Summary:  Joe tries to help Hoss to impress a girl, but things become complicated when Adam also gets involved.

Rated: K+  (10,225 words)

A Hoss by Any Other Name

Hoss Cartwright stood gazing at the object of his affections and sighed as Miss Isabelle Morgan walked past him with a swish of her skirts and a tilt of her head in his direction.  He leant on the lamppost and stared after the vision of loveliness with an ache in his heart, for he knew that she would never be interested in the likes of him and the thought saddened him immensely. Hoss was naturally shy with girls and those such as Isabelle usually intimidated him anyway.  The girl was new in town and had already caused a sensation with her beautiful blonde locks and her fair skin.  Hoss knew that many men would be hankering after the likes of Miss Isabelle Morgan and that he didn’t have a hope of attracting her.  Still, he thought, a man could dream.

‘Whatcha looking at?’ Hoss turned to see his younger brother Joe standing beside him.

‘Nuthin,’ he replied and turned to haul another sack of grain up into the buckboard.

Joe looked down the street and grinned. ‘Isabelle Morgan huh?’ he said cheekily. ‘She’s a right beauty eh brother?  Thinking of sparking her?’

Hoss frowned and tried not to look embarrassed.  It amazed him how Joe always knew whenever he was interested in a woman.  His younger brother had a knack for such things and his own prowess with girls was beginning to be quite legendary around town. ‘Don’t be stupid!’ he muttered. ‘As if the likes of her would be interested in me!’

Joe put his arms around his older brother’s shoulder as Hoss lifted yet another sack of grain. ‘Don’t sell yourself short brother,’ he said. ‘If you’re interested in her then you should at least go and meet her.’

Hoss glared at him. ‘Yeah right!’ he muttered. ‘I’d be wasting my time and you know it.’

Joe sat on the edge of the buckboard and looked thoughtful for a moment. ‘Oh I don’t know,’ he said finally. ‘You’re a Cartwright after all.  That’s got to count for something older brother.’

Hoss stopped working and stared at the youngster. ‘What do ya mean by that?’ he asked.

‘Oh you know,’ replied Joe airily. ‘The family reputation and all. You gotta admit that we’re devastatingly attractive to women.’

‘Some of us might be,’ muttered Hoss as he began to work again. ‘Not all of us though. Out of the way Joe … I gotta put this sack there.  It wouldn’t hurt you to help none either.’

Joe leant forward and ignored his brother’s last comment. ‘You can be if you try Hoss,’ he said. ‘I reckon women would be interested in you if you’d only let em.  Do what I do for a start.’

‘And what would that be?’ asked Hoss sarcastically. ‘Tell em how wonderful you are?’

‘In a way,’ admitted Joe. ‘Haven’t you ever watched our older brother in action? Now if you did, you’d notice how he always impresses them with how much he knows first off.’

Hoss scratched his head. ‘I ain’t no Adam,’ he said. ‘I can’t talk fancy and such like he does.’

‘I know that,’ admitted Joe. ‘But you’ve only got to give the impression that you do.  I’ve watched Adam and it’s true.  You start off a conversation and then the girl takes over after a bit.  I’ve tried it and it really works.  You don’t have to know much about them things that a girl likes … just make them think that you do.’  He sat back and put his hands behind his head. ‘I reckon you should give it a go with Isabelle Hoss. What you got to lose?’

Hoss thought for a moment. ‘Mebbe,’ he said and then his eyes narrowed. ‘Hey! How come you’re not after her yaself younger brother? She’s right good looker and you usually don’t let any girl in town get away without a fight.’

Joe gave a contented sigh. ‘Well let’s just say that I’ve got my full share of women at the moment,’ he said with a knowing look. ‘Besides she’s a bit too old for me, don’t you think?’

‘Mebbe,’ admitted Hoss. ‘Still … I can’t help but think that she wouldn’t be interested in the likes of me.’

‘Well you won’t know unless you try,’ urged Joe. ‘Go on Hoss …. Give it a go.’

‘What will I talk about?’ asked Hoss. ‘I got no idea.’

‘Just ask her about herself,’ said Joe. ‘And if you need to, then just mention how you like books and music and stuff.  It always works for Adam and me.’

‘Yeah but Adam really likes that stuff and you …’ Hoss faltered. ‘Well, you just pretend to.’

‘And so can you!’ declared Joe. ‘See?  I just pretend to and I get away with it!  You can too Hoss … go on, give it a try!’

Hoss’ face split into a huge grin as he dragged the last of the sack onto the buckboard. ‘Yeah!’ he said. ‘I believe you’re right Joe. After all, what have I got to lose?’

‘That’s the spirit!’ said Joe, patting him on the back. ‘Now that we’ve finished loading all them supplies there’s nothing to stop you doing it right now.’  He motioned to Isabelle who was standing a little way down the street looking into a store window. ‘Go get her Hoss!  I’ll be in the Saloon having a drink while I wait.  I think I’ve earned it after all that hard work.’

Hoss’ eyes were transfixed on the object of his attentions. ‘Yeah Joe,’ he said absently. ‘You get yaself a drink and I’ll meet ya there later.’

‘Good luck!’ shouted Joe as he watched Hoss walking down the street.

As Hoss approached Isabelle he took off his hat and smoothed back his hair before swallowing a couple of times.  Close up she looked even more lovely and he was momentarily tongue-tied as he stared at her. Finally, Isabelle turned to look at him. ‘Can I help you?’ she asked sweetly.

‘Um … morning ma’am,’ Hoss muttered. ‘I just though I’d introduce myself, seeing as how you’re new in town and all.’ He gave her a grin and she gave him a sweet smile in return.

‘Oh that’s very nice of you!’ she exclaimed. ‘I haven’t had the chance to meet many new people here yet. Mr …’  She held out her hand and Hoss grasped it firmly.

‘Cartwright,’ he said.

‘Oh!’ Her eyes lit up. ‘One of the Cartwrights!  I’ve heard about your family.’

‘Have ya?’ Hoss was becoming more entranced with the girl with every passing moment. ‘That’s nice.’

‘Yes,’ gushed Isabelle. ‘I believe you own a large ranch outside town?’

‘That’s right ma’am,’ said Hoss dreamily. ‘We do.’

‘And you have two brothers,’ continued Isabelle. ‘I’ve heard that two of you are very good looking.’

Hoss faltered. ‘Two of us?’ he said warily. ‘Well …’

‘I don’t mean to be rude at all,’ said Isabelle lightly. ‘But the third brother … Hoss isn’t it? Well I’ve heard that he’s not quite what the other two are. He’s more of a shy type, whereas the other two are very interesting companions.’  She looked at Hoss hopefully. ‘Which one are you?’ she asked.  When Hoss hesitated she continued. ‘You’re not young enough to be … I believe it’s … Joe? Anyway people have told me that he’s a bit of a ladies man so I’d best steer clear of him.  So you must be the older brother … Adam is it?’

Hoss hesitated for another moment before making up his mind. ‘Um … well …’

Isabelle put out her hand again and gave him a devastating smile. ‘So pleased to meet you Adam,’ she said. ‘It’s so nice to meet a man with an interest in the finer things of life way out here in the west.  I’ve heard that you are quite the expert on literature and music.  Perhaps we could get together sometime and talk about our mutual interests?’

Hoss swallowed and made a quick decision. ‘Um… yeah,’ he said lamely. ‘I mean … yes certainly.’

Isabelle smiled again. ‘That would be lovely,’ she pressed. ‘When?’

‘Huh?’  Hoss was still reeling from the shock of being called Adam.

‘When could we get together Adam?’

‘Um … how about tomorrow?’ suggested Hoss when he’d found his voice again. ‘We could … um …’ he searched his brain for something to suggest. ‘We could go ….’

A buggy ride would be nice,’ Isabelle finished for him.

‘Yeah!’ said Hoss with a grin. ‘A buggy ride.’

Isabelle took his hand again and shook it. ‘Until tomorrow then,’ she said brightly. ‘I’ll be looking forward to it Adam.’

‘Me too,’ said Hoss dreamily as he watched her walk away.  For several minutes he stood there staring after the girl and then he clapped his hand to his head in dismay. ‘Oh Lordy!’ he exclaimed. ‘What have I done now?’

He turned and ran towards the Saloon and entered it, immediately spying Joe seated in the corner. ‘Hoss!’ called out his brother. ‘Over here!’ Hoss sat down next to his younger brother and stared at him without saying a word. ‘What’s the matter Hoss?’ asked Joe. ‘You don’t look too good.  She reject you huh?’ Hoss shook his head without speaking. ‘She didn’t?’ asked Joe. Hoss shook his head again. ‘Then what happened?’ asked Joe curiously. ‘Tell me Hoss!’

Hoss swallowed before opening his mouth. ‘She …. um … she … me and her’s gonna go on a buggy ride tomorrow,’ he said finally.

Joe clapped his brother on the back and grinned at him. ‘See?’ he said. ‘I told you that you could do it! It wasn’t hard, was it?’

Hoss shook his head again. ‘Nah!’ he admitted. ‘It weren’t hard at all. She was right taken with me.’

‘I knew she would be,’ said Joe smugly and he took another swig of his beer. ‘After all, you are a Cartwright.’

‘Yeah,’ admitted Hoss. ‘Only I ain’t the Cartwright she thinks!’

‘Huh?’

‘She thinks I’m Adam,’ said Hoss mournfully.

Joe looked puzzled. ‘Now why on earth would she think that?’ he asked.

‘Cause I let her,’ replied Hoss sadly.

Joe put down his beer and gave his brother an incredulous look. ‘What?’ he said. ‘Why?’

‘Cause she was saying how she’d heard that I wasn’t good round women,’ Hoss explained, his face reflecting his misery. ‘And then she said how you and Adam were.’

Joe puffed up. ‘She did?’ he said with a glint in his eye.

‘Yeah,’ continued Hoss mournfully. ‘And then she naturally assumed that I was Adam.’  He put his face in his hands. ‘And I let her,’ he said.

Joe made a face. ‘Well you’ll just have to go back and tell her that you ain’t Adam,’ he said firmly.

‘But I can’t Joe!’ exclaimed Hoss. ‘She’s … I mean … she’s plumb beautiful!  I can’t just go and tell her that I lied.  She’ll never have anything more ta do with me.’  His face took on a blissful look and he continued dreamily. ‘Ya don’t understand Joe.  I think I’m in love!’

‘But you’ve only just met her!’ protested Joe. ‘You can’t possibly be in love Hoss.’

‘When you’re in love you’re just in love,’ Hoss assured his brother. ‘Ain’t no getting around that fact.’  His face took on a look of desperation. ‘Help me Joe,’ he pleaded. ‘What am I gonna do?’

Joe thought for a moment. ‘Well there’s only two things you can do Hoss,’ he said finally. ‘Tell her the truth and hope that she understands, or …’  He looked his brother up and down. ‘Keep on pretending that you’re Adam I guess. That way you might have the chance to get to know her before she does find out the truth.  By the time she does, then she might like you enough to forgive you.’

‘Yeah!’ said Hoss happily. ‘I’ll pretend ta be Adam fer a bit longer.’ His smile suddenly turned  into a frown. ‘But I can’t Joe! She thinks that Adam knows bout books and music and suchlike. I don’t know none of them things!’

Joe shrugged. ‘Well you’ll just have to learn a bit,’ he said. ‘Just enough to get the conversation going.  She should take over after you do.’

Hoss took off his hat and ran his fingers through his hair in a frustrated gesture. ‘But I wouldn’t even know where ta start looking fer things like that.’ He clutched at his brother’s collar. ‘Ya gotta help me Joe!’

Joe shook himself free. ‘You just do what I do,’ he said. ‘Check out older brother’s books and stuff.’  He patted Hoss on the arm and his eyes took on a crafty look. ‘Don’t you worry Hoss. I’ll help you.  After all, what are brothers for?’

Hoss shot his younger brother a grateful look. ‘Thanks Joe,’ he said. ‘I sure owe ya one.’

==========

Ben looked up from his newspaper. ‘Joseph?  What on earth are you doing?’ he asked.

Joe gave his father a grin before turning back to perusing the bookshelves. ‘Just looking for a book,’ he said.

‘What?’  Adam straightened up in his chair and gave his youngest brother an incredulous look as he closed his own book with a bang. ‘You’re what?’

Joe gave him a dark look. ‘Don’t look so surprised,’ he said. ‘I do read sometimes you know.’

‘You do?’ said his father before he could stop himself. ‘I mean … of course son.  Anything in particular you were looking for?’

‘Well actually it’s for Hoss,’ explained Joe. ‘He and I were talking bout that Shakespeare fellar today and …’

Adam began to choke and his father leant over and slapped him on the back a couple of times to relieve him. ‘Who?’ he asked when he’d caught his breath again.

‘Shakespeare,’ repeated Joe, oblivious to the looks he was getting from both of them. ‘Don’t we have a book with all his ….’  He pulled a large volume down from the shelf. ‘Ah … Here it is!  I knew we had one somewhere.’

Ben frowned. ‘Joe don’t you think that might be a bit heavy for you?’ he asked discreetly. ‘You’re not really used to reading such things.  Perhaps something a bit lighter?’

‘No thanks Pa,’ said Joe blithely as he walked upstairs. ‘This will do.  Me and Hoss are gonna read it together and discuss it.’

‘Let me know if you want any help understanding it!’ called out Adam sarcastically. ‘There’s a dictionary on the shelf if you want it!’

Ben slapped his eldest son on the shoulder and then pointed a finger at him. ‘Be quiet!’ he whispered. ‘I think it’s wonderful that those two are finally trying to better themselves.’ Adam raised an eyebrow and said nothing as he opened his book again.

‘Here you go Hoss,’ said Joe happily as he entered his brother’s bedroom. ‘The Complete Works of Shakespeare.  That oughta impress her!’  He settled down on the bed beside his brother and began to read. ‘Hmm,’ he said after a few minutes.

‘What?’ asked Hoss, leaning over his shoulder to get a better look. ‘Something the matter?’

Joe scrunched up his nose. ‘I see what Pa means,’ he said. ‘This is awful heavy. This Shakespeare guy writes funny too.’

‘Funny how?’ asked Hoss.

‘Well look here … see? … he can’t even spell the words right,’ said Joe as he held the book up for Hoss to look at.

‘How come them gals all like his stories and stuff then Joe?’ asked Hoss.

‘He’s romantic is all,’ replied Joe. ‘Now all we gotta do is find one of them love stories that Adam is always going on about and … ah!’ His eyes lit up as he turned a page. ‘This is what we’re looking for Hoss.  Romeo and Juliet.  I remember Miss Jones used to make us read this one at school.  All the girls loved it.’

‘What’s it about?’

‘Well it’s all about these two people who fall in love …’ began Joe.

‘Just like me and Miss Isabelle,’ interrupted Hoss with a faraway look in his eye.

Joe gave him a frustrated look. ‘Yeah,’ he said. ‘Well anyway … it’s about two people who fall in love.  Cept their families don’t get on and they haveta meet in secret.  At the end they both die.’

‘They get shot?’ asked Hoss, suddenly interested.

‘No.  I think that he drinks poison and then she stabs herself or something like that,’ said Joe, turning the pages to find out. Now what you gotta do is just learn some of the romantic bits by heart and act like you know the whole story when she starts talking about it.’

But Joe … how do I know she’s gonna talk bout this one?’ asked Hoss with a perplexed look on his face. ‘What if she starts on bout one of them others?’

Joe sighed. ‘You start talking bout this one first,’ he said. ‘And if she changes it to one of the others then you steer the conversation back to this one.’

Hoss didn’t look too sure of himself. ‘But what if …’

‘Trust me Hoss,’ said Joe, putting his arm around his brother’s shoulder. ‘Have I ever let you down before?’

Hoss thought for a moment. ‘Well to be honest Joe …’ he began.

‘Let’s find the romantic bits and you can learn em,’ said Joe quickly.  He began to turn the pages again.

Suddenly there was a sound at the door and they both looked up to see Adam standing there. ‘How’s it going?’ he asked with a smirk on his face. ‘Found anything interesting to discuss yet?’

Joe gave him a superior look. ‘As a matter of fact we have,’ he said. ‘We’re looking at Romeo and Juliet first. Hoss here was just saying how much he likes the feud between the families.’

‘There’s a feud?’ said Hoss, grabbing the book. ‘I didn’t know that … Show me!’

Adam stifled a laugh. ‘I see,’ he said smugly. ‘And I suppose you’ve noticed the underlying tragedy that unfolds throughout the story. The parallels between love and violence?’

Joe hesitated. ‘Of course!’ he said. ‘Anyone could see that!  I was just about to say the very same thing to Hoss. Wasn’t I Hoss?’

‘I reckon so,’ said Hoss, still turning pages and looking for a mention of the feud.

‘Hmm,’ said Adam. ‘May I ask why the sudden interest in culture?’

‘Ain’t nothing sudden about it,’ said Joe loftily. ‘Hoss has always been interested in such stuff.’

‘Has he?’ replied Adam, leaning against the door and watching Hoss who was still turning the pages furiously while looking for a reference to the feud. ‘I must have missed that.’

Joe snatched the book for Hoss and closed it with a bang. ‘If you don’t mind,’ he said to Adam. ‘We’ve got things to talk about.’

‘Sorry,’ said Adam with a sarcastic grin. ‘I don’t mean to interrupt your indepth discussion. Please carry on.’  He turned and left, chuckling all the way down the hallway.

‘Don’t worry about him,’ said Joe. ‘He just thinks he’s so clever.  Now, let’s get some of them fancy words memorised huh?’

‘Anything you say Joe,’ replied Hoss. ‘I’m in your hands.’

‘Just remember that Hoss and you can’t go wrong,’ said Joe smugly. ‘We’ll have Isabelle eating out of your hands in no time.’

==========

Hoss gazed into Isabelle’s blue eyes with a dreamy expression on his face, happy to listen as he had done for the past ten minutes while she talked on about her life. Finally she stopped and drew breath, turning to him. ‘Well enough about me,’ she said. ‘How about you Adam?  What are you interested in?’

Hoss took a deep breath and tried to remember Joe’s instructions. ‘Um … well I kinda like that Shakespeare fellar … I mean … writer,’ he said.

Isabelle’s eye lit up. ‘Do you?’ she said excitedly. ‘It’s so nice to find a man who does!’

Hoss grinned at her. ‘Um … yeah,’ he said. ‘I mean … yes. I specially like that Romeo and Juliet one he wrote.’

‘Oh yes! Isn’t it wonderful?  What is your favourite part?’

Hoss took a deep breath and concentrated. ‘Um …. That bit where Romeo is under her porch … I mean … balcony …’ he began. He screwed up his eyes momentarily as he tried to remember: ‘What light through yonder window breaks … ‘ he began.

Isabelle drew closer to him and put her head on his shoulder. ‘That’s lovely Adam.  Please go on.’

Hoss puffed up and began to think that this wasn’t too difficult at all. ‘Um … tis … um … tis …’

‘ …The measure done, I’ll watch her place of stand, and touching hers, make blessed my rude hand,’ interrupted Isabelle. ‘That’s one of my favourite parts.  Don’t you just love it?’

Yes ma’am,’ agreed Hoss. He searched his brain for a comment. ‘Cept that bit about the rude hand,’ he added. ‘Ain’t right ta be rude no how.’

Isabelle giggled. ‘Oh you are funny!’ she said. ‘A sense of humour as well as a wonderful mind.  You really are a treasure Adam.’

Hoss looked pleased with himself. ‘Thank you ma’am,’ he said. ‘I try.’

‘Much and all as I love Shakespeare though, I must admit that my first love is music,’ said Isabelle. ‘Don’t you just love Baroque music Adam?’

Hoss swallowed. ‘Yes ma’am,’ he said, wondering what one earth it was. ‘I sure do.  Now bout that Romeo and Juliet …’

I particularly love Bach.  Do you?’

Hoss swallowed again, wondering why on earth she was skipping from one topic to the other so quickly. ‘I sure do, he said. ‘Being as how we have so many pine trees on the ranch I’m just naturally fond of bark.’

Isabelle giggled again.  ‘Oh you are funny!’ she said. ‘I believe that you have a wonderful singing voice Adam.’

‘Yes ma’am,’ said Hoss warily. ‘Now that Romeo fellar …’

Perhaps we might be able to have a little musical soiree together?’ suggested Isabelle as she snuggled in against his broad shoulder. ‘I play the piano you know and I would love to play for you.’

Hoss smiled. ‘That’d be great,’ he said, thinking that he really couldn’t go too wrong with just listening.

‘Wonderful!’ said Isabelle. ‘Tomorrow at two then?  I’ll be expecting you Adam and I’ll be looking forward to discussing our favourite composers together.’

‘Yes ma’am,’ said Hoss, giving her a grin and thinking of all the studying he’d have to do that night.  He sure hoped that Joe knew something about music!

==========

‘Music!’ said Joe in an irritated tone. ‘I thought you were going to impress her with Shakespeare!’

‘I tried Joe,’ said Hoss humbly. ‘Honest I did! But she kept on bout music instead.  She also likes trees though … talked about bark like she was right fond of it.’

Joe gave his brother a strange look. ‘Well I don’t know,’ he mused. ‘Seems to me that we spent all that time learning Romeo and Juliet for nothing.’

‘Don’t worry about that,’ said Hoss confidently. ‘I’ll work it into the conversation sometime Joe. I ain’t finished with that Shakespeare fellar yet. Did you know that he wrote some rude bits too?’

Joe nodded absently. ‘We’ll have to get our hands on some of Adam’s music,’ he mused. ‘I’m sure he’s got some in his room. Let’s go in and see if we can find any.’  He jumped up and led Hoss into Adam’s room and looked around hopefully. ‘Now,’ he mused. ‘I wonder where he keeps it.’  He opened the cupboard and searched inside for a few minutes. ‘Ah!  Here it is!’ he said as he drew some sheet music out. ‘I knew he had some.’  He settled down on the bed and motioned for Hoss to do the same. ‘Now’ he said confidently. ‘Let’s have a look.’

Hoss picked up a piece of music and looked at it with a puzzled expression on his face. ‘I dunno Joe,’ he said. ‘This stuff means nuthin ta me.  I can’t read music no how.’

‘Well neither can I,’ said Joe as he leafed through some of the pieces. ‘But that doesn’t matter.  All you’ve got to do is memorise some of the names.  Then you just say that you enjoy their … um melodies … and stuff like that.’

‘Huh?’

‘Melodies,’ repeated Joe. ‘Just remember that word.  And there’s another one you can use too.  Harmony.’

Hoss nodded. ‘Melodies and harmony,’ he said. ‘Anything else?’

Joe thought for a moment. ‘Um … well you could say that you enjoy the lilting tone of her playing. I heard Adam say that once to a girl and she looked real impressed.’

‘Lilting tone of her playing,’ repeated Hoss dutifully. ‘What’s that mean Joe?’

Joe shrugged. ‘I dunno,’ he admitted. ‘It sounds good though. Hey!  Here’s a good composer you can talk about.  Adam’s got lots of his music so he must be good.’  He held out the music book to Hoss who peered at it.

‘Chop … Chopp-in,’ said Hoss. ‘He gave a short laugh. ‘He’s got a funny name ain’t he Joe.  Sounds the same as choppin wood! I reckon I’ll remember that one.’

‘Just what do you two think you’re doing?’

Joe and Hoss jumped at the sound of Adam’s voice as he entered the room. ‘Um … hi Adam,’ said Joe, putting the music behind him and trying to sit on it.

Adam reached over and pulled the sheets from under his brother, giving him a dark look as he straightened them out. ‘I asked what you were doing,’ he repeated. ‘Why are you in my room looking through my things?’

‘It was Hoss,’ said Joe as innocently as possible under the circumstances. ‘He insisted on coming in here and asked me where you kept your music.  He’s right interested in music, ain’t ya Hoss?’

Reckon so,’ said Hoss. ‘Didn’t think ya’d mind Adam.’

‘Now let me get this straight,’ replied Adam. ‘First you’re interested in Shakespeare and now you’re into classical music composers. What is all this about?’

Hoss shrugged. ‘I dunno,’ he said. ‘I just am is all.’  Adam continued to stare at him and he began to shuffle his feet and put his head down.’

‘He’s just embarrassed to tell you is all,’ interrupted Joe. ‘You see there’s this girl that he’s interested in …’

‘Ah!’ said Adam, sitting down. ‘Now the truth comes out.  You’re interested in a girl and you’re trying to impress her, is that it?’

‘Reckon so,’ muttered Hoss.

‘Well why didn’t you just tell me that?’ enquired Adam. ‘I can understand that you want her to think well of you Hoss.  The only thing is that it’s usually best to just be yourself.’

‘I can’t just be myself,’ said Hoss and then frowned as Joe kicked him.

‘Why not? I’m sure that if you give her the chance to know the real Hoss Cartwright then you’ll get on well,’ insisted Adam. ‘Who is this girl anyway?’

‘Isabelle Morgan,’ said Hoss. ‘She’s new in town.’

Adam raised an eyebrow. ‘I’ve heard of her,’ he said. ‘She sounds very … well … well-bred.’

‘She sure is!’ enthused Hoss. ‘She knows all bout books and music and stuff!  I’m going to a musical soiree at her place tomorrow!’

‘I see,’ said Adam. ‘And you want to show her how much you know about music, is that it?’

‘Sure is,’ said Hoss. ‘Can ya help me Adam?’

‘Hey!’ protested Joe. ‘What about me?  I was helping you too!’

‘You?’ said Adam with a short laugh. ‘What do you know about music?’

‘I know lots of things!’ declared Joe indignantly. ‘I know about melodies and harmony and … other stuff too.’

‘Don’t ferget bout them lilting tones too Joe,’ added Hoss supportively. ‘Ya know bout them too.’

‘Yeah,’ agreed Joe. ‘I know bout them lilting tones.’

Adam raised the other eyebrow. ‘Well this girl sounds like she’s worth a bit of trouble,’ he said, to Hoss, ignoring his youngest brother. ‘She actually sounds like someone I might be interested in myself.’

‘Don’t be so selfish Adam,’ said Joe. ‘Hoss saw her first and … besides … he’s in love with her!  You can’t make a move on her too.’

‘I didn’t say I would,’ said Adam patiently. ‘Of course I wouldn’t come between Hoss and a girl. Tell you what though Hoss.’  He put an arm around his brother’s shoulder. ‘I’ll help you impress this girl and wish you luck with her.  How’s that?’

‘Gee thanks Adam,’ said Hoss with a grin. ‘I’m gonna do real fine with her now!’

==========

Hoss sat with a dreamy expression on his face as he listened to Isabelle play.  The afternoon had gone very well so far, the only problem being his string tie which threatened to choke him at any moment.  He fingered it for the tenth time that hour as he listened to the girl playing and when she stopped he burst into enthusiastic applause. ‘That was great!’ he said.

‘Thank you,’ said Isabelle with a lovely smile.  She stood up and came to sit next to him on the sofa. ‘Let’s talk for a while shall we?  Which of the pieces I played did you like the best Adam?’

‘They were all real fine,’ said Hoss with a broad grin. ‘I like the … um … melodies and the harmony,’ he said confidently.

‘Don’t you think that Bach has the most wonderful sound?’

Hoss frowned and wondered why she kept talking about trees all the time. ‘I ain’t sure bout that,’ he said. ‘I mean … I’m not too sure.  I didn’t know that bark could make a noise.’

Isabelle gave him a strange look. ‘Who are your favourite composers Adam?’ she asked.

Hoss grinned at her, confident with all the names that Adam had made him learn. ‘I … like … enjoy … Schubert and Handel and that Beethoven fellar,’ he said.

‘Ah Schubert!  Don’t you just love his songs?’

‘I reckon,’ said Hoss. ‘He has … lilting tones.’

Isabelle beamed at him. ‘Oh … you do understand!’ she gushed. ‘I knew that you would!  It’s so lovely to meet a man who can appreciate such things Adam.’

Hoss looked very pleased with himself. ‘How about you perform now?’ asked Isabelle. ‘I could accompany you on the piano while you sing some Schubert for me.’

Hoss swallowed several times.  This was a development that he hadn’t anticipated. ‘I …I ….’ He stammered as Isabelle dragged him over to the piano. ‘I … reckon not,’ he said finally.

‘Oh?’ Isabelle sounded disappointed. ‘Why not?’

‘Well ….’ Hoss searched his brain for an excuse, but came up with nothing. ‘Well …’ His face lightened and he clutched at his throat. ‘I can’t sing today Miss Isabelle.  I got sort of a bad throat.’

Isabelle immediately looked concerned. ‘Oh what a shame!’ she exclaimed. ‘I suppose there’ll be no hope of hearing you sing at church tomorrow then as well?’

Hoss tried to look sad through his relief. ‘No ma’am,’ he said. ‘I’m afraid not.’

‘But you will be at church won’t you?’ asked Isabelle hopefully.

‘Sure will.’

‘And at the picnic afterwards?’

Hoss grinned at her. ‘Yes ma’am.  I’ll be there all right.  Wouldn’t miss one of them picnics.’

Isabelle waited. ‘Perhaps I’ll see you there then,’ she said finally.

‘Yes ma’am,’ replied Hoss. ‘I’m sure you will.’

Isabelle waited again. ‘Perhaps we could go together?’

Hoss grinned at her. ‘That’d be fine Miss Isabelle,’ he said. ‘I’d like that.’  He gave her a dreamy look.  Things were definitely going from strength to strength with this relationship that was for sure!

==========

‘You asked her where?’ Joe spluttered into his breakfast coffee. ‘Hoss!’

Ben put down his own cup of coffee and glared at his youngest son. ‘And what is wrong with your brother asking a young lady to the church picnic may I ask?’ he said. ‘You and Adam are always asking girls to those events.’

‘I know that Pa,’ said Joe. ‘But Isabelle might …’ he faltered as he looked across the table at Adam.

‘She might what?’ asked his father.

‘Well …’ Joe struggled for the right thing to say. ‘She might … well Hoss … don’t you want some time alone with her?’

‘Nah!’ said Hoss. ‘I’d like ta take her to the picnic.’

‘But Hoss!’  Joe kicked his brother under the table and indicated Adam with his fork. ‘Think about it!’

‘Think about what?’ asked Hoss. He looked over at Adam. ‘Oh yeah I forgot!’  He clapped his hand over his mouth in dismay.

‘Forgot what?’ asked their father. ‘Just what are you two up to this time?’

‘We ain’t up to nothing Pa,’ declared Joe. ‘Only … only I reckon Hoss and Isabelle shouldn’t come to the picnic yet.  I mean … they hardly know each other and all.  Don’t you think he should know her a bit better before he starts going to picnics with her?’  He looked at his father hopefully, willing him to disapprove of the event.

‘I don’t see anything wrong with your brother seeing this young lady at a church picnic Joseph,’ said his father sternly. ‘In fact she sounds very nice and I’m looking forward to meeting her.’

‘Me too,’ said Adam. ‘She sounds interesting.’

‘You keep away from her!’ said Joe. ‘You can’t meet her!’

‘Why not?’ asked Adam. ‘I have a particular interest in this young lady, seeing as how I’m partly responsible for Hoss impressing her.’

Hoss went pale. ‘What do ya mean?’ he said. ‘How did you find out?’

Adam leant forward suspiciously. ‘Find out what?’ he asked. ‘What am I supposed to have found out about?’

‘Just how good looking she is,’ interrupted Joe quickly. ‘Hoss is afraid that you’ll steal her away with all your charm older brother. ‘He don’t want you to get too close to her.’

‘I’ve already told you that I wouldn’t dream of coming between Hoss and his girl,’ replied Adam haughtily. ‘Pa … could you please tell your youngest son …’

Ben put up his hand in defence. ‘I’ve told you boys before to leave me out of your love lives,’ he said. ‘I have no intention of interfering in any of this.’  He threw down his napkin. ‘Now let’s get going.  We don’t want to be late for church.’

‘Or that picnic afterwards,’ said Adam smugly as he gave Hoss and Joe a meaningful look. ‘There will be a lot of people to catch up with.’

As Ben and Adam left the table, Joe leant across and hit Hoss on the head. ‘What did you go and do that for?’ he asked. ‘Didn’t you think of her meeting Pa and Adam?’

Hoss gave his brother an apologetic look. ‘I never did Joe.  What are we gonna do now?’

‘We’ll just have to keep them away from her,’ mused Joe. ‘It won’t be easy though.’

‘Joseph! Hoss! Come along please!’ their father called from the doorway. ‘We don’t want to be late!’

Joe shrugged as he got up from the table. ‘You’d better do some praying in church brother,’ he said. ‘We’re gonna need all the help that we can get.’

==========

As the congregation spilled out of the small church, Joe jostled his way to the front of the crowd, pulling Hoss along behind him. ‘Hurry up!’ he said urgently. ‘We gotta get Pa and Adam outta here and on to the picnic grounds as soon as we can.’

‘Why?’ asked Hoss as he looked around for Isabelle.

‘So that they don’t meet her stupid!’ snarled Joe. ‘It’s easier for us to keep em apart there somewhere where there’s lots of space. ‘You get Pa and I’ll get Adam.’

Hoss nodded and went in search of his father while Joe went to seek out Adam.  He found him emerging from the church and immediately went to stand by his side. ‘What?’ said Adam testily as he scanned the area. ‘What do you want?

‘Just being friendly brother is all,’ said Joe with a sweet smile at him. ‘Pa ways that we gotta get going quickly to the picnic grounds, so he sent me to look for you.’

Adam continued to scan the area. ‘Well I don’t see how he could have told you that, considering how he’s still inside the church,’ he said dryly. ‘Besides, I’ve got someone to meet before we get going.  I want to check out this girl of Hoss’ first.’

‘Oh her!’ said Joe with an airy wave of his hand. ‘I don’t even think she’s here.’

‘I think she is,’ said Adam triumphantly as he spied a new face in the crowd. ‘That would have to be her over there.’

Joe pulled on his brother’s sleeve. ‘Pa said to come on!’ he said desperately. ‘We gotta get in the buggy now!’

‘Later,’ said Adam. He gave his brother a hard look. ‘Why are you so darned determined for me not to meet her anyway?’

‘Me?’ said Joe innocently. ‘Gee, I don’t care if you meet her or not. I was just thinking of Hoss being jealous is all.  You know me Adam … always thinking of everyone’s else’s feelings.’  Adam said nothing, but merely raised an eyebrow as he stepped down from the stairs and began to walk in Isabelle’s direction.

Joe raced after him. ‘I heard Pa calling out for us!’ he said. ‘Come on before he gets angry!’

Adam ignored his brother and continued to make his way towards Isabelle. ‘Holy Toledo!’ said Joe, slapping his hand onto his forehead before looking around in desperation for Hoss. He spied his middle brother standing near the fence near their father who was talking to Doctor Martin and raced over to him. ‘Hoss!’ he whispered urgently. ‘Hoss! Get over here!’

Hoss shuffled over to his younger brother. ‘What?’ he said. ‘I’m busy getting Pa into the buggy like ya said Joe.’

‘Forget Pa!’ said Joe as he pulled his brother towards Adam who by now was standing next to Isabelle. ‘We gotta stop Adam!’

Hoss took one look at his older brother and swallowed. ‘I reckon I’m dead!’ he said mournfully.

Joe continued to pull him in Adam’s direction. ‘Never say die brother!’ he said. ‘Hi Adam!’

‘You again!’ replied Adam as Joe wedged himself and Hoss in between Adam and Isabelle. He craned his neck over his brother’s head and smiled at Isabelle. ‘Morning ma’am,’ he said with a smile. ‘I thought I’d introduce myself. My name is ….’

‘Cartwright,’ interrupted Joe as he turned to face Isabelle. ‘I’m Joe Cartwright ma’am and this is my brother.’  He gave the woman one of his most devastating smiles.

Isabelle beamed at them both. ‘Lovely to meet you both,’ she said. ‘Your brother has told me all about you both.’  She clutched hold of Hoss’ arm and smiled up at him. Hoss returned the smile with a weak one of his own.

‘Well I’m sure that you two would like to be alone,’ said Joe quickly. ‘Come on brother let’s go.’  He clutched hold of Adam’s arm and tried to pull him away, but Adam stood firm.

‘I sure hope you’re settling in well to our fine town,’ said Adam, ignoring Joe.

‘Oh yes,’ replied Isabelle with a lovely smile. ‘Adam has been telling all about it.  I’m sure that I’ll be very happy here.’

Adam frowned. ‘I beg your pardon?’ he said.

‘Adam has been most gentlemanly in showing me around,’ replied Isabelle. ‘He certainly knows the place well.’

‘I see,’ said Adam, his eyes narrowing. ‘I think I’m beginning to see a lot of things now.’  He gave Hoss a dark look and Hoss swallowed before giving his brother a half-hearted smile. ‘And just what have you and …. Adam been doing?’ Adam asked, his jaw set.

‘Oh we’ve been spending a lot of time talking about literature and music, haven’t we Adam?’ replied Isabelle, smiling up at Hoss. ‘I’m sure you know how much your brother knows about such things.  He’s very interested in culture.’ Adam said nothing, but continued to stare at Hoss who avoided looking at him. ‘You must be the other brother … Hoss isn’t it?’ asked Isabelle sweetly. ‘Funny, but you’re different to the way I pictured you.’

‘Am I?’ replied Adam. ‘Well I think that you should know ma’am that ….’

‘That we have to go!’ interrupted Joe.

Hoss gave his younger brother a grateful look and turned with Isabelle still on his arm. ‘I’ll walk ya to ya buggy Miss Isabelle,’ he said and looked over his shoulder at his brothers as they walked away.

‘So that’s what you two have been on about!’ said Adam, his anger spilling over as soon as Hoss and Isabelle were out of earshot. ‘How could you!’

‘It weren’t my doing!’ replied Joe indignantly. ‘Hoss let her think that he was you!  She likes cultured men.’

‘But you went along with it!’ Adam put his finger under Joe’s nose in a threatening manner. ‘If I know you Joseph Cartwright you’d have been encouraging him no end!’  He looked thoughtful. ‘Now I understand why all the interest in Shakespeare and musical composers.’

‘Hoss only did it because he admires you so much!’  Joe tried desperately to reach his brother’s conscience. ‘He didn’t mean nothing by it!’

‘He didn’t mean anything by it?’ said Adam incredulously. ‘Only took my identity and lied to that poor girl! I’m going to set her straight right now!’

Joe clutched at his older brother’s sleeve. ‘Aw come on Adam!” he said. ‘It ain’t hurting none.’

‘Well it’s hurting me!’ replied Adam as he shook himself free. ‘Who do you expect me to be …. Hoss?’

‘Well …. Yeah.’ said Joe with a hopeful look at his brother. ‘Why not?’

‘What?!’ Adam gave his youngest brother an incredulous look. ‘You can’t be serious?’

‘Just for a little while,’ pleaded Joe. ‘You know how hard it is for Hoss Adam.  He needs your help.’  Adam was silent, so Joe pressed further. ‘He’s got no confidence with girls … you know that.  This is the only way that he’s gonna be able to keep Isabelle interested in him.  What harm can it do just for a bit?’

‘I’m not going to deceive that girl any further!’ replied Adam.

‘But just look at him Adam,’ pleaded Joe.  He motioned over to where Hoss was gazing up at Isabelle as she sat in her buggy.  His eyes were glazed and his mouth was grinning widely. ‘He’s in love Adam …. You can’t spoil it for him!’

‘He’s in love?’ replied Adam. ‘Don’t be stupid … they just met!  Anyway, how can she love him back when she doesn’t even know who he is?’

‘Just give him a bit of time,’ pleaded Joe. ‘You said it yourself brother …. She’ll like him when she gets to know the true Hoss Cartwright. Can’t you just be Hoss for a bit until that happens?’ Adam hesitated and Joe saw his chance to push his point even further. ‘I woulda thought that you’d do anything for Hoss, seeing as how he admires you enough to want to be you!’ he said triumphantly and saw with pleasure his older brother’s resolve begin to falter. ‘He admires you so much you know older brother. He ain’t asking much Adam …. Just for a bit of time is all.’

Adam sighed in defeat. ‘Only for a little while,’ he muttered. ‘That’s it! If he doesn’t tell her soon then I will!’  He marched over to their buggy as Joe clapped his hands in delight.

==========

‘So this is Isabelle,’ said Ben Cartwright as he extended his hand to her and gave her a warm smile. ‘I’ve been hearing a lot about you from my son …’

‘Adam!’ interrupted Joe.

Ben gave him a puzzled look. ‘Well no actually,’ he said. ‘Adam hasn’t mentioned her.  It was …’

‘It’s a great day fer a picnic ain’t it?’ interrupted Hoss.

‘It certainly is son,’ replied his father. ‘Actually I was wondering if Miss Isabelle would like to join us?  We have plenty to eat.’

Hoss gave his father a horrified look, one that was mirrored by Joe and Adam as well. Joe opened his mouth to speak, but before he could, Isabelle replied. ‘That would be lovely Mr Cartwright … thank you!  It will give me the chance to get to know Adam’s family.’

Ben looked even more confused. ‘Um … yes,’ he said. ‘Over here.’  He indicated to the spot where they’d put their picnic basket under a tree and Hoss immediately walked over Isabelle over to it, followed by a very disgruntled Adam.

Ben caught Joe by the arm. ‘What’s all this about Adam?’ he whispered. ‘I thought that Hoss was the one interested in her?’

Joe thought quickly. ‘I think that she’s kinda got a secret crush on Adam Pa,’ he whispered back. ‘We’re all trying to help her get interested in Hoss instead but.’

‘I see,’ said Ben, not really seeing at all. ‘And what does Adam think of all this?’ He looked over to where his eldest son was glowering unhappily by the tree.

‘He’s happy,’ said Joe airily. ‘He wants Hoss and Isabelle to be together too.  Don’t worry about it Pa.’  He sauntered over to join his brothers and Isabelle.

Ben looked to the sky and shook his head. ‘I’m trying hard to stay out of their love lives,’ he muttered. ‘But sometimes they make it so darned hard … and confusing!’  He sighed as he went over to join the group.

‘So Isabelle,’ he said as they all settled themselves down to eat. ‘I believe that you’ve been seeing a lot of my son lately?’

Isabelle gave him a smile as she took a sandwich. ‘Yes,’ she replied. ‘We have a quite a bit in common. We both love the classics and music so much.’

Ben lifted an eyebrow. ‘You do?’ he asked. ‘I didn’t know that …’

‘I believe that you play the piano Isabelle,’ interrupted Joe quickly. ‘My brother told me that you’re very good at it.’

‘Did he?’ the girl answered. ‘That was very nice of him.’  She gave Hoss a beautiful smile. ‘I do enjoy it so.’

‘What do you like to play?’ asked Adam.

‘Oh … lots of things really.  Bach is a particular favourite of mine. I love the contrapuntal style.  We both do … don’t we?’ she gave Hoss another smile.  Hoss returned it, wondering what the word contrapuntal meant and what it had to do with bark.

‘Really?’ asked Adam, very interested. ‘I enjoy listening to the Preludes and Fugues. Do you play any of them?’

Isabelle lifted an eyebrow in surprise. ‘Why yes I do as a matter of fact.  I’m sorry, but from what I’d heard of you … I didn’t think … I mean … I didn’t know that you’d be interested in that sort of that H ….’

‘He ain’t really,’ interrupted Joe. ‘He’s just trying to learn about that stuff, ain’t you brother?’  He gave Adam a meaningful look and Adam returned it with a dark one of his own.

‘Oh I see.  Well perhaps your brother could help you then,’ replied Isabelle with another beautiful smile at Hoss while Ben continued to look confused.

‘Be glad to,’ said Hoss magnanimously.

‘Oh you are too kind!’ said Adam sarcastically. ‘What would I do without you?’ Hoss looked pleased with himself, failing to pick up on his brother’s sarcasm. Adam turned to Isabelle again. ‘And what are your other favourite composers?’ he asked politely.

‘I love Beethoven,’ gushed Isabelle. ‘And of course Schubert.’

‘Ah Schubert!’ said Adam enthusiastically. ‘Aren’t his Impromptus glorious?’

Isabelle looked pleased. ‘They are!” she said. ‘Perhaps I could play some of them sometime for you Hoss?’

Ben looked startled. ‘I don’t think that Hoss is really interested in that sort of thing,’ he said. ‘Adam is though.’

‘That’s right!’ interrupted Joe. ‘Adam is!  Ain’t ya Adam?’  He nudged Hoss who nodded.

‘Ben looked even more confused. ‘But …’ he began.

‘Pa, ain’t that Doctor Martin over there?’ interrupted Joe quickly. ‘He looks kinda lonely, don’t you think?  Maybe you should go and talk to him?’

Ben looked over. ‘So it is,’ he said, getting up. ‘I’ll go and invite him to join us boys.’

‘Don’t you and Isabelle wanna go for a walk right about now?’ asked Joe, giving Hoss a look as well.

‘Nope,’ replied Hoss happily as he took yet another sandwich. ‘I’m happy here.’  He rubbed his ankle as Joe kicked. ‘Oh … Yeah I guess so,’ he said when the light dawned in his head. ‘You wanna go for a walk Isabelle?’

‘Certainly,’ replied the girl, getting up and joining him. ‘That would be lovely Adam.’

As they walked away, Adam turned to Joe angrily. ‘This has gone on long enough little brother,’ he said. ‘Pa must think we’re all crazy and as for that poor girl …’

‘Don’t you think I didn’t see you looking at her!’ declared Joe, just as angrily, to deflect the attention away from the topic. ‘You was making eyes for her in spite of what you said!’

Adam gave his brother a frustrated look. ‘Well you must admit that she is certainly my type and not Hoss’,’ he said. ‘They have absolutely nothing in common with each other … it’ll never last!’

‘Maybe not, but you said that you wouldn’t interfere!’ declared Joe. ‘You promised to help Hoss.’

‘And I will,’ replied Adam, easily. ‘But I don’t have to like it, do I?  One thing is for sure though little brother.  As soon as they break up …. which I can assure you that they will … I’ll be interested in that girl.’  He watched his brother and Isabelle as they walked along by the lake. ‘I could really go for a girl like that,’ he mused. ‘She’s certainly my type.’

==========

‘Would someone please explain what was going on at the picnic yesterday?’ asked Ben as they all sat at the breakfast table the next morning.

There was silence until Joe finally broke it. ‘What do you mean Pa?’ he asked, putting on his best innocent look.

‘You know exactly what I’m talking about Joseph,’ said Ben sternly. ‘The three of you are obviously up to something.’ He put up his hand. ‘No … on second thought … don’t tell me.  Sometimes it’s best not to know.’ He looked around the table and noted the expressions on his three sons’ faces.  Joe looked decidedly smug … which was always a bad sign …. Hoss looked blissfully happy and Adam … well Adam looked very guilty.  Their father shook his head and continued to eat his breakfast.

Suddenly there was a knock at the door and they all looked at each other. ‘Very early for someone to be calling,’ said Adam.

‘Yes,’ replied his father. ‘It is.’

The knock sounded again and they all looked at Joe who sighed as he got up from the table and went to answer it. ‘Don’t see why I always haveta do it,’ he muttered under his breath as he opened the door to reveal Isabelle standing on the porch. His eyes widened in amazement at the sight of her. ‘Um … hello,’ he said.

‘Hello Joe,’ she replied. ‘I hope it isn’t too early to come calling.’

‘Well, to be honest … ’ he began, half-closing the door as he spoke.

‘Joseph?  Who is it?’

His father called. Joe made a face and opened the door again. ‘Please come in,’ he said grudgingly.

Isabelle swept into the room and smiled at everyone.  ‘Good morning Mr Cartwright … Adam … Hoss.’  She tilted her head in their direction. ‘I hope I’m not inconveniencing you by calling so early.’ She put her hand to her mouth. ‘Oh!  I’m so sorry!  You’re still eating breakfast.’

‘Not at all,’ said Ben as he got up. ‘Please join us for some coffee.’  He held out a chair for her and then seated himself. ‘Joseph?  Are you going to stand there all morning with your mouth open?’ he asked severely, giving his youngest son a stern look.

Joe swallowed and said a silent prayer. ‘Um .. no Pa,’ he said and seated himself as well.

‘I came to give this to Adam,’ said Isabelle as she held out some papers. ‘It’s some sheet music … some of Schubert’s songs.  I thought perhaps that you could practise them and then I could accompany you.’  She held them out to Hoss who sat and stared at them.

‘I’ll take em for him,’ said Joe quickly and reached for the papers, only to have them snatched from his hands by his father.

‘Now exactly what is going on here?’ demanded Ben. ‘One of you come straight out with it please!’

Isabelle looked confused. ‘What on earth do you mean Mr Cartwright?’ she asked. ‘Have I done something wrong?’

‘No my dear … you’ve done nothing wrong,’ he replied with a smile. ‘However I suspect that at least one of my sons has.’  He turned to them again. ‘Well?’ There was silence around the table as each of the three Cartwright boys looked at each other. ‘I’m waiting!’ their father said.

‘Well Pa it’s like this,’ began Adam. He looked across the table at Isabelle and smiled. ‘I’m afraid that my brothers have not exactly been telling you the truth,’ he said apologetically.

‘You didn’t too!’ declared Joe and then shrank back in his seat silently as his father cast him a withering look.

Adam glared at Joe as well. ‘You were the cause of this in the first place,’ he said. ‘You be quiet!’

‘I was not!’ said Joe defensively. ‘If anyone’s to blame then it’s Hoss! He’s the one who said it in the first place!’

‘But I don’t understand,’ said Isabelle. ‘Said what?’

Adam smiled at her again. ‘It seems that both my brothers have led you to believe that my brother Hoss is me,’ he explained. Isabelle continued to look confused, so he continued. ‘I am Adam Cartwright,’ he said and then pointed to Hoss. ‘And this is my brother Hoss.’  Hoss looked at Isabelle with a shamefaced expression and hung his head.

Isabelle looked around the table from one to the other, until her eyes rested on Joe. ‘Are you Joe?’ she asked. ‘Or are you someone else too?’

‘Oh no ma’am,’ Joe assured her. ‘I’m Joe all right.  It’s just them two …’ he indicated his brothers. ‘Them two who haven’t been telling you the truth.’

‘Why you little …’ Hoss reached over the table to grab his younger brother by the collar, but his hand was slapped away again by his father.

‘That will do!’ said Ben sternly.  He looked at Isabelle apologetically. ‘I must say how sorry I am that all of this has happened,’ he said. ‘It seems that my …’ he gave his sons a withering look. ‘… my sons have been very unfair to you. They all need to apologise to you.’ He glanced around the table meaningfully.

‘I’m sorry Miss Isabelle,’ said Hoss immediately. ‘I never shoulda let ya think that I was Adam.’

‘But why did you?’ asked Isabelle, her eyes wide.

‘Well I never thought that you would be interested in someone like me,’ explained Hoss. ‘I’m just a dumb old Hoss ya see …. And when ya assumed that I was Adam … well I guess I just let ya.’

‘He liked you a lot,’ interrupted Joe. ‘He’s even been learning all bout books and music and stuff for you.’

Isabelle nodded. ‘I see.’

‘He used my books and music,’ explained Adam. ‘You see Isabelle .. I’m the one in the family who has the same interests as you do.  I’m interested in literature and music.  Hoss was just pretending to be.’

‘I see.’  Isabelle stood up. ‘I think I might leave now if you don’t mind,’ she said. ‘I need to think about all of this.’

Ben stood up as well. ‘Of course,’ he said kindly and began to walk her to the door. ‘I apologize for my sons’ inconsiderate behaviour Miss,’ he said. ‘They had no right to carry on so.’

‘That’s all right Mr Cartwright,’ the boys heard her say as she left the room. ‘It’s not your fault.’

‘You little weasel!’ said Hoss as the front door closed behind them. ‘He reached over the table and grabbed Joe by the collar who fought in vain to free himself. ‘Making out like you wasn’t involved!’

‘Let go!’ wheezed Joe desperately. ‘I can’t breathe!’

‘Let him go Hoss,’ said Adam. ‘I promise you that he won’t get away with it.’

‘He certainly will not!’ said a stern voice behind them and they all turned to see their father standing there with his hands on his hips and glaring at them. ‘None of you will!’  He sat down at the table. ‘Now … I want this story right from the beginning please! Who is going to start?’

==========

It had been a long week on The Ponderosa, made even longer by Ben’s bad humour and the fact that each of the boys had extra chores to do.  So it was with great relief that they all fronted up to Church the next Sunday, relieved to think that the week was finally over.  As the congregation sang the last hymn, Adam glanced across at Isabelle Morgan and was relieved to see that she returned his smile. Yes sir! he thought to himself. Now that all that nonsense is over we can start fresh.  I’m going to get to know that girl now that Hoss is no longer in the picture.

As soon as the singing had finished and the congregation was making its way out of the church, Adam headed straight for Isabelle. ‘Ma’am,’ he said, tipping his hat. ‘I hope you’ve forgiven the Cartwrights for the misunderstanding last week. I can assure you that my brothers didn’t mean any harm by it.’

Isabelle gave him a lovely smile. ‘I’m sure they didn’t Hoss … sorry, I mean Adam,’ she replied. ‘I’ll have to get used to your correct name now, won’t I?’

Adam gave her a charming smile. ‘Yes, I’m sorry about that,’ he said. ‘I’m sure it won’t take you long though.’ He leant towards her and looked into her lovely blue eyes. ‘I’d certainly like the opportunity to give you the chance to use it a lot more in the future though.’

‘Pardon?’ Isabelle said absently, while looking over his shoulder.

‘I’d like to call on you if you don’t mind,’ he persisted. ‘I think we have a lot in common and …’ he turned to see what she was looking at … and noticed Hoss standing near the front fence. ‘We share the same interests I believe,’ he finished, frowning at her.

‘Pardon?’ Oh yes of course we do,’ said Isabelle. ‘Excuse me please for a moment Hoss … I mean Adam …. But I need to talk to your brother. ‘

‘But …’ Adam held onto her arm. ‘You can’t be serious!’ he said. ‘You can’t still be interested in Hoss!’

‘On the contrary,’ she replied. ‘It seems to me that your brother Hoss must think an awful lot of me to go to all the trouble that he did. The least I can do is give it some time to get to know the real him.’ She gave Adam one of her beautiful smiles before walking over to a very surprised Hoss.

‘Lucked out there didn’t you big brother?’ said a mocking voice behind him and Adam turned to see Joe grinning at him. ‘Thought you said that she wouldn’t be interested in Hoss once she found out the truth? Seems that you were wrong after all.’

Adam’s frown deepened. ‘So it would seem,’ he said dryly. ‘I still don’t understand it though. She and I share the same interests after all …. Hoss couldn’t possibly have anything in common with her!’

Joe shrugged. ‘I think he has something very important in common with her that you’ve missed,’ he said.

‘Oh? And what would that be?’ asked Adam sarcastically.

‘They both share a big interest in Isabelle,’ replied Joe with a grin.

Adam was silent for a moment and then gave a short chuckle as he threw his arm around his younger brother’s shoulder. ‘You know what kid?  Sometimes you amaze me,’ he said.

Joe grinned back at him. ‘Yeah?’ he said. ‘Well its like I always say big brother … I’m a pure ladies man through and through.’  He drew away as Adam’s embrace became a stranglehold on his neck and the two brothers laughed together as they walked towards the Cartwright buggy.

Behind them Ben looked once more to the sky. ‘I’m trying Lord!’ he muttered. ‘I really am!’  He shook his head as he followed his sons to the buggy.

The End