Summary:  Hoss struggles to do the right thing by his childhood friend
Rating:  Teen
Words:  8,300

Many Faces of Love Series

Love Has Many Faces
The Loyalty of Brothers

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The Brandsters have included this story by this author in our project: Preserving Their Legacy. To preserve the legacy of the author, we have decided to give their work a home in the Bonanza Brand Fanfiction Library.  The author will always be the owner of this work of fanfiction, and should they wish us to remove their story, we will.

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Love Has Many Faces
aka The Many Faces of Love

 

Hoss waited patiently for his turn to kiss the bride.

“Cass, you look purdier than a newborn fawn in the Spring,” he grinned as he kissed the young woman affectionately on the cheek.

“And I owe it all to you, Hoss,” Cassandra beamed. “Every bit of happiness I feel at this moment. None of it would have been possible without you.”

“Aw, it weren’t nothin’ I did,” Hoss modestly brushed off the praise. “I git the feelin’ the two of you woulda found each other sooner or later, even without me pokin’ my nose in.”

“But you did poke your nose in,” Bill smiled, joining the conversation as he slipped one arm around his new bride and held out his other hand to shake that of his friend. “And I’ll be forever grateful to you for that, my friend.”

“I’m just glad it worked out as well as it did,” Hoss assured them, returning the handshake. “You’re a lucky man, Bill.”

“Don’t I know it,” Bill replied, looking lovingly into his wife’s eyes. “I never thought I could be as happy as I am at this moment.”

Hoss lowered his gaze discreetly as the newly married couple shared a soft kiss. “I think I’ll check out that there buffet table,” he announced good-naturedly. “I hear tell Mrs. Peters made one of them chocolate cakes of hers.”

“Enjoy yourself,” Bill urged, grinning. “I want everyone in Virginia City to share our happiness tonight.”

Hoss filled his plate and made his way across the room to where his brothers stood near the bar.

“Quite the party, ain’t it?” he smiled, working his fork into the huge slice of chocolate cake.

“I’ll say,” Joe replied distractedly, his gaze following a pretty young woman as she walked by.

“So, brother,” Adam clapped Hoss on the back. “Any regrets?”

“Regrets?” Hoss repeated, his brow furrowed in slight confusion.

“I mean it isn’t every day a man gives up such a pretty lady to another man,” Adam explained, a teasing twinkle in his eye.

“That’s right,” Joe joined in, winking almost imperceptibly at his oldest brother. “Cassandra is a beautiful girl. If I were you, I’d be crying in my beer right about now.”

“Well you ain’t me, little brother,” Hoss returned. “And the both of you can just quit funnin’ me about Cass. There was never nothin’ between us besides friendship.”

“That’s a shame,” Joe replied, once again distracted by the pretty blonde he’d seen earlier. “But I’m not about to make the same mistake. If you two will excuse me, I’m about to strike up a friendship of my own.”

Adam and Hoss watched him walk away. “I’ll bet his new friendship doesn’t last through the reception,” Adam mused.

Hoss took a moment to size up the object of his little brother’s affection. “Five bucks says he gets his face slapped in the next ten minutes.”

Both watched the exchange from across the room. A few minutes later, a wide grin spread across Hoss’ face as Adam grudgingly pulled a crisp bill from his pocket.

**********

“Someone needs to go to Carson City tomorrow,” Ben announced as the four Cartwright men sat down to dinner. “Jack Flinders has that new wagon hitch in, but he won’t be able to deliver it until next week sometime.”

“I’ll pick it up, Pa,” Hoss offered, reaching for the bowl of mashed potatoes.

“Hmmm, I wonder why he volunteered so fast,” Adam mused thoughtfully, eyes narrowed in mock concentration.

“You don’t think it has anything to do with the fact that the Bostal farm is between here and Carson City, do you?” Joe frowned, playing along.

“Naw, it can’t be that,” Adam continued. “I mean, it’s only been a few months. Surely he can’t be missing Cass that much already.”

“I don’t know,” Joe bantered. “After all, when he introduced them, he never figured on Bill moving his business to Carson City. I reckon he thought he’d be seeing a lot more of his dear friend after the wedding.”

“Cut it out, you two,” Hoss cut off the exchange, unable to hide a small smile of amusement. “It just so happens that I’ve been meaning to pay Bill and Cass a little visit. Tomorrow seems like a good a time as any.”

“I think it’s a perfect time,” Ben agreed, smiling. “Just don’t forget the wagon hitch.”

“I won’t, Pa,” Hoss grinned. Then, looking across the table at his brothers, he added, “I’m just sorry I won’t be able to get to mendin’ that fence up in the north pasture. I reckon it was going to take me most of the day.”

Joe swallowed hard and looked first at Adam and then at their father. “I don’t suppose it will still be waiting when he gets back,” he attempted sheepishly.

“No,” Ben replied, locking a stern gaze with that of his youngest son. “I don’t suppose it will.”

Joe offered a cross between a half-hearted smile and a grimace to his smirking brother. “Give my best to Bill and Cass,” he murmured in defeat.

**********

Hoss picked up the wagon hitch and chatted with Jack Flinders, exchanging news and greetings from the Ponderosa for tales of the goings-on in Carson City.

“I’d best be on my way,” he finally stated, shaking hands with the other man. “I plan on stoppin’ by the Bostal place on my way back.”

“Do tell,” Jack frowned slightly. “Haven’t seen hide nor hair of Bill Bostal for the better part of a week.”

“You ain’t?” Hoss asked, obviously disturbed by the news. “What about the blacksmith shop?”

“He hired young Cody Bremmer to help him out about a month ago,” Jack shrugged. “Bill started coming to town less and less. Like I said, he hasn’t been here for days.”

“Has anybody been out to check on things?” Hoss asked.

“Not likely,” Jack returned. “Bill’s not the same man he was when he got here, Hoss. I think a lot of things have changed out there at the Bostal place. I doubt he’s there anyway. Been hanging out with a rowdy crowd from what I hear.”

“You don’t say,” Hoss mused thoughtfully. Then, offering a small smile, he added, “Well, I guess I’ll know what’s goin’ on soon enough. Thanks, Jack.”

“Always glad to have Ponderosa business,” Jack smiled. “Give your pa and brothers my best.”

Hoss nodded before turning toward his horse. With thoughts of concern for his friends and what he’d learn upon reaching the Bostal farm, he mounted and headed for the one place he was likely to find answers.

**********

He was slightly surprised to see how run-down the farm looked. He’d always known Bill to be a hard worker and the obvious neglect tightened the knot of worry he was already feeling deep in his stomach.

He almost didn’t expect an answer to his knock at the door. Glancing around the unkempt property, he got the eerie feeling that the place had been deserted long ago.

When the door opened slowly, it took him a moment to recognize the woman before him.

“Cass?” he breathed in obvious surprise and concern. “What in tarnation happened?”

Cassandra blinked a few times against the afternoon sun before a small flicker of recognition dawned in her once sparkling eyes. “Hoss.” She forced a slight smile as one hand self-consciously went to the yellow-tinged bruise on her cheek. “It’s nothing, really. Please, come in.”

Hoss brushed past her into the kitchen, turning to face her as she closed the door behind him. “It’s been a long while,” he began. “It’s good to see you.”

With a nervous laugh, she fidgeted with the dull hair that had once boasted such lustre. “I wasn’t expecting company,” she explained quietly. “I’m afraid I must be a sight. I’ve been cleaning.” She allowed the words to trail off.

“Still purdy as a picture in my books,” Hoss graciously replied.

The smile she offered seemed more genuine this time. “Please, sit down. Can I get you some coffee?”

She was already hurrying to fill a cup as he took a seat at the table. “Bill’s not here right now,” she explained hurriedly. “Since we moved, he’s been putting in longer and longer hours. I guess that’s the way it is when you open a new business.”

Hoss was quiet for a moment. “I just came from Carson City,” he finally informed her. “Bill hasn’t been there in nearly a week.”

She looked surprised for a moment before allowing a nervous laugh. “You must be mistaken, Hoss,” she countered. “Where else would he be?”

He took in her pallid complexion and the dark circles under her eyes that seemed to stand out in stark contrast. “I was only there a few minutes,” he finally admitted, forcing a smile of his own. “Maybe I just missed him.”

“He’ll be home in time for supper,” she continued, trying to ignore the hint of disbelief in his eyes. “You will join us, won’t you, Hoss? It’s been so long since I’ve seen a friendly face.”

“When did you ever know me to turn down a home-cooked meal?” he joked.

“Good,” she breathed in relief. “I know Bill will want to see you. I’ll just go fetch some water and I’ll start dinner straight away.”

“I’ll get the water,” he offered, getting up from his seat.

She hesitated briefly. “I’m afraid the pump is broken. Bill’s been meaning to fix it, but he’s just been so busy.” Again, her voice trailed off, leaving Hoss to wonder what it was that she was leaving unspoken. “You’ll have to go to the stream,” she finished.

He took the bucket she offered, but paused as he reached the door. Turning to face her once again, he posed the question uppermost on his mind. “You never did explain that there bruise on your face,” he stated solemnly.

“Oh, that,” she laughed, touching her cheek gingerly. “It was silly, really. The stove lid was stuck and when I finally managed to pry it free, it came up and caught me in the side of the face. You know how clumsy I can be. Bill’s always saying that I should leave that sort of thing until he gets home.”

Hoss seemed to contemplate the explanation for a moment. “Maybe he’s right,” he finally smiled. “I’ll go fetch that water.”

**********

It was a fairly long walk to the stream. Hoss had to wonder why Bill hadn’t fixed the pump or dug a new well. It wasn’t like him to let such things go, especially when it meant that his wife would have to make such a trip a few times a day carrying heavy buckets of water. He resolved to ask Cass a few more questions when he got back to the house.

As he neared the verandah, he noticed Bill’s horse tied beside his own. A sudden cry caused him to drop the bucket he carried and hurry toward the distressful sound. Just as he burst through the door, he saw Cassandra cowering in a corner, Bill standing above her with his hand raised.

“Bill!” he called, causing the other man to turn in his direction. It was easy to see that he was drunk. His eyes were bloodshot and his balance wavered precariously as he squinted in Hoss’ direction.

“What are you doin’ here, Cartwright?” he sneered, his words slurred together. “Come to see how us poor folk live?”

“That’s enough, Bill,” Hoss stated forcefully, his voice low and menacing. “You’re drunk.”

“Yeah, I’m drunk,” Bill agreed, staggering toward him. “But not to drunk to see what’s goin’ on here. You thought you’d just amble in while I was at work. Is that the way you Cartwrights do things? Wait until the husband is off makin’ an honest livin’ before you come in flashin’ your money and power?”

“I came to see the both of you,” Hoss stated in a flat tone. “Looks to me like I shoulda bin here a might sooner.”

“You’re not welcome here, Hoss,” Bill shouted, causing Cassandra to flinch in fear. “Don’t you get it? I don’t need you comin’ in here tellin’ me how to deal with what’s mine.”

“You’re not gonna hit her again,” Hoss informed him tersely. “If you wanna hit someone, try me on for size.”

Bill seemed to be thinking about his options for a moment. “Heck, Hoss,” he finally grinned. “Seems what we’ve got here is a little misunderstandin’. I was just helpin’ her up when you came in.” Turning to where his wife still stood against the wall, he encouraged her to agree with him. “Isn’t that right, Cass? Tell Hoss how yur always fallin’ over stuff.”

She eyed him for a moment before lowering her gaze to the floor. “He’s right, Hoss,” she practically whispered. “Sometimes I lose my balance.”

“You don’t have to lie fer him,” Hoss cut her off, his gaze still fixed on the man before him. “He ain’t gonna hurt you no more, Cass.”

Bill seemed to take offense to the words. “Why, you.” he grated, angrily lunging at the larger man.

Hoss sidestepped the blow and landed one of his own on the man’s jaw, sending him crashing into the table. In an instant, Bill was on his feet and at him again, moving with a speed that surprised Hoss considering the obvious state of inebriation the other man was in. Once more, he ducked the punch Bill swung at him and delivered a solid right to the jaw.

“That’s enough, Bill!” he ordered, as the man struggled to get to his feet. “I ain’t gonna fight you in the state you’re in.”

“Well it looks to me like you’re gonna have to, Cartwright,” Bill replied with a feral grin. He lunged at his one-time friend again, this time holding a knife he’d managed to grab from the table.

Hoss grabbed his wrist easily and applied pressure until the weapon dropped to the ground. Once the wild man was unarmed, Hoss pushed him roughly away in a combination of anger and disdain.

Bill tried to regain his balance but the mixture of alcohol in his system and Hoss’ sheer strength rendered him unable. Cursing Hoss under his breath, he lost the fight for control and fell backwards, arms flailing wildly.

Hoss cringed slightly as he saw the man’s head hit the corner of the stove as he fell. As angry as he was, he hadn’t meant to hurt him, at least not until he was sober enough to realize what was happening and why. Rushing to the still form on the floor, he gingerly turned the man over, noting with dismay the blood oozing from a gaping head wound.

“Bill?” he called softly, slapping the other man’s cheek in an attempt to bring him out of what he hoped was nothing more than a drunken stupor. When he received no response, he tentatively touched the side of Bill’s neck, praying that he’d feel a pulse. After a moment, he raised his blue eyes, now clouded with regret and disbelief. “He’s dead, Cass,” he stated softly.

Cassandra looked at Hoss for a moment, unable to register his words. “No,” she breathed, kneeling beside her husband’s body. “Bill,” she whispered intently. “Bill, I’m sorry. Please, just open your eyes.”

Without a word, Hoss took her by the arm and pulled her gently to her feet. As the reality of the situation sank in, she began to cry, hysterically calling to her husband to open his eyes.

“I’m sorry, Cass,” Hoss murmured, taking her in his arms in an attempt to comfort her. “I didn’t mean it to turn out this way.”

After a few moments, Cassandra managed to calm herself somewhat. “It’s all my fault,” she whimpered. “I shouldn’t have made him angry. I know better.”

“Now you just hush,” Hoss cut her off in a stern but gentle voice. “None of this here is your fault.” He held her at arms length to study her face. In addition to the bruise he’d already seen, there was a new mark on the other side of her face. He knew that in a matter of hours it would change from angry red to tinges of purple and black. “How long has this been going on, Cass?” he asked grimly.

Cassandra shook her head. “I don’t know what you mean, Hoss,” she began. “I . we.”

“How long has he bin hittin’ you like this?” Hoss clarified.

“It’s not his fault,” she hurriedly tried to assure him. “Sometimes I do things, things he doesn’t like. Sometimes I’m too lazy or I don’t cook the right things. I’m his wife, Hoss. It’s my job to look after him, to learn to do things his way.” Her bottom lip began to tremble. “I failed him, Hoss.”

“I don’t wanna hear none of that talk,” Hoss reprimanded her softly. “You can’t blame yourself fer what he’s done. No kinda man treats his wife this way, no matter how she does or doesn’t do things. This is on him, Cass. He brought it on himself.”

She thought about his words for a moment, her expression one of confusion and pain. “What am I going to do, Hoss?” she finally whispered in a weak voice. “Please, help me. I don’t know what to do.”

As she broke into a fresh torrent of tears, he pulled her close once again, gently rubbing her back while she cried. “Don’t you worry none,” he assured her quietly. “I’ll help you, Cass.”

**********

After burying the body on the farm, Hoss packed the few possessions she had and waited while she stood beside the grave and said her private goodbyes. He felt a tug at his heart, knowing that he’d been at least partially responsible for her pain.

The ride to the Ponderosa started off silently, but gradually, Cassandra began to fill Hoss in on all that had happened since she’d seen him last. She talked about Bill and his penchant for gambling and drinking. Trying to make him understand, she explained how it had started so gradually, a drink or two in town with his new friends after a hard day’s work. She hadn’t even noticed the problem getting worse until he started coming home drunk. Soon it was a regular occurrence and she had tried to make him see what was happening to him.

That’s when he had hit her the first time. From then on, she learned to avoid confronting him about his behaviour. But soon, that wasn’t enough. He’d found other reasons to hit her. No matter how hard she tried, or what she did, it was never enough. She just couldn’t seem to make him happy anymore. Every night he’d tell her how she’d failed to measure up, how she’d gone back on her promise to love, honour and obey. Every day she’d try harder and every night he’d come home and take out his disappointment on her.

As he lost more and more of their savings at the poker tables, he began to resent anyone who had money, even those he’d once considered his friends. He’d told her on more than one occasion that the Cartwrights were the worst of the bunch, always flaunting what they had in the face of those who were without. He was bitter and angry and she had often wondered how much of that anger was directed at himself for the man he’d become, though she’d never had the courage to voice her thoughts.

The one time she’d tried to stand up for her friends, to remind him of how generous the Cartwrights had been to people they knew, he’d erupted in something akin to a jealous frenzy, slapping her and warning her never to use the word Cartwright in their house again.

“I’d hoped that seeing you would remind him of the friendship you once shared,” she admitted weakly. “If I’d known how he was going to act, I would never have asked you to stay.”

“Why didn’t you tell someone?” Hoss asked as she finished her story.

“How could I?,” she shrugged meekly. “I couldn’t go back to Virginia City and let everyone know that I had failed as a wife. Besides, if Bill had found out I’d left the farm, he’d have come after me. It would have only made matters worse.”

Hoss glanced sideways at her, noting the large bruise that had deepened under her eye. “Can’t see as it could have bin much worse,” he muttered.

“You don’t understand,” she forced a smile. “Despite everything, I never stopped loving him, Hoss. I promised to stand by him, through better or worse and that’s what I intended to do.”

Hoss was silent for a moment. “You’re right about one thing, Cass,” he finally murmured. “I guess I don’t understand.”

**********

Hoss was slightly relieved when he arrived at the house and found it empty except for Hop Sing, who was busy in the kitchen.

“Mista Ben go to town,” the cook explained. “Take number one son and number three son.”

“That’s fine, Hop Sing,” Hoss replied. “We’re gonna have a house guest for a while. Could you make up the guest room?”

“Guest room all ready,” Hop Sing explained with a smile. “Hop Sing change sheets just this morning. One a week I change sheets, just in case. Cartlights have many house guest.”

“Thanks,” Hoss smiled, patting the small man on the back. “I’ll show Cass to her room.”

“Missy Cass?” Hop Sing beamed. “Hop Sing not see her for many months.”

“She’ll be stayin’ here a spell,” Hoss explained. Then, in an attempt to warn the oriental man, he added, “She’s bin through a rough time. Her husband’s dead.”

“Hop Sing take care,” the cook assured him, already moving through the doorway to where the guest waited in the parlour.

“Missy Cass!” he beamed, discreetly not commenting on her appearance. “Good to see you.”

“It’s good to see you too, Hop Sing,” Cass smiled genuinely. “I hope it’s no imposition.”

“Neva imposition,” Hop Sing stated firmly. “Hop Sing show you to your room. Have Mista Hoss bring water for nice warm bath.”

“I’ll get right on it,” Hoss grinned gratefully. In a moment, he was gone, leaving his friend in the care of the man who was already fussing over her.

**********

“I just don’t understand it,” Ben stated, shaking his head as Hoss recounted the story. “That doesn’t sound like Bill Bostal at all.”

“I know, Pa,” Hoss sighed wearily. “But I saw it with my own two eyes. He was drunker than a fox in a whiskey vat. Cass says he’s done gambled away the business and near everything else they owned.”

“Bill’s always been prone to the influence of others,” Adam pointed out quietly. “I guess his new friends in Carson City were just the wrong sort to fall in with.”

“It takes more than bad influence to change a man that much,” Ben added. “Drinking and gambling are one thing, but to treat Cass that way, well that’s got to be something that’s always in a man, maybe just waiting for the right trigger to set it off. I guess in the time we knew him, we just never dreamed that he was capable of this.”

“I can’t see Cass just accepting that,” Joe interjected grimly. “I always thought of her as a strong woman.”

“I guess it’s a little like breakin’ a horse, Joe,” Hoss offered in way of an explanation. “After hearin’ day after day that yer just not good enough, I guess maybe you start to believin’ in it. He done broke her spirit. She truly believes she got no more than what was comin’ to her.”

“That’s sad,” Joe breathed, shaking his head slowly.

“Yes,” Ben mused thoughtfully, “Very sad indeed.”

“I told her she could stay here, Pa,” Hoss pointed out. “Least wise till she decides what she wants to do.”

“Of course,” Ben waved his hand as though in dismissal of the comment. “But she’s going to need more than just a place to stay. She’s going to need reassurance and understanding. It won’t be easy to undo months of emotional damage in a few days.”

“Understanding is something we’ve never been short of around here,” Adam assured their father. “Don’t worry, Pa, we won’t do anything to upset her further.”

Ben looked up at his three sons. “I know you won’t,” he assured them with a proud smile.

**********

Days turned to weeks and the Cartwrights were relieved to see a glimmer of the girl they’d once known in their meek houseguest.

“I’ve got the rest of the day off,” Hoss announced to Cass just before mid-day. “How about we take a picnic basket up to the lake.”

“Sounds nice,” she smiled. “I could use some fresh air.”

“I’ll have Hop Sing prepare something,” Hoss nodded, grinning. “I sure do like a picnic. Fried chicken and apple pie.”

His smile faded as he watched her put a hand to her stomach. “What is it, Cass?”

She closed her eyes against the nausea she was feeling. After a moment, she opened them again, offering a fragile smile. “It’s nothing, Hoss,” she tried to assure him. “For a moment, the thought of food just didn’t appeal to me, I guess.”

“Maybe we’d best put that picnic off for another time,” he suggested.

“If you don’t mind, I think that might be a good idea after all,” she agreed with a small nod. “I think I’d like to rest for a while.”

Hoss watched her as she made her way toward the staircase. After seeing her take a couple of steps, he noticed her stop and sway. He was at her side in a heartbeat, scooping her up in his arms as her legs seemed to buckle beneath her.

“Hop Sing!” he shouted. When the small man appeared in the kitchen doorway, he nodded to the girl in his arms. “Could ya bring some water and a compress?”

“Light away, Mista Hoss,” Hop Sing replied, already scurrying back into the kitchen.

Just as Hoss turned to take her upstairs, the front door opened. “Joe, get Doc Martin out here,” he instructed.

Joe hesitated only a moment, taking in the scene before him before hurrying out the door to where Cochise waited.

**********

The four Cartwright men waited anxiously while Doc Martin examined Cass. As he made his way down the stairs, Hoss hurried to meet him. “How is she?” he asked in obvious concern.

“She’ll be fine,” the doctor sighed. “She just fainted.”

“That’s a relief,” Hoss sighed. “After all she’s bin through, I thought it might be somethin’ serious.”

“That depends on your definition of serious,” the doctor continued. “She’s with child, Hoss. Given the circumstances of her marriage and the trauma she’s been through, I’m not sure how she’s going to handle this emotionally.”

Hoss was silent for a moment as he allowed the words to register. “A baby? When?”

“I’d say in about six months,” Doc Martin answered. “She’s going to need to rest for a few days and keep up her strength. No strenuous activities and no riding. From what you’ve told me, she must have been pregnant while he was beating her.”

Hoss swallowed hard, anger evident in the grim set of his lips. “Does she know?” he asked quietly.

“She does,” Doc Martin nodded. “But I’m not sure the reality of it has set in at this point.”

“Can I see her?” Hoss asked.

“For a few minutes,” the doctor replied. “But then I want her to have something to eat and get some rest.”

Hoss nodded and thanked the doctor before moving past him and up the stairs.

Once he was out of sight, Doc Martin turned to Ben. “Has she made any plans?”

“She talked about maybe moving to San Francisco,” Ben shrugged. “She has an aunt and uncle out there. I’m not sure what she’ll do now, though. She’s in no shape to make that kind of trip.”

“If she regains her stength and there are no further problems, she may be OK to travel by stage,” the doctor informed him. “In my opinion, if she hasn’t lost it by now, especially given what she’s already been through in the first months, she’s got a good chance of carrying it to term. On the other hand, if God has any intention of terminating this pregnancy prematurely, it’ll happen whether she’s in bed or not. It might be easier for her to be with family when the baby is born.”

“I understand,” Ben nodded. “We’ll have to wait and see how well she does and what she wants.”

“If she has any pain or discomfort, send for me right away,” Doc Martin instructed as he put on his hat and shook the hands of the three Cartwright men. “Good luck.”

**********

Hop Sing had taken up a light lunch and Hoss brought the tray back down when she was finished. “She managed to eat a little,” he told his father. “She’s resting now.”

“Good,” Ben nodded. “How’s she dealing with all of this?”

Hoss put the tray on the table and took a deep breath. “I don’t know, Pa,” he admitted. “She’s tryin’ to stay positive, but there’s such a sadness there.”

“It won’t be easy,” Ben agreed. “Raising a child alone never is.”

Hoss was silent for a moment. “I wanted to talk to you about that, Pa,” he finally stated in a low voice. “I don’t think Cass will have to raise that baby by herself.”

Ben gleaned the meaning of the words from his son’s tone of voice and the serious expression on his face. “What are you saying, son?” he asked anyway.

“I’m gonna marry her, Pa,” Hoss stated. “It’s my fault she’s in this predicament in the first place. If I hadn’t introduced her to Bill, they never woulda got married and she wouln’t be layin’ up there right now.”

“Hoss,” Ben began in a soothing, yet firm voice.

“Pa, I’ve given it a lot of thought,” Hoss cut him off. “I feel responsible for her. First I got them together and then I killed him. I can’t just send her off to have that baby by herself.”

Ben thought about his son’s words for a moment. “All the time you were growing up,” he began cautiously, “did you ever think of marrying Cass yourself?”

“Well, no,” Hoss admitted, “but things are different now.”

“Yes,” Ben nodded, “Yes, they are but I want you to think about something before you make any definite decisions. That girl up there has been through a lot. She deserves the chance to find someone to share her life with, someone who loves her as a woman, not just as a friend. Guilt and a sense of obligation are poor substitutes for that kind of love, son.”

Hoss considered the words only briefly before shaking his head. “It’s more than that, Pa. I can give her and her baby a happy life. That’s all I want right now, to see her happy. Is that so wrong?”

“Of course not,” Ben replied quietly, placing a hand on his son’s shoulder. “And neither is it wrong for me to want the same for you. I’m just not sure a marriage based on a foundation such as this can produce that kind of happiness.”

“I reckon that’s just a chance I’ll have to take,” Hoss replied after a moment. “I’m gonna ask her just as soon as she’s up to it.” Without another word, he grabbed his hat and headed for the front door. Ben closed his eyes and breathed a weary sigh as he heard the door close.

**********

“You might just as well know,” Hoss informed his brothers at dinner that night. “I’ve already told Pa that as soon as Cass is feelin’ better, I’m gonna ask her to marry me.”

“You’re what?” Joe asked in surprise, holding the platter of steak in mid-air as he gaped at his brother. “Hoss, that’s crazy!”

Adam took in Hoss’ angry expression before turning a raised eyebrow toward his youngest brother. Taking the plate from Joe, he tried to smooth things over. “I’m sure what our little brother means is, have you thought this through? Do you think that’s what’s best for either of you?”

“I have,” Hoss nodded, dropping his gaze to the food on his plate as he busied himself with cutting the meat. “I just can’t leave her alone like this, not with a baby on the way. If it weren’t for me, maybe they wouldn’t have gotten married. Least wise, Bill would still be alive.”

“You can’t blame yourself for that,” Adam tried to assure him. “If it weren’t for you, Bill could have gone on hurting her, he may even have ended up killing her.”

“Adam’s right,” Joe added. “You did what you had to do. You didn’t mean to kill him.”

“But I did,” Hoss reminded them. “And because I did, there’s a young woman lyin’ up there with a baby on the way and no husband.”

Ben listened intently to the exchange, hoping Hoss would be more receptive to his brothers’ words than he had been to his own.

“I know you feel badly about what happened,” Adam went on, “But that’s no reason to jump into a marriage that you wouldn’t have wanted otherwise.”

“Look!” Hoss exploded, pushing back his chair and standing up, leaving his food untouched. “I’m plumb tired of havin’ everyone try to tell me what I should or shouldn’t be feelin’. I’ve made up my mind and nothin’ you can say is gonna change that, so I’d appreciate if you’d just keep to yer own business and let me tend to mine.”

The three still seated at the table were taken aback by the uncustomary outburst and could only watch with a sense of shock as Hoss left through the front door, slamming it loudly behind him.

“Pa, I only meant.” Adam began.

“I know,” Ben cut him off with a wave of his hand. “You had the best intentions, as did I when I tried to talk to him earlier.”

“So what are we supposed to do?” Joe asked. “Stand by and watch him make a big mistake?”

“Sometimes, that’s the hardest part of loving someone,” Ben sighed. “Whether or not we agree with his decision, we need to support Hoss. Cass is a nice girl. None of us would have objected had Hoss asked her to marry him a year ago.”

“But that was before Hoss told us that he never thought of her as anything more than a friend,” Adam pointed out. “Knowing that, how are we supposed to act like we agree with this marriage?”

“By doing what this family has always done,” Ben stated firmly. “Being there for one another. If it’s a mistake, he’ll realize it sooner or later and he’ll need our support. On the other hand, maybe they’ll have a very happy life together.”

Joe and Adam exchanged looks of pure scepticism while Ben concentrated on his food trying hard not to notice.

**********

Adam and Joe were working in the barn after dinner. “What do you think?” Joe asked his older brother.

“He doesn’t love her,” Adam stated matter-of-factly. “Not the way a husband loves a wife.”

“I know,” Joe sighed. “He’s marrying her out of a misplaced sense of guilt.”

“He’s doing what he considers to be the honourable thing,” Adam added. “I guess we can’t really fault him for that.”

“If only he’d give it some time,” Joe lamented. “It’s just all so sudden.”

“I think I’ll try to talk to him once he calms down a little,” Adam suggested.

“But Pa said.”

“I know what Pa said,” Adam countered. “But he’s our brother. Do you want to see him make a mistake that could affect the rest of his life?”

“Of course not,” Joe agreed.

“Well, since I’m the most level-headed of the two of us, I think I should be the one to talk to him, don’t you agree?”

Joe had to allow a smile. “I guess I can’t argue that,” he admitted. “Besides, if he’s gonna take a swing at one of us, I’d just as soon it be you.”

Both men chuckled briefly at the thought. Unfortunately, Hoss happened into the barn in time to catch only the last part of the conversation.

“I’m glad to see my life is such a source of amusement to the both of you,” he muttered angrily.

“Hoss, we.” Joe tried to explain.

“Save it, Joseph,” Hoss snapped, “I guess I shouldn’t have expected more from you.” Then turning to Adam, he added, “But you, I thought you were different.”

“Hoss.” Adam began, only to be cut off as his younger brother had.

“I guess I was expectin’ too much to hope that you’d trust me to make the right decision. I may not be real smooth with the ladies but I know my own mind. Maybe the two of you have forgotten, but I have feelin’s too, and I don’t reckon I much like havin’ em’ trampled into the dust.”

“Hoss, we’re sorry,” Joe apologized. “Of course we care about your feelings.”

“We just don’t want to see you make a mistake,” Adam added sincerely.

“The way I see it, it’s my mistake to make,” Hoss informed them flatly.

“We just can’t stand to see you blame yourself for the actions of someone like Bill Bostal,” Adam tried to explain. “He’s just not worth it, Hoss.”

“Cass is worth it,” Hoss replied, “and that young’un is worth it. That’s good enough for me.”

“Is it?” Joe countered angrily, grabbing his brother’s arm as he turned to leave the barn. “Or do you think that marrying Cass is going to change everything? It won’t chane the fact that he hit her and it won’t change the fact that he’s dead.”

He didn’t even see the backhand coming until it connected with the side of his face, sending him crashing into the nearest stall.

Hoss looked from Joe to Adam and back again. “I guess it’s times like this when you find out what folks are really made of,” he muttered angrily. “And if you can’t get behind the decision I’ve made, you’re not the brothers I thought you were.”

With that he turned and headed for the house.

Silently, Adam helped Joe to his feet.

“I never thought I’d hear Hoss say that,” Joe said, his voice laden with hurt and sorrow as he wiped a thin trickle of blood from his mouth with the back of one hand.

Adam clapped the younger man on the shoulder in an attempt to reassure him. “He didn’t mean it, Joe. He’s hurting right now. He’ll get over it.”

Joe looked through the open doorway toward the house, his chest heaving in a huge sigh. “I hope you’re right, brother.”

Despite their efforts to mend things with their brother, Adam and Joe found Hoss’ manner to be continually cool toward them throughout the evening and into the following day.

Joe approached his father the next afternoon. “I’ve finished all I need to do around here today,” he announced in a dejected voice. “If it’s all right with you, I think I’ll ride into town for a few hours. I won’t be home for dinner.”

Ben frowned at the tone of voice. “Something wrong, Joe?”

Joe looked up as Hoss came down the stairs and headed for the kitchen, nodding a greeting at his father while at the same time refusing to acknowledge Joe’s presence.

“I just need to get away for a while,” Joe answered his father’s question once Hoss disappeared through the kitchen doorway. “Suddenly, the Ponderosa just doesn’t seem quite big enough.”

Ben frowned at the words as he watched his younger son leave through the front door. When Hoss came through from the kitchen, carrying a tray, he called to him.

“Hoss, can I talk to you for a moment?”

“I was just on my way to take this up to Cass,” Hoss explained.

“It’ll just take a moment,” Ben assured him. He waited until Hoss had put the tray down before continuing. “I don’t think I like what I’m seeing between you and your brothers,” he said. “You’ve barely spoken a word to either of them all day.”

“I done said all I wanted to last night when I found them out in the barn discussing me and my mistakes,” Hoss replied grimly. “I used to think I could count on them for anything, Pa.”

“I think you still can,” Ben informed him in a stern but gentle voice. “They love you, son. They only want what’s best for you, just as I do.”

“They sure got a funny way of showin’ it,” Hoss replied.

“Perhaps,” Ben acknowledged with a slight nod, “But on the other hand, I think maybe trying to talk someone you love out of doing something you think is bad for them might just be the perfect way of showing it.”

“They’ve got no business stickin’ their noses where they don’t belong,” Hoss replied stubbornly.

“Is that what’s really bothering you?” Ben challenged. “Haven’t you boys always told each other what you think, whether it’s right or wrong? Have you ever hesitated to tell either one of your brothers when you thought they were making a mistake?”

“This is different, Pa,” Hoss began.

“Is it?” Ben asked, eyebrows raised. “What makes it different, Hoss?”

“It just is,” Hoss replied, at a loss for an explanation.

“Is it because you already know it’s a mistake?” Ben asked quietly. “Is that what makes this situation so different from all the other times you and your brothers have looked out for one another?”

Hoss seemed to be considering the words before lowering himself slowly into the chair opposite his father. “Pa, it’s just so frustrating,” he admitted. “There’s a part of me that feels what I’m doing is right.”

“But?” Ben prodded.

Hoss heaved a heavy sigh. “But deep down, I know that I wouldn’t have married her a year ago,” he admitted. “I’m just so torn up about everything that’s happened. When I think of Bill hittin’ her like that, I just get plumb crazy. I keep reminding myself that it was me who put her in that position.”

“You aren’t responsible for Bill’s actions,” Ben reminded him. “And the two of them would have met sooner or later, even without your help. How do you know they wouldn’t have fallen in love and gotten married anyway?”

“It isn’t just that, Pa,” Hoss lamented. “I didn’t see what he was capable of, that’s part of it, but even when I did, I let my temper get the best of me instead of realizing that he needed help. If I hadn’t pushed him, he’d be alive today.”

“What happened was an accident,” Ben reminded him firmly. “Unfortunate, yes, but an accident nonetheless. You can’t spend the rest of your life paying for that.”

“But I can spend it makin’ her happy,” Hoss added. “If she’ll have me, that’s what I intend to do.”

“So you’re intent on dedicating your entire life to making up for the actions of another?” Ben asked, trying to make a point. “Regardless of what it costs you?”

“I have to, Pa,” Hoss said quietly. “Otherwise I reckon I couldn’t live with my own actions.”

When Ben didn’t have a ready reply, Hoss added, “I guess I’d best get that tray up to her.”

Ben watched him go, heaving a sigh of frustration.

**********

Cass was sitting up in bed when Hoss entered the room.

“You’re lookin’ a might spryer than you were,” Hoss smiled, placing the tray on her bed.

“I’m feeling much better,” she replied, returning the smile. “Hoss, I really need to talk to you.”

“What you really need is to finish up this broth,” Hoss corrected. “You need to keep up your strength. You heard the doctor, many small meals throughout the day. Besides, Hop Sing will skin me alive if I take this tray down and it ain’t empty.”

“It’s important, Hoss,” she said, holding his gaze intently.

Hoss sat beside her on the bed. “What is it, Cass?” he asked, his brow furrowed in a serious expression.

“I didn’t mean to eavesdrop,” she began. “But I heard part of the conversation you had with your father.”

“Cass, I don’t want.”

“Let me finish,” she cut him off. “I heard what you said, Hoss, and I appreciate your intentions, I really do.”

“We can do it, Cass,” he smiled. “We can get married and give that baby of yours a good home.”

“But that’s just it,” she smiled sadly. “You’d be a good father, Hoss, but this baby is Bill’s.”

“I don’t understand,” Hoss frowned.

“When we were younger,” she began in a soft voice. “I did have a crush on you, Hoss Cartwright.” She smiled at the slightly embarrassed look on his face. “But it was plain to me that you didn’t feel the same way. You’re a wonderful friend, and I thank God that I have you in my life, but you don’t love me, not the way a man should love a woman.”

“But I.”

“I know you’d try your best to make me happy,” she assured him. “But in the end, it wouldn’t be fair, not to you, not to me and especially not to the baby.”

Hoss hung his head as he listened to her words. “So what do you plan to do?” he asked, raising his eyes to meet hers.

“I think I’d like to go to San Francisco to stay with my aunt and uncle, at least until the baby is born. There are still so many memories around here. Memories of who I was and what Bill and I became together.”

“You can’t blame.”

“I don’t blame myself for what he did,” she assured him. “And neither can you. But I still wrestle with my own perceptions of what marriage should be. I thought I was a bad wife because he had to hit me, because I couldn’t make him happy. Your family has been wonderful, but you can’t possibly understand the way I feel. Only another woman really can.”

“Your aunt,” Hoss concluded.

“They always told me I had a home there if I needed it,” she said. “I think I need it now more than ever.”

“If that’s what you want,” he replied quietly. “You know I won’t stand in your way.”

“And I won’t stand in yours,” she added. “That’s why I can’t marry you, Hoss. I hope you understand.”

He allowed a smile as he kissed her gently on the cheek. “I only want what’s best for you,” he assured her.

“I know,” she smiled. “And I think I’ll always love you for that.”

“I’ll send a wire to your aunt and uncle first thing in the morning,” he offered.

“Thank you, Hoss,” she smiled, hugging him affectionately. “For everything.”

**********

When Joe returned from town hours later, Hoss was waiting for him in the parlour. “I’ve bin waitin’ to talk to you,” Hoss informed him, a serious expression on his face.

Joe took a deep breath, steeling himself for what was to come. “Go ahead,” he replied.

“In a minute,” Hoss put him off. Going to the stairway, he called up to Adam.

Once the three of them were together, Hoss spoke his mind. “I owe you both an apology,” he began. “I was too stubborn and pig-headed to see that you were just tryin’ to help.”

Adam and Joe glanced at each other, exchanging small smiles of obvious relief. “We owe you an apology too, brother,” Adam admitted. “We should have been behind you, even if we didn’t agree with your decision.”

“We just didn’t want to see you get hurt,” Joe added.

“I know that,” Hoss nodded, “And I appreciate it. The truth is, you two are the best brothers a man could want for, even if you do get a might annoyin’ at times.”

“Does that mean we’re in the wedding party?” Joe asked hopefully.

“There ain’t gonna be a wedding,” Hoss explained. “Cass is going to San Francisco to be with her aunt and uncle just as soon as Doc Martin gives her the go ahead to travel.”

“I’m sorry,” Adam frowned slightly. “I know you wanted things to turn out differently.”

“I just want her to be happy, Adam,” Hoss explained wistfully. “She deserves a new start; maybe she’ll meet a man who really loves her the way he should.”

Adam and Joe came forward to pat their brother reassuringly on the shoulder. “I know all of this has been difficult for you,” Adam stated quietly.

“Guess I made it a might harder on all of us than it had to be,” Hoss admitted sheepishly. Turning to Joe, he added, “And I’m sorry I hit ya, little brother.”

“Forget it,” Joe smiled affectionately. “You were standing up for what you thought was right. You wouldn’t be the brother we know and love if you weren’t trying to make someone happy.”

“We certainly can’t fault you for that,” Adam agreed. “Maybe we could all take a lesson from you from time to time.”

Ben watched the exchange silently from the kitchen doorway, not wanting to intrude on the moment, but unable to turn away as he watched the young men he’d raised exemplify the strong family traits he’d tried so hard to reinforce throughout their lives. “Elizabeth, Inger, Marie,” he whispered with tears in his eyes. “Thank you.”

The End

Disclaimer: No husbands were actually killed during the writing of this story. Any resemblance to any whiskey-drinking, vat-swimming foxes, living or dead, is purely unintentional.