us can go back and forth and make sure they all got what they need, we can send Shorty back down to the sawmill to supervise the cuttin’.  But what about the mine?”

 

“Already spoke with Evans,” said Micah.  “The mine’ll stay closed until we find out who’s responsible for all this extra planning.  And I’m already doing the paperwork for the Flying W and a lot of it for the Ponderosa.  I can pick the rest up until Adam or Ben get back on their feet.”

 

“What about the rest of the repairs?” asked Joe.  There’s at least a few that’ll have to be done by fall or we’ll have some big problems in winter.”

 

Hoss crossed his leg.  “There’s a whole lot whichever one of us stays behind’ll just have to figure out.  Adam and Micah have lost 2 miners and one lumber man in the fire, but there’s at least seven others over at Adam’s that still ain’t outta the woods yet.”

 

Joe stood and set his coffee cup on the tray with the pot.  “You’re staying behind.  I’ll take care of the cattle drives.”

 

A smile stole over Hoss’s face. “Well, Little Brother, I don’t rightly recall you ever volunteerin’ for a cattle drive.  As a matter of fact, I can still hear you tryin’ to argue your way outta the last one.”

 

“I figure this isn’t a time to complain, Hoss,” said Joe, bowing his head.  “Pa hasn’t even come to yet, and Adam’s got an infection in his right hand.  And he’s right-handed.”   Joe didn’t have to go on for Hoss to understand exactly what was at stake for Adam.

 

Hoss’s forehead creased in sudden realization. “Hey, do you know if anyone notified that Slater fella?”

 

“Yeah, I think Shiloh sent a telegram,” answered Joe.

 

Hoss slapped his hands down on his thighs and pushed himself up.  “All right then.  The ranches and the timber camps are mine, then.”  Holding his hand out toward Thad as he stood, Hoss shook his hand.  “We’re mighty grateful for the help, Thad.”

 

Grasping Hoss’s hand, Thad smiled as he shook the other man’s huge paw.  “I wouldn’t have my herd if your pa hadn’t given me the land and cattle to start on my own. Most of us wouldn’t.  It’s the least we can do.”

 

***

 

Annie slowly descended the stairs, carrying a bowl full of used cloth.  Shiloh had been making faces at Abel, watching him just beginning to laugh, and then wonder where the sound had come from.  She turned her attention from Abel to the stairs, and when she saw Annie, she cradled the child and rushed over.

 

“How is he?” she asked anxiously after seeing Annie’s frown.

 

“He wouldn’t take more laudanum, so he felt everything.  He’s a strong man, but….  He actually smiled and said ‘thank you’ when we were finished.”

 

“What can I do?” Shiloh asked, fighting tears.

 

“Paul did the work, so he saw more than I could.  You need to talk to him when he comes down.  And then you can do whatever he tells you.”  Looking at the bowl, Annie said, “I need to burn these, and then I need to go home for a little while.  As soon as I get cleaned up, I’ll come back.”

 

Shiloh touched her hand and smiled gratefully.  “Why don’t you stay for awhile?  You haven’t had much rest since all this started.”

 

Annie nodded for Shiloh to follow as she turned to the kitchen.  “I’ll get cleaned up, but I’m coming back.  If there’s nothing else needing my attention, I’ll take a nap.”

 

“Where?  You have a bed at Pa’s house.  I have no idea where I’ll put you here.”

 

Wagging her head, Annie answered, “If the sofa is good enough for you, it’s good enough for me.  Besides,  I don’t see any harm in you sleeping  in your own bed…with your husband.”

 

Both women looked at the stairs when they heard footsteps.

 

“You go talk to Paul while I take care of this,” said Annie, motioning with her chin toward the stairs, and then disappearing around the corner to the kitchen.

 

Shiloh turned, but didn’t move.  She just watched as Paul stopped at the bottom of the stairs, regarded her for a moment, and then walked forward.

 

“I could use a cup of coffee,” he said.  “Is there any left?”

 

She smiled.  “Ming Lin has a fresh pot.  Why don’t you have a seat,” she said, pulling out a chair from the dining room table.  “I’ll bring it in.  Annie said I need to speak with you.”

 

 

Chapter Sixteen

 

Shiloh sat next to the bed with a bowl of cold water and a stack of fresh, clean cloths.  Paul had told her in no uncertain terms that Adam was in trouble.  During the time he and Annie were working on Adam’s hand, the fever had worsened, and based on how fast it had advanced, Paul was afraid he was already too late to try to stop it at Adam’s hand.  Now all they could do was wait for it to run its course.

 

Shiloh debated whether she wanted to know the answer to her question, so she hesitated asking if Adam would pull through.  When Paul couldn’t answer, so many thoughts jammed her mind at once.  How could he go back into that fire knowing how badly his hand had been burned?  How would he feel if he couldn’t draw, if he couldn’t play his guitar?  And worse, how could she tell their son all about his father when she felt there was so much about him she didn’t know?

 

How could she live without him? she thought, wiping a tear from her cheek.

 

She choked out a laugh, a small laugh, but still a laugh.  He could be overbearing, unmovable, unreasonable, frustrating, and just plain stubborn.  But never had she doubted the love he showed her every single day, despite her own shortcomings.  As many questions as she asked herself, she always came back to the same one.  How could she live without him?

 

Groaning, Adam moved his head from one side to the other.

 

She wet a clean cloth in the cold water, wrung it out and gently wiped the sweat off his brow, leaving the cool cloth there.  Before she could move her hand, he reached up and grabbed it with a firmness that surprised her.

 

Leaning over him, she said, “I didn’t expect you to be awake anytime soon.”

 

Closing his eyes, he smiled.  “I had a dream,” he whispered.

 

“Oh?” she said softly as she cooled his face with the cloth.

 

“Laughing children,” he said, barely loud enough to be heard.  “Our children.”  His last word was no more than a breath.

 

With her chin quivering, Shiloh rewet the cloth and bathed his neck, shoulders and chest in cool, refreshing water. For the next three days, she left him only to tend Abel.

 

She’d laid her head on her arms folded on the side of the bed.  She had no idea how long she’d slept, but when she raised her head, she thought she’d seen a ghost.  For a long moment, she simply stared at the man smiling lovingly back at her.

 

Wiping the sleep from her eyes, she asked, “Does Paul know you’re here?  Should you be out of bed?”

 

“Paul’s getting some sleep at the moment, so I didn’t ask.  And other than a little nagging discomfort, I feel fine,” answered Ben.

 

“Still, you should be resting.  You took a nasty blow to the head…in two places.”

 

“I don’t think I’ve missed a single time sitting by Adam’s bed when he was this ill.  I’m not about to miss it now just because I got hit on the head by a tree limb.  And you, young lady, need rest,” he said, leaning forward and giving her a look that made her feel like a young girl who had misbehaved.

 

She sat up straight. “As I recall, Pa, I am his wife, and it’s my responsibility to be here now.  Not yours.”

 

Raising his head and drawing a tense breath, he looked her in the eye answering her challenge.

 

What she saw was a proud man hiding the sting of her words.  Softening, she slightly shook her head and closed her eyes.  “I didn’t mean that the way it sounded.”  Smiling at him, she said,  “Of course, you’re welcome to stay.  He woke up that first day…said he had a dream about laughing children.  But he hasn’t opened his eyes since.”  She began to wring her hands and bowed her head.  “His fever doesn’t seem to be getting any better.”

 

Standing, Ben walked around the bed and stood behind her, squeezing her shoulders as he looked at his eldest son.  “In my experience, it breaks before you realize it…almost all at once.”  When he started walking back around the bed, he staggered, grabbing hold of the post of the footboard.

 

Shiloh shot out of her chair and went to his side, moving his arm over her shoulder and guiding him back to the chair.  “Pa, you need to lie down before you fall down.  Let me help you back downstairs.”

 

Ben slowly lowered himself into the chair. “No.  I’ll be fine.”  Chuckling, he smiled and said, “I can be dizzy up here as well as I can be dizzy down there.  I’ll just have to remember not to move too quickly.”

 

“I’m calling Paul.”

 

“No, you’ll wake him.  He was very tired.  Let him rest,” he said, asking with his eyes, a look that melted her heart.

 

This man who had always been so strong was now weak, perhaps too weak to care for his son as he always had.  She never thought she’d ever see Ben this…exposed.   It broke her heart at the same time it made her realize the man she had looked up to as invincible since she was a child was only human.

 

“Have you tried to eat anything?”

 

He shook his head.

 

“Call me if anything changes.  I’ll bring something up for you.”  When he raised his head to object, she stopped him.  “I don’t want to hear a word.  You know better than anyone that you need to eat to build your strength back up.  You’ll be no good to Adam or anyone else if you collapse again.”  She waited until the corner of his mouth turned up.

 

“You are so like your mother.”

 

***

 

Evening’s approach was heralded by a spectacular sunset that Shiloh could see through the nursery window.  Paul had come up and scolded Ben back downstairs, but not before Shiloh promised to give him regular reports of Adam’s condition.  Joe and Hoss came by and were delighted to see their father up and moving, even though Paul was fussing at him as he followed him back to the bedroom.  It had been difficult for Ben to convince Hoss not to carry him back to bed.

 

The brothers informed their father of their decision to drive both of the herds to market with several of the smaller ranchers to free up the Ponderosa hands for help at the  timber camps.

 

“You know, Pa, we just might make all these timber contracts,” said Hoss, sitting in the chair next to Ben’s borrowed bed.  “Hank’s taking the Flying W hands on the drive, and Joe’s the boss, so there ain’t no reason for none of us to worry.  I’ve got some men in mind to supervise the cuttin’ so Shorty can come back down and run the sawmill.  Besides that, Micah got a telegram from that Crocker fella tellin’ him to delay the next delivery for a month.  Seems Adam’s been keeping ahead of the delivery schedule, and Crocker ain’t got any place to store any more timber.”

 

“Oh, Pa,” started Joe.  “I don’t know if anyone’s told you, but the explosion up at the mine wasn’t an accident.  Someone set the powder off intentionally.”

 

“Any idea who?” asked Ben, propping up on an extra pillow.

 

“Here, Pa,” Hoss said, jumping up.  “Let me help you with that.”

 

Joe waited until his father was settled.  “Roy’s looking into it.  Chuck Evans is helping.”

 

“How’s Micah?”

 

Hoss smiled over at Joe, then at his father. “Pa, you ain’t gonna believe it.  He’s using the wheelchair now.  He’s been doing the paperwork at the desk.”

 

“Did Paul tell him he could do that?” asked Ben with a little more bite in his voice than he’d intended.  With only Micah down, things could be handled, especially with Hank taking care of the Flying W.  But with Micah down and Hoss’s lost vision, things had begun to slip, and now with Adam upstairs unconscious, the thought had crossed his mind that things would no longer get done.  It seemed that Hoss and Joe were handling the work, but that still left no one to do the endless paperwork…except Micah, and Ben knew he’d do it with or without Paul’s blessing.

 

“He does have my blessing,” said Paul as he entered the room.  “I wrapped his feet so he could rest them on the footrests of the chair, but I have not told him he could try to walk.  As a matter of fact, I don’t think he’d get anywhere if he tried.  They’ll be much too painful.  Now,” he said, turning to Hoss and Joe.  “You two should tell your father goodbye.  He needs his rest, especially considering he got out of bed without permission.  Hoss, Annie’s looking for you to take her home for awhile, and I think that’s a splendid idea.  She’s worked almost non-stop, and she needs rest as much as anyone.”

 

Hoss nodded and smiled sheepishly.  “Pa, don’t you be getting out that bed until Dr. Martin here tells you you can.  You’re liable to fall and hit the other side of your head on somethin’ or other.  We’ll come by and see you tomorrow.”

 

Ben nodded as Hoss and Joe left.  He waited until they were out of earshot before addressing Paul.  “How are the others?”

 

“Well, since you were brought in, we’ve gone from seven upstairs and four downstairs to only five left.  Another man has died from his burns, and another man has gone home.”  Walking to the window, Paul looked out as he shook his head.  “I don’t know what’s keeping several of them alive.  I suspect they won’t be leaving here alive.   Shiloh had been keeping their wives comfortable and fed, but when Adam took a turn for the worse, Annie took over.”  Paul watched as Ben settled into his pillow.  “You’ve got two fine, strong daughters-in-law, Ben.”

 

With his eyes closed, Ben answered, “Hm?  Yes, I know.”

 

Joe peeked into the bedroom, and watched as Shiloh bathed Adam’s naked body in cold water, trying to keep his fever at bay. With the double doors open to a balcony overlooking the pasture and stables, a constant breeze was blowing in and over his damp body resulting in a cooling effect.  He stepped back as Ming Lin brushed by him with another bucket, pouring clean water into a bowl and exchanging the one Shiloh was using for the fresh one.

 

“Shiloh?” Joe said quietly.  When she glanced up, Joe sucked in a breath at the fine lines on her forehead and around her mouth and the dark circles under eyes that were dull and surrounded by red where she’d been rubbing them.  He went to her, but she gave him no acknowledgment other than a quick glance as she continued to cool her husband.  Joe took her hands, removing the cloth and handing it to Ming Lin, who stepped in when Joe pulled Shiloh away.

 

She tried to push his hands away as she objected.  “Joe, I have to keep him cool.”

 

“Ming Lin will take over for a little while,” he answered as he moved an arm around her waist and forced her toward the door.

 

“Mr. Cartwright,” called Ming Lin, moving the cloth back to the bowl and setting it aside.  “Would you please call one of the doctors?”

 

Joe stopped at the doorway, preventing Shiloh from re-entering.  “What is it?” he asked uneasily.

 

“I believe his fever has broken.”

 

Joe turned and grabbed Shiloh’s arms and shook her as she had continued to argue against leaving her husband.  “Did you hear?” he said with a hopeful smile.  “The fever’s broken.”

 

It seemed as though she didn’t understand, her eyes were flitting back and forth.

 

“Shiloh,” he said softly, moving a hand to her cheek.  “He’s gonna be all right.”  When her tears began to flow, he pulled her into a hug and let her cry on his shoulder until she pushed herself away.

 

“Please,” she whispered.  “Would you get Paul or Annie?”

 

Joe smiled as he nodded, and by the time he reached the top of the stairs, he was yelling, “Hey Hoss!”  Running down the stairs, he continued, “Hoss!  Annie!”

 

By the time everyone rushed into the bedroom upstairs, Shiloh had covered Adam with a light sheet.  He was weakly smiling at his wife, slowly reaching up and wiping her wet face.

 

Moving a curl back away from his forehead, she leaned down, smiling back and whispering, “Please don’t do that again,” after which she laid her head on his chest and had a good cry.

 

Chapter Seventeen

Adam was up early and finding things just weren’t going to be the same for awhile. First, Shiloh was already up, being absent from the bed. Next, it was too quiet, and lastly, he had no idea how he was going to bathe, shave and dress with one good hand. He simply stopped and watched as Shiloh swept into the room, carrying Abel on one side and holding a stack of cloths she used as diapers in the other hand.

She lay the baby in the middle of the bed, side-stepped her naked husband, and began to put the diapers away in a chest in the nursery. When she came out she asked, “What are you doing out of bed?” while propping her fisted hands on her hips.

“I thought I’d bathe and shave. I feel too good to be stuck in bed,” he replied with a sheepish smile.

“And did you ask Paul?”

“I don’t need Paul to tell me how good I feel.” He looked down at Abel, who was grunting while earnestly trying to push himself over on his stomach.

“Hmf. You just remember you said that,” said Shiloh.

Adam didn’t really hear her last remark. He had furrowed his brow and wore a smile that went crooked as he watched his son struggle to turn over. It was a slow process as Abel’s foot kept slipping on the sheet, but eventually, he squealed with delight as he very slowly rolled. Adam’s eyebrows when up and his mouth flew open, and when Abel lifted his head just enough to see his father’s face, he buried his head back down in the sheets and made a guttural squeal as he vigorously kicked his legs, causing him to slightly rock forward and back.

Shiloh stood back, covering her mouth with her hand as she watched Adam slowly sit on the side of the bed and tease Abel. She didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Abel had been turning over since before the fire, and Adam had missed it until now.

“You know,” she said, appearing next to Adam and stroking his shoulder and back. “Maybe a little confinement will do you good. Abel’s been doing that,” she said, moving her chin toward the baby, “for a little while now…and you’ve just noticed.”

Adam’s eyes turned down with the corners of his mouth as he looked sadly at his son. “Have I missed that much?”

Cocking her head, Shiloh pushed her lips out in thought. She could say something to make him feel worse than he did, or she could say something encouraging. She had no desire to make him feel worse than what she could read on his face, but she still wanted him to take all those things that had been said during his illness to heart, whether he’d heard them or not. She sat down on the side of the bed next to him and lifted Abel into a sitting position on her lap.

Abel held his head up, though it wobbled.

“Adam,” she started, looking sympathetically into his eyes. “We almost lost everything important to us, and the reason that almost happened is because you have been trying to do too much. I understand what drives you. You’re always looking to make things more productive and efficient.” She shrugged. “I think because you juggle so many things, you’ll never give yourself a chance to finish anything…or find that one thing that will satisfy you. Well, I have an answer for that,” she said, moving Abel to Adam’s lap. “You created this, and he’s a long way from finished, but I assure you, if you put all that energy into raising him up right, you’ll be more satisfied than you can possibly imagine.”

Leaning into her, he kissed her head, then moved to her lips, and with his forehead touching hers, he asked, “When did you become so wise?”

She met his eyes. “When I lost you. I lost you months ago, Adam. This last…thing…almost made it permanent.”

Looking down at his son, Adam said, “Then I do need to get back to it. I’ll have to hire a timber supervisor, and I’ll talk to Pa about handling the business end of the ranch. Maybe I can handle the Ponderosa business at the same time I have to be in San Francisco for Slater and Cartwright.”

Shiloh chuckled and shook her head. “It’s a start. Now, why don’t I prepare your bath. Do you remember Paul said not to get your bandages wet?” she asked while lifting Abel to his feet and waiting for Adam to wrap an arm around him.

Grinning at his son, he peeked around him. “Mm hm.”

As Shiloh prepared the tub in the wash room, she spoke loudly for Adam to hear. “Robert is on his way here to help you with the drawings that will be coming due. Evelyn is staying behind. It seems little Robbie has been ill, and he’s not getting over it very fast.”

Adam stuck his tongue in his cheek, then looked at his son. “Did you hear that? I’ll bet that was her idea.”

Abel blew out, vibrating his lips, and then gurgling a laugh at the sound, making the corner of Adam’s mouth turn up. Unfortunately, he couldn’t lift the baby with one hand, so he was stuck where he was until Shiloh came back in the room.

When she did, she took Abel and nodded toward the wash room. “Your bath is ready. Be careful not to get your hand wet, and call me if you need me,” she said, reaching up to touch his face.

“And where will you be?” he said, standing and smiling down at her.

She in turn smiled dotingly down at her son. “It’s time to feed him. I’ll be in the nursery.”

Shiloh was just putting Abel to bed when she heard a frustrated growl from Adam. She started toward the bedroom but stopped and looked back at the baby, smiling and deciding to take him with her. After all that had happened and all that had been said, she would be placing Abel in front of his father as much as possible to prevent Adam from missing the changes he would otherwise never have a chance to see.

Sitting on the side of the bed with his trousers half way up, Adam closed his eyes and moved his hand back through his hair.

“Takes two hands, huh?” she said, giggling as she placed Abel in the middle of the bed with a small cloth doll Ming Lin had given her shortly after she mentioned the baby had become fussy, especially during feeding. The doll spent most of the time in Abel’s mouth.

Adam raised an eyebrow, giving her a severe look that made her giggle all the more as she went to the wardrobe.

“Which shirt would you like to wear today?” she asked as she regarded a black one and pushed it aside.

He had turned to watch Abel after hearing him sort of hum as he gnawed the head of the doll, pull it from his mouth to observe it closely, and then wave it about before it went back in his mouth. Adam laughed and leaned over his son, tickling his stomach. A noisy conversation ensued between father and son, with Abel alternately squealing and babbling at his father, and Adam making faces back amid his laughter.

Cocking her head, she watched, inwardly hoping he wouldn’t slowly slide back into constant work. Patiently, she prompted, “Adam?”

“Your choice,” he answered without looking up or noticing her changed mood. He was too busy marveling at his son as the child slowly lost his battle against sleep.

She pulled out a red shirt, her favorite, then slowly put it back. She hadn’t noticed he was now watching her.

When she pulled out a white shirt, he smiled. “What are you up to?”

She glanced up at him as she presented him with his shirt. “I would normally deny that I was up to anything, but I don’t have time. Robert will be here today on the noon stage.”

He eyed her as she helped him with his shirt.

“Sweetheart, can you button your shirt with one hand?”

He smiled down at her, only slightly, as he cocked his head and narrowed his eyes.

Patting his chest after catching his tolerant look, she watched as he buttoned his shirt, giving him a smile when he had finished. “All right, let’s get your pants up.”

He quickly moved his hand around the back of her neck with his thumb around the front and pulled her into him, applying pressure under her chin and lifting her face up to his.

Sucking in a shuddering breath through her open mouth, she let it back out when she felt his thumb gently move down her neck as he moved close and lightly touched her lips with his.

“You’re still afraid of me,” he whispered.

“I trust you with my life,” she whispered back.

He moved his arm around her. “But you don’t trust me not to hurt you.” Moving his mouth to her ear, he said, “I’m not Will Stewart. You have to let him go.”

“That’s ridiculous,” she said nervously, pushing away.

“No, it’s not,” he said softly, pulling her back. “You still have nightmares. You still cry in your sleep.”

Casting her eyes down, she pushed away again, and this time he let her go. “We don’t have time for this. Robert and the others will be here soon.” Bending, she pulled his pants up, tucked his shirt in and buttoned his fly. “Don’t move. Paul said you should wear a sling so you don’t absentmindedly try to use your hand.”

He watched her open a drawer and pull out a piece of the cloth she used for diapers, only she had cut this one bigger. Turning to his sleeping son, he said, “Is this how she makes you feel when she changes your diaper?” As she tied the sling around his neck, he said, “We’re going to talk about this…later. What others?”

She paused for a moment, then opened the sling so he could slip his arm in. “You asked Robert for references for help with Abel. Robert’s bringing several candidates with him. Now,” she said, pointing down. “Your slippers.”

When Adam looked up at her from his lowered head, she glanced at him, and when she began to turn away he pulled her into his arms and kissed her, waiting for her to respond, and when she did, his kiss was long, hungry.

“I don’t want to be afraid of you,” she cried as she clung to him.

Cupping her chin in his hand, he kissed her again. “We’ll deal with it, Sweetheart. Together.”

Chapter Eighteen

“Mr. and Mrs. Cartwright, this is Miss Renshaw, Mrs. Harper and Mrs. Gilbert. They’re here to interview for your domestic position.”

Adam held his left hand forward. “Robert, it’s good to have you here.” Turning to the women, he continued, “Ladies, Ming Lin will show you to your rooms. I’m sure you’d like to rest from your trip. We’ll have lunch in about an hour.”

They waited until the women and their valises were safely tucked away in their rooms, then moved to Adam’s office.

“Robert, can I offer you a drink, coffee, tea…lemonade?” asked Shiloh.

“Coffee, thank you, Shiloh. Adam, how’s the hand?”

Looking down at his useless, bandaged hand, Adam chuckled and held it up. “According to the doctor, it’ll be this way for a while.”

Shiloh delivered a coffee cup and asked, “Black, right?”

“Yes, thank you, Shiloh. And how is little Abel?”

“He’s doing well. Evelyn wrote that Robbie’s been ill. How is he?”

Looking long and hard into his coffee cup, Robert took a deep breath. “He has trouble breathing. He wheezes. The doctors haven’t really told us why, but nothing they do seems to make it any better. Evelyn sends her apologizes. Robbie’s illness keeps her quite busy.”

Shiloh looked over at Adam. She’d never thought about Abel getting sick, and the thought frightened her.

Both Adam and Robert saw her sudden fear. It was Robert, being the closest to her, who reacted first, taking her hand in both of his. “Shiloh, there’s no reason for you to worry. The doctors are confident they’ll find the cause.”

Calming her breathing, she managed a smile. “Yes, of course they will.”

Adam took her hand, guided her to the desk chair and set a cup of coffee in front of her. “You all right?” When she tentatively smiled and nodded, he turned back to Robert. “We’ll get this nanny business dealt with today and get to work tomorrow.”

“Well, I hope it’s not all work,” said Robert. “I had hoped we’d have time to see this wonderful ranch of yours.”

“It’s not my ranch,” said Adam, walking away. “But I’d be happy to show you.” He turned to face Robert again. “And it’s a working ranch. Are you ready for that?”

Grinning, Robert replied, “I’m looking forward to it. Will we see the burn?”

“Probably not. The last of the men who were injured…left…only a few days ago,” said Adam, watching the color drain from Shiloh’s face.

Noticing their sullen expressions, Robert gave them a sideways look, stumbling over his next words. “Well, I’m sure…he was happy to go home.”

Adam rubbed the back of his neck. “In the religious sense, not the literal.

“Oh. I’m sorry. How many men did you lose?”

“Seven,” answered Adam quietly.

***

Adam raised his glass of wine. “Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Ponderosa.”

When Ming Lin set the platter of carved roast beef on the table, Shiloh said, “Thank you, Ming Lin. You’ve outdone yourself.”

Ming Lin bowed and left.

After everyone’s plate was prepared, Adam reacquainted himself with everyone’s names. “Now, let me tell you a little about life here on this ranch. We’re twenty miles from the nearest town and the nearest doctor.”

Shiloh gave him a stern look with her nostrils flared.

Smiling, Adam covered her hand. “I’m afraid I’ve misspoken. Old habits. My brother’s wife is a doctor, a very competent doctor, and she lives in the main house only about a mile from here.”

The three women looked at each other in surprise as they had never seen a woman doctor.

“The point I’m trying to make is that you’re a long way from what you’re accustomed to. This is not civilization as you knew it in Boston or San Francisco. Even the closest town is not anything close to a big city. It’s full of miners and cowpokes, rough men with foul mouths. It’s dirty. Outside the reach of the only sheriff we have within fifty miles, there are dishonest men, murderers and Indians.”

Miss Renshaw dabbed her mouth with her napkin. May I ask, Mr. Cartwright, why you and Mrs. Cartwright live here with a small child if it’s as terrible as you describe?”

Arching a brow, Shiloh smiled expectantly at him, laughing to herself. She understood what he was trying to do, but it seemed it was failing. Still looking at him, she addressed Miss Renshaw. “We both grew up here,” she said, putting on a brilliant smile and quickly turning to Miss Renshaw. “Though there are inconveniences and dangers, the beauty of the land, the fresh air, and even the work is very satisfying.”

Miss Renshaw cocked her head and almost smiled while Mrs. Harper and Mrs. Gilbert looked disapprovingly at her. Nevertheless, she continued, “I’m sorry, Mrs. Cartwright, but I’m puzzled. From what I’ve seen of you, I can’t imagine all this would be satisfying, as you say.”

With furrowed brows, Shiloh said, “I don’t know what you mean.”

Adam lifted his wine glass and sat back in his chair, crossing his legs. “She’s talking about Isabella.”

Shiloh shivered at the way he was looking at her, the way he always looked at her when he addressed her as Isabella…the way he said the name.

Folding her hands in her lap, she dismissed the feeling. “If you’ve only seen me as Isabella, then you really have no idea how I really am. Isabella is a performance. Nothing more.”

Miss Renshaw met Shiloh’s eyes. “I hope you don’t expect me to believe that there’s nothing of yourself in your performances. They’re too…personal.”

There was a sudden silence at the table.

Turning up his glass, Adam swallowed the last of his wine hard. “Well, why don’t we start the interviews since it seems we already have. Miss Renshaw, would you come into the office. Ming Lin, would please show Mrs. Harper and Mrs. Gilbert to the sitting room and make sure they’re comfortable.”

Shiloh moved her eyes up to her husband’s as she placed her hand into the hand he offered. His eyes were slightly narrowed, and his brows were curved, though only enough that she would notice. It seemed he was feeling a bit defensive of her, and she wondered if Miss Renshaw would even be given a chance at the position.

Adam motioned both women into the office, but turned. Robert, your room is at the end of the hall upstairs to the right. Why don’t you get settled in.”

“Do you mind if I have a look around?” asked Robert. “I’m a little restless. I’d like to take a walk.”

“Stay close,” said Adam with a genuine smile. “The Ponderosa’s a big place. It’s easy to get lost.” With that, Adam entered his office and closed the door.

***

Standing with his back to Shiloh and his foot up on the hearth, Adam worked his jaw in aggravation. When he turned, he just glared at Shiloh who was sitting forward on the sofa, her back straight, her feet together and her hands jammed into her skirt between her knees. She was giving him no indication that she was going to change her mind. He pinched the bridge of his nose. “Shiloh…”

“No,” she said, crossing her arms.

Adam stepped forward. “Look,” he started after a deep calming breath. “I can understand why you don’t want Miss Renshaw, but the others came highly recommended, they have excellent references, and they have years of experience. What’s the problem?” He had walked slowly toward her, and by the time he stood in front of her, his good hand was on his hip and an eyebrow was arched.

She looked up at him, then looked away, chuckling to herself. “Do you have any idea how handsome you are when you look at me like that?”

Rolling his eyes toward the ceiling, he shook his head.

“Adam.” She grabbed at his hand, and he pulled it away, but she grabbed again and held on. “Adam,” she said, drawing him down to the sofa beside her. “These women are governesses. They are used to ruling children with an iron fist. As soon as the children can walk, they’ll be in uniforms. They’ll be afraid to get dirty.” She turned her body to him and took his hand in hers. “I want our children to be children. I want them to grow up like we did. I want them to get dirty. I want them to make mud pies. I want them to go swimming naked in the lake. I want them to have all those childhood hurts and learn from their mistakes. None of that will happen if Mrs. Harper or Mrs. Gilbert takes over.”

“What do you suggest then?” he asked unconvinced.

“I don’t know. But this is a mistake.” Moving her hand to his face, she caressed his cheek, running her thumb over his lips until he reached up and took her hand, kissing her fingers. “I want help, not a replacement. I want someone I can call a friend. I want someone who will tend our children as we would.” She pulled her hands away. “Maybe we can find someone in town.”

“Do you have any idea how long that might take out here?”

Leaning into him, she placed several light kisses on his lips. “As long as it takes. This is our son. We need to get this right.

He kissed her back, and staying close, he searched her eyes. She was right. The only one of those three women who might have fit in eventually was rejected by both of them from the start. The other two would have never lasted. He kissed her again, this time longer. “Come upstairs with me,” he whispered as he kissed her once more.

Neither of them realized the front door opened until they heard a throat clear. While Shiloh merely bowed her head, Adam turned his toward the…intruder.

“Didn’t mean to interrupt…”

Adam kissed his wife yet again, then stood. “Robert, you made it back in good time. Thank you for escorting Miss Renshaw back to town. She was adamant about catching the evening stage.”

“And the other two?”

With a half-smile, Adam smiled and shrugged. “We’ll be sending them back tomorrow.”

Clasping his hands behind his back, Robert stood surprised at the outcome of the interviews. “I don’t understand. They were the best the agency had to offer.”

Adam looked back at Shiloh, then turned back to Robert. “I know you called in some favors to get them here, but we feel they wouldn’t be very happy out here.”

“Outside of the big city?” Robert asked with smirk.

Chuckling, Adam answered, “Something like that.” He paused and lifted his hand to pinch his lower lip. “Robert, life isn’t the same out here. Our children will go to school in Virginia City. They’ll learn the work of the ranch. As Shiloh puts it, they’ll grow up like she and I did with the freedom to be children.”

“Well, old man, you realize you won’t find anyone like that at an agency, don’t you?”

“I do. But I needed to make sure Shiloh understood that.” He turned and looked down at her with his brows raised.

Her mouth slightly dropped open, letting an exasperated breath escape. “So this was all for my benefit?”

“Sweetheart,” he said, reaching for her hand and pulling her up from the sofa. “I’ve learned it’s easier to let you come to your own conclusions. Now, I’ll go give the ladies the news, and then you and I,” he said, lightly tapping Robert’s arm with his good hand, “will go take a look at where I am with the drawings.”

Chapter Nineteen

 

Standing at the bottom of the stairs, Adam yelled up, “Shiloh, it’s time to go!”  He smiled when she appeared at the rail holding Abel.

 

“Why the rush?  We have plenty of time to get them to the stage.”

 

“I thought we’d take the road by the lake.”  Even though his volume was normal, the depth of it reverberated against the polished wood of walls that soared the full height of the vaulted ceilings.  The women sitting patiently on the sofa waiting for their ride to town turned at the sound while Shiloh closed her eyes, allowing his baritone to wash over her, surrounding her and making her feel safe.

 

“I’m sorry,” she apologized.  “You didn’t tell me.”

 

Smiling at her, he said in a tone just above a whisper, “Then it is I who apologize, my love.”

 

“I just have to get Abel dressed,” she said sweetly.  “I’ll only be a moment.”  She disappeared down the hall.

 

Turning back to his guests, Adam rubbed his hands together.  “Why don’t we go out to the buggy.  By the time we’re loaded, she should be here.”

 

As he predicted, Shiloh walked out of the front door just as he helped Mrs. Gilbert into the third seat of the buggy.  Robert had stepped up into the middle seat.  Trotting up the porch steps, he kissed Abel on the head, then escorted his wife and child down.  He stopped when he realized he couldn’t hold the baby and help her up into the buggy, but before he could even begin to think about what he was going to do, Robert was at his side, taking Abel into his arms so Adam could help Shiloh into the front seat.

 

There was silence in the buggy as the passengers looked around them in awe of the beauty of the Ponderosa.  It wasn’t until the road curved close to the lakeshore that a sound was made, the first being a collective gasp.

 

Robert impatiently waited for Adam to bring the buggy to a halt, then stood and marveled at the vast body of water beyond the road.  “Adam, it’s magnificent.”

 

Mrs. Harper and Mrs. Gilbert seemed awestruck looking at each other and back.  Leaning sideways into Mrs. Gilbert, Mrs. Harper whispered, “Perhaps it’s not quite a Godforsaken place after all.”

 

The corners of Adam’s mouth barely showed a smile as he glanced at Shiloh, and in turn, she raised her hand to cover her own.  “Robert, we’ll have more time.  We have to go or we’ll miss the stage.”

 

Slowly resuming his seat, Robert replied, “Of course,” without taking his eyes off the emerald water of the lake.

 

Adam stopped the buggy up the street from the stage office just as the stagecoach pulled to a shuddering stop.  Robert got the two woman onboard as Adam purchased their tickets and while Shiloh waited with Abel in the buggy.

 

A saloon girl stood by watching from a discreet distance, her shawl wrapped around her shoulders.  She waited until Adam’s back was turned at the window of the stage office, then slowly approached the buggy, constantly aware of what Adam Cartwright was doing. She spoke so quietly Shiloh didn’t hear her at first, so she spoke a little louder.

 

“Mrs. Cartwright?”

 

Shiloh turned and regarded the woman.  “Are you talking to me?”

 

As the saloon girl took several uncertain steps toward the buggy, she continued to watch Adam.  “Mrs. Cartwright, my name is Nell.  I work down at the Delta Queen.”

 

Shiloh looked straight at the woman.  “What can I do for you, Nell?”

 

Walking to the other side of the buggy, she looked around her, then answered, “It’s not for me, you see…well, there’s a new girl at the Queen, and she doesn’t belong there.  It’s just that she couldn’t find any other work, and she has a little girl to take care of.”

 

“I don’t understand.  What is it you think I can do?”

 

“Word has it you’re looking for help to take care of the baby.”  She looked down at the child in Shiloh’s arms and smiled.  “My, he looks so much like his daddy.”

 

Shiloh stiffened.  “How do you know my husband?”

 

“Oh, it’s nothing like that,” answered Nell with wide eyes.  “It’s just that he’s…well, he’s just always real nice to us…all of us…when he comes in for a drink.  He talks to us like…well, with respect.”

 

Shiloh stifled a smile.  “Nell, why are you doing this for this girl?”

 

“Like I said, she doesn’t belong there.  She’s got a good education, and she takes real good care of her little girl.  It’s just that she lost her husband on the trip out from back east.  She had some money, and when it was gone, she sold her things.  She ran out of money, and…well, she works at the Queen to feed her little girl.  I don’t expect you to take my word for it.  Just talk to her.”

 

Taking a deep breath, Shiloh thought how angry Adam would be if she even considered hiring a saloon girl to help with Abel.  But what could it hurt to talk to the girl?  She knew Nell had taken a chance just approaching her which meant to Shiloh that she believed what she was saying.  Even if the girl wasn’t suitable as a nanny, perhaps Shiloh could help her find other work if she really wanted to get out of the saloon.

 

Once again, she looked Nell in the eye.  “Where is this girl?”

 

Nell gave her a hopeful look.  “She’s at the Queen.  Her name is Etta.”

 

Shiloh lay the baby on the seat of the buggy, keeping close watch as she stepped down.  She lifted the baby into her arms, looked toward Adam who was still standing at the ticket window, and said, “Let’s go see Etta.”

 

Adam finally got the ladies’ tickets and took them to the stage driver.  As he and Robert turned toward the buggy, Adam stopped and looked around…up the sidewalk on the other side of the street, behind him, and in front of him.  “Robert, did you see where Shiloh went?”

 

Robert looked around them.  “No, but she’s woman.  I’m sure she just went shopping.”

 

“Uh huh. You know what that means, don’t you?” Adam said with a smirk and curved brows.  Robert shook his head.  “It means we have to walk all over town looking for her.”

 

When Shiloh stopped in front of the saloon, she looked down at Abel, then looked back at Nell.

 

“Mrs. Cartwright, I’ll make sure nothing happens to you and your baby.”

 

Shiloh looked into the saloon over the batwing doors, then looked up and down the street before she pushed through.  She found herself standing in dim light surrounded by the stench of sweaty men and bad whiskey. A hush fell over the room as everyone stared at the newcomer.

 

Cosmo, the bartender leaned over the end of the bar.  “Mrs. Cartwright, Ma’am, a fine lady like yourself shouldn’t be in here.  Besides that, this ain’t no place for a baby.”

 

Smiling nervously, she said, “I’d like to speak to Etta.”

 

Standing up straight, Cosmo picked a glass up off the bar and began to wipe it with a towel.  “Rules are the same for everyone.  You wanna talk to a girl, you have to buy her a drink.”

 

Shiloh fumbled with her reticule and pulled out a five dollar gold piece. “A bottle of champagne and two glasses.”  She looked around the saloon and spotted an empty alcove.  “Over there.”

 

“Etta!” yelled Cosmos.  “You got a customer.” He called the boy over who swept and mopped the floors. “Go find Adam Cartwright.  Tell him his wife’s at the Queen.”

 

Shiloh seated herself in the alcove and waited for Etta to arrive with the bottle and glasses.  When Etta came into the alcove, Shiloh’s mouth slightly dropped open.  “Please, sit down and pour yourself a drink.”

 

Etta did as she was told.  She poured both glasses, sitting one in front of Shiloh.

 

“Thank you, but I don’t drink.  The baby,” Shiloh said, smiling.

 

“Neither do I.”

 

“How do you make any money?”

 

“I just have to sell it.  I don’t have to drink it.”

 

Folding her lips, Shiloh nodded. “I understand you have a child.”

 

Etta looked suspiciously at her.  It wasn’t unheard of for well-to-do people to take a child away from someone deemed an unfit mother.

 

“Henrietta, what happened to you?  I told you to find me in Sacramento City.”

 

Etta was puzzled.  Sacramento City seemed like such a long time ago.  She looked away, thinking.  A woman on the stagecoach came to mind.  She had offered her daughter, Rachel, a drink of water from a bottle she had gotten from the saloon at Peter’s Station.  “You’re Mrs. Cartwright.”

 

Smiling and nodding, Shiloh asked again, “Why didn’t you find me?”

 

“I tried,” said Etta, relaxing in the chair at the same time her eyes became watery.  “The people at the hotel wouldn’t let me see you, so I gave up.”

 

Reaching out to touch Etta’s hand on the table, Shiloh said, “Nell is right.  You don’t belong here.  And you’re not staying.”

 

Cosmo nodded at the man who pushed through the batwing doors.  The man stood there looking around the room, his black hat low on his forehead, a bandaged hand resting on the gun in his holster and his lips slightly pursed. He looked back at Cosmo who nodded toward the alcove.

 

Shiloh was looking down at Abel, gathering his blanket around him when Adam stepped in wearing a disapproving scowl. “Let’s go.”

 

She scowled back.  “We were just leaving.”

 

He arched an eyebrow. “We?”

 

“Mrs. Cartwright, I need this job,” pleaded Etta.

 

Standing, Shiloh replied, “You need a job, Etta, but not this one.” Glancing at Adam, she could see and feel his anger.  She just hoped he’d listen as she stepped past him. “Etta, come with me.”

 

As the two women walked toward the door closely followed by Adam, Cosmo called Etta.  “Etta, you get back to work and leave the Cartwrights alone.”

 

Without looking back, Shiloh answered, “She doesn’t work here any longer,” and continued out the door with Etta in tow.

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter Twenty

 

They had barely arrived at the buggy when Adam grabbed Shiloh by the shoulder and turned her around.  He didn’t speak immediately, but rather worked his jaw until it hurt…until he could get his fury under control.

 

Shiloh inhaled and blew out.  “Where’s Robert?”

 

Twisting his mouth, Adam answered, his voice deeper than usual. “He’s looking for you.”

 

“Good.  I have time to say what I’m going to say.”

 

Adam glared down at her, his lips drawn, his nostrils flared.

 

“I’ll tell you the whole story when we get home.  Adam, this is Henrietta Wright.  Etta, my husband, Adam Cartwright.”  With the introductions over, Shiloh turned to Adam.  “I met Etta…Henrietta…on a stage to Sacramento City.  I told her I would help her then and told her to find me, but the hotel there wouldn’t let her see me.  So I’m helping her now.”

 

Shiloh lifted Adam’s arm and passed him the baby, then turned to Etta as she pulled money out of her reticule.  “Get what you need with this money, clothes, whatever you need for both you and Rachel.  Tomorrow, take everything you own to Baldwin’s livery, and tell Elias Baldwin to bring you out to our home. I’ll pay him there.  You and Rachel will be staying with us.”

 

Looking back at Adam, she winced.  His expression hadn’t changed.  Turning back to Etta, she said, “Go now.”

 

Etta backed slowly away.  “Thank you, Mrs. Cartwright.  I won’t let you down.”

 

When Etta was out of sight, Shiloh turned back to Adam, and waited for whatever he was going to say.

 

“Get in.”  When she was seated with the baby in her arms, he said, “I’m going to find Robert.”

 

She looked away, but he cupped her chin in his hand with a firmness that made her catch her breath and glared into her eyes.  “Do not get out of this buggy.”

 

Shiloh sat in the middle seat while Robert rode up front with Adam, and that was fine with her.  Speaking with Robert about work and the sights on the Ponderosa seemed to be calming Adam down. But when they arrived at the house, he sent her to the bedroom as if she was a child.  She started to object; not to going to their bedroom, but rather being sent there, but that barely controlled fury was still in his eyes.  She turned without a word and climbed the stairs.  She fed Abel and put him to bed after which she spent her afternoon on the balcony outside the bedroom, watching Tom and Johnny exercise her horses.

 

Downstairs Robert had just finished a cursory look at Adam’s work.  “Adam, I understand the basics of what you’re doing here,” said Robert as he pored over a set of drawings at the drawing table, “but these are beyond my education.  Where do you learn this?”

 

Sitting on the corner of the desk, Adam smiled and replied, “This isn’t something that was taught in schools back east either.  I’m not even sure it’s being taught now.”  He walked to the drawing table and bent over the drawings next to Robert.  “I told you the last time I was in San Francisco.  I read, I study. Innovation starts with imagination.  Once you have an idea, you apply the math you know for structure, bearing, and stress.  It doesn’t always work out, but if we’re going to grow…to improve, we have to try.”

 

“I’m afraid I was never as passionate about architecture as you.”  Robert leaned back in the chair and looked off at nothing in particular.  “My father was.  He was just like you, always looking for some better way.  Daniel had that as well.  Me, I had the business mind.  I could always win clients over, close contracts, get financing. Don’t get me wrong, I’m quite comfortable around building plans, just not so much looking at yours.  They are impressive.”

 

Adam squeezed Robert’s shoulder.  “It’s not that hard.  You’re going to learn while you’re here.  So while I go take care of some unfinished business, why don’t you go over those drawings and do the math.  I think you might surprise yourself.”

 

“I don’t mean to stick my nose where it doesn’t belong, and if I am, please tell me, but you didn’t say where you found her.”

 

Adam’s eyes grew dark.  “She took Abel into a saloon.”

 

“Are you upset just about Abel or does that include your wife?”

 

Looking up at the ceiling, Adam replied, “Both.”

 

“Adam, she’s an intelligent woman.  I’m sure she weighed the physical danger as well as the harm such a thing could do to her reputation before she went in.  She’s been known to go headlong into a room or a crowd when she perceived something wasn’t right.”

 

“Your point?”

 

“She might make sense if you give her a chance.”

 

Adam’s mouth twisted as he gave Robert a hard look.  Pointing to the drawing table, he said, “I’ll be back down in a few minutes,” and left.

 

Stepping slowly and quietly into the bedroom, Adam stopped and looked around.  Seeing no one, he stuck his head into the nursery and found Abel sound asleep in his crib.  Looking back into the bedroom, he noticed that one side of the double doors to the balcony was cracked open.

 

He stood in front of the door, looking at her back through the glass as she watched her horses.  He noticed she had changed clothes, and was now wearing a skirt pleated in the back with a bow and a sheer white blouse designed to show off the skin not covered by exceptionally pretty under garments.   She was wearing green, his favorite color, at least one of them. It represented so much of what the Ponderosa was, what it offered, what it covered itself in each and every spring.  It was a color of freshness, of renewal.  He scowled at her choice of color, of her attempted manipulation of the situation…of him.

 

Pushing the door open, he stepped out and to one side, waiting for her to turn and motioning for her to enter the bedroom.  When she had done so, he followed her in and quietly closed the door.

 

Shiloh sat on the end of the bed waiting for whatever was about to rain down on her.  She quickly looked up at him in surprise when he said with a sarcastic smile, “You said you had a story to tell.  Tell it,” he snapped as he walked to a chair and sat down, crossing one leg over the other.

 

With one quick nod, she licked her lips.  “I was on my way to Sacramento City for my performance there.  You stayed behind to get the timber camps going for Crocker’s contract.  There was a woman and her child traveling with me.  I remember it being so very hot, and the wind coming in the windows wasn’t making a difference.  When we got to Peter’s Station, it was apparent the stage driver had no water, so…”  She bit the inside of her cheek when she realized she was about to tell her husband that today wasn’t the first time she had willingly walked into a saloon.  Rubbing her forehead with her fingers, she decided a shortcut was in order. “I asked the proprietor if he had any empty bottles, and he gave me one which I washed out and filled with water from the pump.  The woman on the stage turned it down at first, but when I explained that it was fresh water, she accepted, giving her little girl a drink first, and then drinking herself.”  Looking up at Adam, she saw no change in his eyes, so she continued. “We had nothing to do but talk, so we did.  She said she had gotten as far as Virginia City on her own after her husband died in a flash flood halfway through their trip west from Boston.  They’d heard there was land to be had for the taking and riches beyond compare.  He left them in the wagon when it got stuck in the rushing water…and he never came back.”  She didn’t look at him, but she heard the breath he let out.  “He was going to be a teacher.”  She paused, remembering what she felt that day, wondering how many husband’s just didn’t come back to the wagon on the grueling trip out west.  “To make matters worse, his family wanted nothing to do with her or her child.  They blamed her for their son’s death, saying she took him away from them.  She had no family, so it was just her and her daughter.  Her husband’s family did send the things they left behind to Sacramento City, and that’s why she was on the stage.  She was going to send what she could back to Virginia City and sell the rest.  The rest of the story you know.”  Shiloh looked sadly over at Adam who was rubbing his chin.  The fury in his eyes had faded, if only little.  She bowed her head, looking at her hands and finished softly.  “And I…forgot about her.  Until today.”

 

They sat in silence for awhile until Adam broke it.  “How did you happen to go into the Delta Queen?”  he asked in a monotonously even tone.

 

Taking a deep breath, she answered, “A woman named Nell spoke to me while I was waiting in the buggy.  She asked me to help a young woman who was working there to feed her child.  She said the woman didn’t belong there.  I don’t know why I believed her. Maybe it was because I felt she was putting herself at risk by talking to me…because of the way she was watching you,” she said, looking Adam in the eye.  “She was afraid of you seeing her talk to me.”

 

Standing, Adam moved in front of her and glared.  “Do you have any idea what could have happened to you and Abel in that saloon?”

 

She took a quick look at his face.  It seemed nothing she said had made a difference in his foul mood. When she stood up, he didn’t move, resulting in them standing chest to chest, or rather her chest to his stomach.

 

“I thought about it, yes.  But Nell assured me she would make sure there was no trouble, and as it happened, I was left alone.  The bartender knew who I was, so I was fairly sure he wasn’t going to let anything happen.  The most the patrons did was stare, and after I entered the alcove they went back to whatever they were doing before I got there.”  She looked up at him and narrowed her eyes in annoyance.  “Except of course, for whoever sent for you.”

 

She sidestepped him and walked away, crossing her arms, then spun around.  “I do believe we’ve already had the rest of this conversation.”

 

Adam’s brow was furrowed, his nostrils were flared, and his mouth was turned in a heated frown.  “What are you talking about?” he asked, almost yelling.

 

She did yell.  “San Francisco.  After I placed my land bid when you left before my first performance.  Specifically, who decided a woman couldn’t go into a saloon and have a cold beer on a hot day?  A man.  When do women get to decide for themselves?”

 

He approached her and pointed his finger. “Not. Today.  And let me remind you that you weren’t alone.  You were carrying my son.”

 

Pushing his hand away, she moved a hand to her hip, and walked away. “You’re impossible,” she said in a biting tone.

 

“There’s no point in discussing this anymore until we’ve both calmed down.  I’ll come get you when dinner is ready.” He opened the bedroom door, but stopped when she spoke.

 

“You’re confining me to the bedroom?” she said, her voice ramping as she spoke.  “I am not a child.”

 

“Then stop acting like one,” he said through gritted teeth.  He continued out the door and closed it behind him, leaving her seething.

 

Chapter Twenty-One

 

Robert was engrossed in the particulars of the drawings, furiously working out the equations that supported Adam’s design on paper when Adam entered the office.

 

He looked over Robert’s shoulder and smiled.  “Looks like you’re making some progress.”

 

“You know, Adam, you were right,” Robert responded without taking his eyes off the drawings.  “This is intriguing,” he said, continuing with his calculations.

 

“Don’t let me interrupt then.  I have some things to do.  If you need anything, ask Ming Lin.”

 

Robert only nodded, having become immersed again in the work.

 

Quietly leaving the office, Adam went to the entry table for his gun, wrapped the belt around his hips, and tied the string that held the holster to his leg. With his hat on his head, he glanced up to the top of the stairs wearing a frown, then left.

 

Shiloh watched from the washroom window as he rode away.  She knew Robert was still in the house.  Adam was alone, probably just going for a ride as he had done in the past after an argument.  She closed her eyes, and as she let out a slow breath, the tension in her shoulders eased.

 

The balcony called to her.  From the right side, she could see the lake in all its afternoon splendor, but she gave it only a passing look.  She would stay in the bedroom if Adam was still in the house, having no desire to see him at the moment, but he left.  Why should she stay?  She’d normally play her piano, but she didn’t want disturb Robert.  “Horses.  I haven’t spent any decent amount of time with my horses since Abel was born.”  Smiling and wagging her head, she went back inside and dressed for the stable.

 

Before she left, she stopped by the office.  “Robert, do you have everything you need?”

 

He was so consumed by whatever he was doing, that he merely grunted.  Before she left the house, she asked Ming Lin to take their guest a cup of coffee.

 

***

 

Adam had shown no interest in seeing the burned area around the mine, but that’s where he found himself.  There were two horses ground tied near the entrance of the shaft, but he wasn’t concerned.  He recognized the horses.  Walking to the place where the powder house had once stood, he picked up a charred piece of wood.  From the look of it, it was a piece of a powder barrel.  Tossing it aside, he squatted and drew a finger along a black line burned into the rock, the line Chuck Evans found.

 

“Adam, it’s good to see you out,” came a familiar voice.

 

Standing as two men approached, Adam replied, “Roy, what brings you back out here?” as he offered his left hand.

 

Roy first extended his right hand.  “Well, I guess that wouldn’t do, now would it?”

 

Adam laughed.  “Roy…Chuck, why are you back out here?  Did you find something?”

 

“Well, Adam, Micah sent word for Chuck here to go see him,” explained Roy.  “It seems that Ralston fella with the Bank of California stopped by the house and made an offer on the mine. Thought that was a might suspicious considerin’ what just happened.”

 

“Micah sent me to get Sheriff Coffee.  We thought we’d see if anyone had been here,” said Chuck.

 

“And?”

 

Chuck turned and pointed.  “Someone’s been here.  There’s fresh dirt turned over in front of the shaft and fresh footprints inside.”

 

“Anything else?” Adam asked.

 

“No,” answered Roy.  “But you can bet I’ll be watching Ralston.”

 

Nodding, Adam turned and mounted.  “Let me know if you find anything.” He pulled the reins to leave, then reined Sport all the way around. “Roy, have you heard anything about Holman?”

 

“Not exactly. At least not anything you’d wanna to hear.”  Roy answered Adam’s raised brows.  “A marshal was sent to Utah Territory.  He hasn’t been heard from in a while, so another marshal’s been sent to find him.”

 

“And chances are he’ll disappear, too.  What then, Roy?” asked Adam as he looked out over the remnants of forest around them.

 

Roy bristled.  “I just don’t know.”

 

***

 

After bedding down Sport in the barn, Adam went directly to the office.  Robert had moved to the desk and was holding a sheet of paper covered in scribblings in one hand and a cup of coffee near his lips in the other.

 

“Ah, Adam.  You’re back.  Ming Lin came in just a few minutes ago to say that supper would be ready soon.”

 

“Like clockwork,” said Adam, chuckling. “I’ll go upstairs and get Shiloh and Abel.”

 

Still studying his figures, Robert said, “She’s not there.  She left.  Something about her horses.”

 

Sucking in his cheeks, Adam forced a smile.  “Then I’m going down to the stables.”

 

He walked instead of taking Sport, hoping the walk down the hill would calm him. It did somewhat…enough to keep a civil tongue in his head.  After all, they were about to sit down to dinner with a guest.  He was not about to argue through it or have her slam doors before. He stayed back when he found her with Cotton and Eli in side-by-side stalls.

 

She stroked Cotton’s nose, holding Abel close, talking softly to him about the horse.

 

Never had he doubted her love of their child.  But she had sometimes been reckless before Abel arrived.  And now she had been reckless with him in her arms.  No matter how she looked now…so loving, so lovely…she had to be made to understand.

 

“Shiloh.”

 

She raised her head, but didn’t look.  She could hear his footsteps drawing closer, hard and purposeful, which meant he was going to pick up where they left off.  She had no intention of sparring with him in front of Abel.  She had thought of the probability that he wouldn’t either.

 

“I asked you to stay at the house,” he said rather stiffly.

 

She chuckled.  “Is that the way you remember it?”

 

Adam breathed deeply.  “Supper’s almost ready.  And we have a guest.”

 

She kissed Abel on the head and passed him to Adam.  “Why don’t you start up?  I need to speak to Tom.  I’m starting Cotton’s training tomorrow.”

 

Raising his chin, Adam sized her up.  “You haven’t ridden since Abel’s birth.  You haven’t even tried to sit a horse.”

 

“I hadn’t really thought I would just yet, but since you brought it up, I think I should sit in a saddle even if we just…sit…in one place.  No point in putting it off.  But it won’t be an untrained horse.  It will be Spirit.  As far as Cotton goes, it’s all ground training at this point.”

 

Adam turned and walked away from her down the middle of the stable toward the door, speaking as he went.  “We’ll talk about it later.”

 

It was only another fifteen minutes when Shiloh walked into the dining room from the kitchen after cleaning up just as Adam and Robert were sitting down at the table.

 

“Abel?”

 

Nodding toward the sitting area, Adam answered, “He’s in the cradle asleep.”

 

She took a deep breath as she looked at the table with Adam in his customary place at the head and Robert to his right.  She went to her normal place at Adam’s left and seated herself.  Both men waited for her to be seated, then sat themselves.

 

As Adam poured wine for all of them, Shiloh put on a bright smile.  “Robert, what had you so intrigued in the office today?”

 

“Did you know your husband has a brilliant mind?” said Robert as he prepared his plate.  He hesitated for a fleeting moment as he watched the incredulous look Shiloh gave her husband.  “Well, when it comes to architecture.”

 

“Yes, he does have an active imagination,” she answered with a quick smile.

 

Through the rest of dinner, most of the conversation centered around Adam’s drawings.  Shiloh politely listened, skipped dessert, and excused herself to the nursery when Abel announced he was hungry.  She spent the rest of the evening there, rocking him even though he had almost immediately fallen asleep after his meal.  She wasn’t looking forward to the remainder of the night when Adam came up, but she felt somewhat shielded with Abel in her arms.

 

Adam sat in the wing chair in front of a low fire, a fire just big enough to keep the house comfortable during nights that were still chilly.  Robert had already retired for the evening, leaving Adam alone with his thoughts…thoughts he had put off most of the day.  Turning his glass of brandy around in his hand, he thought back to a time before they were married when she would do the exact opposite of what he’d advise.  Maybe he should have had a little more faith in her ability to handle things back then.  But this time, she involved Abel who depended on her for his safety.  He looked up from his glass and breathed deeply, realizing his anger was all about Abel.  Rising from his chair, he drank the last of his brandy, set the glass on a table, and climbed the stairs.

 

Shiloh sat watching Abel dream.  His eyes were moving underneath his eyelids, and every now and then he’d suck in some quick breaths and pout or smile.  Her head snapped up when Adam entered the room as if he was on a mission, but he stopped and smiled at the sight of his wife with their child in her arms.

 

Sitting at the end of the bed, he propped his arm on the top of the footboard and pinched the bridge of his nose while Shiloh turned her attention back to Abel.  “Shiloh, do you have any idea how I knew you were at the Delta Queen?”

 

“Someone went to get you, obviously.”

 

“Cosmo sent for me the minute he knew you were planning to stay.  I’m betting he warned you about staying.”

 

“Yes, he did, sort of,” she said calmly.  “I had Nell’s assurances, though.”

 

Taking a deep breath, Adam moved his elbows to his thighs and let his hands hang between his legs.  “Nell and the other girls can’t stop bullets.”

 

“I’m aware of that.  But there were no bullets flying, and it appeared there wasn’t going to be.”

 

He looked up at her from under his brow.  “All it takes is one man who’s had one too many drinks, one poker hand that seems too good to be true, or one miner who thinks another miner jumped his claim for guns to be drawn, and it happens in a split second all the time.”

 

“If it’s that dangerous, maybe you should stop going into saloons, Adam,” she replied, looking him straight in the eye.

 

Tilting his head to one side, he wore the slightest smile.  “There’s the difference.  I would never take our son into one.  I have a choice.  You had a choice.  He didn’t.  His welfare is in our hands.”

 

She looked away.  “I didn’t start the day planning to go into the Delta Queen with or without Abel today, nor do I plan to do so in the future.”  Standing, she carried Abel to the nursery where she gently laid him in his crib.  She walked past Adam and went into the washroom, removing her riding skirt and shirt followed by her corset.

 

When Adam entered the room, she took no notice until he took her by the wrist and gently backed her into a wall, stepping into her.

 

“I would appreciate it if you would stop treating me like a child,” she spat. “I know I do things you would prefer I didn’t, but just because I do, that does not mean I’m acting like a child.  I’m acting like…the woman you married,” she said with wide, angry eyes.

 

“You’re impetuous, Shiloh.  You can’t be that way with a child who depends on you to keep him safe.”

 

She looked away. “You can try to confine me to the bedroom, but you can bet I won’t stay here.”

 

“Stubborn,” he said, his eyes twinkling.

 

“Are we playing with the pot and kettle again?”

 

Pressing his nose against her cheek, he said softly, “Don’t do it again.  Promise.”

 

She hadn’t looked at him yet, though he was sorely trying to get her to acquiesce by distraction.  “I promise I won’t take Abel into another saloon.”

 

“And,” he breathed into her ear.

 

“I’m not going to make a promise I might not be able to keep.”

 

He stopped nibbling her ear, and looked into her bright, clear eyes, his mouth slightly puckered and his brows gently curved.

 

“You never know when I might want that cold beer,” she said, her smile turning into a closed-mouth chuckle which made his nostrils flare in his attempt not to join her.  But when she tiptoed and pressed her lips to his, she knew he was going to fail, that it would only be until her fingers began to work on his buttons that he gave in.  They’d had a physical void in their marriage far too long for him to resist now.

 

Chapter Twenty-Two

 

Adam lay on the edge of consciousness with a smile on his lips.  He didn’t have to open his eyes to recognize the warmth and softness of a woman pressed against him.  They had enjoyed a closeness that was as satisfying as it was different.  Now, he tightened his arms around her as if he could pull her closer.

 

She didn’t move.  She was still sound asleep.

 

He thought about their night.  The last time, she had been apprehensive about what to expect after Abel’s difficult birth, and ultimately they had been interrupted by the fire, but tonight, there was no hesitation on her part until they both realized her concerns were valid. Still, she was adamant about trying, so after some trial and error both were finally comfortable.

 

He kissed her forehead, smiling again at his memories of the night.  When he moved over her, kissing his way down her neck to her shoulders and beyond, she moaned and moved her hands to his head, running her fingers through his soft curls.  His lips kept coming back to hers as her hands searched for something to grasp.  They settled on his shoulders, and finally as he let a long, warm breath escape his mouth, her hands relaxed, and the two lovers lay in each other’s arms completely winded.

 

For awhile, they stayed where they were, enjoying the entanglement of their bodies, skin pressed against skin garnered its own pleasurably sensual feeling.  Shiloh broke the silence when she whispered in his ear, “I’ve missed you,” as she lightly moved the tips of her fingers up and down his back.  She thought the deep moan that reverberated from his chest into hers was all she would get out of him, but he suddenly raised his head, kissing her deeply, and then slowing down and taking his time, enjoying the soft fullness of her lips.

 

He stopped and looked happily into her eyes for a moment before he kissed her again, moving down her chin and back up.  “I think we should do this more often.”

 

“Fight and make up?” she asked, giggling as he tickled her neck with his tongue.

 

“No,” he said adamantly without looking up.  “Just the last part.”

 

“Well, at least we know how to deal with my hips. Who’d have thought pillows could be that useful?”

 

“You did…for Micah, but did you notice we didn’t need them the second time?”

 

She thought for a moment and realized she was feeling no pain.  She didn’t have much time to let that sink in as Abel’s cries came earlier than usual.  She kissed his nose, and then his mouth.  “Are you going to let me up?”

 

“No,” he said begrudgingly as he lightly bit her chin.  “You stay put.  I’ll bring him to you.” Moving his arms from around her, and carefully untangling his legs, he pushed himself up off the bed.  He stopped for a moment on the way to the nursery and turned to look at her.

 

She lay the way he’d left her, her prurient gaze, the rise and fall of her breasts with each breath, the smooth perfection of her lightly damp skin calling him back to her.

 

Biting his lip, he remembered those days on their honeymoon when they never left the bed, except to answer the door when they ordered food. His head snapped back toward the nursery when Abel’s cries became more insistent.  Smiling, he continued into the nursery, thinking those days of carefree debauchery were over.  By the time he returned with Abel, Shiloh was sitting against the headboard with a pillow behind her.

 

He passed the baby to her, then said, “Lean up so I can sit behind you.”  She gave him a wide-eyed stare and bit her lip to which he smiled. “I’d like to see him from your perspective.”  Once seated with Shiloh sitting between his legs and her back against his chest, he moved his arms around hers as she cradled Abel.

 

Abel knew exactly what he wanted, straining to lift his head and grunting until his father lifted him close enough to latch on.

 

His furious sucking made Adam quietly laugh. “He reminds me of the drunks in town getting their first bottle of whiskey for the day.  They can’t wait to get it in their mouths.”  When Shiloh blushed, Adam bent his head next to hers.  “You weren’t blushing earlier.”

 

Closing her eyes, she replied, “Yes, I was.  It was just too dark for you to see.”  She sat quietly for a moment, her head turned to see Adam’s face.  Father and son were looking at each other much like she and Abel did while he nursed. “Adam?”

 

Distracted, Adam grunted, “Mm hm?”

 

Every now and then, Abel would let go and smile up at his father, then take on a serious look with his little brows furrowed as he searched for the nipple.

 

“Are you comparing yourself to a drunk?” she asked impishly.

 

An eyebrow quickly arched as Adam stuck his tongue in his cheek to hide his smile. “How long does this usually take?” he asked as he slowly slid from behind her.

 

“It depends on how hungry he is.  How hungry are you my sweet baby?” she asked, bending close to Abel and smiling.

 

Abel reached up and touched her face which caused Adam to take pause at the tenderness of it.  His surprise settled into a warm smile.  If he had ever had any doubts about Shiloh’s abilities at motherhood, they were surely just swept away.

 

As both were dressing for their day, Shiloh helping where required, Adam brought up the subject of Etta.  “We’re expecting another guest today.  What do you intend to do with Mrs. Wright?”

 

“I intend to hire her to help with Abel,” she answered as she checked herself in the mirror.

 

Adam stopped what he was doing. “You spoke to her only briefly on a stagecoach. How do you know she’s qualified?  How do you know she can be trusted?”

 

She spun around and smiled.  After the way their day had started, she was bound and determined not to spoil it now.  “It was more than a brief conversation.  I also got to see her take care of her own child.”

 

Stepping into the washroom to brush his hair, Adam asked, “How old is the child?”

 

“Well,” Shiloh said a little louder to be heard from the bedroom, “Rachel was four when I met them, so she could be five now.”

 

Adam leaned through the washroom door.  “Five is not an infant.”

 

She laughed.  “Don’t be silly.  She didn’t come into this world a five-year-old.”  She glanced his way while she pulled her hair back and pinned it.  She was sure about hiring Etta, but he hadn’t even spoken to her.  “Why don’t the two of you talk…alone?  I’ll occupy Rachel in the kitchen while you do.”

 

He appeared behind her and wrapped his arms around her, leaning in and kissing her cheek.  “I think that’s a good idea.  Now, we need to get downstairs.  Robert’s an early riser.”

 

She gave him an incredulous look.  “Earlier than us?”

 

“This morning, definitely,” he said, chuckling.

 

***

 

Adam trotted down the stairs whistling, thinking there was nothing that could possibly spoil this day.  It had started so well, and he wasn’t about to look backward.

 

Robert had already arrived at the breakfast table and was enjoying a cup of coffee as he read the notes Adam had written while he was developing his drawings.

 

“Robert, good morning.  How’d you sleep?” asked Adam, pouring himself a cup of coffee.

 

Studying Adam as he dumped spoon after spoon of sugar in his coffee, Robert smiled and nodded at length.

 

Adam noticed and stopped what he was doing. Both men slowly grinned at each other, then resumed their coffee.

 

“Glad it’s all settled,” said Robert.

 

“It’s not.  At least not quite.  A young woman is coming today for the nanny job.”

 

“You’ve already hired her?  When did you have time to do that?”

 

Taking a deep breath, Adam wagged his head. “Shiloh seems to think so.  I haven’t spoken to her yet.”  Hearing Shiloh coming down the stairs, Adam shook his head and nodded toward Shiloh.

 

Robert acknowledged by returning the nod as he pushed his lower lip up.

 

Both men stood, and it was Adam who pulled Shiloh’s chair out for her. “Here,” he said, taking Abel.  “I’ll put him in the cradle.”

 

By the time Adam came back to the table, Ming Lin had brought bacon, eggs, biscuits, potatoes, fruit and all the condiments that could possibly go with breakfast.

 

“Robert, do you feel up to riding with me this morning?” Adam asked as he carefully prepared his plate with his left hand.

 

“Where do you ride?”

 

“Oh, over to Pa’s to go over the work for the day, then over to the Flying W to go over the work for the day.  After that it depends on the work list.  I’ll be discussing some changes with Pa this morning,” he said, winking at Shiloh, drawing a smile from her as she split open his biscuit, spreading it with apricot jam. “The truth is, Robert, I’ve got to let go of some of the work around here.  Working for an architectural firm is why I went to college.  It’s time for me to use all that education.”

 

“I thought that’s what you’re doing,” said Robert just before he bit into a piece of bacon.

 

“It is.  But I’m still doing as much around the ranch as I always have.”

 

Shiloh smiled.  That’s not true.  You’re doing more.  We have more timber contracts than we’ve ever had.  And then there’s the mine.  Oh, and don’t forget the extra work because Micah and Hoss were incapacitated.”

 

Adam raised his brows as he looked over at Robert.

 

“Oh,” said Shiloh, smiling at Adam.  “And let’s not forget you are a father now.”

 

It was Robert’s turn to raise his eyebrows and give Adam a quick nod.  “That alone should be occupying a good majority of your time.  They grow much too fast to put it off.”

 

Moving his lips into a straight line, widening his eyes and curving his brows, Adam wagged his head.  “I understand that.  But I can’t just walk away from my responsibilities until I make sure they’re taken care of.”  He pointed his fork at Shiloh.  “And you, my love, are just going to have to understand that I can’t completely walk away.”  When she frowned deeply, he cocked his head and crooked his jaw, then continued.  “I will delegate more of the physical work, Shiloh, but I’ll still have to oversee some things.  And if there’s major construction required, I’ll be more involved.”

 

Slowly placing her fork carefully on the side of her plate, she turned away as she slowly chewed her last bite.  It seemed to her that nothing or at least not much was going to change, and she’d be raising their son on her own.  She was about to say that last part out loud, when he covered her hand.

 

“Sweetheart, I promise you, I won’t be out until dark and then come home and disappear into the office.  When it’s bedtime, we will be retiring together.  We’ll have dinner together, and we’ll have time for us and Abel.  I just have to get it all in place.  And the first hurdle to doing all this is talking Pa into hiring a foreman.”

 

She looked back at him with big, blue round eyes.  “You know what Pa will say.  He’ll say either Hoss or Joe can do that, and then Hoss or Joe…or both of them, will come to you, and then you’ll be as involved as ever,” she finished with a short glare before she picked up her coffee cup.

 

“I’ve already spoken to Hoss, and he’s in agreement with me.  He and Annie would like to start a family.  And Joe doesn’t have the experience to run all the different parts of the ranch.  He’s not fond of constant work, anyway.”

 

“What about Pa?  What if he decides he’ll fill the void you leave?”

 

Adam glanced up at Robert, then back to her.  “I don’t think he wants to do that at this point.  We’ll just have to occupy his time with his grandchildren,” he said with a smile.  “Now, I need to head out to Pa’s and the Flying W this morning.  When are you expecting Etta?” he asked, nodding at her plate.

 

She picked up her forked and stabbed a potato.  “I’m sure it will be sometime this morning.  If you’re not here, I’ll keep her occupied until you can speak with her.”

 

Adam knew she wasn’t happy, so after Robert stepped out the front door, he lingered, giving his wife more than a peck on the lips.  With his arms tightly around her, she wasn’t going anywhere, so she looked up into his eyes, eyes that were laughing down at her.

 

She scowled.

 

“I’ll have none of that, young lady,” he said, touching her nose with his finger, something that made her think of his father.  “When are you going to learn to trust me?”

 

She breathed in heavily, drawing his eyes to her décolletage. “Haven’t you seen enough of that today?” she asked, narrowing her eyes.

 

With a puckish grin, he answered, “I am a man.”  He quickly kissed her one more time before he stepped through the door, saying as he went, “Trust me.”

 

Chapter Twenty-Three

 

When Adam and Robert got to the main house, Pa was already at the desk going through the paperwork of those things that had priority on the work list.  It would be up to Hoss, Adam and himself to get things done since Joe was already off on a cattle drive.

 

Opening the front door, Adam yelled, “Anybody home?”

 

“Over here, Son.”

 

As they walked around the corner, it took a moment for Ben to look up, and when he saw Robert, he stood.

 

“Pa, this is my partner, Robert Slater.  Robert, my father.”

 

The two men shook hands.  “Well, Mr. Slater, Adam and Shiloh both have told me a lot about you and your family.”

 

“I hope all good, Mr. Cartwright.  Please call me Robert.”

 

Ben smiled and nodded.  “Can I offer you something to drink…maybe coffee?”

 

“No thank you, Mr. Cartwright.  We just finished breakfast.  Adam was kind enough to allow me to tag along to see what work a ranch like this commands.”

 

All of them looked toward the stairs as Hoss came down and walked directly over to the desk.

 

“Robert, my brother Hoss,” said Adam.

 

Hoss shook Robert’s hand.  “And you must be Mr. Slater from San Francisco.  Shiloh mentioned to my wife you’d be coming out to help Adam with his drawin’s.”

 

“I’m afraid I won’t be much use other than to just do what he tells me,” said Robert.  “You have quite a talented architect here for a son, Mr. Cartwright.  You must be very proud of him.”

 

Ben’s smile was subdued.  “Yes, of course.  Now, why don’t we get started?  We have a lot to go over.”

 

“Pa, I don’t know why you think we have to discuss anything,” said Hoss.  “Dr. Martin told you to take it easy for a while.  You ain’t even been home but for a week.”

 

Ben scowled and sat down behind the desk.  “Hoss, I don’t have time to do what Paul Martin suggests.  This work will never get done.”

 

“Pa, me and Joe and Micah already went over the work while you were still over at Adam’s.  Everything that needs to get done is gettin’ done.  Ain’t no need to go over it again.”

 

Robert cleared his throat.  “If you gentlemen will excuse me, I think I’ll go enjoy the morning on the front porch.  Excuse me”, he said, giving them a quick nod and making a hasty exit.

 

Adam winced as he watched Robert go.  When he heard the front door latch, he turned back to his father.  “This is probably the best time to bring this up.  Pa, we need to hire a foreman.”

 

Ben harrumphed and sat back in his chair as he tossed a stack of papers on his desk.

 

“Here me out, Pa.”   Adam didn’t wait for his father to answer.  He sat forward on the edge of his chair and continued.  “I just don’t have the time I had before Slater and Cartwright and before Abel came along.  I haven’t spent much time with him or Shiloh, and he’s already pushing himself over.  And what about Hoss and Annie starting a family?  When are they going to have time?”

 

Ben stuttered, “We…we just need to let things settle down.  We have an unusual amount of injuries this year with Hoss and Micah, and now your hand.”

 

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Adam braced himself for the fight he knew was about to come.  “Pa, it’s not going to get any better.  Micah has a long way to go.  Hoss and Annie are gonna start a family sooner or later.  That leaves Joe and you, and you handle the paperwork.  That’s a job in itself.”

 

“And just where do you think you’re going to find someone we can trust who’s going to keep this all together?” Ben said, glaring at his oldest son.

 

“He doesn’t have to handle everything.  All he has to do is make sure the men are doing what they’re supposed to be doing.  Hoss and Joe can oversee everything like Hank does at the Flying W, and I can be consulted as I’m needed.”

 

Hoss crossed his legs.  “Pa, it’s time.  We need to work smarter or we’re all gonna work ourselves into the ground.”

 

“No, we just need to stop taking on more work than we can handle,” Ben said, getting more angry by the minute.

 

Adam was standing now with his hands on his hips.  “If we don’t find a way to take on more work, the work will go somewhere else, and probably take a good part of what we count on away with it.  We can’t afford to just stand still, Pa.”

 

“Adam, we had this discussion when you wanted to go off chasing windmills, and look what happened.  We almost lost you.”

 

Adam rolled his eyes. “I could fall off my horse, hit my head and be gone tomorrow.  And let me remind you that we have windmills all over the Ponderosa now taking care of all those fields we couldn’t irrigate before.”

 

Hoss got up and stood beside Adam.  “I’m supposed to be helping Shiloh train her horses.  I ain’t even seen her horses since me and Annie got back from the Washoe village.”

 

Ben turned his back to them, breathing deeply to calm himself.

 

“Pa,” started Hoss, taking a step forward.  “All the other big outfits have a foreman, some of ’em more ‘n one.”

 

Spinning around, Ben yelled, “All the other ranch owners don’t have three healthy sons…”  He pointed to Micah who had rolled himself into the room, stopping next to the wood stove.  “Four with Micah…to help run their ranches.”

 

Though Micah had just joined them, he’d heard the first part of the conversation from the bedroom.  He had no trouble backing Hoss and Adam up.  “You don’t either.”

 

Everyone turned to Micah.  You could have heard a feather land on the floor.

 

“I don’t mean to butt in where I may not be wanted, but someone has to say it,” said Micah.  “Adam’s always taken on the responsibility of a foreman in addition to doing a full day’s work.  And even though he can’t do the work right now because of his hand, he’s still trying to keep up with two ranches and a partnership that has nothing to do with the ranch.  He has a wife to go home to every evening, and now a son, but by the time his day is done, there’s no time left for them.  Hoss’s eyesight still isn’t back to normal, and though he can do most of the work, there’s still the chance he might miss something that could cause an accident.  The only thing I’m good for these days is paperwork.”

 

Adam looked up at the ceiling, shaking his head.

 

“Look at me, Adam,” Micah yelled.  “You need to face the fact that I might never get out of this chair.”

 

Moving his hands to his hips, Adam bowed his head at the same time Ben crossed his arms and raised his hand to cover his mouth.  Hoss, who was already looking at the floor, glanced up, taking a quick look at Adam, and then his father.

 

And now Annie was standing at the top of the stairs.  “Pa, I don’t want the same thing to happen to me that’s happened to Shiloh.”

 

Adam looked up at her wearing a hurt frown.

 

As she came down the stairs, Annie continued.  “I didn’t say that to hurt you, Adam,” she said, taking his arm in her hands.  “It’s already been said.  I just wanted you to hear Shiloh’s side.

 

“Mr. Cartwright, that leaves you and Joe.  And Joe’s too young to take on everything by himself,” said Micah.

 

Stepping toward the desk, Adam held out his hand palm up.  “Pa, we’re not walking away from the work.  We’re just suggesting we handle everything a little differently.”

 

With an angry glare, Ben leaned over the desk toward his eldest.  “We wouldn’t be having this conversation if you hadn’t sought work away from the ranch.  I built this ranch for you three, expecting you to take over one day, to raise your families here.  Ever since you came home from college, it’s…it’s just never been enough for you…you were always looking for bigger and better things.”

 

Adam took a step back.  “Then why did you send me to college?” he said with his nostrils flared.  He could see where this conversation was headed.  He knew at some point they’d have it, he just didn’t expect it today.

 

Taking a deep breath, Ben calmed himself.  Still, he was on edge, wondering if this would be the time Adam decided the ranch was no longer enough.  “I sent you to college to try to satisfy a growing restlessness I saw in you from when you were very young,” he said, defeatedly.  “And I knew there would come a day when the work wouldn’t satisfy your intellect.”

 

Adam regarded his father for a moment. “Pa, I don’t want to leave the Ponderosa.  But I do want use the education you paid for.  I do believe that if we do nothing but continue to do things the way we’ve always done them, there won’t be a ranch to leave to your grandchildren.  We just need to work smarter, and delegating more of the work will give us the time to keep up with progress.”

 

“Progress,” Ben scoffed.

 

“Pa, I have a wife and a son who need me to be present in their lives.”

 

Pointing his finger, Ben ramped up again.  “I had no problems working this ranch with a wife and three sons.”  He looked away, then turned back to Adam, his voice deep and commanding.  “It’s time you made up your mind what you want to do.  Doing both isn’t working.”

 

Raising his chin, Adam opened his mouth to speak, but before he could, Hoss grabbed his arm.  With his brow furrowed, he said, “Don’t you say nothin’, Adam.  I think the two of ya need to walk away and calm down before this goes too far.”

 

Jerking his arm away from Hoss, Adam barked, “You’re too late, Hoss.  If Pa wants me to choose, so be it.”  He picked his hat up off the desk, looked at his father angrily as he moved it to his head and walked out.

 

Hoss hurried over to the study window and watched as Adam and Robert rode out of the yard.  Slowly turning, he opened his mouth and looked at his father in disbelief, shook his head, and left the room, taking his hat and gun belt and walking out the front door.

 

Annie was paralyzed in disbelief for a moment.  She looked at her father-in-law who seemed more stunned than she and watched him as he fell back into his desk chair.  She moved quickly to the door and went in search of her husband.

 

Micah had slowly turned his chair and made his way to the front porch after Adam left the house.  Before Adam rode away, the two men had a brief conversation.  They didn’t really look at each other, but rather looked out over the yard.  There was no point in asking if Adam really wanted to go through with this.  He had that look.  “It’s time for me to move back over to the Flying W.”

 

“Tell Hoss to let me know when you’re ready.”

 

Micah watched as Adam and Robert rode out.  When Hoss came out, Micah didn’t say anything.  It was apparent by the tormented look on his face that Hoss wouldn’t have been able to talk. Annie soon followed. Micah simply nodded toward the barn, then went back inside and to his bedroom.  He would tell Ben he would be leaving, but not now, not after Ben had just had the wind knocked out of him.

 

 

Chapter Twenty-Four

 

The ride to the Flying W was silent.  When Adam and Robert arrived, Adam went to the bunk house while Robert waited with the horses.  It didn’t take long for Adam to finish his business with the few men who had stayed behind from the cattle drive. His visit culminated in a long look at the front porch where he would build a ramp for Micah.

 

On the way back to the house, Robert asked, “Do I need to disappear for a while?”

 

Adam looked at him with furrowed brows.  “Why would you need to disappear?”

 

“Well, I was just thinking you’d want to discuss things with Shiloh.  I’ve always gotten the impression she’s quite attached to your father.”  He added quickly, “If I’ve overstepped my bounds, please say so.”

 

Smiling, Adam said, “I don’t think you can unhear what you heard.  Besides, this has nothing to do with her.  She can see Pa whenever she likes.”

 

“Oh, I thought you might be moving.  Isn’t your house on the Ponderosa?”

 

Adam pushed his bottom lip up.  “We’ve always considered it part of the Ponderosa.  The truth is it’s my land.  Pa had us pick out a piece of land for ourselves some time ago.  He deeded mine over to me when Shiloh agreed to marry me.  I own the land from the stables all the way north to the border with the Flying W.  And Micah and I are equal partners in the Flying W and the Whitney Mine.  All the Crocker timber contracts and one of the mine contracts are with the Flying W as well.”

 

“In other words, you have just as much to do even without your Ponderosa responsibilities.”

 

Chuckling with a crooked smile, Adam replied, “More, at least for a little while.  The Flying W doesn’t have a sawmill, and if I want to continue to compete for timber contracts, and I do, I’ll have to build one.  But the Flying W has a foreman, a very capable one, so I’ll be able to walk away from the physical work with the cattle and the upkeep and concentrate on the improvements.”

 

“It almost seems like you planned this.  You’ve obviously been giving it some thought.”

 

“No.”  Adam’s quick answer made Robert wince.  “I had planned to do this for both ranches.  But it seems my father doesn’t want anything to do with progress.”

 

Just before they turned up the road that led to the house, Adam said, “Robert, I’d appreciate it if you didn’t say anything about this to Shiloh.  I’ll discuss it with her…later.”

 

When the two men walked into the house, they each placed their hat on the entry table. Robert waited for Adam to remove his gun belt, and both men went into the office.

 

“Help yourself to a drink while I go tell Shiloh we’re back,” said Adam before he left the room.  As he trotted up the stairs, he called for her and got no response.  He stuck his head into their bedroom and called again, but was met with silence.  Next, he hurried back down the stairs and went into the kitchen. “Ming Lin, did Mrs. Cartwright mention where she was going?”

 

As Ming Lin dredged chicken in flour preparing for lunch, he replied, “Yes, Mr. Cartwright.  Mrs. Cartwright took Miss Etta and her daughter to the main house to see Mrs….Cartwright, and to allow Mr….”  Ming Lin looked dismayed and mumbled, “Too many Mr. and Mrs. Cartwright.”  Speaking up, he continued, “…to allow Mr. Cartwright to visit with grandson.”  Looking forward as if alarmed, he realized he had become so flustered he hadn’t used proper English.  He looked quickly back at Adam and relaxed. The master of the house seemed preoccupied and apparently hadn’t notice the error.

 

Without even thanking Ming Lin, Adam left the kitchen and went back to the office, barely stepping inside.  “Robert, I need to leave for a few minutes. Keep going over the last drawing.  We’ll pickup there when I get back.”

 

Again, he didn’t wait for an acknowledgement and hurried out of the house, grabbing his hat, but leaving his gun behind.

 

Hoss heard a horse ride fast into the yard, and got up to open the door before Adam had dismounted.  He waited for Adam on the front porch.

 

Adam stopped and cocked his head, well aware that Hoss’s intention was to intercept him.  He continued, but stopped just short of the porch.

 

Hoss lumbered up to the front edge with his hands in his pockets.  “Adam. You all right?”

 

Avoiding Hoss’s eyes, Adam nodded.  “Is Shiloh?”

 

“We weren’t gonna say anything to her without knowin’ if you had a chance to talk to her, but she knew somethin’ wadn’t right.  Annie talked to her first, told her about the fight.  Pa’s talkin’ to her now.”

 

“What about Etta and Rachel?”

 

“You know, older brother, that little gal just fits right in, don’t she?”

 

Moving his lips into a straight line, Adam replied, “I don’t know.  I haven’t really met her.”

 

“Well how come…” The perturbed look on Adam’s face stopped him.  “Well, anyway Shiloh introduced ’em and while we was all talkin’, Hop Sing took the little girl to the kitchen.  Then when Annie asked if Shiloh talked to you, well, Etta excused herself and went to the kitchen.”

 

Adam twisted his mouth. “You didn’t answer my question.  Is Shiloh all right?”

 

Looking down and shuffling his foot on the boards of the porch, he answered, “She’s just real quiet. She ain’t said much.  Why don’t you come on in and see for yourself?”

 

Raising his chin, Adam said definitively, “No.”

 

“Adam, if you just talk to Pa, maybe he’ll…”

 

Moving a hand to Hoss’s shoulder, Adam interrupted, “Hoss, it’s too soon.  It needs time and even with time, I don’t think he’ll change his mind.  The Ponderosa is his ranch, and it’s going to be run the way he wants it until he dies.  You and Joe need to be prepared for that.”

 

Hoss shrugged. “Dadgummit, Adam, Joe or me wouldn’t know how to do things differently anyhow.  But if things are gonna change like you say they are, I don’t see how Pa ain’t gonna figure out he needs to keep up.”

 

Smiling more for Hoss’s benefit than his own, Adam said, “If he does, I’ll be around. And if I’m not, I promise you’ll know how to find me.  Now, would you tell Shiloh lunch is almost ready?  Tell her I’ll be waiting at home.”

 

“You mean you ain’t packin’ up and moving to San Francisco?”

 

Adam had turned to leave, but spun around.  “Why does everyone think I’m moving to San Francisco?”  He shook his head and scratched his nose as he looked at his feet, then looked back up at Hoss.  “Business might take me there for a while at some point, but no, we’re not leaving.  I still have the property Pa gave me, and the Flying W and the mine.  And Shiloh seems set on raising our children here.   But I can’t just sit back and watch Pa lose everything he’s worked for.  Maybe he thinks the Ponderosa is immune to change because it’s so big, but her size means she’ll fail that much sooner.”  Turning to leave, he turned around again, this time scratching his ear.  “Why don’t you and Annie come for lunch.  Micah, too.  We have some things to discuss.”

 

Hoss simply nodded and watched Adam ride away.  When he entered the house, both Ben and Annie looked hopefully his way, but when they saw he was alone, they wilted just a little.

 

“Shiloh, Adam asked me to tell you lunch is almost ready,” said Hoss.  “He invited me and you, Annie, and Micah to have lunch over there.  Seems there’s some things he wants to make sure gets covered.” When Ben looked sadly away, Hoss added, “I’ll go over everything with you when we get back, Pa.”

 

“Hoss, you and Micah go.  I’ll have lunch here,” Anne said, smiling at her father-in-law.

 

Shiloh stood, prompting Ben and Annie to stand.  “Well then, I suppose I should collect Etta and Rachel and head home.  Adam will be waiting to help you get Micah up the steps,” she said to Hoss.

 

As Ben passed Abel to her, she gave him a weak smile. Taking her hands in his, he leaned in close.  “As far as I’m concerned nothing has changed between us.  I want you to continuing thinking of this house as an extension of your home.”

 

Stepping into him, she hugged him, then made a quick exit to the kitchen.  She didn’t want him to see her cry.

 

By the time Shiloh got home, she had resolved not to dissolve into a blubbering mess, something made easier by the presence of Etta and Rachel.  Their bags were still on the floor by the front door.  Shiloh had been tempted to carry them up to a bedroom, but bringing them back down would have been awkward if Adam turned her away.

 

“Adam,” she called when she opened the door.  “We’re home.”

 

Walking into the entry from the office, Adam bent and gave her a quick kiss, then kissed Abel on the top of his head.  “You all right?”

 

Taking a deep breath, she replied, “I really don’t know.  We have a lot to talk about, but it will have to wait.  Hoss and Micah will be a little while yet. Did you tell Ming Lin we’d have more guests for lunch?”  Adam nodded.  “Good. Then why don’t you go ahead and speak with Etta.”  She turned to look at Etta and smiled down at Rachel.  “While the two of you talk, I’ll take Rachel upstairs,” she said bending down to the little girl and smiling,  “and we’ll both get cleaned up for lunch.  How about it?”

 

Rachel looked up at her mother, and when Etta nodded, Rachel nodded, too and moved her hand into Shiloh’s.

 

As they walked up the stairs together, Adam motioned toward the sitting room where Etta sat on the sofa, clasping her hands on her lap.  Adam walked to the fireplace, pinching his bottom lip before he turned around, unsure of where to start.  He was at a disadvantage having only heard this young woman’s story from Shiloh.

 

“Did my wife explain the work you’d be doing here?”

 

“Yes, Mr. Cartwright.”

 

“Why do you think you’re qualified?”

 

“Because I have experience raising a child…bathing her, changing her diaper, feeding her, teaching her.”

 

Adam walked to the wing chair and sat down, crossing his legs.  “My wife is generally a good judge of character, but she also takes chances on people she doesn’t really know that well, so you’ll understand if I don’t share her confidence.  You’ll be tasked with the care of our son.  I’m not immediately inclined to trust someone I don’t know who comes to us with no references.”

 

Taking a deep breath, Etta began to fear the position wasn’t going to work out. “I understand, Mr. Cartwright.”

 

Adam observed her for a moment.  It appeared she wasn’t going to plead for the job, something he felt showed character. “Mrs. Wright, why didn’t you try to find my wife in Sacramento?  I understand you were turned away at the hotel, but her presence in Sacramento was very public and very frequent.  You could have gotten to her if you’d really tried.”

 

Etta looked directly at him as she answered.  “Mr. Cartwright, I met your wife on a stagecoach and had only the time between Virginia City and Sacramento City to speak with her.  Though I had heard of her, I really didn’t know much more about her other than she was a singer.  I had just arrived in Virginia City after losing my husband, who always took care of everything, faced with having to take care of myself and my little girl alone.  I suppose I used my rejection at the hotel as an excuse to, at least, try to take care of us.  Unfortunately, I have found there aren’t many people willing to give a young woman alone with a child a chance.  When Mrs. Cartwright found me again I…well, it seems my best efforts at taking care of us had failed miserably.  Her offer got me away from my last option,”  her voiced lowered when she bowed her head, “which wasn’t a very good one.  But I’ve been here for a while now, and have heard how charitable you all are, so when she said she’d get me out of the saloon…it was a great relief.”

 

Nodding, Adam went on. “Tell me about your education.”

 

“Well, I went to school until I turned sixteen. That’s when Gabriel, my husband, asked me to marry him.  He had just finished a general study at the university…in Boston.  He wanted to teach.  When his parents objected to our marriage, we put it off so he would have time to convince them.  We were married a year later…without their blessing.  We left Boston and went wherever he could find work.  He’d spend evenings practicing his teaching on me,” she said, smiling as she remembered what seemed to be good memories.  Her smile slowly faded.  “He heard there were teaching opportunities for the taking out here, so we left.  And Rachel and I lost him.”  There were no tears, only sadness.

 

Hoss stuck his head in the front door.  “Adam, we’re here.  Come give me a hand with Micah.”

 

I’ll be there in a minute,” Adam answered over his shoulder. Turning back to Etta, he continued, “So you read and write, and you know your numbers?”

 

“The book I’m reading currently is Walden by Thoreau.  Gabriel was teaching me geometry while we were traveling, though I really wasn’t very good at it.  He also taught me some biology, just a little beyond basic science.  And world history.  I was going to be his teaching assistant.”

 

Nodding, Adam stood.  “Would you excuse me for just a minute?”  He turned and left through the front door just as Shiloh came down the stairs with Abel in one arm and Rachel holding her other hand.

 

“Well, Etta.  How’d it go?” asked Shiloh still holding Rachel’s hand.

 

“I have no idea.  Someone came to the door.”

 

Ming Lin entered the sitting area so quietly, he surprised both woman when he spoke. “Mrs. Cartwright, lunch is ready.”

 

“Thank you, Ming Lin.  Oh, Ming Lin, one of our additional guests is Hoss.  Did you plan for that?”

 

“Yes, Mrs. Cartwright. I prepared plenty of fried chicken.”  Ming Lin bowed and left.

 

“Let me just settle Abel in his cradle, and we’ll go into the dining room,” said Shiloh.

 

There was a clamor at the front door, but Shiloh ignored it as she and Etta got Rachel settled on some books in a chair at the dining table.  By the time Micah was stationed at the end of the table, Shiloh and Etta were seated, patiently waiting.  Ming Lin had already started bringing food to the table, and when he was done, grace was said.

 

“Ming Lin, how’d you know to make extra fried chicken today?” asked Hoss.  Hoss had already gotten used to joking with Ming Lin when he was coming for dinner every evening after the fire until his father returned home.

 

Ming Lin answered without a smile, but with a twinkle in his eyes he couldn’t hide.  “There were two extra chickens in the flock this morning, Mr. Hoss.  I thought they might be from the Ponderosa because they knew you would be here.  It was their wish to be used for such an illustrious purpose.”

 

Hoss crinkled his brow and watched as Ming Lin disappeared back into the kitchen.  He looked at Adam, and then Shiloh. “He’s joshin’, ain’t he?”

 

Adam screwed his mouth up.  “He’s just been taking lessons from Hop Sing.  Hop Sing knows everything, even when he shouldn’t.”

 

Nodding, Hoss crooked his jaw and grunted.  Adam’s explanation certainly didn’t stop him from piling chicken on his plate.

 

Micah and Adam just watched and shook their heads, while Shiloh looked at Etta and winked.

 

“Robert, I want to apologize for what happened today at the main house,” began Shiloh.  “I don’t think any of us expected that, and I’m sure all of us are a little…concerned.”

 

“No need to apologize, my dear.  It happens in the best of families, including mine, if you’ll remember what my brother, Daniel, did,” said Robert, graciously.

 

Adam had been watching Shiloh who made no attempt to prepare a plate of food.  “Sweetheart,” he said, nodding at the plate.

 

“I’m afraid I’m not very hungry at the moment, Adam.  I need to let this settle first.  I’ll try to eat something in a little while.”  She took a drink of water and cleared her throat.  “Have you made a decision?”

 

He looked at her questioningly.

 

“About Etta’s employment,” she said with pleading eyes that only he could see.

He looked at Etta, then looked at Rachel, smiled and winked.  “How would you like to live here, Rachel?”

 

The little girl turned to her mother as grease from the chicken was wiped from her chin, then looked at Adam, returning his smile and nodding her head.

 

“I think we can try it and see how it goes,” he said before he took a bite of potato, then moved his eyes to Shiloh.

 

She smiled, though it was more of a weary smile than an excited one.  The truth was she knew he’d like Etta and knew she wasn’t going to have to put up much of a fight, which was a good thing, because at the moment all she wanted to do was cry.
Chapter Twenty-Five

 

After lunch, Shiloh showed Etta and Rachel to their room next to the nursery.  Abel was awake and chewing on his cloth doll, so Shiloh took him downstairs and left Etta and Rachel to unpack and situate their belongings in their room.

 

In the meantime, Robert had excused himself to the office while Hoss, Adam and Micah talked in the sitting area.  They stopped when Shiloh entered.

 

“Please don’t stop on my account.  I need to hear this, too.  In fact, I really want to know what happened.  I heard some from Annie, but Pa really wouldn’t tell me anything except I’m as welcome there as I ever was.”  She sat down next to Adam on the sofa.  As she began to settle Abel in her lap, Adam reached for him and laid the baby in the crook of his leg, facing him.

 

Taking a deep breath, he said, “You know I went to speak with him about hiring a foreman.”

 

“Yes, I know that.  But how did it deteriorate to this?  Have you separated yourself completely from the Ponderosa?”

 

Adam scratched his nose.  “Yes, for the time being.  Until I’m needed.”

 

“So you’re counting on him coming to tell you he was wrong?” she asked.

 

When Adam’s nostrils flared, Hoss spoke up.  “Shiloh, it’s not a question of who’s gonna apologize first.  Adam’s right.  We cain’t keep doing things the way we’ve always done ’em.  We just cain’t keep up, especially when we’re all thinkin’ about startin’ a family.”

 

“All?” Shiloh asked surprised.  “Who’s all?” she asked, looking at Micah.

 

He raised his hands up in front of him.  “Not me.”

 

“Joe?”

 

Hoss winced.  “Well, not Joe either.  Me and Annie.”

 

“Look,” started Adam with a grimace.  “That’s not the point.  The point is the Ponderosa has got to be able to handle more work if we’re not going to start losing business to other ranchers who’re improving the way they work.   The Flying W already adjusts well with Hank there.  We can prove that to Pa by putting our part of the Ponderosa under Hank along with the Flying W.  It means we’ll have to hire a few extra hands, but we’ll be able to take on much more.  The Crocker contracts will all be moved to Flying W land.  We’ll build a sawmill to handle them. And we’ll get the mine going as soon as Roy and Chuck find out who’s responsible for the explosion.  How can he deny what he sees with his own eyes?”

 

Everyone breathed in at the same time, no one completely confident that Ben was going to even pay attention.

 

“Micah, we’ll get you set up at the Flying W, and you can handle the books for the ranches and the mine, continued Adam. I’ll come over in the mornings to meet with you and Hank, and then Hank can run it.  If he has trouble, he’ll come to you, and if I need to get involved, you can send word.  I trust Chuck Evans to run the mine.  He can meet with us in the mornings as well.  And I still have the plans for the sawmill on the Ponderosa.  I’ll give them to Jim Tyler and get a price from him to build it.  Until I have to get involved in something, I’ll be doing Slater and Cartwright work.  And I fully expect that unless it’s an emergency, we’ll all be home for dinner every night.”

 

Shiloh had listened, but as soon as Adam mentioned dinner, she looked over at Micah.  He’d be alone in that house…all day.  Still looking at Micah, she asked, “Adam, why can’t Micah stay here?  That way he won’t be alone in that house all day, and he won’t have to worry about preparing a meal from the chair.”

 

Adam looked over at Shiloh, and seeing worry lines across her forehead, he knew it wasn’t going to settle well if Micah didn’t agree.  But knowing Micah, he wasn’t going to.   He looked over at Micah and nodded toward Shiloh.

 

“Little Sister, I don’t have a problem being alone. And I’m not gonna be confined to the house.  Adam’s gonna build a ramp for me to roll off the front porch.”

 

“How are you going to prepare a meal?” she asked with a long face.

 

“Like I always have.  I’ll just have everything moved down to the lower shelves.  I don’t need a lot of dishes and pans for just me.  And I’ll stay in the downstairs bedroom.”

 

She folded her hands in her lap and fidgeted.  “And has Dr. Martin said you can put your feet on the floor?  If he hasn’t, how are you going to get from the bed to the chair and back by yourself?  And who’s going to redress your feet?”

 

Micah moved his hand to his mouth and cut his eyes toward Adam.  “I haven’t moved yet.  I suppose there’s still some things to be worked out.”

 

She said no more, and turned her attention to her child who was trying his best to get his father’s finger in his mouth.  As endearing as it was, it drew no smile.

 

With the sudden silence in the room, Hoss decided it was time to go, so he pushed himself out of the chair he occupied.  “Well, it’s a start.  I reckon we need to wait and see what Pa’s gonna do, and if it’s continuin’ to go like we’ve been goin’, I may not be seein’ much of you.”  As Adam passed the baby to Shiloh and stood, Hoss continued.  “You may not be seein’ Annie much either.  Dr. Martin’s asked her for some help with the women in the area.  Seems some of ‘em ain’t too keen on seein’ a male doctor for…”  He bowed his head as color rose in his cheeks.  “…well, you know…female kinda things.”

 

Shiloh smiled and rose, holding Abel to her shoulder.  “I’m sure she’s happy to be getting some patients besides Cartwrights and Whitneys.  But Hoss, didn’t you want to continue with the horses?”

 

Folding his lips into a frown, he answered, “I just don’t know, Shiloh.  I told Pa again that’s what I wanna do, but the way things are now, I just don’t know if I’ll have the time.”

 

When she looked over at Adam, he expected to see some anger, but what he saw was disappointment.  Even though she tried to smile, it faded quickly. “I’ll say goodbye now then.  I should go see if Etta needs anything.”  She didn’t kiss either Hoss or Micah as she normally would, but rather left them watching as she climbed the stairs.

 

“Adam, I…”

 

Holding up his hand, Adam put his arm over Hoss’s shoulder and gave him a half smile and slight shrug.  “Your first responsibility is to the Ponderosa.  She’s not ready to start training anyway.”

 

After Micah was loaded into the wagon, and he and Hoss were on their way back to the main house, Adam went into the office where he and Robert worked on the plans for the Hotaling Building and the elevation drawings for the new apartment row at Jackson Square.

 

Shiloh fed Abel, then changed into her work clothes.  She showed Etta around the house, discussing her new responsibilities, then ducked her head in the door of the office.  “Adam, we’re on our way to the stables.  I expect to be there for several hours.”

 

Excusing himself, he left Robert and met her at the door, leaning in close and speaking quietly.  “I thought maybe you’d reconsidered.”

 

“Why would I?” she asked softly.  “The sooner I get back on a horse, the sooner I’ll work out the soreness.  And I need to see what Cotton already knows.  She seems fairly tame already.”

 

Raising his brows, he said.  “We still need to talk about recent events.”

 

Her mouth twisted as she cast her eyes down to the middle button on his shirt.  As she reached out and fiddled with it, she said, “After dinner,” barely loud enough to be heard, then turned and left without another word.

 

Adam watched the women collect the things they were taking with them from the heap they had deposited at the foot of the stairs…curious things like a picnic blanket, a small valise, and a large oblong, but shallow basket.  Only when the door had closed behind them, did he turn back into the office.

 

As the women walked down the hill toward the stables, Etta stole several glances Shiloh’s way.  Ma’am, may I ask a question?”

 

Shiloh smiled, continuing to face forward.  It was obvious being friends would come slowly in their current arrangement.  “Of course.”

 

“I done think I’ve ever seen a grown woman wear trousers.  Why do you wear them?”

 

Shiloh blew out of her mouth.  She’d thought the battle of the buckskin pants was over.  “I wear them because of the work I do with my horses.  I don’t just ride them.  I train them.   And they’re not usually broken when I get them, so I tend to spend a significant amount of time on the ground or bent over working on their feet. I used to wear them all the time, but Mr. Cartwright seemed to take exception to them, so now I only wear them when I’m working around the ranch.”

 

Etta stopped walking.  “You work around the ranch.  I thought you were a singer.”

 

Shiloh motioned her forward.  “When I was young I used to help my father on our ranch.  That ranch is the Flying W.  When I was sixteen, I was sent back east to school…” she glanced at Etta to see her reaction. “…college…Vassar.”  Etta stopped again, and Shiloh grabbed her arm and pulled her forward.  “Why don’t we stop here?  You and Rachel will have a good view of the horses.”  The ladies began to spread the picnic blanket on the ground, then set the valise and basket on the blanket.  “When my father died, I returned to run the ranch, so you see, I’m used to the ranch work.  I wasn’t going to sing when I came home, but Adam convinced me to try it one more time.  And then when we were married, he took over the work of the ranch.  When Micah came home, they began running the ranch together.”

 

Etta took Abel from his mother and lay him in the basket, then laid a light blanket over the handle, allowing him to see the sky, but shielding him from the sun.  Rachel sat quietly on a corner content to play with her doll. “How did you come to train horses?”

 

Standing and making sure everything was where it needed to be, Shiloh nodded and smiled.  “My father was a well-known horse trainer.  He taught me a good bit before I went back east, but most I remember from watching him.”  Shiloh waited for the next question, but it seemed Etta was all out at the moment.  “If you get bored, there’s a bench over there with a beautiful view of the lake,” she said, pointing.  “But you’ll need to keep a close watch on Rachel.  The hill down to the lake is very steep and rocky.”

 

After Etta nodded and smiled, Shiloh continued to the stables where Tom and Johnny were exercising the black horses in the corrals. Both men dismounted wearing smiles to greet their boss.

 

Removing his hat, Tom said, “Mrs. Cartwright, we were beginning to wonder if you’d given up on the horses.”

 

Returning his smile, she reached up and rubbed Eli’s nose.  “Never in a million years,” she said. “I need two things.  Put Cotton in the training pen, and then saddle Spirit.”

 

“Mrs. Cartwright, are you sure you wanna ride?” asked Johnny.  “It’ll be uncomfortable after so long.”

 

“Yes, I know.  I’m just going to get up and sit today.  Tomorrow we’ll take a few steps.  The next day, a few more.”

 

***

 

Sitting next to Robert at the drawing table, Adam pointed to a line on the plans they were working on.  “Now, with the extra supports you just drew here and here,” he said, indicating another line on the plans, we can put a beam all the way across this room without a support in the middle. You end up with a completely unobstructed space.”

 

That line, being the last line of the first floor of a two story apartment, prompted Robert to set the drawing aside and pull over the specifications for the walls that would be shared by two apartments on each side and across the back.  “Now, what did you have in mind for the specification that shared walls between apartments be built in such a way that fire will not jump from one apartment to another?” asked Robert.

 

“Have you ever heard of asbestos?”  asked Adam.

 

“No.  I can’t say that I have,” answered Robert.

 

“It’s a combination of minerals that forms thin crystals.  In ancient times, the Greeks, Romans, and Italians made cloth out of it.  They’d throw the cloth into a fire to clean it.  The fire would burn the dirt and debris away without harming the cloth.”

 

Robert looked sidelong at Adam.  “Even if that was something more than a myth, how is an unburnable cloth going to help us here?”

 

Adam chuckled.  “It’s not.  At least not as cloth.  H. W. Johns Manufacturing in New York is testing asbestos applications as fire resistant roofing.  I contacted them to find out about it, and once I explained what we’d be doing, they were more than happy to provide us with material.” It was obvious to Adam, based on the skeptical look on Robert’s face, he was unconvinced  that asbestos was the way to go.  “Here me out,” said Adam, reaching for an envelope wedged between two books sitting on a shelf above the drawing table. He pulled a thick letter out of the envelope and passed it to Robert.  As Robert skimmed over there letter, Adam continued.  “Johns has shipped a bucket of white paint mixed with the asbestos crystals to me.  The idea is to use double brick for the walls between the apartments with a coat if this asbestos paint between them.  The apartment side of the brick will be an interior wall.”

 

Tossing the letter onto the drawing table, Robert said flatly, “Just how do you expect to sell this and justify the additional cost.  It’s unproven.”

 

Still wearing a smile, Adam replied, “That’s what the first bucket is for.  We’ll test it here, and if it works, we’ll be able to demonstrate it when we present our bid.  It’s supposed to be here day after tomorrow.”

 

“And if it doesn’t work?”

 

“Then we’ll use a triple layer of brick like everyone else.  We’ll still have the advantage because of the courthouse,” Adam answered, taking another sip of his coffee.

 

Robert stood to stretch his legs.  He walked across the room and turned, laughing under his breath.  “And just how did you come up with this idea?”

 

Adam laughed and looked up at Robert from under his brows.

 

“Oh yes.  Greeks and Romans,” said Robert, rolling his eyes.

 

Chapter Twenty-Six

 

Adam leaned against a post of the summer house he’d started just after he and Shiloh had moved into the house.  He’d only finished it a few months before Abel was born.  Now, he and Robert were enjoying a brandy while they waited for Shiloh to return from the stables.

 

As he watched her work with Cotton in the distance, Robert asked, “Adam, did you hear me?

 

Adam quickly looked back toward his guest.  “Huh?”

 

“I asked what made you think about asbestos?”

 

“Oh.  I remembered reading something about cloth that wouldn’t burn when I was looking up Roman aquaducts for the sewer under the courthouse.”  He turned back toward the stable.

 

Joining him at the edge of the summer house, Robert watched for a moment before he said, “I’ve heard she’s very good at what she does. Let’s see,” he said, tapping his chin with a finger.  “Where did I hear that?”

 

Adam laughed mockingly. “She is. But sometimes she ignores her limits, especially physical ones.”

 

At that moment, Shiloh stepped down out of the saddle and fell backwards.  Adam suddenly straightened, moving both feet flat on the deck with both hands clenched at his side, his eyes fixed on his wife, and his mind racing because he was too far away to do anything.  But Tom and Johnny were on either side of her, each man grasping one of her arms and breaking her fall.

 

Shiloh glanced up the hill and winced when she saw Adam watching from the structure at the back of the house.  Then her eyes focused much closer where Etta was standing, looking her way with both hands over her mouth.  Giving each hired hand a look of thanks, she patted their arms, then moved a hand to the small of her back and started slowly toward Etta.

 

Adam shook his head as he and Robert headed back into the house.

 

When Shiloh got to the blanket, Etta was still standing after watching her employer walk stiffly up the rise.

 

“It looks like you could use a soak in a hot tub,” said Etta.  “Abel is staring to get fussy.  After he’s fed, I’ll draw a bath for you.”

 

Squinting up toward the house, Shiloh looked for Adam at the summer house.  When she didn’t find him, she decided a delay was in order to give her back time to unknot.  “I have a better idea.  Why don’t we go over to the bench while I feed Abel.  I think you and Rachel will enjoy the view.”

 

Rachel was now standing right up against her mother.  As Shiloh reached down to touch the little girl’s golden brown hair, she said, “She’s been so still up here, a little exercise will do her good.”  Raising her eyes to Etta as she maintained her smile toward Rachel, she added, “But you’ll have to watch her closely.”

 

They gathered everything they had brought from the house, and once Shiloh and Abel were settled on the bench, Etta and Rachel explored the hillside.

 

Adam and Robert called it a day when Ming Lin advised dinner would be ready within the hour.  Both men were enjoying a brandy in the living area, but Adam was getting more and more restless by the minute.

 

Finally, he downed the last of his aperitif.  “She should have been here by now.  Excuse me.”  Setting his cordial on the entry table, he walked purposefully out the front door and around the side of the house, stepping down off a low terraced rock wall he had built to level the ground for a flower garden.  He searched down the hill first, and when he saw no sign of the blanket or the ladies, he stood straight, his body becoming rigid as he focused all his senses on the area in front of him.  In the distance Tom and Johnny were moving the last of the horses into the stable, but between the stable and the house all was still.  Then he heard the sound of a child’s laughter floating on the light breeze blowing from the west.  He couldn’t help smiling, imagining the carefree sound was coming from his own children.  Taking a deep breath, he remembered that it wasn’t his child laughing.

 

Standing a short distance away, Adam looked on his wife, her hair pulled back into a pony tail with tiny wisps of ringlets glistening in the last of the late evening sunlight and blowing gently around her face.  One side of her blouse was open, exposing her breast.  It appeared Abel hadn’t completely lost interest as his lips still occasionally sucked, but his eyelids only fluttered.  Shiloh wasn’t paying attention or she would have already brought him to her shoulder.   She looked more happy than he’d seen her in a while as she watched Etta with Rachel, smiling at the little girl’s laughter.

 

A smile slowly found its way to his lips again as he watched her, but just as slowly faded away.  He knew she had seen him watching when she fell off the horse.  He knew she was stalling.  When he stopped behind the bench, she had been so enchanted in the happy scene in front of her, she hadn’t heard him.  When he leaned over her to smell her hair, his shadow fell over her, causing her to jump.  She instinctively pulled  Abel’s small blanket over her and the baby.

 

“It’s just me,” said Adam with a smile as he sat on the bench next to her. “I heard the laughter…thought it was a nice sound.”  Tilting his head, his smile reached his eyes as he gazed upon her.  “Are you all right?”

 

“Why wouldn’t I be all right?” she asked as she continued to watch Etta play with Rachel.

 

Adam chuckled and bent to pull a weed, sticking the stiff end in his mouth.  “Because, ah, you fell off a horse.”

 

“Oh, spsh!  I didn’t fall off a horse.”

 

Wagging his head playfully, he answered, “Well, I wouldn’t have believed it if someone else had told me, but I saw it with my own two eyes.”

 

“I didn’t fall off the horse,” she said indignantly.  “I was already half way down when my foot got stuck in the stirrup.”

 

Nodding his head emphatically, he stuck his tongue in his cheek, and decided it would be safer if he said nothing more about the horse.  “Seriously, you seemed pretty stiff when you were walking up the hill.  Are you all right?”

 

Barely turning her head, she sheepishly moved her eyes up to his, then cast her eyes down.  “My back is a little sore.”

 

Adam peeked underneath the blanket to find Abel sound asleep with a line of milk glistening on his cheek.  Taking the cloth Shiloh kept on her shoulder when she nursed him, he gently wiped his son’s face and lifted him out of his mother’s arms.  “Ming Lin said supper would be ready soon.  We should get cleaned up.”

 

Nodding and smiling, Shiloh buttoned her blouse while Adam gathered Etta and Rachel.

 

“You look like you’re about to fall over,” he said, looking down at Rachel with a smile.

 

She moved in close to his leg and looked straight up at him, nodding and rubbing her eyes.

 

Grinning at the cuteness now leaning against his leg, he passed the baby to Etta and lifted Rachel up, settling her on one arm.

 

She laid her head on his shoulder, and by the time they all walked in through the kitchen door, she was sound asleep.

 

“I’ll take her upstairs,” whispered Adam.  “If she wakes up later, we’ll find something in the kitchen for her.”

 

Etta nodded and turned to Shiloh.  “I’ll put Abel to bed as well, Ma’am.”

 

Watching as everyone ascended the stairs, Shiloh stood where she was feeling useless.  Still, she wasn’t going to complain.  She wasn’t looking forward to tackling those stairs the way she was hurting.  She smiled, remembering Hop Sing and Ming Lin’s teas, and turned toward the kitchen.

 

***

 

Dinner was quiet with no children to tend, though Robert and Adam didn’t seem to have a shortage of topics, mostly having to do with buildings.  Occasionally, Shiloh and Etta would have a brief conversation, but both women were tired from their afternoon.  After dinner, they both excused themselves to their bedrooms for the evening.

 

When Adam came into the bedroom, he expected to see his wife in the bed. When he didn’t find her there, he looked around the dim room, then looked in on Abel, pulling his blanket up over him before he walked through the bedroom to the washroom.  Slowly pushing open the door, he watched for a moment as she relaxed in the bath with her eyes closed, her head laying back against a folded towel she’d laid against the side of the metal tub.

 

“I thought you’d be asleep by now,” he said, smiling down at her at the side of the tub.

 

She sucked in a startled breath and opened her eyes, then smiled and closed them again.  “How do you do that?”

 

“Do what?”

 

“Get this close without me hearing you?  You’re a man.  I’ve never known any men who were very light on their feet other than those who were danseurs.”

 

“Well, now you do, and I don’t dance ballet,” he said, squatting down next to the tub.  “Do you feel like talking?”

 

“Depends.”

 

“On what?”

 

“The topic.”

 

Chuckling, he said,  “I don’t think I have to explain the topic.”

 

“Then no, I don’t want to talk.  At least not about that anyway.  Not tonight.”

 

“Then when?”

 

“When I can.”
“Shiloh….”  When she turned her head and opened her eyes, he could now see the bright blue of her irises prominent against the red around them.

 

“I just don’t think I can right now.   I don’t even know what to say.”

 

Reaching into the bath water, he found her hand and brought it out of the tub and to his lips.  After kissing it long and tenderly, he held it in both of his hands and ran his thumb over it.  “You’ve been in the tub too long.  You’re skin is starting to wrinkle.”  He stood and stepped away to retrieve a towel which he brought back to the side of the tub. “Come on.  Let’s get you in bed.”

 

She didn’t argue.  She stood and waited for him to wrap the towel around her and lift her  out of the tub, taking her to the bed where he set her feet on the floor and dried her.  Pulling the covers down, he waited for her to lie down, then covered her.

 

“Aren’t you coming to bed?” she asked.

 

“Mm hm,” he answered, still smiling as he unfastened his belt and began to unbutton his shirt.  “I won’t be long,” he said as he disappeared into the washroom.  When he returned, she was already sound asleep.   Blowing out the lamp on either side of the bed, he slipped in next to her and pulled her against him without waking her, he assumed because she was exhausted between work and worry.

 

It was a quiet night, he thought as he lay listening. Though the doors to the balcony were open, the air was still.  It seemed that all God’s creatures had turned in for the night.  It wasn’t long before he was sleeping right along with them.

 

***

 

Opening her eyes, she looked  at the shadows that danced across the ceiling in the moonlight and tried to judge the time.  Looking over at Adam sound asleep, she feigned turning over and then backing up to him, a sure way to get him to do the same as he slept.

 

She slowly sat up and looked over him at his alarm clock.  Though it was dark, there was just enough moonlight to see the time…just after midnight.

 

Slipping out of the bed, she found her robe and tiptoed out onto the balcony.  The wind had picked up just enough to cause her to tightly rap her robe around her and tie the sash.  She was wide awake with everything on her mind pushing to the surface.  At the moment,  the one thing that wore on her most was Adam’s extrication from the Ponderosa and his father.  She couldn’t help but think it was her doing.

 

She was so lost in her thoughts of how to get the two men back together that she didn’t hear Adam steal out onto the balcony.  He was so quiet, she had no idea he was behind her, watching her, until he moved his good hand to her shoulder, bending his head and kissing her neck.

 

“You’re muscles are tight.  What’s keeping you up?” he asked softly. When she turned around, he made sure she couldn’t escape his arms.  “You said we’d talk after dinner.  Dinner was hours ago.”

 

She dropped her forehead onto his chest.  “I can’t help but feel responsible for your argument with your father.  I kept pushing you to give something up.  I never meant it to be your father.”

 

Raising an eyebrow, he asked, “Is that what’s been bothering you?”

 

Still with her head on his chest, she groaned and sniffled.

 

“First of all, I haven’t given up my father.  And second, this has been a long time coming.  Pa and I have argued about this many times…even before you came home.”

 

“Then what’s changed?”

 

“Progress has finally caught up to us.”  He lifted her face to his. “Shiloh, we have a child.  Hoss and Annie want to start a family, and Hoss wants to build a house, which means they’ll be moving out of Pa’s house.  That leaves Joe.  Don’t you think that one day, Joe will find someone and move out, too?”

 

She twisted her mouth, but didn’t answer.

 

“I have other interests in Slater and Cartwright.  Hoss has other interests now in your horses, and his wife is a doctor.  What if her work takes them somewhere else?” he asked with raised brows.  Lifting her chin with his finger, he finished, “Pa has to realize that his sons are grown men with their own desires that might not be exclusive to Ponderosa.”

 

“You’re talking about leaving it to your father to run.   I don’t know that he’s up to that.  Besides that, he’s very hurt.  I just can’t bear to see him like that.”

 

“No, that’s not what I’m saying.  What I’m saying is that we need to work smarter to keep up and still be able to do the things we want to do.  And spend time with our families.  And make sure we spend time with Pa.”

 

He was afraid he hadn’t convinced her of anything because she looked away out over the pastures with a long sigh.

 

“Come back to bed.”

 

She snorted.  “Why?  I can’t sleep.”

 

Kissing her forehead, he said, “Oh, I think I can help you with that.”

 

She sank somewhat in his arms.  “I’m afraid you won’t get much out of it.”

 

“I’m not talking about that,” he said with a slight glare.  “Do you think that’s all I think about?”

 

Twisting her mouth to hide a smile caused a dimple in her cheek.  “In your own words, Mr. Cartwright, and I can certainly vouch for them, you are a man,” she said, moving her eyes up to his.

 

He laughed. “I thought maybe I’d give you a back rub…,” he said, pushing his bottom lip up and slightly shrugging one shoulder, “…maybe a shoulder rub…and lull you to sleep.”

 

Perking up, she smiled.  “Oh.  Well.  That’s an entirely different prospect then, isn’t it?  But how are you going to do that with one hand?”

 

He pulled a puzzled face as he looked away and thought.  “Maybe we should just try the other.”

 

Chapter Twenty-Seven

 

Several weeks had gone by and the household belonging to Adam Cartwright had settled down to a nice, even pace that had everyone up early, meals eaten together around the same time every day, and everyone to bed at a reasonable hour.

 

Robert was on his way back to San Francisco with a bundle of drawings in their protective tubes under his arm, drawings which he swore to protect with his life.  He left behind new specifications for a luxury hotel containing six hundred rooms, all of them suites, some nicer, of course, four separate ballrooms, a large dining room, an atrium, a spectacularly appointed lobby, a gentlemen’s lounge which in Virginia City would be called a saloon, a music hall, and a row of shops right off the lobby meant to entertain the wives of the men who partook of the offerings of the gentlemen’s club.

 

The test of the asbestos paint was a resounding success, so Slater and Cartwright would be demonstrating it during their presentation to the owners of the land at Jackson Square in July. The Hotaling Building designs were complete and would also be delivered.

 

Shiloh worked daily with her horses and had actually begun to ride in the corrals, though at the end of the day she was still sore.  Nevertheless, she continued as her soreness was slowly diminishing.

 

Etta settled into a routine herself which included spending significant time with Rachel at Adam’s insistence while she was watching over Abel. She also helped Ming Lin in the kitchen and in cleaning the house.

 

Micah had been moved back to the Flying W, his kitchen rearranged, all his things moved into the downstairs bedroom, and under Adam’s direction, a ramp built on the front porch.  The bed had been lowered so that Micah could move himself from the bed to the wheelchair and back.  He could go into the yard, and back into the house, but for the time being, that was all he could do unless he was lifted into a wagon or buggy.

 

After showing Shiloh how to clean, treat, which only consisted of spreading Hop Sing’s salve, and bandaging Adam’s hand, Annie decreased her stops at the house to once a week.  It seemed the more women she saw in her new practice, the more were asking to see her, so her medical practice was growing among the women in Virginia City, Carson City, and the surrounding smaller towns.

 

Adam’s hand had healed enough that only the palm was bandaged.  His fingers were free to move about which allowed him to deal with any problems or trouble on the Flying W and his piece of the Ponderosa.  He was also able to draw, so he started the plans for a home in Virginia City and the conceptual drawings for the luxury hotel in San Francisco.

 

He was in his office with the door closed because Shiloh had been playing her piano all morning.  She was a bit out of practice, but even so, she was better than anyone else he’d ever heard.  This particular morning Adam assumed she was writing a new piece of music because she did a lot of stopping and starting.

 

When a knock sounded at the front door, neither of them heard.  It was Etta who answered.

 

A gentleman wearing a suit removed his hat and slightly bowed.  “Ah, hello, Ma’am.  It seems I may have the wrong house.  I wouldn’t have thought so seeing as it’s on the Ponderosa, so I’m assuming this is a Cartwright house?”

 

Etta smiled charmingly enough for the gentlemen to take notice and smile back.  “Which of the Cartwrights are you looking for, sir?”

 

“That would be Adam Cartwright,” he answered.

 

“Then you are in the right place.  Won’t you please come in?”  Etta led him into the living room and motioned to a chair.  “If you wouldn’t mind waiting, I’ll tell Mr. Cartwright you’re here.  Who shall I say is calling?”

 

“Sam.   Sam Clemens from the Territorial Enterprise.  Though this isn’t official newspaper business.  You see, Adam and I are old friends.  For that matter, Mrs. Cartwright and I are old friends.”  Slowly sitting in the chair, Sam watched as Etta left to find Adam.

 

It was only a few minutes later that Sam heard less dainty footsteps coming his way.  He turned in the chair and looked, seeing Adam approaching him with a grin.  Before Sam could stand, Adam was holding his hand out.

 

Sam hesitated.  “I, ah, heard about that little incident,” he said pointing at Adam’s hand. “How is it?”

 

“Heard about it!  You wrote about it without even seeing how bad it was first,” said Adam with furrowed brows and a stunted smile.

 

“Well, considering it’s still bandaged, I’d say I was pretty accurate.”  Leaning closer, he said in a lower voice.  “Don’t let this get out, but I did speak to the good doctor, and he obliged knowing that we’re friends.”

 

Adam chuckled.  “Sam, how’ve you been?  I haven’t seen you in town lately,” he said, motioning to the chair Sam had just vacated and heading for a chair opposite him.  “Would you like a drink?”

 

Sam waved his hand.  “No, never touch the stuff.”

 

Tilting his head, Adam gave him an expectant glare.

 

“Well, at least not anymore.  I just came out to say goodbye.  I don’t expect I’ll be telling many folks goodbye personally, but you Cartwrights have certainly kept things interesting while I’ve been here.”

 

Adam had moved to the edge of his chair.  “Sam,” he said while giving his guest a sidelong look.  “What happened?”

 

Looking away for a moment, Sam looked back with shock on his face, but Adam had twisted his mouth and was nodding knowingly.  Sam snorted.  “No much gets by you, does it?”

 

“Nope.  Besides, I might have heard something…about you and Laird over at the Daily Union.  You do know dueling is illegal?”

 

“Yes, well, I, ah, understand I have a certain Cartwright to thank for that.  As I recall, it was your father who proposed that particular law after one of his sons fought a duel over an insult directed at a young woman.  A soiled dove, if I remember correctly.”

 

Both men turned at the sound of a feminine voice.

 

“That’s one I don’t think I’ve heard,” said Shiloh, grinning but glaring at her husband.  The glare was quickly replaced with her brilliant smile.  “Sam, it’s good to see you,” she said, holding out her hands.

 

He stood and took them in his own, bringing one hand up to kiss.  “I do believe motherhood agrees with you, Shiloh.”  His smile turned into a questioning look.  “If I still have permission to call you by your first name.  I seem to remember you were never one to stand on propriety around your friends.”

 

“Shiloh is fine.  Please sit down,” she said as she went toward the sofa.  “Now, what’s all this about duels?”

 

“Sam came to say goodbye.  Seems he challenged John Laird to a duel,” explained Adam.

 

Shiloh arched a brow.  “Sam, why would you do such an absurd thing?”

 

“It seemed fitting at the time,” he answered.  “And that’s why I don’t drink any longer.  At any rate, I’m leaving town.  I don’t think the offense is one that our good Sheriff Coffee will considering putting together a posse for.  But I did want to tell you goodbye,” he said smiling at Shiloh.  “After all, I did send you flowers when we first met.”

 

“Oh yes,” said Shiloh, slowly grinning.  “You also took me to the Washoe Club for dinner.  So Sam, why did you stop sending me flowers?”

 

He opened his mouth to speak, looked at Adam, who was looking back at him with interested furrowed brows, and then closed it quickly, thinking about his answer.  “It was, ah, apparent you were already wearing a brand as they say out here.  One that resembles a pine tree.”

 

“Hmf,” she grunted.

 

“And then there was Tom Maguire.”

 

Adam’s lower jaw dropped slightly.

 

“Tom Maguire?” she repeated, looking somewhat skeptical.

 

“Yes.  We both recognized that brand when Adam came into the opera house and you leapt into his arms.”

 

“I didn’t leap into his arms,” she said, drawing in one side of her mouth as she crossed her arms in front of her.

 

Grinning and raising both eyebrows, Adam said, “Actually, you did.”

 

She gave him a cold stare that prompted Sam to stand.

 

“Well, I’ve said my goodbyes, and it seems I’ve left you both a topic of conversation.  My work here is done,” Sam said, slightly bowing.

 

Shiloh sprang up from the sofa and moved her arm in his as they walked to the door.  “I’m not allowing you to leave until I know where you’re going.”

 

“Not that far away, and not a place unfamiliar to you, nor unfamiliar with you, my dear lady.  I am leaving for San Francisco as soon as I mount my horse.  I’ve been writing articles for the Daily Morning Call. They seem to like them, so they’ve decided to keep me on in The City.”

 

Adam opened the front door just as his wife and guest arrived.  “Then hopefully we’ll meet again.  We’ll be in San Francisco in July.”

 

As Shiloh released Sam’s arm and slipped her arm in Adam’s, Sam said, “I’m sure life in the big city will be quite interesting when Cartwrights are present…if I know my Cartwrights.”

 

Adam laughed and shook Sam’s hand.  “I think San Francisco is in for a roaring good time with Mark Twain there as well.”

 

“Ah, perhaps,” answered Sam as he placed his hat on his head.  “Until we meet again, then.” Turning, he trotted down the front steps and mounted his horse, and before he rode away, he turned and waved one last time.

 

When Sam was out of sight, Adam closed the door and turned with his arm around Shiloh’s waist back toward the living area.

 

But Shiloh pulled back, just enough to stop their forward movement.  “A duel?” she asked, looking up into his eyes.  “You fought a duel?   Over a saloon girl?”

 

Adam tried not to smile as he scratched an eyebrow.  “It wasn’t much of a duel.  The other fellow couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn.”

 

Tilting her head, Shiloh’s lips moved into a strained smile.  “Over a saloon girl?”   Is she still in Virginia City?”

 

Adam’s smile slowly faded.  “No. She was killed.”

 

His quick change in demeanor tugged at her heart strings, and she turned into him.  “What happened?” she asked softly, giving him a look that said she understood it was something that troubled him.

 

He looked into her eyes and wondered if she would really want to know, then took a deep breath.  “Her name was Sue Ellen, and she was…I don’t know…looking for something better.  I suppose I felt a little sorry for her.”  Taking Shiloh’s hand, he walked back into the living area, stopping in front of the fireplace.  “It turned out she had a secret admirer who was obsessed with her.  He shot her trying to kill me…to get me out of his way, and then he framed me for her murder.”

 

When Shiloh’s hand rose to cover her mouth, he took it in both of his and kissed it.  “Obviously, it turned out all right.  For me anyway.”

 

She leaned against his chest and smiled up at him.  “Lucky me,” she said as she ran the back of her fingers down his cheek, moving closer, inviting him to kiss her.

 

He did, and as her arms went up over his shoulders and his hands moved around her back, a curious little girl scooted down the stairs one step at a time until she reached the bottom.  She stood and quietly walked into the living area, wrapping her arms around Adam’s leg and holding on.

 

Adam broke the kiss, his eyes wide, his face expressionless as he looked over Shiloh’s head, but only for a moment.  He looked down and into the face of a little angel smiling up at him.

 

Shiloh looked down, too, and when she saw Rachel, she made a snorting sound, trying not to laugh out loud and took a step back so that Adam could extricate himself from the little girl’s arms.

 

Squatting down, Adam smiled.  “Where’s your mother?”

 

In a small, soft child’s voice Rachel answered, “Baby had a stinky di-di.”

 

“I should go up and see if he’s hungry.  It’s time,” said Shiloh, kissing her husband once more just as he stood.  She held her hand down to Rachel.  “Come on, then.  Let’s go find Mama.”

 

Rubbing his chin as he watched them climb the stairs, Adam knew he had a growing problem on his hands.  He decided a discussion with Shiloh and Etta this evening after Rachel was in bed was in order.

 

Chapter Twenty-Eight

 

Shiloh and Etta sat in chairs in the office with Adam standing in front of them, one arm across his chest and the other elbow resting on it, the hand at his chin and a finger resting beside his nose.

 

Both women watched him anxiously while they waited for him to collect his thoughts, thoughts that were obviously hard to articulate.

 

Moving his hands to his hips, he said, “I don’t know how to approach this.”  He looked at the ladies as if he expected some help, but he was met with innocent faces.  “I think Rachel is…  I think we may have misunderstanding brewing that should probably be set straight before she gets hurt.”

 

Shiloh bowed her head and smiled, catching his attention.

 

“Shiloh, you laughed earlier.  And though it was…” he tried to corral a wide grin, “cute, I don’t want her to start thinking that…well…I’m her father.  When she’s old enough to understand I’m not, she might be very hurt, considering her father is no longer with us.”

 

Shiloh looked over at Etta who looked positively mortified.  Before Etta could say anything, Shiloh spoke.  “Adam, I think it’s only natural for a little girl to favor the only man in her life, even if that man isn’t her father.  You have a very big presence in this house, and she feels it.  That makes you…well…the father-figure.”

 

“And you think that’s all right?  What happens when she realizes I’m not?”

 

“I think you’ll still be a father-figure just like Ben is to me.”

 

Raising his brows, Adam walked around behind his desk and took his seat.  “You’re different.  You were older than Rachel.   Old enough to remember your father.   I’m not sure she is, and even if she does, that memory will fade as she gets older.”

 

Both looked over at Etta, when she spoke.

 

“I…I…I’ll speak with her about it.  I just thought we…that she….  I guess I was hoping…to fit in better.”

 

Moving her arm around Etta’s shoulder, Shiloh hugged her into her side.  “Etta, it’s not a problem of fitting in.  You both fit in quite well.  It’s just that Mr. Cartwright doesn’t want Rachel to be hurt.  Still,” she said, looking over at Adam, “I don’t think it’s as troublesome as you think. Since she’s taken with you, maybe you should talk to her about the trip here.  See if she remembers her father, and then if she does, get her to talk about him.  Find out what she remembers.  You, too, Etta,” said Shiloh, turning quickly to Etta.  “Just make sure she knows who her father was.  I think if you do that, you’ll avoid any hurt, but Adam,” she said, turning back to her husband, “I don’t know that she won’t continue to gravitate toward you, just because you’re the male influence in her life.”

 

Adam narrowed his eyes.  “Who did you talk to and when?”

 

Shiloh looked down at her hands now in her lap and bit her lip before she moved her eyes back up to his.  “I spoke with Pa…a few days ago.”

 

Snorting, Adam bowed his forehead into his hand and rubbed his temples.  “How is he?”

 

She raised her head and shrugged.  “Why don’t you ask him yourself?”

 

His nostrils flared as he gave Shiloh a quick glare. “Etta, do you talk to Rachel about her father?”

 

Her slight smile quickly left as she looked away.  “I used to.  She was so young when he died, she didn’t really remember him, but she did remember the night he died…the storm and the water.  And being trapped.  She was having nightmares, so I stopped bringing it up.”

 

“Do you have a picture of him?” asked Shiloh.

 

“Yes.  It’s on my night table.”

 

Adam leaned forward.  “Does she ever ask about it?”

 

“No.  She mostly avoids it,” Etta answered.

 

“Pa said she’ll eventually understand when she’s old enough,” said Shiloh.  “We just need to give her time.”

 

Standing and without looking at her employers, Etta said, “I’ll try again.  Now, if you’ll excuse me, I should be helping Ming Lin clean up after dinner.”

 

Shiloh reached out for her hand to stop her and gave her a reassuring smile.  “Etta, there’s no reason to be anxious.  Your employment here is not in question.  We just don’t want Rachel to be hurt because she doesn’t understand.”  Both Shiloh and Adam could see Etta physically relax before she nodded and left the room.

 

Adam sat with his elbow propped on his desk, his fingers pinching his lips.  After Etta was out of earshot, he asked, “How’d he look?”

 

Studying her husband, Shiloh wondered if he was that concerned.  It seemed to her if he was really worried, he’d have already been over there.  “He looks tired, Adam.  How do you expect him to look between the extra work and the extra worry…about you and him.”

 

“Joe’ll be back next week,” Adam replied, rubbing his chin.  “With Hoss and Joe,” he shrugged, “he’ll be all right.”

 

“Will he?  You took a lot of supervisory work off your father’s shoulders besides the physical work, but he wasn’t idle.  And who’s going to handle all the business in San Francisco?  Who’s going to leave for weeks on end to charter lumber ships or bid contracts or negotiate cattle prices?”

 

Raising his brows, he answered emphatically, “Isn’t that the point?”

 

Exasperated, she spat, “Stubborn!”

 

“Kettle!” he shot back.

 

“You’re bigger than me.  You’re the kettle!”

 

The shock of her response quickly turned into an all out laugh, and when she scowled at him and stood, he quickly rose and grabbed her arm, pulling her against him as he sat on the edge of the desk.  Though she tried to push away, he was able to hold on now that the fingers of his right hand were free to move.

 

“Let go of me!”

 

“Not until you calm down.”

 

“The only thing that’s going to calm me down is you going over to Pa’s and ending this ridiculous argument.”

 

Taking a deep breath, Adam puckered his lips before he answered louder than he’d intended.  “How Pa runs his ranch is his business.  He’s made it clear he’s not interested in what I have to say.  And I have no intention of going back until he becomes interested.  Now simmer down,” he ended, giving her a slight shake.  When he saw her jaw was still obstinately set, he closed his eyes and blew a calming breath out through his nose.  “Shiloh, you should understand by now that it’s the Ponderosa Pa stands to lose.  I’m not doing this because I’m angry.  I’m doing this because I don’t want to see him lose everything he’s worked for his entire life.”

 

Closing her eyes, she leaned back while pushing her hands against his chest.

 

He let her go this time, and she turned to leave the room.  “Where are you going?”

 

She stopped, and keeping her back to him, she glanced his way over her shoulder. “For a walk.”

 

“It’s already dark,” he said.  “Don’t go far.”

 

She left without another word and walked out to the summer house.  Hugging a post, she watched the moon rise over the lake, its white light creating silvery sparkles on the little waves kicked up on the surface of the water by a light breeze.  Everything was going so well in their lives right now, but there was this ever present shadow hanging over them.

 

***

 

At the main house, the family had gathered for dinner around the table, and the prayer had been said.  All that could be heard were mumblings of politeness as they passed the serving dishes around the table or the clink and clatter of the silver on their plates.  From the outside looking in, it might have appeared that everyone at the table was exhausted.  The truth of it was that each one of them was both physically and mentally worn down with the strain of missing one man.  Even Annie was finding herself tired from her trips all over the eastern side of the Sierra treating patients.

 

On this particular night, Ben had poured himself a cup of coffee, but declined every serving dish passed his way.

 

It was Annie who spoke up.  “Pa, I know you’re tired, but you have to eat to keep your strength up.”

 

Ben looked at her and gave her a brief, sad smile.  “Maybe later.”

 

Joe and Hoss glanced at each other, and when Joe nodded toward their father, Hoss swallowed the food in his mouth and washed it down with water.  “Pa, I know you’re tired, but you ain’t never not had somethin’ to eat.  What’s botherin’ you?”

 

Clasping his hands in front of him, Ben looked at them for a moment.  “We have a lawsuit going on that I haven’t been able to pay much attention to.  Hiram sent a telegram saying it looked bad for us that none of us were there.  Ordinarily, I would have sent Adam. But as it is now, I can’t afford to leave, and I can’t afford to send either one of you.  We might just lose this one.”

 

“What happens if we lose?” asked Joe.

 

“It means we’ll have to pay a hefty penalty.  The last lumber we delivered was on time based on our interpretation of the contract, but the fellow we sold the lumber to is claiming we were late because of a stipulation in the contract that he could request one acceleration.  He claims he sent us notification a month before we delivered.  I never saw it.  It would have been something Adam would have handled.”

 

“Well, Pa, why don’t you ask Adam?” asked Hoss.  “If it was somethin’ he did before he….  If it was somethin’ he did, I don’t see any harm in askin’ him about it.”

 

“Hmf,” was the last thing Ben said on the matter.  “Annie, you’re running yourself into the ground trying to go to all these women.  Why don’t you consider opening a surgery…maybe somewhere central to Virginia City, Carson City and all the outlying areas?”

 

“Pa, I’d need a building somewhere on the eastern edge of the Ponderosa.  I don’t think you have any buildings there.  Paul offered to share his surgery, but that would only take care of Virginia City, and then everyone else would be further away.”

 

“Virginia City isn’t a bad idea.  Now that these women know you’ll go to them, they’ll continue to take advantage of you.  If they would really prefer to see you, they’ll make an effort to get to you.  And if not, they can always go to a male doctor.”

 

Speaking while chewing his food, Hoss said, “If that’s true, why don’t we have Adam add a surgery to the house plans.   Like Pa said, if they really wanna see you, they’ll come to you, and you just might get some patients from the settlements around the lake.”

 

“You’re still planning to move out?” asked Ben with furrowed brows.

 

“Well yeah, Pa.  But I’ll still be here to work.  Annie and me just won’t be living here in the house.”

 

Joe looked at his father trying to decide whether he should bring up Adam again.  He had no idea what the penalty would be if they lost this lawsuit, but based on his father’s sullen demeanor, he assumed it was big.  “Pa, Adam’s going to San Francisco next week.  And he’s taking Shiloh and Etta and the children, so he’s gonna be there for a while.  I think you should ask Adam if he can represent the Ponderosa in court.”

 

Ben gave his son a hard glare.  “I’m sure he’s just as busy as we are.”

 

Sitting up and wiping his mouth on his napkin, the corner of Hoss’s mouth turned up as he said, “As a matter of fact, Pa, he ain’t.  He’s hired some extra men, and he’s put the Flying W and all a his cattle together under Hank.  He’s got Jim Tyler buildin’ a sawmill, and he’s got Shorty and that Weller fella running the timber camps.  The mine still ain’t open yet, but Roy says he’s getting’ close to findin’ out who blew up the powder house.  Adam and Micah meet with all their foremen every mornin’ and go over all the work, and if it needs attention, they come to Micah, and if he can’t handle it, they go to Adam.  He rides out every other day to check on the work.”

 

A breath escaped Ben that everyone at the table imagined would be how someone’s last breath might sound. Even Annie watched him closely for an extended minute.  He said nothing.  He just stared toward his water glass on the table.  Finally, he gently placed his napkin on the table and slowly rose from his chair, going to his pipe stand by one of the red leather chairs, and then walking out the front door, closing it so softly that no one heard.

 

Joe looked worriedly over at Hoss.  “You think one of us should go after him?”

 

Shaking his head, Hoss said, “We gotta leave him to his thoughts.  Maybe he’ll decide Adam was right after all.  He just has to get there hisself.”

 

Chapter Twenty-Nine

 

A week before their trip to San Francisco, Shiloh and Etta were slowly getting everything ready they would need for themselves and the children.  When Shiloh told Etta they would be traveling by private coach, she was quite happy, almost excited about the trip.  It seemed past stagecoach travel had frightened Rachel fairly severely, and because of that Etta’s own strength during trips had been badly worn.

 

The ladies had taken a break for a few hours, giving Shiloh some time to add to a new song she had been working on.  The song was a duet meant to be sung by a man and a woman.  She could easily sing through both parts, but she needed to hear them together.  She knew no one near who would be able to sing the man’s part…except maybe one man, and he would likely say ‘no’. If she could just convince him to sing it just so she could hear it with the female part.

 

She turned back to her piano, and when Adam walked through the door, she glanced over, but continued playing.  She knew he would be coming over, and she would patiently wait.

 

Dropping a kiss on the top of her head, he waited and listened until she stopped playing.

 

After the last note, she sat still for a moment, savoring the fading resonance, then stood and greeted her husband properly.  Just as he moved toward her lips for a second kiss, she said in a seductively sweet voice, “Adam, would you…do…something for me?”

 

Lingering at her lips, he said, “Anything.”

 

“I have this new song, you see,” she said, stroking the muscles of his arms.  “It’s a duet, and I need to hear how it sounds with both voices.”

 

He gave her a full-on kiss, slightly moved away, and with a smile on his lips, he said, “No,” then turned to walk away.

 

“Wait.  Can’t we even discuss this?”

 

Looking back over his shoulder, he said once more with a smile, “No,” and continued away.

 

She plopped down on the piano seat.  “I’ve been working so hard on this song.  I might as well tear it up.”

 

Adam halted his escape, hung his head, and looked back at her without turning. He didn’t think he’d ever seen as sad a look as the one she was wearing now.  Closing his eyes and breathing in deeply, he folded his lips into a line knowing she was performing, but he just couldn’t resist turning back.

 

Her woeful look didn’t change.  “I’m not asking you to perform it in front of anyone…except me.  I just need to hear both parts together, and there’s no one else anywhere close who can sing this.  Except you.”  She stood and walked to him, moving her hands to his chest and leaning against him while looking pleadingly up into his eyes.  “Please?”
He watched as her eyes got bigger little by little, and when it seemed they couldn’t grow any larger, her brows crooked, her chin quivered, and he chuckled.

 

Her head cocked as her earnestness turned to injury while she struggled to untangle herself from his hands, and as much as she tried, his hands always found purchase, preventing her from backing away.  Though she struggled, he held her, finally pulling her firmly against him.  Exhausted, she slumped so that he was the only thing holding her up.

 

He hadn’t taken his eyes away from hers, though she tried not to look at him, and when she became motionless, he arched a brow.  “Are you done?”

 

He received a whimper in return.

 

Moving his hands to each side of her face, he turned it up to his. “This is the first time and the last.”  Before he could finish, she was bouncing on her toes excitedly, though he was still holding her face.  “Do we understand each other?”  Now with her face bobbing up and down in his hands, he couldn’t hide a grin that ended in a loud laugh at her antics, behavior reminding him of a time long past.

 

Shiloh went over the music with him, taking time to point out specific areas in the music.  “Can you roll your ‘r’s?”

 

“Of course, I can r-r-r-r-roll my ‘r’s.”

 

“Good.  Now, when we get here,” she said, pointing, “don’t worry if you can’t hit that high note.  Not many baritone’s can.  It’s more of a low tenor note.”  She had turned toward the piano and didn’t see his narrowed eyes.

 

Once she played their beginning notes, they began to sing, starting and stopping a few times to discuss the notations.  It was during this time that someone knocked on the door, though neither Adam nor Shiloh heard.  Ming Lin and Etta had come out of the kitchen when the singing began.  It was Ming Lin who answered the door, motioning for Ben, Hoss, Joe and Annie to enter.

 

Still Adam and Shiloh, who were facing each other, heard nothing, both concentrating on complementing the other’s voice while everyone else was mesmerized by the stunning harmonies.

 

If it were possible, Shiloh found herself falling in love all over again listening to Adam’s rich baritone.  She quickly realized his musical education involved more than he’d ever let on. And then when he effortlessly hit that high note and held it, her mouth dropped open as she staggered backward and dropped hard on the piano bench.  When he stopped, there was total silence in the room.  Little did Shiloh know that every other person present looked as stunned as she.

 

Adam’s eyes twinkled as he smiled down at his wife who managed to do no more than tilt her head and open and close her mouth, unable to come up with anything to say.

 

He held the music out to her, and she grabbed it, shooting up off the piano bench.  Just when she found her voice, he said, “We had an agreement.”

 

“But…”

 

Again, he took her face in his hands and kissed her.  “A deal is a deal,” he said, turning away, but stopping when he saw he had an audience who seemed just as speechless as Shiloh.  The next thing he heard was paper ripping.  He spun around and watched the torn pieces floating in the air around her.

 

“No.”

 

Shaking her head, she threw her hands in the air and let them fall to her side.  “It’s no use, Adam.  No one will ever be able to sing it to that…level.  And I don’t want to sing it with anyone else.”  His brows curved as his mouth opened slightly.  Shiloh answered his look. “Maybe I’ll let some other duo sing it, but I…I can’t.”  Looking into his eyes, she smiled.  “You were perfect.  We were perfect together.”   She motioned to the others standing in the entry of the house.  “I don’t think I’m biased.”

 

Adam turned and saw the bewilderment on all their faces change to expectation.  Without looking back at Shiloh, he said to all of them, “We had an agreement.”

 

Ming Lin and Etta hurried back to the kitchen while Annie made her way past Adam to Shiloh, giving her a long hug.  As Adam reached the entry, Hoss extended his hand first, followed by Joe.

 

Facing his father, the two men’s eyes locked.  Everyone held their breath until Adam said, “Why don’t we all have a drink?”  He stepped to one side and waited for his brothers and his father to move into the living area.  “To what do we owe this visit?” Adam asked, looking to the music room, beckoning Shiloh to him with his eyes.

 

When she and Annie arrived, Adam moved his arm around Shiloh and held her at his side as Annie sat in a chair Hoss indicated.

 

Upon hearing Adam sing, easily keeping up with Shiloh, sudden realization hit Ben like a ton of bricks giving him a feeling of shame at what he was only just understanding was selfishness.  He cleared his throat. “Adam, Shiloh, I don’t think I’ve ever heard anything quite so beautiful.  Adam…I had no idea you could sing…that…well.  I suppose there must be quite a bit I don’t know about you… or your time at college.”  He finally looked up at his son.  “You could very easily have chosen yet another direction.”

 

Looking down at Shiloh apologetically, Adam answered, “But I didn’t.  And I don’t intend to now.”

 

She closed her eyes disappointedly.

 

“Adam, I’ve been a fool.  I’ve been so focused on leaving everything to you boys, I neglected to ask if you wanted it.  I didn’t think that, perhaps, you’d want to build something that was your own…that you didn’t inherit.”

 

Adam kissed the top of Shiloh’s head, then brought her hand to his lips before he went to sit next to his father.  “That’s not it, Pa.”  He smiled, remembering when he asked Shiloh to marry him.  “Before we were married,” he said, looking up at his wife, “Shiloh said she wanted to leave her children a legacy of something tangible…the Flying W…just like you were leaving a legacy for us.”  He glanced over at Joe and Hoss.

 

Shiloh finished the story. “He asked me ‘What if the Ponderosa was part of their legacy?’  It took a minute for what he was asking to sink in.”

 

Moving a hand to his father’s arm, Adam said, “Pa, I never considered leaving the Ponderosa, at least, not for good.  Other business may take us away for a while, but we’ll always come home.  But like it or not, things are changing, and if we don’t change with them, everything you’ve worked for…everything that all of us want for our children will be eaten away until there’s nothing left.  I couldn’t just stand by and watch that happen.”

 

“Adam, we’ve always made promises…promises to the land,” said Ben.

 

“We don’t have to change what we do best, Pa.  We stay committed to the land.  After all, there’s just so much you can do with cattle, mines and timber.  We keep doing what we do…better…smarter.  We improve the feed, we improve our breeding practices, we improve our planting and irrigation.  We diversify.”

 

“Diversify?” said Ben, surprised. “We’ve never needed anything else.”

 

“Pa, if two of the three things we do well collapse, the third won’t hold us.  We’ve gotten too big.”

 

Ben studied his son…this man he’d always thought of as his inquisitive boy, this man he knew could do anything he set his mind to do, this man who was in touch with things he himself had never bothered considering.  “What are you suggesting?”

 

“Well, for starters, we should hire a foreman for each separate venture, so we can pay attention to the business side of things.  That doesn’t mean that Joe or I can’t keep breaking horses, if that’s what we want to do. It doesn’t mean that we don’t ride out every day to make sure the work’s getting done.  But we make sure we have men on the payroll who can do the physical work we’ve always done when we don’t have the time or inclination to do it.  Next, we need to invest in the railroad.  Crocker and his business partners are going to build that railroad if it kills them, and once they do, our cattle, our timber and even our ore can be clear across the country in only eight days.  If we invest, our costs will be lower, and we’ll make a profit in the overland shipping business.”

 

Ben sat back and crossed one leg over the other, patiently listening.

 

“I’m also going to build the dairy next year.  Besides being able to ship butter and cheese all over the country, it’s an investment in women like Annie and Shiloh, who won’t be satisfied without time for other pursuits.  For the short term, there isn’t another dairy in these parts that can supply large amounts of butter or cheese for the region, so wives and daughters make it for their family.  And there’s Shiloh’s horses.  She turns buyers away every year because she doesn’t have help to train which is something Hoss wants to learn.  And now men like James Haggin are interested in her horses even though he has his own horse breeding operation at Rancho Del Paso in the Sacramento Valley. That alone says a lot about the quality of her horses.”

 

Ben closed his eyes as if his head was spinning.  “Do you realize what it will take to put all of this in place?”

 

“I do, Pa.  It certainly can’t all be done overnight.”

 

“Pa,” said Hoss.  “You should tell ‘im why we’re here.”

 

Ben grunted as he pulled the lawsuit paperwork out of the inside pocket of his vest and handed it to Adam.  “We’re already behind on the Ponderosa.  I can’t leave, and I can’t afford to send Joe or Hoss.  But Hiram says we need to be represented.”

 

“We thought since you were leaving for San Francisco, you’d consider representing the Ponderosa,” said Joe with his usual easy-going smile.

 

Shaking his head, Adam looked over at Hoss and then Joe and smiled.  “So you managed to talk him into coming over here to ask if I would take care of it.”

 

Raising his brows, Ben said, “Well, if it isn’t too much trouble…”  It didn’t take long for a smile to steal across his lips.

 

Chuckling, Adam said, “Of course it’s not too much trouble. But what needs to be caught up here that none of you can go?”

 

“We’ve got our own timber contracts with the mines to fill,” said Ben.  “Hoss is taking care of those.  Joe’s been taking care of breaking horses for an Army contract, and I’m getting us ready for our second cattle drive.  On top of all of that is the normal paperwork that has to be done, plus I’ve got requests for bids on two more timber contracts that I haven’t even been able to look at.”

 

Adam rubbed his hand over his chin.  “Where are you taking the cattle?”

 

“Joe went south with the first drive,” replied Ben.  “This one will go to San Francisco.”

 

“The Flying W drive is going east, so no help there.”  Adam scratched the back of his neck.  “What if I take the timber bids with me and work on them in San Francisco?”

 

“Well, it won’t help with the work, but it will ensure we get those bids in.  If you can do that, Adam, the boys and I will manage.”

 

Adam smiled.  “I’ll come by and get them before we leave for San Francisco then.  And I’ll see if Micah can help with the paperwork.  He’s already seen most of it, so he shouldn’t have a problem with it.”

 

Ben stood.  “Micah’s help might just keep our heads above water.”

 

Standing with his father, Adam moved his hands to his hips.  “He can also start looking for candidates for foremen, Pa.  You need to get that in place as soon as possible.  Once you do that, the work will start easing up a bit for you, and then you can start thinking about what you’ve got available to invest in the railroad.  After that, I’ll arrange a meeting with Crocker and the others.”

 

Shiloh had left to tend to Abel, and now came down the stairs with the baby in her arms.  Passing Abel to his grandfather, she said, “Why don’t you all stay for dinner?   It will be nice to have the whole family around the dinner table again.”

 

Ben was grinning at his grandson.  “Joe, ride back over to the house and tell Hop Sing we won’t be home for dinner tonight.”

 

“Yes sir,” Joe said, winking at Adam and Shiloh.

 

Chapter Thirty

 

The household of Adam Cartwright was up early running to and fro to get all the bags, baskets and baby necessities into the black coach Micah had purchased for Shiloh the previous year.  Though morning’s light hadn’t broken through night’s darkness yet, both Ben and Annie were there to see the eldest Cartwright’s family off.

 

“Shiloh, I wanted to show you this so you know you’re getting what you ask for.”  Annie opened the medical catalog and flipped to a page.  “This is a speculum, this is a dilator, and these are forceps.”

 

“What if they have different kinds and sizes?” asked Shiloh as she brought the catalog closer to see the small pictures.

 

Annie handed her the catalog.  “Just take it with you.  And if there are different sizes get several.”  She took the catalog back and flipped through the pages again, stopping and turning the book around so Shiloh could see a picture.  “Do you think you’ll have room for this?” she asked, bouncing her finger on a picture.  I need two of these.”

 

“Annie, I don’t know.  That’s pretty big.  What is it?”

 

“It’s a birthing table.  It’s supposed to be a new design.  See the cushions?”

 

Smiling, Shiloh took the catalog, bent the corner of the page and placed the book in a valise just before Adam loaded it.  “If we can’t bring them back, we’ll have them shipped.  Either way, you’ll get your birthing tables.  But where are you going to put them?”

 

Hoss said he was going to talk to Adam about building a surgery at the house.  Only I don’t think I want it at the house.  I think it needs to be closer to the eastern side of the mountains.”

 

Shiloh said nothing, but continued to smile.

 

“Do I have a wart?”

 

Laughing, Shiloh answered, “No. It’s just good to see you excited about this.”  She held both of Annie’s hands in hers.  “Adam can draw some examples of a surgery without knowing exactly where it will be built.  You just need to decide where you want it before he actually starts the plans, so he knows what to do for the foundation.”  While the women hugged, Shiloh added, “So think about it and let him know when we get back.”

 

“Pa, do you want me to mail the pricing for the contracts back?” asked Adam.

 

“If you get it done quickly, yes,” said Ben.  “Our deadline is a month out, but it would be better for us if we could tender our bids early.”

 

“All right.  And if a decision is needed for the lawsuit, say if they want to settle?”

 

“I’ll leave that to your judgment.  You’ve handled these lawsuits enough to know.  But speak to Hiram.  If they want to settle, make sure we get our money’s worth.”  Ben gave Adam a firm pat on the back, stopping his hand on Adam’s shoulder and squeezing.  “Adam, I should have listened from the beginning.”

 

Raising his hand, Adam stopped his father.  “Pa, I imagine when you see things begin to change from what you’ve done successfully all your life, it’s easy to think you don’t need to change with them.”  He smiled and looked up into the lightening sky. “We’re never too old to learn, are we?”

 

Ben chuckled.  “No, I suppose not.”

 

“Adam, this is the last of it,” said Shiloh, lifting a valise up in front of her.

 

He took the bag from her.  “Are you sure you don’t want to bring the furniture?”

 

“I need diapers for Abel, and his blankets, and all his clothes because I don’t know anything about the laundry situation where we’re staying.  If you’d tell me, maybe I’d feel comfortable leaving some of this behind,” she said as she tiptoed up to him.

 

Giving her a quick kiss, he said, “We don’t have time to unpack.  It’s time to go.”

 

Right on cue, Etta came out of the house with Abel in her arms and Rachel trailing behind, dragging a doll.  Ming Lin followed with a basket of sandwiches.  Turning, he closed the door behind him.

 

Shiloh had already said goodbye to her father-in-law, and before Adam passed Abel to her in the coach, Ben kissed his grandson on the head and lightly pinched his nose, causing a laugh that was quickly stifled by a fist in his mouth and a puzzled look as Abel wondered why he could no longer make any loud sounds.

 

Lifting Rachel up to the coach entry, Adam held on until she was completely inside the coach before he stepped aside to help Etta up.  Ming Lin had already climbed up on the seat next to the driver who was one of the guards Adam had hired to take Shiloh to Salt Lake City the year before.  A second guard rode along next to the coach.

 

“Pa, Hiram’s telegram said court would resume on the July 6th.  We should be there in plenty of time,” Adam said, shaking his father’s hand.

 

“Good.  I’d like you to be sitting next to Hiram when it’s called to order.  That should shake old Haskins up a bit.”

 

Stepping up into the coach and closing the door, Adam leaned out the window.  “Don’t worry.  If Hiram’s only problem is what the jury thinks about our lack of presence, he’ll probably have the case in hand fairly quickly.”  He waved goodbye as the coach moved down the track toward the main road.

 

Adam had insisted that Shiloh’s jewelry be packed in a small bag which was placed behind a panel in one of the seats.  He didn’t tell Shiloh, but he was also transporting several thousand dollars and a bag of silver bullion valued at twenty-five thousand dollars, all of which was hidden behind a similar panel in the opposite seat.  He carried only two hundred in his wallet, but had another five hundred in his boot.   Roy had told him a week before the trip that there had been several stage coach robberies between Placerville and Lake Tahoe, so he was taking no chances with sending the bullion on the stagecoach.  He’d worked late into the night fashioning the removable panels in the seats of his private coach so they could not be easily seen.

 

Everyone was quiet all the way to Friday’s Station except  Abel who just wouldn’t sit still.  He tired his mother’s arms out bouncing as he babbled, slobbering to the point that she moved his blanket over the front of her dress to avoid getting soaked.

 

Etta sat next to Shiloh at the other window and offered to take Abel, but Adam took him instead, indulging his son in a conversation of babble and grunts as he bounced the child until Abel was worn down himself.

 

Finally, Abel dove into his father’s shoulder, wiping his face back and forth on Adam’s black vest as he pulled Adam’s string tie. His eyes fixed upon his father’s face, his little hand now pulling Adam’s lower lip out and letting it go, until his hand dropped, followed shortly by his eyelids.

 

Shiloh had watched the entire struggle, and smiled lovingly at her son at the same time Adam watched her.  How could he ever tell her how thankful he was that she had given him a son.

 

She caught his eyes and from the silent conversation they shared, she knew.

 

Etta watched her employers as she gently stroked Rachel’s hair. The child had laid her head on her mother’s lap and was sound asleep before they were off the Ponderosa.  Looking out the window, she smiled. These two had many discussions, both calm and heated, but there was never any doubt how well they fit together or how fair-minded they were.  It was no wonder that Rachel was comfortable around both of them.

 

Moving to the opposite seat next to Adam, Shiloh looked into the back of Abel’s diaper, then stuck her finger in.  “He’s wet.  I need to change him.”

 

Narrowing his eyes, Adam softly said, “Let him sleep.”

 

“Do you have a clean pair of trousers handy?  Because if you don’t chances are you’ll be wearing a wet pair into whatever hostel we’ll be staying at tonight if you don’t let me change him now.  And I’ll let you take care the rash he’ll get.”

 

Bouncing his head to one side, Adam puckered his lips in acquiescence.  As he gently lifted Abel off his shoulder, the baby curled into the fetal position.

 

Shiloh had already moved all the way over to the side of the coach and took Abel, lying him on his blanket on the seat between her and Adam.  She pointed to the small valise leaning against the middle of the opposite seat.

 

While Adam searched for a diaper, Shiloh asked for the jar of flour Hop Sing had sent with Ben, and when both were present, she deftly removed the wet diaper, dampened a cloth with water from the canteen, cleaned and dried, and then applied the clean diaper, sprinkling it with flour before she fastened it, all without waking the baby.

 

“Adam, would you move Rachel up on the seat?  She’s liable to get a permanent bend in her side if she sleeps that way much longer,” Shiloh said, smiling and winking at Etta.

 

By the time the coach stopped in front of Friday’s Station, it was light. As the travelers disembarked each one paused, turning their faces up to the welcome warmth of the sun.  Burke Friday was there, making sure the ladies stepped down safely, but with Adam there, there wasn’t much room for Burke.

 

“Looks like you’ve already taken care of things here,” said Burke.

 

Adam offered his hand.  “Burke, how’ve you been?”

 

“Oh, can’t complain, Adam.  You don’t usually stop here.  Everything all right?”

 

Nodding, Adam answered as he followed Shiloh, who was holding Abel, with his eyes, “Yeah, I thought the ladies might enjoy a stretch.  And I got your telegram about the barn.  You can build a barn that big without any supports in the middle, but you’ll need some big cross beams.”

 

“I figured as much.  You don’t suppose you and your pa could supply the beams, do you?” asked Burke.

 

“We can, but you’ll have to send us the plans for the barn so we can figure the load.”

 

Both men turned their heads toward the sound of a baby crying.  Shiloh passed Abel to Etta as she started to climb into the coach, but Adam took two long steps, taking her arm and guiding her up.

 

“Thank you,” she said, smiling.  Lowering her voice, she added, he’s hungry.”  She took Abel from Etta and ducked inside, pulling the curtains down over the windows, then settled in on the far side of the coach.  Abel was still nursing by the time Adam followed Etta and Rachel into the coach.

 

The coach stopped near the top of Johnson’s Summit, so the ox teams could be tied on to pull the coach up the steepest part of the grade.  Adam got out and supervised while the women and children remained inside the coach. Once at the top with the oxen untied, Etta passed sandwiches out to Ming Lin and the two guards before they continued on their way.

 

Their last stop for the night was Strawberry Lodge.  At the front desk, Adam said, “I’ll need three rooms and space for my coach in your barn.”

 

“There’s room in the barn for your coach, mister, but we only have two rooms left.  After that we’re booked all up.”

 

A man waiting behind Adam leaned forward and said, “I’ll take one of those rooms.”

 

Glancing back at the man, Adam flared his nostrils before he turned back to the clerk.  “I’ll take both rooms.”

 

“That’ll be five dollars,” said the clerk.

 

Adam glared at the clerk, prompting to clerk to shrug.

 

“That’s the going rate.”  He pointed to the next man in line.  “He’ll pay it.”

 

Taking a deep breath, Adam pulled a gold piece out of his pocket and smacked it down on the counter, then picked up the pen and signed the register.

 

When he turned, the man behind him grabbed his arm. “Mister, ain’t no call for you hogging the last two rooms.”

 

Shrugging the man’s hand away, Adam said, “I have four men, two women, and two children.  The men get one room. The women and children get the other.  Now, if you’ll excuse me….” Stepping close to one of the guards as he passed out keys, he said in a low voice, “I’m betting he’s gonna stay in the barn tonight. Mark, when you and Keith move the coach to barn, empty one of the valises with my clothes and swap the clothes for everything under the seats. Bring the valise to the room.  Then you and Keith take turns watching the coach tonight.  I don’t want to go out tomorrow morning and find the trunks turned inside out. Don’t let anyone see you.”

 

Both guards were dressed in black trousers, white shirts with black string ties, and black jackets. People assumed they were either business associates or were very efficient at whatever Adam paid them to do.  Those present in the lodge lobby, including the man in line who didn’t get a room, watched as Mark nodded, motioned to Keith to follow, and left through the front door.

 

“Adam, is something wrong?” Shiloh asked as she appeared at his side.

 

He watched until the door closed behind the guards, making sure they weren’t followed, then smiled down at his wife while raising his hand to gently cup the back of Abel’s head.  “They’re getting a couple more bags.  They’ll be back directly.  “Now, let’s get you settled in the dining room.  I’ll take the bags here up to the room, and then join you.”

 

As they ate dinner, one of the owners, Ira Berry, stopped by the table to welcome the Cartwrights to the lodge.  Mr. and Mrs. Cartwright, we’re very happy you stopped to stay with us.  If my memory serves me we’ve never had the pleasure of accommodating any of your family.”

 

“Well, Mr. Berry, we usually camp on the way to Sacramento, but we aren’t prepared for that this trip,” said Adam after he stood and accepted Mr Berry’s hand.  Adam was all too aware of Mr. Berry’s reputation of feeding the horses of his guests straw instead of hay, the main reason why none of the Cartwrights ever stayed at the lodge.  “Would you make sure my horses get the grain I purchased instead of hay.”

 

A strained smile formed on Berry’s lips.  “Of course, Mr. Cartwright.”

 

“One more thing.  I have a man staying with our coach tonight. I wouldn’t want your man to be startled.”

 

By this time, Berry’s smile was gone.  “Of course not, Mr. Cartwright.  Now, if you’ll excuse me,” ended Berry.  He turned and hurried away.

 

Shiloh regarded her husband when he resumed his seat.  If you knew this place was this bad, why did we stop here?”

 

“The lodge isn’t bad, though the service can be questionable. And we probably wouldn’t have found anything better.  The hotels along this road fill up fast when the sun sets.”  He took a sip of coffee.  “If everyone is finished, we should get the children settled. We still have a long way to go tomorrow.”

 

By the time they arrived at the room, Abel was already asleep, having begun to fade as his mother and father were finishing their dinner.  With the baby surrounded by pillows and rolled up blankets on the bed Shiloh would sleep on, Adam and Shiloh left him in Etta’s capable hands for the few minutes they would need to say goodnight.

 

A walk in the moonlight took them down a path to the river flowing behind the lodge where they sat for a short time listening to the gurgle of the water.  Adam moved his arm around her as she laid her head on his shoulder.

 

“Will we make Sacramento by tomorrow?” she asked after a yawn.

 

“No.  We’ll stop in Placerville for the night.  We’ll make Sacramento the day after.”

 

“I don’t remember it taking this long,” she said.

 

He hugged her tightly against him.  We’ve never had children along.  I wish there’d been another room available.  I know you don’t sleep well without me.”

 

Turning her face up to his, she smiled as she looked into concerned eyes.  “I’ll be fine. Please don’t worry.”

 

Moving his hand to her jaw line, he bent and gave her a slow kiss. “I’m sure we’ll be able to get a separate room in Placerville.”  With raised brows, he took a deep breath.  “But right now, we need to turn in.  We’ll be starting early tomorrow.”

 

After kissing her once more at her door, they said goodnight.

 

 

Chapter Thirty-One

 

Standing up from the dining room table, Adam pulled out a chair for Rachel first, waited for her mother to tuck her napkin into the collar of her dress, then pulled a chair out for Etta.  He looked toward the door, then back at Etta.  “Where’s Shiloh?”

 

“Abel was very fussy this morning.  He fell asleep before his dinner and slept until you woke him this morning, so he was more hungry than usual.

 

Adam sat down while listening to Etta.

 

“Everything is packed and ready to go.  I laid their clothes out, so all they had left to do was dress.  And Ming Lin is in the kitchen arranging for sandwiches for lunch.”

 

Raising his eyebrows, Adam only nodded.  There wasn’t anything in the immediate that hadn’t been handled and quite capably at that.  But when one of the guards walked purposefully to the table, excused the interruption, and then bent to say something for Adam’s ears only, Adam excused himself from the table, stepping away with the guard.

 

Adam stood with his arms crossed over his chest. “So he tried to ransack the coach.”  The guard smiled and nodded. “I assume you sent him on his way.”

 

“Yes sir. After we gave him a little taste of what he’d get if we saw him again.”  When Adam narrowed his eyes, the guard continued, “Let’s just say he’s not gonna be comfortable in the saddle for awhile.” Adam’s brows furrowed and his mouth opened slightly, making the guard chuckle.  “Don’t worry boss.  We just had a little fun with the buggy whip.”

 

“Let’s just hope he doesn’t have friends down the road,” said Adam with one brow arched.  He didn’t mind horseplay that might garner a second round ordinarily, but then he was usually traveling with his brothers, not his wife and child.

 

By the time Adam returned to the table, Shiloh and Abel had arrived as well as Ming Lin, though Ming Lin couldn’t stay as Chinese were not allowed in the dining room.  In fact, they were allowed in the lodge only as servants. In this case, what the proprietor didn’t know wasn’t going to hurt him.  Ming Lin stopped by the table only to retrieve the valise Etta was watching for him and continued on to the coach with a basket of food in his other hand.

 

“Ladies, are we ready to leave?” asked Adam, his words just a bit short.

 

Shiloh instantly stopped what she was doing, her head snapping toward her husband.  “Is something bothering you?” she asked gently.

 

Drawing his mouth into an exaggerated frown, Adam complained, “I had planned to be on the road before the stagecoach passed by here, but that happened almost an hour ago.  And the second stagecoach just went by.”

 

“Are we in a race?” asked Shiloh, rolling her eyes.

 

“No, we are not,” he said, pushing himself up from the table.  “I’m going to square our bill.  I’d like you two to be on your way to the coach by the time I get back.  It’s already out front.”  He didn’t wait for a reply, but turned and left the dining room.

 

Shiloh watched him leave, then turned to Etta.  “That was odd.  Something’s definitely bothering him.”

 

Everyone sat quietly in the coach as it pulled out into the traffic moving west on Johnson’s Road.  Shiloh refused to look at Adam, having noticed he had taken his gun out of the baggage and was now wearing it.  She didn’t want to ask for fear whatever he was expecting would upset Etta and Rachel, but still she knew he was expecting trouble, and that trouble had something to do with those two stagecoaches that had passed at the lodge.

 

When she finally looked at him, she realized he had been watching her.  He motioned for her to move beside him, and when she did, he moved his arm around her, pulled her close, and kissed the side of her head.  “Don’t worry.”

 

Holding Abel to her, she said, “When you stop worrying, I’ll stop.  And don’t think I didn’t notice you pass a rifle up to Ming Lin.”

 

Moving his eyes toward Etta, he watched her as he lowered his head so that his mouth was at Shiloh’s ear.  “There’ve been some robberies between the basin and Placerville, so I’d like to stay away from the stagecoaches.  But since they’re ahead of us, I want to be prepared if we catch up at a bad time.”

 

Shiloh looked down at Abel with sudden fear for her child.  She understood now why Adam had spent so much time on the storage underneath the seats the evening before they left home.  What she still didn’t know was that Adam had brought silver bullion along besides the cash and jewelry she knew about.  Even so, at the moment, there was nothing any of them could do but wait and see if there would be trouble.  And so, they rode in silence.

 

It was only after Adam moved to the seat beside the driver and Shiloh asked for a gun that she knew he had planned for the worst long before they left home.  He didn’t argue. He pulled down a piece of their baggage and pulled out her own gun along with a box of cartridges.

 

As he loaded the gun for her, he spoke quietly.  “If shooting starts get Etta and the children on the floor on the front side of the coach.  And I don’t want you leaning out of the windows.”

 

“Why are you giving me a gun if I can’t use it? she asked, slightly perturbed.

 

Normally, he’d be amused by her frustration, but his voice remained detached which frightened her even more.  “You’ve never shot a moving target, so you’d be wasting ammunition.  But if one of them comes along side the coach, you should have an easy shot.”

 

She accepted the gun, hiding it in the folds of her skirt as she took a step backward, seating herself and quietly asking Etta to move to the forward seat with the children.  With the look that passed between them, Etta instantly understood that she was to protect the children.  No words would be spoken for fear of frightening Rachel in particular.

 

Mark, the guard who was driving the coach kept the horses going at a fairly brisk pace, so fast, in fact, that as they rounded a long bend in the road it was all he and Adam could do to stop the horses before they ran headlong into the back of a stagecoach stopped in the road.  The horses wanted to veer to one side, and Mark strained, pulling the lines to keep the horses away from hefty trees on either side of the road while Adam made sure Mark wasn’t pulled out of the box.

 

The sudden pitch of the coach threw Ming Lin off the top, sending him rolling into a ditch.  Those inside the coach were unseated, finally settling on the floor.

 

Keith, the other guard, left the road behind the coach, making his way deftly through the trees out of sight of the stagecoach.  He quickly dismounted, pulling his rifle out of its scabbard and finding a position on the ground where he had a clear shot at anyone who went near the door of the coach.

 

By the time Mark and Adam had the coach stopped, a man stood on either side with their rifles leveled at the two men in the box.  Adam and the guard could do nothing but raise their hands.

 

“Gents, would you please throw your guns down off the coach?” said a man who rode past the stagecoach, stopping in front of the coach.

 

Adam and Mark did as they were told.

 

“You inside the coach.  Throw your guns out,” the man shouted.

 

“There are only women and children inside the coach,” replied Adam calmly.

 

When Shiloh heard Adam’s response, she moved her gun into the valise containing Abel’s diapers, burying the gun in the bottom.

 

Though the man who seemed to be in charge smiled, his voice continued to carry an officious tone.  “Sir, if you would be so kind as to help the women out of the coach.”

 

“I assure you, they can do you no harm.”

 

Straightening in his saddle the bandit on the horse replied, “I’m afraid I must insist.  I would rather not be surprised if you are the type of man who might lie about such things.”

 

Adam shrugged and climbed down from the box.  He opened the coach door, took Abel from his mother’s arms, then took her hand, holding it as she stepped down.

 

As soon as her feet were firmly on the ground she took a step toward the mounted man.  “I beg of you, sir, please allow my sister and her child to remain in the coach.  The child, you see, is terrified of you.”

 

The man smiled at Shiloh, his smile genuine enough to make it to his eyes.  “You have the sound of a well-bred southern woman.”

 

Taking Abel from Adam after he stepped to her side, she replied rather haughty, “I assure you, sir, though I was born in the south, I do not consider myself a southern woman.  I was just an infant when my parents left the south forever.”

 

Adam sighed loudly and clenched his teeth.

 

With his smile gone, the man on the horse turned away, but looked back.  “My apologies for disturbing you and the child, madam.  Ask your sister to bring her child out of the coach.  I must insist that it be searched.”

 

When Shiloh stepped forward again, Adam took her arm and stopped her, and when she spoke anyway, he squeezed her arm tightly enough that she cringed.  “I don’t understand.  We have nothing in the coach of value,” she managed despite Adam’s vice grip on her arm.

 

“My dear, you are riding in a private coach.  I find it hard to believe you have nothing of value.”  Nodding a man toward the coach, he continued, “I’m only interested specifically in cash and bullion.  This won’t take long, I assure you.”

 

In the background darkness, Keith swore under his breath.  The Cartwrights were standing in his sight to the coach door.

 

When the man opened the door, he politely extended his hand, helping Etta down, a task made most difficult by Rachel clinging to her.  Adam pulled her over next to him with Shiloh who turned, holding Abel between she and Etta, and hiding Rachel between the skirts of their dresses so that she could neither see nor be seen.

 

Adam maintained his calm facade though he held his breath until he almost burst when the man stepped out of the coach.

 

Shaking his head, the man walked back to the stagecoach.

 

The man on the horse regarded Adam.  “Now why would a man be traveling in such appointment without a commensurate amount of money for his trip?”

 

Having reached the depth of his tolerance, Adam no longer addressed the man with even a hint of a smile.  “A man who cherishes his family would let the stagecoach assume the risk instead of putting his wife and child in harm’s way.”

 

The man’s mouth opened wide in understanding before he laughed.  “Of course he would.”  Looking forward to one of the men up at the stagecoach, who nodded and mounted his horse, the one in charged tipped his hat and rode forward, leaving two men to ensure Adam or Mark didn’t try to stop them.  The apparent robbery ended as quietly as it had transpired.

 

It was only when the bandits rode away that Adam realized there was a second stagecoach stopped in front of the one ahead of his coach.  “Mark, stay here.  Find Ming Lin.”  He wasn’t worried about Keith.  It was Keith’s job specifically to protect the women and children, and Adam was sure he was out in the darkness with a gun trained on anyone who might have raised a hand to harm them.

 

Walking forward, he found Ned Blair and Charlie Watson trying to reassure their passengers that the holdup was over.  “Ned, Charlie, you fellas all right?”

 

“Adam,” said Charlie, surprised.  “Didn’t know it was you, but prob’ly should have considerin’ the missus don’t like the stage.  Or maybe my drivin’.”

 

Smiling and scratching his nose, Adam holstered the gun he had picked up on the way.  “It has nothing to do with the coach…more the crowd in the coach.  What’d they get?”

 

“Strong box along with six bags of bullion.”

 

Adam whistled and glanced back at his coach. “What about from your passengers?”

 

“A fellow stood there with his rifle at the door, but he didn’t ask for anything,” said Watson.  “Just the strong box.  But they had to look for the bullion.  They knew what they were lookin’ for.”

 

Ned held out a piece of paper.  “Damnedest thing, Adam.  Take a look at this.”

 

Striking a match and holding it close to the paper Ned Blair handed him, he read it.  “June 30, 1864  This is to certify that I have received from Wells Fargo & Co. the sum of blank cash for the purpose of outfitting recruits in California for the Confederate States Army.  Signed R. Henry Ingrim, Captain, Commanding Co., C.S.A.”  He looked up at both men with his jaw crooked.  “You’re kidding.”

 

“You read it just like us.”

 

Mark came up behind Adam.  “Mr. Cartwright, Ming Lin has some cuts and bruises, but he’ll be all right.  Mrs. Cartwright has him in the coach tending him.”

 

Nodding, Adam turned back to the stagecoach drivers.  “He left a blank for the amount of money.  How much did they get?”

 

“The bullion alone was around forty thousand,” said Charlie.

 

“All right.  We’d best get these coaches into Placerville and get them unloaded,” said Adam.  “I’ll get my wife settled at Cary’s, and then meet you at the sheriff’s office. The quicker we talk to him, the quicker he can put together a posse.”

 

Chapter Thirty-Two

 

Ned Blair, Charlie Watson and Adam Cartwright occupied chairs in front of Sheriff William Rogers, each man telling the sheriff what he witnessed.

 

“I got there first,” said Ned.  “They thought I had the strong box, but Charlie here,” he said nudging Watson with his elbow, “had it on his stage.  They searched the stage and found the four bags of silver I was carrying, and by that time, Charlie came up behind me.”

 

Charlie sighed.  “It was pretty much the same for me.  They got the strong box and 2 more bags of silver.  And then Mr. Cartwright stopped in his coach.”

 

The sheriff leaned back in his chair.  “Adam, private coach?”

 

Adam chuckled.   “Yeah, Bill.  For Shiloh.”

 

Nodding, Sheriff Rogers asked, “So what’d they get from you?”

 

“Nothing but a few frayed nerves.”

 

“Then why are you here?”

 

Adam stood and walked around his chair, placing both hands on the straight back and leaning on it.  “Well, because I was a witness.  We’ve already discussed this,” he said, nodding toward Ned and Charlie.  “They knew what they were looking for.  They didn’t take anything from any of the passengers.  They didn’t ask for Shiloh’s wedding band nor did they ask for my wallet which has several hundred dollars in it.   They didn’t even do a thorough search of my coach or they would have found a bag of silver I’m carrying.”

 

Ned laid the receipt the Confederate officer had given him.  “They were Confederate soldiers, Sheriff.”

 

Rogers looked at the door when two deputies came in the office, then turned back to the three men.  “How do you know they weren’t just dressed as Confederates?”

 

Moving his hat to his head, Adam said, “The way the man in charge…the one who made out that receipt spoke to my wife…he referred to her as a well-bred southern woman.  He was a gentleman.”

 

“Yeah,” said Charlie.  “His men wanted to shoot my passengers at first, but this Captain fella, he stopped ’em.  Said they weren’t common bandits.”

 

Rogers thought for a moment before he addressed his deputies. “Joe, put together a posse as quick as you can.  We’ve got a double stagecoach robbery.”  As the deputies left the office, Rogers asked, “Where will you fellas be if I need more information?”

 

Charlie stood up and tapped Ned on the shoulder to do the same.  “We’ll have to stay overnight until the telegraph office opens up so we can notify the home office.  After that, we’ll be on our normal route.  If you need us, you’ll have to contact the main stage office.”

 

“We’ll be staying the night…at the Cary House, ” said Adam.  “But we’ll also be leaving in the morning.  I’ll be in San Francisco.  You can contact me through the Ponderosa attorney, Hiram Faulkner.”

 

“One last thing,” said Sheriff Rogers while buckling his gun belt.  “Which way’d they go?”

 

“Don’t have any idea,” said Charlie.  “They went on around the bend.”

 

Furrowing his brows, Adam tapped a finger on the desk.  “They didn’t continue west.  They’d have ended up here.  And they didn’t go behind us, they went forward.  The only other direction they could have gone from the bend would be southeast.”

 

“All right.  I’ll send some men southeast, and I’ll have some go up to the bend and try to track them from there.  Thank you for your time,” said the sheriff, holding the door open as an invitation for them to leave.

 

Adam shook both stage drivers’ hands.  “You usually go straight through, don’t you?  Do you have a place to stay tonight?”

 

Ned scratched his head.  “Well, the company sometimes puts us up over at the Jackass, but I’m thinking we’ll get more rest on the bunks in the back of the stage office.  That Jackass Inn can get pretty loud at night with all the comin’s and goin’s.”

 

Smiling, Adam said, “Good night then.”

 

When he arrived at the hotel, he checked Etta’s door, first trying the doorknob, and then listening for any sound.  Next, he went by the guard’s room and lightly tapped.  “I’m in.  Get some sleep.”

 

“How’d it go with the sheriff?” asked Mark.

 

Adam shrugged.  “He’s putting together a posse to go out tonight, but I doubt we’ll hear anything before we leave tomorrow.”

 

“Keith and I will make sure the coach is ready early.  Good night.”

 

Finally, Adam opened the door to his suite.  The lamps had been dimmed and both bedroom doors were closed.  Quietly, he turned the doorknob and eased open the door to the room he would share with Shiloh and Abel, stopping when he saw her sitting on the end of the bed with her bare back to him.  He could tell she held Abel in her arms by the way her head was bent to the side.  His lips parted as he drew in a silent breath at the sight of her, her curls hanging loosely down her back, the lines of which slanted gracefully inward from her shoulders to her waist.  He could just hear her humming so lightly that he hadn’t heard her when he first stepped into the room, but he was sure that his son was either quietly listening or had already lost his battle with sleep.

 

Closing the door just as quietly as he had opened it, he moved silently across the carpeted floor and eased down on the bed next to her which caused her to lean his way.  When his fingers moved lightly across her back and cupped her shoulder, she glanced at him and blushed before she turned back to Abel who was still nursing, though it was apparent he was fading fast.

 

“Did you have any trouble getting everyone settled?” he asked softly.

 

Taking a deep breath, she answered just as quietly.  “Rachel is upset.  I’m sure she’ll have nightmares tonight.  Etta tried to get her to eat something, but she wouldn’t, so Etta took her on to bed.  And I called a doctor for Ming Lin.  He was complaining about a headache and stumbled several times, so I was worried.”

 

“Where did you find a doctor who’d see him?” Adam asked, creasing his forehead.

 

She took another deep breath and wearily closed her eyes.  “I asked a young Chinese man who works here at the hotel if there was a Chinese doctor in town.  He brought him.  The doctor said that Ming Lin had head sickness which I assume is a concussion.  He is to ride in the coach tomorrow with his head propped on a pillow.  He also prepared some herbs for Ming Lin to take with water. I’ll find another doctor to check on him again when we get to Sacramento.”

 

Adam stood and took Abel when the baby finally lost his fight.  He gently lay him on the small cot he had requested when he arranged for the rooms before going to the sheriff’s office.  By the time Adam had Abel covered and turned back toward the bed, Shiloh had crawled up to the pillows and was already fast asleep.  With a smile on his face, he watched her snuggle into the pillow as he undressed, blew out the lamp and crawled in next to her.

 

It was in the wee hours of the morning that he missed her presence next to him.  When his eyes adjusted to the dark, he realized that a lamp had been lit, but burned low.  Off in the dimness, he found her slowly pacing back and forth with her robe loosely hanging off her arms, and Abel at her breast.

 

Contented to wait for her return, he closed his eyes as sleep beckoned to him, but occasionally opened them to watch her.

 

Bringing Abel to her shoulder, she gently rubbed his back until he burped loudly, causing Adam to chuckle and shake his head.  The baby quickly fell back to sleep, and once his mother covered him on his cot, she blew out the lamp and returned to the bed.

 

As she settled against Adam, he moved his arms around her so that her head rested on his shoulder.  No words were spoken, but Adam began to drift off first thinking he couldn’t imagine living without her.  But his brow furrowed as he succumbed to sleep with his last thought that he’d have to have a possibly unpleasant conversation with her tomorrow.

 

When he woke the next morning, Shiloh was already up and dressed and had their bags mostly packed.  He sat up and ran his fingers back through is hair.  “Good morning.”

 

She stopped and smiled at him, then continued packing.

 

“I’m awake.  You don’t have to be quiet.”

 

She put the last of her things in a valise and went toward the door.  “I ordered breakfast in the room.  I thought it would be quicker to make sure everyone ate than trying to get Rachel and Ming Lin something in the restaurant.  Would you let Mark and Keith know they can come here to eat?”

 

He quickly rolled off the bed and stood in front of the door, preventing her from leaving.  Moving a hand to the side of her face, he bent and kissed her, but all he received in turn was a brief smile.  “Out with it,” he breathed.

 

“I’m ready for this trip to be over.  Ming Lin’s hurt, Rachel’s terrified, and I’m not sure Etta or I can calm her down.”

 

Moving his arms around her, he leaned back on the door, causing her to fall into him.  Still, she looked away.  “If you think it will help, I’ll talk to Rachel.”

 

“Thank you,” she said softly.

 

“What else?”

 

She took a deep breath. “There’s nothing else.”

 

“Really?  I don’t think that’s quite true.”  He pushed his bottom lip up.  “Maybe you think I won’t talk to you about last night if you mope around.”

 

Pushing away, she said in an indifferent tone, one that surprised Adam with the lack of fight in it, “I thought you wanted to get an early start.”

 

“Shiloh, when are you going to learn to keep your mouth shut?”

 

She looked back at him, and even though he still had a smile on his face, she shook her head.  “I’m the same woman you married.  And you promised you wouldn’t try to change me.”  Abel stirred, and she went to check his diaper, finding it wet and gathering the things she needed to change him.

 

“I don’t have a problem with you speaking your mind when there isn’t a man pointing a gun at you…and Abel.”

 

Finishing Abel’s diaper, she lifted him off the cot, smiled and tweaked his nose and passed him to Adam, saying quietly, “I suppose you’ve never said anything you’ve regretted or anything that’s gotten you into trouble.  Or is it that you get to learn from your mistakes, and I’m just not supposed to make them?”  Sidestepping him, she left the room.

 

Adam looked at Abel.  “I think mama gets it, though she’s a little late.”

 

Nodding because his father was making sounds, Abel answered, “Ga,” followed by a squeal and an attempt at flying.

 

Letting Abel lay forward on his arms, Adam allowed him to fly into the middle of the bed.  Turning away to dress, he occasionally looked back to make sure his son was still safe, but halted while bent half way over to raise his trousers.  A slow smile stole over his lips as he watched Abel push himself upright, and then roll the rest of the way over on his back.  The baby fussed and rolled back over on his stomach, then attempted to push himself up to a sitting position again, and when he was able to remain sitting, he laughed and drew his hands together in what resembled a clap.  However, the motion sent him rolling to his back again, after which a whole string of angry grunts and jabbers emerged from the child.

 

Adam couldn’t help but laugh out loud which surprised Abel to the point that he stiffened and shuddered.  When his lips turned to a frown and his chin began to quiver, Adam’s mouth opened and his brows furrowed as he hurried to the child to scoop him up and shush him while giving him a soft kiss on the nose.  “Let’s go see what’s for breakfast, shall we?”

 

Still undecided as to whether he was going to cry, Abel tried to push away from his father with his chin tucked and an injured look on his face.

 

But Adam lifted the baby up, burying his face in Abel’s belly which started all manner of growls, giggles and gurgles as Adam made his way into the sitting room of the suite.

 

Mark and Keith were already seated at a small side table with their breakfast.  Etta was just entering the suite with a valise as Rachel clung to her mother’s skirt, and Shiloh emerged from Ming Lin’s room with a tray on which sat an empty bowl and small plate.

 

Looking into the bowl, Adam raised a questioning brow.

 

“The same young man who fetched the doctor brought congee and you tiao,” said Shiloh.

 

“What?”

 

“As far as I can tell, it’s rice porridge and something like a donut, but without the sugar.”  She turned toward the breakfast cart, but stopped and looked back. “And I was trying to protect Rachel.  She was so frightened.”

 

Reaching out to brush a loose lock of hair away from her face, Adam replied, “Sweetheart, most men who rob stagecoaches don’t really care.  We were lucky the guy on the horse was a gentleman.”

 

Her shoulders slumped.  “Eat.  I’d like to get to the end of this trip, please.”  Setting the tray on the bottom shelf of the cart, she moved toward the bedroom.  “I still have some things to pack.  Can you handle Abel while you eat?”

 

“I handled Joe.  I can handle Abel,”  he said loudly so she could hear him in the bedroom.

 

Chapter Thirty-Three

 

Before the Cartwright party could depart the Cary House, father and son had to be re-cleaned after what appeared to be an adventurous breakfast, both being covered in sticky maple syrup, Abel from the tip of his toes to the top of his head, and Adam’s shirt, upper chest, neck, face and hair.  This included the ears of both to which Shiloh had to pay attention to detail to remove the syrup from all the nooks and crannies.  She wore a smug smile as she tended her boys.

 

“I don’t ever remember Joe being that…grabby,” said Adam, sitting in the bathtub Shiloh had asked for just as the porter came to help with their luggage.

 

After she finished cleaning Abel’s ears, she plopped him down on Adam’s lap in the tub which made Adam jerk and grunt as Abel’s foot caught him in the groin.

 

“Careful!”

 

Shiloh stood over them with her sleeves rolled up and her arms crossed.  “You could handle him, huh?   It looks more like he handled you.”

 

Adam flared his nostrils as he brooded which only made Shiloh laugh heartily.  “Clean him up and hand him here.  I’ll get him dressed while you finish.”

 

By the time the three Cartwrights arrived at the coach, Ming Lin was already stretched across one of the inside seats, and Rachel and Etta were seated across from him.   There was just enough room for Shiloh and Abel.  Once Shiloh made sure she had everything she needed for Ming Lin’s care, Adam helped her into the coach.

 

Before he left, he called Rachel over to him.

 

Squeezing herself into her mother and hiding her face behind her mother’s arm, she merely said, “Uh uh.”

 

“I thought you might like to ride up top with me for awhile,” said Adam.  “If it’s all right with your mother.”

 

Etta smiled and nodded at Rachel, but the child still clung to her mother.

 

Adam could barely understand her when she said, “The bad men get me.”

 

“Sweetheart, the bad men are gone.  We’ll be crossing farms and riding through towns now, so there won’t be any more bad men.  You’ll get to see more up there.  But you’ll have to sit still and hold on.”

 

Moving out from behind her mother’s arm, she crinkled her nose.  “You hold on?”

 

“Once we get started, I won’t let go.  I promise.”

 

She moved slowly toward Adam, but still held her mother’s hand until Adam reached in to lift her from the coach.  Rachel objected when Etta pulled her hand away, but only for a moment.  Adam didn’t give her time to change her mind, quickly closing the door, winking at Etta, and helping Rachel climb up into the box next to Mark.

 

She just stood there staring at Mark until Adam came up beside her.  “It’s all right.  He’s a good guy,” said Adam as he sat Rachel in the middle of the seat, and assumed the seat next to her.

 

The child was almost lost between the two large men which was fine with her.  She felt walled in…and safe.

 

By the time they were in Diamond Spring, she was standing against Adam with Adam’s arm around her.  He had been pointing to all the views they were passing and explaining to her what she was seeing, most of which were piles of rock and dirt were placer mining was taking place.

 

They let the horses drink and rest for a few minutes before they continued on to El Dorado, another small mining town on the way to Sacramento they slowly rolled through. When they stopped at Shingle Spring, Adam climbed down from the coach with Mark, opening the coach door to help the ladies out.  “Time for a break, ladies.”

 

“Hey, man!”

 

Adam snapped his head toward the box to find Rachel standing there, her mouth pinched into a tight line, and her arms crossed.

 

“Oh, Mr. Cartwright, I’m so sorry,” said an embarrassed Etta.

 

Holding his hand up to stop Etta’s progress toward her daughter, he said, “I’ll take care of this.”

 

Etta looked toward Shiloh as if she were frightened of what he was going to do to her child, but Shiloh smiled and shook her head, whispering, “He’s a fair man.  He won’t harm her.”

 

With a stern look, Adam looked up at Rachel, and raised his eyebrows.  Rachel cast her eyes down.  “I know your mother taught you better, Rachel.  I expect better from you, too.”  As Adam reached up to her, Rachel bent down into his hands, and when Adam set her feet on the ground, she wasted no time running to her mother.  “Take her with you,” he said to Etta.  “Well deal with this before we leave.”

 

When everyone was back at the coach, Adam and Mark helped Ming Lin back in the coach, then Shiloh and Abel.  Next, he helped Etta into the coach and closed the door behind her.  Etta quickly sat down and leaned out the window.  Just as she was about to ask for Rachel, Adam said, “Rachel and I need to have a little talk, so she’ll ride back up top with me.”

 

Tears formed in Rachel’s eyes.  “I want Mama.”

 

Adam smiled.  “No.  You and I are going to ride up top and talk.”  Adam lifted her up in his arms, and she began to softly cry, holding out her hands toward Etta.

 

Etta started out of the coach, but Adam raised his eyebrow, stopping her before she put her foot on the step.  After watching the Cartwright’s silent discussions, she knew quite well he meant there would be no further discussion.

 

Having no choice but to climb up into the seat from Adam’s arms, Rachel sniffled and went on up, sitting in the middle of the empty seat.

 

When Adam was seated next to her, he didn’t immediately move his arm around her.  Mark wasn’t up in the box yet, so he had time to give her some space.  “Rachel, do you know what being disrespectful is?”

 

Pouting, she cut her eyes toward him without actually looking at him while shaking her head.

 

“Would you talk to your mother the way you spoke to me?” asked Adam.

 

Her eyes became wide and intense as she shook her head.

 

“Why not?”

 

“‘Cause it’s not p’lite,” she said softly with a finger in her mouth.

 

“And didn’t your mother teach you to be polite to all adults?”

 

She fidgeted as she nodded and quietly asked, “You gonna spank me?”

 

Turning his head away, Adam smiled.  “Not this time.”  Turning back to her, he continued, “But tell me why you spoke to me that way.”

 

Looking up at him and squinting, she asked, “Are you my new pa?”

 

Turning his body toward her, he took her hand.  “No, Sweetheart, I’m not your pa.”

 

“‘Cause I don’t got no pa.”

 

Adam took a deep breath.  “That doesn’t mean you won’t have a pa again someday.”

 

“Don’t know what you are.”

 

Furrowing his brow, Adam wondered if the only problem here was that she didn’t know how to address him.  “Why don’t you call me Uncle Adam?”

 

The look she gave him, her bottom lip stuck out and brows creased in thought, caused him to laugh.

 

“You my uncle?”

 

“Well, not really, but I’m about as much family as you have besides your mother.  And it’s easier than Mr. Cartwright, huh?”

 

She nodded.

 

Mark popped up on the other side of the seat so unexpectedly that Rachel jumped into Adam.

 

Again Adam creased his brow.  “Are you afraid of Mark?”

 

Looking down, she didn’t answer as her chin quivered.

 

Pulling Rachel against him, he hugged her tightly.  “You don’t have to be afraid of Mark or me, Rachel.  We both want to keep you safe.”  Though she still wouldn’t look at him, he turned and settled Rachel on the seat next to him.  “You ready to hold on?”

 

When she smiled and nodded, Mark smiled over at Adam and flicked the lines, coaxing the horses forward.

 

Their next stop would be at Clarksville to water the horses, and then on to Fifteen Mile House at Hangtown Crossing. From there, they would reach Sacramento by nightfall.

 

Getting into the hotel was easy.  However at daybreak the next day, after Adam sent Mark and Keith back to meet Tom and Johnny who were bringing Shiloh’s horses, a surprise she knew nothing about, the rest of the morning was made stressful by the collision of two steamers, the Washoe and the Yosemite, the day before.  Adam had reserved three cabins on the Washoe and had to scramble among a crowd of people trying to get a berth on one of two steamers waiting at the Sacramento City wharf, the Antelope and the Chrysopolis.

 

Shiloh and Etta watched from a bench under a building overhang  as Adam fought his way through a roiling crowd of loud, sometimes vulgar-mouthed men, all trying to get a ticket for the Chyrsopolis as the Antelope had just been pronounced full.

 

“Mrs. Cartwright, I don’t understand,” said Etta.  “Earlier you said it would be all right if we had to stay here another day.  If that’s so, why is Mr. Cartwright so intent on getting tickets today?”

 

Rachel had wandered too far away for their comfort, and both women each took one of her hands and pulled her back to the bench, sitting her between them.

 

“I supposed he’s afraid he won’t get tickets for tomorrow either.  I don’t think anyone has heard how badly damaged the Washoe or the Yosemite are.  And I think he was counting on getting to San Francisco a little early, though I don’t know why.”

 

Both women watched intently, pointing, grimacing and sighing as they watched Adam push, pummel, yell, and even growl his way through to the window.  After all, dressed in his black suit, black hat and gun, being physically in excellent shape and handsome to boot, he was the one most of the others in line thought of as their competition.

 

Shiloh merely shook her head.  “I’ll never understand men.  Don’t they know there are better ways?”  She stood, passing Abel to Etta.  “I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

 

Walking to the back of the throng of shoving men, Shiloh gently tapped a man on the shoulder.  “Excuse me,” she said in a sweet voice.

 

The man turned, certainly surprised to see a woman, and did the gentlemanly thing, tipping his hat and allowing her in front of him…as did the next man and the next, continuing on until she was at the window standing in front of Adam.

 

“I would like three cabins close together, please,” she said to the clerk in the window.

 

“I’m sorry, ma’am.  Only men can book cabins on the Chrysopolis.”

 

She gave him a severe look.  “What do you mean only men can book cabins?  Surely you have women aboard such a luxurious ship.”

 

“That’s why only men can book.  You see, there’s a gambling suite on the Chryssie, so we require all women be accompanied by a gentlemen…for their own safety.”

 

Adam could see the proverbial steam rising from the collar of Shiloh’s dress jacket when he stepped into her back and squeezed her shoulders.  “I’m her husband, and we’d like three cabins…for us and our…” he cleared his throat, “…help.”

 

“Three cabins, sir?  There are other people trying to get a berth on the Chryssie.”

 

“My wife and I and our child, another woman and her child, and another man.”

 

The clerk looked up at Adam, deciding whether to take him seriously when another clerk whispered in his ear.  He straightened, then filled in the forms, stamped them and said, “That’ll be a hundred dollars.”

 

Opening his mouth to object, he felt Shiloh grab the bottom of his jacket and jerk on it.  Grudgingly, he took out his wallet and laid paper bills under the bars of the window.  Taking the tickets, he guided Shiloh away from the crowd of men who politely stepped aside long enough for them to pass, then turned and started the pushing and yelling all over again.

 

Before they reached the bench where Etta, Rachel, and now Ming Lin sat, Adam stopped.  “Why did you do that?  I might have gotten a better price.”

 

“I doubt it.  The man who whispered to the clerk told him who we are.  Besides that, we may just hear some objections on board to Ming Lin having one of those cabins.  I think if you mention the price, it may discourage further protest.”

 

He smiled, and leaned close to her ear.  “I told you we’d make a good team.”

 

Giggling, she continued on to the bench.  In the meantime, Adam found a porter to help with their luggage, and soon they were all settled in their cabins readying themselves for their departure.  Etta and Shiloh made sure Ming Lin was comfortable, and assured him they would find something suitable for his meal as soon as the dining room was open.  They had lain the children down for a nap.  All was quiet for the time being.

 

Chapter Thirty-Four

 

Shiloh sat quietly holding Abel as the carriage drew away from the Chrysopolis docked at the wharf in San Francisco.

 

Rachel stayed at the window watching the hustle and bustle of the city pass by, every now and then turning to her mother excitedly and asking her to look at some curiosity.

 

“I have to go by the bank,” said Adam.  “It shouldn’t take long.””

 

Shiloh thought nothing of it, knowing that Adam had brought only the cash under the seat.  The Cartwrights had always kept more than that at the house, so it didn’t surprise her that he would get more.  But when they stopped in front of the bank, and Adam pulled a bag out from under the seat, she clutched his arm.

 

“What is that?” she asked sharply.

 

“I’ll tell you about it when I get back, Sweetheart, but right now, I need to get this into the bank.”  Adam opened the carriage door and looked both ways while he removed the leather loop holding his gun in its holster.  Without looking back, he stepped down out of the carriage and was up the steps of the bank before anyone even noticed him.

 

The bank manager was expecting him when he walked in the door.  “Ah, Mr. Cartwright.  Won’t you come this way, please,” the manager said, motioning toward the back of the tellers.

 

They went into a room, Adam waiting for the door to close before he relaxed and set the bag of silver ingots on a table in the middle of the room next to a set of scales.  “This is the silver from the Whitney mine I wired you about.  I’d like to convert it to cash, please.”

 

Without a word, a clerk took the bag and began weighing the bullion while the manager asked, “Can I get you something to drink, Mr. Cartwright?  Perhaps a cup of coffee or maybe something stronger.”

 

“No, thank you, Mr. Alistar.  I don’t expect this will take long, and my wife is waiting in the carriage outside.”

 

“Mrs. Cartwright?” said Etta as she watched Shiloh clench and relax her jaw, every now and then mumbling something, and then quietly huffing.  “Is something wrong?”

 

Closing her eyes, Shiloh took another quick breath, then looked at Etta and smiled.  “Everything is fine, Etta.”

 

Unconvinced, but unwilling to pursue it further, Etta sat back and watched Rachel as she looked out the window.  It seemed something had agitated Mrs. Cartwright.  She surmised it had something to do with the bag Mr. Cartwright had taken into the bank.

 

After Adam returned, everyone could feel the tension in the carriage as they made their way through town into the countryside.  Adam had moved his hand over Shiloh’s, but she pulled it away, giving him a squinted glare after which she refused to look at him until they left the confines of the city.

 

Now she looked at him. “Where are we going?”

 

Adam knew she was angry about the bullion.  He’d known she would be when he’d hatched his plan to get it to San Francisco without the stagecoach.  Now he wondered if his next surprise was going to make her happy or upset her further.

 

He let out a disappointed breath and returned only a slight smile when he answered, “We’re going home, at least what will be our home in San Francisco.”  Her reaction caused a chuckle, the one where she cocked her head and stared in front of her.  It was almost as if he could see cogwheels turning in her head.

 

Slightly bowing her head, she moved just her eyes to his. “What have you done?” she asked in a puzzled tone.

 

His smile stayed as he reached for Abel, moving the baby over into his lap.  “You’ll see in a few minutes,” he said, covering her hand resting on the seat with his.

 

This time, she didn’t move it away.

 

When the carriage turned down a dirt track off the main road, Shiloh leaned out the window to see what was in front of them.  The track was lined with trees that prevented her from seeing what was beyond except slivers of the vast ocean in the background.  But when they were half way down the road, what she saw took her breath away.

 

There at the end of the road surrounded by shrubs, flowers and smaller trees was a house, yellow in color with fancy white trim accented in purples and greens.   It reminded her of the rows of homes in the city, only this one sprawled outward rather than upward.  Off in the distance to the side of the house was a white barn in the same style as the house, but painted all white with a wood shingle roof.   Surrounding the barn were the same white corral fences that went up each side of the road.  At the other side of the house was another building.  She wasn’t sure she would call it a barn as it had several wide doors in addition to what appeared to be stall doors on one side, again reminiscent of the house and painted white.

 

She ducked back into the coach.  “I don’t understand.  Do we know who lives here?”

 

The coach came to a halt, and the coach door opened.  As Adam passed Abel back to his mother, he said, “I should say we do,” with a wide grin.  He took her hand as she stepped down out of the coach.

 

“Who?” she asked as they walked to the front door.

 

“Us.”

 

Stopping suddenly, her eyes moved up to the highest gable of the house.  “Adam…I…uh…what about our house on the Ponderosa?  Please tell me we haven’t moved.”

 

Moving his arm around her waist, he ushered her forward.  “Of course we haven’t moved…permanently.  But I thought since we’re going to have to spend more time here, you’d prefer to live in a place with room for your horses instead of a hotel room.  And I remembered how you enjoyed the view from Jim Fischer’s property when we stayed with him.”

 

“But I have no horses here,” she said, looking out at the empty pastures.  When Adam twisted his mouth, she continued with a pinched smile,  “Adam?  What else have you done?”

 

“Tom and Johnny will be here in another day or so…with some of your horses.”  He thought the idea of her horses being there with her would make her happy, but she folded her lips into a line before she sucked in her bottom lip.

 

“What’s wrong?”

 

Her eyes moved up to his. “How long are we staying here?”

 

“At least a month, maybe longer.  I don’t know yet.”

 

She turned her back to him.  “There are things…I can’t do here.  People I…  Couldn’t you have…warned me.  Or better yet, included me in this decision?”   She didn’t see his nostrils flare, nor the muscles of his jaw flex.

 

Closing his eyes, he calmed himself.  He knew she was going to be upset.  It was her nature when she was left out of something she felt was her right to know.  It was at these times he wondered if he would have been better off with a woman who dutifully followed her husband’s wishes.  Then he smiled.  He’d allowed her to rile him again, even when he’d anticipated her reaction.  But he had his ways of…calming her.  And life with anyone else would be…mundane.  “We’re here.  Why don’t we go in, get unpacked, and then sit down and talk about it, hm?”

 

She took such a long, deep breath, he thought she’d explode, but she tucked her chin and proceeded forward and into the house.  Trying not to be obvious, she moved her eyes around the room.  “You didn’t decorate this. It has a woman’s touch.”

 

Adam smiled and rubbed the back of his neck.  “So, you like it.”

 

“I didn’t say that.  Who decorated it?”

 

“Evelyn took care of it.”

 

“Oh,” she said as she poked her head around a corner into a parlor.

 

When her eyes lit up at the sight of a piano, Adam knew he was through the worst of it.  “Why don’t you get familiar with the house while I bring in the luggage,” Adam said as he gave her a quick kiss.  Hurrying happily out of the house, he thought to himself that things were turning out just fine.

 

By the time everything was out of the carriage and in the house, everyone had found their rooms and were ready to unpack when their bags arrived.

 

Ming Lin delayed arranging his room to explore the kitchen.  Adam had told Rachel she could have her own room, so she and Etta went exploring the upstairs.

 

Shiloh had retreated to the main bedroom to change and feed Abel and was pleasantly surprised to find the nursery at the back of the house with a magnificent view of a wide expanse of ocean.  A rocking chair was waiting for her near the window basking in the warmth of the sun. Though it wasn’t exactly like the nursery in the Ponderosa house, it was close enough to feel comfortable.

 

That night at dinner, everyone wore smiles and were quite happy with their accommodations.  Of all of them however, Rachel was the most excited.  “Me and Mommy seen aw the rooms, and I saw the big white building and the water.  I like that one.  But Mommy said you haf to say aw right, Uncle Adam.”  Picking up a green bean with her fingers, she put the end in her mouth and gnawed.  “I never had a room by myself afore.”

 

Etta took the bean from her and placed it back on the plate.  “We don’t eat with our fingers, Rachel.   Remember?”

 

“Why do you want to see the big white building?” asked Adam who had stopped eating to give the child his full attention.

 

“‘Cause that’s where horses live.  I like horses.  I gonna get me a big black horse when I a big girl.”

 

Shiloh looked at Adam with raised brows. “It’s never too soon to learn to ride, Rachel.”  Nodding to Etta, she added, “If it’s all right with your mother.”

 

“Do it haf to be aw right wif Uncle Adam, too?”

 

Shiloh raised her hand to her mouth to stop a laugh, all the while eyeing Adam.  Truthfully, she was amazed at how verbal Rachel had become after seeming to be a very calm, quiet child.  “Uncle Adam?”

 

The corner of Adam’s mouth went up.  “The room is yours, Rachel.  But Aunt Shiloh is in charge of the horses.”

 

Etta nudged Rachel to finish her dinner.  “I’m sure we can discuss it tomorrow.  Finish your dinner.  It’s coming up on bedtime.”

 

Later that evening while Adam was showing Shiloh a map of the property in the small room Adam had furnished as an office, Etta gently tapped on the open door.  “Please excuse the intrusion, but I thought now would be a good time to speak with you while Rachel is asleep.”

 

Taking Shiloh’s arm and moving toward Etta, Adam said, “Why don’t we talk in the parlor.  It’ll be more comfortable.”  Once in the parlor with the ladies seated, Adam went to the liquor cabinet and took out a decanter of brandy.  “Etta, would you like a drink?”

 

“No thank you, Mr. Cartwright.  I don’t drink,” she answered.

 

Holding the decanter up and looking at his wife, he asked, “Shiloh?”

 

“Yes, please.”

 

Adam poured brandy into two cordials, handing one to Shiloh, then sitting next to her on a settee.  “What’s on your mind, Etta?” he asked just before he took a sip.

 

“I need your advice,” Etta started, slightly fidgeting. “It’s not that I don’t appreciate that you’re trying to make Rachel feel like she belongs. In fact, I do, more than you know.  But she’s confused.  She really doesn’t know what an uncle or aunt is, but she thinks she’s a member of your family somehow, and I don’t want her to become…well…to feel entitled.”

 

“Etta, Rachel is just a child,” said Adam.  “She needs to feel like she belongs where she lives.”

 

Smiling Etta replied, “I understand that Mr. Cartwright, but I’m afraid…well, she asked just before I said good night if you were really her pa.  She just doesn’t understand.”

 

Sitting forward, Shiloh smiled.  “Etta, I think we just need to let her get used to this.  After all, she doesn’t remember living in a house where she was free to go where she wanted or having a room to herself.  She’s doesn’t remember trusting anyone but you.  This is all a big change for her, and it will take some time.”

 

Adam stood and walked to a window, then looked at his glass as he gently swirled the brandy.  “I don’t think you have to worry about entitlement.  If Rachel is going to be raised in our home, she’ll have the same opportunities and responsibilities our children will have, that is if you stay with us.  She should feel like she’s part of the family.”

 

Shiloh glanced at Adam, then added.  “As much as we hope you will one day.”

 

“I don’t understand Mrs. Cartwright.  I’m hired help.”

 

Adam bowed his head and smiled.  “Etta, you’ve met Hop Sing?”  She nodded.  “Hop Sing has been with our family since I was just a boy.  He was there when Joe was born.  He’s fed us, cleaned up after us, fussed at us, laughed with us and tended us when we were sick.  But he’s also worried for us…cried for us.  Hurt for us.  And we for him.  He’s not just hired help, even though we pay him wages.  We care about him as much as we care for each other.”  After setting his glass down on the liquor cabinet, he went to sit on the hearth next to the chair Etta occupied.  “You see, Etta, you and Rachel live in the house with us.  You see us at our best and our worst.  And even though Rachel is your daughter, she’s going to grow up with our children.  I think it would be cruel if Rachel was treated differently.  She’d grow up thinking that not belonging is her station in life.  We don’t want her…or you to feel that way.  As long as you’re with us, you’ll both be treated with the same respect, and in Rachel’s case, discipline as everyone else.”

 

Etta turned away and moved a hand across her face.  She had been told something similar before, but wasn’t inclined to believe it.  In her experience, people just weren’t that way.  “I never imagined there were people as…generous…or kind as you, Mr. Cartwright.  It’s hard to believe that a conversation on a stagecoach could lead to…well…a real home…where you can feel the love.”  Moving her hand over her mouth, she whispered, “Thank you.  But if you’ll excuse me, I…I think I need to go pinch myself.”  She made a little giggle amid her tears.  “Good night.”

 

Shiloh watched Etta leave the room before she wiped moisture from her own cheeks.  “Has anyone ever told you you have a way with words.”

 

Moving to the settee next to Shiloh, Adam took his bandana out of his pocket and gently dabbed her tears away.  “Did I say anything that you don’t feel?”

 

“No,” she answered with a quick smile.

 

“Why don’t we turn in?” he asked as he nuzzled the side of her face. “Tomorrow, we need to finish unpacking, and I need to get some papers in order and meet with Robert and Hiram.  I only have a day before I have to be in court.”

 

Adam stood and asked for her hand, which she gave willingly, and together each with an arm around the other, they climbed the stairs, quietly closing the door to their bedroom in their new home away from home.

 

Chapter Thirty-Five

 

Adam leaned back against the headboard of the bed, the covers pulled up to his waist.  He appeared to be reading a book, but after he’d read the same paragraph for the fourth time, he stopped trying.  A smile slowly consumed his face as he thought about Shiloh’s private side.  She certainly didn’t hide her thoughts in her day-to-day life, but here in private with him, she was even more open with her feelings in that she let him see her completely naked, certainly outside, but more importantly inside.  She didn’t hide anything from him here, and hadn’t since their last night in Santa Cruz on their honeymoon.

 

Shiloh had changed Abel’s diaper and fed him his last meal of the day before she excused herself to the washroom.  Now when she came out, she wore a light silk robe tied loosely at her waist.  She’d entered the room so quietly, he didn’t hear her, giving her the chance to consider this man with whom she shared her bed.  When they had first been married, she hadn’t considered his rugged good looks.  After all, she’d known him all her life, and he was…Adam…the same familiar Adam.  Then she learned how he could make her feel, and in the beginning that was enough.  Now he was there in the bed, his upper half bare, and his bottom half covered only by a blanket.  She felt her knees weaken as she considered him, his thick black curls always on the verge of escaping the efforts of his grooming, the smooth tanned skin of his face and neck, encroached only by dark stubble thwarted each day by his razor, his striking hazel eyes, eyes that could see right through her protected by eyelashes she envied, the exquisite curve of his lips from which eloquence flowed and instruments of ecstasy when used otherwise, muscled shoulders and equally strong arms that not only aroused her, but equally made her feel safe.  Then there was his broad chest covered with soft, black hair, and his long, graceful fingers, extensions of elegant hands that could hold her so forcefully, yet float over her skin so tenderly.  She’d never seen another man’s bare legs, but his were strong and well-proportioned, along with his back…side.

 

She looked away with a blushing smile.

 

He was a beautiful man in the truest sense of the word.  He certainly attracted roving female eyes.  She’d seen it more than once.  But they would never really know the beauty within.  He was unquestionably not perfect.  He had his temper.  He wasn’t completely infallible.  But he was a good man with a genuinely good heart, and he made her feel…cherished.

 

A tear escaped her eye as her hand rose and softly covered her mouth at the acknowledgement of what she’d come to know.  He owned her heart…her soul.

 

Still, there were times when she felt he considered her a lesser being. In the beginning he had promised they would be partners in every way.  Yet he hadn’t trusted her with his plans for the bullion.

 

Adam noticed her at the same time she looked away and continued to watch as her demeanor changed.  Laying his book on his lap, he looked closer.  “Are you crying?” he asked softly.

 

“Of course not,” she almost whispered, quickly gathering her wits about her. Laying his book on the bed table, he moved the blanket back.  “Come to bed.”

 

He followed her with his eyes as she approached the bed while letting her robe silently fall to the floor.  Even though she had given him a child, he appreciated her loveliness.  She was still a desirable young woman who had only blossomed more with motherhood.

 

As she lay down on the bed next to him, he moved the blanket over her, staying over her and moving his arms around her.  Reaching toward the lamp on the night table, he lowered the wick, changing the light in the room from a dim yellow glow to soft gray as the fog rolling in outside the window scattered the moonlight.

 

With a delicate tickle of his tongue on her lips, he coaxed her mouth open, then settled in for a succession of light kisses that eventually would send her hands slowly gliding over the skin of his arms and shoulders.  But this time there were no soft moans, no whispers of his name, no fingers sinking into his hair.  He moved to his side, laid his head on the pillow, and pulled her to her side facing him.  When he drew her close, she didn’t look into his eyes as she normally would when they were nose to nose in the bed.

 

“Is it the house?”

 

She responded by closing her eyes.

 

“The bullion?”

 

When her eyes popped open and looked into his, he knew the answer.  “Just say what’s on your mind,” he coaxed.

 

“You didn’t feel you could share your plans to move the bullion with me.  You don’t trust me.”  Her voice held hurt, certainly disappointment as her eyes moved away from his.

 

Moving his hand to the side of her neck with his thumb under her chin, he gently lifted her face so that her eyes where level with his.  “It had nothing to do with trust.  The robberies that had been reported before we left were all on stagecoaches.  It was safe to assume they were only after the bullion moving between Virginia City and San Francisco, so I wasn’t about to trust the stage line with our bullion.  I had intended to avoid the stagecoaches, but the late start from Strawberry put us right behind them.”

 

“I understand that.  What I don’t understand is why you didn’t tell me I was sitting on it.  With Abel.”

 

“Because what you don’t know usually can’t hurt you where robberies are concerned.”

 

She looked away.  In the past they had had conversations about protection, her argument being that she didn’t need it or want it while his was simply that it was what men…husbands do.  And sometime after that discussion she had lain on a bed in Dr. Martin’s surgery and begged her husband to keep Will Stewart away from her. After that, there had been the trouble with the wolves when she had cowered in his arms while he was protecting her…them.

 

“Sweetheart, besides the fact you were caring for Abel, you are not at your best in the confines of a coach.  I didn’t want to add to your…” he lightly shrugged, “…anxiety.” Raising his head to see her eyes, he added, “As it was, there was no harm.  They didn’t find it.”

 

“Even if they had, I don’t believe they’d have done us any harm. The man on the horse seemed to be a gentleman,” she said while curling his chest hair around her finger.

 

Nodding, Adam said, “In that respect, we were lucky.  Most men who rob stagecoaches would just as soon take whatever they find of value and leave no witnesses.”  He carefully took her hand and flattened it on his chest.  “It’s not completely unheard of for them to take infants.”

 

Furrowing her brow, she asked, “Whatever for?”

 

He moved his hand to stroke her hair.  “To sell.  There are people who can’t have children of their own.  A baby isn’t going to remember where he came from.”

 

Dismay took over her face, and she rolled away from him, but he settled in against her back, moving his arms around her and resting his head next to hers so that his mouth was at her ear.  “Protecting you and Abel was Keith’s responsibility.  That’s why he disappeared when we were stopped.  He had a rifle ready to shoot anyone who dared to touch you.”  He felt her exhale.  “What else?”  Met with silence, he asked, “The house?”

 

Entwining her fingers with his, she replied, “The house is fine.  And I appreciate you thinking of my comfort.  I just prefer to see what’s coming at me before it smacks me in the face.”

 

“Then I would never be able to surprise you,” he said with a grin, gently pushing her shoulder down so that she lay on her back again.  He picked up where he left off at her lips.  It took longer than usual as she was still mildly perturbed, but eventually all the familiar signs, her tender caresses, her lips lightly touching his skin, and her quiet moans and sudden quiet breaths when he touched her just so were present, telling him she wanted him as much as he wanted her.

 

Once their mutual desires were sated, a restful sleep overcame the two exhausted lovers, but both were awake before Abel made his morning proclamations.

 

Shiloh lay sleepily on her back, wearing a smile as she let Adam go wherever he wanted without any objection from her.  She giggled when his head popped up over hers.

 

“Good morning,” he whispered with a smile.  Before she could answer, his lips were on hers.

 

“Mm.”  Laughing again, she followed with another, “Mm.  Adam.  Adam.”

 

Diving into her neck, he responded, “Mm hm.”

 

“I want to have another baby.”

 

Adam stopped where he was, staying silent for a moment before he slowly raised his head to look into her eyes.  “Considering the trouble you had with Abel, isn’t it too soon? He isn’t even six months old yet.”

 

“He’s close enough, but that’s beside the point.  As soon as I’m able, I want to have another one.”

 

With a slight grimace, Adam rose up on his arms and moved to the side of the bed.  He continued to the wardrobe and opened it.  “I have to meet with Hiram today about the court case, and then I’m meeting Robert about the Jackson Square project and some houses he has contracts for.”

 

Shiloh slowly sat up against the headboard suddenly feeling exposed, though mostly internally.  Adam’s reaction troubled her.  Grabbing the blanket, she covered herself.

 

Adam already had his trousers on, though unbuttoned, and reached into the wardrobe for a shirt.

 

“Why don’t you want to talk about this?” she asked quietly.

 

Letting his head fall back as he took a deep breath and released it, he turned to face her with a red shirt in hand.  “There’s really no point in discussing it until it’s a possibility, is there?” he asked with raised brows as he shrugged on his shirt and began to button it.

 

“Adam, you’ve always talked about our children, as in more than one.  Have you changed your mind?”

 

Seeing the look of desperation on her face, he smiled lovingly.  “Of course not.”

 

“Then why can’t we talk about it?”  When he didn’t immediately answer, she thought back to something he’d said before about waiting to discuss it until there was a possibility.  And they’d been making love for months now with no worry on his part. “How did you know it’s probably not going to happen now? I didn’t even know until Annie told me.”  She gave him a sidelong look as he sat on the side of the bed to pull on his socks and boots. “Did Paul tell you?”

 

He tensed at the question.  He wouldn’t lie to her.  “No,” he answered quietly without looking back at her.

 

“Annie?”

 

From her tone of her voice, he could imagine the spark in her eyes, but still he couldn’t lie to her.  This time, he only nodded.

 

“Did you ask her or did she just happen to mention it?”

 

The spark in her eyes ignited, and he knew he had to do something to put it out.  “Does it matter?  I know.  Isn’t that enough?”

 

He knew in an instant it wasn’t enough when she bowed her head and clenched her teeth.  In almost the same moment, she threw off the blanket and bolted out of the bed, heading toward the washroom.

 

“Shiloh,” he called as he followed her.

 

She tried to close and lock the door, but he pushed through.  “What exactly are you angry about?”

 

With her back to him she answered, “Why did you ask her?  And why didn’t she tell me you asked?” Turning to face him, she continued, “Why wasn’t I involved in a conversation about me?”

 

His brow curved in concern.  “She probably didn’t think she needed to tell you since she’d already had the same conversation with you.”

 

She calmed down a bit.  “What about you?  You intended to go behind my back, didn’t you.  Did she know you weren’t going to tell me you’d spoken to her?”

 

Pinching the bridge of his nose, he remained silent.  He understood why she thought they had both betrayed her.  Worse yet, she had no idea why he’d asked the question in the first place.  He reached for her, but she backed away, wrapping her arms around herself.

 

Bowing her head and covering her mouth with her hand, she was afraid to ask her original question.  But she did.  “Why did you ask her?”

 

“Sweetheart, you could’ve died.  I won’t lose you like that.  And it would be unfair to Abel…unfair to another child if he survived and you didn’t.”  By this time, he was in front of her with his hands on her arms.

 

“But you said you wanted children,” she whispered.

 

“I do. All I’m saying is that we need to think about what might happen before we decide.”

 

It was as if her breath, her mental faculties had been knocked out off her.  “Before we decide?   Don’t you want me to have your children?” she choked out as she tried to push away from him.

 

He grimaced at his poor choice of words and answered calmly, his voice soothing.  “Of course I want you to have my children.  But at the same time, I don’t want to lose you. When the time comes, we’ll talk to Paul…”

 

“Paul is not my doctor!  Have you forgotten what he wanted to do?”

 

“And Annie,” he added quickly.  There’s nothing wrong with two opinions about whether there’s any danger of the same thing happening.” Pulling her into his arms, he moved her head against his chest and cradled it in one hand.  “We have time, Sweetheart,” he said quietly.  “There’s no point in getting upset about this now.  You’ll torment yourself for the next six months.”

 

She sniffled.  “I don’t know how you think I’ll be able to forget about it.”

 

“Oh, I think there’s someone who’ll keep your mind off of it,” he said, and right on cue, Abel announced he had awakened and required attention.

 

She started toward the door, but Adam held her.  When she looked up at him, he gazed warmly into her eyes before he kissed her lightly, lingering at her lips for a moment before he released her.

 

Walking through the bedroom to the nursery, her only thought was how she could possibly forget when it was Abel who inspired her to want another baby.  She’d missed so much of all the changes when she was carrying him.  She hadn’t appreciated him as much as she should have…or could have if she hadn’t been so helpless those first few months.

 

Chapter Thirty-Six

 

Tom and Johnny had arrived with Shiloh’s horses.  Even so, she paid little attention to them other than walking around the paddocks while one of her men was exercising them.  She always had Abel in her arms, seemingly holding him closer to her if that was possible.  The bright smiles everyone had become accustomed to rarely appeared.  A foreboding occupied her, and Etta was becoming more and more certain it would overcome her.

 

Adam had thought he would do no more than sit next to Hiram during the contract dispute for which he’d agreed to represent the Ponderosa.  It was a good thing he was aware of the agreement in question because Hiram unexpectedly called him to the stand to testify.

 

“Would you state your name?” asked Hiram.

 

“Adam Cartwright.”

 

“And are you related to Benjamin Cartwright?”

 

“Yes, I’m his son.”

 

“And, Mr. Cartwright, do you assist your father in the running of the ranch called the Ponderosa?”

 

Nodding, Adam answered, “Yes.”

 

“In what capacity?”

 

“Well, I take care of things when my father can’t.”

 

“What kind of things, Mr. Cartwright?”

 

Taking a deep breath, Adam furrowed his brow as if the answer was obvious.  “When he’s away, I run the ranch.  I do the ledgers and payroll. I also bid most of the timber contracts, a good many of our beef contracts, and I usually represent the ranch in legal matters here in San Francisco. Until recently, I’ve been the trail boss on many of our cattle drives, and I’ve run the timber camps.  I rode herd and fence.  And I still determine what’s needed for most of the repairs around the place.”

 

“You’re familiar with the contract in question?”

 

“Yes.  I priced that contract and negotiated the terms myself.”

 

“So you signed the contract.  Not Ben Cartwright.”

 

“Yes, that’s right.”

 

“Your Honor, I’d like to draw the court’s attention to Defense Exhibit 1 which we’ve already seen.  As you can see, the contract was signed by one Adam Cartwright which we have established is the identity of the witness.”

 

After papers were shuffled, the judge nodded for Hiram to continue.

 

Hiram turned and looked at the opposing counsel’s table with a finger in the small pocket of his vest watching the plaintiff fidget uncomfortably.  “And what were the terms of that contract?”

 

“It called for the delivery of debarked timber on specific dates after which payment was due within one week of delivery.”

 

“Were there any stipulations for requests for late deliveries, say for instance, if they were behind, and they had no room to store the timber?”

 

“Yes, there were.”

 

“And were there the same type of stipulations to request earlier deliveries if they were ahead of schedule.”

 

“Yes, with sufficient written notice.”

 

“Did you ever receive such a notice, Mr. Cartwright?”

 

“No, I did not.”

 

“Could you have delivered timber if that notice had come toward the end of the contract?”

 

Shifting and crossing one leg over the other, Adam smiled.  “If it had come before September, yes.  We had finished cutting the timber for this contract early, so it was sitting there waiting for delivery in the first week of August.”

 

“So there would have been no reason for you to…conveniently miss…a request for early delivery?”

 

“Absolutely not.  In fact, we would have preferred to deliver early since we had to have several men up at the camp to make sure no one made off with the finished timber.”

 

Hiram then presented into evidence the timber camp log book, the work rosters which redistributed the men to other areas of the ranch, and the payroll records indicating two men were still being paid for that specific camp.  He also presented a wire and an affidavit obtained from the clerk at the Virginia City telegraph office sent from Ben Cartwright to the plaintiff that informed him the timber was ready when he needed it.  The date of the telegram was one week before the plaintiff claims he sent the notice, a notice of which he had no record.

 

When Adam and Hiram walked out of the courthouse, Hiram said, “Adam, he was counting on Ben being unable to attend.  Word of the trouble on the Ponderosa has made it out here among those who regularly do business with your family.  I knew he was trying to take advantage of the situation.  I’m glad you were able to come in your father’s stead and bring the log book and rosters with you.”

 

“Trouble?” said Adam, half smiling.  “If you call having too much to do trouble, so be it.  But it’s a good position to be in, especially if you can manage to do it all.  Which we are.”

 

“Good to hear,” said Hiram, smiling and patting Adam’s shoulder.  “I’ll send word to your father that this suit is put to bed.”

 

“Ah, if you don’t mind, I’d like to tell him.  I need to catch him up on some other things anyway,” said Adam.

 

“All right then.  Would you tell him I’ll send him a bill for my usual fees?”

 

Laughing, Adam said, “Of course.”

 

The two men parted company, but before Adam would head home, he had been requested to discuss one of the houses with the man who would be living there with his family.  Of all the designs he created, he felt most rewarded by homes that would be filled with families who would change and grow and perhaps pass something he built down through their generations, the same way he felt about his home and his family…and the Ponderosa.

 

On the way home, Adam thought about his last appointment. The man had been genial and had an idea of what he wanted for his family and with the suggestions Adam made, he began to appreciate what Adam could do for him.

 

When riding outside the confines of a carriage, say, on a horse, one could see for miles across the gently rolling landscape north and south of the Cartwright home.   From the moment Adam turned onto the track to his home, he was searching the pastures, slowly working his way to the smaller corrals and finally to the paddocks surrounding the big barn.  Their own riding horses were kept at the carriage house where one side was occupied by a row of stalls.  Shiloh’s other horses were stabled at the big barn.  But he only saw Tom and Johnny working the horses.  Shiloh was nowhere to be seen.

 

He opened the front door and called, “Shiloh!  I’m home!”

 

Walking past the parlor and stairs into his office at the back of the house, he dropped his saddlebags on his desk, then went in search of his wife.

 

Etta had come out of the kitchen when he called, and greeted him.  “Mr. Cartwright, may I get you something to drink?”

 

“No thank you, Etta,” replied Adam, smiling.  “Do you know where I can find Mrs. Cartwright?”

 

Bowing her head, Etta clasped her hands in front of her.  “She’s spent most of the day in the bedroom.  And she had no lunch.”

 

Adam puckered his lips.  “I see.  Excuse me,” he said, turning and trotting up the stairs.  When he got to the bedroom door, it was cracked enough for him to see inside.  Shiloh was sitting on the side of the bed playing with Abel who was…sitting up.  And he wasn’t falling over.  He smiled at the sweet scene before he pushed the door open and walked briskly to the bed, taking Shiloh’s hand and bringing her up to her feet.

 

“What’s this?” she asked.

 

Next, he gently lifted Abel into his arms, then grabbed Shiloh’s hand and headed back out the door without a word.

 

“Adam?  What…”

 

“Etta!” he called once down the stairs.

 

The urgency in his voice brought her running from the kitchen.  “Yes, Mr. Cartwright.  Is everything all right?”

 

He smiled and quickly passed Abel to her.  “Would you watch Abel until supper?”

 

“Of course.”

 

Shiloh’s eyes were wide and her mouth open.  “I…what….”

 

Still holding her hand, Adam pulled her through the entryway and out the front door, down the front steps, and then headed for the carriage house, all the while pulling Shiloh behind him.

 

When she looked back at the house, she stumbled, but he caught her and pulled her to his side without missing a step.  “You and I are going for a ride,” he said.

 

She tried to turn her body toward the house, but he held her up on her tiptoes against him, even as she turned. “Adam, Abel.  How can you just leave him like that without even saying goodbye?”

 

“Sweetheart, he won’t know the difference.  He’s comfortable with Etta.  You hired her to take care of him.”

 

“But…”  she was almost in tears.  “Dinner isn’t for several hours.  That’s too long to be away.  What if he gets hungry?”

 

“He’ll be fine.”  Reaching forward, he opened the door to the carriage house, and with Shiloh still pressed to his side, he entered and closed the door.  In the dim light, he moved her in front of him and enveloped her.  “Now, what’s bothering you?”

 

Her eyes were moist, her lips turned in a frown, and her brows curved in what looked to Adam like mild panic.  “I’ve never left him without telling him I love him.  He’ll think we don’t care.”

 

With a furrowed brow, Adam moved his head back so he could really see her.  “Shiloh, he’s too young to know the difference,” he said calmly.  “And you need to get used to leaving him in Etta’s care.  That’s why she’s here.  And she’s more than capable.”  He kissed her nose.  “Hm?”

 

Her eyes moved away, but her expression didn’t change.

 

“Sweetheart, we’ve been invited to a party at the Ralstons, and I need you to be that woman who charms people with her bright smile…the one who sets everyone at ease, the one who glides across a room.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because Slater and Cartwright will be doing part of the design for his new home, so we’ll be spending a lot of time working with him.  And he and his wife were quite taken with your last performance here.”

 

The panic subsided, but her frown never left.

 

“Come on,” he said, taking her elbow and guiding her further into the carriage house.  “Let’s go for that ride.”

 

After hitching a horse and retrieving a lap blanket from a storage room, Adam made sure Shiloh was comfortable before he drove the buggy down the track away from the house.  He couldn’t help but notice that she turned to watch the house get further and further away.

 

When she turned back, he took her hand, moving it over his arm.  “Etta said you’ve been in the bedroom all day.”

 

Looking away, she shrugged.

 

He didn’t push her.  He was taking her to a place where she could scream, yell, cry…whatever she needed to do to get it out, no matter what it was, though he knew, at least, part of it.

 

The half hour ride was mostly silent other than the squeak of the buggy and the occasional snort of the horse.  Adam turned down a road that followed a gentle slope, the buggy going slowly downward until Adam pulled the reins back, stopping the horse where a sandy trail led out to an open beach and the ocean.

 

He jumped out and walked around the buggy.  “Would you walk with me?”

 

Looking into his eyes, she wanted to tell him to take her home, but his eyes were that dark color, not quite black, that they became when he was completely sure of himself and wasn’t going to take no for an answer.  She knew he was just being polite giving her the choice before he removed her from the buggy, so she gave him her hand, though she did so apathetically.

 

After helping Shiloh down, Adam took the blanket from the buggy, tucked it under one arm and guided Shiloh down the trail.  He stopped on a rise of dry sand, the front of which was gently washed by the salt water.  Laying the blanket on the sand, he sat down and tugged on her hand until she sat down in front of him where he could move her between his legs and wrap his arms around her with his cheek against hers.

 

For a time, they said nothing…just listened to the waves lap at the shore.

 

Adam waited until she relaxed, leaning her back into his chest.  “Talk to me.”

 

“I haven’t been away from him since he was born…at least not out of sight.  I’m worried.”

 

“Then why did you hire Etta?”

 

“So she could watch him while I worked with the horses or practiced piano.”

 

“But not so you could perform or take someone interested in a horse riding,” he suggested.  He felt her tense up again.  “Shiloh, that’s an excuse.  You know Etta is perfectly capable of taking care of Abel.  Now out with it.”

 

“Why did you bring me here?”  she asked softly, changing the subject.

 

The corner of his mouth turned up. “To remind you of Santa Cruz.  Where you finally opened up to me.  Where you said something about taking our children to the beach there.  Well, we can take them here.  This is part of our property.”  When she didn’t respond verbally, but rather sighed heavily, he bit the inside of his cheek and slightly nodded. “This is about our conversation this morning, isn’t it?   About having another baby?”

 

She leaned up and away from him.  “I suppose I’m mourning those children I will never have.”

 

Closing his eyes, he let out a slow breath.  “I did not say you couldn’t have another child.”

 

“You said after we talk to Paul and Annie, we would decide.  Paul and Annie have already said I probably won’t have the same problem, that it’s not unusual for a first child to be large.  But they’re not going to get rid of that one word…probably.   And so their opinion will never be enough for you because probably won’t is the same thing as possibly will.”  She stood and turned to face him.  “Did it ever occur to you that even now probably won’t is the same as possibly will?”

 

His lower jaw crooked as he thought about that.  Annie had said Shiloh probably wouldn’t conceive as long as she was nursing Abel.  Not wouldn’t.  Probably wouldn’t.  In his fervor to have his wife, he’d conveniently forgotten that little detail.  Quickly grabbing her hand, he pulled her back down into him and swiftly laid her on her back, moving over her.  When she pushed on his shoulders, he held her hands above her head.

 

Fear colored her face.  “Please don’t do that.”

 

“Shiloh, I am not Will Stewart, and I have no intention of forcing myself on you.  I just want you to stop that whirring mind of yours long enough to listen to reason.”  When her breathing slowed, he continued.  “We don’t have to dwell on this now.  We have time.”

 

“What time, Adam?  I might have already conceived for all we know.”

 

“I don’t think so, Sweetheart,” he answered, smiling.

 

Tears began to well in her eyes, spilling over and trickling down the side of her face.  “I don’t understand.  You talk about children, yet you don’t want me to have them.  Where do you think these children of ours are going to come from?”

 

Loosening his grip on her hands, he entwined his fingers with hers.  “We could adopt.”  He didn’t understand why that simple statement upset her more…to the point that she had to sit up or she’d choke on her tears.

 

“You don’t understand,” she sobbed.  Turning into him, she clenched his shirt collar in her hands.  “I’ll do anything you want. I’ll be anything you need me to be.  Please don’t take this away from me.  It’s as if I’m not a…a whole woman.”

 

Her reasoning took him by surprise.  “What?  Shiloh, if I recall correctly, you were reticent about having children.”

 

“Yes, well, that was before I had one.  And it’s…wonderful.”

 

He had no idea how her face could seem so tortured and her voice sound so…fulfilled…at the same time.  Be there it was in front of him.  He also had no idea that having Abel had transformed her so.  The one thing he was sure of…he would have to tread lightly for a while until they could see a doctor.

 

Chapter Thirty-Seven

 

Each day, Adam left early for the Slater and Cartwright office in the city.  The office was in a first floor suite in the prestigious A. E. Kelley and Company building which was an advantage for Slater and Cartwright.  Alfred E. Kelley had become a construction magnate on the backs of those who came to San Francisco to find their fortunes during the gold rush without actually breaking their backs and spirits on the hard rock of the mines.  These were the men who built San Francisco.  Cartwright of Slater and Cartwright had designed the new courthouse and had received the nod to design portions of William Ralston’s estate house.  Kelley was ready and willing to construct whatever plans the architects developed.

 

Today, there would be no work on plans for any of the numerous buildings Adam had been tasked with drafting.  Today, he would do the final inspection of the courthouse with a small gathering of reporters and city officials waiting on the street at the front door for the results.

 

Willis Timmons accompanied Adam through the building for the final inspection, making sure Adam could see every bolt, every beam, every joint, every coupling, and every miter he desired.  When Adam stepped out of the front door, he smiled at Mayor Coon, signed the inspection form, and then shook the Mayor’s hand, standing and shaking for several minutes while the city’s photographer managed his wet plate negative.   The photograph would be hung in the courthouse lobby with a placard identifying Slater and Cartwright as the architectural firm who designed the building.  Adam walked away with a bank draft for the final payment along with the agreed upon bonus.   And Willis Timmons walked away from city work and joined Slater and Cartwright as their project foreman who would look out for the company interests on all of their San Francisco projects.

 

Afterward, Adam met Robert Slater in their offices and toasted to the building that took the company from somewhere in the middle to the top of the list of architectural engineering firms.

 

“Adam, we should have a real celebration,” said Robert.  “How about you and Shiloh come back into the city tonight.  We’ll have the best steak dinner in the city.”

 

Adam laughed as he drank the last of his champagne.  “Seriously? Have you forgotten most of the beef eaten in this city comes from the Ponderosa?”

 

Robert feigned annoyance.  “That’s probably true.  However, the preparation of a good piece of beef, the accompanying dishes and the ambiance could very well make the difference.”

 

Adam harrumphed.  “I have a better idea.  Why don’t you and Evelyn come out to the house?  You’ll be guaranteed the best cut of Ponderosa beef money can buy.”

 

“All right,” said Robert, smiling.  “We’ll bring the champagne and the wine.”

 

Raising his glass even though it was empty, Adam said his goodbyes.  When he arrived at home, he looked toward the big barn as he always did.  Today, he was rewarded with a view of Shiloh working with Cotton, the white mare Adam had given her as a Christmas present, while Etta stayed a discreet distance away bouncing Abel in her arms.  Rachel skipped around her mother in ever widening circles picking wildflowers and adding them to her already overflowing fist of flowers.

 

Stopping Sport, Adam watched for a moment, thinking how perfect the scene was.

 

Diverting from the track to the carriage house, he rode in the opposite direction toward the big barn.

 

“Mr. Cartwright,” greeted Johnny.  “We don’t usually see you out here,” he said, taking hold of Sport’s bridle while Adam dismounted.

 

“Johnny, how is everything with the horses?”

 

“Better now that Mrs. Cartwright has starting working them again.  I mean, the best Tom and I can do is exercise ’em.  He won’t try to train one without Mrs. Cartwright here to make sure he doesn’t make a mistake.  She told him once that one simple mistake could ruin a horse.  Scared the wits out of him.”

 

Narrowing his eyes, Adam said under his breath, “Somehow I don’t think that’s what scared him.”

 

“Excuse me, Mr. Cartwright?”

 

“Never mind.  Would you walk Sport over to the carriage house and bed him down?  Make sure he gets double oats.  He’s had a long ride.”

 

“Yessir,” said Johnny.

 

Adam watched Shiloh for a few minutes waiting for her to approach Cotton with a handful of carrot pieces before he strolled over.  Standing several feet behind her, he cleared his throat.

 

She turned and smiled as Cotton took the last of the carrots from her hand.  “Adam, she’s so cooperative.  She’s going to be ready for some weight on her back very soon.”

He creased his brow.  “How long have you been working with her?”

 

“All day today.  I think Mr. Brent must have spent time with her even if he didn’t try to break her.  Cotton’s very gentle,” Shiloh said gently scratching the horse’s nose.

 

Walking up behind her, Adam moved his arms around Shiloh.  “It’s good to see you happy.”

 

Turning in his arms and running her hands up his chest and over his shoulders, she replied, “I know I have my moments, but I’m not really unhappy.  You make me very happy.  It’s just that I so want us to have our own children.  Just think how they’ll turn out with a mother and father like us.”   She gave him a hard pat when he grimaced.  “I’m not talking about our mutual stubbornness.  I’m talking about intelligence and creativity.”

 

He arched an eyebrow.  “Well, you know you can’t just forget about the stubbornness.”

 

She giggled.  “You once said you enjoyed sparring with me.  Have you tired of me?”

 

“No,” he said as he bent down to kiss her.  Barely moving away, he said, “Never,” and kissed her again.  “But I have to admit, it’s hard when you let yourself get so upset over something you can’t do anything about in the present.”

 

Her smiled disappeared as she bowed her head.

 

Cupping her chin in his hand and lifting her face to his, he said softly, “I understand how important having another child is to you.  It’s important to me, too, but so are you.  And I’m the one who has to live with our decision if it’s the wrong one.”

 

Her brows furrowed as her lips parted.  Once again, she thought to herself, she was being selfish.  She knew he’d be happy with a brood of his own.  But she tried to imagine how she’d feel if she lost Adam, and the sudden rush of unimaginable emotional pain brought tears to her eyes.

 

“Hey, what’s this?” he asked, bending at the knees so he could see her face clearly.

 

She quickly wiped her eyes and smiled.  “I used to loath letting you see any kind of emotion out of me.  But these days, I can’t seem to stop.  I thought we could go for a ride before supper,” she said, changing the subject, her bright smile back in place.  “Tom and Johnny brought some of my foundation stock and some that are ready to be sold, but they all need some good exercise.  You can even ride Eli.”  They turned toward the house, walking each with an arm around the other.  “Oh, and Tom Maguire came by.  He asked if I could perform a night here and there.  Seems his patrons have been asking when he expected me back.”

 

Adam scratched his nose.  “First, I would prefer knowing how you feel.  Before we were married, not knowing got me in a lot of trouble.  And second…” he stopped to face her, moving his hands to her arms where he gently squeezed, then slid down to take her hands in his.  “I…ah…made plans for this evening.  I did the last inspection on the courthouse and signed off, so Robert thought we should celebrate.  He wanted us to go back to the city for dinner, but I…” he smiled nervously, releasing a short breath as he did, “well, I talked him into bringing Evelyn out here for dinner.  Seems he wanted a good steak.”

 

She arched an eyebrow which caused him to twist his mouth.  Poking a finger in his chest, she said, “You just better be glad it’s Ming Lin in our kitchen instead of Hop Sing.”

 

When he realized she was teasing him, he laughed and wrapped his arms around her, giving her a long, deep kiss that made her toes curl.

 

“Uncle Adam, Uncle Adam!”

 

Both Shiloh and Adam looked to see Rachel running toward them.  Just as they separated, Rachel jumped up, and Adam swept her up into his arms.  “What have we here?”

 

“I pick ‘em for you,” she said in her quiet, sweet voice.

 

“Well, thank you.  Why don’t we go in and find a vase for them?”  Winking at Shiloh, he started toward the house with the ladies falling in behind him, Shiloh taking Abel in her arms and lifting him up in the air which started a string of laughs and high-pitched squeals.

 

Adam listened contentedly.  He stopped and waited for Etta and Shiloh to catch up to him, then shifted Rachel to one arm as he moved his other over Shiloh’s shoulders, and together, they walked to the house.

 

That evening, when Robert and Evelyn arrived, Etta answered the door and led the Slaters into the parlor.  Adam shook Robert’s hand and kissed Evelyn’s cheek, and in turn, Robert kissed Shiloh’s cheek, but when the two ladies came together for a hug, Shiloh said, “I thought I’d be meeting little Robbie.”

 

“Well, he’s weaned now, so we don’t have to keep him out late.  He’s with Mrs. Beauchamp, our nanny,” said Evelyn, smiling.

 

Shiloh cast a quick glance at Adam who only smiled.  “Of course, but how did you get beyond leaving him for so long?”

 

Maintaining her smile, Evelyn looked puzzled.  “Well, he’s put to bed fairly early, so he doesn’t really miss us.  And it’s good to get out every now and then and not have to worry.  Of course, with business picking up the way it’s been, we tend to go out in the evenings more often now.”

 

Shiloh smiled, but her mind was spinning through all Evelyn had just said, almost to the point she thought she might have to sit down from dizziness.  Then she felt a touch at her elbow.

 

“Sweetheart,” Adam whispered as he bent his head to her ear.  “Are you all right?”

 

“Hm?  Yes, of course.  Have you offered the Slaters something to drink?”

 

“We were just about to open the champagne for a toast,” he answered, heading toward the liquor cabinet and turning over four flutes.  Robert was at his side pouring the champagne, and when all glasses were poured, each man took two glasses and offered one to his wife.

 

“A toast,” said Robert.  “To the most imaginative, innovative architectural engineer San Francisco has ever seen.”

 

“I can’t drink to that,” said Adam, laughing.

 

“Well, you’re going to have to get used to it,” said Robert.  “That’s a quote from the Alta California.”

 

“Well, in that case,” Adam responded, holding his glass up.

 

After the toast, Shiloh asked, “Robert, do you happen to know who wrote the article?”

 

Finishing his sip of champagne, Robert replied, “A fellow by the name of Mark Twain. Seems he came from out your way.  Have you heard of him?”

 

Adam and Shiloh smiled at each other.  “You could say that,” said Adam.

 

The two couples retreated to the dining room when Ming Lin announced dinner was served.  They sat down to Ponderosa beef with all the trimmings, and at the end of dinner before dessert was served, Robert announced it was the best steak dinner he’d ever consumed and wondered if Ming Lin would want to open his own restaurant.

 

“Of course, we know that wouldn’t be possible, considering he’s Chinese.  The attitude is really too bad.  It’s the city’s loss,” Robert commented.

 

In the kitchen, Ming Lin shook his head wondering why his employer’s guest would think he’d want to.  He enjoyed his employment with the Cartwrights who respected him.  Why would he want to work for the others, the white devils?

 

After dessert, Evelyn accompanied Shiloh when she went upstairs to feed Abel.  “Curious, Shiloh,” said Evelyn.  “You seemed taken aback by our conversation downstairs…about leaving Robbie with the nanny.”

 

Shiloh blushed and pinched her lips into a line.  “Evelyn, wasn’t there ever a time when you didn’t want to leave him?”  Looking down at Abel and stroking his head, she added, “They’re so small and helpless.”

 

Evelyn reached out and touched Shiloh’s knee.  “He is now, Shiloh.  That will change.  He’ll start moving about, having fits and throwing things when he’s unhappy.  I think it’s good for both mother and child to part ways for a little while.”  She looked away.  “It keeps a woman sane.”  Turning back, she said, “And it gives him a break as well.  After all, the person he’s mad at most is his mother simply because his father isn’t around all that much…with work, you know.”

 

Shiloh’s eyebrows curled in worry.

 

“Has there been a problem?” asked Evelyn anxiously.

 

“No, no, nothing like that,” Shiloh replied, smiling.  “I’m just having trouble leaving him, even though Etta is perfectly capable of taking care of him. I’ve just never really been away from him.  And it’s difficult when he’s still nursing.  But Evelyn, don’t you want another?”

 

“If it happens, it would be nice. But we waited so long for Robbie, I’m not sure there will be another.  Robert will be forty this year, and I’m not that far behind him.”

 

After a strong burp, Shiloh left Abel in Etta’s care, and the women returned to the parlor with the men.  They had been talking about several of their projects and the possibility of hiring an apprentice.  It seemed Slater and Cartwright was about to expand.

 

“Unfortunately, Adam, we have to get back,” said Robert.  “It will be quite late by the time we arrive home.  And we both have an early day tomorrow.  Shiloh, I don’t know if he’s told you, but he’ll be meeting another architect and Billy Ralston at his new estate to help him decide what he wants to do with the house that’s there.  And then, there’s the party at Ralston’s tomorrow night.”

 

Moving her hand to her chest, Shiloh looked at Adam.  “I didn’t know that was tomorrow night.”  She swallowed hard at the thought of leaving Abel.

 

Chapter Thirty-Eight

 

Adam rushed through the front door, his arms full of rolled-up drawings.  When he knocked over a vase on the entry table, Ming Lin rushed out of the kitchen.

 

“Do not worry, Mr. Cartwright.  I will clear it away.”

 

“Ming Lin, I’m late. Would you mind laying these drawings on my desk?”

 

“I do not mind,” said Ming Lin as he took several drawings, but in the process most of them fell to the floor.  Adam looked exasperated, so Ming Lin said, “You go. I take care.”  Realizing he had lapsed into the broken English of his less educated cousins, he timidly smiled at Adam, then quickly knelt over the drawings that had rolled here and there.

 

Adam turned toward the stairs, but stopped at the first step and turned back.  “Is Mrs. Cartwright upstairs?”

 

“Yes, Mr. Cartwright.  With Miss Etta.”

 

Running up the stairs, then down the hall to the bedroom, he pushed the door open and stumbled to a stop.  “I thought you’d be ready by now. We’re late,” he snapped.

 

“I’m not late.  You are, so don’t bite my head off, please.  All I have to do is slip my dress on,” which she did, and left the room to find Etta to help with the buttons.  When everything was in place, the two women went downstairs and waited for Adam to come down.  In the meantime, Shiloh cuddled Abel while Etta waited to take him.

 

As Adam trotted down the stairs, Shiloh surrendered little Abel to Etta, but was still fussing over him, kissing his face as the baby laughed.  Rolling his eyes, Adam lowered his shoulder and lifted Shiloh over it without missing a step.

 

“What are you…” she began to protest, but upon reaching the door, she looked up at Abel, and with a smile, she said, “I love you, my sweet boy,” and blew him a kiss just as Adam hurried down the front steps.

 

Adam had asked the caretaker to hitch the buggy and bring it to the front of the house when he had arrived home, so all he had to do was deposit Shiloh on the seat, pull the lap blanket over her, and climb in himself.  He stopped, however, long enough to plant a wet kiss on Shiloh’s mouth.  In another minute, he had the horse trotting down the track toward the main road.  The caretaker had also seen fit to light the two lanterns on either side of the coach, so even though it was dusk, Adam was comfortable with hurrying the horses along.

 

He glanced sideways at Shiloh, then leaned into her shoulder.  “I’m sorry I barked at you.”

 

She folded her lips and nodded.

 

“You’re angry with me.”

 

“No.  Despite my less than ladylike departure and the absence on your part of any acknowledgement of your son, I’m not angry.”

 

Raising his brow, he quickly looked over at her.  There was still just enough light for her to see his smirk. “If I had left the leaving up to you, we’d still be there.”

 

She gave him a slight smile and folded her hands in her lap.  He hadn’t given her time to get her wrap. When she began to rub her hands together, Adam noticed.

 

“Take the reins for a minute,” he said, and once she took them over, he removed his suit jacket, draping it over her shoulders, and then took the reins back.

 

Turning away, she raised the collar to her nose and took a deep breath, closing her eyes and letting his scent wash over her, almost instantly relaxing her.  She moved her hand to his thigh and smiled up at him, eliciting a smile in return.

 

For the remainder of the ride, Shiloh thought back to her conversation with Evelyn.  Evelyn’s world didn’t revolve around her son.  Perhaps in the beginning it did, and perhaps other demands on her time changed it.  Whatever the reason, she was satisfied with what she had.  Maybe because she felt she might be too old to have another.  Maybe it was time for Shiloh to be thankful for what she had, instead of looking for more.  She had a beautiful, healthy boy.  Knowing some of Adam’s past with women and that there were still plenty who would have fallen over themselves to corral him into marriage, she was fortunate he had chosen her.  He had been patient with her since Abel’s birth.  Perhaps another child was one of those things to be left in God’s hands.

 

A warm squeeze of her hand took her attention away from her thoughts.  “We’re here,” said Adam quietly.  He pulled the buggy to the columns at the end of a walkway where a porter stood waiting to move it after they disembarked.

 

Realizing these guests weren’t quite ready to go into the house, he moved a polite distance away.

 

Stepping down out of the seat, Adam stood and waited for Shiloh to straighten the skirt of her dress, then took his jacket from her and put it on.  Before he helped her down, he moved his hands to her waist.  “You’ll be the prettiest woman here,” he said, smiling.  “Are you ready?”

 

“Why wouldn’t I be ready?” she asked with furrowed brows.

 

Stepping closer, he answered, “You’ve had a lot on your mind lately.”

 

Touching his face with her open hand, she looked into his eyes and smiled.  “I told you…I’ll be anything you need me to be.  Isabella?”

 

“Shiloh and Isabella are one and the same.  Hold on.”

 

She moved her hands to his arms as he lifted her at the waist and gently set her feet on the sidewalk leading to the house.  Before he let her go, he kissed her, and though it wasn’t a deep kissed, he lingered, enjoying the sweet softness of her lips.  “Maybe we should go back home,” he whispered with an impish smile.

 

While straightening his tie, she replied, “We will.  But first, we have to impress your Mr. Ralston and his guests.”

 

They were led through the large foyer to the entrance of an expansive room where the furniture was arranged in small groups against the walls.

 

The butler stepped forward.  “Mr. and Mrs. Adam Cartwright,” he announced.

 

All heads turned followed closely by discreet whispers. News of the final completion of the courthouse had spread like wildfire through the city.

 

In the middle of the loosely packed room a man grinned, took two wine glasses from a passing tray, and strode quickly forward.  “Adam, I’m so glad you could come,” he said proffering the wine to each of the Cartwrights at the same time he caught a woman’s attention across the room.

 

“William Ralston, my wife, Shiloh.”

 

Ralston’s eyes widened as his mouth opened in surprise, but eased into a smile.  By this time the woman he had summoned was at his side.  “My wife, Elizabeth,” he said as he moved her hand over his arm.  “Please pardon my surprise, Mrs. Cartwright.  I was expecting Isabella.”

 

“I don’t believe I’ve ever met anyone named Shiloh,” said Mrs. Ralston. “Such an unusual name.”

 

Shiloh half smiled. “It’s Hebrew, though I wasn’t raised in the Jewish faith.”

 

“And Isabella? I suppose it might be difficult to garner so much popularity on stage as Shiloh Whitney.”

 

Glancing up at Adam wearing a somewhat irked smile, Shiloh quickly turned back to Mrs. Ralston, and having changed her smile to a charming grin, she asked, “Isabella is my middle name. You wouldn’t happen to know a headmistress by the name of Mrs. Henderson, would you?”

 

Mrs. Ralston’s head moved back. “Pardon me?”

 

“No, I suppose not,” Shiloh said politely.

 

Ralston patted his wife’s hand.  “Do you honestly believe anyone would care about her name once they witnessed a performance?”

 

Moving her hand over his, Mrs. Ralston leaned into her husband and smiled. “Of course not.”

 

“Now, you two, we have food and drink and music.  Please come in and enjoy yourselves,” said Ralston, moving to Shiloh’s side, taking her hand, placing it over his arm and guiding her further into the room at the same time his wife went to Adam’s side and followed.

 

The Cartwrights were introduced around the room, after which Ralston took Adam to introduce him to the other architect, John Gaynor, who would be working on Ralston’s new mansion. After a few minutes of small talk, Mrs. Ralston excused herself to greet new arrivals to the party, leaving Shiloh to herself.

 

Adam, Ralston and Gaynor retreated to Ralston’s study, a room lined with book shelves, and where there were no shelves, the walls were covered in rich cherrywood raised panels.  On a round table in the middle of the room were sketches of two elaborately designed buildings and another sketch of the existing estate home.  The first two sketches were of the Opera Garnier in Paris and the Palace of Versailles, also in France.  The estate was formerly Canada del Diablo which Ralston had recently purchased from Count Leonetto Cipriani.  The estate was situated about twenty-five miles south of the city.

 

After considering the two architect’s proposals made earlier in the day for the existing building, Ralston had made his final decision to keep the original two story Italian villa, but expand it, building up and around.  He was very specific about the features he wanted in his country estate, indicating particular sketches.  He also wanted an enclosed veranda all the way around the house because it reminded him of the decks surrounding the riverboats he once captained.

 

“Now, gentlemen, I trust you will not dwell on this tonight.  I’ll have everything you see here made available at your offices for another day.”  Moving toward the door of the study, Ralston continued. “I hope you both enjoy the party tonight.”

 

Shiloh had been included in the early conversations among the women in attendance, but the chatter soon faded as she didn’t have much in common with other wives. Certainly they were eager to speak with Isabella Whitney, but when they had stayed long enough to tell their friends that Isabella was part of their circle of acquaintances, they drifted on to the next group.

 

Still, Shiloh didn’t remain solitary for long.  It was the men who found her fascinating, not just for her talents as Isabella, but more for her knowledge of horses.  “I take a horse from wild and wary to gentle and trusting first.  Once he trusts me, he’ll allow me to train him, and I do that without breaking his spirit,” she explained.

 

“How does your husband feel about your horses?”

 

Shiloh turned to face a rather tall, handsome man.  She gave him a bright smile as she was in her element now, definitely more comfortable talking to the men than the women. “How do you mean?”

 

Taking a glass of champagne off a tray, he passed it to Shiloh, slightly bowing his head.  “It’s well known the Cartwrights supply horses to the Cavalry.  Surely your husband’s family doesn’t take that kind of time to make those horses useable.”

 

“Of course not.  My husband and his brothers break those horses.  They break their own cow ponies as well.”

 

“And how do you feel about that?”

 

“She doesn’t feel anything particular about horse breaking one way or another,” interjected Adam as he moved into Shiloh’s side and wrapped her arm around his.

 

Patting his arm, she replied, “Well, that’s not entirely true.  I know it’s necessary considering the number of horses the ranch and the Cavalry need.  However, I don’t enjoy watching.  Breaking a horse can be hard on man and beast alike.  But those are horses not suited to my brand of training.”

 

Adam extended a hand.  “Adam Cartwright.”

 

“Ah yes.  The rancher turned engineer.”  Sharon grasped Adam’s hand in a firm shake.  “William Sharon.  Billy and I are about to open a branch of the Bank of California near Virginia City.”  He turned his attention back to Shiloh.

 

“So your horses aren’t suitable for, say, herding cattle?”

 

“I would never expect my horses to be used that way, though a few would make excellent cutting horses.  Take my own horse, a gray Arabian.  She’d handle cutting cattle with ease, but I would never ask her to do that.  The reason the ranch needs so many cutting horses is because they don’t last very long.  Cutting cattle is hard on the legs.”

 

Turning to Adam, Sharon asked, “And you have no issues with her working with these horses?”

 

Adam gave him a stiff smile.  “She’s very good at what she does.  Why would I mind?”

 

Ralston, accompanied by his wife, interrupted.  “Excuse me, if you would.  The musicians are about to start playing.  Would you and Mrs. Cartwright care to join us for the first dance?”

 

Adam nodded to Sharon, who seemed so interested in Shiloh and her horses.  He offered his arm to Mrs. Ralston as Mr. Ralston had already bowed and took Shiloh’s hand, and both couples walked to the dance floor.

 

“And so we meet again,” said Mrs. Ralston, “though under much more pleasant circumstances.  I wanted to thank you again for directing us to the warmth of the loft in that…place.  What was the name of that town?”

 

“Grizzly Flat,” said Adam.

 

“Sleeping in the barn wasn’t quite as uncomfortable as it could’ve been.  I’m just sorry we didn’t get to thank you properly before you left.”

 

“It was my pleasure,” answered Adam simply.  He remembered how she had tried to steer their conversation to the Whitney Mine that evening.

 

“Mrs. Cartwright, I must say, you intrigue me,” said Mr. Ralston.

 

Giving him an amiable smile, she asked, “How so?”

 

“It sounds as if you’re as comfortable in a corral as on the stage.  Elizabeth and I saw your last performance in the city.  May I say we were both enchanted.”

 

“Thank you,” Shiloh answered graciously.

 

“My wife and I had the good fortune to meet your husband last winter.  It seems he was on his way to inspect the new courthouse when we shared space in the same barn.”

 

Shiloh’s smiled disappeared as she looked at him questioningly.  Adam hadn’t mentioned that he had met the Ralston’s before this trip.

 

“It was in the midst of a hellish snow storm.  Adam directed us to the hay loft.  I found it curious that he hadn’t taken his own advice, but rather chose to sleep in a stall with his horse.”

 

“We think of our horses as faithful companions.  And that particular horse saved Adam’s life during that storm.  He quickly became quite fond of Buster.”

 

“Quite a man, your husband.  He dispatched a trio of ruffians in the barn, slept in a stall as if he had done that every day of his life, was almost killed in an avalanche, then comes to San Francisco anyway to inspect a building.”  When Shiloh’s smile disappeared, he continued.  “It’s quite obvious he’s more intelligent than most, and in the occupation he follows in the city, he’s more talented than most.  The other half of his life is ranching…hard, sometimes back-breaking work.  He’s a wealthy man in his own right.  Yet he’s unpretentious.”  Ralston surveyed those around him.  “That’s uncommon here in this city.  With his choices in life, why do you suppose he’s that way?”

 

Cocking her head, she gave him a proud look.  “One word, Mr. Ralston.  Loyalty.  He’s loyal to his family.  He’s loyal to his word.”

 

“Tell me, Mr. Cartwright,” began Mrs. Ralston.  “We’ve heard your mine was closed down before any bullion could be pulled out.  Perhaps my husband’s bank could help…financially, you know.”

 

There it is, Adam thought to himself.  “Someone blew up the powder house and started a fire that might have destroyed a good amount of prime timber on the Ponderosa.  We closed as a precaution.  After the fire, I didn’t want anyone else getting hurt until we could find out who did it.”
She laughed nervously.  “Most mines can’t just close, Mr. Cartwright.  They have their stockholders to think about…and their notes.”

 

Taking a deep breath, Adam answered.  “Our financial well-being doesn’t depend on the mine.  And we have no shareholders, other than myself and my partner, my wife’s brother.  As far as bullion, I brought bullion with me and deposited it in the bank my family has always done business with.”  The music ended as Adam did.  He led Mrs. Ralston back to her husband, passing her hand to Ralston at the same time he took Shiloh’s hand, excusing them back to the dance floor as another song began.

 

After Adam let out a slow breath through pursed lips, Shiloh looked up at him with a smile, then raised both brows.  “Care to tell me what just happened?”

 

“It seems Ralston is more than interested in our mine.  He owns pieces of most of the large mines around Virginia City, mostly by calling in defaulted loans.”

 

“You did tell her we don’t need a loan, didn’t you?”

 

Rolling his eyes, he said, “Yes, I did.  I just don’t think that’ll be the end of it.  Ralston has a good head for business, and his stock holders and directors think of him as their golden boy.  But the way he’s gone about advancing his wealth in the mines…the word cutthroat comes to mind.”  Glancing over her head at the two Ralstons dancing close and talking quietly, he added, “I just hope it doesn’t affect the building contract.”

 

Chapter Thirty-Nine

 

Adam sat on the side of the bed watching Shiloh through the nursery doorway as she fed Abel.  The small drawer of his night table was open, and in his hand was a small package, brown paper tied with twine.  Turning the package over and over in his hand, he continued to consider his wife.  She was still so young and innocent in the ways of physical love, knowing only what he had shown her.  He’d lied when he told her he’d taught her everything he knew.  There were just some things decent women didn’t need to know…or do.

 

Since she had pointed out that another child was a possibility, he’d been almost consumed by a battle between that which he desired, that of which his body continually reminded him, and that which he must do to protect her…from him, from what his actions might bring. Taking a deep breath, he chewed on his bottom lip.  This evening she had worn an elegant gown with her curls swept up on her head held in place by pearl-tipped hair pins.  She had glided into the room, floated across the dance floor, charmed the men and tolerated…yes, that was an accurate word…tolerated the women.  She had been the prim and proper Isabella, even when she was discussing her horses.

 

Admittedly, it was her Isabella persona that initially attracted him.  It was her confidence, her enthusiasm, and finally her voice, her grace, the way she gave of herself on a stage that caused that first flutter of his heart. After that, he saw her other side in a different light. Her intellect, her tenacity, her willfulness, her confidence and eventually her insecurity were all things he wanted to tame, to protect.  She really didn’t need him like most women needed a husband.  Where normally the need to be taken care of would eventually become some kind of love, the opposite was true of Shiloh.  She had proven she could take care of herself.  She had wanted, had needed to be loved from the beginning.  Since, she had proven time and time again she wanted him to be the man who loved her.

 

He looked at the object in his hand.  Even if she didn’t know what it was, once he told her or showed her, she would feel demeaned.  And he wouldn’t blame her.  He never thought he’d use a condom with a respectable woman, and once he was married, he never considered that he’d ever use one again.  He’d just have to control his physical needs until he found another way to protect her…from him.  Closing his eyes, he exhaled when he realized whatever he did or didn’t do, he was fighting a losing battle before the battle even began.  While he could refrain from initiating intimacy, she often made the first move herself.  He’d never rejected her advances, but rather eagerly welcomed them.  If he spurned her now, she would feel unwanted.

 

There was just no good way to avoid the possibility without hurting her considering how strongly she felt about having another child.

 

He tossed the package back into the drawer and closed it. When he looked up again, Shiloh was standing with her arms crossed, leaning against the door frame of the nursery door, watching him.

 

She smiled.  “What was that that had you so lost in thought?”

 

Holding out his hand, he said, “Come ‘ere. I wanna talk to you.”

 

When she went to him and took his hand, he held it as she sat next to him.  Moving his hand to his mouth, he tapped his upper lip with his index finger.  “Ah…”

 

She touched his lips with a finger.  “Do we have to talk tonight?” she asked, leaning into him and placing small kisses on his lips, his chin and moving to his neck as she pushed his shirt collar out of her way.  She slipped over to his lap, moving back to his neck where the skin beyond his stubble was warm and smooth with a slightly salty taste.  She loved the goose bumps that rose at the slightest touch of her lips or at her fingers floating lightly over his skin.

 

Before he thought about what he was doing, he had moved her legs around him, sliding his hands up her back and pressing her into him, taking her mouth in a kiss that was tame at first, but grew hungry…torrid…until he lay back on the bed, taking her down on top of him.

 

Pushing herself up, she tore his shirt apart, sending buttons in all directions, then fumbled in her fervor to unfasten his trousers as his hands untied the sash of her robe.  For awhile, they simply enjoyed the feel of warm flesh under their hands and lips.

 

But both suddenly stopped, each looking into the eyes of the other.  When they each quietly said the name of the other at the same moment, both slightly smiled at first, then lost their smiles and bowed their heads.  Moving to opposite sides of the bed, they departed each other’s company.

 

Adam pulled on his robe and retreated to his office where he poured himself a glass of brandy, then stared out a window, looking out to the ocean.

 

Shiloh slipped into her flannel night gown followed by her robe and wandered the rooms downstairs, ending up in the kitchen.  It was late and everyone else in the house had been in their beds for some time.  She lit the fire in the kitchen, prepared a hot cup of chocolate and gazed out the window of the kitchen at virtually the same view of the ocean.

 

He had heard her come down the stairs, moving his head in the direction of the sound to listen.  All was silent for a few minutes until he heard a pot being placed on the stove.  They had two more weeks before they would be going home.  He was sure their nights would be miserable until she could see a doctor.  And that in itself would be a struggle.  He wanted her to see Paul.  He had known Paul since he, his father and brother had come to the Ponderosa…over twenty years.  He trusted Paul.  But she would want Annie to examine her, and though part of him could understand why…he imagined it was hard for a woman to submit the most private part of herself to a man who was not her husband…Annie had little practical experience, and had insisted that Shiloh see Paul when she knew she hadn’t the knowledge to diagnose or treat Shiloh after Abel was born.

 

Shiloh twirled her cup of chocolate on the kitchen table as she looked out upon the ocean, unseeing.  Her mind was on the possibility and what it would do to Adam and eventually to them if she had gone on.  Sure, Adam stopped.  So did she, but it wouldn’t have taken much on her part to get him going again.  She took a deep breath.  She couldn’t do that to him.  She couldn’t try to conceive unless he wanted it, too.  And at the moment, he didn’t.  Looking down at her very plain, very uninviting gown, she snorted.  He was going to be seeing a great deal of this gown.

 

***

 

Shiloh traveled to the city with Adam several days each week in order to rehearse for two performances while Adam went to his office.  Most days, he worked on various designs, spending the most time on Ralston’s estate home.  He finalized the plans for the apartment homes he and Robert would design on Jackson Square.  And he met with the rest of those men who would be building homes in the city.  He would be taking an enormous amount of work home.

 

When Shiloh went into the city to perform, Etta, Rachel and Abel were with her.  Etta never imagined she’d ever be so close to someone famous.  Shiloh had never presented herself as renowned. When she was at home, she mostly worked with her horses.  She certainly didn’t act at home as if she was a celebrated singer.  Even so, seeing her employer perform on stage was exhilarating.

 

As for the horses, Shiloh had sold three before she sent Johnny and Tom back home with the rest two days early.  Then she began to pack and close the house.

 

“Adam, do you have someone to take care of the house when we’re not here?” she said loudly from the parlor so Adam could hear her in the office.

 

He stuck his head out the door.  “Riley is the caretaker, Sweetheart.  He stays in the room next to Ming Lin’s.”

 

“Really?”  She came out of the parlor with a box of odds and ends she would be taking home…sales contracts for horses, performance contracts for the two nights she sang in the city, and sewing.  She was still trying to make that first dress for Abel, even though he’d already outgrown it.  When she reached Adam, she passed him the box.  “How come I never saw him in the house?”

 

“Because he has a private entrance to that room.  He came highly recommended by the previous owner, who’s a friend,” he said, taking the box and setting it on a table.

 

“Oh,” she said as he took her into his arms.  “What friend?”

 

“This belonged to Jim Fischer.  He leased it before I bought it.  And he gave me a good price.  Said it was worth a discount to have good neighbors.  Shiloh,” he whispered as he bent his head to kiss her.  It was a tentative kiss.  She had been avoiding any closeness lately, but when she kissed him back, he took her face in his hands and gave her a kiss that left her breathless as she dropped her forehead on his chin.  “It’ll be over soon…the waiting…I promise.”

 

“How can you promise?” she asked softly.  “What if a doctor says I can’t…or I shouldn’t?  Where does that leave us?”

 

He raised her face and touched her forehead with his so that their eyes met.  “There are some…things…we can do.”

 

“If you’re talking about that…thing…in your drawer…”

 

“You went through my drawer?”

 

“I didn’t go through it.  I opened it to put your pocket watch away.  You forgot it this morning.”

 

“And what…exactly…did you find?”

 

She lowered her eyes.

 

“So you opened it?”

 

This time she closed her eyes.

 

“Do you even know what it is?”

 

“Once I unfolded it, it was pretty obvious.”  Her eyes popped back up to his.  “I am not a strumpet,” she snapped.

 

“No, you’re not.  There are other things we can do.”

 

She pulled back away from him. “You know, I don’t really want to hear them…right now,” she said, smiling only briefly.  “We could be getting ahead of ourselves.”

 

“Shiloh,” he said, trying to pull her back, but she wriggled from his hands.

 

“I’m almost finished packing,” she said unsteadily. “I just have to finish Abel’s things.  We’ll be ready to leave in the morning.”  She backed out the door without looking him in the eye.

 

Listening to her footsteps as she trotted up the stairs, he thought this could very well be the unhappiest he’d been since they’d been married.

 

The next morning, Riley drove the carriage to the San Francisco wharf where the Cartwrights and their traveling companions boarded a steamer to Sacramento.  From Sacramento, they took the train to Folsom, and from Folsom a stagecoach to Virginia City. The stagecoach would run through the night, stopping at various way stations along the way to serve the passengers a meal or change horses.  Because Adam was traveling with his wife and baby and with another woman and child, he was the only man allowed to ride inside the coach among the women.  The other men rode on top, holding on for dear life as the stage bumped and leaned along the rough road.  Ming Lin chose to ride on top of the luggage in the boot.  The tied-down canvas offered some protection from being tossed onto the road.

 

Ben, Annie, Hoss and Joe were there to meet the stagecoach when it arrived in Virginia City.

Adam stepped out of the coach first and turned to help those women anxious to leave.  Shiloh waited.

 

Before Shiloh and Etta disembarked, Ben was at his son’s side.  “Welcome back,” he said with a wide grin.  “Based on what I’ve read in Shiloh’s letters and the newspapers, you both have quite a story to tell.”

 

“Hey Older Brother, it’s about time you came home to do some real work,” said Hoss as he shook Adam’s hand until Adam’s teeth rattled.

 

Annie tiptoed to give him a kiss on the cheek.  “Can your wife come out of the coach now?”

 

She stepped by him to the coach door and left him with his hands out wide and his brow furrowed.  “Well, hello to you, too.”

 

Shiloh was the first to the door, passing Abel to Annie who lifted the child into the air. As Adam helped his wife from the coach, Abel began to cry until Annie brought him into her arms and cooed.  Still, he whimpered and reached for his father, and once safe in da’s arms, he laid his head down on Adam’s shoulder and hid his face at his father’s neck.

 

“He’s only been away a month.  He hasn’t forgotten us so soon, has he?” asked Ben.

 

“Oh, I think he’s just tired,” said Shiloh, tiptoeing to accept a kiss from her father-in-law.  “He didn’t sleep much on the stage.  It was pretty bouncy.”

 

No one had noticed that Joe had helped Etta down, and then turned to lift Rachel out of the coach.  He squatted down so he was at eye level with her.  “Miss Rachel, how was the ride home?”

 

“Don’t like it,” she said, shaking her head with a finger in her mouth.

 

Joe raised his brows.  “Why not?”

 

“Couldn moove,” she answered, drawing her shoulders together.

 

Joe laughed as he tousled her hair and stood, tipping his hat with a twinkle in his eye to Etta who smiled timidly back.

 

The rest of the family had gathered on the boardwalk and stood watching, all wearing quizzical looks.

 

While Etta blushed and turned to retrieve the valise with Abel’s diapers, Joe gave his family a short nervous laugh.  “I’ll…ah…just start loading the buckboard,” he said, pointing toward the luggage that was being unloaded from the boot.

 

Shiloh and Adam maintained their similar looks as they turned to look at each other. Both had sucked in the sides of their mouth and raised their brows.  Adam arched one eyebrow, and in response, Shiloh pushed her bottom lip up and slightly shrugged.  Leaning in close, he said, “We should see Paul while we’re here.  The quicker we get it done, the better to deal with it…finally.”

 

She looked nervously around her.  “No.  I don’t want to make a habit of going to the doctor every time we get back from a trip to San Francisco.”

 

“Shiloh,” he said with his nostrils flared and in a rather exasperated voice while giving her a sidelong look.

 

Glancing down at her reticule as she fumbled with the string, she replied, “I want to speak with Annie first.  If I have to see Paul, I want her with me.”  She looked almost desperately into his eyes.  “Please.”

 

He took a step closer so that he was almost up against her. “You can speak with her now.”

 

Backing away, she said without looking at him, “Yes, but I want her to examine me as well.  She can’t do that here.”

 

“Why are you putting this off?” he asked, looking over her head with a grimace.

 

She closed her eyes and slumped.  “Adam, we just got home.  Can’t we get settled before I have to go through this?  You don’t have to do anything.  I’m the one who’ll be poked and prodded, possibly by a man who is not my husband, in places where only my husband should have access.”

 

Adam closed his eyes and blew out heavily through his nose.  “You’re right.  But there’s no reason you can’t discuss this with Annie on the way home.  I’ll take care of Abel.”

 

After the luggage was loaded in the buckboard, Adam arranged for Annie and Shiloh to ride in the back of the buggy while he and his father rode in the front.  Etta and Rachel rode on the seat of the buckboard with Hoss, but only after Hoss threatened to make Joe walk if he didn’t get in the back with the luggage.

 

Chapter Forty

 

As Ben pulled the buggy out of town, Annie leaned close to Shiloh while she watched Adam bounce Abel on his lap.  “Adam told me you wanted to talk to me, and that it couldn’t wait.”

 

Shiloh smirked.  “I don’t know why he’s in such a hurry.”  Creasing her brow, she added, “Never mind.  I do.”  She turned to face Annie.  “I need you to examine me and tell me if I can have another baby.”

 

“Is that all?” asked Annie with wide eyes.  “I thought I told both of you nothing would happen until Abel was weaned.”

 

“You said probably.  That means there’s a possibility.”

 

“True.  You could conceive while you’re nursing.  But it’s not likely.”  Before Shiloh looked away, Annie caught her troubled look and took her hand.  “What’s happened?”

 

Holding Annie’s hand tightly, Shiloh answered, “Everything’s stopped.”

 

“Stopped?”

 

“Yes, everything.”

 

“You mean you don’t…”

 

“No, we don’t, and it’s all because of that word, probably.  Adam’s afraid the same thing will happen…or that maybe something else will happen because of the problems with my hips.”

 

“Shiloh, Paul told him it wasn’t unusual for a first baby to be large, and that it wasn’t likely to happen with the next.  As far as your hips, you seem to be doing fine.  Are you still in pain?”

 

“If I ride a lot, I’m a little sore by the end of the day.  But I’m not having any trouble moving.”

 

“Well, I can examine you to see if there’s anything that might cause a problem.  But I would prefer Dr. Martin be involved.  He has much more experience with these kinds of problems.  I had no practical experience with this kind of thing at school.”

 

Shiloh looked pleadingly into Annie’s eyes.  “Can you do it with Dr. Martin in the room?  I’m not comfortable with him…down there.”

 

Annie laughed.  “He’s a doctor, Shiloh.  He’s seen more down there than anyone else I know.”  She snorted.  “He’s seen yours already.”

 

Shiloh’s mouth flew open. “What!  When?”

 

Annie laughed so loud, Adam turned and looked, but she quickly shook her head and shooed him back around.  “You passed out right after Abel arrived.  While you were lying on Adam’s lap, Cheron cleaned you up and Dr. Martin observed.”

 

Shiloh scowled, then shook and wagged her head.  “Why was he even there?”

 

“Because your husband asked for him.”

 

When Shiloh glared at the back of Adam’s head, Annie admonished her.  “Don’t you dare be angry with him.  He was scared to death he was going to lose you.”

 

Bowing her head into her hand, Shiloh rubbed her temples.  “That’s the whole problem, isn’t it?   Adam’s fear that he’s going to lose me.”

 

“I would imagine besides the fact he loves you…” Annie said, lightly pinching Shiloh’s arm, “…and you should be elated by that fact, he also remembers what it’s like growing up without a mother.”

 

Shiloh opened her mouth to speak, but instead closed her eyes and exhaled.  Annie was right.  As much as Adam kept his emotions to himself, she knew he worried about her as much as he worried he’d have to raise their son alone.  She curled her fingers around Annie’s hand resting on her lap. “We’re supposed to go to the main house for dinner tonight. I’ll talk to Adam before we come over and discuss what I’d like to do.  You can look tonight, and then we can all ride into town together tomorrow.”

 

Squeezing Shiloh’s hand, Annie simply smiled and nodded.

 

***

 

Ming Lin had been given the night off, but decided he’d rather help Hop Sing in the kitchen of the main house.  He enjoyed the appreciation the Cartwrights showed their cooks as much as he enjoyed their laughter.  It was good to see a family that stayed together much like the Chinese families of old.  Ming Lin considered himself lucky to be the cousin of Hop Sing, otherwise he would not have gotten the chance to work for what the Chinese community considered a most honorable white family.

 

Tonight, the Cartwrights would dine on fried chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy, bacon fried cabbage and corn bread. Ming Lin prepared a small plate of rice he had cooked and then mashed with a rolling pin to which he added butter and sugar.  Along with the rice, he added a little homemade applesauce for Master Abel.  This was the first time Abel had been fed at the table during dinner, and everyone in attendance watched as Shiloh gave Abel the first bite.

 

Abel was too interested in everyone watching him, and turned his head this way and that as the subject of his attention giggled or wrinkled their nose at him.  This, in turn, brought forth a grunt or a wrinkled nose in return which caused laughter all around the table.

 

Shiloh narrowed her eyes and looked around the table.  “Have none of you ever seen a baby eat?”

 

Joe and Hoss looked at each other and shook their heads.

 

Cocking his head, Adam asked, “Hoss, you don’t remember watching Joe learn to eat real food?”

 

Reaching for the bowl of mashed potatoes, Hoss replied, “Nope.  And I can’t imagine even wantin’ to.”

 

Shiloh had just put some rice into Abel’s mouth when he realized no one was paying attention to him any longer.  At that moment he decided to blow through his lips, spraying his mashed rice all over his mother.

 

Her mouth flew open as her eyes closed at the same time everyone erupted into laughter again, encouraging Abel to blow even more.  When he realize he had no more rice, he struggled to sit up while moving his hand to his plate, grabbing a handful of applesauce and trying to stuff it in his mouth, all the while squealing at those who had backed away from the table in side-splitting hilarity.

 

Etta swooped in and handed Shiloh a towel at the same time she took Abel. After wiping rice from his face, she tapped Shiloh on the shoulder to get her attention, then tucked one of Abel’s arms under her arm while holding the other with her hand.  She then proceeded to shovel rice into his mouth as quickly as he could take it.  This gave him no time to do anything but swallow.

 

Shiloh propped her elbow on the table and dropped her chin into her hand, sheepishly glancing back at Etta.

 

Adam had turned away from the table as he laughed, but turned back to Shiloh, trying his best to regain his composure. “Sweetheart…” he said through stifled chuckles.   He lowered his head battling more, but eventually looked back up.  “Shiloh…Sweetheart…”  Moving his arm around her shoulders, he said, “That wasn’t nearly as bad as pancakes and maple syrup, now was it?”

 

Moving her hand over her mouth, she grunted, then laughed herself.  “No.  No, I suppose it wasn’t.  But you can’t keep laughing at him at the table.  You’re encouraging unacceptable behavior.”

 

Joe and Hoss had turned back to the table, still occasionally chuckling.  “You’re right, Shiloh,” said Joe.  “We certainly wouldn’t want him to have anything but the best manners.”  A wink at Hoss started Hoss laughing all over again.

 

“Shucks, Shiloh. He’s a Cartwright,” Hoss said. “You can’t expect he’ll ever have perfect manners.”

 

Adam stabbed the air with his fork, aiming it at Hoss.  “That might be true if he were your son.  He’s not which means he’s perfectly capable of having good manners at the table.”

 

Ben had been watching from his chair at the head of the table, leaning back with his legs comfortably crossed, sipping his coffee with an amused grin.  “None of you had good manners until you were at least eight or nine.”  He turned to Adam.  “And that includes you,” he said, nodding at Adam.  “Seems to me, he’s got a while to go before it’s required.”

 

“Etta, would you finish feeding him and get him ready for bed, please?  I’ll be up in a little while.”  Moving her napkin to her lap, Shiloh began preparing her plate.  “It will be required as soon as he begins to feed himself.  I will not have his manners sullied by any of you men.  Is that understood?”

 

With an impish grin, Adam leaned into his wife.  “He’s a boy.  Let him be a boy,” he said proudly, kissing her cheek.

 

“All right. As long as you clean him up after dinner,” she answered, wagging her head with a cheeky smile.

 

Ben laughed.  “It’s good to have you all home.”  With that said, everyone smiled around the table.  “Now, Shiloh, I hear you were able to sing several times while you were in San Francisco.”

 

“Yes.  Tom Maguire came by the house and said his patrons had been asking after me, so I agreed to do several special appearances.  Mind you, I didn’t do the entire night.  I didn’t have enough time to prepare that many pieces.  But his orchestra remembered most of what I had already done, so Tom took requests for specific songs.”

 

“Well, the reporters certainly enjoyed it,” said Ben.  “They wrote that it was as much a pleasant surprise as a welcome change.  And they speculated if you might be retiring now that you have a child.”

 

Shiloh quickly glanced at Adam. “I really hadn’t thought about retiring,” she said quietly. “It’s just taken time to recover from Abel’s birth.  And Adam has been so busy with Slater and Cartwright.”  Her smile left her as she turned back to her plate.

 

Adam’s smile disappeared as well as he gave her a sidelong look, wondering if his work had interfered that much with her musical pursuits.

 

“Adam, I hear you’re designing a mansion for Billy Ralston,” said Ben.

 

Adam’s eyes lingered on his wife before he turned his attention to his father.  “Yes, but I’m one of two architects working on the house.  We’re expanding an Italian villa about twenty-five miles south of the city.  And we have the Jackson Square apartments and several houses in the city we’re designing and building.  The foreman on the courthouse construction works for Slater and Cartwright now, so we’ll have someone overseeing the construction of our projects.”

 

“So business is good.  That’s good, Son.”

 

“Robert will be interviewing for an apprentice.”

 

“Hey Adam,” started Hoss.  “Does that mean you ain’t gonna be around here as much?  ‘Cause if you ain’t, we’re gonna have to hire that foreman you talked about.”

 

“You need to hire a foreman whether I’m here or not.”  He turned to his father.  “You haven’t hired anyone?”

 

Taking a deep breath, Ben grunted.  “Well, I have interviewed several men.  But no, I haven’t hired one.”

 

Adam looked accusingly at his father as his chewing noticeably slowed.

 

“Now Adam, I just haven’t had the time.  We’ve all been busy.”

 

“I know you have, Pa, but I gave you the names of some good men.  Any one of them would make a good foreman.”

 

Feeling the tension between Adam and his father begin to fill the air, Shiloh changed the subject.  “Annie, did you get the birthing tables and the instruments we shipped?”

 

“Yes, and they look as good as they did in the catalog.  I just haven’t been able to use them yet.  Not many women are going to come here to have their baby.”  She took a bite of chicken, then wiped her chin.  “I can imagine how uncomfortable they’d feel giving birth in a strange house.  It would be different if I had a surgery,” she said, glancing Adam’s way.

 

“I almost forgot,” Adam answered after he swallowed a sip of water.  “I brought some drawings to show you, and I’ve started the plans for the house.  But I need your opinion about a few things before I go any further.”

 

With a fork in one hand, a knife in the other and a mouth full of food, Hoss replied, “If that ain’t about the best news we’ve heard.”  He furrowed his brow.  “Not that we don’t like livin’ here, Pa.  It’s just that Annie needs a place for women to come to her.  She could take care of a lot more if she had an office of her own.”

 

Setting her fork on her plate, Shiloh leaned back in her chair wearing a warm smile.  “You’re very proud of Annie, aren’t you, Hoss.”

 

Blushing, Hoss said, “Yes’m.  I reckon I am.  It’s just always been the four of us helpin’ folks, but there wadn’t much any of us could do for the women folk, and they’re the ones livin’ out here is harder on.”

 

A look of quiet understanding passed between Annie and Shiloh.  Of all the Cartwrights, both women knew it was Hoss who had the softer heart where the weakest of man, woman and child were concerned.  That included most men as just about everyone in these parts was smaller or weaker than Hoss.

 

When Hop Sing came out of the kitchen with dessert, the two ladies passed.  Hop Sing fussed, but they assured him they would have some a little later in the evening before they excused themselves and went upstairs.

 

Adam watched as they left the table, following Shiloh with his eyes until she disappeared around the corner at the top of the stairs.

 

Squeezing Adam’s arm, Ben asked quietly, “Is there something you want to talk about?”

 

Turning back to the table, Adam moved his hand to the lower part of his face and rubbed at the same time he lifted his eyes to his brothers across the table.

 

Hoss saw the worried look, then elbowed Joe.  “Come on, Shortshanks.  Let’s me and you finish dessert out on the porch.”

 

Joe was oblivious to the tense silence.  Looking up, he said, “Oh. Sure,” as he looked from his brother to his father, then stood, following Hoss out of the dining room without a word.

 

Moving his elbows to the table and clasping his hands, Ben waited for Adam, knowing he would speak after he had carefully thought out what he would say.

 

Adam pushed his food around his plate. “She wants another baby.”

 

Ben snorted.  “Well, is there anything wrong with that?”

 

“Ordinarily no, Pa, if having another one doesn’t kill her.”  Standing, Adam dropped his napkin on the table and strode stiffly to the leather chair, sitting heavily and throwing his leg over the arm.   There he waited, pinching his bottom lip between two fingers as he stared into the fire.

 

Chapter Forty-One

 

“I don’t know how you expect me to lay there with Paul Martin doing what you’re doing,” said Shiloh.  “It’s hard enough with you doing it.”  When Annie didn’t say anything, Shiloh added, “How come men don’t have to go through this?”  Still, she got nothing from Annie who was concentrating on what she was feeling.  “Are you listening to me?”

 

“Men don’t have a vagina or a uterus, nor do they have babies.  Now hush.”

 

Shiloh clasped her hands below her chest and glared at the ceiling.

 

“Tell me if this hurts,” said Annie as she pressed around Shiloh’s groin and hips. When she finished, she asked, “Nothing?”

 

“Other than a little pressure, no.  It doesn’t hurt.”

 

“You said you were sore after riding.  Where’s the soreness?”

 

Moving her eyes from one side to the other as she thought, Shiloh answered, “It’s muscle soreness.  It doesn’t hurt in the joints like it did after Abel came.”

 

“Have you been doing what Cheron suggested?”  When Shiloh nodded, Annie said, “Show me.”

 

After pulling on her bloomers, Shiloh squatted and stood back up.

 

“That looked easy.  Do it again.”

 

Again, Shiloh squatted.  And then squatted again.  “It doesn’t hurt.  I could do this all day.”

 

“All right then.  Get dressed.”

 

“Is that all?”

 

“Do you want there to be more?”

 

Straightening her dress so she could pull it over her head, Shiloh said, “No.  But…well?”

 

“Shiloh, I see no reason why you can’t have another child,” said Annie as she put her instruments away.  “But you know Adam will want Dr. Martin’s opinion, and part of that opinion will be that there are always risks.  It’s true, there are.  But in your case, no more than any other healthy twenty-five-year-old woman.”

 

Once Shiloh was dressed, the two women talked quietly as they walked down the hall to the stairs.  “Can you tell him what you said…about risks and me being healthy?”

 

Annie shrugged. “I can tell him, but that won’t change his mind about seeing Dr. Martin.”

 

Stopping, Shiloh turned and took Annie’s hands, pleading, “You will come with us, won’t you?”

 

Drawing Shiloh into a hug, Annie replied, “Of course I’ll come.”  Then she laughed.  “It’s hard to believe we’re even talking about this.  A couple of years ago you had decided you weren’t going to have children…or a husband for that matter.”

 

Shiloh moved her arm around Annie as they continued to the stairs.  “Good thing I reconsidered.  You might not have ever met Hoss if I hadn’t.”

 

***

 

Ben filled his coffee cup and took it to the other leather chair.  “Adam, she seems fine.  Didn’t Paul tell you she probably wouldn’t have another large baby?”

 

Without moving his hand from his mouth, Adam answered, “He did, Pa, but what if she does?  And what if she can’t because of what having Abel might have caused?”

 

“Adam, there’s always a risk…for all women, healthy or otherwise.”  When Adam’s worried expression didn’t change, Ben went on.  “Annie’s a very capable doctor.  The women in the area love her.  She’s already delivered five babies.”

 

With furrowed brows, Adam drew his lips into a tight line as he glanced over at his father. “She asked for Paul after Abel was born because she didn’t have the experience to deal with Shiloh’s problem.  What if Shiloh has the same problem?   Cheron won’t be here to help, and even if she was, I’m not sure I’d allow Shiloh to go through that again.”

 

“And if Paul says there’s no reason she can’t…”  Ben looked over at his son.  “…what are you going to do?”  When Adam winced at his father, Ben lowered his face, keeping his eyes on Adam’s and raising his brows.

 

A smile tugged at the corner of Adam’s mouth.  “I guess I’ll get over it.”  Standing, Adam propped a foot on the hearth and crossed his arms.  “I told her we could adopt.”  Looking back over his shoulder, he added, “But it would be nice to have more children of our own.”

 

Before Adam realized it, Ben was at his side moving a hand to his shoulder.  “If Shiloh is all right, wouldn’t you eventually regret that you didn’t?”

 

Both men looked up at the sound of footsteps on the stairs.  Adam’s expression was particularly expectant.

 

“Adam, you’ll be happy to know your wife is perfectly healthy, and I see no reason she can’t have more children,” said Annie as the two women reached the bottom of the stairs.

 

Adam wasn’t prepared to accept Annie’s diagnosis on its own merit and gave Shiloh a sidelong look.  She had already promised she’d see Paul Martin regardless of Annie’s opinion, and he was bound and determined to hold her to it even if he had to carry her bodily to the buggy and tie her in tomorrow morning.

 

Shiloh rolled her eyes.  “I told you I would also get Dr. Martin’s opinion, and I will do so.  But Annie is going with us.  He may forego another examination once he speaks with her.”  When Adam opened his mouth to object, she pointed a finger at him.  “You have no reason to question Paul’s judgment if he feels he doesn’t need to examine me.”

 

“I would feel better if he did,” Adam said insistently.

 

Exasperated, Shiloh replied, “Adam, Annie is my doctor.  After tomorrow, I won’t be seeing Paul again unless there’s an emergency, and Annie isn’t available.”

 

Stepping into her, Adam arched an eyebrow as he looked down on her, causing her to pucker her mouth and blow heavily out her nose.

 

“Yes, you’re bigger than me, but being a bully isn’t very becoming on you.”  As he continued his light glare, she broke their gaze first and looked away.

 

A crooked smile appeared on Adam’s face.  She had begun to acquiesce more easily the longer they were together, and in some small way it pleased him.  In other ways, it saddened him. His smile faded.  Though their disagreements weren’t his favorite thing, he appreciated she could argue intelligently, and though she sometimes bickered…like a woman…she was slowly growing out of it.  He didn’t want her to be subservient, and he certainly didn’t want a shrew.  She was the happy medium.

 

Shiloh relaxed.  “There’s no point in arguing.  I’ve already told you I’d see Paul.”  At that, Adam’s smile returned which brought one more remark from Shiloh. “But this is the last time.”

 

Pushing his bottom lip up, he nodded.  “We’ll see.”

 

Her head snapped up and her eyes flashed blue like the flame of a hot fire, but before she could say anything, Annie rushed by, taking her arm in arm and hustling her to the kitchen.  “We promised Hop Sing we’d be back for dessert,” Annie said as she drew Shiloh around the corner toward the kitchen.

 

Adam blew a breath out of puffed out cheeks as he watched Annie give Shiloh a little push into the kitchen.  “Come on, Hoss.  I’ll show you the drawings.”

 

With Adam and Shiloh separated, all had quieted in the house.  Annie and Shiloh sat at the kitchen table working on larger than normal portions of peach cobbler with fresh, cold cream and staying relatively quiet until Shiloh looked up at Annie.  “What about you and Hoss?”

 

Annie looked up from her dish.  “What about us?”

 

“Any plans to have children?”

 

Moving a bite to her mouth, Annie moved her eyes to the ceiling.  “Well…we’re not doing anything to prevent it.”

 

Shiloh continued to look down at her cobbler, but it wasn’t difficult for Annie to see her big smile.

 

“We’re happy, Shiloh.  I’m happy.  Hoss seems happy.  And when a child comes…well…we’ll still be happy.”

 

***

 

“What’s this square here, Adam?” asked Hoss.

 

Standing, Adam looked over the drawing.  “That’s a washroom…like the one we have next to our bedroom, only this one is downstairs.  It’ll be shared by the main house and Annie’s surgery.  She said she wanted her patients to be able to get to it.”

 

Hoss furrowed his brow. “I kinda like the idea of havin’ one next to the bedroom.”

 

“Not to worry.  Your bedroom is downstairs right here,” Adam said, pointing to rectangle on the drawing.  “Annie also wanted your bedroom to be downstairs so she could get some rest if she had an overnight patient, but still be close enough to hear a call for help.  This drawing is the main floor.”  Pulling another drawing beside the first, Adam continued.  This is the second floor over the main house, but not the surgery, even though the surgery is part of the house.”

 

“Old brother, you’ll make a fine archy-tec one day,” teased Hoss.  “But you said you couldn’t go no further without some answers.”

 

“This is the floor plan,” said Adam.  “But it’s not the elevation.  I need to know how you want the house to sit on the property.  We’ll have to go out and make sure we can build the foundation where you want it, and then take some measurements to see how the foundation has to be built.  Then we’ll have to make sure we can get buggies and wagons to the house.”  As Hoss nodded, Adam added, “And I’m sure you’ll want a barn.”

 

Smiling, Hoss said, “Can’t even move in without a barn.  Horses have go to someplace.”

 

Adam chuckled.  “I’ll want Annie to see the room arrangement.  Especially the kitchen. She may want it moved.  And if you’re working your own herd, we’ll have to talk about a bunkhouse.”

 

“Adam, I don’t really see any point in buildin’ my own herd,” said Hoss as he sat back in his chair.  “You’ve got the Flying W to think about, but I sorta figure the rest of it’s the Ponderosa.  Ain’t no reason to separate it.  Anyway, how’s Pa gonna take care of it all by hisself?”

 

Adam gave his brother a rather melancholy smile.  He’d always wanted to build something of his own, and he was doing just that, but Hoss was right.  There would always be that connection.

 

Annie and Shiloh came out of the kitchen with the coffee service and sat it on the low table in front of the fire.

 

“Hoss, Adam, would you like some coffee?” asked Shiloh as she poured a cup and passed it to Ben who was sitting in the leather chair next to the fireplace, reading.

 

Smiling, Ben said, “Thank you,” and went back to his newspaper.

 

“Annie,” said Adam.  “Take a look at these drawings, and tell me if you want any of the rooms moved.”

 

The two ladies took coffee to the round table where the drawings lay, and as the men took their respective cups, they separated so that the women stood between them, Annie standing next to Adam.

 

“You’ll have to tell me what I’m looking at, Adam.”

 

As Adam pointed to each room on the drawing and told Annie what it was, Annie nodded, listening carefully.  “Can you move the kitchen to the other side of the house?  I don’t really think I want it near our bedroom or the surgery because of the noise.  And I’d like a small stove in the surgery so we can heat water without having to carry it through the house.”

 

“That means you’d have to have a stove for the surgery and the washroom,” said Adam.  “What if we did this?” he said as he drew more lines on the paper.  “If we move this wall out for the washroom, we can put a small pass-through here between the washroom and the surgery with enough room for a small stove and storage for linens, wash bowls and pots for the water. There’s going to be a pump in the washroom, so you can get water from there.”

 

Smiling, Annie replied, “Oh, that’s perfect.”  Looking at Shiloh, she said, “I’ve never had a washroom like this in the house.  We always had to move a tub into a bedroom and haul water up the stairs.”

 

Shiloh laughed.  “Well, you won’t have to do that anymore.”  She stole a proud look at Adam.  She had begun to believe there was nothing he couldn’t do.

 

Catching the look, Adam looked at Shiloh with content in his eyes.  He inhaled deeply and reached for her hand.  “We need to get home and get Abel settled.  We don’t want him off his schedule,” he said, turning to Hoss and Annie who were standing arm and arm looking at the plans for their new home.

 

“How long’s he sleepin’ now?” asked Hoss.

 

Moving his arm around Shiloh, Adam answered, “Through the night,” then kissed his wife’s head.

 

Chapter Forty-Two

 

Walking into the bedroom from the nursery, Shiloh began to button up her flannel gown.  Adam had just come into the room after unhitching the buggy, and brushing out and feeding the horses for the evening.  He paused at the door when he saw Shiloh, and keeping his eyes on her, he slightly turned and closed the door.  “Is he already asleep?”

 

She smiled.  “Poor little boy.  He was tired.  He didn’t even take much milk before he was out.”

 

By this time, Adam was standing in front of her.  When he stepped into her, she smiled nervously and took a step back.  For each step she took back, he took a step forward, slowly raising his hands and moving them to her waist.

 

With her back against the wall, she sucked in a quiet breath.  “Adam?”

 

Lifting her up until her eyes were level with his, he pressed his body into hers at the same time he gently sucked her bottom lip into his mouth, then kissed it.

 

She started to say his name, but he stopped her with another kiss.

 

“What are you doing, Adam?” she whispered.

 

“I’m having a moment with the woman I love,” he said softly, then again pressed his lips to hers.  His kiss was slow and wet as he lightly touched his tongue to the tip of hers. Feeling her breath quickening, he moved his hands to the back of her thighs and lifted her up, moving her legs around him. He drew his lips from her chin down her neck as her head tilted back against the wall, giving him full access.

 

“Adam,” she whispered.  “You have to stop.”

 

“Tell me you don’t want me, and I’ll stop,” he said in a quiet but deep, husky voice as he continued his seduction, covering her mouth in a ravenous kiss.

 

She knew she had to stop him now before it was too late. Turning her head away, she placed her fingers on his lips.  “It doesn’t matter how much we want each other.  You have to stop.”

 

Looking into her eyes, he narrowed his as his hands moved over her, caressing her skin, bringing forth a shuddering breath from her.

 

Still, she whispered, “Please stop.” She moved her hands to either side of his face and kissed him tenderly.  “If Paul finds something tomorrow, and there’s a child because of this, you’ll never forgive yourself. I don’t think I could live knowing how the guilt would tear you apart.”  She knew he was thinking about it.  She could feel the muscles of his jaws working.  “Just one more night.”

 

Burying his face against her neck, he thought for only a moment before he held her against him, carrying her to the bed and laying her down, lingering over her.  He moved his hands to gently caress her face and kissed her lovingly.  “I’m going out for a while.”  With his cheek on hers, he whispered in her ear.  “Don’t wait up for me.  Please.”  Kissing her once more, he stood while holding her hands and kissed them before he turned and left the bedroom.

 

Shiloh covered her face with her hands as she trembled.  She’d wanted nothing more than for him to lose control for the last three weeks, something she thought he would never do, and now that he had, she couldn’t let him go on until he had his own confirmation.  As much as she wanted him to stay, she wouldn’t go looking for him, and she knew he wouldn’t come back to the bedroom tonight. Pulling the covers over her, she rolled to her side, brought her knees up to her chest and waited for sleep to take her.

 

Adam stopped at the bottom of the stairs and looked back over his shoulder.  The fire in him had not quite died.  He wanted to run back up the stairs, but he wouldn’t because she was right.  He needed to hear that his wife was healthy from someone he trusted implicitly.  Heading to the kitchen, he filled a canteen, then took his jacket and gun belt to the barn where he saddled Sport.  There was a certain place near the shore of the lake where he camped as a younger man…when he needed to be alone for whatever reason.  Tonight he would fall asleep to the watery whispers of his first love rather than to the gentle breaths and lingering smile of the love of his life.

 

After he built a fire, he rolled out his bed roll, laid down on his back and looked up at the stars.  Eventually, he looked up the mountain where he could see the outline of the house against the night sky through the trees.  Just the knowledge that she was that close was enough to ignite the fire in his gut again.  Moving to his side away from the view of the house, he gazed out over the lake, but still couldn’t relax.

 

The wind coming off the lake gave him a chill. Sitting up, his eyes darted left and right, and then focused on the lake.  Suddenly, he grabbed the heel of a boot and threw it off, followed by the other.  In another minute, he was completely naked and scrambling down the boulders that led into the shallows.  Turning, he looked up at the house, blew his wife a kiss, and fell backwards into the cold water.

 

The next morning, Shiloh was at the dining table feeding Abel when Adam came through the front door with a hand on the small of his back.  She watched him as he sat down in his chair at the head of the table.  “Are you all right?”

 

“Cold water, hard ground…dew.”

 

“Where did you go?”

 

“Down to the lake.”

 

She snorted.

 

“You’re laughing at me?”

 

“No.  No, my love.  Why didn’t you go over to the main house?  They’d have understood without you uttering a word.”

 

Creasing his brows as he lowered his jaw with his mouth closed, he answered sarcastically, “They don’t need to understand.”

 

Ming Ling brought in plates of eggs, bacon, and biscuits followed by juice, butter and jam.  The coffee pot was already on the table.

 

Flipping his napkin out to unfold it, Adam moved it to his lap and poured himself some coffee.

 

“And what about the sofa?”

 

He shifted his eyes to hers.  “Do I have to explain?”

 

Laughing, she said, “No, of course not.”  She shoveled some applesauce into Abel’s mouth. Her eyes softened when she glanced at Adam.  “It’ll be over soon enough.”

 

He responded by raising his brows and twisting his mouth.

 

Within a half hour, Adam was waiting outside with the buggy hitched.  Shiloh stepped out of the front door carrying Abel with Etta and Rachel following behind.  After Adam helped everyone into the buggy, they were off to the main house to pick up Annie who was waiting with Hoss on the front porch.

 

Annie kissed Hoss goodbye, then tiptoed to give Adam a kiss on the cheek when she accepted his help into the back seat with Etta and Rachel.

 

He listened to the ladies talk among themselves the entire ride into town, and thought it curious that the reason for their trip was never brought up.  Every now and then he’d glance over at Shiloh, and it was as if she hadn’t a worry in the world, though he knew she did.  She was hiding it well.

 

It was a completely different story when he stopped the buggy in front of Dr. Martin’s office, and when it was her turn to be helped down, she hesitated.  Adam stepped closer to her.  “Worried?”

 

Her smile disappeared as quickly as it had appeared.  “What if…?”  Her brows furrowed as her eyes became moist.

 

“Annie said you’re fine.  Are you worried she missed something?”

 

Taking a deep breath, she replied, “No.  But what if Dr. Martin…what if he tells you what he thinks you want to hear?”

 

Adam’s mouth dropped open.  “Shiloh, I don’t want to hear anything except that you’re healthy.  We’re here to make sure nothing’s missed.”

 

As the others waited on the boardwalk, Adam reached into the buggy and lifted Shiloh off the seat, gently setting her feet on the ground.  Offering his arm to her, he said, “The sooner we get this over with, the sooner we can…”  he cleared his throat, “celebrate.”

 

Adam held the door of Dr. Martin’s office open for the women.  Etta entered carrying Abel with Rachel behind her and followed by Annie.  Shiloh stopped on the porch, and when Annie realized she wasn’t right behind her, she turned, grabbed Shiloh’s hand and pulled her inside, leaning into her as they ventured further into the office.  “I don’t know why you’re nervous.  There’s nothing wrong with you.”

 

“Good.  Why don’t you go in and tell Dr. Martin that so we can go.”

 

“And you think Adam’s going to let you get away with that?”

 

Shiloh groaned.

 

“Adam, Shiloh, I’ve been expecting you.”  Dr. Martin turned to Annie.  “And who do I have to thank for you coming with them?  He took her hands. “It’s always good to see you.”

 

Grimacing, Annie said simply, “Shiloh.”

 

Paul looked over at Shiloh, and seeing her face ashen and her eyes cast down, he said, “Oh.  I see.  Well, why don’t you come into the back room, so we can find out how you are?” said Dr. Martin, stepping to one side, waiting for Shiloh, Annie and Adam to enter.

 

“Dr. Martin, I should tell you I examined Shiloh last night,” said Annie.

 

“And what did you find?”

 

Standing with her hands clasped in front of her, she answered, “I found her to be in excellent health.  I don’t believe she’ll have any problems related to Abel’s birth with another child.”

 

Paul looked from one face to another with a look of confusion.  “Then why are you here?”

 

Both women glared at Adam, who chuckled rather stuntedly, looking as if he’d been put on the spot…which he had.  He took a deep breath and scratched his nose.  “I…ah…well…considering Annie was uncomfortable with Shiloh’s hip problems after Abel was born, I thought it would be best to have both opinions.”

 

“All right.  Annie, would you tell me what you did and what you found?”

 

Annie went through her examination, and once she was finished, he nodded.  “Sounds quite thorough to me?  You said Shiloh had no pain?”

 

“Yes, that’s right.”

 

“Shiloh, I’d like you to remove your dress, petticoat and corset and lay down on the exam table.”

 

Closing her eyes, Shiloh trudged over to the table.  Annie went with her to help her out of her dress.

 

“Should I leave?” asked Adam.

 

“No, that won’t be necessary.  I don’t think there’s anything more I’ll find from an internal examination.  But I would like to see if I can find any pain with the connective tissues and Shiloh’s hips.  That’s really my only concern.”

 

Adam looked puzzled.  “Well, why wouldn’t you be concerned about another large baby?”

 

Paul turned squarely to Adam so the ladies couldn’t hear their conversation.  Lowering his voice, he said, “Adam, I already told you it’s not likely she’ll have another large baby.  What worries me most would be an inability for her to carry a child to full term if there’s still a problem with her hips or the connective tissue.”

 

Adam bit the inside of his cheek.

 

Annie helped Shiloh up on the table and held her hand as she laid down.

 

“Annie, you can stay there,” said Paul.  Shiloh, I’m going to press fairly hard around your hips and abdomen.  I want you to stop me at the first hint of any pain.  All right?” he said, smiling at her.

 

She stiffened at the touch of his fingers and kept her eyes on the ceiling.  When Paul dug in, she flinched.  “That hurt.”

 

“What hurt?”

 

“You’re fingernail.”

 

Paul chuckled and continued his exam.  “Would you lift your leg up as straight as you can?”  She did with ease. “Now the other one.”  Again, she had no trouble.

 

“Dr. Martin, Cheron told Shiloh to squat to build those muscles,” said Annie.  “I had her squat for me, and she did easily without any pain.”

 

“Oh?”  Paul took Shiloh’s hand and pulled her up to a sitting position.  “How often do you do Cheron’s exercises, Shiloh?”

 

“Every day.  Anytime I need to pick something up off the floor or ground, I don’t bend.  I squat.”

 

“Climb down here and show me,” he said.

 

Shiloh obliged and squatted several times.  In fact, she just kept squatting until he asked her to stop.

 

“I’ll have to remember this.  Indian women probably do this all the time.  I think it’s possibly the best exercise a woman can do to strengthen those muscles.”  He shook his head and looked over at Annie.  “It seems Cheron is still teaching us some new things.”

 

Annie smiled and nodded.

 

“Adam, take your wife home.  There’s nothing wrong with her.”

 

“Wait. You said you were more worried about her ability to carry a child full term.  Does this mean you’re not worried?”

 

Moving his arm over Adam’s shoulder, Dr. Martin walked Adam to the door. “There’s always a risk when a woman has a child no matter how healthy she is.  But if I was a betting man, I’d say that Shiloh is better able to carry a child than most women in this city.  She rides horses regularly, and she’s taken Cheron’s advice to heart.  You need to stop worrying.”   When Adam flared his nostrils and puckered his lips, Dr. Martin looked behind him for the ladies, who were still in the back room getting Shiloh redressed, then motioned for Adam to walk out the door in front of him.  Standing on the front porch, Paul spoke somewhat sternly.  “Adam, Annie is probably more qualified than I am to tell you if things internally look normal.  She specialized in women’s hygiene and health issues, and she was taught the most current information.  I get my information out of journals.  The women here and in Carson City have commented about how much more she can tell them about themselves.  You need to learn to trust her with Shiloh.  She’s a very capable woman’s doctor.”

 

Chapter Forty-Three

 

Annie and Etta spoke quietly in the back seat of the buggy while Adam held Abel on his lap, letting the reins fall loosely between his hands so that Abel could play. Shiloh sat and occasionally glanced up at her husband as she watched Abel happily gurgle, squeal at the horses and try to put the reins in his mouth, something that his mother would not allow.

 

Neither Shiloh nor Adam tried any adult conversation, though they did discuss everything under God’s sky with Abel.

 

Hoss was waiting for Annie at the table on the front porch.  When the buggy pulled into the yard he was standing next to it by the time Adam pulled the horses to a stop.  “That didn’t take so long.  Everything all right?”

 

Smiling, Annie kissed Hoss as he placed her feet on the ground. “Everything’s fine.”  Turning, she leaned in for a hug from Shiloh, and waved goodbye to Rachel.  “Etta, if you’d prefer, I can come by the house, or you can come here.  Whichever you like.”

 

“Thank you, Miss Annie.  I’ll come by tomorrow.”

 

“You and Hoss should come over for dinner this weekend,” said Shiloh.  “How about Friday evening?”

 

“Now Shiloh, you know Friday is fried chicken night,” said Hoss with a teasing smile.

 

“Well, look at it this way. Hop Sing will get a break from catching and plucking all those chickens.  Besides, we just had fried chicken last night.  But, if you come over you’ll get…”  Shiloh folded her lips into a tight line trying to hide her smile. “Do you remember Danny Lynch and his mother?”

 

“Well, yeah, I do,” said Hoss with his brows furrowed.  “But how do you?  You wadn even here.”

 

Glancing over at Adam, she giggled.  “Oh, I heard about it.  I also heard about the fish and chips she made for the party.  Well, she wrote down the directions on a piece of paper in the kitchen.  It was still there when Hop Sing got home, and he shared it with Ming Lin.”

 

“Are you saying Ming Lin’s makin’ Mrs. Lynch’s fish and chips for dinner Friday?”   Hoss looked at her in askance as he licked his lips.  When Shiloh nodded, he looked at Annie with smiling eyes, and said, “We wouldn miss it.  Would we?”

 

Laughing, Annie wrapped her arms around one of his. “No, we wouldn’t.”

 

“See you Friday,” said Adam as he flicked the reins, sending the horses out of the yard.

 

Shiloh turned and waved, then looked at Adam.  “That was rude.”

 

“I have work to do.”

 

“Don’t be such a sorehead.  Adam….”  She stopped, not wanting to argue in front of Etta or Rachel…or Abel who was looking intently at her.  She didn’t say another word all the way home.

 

Shiloh took Abel to the bedroom and stayed there while Adam retreated to his office.  She was angry certainly.  She’d done what he wanted, even though Dr. Martin hadn’t agreed  with Adam that he needed to examine her.  It didn’t matter.   Adam was angry because it didn’t turn out the way he wanted it.  “Just like Adam Cartwright.  I thought he’d changed.”

 

She’d been rocking Abel in the chair and looked down at him as he struggled against sleep.  She remembered hoping that he’d look more like his father, especially since he was his firstborn.   But his eyes were blue, like Micah’s…like hers, and according to Dr. Martin, at his age, they’d probably stay blue.  He had dark, fine hair, but it had a red shine under bright light, like Micah…like her.  Abel did have dimples, but then so did she and Micah.

 

Slowly standing so as not to wake him, she gently laid Abel down in the bed, then walked to the window and looked out over the lake.  Anger was pointless and probably unjustified.  She smiled at the thought that her old feelings from when she was very young still crept in so quickly.  Her husband wasn’t selfish.  Something Paul said to him must have disturbed him.

 

Lightly kissing the baby, she left the room, leaving the door open, and walked quietly down the stairs after she asked Etta to listen for Abel.  “I’ll be in Adam’s office if you need me.”

 

Adam sat with his elbows propped on his desk and his chin resting in his hands.  The thought Shiloh might miscarry a baby had never crossed his mind. He wondered how either one of them would deal with such a tragedy.

 

Shiloh slipped in so quietly, he didn’t hear until she slowly closed the door.  He didn’t move except for arching an eyebrow as his eyes searched her face.

 

“What did Paul say to you?” she asked quietly.

 

The office was quiet but for a sigh from Adam.  He didn’t move for a moment, then spoke with his chin still resting in his hands.  “He said I worry too much, and to bring you home.”

 

She smiled, her eyes squinting only slightly.  Adam Cartwright was never unsure, even when he was frightened or worried about her.  He was sure he was worried, and he was sure why.  Except now.  She got the feeling something was bothering him that he couldn’t quite put his finger on, and with that, doubt was creeping in as to whether he should be worried.   So, he brooded.  That’s when he did his deepest thinking.

 

Taking a step forward, she bowed her head, and moved her eyes up to his.  “Can I help?”

 

Still, he didn’t move.  He just maintained his gaze upon her.  He came to the conclusion she really didn’t have a clue what was bothering him.  And he didn’t want her to because it was…irrational.  But Paul had said it, and now it was stuck in his head.  He’d said he was more worried that she wouldn’t be able to carry a child full term, but then he said that was risk for all women.

 

He hadn’t heard her come forward to the desk, hadn’t felt her move next to him, so he flinched when she placed her hand gently on his shoulder and moved it across his back.

 

“He said I was healthier that most of the woman in Virginia City, Adam.  That’s the last thing he said.”  Slowly swinging his desk chair around to face her, she sat on his lap and moved her arms around his neck.  “I told you before.  I’m not going to die.”  She kissed him tenderly.  “You are not going to lose me.”  Brushing a curl on his forehead aside, she said, “And now that I’ve said that, I can’t die because I’m just too stubborn, and headstrong and willful.  Only this time, I have no one to prove wrong…unless you’re going to continue to think something is wrong.  Then I have to prove you wrong, so you see, I have no intention of making you right.”  Through this whole line of thought, she was shaking her head and rolling her eyes, and by the time she was done, he was fighting a smile.  “You’re trying too hard not to smile, and in the process you’re depriving me of something wonderfully magnificent.”

 

Now he laughed and finally relaxed, leaning back in his chair and pulling her against him.  “I’m sorry.”

 

“Don’t apologize. You’re entitled, considering we’ve both been…worried.  But there’s nothing wrong with me.”  She gave him a seductive smile and moved her lips to his…almost.  “Don’t you think it’s time we got back to…normal,” she said just before she playfully kissed him.

 

He chuckled and joined her, and as their breathing became deeper and heavier, Adam lifted her up on the desk, and the rest was…well…normal for a young, healthy married couple.

 

***

 

Annie stood at the front door of Adam and Shiloh’s house waiting for Hoss to come up the stairs with his companion.   Of course, Adam and Shiloh didn’t know they’d be bringing a someone else, but neither Hoss nor Annie thought they’d mind.  Considering this was only Adam and Shiloh’s fourth day home from San Francisco, Annie and Hoss’s guest was sure they wouldn’t mind either, and even if they did, they’d get over it pretty quickly considering what they were about to see.

 

Shiloh was still upstairs finishing up with Abel when Adam heard a knock at the door.  Standing from the chair where he was reading the Enterprise, he walked swiftly to the door, and upon opening it, a wide grin spread across his lips at the sight of Annie with Hoss standing behind her.   “Annie, Hoss, come in.  Dinner’s almost ready,” he said, stepping to one side.  “Shiloh’s still upstairs, if you want to go up, Annie.  But she should be down in a minute.”

 

Annie smiled as if she was expecting…something.  “I think I’ll just wait down here.”

 

Adam had been looking at Annie and hadn’t noticed Hoss, who was waiting for his guest to enter as it took a little extra time.  He turned as Hoss came through the door taking up the whole space at first.

 

When Hoss stepped aside, Adam felt as if the breath had been knocked out of him.  He swayed slightly as tears stung his eyes.  “You…you wait right there.  Don’t move,” he said haltingly as he turned toward the stairs.  Stopping, he looked back.  “Can you wait there for a few minutes longer?”

 

A nod sent Adam striding up the stairs. “Shiloh!”

 

Shiloh had just laid Abel down and had quietly gathered his dinner dishes when she heard Adam shouting.  She met him at the door just after he’d shouted again.  “What are you yelling about,” she quietly hissed.  It was too late.  Adam’s last shout startled Abel awake, and now he screamed at the top of his lungs as Adam reached the bedroom door.

 

Shiloh looked angrily up at him as she shoved the dishes into his hands and hurried back into the nursery.

 

Crooking his jaw, Adam froze until he heard Abel quiet down.  He blew a breath out through his lips when Shiloh emerged with Abel in her arms.

 

“You scared the dickens out of him, Adam.  What are you yelling about?”

 

Smiling, Adam set the dishes aside and took Abel.  “I think it would be best if I’m holding him when you see…”

 

“See what?”

 

Adam held out his hand.  “Come on.  You need to see for yourself.”

 

Closing her eyes, she pinched her lips together and breathed deeply, then hurried to the stairs.  She looked down, and seeing no one there, she looked back at Adam, who nodded her forward.  When she got to the bottom of the stairs, she saw Annie and Hoss.

 

“Shiloh, considering how Adam reacted, we thought we should prepare you first,” said Annie.

 

Looking back at Adam, who had followed her down the stairs, her mouth opened and her brows creased.  She looked back at Annie.  “Prepare me for what?”

 

“For me.”  The voice came from Hoss’s direction, but it wasn’t Hoss’s voice.

 

She looked around Hoss and seeing no furniture behind him of any kind, she sucked in a breath.  “Micah?” she whispered.  When Hoss stepped aside, her knees almost gave out, but she managed to recover and ran forward.

 

Hoss moved an arm around her, instantly halting her advance.  “He ain’t quite solid on them feet yet, Shiloh.”  When she nodded, he let her go.

 

She could say nothing.  She just looked upon her brother standing, albeit with the help of crutches, as tears streamed down her cheeks.  “Micah,” she half laughed, half cried.

 

It took several tense moments for Micah to reach her, and when he did, brother and sister embraced while everyone else stood back and sniffled.

 

“I need to sit down,” he whispered in her ear.

 

Hoss swiftly stepped in and under one of Micah’s arms and helped him to a chair while everyone claimed their own place in the living room.

 

Shiloh remained standing, shaking her head as she searched for words.  Wiping her face with her hands, she said, “Tell me.”

 

“There’s not much to tell at this point, Shiloh.  It’s been slow,” he said, taking her hand.  “I can’t walk very far, but I can move from a chair in one room to a chair in another.”

 

“What about the pain?”

 

“I’m still using Laudanum, so it’s tolerable.”

 

Ming Lin came in and bowed.  “Dinner is ready.”

 

No one moved.  No one said anything.  Except for Micah.  “Hey, I don’t know about you folks, but I’m hungry.”  He lifted a crutch from its position against a side table. As he struggled to his feet, Shiloh stepped in to help, but he waved her off.  “Little Sister, I have to get used to doing this by myself.”  Hoss passed him the other crutch, and he slowly straightened and walked to the dining room table with everyone else following.

 

“I’ll take him,” said Shiloh, reaching for Abel.

 

Looking down at Abel, whose little brows were close together matching the serious stiffness in his chin as he had been quietly keeping his eyes on the only one in the room he didn’t know, Adam answered, “I’ll hold him.  He’s quiet enough at the moment.”

 

Micah sat in the chair next to Shiloh.  “You know, I’m not surprised he doesn’t recognize me.  I haven’t seen him for months.”

 

Shiloh watched her brother as intently as Abel watched him.  She cleared her throat.  “You’re right.  It’s been too long.  And then we were gone for a month.”  She managed a smile.  “You’ll be happy to know he has our eyes and will probably have our hair.”

 

Leaning over the table, Micah looked closely.  “Why they are blue, aren’t they?”

 

The deepening furrow in Abel’s brows brought snickers from everyone around the table.

 

“I only saw him once, but then I wasn’t in any shape to really see him, was I?”

 

Dinner became quiet, but the conversation slowly turned to laughter as Adam and Hoss related the entire story of Danny Lynch and his mother, the well, the ruse, and how they had come to have fish and chips for dinner.

 

“And I hear there’s another house going up on the Ponderosa,” said Micah.  With a mouthful, he said, “By the way, this fish is really good.”

 

“I’ll tell Ming Lin you enjoyed it,” said Shiloh as she passed him the plate for more.

 

“Older brother Adam here,” said Hoss, motioning toward Adam, “is buildin’ me and Annie a house over at Hoss’s Heaven.”

 

Annie set her fork on her plate and moved her hands to her lap.  “Adam, we were wondering if…maybe…the house could be ready in…say…seven months.”

 

Adam’s eyes shifted expectantly to Shiloh’s, then across the table to Annie’s.  “Is there any particular reason it needs to be ready that soon?”

 

All eyes were on Annie, except Hoss’s.  He was looking down at his plate like he’d done something embarrassing.

 

When Shiloh’s face lit up, Annie held her hands up.  “Wait.  I’m not saying anything…for certain.  It’s really too early to know for sure.”

 

“But?”  said Shiloh.

 

“There have been some…signs,” Annie said, smiling timidly.

 

With a wide grin, Adam raised his glass in a toast.  “To possibilities.”  He looked over at Shiloh and winked before he drank.

 

After dinner, Shiloh excused herself with Abel, and Annie went with her while the men retreated to the living room and their coffee.

 

Each man knew the conversation was headed in a difficult direction, but it was Adam who finally started it.  “Did you hear anything from Roy…about Holman?” asked Adam.

 

“Yes,” said Micah, lowering his coffee cup to the saucer in the hand resting on his lap.  “Two Marshals have been sent to bring him back, and two have returned tied over their saddles.  Holman’s dug in deep.  I don’t know if anyone else will go.”

 

“Why aren’t they sendin’ in a posse instead of one Marshal?” asked Hoss, who had settled on the hearth.

 

Micah snorted.  “They did, Hoss.  They sent the second Marshal back as a message that no one else from the posse was coming back.”  He looked at his coffee cup and said quietly.  “They’re not sending anyone else.”

 

Adam’s nostrils flared.  “Then we’ll find him ourselves.”

 

“Adam, I don’t want to kill him.  That’s too good for him.  But we don’t have any authority to bring him back.”

 

“No, but Wasson does.”

 

“Wait just a minute,” said Hoss.  “Why didn’t Wasson go after him in the first place?”

 

“Because Roy thought it would be better if a Utah District Marshal went since Holman’s in Utah Territory,” said Micah.  “At least the government did.  They thought he’d get more respect.  I suspect Holman has everyone up there scared to death to cross him.”

 

Adam rubbed his jaw. “That’s why we get Marshal Wasson. With him being in the Nevada District, Holman’s got nothing to use to scare him off.”

 

Hoss stood and stuffed his hands in his pockets. “Roy ain’t gonna like you going to Wasson without talkin’ to him first.”

 

“It’s been too long already,” said Adam, scratching the back of his neck.  “Hoss, if you’re worried about Roy, I’ll ride in tomorrow and talk to him, but whether he agrees or not, I’m going to Carson City to see Wasson.”

 

“I’m riding with you,” said Micah.

 

Adam inhaled and narrowed his eyes.  “And just how are you going to do that?”

 

Looking over at Micah, Hoss smiled.  “Well, you see, Older Brother, that’s somethin’ we been workin’ on.  There ain’t nothin’ wrong with his backside.  He rides a horse just fine.  You just have to give him some help gettin’ up and down.”

 

Adam looked at Micah’s feet and raised his brows.  “Uh…how…” he said, pointing at Micah’s boots.

 

“Well, it ain’t easy, but I can get ’em on.  Annie knitted me some thick-footed socks.  I have two pair on over the bandages, and my boots are two sizes too big.”

 

All the men turned to look when they heard Shiloh and Annie coming down the stairs.

 

“I’ll come by tomorrow,” said Adam quietly.

 

Shiloh bent to kiss her brother’s head. “He’s asleep.  If you have some time tomorrow, I’ll bring him over to see you.”

 

“Maybe we should wait a few days.  It’s gonna take a little time to recover from this evening.”  When she furrowed her brow, he added, “I’ll be hurtin’ tomorrow, Little Sister.”  Micah took her hand and pulled her onto the arm of the chair as he looked over at Hoss and Annie whose faces were somber.

 

Shiloh’s lips trembled when she saw the look, though she already knew in her heart what he had to tell her.

 

“This is as good as it will ever get,” said Micah.

 

Bowing her head, she folded her lips and closed her eyes, squeezing Micah’s hand.

 

“Shy, you know it’s a miracle I didn’t die from infection.  The burn was down to bone. There’s just a thin layer of scarred skin left.  It’s not enough to for me to walk on without….”  When he saw a tear drop, he exhaled.  “We just have to make the best of it.”

 

Chapter Forty-Four

 

Adam came out of the washroom tying the sash of his robe and stopped to watch Shiloh brush her hair at her dressing table.  His eyes narrowed just a little and his lips turned in a slight smile.  She wasn’t wearing a flannel gown.  She did seem distracted, moving her brush down the length of her hair, and then stopping to stare into the mirror.

 

“Holman?”” she asked softly.

 

“Mm hm.”

 

“Is there no real law in Utah Territory?”  she asked.

 

“It depends on where you live and what religion you choose to follow.”

 

Slightly cocking her head, she shifted her eyes toward him.  “Is there nothing we can do?”

 

He moved behind her and bent to kiss her head. “Yes, there is.  I’m going to see Roy about it tomorrow, so there’s no point in worrying about it tonight.”  He kissed her head again, and lingered, looking at her in the mirror.

 

The furrow of her brows slowly relaxed as she looked at his clear, hazel eyes.  She knew he loved Micah the way he loved Hoss and Joe.  He would find a way within the law to bring Holman to justice.

 

Continuing on to the nursery, Adam pulled the little blanket over his son who was sleeping soundly.  When he came back into the bedroom, Shiloh could see his expression in the mirror, his face reminding her of a bull ready to charge, only there was no malice, but rather…something else.  As he moved swiftly toward her, she stood, and just as she turned, she grunted. He had stepped into her so quickly he’d almost knocked the breath out of her.

 

She had no time to think about breathing because he pressed his lips hard against hers as he held her tightly to him.  Her hands found their way to his shoulders where she pushed until he moved away, though only centimeters from her lips.

 

Studying her eyes for a moment, he relaxed his hold on her.  “I didn’t mean to startle you.  It’s just…I’ve missed you.”

 

With the strain on her face melting, she teased, “What was that last night…and the afternoon before that?”

 

“But a glimpse of what tonight will be,” he said softly as he walked her backwards to the bed where he untied their robes, threw them out of the way, and with one arm around her holding her to him, he crawled from the foot of the bed to their pillows.

 

By the time their quick breaths, moans and giggling had subsided, both felt as if everything they’d held in for the past three weeks was finally released.  Their eyelids were as heavy as their arms, and wherever their limbs lay once they were sated was where they stayed until Abel pronounced he was ready for his morning meal.

 

“Our son is calling,” said Adam sleepily, his mouth against her ear.

 

“You’re closer,” she mumbled.

 

“How d’you figure?”

 

“You have to get off me before I can get up.”  When he didn’t move, she added, “Which makes you closer.”

 

He groaned as he slowly rose up to his hands and knees, and with a playful smile, he kissed her mouth before he carefully maneuvered to the side of the bed.  Without bothering with his robe, he went into the nursery and emerged holding at arm’s length a baby who was laughing and squirming in anticipation of a meal.  Adam rushed past the bed to the washroom and soon brought Abel to the bed wrapped in a towel.

 

“I need to take a bath before I go downstairs,” said Shiloh, yawning.  After the yawn, she tiredly closed her eyes.  “Hopefully some milk will hold him until I can feed him breakfast.”

 

Swinging Abel through the air toward his mother, Adam laughed at Abel’s squeal.  “I have to shave, so why don’t you feed him while I heat the water and draw your bath?  Then you can both take a bath. He’s soaked.”

 

She had been allowing Abel to bounce as she cooed, but Adam’s pronouncement of his soggy condition made her grimace. “Would you bring me a diaper, Daddy?” she asked as she tickled Abel’s neck with her nose.

 

Abel’s response was a string of “baba um squeeee”.

 

Walking back to the nursery, Adam said over his shoulder, “Why bother?  You’re about to bathe him.”

 

“Because he’s wet, dear,” she said loudly.  “I do not want to hold a wet baby against me.  Besides, he’ll get a rash if I don’t get the wet diaper off of him.”

 

Returning with the diaper, Adam tossed it toward her as he continued on into the washroom, but stopped and went back when Abel reached toward him and said, “Da”.  It wasn’t the first time Adam had heard that, but it was certainly the clearest.  Sitting back down on the side of the bed, he watched as Shiloh peeled off the wet diaper, winced when she shoved it into his hands, and then laughed when she swiftly moved her hand over the source of the wetness to prevent continuing sprinkles from falling all over the bed, followed almost as quickly by the dry diaper.

 

Holding the diaper in place, she asked Adam with her eyes for another diaper.

 

***

 

Adam was at the breakfast table first and didn’t wait on Shiloh and Abel.  He was going to see Roy this morning, and then he would come back for Micah. Both men would be riding to Carson City to see the Marshal.  Pouring his coffee, he bounced his head.  He’d have to tell Shiloh what he was doing, but he’d wait until after he spoke to Roy.  If he and Micah ended up going with Wasson, he’d send word.  She wouldn’t be happy, but she’d have to accept it.  Holman’s arrest couldn’t wait any longer.

 

Shiloh stopped at the foot of the stairs and cocked her head at Adam’s saddlebags and bedroll situated on the entry table.

 

When he came out of the kitchen with two brown paper-wrapped packages, he stumbled to a stopped.  He hadn’t expected her to be down before he came back from saddling Sport.  Letting out a heavy breath, he set the wrapped food on the entry table next to his bedroll, then looked at her, his brows curved in apology at the disappointment on her face.  He held his hands out for the baby, and when she hesitated, he closed his eyes and nodded at the same time he reached for Abel. “Etta’s in the kitchen.  I’ll be right back.”

 

She gave the baby up and waited for him, and when he came back, he took her hand and guided her to the entry table where he threw his saddlebags over his shoulder, moved his bedroll under his arm, and passed her one of the packages.  With a hand placed gently on her back, he directed her out the front door and to the barn.

 

She watched silently as he laid his burden on a bale of hay along with the package she had been holding, then turned back to her and moved his arms around her.

 

“Say it,” he said patiently.

 

“I don’t know what to say,” she replied quietly. “You haven’t told me anything yet.”

 

He nodded and slightly smiled.  Only a few months ago she would have already lit into him. “After I talk to Roy, and depending on what he says, I’m riding to Carson City to speak with Marshal Wasson.  Micah is going with me.  One way or another Holman will be dealt with.”

 

She took a deep breath, but remained quiet.

 

“Say something.”

 

“There’s nothing to say, is there?  I suspect Micah would be trying to do this by himself.  I should be grateful you won’t let him go alone.” Adam narrowed his eyes and crooked his jaw to which she gave a weak smile.  “Adam, it was just a matter of time before the two of you did something.  I just wish it wasn’t so soon.  We just got home.”  She moved a hand to his face.  “What needs to be taken care of while you’re gone?”

 

He pulled her into a tight hug.  “We’ll be going over everything with Hank before we leave.  So unless Hank has any questions, the ranch work will be handled.  If we get something in the mail for Slater, you’ll need to decide if it can wait, and if you don’t think it can, contact Robert.”

 

She folded her lips, but managed a smile before she looked up at him.  “You need to say goodbye to your son before you go.”

 

Walking back to the house each with an arm around the other, they entered through the kitchen door.  Etta sat at the table feeding Abel the last of his breakfast.  She left the last bite in the bowl, wiped his chin, then passed him to his mother.

 

“Did you have a good breakfast?” she asked, smiling as she tenderly kissed his forehead.  “Say bye-bye to Daddy.”

 

Adam held Abel in front of him, taking in every feature of his face.  He was growing and changing so fast he wanted to make sure he recognized the changes when he returned.  He had no idea how long he would be gone. “Hey, Little Buddy.  Take care of your mama while I’m gone,” he said softly as he brought Abel against him and gently pressed his lips to the baby’s cheek.

 

Abel’s hands went to each side of his father’s face as he leaned into Adam with his mouth open, just touching Adam’s lips.  “Da,” he whispered as he patted Adam’s cheek.

 

With his eyes wide, Adam looked over Abel’s head at Shiloh whose hands were covering the wide grin on her face at Abel’s first attempt at a kiss. Laughing, Adam rubbed his nose on Abel’s neck which brought forth a squeal and a cackle.  “I have to go,” Adam said sadly as he passed Abel to his mother.

 

Abel, however, grunted angrily as he tried to push himself out of Shiloh’s arms, calling insistently for his ‘Da.’

 

Moving a finger to the tip of Abel’s nose, Adam furrowed his brow and said sternly, “No,” sending the baby into his first angry fit, grunting loudly, and trying to wriggle out of his mother’s arms.  “Abel, none of this,” Adam said just as severely, giving Abel’s leg a gentle swat.

 

Abel’s eyes squeezed shut as his face turned red and his mouth opened, only he was so incensed it took a moment for sound to emerge, and when it did, it was loud and furious.

 

“You’re leaving me with this?” said Shiloh, trying not to laugh.  It seemed funny to her that she had just witnessed Abel’s first kiss and his first temper tantrum, all directed at Adam, in the space of a minute.  “What do I do now?”

 

“Turn him away from you, carry him on your hip, and go about your business,” Adam answered, smiling.  “He’ll eventually learn pitching a fit will get him nowhere.”

 

Once Abel was parked on her hip, the sound level increased.  Closing her eyes, Shiloh frowned.

 

Adam took her chin in his hand.  “Don’t you give in.  He has to learn.”  Raising his brows, he pressed his lips together as he looked at her, and didn’t let go of her chin until she nodded.  “You have to get used to this.  He’s going to keep trying, and we have to outlast him.”

 

“How do you know that?  Do you have another child I don’t know about?”

 

“Oh, you know all about him.  His name is Joe.”  Leaning in, but away from Abel’s kicking, he kissed her.  “I learned from Marie.  Now, I have to go.”

 

When he turned to leave, she caught his hand, and gave him a worried look.  “Please be careful.”

 

Moving his hands to her face, he looked into her eyes, and before he kissed her one last time, he said, “I’ll be back…with Micah.  Count on it.”

 

Abel kicked and caught Adam in his side.  Grabbing the little foot, Adam kissed it and playfully bit a toe, catching Abel off guard.  The baby laughed, but stopped and furrowed his brow before he continued his fit, though with less conviction.

 

Chapter Forty-Five

 

“Now Adam, I’ve already spoken to Wasson, and we both agreed we can’t send anyone short of any army to fetch Holman,” said Roy as he leaned forward over his desk.  Most times that was enough to settle this particular Cartwright down, but Adam’s eyes glared while his lips were drawn in an angry line.

 

“So where’s this army?” Adam blurted loudly.

 

Sitting down hard in his chair, Roy tossed his glasses on his desk.  “There isn’t one, at least not yet.  Too many men know how the other two Marshals came back.  Holman’s got ’em all scared to death.”

 

“And what exactly does that mean?”

 

Roy turned away, bristling for a moment, then calmed himself.  “That means, Adam, that no one’s gone back for Holman.  There’s a warrant for his arrest, and for the time being, that’s all there is.”

 

Spinning on his heel as he moved his hat to his head, Adam walked toward the door, but stopped when Roy called to him.  “Now Adam, don’t you go gettin’ any ideas in that thick skull of yours about going after Holman.”

 

Adam hadn’t turned back to face Roy, but did now. “Roy, Holman’s not gonna get away with this.”

 

“And just what d’you think you’re gonna do?” Roy asked, almost yelling. “I oughta lock you in a cell for your own protection.”

 

“I’m going to Carson City to light a fire under Warren Wasson.”  With that, Adam walked out the door.

 

Roy shook his head and mumbled as he retrieved his glasses and hat.  He walked out the door, looked around his town, and then promptly headed for the telegraph office.

 

Back at the Flying W, Micah sat in the kitchen patiently sipping coffee.  He’d already had a conversation with Roy and knew how Adam’s would turn out.  But he’d let his brother-in-law do what he felt he needed to do.  Besides, a worked-up Adam Cartwright would be less likely to take ‘no’ for an answer when they approached Wasson.  And it gave him time to pack his saddle bags without help he didn’t want or need.  He heard a horse gallop into the yard and smiled.  In another minute, Adam was pouring himself a cup of coffee and joining him at the table.

 

For a moment neither man said a word.  “You ready?” asked Adam.  When Micah nodded, Adam took another sip of his coffee.  “Why didn’t you tell me you’d already gone to Roy?”

 

Micah shrugged.  “You’da gone anyway.”

 

Twisting his mouth, Adam nodded.  “You talk to Hank?”

 

“Yep.  He knows what to do while we’re gone, and he’ll ride over to your place and let Shy know.  Only thing left to do is leave.”

 

Adam stood and took both coffee cups and the coffee pot to the basin and rinsed them.  Turning back to Micah, he asked, “How do we get you up on your horse?”

 

As he struggled to his feet, Micah replied in a strained voice, “Gettin’ up’s the easy part.  It’s gettin’ down that’s hard.  It either hurts like hell or is embarrassing as the dickens.  Either way, it’s good that nothin’ much bothers Beau.  He pretty much stands there and takes it.”

 

With Micah maneuvered into his saddle with the help of a rope tied around Adam’s saddle horn, the two men left.  When they arrived in Carson City two hours later, they found Marshal Wasson sitting on the front porch of his office, waiting for them.

 

Adam dismounted, tied his horse, and before he walked over to Micah’s horse, he stopped in front of the Marshal.  “Don’t tell me.  Sheriff Coffee sent you a telegram.”

 

Wasson merely nodded his head.

 

“You need to see this before you make up your mind,” said Adam.  Continuing on to stand next to Micah’s horse, he looked up.  “How do you want to do this?”

 

Swinging his leg over the saddle horn, Micah answered, “I’m sliding down.  You think you can catch me before I land?”

 

Adam nodded and braced himself, and when Micah slid down, Adam was positioned so that Micah slid into his chest. Wrapping his arms tightly around Micah the instant he was vertical, Adam stopped his fall with his feet inches above the ground.  He eased Micah the rest of the way down.  “Hold on to the stirrup while I get the crutches.”

 

Wasson sat watching as Adam gently lowered Micah to his feet.  He watched the color drain from Micah’s face indicative of extreme pain…the kind of pain he had seen only once in his life.  He watched Micah’s hands shake as he held onto the stirrup of his saddle, and again when he reached for the crutches.

 

While Micah made his way to the boardwalk, Adam opened his saddlebags and pulled out a bottle.

 

Standing, Wasson opened the door to his office and stepped aside as Micah and Adam slowly walked in, closing the door behind him. He motioned to two chairs on the front side of his desk, then brought three cups and a coffee pot over and sat down himself.  “Do I need to send for the doctor, son?” he asked as he poured the coffee.

 

“No sir.  I have the only thing I need right here.”  With that said, Micah pulled the cork out of the bottle of Laudanum, downed two gulps and followed them with coffee.   He winced hard as he set the coffee cup back down on the desk.

 

“Mr. Whitney, ordinarily I’d tell a man in your condition to go home.”  Wasson leaned his chair backwards on the back two legs and propped his feet on his desk, then calmly sipped his coffee.  “You were an honest range detective, and what you did to Holman and his partner was the right thing to do.  But Holman’s been holding this grudge against you for a long time now, and he’s built himself up quite a number of men.”

 

Adam and Micah sat patiently listening.  “Roy mentioned an army,” said Adam.

 

“The U.S. Army says they don’t have the men to spare at the moment.”  Wasson scowled.  “War and all.”  He took another sip of his coffee.  “That means we need an army of our own, and right now, with two dead Marshals, I’m short on volunteers.”

 

Micah’s eyes were fluttering, but he opened them wide then Adam touched his arm.

 

“How short?” asked Adam.

 

Wasson just shook his head.

 

“I can have thirty men here by tomorrow.  More if you need them.”

 

It appeared that Wasson didn’t do anything quickly.  He slowly raised his eyes to Adam’s as if he was calling a bluff.  “And just where do you think you’ll find thirty men willing, considering what Holman’s already done?”

 

“They’ll come from the Ponderosa and the Flying W ranches.  Most of our hands have been with us a long time, Marshal.  They’re loyal men, and they’ve seen us through bad times, even as bad as this one.”

 

Nodding, Wasson let his chair fall back down to the floor and looked at Micah.

 

“Don’t even try,” said Micah.

 

“Now why would I try to talk anyone as bull-headed as Mort Williams out of anything.”  A slow smile formed on Wasson’s face.  “You look like hell, Micah.  Come on back to one of the cells and let the Laudanum do its job while your friend here gathers his army.”  He waited for Micah to get to his feet, and without arguing, he followed Wasson to the back room.  “Oh, and Mr. Cartwright,” Wasson called from the back.  “It would be better if you could come up with forty men.”

 

Adam waited to leave until he heard the squeak of a cot.  He lifted his hat off the desk, and left for the telegraph office.

 

***

 

Ben was sitting at his desk when he heard shouting first, and then the hoof beats of a horse coming into the yard fast.

 

“Mr. Cartwright!  Mr. Cartwright!”  The lad was at the front door by the time Ben opened it.  “Mr. Cartwright!  This telegram came in urgent!”

 

Ben grabbed the envelope and tore it open, his eyes moving back and forth across the handwritten page.  By now, Annie was running down the stairs, and Joe and Hoss were running into the house from the barn.

 

“What is it, Pa?” asked Hoss.

 

“It’s…it’s a telegram from Adam.  It seems no one wants to do anything about Holman.  Wasson says he’ll go if we can send forty men with him to Utah Territory to arrest him.”

 

“Forty men?  That’s gonna bring things to a standstill here,” said Joe.”

 

“Not if we take twenty from the Ponderosa and twenty from the Flying W,” said Ben determinedly.

 

“Hoss, ride out to the Flying W and talk to Hank.  Tell him to send twenty of his best gunmen here as quick as he can. Make sure he sends those two guards Adam took with him to San Francisco.  Joe, you ride up to the camps first.  Bring back Sulley, Butch, Emmet, Dutch and Levi.  They know how to use their guns better than any of the others up there.  Then go pull the another ten off the herd.”

 

“What about the other five?” asked Joe.

 

Ben smiled. “Three, Joseph.  Two of us are going.  One will stay behind and take care of the ranch.”  Raising his brow, he answered the question on Joe’s face.  “I don’t know yet. But don’t you worry about the other three.  I’ll take care of that.”  Turning to Annie, he said, “I’ll leave Shiloh to you.”

 

“What am I supposed to tell her?”

 

Ben turned toward the bureau, taking his gun belt and swinging it around his hips.  “She knew where they were going.  Tell her the truth.”

 

She gave him a furious glare.  “It would help if I knew the truth.”

 

After buckling his gun belt and tying the holster down, Ben moved his hat to his head.  “The truth,” he said calmly, moving his hands to Annie’s arms, “is that Wasson has agreed to go after Holman with help.  And we’re the help.”

 

When Ben reached town, he rode straight to the Silver Dollar Saloon.  Before he stepped in, he looked first one way, and then the other down the boardwalk, then pushed through the batwing doors.  Scanning the room, he spotted the man he was looking for and strode over.

 

The man sitting at the table took his cigar out of his mouth and smiled.  “I knew there’d come a day when you’d need me.”

 

A wry smile took over Ben’s face.  “Barney, we’ve had our differences and disagreements.  But this has nothing to do with business.”

 

Nodding to a chair, Barney Fuller extinguished his cigar.  “Which one?”

 

“Two,” said Ben, sitting down. “Adam.  And Micah Whitney.”

 

Barney poured two glasses of whiskey.  “Micah Whitney isn’t your son.  He’s Amos’ son.  Too bad about Amos.  He raised some fine horses.”

 

“His daughter does, too,” said Ben.

 

“She’s a woman, Ben.  She’ll never be able to produce the kind of stock Amos did.”

“Barney, you’ve been sitting in this saloon much too long.  You should ride out to the Ponderosa and take a look at her stable.  Amos had a good eye, and patience, but he didn’t have her determination.  She’s outdone her father.”

 

Barney’s brows rose as he smiled.  “If that had come from any other man, I’d say you’d finally lost your edge.”   He downed his whiskey.  “Based on the fact that you’re here calling in a favor, can I assume Adam and Micah have gone after Holman?”

 

“They have,” said Ben.  “But they’re doing it within the law.  Marshal Wasson agreed if Adam could come up with help.  And he’s going to need some competent help, if you know what I mean.”

 

Barney’s smile disappeared as he sat up straight.  “My best three are here in town.  They can ride out with you.  But ah…you should probably warn Adam.  He’s and his brothers have tangled with them on several occasions before.  I’m not sure he’ll appreciate the help.”

 

Standing, Ben held out his hand.  “Barney, at this point, I think he’ll take whatever help he can get.  Just make sure your men understand this is to be done legally, and they’ll take orders from Wasson.  Holman will be brought in to face a judge, not to dangle from the end of a rope.  Unless, of course, it’s the decision of a judge,” Ben finished, smiling and offering his hand.

 

Barney shook it, and walked Ben out of the saloon.  “Wait here.  I’ll send them over.”

 

Chapter Forty-Six

 

Three men sat at a dark campsite illuminated only by a small fire.  There was no conversation, only a sudden deep sigh or an occasional crackle when one of them stoked the fire.  It was well past eight in the evening, yet they waited in the dark, their horses saddled and ready to ride.

 

When each heard the distant pounding of what sounded like a stampede, two men rose, poured coffee over the fire and put away the few items of comfort they had removed from their saddlebags.

 

Before the stampede was upon them, one man was already in his saddle, his horse nervously dancing with the instinct to run, but wouldn’t until his master gave him the reins.

 

The riders came in fast, but the leader held up a hand and brought them to a stop.  He was at the agreed upon site, but he could see nothing in the darkness.

 

“Adam?” he called in a deep, confident, but quiet voice.

 

Stepping from the shadows into the moonlight, Adam smiled.  “We thought you’d never get here.”  He looked behind his father at the mounted men behind him.  “Looks like you were able to spare enough men. How many?”

 

“You asked for forty.”

 

Adam could see the man beside his father was Hoss based on his size and the roundness of his hat.  “Where’s Joe?”

 

“Well, someone had to stay and run the ranch.”  Though Adam couldn’t see his father’s face, he could hear his smile.

 

“Shiloh?”

 

“Annie heard the whole thing. She’ll tell Shiloh what’s happening.”

 

A second man walked forward with his rifle resting across his arms.  “Mr. Cartwright.”

 

Ben nodded.  “Marshal.”

 

“I have to admit. I wasn’t counting on a telegram bringing forth an army,” said Wasson.

 

Leaning forward and resting his arms on his saddle horn, Ben looked Wasson in the eye.  “When one of my sons sends for help, he knows he’ll get it.”

 

Wasson glanced at Adam and nodded.  “If you don’t mind, I’d like to speak to your men before we head out.”

 

Ben shifted in his saddle. “For the foreseeable future, they’re your men, Wasson.  You speak to them how and when you see fit.  But I will tell you, they all know where they’re going and why.”

 

Walking to the center of the crowd of horses, Wasson raised his voice even though he’d made an effort to be inconspicuous and quiet before the Cartwright’s men arrived.  Holman had his spies and could very well have someone in Carson City and Virginia City in his pocket.  But Wasson couldn’t hide forty men heading into Utah Territory, so there was no point trying any longer.

 

“We will be bringing Holman back to stand trial.  That, gentlemen is a statement of fact.  If you have other ideas, you need to go back home now.  We will not start any shooting.  If Holman decides he doesn’t like the odds, he will have the option of turning himself in peacefully.  If he decides he doesn’t want to, you will most likely be involved in a small war.  He will have men around him to defend him.  If you are fired upon, you may shoot back.”  He looked out at the figures in the dark.  “Whatever you do, do not shoot Holman.  Mr. Whitney would like the favor of seeing him rot in prison.”

 

Walking back to where Adam, now mounted, waited with Ben and Micah, Wasson continued, “If we have to split up, fourteen men will follow me, Adam Cartwright and Ben Cartwright.  Make sure you know who you’re with before we ride.” The men shifted into three distinct groups waiting for whichever of the three leaders motioned them to follow. “Keep your eyes open.  If Holman doesn’t already know we’re on the way, we won’t get far into Utah Territory before he does.  You can bet he’ll be waiting for us in the best possible place for him…and the worst possible place for us.  So we will be avoiding blind passes even if it means we take the long way around.  Any questions?”

 

“Marshal, these men were handpicked,” said Ben.  They all know what we’re up against.  Their questions have already been answered.”

 

“Let’s ride then.  The quicker we get this done, the quicker you can all go back home.” Taking the reins of his horse from Adam, Wasson mounted.  He rode through the middle of the gathered men with Ben, Adam and Micah following, and when he was past the last of them, he nudged his horse into a trot, listening as his army fell in behind.

 

***

 

Annie rarely knocked on the door when she knew Shiloh was alone at the house.  She pushed the front door open and stepped in.  “Shiloh?  Where are you?”

 

“I’m in here,” she said loudly from the office.

 

“Well, that’s a surprise,” Annie said quietly as she stepped into the office and took a seat in the chair opposite Shiloh.

 

“You’re too late.  Hank brought me the ledgers and supply lists for the Flying W this morning.”

 

“So you know Adam and Micah went to Carson City?”

 

Shiloh nodded as she checked the figures in the ledger.

 

Annie watched Shiloh closely. “Did you know Adam sent a telegram to your father asking for forty men?”

 

Shiloh’s head popped up.  “No,” she answered softly as she laid the pencil down and closed the ledger.  “What did Pa do?”

 

Annie scoffed.  “What do you think he did?”

 

Shiloh snorted knowingly.  “Did he manage forty?”

 

“Twenty from the Flying W and twenty from the Ponderosa…sort of.  He rode into town to talk to someone…Barney somebody.”

 

Laughing, Shiloh said, “Barney Fuller.  He has some professional gunmen on his payroll.”

 

“Oh, as if Adam doesn’t.  Hoss brought back two men Adam uses as guards.”

 

Nodding, Shiloh said, “Mark and Keith.  They guard the mine.  When they aren’t guarding the mine, they’re guarding Abel and me.”

 

With a puzzled curl of her brows, Annie said, “You don’t seem…worried.”

 

Shiloh leaned back hard in the desk chair and sighed.  “I’m worried.  But at some point, Micah was going to go after Holman if the law couldn’t get him, and Adam wasn’t going to let him go alone.”  Standing she walked around the desk and asked for Annie’s hand.  “This actually makes it a little better.  They have help.”

 

Taking Shiloh’s hand, Annie stood.  Both women left the office together toward the kitchen.  “Shiloh, Pa and Hoss went with them.”

 

Shiloh stopped and took both of Annie’s hands.  “Are you worried?”  Annie nodded.  “You wouldn’t be human if you weren’t.  Come on.  Let’s get some coffee.”

 

“I just don’t know why it had to be Hoss,” said Annie as they sat down at the kitchen table with the coffee pot and cups.  “He would have been much better at keeping up with the ranch than Joe.”

 

Looking across the room as memories flooded her mind, Shiloh smiled.  “When Adam went off to college, Hoss was…oh…eleven or twelve.  On the verge of becoming a man.  Micah spent time with Hoss teaching him what Adam would have if he’d been here.”

 

“How old was Joe?”

 

“He was six.  Too young to be following Micah around.  And I was nine and a girl.  I wasn’t always allowed.  Besides all that, Hoss is big enough to carry Micah around if necessary.  Joe isn’t.”

 

“Hello?  Anyone home?”

 

Shiloh shouted.  “In the kitchen!”

 

Joe went right to a chair at the kitchen table and sat down.   Under his arm, he carried the Ponderosa ledger. “Shiloh, with Pa and Hoss both gone, I’m gonna be riding all over the ranch.  I have to go up to the timber camps and make sure everything’s all right there.  I have to ride out to the herd.  I have horses to break, stalls to keep clean….”

 

“Joe,” she said, holding her hand out for the ledger.

 

The smile on his face was that of a relieved boy.  “I was never real good at keeping the ledger up.  I hate adding all those columns.”

 

“I don’t think they’re going to be gone too long, Joe,” said Shiloh.  “Here, have some coffee,” she said, pushing a cup in front of him.

 

Pouring his coffee, he said, “Pa left the bill from the last supply run.”  He flipped the front of the book open and shuffled through loose papers in the front.  “And these payments need to be added for the right contracts and deposited.  And if they’re not back by the end of the week, there’s payroll.”

 

Shiloh snapped the ledger shut.  “I’ll take care of it.  I have to go into town and check the mail today anyway.  Adam didn’t tell me if he was expecting anything for Slater, so I need to check.”

 

“I overheard Hoss and Pa talking.  They said bringing Holman back wasn’t going to be easy.”  When Annie got no response, she asked, “What now?”

 

Folding her lips in a line, Shiloh half shrugged.   “We go about our day as normal as possible. And we pray…often.”

 

Annie and Joe left together, heading back to the Ponderosa.  “She’s taking this well,” said Annie.

 

Joe furrowed his brows.  “She looked all right.”

 

Sitting at the kitchen table, Shiloh lowered her face into her hands the minute she heard the front door close.

 

Etta stepped into the kitchen quietly and stopped when she saw Shiloh at the kitchen table.  She started to leave, but then turned back.  “I know there’s nothing I can do about Mr. Cartwright or about how you feel, but is there something else I can do for you?”

 

Sniffing and wiping her face, she looked up at Etta.  “Yes, there is.  Help me stay busy.”

 

Moving to the table, Etta poured herself a cup of coffee.  “I did want to speak to you about something…Rachel…and school.  School will start soon, and though she’s still a little young, I think she’s ready to go.”

 

“Etta, were you ever able to help your husband in a classroom before you left home to come west?”

 

“No.  I was still studying.  Of course, he was teaching me.  But no, I’ve never worked in a classroom.”

 

Shiloh smiled and wrapped her hands around her coffee cup.  “School out here is different than school back east.  These kids are generally good kids, but they can be…cruel, especially to the young ones who don’t know the others are kidding.  I think she’s still too young.”

 

Etta nodded and looked away.

 

“She’s only five,” said Shiloh with an understanding smile.  “I think another year will do her good, especially if we can find some children her age to play with…children who will be going to school with her.”

 

Glancing up at Shiloh, Etta said, “I hadn’t thought about finding her someone to play with.”

 

Shiloh reached out and covered Etta’s hand.  “We can start her here…get her used to a schedule similar to what she’ll be expected to follow at school and start her on her first year lessons.”

 

Etta smiled.  “Well, I suppose that will keep both of us busy.  I have some lesson plans and some books in my trunk upstairs.  When you have time, would you mind going over them with me?”

 

“Of course not.  When Adam gets back, he should look, too.  He taught school in Virginia City for awhile.”

 

“My goodness, when did he have the time?”

 

“It was a while ago…just after he came home from college.  In fact, I was one of his students for little while.”

 

Etta straightened.  “How…”

 

Holding up her hand, Shiloh said, “Short version is he sent me home because I was beyond what the school here could teach me.  I thought he sent me home because I was a…well, let’s just say I wasn’t an easy child.  But he brought me books to continue to study, and eventually, he arranged for my college education.”

 

“And then he married you?”

 

“Well, no.  I was gone a long time, and then my father died.  That’s why I came back.  And after that, I hated Adam…because I thought he let my brother die. But I was wrong…well, I wasn’t wrong, but…” she shook her head.  “It’s complicated.”

 

Etta’s face was twisted in confusion. “Your brother’s not dead.”

 

Shiloh smiled.  “No, he’s not.  But I was nine when we buried him, and that’s when everything changed.  We didn’t find out he was still alive until after Adam and I were married.”  Rubbing her forehead at the unpleasant memories, Shiloh said, “Anyway, I told you it was a long, complicated story.”  She sat up and breathed deeply.  “I think I know where we might find some children for Rachel to play with.  Annie sometimes sees women who bring their children with them.  She keeps getting interrupted so the mother can take care of whatever the children have gotten into.  But if we were to invite them here to play while Annie is with their mothers, we’ll be helping Annie, and we’ll get Rachel accustomed to being around other children.”

 

Rachel ran into the kitchen.  “Baby Abel crying.”

 

Abel had cried himself to sleep.  Shiloh was anxious to see if he would remember he was upset, so she pushed herself up from the table.  “Baby Abel is crying,” she said as she lifted Rachel’s face to hers. Looking back at Etta, she said, “We might as well start now,” then continued out of the kitchen.  “This should be interesting,” she said as she turned the corner.

 

Shiloh quietly peeked into the nursery to see Abel sitting up in his bed with his bottom lip quivering as he looked around.

 

When he saw her, he reached out, his little fingers grabbing at the air.  “Mamamama,” he said after which he moved his fingers to his mouth and softly cried.

 

Hurrying to him, Shiloh lifted him out of the bed and pressed him against her as she kissed his head.  “Mama’s here sweet boy.”

 

Chapter Forty-Seven

 

The men had ridden twenty miles with only a few stops to allow the horses to rest.  When Adam slowed down, so did most of the other men. Wasson had been watching Adam Cartwright.  Beyond the escalating unrest of the horses, he seemed preoccupied.  Riding up along beside him, Wasson said, “Wherever you are, leave it.  You need to be here.”

 

“We need to stop and let the horses rest longer than five minutes.  If we don’t, half of the men could be walking.”

 

Wasson grunted. “I’m not talking about the horses.”

 

Adam snorted as one side of his mouth curled into a smile.  “I’m the least of your worries.”

 

“Actually, you’re my best chance.”

 

Twisting his mouth, Adam asked, “You wanna explain that?”

 

“I knew Micah as Mort Williams.  I was one of the Marshals in Utah Territory when he was a range detective, and Mort always brought his rustlers in.  He didn’t kill them on the spot like the others.  He was honest.  He was fierce.  And he’s got his mind on one thing.”

 

Adam looked ahead of him right at Micah’s back.  “And what would that be?”

 

“How he can get some time alone with Holman to make him suffer before he kills him.  Mort Williams can be a dangerous man when he’s been crossed.”

 

“We’re not talking about the same man,” said Adam as he continued to look ahead.  “I’ve known Micah for twenty years. I’ve never known him to be dangerous.”

 

“You never knew him as Mort Williams,” said Wasson. “Look, I have no doubt Micah Whitney is as upstanding as they come.  But in Utah Territory, he will become Mort Williams without even trying.  Too many people know him.   What I need you to do is keep him on a short leash or, at least, don’t let him out of your sight.  Because if he kills Holman, he’s the man I’ll be taking in to stand trial.”

 

“Well, Marshal,” answered Adam as he cocked his head and looked at Wasson square in the eye.  “We’re not in any danger of that.  Micah wants Holman to rot in prison.  Remember?”

 

“Micah maybe.  Not Mort.”  Watching as Adam took a deep, agitated breath, Wasson added, “Just keep your eyes on him. If nothing happens, no harm done.” He rode ahead of the men and held up an arm.  “We’ll stop here to rest the horses.”

 

Adam hung behind everyone.  He watched Hoss help Micah down off his horse and settle him against a tree.  As he stepped down out of his saddle, he watched Micah push his hat down over his face.  Had he been wrong all this time?  When Micah came back, he’d confessed who he’d been and what he’d done.  Adam knew of Mort Williams’ reputation.  That knowledge had made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up then, but since, Micah had become his best friend again…like one of his brothers…his partner.  How could he feel so unsure that Wasson was wrong?

 

“Hey Adam?” called Hoss.  “You gonna stand there or come over here and take a load off?”

 

Puckering his mouth, Adam bounced his head side to side and walked over.

 

***

 

Shiloh sat in the rocking chair Adam had given her before Abel was born.  She watched Abel sleep as she gently rocked in the chair.  “Do you know where your father is?” she whispered.  “He’s off finding justice for your uncle.”  Looking out the window, she said to herself, “Or maybe he’s off trying to save your uncle…from himself.”

 

She stood and laid Abel in his bed, carefully covering him, then went back downstairs to take another try at the ledger.  She’d sat at the desk for hours earlier in the day and had gotten nowhere, her mind always drifting back to Adam, Micah and Hoss, and what they might be riding into. She let her head fall back, thinking, “Why is this day dragging on and on?”  Bowing her head into her hand, she whispered,  “Adam, come home.”

 

“Shiloh?”

 

Without looking, Shiloh replied quietly, “I’m in here.”

 

“Shiloh!”

 

“In here,” she yelled, raising her head but keeping her eyes closed.

 

Annie walked into the office and studied Shiloh.  “You look like you haven’t slept.”

 

Shiloh scowled at her.  “Have you?”

 

Sinking into a chair, Annie answered begrudgingly, “No,”  then took a deep breath.  “I miss his…presence.”

 

Shiloh cocked her head.

 

“All right.  I’m worried.  Really…worried,” said Annie more quietly than she’d begun.

 

Looking back down at the ledger, Shiloh started writing.  “They have forty men with them.  They’ll be all right.”

 

Annie raised her brows as she twisted her mouth and looked at Shiloh.

 

Closing her eyes, Shiloh laid the pencil back down. “They have to be.”

 

Together they uttered quietly, “I can’t live without him.”

 

***

 

The men had eaten nothing but jerky between the time they left the outskirts of Carson City and now when Wasson held his hand up, stopping the large posse.  He needed them to relax at the end of each day.  If they didn’t, they’d be wound tighter than twine around a keg of gun powder and just about as explosive by the time they reached their destination, Fountain Green, the town closest to Randall Holman’s ranch. Faced with three more long days of riding ahead of them, Wasson knew they needed a decent meal and just enough whiskey to make them forget they were sleeping on hard ground instead of warm beds. He’d let Hoss and Adam catch the main course, two of the men with the pack horses would prepare the fixins, and he’d be the bartender, a matter of which there’d be no discussion.

 

“Where’dya think we’re gonna find enough meat to feed all them men?” asked Hoss as he and Adam rode back the way they’d come, their rifles on the ready.

 

“There’s a spring back here.”  Adam waved his hand to the left.  “Off that way on the edge of the trees.  I’m betting deer will be coming down to drink before they bed down for the night.”

 

With the spring in sight, both men dismounted and ground tied their horses, then bent low as they quietly made their to a good vantage point near the water. It wasn’t long before a doe led two fawns out of the woods down to the water. When Adam started to raise his rifle, Hoss put a hand on the barrel and shook his head.

 

Adam wagged his head. “Hoss, I know she has fawns, but their spots are almost completely faded, and we need to feed those men.” He smirked. “Unless you’re thinking we’re gonna trap twenty rabbits.”

 

“No, Older Brother, that ain’t it,” Hoss said without taking his eyes off the doe.  “That doe is pretty scrawny.  We’ll need two that size.  I’m thinkin’ after she moves on, a buck’ll come in, and he’ll be big enough to feed ’em all.  Besides, whatever’s out in these woods’ll scatter with the first shot, and we ain’t gonna catch nothin’ around here after that.”

 

Pushing his bottom lip up, Adam shrugged and got comfortable on his belly and elbows with his rifle ready.

 

The lookouts in camp jumped into the darkness around the camp when they heard the thud of horse hoofs on the ground.  As Adam and Hoss rode into the light of the lanterns and campfires everyone let out the breath each was holding, and soon smiled at the sight of the carcass tossed over the saddle in front of Adam.

 

Hoss dismounted, handed his reins to a man who was happy to take them, and pulled the buck down off Adam’s saddle.  “I hope you fellas built a good-sized spit.  And if ya didn’t, get to it.  I’ll have some venison ready to roast pretty quick.”

 

A man from the Flying W took Adam’s horse and brought the saddle back after tying Sport to the picket.  “Thanks for dinner, Mr. Cartwright,” the man said as he passed Adam’s saddle to him.

 

Adam smiled.  “Any coffee?”

 

“Yessir.  Whiskey, too,” the man said, smiling and pointing over to Wasson.

 

Adam let his saddle slide to the ground next to Micah. “Long ride today.  How are you?” he asked as he eased down to the ground.

 

Holding up his coffee cup, Micah winked.  “Can’t complain.  Wasson has been particularly generous with his whiskey.”

 

Tightening his lips together, Adam nodded.  “You just make sure you eat good tonight or we might just have to tie you to your saddle tomorrow.”

 

As Micah looked forward into the light of the closest fire, his face transformed into something Adam had never seen, a look that was as cold and hard as iron.  When Micah spoke, his voice was just as icy.  “Don’t worry, Adam, ol’ boy.  I’ll be as steady as ever when we ride into Fountain Green.”

 

Taking a deep breath, Adam looked over a Micah.  “Micah,” he said as he took another breath.  “We are bringing Holman back to stand trial.”

 

“Sure we are, Adam.  Sure.”

 

Wasson and Adam were among the four who took the first watch once everyone was bedded down, their bellies full, and their brains numbed by Wasson’s whiskey.  Wasson circled the camp, approaching Adam from the front to ensure he wouldn’t get shot.

 

“You didn’t even stiffen up with all the noise I made,” said Wasson as he stepped out of the darkness of the trees.

 

Adam puckered his lips and nodded.  “You made more noise than a man who wanted to get a jump on me would have.”

 

“I see you take after your father.”

 

“Oh,” said Adam with a crooked smile.  “In what way?”

 

“It takes a lot of ruffle your father’s feathers.  You seem to be the same way.  I can imagine, however, that when you’ve had enough the man on the receiving end is wishing he’d never pushed you.”  Wasson’s teeth shone in the moonlight when he smiled back.  “Just like your old man.”

 

Adam said nothing, but rather folded his arms around his rifle.

 

“You’ve been quiet this evening,” said Wasson.  “What’s on your mind?”

 

Adam looked out into the darkness. “Same thing that’s on yours.  Getting out of this without Micah being hauled in for murder.”

 

“What changed your mind?” asked Wasson as he followed Adam’s gaze.

 

“Something he said tonight,” said Adam, bowing his head.  “It didn’t sound like him.”

 

Over the next two days, Adam watched Micah slowly slip away, becoming more and more solitary.  Even when Adam made an effort to engage him, Micah would either smile or shrug and move his hat down low over his eyes without responding.

 

On the third day, roughly fifty miles from Holman’s ranch, he stopped worrying about Micah and concentrated on keeping his own head out of the way of the bullets that frequently and consistently whizzed by.

 

***

 

Each morning Shiloh gathered everything Abel would need away from home, and she, Etta and Rachel took the buggy to town to pick up the mail.  Early in the week, they had stopped by the Virginia City school to get the teacher’s recommendations for how to start Rachel.  Now for several days, Rachel spent several hours each day learning numbers and the alphabet.  This morning they went by the main house to convince Annie to join them, and  after picking up the mail, continued on to the International House for lunch.

 

Placing the mail on the table next to her, Shiloh sighed.  “I had hoped to hear something from Adam.”

 

Annie laid her own stack of mail down.  “Shiloh, you know there are only small settlements between us and Salt Lake City.”

 

Shiloh nodded and closed her eyes.  “I know.”  She said it again under her breath.  “I know.”

 

“Well, maybe that’s good,” said Etta.  The other two women snapped their heads up to look at her.  “If something had happened to them, you would have heard something from the law.”

 

“Ever the optimist, aren’t you?” said Shiloh, smiling and patting Etta’s hand.

 

They leaned back in their seats out of the way of the server delivering their food to the table.  Shiloh held Abel while Etta fussed over Rachel’s manners and Annie pushed her food around.

 

“Aren’t you hungry,” asked Shiloh.

 

“I haven’t been able to eat much without losing it lately,” said Annie timidly as she bowed her head, then moved her eyes up to Shiloh’s.

 

“You are, aren’t you?” replied Shiloh excitedly.

 

“I thought if we have time, I could go by Dr. Martin’s today and ask him to confirm it.  Would that be all right?”

 

Shiloh laughed and looked at Etta. “Does she really think she needs to ask?”

 

Giggling, Etta shook her head.

 

“Joe told me he saw you riding Cotton.  She’s trained already?” asked Annie.

 

Before Shiloh could answer, Sheriff Coffee appeared next to their table seemingly out of nowhere.

 

“Mrs. Cartwright,” he said nodding to Shiloh.  “Mrs. Cartwright,” he said, nodding again to Annie.  “Mrs. Wright,” he finished, tipping his hat to Etta.

 

“Sheriff Coffee,” said Shiloh, her smile fading.  “Have you heard something from Adam?”

 

Clasping his hands in front of him, Roy looked down at them, then looked Shiloh in the eye.  “No, haven’t heard a word from Adam. But I do need to talk to you.  Would you come by the office after you ladies finish your lunch?”

 

Shiloh took a deep breath.  “I can come now, Roy.”

 

“No need,” answered Roy.  “After lunch is fine.  Now, ladies, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll just finish my rounds.”  He tipped his hat again and left the dining room.

 

“What do you suppose that’s about?” asked Annie.

 

Shiloh continued to look in the direction of Roy’s departure.  “I don’t know, but something’s not right.”

 

“How do you know?” asked Etta.

 

Shiloh and Annie exchanged a nervous look. “If everything was really all right, he’d have just told me what he needed to tell me.”

 

Chapter Forty-Eight

 

Adam took aim at a point just above the left side of a boulder and waited patiently for the head of the man who been volleying bullets his way to pop back up.  The man was but one of a group that was shooting at them, but by Adam’s estimation, the posse far outnumbered them.  Perhaps Holman was willing to sacrifice a few to find out exactly what he was up against.

 

He looked away when he heard Wasson call out.  “Adam, you all right?” he yelled motioning to Adam’s leg.

 

Smiling, Adam shouted back.  “Just a scratch.  Do you know where Micah ended up?”

 

“He’s up above you in the rocks.”  Wasson scrambled over next to Adam.

 

As both men looked up, Adam asked, “How’d he get up there?”

 

“He rode his horse right next to the ledge and pulled himself up.  I guess a man’s arms get pretty strong when his feet don’t hold him anymore.”  Wasson steadied his rifle and looked ahead of them.  “How many?”

 

Adam trained his eyes back on his quarry.  “I count about fifteen, give or take a few.  No more than twenty.”

 

Looking around him, Wasson spotted Hoss to their right near the trees.  “Hey Hoss!  You think you can get to those horses in the trees?”

 

Hoss looked into the forest, then turned back and nodded.

 

“Take some men and see if you can come up behind them.  It’d be good if no one got away to tell Holman what to expect.”  He watched Hoss back up on his knees, and staying low, he pointed to some men, tapped a few on the shoulder, and had them follow him into the woods.  Wasson could see them catch some of the scattered horses and walk them deeper into the dimness of the trees.

 

He turned just as Adam took a shot, this time hitting the man who had been hiding behind the boulder.  He had been counting the number of men he’d seen fall, but began to pay particular attention to the shots ringing out from above him, watching where the next man flinched or fell.  Micah was somehow drawing them out of hiding and cutting them down before they could fire.  Glancing over at Wasson, Adam said, “Hoss just might not have anyone to round up from the back if Micah keeps that up.”

 

“Micah!”  Wasson yelled.  “Hold your fire!”  Moving his hand to the barrel of Adam’s rifle, he said, “Let them take their potshots.  We’ll wait for Hoss to surprise ‘em.”

 

It wasn’t long before the men heard shooting and yelling coming from somewhere in front of them, but no one was shooting their way.  Wasson stood and shouted, “Follow me!” then charged headlong into what had previously been a sure way to die.

 

As Holman’s men turned to answer Hoss’s hoard coming at them from behind, Wasson’s men drew down on them from the front stopping them in their tracks.  When all was said and done, only eight of Holman’s men were standing.  Five others were wounded and seven were dead.

 

“Hoss, did you see anyone leave?”

 

“Nosir, but I’ll go back and see if I can find any tracks headin’ out the other way.”

 

Wasson turned back to the men behind him.  “Anyone hurt?”

 

Someone from the back yelled forward, “Davy got hit, but it’s just a flesh wound.  He’ll be all right.”

 

No one else said anything, except Ben.  “Adam, I need to look at that leg wound.  It’s still bleeding pretty good.”

 

“It’s fine, Pa.  I’ll get it taken care of after we have Holman’s men rounded up.”

 

“Mr. Cartwright, I’ll make sure he’s seen to,” said Wasson.  “If you wouldn’t mind, would you take a headcount?  I wanna make sure no one’s missing.”

 

Ben nodded and began gathering the men.

 

“Adam, make sure he knows we’ll have a few with us to round up Holman’s men and tend to the wounded.”

 

Adam walked back to his father.  “Pa, we’ve got eight men with us.”  He turned to leave, but stopped and looked back.  “And Micah.”  When Ben questioned him with his eyes, Adam answered with a nod up to the ledge where Micah was sitting with his feet hanging over the side, watching and smiling as Wasson began rounding up Holman’s scouts.

 

Wasson stood over the men waiting for Adam to join him.  Glancing back at Micah still sitting on the ledge, he said, “I’m bettin’ he was counting as they fell.  From where he is, he probably dropped most of em’”.

 

“He did,” said Adam flatly.

 

Nodding at Adam’s agitation, Wasson changed the subject.  “We’re gonna bed down for the night at the next cover we find.  I’d stop here, but I don’t wanna get caught in that pass back there again.  Go ahead and send two men you trust out to find dinner.”

 

Adam sent men from the Ponderosa bunkhouse he knew to be good hunters.  These two men had no trouble finding meat to go with their beans when they camped out with the herd.  As they were leaving, Adam grabbed one of the bridles. “You two keep your eyes open.  We’re close enough to Holman’s ranch that you could run into more of his men.”  Both men nodded before they turned and headed out.

 

As dusk turned to darkness lit by campfires and lanterns, Adam sank to the ground near the fire, stretching out his leg and pulling at the sides of the tear in his trousers.  The bullet had only grazed him, but the gouge was fairly deep.

 

Hoss sat down beside him with his saddlebags.  “Let me take a look at that, Adam.  It’s gotta be deep for it to still be bleedin’.”  Using two fingers to separate the fabric of Adam’s pants, he held a lantern just above and peered into the hole.  “You’re gonna have to drop your pants for me to clean and bandage it.”

 

Rolling his eyes, Adam stood and unfastened his pants, letting them drop to the ground before he sat down on the blanket Hoss had spread out for him.

 

As Hoss tended the wound, Wasson and Ben joined them.  “Anyone else need tendin’?” asked Hoss without taking his attention off Adam’s wound.

 

“Nope,” answered Wasson.  “I’ve already got Davy patched up.  This one looks the worst of the two.”

 

“Hoss, how bad is it?” asked Ben worriedly.

 

“Aw, Pa.  It ain’t nothing but a flesh wound, but it’s a deep one.  Once I get it cleaned out, I’ll put some of Hop Sing’s salve on it and bandage it up real tight, and ol’ Adam here will be good as new.”  He chuckled. “Well, maybe a little sore.”

 

Davy, Micah and Adam were made comfortable by the campfire while everyone else found their own spot around the camp, and those preparing dinner gathered all the pots, pans, utensils and the spit and built a cook fire.  Later in the evening, once everyone’s bellies were full of an assortment of meat, including rabbit, venison and wild boar, accompanied with beans, hard tack and coffee spiked with Wasson’s ration of whiskey, the men stole away to their bedrolls, while those taking the first watch disappeared into the darkness.  Those left near the campfire made plans for the following day.

 

***

 

Shiloh left Etta and the children in the buggy near the International House and walked away in the opposite direction that Annie took.  While Annie saw Dr. Martin, Shiloh went to see what it was that Roy needed to tell her.   She returned to the buggy before Annie, so she drove over to Dr. Martin’s surgery, arriving just as Annie stepped out of the door.

 

Unable to contain her smile, Annie answered Shiloh’s questioning eyes with an adamant nod.  The trip home was filled with discussions about the baby, would it be a boy or a girl, that Adam would have to add a nursery to the house plans, and everything under the sun the baby would need.  All was forgotten about Shiloh’s visit with Roy Coffee.

 

The conversation continued through dinner at the main house, now with Joe.  “If that don’t beat all.  Hoss a father.”

 

“Is that such a surprise?” asked Annie.

 

“Well, he never…   Well, what I mean is….”  Joe blushed and stuffed his mouth with mashed potatoes.

 

Though all three women gave him a hostile glare, it was Shiloh who spoke.  “He was just waiting for the right one to come along, Joe.   And with the way you flirt with the women in the saloons, I’m surprised you haven’t already had an announcement of your own,” she said, sneering.

 

Annie covered her mouth.  “Shiloh!”

 

“Well, it’s true,” Shiloh answered with a shrug.

 

“Even it is true,” said Etta, “chances are good he’d never know.”

 

Now all eyes along with slack jaws were on Etta, who moved her eyes around the table and turned red.  “Well, all the girls talk to each other, and they all know where to go to take care of things like that…once and for all, I mean.”

 

Bowing her head, Shiloh blew out of her mouth, looked up and smiled.  “This is not a conversation Pa would approve of at his dinner table.”  Her plate empty, she dabbed her mouth with her napkin, and looked over at Rachel who was fighting to keep her eyes open.  “It’s late.  We should get back to the house and get the children in bed.”

 

Joe wiped his mouth as well and stood, pulling Shiloh’s chair out as she stood.  “I’ll ride over with you.”

 

Shiloh opened her mouth to object.  After all, the distance was only a mile.  But she smiled instead and said, “Thank you,” remembering what Roy had told her earlier.

 

That evening after the children were safe and warm in their beds, and Etta had retired after preparing the next few day’s lessons for Rachel, Shiloh wandered outside.  She settled down on a bench in the summer house looking out over the lake, her elbows on her knees, her arms crossed in front of her and her hands on her shoulders.  She hadn’t been sleeping well without Adam there.  She had become used to his presence in the bed, even in the late night when they would normally separate during their deep slumber.  She wondered where the posse would be by now, if they’d run into trouble on the way, and if Holman had been found or had managed to flee or fight his way out of arrest.  The journey would be difficult for Micah.  He’d be tired…in pain, certainly.

 

Then her thoughts drifted back to her conversation with Roy.  She had prepared a telegram for Robert and Evelyn while she was in Roy’s office and had asked him to send it.  Until she heard back, there was no point worrying.  Nothing might ever come of it, though it seemed important enough for the San Francisco Police Chief to notify Sheriff Coffee of the prison riot and escape.

 

She jumped at a sound, barely noticeable, behind her, and turned to see Ming Lin emerge from the shadows cast by the roof of the summer house.

 

“I have brought warm milk to help you rest,” said Ming Lin.

 

She smiled and accepted the coffee cup he offered.  “Ming Lin, do you ever come out here?”

 

“Yes, Mrs. Cartwright.  Sometimes in the night after the house has quieted, I come…and contemplate.”

 

“What do you…contemplate…if you don’t mind my asking?”

 

“I think about events of the day past to bring it to close, and then think about what wonders tomorrow may bring.  It is easy to…meditate,”  he flourished his arm across the view in front of them, “amid such beauty.”

 

She smiled and took a sip of the milk.

 

“Is it not the same reason you come here?”

 

“Yes, Ming Lin. This is a very good place to…contemplate.”

 

Chapter Forty-Nine

 

Wasson looked around him as the camp became quiet.  Most of the men had turned in save those few still at the fire.  Those included Ben Cartwright, his sons, Adam and Hoss, Micah Whitney, and two men Adam had introduced as Mark and Keith.  Those last two men, Wasson observed, were too comfortable with their side arms to be mere drovers.  Even so, Adam had said he trusted them implicitly to do what was asked of them.  Wasson sat down, nodded as he thought through what he was about to put in motion, and with one more look around the camp to satisfy himself that everyone else was asleep or close to it, he broke the companionable silence.  “Mr. Cartwright, I’d like you to take Mark and Keith and do some scouting for us tomorrow.”

 

Ben had been sitting on the ground, leaning back against a log.  Now he moved an arm to rest on the knee of a raised leg.  “I’m listening.”

 

“Fountain Green is between us and Holman’s ranch, about twenty to twenty-five miles northeast.  Holman doesn’t know you or the other two, so I figure you can get into town, have a drink at the saloon and listen while you enjoy a beer or two.”

 

“Wasson, I don’t think Holman or his men are going to let anything slip in front of strangers, especially if he knows a posse is on its way to take him back to Virginia City,” said Ben as he twirled his tin cup in his hand.

 

“You’re right, he won’t.  At least at first.  But when he gets a good look as these two,” he said, indicating Mark and Keith, “he’ll recognize they don’t punch cattle for a living, and when he sees them taking orders from you, he’ll think they’re there to protect you.”  He turned to Adam.  “For what it’s worth, what do they do for you, Adam?”

 

Adam chuckled.  “They guard the Whitney Mine, and when my family travels, they guard them.”

 

Raising an eyebrow, Wasson smirked as he had little respect for female entertainers.  Then again, he’d never met Cartwright’s wife.  “You mean your wife?”

 

Narrowing his eyes as he looked at Wasson, Adam replied, “She sometimes travels without me…with our son.”  Taking a deep, calming breath, he said quietly, “I see where you’re going.  Three strangers in town, two of them protection for a third older man…not likely anyone wanting to answer to the law.”

 

Wasson continued.  “After you quench your thirst in the saloon, get two nice rooms at the best hotel, then make an appointment at the bank to ask about any large parcels of land that might be for sale.  I’m sure the banker will be happy to share that with Holman.  Of course, if Holman knows what’s coming his way, he won’t give you a second thought other than settle on you not being his immediate problem.”

 

Ben thought it over.  “He’ll know the name.”

 

“Give him another name.”

 

“It’s not that simple,” said Ben.  “What if he instructs the banker to verify it?  He’ll ask where I’m from, and if I tell them Virginia City, he’ll make the connection.”

 

“If he asks where you’re from, be vague.  Tell him you’ll be riding by the land on your way out of town.  He won’t have another chance to ask any more questions.”

 

Ben shook his head.  “It’s a big risk.”

 

“If we can get the men in quick enough, they won’t have any time to figure it out.  Tell the banker you’re looking for land with a house and a barn for your foreman.  A house and a barn should be able to accommodate the men,” Wasson continued.  “If we can get ‘em in in small numbers, Holman might not notice.  He’ll be looking for a larger posse.”

 

Meeting his father’s eyes, Adam glanced across at Micah who looked as if he was dozing by the way his head lolled forward every now and then.  “What about Micah?  If Holman sees him, even from a distance, he’ll recognize him.”

 

“Don’t worry about me.”  Micah pushed his hat back up on his head and looked at all the men in turn around the campfire.  “I’ll see him long before he sees me, I promise you.”

 

“No, you won’t,” spat Wasson.  “You won’t be in any position to see Holman.  You’re gonna be one of the first to go to that house, if Mr. Cartwright can find one, and you ain’t comin’ out until Holman’s in custody.”

 

Adam watched Micah’s jaw clench as his eyes moved up to Wasson’s.  If looks could kill, Wasson would already be face down in the dirt.  “Micah,” Adam breathed, “if you have any ideas about leaving this posse to go after Holman on your own, forget it.  I’m not gonna let you.  I promised your sister I’d bring you home alive, and I intend to keep that promise.”

 

Micah slowly turned his glare to Adam.  “That’s your problem, Adam.  I’ve always thought you make too many promises.  You just might find this is one you can’t keep.”

 

“And where does that leave Shiloh?”

 

Shrugging, Micah snorted.  “She’s your responsibility.  She’s got you and Abel.  She doesn’t need me.”

 

“Micah, that’s not true,” said Ben.  “You’re what’s left of her family…her past.”

 

“Mr. Cartwright, she doesn’t need her past anymore.”  Turning away, Micah let his body slide down to his bedroll and pulled his blanket over him and his hat over his face.

 

“She’d disagree with you,” said Ben quietly.

 

The next morning, Ben, Mark and Keith were gone before Micah stirred, though he’d been awake for a while and listened as they saddled their horses and walked them away from camp.  He turned over to find Adam putting a pot of coffee on a rock next to the fire.

 

Glancing over at Micah, Adam asked, “You hungry?” as he pulled salt bacon and a small package of corn meal out of his saddlebag.

 

Micah grunted and reached for his saddlebag.  He produced a bottle, pulled the cork out and turned it up.  “Maybe.  Give me a minute.”  Once the laudanum was safely tucked away, Micah sat up, leaning against a log and letting his head fall back with his eyes closed.  “How long do you think it’ll take your pa to find a vacant house and barn?”  He waited for a moment, but no immediate answer was forthcoming.  “And how are we supposed to know when he finds it?”

 

“So you did sleep some last night.”  Adam put the cornmeal in a tin cup, poured in some water and stirred.  “I don’t know, and Mark or Keith will come back and let us know.  So you might as well get comfortable.  We may be here for a few days yet.”

 

***

 

Shiloh spent several hours in the morning and several hours in the early evening with her horses.  Now that Abel was getting food, she had more time between feedings.  He was also staying awake longer which meant Etta was earning her keep at what she was originally hired to do.  It didn’t matter to her.  She adored Abel.  Rachel was quite fond of him, too, and she was learning to play with children much younger than she.

 

This particular morning, Shiloh was working with Cotton.  The mare’s ground manners were improving, and she had become comfortable enough under saddle that Shiloh would be seeing how she rode with other horses.  She chose two four-year-old twin geldings, Darby and Derby, that she and Tom had trained along the same timeline as Cotton.

 

When Etta brought Rachel and Abel outside to walk down the hill, she stopped for a moment to watch Shiloh, Tom and Johnny riding together in the fields outside the corrals.  Every now and then one horse would nip at one of the others or rear up.  The misbehaving horse was separated from the other two who received carrot pieces.

 

Shiloh stopped riding when she saw Etta and the children at the closest corral fence.  She told Tom and Johnny to continue with Darby and Derby, then turned Cotton toward the fence.  “How were lessons this morning, Rachel?” she asked from atop the horse.

 

Rachel beamed.  “Mommy said I did good.”

 

“You did well,” corrected Etta, smiling down at her daughter with a hand placed gently on her head.

 

Abel had a finger in his mouth and his face hidden on Etta’s shoulder.

 

Twisting her mouth, Shiloh asked, “What do we have here?   Abel?”

 

Hearing his mother’s stern voice, Abel turned his head away.

 

“He’s not had a good morning.  Decided he didn’t like breakfast,” said Etta.

 

“Well then, Abel. Little boys who don’t eat their breakfast don’t get to ride.  Rachel, step up on that first fence board, and I’ll pull you up the rest of the way.  You can ride up to the house with me.”

 

“Yippee!” cried Rachel as she ran to the fence.

 

It wasn’t long before Shiloh had her sitting in front of her in the saddle.  “Hold on to the horn.  Here we go,” said Shiloh as she urged Cotton into a walk up the hill.

 

When Abel realized his mother wasn’t going to take him, too, he pouted at first, and when that didn’t work, tears began to flow as his little fingers grabbed for his mother.

 

“No, Abel, you may not ride,” said Etta, causing the angry squeal to which they both had recently become accustomed to come forth.  Now situated away from her on her hip, no matter how much he squirmed, pushed and squealed, he could not escape Etta’s arms.

 

In the afternoon, once Abel had been put down for nap and Rachel was settled behind a little desk in a chair just her size with a writing lesson, Shiloh sat behind Adam’s desk with the Ponderosa ledger open in front of her and contracts spread around her.  In order for her to know how to post payments in the ledger, she had to read the contracts to know to which agreement they belonged.  By the time Ben returned, she thought and smiled, she’d know more about the Ponderosa’s finances that any of them…except Ben, of course.

 

Joe would soon be back from town with the day’s mail and the payroll money, and Hank would be over with a list of supplies needed at the Flying W.  Since Shorty was running the sawmill, she’d send Tom and Johnny into town with Ming Lin to get supplies for both the Flying W and Adam’s share of the Ponderosa. She leaned back in her chair.  Most people thought of the main house as the Ponderosa, but truth be told, even though the house she shared with Adam was on the Ponderosa, it was, in many ways, separate.   They had their own herd in addition to the horses and their own timber interests.  Perhaps it was time to make a distinction…to make it less confusing when folks came looking for a Cartwright on the Ponderosa.

 

She had just taken a sip of coffee when a loud crash followed by hysterical crying made her jump out of the chair so quickly, she spilled her coffee all over the desk.  She looked back at the contracts, brown wetness slowly spreading and smearing the ink.  “Etta!” she shouted as she quickly moved the undamaged paper to Adam’s drawing board and threw her napkin over the others to soak up the coffee.  “Etta?” she yelled again, looking over her shoulder toward the door as she patted down the contracts.  She heard nothing but Abel screaming at the top of his lungs.

 

Freezing with indecision for a moment, she finally dropped the contracts and ran out of the office.

 

***

 

When the three men pushed through the batwing doors, no one in the saloon took notice.  But when they slowly walked through the middle of the room to a table in a back corner, two men at the bar and three men at a table watched.

 

Mark ordered a bottle of whiskey and with it arrived three glasses. He poured the three glasses, offering the first to the older of three men. Grabbing the hand of the woman who had delivered their refreshments, Mark asked, “Where’s the bank in this town?”

 

“Why, darlin’?  You gonna rob it?” she asked teasingly as she turned, leaned into him and brushed her hand over his shoulder.

 

Smiling, Mark answered, “No.  Mr. Hutton’s looking for land suitable as a stock farm, a place to allow his cattle to fatten up before they’re driven on up to Salt Lake City.”

 

“Well then, you’ll need to talk to Mr. Marley at the Salt Valley Bank.  He handles most of the land deals around here.”

 

Mark’s smile widened as he dug a coin out of his vest pocket.  “And just where is this bank?”

 

Flipping the coin up and catching it, she replied, “About five doors up on this side of the street.  Say…you think you’ll have time stop in again?”

 

“Nope.  We’re here to find land, and then head back home.  We’ve got cattle to move.  Sorry,” he said, shrugging and turning back to the others seated at the table.

 

Her smile disappeared as she slowly backed away, and then turned to try her luck at another table.

 

As the conversation was taking place, Ben watched the room, following a man who had come through the door with two others, one of whom left the saloon just as Ben had seated himself.  Another man walked back into the saloon with him. He looked around the room as he headed toward he bar, but stopped when his eyes met Ben’s.  Walking over, he stood at the opposite side of the table.  “I hear you’re looking for grazing land.”

 

Ben nodded.  “That’s right, Mr…?”

 

“Holman. Randall Holman.   And you?”

 

“Ben Hutton.”

 

“Where you from, Mr. Hutton?”

 

“I don’t see how that’s any of your business…Mr. Holman.”

 

“Well, seeing as you’re looking for land…”  He turned and smiled to one of his men, then turned back, “and I own most of the land around here, most likely you’ll be buying from me.”

 

Ben smiled and stood, prompting Mark and Keith to stand, their hands settling on their guns.  “That remains to be seen,” said Ben in a calm, commanding voice.  “I prefer working with the bank, if you don’t mind.”

 

Holman’s eyes had already moved from Mark to Keith.  His men instinctively assumed the same stance, but Holman shook his head, and they dropped their hands to their sides.  Mark and Keith, however did not which caused Holman to steam.

 

Ben stifled a smile and slightly nodded to Mark and Keith.  Both men pushed their chairs back up to the table and waited for Ben to walk past them to the saloon door.  They crossed the street while Holman and his men watched from the batwings.

 

“Looks like they’re goin’ to the hotel.  You want we should follow ’em, Mr. Holman?”

 

Keeping his eye on Ben’s back, Holman answered, “No.  He doesn’t look like he’s with any posse, but I’ll talk to Marley later.  If he’s really only after land, he’s not our immediate problem,” Holman said as he watched Hutton and his guns enter the hotel.  He turned back to his men.  “Trace should be riding in soon.  Our welcoming party should have found that posse by now.  Once we find out how many, we’ll set the trap.”

 

Chapter Fifty

 

Shiloh could see the dining area as she came out of Adam’s office.  She scanned the area without stopping and continued to the middle of the house where the staircase went up to the second floor.  Beyond that was the living area.  She could see nothing, but still heard Abel crying in earnest and rushed toward the sound.  She found the baby on the floor around the side of the stairs and lifted him, hugging him to her to calm him, and then carefully looking for injury.  “Etta!” she shouted as she looked over her son.  “Rachel?”  She heard no one but Abel.  “Ming Lin!”

 

Now she heard a scream from outside at the front of the house.  Rushing to the door, she slung it open to find a man practically dragging Etta away from the house with Rachel grabbing at her mother’s skirt.  The man turned and grabbed Rachel’s arm, slinging her to the ground.

 

Turning back into the house, Shiloh went to the entry table and pulled a pistol out of a drawer.  Adam kept it there in case of trouble when he would need quick access to a weapon.

 

She looked at Abel who was clinging to her and whimpering.  “I’m so sorry, Abel, but I’ve got to put you down,” she said as she hurried into the living area, pushed the cradle behind the sofa with a foot and sat Abel in it.  For a moment, the child was silent, but as soon as Shiloh stepped away, he continued his wailing.

 

On the way back toward the front door, she took a rifle from the gun cabinet, made sure it was loaded and grabbed the pistol as she passed the entry table.  Stepping out on the front porch, she pointed the Colt into the air and fired three times after which she dropped the pistol and raised the rifle, aiming it toward the man who was dragging Etta away.

 

“Stop right now or I’ll shoot!” she yelled, watching the man’s reaction over the rifle sight.

 

He stopped, but before he turned, he drew his gun, holding it against Etta’s head as he turned with an arm around her.

 

The three shots Shiloh had fired brought the men working in the stables and those men working near the main house up the hill on the track from the main road.  When they saw the stand-off, everyone drew their rifles or handguns and surrounded the intruder, keeping a discreet distance as the man slowly turned all the way around.  Tom dismounted, ran forward and lifted Rachel off the ground, carrying her to the barn and out of harm’s way.

 

“You have no chance to get out of here alive if you harm her!  Let her go!” yelled Shiloh.

 

The man yelled back, “If these men don’t back off, I will kill her!”

 

Aiming carefully, Shiloh slowly squeezed the trigger.  Everyone was startled by the shot, the intruder more so as his hat flew off behind him.

 

“The next one will be two inches lower,” yelled Shiloh.  “Let her go!”

 

One of the men from the main house, holstered his weapon, took his rope off his saddle and began to make a noose.  “One way or another mister, you’ll be dead.  It don’t matter to us which way.”

 

***

 

“Mark, get a room and get comfortable.  We’ll be riding out at first light tomorrow morning.  Keith, you’re with me.”

 

“And where would we be going, Mr….Hutton?” asked Keith.

 

Ben smiled.  “We’re going to see that Mr. Marley at the bank, who will be anxious to sell some foreclosed land Holman hasn’t snatched up yet.  But we won’t be closing a deal.  I’ll ask for several properties to check out as we head back home…to Sacramento.”

 

Mark looked around the hotel lobby as he asked, “Then what?”

 

“We’ll go decide which one suits our purposes better, and then we’ll wait.”  Ben answered their raised brows.  “We’ll wait for Holman to come check to see if we are who we say we are.  And then we’ll wait some more while you two ride the property to see if anyone is watching.  After that Keith will ride back to get the first group of men while Mark and I continue to look for any sign of Holman.”  Ben turned for the door, but stopped and looked back at Keith.  “You coming?”

 

Chuckling, Keith smiled over at Mark.  “So this is where he gets it.”

 

When he and Ben were out the door, Ben asked, “This is where who gets what?”

 

“Adam and his ability to adapt, sir.”

 

Keith and Ben were in the bank just over an hour.   Holman watched from a chair propped against a wall at a discreet distance as the two men left with a handful of papers.  They went back to the hotel, and according to his man he left in his place, they stayed, having what would be considered a lavish dinner for such a small town restaurant before they retired to their room, almost immediately turning the lamp down.

 

The next man reported to Holman at the Holman Ranch after he dispatched another of Holman’s men to follow Hutton and his guns.  “They left at first light.  I sent Emmett to follow ’em.”

 

Holman set his coffee cup heavily on his dining room table, pushed himself up from his chair and lifted his gun belt off an entry table.  “Isaiah, saddle my horse.  I need to pay Mr. Marley a visit.”

 

Marley was expecting him when Holman walked in to the bank.  He nervously ushered the rancher to an office at the back of the building and offered him a glass and a bottle of whiskey.

 

“Who is he?” asked Holman.

 

“I assume you mean the man who came in yesterday looking for land.  His name is Ben….”

 

“I know his name.  Where’s he from?  What does he want?”

 

The banker’s hands slightly shook as he poured his whiskey down his throat.  “He’s from California.  He’s looking for land to graze his stock to fatten them before he drives them on into Salt Lake City for delivery.”

 

Holman gave Marley an impatient look and very purposefully poured himself another shot of whiskey.

 

“He took some information on three parcels south,” continued Marley.  “Asked if he could look around.  I went over the property maps with him.  He was interested in water rights.  The maps he took had water with the parcels.”

 

Holman nodded.  “Makes sense.”

 

“Then he asked if I knew who he could speak with in Gunnison.  Seems he’ll be looking at land there as well.”

 

“And all this took an hour of your time?”  asked Holman, scowling.

 

“Well, it took some time to pull the maps out of the files, and then Mr. Hutton asked some very detailed questions about the property…if there was a house, a barn where his hands could stable their horses, and hay sheds. He was aware that we sometimes have fires because the stacks get so hot they ignite.”

 

“A house?  Why a house?”

 

“He wasn’t exactly looking for a house…he asked for a bunkhouse for his men, but then decided a house would do.  Same difference,” Marley said and shrugged.

 

“Where’s he going first?” Holman asked as he stood.

 

“Well, since he’s looking at these parcels as he heads back home, I would think he’s going to look at the closest one first.   That would be the old Millard place.”

 

Without so much as a thank you, Holman got up and left.  And that was fine with Marley who sighed in relief as he watched the man most everyone in town dreaded and avoided walk away from his bank.

 

By the time Holman left the bank, Ben and the two men with him had already arrived at the Millard place.  The house was a good sized two-story house nestled in some trees that offered some protection from being seen from the surrounding flat fields of wild oats.  A well and a large barn were there among the trees as well.

 

They were well aware that two men had followed them, so Ben sent Mark in one direction and Keith in the opposite direction after appearing to look at the map Marley provided.  Ben stayed and explored the buildings.

 

When Mark and Keith reported back, Holman’s two men had split, one following each of them.   “We can take care of them now, Mr. Cart…”  Mark looked at his feet before smiled and looked back up.  “Mr. Hutton.”

 

Ben gave him a sharp look.  “We’re not here to murder anyone.”   He glared at Mark to make sure his point was understood.  “This one has good cover, but it’s too close for comfort.  We’ll keep looking.”

 

By the time they looked over the last ranch, they had concocted a plan of what to do with Holman’s two men.  They would be bound and gagged and taken to Wasson to join the men who had jumped them at the pass.  It was an easy task for Mark and Keith.  Once Holman’s men were securely tied to their horses, Keith went on his way to join the others, and would tell the rest how to get to the abandoned ranch Ben had chosen.  Ben and Mark remained to answer any questions Holman had when he caught up to them. They would tell him that Keith was out hunting for their dinner.

 

Keith left before light the next morning.  He had about forty miles to ride to find Wasson’s posse, and he wanted to make it by nightfall.   When he walked his horse into camp, he surprised those who were still awake into drawing their guns, only had Keith been one of Holman’s men, it would have been too late.

 

“You fellas are getting too comfortable.  I could have just stayed back there,” he said, pointing over his shoulder, “and taken out five or six of you,” said Keith.

 

When Wasson and Adam heard Keith’s voice, they relaxed and put their guns away.  “We have lookouts who should have seen you,” said Wasson.  Turning he motioned to one of the other men.  “Go find them and see what they’re up to.  And be quiet.  I don’t want to find that Holman has really found us.   Take another man with you.”   Turning back to Keith, Wasson asked, “Did you ride all day?”

 

“Yep.  I figured the quicker I went the less likely anyone would catch up.  Oh, other than these two.”  Keith walked back into the darkness and pulled two horses into the light bearing the tied men.   “Holman sent these two to watch us.  Mr. Cartwright thought it better to ‘take them out of the equation,’ as he put it.”

 

“Get some grub,” said Wasson as he led the two horses deeper into their camp.

 

Once Keith was settled next to the fire with a plate of beans and rabbit, Adam sat near him and passed him a cup of whiskey.  “Everything go all right in town?”

 

“Yeah.  Your pa chose three abandoned ranches to look at.  Ended up choosing the last one.  They all had a barn and a house and water, so it came to proximity.  He wanted to be as far away from town has he could get.  Figured that would make more sense since we were supposed to be on our way home.”

 

“Did he say when he wanted to start moving the men?”

 

Keith chewed what was in his mouth as he nodded.  “He said wait two days.  If Mark doesn’t come in to warn us, the first group should go. But I figure if I get a couple hours of sleep, I can head back.  That way, if Holman shows up, he won’t become suspicious because I’m not there.”

 

Wasson was returning from the area where they were holding Holman’s men and was close enough to hear Keith’s answer.  “That’s probably a good idea, Keith. I want Micah and you, Adam, in the first group.  You need to get Micah settled somewhere he doesn’t have easy access to a door.  You can also take those two guns your father brought with him.  They’re itchin’ for a fight.  I figure if Holman figures us out, those two plus Mark and Keith are the best to have on the front line. Besides that, Holman’s gonna come lookin’ for his men.  I know the sheriff down in Gunnison.  I’m thinkin’ of takin’ a couple of men with me to deliver ‘em and let ’em sit in jail until I can arrange to have some justice dispensed.”

 

Adam nodded, pushing his bottom lip up.  “If I’m gone, and you’re gone, who’s going to make sure the rest of them get to the ranch?”

 

“Hoss,” said Wasson with a wide grin.  “I don’t think anyone here is willing to tangle with a grizzly.   He knows your men, so I’ll let him pick who goes in the next group, and then he’ll follow with the rest.  By the time everyone’s headed out, I should be on my way back from Gunnison.”

 

Later in the evening as Adam prepared his bedroll for sleep, Micah watched.  He knew Adam’s habits like they were his own, only they weren’t.  While Adam set his saddle on the ground just so, laid his blankets down just so, and tucked his gun right under the edge, Micah said quietly, “Why are you even taking me along, Adam?  You know what I intend to do.”

 

Adam glanced over at him as he rolled out a second blanket for cover.  “Because in the end, you’ll be the better man.”

 

“What d’you mean?”

 

“You’ve got everyone believing Mort Williams is a different man than Micah Whitney.  In a lot of ways, that may be true, but not deep down.”  Sitting down on his blanket, Adam shrugged.  “You were born Micah Whitney.  Mort Williams came along because you needed to disappear and earn a living, and the only other thing besides ranching you’re good at is shootin’.”  He paused and took a long look at Micah’s face.  “But not killing.  Maybe Mort Williams would be bent on revenge, but Mort Williams won’t be the one present making that decision at the last minute.  Even if he is, he’s not a killer, and that’s because there really isn’t a Mortimer Williams.  There’s just Micah Whitney…the better man.”

 

Adam didn’t wait to see if Micah had a response.  He laid down, turned away and pulled the blanket up over him.
Chapter Fifty-One

 

Sweat began to bead on his forehead.  Looking from the woman he held against him and the woman on the porch, he realized his mistake.  When it all began, he wasn’t going to leave without the Cartwright woman even if he had to take a few bullets, but the woman he was holding wasn’t the right one.

 

The man who’d sent him here had been a brutal cellmate in prison.  The first night, he’d used a fork to inflict his pain.  After that, the man had beaten him about the head until he gave up his meager prison rations, reducing him to less than one meal a day.  Starvation wasn’t pleasant.  Once reduced to believing his death was inevitable, Willy Forment agreed to anything to get his rations back.

 

It was clear this man who’d shared his cell and refused to name himself hadn’t been a man who had worked hard for his money.  He had a holier-than-thou attitude, and it was obvious he’d come from money based on the number of prisoners who followed him around like he was a god.  This man had asked a few questions and found that Willy had earned his life sentence being known as Torment Forment.  But now, Forment was the one receiving the torment.  Now that his tormentor was no longer in prison, perhaps the safest place was back behind bars.

 

Willy knew he was surrounded.  He looked back at the woman on the porch who was wearing a determined stone-cold expression and knew she would pull the trigger.  Based on her first shot, she’d probably hit her mark.  Now came the hard decision.  Did he want to die right here, right now, or did he want to chance a later date with death?

 

Dropping his gun, Willy quickly raised his hands and met the eyes of the woman holding the rifle.  She hadn’t moved at all when he surrendered.  She didn’t lower her rifle until he was bound and half dragged to the steps leading up to the porch where she stood.

 

“Take him down to the stable and lock him in the feed room,” said Shiloh with the rifle lowered.  “Tom, guard the door until Sheriff Coffee arrives.  Johnny, ride into town and fetch him.  Tell him the man he warned me about has sent someone to do his dirty work.”

 

In all the excitement, Shiloh hadn’t noticed that Hop Sing and Annie had arrived in a buggy, but had stayed back down the track.  Now, they drove into the yard.  Annie climbed down and went to Etta who had sunk to the ground, sobbing.  Rachel was at her side, frightened and crying as well.

 

Hop Sing took the little girl’s hand and followed as Annie helped Etta to the house.  When Annie passed Shiloh to take Etta inside, she noticed the fierce determination still in Shiloh’s eyes.  “Are you all right?”

 

Her chest rising as she allowed a deep breath to fill her lungs, she nodded, but didn’t say anything to Annie.  “Hop Sing,” she said, taking his arm and crossing the porch toward the kitchen.  “Ming Lin didn’t answer my calls.”  The concern on Hop Sing’s face matched her own.  “Please check on him while I get Abel.”

 

He touched her arm as she turned.  “Baby all right?”

 

With a gentle smile, she replied, “He’s fine,  Hop Sing.  More angry with the way he was left on the floor than anything.  As soon as I check on Etta and Rachel, I’ll be right in,” she finished, nodding toward the kitchen.  Once Hop Sing had disappeared through the door, she turned back to the front door and hurried in.

 

She found Etta sitting on the sofa, holding Rachel.  She didn’t see Annie, but heard her voice behind the sofa, calming the baby.  When she stood, Abel was in her arms and had quieted down to only whimpers.

 

Shiloh stood for a moment and closed her eyes.  This was too close.  She never thought anything would come from Roy’s news about the prison break.  After all, San Francisco was a long way away.   If anything was going to happen, she thought she would hear from Robert or Evelyn Slater first.  After all, Robert was as involved in putting this man away as was Adam and Micah.

 

She continued into the living area and knelt in front of Etta.  “I know you’re frightened, Etta. Are you all right?”

 

“I’ll live,” she said, attempting to smile though her chin was still quivering.

 

“And Rachel?”

 

“Some scrapes and bruises.  She’ll be fine.”

 

“Annie,  I didn’t see any marks when I found him,” said Shiloh with a look of hope on her face.

 

“He seems to be all right.  I think he’s more angry than anything.  Etta said that man just sort of dropped him on the floor and shoved him aside with a foot,” Annie replied.

 

Everyone turned toward the kitchen when Hop Sing came out calling Shiloh.  “Missy Cartlight.  Ming Lin hit on head.  He out.  I send for Kam Lee.”

 

“How bad is it, Hop Sing?”

 

“He not wake up.  I move to bed.  I send for Kam Lee.”

 

Shiloh rubbed her brow.  Hop Sing was one of the most level-headed of the bunch when someone was injured, but it was apparent he was worried.  “Can I do anything?”

 

Shaking his head, Hop Sing answered, “Must wait for Kam Lee.”

 

When Shiloh returned to the living area, Annie met her with Abel.  The little boy practically dove into his mother’s arms, moving his arms down in front of him, and laying his head on her shoulder.  She knew he would be right there on her shoulder the rest of his day.  “Etta, I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t want to stay after this.”

 

Etta held Rachel tightly to her, the little girl’s body shaking from the trembling of her mother.  “Mrs. Cartwright, I think if something was a going to happen to Rachel or me, I’d rather have you defending us than anyone else.  And all the men…”  She shuddered, but tried to control her voice. “I didn’t know you knew how to shoot a gun.”

 

Snorting tiredly, Shiloh sat down in a chair. “Daddy taught me to shoot a rifle. Adam taught me to use a pistol.  Before we were married…before Micah came home, I ran the Flying W.  I rode everywhere on the ranch alone.  Adam insisted I learn how to shoot a pistol if I was going to continue to ride alone, so he taught me.  I’m not that good with a pistol, but I can hold my own with a rifle.”

 

Annie sat next to Etta and pulled Rachel up into her lap to check her over.  “Who was that man?”

 

“I don’t know who he was,” said Shiloh, “but I have a pretty good idea who sent him.  Do you remember when Roy asked me to see him at his office the last time we were in town?  He warned me that an acquaintance of Adam’s…who Adam had helped put in prison…had escaped.  I just never thought…I mean, he was in San Francisco.”

 

“Well, now that we know, you’ll have to be more careful,” said Annie.  “I think you all should come stay at the main house.  The men are spread pretty thin now that forty of them are off chasing that Mr. Holman.”

 

Shiloh cast her eyes up at the ceiling before she looked back at Annie.  “I have horses to train.  And I need access to my piano.  I can’t just up and leave.  Besides, this particular man will be in Roy’s jail.  I’m not so sure Daniel Slater will be ready to send another…or come himself.”

 

Furrowing her brows, Annie said, “Slater?  Isn’t that Adam’s partner’s name?”

 

“Daniel is Robert Slater’s younger brother,” Shiloh replied, nodding.  “He tried to kill Adam when Adam joined their engineering firm and insisted on being second in the partnership.  That’s why I thought we were safe.  I thought he’d try to get to Robert first, and that Adam would be home before anything came of it out here.  I sent Robert a telegram, but I haven’t heard back. But Annie,” Shiloh continued, giving Annie a stern look.  “I am not running to the main house every time Adam’s away. I’ll ask Roy if he knows someone I can hire to watch the house until Adam gets home.”

 

Annie and Shiloh sat silently on the sofa after moving Etta and Rachel upstairs to rest.  Shiloh rose to answer a knock at the front door.

 

As he handed the mail to her, Johnny said, “Mrs. Cartwright, Sheriff Coffee’s gone down to the stables.   He said he’d come by to talk to you before he left.”

 

“Thank you, Johnny. Did you happen to see Kam Lee on his way?”

 

“Yes’m. He’s just coming up the track.”

 

When she smiled and nodded, Johnny tipped his hat and headed toward the stables.  She waited for Kam Lee to come up the front steps.  “I’m so glad you could come, Kam Lee.  This way.”

 

When she got to Ming Lin’s door, she stopped.  “Kam Lee, Hop Sing is very worried, and therefore, so am I.  Do whatever you need to do for Ming Lin.  If you need anything, I’ll make sure you have it.”

 

Kam Lee nodded with a smile, waiting for Mrs. Cartwright to leave.  He knew she was aware of their customs.  A Chinese man’s quarters, injured or otherwise, was no place for a lady.

 

***

 

The two men shook hands in the dark, the first leaving the other a map. In a moment, Keith was gone.  Adam turned to the horses still tied to the picket line, but saddled and ready to go.  There were no good choices for how to get the ranch without being seen.  The direct route was straight up a wide valley between two mountain ranges.  The eastern route would take them to Springtown, a small farming community, then due west to the ranch across the same wide valley.  The last option was the more difficult. They would head just west of the valley, travelling through the San Pitch Mountains where remnants of the tribes of the Ute were known to hide.

 

Wasson handed Adam’s reins to him.  “The Ute aren’t much for fightin’ these days.  More for hidin’.  I don’t think they’ll give you any problems.  But keep your men together.  The trails through those mountains can wind you around in circles.”

 

Adam mounted his horse.  “As long as there’s clear skies, we’ll be fine.  We’ll mark an ‘X’ at any crossroads so the men following can find the way.”

 

“Clear skies?”  asked Wasson.

 

Glancing up at the heavens, Adam answered, “The sun during the day, the stars at night.”

 

“You sound like a sailor.”

 

“It’s in the blood,” said Adam, chuckling. “My father and grandfather were men of the sea.”

 

Wasson eyebrows shot up.  “Ben Cartwright?  A sailor?”

 

Adam shrugged and reined his horse forward.  He turned around in the saddle, moving one hand to Sport’s rump.  “You men stay close.  I don’t want to have to back track to find anyone.  Micah, you’re up front with me.”

 

Micah appeared beside him.  “You don’t trust me?”

 

“Nope.  But more than that, I need your eyes.  You’re liable to spot trouble before anyone else knows it’s there.”

 

“Adam, I’ll be heading to Gunnison with the last group of men,” said Wasson.  “I figure a day of hard riding to get there, half a day to make arrangements for Holman’s men.  We’ll ride through the night and camp here, then leave for the ranch the next day.  That’ll be the day after Hoss leaves with his men, so we’ll be about a day and half behind Hoss.  If you run into any trouble that could give us away, send word back, and we’ll head for Spring City.”

 

Tipping his hat, Adam nudged Sport forward.  Micah rode by his side as the other men fell in line behind.  The going was slow through the first few hours until the first rays of the sun broke over the horizon.  That’s when they realized they were being followed.

 

Adam glanced over at Micah whose eyes were moving to either side of them until he reached his hand over to touch Adam’s arm. Adam pulled Sport to a stop and held his hand up to stop the men behind them.

 

A lone Indian stood on the trail in front of him.

 

“Do you speak the white man’s tongue?” asked Micah.

 

The Indian nodded.

 

“We mean you no harm.  We are passing through.”

 

“It is what the white man say,” replied the Ute.

 

Micah replied in the language of the Ute.

 

Cocking his head, the Ute looked warily at Micah.  “No, they do not worry with knowing our tongue…our ways.”

 

“We ask only permission to pass.  If you follow, we will share a meal.”

 

“Why do you want to pass?  The way of the valley is easy.”

 

“We are here to hold a white man responsible for his wrong-doings.  He will spend the rest of his life in exile from his people.”
“Who is this white man?”

 

“His name is Holman.”

 

With that, the Ute’s eyes became fierce as he stood taller.  “We will follow.  I have many asks.”  Giving a sharp nod, he looked to either side of the trail.  Eight more Ute men came out of the boulders that surrounded them.

 

Raising his brows, Adam tightened his lips together and bounced his head.  He looked at Micah still with his lips pressed together, then pinched the bridge of his nose.  “Micah, we were supposed to be riding straight through.  We don’t have anything but dried beef to share.”

 

Micah leaned toward Adam.  “These people have a problem with Holman.  I’m thinkin’ they’d be willing to help or at least make sure the rest of the men get to the ranch safely.  Maybe even take care of any men Holman sends to find us.”

 

Twisting his mouth, Adam nodded. “All right.  You know more about these people than I do.  You do speak their language,” Adam finished with a smirk.

 

Moving his hand for them to follow, the Indian who stopped them turned and continued down the trail.  The other’s seemed to vanish into thin air, though the white men knew they were still there.

Chapter Fifty-Two

 

It was a rare occurrence when Shiloh poured herself a brandy.  But tonight, after everyone in the house was fed, after Etta, Rachel and Abel were settled upstairs, after Annie left for home…after Kam Lee had taken Ming Lin to Chinatown…

 

Taking another sip of her brandy as she sat staring into the fire feeling very alone, she noticed the rings moving outward from the center of the liquid she was about to sip again, and held her hand up in front of her. She was trembling.  She took a sudden breath, fighting back tears.

 

She wasn’t worried about Daniel Slater.  Roy had put three men outside the house, had sent telegrams to all the cities, towns and settlements in the area with a description of Daniel Slater, and had sent another telegram to the Chief of Police in San Francisco inquiring on the safety of Robert and Evelyn Slater.

 

Aside from all of that, everyone was safe except for Ming Lin.  He’d been injured before taking care of them and had stayed with them, but now Kam Lee said he didn’t know if Ming Lin would survive, and so he took him where he could do the most good…back to Chinatown where he would have the help of those who knew what Kam Lee needed before he asked.  Ming Lin was in the best place he could be under the circumstances.

 

If only Adam were here.  The man Daniel Slater had hired to abduct her would have never gotten into the house.  What she wouldn’t give to feel Adam’s arms around her now, to hear him whisper in her ear that she was safe and everything was going to be all right.

 

There was only one thing that came out of this that she knew with certainty.  Adam had told her when he was teaching her to use a gun, “Before you point a gun at a man, be sure you can live with the consequences.”  She had no doubt she would have pulled the trigger if it meant saving Etta, and she would have had no trouble living with the consequences.

 

It was late, but here was no point going upstairs.  Sleep would not come tonight.  Rather she would stay in the company of the fire.

 

The next morning, Etta found her and escorted her to the bedroom.  “I’ve drawn a bath for you, Mrs. Cartwright.  While you undress, I’ll collect Master Abel.”

 

Shiloh gave her a weary, though a quite awake smile.  “Thank you, Etta.  Would you mind preparing breakfast this morning for you, Rachel and Abel. I’m afraid I’m not very hungry.”

 

“I will be happy to prepare breakfast for all of us, including you.  Mr. Cartwright told me you have a tendency to avoid eating when something is weighing heavy on your mind.  I am to make sure you eat.”

 

Shiloh giggled as she disrobed.  “Sometimes I think he thinks I’m a heifer in his herd, and he’ trying to fatten me up to sell.  I was fat after I had Abel, and he seemed quite happy with that.”  When she saw the look of concern on Etta’s face, she softened.  “Etta, I’m a performer, and I have stage clothes that must fit.  But you and Adam are right.  I tend to stop eating when…”  Bringing her hand to her mouth, she finished.  “…when things happen.  I’ll be down with Abel once we’re both clean, and he’s had his morning milk.”

 

Etta’s lips transformed into a wide grin.  “Very good, Mrs. Cartwright,” she said before leaving the washroom to retrieve Abel.

 

Later at the breakfast table, conversation was sparse, neither woman having come to terms with the events of the prior day.  “Mrs. Cartwright, I wonder…I didn’t notice at the time, but I remember as I was being helped to the house…there were men from all around.  How did they know?”

 

“I can see why you wouldn’t remember, Etta, considering….”  Shiloh grimaced at the memory, then became quite serious.  “You must remember this, especially if you are ever alone here.  At the first sign of trouble, you must take the gun from the drawer of the entry table, go outside and fire it into air three times.  The men who are close enough to hear will come.”

 

A knock at the door broke the sober look the two women shared. “Excuse me,” said Etta as she dabbed her mouth with her napkin and rose.

 

***

 

Traveling through the San Pitch Mountains was slow with narrow trails, climbing and dropping, blind corners around rocky precipices and wide open spaces on granite where the horses slipped and heat radiated up off the rock. Then again, there were wide open areas that reminded Adam of the high desert mountains back home.  He stopped the men to give the horses a break in a rare shady area and collected the dried beef they carried to offer their new friends.

 

Their path to the ranch was covered by boulders as they made their way down out of the mountains, and then by trees in the forests on land that was too rocky to clear for grazing.  The house sat at the edge of the forest, so it was easy to come to the back without being seen by anyone watching from the valley.

 

Mark however, had seen them coming and called for Ben, pointing up into the trees where they could just see movement here and there among the trees.  By this time Keith had joined them and brought all the weapons and ammunition they possessed.

 

“We’re not going to fire until we’re fired upon,” said Ben.  “Is that clear?” he said, looking back at the guns Keith had gathered.

 

“I’m just taking precautions, Mr. Cartwright,” answered Keith.

 

By the time the two men turned back to the view, Mark was holstering his gun.  “It’s Adam.”

 

“You two stay up here.  Let me know if we’re about to have other company,” said Ben as he turned away from the window and left the room.  By the time Adam and his men came out of the trees in the back clearing, Ben was waiting for him.  “Adam, you made good time.  Keith hasn’t been back but a day.”

 

Dismounting from his horse, Adam shook his father’s hand.  “We had some help coming through the mountains.”

 

“We expected to see you coming up the valley.”

 

Adam chuckled.  “You and possibly Holman.  I don’t think he’d have suspected us taking to the mountains considering he’s stirred up the Ute.  When we told them we were after Holman, they were happy to help.”  His eyes turned serious.  “Holman’s starving them out.”

 

Ben only grunted. That seemed to be the universal idea when it came to the natives who occupied land the white man wanted.  “How will the others know they’re friendly?”

 

“I gave Isi, our guide, my pocket watch.  He’s to give it to Hoss.  I also told him Wasson’s first name and described him.  He’ll greet him by name.”

 

“Good,” said Ben, nodding.  “Let’s get these men and horses inside.  Then we need to talk about plans to draw Holman out.”

 

Adam passed his reins to one of the men before he went to help Micah down.  He and Ben waited as Micah slowly made his way to the house.

 

“You’ll be upstairs, Micah,” said Adam.

 

Slowly turning, Micah gave him a menacing look.  “I’ll stay down here.”

 

“No, you won’t,” Adam replied, returning the look.  “With all these men, I’ll have no problem getting you up there.  Besides, it’s the best place for you to be.  You’re one of four who can identify Holman, and I’m betting you’ll spot him before anyone else.  I need you up there to do that.”

 

Micah scowled. “How do you know I won’t take a shot?”

 

“Because if you do, chances are most of us won’t get out of here alive.  And I’m betting you won’t ignore the damage you can cause.  Now, do you want help or do you want to attempt those stairs alone?” Adam asked, glancing toward the stairs and back.

 

“You’re as bad as Shy,” said Micah defeatedly.  “I could use a shoulder.  And my saddlebags.”

 

The corner of Adam’s mouth turned up as he moved underneath Micah’s arm.  “She does have her ways, doesn’t she?”

 

Grunting, Micah slowly moved one foot up after the other.  “She infects your conscience,” he said through gritted teeth.

 

Heading for a wall, Micah slowly sank down as Adam held his arms.  “I’ll be up in a minute with our bedroll and saddlebags.”

 

Micah bit down on his bottom lip and nodded.

 

After settling Micah down for his laudanum-induced stupor, Adam walked slowly and heavily down the stairs.  Many of the men had found space for their bedrolls upstairs while Adam was tending to Micah.  No one had given that particular room a second thought considering Ben’s, Keith’s and Mark’s gear was already there.  With three steps left to descend, Adam stopped and looked around what would have been a parlor and dining room.  The men had silently and efficiently made their beds, each one claiming a piece of wall to lean against as they waited.  Finding his father leaning against a window frame, looking over the wide valley beyond, Adam tapped him on the shoulder and nodded toward the back of the house where he hoped they would be able to have a private conversation.

 

“We have to get twenty-four more men in this house, Pa.  It’s going to get cramped.  Once they get here, we need to know what the plan’s going to be before they start getting restless.”

 

Ben nodded and shoved a hand in a pocket.  “I’ve been thinking about that.  I think we’ll have to show our hand.”  Adam started to object, but Ben moved a hand to his arm. “Let me finish.  We won’t have a chance if we ride into town after him.  There are two kinds of men in that town.  The men who work for him, and the men who are scared of him and will do anything he says.”

 

“Just how do you plan to draw him out?”

 

“Wasson, Keith, Mark, Barney’s two men and myself will ride up on the hill above the town.  Holman knows Keith, Mark and me.  Wasson was a Marshal in this territory at one time.  I’m counting on Holman knowing him.  Barney’s two men are there for numbers.  When Holman sees Wasson, he’ll know we’re here for him, and seeing me, Keith and Mark, he’ll know where we are.  That should give us an advantage.  We should be able to see him and his men coming for miles.”   He looked down and frowned.  “Except if they come out of the mountains.”

 

“We’ve got another problem, Pa.  We don’t know how many men Holman will bring with him.”

 

“I’m counting on him thinking our numbers will be no more than the last posse.  That was only ten men.”

 

A slow smile spread across Adam’s lips.  “I think we can arrange a welcoming party if they try to go up into the mountains.  Isi’s been waiting to deal with Holman on his own terms.”  His smile turned to a smirk.  “All we have to do is feed him.”

 

“We don’t want Isi to deal with Holman,” barked Ben.

 

Folding his lips and raising his brow, Adam said, “Based on Micah’s conversation with him, I don’t really think Isi will mind leaving Holman to us.”

 

Ben’s hands moved to his hips. “Oh?  And what exactly did Micah say we were going to do with him?”

 

“Well,” said Adam, crossing his arms, “he explained that the words ‘exile’ and ‘prison’ have close to the same meaning in white man’s tongue.”

 

Ben grunted as he looked at his son under thick, black brows.  “Take Keith and another man out through the back to go hunting.  Bring back enough to leave some with the Ute.  If Hoss and Warren can get through those mountains as quickly as you, the last of the men should be here day after tomorrow.  In three days, we’ll ride into town.  I expect after that, it’ll be over one way or another fairly quickly.”

 

The morning of the third day, after all the men found space in the house and all their horses were standing side by side in the barn, Ben and Wasson left with the other men, heading through the mountains that would eventually look out over the town of Fountain Green.  Ben was sure Holman would have lookouts.  They should be easily seen.

 

It didn’t take long for Holman to step out of the batwing doors of the saloon and look straight at them. He pulled a man to his side, and without taking his eyes off the men on the flank of the western grade, he appeared to speak, then gave the man a shove.  He stayed long enough to watch the intruders disappear into the boulders and trees of the mountain.

 

Chapter Fifty-Three

 

Joe stood at the door fidgeting.  Normally he would have opened the door and yelled after he knocked, but that didn’t seem quite appropriate now.  When Etta opened the door, he quickly removed his hat and gave her a bright smile.  “Miss Etta, I…well…I wanted to apologize that I wasn’t here yesterday.  The men told me what happened.  I just wanted make sure you and Rachel are all right.”

 

Etta blushed.  “Thank you, Joe.  Won’t you come in?  We’re just having breakfast.”

 

“It’s a little late for breakfast, isn’t it?” asked Joe, entering the house as Etta stepped aside.

 

“Normally, yes, but everyone here is a little…well, none of us are ourselves.”

 

Walking into the dining room, Etta waited while Joe rounded the table to kiss Shiloh on the forehead.  “You know, Adam told us you were a fair shot.  I just thought he was bragging.”

 

She snorted and rubbed her brow.  “Would you like some breakfast? I know you were probably on your own this morning.”

 

Moving to hold Etta’s chair as she resumed her seat, he replied, “I know how to cook eggs and bacon.”  He chuckled and sat in the empty chair across from Etta.  “But I have to admit, making your own breakfast is easy to talk yourself out of.”  Etta passed him a plate while Shiloh poured him a cup of coffee.

 

During breakfast, both women filled him in on the events of the past day.  “You know Hop Sing asked permission to stay in town?  As if he had to ask,” said Joe.  “And one of the Alder boys came for Annie last night.  It seems the next Alder is being impatient.”

 

“Oh,” said Shiloh with furrowed brows.  “It’s much too soon.  Annie was afraid of that.”

 

“Anyway,” Joe said as he pored over his plate of eggs, “I thought, if you’d be up for it, Miss Etta,  I’d take you and Rachel for a ride to the lake.  Maybe take a picnic lunch.”  He glanced up. “To take your mind off yesterday.”

 

“I don’t know, Joe.  I think I should stay here in case Mrs. Cartwright needs anything.  She hasn’t slept since…yesterday’s excitement.”

 

Joe turned to Shiloh with his nostrils flared and wearing a disingenuous smile. “Well, you can go with us.”

 

“No,” said Shiloh, waving her hand.  “I’m still not sleepy, and I have things to do.  Nervous energy, I guess.  You two go ahead.  We’ll be fine,” she said, looking down at Abel who was content to hold onto his mother quietly now that his belly was full.  “He had some excitement of his own.”

 

“What happened?” said Joe, suddenly serious.

 

“Nothing that hurt him…only made him angry.  And perhaps a little frightened,” Shiloh answered, tweaking the baby’s nose and drawing a grunted, short laugh from him after which he lay his head on his mother’s chest and quieted again.

 

“It’s my fault.”  Etta clenched her fist as she twisted her napkin. “He came right through the door, and I just stood there while he took Abel by the arm and let him drop to the floor.  When he shoved him away with his foot, I was just stunned.  Never in my wildest dreams had I ever entertained someone treating a baby in such a way.”

 

Reaching over to her hand, Shiloh smiled.  “Etta, you did nothing wrong.  It’s over, and we’re protected. There are three men outside the house, and Daniel Slater would be a fool if he tried to tangle with Joe.  You and Rachel should go.  I think you’ll enjoy another view of the lake.”  Looking over at Rachel, she added, “And you might even find a spot to put your feet in.  But go slowly.  It’s very cold.”

 

With her mouth full, Rachel nodded and smiled.

 

“All right, then,” said Joe, clapping his hands together.  “It’s settled.  I’ll help you clean up the breakfast dishes and make lunch.”

 

Shiloh’s mouth dropped open.  “Since when do you volunteer for kitchen duty?”

 

Joe waffled. “I…help…in the kitchen…sometimes.”

 

***

 

Ben, Wasson and the others rode fast into the yard of the ranch house.  They passed the reins of their horses to the men who were tasked with taking most of the stock to a corral several miles away where the Ute promised they would tend them.  If Holman tried to burn them out, the horses would be one thing off their minds.

 

Gathering the men in the large room on the first level of the house, Wasson gave each group of men their positions.  Expecting Holman’s men to come down the valley, twelve men would wait with their horses at the edge of the trees north and south of the ranch house.  The rest would be waiting in the house and the loft of the barn.  If any of Holman’s men tried to come from the back over the mountain, Isi and his braves would meet them with instructions to bring them into the yard of the ranch house.  In the end, Wasson hoped to surround them so that Holman had no choice but to surrender.  Of course, he knew Holman would fight.  Men could be killed.  But once they had Holman in custody, his men would probably surrender or run, and that was all right.  With Holman out of the picture, his men would be nothing more than an inconvenience.

 

Wasson put his best shooters in the second floor windows of the house and the loft of the barn, both front and back.  Those were all of the Cartwrights, Micah, Keith, Mark, and Barney Fuller’s two men.  The rest of the men would be inside on the first floor of the house, just inside the barn doors and behind any other cover afforded around the yard.  Once everyone was in place, they waited.

 

Hoss watched Micah who was particularly vigilant at the window with the best view of the valley. “Hey Adam,” he said quietly as he moved to his brother’s side at another window.  “How d’ya know he won’t just outright shoot Holman without Wasson even havin’ a chance to talk him down?”

 

“I intend to be on the other side of that window with him.  If I see him take aim before Wasson’s out of the way, I’ll stop him.”  Looking down at his feet, he added, “And then I’ll knock him out.”

 

“You oughta just get ‘im away from the winda’ before it all starts.”

 

“Hoss, I have to give him a chance.  He’s the same Micah we’ve always known.  I’m counting on him sending Holman to prison instead of killing him.”

 

“Older Brother, you do realize what your headin’ into if Micah decides to just kill ‘im, don’t ya?”

 

Rubbing his forehead, Adam replied with clenched teeth, “I know, Hoss.  But I have to trust him.  I’m giving him the same chance I’d give you or Joe.”

 

Both men were surprised when it was Micah who announced riders coming across the valley.  “I count maybe twenty,” he said, turning to Adam.  “You should tell the Utes and the others at the barn to expect some up in the mountains.”

 

Adam came to Micah’s side as Hoss shifted to the other side of the window he and Adam  had  shared.  “Hey, they stopped.  What d’ya suppose they’re doin’?”

 

“They’re just trying to figure out what they’re up against.  Remember, they don’t know how many men we brought with us.”

 

“Emmett,” called Holman.  “Take some men north and come in through the trees.  Isaiah, you go south.  We’ll give Saul another fifteen minutes to come around behind.  Then we’re moving in.” Everyone drew their weapons, some pistols, some rifles, while their horses impatiently stomped and fidgeted.

 

In the house, the men watched as Holman sent men up and down the valley.  “He’s thinks he’s going to surround us,” said Adam.  “Let’s hope our men are further out than where Holman’s decide to turn into the trees.”

 

A series of loud yips that made the hair stand up on the back of the necks of Wasson’s posse  came from the mountain at the back of house.

 

Adam ran through the hallway to the other side of the house and looked out.  He could see movement, but it didn’t appear anyone was coming down into the yard.

 

“Adam!”

 

“Do not shoot until they do,” he yelled, running back down the hallway to the front room. He stopped hard against the window jamb next to Micah and looked out.  Holman and his men were just approaching the yard when Holman drew his reins back at the same time he held up his hand for his men to stop.

 

“Randall Holman!  I’m Marshal Warren Wasson!  You’re under arrest for the murder of two Utah Territory Marshals, a posse of ten men and for the kidnapping and subsequent battery of Micah Whitney.”

 

Holman laughed.  “You’re wasting your time Marshal.  You can’t prove any of that.”

 

“Clint Miller gave you up, Holman.  You may not hang for murder, but I can assure you, you’ll wish you had.  Now drop your rifle and step down off your horse.  Tell your men to do the same.”

 

At that moment Holman’s men came into the yard from the north and south, flanking

Wasson and the house from every direction except the back.

 

Wasson watched as Holman’s eyes moved beyond him to the back of the yard, a direction that had only quieted just before Holman came into the yard.

 

“I wouldn’t look for help from there,” said Wasson.  “Your men are either dead, running back to your ranch or bound and gagged.”

 

Holman smiled, sitting back in his saddle confidently.  “You’re surrounded, Marshal. And I’m willing to bet I’ve got the numbers.  So why don’t you and Hutton, or whatever his name is, throw out your guns?”

 

“And what?” Let you kill us without a fight?  Is that what happened with the other two Marshals?”

 

Holman made his second mistake.  He and his men dismounted.  His first mistake was underestimating the friends and family of the man he knew as Mort Williams.

 

The moment Micah recognized Holman at the head of the riders coming into the yard from the valley, his rifle was trained at the center of Holman’s forehead.  When Holman dismounted, his aim changed.

 

Adam watched and while his own hands became moist with nervous anticipation, Micah seemed cool and steady.

 

“Don’t anyone move until we get the signal from Wasson,” said Adam to all the men in the room.

 

Wasson whistled bringing the men who’d gone north and south out into the open.  They made a loose ring around Holman and his men.  “You might as well throw your weapons down, Holman.  Take a look at the house and the barn.  You’re outnumbered.”

 

Holman leaned to the side to see beyond Wasson who had walked forward.

 

“Don’t bother,” said Wasson.  “No one’s coming out of those mountains who isn’t already bound and tied to their horses.”

 

Sweat began to bead on Randall Holman’s forehead as he took a step back all the while wondering how this many men had gotten into his valley without his knowledge.  Several of Holman’s men shot forward, and as they knelt and fired, the men behind them took cover or fell flat on their stomachs.  Two men stayed on their horses in front of Holman to provide cover as he attempted to mount his horse, and while the other men dealt with the firestorm, one shot rang out from a window of the house, catching Holman squarely in the knee, sending him to the ground. Another man pulled him to his feet and began to heft him up on his horse, but another shot among many found its way to his other knee, shattering his kneecap.

 

With Holman down, and his men fast losing the gun battle, Adam took out the two riders to make sure Holman didn’t get away.  He glanced over at Micah who had moved away from the window and slid down the wall, holding his rifle across him with his eyes closed.  He’d been standing there for an hour.  He’d done what he was going to do, and now, he succumbed to the pain with a smile on his face, knowing Holman would never walk, would never move without the same kind of excruciating pain.  He’d be in prison where the medicine was bad, the food was bad, and the living conditions worse.  As he poured laudanum down his throat and let its numbness flow through his body, Micah smiled.  It was enough.

 

Chapter Fifty-Four

 

The small war was over.  Holman was in custody, though seriously injured by a gunshot wound to each knee.  Wasson looked up at the window where Micah Whitney had been positioned as he spoke to Ben.  “The only two shots Holman took were in the knees.  Coulda come from anyone.”

 

“We’ll know more when we find out the caliber of the bullets,” said Ben, following Wasson’s gaze.

 

“It won’t matter.  Most everyone here’s using .44s, Adam and Micah included.  Still, it is odd.”  He turned around to survey the area around him, looking for wounded on both sides.  “Coulda been anybody.  Holman’s alive.  That’s all that counts.  And we’ll keep him alive.”  Pointing to an able-bodied man near the house, he shouted.  “You there.  Ride into town and get the doctor and the sheriff.  Let the sheriff know he’s gonna have a full house.”

 

In the upstairs bedroom, Adam knelt by Micah, rolled his jacket and placed it under Micah’s head, then pulled a blanket over him.  There was no point in saying anything.  Micah was lost to the laudanum for now.  Besides that, he had chosen not to kill Holman, even though he could’ve gotten away with it.  It was a gunfight after all, and Micah had been on the side of the law.  Smiling at his private thoughts, Adam nodded and left Micah to sleep.  He was somewhat relieved that he’d been right, that Micah was no killer.

 

“Hey, Adam.  Give me a hand, will ya?”

 

Adam turned to see Hoss leaning on Keith’s shoulder heading toward his bedroll with a grimace on his face.   He moved a few feet over where he knelt in front of Hoss, carefully pulling the material of his shirt apart.  “How bad is it, Hoss?”

 

Watching as Adam pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket, Hoss winced when Adam pressed it over the wound.  “I guess we’ll know when the doctor gets here, won’t we?” Hoss said, trying to smile, but not quite making it.

 

“That bullet has to come out,” said Adam.  “Keith, tell Pa to send the doctor up here as soon as he’s here, and then bring up some water.”

 

Upon hearing of Hoss’s wound, Ben arrived with the water after telling Keith to get the wounded into the house, the worst upstairs and the minor downstairs and out of the way.  He pulled Adam away from Hoss.   “How bad is it?”

 

Adam wiped his hands on his bandana.  “I don’t think it hit anything important.  There’s not that much blood.  Seems all that extra flesh stopped the bullet, but it still has to come out.”  Looking back at Hoss who had lain down, Adam asked.  “How are the rest?”

 

“Several of Holman’s men are dead, but none of ours.  A lot are wounded,” said Ben. “Once we get everyone sorted out, we’ll talk about a plan to get them home.  Adam, there’s an old buckboard in the barn.  Take a look at it and see if it we can use it for the men who won’t be able to ride.  I’ll stay with Hoss.”

 

“Sure Pa,” Adam answered with a smile.  Moving a hand to his father’s shoulder, he added, “Don’t worry.  He’ll be fine.”

 

***

 

Annie sent one of the older Alder boys to town to get Dr. Martin.  Porter and Bev Alder’s eighth child was coming much too early, and she wanted Dr. Martin there to take care of the baby while she took care of Mrs. Alder.

 

Mrs. Alder was in the final throes of childbirth when Dr. Martin arrived with everything he could possibly need for a premature infant…which was precious little.  He’d already come to terms with the child’s imminent death while on his way.

 

Mrs. Alder had barely made a sound.  The child was so small as to almost fit in one of Annie’s hands.  She didn’t hesitate to pass the baby off to Dr. Martin who took the child into another room while Annie cleaned up.  She kept glancing up at Bev who did nothing more than watch, occasionally offering up a slight smile.  Both women seemed resigned to the fact that the child would die.

 

“Annie,” whispered Mrs. Alder.  “Thank you.  I know there wasn’t anything you could do.”

 

Annie glanced up as she finished her ministrations, washed her hands in a bowl of clean water, then pulled a blanket up over Bev.  She sat on the side of the bed and took Mrs. Alder’s hand, all the ‘if onlies’ spinning in her head.  The truth was, there really wasn’t an ‘if only’ that fit.  Bev had taken care of herself, knowing the possibility of losing the child early.  She had done everything right.  But she was forty-two years old living in a place that had no hospitals that might have been able to extend her time just long enough for the child to survive.  Still, Annie knew Bev would mourn this baby, just like every other child she’d lost.

 

Dr. Martin pulled a chair up to the other side of the bed and took Bev’s other hand, but said nothing.

 

“Is it over?” asked the mother, trying not to choke on her words.

 

“No”, said Dr. Martin.  “I’ve cleaned her up, and she’s breathing on her own, but Beverly…I don’t want you to get your hopes up.  She probably won’t make it through the night.”

 

“A girl,” Bev said, smiling. Turning away, Bev said nothing else while a tear trickled over her nose and down the other side of her face.

 

“I’ll be here, Beverly.  I’ll check on you in a bit.”  Dr. Martin caught Annie’s eyes and nodded toward the door.  He pulled the bedroom door closed and said quietly, “Annie, you’ve done all you can here.  Go home and get some rest.  I’ll deal with Porter.”

 

Annie didn’t argue.  She gathered her things and left, but on the way back to the Ponderosa, she drove the horses into a small grove of trees, tied the reins, hung her head and wept.

 

Shiloh occasionally looked out the front kitchen window as she prepared Abel’s noontime meal.  She glanced back at her son who was sitting on a blanket on the floor playing with some blocks his father had made and painted bright colors.  Of course play was no more than picking them up and either putting the rounded corners in his mouth or tossing them away and watching them bounce on the blanket. When a tossed block hit another, making a wooden clunk, Abel clapped his hands and squealed with delight. He’d then look up at his mother to see if she was watching, and when he discovered she was, he’d wrinkle his nose and laugh.

 

A thought entered her mind, causing her to stop her preparations and turn her head sharply to observe her son.  What if Daniel Slater decides to come after Abel?   The thought upset her so that she dropped her strainer which skittered off the work table to the floor.

 

The sound of a buggy pulling into the yard brought her out of her daze.  She looked out the window to see Annie bringing the buggy to a stop near the front steps of the house.  Wiping her hands on her apron, she went to the kitchen door and waited for Annie to come up the front steps.

 

Though she had managed to smile, Shiloh’s brows curled in concern when face to face with Annie, whose eyes were still red.  Stepping into her, Shiloh hugged her tightly and whispered, “What’s happened?”

 

Annie sniffled.  “Nothing I didn’t expect.  I thought I was prepared.”  Leaning away, Annie took a long look at Shiloh. “Apparently, we can both use some company.”

 

Pushing her bottom lip up, Shiloh nodded.  Both women turned into the kitchen and spent the afternoon discussing their morning.

 

***

 

Joe stopped the buggy well away from the water, helped Etta and Rachel down and walked with them to the water’s edge.

 

Looking out over the lake, Etta said, “It’s beautiful, Joe.  It’s so vast…and…blue.  No wait, it’s emerald green…in places, anyway.”

 

“Some people call it a jewel,” said Joe, crossing his arms and smiling at the view.  “I’ve always thought of it so.   The water sparkles just like sapphires and emeralds.”

 

Etta’s eyes twinkled when she looked up at him.  “Until I met Mrs. Cartwright, I had never seen sapphires or emeralds.”  Looking back at the lake, she asked, “Is it always so calm?”

 

Joe snorted and shook his head.  “Oh no.  The winds can be strong enough up here to bring up waves as big as you’d see on an ocean.  Big enough to capsize a boat.”  At Etta’s widened eyes, he laughed and continued, “But that doesn’t happen too often.  Everyone who lives around the lake knows when a big storm is brewing, you get off the water.”

 

“Have you ever been out in a boat?”

 

“A few times.  It’s the best way to see how clear it is.  From a boat, you can look straight down and see the bottom of the lake a hundred feet down.”

 

Narrowing her eyes, Etta scoffed.  “A hundred feet down.  Really?”

 

“I’m serious,” said Joe with raised brows.  “I’ll just have to take you out one day so you can see for yourself.”

 

Etta blushed, and turned to look for Rachel who had occupied herself collecting rocks on the     shore.  “Rachel, would you like to remove your shoes and put your feet into the water after lunch?”

 

“Yes, please,” the little girl answered excitedly.

 

“Come help me get it ready, then,” said Etta, holding her hand out to her daughter.

 

***

 

Hoss and Micah leaned back against a wall and watched as the doctor moved from one injured man to another, doing what was needed for each before he moved on.  The sheriff of Fountain Green had come and was still speaking with Marshal Wasson and Adam.

 

“I’ll bet that sheriff is fit to be tied wondering what he’s gonna do with all of Holman’s men,” said Hoss.

 

“I’ll bet not,” replied Micah.  “I’m bettin’ Wasson’s telling the sheriff exactly what he’s gonna do, and I wouldn’t put it past him to send for a territorial marshal to take over until things settle down.  Ain’t no way he’s trustin’ a sheriff hand-picked by Holman.”

 

“Yeah, I didn’t think about that,” said Hoss with a smile.  “But why d’ya think Adam has anything to do with it. Wasson pulled him outta here mighty fast when the sheriff rode in.”

 

Micah took a long drink of whiskey right from the bottle.  “I guess we’ll have to wait to find out.”

 

The sheriff had argued that his jail couldn’t hold all of Holman’s men, but Wasson would hear nothing of it.  He glared down at the sheriff for a moment for effect, then turned to Ben.  “Ben, I’ll need you to manage your injured men while Adam and his guards manage Holman and his accomplice.  I can’t see Holman causing much of a fuss considering the pain he’s in, but I’m sure his man will try to escape.”

 

“You ought not be takin’ him back to Virginia City.  With both his knees busted, he’ll never make it,” said the sheriff, half angry, half afraid of Wasson.

 

“Oh, you don’t have to worry about that.  I can assure you, Mr. Cartwright and Mr. Whitney will make sure he gets there alive and able to serve his sentence along with his accomplice in the torture of Mr. Whitney.”  Wasson turned to Adam.  “Holman will be on the wagon with some of the more injured men, including Hoss.  If Micah doesn’t feel like ridin’ his horse, he’ll be on that wagon, too.  That leaves plenty of you to guard it if I take half your men with me to Fountain Green to guard Holman’s men.”

 

Adam raised his chin and narrowed his eyes. “You aren’t going back with us?”

 

Bowing his head, Wasson let out a deep breath before he looked back up.  “I can’t think of anything I’d like more than to get back to my office in Carson City.  But I don’t trust this sheriff not to let Holman’s men out to come after you, so I’ll be taking over in matters of the law in Fountain Green until a territorial marshal can get here.  Until he does, I’m gonna need help.  Besides, I’d rather have Holman in the Virginia City jail considering Virginia City is where he’ll be tried.  And I trust  Roy to keep him there.”

 

“All right,” said Adam.  “If the doctor finishes up this evening, we’ll head out at first light.”

 

While Wasson supervised the rounding up of the men he’d be taking back to Fountain Green, Ben and Adam chose the men who would be going with him.  They could leave for Fountain Green in late afternoon and get there well before dark.  The rest of them would get some sleep before heading home.

 

***

 

By the time Joe brought Etta back to the house, dusk had arrived.  Annie and Shiloh were sitting on the front porch sipping coffee with Abel in his cradle sound asleep when the buggy rolled into the yard.

 

Joe reached up and took a sleeping Rachel in his arms, then waited to make sure Etta got down safely.  As they passed Annie and Shiloh, Joe quietly shushed them and nodded to Rachel.

 

When the adults were back down at the bottom of the stairs, Joe made his move, but without his usual suaveness.  “Miss Etta…”

 

Standing one step above him, she smiled.  “Joe, it’s just Etta.”

 

Opening his mouth, he nodded, then closed it again.  “I’d…uh…I’d like to see you again.  There’s a dance next Friday in town.  Would you go with me?”

 

“Joe,” said Etta, folding her lips.  “Any extra time I have will depend on whether Mrs. Cartwright needs me.”

 

A mischievous smile appeared.  Joe’s eyes moved sharply to one side as his mind whirled.  Gently taking her hands, he said, “You let me worry about that,” then slowly leaned in.

 

Raising a finger to his lips, Etta leaned away.  “Besides being an improper thing to do in my employer’s home, it’s too soon for that.”

 

Joe stopped mid-lean.  “Too soon?”

 

She smiled timidly and held one of his hands in both of hers. “We barely know each other.  I’d like to get to know you better to make sure it’s what we both want. You understand, don’t you?”

 

It wasn’t a frown or a grimace, but Joe’s expression certainly told of his disappointment…and confusion.

 

“Joe, I have a child. You need to think long and hard about that before you get involved, because it’s us you’re getting involved with.  Not just me.”  With Joe looking wounded, she added, “I’ll ask if I can go to the dance with you.”

 

He perked up and smiled, stepped aside and waited for Etta to walk ahead of him to the front porch.  “Mrs. Cartwright, should I start dinner?”

 

Shiloh smiled wearily.  “No thank you, Etta.  Annie and I had a very late lunch.”

 

“Well,” said Annie, “we mostly stared at our late lunch.”

 

“The good news is that one of the men brought a telegram from town,” said Shiloh. “He said it came in just as Samuel was closing. It was from Marshal Wasson. They’re on their way home…with Holman in custody.”

Chapter Fifty-Five

 

The ladies went into town with the children the next day, along with several men who were tasked to ensure their safety wherever they went.  While Annie visited Dr. Martin, Shiloh walked into Chinatown listening to the warnings of the two men who accompanied her.  She finally stopped and faced them.  “Gentlemen, I am grateful for your efforts in keeping me safe, however I’m safer here than in my own home.  I have friends here.  So stop bending my ear, please.”

 

Not waiting for an answer, she spun and continued down the boardwalk, passing smiles and pleasant nods on her way to Kam Lee’s apothecary where he kept his examination rooms in the back.

 

She knocked and waited, and when Tau Lee, Kam Lee’s niece answered the door, Shiloh bowed.  “Tau Lee, it’s been some time since I’ve had the pleasure of seeing you.  How are you?”

 

“I am well, Mrs. Cartlight. But I understand there has been trouble for you.”

 

“I am well and safe.  I’ve come to inquire about Ming Lin.”

 

“Please, come in,” invited Tau Lee, stepping aside and bowing.

 

Shiloh turned to her men, and said, “Wait here, please,” then entered the building.

 

Kam Lee soon appeared, answering the worry in her eyes.  “Ming Lin has Hūnmí.”  When she shook her head, he added, “He does not wake…long sleep.  Dr. Martin would refer to it as coma.”

 

Moving her hand to her mouth, she asked, “Does that mean you don’t know when he’ll wake up?  Or if?”

 

He looked her in the eye and nodded.

 

Turning, her hand remained at her mouth, but balled into a fist.  “Oh, Kam Lee, this is my fault.”

 

Kam Lee did something he would not normally do to a white woman.  He gently laid his hand on her shoulder.  “Mrs. Cartwright.  The fault lies with the man who attacked him.  It is not yours to bear.”

 

She turned and smiled weakly.  “Kam Lee, Ming Lin is a member of our family.  Anything he needs, you shall have.”

 

“Adam Cartwright has chosen well,” he said.  Guiding her to the door, he said, “You should not worry  yourself.  There is nothing that can be done until he awakens.  When he does, I will send word.”

 

“Thank you for taking such good care of him.”  She took his hand in both of hers, gave him a grateful smile, then left with her escorts in her wake, heading straight to Dr. Martin’s surgery.

 

She walked in at the end of Annie and Paul’s conversation, his reassurances that she had done nothing wrong and that her feelings were normal. “I can’t say that you’ll ever get used to losing someone, but you will eventually learn to move on from it more quickly.  That is, unless you decide you can’t.” He took her by her arms and waited for her to look at him.  “Annie, you’re a strong woman.  Give it time.”

 

Once she nodded, Paul turned his attention to Shiloh.  “And how are you doing?”

 

“Oh, you know me.  I’ll deal with it until Adam returns, and then I’ll hide in his arms for a while.”  She didn’t even pause before her next thought.  “Dr. Martin, I just came from Chinatown.  Kam Lee said Ming Lin is in a coma…”

 

“He used that word?”

 

“Not at first, but when he tried to explain what he meant by long sleep, he said coma.”

 

“Well,” said Dr. Martin, “that’s exactly what it is.  We don’t know the damage done to his brain, but generally speaking, the body handles it with a coma.  If his body can heal itself, he will eventually wake up.  If it can’t, he can stay in the coma…for days, weeks…years.”  He watched as the color drained from Shiloh’s face.  “The only thing we can do is wait.”

 

She turned away and rubbed her face.

Standing behind her, Paul continued, “The good news is that Etta and Rachel don’t seem to have any lasting effects. In fact, they’re both handling it better than you.  And Abel seems physically fine.  But is he usually this fussy?”

“He’s developing a temper, but no.  He’s rarely fussy.  I imagine being treated like a sack of potatoes frightened him badly,” Shiloh replied, looking sadly back at her son.  “As far as Rachel and Etta go, they were in my home…in my care.”

“That’s an awful lot to take on your shoulders, young lady. This was not your fault.”

“I was the one he was after,” she said defiantly.

“Then it was his fault, wasn’t it?” She seemed unconvinced. “When do you expect Adam home?”

She smiled slightly. “He’s on his way. I’m not sure, though. A few days…a week.”

“Then I suggest you keep busy until he gets back.” He turned to Annie, then to Etta. “You, too.”

Etta smiled and moved her arm into Shiloh’s. “Oh, we have plenty to do,” said Etta.  “We’re getting Rachel ready for school.”

Moving a hand to Rachel’s head, Dr. Martin smiled down at the child.  “And I’ll bet she’s going to be at the head of the class.”

***

 

A man stood waiting near Sierra House, a way station in Lake Valley.  He stopped pacing when another man on a horse approached him.  “He sang like a bird.  They know who he was working for, and now she’s heavily guarded everywhere she goes.  We won’t be able to get to her.”

 

“Then we’ll have to get to her another way,” said the man who had been pacing. “I’ll be in touch.”

 

The man on the horse, tipped his hat and continued down the road.  Daniel Slater waited for him to round the next corner, then worked his buggy into the hoard of horses and wagons on the road and headed away from  Lake Tahoe and  Virginia City.

 

***

 

Holman’s men were trussed up like hogs off to slaughter when Wasson left for Fountain Green.  Before light the next morning, Holman was in the back of the wagon along with a few of the Ponderosa men who’d sustained wounds.  Hoss chose to ride on the seat, and Micah decided riding his horse would ensure Holman had the best chance of surviving the trip. Holman’s henchman was bound tightly in the back of the wagon as well. He’d get nowhere quick if he decided to run.

 

The trip was uneventful.  There was nothing Holman could do, and his partner was given no chance.  They went straight to Virginia City, to Roy’s jail.  Both men were moved to the cell, and Dr. Martin was sent for to make sure Holman was no worse for wear.

 

“Adam, I need to talk to you before you leave,” said Roy.  “Micah, you need to hear this, too.”

 

Adam crooked his jaw.  “Uh, Roy, I was hoping to get home pretty quick.”

 

“You just sit right down in that chair,” said Roy, pointing at the chairs in front of his desk. You’ll wanna know what’s waitin’ for you.”

 

Sucking in the sides of his mouth, Adam slowly turned and slid down in one of the chairs.  “What is it?”

 

“That fella you and Micah had arrested in San Francisco a while back…that Slater fella…he’s escaped from prison.” Both Adam and Micah sat straight up.  Roy could see the muscles of Adam’s jaw working as his eyes bore into him.  “Seems he paid someone to visit the Lake House and take Shiloh to him.  Only when he got there, the only woman he found was Mrs. Wright.”

 

“Is Etta all right?”  Adam snapped.

 

Holding both of his hands up, Roy replied, “She’s all right…everyone’s all right.  Seems Shiloh managed to convince him to unhand Etta.  She put a hole right through his hat, but before she did that, she fired a signal.  Some of the ranch hands brought him into town, and he sits back there,” said Roy, pointing his thumb over his shoulder, “waiting for someone from the prison to take him back.  But no one seems to know where that Slater fella is, so I’ve got some men watching the house and escorting Shiloh wherever she needs to go, considering how short-handed the ranch is at the moment.”

 

“And no one knows where Daniel Slater is?” asked Micah.

 

“No one’s claiming to have seen him here or anywhere else, for that matter,” confirmed Roy.   “Shiloh asked me to have Robert and Evelyn Slater checked on.  I just got this telegram about an hour ago.”  He shoved it across the desk.

 

Adam read the telegram.  “No one’s seen them for at least a week, and the house is closed up tight.”

 

Micah shrugged.  “Sounds like they packed up and left on their own.  Did Robert say anything about a business trip?”

 

“No,” said Adam.  “He had too much to do in the city to leave.  And he would have let me know where he was going.  The fact he didn’t says he left in a hurry.”

 

“Well, Adam, I don’t know what to tell you other than I’ll send word if I hear anything,” said Roy.

 

Adam stood and waited for Micah to push himself up on his feet.  “Roy,” Adam said, tipping his hat, and walking out the door behind Micah.  The way the sheriff’s office was situated four steps up from the road was a blessing in disguise for Micah as all he had to do was steady himself before he swung a leg over his horse.

 

Shiloh had not slept well for the last week and a half…ever since Daniel Slater’s man had invaded her home, a home where she’d always felt safe, where she’d always considered her child was safe.  She kept busy during the day, but at night after dark, when the house had to quiet down for the children to sleep and there was little to do, she sat and remembered how close they’d come to disaster.

 

Today, after feeding Abel, Shiloh left the baby with Etta who promised to stay inside the house while a man was stationed at the front door, at the kitchen door, and at the top of the road that led into the yard.  Shiloh went down to the stable with a shadow of her own and spent the morning with Tom and Johnny training horses.

 

“These three need a few more weeks of training, and they’ll be ready to sell,” said Shiloh.  “Tom, Johnny, I want you to do the same exercises this afternoon, and continue to do them in the morning and afternoon everyday for the next week.  They need to learn to answer the commands we used today, both verbal and physical, without hesitation.  Cotton will need to be isolated from the stallions.  She’s ready, but I don’t want to breed her until later in the fall.

 

She mounted Spirit to give the mare some exercise, but noticed someone sitting astride a horse at the top of the hill.  The man charged with guarding her noticed, too, his hand instantly moving to his gun and resting there.

 

Chapter Fifty-Six

 

Annie walked out to the front porch when she heard what sounded like a stampede.  She found a wagon and a dozen or more horses coming into the yard.  She saw Ben first and her heart skipped a beat as she looked for Hoss among the horsemen, but didn’t find him.  Finally, when her eyes settled on the wagon, she gulped and ran out.

 

“Hoss!  Hoss, what happened?”

 

Before Hoss could explain, she was in the wagon, stepping over legs until she reached her husband.  She opened his shirt, looked at the blood-stained bandage, then moved her hands to his face.  “Hoss…are you….”

 

“Now don’t you go frettin’.  I’m all right.  I got shot, but it wadn’t even that deep.  There’s a reason I eat like I do,” he said, smiling.  “It’s all natural paddin’.”

 

She lightly slapped his shoulder.  “Don’t you go making light of a gunshot wound.  I’m looking at it just as soon as you’re in the house.”

 

Ben and Adam leaned on the side of the buckboard.  “Annie, the doctor in Fountain Green who removed the bullet said he’d be fine, that it was just a flesh wound,” said Ben.  “And Paul took a look at it when we arrived in Virginia City.”

 

“You went to Virginia City first?” she barked.  “Aren’t we closer to Carson City here?”

 

“We had to drop Holman off at the jail,” said Adam as he helped Ben get the last of the men from the wagon.  Those who rode in on their horses helped them into the bunkhouse.

 

“After Adam helps me out of this wagon, I’ll tell you all about it.”  When she stepped aside, Hoss pushed himself up with his good arm, reached down to hold onto the side of the buckboard and stepped down onto the wheel while Adam steadied his descent to the ground.  “It feels real good to be standing again.”

 

Annie slipped underneath his arm despite the odor that wafted up from him.  “I’ll draw a shallow bath for you.  You shouldn’t immerse that wound quite yet.” She turned him to the house, but stopped and looked back.  “Pa, are you wounded?”

 

“No, just tired.”  Looking around for Hop Sing, he shook his head when he didn’t find him.  His cook usually scurried out of the house as soon as he heard horses come into the yard.  “Would you tell Hop Sing we’re home…and hungry?”

 

She tentatively glanced up at Hoss as she extricated herself from his arm which almost instantly caused his brows to furrow.

 

“Pa, Hop Sing isn’t here,” she said.  “He’s gone to town to check on…Ming Lin.”

 

Stepping slowly forward, Adam asked, “What’s wrong with Ming Lin?”

 

“Daniel Slater tried to take Shiloh.”

 

Taking her by her arms, Adam said, “I know all about Daniel Slater.  But what happened to Ming Ling?”

 

“The man Slater hired broke into the house through the kitchen and hit Ming Lin so hard on the head…he’s in a coma.”

 

Adam spun around and wiped his hand across his chin.  “Roy didn’t say anything about Ming Lin.”  Glancing over his shoulder as he walked briskly to his horse, he added, “Pa, I have to get home.”

 

“What about Micah?” asked Ben.

 

From his saddle, Adam pinched the bridge of his nose.  “Annie, is everyone all right at the house?”

 

“Yes, just shaken up.”

 

Looking down at his father, he said, “I’ll go by the Flying W first and make sure Micah gets settled.”

 

Adam had already turned Sport out of the yard, so Ben yelled, “Send someone back if you need help.”

 

***

 

The guard yelled as Shiloh turned her horse up the hill and kicked her into a run.  The rider at the top of the hill did the same, heading toward her.  When the guard took aim at the man riding down the hill, Johnny moved his hand to the barrel of the guard’s rifle.

 

“You don’t wanna do that,” said Johnny as he pushed the barrel down.  “Are you blind or somethin’?”

 

Snarling, the guard jerked his rifle away from Johnny’s hand and resumed his aim.

 

Johnny stepped in front of him.  “You ain’t from around here, are you?  Don’t you know who that is?”

 

“It’s a man heading toward Mrs. Cartwright.  I’m not to let any strange men near her.”

 

Snorting, Johnny crossed his arms and shifted his weight.  “You don’t suppose she knows him, do you, considering she lit out up the hill to meet him?”

 

By the time Johnny convinced the guard to put his rifle down, Shiloh slowed Spirit enough to ride up beside the horse coming towards her so that the horses were facing the opposite direction.

 

The look in her eyes was all Adam needed to see.  He took her arm and pulled her from her saddle and across his legs, wrapping his arms around her.  For a moment, he just looked at her. Though she was trying to smile, her eyes showed her distress.  Without a word, he kissed her, starting gently, but as she tightened her hold, his kiss became deeper, his need to ease the anguish he saw foremost on his mind.

 

Leaning to one side, Adam grabbed Spirit’s reins, then tightened his other arm around Shiloh and turned Sport toward the house. When they arrived at the front steps, she slid down, taking Spirit’s reins with her.  The two walked their horses to the barn, unsaddled, groomed and fed them.  On the way out, Adam stopped her. Based on what Roy had told him, she had a lot to tell, some of which he knew was frightening, though he didn’t completely understand why she was frightened.  She’d done what she needed to do.

 

“Come ‘ere,” he said softly as he stepped into her and enveloped her in his arms.

 

At first her arms hung limply at her sides, but when Adam move them around him and resumed his hug, she slid her hands up his back and melted into him.  The warmth and strength of his body, his smell, familiar, though pungent from days without bathing, even the feel of his breath on the top of her head and the sound of his heartbeat was soothing. Closing her eyes, she felt his strength flowing into her.

 

“We took Holman to the jail in Virginia City. I spoke to Roy about what happened here.  He said you handled it well.  And I know about Ming Lin.  Is that why you’re so upset?”

 

“Ming Lin is with Kam Lee.  He’s in good hands.  We can’t do anything else, but wait.”

 

“Then what is it?”

 

“Abel.”

 

The hair stood up on the back of his neck.  He moved her away just enough to see her face.  “Is Abel all right?” he asked, his voice strained. Her attempted smile didn’t ease his worry, and he gently squeezed her arms.  “Shiloh?”

 

“The man who tried to take Etta, dropped him to the floor and kicked him away.  But he’s fine, physically.”

 

Adam waited, though impatiently, as Shiloh raised her hand to her mouth.

 

“He doesn’t sleep well, he’s not eating well, he cries when I leave him with Etta, and when I’m with him, he’s clingy.  He won’t let me get more than a few feet away from him.”  Looking up into his eyes, she added, “He’s frightened, Adam.  And I can’t take that fear from him.”

 

Folding his lips into a line, he nodded and took her into his arms again.  “He just needs time, Sweetheart.  And reassurance that nothing’s changed.”

 

By the time they made it into the house, Etta had lunch ready.  When she saw Adam, she scurried back into the kitchen to prepare more.  While they waited, Adam settled down with Abel on the sofa while Shiloh sat and watched from a chair. As he and Abel observed each other, Abel quietly wary, Adam occasionally glanced back at Shiloh. The way she looked at Abel, almost frantically…he began to understand something more was upsetting her than their son’s fears.

 

Just as he opened his mouth to ask what it was, Abel decided he wasn’t happy in this only slightly familiar man’s lap.  First his lip quivered, then his breaths came in small gasps through his mouth.  Tears began to flow before the whimpering began, and when Abel realized this man wasn’t going to let him go, he moved a finger to his mouth and cried.

 

Shiloh had just begun to push herself up from the chair when Adam shook his head and pulled Abel close to him.

 

Abel, however, wanted nothing of it and pushed against his father, twisting his body toward his mother and moving the finger that was once in his mouth outward toward her.

 

When Adam saw the frown of Shiloh’s mouth with brows to match, he said quietly, “He has to become comfortable with me again. He has to know he can trust me, and you coming to his rescue isn’t going to help.”  Answering her doubtful look, he added, “I know you’re scared right now.  But he’s safe with me.  You know that.”

 

She pushed herself out of the chair anyway, but instead of stepping forward, she turned.  “I’ll go help Etta in the kitchen.”  It was all she could do to keep going when Abel squealed, “Mamamamama,” and began to cry in earnest.  Once in the kitchen, she leaned back against the wall and closed her eyes.  “Etta, I don’t know if I can do this, considering what he’s already been through.”

 

“Are you talking about Abel or Mr. Cartwright?”

 

Shiloh cast her eyes upward.  “I was talking about Abel. I have no idea what Adam’s been through.  We haven’t had the chance to talk about his trip, though he knows what happened here.  Sheriff Coffee told him when they dropped Holman off at the jail in Virginia City.”

 

“Then after lunch, I’ll take Abel upstairs for a nap so you and Mr. Cartwright can catch up.”

 

Not much was said during lunch other than Adam thanking Etta for stepping in during Ming Lin’s absence and how good the meal was, especially considering he hadn’t had a home cooked meal since he’d left.

 

Though Shiloh didn’t usually nurse Abel after lunch, she did, hoping that the extra closeness and a full tummy would help him go to sleep.  Indeed, he was asleep when Etta took him upstairs, leaving Adam and Shiloh to talk.  They took their coffee into the sitting room, and while Shiloh initially sat on the sofa, Adam stood, his exterior calmness belying the turmoil inside.

 

After a few minutes of silence, Shiloh was the first to speak.  “Tell me about your trip to find Holman?  You found him, obviously.  How’s Micah…Hoss…your father?”

 

Adam chuckled.  She had so many questions, and there were so many things to tell.  “Micah’s fine, though he’s tired from the pain. He’ll probably sleep the rest of the week.  Pa’s just tired.”  He hesitated, knowing how she would react.  He’d just have to get it out fast.  “Hoss is fine, but…he took a bullet.”  Holding up his hand, he stopped her in mid-rise. “He took a shot to the right side of his belly.  The doctor in Fountain Green dug the bullet out.”

 

She impatiently tilted her head.

 

With a playful glare, he said, “It was just a flesh wound.  He’s a little sore, but that’s it.”

 

“And what about the rest of the men?”

 

“Some were wounded.  The doctor in Fountain Green saw to them all before we left, and Dr. Martin is at the bunkhouse now checking on them.  But there’s nothing life-threatening.  A few of Holman’s men were killed.  The rest are with Wasson in the Fountain Green jail until another territorial marshal can take over there and at Gunnison where Wasson jailed more of Holman’s men.  Holman and the man who helped brand Micah are in Virginia City awaiting trial.  Wasson has requested if they’re convicted, they be sent to Yuma.”

 

“Why Yuma?  Why not Nevada?”

 

“Yuma is harder to get to and harder to break out of.  I doubt any of Holman’s men will try to get him out there, even if he were able.”

 

“Able?”

 

He took a sip of coffee and answered as he studied the dark brown liquid. “Micah shot him in the knees.  He’ll probably never walk again.”  He moved his eyes upward to see her stiffen and bring her hand to her mouth.  It was obvious she was thinking about the reasons and ramifications. “He could have killed him, and though he wouldn’t have been in any trouble with the law if he had since we were under fire, most people would have considered it murder considering he’s known for his accuracy,” said Adam.

 

She remained still, thinking everything through.

 

Realizing she was struggling, he said, “An eye for an eye.”  He still got no reaction.  Shiloh?”  When she slightly nodded with a raised brow, then looked down, he put his coffee cup down on the mantel and went to sit beside her, taking her hands.  “What else is bothering you?”

 

Slipping her hands out of his, she stood and took a few steps away.  “It’s Abel.  And….”

 

Standing and stepping into her back, he bent slightly, moving his arms around her shoulders with his head next to hers.  His voice was quiet and deep.  “And?”

 

“What if Daniel Slater tries to take Abel?” she whispered so softly, he barely heard her, but when she finished, he spun her around and held her tightly against him again, stroking her hair.

 

“Shiloh, I’m not going to let that happen.”  When she said nothing, he asked, “Do you understand me?”

 

Her face was buried in his chest, muffling her voice. “You can’t always be here.  Robert can’t help you with your clients at the moment,” she said, looking up in to his eyes.  “He and Evelyn are missing.  Robbie, too.”

 

Adam closed his eyes as he guided Shiloh’s head back down upon his chest.  “Roy told me about the Slaters.”

 

“What are we going to do?” She moved her hands up in front of her as if she wanted to disappear in his arms where she felt safe.

 

“I don’t know…yet. But as long as we’re all here, we’ll be all right.  You have to believe that.”  He closed his eyes and lay his head on hers.

 

Chapter Fifty-Seven

 

Annie sat at the work table in the kitchen peeling potatoes when Hop Sing entered through the side door.

 

She stopped and smiled.  “How is Ming Lin today?”

 

Hop Sing shook his head and muttered as he continued to his quarters off the back of the kitchen.  “He same.”

 

Raising her voice so he could hear her, she said, “Hop Sing, that’s not a bad thing.  When someone is in a deep sleep like Ming Lin is, the body is able to work more efficiently…”

 

He had come back into the kitchen and now stood before her with his brows curled in question.

 

She smiled. “Uh…works better…it can pay more attention to healing than to doing things.”

 

“You say better for Ming Lin he sleep.  Kam Lee say same thing.  But he not move.  Barely breathe.”

 

She set a half-peeled potato and her knife on the work table, wiped her hands and took his.  “The deep sleep tells Kam Lee and Dr. Martin that the injury was very bad.  But the fact that he’s sleeping is a good sign that his body is using all it’s…oh, what did Kam Lee call it?”  Her face brightened.  “His qi.  All of his qi is working on healing his head.”

 

Hop Sing nodded though he did not smile.  He tied on his apron and began to help Annie peel potatoes.

 

“How Mista Hoss?” asked Hop Sing.

 

Just as the words left his mouth, Hoss barreled into the kitchen.  “Somethin’ smells good.  “What’s for dinner?  I’m s’hungry I could eat a bear all by myself.”  Holding his side, he carefully leaned down and gave his wife a peck on the top of her head.

 

Annie nudged him with her elbow.  “You should get somewhere and be still.  Dinner will be ready when it’s ready.”

 

When Hoss looked at Hop Sing in askance, Hop Sing just drew his mouth into a scowl and nodded curtly, then said something in Cantonese.

 

Annie turned her head to hide her smile, as did Hoss. “Ain’t there somethin’ in here that’ll hold me ’til supper?”

 

Reaching behind her, Annie took an apple out of a bowl sitting on a work table against the wall and handed it to Hoss, who frowned.  “Don’t make faces at it.  It’s good for you.  Now shoo.”

 

***

 

Mother and father stuck their heads in the door of the nursery where Abel lay sleeping in his crib.

 

Etta had been quietly reading to Rachel, but stood, placing her book on the chest of drawers.  She took Rachel’s hand and followed the Cartwrights out of the nursery.  “I think he’s sleeping more soundly tonight than I’ve seen since the trouble.”

 

Rachel edged up to Adam and looked straight up into his face.  Before she said anything, she wrinkled her nose.  “Uncle Adam, where you been?”

 

Looking straight down at her, Adam answered, “I’ve been a long way from here…on business.”  Squatting down, he added,  “How about a hug?”

 

“Uh uh,” said Rachel with an adamant shake of her head.  “You stink.”

 

While Adam bent his head to hide his chuckle, Etta held her breath at the same time she turned red.  “Rachel!”

 

Shiloh laughed and reached down, lightly pinching Rachel’s nose.  “Thank you for watching Abel, Etta,” she said with a reassuring smile and a gentle touch of Etta’s hand. Bending down so she was face to face with Rachel, she added, “I’m going to draw a bath for Uncle Adam right now.”  She leaned in closer to Rachel’s ear.  “He is a bit ripe.”

 

Etta giggled and nodded as she turned to leave the bedroom with Rachel in tow.  The door was almost closed when Shiloh and Adam heard Rachel ask her mother, “Mommy, what does ripe mean?”

 

Still laughing when she turned, Shiloh bumped headlong into Adam who had drawn himself up to his full height and arched one brow.  “Ripe?”

 

She poked him in the stomach with a finger before she stepped around him, saying as she went, “Like a wet diaper that’s sat in the bowl all day.”

 

Adam raised his arm and sniffed.  “Whew,” he said to himself.  “Maybe she’s right.”  It’s not that he wasn’t going to welcome a bath.  He hadn’t had one in awhile, certainly not more than a dampened bandana to wipe his neck and his arm pits. He busied himself undressing as he listened to the large kettle clank on the small stove they used for heating water.  When he built the house, he had placed the copper bathtub he’d ordered from New York right underneath the valve he plumbed from an elevated water tank at the side of the house.  Not only did the large tank catch rain water, Adam also installed a series of pumps that moved water up the hill from the lake and up into the water tank. He heard the cold water splashing into the tub, but knew she wouldn’t let him stick his big toe in until it was perfectly warm.  When he entered the washroom, she had removed her clothes as she always did when she prepared his bath.

 

She donned her drawers and camisole so she wouldn’t get her outer clothes wet when she scrubbed his back and washed his hair.  She scrubbed fairly hard, coaxing his muscles to relax. He had learned soon after their wedding why she appeared to swoon when he brushed her hair or dug his fingers in or clenched a handful in the heat of passion.  He knew she enjoyed watching his mouth drop open and his eyes roll before he closed them when she washed his hair, but he didn’t care if she witnessed that not-so-masculine moment.  It felt too good to hide.

 

Now with every square inch clean, he leaned back, enjoying the warmth as she carefully added hot water to the tub.  “Take them off,” he said.

 

As she put the kettle back on the stove, she said, “Take what off?”  She turned and put her hands on her hips.

 

“Your under things.  Take them off.   The water is nice and warm.”

 

“I’ve had a bath today.”

 

She didn’t see the glint in his eyes when she turned away to clear the soap and washcloth.  She didn’t hear the water swirl as he sat up, moved his hands to either side of her waist and pulled her backwards into the tub.

 

“Adam! What…”  She hit the water, sputtering and flailing, slinging water everywhere before Adam turned her around to face him.  By that time, her under things were wet enough to be almost sheer.  While her jaw dropped and her brows furrowed somewhere between anger and shock, his nostrils flared, his jaw crooked and his eyes gleamed. He didn’t wait for her to voice a reprimand.  He moved his hands to either side of her face, pulled her into him and gazed into her eyes until the anger was replaced by desire. He kissed her as he held her gaze, softly, quickly, and when her fingers found their way into his curls, he pressed his lips against hers again, this time with his eyes closed.  Their kisses left them both breathless and continued as they moved from the wash room to the bedroom, slowly, clumsily, neither willing to let the other go, even much later when their arms tired from holding on so tightly, their heads swam from the intensity, and their entwined bodies lay still.

 

Adam remained motionless until Shiloh’s breathing became deep and steady.  He knew she hadn’t been sleeping well, sometimes staying up all night working on the ledgers for both ranches, paying the bills, preparing the payroll, and not because the work had to be done, but because she was too shaken to sleep.

 

Quietly, he moved away from her, pausing as she moved to her side.  He dressed, then gently lifted Abel from his bed and laid him next to Shiloh. Etta met him at the bottom of the stairs.

 

“Mr. Cartwright, how does it feel…”  She was about to say ‘to be clean again,’ but thought better of it.  “…to be home again.”

 

Adam chuckled.  “You mean clean, don’t you?”

 

“Well, it does feel good to be clean, doesn’t it?” she said, looking away.  “Is Mrs. Cartwright coming down?”

 

“No, she and Abel are both sleeping…soundly, and I didn’t want to disturb them.  She said it had been awhile since either of them had slept well.”  Seeing her disappointed look, he asked, “What is it, Etta?”

 

“Oh, it’s just that Mrs. Cartwright had been helping with Rachel’s lessons.”

 

“Lessons? I don’t understand.  She’s too young for school.”

 

“She’s not that young.  She’ll be six next year.  Mrs. Cartwright thought it would be good if we could prepare her for school.  And it was something that helped keep her busy…Mrs. Cartwright, I mean.”

 

“What was Mrs. Cartwright doing?”

 

“Teaching Rachel her letters and numbers.  And she said Rachel had a musical ear, so Mrs. Cartwright started giving her piano lessons.”

 

“Well, I can’t give her a piano lesson.”  He turned to look up the stairs.  “It would probably give them nightmares if it didn’t wake them up.”  Turning back to Etta, he smiled.  “But I can certainly help her with her letters and numbers.  After all, I did teach Shiloh for a time.”

 

With a pleased smile, Etta clasped her hands in front of her.  “Yes, I know.  Mrs. Cartwright told me all about her experience in school…and how she left.”

 

“Oh, she did, did she?” he asked, sticking his tongue in his cheek.  Clearing his throat, he clapped his hands together.  “Why don’t I collect young Miss Rachel and start her next lesson.”

 

By the time supper was ready, Adam had gone all the way through the alphabet and through some easy addition with Rachel.

 

“Uncle Adam?” Rachel asked from her small desk in the study.

 

Adam looked up.

 

“Baths are good. You don’t stink anymore.”

 

“Yes.  Baths are good.  Don’t you like to bathe?”

 

Rachel shook her head.  “Mommy makes me take a bath before bedtime.  But I’m too tired.”

 

“Well, why don’t you ask if you can take a bath after supper?  Then when it’s bedtime, you can go straight to bed.”

 

“You think Mommy will let me?”

 

“Tell you what,” he said, standing and lifting the little girl up into his arms.  “You’ve done enough here for today.  Why don’t we see if we can find some milk and cookies in the kitchen. And…we can ask your mother if you can take your bath earlier.”

 

Nodding, and then hugging his neck, Rachel said quietly, “It got scary when you not here.”

 

“When you weren’t here.” Leaning his head back to look Rachel in the eye, he replied.  “I’m home.  And I’m not going anywhere anytime soon.  Now, let’s go find those cookies.”

 

***

 

Shiloh came down the stairs barefoot with Abel in her arms.  Her hair was pulled back in a loose pony tail, and she was wearing a robe.  It didn’t surprise her that all was quiet.  Etta would be in the kitchen preparing dinner, and Rachel would be with her.  At the bottom of the stairs, she looked over into the sitting room, and seeing Adam wasn’t there, she went in the opposite direction toward his office.  She stopped short, hearing Adam’s voice drift through the open door.

 

“I have to go to San Francisco to find my partner.  I’d like the two of you to stay on here and make sure my wife and son and Etta and Rachel are safe until I get back.”

 

“Mr. Cartwright, excuse me for saying this, but who’s going to make sure you’re safe,” asked Mark.  “We’ve heard what happened here, and we’ve heard who was behind it.  He’ll be expecting you.”

 

Shiloh bowed her head into her free hand.  He was planning to leave them again, and though she understood how much Adam trusted Mark and Keith, the thought of what Adam might be walking into scared her to death. She moved to the office doorway without making a sound.

 

Adam stood and picked up an unopened envelope from his desk.  “I know that.  But I have to talk to our clients and work out extensions, the most important of which is William Ralston,” he said, waving the letter at Mark.  It was then he noticed Shiloh.  “Sweetheart, I….”

 

“I heard,” she said rather curtly.  “We’re going with you.”

 

Raising a brow at Shiloh, Adam let the letter drop to the desk. “Mark, Keith, would you excuse us for a few minutes?  There’s whiskey and brandy in the cabinet in the sitting room.   Make yourselves comfortable.”

 

Shiloh obstinately cocked her head.  “Gentlemen, there’s no reason for you to leave. Either we will all be going to San Francisco or none of us will go.  It’s that simple.  Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have some arrangements to make.”

 

Adam opened his mouth, and then closed it.  She was gone, and he wasn’t about to have a discussion in front of his employees.

 

Chapter Fifty-Eight

 

Adam opened the door for the two men to exit.  “I’ll be in touch later this evening.”  Mark and Keith both nodded and trotted down the front steps to their horses.

 

Closing the door, Adam leaned a shoulder against it, one leg straight, the other bent and his arms crossed.  He stared at the mirror on the wall in front of him, hoping this wouldn’t turn into an all out fight.  Steeling himself for it, he dropped his arms to his side, turned and headed for the stairs which he took two at a time.  He turned and strode through the open bedroom door where he found Shiloh selecting dresses out of the wardrobe.  Once again, he closed the door and leaned back against it, crossing his arms.

 

Her jaw clenched. Other than that, she didn’t acknowledge his presence until his hand grasped hers around the hanger of a dress.  When he squeezed, she let go and turned away  without looking at him. She knew his face would be kind and…amused…at the same time, and his amusement only heightened her ire.  “Adam, this is no joke, so wipe that amused look off your face.”

 

“You haven’t looked at me.  How do you know what my expression is?”

 

She spun around to face him.  “You’ve been back one day.  You’re son doesn’t know you.  Worse than that, he’s afraid of you.”

 

“Why would he be afraid of me?”

 

“Because it was a man who mistreated him, and you’re a man.”

 

Adam heaved a deep sigh.  “I’m not taking the two of you into the lion’s den.”

 

“But you’re leaving us alone in the forest?”

 

Adam knew she could debate with the best.  Still, he felt heat rise up his neck. “You won’t be alone.  Mark and Keith will be here to guarantee your and Abel’s safety.”

 

“And who’s going to guarantee yours?” she shot back adamantly.

 

They glared at each other in silence for a moment until Adam pinched the bridge of his nose, something she knew was a sign he was just about fed up and making a last effort to calm himself.  Moving to the side of the bed, she plopped down facing away from him.

 

“I have to go, and you are not going with me.”  He leaned against the nursery door jamb and watched his son sleeping peacefully.  “I’ll take Mark and Keith with me and pick some men to guard you while I’m gone. I need to get there fast, so I’ll be riding instead of taking the stage.  I’ll stay in the city, so I can meet with our clients as quickly as possible, and pay a visit to the police chief to find out what they’re doing to find Robert and Evelyn.”  He had snapped out the words, but softened before he finished. “Staying at the house is out of the question. You’d be confined in a hotel room the entire time, so there’s no point in your going.”

 

Bowing her head, her anger was barely controlled.  “You made a promise.  I’m holding you to it, even if I have to take the stage after you leave.”

 

He moved his hands to his hips and glowered at her.  “You won’t be taking the stage if no one will sell you a ticket.”

 

Shooting up off the bed, she stomped over to stand in front of him, her glare stinging.

He couldn’t remember seeing her this angry since they were married.

 

“Adam Cartwright, if you leave us stranded here alone when Abel needs you to be here, don’t be surprised what you find when you get back.  Why is it that your loyalty seems to leave us last?”

 

Folding his lips, he strode to the door. “You knew what you were getting into before you became a Cartwright,” he said quietly without looking at her.  He didn’t wait to hear her response.  He didn’t want to hear her say she was sorry she did.

 

She sat on the bed for a while wishing this would all just go away.  But she knew that was pointless, and there was little she could do to change it.  If it was just her, she could pack a valise and ride out after him, but she certainly couldn’t do that with a baby.

 

Later that evening, Shiloh sat on the sofa listening to Adam as he rattled off everything he had put in place since they last spoke.  “Pa and Micah know everything.  Micah will take care of the Flying W, and Pa will make sure you have everything you need while I’m gone.  As soon as I find anything about Robert and Evelyn, I’ll send a wire. And I’ll send one when I get there and let you know where I’m staying.  If all goes as well as I hope, I shouldn’t be gone more than two weeks, maybe less.”

 

She distractedly fiddled with a small figurine on the side table.

 

“Shiloh, did you hear anything I said?”

 

She stood and headed toward the kitchen, saying only, “Yes,” as she passed him.

 

That afternoon, Etta and been excused to go to town with Joe, and of course, Rachel went with them.  Whenever either Hop Sing or Ming Lin wanted to serve fish, they went fishing, catching enough for both households.  Hop Sing had delivered a large salmon earlier in the day, already cleaned and filleted.  Shiloh had learned to prepare fish the way Adam liked it from Ming Lin.

 

Adam sat at his customary place at the dining table and read the newspaper until dinnertime when Shiloh brought forth side dishes of rice and green beans.  Next, she brought out a loaf of piping hot bread, fresh butter, and last, the salmon prepared as Ming Lin taught her.

 

Once she was seated, Adam said a prayer, then looked over the table.  “Where’s Etta and Rachel?”

 

“Joe invited them to dinner in town.”

 

Moving just his eyes toward her and narrowing them, he asked, “You prepared this?”

 

She’d been frowning since their discussion about his leaving, and she continued to do so now.  Closing her eyes, she said,  “Yes.”

 

Nothing more was said until Adam wiped his mouth and laid his napkin on the table. “That was delicious.”

 

“Thank you,” she aloofly replied as she rose, stacked their plates and silver and left for the kitchen.

 

Adam puckered his lips as he watched her go.  He knew she was angry with him, and she had every right to be. He’d promised her and Rachel both he wouldn’t be going anywhere. But Robert was a good friend, and their business together depended on him.  Adam felt it was his duty to make sure Robert and his family were all right in light of Daniel’s vow of vengeance when they had taken him to the police over a year ago. And because he had no idea what happened to Robert, Adam had to convince their clients their projects would be completed.  If he didn’t, he and Shiloh would be fine, but Robert would have nothing to come back to. He’d just have to make her understand before he left the following morning.  Pushing up from the table, he gathered the leftover dishes and took them into the kitchen.

 

He stopped just inside the doorway and watched Shiloh as she settled Abel onto a pallet after feeding him his last meal of the day.  Next, she tied on an apron and began to pump water into a kettle to warm on the stove for washing dishes.  She didn’t notice him until she turned to retrieve the rest of the dishes on the dining room table, but gave him no more than a glance.

 

“What shall I do with these?” he asked.

 

“Put them next to the wash basin,” she said as she walked past him into the dining room to gather the rest. As she warmed the water and began to wash, he stepped beside her with a drying cloth, and the two washed and dried the dishes and glasses without a word.

 

With the dishes put away, Shiloh lifted Abel from his pallet and left the kitchen, heading for the stairs.

 

Adam moved his hands to his hips.  “Wait…just…a minute.”

 

She stopped without turning around. “I’m going upstairs to put him down for the evening.”

 

Moving quickly to catch up, he grabbed her shoulder and turned her around, then took Abel from her.  “We’ll go upstairs and put him to bed.  And then we will talk!”

 

Both froze when Abel jumped and whimpered.  When he settled back down, Adam continued up the stars.  “If you want to say good night to your son, you’ll have to come with me.”

 

After Adam settled Abel in his bed, and Shiloh kissed the baby, they quietly left the bedroom, leaving the door ajar and went downstairs to the sitting room where Shiloh sat on the sofa, her back stiff, her hands clasped tightly in her lap, and her eyes staring at the cold fireplace.

 

Adam watched her as he paced back and forth in front of her.  It seemed he would have to be the one to break the silence, but he took his time, trying to come up with the one thing that would get a favorable reaction out of her.  “Where is that unshakable woman who came home from college ready to take on the world?”

 

She smirked.  “That unshakable woman, as you call her, came home to run a ranch and to train and sell horses.  That woman hated you.  That woman was never going to have a family to watch struggle, get struck down and eventually die, like hers did.”  She stood and walked to him, glaring up into his eyes.  “Is she really the woman you want?”

 

He held her eyes, his lips slightly parted, his brows furrowed, and his eyes questioning. “Why are you so angry?”

 

She slumped, but chuckled and turned away.  “Am I running the ranch?”  She chuckled a little louder.  “I haven’t sold a horse this year because I don’t have time to train them.  I don’t have time to train them because I have a child I was never going to have, fathered by a man I hated.”  She twirled to face him.  “Now you come home, make love to me, and then announce you’re leaving again.  I don’t know what to feel like most…a whore or a widow!” she barked.

 

The hurt showing on his face calmed her mounting anger, even though she turned away quickly because she didn’t want to calm down. After she took a breath, she stepped away from him before she faced him again.  “You promised not to change me yet I am the woman you made me…with your dreams…”  she quieted, “…and your love.  But I want more than your name.  I want time…with you…and with Abel…with all of us together.  Your son doesn’t know you.  And if we continue to go in the direction we’re going, he’ll remember you as that man who came and left and came and left.  I want more for him.  You owe him that. You owe us that.”

 

He hesitated for a moment, wondering if he’d really made her feel as if she was no more than a women he’d once sought out to quench those physical needs that all men have. He  grasped her hands tightly.  “Don’t ever think that what we have…physically…is anything less than love.”  He held her eyes until she blinked and closed them, then loosened his grip on her hands.  “Now, I know I said things would slow down.  I had hoped that once Holman was caught and the trial finished, we could get settled again here.  I didn’t count on Daniel Slater escaping, and I certainly never imagined Robert and his family could be in danger.”

 

She looked up into his eyes. “Adam, even after you knew all that, you promised you weren’t leaving.  You promised Rachel.  What else could have happened to change that?”

 

“I read the mail!” He sighed and looked down.  He had made promises…commitments…that he wouldn’t be keeping.  Moving a hand to her cheek, he said softly, “Shiloh, I have letters from our clients asking what’s happened to Robert.  Asking if we’re still in business.  I have to give these people reassurances, and I need to do it in person to give them some confidence that we’re still here.  A letter or telegram isn’t going to do it.”

 

She snorted and stepped away.  “That’s an excuse.  You’re going to look for Robert and Evelyn, aren’t you?”

 

Looking at the ceiling and blowing out of his mouth, he first chuckled, then said, “That’s what I get for marrying an unusually bright woman.”

 

“Don’t give me that. I know you better than you’d like to believe.”  Moving her hands to his sides, she shook him.  “You’re a loyal friend.  I think part of me would be disappointed if you didn’t try to find them.  But Adam,” she continued, looking back up into his eyes, “I’m worried about Abel.  It’s been one thing after another.  You have to devote some time to him…some significant time.”

 

“I will.”  He moved his arms around her and hugged her tightly.  “I will.  The last thing I want is for Abel to be afraid of me.  I promise you.   One way or another, I’ll be back in two weeks or less.”

 

Pushing away, she replied, “And what if Daniel decides to come after you?  You might just find Robert and Evelyn, only you’ll be in no position to help.”

 

His eyes cut over to hers.

 

“Oh no you don’t!  Promise me you won’t do anything to get yourself caught,” she barked.

 

His crooked smile gave him away.  Still he gave her assurances. “Sweetheart, that’s why I decided to take Mark and Keith with me after you voiced your concern.  Daniel won’t be able to get near me.”

 

“That’s not what I’m talking about.  Promise me you won’t be the bait to bring him out.”  Her rage was back, her brows curled, her lips pinched tight and her hands balled into fists.

 

Taking her by the arms, he bent to eye level with her and raised both brows.  “I don’t think he wants to catch me.  He wants to hurt me, and that’s why he sent someone for you.  He’s been in prison. He might not even have known we have a son.”

 

“Well, you can bet he knows now. Have you read the Enterprise lately?”

 

“All the more reason you can’t go with me,” he said definitively.  “He’s tried here and failed.  He has to know you’ll be guarded now.  This is the safest place for you and Abel to be.”

 

She frowned and looked away.  For an instant she wished he had never met Robert Slater.  Adam’s plans wouldn’t have been chosen for the courthouse, and he would have continued on his course at the ranch.  No Robert Slater, no Daniel Slater.  Then she closed her eyes.  His hopes and dreams would never be fulfilled.  This was the course they both were on, and there was nothing she could do that would change it.  “I give up.  But mark my words.  Your son doesn’t know what’s going on now.  The only thing he knows is that he doesn’t like you.  As he gets older, he will come to understand that his father is more committed to saving other people than spending time with him, and he will adjust.  At some point, he won’t care whether you’re here or not, and when that happens you will have lost your son.  You need to fix it now, before it’s too late.”

 

His nostrils flared when he realized this was going to end in a stalemate. He made no effort to smile, but rather looked at her with no emotion whatsoever.  “He’s not even a year old.  I  have time to fix it.”  Stepping around her, he walked up the stairs straight-backed, and without looking back, he entered the bedroom and closed the door.

 

Chapter Fifty-Nine

 

Shiloh was sitting listlessly on the sofa when Joe, Etta and Rachel came through the front door.

 

Etta turned and whispered to Joe, “You’d better not come in.  They were having a discussion before we left, and by the looks of things, it continued afterward.”

 

“You mean they were arguing?  What would they be arguing about?” asked Joe, quietly.  “He just got home.”

 

“And he’s leaving again,” whispered Etta as she smiled down at Rachel.  She didn’t want the little girl to know that Uncle Adam was leaving again just yet.

 

Adam heard the buggy pull into the yard and came out of the bedroom and down the stairs.  He didn’t stop until he was at the front door.  Looking down at Rachel, he smiled his most charming smile.  “Did you have a good time in Virginia City tonight?”

 

Rachel looked up with a sparkle in her eyes, and said, “Uh huh.  We ate at a big resterant, and it was good.”

 

“Adam, are you really leaving again?” asked Joe.  “You just got home.”

 

With his smile gone, Adam said, “Yes.  Business.  That’s the way it goes when you own one.”

 

Joe rolled his eyes.  “Excuse me for asking.”  Kissing Etta on the cheek and bending to kiss Rachel on the forehead, he smiled.  “I’ll come by to see you tomorrow when old grouchy isn’t here.”

 

Drawing in a deep breath that filled his chest, Adam glared at his younger brother hard enough that Joe swallowed and said, “I…ah…I was just leaving.”

 

It was an awkward moment for Etta who looked from the front door over to Shiloh sitting as if she’d heard nothing.  “Rachel, it’s been a long day, and it’s late.  Let’s go upstairs and get you ready for bed.”  She grabbed Rachel’s hand and hurried up the stairs.

 

Adam stood where he was and observed Shiloh. She didn’t move.  “Shiloh, it’s late.  Let’s go to bed.”

 

Without looking at him, she furrowed her brow and gave him a definitive, “No.”

 

Crooking his jaw, he glared at her for a moment, said “Fine,” and went back upstairs, leaving Shiloh alone in the sitting room.

 

Meanwhile, Joe had ridden slowly home, trying to understand why Adam would be leaving when he’d just gotten back.  When he arrived at the main house, he walked Cochise into the barn, unsaddled and bedded him down, then strolled into the house.

 

His father was sitting in his familiar place next to the fireplace, smoking a pipe. “Joseph, did you and Etta…and Rachel have a good time town?”

 

As he removed his gun belt and hat, his hand moved up to his head, scratching.  “Pa, did you know Adam was leaving again?”

 

Raising his eyes above his newspaper, Ben took his pipe out of his mouth.  “I know all about it.”

 

“Well, I can tell you just by looking at Shiloh she’s not happy.”

 

“I imagine she wouldn’t be, Joseph, but it’s none of our business.”

 

“Pa, he’s not being fair to her.  I can’t believe you didn’t say something to him about it.  What possible reason could he have for leaving them so soon?”

 

“Joseph, I’ll say this one thing, and this will be the end of it.  Adam has his reasons, reasons I can’t really argue with.  He’s in an impossible situation, and he’s trying to make the best of it.  Believe me.  He’s thought it through.  It’s for the best.”

 

***

 

Adam had spent the last hour packing a valise. He’d need a suit and several clean shirts besides his normal attire, a couple of ties, and his boot brush.  He’d pack his razor and brush in the morning, then get some dried beef and a couple of apples from the kitchen.

 

Once he was finished packing, he walked to the door, put his hand on the door knob…and stopped.  Shiloh was still downstairs.  Just the thought was enough to make him clench his teeth, so he backed up and sat in the rocking chair he’d given her before Abel was born.

 

Crossing one leg over the other, he began to slowly rock back and forth and with each to and fro his anger subsided.  Shiloh was right.  He needed to spend time with Abel.  He needed to spend time with her.  But he couldn’t just walk away from Robert and Evelyn either.

Abel’s whimpers drew him out of his thoughts.  He looked over at the nursery door, and slowly got up, easing around the corner into the nursery.

 

When Abel saw him, he held his breath as his eyes widened and a frown appeared.

 

Adam took a step forward, and Abel turned and rolled away to the corner of his bed.  Pausing in stride, Adam’s mouth opened.  “Abel, it’s Da.”

 

With a huge tear rolling down his cheek, Abel opened his mouth and cried, making Adam begin to feel the truth in Shiloh’s words.  Despite Abel’s protests, his shaking head, and a push that Adam knew would make him proud when Abel had some weight behind it, Adam lifted his son out of the bed, took him back to the chair and rocked him until he was cried out.  The rest of their time was spent looking at each other, Adam lightly pinching Abel’s nose and Abel pushing his father’s hand away while shaking his head.

 

“So when do you forgive me?” Adam asked.

 

Abel frowned and shook his head.  “Mamamamama.”

 

“I know.  She knows exactly what to do to make you feel better, doesn’t she?”

 

Shiloh stirred from the sofa where she had lain down.  She thought she’d heard Abel and sat up to listen, but after waiting silently and hearing nothing, she shook her head thinking she’d just imagined hearing Abel cry.  Turning up the lamp on the side table, she looked at the clock on the mantel.  Three-thirty in the morning.  Adam would be up soon and would be leaving them again. She still wasn’t happy about it.  Part of her wanted to punish him.  But he was right. She knew his need to help others came from deep within him.  She’d known that long before she even liked him, and at the culmination of their tortuous reunion when she came home, it was part of what made her love him. But what of Abel?  What of any other children?  Would he give them the chance to know him or would he keep leaving them to go to someone’s rescue or go convince someone to carry out the law, leaving her to raise their children without him?  How would he feel if she was the one who kept leaving? Resting her face in her hands, she willed the voices in her head to stop.  She was tired of arguing.  Besides that, it was pointless.  His mind was made up, and apparently nothing she said had made a difference.  Taking in a defeated breath, she got up off the sofa and went into the kitchen.  It was still too early to prepare his breakfast, but she could bake.

 

Adam had lain down on the bed with Abel and fallen asleep while he watched his son play with the little cloth doll Ming Lin had given him. Now as both lay sleeping, Abel with Adam’s hand on his tummy, the aroma of Shiloh’s baking began to slowly fill the house, it’s tendrils floating underneath the door and filling the bedroom with its mellow sweetness.

 

Opening the oven door, Shiloh touched the top of a cookie, then took the towel from her shoulder and removed the pan, setting it on top of the stove.  The sound of a throat clearing startled her.

 

“Sorry,” said Adam, smiling.  “You looked…happy…and I didn’t want interrupt.”

 

Her gaze moved from his eyes to the child whose head was laying on his shoulder. “How’d that go?”

 

Raising his brows, he said, “Well…probably like you expected.”  Looking at Abel sleeping, he added softly, “I’m not sure how it’s going to end.  He didn’t wake up when I picked him up.”

 

“You two must have had a long night for him to still be sleeping.  He didn’t have his bedtime milk.”

 

“We stayed up late…talking.”

 

When she snorted, he caught the smile she tried to hide.  “Your breakfast is already on the stove.  It’ll be ready in a few minutes. There’s hot coffee there on the table,” she said pointing to the kitchen table that had already been set for two. “His cradle is in front of the icebox if you want to put him down.”

 

“No.  I’ll hold him.”

 

Once Adam was seated at the table with his breakfast in front of him of eggs, crispy bacon just the way he liked it, fresh biscuits with butter and honey, and a generous helping of fried potatoes, Shiloh reheated his coffee and asked for Abel.  “He’s going to wake up when you start moving around to eat, and he’ll be hungry.  I might as well feed him now while I wait for you to eat.”

 

Adam gave her a quick nod and gently lifted the baby off his shoulder.  Shiloh finished unbuttoning her blouse and took the baby, turning him over.  Before he could complain, his mouth was occupied.  Even so, he cast a wary look at his father as he suckled and seemed to cuddle into his mother more than usual.

 

Shiloh wiped Abel’s chin with the towel draped over her shoulder at about the same time  Adam finished his breakfast.  Rising from her chair, she sat Abel on a pallet on the kitchen floor and placed his blocks in front of him, then went to package dried beef, cookies and apples for Adam.

 

He looked puzzled when she turned and handed him the package, so she explained, “We’re not walking you out.  I don’t want him to see you leave again.  I don’t particularly want to see you leave again either.  But that doesn’t mean I want you to go hungry on the way.”

 

Stepping toward her, he took her arms and pulled her against him, then moved his arms around her waist.  “I don’t want to leave with you angry with me.”

 

She snorted and moved her eyes up toward his.  “The solution to that is pretty simple.  Don’t leave.” Though he tried to contain his own mounting anger, she saw his nostrils flare.  “You just remember this when it’s time for me to leave you behind to fulfill a singing contract on the other side of the country.”

 

“Shiloh, you know it’s different.”

 

“Different?  How so?  Is my work not as important to me as your work is to you?  Or do I not get the same consideration because I’m a woman and a mother?”

 

Bouncing his head from side to side, he replied, “Well, it is generally thought that once a woman becomes a mother, that’s her job!”

 

“Oh, so your promises in the beginning became null and void when the first child came?  You really should go back to New England for a time, Adam.  I dare say you would be enlightened!”  She turned her back to him and crossed her arms.

 

“You’ll feel differently when I get home and things get back to normal.”

 

Without turning, she replied,  “Don’t think for one minute that things will miraculously be normal when you return.  This isn’t over just because you leave.”

 

Drawing his mouth into a tight line, he quietly turned and left the kitchen.  He didn’t hear the apple she threw thump against the kitchen wall.

 

Gathering his things, he didn’t wait to see if she’d change her mind about seeing him out.  He picked up his things off the entry table, first leaving the package she’d prepared for him behind, but slowed on the way to the door and hung his head.  He knew somewhere deep down in that angry mind of hers, she loved him, else should wouldn’t have bothered preparing his breakfast or the package.  He turned and went back for the package, smiling when he lifted it off the table.

 

She had heard him stomping around in the front of the house, but never heard the latch of the door click, so she tiptoed out of the kitchen and peeked around the corner.  Sagging when she saw that his things were gone, she closed her eyes.  He’d left.  Truth be told, the biggest part of her wanted him to take her into his arms and kiss her until she gave in.  But there was the smaller, stronger part that huffed, turned and stormed back into the kitchen where she loudly filled the wash basin with dirty dishes, pots and pans.

 

Rachel slept through it all, but the noise was loud enough to wake Etta, who scuffed into the kitchen yawning.  “Don’t worry about the dishes, Mrs. Cartwright.  I’ll take care of them.”

 

“No you won’t,” Shiloh snapped.  “I dirtied them.  I’ll clean them.”

 

Leaning against the door frame, Etta caught something out of the corner of her eye, slowly turned her head and studied the wet, round spot on the wall with bits of apple stuck in it.  She turned back toward Shiloh and smiled.  “If you don’t mind my saying, I have a bit of advice.  When you love someone the way you love Mr. Cartwright…and he loves you…it will work itself out.”

 

Shiloh raised her head and fumed quietly.  “Perhaps you should finish the dishes, Etta.  And watch Abel.  I’ll be going out for ride.”

 

Etta’s eyes flew open wide.  “But what about Daniel Slater?”

 

Cocking her head, Shiloh’s lips curled into a devious smile.  “That would be one way to get Adam’s attention, wouldn’t it?”  She rolled her eyes at herself.  “But he’s right.  Daniel wouldn’t make another attempt here, knowing how protected we are.  And I will have the escorts Adam arranged last evening with me…if they can keep up.”

 

The two women jumped at the sound of the front door banging against the wall.

 

“Shiloh!”

 

Chapter Sixty

 

When Shiloh’s lips formed a twisted pucker, Etta shook her head.  “I should take Abel upstairs.”

 

“No, you will not take Abel upstairs, but you should probably go up to Rachel.  I’m sure she  heard that.”

 

Etta hurried out of the kitchen as Shiloh went to retrieve Abel from the pallet. Before she could leave the room, Adam was standing in the doorway in a barely controlled rage.

 

He glowered at her for a moment, then put on a closed-mouth smile and clasped his hands in front of him. “You wouldn’t happen to know what’s happened to Sport, would you?”

 

Her mouth dropped open for a moment before her brows creased.  “Sport?  I don’t know what you mean?  Isn’t he in the barn?”

 

His smile changed to folded lips as he nodded.  “Neither is Spirit.  Or any of the other horses?  Where did you take them?  Down to the stables?”

 

With her brows raised, her eyes moved up toward the ceiling.  “Oh, I doubt there are any horses at all in the stables.” She chuckled.  “It’s funny, isn’t it?  I can’t buy a ticket, and you can’t find a horse…anywhere.  Seems we’re both stuck where we are.”  She shoved past him and went into the sitting room, bouncing Abel on her hip and cooing at him.

 

He followed.  “I’m only going to ask you once more.  Where is my horse?”

 

She answered with a clear-eyed glare.  “Perhaps the same place as my ticket.”

 

When his curled brows framed the angry, determined look on his face, she maintained her calm exterior, but inside, her stomach almost leapt out of her throat when he stepped into her and glared down upon her.

 

Abel looked up at his father along with his mother, and seeing what must have seemed frightening, he howled as he buried his face on his mother’s shoulder.

 

Turning away from Adam, Shiloh shushed the baby and stroked his back.

 

Adam took a deep breath and evened his tone.  “Shiloh, I am going out to the pastures, and I am going to take the first rideable horse I find.  If it happens to be Eli or Sampson, so be it.”

 

She spun around with her mouth open, but she grimaced and closed her mouth when Abel looked up at her with his lip quivering.  In a controlled voice she answered, “You cannot take any of my foundation horses.  If one is stolen…” she glared at him, “…and there’s an excellent chance it will be, that will be the end of my horse business.”

 

“Well,” he said, scratching underneath his nose.  “You should have thought about that before you hatched this plan of yours.  You had to know it would only be a temporary delay.  I can always get a horse from the barn at the main house.”

 

“Excellent idea.  And I’ll have someone else buy a ticket,” she said with a brilliant smile.

 

Moving his hands to his temples, Adam rubbed, then took a step back before he walked well around Shiloh and headed up the stairs.  When he returned, Etta was with him. He took Abel from Shiloh’s arms amid the child’s loud protests and passed him to Etta who gave Shiloh an apologetic look before she went back upstairs with Abel.

 

Shiloh crossed her arms and cocked her head, watching as Adam regarded her with his jaw crooked.  “Shiloh,” he breathed, “if you were my daughter, I’d turn you over my knee.”

 

“But I’m not your daughter.  I’m your wife…”

 

“Who’s acting like a willful child!”

 

“Who’s fighting for the relationship between her husband and his son!”

 

“You can’t have everything your way all the time!”

 

“But you can?” she barked between clenched teeth as she tiptoed up to his face.

 

At his point, they were standing nose to nose with angry scowls.  At a rap on the front door, both heads turned, both closed their eyes,  and both breathed deeply.  They stepped away from each other and waited for another knock at the door.  While Shiloh went toward the fireplace, Adam went to answer the door.

 

Adam quickly reached out and caught Robert before he landed on the boards of the porch.  “Shiloh!”

 

Rounding the corner, Shiloh’s hands went to her mouth when she saw Evelyn holding Robbie on one side while trying to keep Robert upright with the other arm.  She looked like she’d been to hell and back.  “Oh my goodness, Evelyn!  What’s happened?”

 

Adam guided Robert to the sofa while Shiloh stepped under Evelyn’s arm, now free of her husband.  The two women made their way to the chair next to the sofa as Robbie clung to his mother, whimpering.

 

“Evelyn, are you hurt?” asked Shiloh as she took Evelyn’s face in her hands checking for wounds or bruises before turning her attention to Evelyn’s arms and hands.

 

“I’m not hurt,” said Evelyn, out of breath.  “Just tired.  But Robert’s wound has started bleeding.  He needs a doctor.”

 

“What wound?” asked Shiloh, turning toward the sofa.  “Adam?”

 

Adam had already found what looked like a gunshot wound in Robert’s side.  It had been bandaged, but was bleeding badly.  “She’s right.  He needs a doctor.”

 

“I’ll be back in a few minutes,” said Shiloh as she ran to the back of the house.

 

It wasn’t long before Adam heard the hoof beats of a horse heading away from the house. His jaw dropped as his head slowly turned toward the front door, and he snorted.  She’d known the horses were close the entire time.

 

The horse had barely come to a stop before Shiloh was off and running toward the main house.  “Annie!  Annie!”

 

Hop Sing, Ben, Annie and Hoss all came running out of the house.  “Annie, Robert and Evelyn are at the house,” said Shiloh quickly.  “Robert’s been shot.  He’s bleeding badly.”

 

“Wait,” ordered Annie as she ran back into the house for her medical bag.  Sticking her head out the front door, she yelled, “Do you have bandages?”

 

“I have a baby.  I have all the bandages you could possibly need!”

 

While Annie was in the house collecting her medical supplies, Hoss and Ben hitched the buggy, and Hoss climbed in ready to leave as soon as Annie was aboard.

 

“Now Hoss, don’t you think you ought to stay here?” asked Ben.  “I can drive Annie over to the other house.”

 

“I’m fine, Pa, but if you want to come, hop on up in the back.”

 

Ben and Hop Sing looked at each other, then both scrambled up into the back seat of the buggy.  When Annie arrived, she handed her bag to Ben, who passed it to Hop Sing, then took Annie’s hand and pulled her up.

 

***

 

Shiloh sat with her elbows on the dining room table, a cup of coffee between them, digging her fingernails into her scalp from above her forehead deep into her hair.

 

Adam sat forward on the sofa, his forearms resting on his thighs and his hands hanging down between his legs as he stared at the empty fireplace.

 

Hop Sing and Etta were in the kitchen preparing a meal while Hoss’s head lolled to the side as he snored in the sitting room chair.  Ben sat in the chair on the other side of the sofa and watched the muscles of Adam’s jaw flex, then watched Shiloh’s fingers lifting her hair, looking from one to the other over and over again.  Their argument must have topped every argument in the past, he thought to himself.

 

Everyone stood when Annie came down the stairs.

 

“Robert will be all right,” she said.  “I gave him something to help him sleep.  Evelyn hasn’t eaten anything for at least the day, so I’ve asked her to come down with Robbie.”

 

“How bad was the wound?” asked Adam quietly.

 

“The wound was deep, and whoever took the bullet out…well, he was no doctor.  He didn’t sew it up, just packed and bandaged it.  Evelyn said they were riding horses.  I believe the rough ride worked the packing out, and because the wound wasn’t closed, it continued to bleed.  He’s lost more blood that he should have, but not enough for him to be in real danger at this point.  He just needs rest.”

 

Moving a hand to his hip, Adam closed his eyes and let out a long breath.

 

“He’ll sleep through the night,” said Annie, stepping beside Adam and placing a hand on his back.  “You can speak with him tomorrow morning.”

 

“Lunch ready,” said Hop Sing, standing beside the kitchen table with Etta behind him placing platters of fried chicken and biscuits on the table.
Annie smiled a genuine thanks.  “We need a few more minutes, Hop Sing.  Mrs. Slater is cleaning up before she comes down.”

 

“It’s all right.  I’m here,” said Evelyn from the stairs, wearing a clean blouse and with every hair on her head in place.

 

Looking up at Evelyn as she slowly came down the stairs, Shiloh asked, “Where’s Robbie?”

 

“He’s sleeping.  He’s been so upset, I didn’t want to wake him.  He needs the rest.”

 

“Well,” said Shiloh.  “Let’s have some lunch.”

 

Etta had gone upstairs to retrieve Rachel, and when they came back down, the little girl stayed close to her mother, but she couldn’t take her eyes off Adam.  When he winked at her, he couldn’t help but notice the quiver of her chin before she buried her face in her mother’s skirts.

 

He pulled Shiloh’s chair out for her and waited, but she silently refused to sit, so he shrugged and moved to his own chair.  It seemed to him that everyone one who regularly resided in this house was angry with him, except maybe Etta…but that could change depending on how upset Rachel was.

 

Etta handed Abel to Shiloh, then sat his bowl of smashed rice and applesauce at her place before she and Rachel assumed their seats.

 

Everyone waited for Adam to say the prayer, but when it was finished, Adam was the only one except for Annie, Hoss and his father who prepared a plate.  He turned to Shiloh.

 

“I’m not really hungry,” she said, answering the question in his eyes.

 

He looked around the table.  “No one here has an excuse not to eat…except maybe Evelyn.  He looked sternly at Shiloh, then Etta, and then Rachel. “Eat.”

 

Feeling the potent tension at the table, Evelyn sat stiffly with her hands resting on her lap. Her eyes caught Shiloh’s who was sitting directly across from her, and for a moment all she saw was a stone wall.  When Shiloh recognized the fright in Evelyn’s eyes, she relaxed and smiled, instantly relieving Evelyn’s tension.

 

“I’ll try, if you’ll try,” said Shiloh, brightening her smile as she nodded at Evelyn.

 

Next, Adam turned his attention to Rachel.  “Rachel, how about after lunch you have another lesson.”

 

Squeezing into her mother’s side, Rachel said nothing.

 

“Etta, perhaps Rachel should eat in the kitchen tonight. She shouldn’t hear what we,” he said, nodding to the rest of the table, “have to discuss.”

 

“Of course, Mr. Cartwright,” answered Etta as she dutifully wiped her mouth and rose from the table.  She took Rachel’s hand and led her into the kitchen.

 

Shiloh leaned close to Adam’s ear. “All that time it took to convince her she and Rachel were part of the family just went up in smoke.”

 

“I’ll talk to both of them later,” he said quietly.  “Evelyn, I hate to bring this up so soon, but the sooner we know what we’re up against, the better it will be for all of us.  Can you tell us what happened?  How was Robert shot, and how did you get here?”

 

Evelyn hadn’t really moved since she’d sat down.  Her posture remained stiff and her hands stayed clasped on her lap.  The only change was a single tear falling down her cheek which she quickly wiped away.  “Robert was alone at the office when he was shot and left for dead.  He’d sent your apprentice on an errand.  If Willis Timmons hadn’t come in, Robert would have bled to death, but Willis took care of the wound as best he could and got Robert to a carriage.  Then they came to our home for Robbie and me.  He took us to your house south of the city, and your caretaker cleaned and bandaged the wound.  A little later, Jim Fischer came by.  He took us to his home where he took care of Robert until he seemed well enough to ride.  Then he sent us here…on our own, dressed as people who work the mines.” She gave a short laugh followed by a quick breath as she looked up and let her tears escape.  “None of us had really ever ridden, so we had no idea what we were doing.  Mr. Fischer said one of our horses knew her way here, to trust her.  But the ride was too much for  Robert.  He started bleeding again.”  Wiping her face, she continued.  “I tried to stop the bleeding with what we had, but he just got worse and worse.”  She laughed again.

 

Neither Shiloh nor Adam knew whether she was just tired or a bit hysterical.

 

“I had all but given up, but…the horse…Speck, he called her…brought us here.”

 

All at the table were speechless as they looked at Shiloh who had tears welling in her eyes.  “Speck,” she whispered.  “Where is she?”

 

“We let her and the other horse into the pasture before we came up to the house.  Robert thought the horse deserved to be…with her friends.”

 

Chapter Sixty-One

 

All those who lived at the main house had gone home.  Among them Hop Sing who complained all the way out the door about no one eating.  Annie checked on Robert one more time, and satisfied he would continue to sleep, she left as well, eager to take care of her own husband who was still recovering from a similar wound.

 

Evelyn slept with Robbie in the room across the hallway from Robert with her door open so she could hear if he called.  She didn’t want to disturb his sleep by moving around his room.

 

Before Etta took Rachel up to bed, Adam asked to speak with both of them…separately.  Rachel stayed behind with Shiloh while Adam invited Etta into his office.

 

“Etta, I apologize.  I never meant to make light of your…position…here, and as far as I’m concerned, that hasn’t changed.”

 

“Thank you, Mr. Cartwright.  But the truth is, I wonder if this is a good place for Rachel to grow up.  I expect some disagreements between you and Mrs. Cartwright, but in addition to that, trouble seems to follow you people everywhere.”

 

Adam rubbed his temples.  “Trouble comes with the territory…literally.  The largest town in a hundred miles is Virginia City, and it’s a pretty rough town.  Besides that, because we own such a large piece of land, have cattle, horses and timber, we’re frequent targets.  But Etta, we pull together and get through it.”  He looked at her to judge if she was really listening to him, and decided she was.  “Rachel can grow up remembering being locked up in a room while her mother works in a saloon or…she can be taught to stand up for herself…her mother…and her family.”

 

“I have no plans to leave unless you let me go,” she said quietly.

 

“I have no intentions of firing you.  You’ve become more to this family that just a nanny.  I want you to understand that.”

 

“And so,” began Etta uncomfortably, “what do we do about Rachel?  She feels you’ve betrayed her.”

 

Adam smiled.  “I have, haven’t I?  Or I almost did.  I’ll have to work on her, but I need you to walk away.  She doesn’t need saving from me.”

 

Etta studied him, thinking long and hard about trusting him to deal with a more than disappointed Rachel.  She nodded slowly.

 

“All right then,” he said.  “I’m not going to try to speak with Rachel tonight.  It’s too late.  If she gets a good night’s sleep, she’ll be easier to talk to in the morning.  Besides that, I have to speak with Shiloh.”

 

Etta rose and headed for the door.  “Excuse me for being frank, Mr. Cartwright, but you need to understand her actions from a woman’s point of view.  She is a mother protecting her son, or so she thinks.  Like a mother bear protects her cubs.  You need to remember she doesn’t need you to take care of them.  I’ve seen with my own eyes that she’s capable of doing that.  The fact that she wants you to be in Abel’s life should count for something. Too many fathers aren’t, at least until their sons can ride a horse, and Abel is far from that.”

 

Adam flared his nostrils.  Etta hadn’t said anything he didn’t already know about Shiloh.  What Etta didn’t know was the Cartwrights were loyal to a fault.  Shiloh was a Cartwright, and he expected her to grow into the name, not only in her ability to take care of herself and their son which she had already done, but also in her loyalty to their friends.

 

When Etta and Adam came out of the office, Etta held her hand out to her daughter, but before Shiloh let Rachel go, she kissed her on the forehead and tweaked her nose, drawing a smile from the little girl.  Rachel kissed Shiloh on the cheek, then ran toward her mother, but stopped short.  She timidly looked at Adam, then asked her mother to come to her with a wave of her hand.  Etta did so and took Rachel’s hand, looked back at Adam and nodded, then guided Rachel up the stairs.

 

As Adam watched them ascend to the second floor, Shiloh walked to his side and crossed her arms.  “She’s more angry than frightened of you.”

 

“Why do you think she’s angry?”

 

“I don’t think she’s angry.  I know.  And she’s angry because you were going to break your promise…and you yelled.”

 

Taking a deep breath, Adam said, “I’m not going to fight with you, so if you can’t talk to me without getting angry, we’ll wait until tomorrow…or whenever you can speak…civilly.  You’re choice.”

 

As Adam walked away toward the sitting room, she asked, “What are you doing?”

 

“I’m getting Abel.  We should turn in.  Everyone will rest better if the house is quiet.”

 

“If that’s what you’re hoping for, I wouldn’t pick him up.  In fact, I wouldn’t approach him.”

 

Adam stopped and turned his head. “Why?”

 

“Because your son is frightened of you.  And angry.  And he has a loud way of saying so.”

 

Twisting his mouth, Adam grudgingly nodded and backed up.

 

Shiloh lifted Abel out of his cradle and carried him up the stairs.  Adam stayed behind and lowered the wicks in the lamps before he followed her up, and by the time he stepped into the bedroom, Abel was in his bed and minutes from letting his eyes stay closed.

 

Shiloh came out of the nursery to find Adam sitting on the side of the bed, waiting.  She scratched her forehead, then walked to her chest of drawers and pulled out a flannel nightgown.
“We need to talk, Shiloh.”

 

“Adam…” she sniffled, “this changes nothing. If the Slaters hadn’t gotten here first you would have left him.”

 

He rose quickly off the bed and walked around to face her.  “And in all likelihood, I’ll leave him again.  You and Abel are safe here.”

 

“And what about Abel?” she asked slowly as she cocked her head.  “He may be safe.  I may be able to protect him.  But I can’t take your place in his life.”

 

His mouth opened and his brows creased.

 

“You will have the most influence on him.  He’s a little boy.  He needs a man to look up to to become a man.  If you aren’t around…”

 

“He’ll have his uncles and his grandfather.”

 

Shiloh shook her head, but her voice was still subdued.  In fact, both were remarkably calm. “How dare you expect someone else to handle your responsibility. They weren’t here when Abel was conceived.  They didn’t accept the responsibility when you and I made our child. Your father and brothers can teach him how to be an honorable man, but they could never take your place.  He’ll always know his father was absent.”

 

Turning, Adam walked toward the French door that looked out over the pastures leading down to the stable.  “Shiloh, I have business interests beyond the confines of this ranch.”

 

“Then you’re going to have to find a balance.  You can’t always choose someone or something over Abel.”

 

“I won’t always have a choice.”

 

She held up her hands as if surrendering.  “I can’t make your son love you, Adam.”  Backing away, she turned just before she reached the washroom door, entered and closed the door behind her.

 

Leaning against the French door jamb, Adam chewed the inside of his cheek.  He knew she was right.  But when it came to life and death, the decision was easy for him.  He’d just have to make sure he had time to spend with his son.  After all, as Abel got older, it would be  easier to explain things.  Still chewing on the inside of his cheek, he frowned, remembering Joe as he grew older.  Joe had developed the ability to reason early on, but he reasoned with a child’s mind, a child’s wants and desires and import.  Even when Joe reached his twentieth birthday, he was still reasoning with something else besides his head. Adam closed his eyes and let his head fall backwards, remembering when he’d left to go to college.  Joe stayed angry at him for a long time, and some of that anger still remained even now. Blowing out of his mouth, he lowered his head into his hand and stroked his temples about the same time Shiloh came out of the washroom.

 

She went to her side of the bed, blew the flame out in the lamp on her night table, then crawled under the cover, staying close to her side of the bed with her back toward Adam’s side.

 

Quietly moving to his side of the bed, he disrobed at the same time he looked at her back.  Tomorrow, he would have to try to convince her he could be the father Abel needed and keep his business interests intact.  But at the moment, he had no idea how he was going to do that.

 

***

 

The next morning, Adam rose before Shiloh and drew himself a bath.  By the time he came out of the washroom, Shiloh was no longer in bed.   He stuck his head in the nursery.  “I’ll be back up by the time he’s finished,” he said, furrowing his brow when Shiloh covered up as she nursed Abel.

 

He found Rachel with Etta in the kitchen.  “Good morning, ladies.  Etta, with your permission, I’d like to take Rachel to for a walk to have that talk.”

 

Rachel had been sitting at the kitchen table with chalk and a chalkboard, but quickly got up and ran to her mother, hiding in the folds of her skirt.  “I don’t want to, Mommy.”

 

Kneeling, Etta pulled Rachel into her arms.  “I would never let anyone hurt you, Rachel.  Mr. Cartwright only wants to speak with you.  Nothing more.”  Rachel pushed closer into her mother, but Etta held her back.  “Now Rachel, weren’t you telling me the other day that you were a big girl?”

 

With tears in her eyes, Rachel nodded.

 

“Well then.  I think if you’ll give Mr. Cartwright a chance, you’ll find it won’t be bad at all.”

 

Rachel sniffled and wiped her nose on her sleeve.  “Do I have to hold his hand?”

 

Adam stepped to one side of the doorway and smiled.  “No, you don’t.  You can walk all by yourself…like a big girl.”

 

Rachel slowly let go of her mother and began walking out of the kitchen.  She moved her eyes up to his as she walked by and gave him a wary look, and once past, she ran to the front door and waited.  She leaned away when he came to the door and leaned over her to open it.

 

Taking tentative steps, Rachel slowly descended the front steps, and once on the ground, she turned toward the horse pastures at the side of the house.

 

As they walked, Adam asked, “Rachel, are you afraid of me?”

 

She bowed her head and kept walking.

 

“I know you’re angry with me for breaking my promise to stay, but are you afraid of me?”

 

“You din’t leave,” she said in her small voice.

 

“No, but I was going to until the Slater’s came to the door.  Do you know where I was going?”

 

Keeping her head bowed, she shook her head, and bent to pick a wildflower.

 

“I was going to find the man and woman who came to our door for help last night because I was afraid someone was going to hurt them.  They’re friends of mine.  Mr. Slater was hurt, but he and his wife managed to get here first.”

 

“But Aunt Shiloh is still mad at you.”

 

He snorted. “She is.  So I have to talk to her, too.  The reason I wanted to talk to you Rachel is to apologize.  Do you know what that means?”

 

Nodding, she said, “It means you sorry.”

 

Squatting down in front of her, he said, “I am sorry, Rachel.”

 

“You scary when you yell.”

 

“Well, I try not to, but…do you know what  the word stubborn means?”

 

The little girl shook her head.

 

“It’s when someone is so set on something they don’t know when to stop fighting about it.”

He looked at her innocent, sweet face.  “And I suppose sometimes they shouldn’t.  But it’s hard for everyone around when two stubborn people believe different things…sometimes they believe the same thing but at different times.”  When Rachel creased her brow, he stopped.  “Rachel, I won’t make any more promises I know I can’t keep.  And I’ll try to keep the yelling down.”  The look on her face let him know it wasn’t going to be this easy.  When he reached for her hand, she drew back.  Taking a breath, he said, “You can go back to your mother now and finish your lesson.”

 

Rachel turned and ran toward the house, but stopped halfway and looked back.  She had thought to go back and kiss his cheek like she’d done before, but decided she wasn’t ready to trust him again.

 

Blowing out of his mouth, he watched her go. “Maybe I’ll have better luck with Shiloh.”

 

Chapter Sixty-Two

 

In the bedroom, Shiloh had finished nursing Abel and sat him in the middle of the bed with his toys while she picked out her clothes for the day.  She really had no idea what the day would bring, but she was sure the Slaters would need clothes.  All they had with them were  rags.  There were no fine dresses or suits in the bundle they arrived with, and Shiloh knew Evelyn would be uncomfortable, probably Robert, too.

 

Shiloh had picked out a dress she could wear to town.  Then she thought that Evelyn didn’t have anything to equal it.  Evelyn was slender, but taller than Shiloh, so none of Shiloh’s clothes would fit her, so she picked out a blouse and riding skirt.  She was just pulling on the skirt when Adam came into the room.  She didn’t greet him, but merely started talking. “If Robert is awake and stronger today, I’m sure Evelyn will want to go to town to get some clothes since all they had with them were…well…not what Evelyn and Robert normally wear.”

 

“We need to hear what Robert has to say before you and Evelyn go anywhere. And  when you go you’ll have some of the men with you until Daniel is caught.”

 

She didn’t respond…just continued to button her riding skirt in the back.

 

“Can I help you with that?” Adam asked hopefully.

 

“No.”

 

Adam nodded at her curt answer.  “You should leave Abel here.  Once Robert is awake and won’t be so disturbed by Abel’s crying, I intend to keep him with me.”

 

She finally turned around.  “I don’t think that’s a good idea.  Abel is liable to make himself sick trying to get away from you.”

 

Narrowing his eyes, he asked, “Well, what would you have me do?”

 

“It would be better for Abel if you spent time with him with me close by.  I can reassure him you aren’t going to eat him for dinner.”

 

“Don’t you think that’s a bit of an exaggeration?”

 

“No, I don’t.  I have no idea what goes through a baby’s mind when he’s that angry and frightened.  Being frightened is one thing, but thrust into a situation without anyone or anything comforting could turn his fright into terror.”  When Adam furrowed his brow and looked away, she added, “You shouldn’t start alone.”

 

He half puckered and looked back at her.  “And what about you?”

 

“What about me?” she asked, raising a brow.

 

“How can we end this?”

 

“I have no idea.  But I can tell you, we’re not going to end it right now.  Probably not even today.”

 

Abel had been watching Adam very closely, and when Shiloh lifted him off the bed, he laid his head on her shoulder and refused to look at his father.

 

“I’m going to see if Evelyn and Robbie are up, and then I’m going to the kitchen to help Etta with breakfast.  You should probably look in on Robert.”

 

Stepping back out of the way, Adam waited for Shiloh to reach the stairs before he started down the hall to the room where Robert slept.  The door had remained ajar all night, so he looked in and quietly called Robert’s name.

 

Robert said nothing, but raised his hand and invited Adam in.

 

Moving a chair next to the bed, Adam sat down, then poured a glass of water and helped Robert take a drink.

 

“What did your doctor say about the hole in my side?” Robert asked in a gravelly voice.

 

“She said…”

 

“She?” he whispered.

 

Adam smiled.  “Yes.  My sister-in-law…Hoss’s wife…is a doctor.  She went to medical school in Pennsylvania.”  The incredulous look on Robert’s face prompted Adam to add, “She’s a good doctor.”  When Robert’s head relaxed on the pillow, Adam continued.  “She said whoever tended the wound before you left San Francisco didn’t stitch it, so it was open even though it was packed.  It looked like the packing and bandage loosened, probably from the ride here.  She cleaned it, sewed you up and rebandaged you…said you lost a good amount of blood and that you’d be weak until your body can replace what you lost, but that you’ll be fine.”

 

In a weak voice, Robert said, “I’m sorry about this, Adam.  Jim Fischer sent us here.  He said this would be the safest place we could be, and I need Evelyn and Robbie to be safe.”

 

Nodding, Adam said, “Jim’s right.  You’re all safe here.  Daniel’s already been here, tried and failed.”

 

“And so you assume it’s Daniel,” said Robert, opening his eyes to see Adam’s reaction, his brows creased and his cheeks sucked in.   “And you’d be right.”  He waited for Adam’s severe look to ease before he continued.  “I’ve never seen the man who shot me.   He came into the office, asked if I was Robert Slater, and when I said ‘yes’, he raised a gun…and shot me. Our apprentice had been there that morning.  I sent Wayne out for supplies, so I was there alone.  I don’t think it was long before Willis Timmons came in and found me.  He told me he’d seen Daniel waiting across the street, and the man who left the office spoke to him before they left together.  Willis came in because he saw Daniel.  We’d discussed earlier that my brother had escaped from prison, and Willis had seen the newspapers.  He also remembered Daniel from when you were first introduced to the foreman when construction started on the courthouse.”

 

“Our sheriff was contacted when Daniel escaped, and he informed Shiloh,” said Adam.  “I was out of town on ranch business.  Before I got home, Daniel had already made an attempt to take Shiloh.”

 

Robert sucked in a breath. “I had no idea.  What happened?”

 

“It wasn’t Daniel. He’d hired a man to take her, only he took the wrong woman.  He took Etta, our nanny, who has a daughter, Rachel.  Rachel and Abel made such a loud ruckus, they drew Shiloh’s attention, and she found this man dragging Etta away from the house.  She signaled for help, then blew the man’s hat off his head.”

 

“She blew…with what?”

 

“A rifle.”  Adam smiled.  “Shot a hole clean through it and knocked it off his head.”

 

Looking at Adam, disbelievingly, Robert said, “I see.”

 

“She’s a good shot with a rifle, Robert.  By the time this happened, the ranch hands who were close enough to hear her signal were here, so the fellow wasn’t going to get away.  He surrendered, and he’s still in the Virginia City jail.”

 

“Did he admit he was working for Daniel?”

 

Adam nodded.  “Yep.”

 

“And what was the reaction when we went missing?”

 

“I have a stack of mail on my desk downstairs asking what’s happened and if we’re still in business,” said Adam, frowning.  “I was on my way to San Francisco to reassure them we’re still here, that their work is being done, and to find you and Evelyn…when Evelyn knocked on the door.”

 

“I hope you weren’t going alone,” said Robert, closing his eyes.

 

Adam could see the strain on Robert’s face and knew he was tiring.  “I wasn’t.  But that’s enough for now.  Rest.  I’m sure Evelyn will be in a few minutes to check on you.”

 

Evelyn came in as Adam was leaving.  “He still looks tired, Evelyn. But last night, Annie said you should try to get him to eat something. She’ll be back to check on him today.”

 

“Thank you, Adam.  Would you let Shiloh know Robbie and I will be down for breakfast in a few minutes?”

 

“Of course,” said Adam as he nodded and turned toward the stairs.

 

Adam found coffee and cups already on the dining room table which meant that Shiloh was in the process of setting it.  He detoured to his office where he flipped through several pieces of paper, selected a few and took them to the table where he dodged Shiloh as he sat down in his chair.  “Evelyn said she’d be down after she looks in on Robert.  And Annie suggested Robert try to eat today.  He still looks tired.”

 

Shiloh turned her head toward him as she leaned over the table.  “Did he say anything about what happened?”

Laying down the papers he was reading, Adam answered while Shiloh resumed setting the table.  “It was Daniel…well…someone hired by Daniel.  Timmons saw the man come out of the office, go across the street and meet Daniel, so there’s no doubt.  We just need to make sure he didn’t follow them here.”

 

“Daniel doesn’t strike me as the type who would dirty his own hands,” said Shiloh.

 

Nodding, Adam said, “I agree.”

 

Etta began bringing platters of food to the table at the same time Evelyn came down the stairs with Robbie.

 

“Evelyn, were you able to get some sleep?” asked Shiloh while Adam stood up from the table.

 

“Some, but Robbie was fussy.”

 

Appearing beside them, Etta asked, “Why don’t I take Master Robbie into the kitchen with the other children?  You can discuss all this without having to mind them.”

 

Evelyn looked at Shiloh who smiled and nodded.  “Etta is very good with children.  She’ll be tending Abel this morning along with her daughter, Rachel.”

 

Hesitating for only a moment, Evelyn nodded and set Robbie’s feet on the floor.  “He’s learning to feed himself, but he’s not very good with a spoon yet.  He mostly uses his fingers.”

 

“Well, we’ll see if we can’t have an eating lesson this morning,” said Etta, smiling.  She took Robbie’s hand and walked slowly into the kitchen as he toddled along next to her.

 

“That’s unusual,” said Evelyn.  “Robbie’s not usually that trusting of strangers, and he’s still quite upset.”

 

“That may not be a bad thing,” said Shiloh.  “Perhaps he feels he’s in a safe place.”

 

Evelyn gave Shiloh a quick, but weary nod before she followed Shiloh’s indicated direction toward a chair on the other side of Adam.  She looked at the extra plates on the table.  “Are we expecting others?”

 

“Annie was going to come by and check on Robert sometime this morning.  I’m betting her husband will come with her,” said Shiloh with a wink.

 

Adam said nothing but chuckled.

 

True to their expectations, Annie and Hoss came through the front door, Annie calling for Shiloh from the entry way.

 

“In here,” said Shiloh. She hadn’t gotten that out before Hoss was already pulling out a chair.

 

Annie and Shiloh shared a brief snicker before Annie excused herself.  “I’m going to look in on Robert first.  Please, don’t wait.  I should only be a few minutes.”

 

They watched as Annie went up the stairs.  “So,” started Shiloh, looking back at Adam, “how do we find out if Daniel or someone he hired followed the Slater’s here?”

 

Reaching for the scrambled eggs, Adam said, “Well, first, I need to speak with Roy.  I’m sure Jim notified the police in San Francisco as soon as he had Robert and Evelyn on their way here.  I’m hoping there’ll be a telegram waiting for me in town.  If the police still don’t know where Daniel is, we’ll just have to live with some rules.”  When Shiloh stiffened, he added, “I know it will be uncomfortable around here for awhile, but we can’t assume he hasn’t sent someone here again.  We’ll all have extra men around us, wherever we go.”

 

“I think that’s reasonable,” said Evelyn who didn’t see Shiloh close her eyes.

 

Shiloh, however offered no dissent.  She knew Adam was right about the danger. “Adam, I need to take Evelyn into town for some new clothes.  They brought nothing with them.”

 

“I’ll take you to town, but we should wait until we know there’s no immediate danger.”

 

“Annie might have somethin’ you can wear, Mrs. Slater, until you can get into town,” said Hoss.

 

Evelyn smiled timidly. “Thank you, Mr….”

 

“Shucks, ma’am.  Most folks just call me Hoss.”

 

Smiling more sincerely, she replied, “It would be nice to have a clean change of clothes.”

 

When Etta came in with more coffee, Hoss’s mouth was full, but that didn’t stop him from speaking.  “Miss Etta, these fried taters are good.  You oughta tell Hop Sing how you cut ’em up so small and thin.”

 

The corner of Adam’s mouth rose.  “Etta, you don’t want to do that.  You’ll be taking your life into your own hands if Hop Sing finds out Hoss likes your cooking better than his.”

 

After pouring Evelyn another cup of coffee, Etta straightened.  “Hop Sing and I frequently discuss our methods of cooking.”  She looked over the table and finding it to her satisfaction, she retreated back to the kitchen.

 

Looking over at Hoss with raised brows, Adam said, “Maybe you’ll get some of these small, fried potatoes in the morning now.”

 

“Naw,” said Hoss as he chewed.  “We got the big uns earlier this morning.”

 

“You mean you’ve already eaten breakfast?”  Evelyn’s eyes were wide as she looked at Hoss’s plate piled high.  Everyone at the table laughed.

 

Annie joined them, but opted for just a cup of coffee and a biscuit with butter and apricot jam.

 

“You’re not eating?” asked Shiloh.  “How’s the sickness?”

 

“I am eating,” answered Annie.  “I had eggs earlier this morning, but I can’t handle the bacon.  Too greasy.”

 

Hoss took another mouthful and kept talking. “Hey, Annie, you think you might have some clothes Mrs. Slater’s size?  She ain’t got much with her, and Adam here thinks they ought to see if Mr. Slater’s brother’s around before Mrs. Slater and Shiloh go to town.”

 

Shaking her head, Annie said, “Don’t speak with your mouth full.”

 

Hoss stopped chewing and gave her a loving glare.  It seemed she’d taken up his father’s causes when he wasn’t around.

 

Looking over at Evelyn, Annie said, I probably do have some clothes you can wear, Mrs. Slater.  And some I won’t need for awhile,” she said, patting her stomach.

 

“Are you with child?” asked Evelyn.

 

“Yes, and I have some dresses and skirts I can’t get buttoned.  You’re welcome to them.”

 

“How wonderful,” said Evelyn excitedly.  “About the child, I mean.  And I appreciate the loan of your clothes.  Hopefully it won’t be too long before we can get into town,” she said, eyeing Adam.

 

“We’ll see,” he said with a smile.  “Annie, how’s Robert?”

 

“I expect him up out of that bed in a few days.  The quicker we can get him on his feet the better.  The stitches still look good, and the redness around the wound has faded considerably.  I think we caught it before infection could take hold.  I’m assuming Mr. Timmons used sugar in the wound.  But Mr. Slater should have some breakfast, even if he doesn’t feel like eating.  He’s more tired than anything, and food will help build his strength.”

 

“Why sugar?” asked Evelyn.  “I’ve never heard of using sugar in a wound.”

 

“Sugar dries the wound and removes the stench associated with infection.  Wounds tend to heal faster with sugar,” said Annie.

 

For the remainder of breakfast, the conversation was split between the women and men.  Hoss asked about the house plans and drew Annie’s attention.

 

“I haven’t had much time to work on them, but now that I’m home, I’ll get to it,” said Adam.  “I can get you the specifications for the foundation fairly soon, so you’ll be able to start the grading and floor joists.  But Hoss, you know if Daniel Slater is around, we’re going to have to find him.”

 

“Older Brother, he don’t sound like the type who’s gonna come ’round here, ‘specially now he knows Shiloh here knows how to handle a gun.”

 

Shiloh quietly laid her fork on her plate and bowed her head in thought before she voiced them.  “Adam, if he tried to kill Robert, why wouldn’t he try to kill you?  Why would he come after me?”

 

“Oh, my dear,” said Evelyn, “I thought Robert had told you, Adam.”

 

When Adam quickly moved his eyes to Shiloh and gritted his teeth, Shiloh cocked her head.  “Told me what?”

Evelyn’s mouth dropped open.  “I…I’m…so…sorry, Adam. I didn’t think.”

 

“It’s all right, Evelyn.  It’s time she knew.”

 

“Well,” continued Evelyn, “do you remember the first time you came to the house?  Daniel was there.  Do you remember how uncomfortable he made you feel?”

 

Shiloh thought back to dinner at the Slater’s house when she met Daniel.  He was forward, so much so that when they were leaving, she had grabbed Adam’s hand as they were saying goodnight.  Suddenly feeling sick at her stomach, she said quietly, “Yes.  I remember.”

 

“He was quite taken with you, as he was with most young women, but he always spoke…fondly…of you after that night,” said Evelyn.  “And then his position in the company changed because of Adam.  It’s no wonder he tried to take you.  He’d want to hurt Adam…as much as possible.”

 

“Evelyn, if Robert was killed, would Daniel have gotten anything?” asked Shiloh.

 

“No.  Robert has made it  impossible for him to inherit any part of the business.  It would be sold…or bought out…and I would get the proceeds.  He retained Mr. Fischer to handle the estate if something does happen.”

 

Adam nodded. “So there’s nothing for him there.  Just vengeance.”

 

Chapter Sixty-Three

 

During breakfast, Etta was startled by a light knock on the glass of the kitchen door.  She spun around, and quickly relaxed when she saw Joe on the other side.  She motioned him in before she sat Abel on his pallet with his toys.  Rachel and Robbie were still working on their oatmeal.  While Rachel easily fed herself, Robbie tried to control his spoon, but often ended up dumping his oats in his lap as his mouth searched for the bowl of the spoon.  Knowing how children learn to eat, Etta had wrapped a towel around him before he started, and so far, he’d managed to move almost half the oatmeal out of the bowl.  It was hard to tell how much was in his stomach.

 

Joe wrinkled his nose at the sight of the ‘oatmeal boy’ before he walked around to the other side of the table and kissed Rachel on the head.  “Good morning,” he said.

 

She looked up at him and smiled with a mouthful of oats, causing him to wince.

 

He moved on to Etta, removed his hat and kissed her on the cheek.  “I see you have your hands full.”

 

“I do, and they’ll be full most of the day.  Mr. Cartwright will be going into town to talk with the sheriff, and if it’s safe, Mrs. Cartwright and Mrs. Slater will be going into town.  I’m sure I’ll have the children.”

 

“How’s Mr. Slater doing?” asked Joe.

 

“Annie says he’ll be all right, but he’s still upstairs in bed.  Joe,” she said, turning to him as she clutched a towel.  The Slaters may be here for awhile.  I won’t be able to go to the Friday dance with you.  In fact, I should probably stay close with a house full.”

 

Joe frowned but nodded.  “I understand. Maybe I’ll just come by to see you when things settle down.”

 

“That would be nice,” said Etta, smiling.

 

***

 

After the breakfast dishes were cleared, Evelyn went upstairs to feed Robert.  Shiloh took Rachel to the music room for her morning piano lesson, and Adam sent for Mark and Keith, then went back to his office to write out several telegrams and letters.

 

“Rachel, do you remember middle C?” asked Shiloh.

 

Rachel put her finger on the key.

 

“Good!  Now, tell me the letters for each key up to the next C.”

 

Sitting there with a finger in her mouth, Rachel just stared at the key she’d pushed.

 

“Come now.  I’ll help,” said Shiloh, and together they touched each white key, saying the name of the key until they reached the next C.  “Now, do you remember that all of these keys are the same.  They’re just at different places.  So, if this key is a C, then what is this one?” she asked, pointing to the next key.

 

Rachel looked at the key she knew as middle C then up to the C at the next octave and said, “D?”

 

“That’s right.  Go ahead.  It’s just like the alphabet,” said Shiloh.

 

Moving one key at a time, Rachel recited all their names, and continued up the next eight keys.

 

“From now on when you touch these keys, I want you to do it like this,” said Shiloh as she showed Rachel when and how to cross her thumb under on the way up, and cross her middle finger over on the way down.  “Now, I want you to practice doing that for a few minutes, and then we’ll go find out what Mommy’s doing.”

 

As Rachel stumbled through the C scale, Shiloh stood at the side of the piano sorting through music.  She jumped when she realized Adam was standing behind her.  “I didn’t hear you come in.”

 

“I didn’t want to interrupt the lesson,” said Adam, smiling down at Rachel.

 

“Rachel,” said Shiloh.  “Do you think you’ll remember that tomorrow?”  When Rachel nodded her head, Shiloh said, “You may go find your mother.  I’ll be along in a few minutes.”

 

Looking warily over at Adam, Rachel scooted off the far side of the bench away from him and stayed close to the wall until she reached the door where she took off in a run.

 

“I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t come in here while Rachel is having a lesson.  She was uncomfortable and got the last scale wrong,” said Shiloh rather stonily.

 

With his head slightly tilted, he matched her cold look.  “I came to tell you I’m on my way to town to send some telegrams and letters and speak to Roy.”

 

“Can’t someone take your telegrams and letters to town for you and ask Roy to come out?” asked Shiloh. “It seems it’s dangerous for all of us.  You should stay here…where it’s safe,” she said with a slight curl of her lip.

 

“I just came to ask where Sport is.”

 

“Why, I would imagine he’s where you left him.”

 

“He wasn’t where I left him the last time I looked.”

 

“I suppose you should look again,” she said with a shrug before she turned and continued sorting through music.

 

He stepped close enough that she could feel him right behind her.  “Shiloh, you pull a stunt like that again, and I’ll give you a tanning you won’t soon forget.”

 

He didn’t see her sneer.  She replaced it with a sultry smile before she turned and stepped into him.  “Promise?” she said, gazing into his eyes with a salacious grin interrupted by her tongue moving slowly over her upper lip.

 

Adams brows slowly went up as his nostrils flared, a conflict between desire and anger smoldering inside him.

 

“Which would you rather have, Adam?  A dutiful daughter…or a wife who will never bore you?” she asked as she traced her finger from his lips, down the cleft of his chin, and down his neck into the hair at the top of his shirt.  “Because you can’t have both.”  Looking up at him with deliciously seductive eyes, she slowly turned and went back to her sorting.

 

Pressing into her back he trapped her against the piano and took her hands, laying them on top of the piano and covering them with his.  He leaned down to her ear.  “Be careful what you start, Shiloh. You might find you don’t like it.”

 

She turned her head and bit his earlobe. “You mean you haven’t taught me everything?”

 

Letting her hands go, he moved away, took a deep breath and puckered his lips, thinking she’d managed to take the teeth out of his threat.  Then again, he thought to himself, there was only one way to find out.  “I’ll be home for lunch,” he said, striding out of the music room.

 

She stood at the door and watched him grab his hat and gun belt. He gave her one long look, a look that was more angry than anything, before he pulled the door closed behind him.

 

Adam Cartwright did, indeed, find his horse in the proper stall in the barn looking well rested and fed.  There was no reason to think Sport wouldn’t have been well-cared for.  Shiloh would never mistreat a horse.  Before he had Sport saddled, Mark and Keith walked into the barn.

 

“Where we headed?” asked Mark.

 

“Town,” replied Adam.  “I have some telegrams and letters to send, and I’ll be stopping by Sheriff Coffee’s office.”

 

Keeping an eye on their surroundings, Mark and Keith rode on either side of Adam all the way into town.  They left him at the sheriff’s office while they took care of the telegrams and mail.

 

“Adam, what brings you to town?” asked Roy.  “You want a cup of coffee?”

 

“Thanks, Roy,” Adam replied as he sank into the chair in front of Roy’s desk.  When Roy sat the coffee cup in front of him, Adam lifted it and took a sip.  His mouth widened as he clenched his teeth at the strength of the thick brew typical of Roy’s coffee-making talents.

 

“Evelyn and Robert Slater arrived at the house last night.”

 

Roy removed his glasses and lowered his arm to his desk.  “They did?  Well, the San Francisco Police have been lookin’ for ’em since they went missing.  And they came all this way?”

 

“Roy, Robert was shot.  The Slaters were taken to Jim Fischer, my attorney, for help, and he sent them here.”

 

Roy shook his head.  “They shouldn’t a come this far, Adam, him bein’ shot. How is he?”

 

“He’ll live.  Annie took care of him.  The Slater’s will be staying, at least until Robert recovers.  But Daniel or someone working for Daniel could have followed them here.”

 

“Now why didn’t he go to the San Francisco Police?” asked Roy with a frown. “They coulda protected him.” He sat back in his chair and clasped his hands in his lap.

 

“Because they didn’t protect him, Roy.  Daniel has help in the city.  He can send someone here, but his options are limited. I’d like you to contact the San Francisco Police to let them know what’s happened.  Daniel’s dangerous, and the sooner he’s caught, the better.”

 

“I’ll do that.  Circuit Judge’ll be here next week.  I’ll need Mrs. Wright and Mrs. Cartwright to come in for the hearing for that fella in the back.”

 

“They’ll be here.”

 

Mark stepped into the office and handed Adam a telegram.  “We’ll be outside waiting,” he said, tipping his hat.  “Sheriff.”

 

Roy nodded, but didn’t smile.  He disliked hired guns, and these two men Adam had on his payroll looked like gunslingers.  But Adam must have trusted them to put Shiloh and Abel in their care, so he wasn’t going to voice his concern.

 

Adam opened the telegram and read it to himself before he tossed it on the desk for Roy to read.

 

“So they think Daniel Slater is still in San Francisco,” said Roy.  “You don’t mind if I keep this, do you?”  Adam shook his head.  “If I hear anything, I’ll send word out to the ranch. In fact, I may just ride out later today and have a look around.”

 

Moving his hat to his head, Adam stood.  “Come by the house for coffee, then.”

 

Roy smiled and nodded as he always enjoyed the hospitality of the Cartwrights.

 

The ride home was uneventful.  Mark, Keith and Adam all agreed it was safe enough for  the ladies to ride into town tomorrow with an escort.

 

***

 

Shiloh and Adam were alone at the table for the noon meal.  Evelyn was eating lunch in the bedroom with Robert who was sitting up at Annie’s insistence.

 

Fall had arrived and with cooler weather lunch was soup and sandwiches.  Shiloh fed Abel broth from her soup bowl and while the baby seemed to savor the new flavors, Shiloh would take a bite herself.  Baby Abel seemed content enough held firmly in his mother’s arms even though his father was sitting almost next to them.

 

“Did Roy know anything else?” asked Shiloh.

 

“He hadn’t heard anything from San Francisco before I showed him the telegram from Jim,” said Adam.  “He was surprised when I told him the Slaters were here.”

 

“I’ll bet he was. Roy doesn’t like it when he doesn’t know things,” she said, smiling down at Abel as she offered him another spoon of broth.

 

Adam watched them as he chewed a bite of his sandwich.  He had rushed her into motherhood, something she had been terrified of, but when the baby had been in danger before he was even born, she fought a courageous battle to save him. She was a good mother, and she was still fighting for him as strongly as she had before.  He couldn’t fault her for that.  It was her tactics he had a problem with.  “I’d like to spend some time with him after lunch…in my office,” said Adam.

 

“Why your office?”

 

“Because if we close the door, we might not disturb Robert and Evelyn.  You know as well as I it’s going to be loud.”

 

She nodded.  “All right.  But if he becomes too upset, I’m going to take him.  In fact, why don’t I hold him while you talk to him…touch him, and then if it goes well, you can hold him.”

 

Adam left the table first and went into the office.  He sat on the edge of his desk waiting for Shiloh and Abel, who walked in several minutes later.  “What took you so long?” he asked impatiently.

 

She smirked.  “It’s only been five minutes.  I had to clean him up.  As much as I aim for his mouth, his tongue has a mind of its own and sometimes pushes his food out and down his chin.”  She bounced Abel and smiled at him.  “Why are you so nervous?”

 

“I’m not nervous.”

 

“Yes, you are.  Are you worried he won’t come around?”

 

Rolling his eyes, he said, “Bring him closer.”

 

The closer she got to Adam, the harder Abel pushed into her.  By the time she was standing in front of Adam, Abel’s face was buried in her neck.

 

Adam moved his hand to Abel’s back drawing a grunt out of the baby.  He squirmed in his mother’s arm trying to eradicate the hand on his back.

 

Moving her lips to his ear, Shiloh whispered, “Abel, it’s just Daddy. Daddy loves you.”

 

Abel raised his head, moved a hand to either side of Shiloh’s face and patted her cheeks while shaking his head and mouthing, “Da ba gu me no no.”

 

“Yes, yes, young man,” she said as she stepped into Adam’s chest with only her arm separating Abel and Adam.

 

“No no,” said Abel insistently, shaking his head with his bottom lip stuck out and tears starting to well in his eyes.”

 

“Enough of this,” Adam said as he took Abel out of Shiloh’s arms.

 

“Adam, this is not what we agreed.”

 

Adam looked at her sternly with one brow arched.  “We won’t get anywhere dancing around the problem.”

 

Abel was now crying.  He reached for his mother, and just as Shiloh was about to take him, Adam moved around the desk and sat in his chair.  When Abel realized his mother wasn’t going to rescue him, he screamed and pushed against Adam, but Adam held him against him and let him cry.  He knew that if it were possible there would be steam rising from Shiloh’s head as she folded her lips and creased her brow.  “Now, why don’t you come over here and rub his back?  Tell him it’s all right.”

 

Despite Shiloh’s efforts, Abel kicked his legs as much as he could while wrapped in Adam’s arms.  The crying slowly subsided to a constant whimper, and soon it was accompanied by Abel rubbing his face back and forth on Adam’s shoulder fighting sleep.  All the while, Adam spoke softly to him and rubbed his back, and continued to do so until his son succumbed to his exhaustion.

 

“Shall I put him down?” asked Shiloh.

 

“No.  I’ll hold him until he wakes.  We’ll see how much he remembers.”

 

“In that case, I’m going down to the stables.  Evelyn was going to keep Robbie upstairs to see his father for awhile.  I have several horses I want to ride to see if they’re ready to sell, and I need to make sure Cotton and my other mares are ready for breeding.  It’s getting close to that time.”

 

“Mark and Keith will be watching you.”

 

She nodded and took a long, concerned look at Abel before she left.  It seemed to her that things were settling down into what would become normal for a time, at least until Daniel Slater was caught or killed.

 

Chapter Sixty-Four

 

Holding Abel against him as the child slept, Adam looked over building specifications and drew with one hand.  He had laid a book on each corner of the plans in order to prevent them from sliding on the desk as he worked.  Finding it impossible to draw a straight line without the use of his other hand to hold a ruler, he finally gave up. He didn’t want to put Abel down.  He wanted to hold the child close, to look upon his innocent face, his flushed cheeks, and his dark curls.  Though he hadn’t shown it outwardly, Adam had missed his son terribly while he was away after Holman. But he had time to make his absence up to Abel, and he knew Abel would eventually come around.  Then his thoughts turned to Shiloh.  The game she was playing could have been dangerous if he had been any other man.  He had to find a way to impress upon her that kind of one-up-man-ship was too risky.  She had to understand when to stop. He’d certainly had every intention of wearing her out, but she had a point. She was his wife, not his daughter and no longer his ward even though she could still be as headstrong as she was at twelve when she left the little school in Virginia City…and sixteen when she left home for the first time to go to college…and twenty-three when she returned home after her father’s death.  How could a man instill discipline in a wife who was much younger than he without destroying the good in what they had?

 

Evelyn had been reading to Robert until both he and Robbie were sound asleep.  She then retired to her bedroom and sat looking out the window at the view of trees as far as the eye could see.  This was the empire Ben Cartwright and his sons had built.  In some ways, she envied Shiloh and her life here in all this beauty.  But in all practical matters, Evelyn knew she would never survive here so far from a civilized city where there were shops, elegance and culture. She’d never wanted for anything.  Her father had been a successful attorney in San Francisco, and so she was born into the lifestyle she preferred, and Robert, now in partnership with Adam could keep her in the manner to which she was accustomed.  She didn’t fault Shiloh her countryside.  Certainly, Adam Cartwright was a wealthy man in his own right, and their home was large and comfortable, but it was the home of a man who enjoyed working outside in fresh mountain air. It lacked the elegance of her own home in the city.

 

After working Cotton, Shiloh rode Lizzy, a four year old mare with pure blood from her foundation stock.  Lizzy’s sire was Eli, and she had inherited Eli’s regal lines. Shiloh was looking for the perfect white stallion to breed with Lizzy in the search for the combination that would produce a white horse equal in beauty and temperament to her black horses, just as she planned for Cotton bred with Eli.

 

While riding, she could forget about the turmoil of the last few days, if only for awhile.  It was a short-lived respite.  Mark called out to her as she rode into the pasture on the lake side of the stables.

 

“Mrs. Cartwright, if you wouldn’t mind, I’d appreciate it if you’d stay in the center pasture.”

 

She stopped the horse and let her head fall forward.  Somehow, he’d stolen her moment of joy.  She knew it wasn’t his fault.  He was doing his job.  But how she wished she could open the gate and ride across the open fields where because of her horse’s smooth gait, she could easily imagine she was atop a winged horse flying among the clouds.  Turning the horse toward the stable, she walked Lizzy in, savoring every minute on the mare’s back.  She wasn’t looking forward to going back to the house, sure that Adam wasn’t finished with her.

 

Things were quiet in the Cartwright house when Shiloh returned from the stables.  Pleased with the progress the horses had made, she began going over in her mind the letters that would be sent to those who had inquired, asking them to come to Virginia City to select their steed.  Her thoughts were interrupted by Etta’s voice as she spoke to Rachel in the kitchen.  Other than that, there were no sounds. Quietly closing the door, she tiptoed across the wooden floor to the stairs, but was brought to a halt.

 

“Shiloh.”

 

She closed her eyes.  His voice was deep, quiet…soothing.  Folding her lips, she slowly turned.  “Yes?”

 

“I’ve spoken to everyone I needed to except you,” he said.  He’d been standing half out of the office door, and now when he came all the way out, she saw her baby still on his shoulder.  Abel’s eyes were open, but he was quiet.

 

She guessed he’d just awakened.  “I should take him upstairs.  I usually nurse him after his nap.”

 

“I’ll go up with you.”

 

She hesitated, nodded, then turned and walked up the stairs with Adam following. In the bedroom, she disrobed, something she would have done anyway after riding the horses, then pulled on her robe and settled in her rocking chair.

 

Abel moved a finger to his mouth and started whimpering when he realized who was holding him. When Adam kissed him, the boy said, “No!”, while shaking his head and turning away at the same time he drew his arms and legs up until he was in a ball, crying quietly for his mother.

 

Adam gently passed the little ball to Shiloh where Abel unfolded and continued to whimper on his mother’s shoulder.

 

She cooed at him and moved him into her arms so that he could nurse.  At first, he just cried, but after a few minutes, he latched on and settled down.

 

Adam sat quietly on the bed watching a scene that had become one of his most favorite.  The way Shiloh and Abel looked at one another was calming, satisfying and beautiful all at once, like a painting one could admire for hours.

 

Abel wasn’t that hungry, so Shiloh pulled her robe up, lifted the baby to her shoulder, and while rubbing his back, she left the bedroom to call Etta.  When she returned to the bedroom, she was alone.  She went back to the rocking chair and sat across from Adam who was still sitting on the end of the bed.  For several minutes, they were both quiet.

 

“Can you and I have discussion without it deteriorating into an argument?” asked Adam.

 

“I honestly don’t know.”  There was no tension, no anger…little emotion in her statement.

 

Taking a deep breath, Adam nodded.  “We will not have another argument like the one we’ve just had.  If it starts, I will do whatever is necessary to end it.”

 

She tensed, but said nothing.

 

“Shiloh, I have a responsibility to this family.  That includes you and Abel, but it also includes Etta, Rachel, Pa, Hoss and Annie and Joe.  I intend to do what is necessary to ensure you have a roof over your head, food in your stomach and that you continue to enjoy the things you do…the horses and your music.  And that means I will be leaving home from time to time, either for work or to deal with trouble.  That has always extended to our friends, and it isn’t going to change.”

 

“Abel should be your first priority.”

 

“No, he shouldn’t.”

 

When her nostrils flared, he held his finger up to stop her dissent.  “Whoever needs me the most at the time is my priority.  When it’s all equal, you…” he softened his brow and his voice. “You, my love, are my first priority. After you comes our children.”

 

Anxiously, she replied, “Adam, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if you saved me over one of our children.”

 

“I understand,” he said quietly.  “A decision like this isn’t easy…choosing one of you over the other.  But what if I couldn’t make the choice at all until it was too late for both of you?  And how do you think our child would feel, knowing he was saved and his mother wasn’t?”  He studied her to see if she was beginning to comprehend.  “I made the choice when we were married.  You need to decide what you will do as well.”

 

“What happens when I need to leave?” she asked softly, looking out the French doors.

 

“The best situation would be that we go together.  But I will never take you into harm’s way.  There’s no one I trust more with your safety, besides myself, than my family.”

 

She looked back at him. “What happens when we have commitments in opposite directions?”

 

“If you mean Virginia City…”

 

“I mean Boston.”

 

Adam’s brow creased.  “Boston?”

 

“I’ve been asked to perform in Boston.”

 

He wiped his hand across his mouth. “At the moment, it’s out of the question.”

 

She stood and looked out at her horses in the pastures near the stables.  “When then?”

 

“You know I can’t answer that right now.”   He expected her to lash out at him, but she didn’t.  From his viewpoint looking at her back, there was no sign of anger at all.  When she quietly left the room, he didn’t go after her.  The expression on her face was certainly a intense one, but it was more contemplative than angry.  Instead he went to his office to work, taking advantage of the quiet house.  He had no idea how much time had passed when Etta came into the office with the coffee service.

 

“Mr. Cartwright, would you like a cup of coffee?  It’s freshly brewed.”

 

Laying his pencil down on his desk, he smiled.  “That would be nice.  Thank you.”  He waited for her to pour his cup, then asked, “Have you seen Mrs. Cartwright?”

 

“She came into the kitchen a little while ago for Abel,” said Etta as she offered Adam the sugar bowl.  “They went out to the summerhouse.”

 

“Did she have one of the men with her?” he asked while shoveling several spoons of sugar into his coffee.

 

“She didn’t ask for one, but I saw one of them walk around the house.  He stayed at the corner where he could see her.  Shall I tell her you’re looking for her?”

 

“Thank you, Etta, but no.  Let her be.”

 

Shiloh sat on a bench in the summerhouse with Abel sitting quietly on her lap.  The season was quickly changing to fall, the days mild and the evenings becoming quite chilly.  The mountains, mostly evergreen pine, were dotted with hints of color here and there, and the lake, though still emerald and sapphire, seemed dull.  The sun still glistened on the surface, but a cool wind blew across the water turning the summer’s smooth, glass-like plane into something more coarse.  Shiloh sighed. Fall brought out her melancholy with the flowers dying, trees trying to hang on to life with their green leaves turning to red or yellow, then orange…then brown, until finally they stood bare…naked and cold.

 

Abel leaned back against his mother and looked up at her.  Somehow he felt his mother’s thoughts were not necessarily happy ones.  There was no brightness about her face.

 

Before Shiloh left home for college, she had no idea what she wanted.  It took only one year for those ladies who had befriended all the girls at Vassar to convince her that her options were open…to give her an idea of what she didn’t want and what she did.  At the time, what she didn’t want was to be burdened by the limits marriage would place on her.  She didn’t want to be chattel.  She didn’t want to be ruled by any man.  For a time she had forgotten how much her mother had loved her father and was happy to take care of him.  But her mother was raised in the genteel South were women had their place.

 

Though Shiloh was born in the South, she was definitely not a genteel Southern woman, and because her mother died when she was very young, she had no women in her youth to hammer her womanly duties into her.  And then Adam sent her to that school, to that Headmistress who had those friends.

 

Yet here she sat struggling with those feelings, those beliefs, those aspirations.

 

She had married a man who expected a great deal out of her, who had given her room to be what she wanted to be…as long as she made time for him…and children.  She smiled down at Abel, who instantly gave her a toothless grin.

 

She knew the kind of man Adam was when she’d married him. He was confident, a man who was in control of his present and his future, and who would do great things.  And she believed him when he said she could continue to perform and train horses.  What he didn’t say was that she would be surrendering a large part of her independence…to him.  He would have the last say.  Now, he’d given her even more to consider…things she didn’t want to think about.  Even so, she knew he was right.  If something happened, and she had to make the choice between Adam and their child, what would she do?   Would she be able to make that decision on the spot?  No, of course not.  Either way, she’d feel the loss just as strongly.

 

She looked down at Abel and touched his nose with a fingertip, drawing a grunted laugh out of him, then brought him up to her face where she touched his forehead with hers and kissed him.

 

She’d married Adam, and she’d given birth to his son.  Now, she sat wondering if she had it all to do over again, what she would do.

 

***

 

The door to Adam’s office was open.  Shiloh leaned against the door frame and watched as Adam worked on what could be plans for any number of buildings.

 

He stopped his pencil mid-line because of a niggling feeling that someone was watching him.  When he looked up, he laid the pencil on the drawing without taking his eyes off of her.  “How long have you been watching me?”

 

“Oh, about ten minutes.”

 

“Where’s Abel?”

 

“With Etta.  Do you know you make faces when you draw?”

 

He smiled.  “I do?”  The house was silent once more as he waited for her.  When she’d left the bedroom, he knew she needed time to think, and now, she needed to collect her thoughts…or her nerve…or both, maybe.  She’d speak when she was ready, and he’d give her all the time she needed.

 

She took a step into the office.  “Adam…”

 

Still, he said nothing, waiting.

 

“I’ve been thinking…back…when you sent me to college.  I was so sure by the time I came home I would never marry or have children because marriage and children would eliminate my independence.”  She shrugged nervously.  “In some ways, it has.  Until I married you, I had always done what I wanted without much resistance.  Daddy put very few restrictions on me, and those he did, I didn’t care about.  I was fine as long as I could roam.  Miss Henderson at Vassar also put a few restrictions on me, but I was so focused on making Daddy proud of me…again, those were restrictions that didn’t matter to me.  Then when I sang, people were telling me I could do anything…be anything I wanted to be…as long as it was a composer or singer. And that was fine because that’s exactly what I wanted to be…until Daddy died, and then I wanted to continue his…legacy.  The horses.”

 

Adam moved his elbow to his desk and propped his chin in his hand, content to listen.

 

“A question came to my mind a little while ago.   If I had it to do all over again, what would I do?”  She looked up at him to see his reaction.

 

His brow furrowed as he frowned. “Shiloh…do you want to end this marriage?”

 

Now, she looked him square in the eye and without hesitation, she said, “No.”

 

“Come ‘ere.”

 

She did, and when she was close enough for him to reach, he moved her onto his lap.  “Go on.”

 

“Adam, that need for independence is still in me, and sometimes I think back to that time in college and can feel it slipping away.  I suppose that fear is unfounded, because when I looked down at Abel and that little boy smiled back up at me, I knew I was exactly where I’m supposed to be.”  Looking into Adam’s eyes, she said, “I’m sorry.  I shouldn’t have tried to stop you from going…from being who you are.”   Moving her hands to his face, she kissed him, and he was content to just let her.

 

“Sweetheart, no marriage is perfect.  They’re made of two different people.  And I don’t want you to lose the independence you have.  I know Abel has temporarily taken some of that, but that won’t always be the case.” When she looked away, he  moved a finger under her chin and turned her face back to his.  “We will do the best we can with the cards we’re dealt.”

 

Chapter Sixty-Five

 

Abel lay in the middle of the bed as his mother changed his diaper.  Adam watched from a distance until the diaper was in place, and when Shiloh lifted Abel into her arms, Adam moved in behind her, enveloping them both in his arms.

 

Abel’s eyes grew wide, his mouth opened in uncertainty.  He looked down at his mother, then again at his father, but his expression didn’t change.  When Shiloh touched his nose, Abel laughed, but when Adam did the same, Abel’s eyes widened and his mouth opened again.

 

Maintaining her smile at Abel, Shiloh said, “It’s not working.”

 

“Sure it is.  He’s not crying this time,” said Adam.  “Give him here.  I have an idea.”

 

With his hands holding Abel under the child’s arms, Adam lifted him up over his head.

 

Abel sputtered and held his hand out, grabbing for his mother.  “Mamamama.”

 

“Da,” said Adam as he brought the baby’s stomach to his lips and blew.

 

Looking over at his mother, Abel’s face held that same open-mouthed doubt.

 

Shiloh took the baby from  Adam.  “He’s not crying.  That’s good.”

 

“He didn’t laugh either,” said Adam. ”He always laughed when I blew on his stomach.”

 

Heading toward the nursery, Shiloh said, “You should consider yourself lucky.  He’s already had his bedtime meal.  It could have ended up all over your face.”

 

He heard her laughing as he joined her in the nursery, and came in feigning laughter.  “I’ll put him down,” Adam said, taking Abel again, laying him in his bed, and tickling his stomach.

 

Abel grunted…and laughed, but only for a moment.  He furrowed his brow and pushed his father’s hands away.

 

Adam, however was persistent and tickled him again, this time drawing smile and a squeal that seemed to surprise even Abel.  “I’ll take it,” said Adam triumphantly before he stepped aside for Shiloh to say good night to her son.

 

When Shiloh left the nursery, Adam closed the door behind her, something unusual as they always left the door ajar.  He followed her to her dressing table where she removed her ring, her necklace, and began to unbutton her blouse.

 

Taking her hands and moving them to her side, Adam took over the task of unbuttoning her blouse, and once that was done, he moved to her skirt, letting it drop to the floor.  Next, he took her hand and worked the buttons on her cuffs, then pushed the blouse down her arms, allowing it to drop.  He followed with her corset, her chemise, her camisole and her drawers until she was wearing nothing but a smile…and the ribbon in her hair which he carefully plucked to let her hair escape it’s bindings and fall over her shoulders.

 

Leaning into her, he buried his face in her hair, breathing in the scent of roses from the rose oil she used in her bath.  Turning her around, he pulled her against him and kissed her.  As he finished his kiss and looked down upon her with a smile, his hand quickly smacked her bare backside before she knew what was happening.

 

“Ow!  What was that for?” she exclaimed, pushing against him.

 

He held her firmly against him, moving her hands behind her back and holding them there in one hand while his other hand smacked her several times.

Now, she was wriggling sideways trying to wrench her hands loose as she attempted to protected her fanny.  “Adam!”

 

“Ssh.  You’ll wake the baby…and the house.  You don’t want them to hear this, do you?”

 

Growling, she stopped struggling, but opened her hands over her butt.  “Seems you’ve decided what you want out of our marriage…a daughter instead of a wife!” she half whispered, half yelled.

 

“Now, wait a minute,” he said calmly.  “You asked for this.”

 

“Wha…what are you talking about?”

 

“You asked me to promise, remember?”  He couldn’t stop his laughter from erupting when her eyes opened wide right along with her mouth…just like Abel had done before they put him to bed.

 

“I…ah…I didn’t….”  Her teeth clenched as she winced.

 

“You were also interested in learning more, so I thought I’d oblige.”  He released her hands, but moved her to the bed, straddling her as he disrobed.

 

With his weight on her, she struggled, though it was pointless. She finally lay tense and quiet even though she was a bit frightened.  Still, asking him to stop would mean admitting her ruse was just that. Sucking in a quiet breath, she held it as his hands moved over her, touching her in places and in ways that always aroused her, leaving her breathless even though she felt trapped. Then he flipped her over on her stomach as if she weighed nothing. At some point, she forgot the helpless feeling as he moved her this way and that, leaving  her at the brink of exhaustion.

 

She was back on her stomach and he on her back when he finally shifted his weight and lay over her, his mouth at her ear.  “More?” he whispered.

 

She elbowed him, and he moved away, letting her move to her side of the bed and curl up into a ball.

 

“Why didn’t you ask me to stop?”  When she said nothing, he nodded and smiled.  “Because you would have to admit you were only trying to get the upper hand.  Or maybe you enjoyed it,” he said offhandedly.  He moved his hand over her arm, and she shrugged it off.  “Do you remember what I said before I left for town?   Be careful what you start.” Wrapping his fingers around her arm, he gently, but firmly moved her to her back.  “Shiloh, that kind of game can get you in more trouble than you can imagine,” he said, keeping any edge out of his voice. He wasn’t angry, but he did want to teach her a lesson she wouldn’t forget.  “I know you didn’t like feeling helpless, but if you’d said that to another man, he might have done worse, only he wouldn’t care about how he made you feel, and he’d leave you bruised and more than just a little sore.”  He watched her look anywhere but at him as her lips pinched together.  “I will never deprive you of a discussion.  I value your opinion, but this time you went too far.  If you do it again, I will end it. It won’t be in front of our children or our friends.  But I will make our excuses and apply my hand to your backside in private.  You should remember how it stung before you do it again.”  He moved away from her and blew out the flame in the lamp. “Now, keeping in mind you should be careful what you ask for, is there anything else you’d like me to teach you?”

 

“No,” she replied quietly.

 

Laying on her back, Shiloh cut her eyes over toward Adam who was already breathing deeply and steadily.  Though she was tired…and sore…she couldn’t sleep.  She kept going over and over in her mind what he’d done.  He wasn’t making it up as he went.  He knew exactly what he was doing. She shuddered and frowned.  She’d always thought he had a healthy appetite in that respect, but she had no idea he could be that…lecherous…at least as far as what she knew which was really only what he’d previously shared with her.  Where had he learned that, and was there really more he hadn’t shown her? She grimaced, convincing herself she didn’t want to know.

 

Quietly leaving the bed, she went into the washroom, drew a bath as hot as she could stand it and slowly sank into the water, hoping it would somehow make her feel…decent…again.

 

Adam awoke and immediately reached for his wife.  She wasn’t there.  He sat up and looked around the room.  He knew it was early as Abel hadn’t awakened, but there was no sign of Shiloh and no sounds from anywhere in the room.  Throwing off the covers, he stood and strode to the washroom.  The door was cracked, so he pushed it open, his jaw dropping at the sight of Shiloh curled up and sleeping in the bathtub.

 

Taking a folded towel off a bureau where Shiloh stored the linens, he flipped it to unfold it and went to the tub, kneeling behind her.  “Shiloh,” he whispered.

 

Without opening her eyes, she grunted, “Hm?”

 

“What are you doing in the bathtub at this hour?”

 

She opened her eyes and looked at him for a split-second, then cast them down.  Slowly shaking off sleep, she looked around her and quickly sat up.  “I must have fallen asleep.” Standing, she grabbed the towel he offered and wrapped it around her before she stepped over the side of the tub and hurried into the bedroom.

 

He followed, watching her look for her robe in the dark.  “Shiloh.”  She ignored him, so he gently grabbed her arms and pulled her against him, wrapping his arms around her.  “Sweetheart…”  He didn’t know exactly what to say, though he could guess what was going through her mind.  Moving to the bed, he sat down and pulled her down beside him. “There’s no reason for you to feel…”

 

“Filthy? Is that what you were thinking, Adam, because that’s exactly how I feel.  Like a…dirty…animal.”

 

He smiled. “It ended the same way it always has, didn’t it? Shiloh?”

 

She shot up to her feet.  “How…who taught you that?  You certainly didn’t make that up as you went.”

 

Now he chuckled.  “A woman.  I was nineteen at the time…and curious.  She was older…experienced.”

 

“Oh,” she said uneasily.  “In a brothel?”

 

“No.  At her home.”

 

“Did you love her?”

 

“No.  As I said, I was nineteen and curious, and she…well, she was someone’s mistress and knew how to be…discreet.”  He watched her sit back down on the bed and drop her head into her hands. “Shiloh, you were ten.  I was in Boston, and you were here.  The thought that I might marry you one day had never crossed my mind.”

 

“It’s not that.” She moved a leg onto the bed as she turned to face him.  “If it had been me…at nineteen, and I had been the mistress, I would surely have been shunned.  But for you, a man, it was just a tryst to be forgotten.”

 

Furrowing his brow, Adam cocked his head slightly.  Was she about to admit something to him?  “Most people believe women don’t have the same thoughts, the same needs as men.”

 

“Another thing they, whoever they are, want you to believe.  It’s not that women don’t have…desires.  It’s society’s expectation of us not to acknowledge them.”

 

“Which is what sends many husbands looking elsewhere…for something more,” he said, fishing.  The corner of his mouth turned up.  “Am I to understand there’s no need to go looking elsewhere?  Not that I would,” he added innocently with raised brows.

 

She shot up off the bed again, scoffed and threw her towel at him, but before she could get away, he pulled her back down and rolled over her.  “Are you all right?” he asked quietly.

 

“Sore,” she said, puckering her lips.

 

He kissed those lips before he gave her an impish grin.  “Then you’ll be reminded all day.”

 

“I already have a reminder, thank you,” she replied, batting her eyelashes and wearing a cheeky smile.  “He’s in the other room.”

 

***

 

Evelyn joined the Cartwrights at the breakfast table along with Robbie whose mood had improved since he’d been able to see his father awake.  “Adam, I was wondering when we’ll be able to go to town.  Robert will need clothes.  Hopefully, he’ll be able to sit in a chair in a few days.  Robbie needs some, too, as do I.  I also want to send some telegrams to let our friends in San Francisco know we’re all right.”

 

Adam paused mid-chew at that last statement.  “I can arrange to get you and Shiloh into town today, but Evelyn, I’m not sure you should send any telegrams just yet.  I’m sure you can trust your friends, but we don’t want Daniel to get wind of where you and Robert are.”

 

She smiled guardedly.  “I’m sure none of our friends would inform him.”

 

“That’s probably true, but Daniel could have accomplices at the telegraph office or tapped in to the telegraph lines.”

 

“Oh,” she said with a troubled look. “I hadn’t considered that.”

 

“Adam, I need to go to Kam Lee’s as well to look in on Ming Lin.”

 

Wiping his mouth, Adam replied, “Then I’m going with you.  I haven’t spoken to Kam Lee yet.  I want to make sure he has everything he needs to care for Ming Lin.”

 

Chapter Sixty-Six

 

After Evelyn helped Robert eat his breakfast, Shiloh, Evelyn and Adam left for the main house, leaving Etta to take care of Abel and Robbie. They stopped by the main house first to ask if Annie needed anything.

 

As it turned out, Ben had business in town as well, and Annie needed to see Paul, so almost everyone went.  Ben rode his horse while Adam borrowed Chubby.  Hoss drove the wagon for the ladies.  In addition, two hands from the Ponderosa rode with them.  Mark and Keith had stayed behind at the Lake House.

 

The trip was uneventful. When they arrived in town, the first stop was the Sheriff’s office.  He met them out on the front porch and tipped his hat to the ladies.

 

“Roy, this is Mrs. Slater,” said Adam.

 

“Ma’am,” he said, smiling.  “How is Mr. Slater?”

 

“He’s improving, thank you, Sheriff,” she replied.

 

“Roy, have you heard anything from San Francisco?” asked Adam.

 

“I sent another telegram yesterday.  Got an answer this morning.  “No one’s seen that Slater fellow or heard anything about him at all. Seems he’s disappeared.”

 

“Well,” said Ben.  “If you ladies will excuse me, I have some business to see to.  Roy,” he said before he turned his horse and rode further into town.

 

“Adam, why don’t I drop you and the ladies off in front of the dress store,” said Hoss. “I’ll drive me and Annie on over to Doc Martin’s and come back when Annie’s done.”

 

When Shiloh and Evelyn were on the boardwalk, Hoss tipped his hat, flicked the reins and drove on down the street.

 

“Evelyn, I’ll introduce you to Mrs. Lewis and you can look at her dresses and patterns.  Adam and I need to check in on our cook,” said Shiloh, glancing up at Adam.

 

While Evelyn and Shiloh were inside the store, Adam dismounted and spoke to the two hands quietly.  “Both of you stay here with Mrs. Slater.  If anyone approaches her who you don’t recognize, tell them to move along.”

 

“Shouldn’t one of us go with you, Mr. Cartwright?”

 

“No,” Adam said, smiling. “We’re going into Chinatown.  We’ll be fine.”

 

Adam offered Shiloh his arm when she came out of the store.  “You look worried.”

 

“I am,” Shiloh answered as they walked into Chinatown.  “Ming Lin should have been better by now.”

 

“How do you know he’s not?”

 

“Because Kam Lee promised me he would send word if there was any change.”

 

No more was said until Adam knocked on Kam Lee’s door.

 

“Ah, Mr. and Mrs. Cartwright.”

 

Removing his hat, Adam said, “Hello, Kam Lee.  I hope this isn’t a bad time.”

 

“It is not.  Please come in.  You have come to see Ming Lin?”

 

“How is he?” asked Shiloh.

 

“He is the same.  I have asked Dr. Martin to confirm his condition, and he has agreed.  There is nothing to do but keep him comfortable.”

 

“Won’t he waste away?” asked Shiloh quietly as Kam Lee motioned them into the room where Ming Lin slept.

 

“He has been able to swallow broth, tea and milk.  He is getting some nourishment. This is a good sign.”

 

Shiloh allowed a small smile to play across her lips, though it didn’t make it to her eyes.  She nodded and stepped back out of the room.

 

Adam stayed behind and spoke quietly to Kam Lee before he also stepped out of the room, following the Chinese doctor to the door. Moving his hat to his head, Adam nodded, and Kam Lee bowed before he closed the door.

 

Shiloh held her husband’s hand tightly as they walked through Chinatown.

 

“What is it, Sweetheart?”

 

“I can’t help but feel responsible. It’s as if we’ve lost a member of the family.”

 

“It sounds like you’ve already buried him.  We haven’t lost him yet.”

 

Her brows curled with her lips as if she was about to cry.  Quickly shaking her head, she changed the subject.  “What were you and Kam Lee talking about?”

 

“I’ll be setting up an account at the bank Kam Lee can use for whatever Ming Lin needs.”

 

“The bank?  Will they let him withdraw any money?”

 

“If they don’t, they won’t have Cartwright business any longer.”

 

They had just walked onto C Street when Evelyn came out of Mrs. Lewis’ store, holding several boxes.

 

Adam hurried over to take them from her.  “I see you found something to your liking.”

 

“Mrs. Lewis is a very nice woman…very talented as well, though her selection isn’t quite the same as San Francisco.”  Closing her eyes, she shook her head.  “I’m sorry.   I suppose I sound like a snob.”

 

Laughing at the comment, Adam said, “It’s not your fault.  San Francisco and Virginia City are two very different cities.  What’s next?”

 

“I need a men’s clothier and some things for Robbie.  Oh, and diapers.  I need cloth for diapers.”

 

Shiloh smiled and slipped her arm into Evelyn’s.  “We’ll be right back,” she said, winking at Adam as she turned Evelyn back into the dress shop where they purchased a bolt of white flannel.

 

Adam walked Evelyn to the men’s clothing store, then he and Shiloh went to the bank.  While Adam was conducting business there, he noticed a man approach Shiloh. Quickly looking over, he took a step toward her when the banker stopped him.

 

“That one is all right, Adam.  He opened an account here several days ago and had funds transferred from Sacramento.  His letters of introduction were exemplary.  He’s looking for horses.”

 

Adam nodded, but kept a close watch on Shiloh as he continued his business with the banker.

 

“Miss Whitney,” the man said, bowing and removing his hat.  “My name is ,  Asher.  I was told you train the finest horses in the west.”

 

Before she spoke, she sized the man up.  He seemed young, was strikingly handsome with dark hair and a mustache, and spoke quietly and politely.  “Surely you were told that I’m no longer Miss Whitney.”

 

He furrowed his brows, and then chuckled.  “Perhaps that’s why people laughed when I asked after you.  I suppose the joke’s on me.”

 

“Oh, I don’t think you’ve been trifled with.  There are times when I do use the Whitney name…when I sing, for instance, but any other time, I’m Mrs. Adam Cartwright…Shiloh Cartwright.”

 

“But I do have the right woman? he asked, slightly turning his head.  “The one who trains horses…Amos Whitney’s daughter?  You’re not quite what I expected.”

 

“Oh?”

 

“Well, when one thinks of horse training the vision that comes to mind certainly isn’t that of a…beautiful, delicate young woman.”

 

She put on a polite smile.  “I’m not that delicate, Mr. Asher.  But I am the right one.   What can I do for you?”

 

“I’m interested in having several horses trained in such a way their spirit remains intact.  You see, I have an idea that horses such as yours, trained rather than broken, will do well on the track.”

 

“Race horses?  I’m afraid I don’t sell horses you would consider racing stock.  My horses are big, heavy, and somewhat flamboyant animals.”

 

“I’m not talking about purchasing your horses, Mrs. Cartwright.  More like your services…training my own horses…Thoroughbreds…Arabians.”

 

“I’m afraid I only work at our ranch.  You’d have to bring them here.  Once I evaluate them, I’ll tell you whether I will train them or not.”

 

“Whether you will or not?”

 

“Yes.  A horse has to be trainable.  If he’s not, I’m not inclined to waste my time. Or yours.”

 

He nodded.  “All right.  I’ll arrange to have my horses brought here, then.  It may take several weeks to get them here.”

 

She gave him her most brilliant smile.  “Bring them out to the Ponderosa Ranch.”

 

He furrowed his brow.  “And where would that be?”

 

Laughing, she said, “Just go west out of town. You’ll eventually run into it.  You’ll want to come to the Lake House, not the main house.”

 

“Very well, Mrs. Cartwright,” said Asher.  “I will send word when the horses arrive.  Good day.”

 

By the time Shiloh’s conversation with Asher had ended, Adam had finished his business with the banker.  He walked over to her side in time to watch the man exit the bank.  “Who is he?” Adam asked, motioning toward the door with his chin.

 

“He wants me to train his horses…race horses,” she answered as she watched Seth Asher walk down the street.

 

“Uh huh,” grunted Adam.

 

“What does that mean?”

 

“Look at him.”

 

She turned to look at Asher again, then looked back at Adam and shrugged.

 

“First, he’s wearing a duster, not a jacket,” said Adam.

 

“Well, he deals with horses.  I don’t see that as unusual.”

 

“Look at the way he walks, the way he carries himself.  His eyes were constantly surveying everything around him, and he looked up at you with his eyes…his face was downturned…like he didn’t want to be recognized…or remembered.  Besides that, he wears his gun like a…”

 

“Stop, Adam.  He was quite pleasant…well spoken, and I didn’t feel threatened at all.  This situation with Daniel is making you overly cautious.”

 

“When it comes to Daniel Slater, there’s no such thing.” He went from a scowl to a smile as he moved his arm around her, though he kept his eyes on Asher.  “I have a lot to lose.”

 

As they walked away from the bank, they found Hoss waiting in the buggy with Annie and Mrs. Slater happily discussing what Mrs. Slater had purchased in addition to medical supplies Annie was able to get at Paul’s surgery.

 

Adam helped Shiloh up into the buggy and looked across at Hoss.  “Why don’t you take everyone to the International for lunch,” he said, smiling at the ladies.  “I’ll join you in a few minutes.  I need to send a telegram.”

 

“Should I order for you?” asked Shiloh.

 

He looked at her for a moment, cocked his head slightly and smiled.  For the first time in weeks, she was wearing a genuinely happy smile herself.  “Steak,” he said.

 

“Of course,” she replied, laughing.  “What else?”  The buggy jerked on its way while Shiloh blew Adam a kiss and waved.

 

He watched until they were well down the street before he turned to the telegraph office.  He’d be sending a telegram to James Haggin at Rancho Del Paso, a ranch just east of Sacramento, inquiring about Seth Asher.  Haggin was establishing a thoroughbred horse breeding and racing business there.  Adam met Haggin and his partner, Lloyd Tevis, while in the company of George Hearst who was a partner with the two men in several mining interests. If there was anyone who might know someone in the area interested in horse racing, it would be James Haggin.

 

The telegram was sent and answered. Even so, in a few days, Seth Asher would be forgotten until he arrived with his horses.

 

***

 

This evening’s meal was made even more special by the presence of Robert at the dining table, along with Hoss, Annie, Etta, Joe and Ben.  It was the largest gathering for dinner that had ever graced the dining table of Adam and Shiloh Cartwright.  All the ladies helped Etta prepare the meal so that the young woman and her daughter could join them for dinner at Joe’s request.

 

The laughter and quiet banter continued late into the night before the Cartwrights who lived in the main house left for home.  Robert retired early, but Evelyn assisted Shiloh and Etta in cleaning up the kitchen while Adam told a bedtime story to Rachel and Robbie as he held Abel on his lap.  Abel quietly rebelled, but eventually became swept up in the deep, melodic cadence of his father’s voice. Before the story was over, he was sleeping soundly against Adam’s chest.

 

Later, with the children tucked in their beds, the house became quiet…more quiet than it had been in a month.

 

***

 

It was now the end of September, and the ranches had made all their contracts for the year and were well into the routine of preparing for winter.  Robert’s wound had mostly healed, and he and Adam worked furiously on proposals, architectural drawings and plans for what they already had on their plate. Robert was preparing to go back to San Francisco to present all their work to their clients.  He would be accompanied by Mark and Keith.  Evelyn and Robbie would stay on at the Ponderosa until such a time as Robert, Adam and the law felt the danger had passed.

 

Daniel had been neither seen nor heard.  It seemed he’d vanished, though Robert was convinced he would reappear at the unlikeliest of time and place in a way none of them would expect.  Perhaps he already had.

 

The End

 

 

Look for To Everything There is a Season – Raising Cartwrights

 

Tags:  Adam Cartwright