Summary: “Did Saunders shoot Little Joe, Ben?” The sheriff asked.  “No, Roy, I did,” Ben answered succinctly, watching his youngest son glaring over at him from across the room. Rating T, WC 31,541

Because You Loved Me

*** For all the times you stood by me, for all the truth that you made me see.  For all the joy you brought to my life, for all the wrong that you made right.  For every dream you made come true, for all the love I found in you.  I’ll be forever thankful.  You’re the one who held me up, never let me fall.  You’re the one who saw me through, through it all. — I’m everything I am, because you loved me. *** (excerpt from song, “Because You Loved Me” by Diane Warren).

Garrett Saunders was a drunk, a swindler and a thief.  And those were only a couple of his character flaws that had been mentioned that early autumn day in Virginia City. Now he stood inside the courthouse while his charges were read to him.  Amongst his other claims to infamy was that he had almost killed Hoss Cartwright two weeks earlier.  It was alleged that he had shot, beaten, and robbed the likeable young man and left him on the road a mile from the Ponderosa thinking that he was dead.  Fortunately, Hoss’ father and little brother just happened to hear the gunfire.  They had raced to the scene in their buckboard to see what had happened just in the nick of time to witness Hoss lying on the ground with a bullet hole in him.

Hoss sat behind the prosecution table, his left arm in a sling and numerous facial wounds still visible due to what the vile man had done to him. Next to him sat his father, Ben Cartwright, along with his older brother, Adam.  Only one family member was missing and that was Little Joe; and for a good reason.  The judge, the honorable George Wheeler, had forbidden the young man from being in Virginia City during the proceedings.

Ben thought back to all that had transpired during the rush to get Hoss home and doctored.  He had to fight with his youngest son to stay with the wagon and help him load Hoss inside to get him home.  Joseph wanted to mount his brother’s horse so he could go after the man who had almost ended Hoss’ life.  Ben had never remembered seeing his youngest son acting quite as irately as he had on that fateful day.  Though the boy was known to have a quick temper, it had been more than that. Pa had been forced to use a commanding voice raised to a shout just to get Joseph to climb inside the wagon next to Hoss.  He grabbed the reins and raced to get his middle boy back to the ranch house.  And that wasn’t half of the story.  Joseph never calmed down, not even when Doctor Paul Martin had informed them all that, though Hoss had almost died from blood loss, he would live and eventually recover from his wounds.  The more the boy thought about the fact that Hoss had not only been shot and robbed but also pistol whipped, the more his hatred and need for revenge increased.  No matter what his father said to him, Little Joe wasn’t about to listen.  Joseph wanted to go after Saunders and kill him and Ben knew it.  From the moment that he’d seen his son bending over Hoss, Joe’s anger and his thirst for blood grew more urgent as each day had passed.

Ben sighed as he cast a quick glance around the courtroom while the prosecutor began to list the charges and the prison sentence that might be awaiting the accused.  His thoughts went back to his youngest boy.  Joseph was at the ranch house now and had been forced by a court order to stay put in the confines of the Cartwright front yard and personal quarters to avoid any incident from happening which might disrupt the trial.  *** Oh, Joseph! *** Ben thought to himself as the memories of the past two weeks played out in his mind.

**************

Adam threw his hat on top of the credenza as he hurried inside the ranch house.  He spotted his youngest brother impatiently pacing back and forth in front of the huge fireplace.  Spotting Little Joe’s clenched fists Adam knew that the boy was filled with both worry and rage.

“I got word that Hoss has been shot – how is he?” Adam asked out of breath as he drew closer to his brother.

Little Joe turned around and his face was beet-red.  “Doc’s trying to dig a bullet out of him – that’s how he is!” Joe’s voice showed both worry and anger in its tone.

Placing a hand onto his brother’s shoulder attempting to diffuse him, Adam returned, “Where did it take him, Little Joe?”

Pointing just above his heart Joe fumed, “It almost killed him on the spot, Adam.”

“How long has Doc been up there?”

Joe cast a wary glance at the grandfather clock and turned his gaze back on his brother.  “It’s been over an hour now.  Pa’s up there – but he told me I had to wait down here.  I don’t know why he made me leave.”

“Now, Joe – Doc doesn’t like an audience and you of all people should know it.  Just settle down – I’m sure Pa will tell us how Hoss is doing soon.  Hey – I know Hop Sing won’t be back for another week or so but how about I make us some coffee?  Mine’s not half bad,” Adam offered because he wanted to do what he could to try and instill some form of calm before their father came down the stairs.

“Don’t want any,” Joe answered and then turned when he heard a door closing. He hurried back to the bottom of the staircase.  It wasn’t long before he saw Pa heading down towards them.

Ben was glad to see that Adam had returned from the timber crew because he needed help with both Hoss and Joe.  He made his way to the first landing where he was met by both sons.

“Doc says your brother is going to make it,” Ben nodded over at both Adam and Little Joe.  “He’s had a rough go of it – that bullet was in a good ways but, with some rest, Paul said he should recover.”

“Thank God,” Adam sighed very relieved by his father’s report.  He reached up and patted his father’s arm.

Joe didn’t receive the news in quite the same fashion, though he was thankful that his brother was going to pull through.  His thoughts immediately turned to his desire for revenge on whoever had dared to hurt Hoss.

“Did Hoss come around?  Did he say who did it?” Little Joe’s questions shot out like rapid fire.

“Joseph,” Ben paused and sent the boy over a warning look.  “This isn’t the time for that.  I think right now you should be thanking God that we still have Hoss with us.”

“Okay I thanked God – but I did it in my head, Pa.  I want the man who did this now!” Joe insisted loudly.

Ben placed a calloused hand down onto his youngest son’s arm and forced his attention.  “Joseph— I want you to simmer down.  We will address finding whoever shot your brother once the sheriff gets here.  Right now, your brother needs looking after and I don’t need to worry about you going off half-cocked in some act of revenge.  Do you understand me, Boy?”

Little Joe angrily broke away from his father’s hold and headed up the stairs.  “I’m going to see my brother!”

Ben had to hurry up the stairs to stop his youngest.  Taking a hold of the boy’s elbow he ordered, “Joseph, go back down to the living room this instant!  Doc is with Hoss and he needs peace and quiet.  When the time is right, I’ll let you see him but not now.”

“What’s it gonna hurt for me to wait outside of his bedroom?” Joe continued to argue.

“Joseph,” Ben sighed and fought to find the right words to ease the boy’s mind.  “It’s not going to help anything by sitting outside of your brother’s bedroom.  You’ll only get that much more worked up.  Doc says most likely it won’t be until tomorrow that Hoss will even begin to come around.  He’s given him some strong pain killer.  Now – come on, Son, let’s go on down and get Doc Martin some coffee.  He’s put in a very long evening.  Pa placed his arm around Joe’s shoulder and offered a slight smile hoping to placate him.

“I just wanted to be close, Pa – in case he wakes up,” Joe whispered, dropping his head down.

“Not right now, Son.  I’ll tell you what — you can peek in on him for just a minute before you go to bed.   Doc doesn’t want Hoss disturbed – he needs his rest right now in order to heal.”

“But – what they did to him –,” Joe trailed off thinking about the sight of Hoss’ face and the way he had been needlessly pistol whipped on top of being shot.  It was eating him up on the inside and Little Joe couldn’t let go of it.

Pa was keenly aware of how his youngest felt because the sight had angered him equally or more so.   He needed to keep a tight rein on the seventeen-year-old for fear that he’d head off in a blind rage and hurt someone who might be innocent or get himself shot.  “Joseph – come on – let’s go to the kitchen.”

Adam witnessed the look on both his father and brother’s faces and just shook his head as he prepared to join them in the kitchen.  He had heard all that Pa had said and knew that he was trying to prevent the quick-tempered youngest from doing something he would later regret.  Adam nodded to Pa and shot him a look which let him know that he would speak to him privately when his little brother wasn’t around.

Casting one final glance up towards Hoss’ bedroom, Little Joe reluctantly walked down the stairs alongside his father.  It had taken all the willpower that existed in him to abide by Pa’s wishes.  All he wanted to do was go and find whoever had hurt his brother and shoot them down like they had Hoss.

************

Sheriff Roy Coffee appeared at the Ponderosa ranch house just in time to see Doc Martin’s carriage leaving.  He waved to the man and then knocked on the door.

“Hi, Roy – come on in,” Ben cast a tired smile to his friend and motioned him over to the settee.

“I seen Doc leaving – how’s Hoss, Ben?”

Sighing as he took a seat opposite the other man Ben replied, “He’s had a pretty rough go of it, Roy – but Paul said he should be okay in a couple of weeks.”

“I heard from Fletcher that when you got the boy home, he was in bad shape.  He said something about a gunshot, and that he’d been pretty badly beaten?”

Ben reached for the coffeepot on the table in front of him and poured some for his friend.  Passing the cup over to Roy Ben chose his words carefully when he spotted Little Joe coming down the stairs.

Clearing his throat and shooting Roy a quick warning glance, Ben responded.  “Yes – whoever did this shot and beat Hoss – and stole the money that he’d just gotten from the bank this afternoon.”

“Why don’t you tell it like it really is, Pa?” Joe complained, his voice raised as he moved over to the living room.  “He was pistol whipped, Roy!  Someone shot my brother down – and they thought that they had killed him. Then, though there wasn’t any reason for it, they beat his face until it was hardly recognizable!”

“Joseph – hold your voice down,” Ben warned with both his tone of voice and in his stern gaze.

Roy frowned and shook his head.  He expected there to be anger over what had happened to Hoss Cartwright, especially with his father and brothers.   But he knew the seventeen-year-old and his infamous temper.

“Now just simmer down, Little Joe.  We’ll catch whoever did this to Hoss,” The sheriff assured the boy.

“What’s been done already?  Has anyone found out who ambushed my brother or are you and everyone else just sitting around drinking coffee?”

“That’s enough, Joseph.  Go on up and sit with Hoss and send Adam down here,” Ben ordered standing from his chair.

“You got a posse yet?” Joe continued, undaunted by his father’s tone of voice.

Roy stared at Ben.   He could tell that the man was quite spent from all that had gone on that day along with trying his best to control his youngest.

“I’m investigating it, Little Joe.  Soon as your brother wakes up maybe he’ll have a name for me.  Once we know who’s involved then I’ll get me up a posse, if need be,” Roy explained.

“Not good enough!” Joe shouted indignantly.

Ben reached for his son’s arm and clamped his right hand down onto it roughly.  “Young Man, you go and do what I’ve just told you to do.  Now go!”

Seething inwardly, Little Joe broke from his father’s tight hold and turned for the stairs.  He was already beginning to formulate his own plan as to how to deal with the man who had hurt Hoss.

A few minutes later, Adam walked down the staircase and approached the two men sitting there in the living room.

“How’s your brother?” Ben questioned as he poured his son some coffee.  By the look on his face, he needed some.

“Thanks, Pa,” Adam nodded and sat down in the blue winged-back chair with his coffee cup.  “Hoss is sound asleep – hasn’t moved a muscle.”

“Doc said he’ll probably be out of it until tomorrow, Roy,” Ben interjected.

“What did they get off of him, Ben? How much money?”

“The payroll – and it was a hefty one, two thousand dollars.  It wasn’t just monthly wages it was also for the men who are going to help with the upcoming cattle drive,” Ben answered, his frustration mounting.

Roy thought on the situation and said, “I’ll check with Fred Andrews at the bank to see if anyone was lurking around there this afternoon.  Maybe that’ll help us figure out who followed Hoss?”

Ben shrugged his shoulders.  Any worry over the payroll money had vanished due to his concern for his son’s health.  “Hopefully Hoss will give us a name.  I’ll send Adam into town tomorrow once he comes around, Roy.  Guess we’ll all take it from there.”

“Good enough, Ben,” Roy nodded as he placed his cup back on top of the coffee table.  “I’d best be heading back to town,” He paused as his gaze tracked up the stairs.  “Now about Little Joe —

“I know, Roy,” Ben cut the sheriff off.  “I’ll keep an eye on the boy.”

“Don’t want him to go off in some kind of a blind frenzy and shoot someone who might be innocent, Ben,” Roy continued.

Ben stood to walk Roy to the door.  “He won’t – I’ll see to it.”

“Talk to you tomorrow – good night.”

“Thanks, Roy,” Ben patted the lawman’s shoulder as he walked out onto the porch.

************

Ben stared over at his eldest and called, “I threw a little something together for supper.  It’s on the stove.  Can I get you some, Adam?”

“You’ve done enough today, Pa – I’ll get it myself,” He returned and joined his father over by the credenza.  He followed Pa’s gaze as it shot back towards the staircase.  “I know – you’re worried about the kid, right?”

Frowning, Ben dropped his head a bit and thought about what his youngest might do if he wasn’t watched closely.  “You know how worked up your little brother is right now.  And you also know about what can happen due to that temper of his if he doesn’t keep it in check.”

Adam draped an arm over his father’s shoulder and answered, “Pa, I’ll watch after him – I know how he gets.  Maybe once Hoss comes around it’ll put him more at ease?”

“I’ve never seen that boy as angry as he was when we found Hoss, Adam.  We’d both better keep an eye on him in case we need to rein him in!  I’ll speak with him again about taking the law into his own hands.”

“Come on, Pa – how about we go and get something to eat, it’ll be okay,” Adam cajoled his father into going into the kitchen for some supper knowing that Pa hadn’t eaten a thing since he had brought Hoss home.

************

Ben tenderly washed his middle boy’s face attempting to soothe his numerous wounds which had been caused by the assailant’s gun.  After performing the same comforting motions several times, he set the cloth back inside the water basin.  Hearing the light tapping on the door, Ben turned in time to see Little Joe walking inside the bedroom.

“You told me I could see him again – after I ate.  I did that – now can I sit with Hoss?” Joe questioned, drawing near the bed.

“I don’t want you trying to wake him, Joseph.  And I don’t want you to try to ask him any questions if he does come around.  Do you understand?”

Joe simply nodded as Pa stood from the chair and placed a hand onto his shoulder.  He took the seat that his father had vacated and leaned forward wrapping his fingers around Hoss’ massive right hand.

“I’ll be back in a few minutes, Joseph,” Ben whispered and turned out of the room closing the door quietly.

Little Joe waited to hear the retreating bootsteps and then leaned in on the mattress.  “Hoss?  Hoss can you hear me?” He called softly but with an urgency in his words.  Joe knew that it was his only chance to try and talk to his brother alone.  Every other time that night, other than when his father and brother had been downstairs eating, he had been flanked by either Pa or Adam.

Watching as his brother slowly rolled his head on the pillow, Little Joe grew hopeful that Hoss was coming back around.

“Hoss?  Who did this to you?”

Hoss muttered a few unintelligible words and then his eyelids began to flutter a few times.

“Hoss?” Joe continued, gently rubbing his brother’s arm.  “Hoss – just tell me who shot you.”

Coughing a few times, Hoss choked out two words, “Garrett Saunders”.  He then went back underneath the comfortable blanket of sleep.

“I’ll get him,” Joe vowed and turned when the bedroom door opened.  He stood and faced his father.  “I guess I’ll go on to sleep now, Pa.”

“Did your brother come around at all?” Ben asked, moving closer to the bed.

“No, Sir,” Joe answered, never looking into his father’s eyes.  “See you in the morning,” he muttered and turned out of the room.

************

In the wee hours of the morning, Ben gave in to his body’s needs and had fallen to sleep in the chair next to his son’s bed.  Hoss hadn’t made a sound nor moved an inch all night.  Unbeknownst to his father, he had uttered those few fleeting words naming his assailant when he had answered Little Joe’s question.  Ben had made his son as comfortable as he could and after fussing over him, he finally succumbed to exhaustion a little past three o’clock.

“Pa?” The voice called from the bed, and it sounded much too soft to be from Hoss, but it had been.  The big man scrunched up his face fighting the pain from his shoulder wound as he stared over at the white-haired man in the chair there next to him.

Instantly waking up, Ben leaned forward and smiled.  “Hoss?  You back with me, Boy?”

“Yeah—yeah, Pa.  Kind of woozy though.”

“Here,” Ben stood and poured his son some water and held the glass to his lips.  “Take this slowly, Son.  You’ve been out a long while.”

Hoss drank a few long sips and then nodded that he had enough.  Ben set the glass back onto the nightstand and stared down at his son again.

“You’ve had all of us worried, Hoss.  How do you feel – or is it too soon to ask you?”

“Shoulder smarts, Pa – but I’m okay,” Hoss answered, still trying to get his bearings.

“Doc left you some pain medicine, but I’d hoped I could get some food into you first.  What do you think?”

“Wish I could say I’m hungry – but I’m not feeling too perky just yet, Pa,” Hoss tried his best to alleviate his father’s concern.  He could tell that the man was exhausted just by looking at him.  A note of confusion controlled his face as the foggy memory from earlier made him glance around expecting to see his little brother.  “Where’s Little Joe?”

“The boy was in here last night – but I sent him to bed.  Well, you know how much he worries,” Ben attempted to downplay the anger his youngest had displayed all the previous day.

“But – I talked with him – I don’t think it was a dream,” Hoss stated, confusion still filling his eyes.

Ben was starting to think that his middle boy had been dreaming about speaking to Little Joe due to all the medicine that Doc Martin had dosed him with.  “Now just relax, Boy, everything is fine.  But you need your rest, Young Man, you’ve had a time of it what with Doc digging for that bullet yesterday.”

“I know I talked to Little Joe, Pa – he asked me who shot me,” Hoss insisted.

“Who shot you, Hoss?”

“Garrett – Garrett Saunders, Pa – robbed me – shot me.  I had just about passed out after he shot me.  I fell off Chub and then I saw him bending over me.  He took off my money belt.  I guess I should’ve done a better job playing possum because when he saw that I wasn’t dead he began hitting me with the butt of his gun.  That’s all I can remember.”

Ben patted Hoss’ arm, attempting to calm him.  “It’s okay, Son.  We’ll get him.  All that matters right now is that you’re going to be alright – that is if you’ll rest and take care of yourself,” He spoke soothingly to Hoss, still trying to get him to settle back.

“But – Little Joe — I know I told him, Pa.  I told him who done this to me,” He protested and then closed his eyes again.  Hoss had grown weak from talking about the events from the previous day.

“Everything is going to be fine, Boy—just fine.  You rest up awhile,” Ben coaxed and noticed that his son had fallen right back under.  He pulled the covers underneath Hoss’ chin and swept a hand across his brow.  It was then that he thought about all that his son had just conveyed.  ***If you told Joe the name of the man who shot you – then why didn’t the boy say anything to me about it? *** Ben wondered and then a feeling of dread overcame him.  ***I’d better go and make sure – I hope I’m wrong! *** He turned out of the bedroom and headed down the hall to make sure that Little Joe was in his bed and not out somewhere seeking revenge.

Ben eased the door to Little Joe’s room open and walked over to the bed.  The covers hadn’t been turned down, and it was very apparent that his son hadn’t even attempted to go to sleep that night.  Joe was nowhere to be seen.  ***That darn kid!  I should’ve locked him inside his room last night. *** Ben fumed as he turned out of the bedroom and hurriedly made his way across the hall to Adam’s room.  He knocked on the door and just a minute later his son peered out.

“Pa?  Pa, what’s wrong?  Is it Hoss?” Adam asked, rubbing his eyes trying to clear his vision after a night of tossing and turning in his sleep.

“It’s Little Joe – Hoss told the boy who shot him last night when Joe was watching him.  I’m heading out to the bunkhouse in a minute to rouse Fletcher, so he’ll come in and help you take care of Hoss while I’m out trying to find that hardheaded kid!”

Adam shook his head bewildered by the fact that Joe had learned the identity of the shooter but had hidden it from the rest of them.  “Who was it that shot Hoss?”

“Garrett Saunders.  I’ve got to get a bedroll packed just in case I don’t find him right away.  I’ll send one of the other hands into town to let Roy know what’s gone on.  You just keep an eye on Hoss – tend to his needs and make sure he eats.  Doc will be here this afternoon to see about that wound.  I’d best get moving – it’s going to be light soon.  I hope I can find that boy before he kills Saunders – or gets himself shot!” Ben fussed, trying to keep his voice down so it didn’t awaken Hoss.

“Pa – maybe I should go after Joe, and you stay here?”

Ben shook his head angrily.  “No, Son, it’s best that I handle your brother.  And Joseph is going to have to deal with me for lying about all this too!”

“Good luck – and don’t worry – I’ll take good care of Hoss,” he reassured his father and watched as he hurried down the hall heading for his room.

***********

Little Joe Cartwright had only been alive for seventeen years, but he had learned a lot in that amount of time when it came to tracking someone.  His brother Hoss had taught him well.  He rode to the exact spot where Hoss had been shot and studied the cold damp ground.  Joe knew Chub’s hoofprints and examined the tracks right next to those left by his brother’s horse.  He stood and surveyed the distance planning on how he would find Garrett Saunders.  Joe remembered the man, who was in his late forties and was well known in Virginia City as a ne’er-do-well.  His father had exchanged heated words with Saunders several times about him poaching cattle on the Ponderosa.  Joe remembered that there was an old cabin just outside the northeastern border of the ranch and he’d seen Saunders up there a time or two when he had ridden fence with Hoss the previous summer.  Joe threw himself up onto Cochise’s back after studying the tracks thoroughly.  He kicked at his horses’ sides and headed for the cabin close to Wolf Creek and the high woods.

Ben wasn’t too far behind his youngest son that day and had done some tracking himself.  It was easy to spot the tracks left by his son’s horse, Cochise, as Joseph hadn’t done the best job of shoeing the animal earlier that month.  There was one break in her back left shoe, and it helped the worried father spot the direction in which his son was now heading in his search for the gunman who had shot Hoss.  Ben prayed every mile of his search that he would come upon the boy before it was too late and he either killed Saunders or got himself shot by the vile man.

************

Wolf Creek had suffered from the recent dry spell and there wasn’t much water in it as Little Joe dismounted and bent down to study the tracks which had been left by Saunders’ horse.  He took the opportunity to water Cochise and get a few hands full himself before continuing in his search.  Wondering if Hoss had come back around and had told his father the identity of his assailant, Joe couldn’t help worrying that there might be a posse heading in his direction soon.  He didn’t want that to happen as he needed to kill Garrett himself.  He had vowed that he would make the man pay for having hurt his brother so badly.  Joe could taste his increased thirst for the man’s blood.  He’d make him pay for every single cut and bruise on Hoss’ face before killing him.

“Come on, Cooch,” Joe said and vaulted back up into his saddle to follow the tracks along the creek-bed which were easy to read heading towards the cabin.

************

Ben bent down and examined the hoof prints next to the water’s edge.  They were Cochise’s and he knew that the kid couldn’t be too far ahead of him now.  He let Buck lap from the water before getting back into his saddle and heading in the direction that his son was now going.  Ben shook his head and wondered why he couldn’t ever get through to his youngest boy.  The kid had been a challenge his whole life and he never did things the easy way; not ever!  He hoped that the boy, if he did come upon Saunders, would have the good sense to watch himself and not get hurt.  Ben also feared Joseph’s terrible temper and what he might do if he caught up with the other man.  He prayed that Joe wouldn’t take the law into his own hands, but he wasn’t at all sure about that.  *** How many times have I tried to get it into your head that you are not the law?  How many times have you ridden off in a blind rage only to learn later that it’s wiser to maintain some control, or you’ll get yourself into trouble, Joseph? *** Ben thought as he lightly kicked at his horse’s sides to pick up the pace.

************

Dusk had fallen by the time Little Joe had come to the end of the trail as far as Saunders tracks were concerned.  He had gone by the cabin some three miles behind him now, but it had proven to be a dead end.   Joe had gone inside and checked the pot-bellied stove and determined that it hadn’t been used in quite a while.  He decided that Saunders must have avoided hiding out there because others, like Joe had, would think of it as his most likely destination.  But he knew that the man had headed in that direction and now, studying the hoof prints, he presumed that Saunders was hiding down by the dry creek bed. He knew that there was a large outcropping of boulders which would be a perfect place to hide from anyone on horseback.  Leaving Cochise tied up to a chokecherry bush on top of the rocky incline, Joe climbed down to the creek bed, his gun held securely in his left hand.  There were only a few rays of the retreating sunset to see by, so he took his time as he moved closer to the rocks and listened.  Just a few minutes later he heard the snapping of a twig and turned in the direction and waited.  Little Joe hadn’t heard another sound for several more minutes.  He hugged his body closer to the face of one of the large boulders to avoid detection.  Waiting breathlessly, he heard what sounded like cautious bootsteps coming towards him.  Joe drew in a deep breath and readied his gun in anticipation.

“Drop it, Saunders!” Joe shouted and watched as the man who had been caught by surprise had reached for his gun.  “I said drop it!” Joe shouted once more.  “Throw it over there!” Joe pointed to his left and waited.

“You ain’t got no reason to point that gun at me,” Saunders called over to the boy.  “I ain’t done nothing!”

“Toss it or I shoot you down right now!”

Saunders tossed his gun where Joe had instructed and then faced the brother of his victim.

“Now – where’s your gear?” Joe asked as he kicked the man’s gun out of the way and far from Saunders’ reach.

“Back over there,” He frowned and pointed to the steep embankment just below where Cochise had been tied.

“Move over to it – and we’ll just see what you’ve been up to,” Little Joe returned, his eyes reflecting the last of the sun’s rays as he pointed with his gun.

Garrett Saunders walked in front of his captor until he came to a halt in front of where he had stashed his bedroll and the rest of his possessions.

Little Joe bent down and shook out the blanket and watched as Hoss’ money belt fell down on the ground.  He reached inside with his right hand; his Colt still held firmly in his left.  The two thousand dollars was still inside where his brother had placed it the day before.  “Funny, my brother Hoss has one just like this. And strangely enough yours has the exact same amount of money that he’d gotten from the bank yesterday,” Joe announced with venom in his tone of voice.

“I – I didn’t mean to hurt him,” Saunders tried to lie his way out of being shot by the angered brother of his victim.

Joe stood and roughly shoved the man backwards.  “Yeah – you didn’t mean to hurt my brother!  That’s why you beat him half dead with the butt of your gun!” Joe screamed at the man.

“You – you gotta take me to the sheriff – you can’t just shoot me down I’m unarmed!”

Little Joe sneered at the man and replied, “Yes, I can – and I’m gonna do it right now.  You tried to kill my brother.  You shot and beat him so now I’m going to kill you for doing that!”  Joe cocked his Colt revolver and pointed it at the man’s head.

*************

Following his son’s tracks, Ben rode to the top of the incline where they had ended.  His mouth fell open the instant he spotted Cochise and then noticed his son standing down below readying to shoot Garrett Saunders.  He didn’t have time to talk the boy out of killing the man after witnessing Joe cocking back the hammer of his gun.  With a lightning-quick draw of his Colt, Ben fired in his son’s direction.  The bullet hit its intended target.  He watched Little Joe automatically drop his gun and then fall to his knees. Ben launched himself off Buck and hurried down the slope, with his heart beating hard over what he had just done.  He kept his gun trained on Saunders as he moved over to him.

“If you even move an inch, Saunders, I’ll shoot you down,” Ben warned and helped pull his son to his feet.  He briefly inspected the wound on the boy’s left arm and wrapped his neckerchief around it.

Little Joe stood there both stunned and speechless as his father tied the cloth around his left arm.  He couldn’t believe that Pa had shot him.  It seemed like some kind of a bizarre nightmare as it was a scenario which would never really happen; not in a million years.  All Joe could surmise was that Pa had accidentally missed and his bullet had struck him and not Saunders, the intended target.

Ben retrieved his son’s gun and placed it inside his coat.  He next removed the rawhide strings from his holster and approached Saunders.

“Put those wrists out in front of you,” Ben ordered, his gun still pointed at the evil man.

Garrett did as he had been instructed not wanting to chance Ben Cartwright killing him like his boy had attempted to do.  Ben was able to tie Saunders wrists together using only one hand, not willing to take his gun off the man.  He tested the rawhide to make sure that both wrists were securely bound together and then cast a quick glance over to his son.  He noticed Hoss’ money belt lying on the ground not far from where Joe still stood in silence.  Ben walked over and picked it up, tossing it over his shoulder.

“Let’s get the horses, Joseph,” he called to the boy.

“You shot me,” Joe stated bluntly, with disbelief all over his face.

“I’m quite aware of that fact.  Now let’s go,” Ben insisted gruffly, not wanting to get into his reasoning for having done what Joe had forced him to do.

Ben and Joe retrieved their mounts and led them down the slope with Garrett Saunders walking in front of them the whole time.  They pushed him back down the incline and into the rocks where his horse had earlier been concealed.  Shoving the man up into his saddle, Ben motioned for his son to follow suit.  Little Joe hesitated as he stared at his father once more.

“Give me my gun back,” Joe insisted sharply, finally realizing that Pa’s aim hadn’t been off and that he had indeed shot him on purpose.  He still couldn’t fathom the idea that his father would have done that.

“No,” Ben stated firmly and placed his son’s weapon inside his saddlebags along with Hoss’ money belt.  “Now mount up, Joseph,” He commanded staring over at the boy.

For about thirty seconds Joe thought about jumping into his saddle and racing away but after taking a good long look at the expression his father was now wearing, he decided that it wouldn’t be a wise thing to do.  Pa looked very angry and, after all, he had already shot him once.  Little Joe had learned his lesson the hard way, he could no longer second guess what his father was capable of doing.  Begrudgingly he slowly climbed onto his saddle, using only his right hand to pull himself up due to his injury.   He followed Ben and Saunders’ horses as they made their way towards Virginia City.

************

Just before nine o’clock that night the three horses rode up to the hitching post outside of the Virginia City Sheriff’s Office.  Ben dismounted and eyed the situation.  There was no way that he was going to drag Garrett Saunders inside the jailhouse and leave Little Joe outside alone.  He could no longer trust the boy to make the right decisions.  Ben thought that his son might just ride off the minute that his back was turned and he wasn’t about to go back out and chase the kid down again.

“Roy!” Ben shouted and waited for the lawman to appear.

The sheriff had heard the loud call and knew that it had been Ben Cartwright’s voice.  He walked outside and then hurried down the steps.

“Ben?  Ben, I was just getting myself ready to come out to the Ponderosa – but I see you found Saunders already,” Roy explained and approached the three horses.

“Roy – go ahead and take this skunk in and lock him up,” Ben pointed his gun towards his prisoner.  “Get down from that saddle, Saunders!”

“I was out at your place earlier and Adam told me you’d gone looking for Little Joe.  I guess I need to tell Clem to call off the posse that I just got up a little while ago,” Roy explained as he took Saunders into custody.  He pointed his gun at the man and readied to get him inside.

“I’ll be right behind you, Roy,” Ben nodded to the man as he approached his son.  “Get on down from there, Joseph.”

“Why?  I’m not going inside the jail,” Joe insisted hotly.

“I said get down from there, Joseph,” Ben reiterated and shot his son a stern warning look.

“What for?” Joe stubbornly continued to refuse his father’s orders.  He was upset and the whole way into town he had dwelled on the fact that Pa had purposely shot him and not Garrett Saunders.

Ben drew closer to his son’s horse and placed a firm hand onto the boy’s left kneecap.  “Do you want me to yank you down off your horse?  I’m warning you that I’m going to do just that in about three seconds if you don’t get moving!”

Little Joe dismounted without another word.  He didn’t have one shred of doubt that Pa would’ve done exactly what he had threatened to do if he had lingered there on top of his horse another few seconds.

“Inside now, Joseph,” Ben ordered and grabbed the boy by his right arm and led him up the stairs.

Roy walked out from the back jailcells and locked the door which separated the office and them.  He turned the key in the lock and stared over at both Cartwrights.

“Sit down over there, Young Man,” Ben commanded and pointed over to the bench across the room before turning back to face the sheriff.  He watched as this time, unlike outside, the boy had done exactly what he had been told to do.

“Did Saunders shoot Little Joe, Ben?” The sheriff asked, noticing the neckerchief that was tied around the boy’s left arm.

“No, Roy, I did,” Ben answered succinctly, watching his youngest son glaring over at him from across the room.

Roy Coffee looked at his old friend like he had two heads.  “What do you mean you did?”

Ben shot another quick glance over at his son and then motioned Roy towards the door.  “Let’s talk outside.  Joseph, you stay put right there!”

Roy shrugged his shoulders at a total loss over what his friend had said and the way the man seemed to be very upset with the boy he most often doted on.  He turned and followed Ben outside.

“It’s okay, Roy,” Ben paused as the two of them made it out to the porch.  “I’ve got Joe’s gun inside my saddlebags, and you’ve got Saunders locked inside the back jailcell.”

Roy reached for his friend’s arm forcing his gaze.  “Now, Ben, what in tarnation is going on?  Did you really shoot Little Joe?”

Ben nodded and sighed wearily, “Yes, I did.”

“What happened – did you miss Saunders and accidentally hit your boy?” Roy continued, figuring that it had to be the only scenario that made sense.

“No, I shot my son on purpose.  If you’ve been to the ranch, then you know that Joseph went off gunning for Saunders.”

“Yeah, Adam told me as much.  But what happened?”

“I came upon the boy just when he was getting ready to shoot Saunders down in cold blood, Roy.  He had already taken Saunders’ gun – so Joe would’ve killed an unarmed man.”

Roy finally understood now why his friend had done what he had.  He nodded and waited for Ben to finish.

“Joseph had the hammer cocked back already when I got there.  I was up on an embankment and there wasn’t any time to try and talk him out of what he was getting ready to do.  I came up on Joe’s left side – and due to the angle and the lighting – well – there wasn’t the slightest chance that I could safely shoot that pistol out of his hand.  So, I clipped his upper arm, so he’d drop his gun.”

It was very apparent to Roy that Ben’s decision to shoot his son had hurt him deeply and he felt so awful for what the man had been forced to do.  He reached for Ben’s arm and placed a sympathetic hand down onto it.  “I’m plum sorry that the kid forced you into making that kind of decision, Ben.  I know it had to have killed you inside.  But – you did the only thing that you could’ve done.  You know that if Little Joe had killed Saunders in cold blood the boy would’ve faced the rope!”

Ben dropped his head down a bit, still fighting with himself over what he had done.  “It was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do in my whole life, Roy,” He sighed deeply filled with regret and a big dose of fatherly guilt.

“Like as not Little Joe will heal up just fine, Ben.  If you just clipped him – well it sure is a whole lot better than to lose him to the hangman’s noose!”

“Yes – I know.  Still – Joseph is infuriated with me right about now.  And I’m going to need you to lock him up.”

“Lock him up?” Roy asked, now wondering if the whole wide world had gone crazy.  Ben Cartwright had shot his youngest son and now he was trying to jail the boy.  “Why?  He hasn’t really committed a crime – you prevented all of that!”

“You know that – -and I know that – but Joseph can’t get it through his head that he shouldn’t have taken the law into his own hands.  I thought about all of this on the way here.  I figured that I’d go see Judge Wheeler and see if we can get some kind of a hearing tomorrow.  You know – put the fear of God into the boy?  I’m pretty sure that the judge will go along with it so Joseph will hear from someone other than his father – that he would’ve been hung if he had shot Saunders,” Ben explained.

“Good idea, Ben – but what am I supposed to tell Little Joe about my jailing him tonight?”

“Well – how about you tell the boy that he’s got to stay until there’s a hearing to see if there’ll be any charges against him for what he was about to do?”

Roy smiled and patted his friend’s arm.  “Yep – that’ll do.”

“Oh, we found Hoss’ money belt – guess Saunders didn’t have the chance to spend any of it.  The whole two thousand dollars is in my saddlebags,” Ben explained.  “He was hiding up by Wolf Creek not far from that cabin he was known to hang out a few years back.”

“Yep, that’s where I was sending the posse right before you got here,” Roy nodded.

“Okay – now that I’ve told you what you need to know as sheriff, I’m going to go and see if I can speak to Judge Wheeler and then have Doc take a look at the boy’s arm.  Afterwards I’m going back to the ranch to check on Hoss.”

“Don’t you worry none about Little Joe I’ll get Clem to spell me tonight to make sure there isn’t a problem.  I’ll also put the boy in a cell that isn’t too close to Saunders.”

“Thanks, Roy, I appreciate your help.  Well, I guess we’d better get back inside so you can lock up my son.  I know that Joseph isn’t going to be happy about it.”

Roy stared into his friend’s eyes and returned, “Ben, now you done the only thing that you could’ve done.  I don’t want you to be up all night worrying about it either.  If Little Joe was my boy, I’d have done the same – as would any other father who loves his son.”

Ben simply nodded his appreciation and the two men walked back inside the jailhouse.

*************

Little Joe had paced the floor of the jail the whole time that both his father and the sheriff were gone.  He couldn’t figure out what was going on outside and what the whole need for secrecy was all about.  Though he’d already presumed that Pa was giving Roy all the information about where they had found Saunders it just didn’t make any sense that he wouldn’t have stayed inside to do it.   Little Joe looked across the room as both Roy and his father walked back inside.

Roy grabbed the keys to the back jailcells and approached Little Joe.  “Come on back here with me, Boy,” He directed his new prisoner.

“What?  Why?” Joe stammered and shot a glance over at his father who in turn simply dropped his head down a bit to avoid the boy’s eyes.

“Gotta hold you over until Judge Wheeler can convene his court and decide if I can let you go.”

Joe sent his father over a hateful glare.  “Thanks, Pa!  First, you shoot me and now you get me locked up in a jailcell!”

Roy grabbed the boy’s right arm to lead him into the next room.  “Now, Joe I’ll not stand for you yelling at your pa!  I’m the sheriff and I don’t need anyone to tell me how to do my job.  It’s only a formality anyway – like as not you’ll get off with a warning.  Now get on in there,” the sheriff insisted as he opened the door and pulled the boy inside.

“Thanks, again, Pa!  Now I get locked up and I’ll have to look at the bastard who shot my brother!” Joe fumed as Roy herded him to the cell.

Ben moved to the back room and watched as the sheriff pushed his son into a cell and locked the door.   “I’ll be back with Doc in a little while, Joseph,” he returned, trying to excuse away the reason for the boy’s outburst.  Ben knew that his son was furious with him.

“Don’t even bother!” Joe shouted as he angrily sat down on the cot.

“Not one word either of you!” Roy pointed at both Little Joe and Saunders.  He closed the door and stepped back into the front room.  It was then that he witnessed the sorrowful expression that the very upset father was now wearing.  “Ben, the boy will be fine.  Clem and I will look after him tonight.”

“I know, Roy.  I just hate what I had to do.  First, I’m forced to shoot my son and now I’ve had him locked up.  I despise that man in there with Joseph and yet to the boy it looks as though I’ve been kind to Saunders and am purposely hurting my own son.”

“It’s all going to be okay, Ben.  And you did right by Joe.  The kid will understand once Judge Wheeler talks some sense into him.  You go and find Doc and I’ll see to it that Joe’s doing okay.”

“I’ll be back just as quick as I can.  I’ll try to get Doc over here to see to the boy while I’m speaking to Judge Wheeler,” Ben replied and hurried out of the jailhouse.

*************

Ben had spoken to the judge and was assured that the two of them were in total agreement about what should be done about Joe the following day.  Next, he headed over to the jail to inform the sheriff.  He noticed Doctor Martin out on the porch saying goodnight to Roy.  Ben quickly climbed the steps and hurried over to speak to both men.

“How is he, Paul?” Ben asked trying to catch his breath.

Doc reached over and patted the anxious father’s shoulder.  “Little Joe is going to be okay, Ben.  You just took off a little bit of his hide.  If he takes care of that wound, it ought to heal up nicely in a week or two,” He tried his best to put the man at ease.  Paul was aware of the stress that his old friend had been under, and he wasn’t about to make it any worse on him.

“Thank God,” Ben sighed.  “Now – how’s my other boy?  Is Hoss any better?”

“That middle boy of yours has the constitution of a bull moose, Ben.  He’ll need to stay in bed for the next week or so and after that we’ll put a sling on his left arm to help.  But Hoss will be okay.  I’m not concerned all that much with either of your boys—just their father!”

“Tell him to go home, will you, Doc?” Roy smiled over at the man.

“Go home,” Paul insisted.

“I think I’d better go and see Joseph before I leave.”

“No, I don’t think that’s a good idea, Ben,” Roy tried to warn the man.  “That stubborn little cuss is only going to try to rile you and then do his best to make you feel guilty.  He’s got his quills out tonight that’s for sure!  Just leave him be until morning.  Did you get the judge to go along with your idea?”

“Yes – he’s got a hearing scheduled for eleven tomorrow morning, Roy.  He agrees that Little Joe needs a severe warning from the court that taking the law into his own hands won’t be tolerated.”

“Good,” Roy nodded.  “Now, you get on back to your ranch so Doc can get back to his place, and I can go grab some shuteye too!”

Ben cast a worried gaze towards the jail which was very easily readable by his two friends.

“Little Joe will be fine, Ben,” Paul insisted.

“Okay – I want to go check on Hoss,” Ben agreed.  “I appreciate both of your help in dealing with that kid – and his worried father too!”

“Get some rest and I’ll see you around ten.  Best bring the boy a fresh shirt you know old Judge Wheeler and his rules about coming into his courtroom looking decent,” Roy smiled.

Ben nodded and shook the hands of his two old friends before walking down the porch steps.  He grabbed the reins of both Cochise and Buck and slowly mounted, pulling his son’s horse behind him.  Casting one last sorrowful glance towards the jail, Ben rode back to the Ponderosa.

*************

Little Joe hadn’t slept more than a couple of hours due to having Garrett Saunders looking over at him from across the room.  He had wanted to cuss at the man, but Joe knew that Roy wasn’t above grabbing him and soaping his mouth if he caught him doing it.  Joe’s stomach churned at the thought of having to go and face the judge that morning and when Roy walked into the jailhouse to give him a shirt, he had asked if he really had to face Judge Wheeler.  The sheriff had told him emphatically that there was no way he was getting out of going to court.  Roy had shoved the clean shirt through the jailcell bars and told him to get ready.  Little Joe’s anger hadn’t abated and if anything, it had merely simmered until turning into a full boil again.   There was a brief moment upon waking up that he had presumed he had dreamed the whole thing and that Pa hadn’t really shot him.  But after he had rubbed the sleep sand out of his eyes and noticed the steel bars which surrounded him, Joe knew that it hadn’t been a dream after all.

Pulling on the shirt and groaning a bit when the cotton material rubbed against the wound on his upper arm, Little Joe heard the deep baritone voice of his father coming from the next room.  He had figured that Pa would be going to court and Little Joe dreaded seeing him that morning.  His father was a stickler for following the law, unlike his youngest son.  Joe knew that he’d be hearing an earful from the judge and Pa and the thought of it made him feel sick to his stomach.

The door to the front room opened and the sheriff walked in with Ben Cartwright standing there next to him.  The two men made their way down to Little Joe’s jailcell and Roy unlocked the door.  Staring over at his father Joe swallowed hard not knowing what to say to the man.  He noticed that Pa was wearing his dark blue suit, white dress shirt and black string tie.  That was never a good sign.  Little Joe knew that his father only got dressed up like that for formal parties, weddings and funerals.  He knew that they weren’t going to any party or wedding and that just left a funeral which he presumed was his after both Judge Wheeler and Pa were done with him.  Joe dropped his gaze to the floor and waited.

“Joseph,” Ben merely said his son’s name and that was all and Joe didn’t respond in any way.

“Come on, Boy. It’s time we walked down to the courthouse,” Roy addressed his prisoner and reached for his right arm.

“I’m coming,” Joe muttered as he stepped out of the cell never looking over at his father.  He followed the sheriff into the next room.

“I gave your pa your holster already, Little Joe – but it’s going to be up to the judge if he’ll be giving it or your gun back to you.  Now let’s go,” Roy informed the boy and opened the door to the jailhouse.

Little Joe cast a quick glance over at his father and couldn’t help wondering why he had yet to say something to him.  He assumed that the man was probably waiting to see what Judge Wheeler was going to do with him first.  Little Joe figured that if he was going to be sent back to jail that his father would have lots to say then.

*************

The two-block walk had been a quiet one with neither Roy nor Ben speaking at all and Joe so filled with both anger and dread that he hadn’t noticed their silence.  The three of them filed inside the Virginia City Courthouse and took their seats in the front row.  Only a bailiff, the prosecutor and Sheriff Coffee were in attendance besides Little Joe and his father.  A few minutes after their arrival, the judge walked inside and everyone stood until the bailiff instructed them to take their seats.

Judge George Wheeler studied the notes in front of him before looking at Little Joe.  He cleared his throat and finally spoke up.

“Joseph Cartwright, please rise.”

Drawing in a deep breath and still trying to avoid his father’s eyes, Little Joe stood and faced the bench.

“Do you know why you’re here, Young Man?” The judge asked calmly.

“I think so, Your Honor,” Joe answered quietly.

“According to my notes your brother Hoss was shot, beaten and robbed two days ago.  Is that right?”

“Yes, Sir,” Joe nodded biting at his bottom lip in woeful anticipation of what the judge’s ruling might be.

“Sheriff Coffee – do you have a suspect?”

Roy stood and replied, “I have, Judge, Mister Garrett Saunders has been charged but hasn’t had his first hearing yet.”

The judge nodded and turned back to look at Joe.  “Joseph, you went after Mister Saunders, is that correct?”

“Yes, Sir, I did.”

“Were you planning on bringing him in for trial?”

Joe shrugged his shoulders and nervously looked down at the floor.

“Joseph, this is a court of law – and though I haven’t had you officially sworn in I do expect an honest answer from you.”

“I wasn’t planning on bringing him in, Your Honor,” Little Joe finally confessed.

“What exactly were you planning to do with Mister Saunders?”

“I – well – I’m not exactly sure.”

Judge Wheeler looked down at his notes again and turned his attention back to the boy in front of him.  “Were you planning on killing him?”

“I’m not sure.  When I found him – well — things went a lot faster than I thought that they would,” Joe attempted to sidestep his actions.

“I see,” The judge remarked, not believing a word that Joe had offered. He next focused his attention on the boy’s father.  “Ben Cartwright please stand.”

“Yes, Your Honor,” Ben responded and stood next to his son.

“You were with your son, is that right?”

Ben shot his son a very disappointed look and replied, “I had gone out to look for him, and I found him with Mister Saunders, Judge.”

“What was your son doing when you came upon him, Mister Cartwright?”

“It appeared to me that my son was getting ready to shoot Mister Saunders,” Ben answered.

“Do you think Joseph had the intention of killing him, Ben?”

“It appeared to me that he did – yes.”

“And what action did you take to prevent that from happening?”

“I – well – I was forced to shoot my son.  It looked to me as though my son might be getting ready to kill Garrett Saunders.”

“Was Mister Saunders armed at the time, Ben?”

“No, Your Honor, he was not.”

Little Joe bit at his bottom lip filled with both worry over the judge’s upcoming decision and anger at his father for having told the truth.

The judge stared over at Joe once more.  “Joseph, I’ll ask you again — were you planning on killing Mister Saunders?”

“I – I can’t say for sure,” Joe stuttered nervously hoping the judge couldn’t read his eyes at the time and see the dishonesty in them.

“Joseph, you do understand that Mister Saunders has yet to be convicted of any crime, don’t you?”

“Yes, — but my brother has identified him as being the man who shot and beat him, Your Honor,” Little Joe explained.  “I found my brother Hoss’ money belt on him, and it had the exact same amount of money inside that was in it before he robbed Hoss.”

“Young Man, regardless of those facts the accused is entitled to due process.  Mister Saunders, like all who are accused of a crime, has the right to a trial.  It wasn’t your place to appoint yourself judge, jury and executioner.”

“Yes, Sir,” Little Joe responded quietly.

“Your father did you a great favor, Joseph.  Because had you intentionally killed an unarmed man, regardless of whether he did or did not shoot your brother, you would have been tried in this court and found guilty of murder.  Do you know the penalty for first degree murder?”

Joe shrugged his shoulders and didn’t respond.  He knew what the penalty was but didn’t want to affirm that he knew it in court.

Judge Wheeler frowned and stared over at the boy’s father.  “Well, since you didn’t answer I will assume that either you don’t know what the penalty is for first degree murder or you just don’t want to admit it to me.  Joseph, had you shot an unarmed man down in cold blood then once you were found guilty of the crime it would have been my duty to sentence you to be hanged by the neck until dead.  Do you understand me?”

Little Joe looked directly at the judge and nodded.  “Yes, Your Honor.”

“You are a very fortunate young man, Joseph.  Your father saved you from a disastrous mistake on your part, one that would have cost you your life.  Now, I see from my notes that you haven’t been in any trouble recently and that you haven’t had any charges against you prior to this.  I will take that into consideration. It’s my sincere hope that you have learned from all this that you need to temper your emotions to prevent yourself from making further bad decisions.  I also understand that you were very upset about what had happened to your brother.  However, that wouldn’t have prevented me from sending you to the gallows had you gone ahead and killed that man.  I’m going to remand you into your father’s custody, but you are not to come into Virginia City until after the trial of Garrett Saunders, do you understand?”

“Yes, Your Honor,” Little Joe nodded once more.

“Furthermore, you are not to use any kind of firearm until given permission by this court, do you understand?”

“Yes, Your Honor.”

“Ben?  Are you going to be able to keep your son at your ranch to prevent any further problems until the trial for Mister Saunders concludes?”

Ben stared directly at his son and his face took on a very stern countenance.  “I can promise you that my son won’t go anywhere unchaperoned, Your Honor.  And I won’t allow him to go anywhere near Virginia City.”

“And as for firearms – will you be able to make sure that the boy won’t get his hands on any?”

“Yes, Judge, I assure you that Joseph won’t touch a handgun or a rifle until you say he’s no longer restricted from the use of them,” Ben stated emphatically.

“Very well, Ben,” Judge Wheeler nodded over to the man and then turned his attention back to Little Joe.  “Joseph, you do know that if you violate any of these rules that I’ll be sending you back to jail where you will stay until I determine that you understand what’s expected of you?”

“Yes, Sir,” Joe nodded.

“I won’t be offering you anymore leniency if I find that you’ve done anything like this in the future, Young Man,” He warned.

“Yes, Your Honor, I understand.”

The judge jotted down a few things on the paper in front of him and then called over to Roy Coffee.  “Sheriff, under the stipulations that I have ordered, you can release your prisoner into his father’s custody.  This hearing stands adjourned,” Judge Wheeler hit his gavel and stood.  He walked out of the courtroom, and Roy made his way over to both Ben and Joe.

“I hope you listened to what Judge Wheeler said, Little Joe.  He won’t be giving you a second chance, that’s for sure.  In fact, you’re lucky he didn’t make you go and sit out that trial over in my jail,” Roy warned the boy.

“I listened,” Joe mumbled not looking up at the sheriff.  He was still fuming inside over the whole ordeal.  As far as Little Joe was concerned, he had every right to kill Garrett Saunders though he wasn’t foolish enough to say it to the judge’s face during the hearing.

Roy and Ben exchanged worried glances, and both men got the same impression of the boy’s attitude at the time.  They both realized that Little Joe had no idea as to how fortunate he was that Judge Wheeler hadn’t been tougher on him.

“Well, Roy, I need to get on home and see how Hoss is doing.  Thank you for taking care of things,” Ben said and shook the sheriff’s hand.

“You let me know how Hoss is coming along and I’ll be sure to let you know when that trial is scheduled, Ben.  Little Joe – now you act right, you hear?”

“Yes, Sir,” Joe responded quietly as his father opened the door and held it for him to walk outside.  He dreaded the ride home and what Pa was going to say to him.

“The buckboard is down the street,” Ben addressed his son as they stepped onto the wooden walkway in front of the courthouse.

“I want to ride Cochise home,” Joe replied bluntly, never looking over at his father.

Ben stopped in his tracks and stared down at his son. “I took her back to the ranch last night.  Now let’s get going.”

Little Joe drew in a deep breath as he tried to fight back his increasing anger.  He knew that it was going to be a long ride home.

************

As the buckboard advanced towards the Ponderosa there was a stark silence between both father and son with neither of them venturing to speak their mind.  Ben was in a quandary over what he should say to Little Joe.  He was still very upset with the boy over what he had almost done the prior day.  But he also felt the twinge of regret over having shot him.  Ben decided to wait the boy out to see what he was going to say and take it from there.  However, when they weren’t all that far from the ranch house he had finally surrendered to the inevitable and decided that it was time to discuss what had happened.

“Now, Joseph,” Ben paused as he pulled back on the reins bringing the buckboard to a sudden stop.  “Go ahead out with it.  I can read the anger all over that face of yours.”

“Pa – how could you just up and shoot me?” Little Joe sounded out indignantly.

“I shot you, Young Man, so you wouldn’t hang for shooting Saunders who was unarmed!”

“Nobody else was there – so nobody would’ve ever known what I’d done.  It was just you and me and that bastard!” Joe insisted.

“You’d better watch your language, Joseph.  If you think that you’re mad with me – well – you haven’t been paying much attention because I happen to be furious with you!” Ben yelled as he grabbed Joe’s left forearm, locking it tightly in his grasp.

“Fine Pa!” Little Joe replied hotly.  “Go ahead – hit me if you want to.  You’ve already shot me, so it won’t be the worst thing you’ve ever done.”

“Joseph, you’d better stop right now.  I’ve had quite enough of that temper of yours!” Ben warned as he forced his son’s gaze.  “Now to get back to what I was alluding to.  Yes, it was only the three of us out there as you got ready to kill Saunders.  But, if you had gunned him down, I would’ve been the one who had to testify against my own son, and you would’ve been hung for doing it.”

“No, you wouldn’t have had to testify against me, Pa!  You’d never have to tell anyone anything!  No- one would’ve found his body until I was long gone,” Joe insisted as he tried to rationalize what he had almost done to Garrett Saunders.

“Joseph, it would’ve been a case of pure murder!” Ben shouted again.  “You just can’t go gunning down a man who is unarmed and who hasn’t had a trial yet.”

Joe fired back, “He shot Hoss and we all know it!  And he robbed him and beat him and left him for dead.  Hoss identified him so trial or no trial he’s guilty as sin!”

“You lied to the judge, Young Man, and you know it.  You were going to kill him – just shoot him dead!  If you thought that you were so all-fired right about doing that then why didn’t you tell Judge Wheeler what you were really planning to do to Saunders?”

“No need to,” Joe responded curtly.

“You lied in a court of law, Joseph,” Ben angrily reprimanded the boy.

“Why should I have told that judge the truth? He was wrong.  I had every right to kill Saunders!  He almost killed my brother!” Joe answered hotly, his temper peaking once more.

“Joseph, I’m in no mood to keep going over this.  You’ve not listened to one single word I’ve said.  I want you to sit there and be quiet because you’re only making me angrier.  Now hold your tongue, Boy, and that’s not a suggestion it’s an order.”

Little Joe closed his mouth though his jaw worked back and forth, readying to fuss some more.  He fought to hold it all inside, but Joe’s face showed that he was about ready to let loose his fiery temper and things would get even more adversarial between them.

Finally releasing his son’s arm, Ben prepared to send the team of horses forward.

“I want to walk the rest of the way,” Joe shot out, his tone of voice revealing that he could no longer sit in silence though it was obviously what his father expected him to do.

Ben groaned and shook his head wearily.  “There’s only about a half a mile until we’re home.  Go ahead and climb out, Joseph.  However, I will be right behind you because I’ve got no intention of taking my eyes off you.”

Little Joe hopped out of the buckboard and began to walk back to the ranch house.

“And stay on the road, Joseph, or I’ll get out of this wagon and deal with you,” Ben warned as he sent the team of horses forward.  ***Yes, you go ahead and walk off some of that anger, Boy. *** Ben shook his head as he watched Little Joe trying to outpace the buckboard.  *** You still don’t have any idea why I shot you. Oh, Joseph, what can I say to you, so you’ll finally understand why I did that? *** he sighed as he tapped the reins to quicken the pace.

*************

The buckboard pulled in front of the ranch house a short time later and Ben stepped down.  He cast a quick look behind him to see Little Joe’s approach.  Drawing in a deep breath he called out to him.

“Joseph, put away the team and come inside.”

Frowning, Little Joe walked over to the wagon and began to unhitch the two horses, never looking over at his father.  Ben walked inside the house and was met by his eldest at the door.

“How’d it go, Pa?”

Ben shrugged out of his suitcoat and tossed it onto the back of the settee before answering his son’s question.

“The judge did his best to try and talk some sense into your brother – for what good it did.  Joseph still hasn’t accepted that what he tried to do was wrong,” He paused and looked towards the stairs.  He changed the subject, not wanting to get into everything just then.  “How’s Hoss doing?”

“He ate all his lunch, Pa – but he’s been hurting a lot.  Doc came out and said that we need to keep him quiet and give him that pain medicine for a few more days.”

“You didn’t tell him about the hearing, did you?”

“No, Sir – Hoss doesn’t have any idea what Little Joe has been up to.  Hoss did ask about him, and I just told him that you sent him into town on some errands.”

“Good.  Hoss doesn’t need to know anything about what that boy has gotten himself into until he’s doing better.

“I agree but what about Joe – did you tell him that?”

“No – we really haven’t talked only yelled,” Ben frowned.

“You need me to talk to him for you?” Adam offered, hoping to take some of the weight off his father’s shoulders.  He had read the worry all over Pa’s face and was concerned over what Little Joe had been putting him through.

Shooting an apprehensive look over to the front door Ben sighed.  “I’d better do it, Son.  I’m also going to have to lay down some strict rules for the boy, but I suppose all of that can keep until I go check on Hoss.  Will you go watch out for Joseph until I come down?”

Adam reached over and patted his father’s arm to try to get him to relax a little.  “Sure, Pa – take your time.  I’ll go check on Joe.”

Nodding his appreciation to his son, Ben retrieved his suit coat from the settee and brought it with him upstairs.

**************

Ben knew that he would have to remove his suit and get back into regular working clothes, or his son might suspect that something was being kept from him.  He changed quickly, wanting to go check on Hoss to see how he was doing.  Walking into his middle boy’s room, Ben smiled over at the big man lying in the bed propped up on pillows.

“Well, there, Young Man, how are you feeling?” He asked as he took a seat in the chair next to the bed and placed a hand on Hoss’ arm.

“I’m okay, Pa.”

“Adam told me that you’ve been hurting quite a bit.  Now tell me the truth, Hoss, is that wound hurting you?”

Wincing his face as he tried to pull himself up in the bed, Hoss tried to downplay his pain.  “Nothing that I can’t handle, Pa.”

Ben nodded as a knowing smile pulled up his lips.  “I see – you think I can’t read you anymore is that the case?”

“Okay—it smarts a bit,” Hoss grinned when he realized that he never could pull one over on his father.

Reaching for the bottle of medicine on the nightstand, Ben poured a good dose onto the tablespoon and brought it to Hoss’ lips.  “Open up.”

Hoss reluctantly gave into his father’s insistence and swallowed the bitter tasting medicine before settling back against his pillows.

“Looks to me like we need to get some ice for that very colorful face of yours,” Pa said and softly touched his son’s forehead to detect if he was running a fever.  He was relieved to find Hoss’ brow cool to the touch.

“I’ll be okay, Pa – stop your worrying.”

“You three boys are all the same when it comes to being hurt.  None of you ever admit to me when you’re not feeling well.  In a few days I’ll have to hog-tie you to this bed to keep you down,” Ben mused as he placed the spoon back on the nightstand and leaned forward in the chair.  “I’ll send someone to the blockhouse to get that ice.  But until then I want you to rest, Son.”

“Where’s Little Joe?  I haven’t seen him all day.”

*** I guess it’s time for a necessary lie! *** Ben thought to himself.  “Oh, your little brother was in earlier, but you were napping.  I’ve given that boy extra chores to keep him busy, so he won’t sit here staring at you.  Well, you know Little Joe – it worries him whenever you’re hurt.”

Hoss yawned and then fought against his desire to fall back to sleep.

“You close those eyes, Young Man.  Doc says the more rest you get the faster you’ll heal,” Ben whispered and watched as Hoss finally gave in to his exhaustion and fell back to sleep.  Standing from his chair, Pa pulled the covers up to his son’s chin and patted Hoss’ arm gently before quietly turning out of the bedroom.

**************

Little Joe had put away the team of horses and then headed into the barn to see Cochise.  He found the currycomb and moved inside the horse’s stall.  As was typical, Joe talked to Cochise as he groomed her.  He spoke out in a low grim tone, telling the animal all his troubles.  Just a few minutes after he began to curry his horse, Little Joe noticed the presence in the barn now standing opposite him.

“What are you doing watching me?” He asked annoyed by his brother’s interruption.  Joe had wanted to be alone with Cochise because he believed her to be the only one on the ranch who truly understood him.

“Just wondering what you were doing that’s all, Little Joe,” Adam returned moving closer to the boy.

“What’s it look like I’m doing?” Joe retorted angrily.  He presumed that his father had sent his brother to spy on him to make sure he hadn’t ridden off.

“It looks like you’re spoiling for a fight with me,” Adam said frustration in his tone of voice.

“If I was, you’d know it,” Joe fired back.  “Now that you’ve found me leave.”

“I guess you’re mad at everyone right about now aren’t you, Little Joe?”

“So, what if I am?”

“It couldn’t be because you finally realized that you were in the wrong, could it?”

“If I wanted a lecture I’d go in the house and find Pa,” Joe insisted and moved to the other side of his horse trying to ignore his brother.

Adam moved in closer to Joe and reached over and took the currycomb out of his hand to force his attention.  Little Joe looked over at him, incensed by what he had done.

“Hand it back!”

“Not until you and I have a little talk,” Adam replied.  “Now why did you go off and try to kill Saunders, Kid?”

“Why don’t you go into the house and take a good long look at Hoss and then ask me that!”

“I’ve seen our brother and it hurts me just as much as it does you – and it hurts our pa even more.  But Hoss getting hurt doesn’t give you the right to run off and try to murder the man who did it!”

“You’d rather he gets off, huh?” Joe spat back his anger mounting.

“Joe, he’s not going to get off.  Hoss will testify against him when he’s better and Saunders will go to prison.”

“He deserves to die for what he did!”

Adam shook his head and groaned.  “Little Joe, no matter how any of us feel about what that evil man did to Hoss it doesn’t give us the right to shoot him down in cold blood.  Pa said he didn’t even have his gun on him when you drew down on him.  What gives YOU the right to shoot and kill an unarmed man?”

Little Joe, filled with rage, made his way out of the stall and shoved his brother as he left the barn.  Adam followed and grabbed the boy’s elbow, spinning him around.

“It’s that temper of yours that will be your downfall, Kid!” Adam shouted.

Joe broke away from his brother’s hold and stared at him hard.  His left hand balled up into a fist, he reared it back readying to hit his brother.

“Joseph!” Ben shouted as he moved towards the barn.  “Get over here right this minute!”

Standing his ground, Little Joe didn’t budge from his position though he dropped his left arm back down to his side.  Ben jogged over to his two sons and stared at them both.

“What exactly is going on here?” He asked looking back and forth between the two of them.

“Just warning the kid about his temper, Pa – for what little good it did,” Adam explained quietly.

“Why don’t you mind your own business, Adam?” Joe sneered.

“In the house now, Joseph,” Ben said sternly.

“I’m not done grooming my horse.”

“Yes, you are,” Ben replied and glared at the boy.

Little Joe shot a very displeased look at his father, but he wasn’t about to rile Pa up any more than he already was.  He angrily headed towards the house without another word.

“Adam, I just put water on the stove.  I’m going to make that boy take a bath and then I’ll speak to him about following the new rules I have for him.  Why don’t you go sit with Hoss for a while?”

Sighing to himself, Adam stared at his father.  He could easily read the tenseness on the man’s face due to his brother’s behavior.

“Joe was spoiling for a fight with me, Pa.  I guess you were right.  Whatever the judge told him today didn’t change his mind about attempting to gun down an unarmed man.  He still thinks it was okay to kill Saunders.”

“I know,” Ben sighed wearily as he turned back towards the house alongside his son.  “Just let me handle it for now – I don’t want the two of you to get into a fistfight over it.”

“I’ll try, Pa,” Adam agreed and slung an arm across his father’s shoulder to offer him some moral support.  He hated to see Pa so upset due to his brother’s inability to admit that he had been wrong for taking the law into his own hands.

**************

Though he had protested taking a bath, Little Joe finally yielded to his father’s insistence that he needed one.  Ben was relieved that the boy had gone into the bathhouse as it gave him some badly needed peace and quiet.  It hadn’t lasted long, because just as soon as Little Joe bathed and put on clean clothes, Ben was forced to talk to him concerning the new rules he would be required to follow.  He stood in the living room and squared off with his youngest.

Folding his arms across his chest and frowning, Little Joe looked up from the settee at his father who stood in front of the fireplace.  He knew that there would be a lecture forthcoming and he wasn’t at all in the mood for one at the time.

“Joseph, now you heard what Judge Wheeler said regarding leaving this ranch.  You are not to go off anywhere without either Adam or me with you-” Ben began but his son cut him off.

“He just said that I couldn’t be in town for the trial – he didn’t say I had to have bodyguards!” Little Joe protested.

Ben frowned and pointed his index finger at the boy.  “You heard me tell him that you wouldn’t go anywhere without a chaperone!   And don’t raise your voice to me again, Joseph, I’m warning you.”

“I might just as well have stayed in that jailcell,” Joe muttered angrily.

“Well, that can be arranged, Young Man,” Ben warned and watched as his son looked away.  Clearing his throat he continued, “As for the gun situation.  You are not to touch a gun of any kind, do you understand?”

“Okay,” Joe mumbled, staring down at the floor.

“Look at me when I’m talking to you.”

“Fine,” Joe returned and stared over at his father.

“Joseph,” Ben sighed as he neared the boy.  He sat down in the chair opposite Little Joe trying to force a calm to the hostility which had fallen like a thick storm cloud over the room.  “I’d prefer not to shout at you.  I realize you are still upset over all that’s gone on the last couple of days.  But acting up and raising your voice isn’t going to help anything.”

“When can I go and see Hoss?” Joe changed the subject.  He knew that he wasn’t about to see eye to eye with his father no matter what he said about the new restrictions.   He also knew that they would never agree about what he had done regarding killing Garrett Saunders.

“I’ll get to that but first I want to make sure that we are on the same page about these rules, Joseph.”

*** Same page? Pa, we’re not even reading the same book! *** Joe thought to himself.

“Well?”

“Fine – you want me to be a prisoner here – I understand.  And I guess I’ll just forget all about being able to defend myself too,” Joe argued the validity of both points.

“You almost killed a man who could use that same argument—he didn’t have a gun either,” Ben returned glaring at his son.

Angered once again, Little Joe jumped from his position on the settee and waved his right arm in the air.  “But I didn’t almost beat someone to death, Pa!” He shouted.

“Hold your voice down!  I’m not going to say it again.  The brother who you’ve said you’re so worried about is trying to sleep,” Ben admonished as he stood and approached the boy.  “Now listen to me and listen to me well.  You are going to stay on this ranch and you’re not to run off anywhere without one of us with you.  You aren’t going to touch any gun or rifle either.  Now, have I made myself clear?”

“Fine,” Joe returned quietly.  “Okay now what about me seeing Hoss?”

“Not tonight,” Ben answered.

“Why not?”

“Because you’re going to have to be able to control yourself a whole lot better than you’ve shown me today before I let you see him.  Hoss has been in a lot of pain and the doctor said he needs his rest.”

“I’m not going to get him upset – I just want to see him,” Joe protested.

“I’ve given you my answer, Joseph.”

Little Joe simply walked towards the staircase without saying another word.  He had had enough of his father’s lectures, his rules and his orders not to see his brother.  Ben watched his son walk up the stairs feeling distraught over the contentious attitude he’d witnessed coming from his youngest.  Normally he and Little Joe had a warm and loving relationship which was now strained due to what had happened between them.  He wished that he could get through to the boy and make him realize that everything he had done was for his own good.

*************

Little Joe had spent time in his room shunning his family and mulling over all that had happened in the last few days.  His mood was glum and he was extremely angry about all the new restrictions which had been placed on him.  Most of all he was upset over his father’s insistence that he wasn’t allowed to look in on his brother Hoss.  It bothered him so much that he had looked out in the hallway a few times to see if Pa or Adam were both downstairs so he could quietly steal into his brother’s bedroom regardless of what his father had said.  Unfortunately, each time he had looked one or both men were either going into the room or just coming out of it. Just a little past seven that night Adam knocked on his door and told him to come down for supper.  Joe had wanted to ignore his brother and refuse to go down to the dining room, but he had to acquiesce or face the strong possibility that Pa would come up to his room and order him to go down and join them at the dinner table.

Ben watched as his youngest took a seat just to his right without saying a word.  He nodded across the table at Adam that he should just ignore his brother’s ill mood.

“I put the new timber contract on your desk, Pa.  I looked it over when it came this morning and I think it’ll be okay to sign it,” Adam announced and began to eat his supper.

“Thank you, Son.”

Little Joe placed his right hand on his left shoulder and rubbed his upper arm where his father had shot him.  He had done it twice and each time Pa had noticed.  Throughout supper Joe never said a word; he simply toyed with the food on his plate, showing his displeasure at having to sit there with both his father and brother.

“Fletcher brought the ice from the blockhouse, and I think it’s helping with Hoss’ bruising already,” Ben mentioned, hoping the information might ease Little Joe’s mind.  The boy still sat in silence, as if he hadn’t heard.

“Yeah – I thought it looked like the swelling has gone down some too, Pa,” Adam jumped in.  He had also felt the uneasiness around the table since Little Joe hadn’t said a word ever since he had taken his place

Ben had witnessed Joe rubbing his shoulder for the third time and thought that he should say something about it.

“Is that wound bothering you, Joseph?” Ben asked quietly.

Joe finally looked up from his plate and stared at his father.  “My wound?  Oh – you mean my bullet wound, Pa?” He replied, filled with sarcasm.

“Cut it out, Joe,” Adam warned his brother.  He knew that the boy was attempting to make their father feel bad.

Little Joe turned towards his brother and said, “Cut what out? Pa asked me a question, and I just wanted him to be specific.”

“Joseph,” Ben began, clearing his throat.  “Hold your voice down.”

“Oh, sorry, Pa.  Now — what did you ask me again?”

“Joe – I’m warning you ease up on Pa,” Adam reiterated his earlier warning.

“Okay – you asked me how my bullet wound was doing, right, Pa?” Joe persisted.

“I asked how your wound was, yes,” Ben nodded trying his best to ignore his son’s ill placed remarks.

“It’s just great,” Little Joe answered.  “Thanks for asking.”

“I could do without the sarcasm tonight, Young Man,” Ben returned, not wanting another argument.

“Then don’t mention my having this bullet wound – since we all know how I got it.”

“Pa, if you’re not going to hit the kid then I am,” Adam insisted having had enough of his brother for one evening.

“Come on ahead, Adam – see how far you get!” Joe shouted and stood from the table.

Ben clamped his right hand onto Joe’s left forearm and roughly tugged him back into his chair.  “I will handle your brother,” He called over to Adam.  “Now as for you, Joseph, you’d do well to keep a civil tongue in your mouth as I have had quite enough.  The next rude remark and the two of us will be going out to the barn.”

Little Joe, throwing caution to the wind, replied, “Sure, Pa.  Go on and do it – hit me why don’t you?  I mean after being shot by you what’s a mere tanning anyway?”

Adam reached over and shoved his brother’s right shoulder, knocking him out of his chair and down to the floor.

Joe quickly recovered from the shock of his brother’s move and sprang to his feet, his left hand balled up into a fist for the second time that day.

Knowing that he had to get the situation under control before his sons began an all-out war in the dining room, Pa abruptly stood from the table pushing his chair back with the movement.  Taking Joe’s fist into his right hand, Ben pulled his son away from the table and over to the living room.  “Young Man, you get yourself up to your room right now.  And don’t you dare slam that bedroom door and disturb Hoss!”

Joe opened his mouth, readying another complaint but he read the warning in Pa’s eyes which said more than mere words could ever do.  He kept quiet but didn’t leave the living room.

“Now!” Ben growled and pointed to the stairs.

Casting a parting fiery glance over at his brother, he turned for the staircase and hurriedly made his way up to his room.

*************

Little Joe sat up in his bedroom for hours caught up in his morose musings.  He couldn’t get over the fact that Garrett Saunders was being housed in the Virginia City Jail and getting three square meals a day while his brother Hoss was still lying in his bed in pain and dealing with the bullet wound that the man had caused.  And not only that, but Hoss’ face was a mass of cuts and bruises, and Saunders had escaped unscathed due to his father’s intervention.  Joe felt as though no-one understood him nor his intentions and why he felt it was justified to kill the man who had almost ended his brother’s life.  Swept away in his thoughts, Little Joe hadn’t heard his bedroom door opening nor seen his father’s entry.

Ben walked over to the bed carrying with him the medicine that Doctor Martin had left for him to tend to his son’s wound.  He noticed the boy sitting over by his window staring out into the darkness.

“Come over here, Joseph, and pull off your shirt so I can have at that wound.”

“I don’t want any doctoring,” Joe muttered, never looking over at his pa.

Setting the medicine down onto the boy’s bed, Ben turned to face his son.  “You’d best to what I just said, Joseph,” Ben reiterated his prior command.

“I just don’t know why –” Joe began but Pa quickly cut him off.

“I don’t want to hear another word out of your mouth tonight, Young Man.  I’ve had my fill of your terrible attitude.  You’d best mind what I’ve just told you to do, or you’ll need medicine for your backside as well as for your arm.  Now remove that shirt or I’ll do it for you,” Ben commanded.

Little Joe mashed his lips together filled with more anger than he knew what to do with.  But he wasn’t a fool either, as he read both Pa’s eyes and the firm set to his shoulders.  He knew that his father was fully prepared to make good on his threat and he even had one hand on the buckle of his belt to prove that he was serious.  Joe was quick to unbutton his shirt and set it next to him in the chair.  He then stood and moved over to his bed and sat down.

Pa opened the tin of medicine and set it on top of the bed again.  He neared the boy and slowly unwrapped the gauze bandage on his son’s left arm.  Holding onto Joe’s bare shoulder Ben studied the condition of the wound.  His heart fell in his chest after seeing the stitches for the first time since he had shot his son.  ***My God, did I do this? It’s not a simple graze – it’s deeper than I thought.  Paul didn’t tell me he had to put sutures in you, Joseph!  Or maybe it just looks worse because I’m the one who sent the bullet that did this and I still feel guilty about it? *** He thought to himself and fought the welling of tears in his eyes.  *** I never wanted to hurt you like this, Joseph.  I would rather take a bullet myself than to have done what you forced me to do out there. ***

Little Joe had noticed that his father’s hand wasn’t moving and remained there, resting on top of his left shoulder as if the man was deep in thought.  He wondered what Pa was thinking about but didn’t dare ask him.  Joe felt the distance that now separated the two of them and though it hurt him much more than his wound did at the time there wasn’t a thing he could do about it.  His father didn’t understand him anymore, Joe knew that and there wasn’t any talking the man out of the position he had taken regarding what had happened with Garrett Saunders.

Finally recovering from the sight of his son’s wound, Ben carefully spread the salve around the area, trying his best to avoid tugging at the stitches.  Reaching inside the pocket of his vest, he withdrew the new gauze.  He slowly encircled his son’s arm with the bandage and tied it off.  Drawing in a deep breath to regroup his emotions, he finally spoke.

“Don’t bother to put that shirt back on,” he said and walked to the boy’s dresser and pulled out a nightshirt.  “Young Man, put this nightshirt on and go to sleep,” Ben neared Little Joe and handed it to him.  “And don’t even think about leaving this room until I come up here in the morning.  If you attempt to sneak out when my back is turned then from here on out, I’ll just go and find the key to your door and lock you inside here every night,” he warned and then gathered the medicine and the used gauze and made his way to the door.

Little Joe simply sat on the bed unmoving.

“Now get into that, Joseph and go to sleep like I just told you to do.”

“I don’t see why –” Joe tried to address what his father had said but once again Pa cut him off.

“Not one more word,” Ben ordered and left the bedroom.

Little Joe sat in strained silence and disbelief over what Pa had both said and done.  He finally pulled the nightshirt over his head.  He then removed his boots and pants and readied himself to go to sleep.  Joe felt more alone than he had ever remembered and he didn’t see that changing any time soon.  Willing away his tears Joe drew in a deep breath.  Still the ache in his heart remained. He missed his pa and the love that had existed between the two of them prior to Hoss getting shot.  Leaning back against his pillows, Little Joe closed his eyes and prayed that sleep would come to ease his sadness.

*************

Ben stood in quiet consternation just outside Little Joe’s bedroom.  He brushed aside the tears which had fallen from his eyes just as soon as it had been safe to do so.  His heart ached over all that had transpired between the two of them. He wished with all his heart that he could just go back inside the room and gather the boy up into his arms like he had wanted to do the minute he’d seen Joseph’s wound.  But as the boy’s father he couldn’t do that.  It wouldn’t help him in the long run.  Ben had been both a mother and a father to Little Joe and filling the role of two parents was never an easy thing to do.  He had tried to offer his son the tenderness of a mother while still maintaining the discipline of a father.  Ben knew that he had failed miserably at filling both roles, especially that night.  Now all he could do was to solely fill the role of the boy’s father and that meant that he couldn’t ignore what Joseph had done concerning taking the law into his own hands.  Ben also had to contend with his son’s bad behavior which he couldn’t overlook this time.  Sighing wearily, Ben turned and placed his hand on the bedroom door and closed his eyes. He missed his youngest son and the love that had existed between the two of them prior to Hoss being shot. Saying a silent prayer that someday he would be able to make Joseph understand why he had shot him, he turned and somberly walked away.

**************

Little Joe had spent a sleepless night because he had a habit of lying on his left side and, though he had fallen to sleep on his back, he found himself rolling over and putting weight on his injured arm which immediately awakened him.  He pulled himself out of bed at the crack of dawn and donned his clothes.   There wasn’t much he could do but wait for his father’s arrival in his room as Pa had warned him the previous night what was expected of him.

“I want to see Hoss,” Little Joe said the minute he noticed his father coming through the bedroom door.

“Not today,” Ben returned as he approached his son’s bed.

“Why?  You can’t say that I haven’t controlled myself today,” Joe argued using the logic from his father’s statement the previous day.

“The day has just started,” Ben countered.  “And besides that, your brother had a very rough night.”

Little Joe stared into his father’s eyes and knew that the man was holding something back from him.  He stood from his bed and approached him.  “What’s wrong with Hoss?”

Ben studied his son’s face, and the worry was already etched on it, so he tried not to rile the boy up so early in the day.  He chose his words carefully.

“Joseph, his fever went up late last night.  I’m sure Hoss will be okay, but as a precaution, I’ve sent Adam into town to bring Paul here.”

“I want to see my brother,” Joe responded with an urgency in his tone.

Worried that seeing Hoss would send Joe off on another tangent, Ben tried to come up with a middle ground.

“I’ll let you peek in on him for just a minute.  But he’s sleeping and I don’t want you to wake him.  Do you understand?”

Little Joe nodded and followed his father out into the hall.  He walked inside his brother’s bedroom quietly.  Staring down at his brother Joe remembered the vow he had made to him just a few nights prior and it ate at his guts that he hadn’t followed through on it.  He had told Hoss that he would get the man who had shot and pistol whipped him.  Reaching for the big man’s right hand, Little Joe eased his fingers around it and tried to will the strength back into him.

“That’s all for now, Joseph.  You go on downstairs and eat some breakfast – it’s on the table waiting for you,” Ben whispered.

Fighting back his tears, Little Joe turned and walked out of the room.  His hate for Garrett Saunders churned in his gut so much that he felt physically ill.  If he could have left the ranch and ridden into Virginia City and yanked the man out of Roy Coffee’s jail and gunned him down, he would have.  But he knew that if he was spotted in town, he would most likely be arrested and then he’d not get to see Hoss until after the trial was over.  Joe made his way to the dining table and poured some coffee.  Food was the last thing he wanted.  The only thing he had a taste for was revenge.

**************

It had been a long afternoon for all the Cartwrights as Hoss’ fever had mounted until just after five when he showed signs that it was finally coming down.  Doctor Martin waited next to Hoss’ bed patiently, offering medical care for Hoss and instilling calm in the young man’s worried father.  Little Joe had done the same thing that he had done some three days prior and that was to pace there in front of the fireplace most of the day.  His temper had mounted along with his worry.  Though he had gone up to the second floor and attempted to see Hoss, Pa had insisted that he go back downstairs.  That had only fueled his anger as his father had allowed Adam to come into Hoss’ bedroom several times that afternoon.

Little Joe had gone to his room to avoid speaking to Adam who had attempted to talk to him on several occasions that afternoon, but he had shunned him.  Joe was still upset over his eldest brother’s interference and furious about the way that Adam had shoved him out of his chair at the dining table the previous night.

Due to not having slept more than a few hours, Little Joe finally succumbed to exhaustion and passed out in his bed, thus never hearing Doctor Martin’s carriage as it had left the front yard.  He awakened after hearing the knock on his bedroom door.  Pulling on his boots, Joe walked across the room and opened his door to see Adam standing there.

“Pa wants to see you downstairs, Joe,” Adam said staring down at his brother trying to gauge whether the boy’s face still reflected the anger he had worn for three straight days.

“Okay,” Joe nodded and moved out into the hall.

Both Adam and Little Joe sat in the living room without speaking as they waited for their father to come down from Hoss’ room where he had been most of the day.  He finally appeared walking down the stairs looking quite exhausted after the very stressful day he’d had.

“Hoss is better – and he’s sleeping right now,” Ben addressed his sons as he walked into the living room.

“What did Doc say?” Joe asked standing from his position on the settee.

Ben sighed, hoping that his youngest wasn’t going to put him through the kind of worry that he had for days.  It didn’t take much for Little Joe to get his dander up, and Pa just wanted some peace for a change.

“I’ll explain all of that after we eat.  Adam? Is the stew done?”

“Yes, Sir – all I have to do is get it into bowls and we can all sit down and eat.”

“Thank you, Son.  C’mon, Joseph, let’s go sit down,” Ben attempted a smile hoping to get one in return from the boy.  But that didn’t happen.

“I want to go sit with Hoss,” Joe replied insistently.

“No, Son, we are all going to eat.  Like I just told you Hoss is sleeping and Paul said to let him get as much rest as he can.  Now come on over to the table.”

As far as Little Joe was concerned Adam could just eat his own stew for all he cared.  He just wanted to sit next to his brother’s bed and wait for him to wake up.

“Can’t I just go and sit in his room?” Joe continued.

Ben put his hand on the boy’s shoulder and tried to steer him to the table in a gentle way so he would finally cooperate with him.  He couldn’t help noticing how Joe’s body had grown very rigid the minute he had touched him.  Ben presumed that it was yet another way that his son was showing his displeasure with him for having shot him.

“Joseph, we are eating now,” Ben stated firmly.

Begrudgingly Little Joe turned for the dining room with the hope that if he did as he had been instructed his father would be more apt to let him go and sit with his brother.  The three Cartwrights sat and ate their dinner.  The conversation around the table was only between Ben and Adam.  Joe ate his stew and refrained from speaking because he was afraid he’d say exactly what was on his mind.  He wanted to go and kill Garrett Saunders, and it was written all over his face.

As soon as the table had been cleared of the dishes, they all moved back into the living room sitting in front of the newly stoked fire.

“So – what did Doc say about Hoss?” Joe asked, having waited just as long as he could stand.  He needed to hear the details about his brother’s current condition.

Ben frowned, he could read the apprehension all over Joe’s face.  “Your brother has had a rough day, however Paul assured me that Hoss will make a full recovery.  His fever finally went down and now it’s just a matter of him getting rest and not letting him get riled up about anything.  He knows nothing about what you did, Joseph, and I want it to stay that way.”

Little Joe stood from the settee and angrily waved his right arm in the air.  “Well, that’s just great!  My brother had to go through all this due to being shot and pistol whipped!  I guess you don’t want him to ever learn the truth about what happened. And I suppose that you’ll never tell Hoss that I could’ve killed Saunders for him if it wasn’t for my father shooting me!” Joe’s sarcasm bled out in his loud rant.

“That’s enough,” Ben said sternly, standing from his chair.  “Joseph, it’s been a very long day, and I’ll not tolerate any more of your shouting tonight.”

Adam witnessed the stress on his father’s face and his anger kindled towards his youngest brother.  “Joe, you’d better let up on Pa, or I’ll take you out to the barn myself,” He threatened.

“You can just shut the hell up, Adam!” He replied caustically, casting a sneer over to his brother.

“I said that’s enough, Joseph.  And you’d better watch that language — I’m not going to keep repeating myself.”

“Oh, I get it – Adam can sit there and threaten me, and I’m supposed to be polite, huh, Pa?”

“No more, Young Man, final warning,” Ben tried to get the boy’s attention with his tone of voice.  Usually, Little Joe would know to stop his protests once his father warned him with the stern inflection in his tone of voice and in his stern glare, but that night there was no getting the boy to simmer down.

“I don’t know why you asked me to come down here,” Joe fussed, refusing to back down.

“I called you down here to speak to you, not get into a shouting match,” Ben countered.

“Speak to me?” Joe returned and laughed bitterly.  “Why just speak to me, Pa?  You and Adam could just go and get your guns and shoot me!  Isn’t that the best way to show me how much you care?”

Adam launched himself out of his chair upon hearing what his brother had said to their father.  He reached for Little Joe, but Pa jumped in between the two brothers to prevent them from having a fistfight right there in the living room.

“You had better apologize to Pa, Joe!  Stop blaming him for your errors in judgement,” Adam called over to his brother.

“I said it before and I’ll say it again.  Shut the hell up, Adam!” Joe yelled, his temper having reached its breaking point.

Ben grabbed Little Joe’s left hand which was balled into a fist in preparation to turn it loose on his brother.

“Out to the barn, Joseph, I’ve warned you over and over again about using that kind of language and about your shouting too!”

“Fine!  Go ahead, Pa — I don’t care!” Joe returned indignantly.

Ben turned his son towards the front door while Adam stood there shaking his head over what his brother had both said and done that night.  He knew that their father had been pushed to the brink by the boy and Pa had to get back in control before Joe did something rash like going back into town to kill Garrett Saunders.  Adam wouldn’t have put it past his brother to do something just that foolish due to his terrible temper.

**************

A few minutes after he had fired off at his brother, Little Joe found himself standing opposite his father in the barn.  He watched as Pa loosened his belt and then stood there with it folded in his hand.

“You just had to keep defying me didn’t you, Joseph?  This is the very last thing I wanted to be doing tonight,” Ben insisted harshly.  “Now, I’ll give you one final chance.  If you can manage to offer up a sincere apology and promise to stop your threats and your yelling, maybe I can let you off with a warning.  But if not, I’m going to use this belt.”

Joe looked up at his father, defiance written all over his face.  He wasn’t going to back down or apologize, and it showed.  He calmly reached down and pulled his shirttails out from his pants.  He then turned around, placing his hands up onto one of the stalls.

“Is this REALLY the way you want it, Joseph?  Would it kill you to apologize?  And just how hard is it for you to hold your tongue?” Ben questioned incredulously, still hoping that the boy would relent and realize the error of his ways and offer an apology to him.

“I don’t have anything to say to you.  If you’re going to hit me then go ahead and have at it.  I don’t care anymore,” He replied in a voice totally devoid of any emotion and stubbornly refusing to face his pa.

Drawing in a deep breath, upset over what he was now being forced to do, Ben sent out the first clap of his belt.  Joe made no sound, as though he hadn’t felt a thing.  He continued to punish his son, very measured in the way that he wielded his belt.  Ben hit him just hard enough to make it hurt but not enough to cause any lasting damage to the boy.  He sent ten slaps from the belt onto his son’s backside and then stopped.  Once Little Joe realized that his punishment had ended, he turned back around to face his father.

Ben stared hard at his boy, amazed that there was no appearance of tears in his eyes nor any other sign that he was hurt or sorry about what had led to the tanning.   Upset over his inability to get through to his son, Ben reached for Little Joe’s shoulders and forced his gaze.

“Where’s my son?  Are you even in there anymore?  You forced me to shoot you and now you’ve forced me to give you a tanning too.  What else?  Joseph, you aren’t the same boy that I raised.  Ever since we found Hoss you’ve been filled with nothing but hate and revenge.  Is your hate for Saunders more than your love for me?  Don’t you think that I’ve wanted to kill that man?  Hoss is my son, he’s your brother— but he’s my son!  I could’ve shot him the night that I shot you.  I had him in my sights just like I had you in them.  You forced me to shoot my own son instead of that vile man.  Do you have any idea what that did to me?  Do you know how hard it is to see your wound and know that I caused it?  Joseph, look at me!  In the name of God tell me what’s happened to the boy I raised – the boy I love more than my own life!  You would’ve been hanged for killing Saunders – how many times do I have to say it?”

Little Joe finally spoke out in a cool deliberate tone, “No, Pa, I wouldn’t have!  All you had to do was to just ride away and never say anything about it.”

“You know better than that, Joseph. It would have been murder!  No matter how much I love you I couldn’t have turned a blind eye to that!  Haven’t I taught you anything?  It wasn’t your right to kill an unarmed man – even though we know what he did to Hoss,” Ben explained once again though he could tell that his son hadn’t listened at all to his other pleas.

“Then we don’t have anything to talk about, Pa.  You think that I was wrong and I think you were.  I’m your son – you’re supposed to love me – but instead you protected Saunders and shot me!”

“Why – why can’t I reach you, Joseph?” Ben asked with exasperation in his voice.  “Why can’t you see how much love it took for me to do that?”

“Yeah, sure, Pa – just like the tanning!  You strapped me to show me how much you love me, right?”

Ben shook his head sadly.  His heart was breaking over the fact that his youngest couldn’t understand any of his actions nor the reasons behind them.

“Joseph, I warned you a half a dozen times that I’d have to bring you out here if you didn’t stop your constant ill remarks aimed at me and your brother.  You refused to listen to me.  Did you really think that I would just let you continue to defy me?  I’m your father!”

“Yeah, you’re my father – so I guess you’ve got the right to shoot me – give me a tanning – anything you think that’s best for me, right?”

Ben sighed, nothing was ever easy when it came to trying to get through to his youngest son.  He hurt so badly over the whole miserable situation, and he was still no closer to getting it resolved than what he had been before he had pulled Joe into the barn.  He raised his right hand and witnessed Little Joe flinching his face as though he was preparing himself for a slap.  Ben’s hand gently settled down onto his son’s left cheek.

“Joseph, come back to me – you’re in there I know that you are.  Hate is preventing you from coming back to me.  Fight your way out of its hold,” He pleaded with the boy.

Joe stared up at Pa never showing the slightest sign that what he had said had gotten through to him.

“I love you, Joseph – does that even matter to you anymore?  Do you even want that from me anymore?” Ben whispered sadly.

At any other time in his life, if he had heard Pa saying those things, Little Joe would have fallen into his arms and cried with regret over the way that he had acted and what he had said.  He also would have begged his father to forgive him.   Now, however, he simply stood there, with anger still very evident on his face, and said nothing.

“Bring me back my son – please,” Ben attempted to get his message into the boy’s mind and heart.

“Which one?  The son you shot or the son who you’ve just used your belt on?” Joe returned indignantly.

“The son who has a terrible temper, is hardheaded but the son I love – in spite of all of that,” he responded and shook his head over what the boy had said to him.

Little Joe dropped his head down to his chest, thus breaking away from his father’s touch.  Ben sighed wearily and temporarily had to admit to defeat.  But he wasn’t going to give up on the boy; he couldn’t.

Drawing in a deep breath, Ben called over to the boy, “Alright, Joseph, let’s go back into the house.”

Joe tucked his shirttails back into his pants, not willing to allow Adam to see some of the evidence of what had happened in the barn with their father.  He hoped that his brother wouldn’t make any snide remarks about the tanning because Joe knew that if he did, he’d be forced to haul out and hit him.

Ben walked out of the barn and stood there just outside the doorway quietly threading the belt back onto his trousers.  His stomach churned over what he had just done and how he had hurt his son yet again.  But he knew that Little Joe had purposely brought it all on himself and had defiantly refused to apologize for what he had said and done.  Pa couldn’t understand the boy’s motivation and why he had spoiled for a fight, but he had.  Ben and Joe made it into the house and noticed that Adam was still sitting there in the blue winged back chair.  Joe tried to avoid the obvious reason why he had been outside with Pa.  He headed to the stairs, never looking at his brother.

Once they heard Joe’s bedroom door close Ben sank down into his chair emotionally drained.

“I guess I don’t have to ask you how it went?” Adam asked drolly.

“No, you don’t,” Ben sighed.

“You still didn’t get anywhere with the kid?”

“No, Adam.  There’s never been a time when I’ve had to give that boy a tanning that he didn’t shed at least a few tears – with the exception of tonight.  And he never apologized – not even after I was through punishing him.  It was as though he didn’t feel a blame thing.  I just don’t know what to do with him.  I know he’s hurting – both emotionally and physically.  But you’d never know it by talking to him.”

“I’m sure you didn’t hit him too badly, Pa.”

“I hit him hard enough to make him walk in here very rigidly like he just did.  He’s just so mad that I wouldn’t let him kill Saunders and that I shot him to stop him from doing it.”

“Pa, why don’t you let me try and talk to him tomorrow?” Adam offered, hoping to take some of the weight off his father’s shoulders.

Ben shook his head adamantly.  “No, Adam, let me handle this.  He’s been at your throat already because he knows that you believe that what I did was warranted.  Leave him be and I’ll keep trying to get through to him.”

“Are you going to let him see Hoss?”

“If he behaves himself and doesn’t let on to your brother what he did – and what he forced me to do, then I will,” Ben answered and then stood from his chair.  “I’ve got to go and put that medicine on his arm before he nods off,” he sighed as he advanced to the stairs.

**************

Little Joe rinsed his face off at the water basin several times trying to rid himself of all that had transpired out in the barn.  It didn’t work.  All he wanted to do was go to sleep and forget everything that had happened that night.  Turning around, he made his way to the dresser and pulled out a nightshirt.  Walking over to the bed he eased down to pull his boots off and grimaced from the way his backside was hurting due to the damage caused by his father’s belt.  Joe had just removed his shirt, boots, and socks and was readying to remove his pants when his father walked inside the room.

“Let me see your arm, Joseph,” He called over to the boy as he neared the bed.

Joe never made a sound and only stood there waiting for what was to come of his father’s visit.

Ben unwound the gauze and once again put his hand on his son’s shoulder as he inspected the wound.

“Looks a bit festered,” Pa whispered more to himself than to his son.

He walked to the washstand and soaked a cloth and then wrung out the excess water.  Making his way back over to Joe, he gently dabbed at the wound.

“Is it hurting very much, Son?”

“What difference does that make to you?” Little Joe asked with bitterness coming out in his words.

“Sit down on the bed,” Ben returned, knowing that the boy wasn’t going to talk straight with him by the expression that he was wearing.

Joe gave an ironic laugh and said, “Sit down?  Are you forgetting that you fixed me good out in the barn?  Love hurts, right, Pa?  You loved me enough to shoot me – so there’s that.  And you loved me enough to welt up my backside too.  I think I’ve had enough of your form of love.  I think I’d do a whole lot better if you hated me.”

“Fine – you stand there then.  I can tend you just fine sitting or standing.  But don’t you dare complain about that tanning, Young Man.  I gave you numerous warnings up to and including out in the barn.  I also gave you the option to apologize instead of being punished.  Had you done that you wouldn’t have a problem with sitting down right now.  You defiantly refused to say that you were sorry for anything that you’ve done.  Joseph, it’s about time that you accepted your own responsibility for all that has happened lately.  Now, listen to me, it’s late and I have no intention of standing here and arguing with you.  I’m going to take care of your arm so be quiet,” Ben reprimanded, unwilling to verbally spar with his son.

Finishing cleaning the wound, Ben opened the medicine and spread it carefully over the injury and then wrapped it with a new gauze bandage.

“Doc will be here tomorrow to see how Hoss is doing and I’ll have him take a look at this to make sure there’s no sign of infection.”

Little Joe felt his father’s hand as it had lingered on his bare shoulder.  He wondered why Pa had held it there for so long the same way he had done the previous night.

“Now that takes care of your arm,” Ben paused and cleared his throat while eyeing his son again.  “As for your backside – I’m sorry that it came to that – my having to give you a tanning.  But you left me no other choice due to your disobedience.”

“I know, Pa, you were just trying to prove to me how much you still loved me.  Yeah, just like this wound on my arm!” Joe responded sarcastically.

“Just stop it, Joseph,” Ben sighed and shook his head.  “Just go to bed and tomorrow you can get right back to telling me what a terrible father I am.  I’ve heard quite enough of that for one day,” Pa announced as he grabbed up the medicine and turned toward the door.

Little Joe watched the way that his father simply opened the door and closed it behind him without offering another word to him.  He removed the rest of his clothing and pulled the nightshirt over his head.  Joe was still fuming over all that his father had done to him from the gunshot three days ago to the tanning he had just given him that night.  He moved over to his bed and sprawled out onto his stomach.  Then, for the very first time since he had been shot by his pa, tears began to leave his eyes.  He hurt, he was angry, but foremost he felt betrayed.   And, after listening to the way that Pa had spoken to him right before he walked out of the room, he felt worse than he had while out in the barn.  Surrendering to his feelings of loss, Little Joe buried his face in his pillow and cried.  He had lost his father’s respect and understanding and he felt the exact same way towards Pa.  The man seemed more like a stranger to him now.  Their once unbreakable bond had been severed, possibly forever, and it felt like a death to him.  Joe prayed for sleep to come and take him away from the dreadful situation just so he could escape from all that had happened between his father and him.

Ben had lingered a few minutes out in the hall totally beside himself with both hurt and worry over his youngest son and all that had gone on the last three days.  He quietly, trying to avoid detection, opened Little Joe’s bedroom door and could see that the boy appeared to be crying into his pillow.  Though he hated to see his son looking so distraught, part of him was relieved to witness at least some kind of emotion other than anger coming out of the boy.  Pa eased the door closed again.  It wasn’t the right time to confront Joseph due to all that had been said between them that night.  Ben reasoned that he’d have to wait and hope that his son would be calmer the following day and perhaps a bit more open to repairing their relationship.  He walked away praying that his assumption would prove to be a correct one; at least there was always hope.

**************

Little Joe slept better than he had the previous night due to feeling spent after all the drama that had transpired between him and his family the last four days.  The light coming in from the gingham curtains pierced his eyes as he sat up in his bed and groaned.  ***Pa sure showed me how much he loves me last night! *** He thought to himself and quickly stood up.  Joe hurt both inside and out and he wished he could just mount Cochise and leave the ranch.  It was a foolish thought and he knew it.  Not only couldn’t he ride off due to the two sets of eyes which were watching him like a hawk but also because he didn’t think he could sit a saddle after what had happened out in the barn.  Little Joe had just dressed and pulled on his boots when his father walked inside his room.

“Good morning,” Ben called to his son, never knowing what response he was going to get from the boy.  Lately it had been like trying to predict which way a coin would fall, heads or tails, when it came to Joseph’s behavior.

“Morning,” Joe returned, his voice coming out very subdued.

“Come on down for breakfast I’ve just put it on the table.”

“I want to see Hoss first.”

“After you eat – then if you can abide by the rules I’ll allow –” Ben was cut off in midsentence.

“Allow?  I’ve got to wait to be allowed to see my own brother?” The pitch of Little Joe’s voice had returned to its former raised tone which was sharp as he challenged his father’s authority.

“Joseph, don’t start another day like the last several have gone between us.  Yes, I will allow you to see your brother after you eat if you can watch that temper and listen to what I’ve told you.”

“Fine,” Joe returned, attempting to hold in his anger for the present time.  He wanted to see Hoss, and he knew that he’d now have to go through his father for that to happen.

Ben turned out of the room with his son following him.  They made their way down the stairs and over to the dining table.  Adam walked in from the kitchen holding the coffee pot and placed it at the head of the table before taking his seat.  Little Joe slowly eased down onto the hard wooden seat and tried to stifle a groan.  He attempted to ignore the fact that both Pa and Adam were watching the way he sat gingerly in his chair.

Clearing his throat after watching his son’s obvious discomfort, Ben handed a cup of coffee to the boy and said, “Pass this down to your brother.”

Little Joe fought to comply with his father’s request.  He didn’t even want to look at his brother, let alone hand him his blasted coffee.  Witnessing Pa’s stern gaze directed at him, Joe supposed he was challenging him not to start the day by being belligerent.  He finally handed the coffee to Adam without looking into his eyes.

“Thanks,” Adam said nodding his head towards the boy who refused to look his way.

Pouring another cup of coffee, Ben set it down in front of his youngest.  Joe only acknowledged it with a nod of his head.  Had it been any other situation, Little Joe would have thanked pa, but his anger prevented him from offering any pleasantries.

While Ben and Adam conversed about ranch business, Joe just sat in his chair quietly sipping his coffee.  Internally he was fuming over everything that had happened between Pa and him.  He shifted in his chair trying to keep his full weight off his backside.  Joe hoped that neither Pa nor Adam could tell how bad he was hurting at the time.  He felt that it was humiliating enough that his father had taken him out to the barn and given him a tanning, but sitting there at the table and knowing that there were two sets of eyes on him felt emotionally excruciating.  Joe shot a subtle glance over his left shoulder and noticed that Pa was staring directly at him.  He could tell that his father knew just how much he was hurting but Joe figured that Pa thought that he was justified in doling out his form of punishment.

Little Joe dropped his head as he picked up his fork and toyed with the eggs on his plate.  An uneasy silence fell over the room prompting Ben to nod over at Adam.  He knew that his eldest was trying to come up with some topic that wouldn’t set Little Joe off again.  When Adam hadn’t been able to think of anything that would help the situation, Ben cleared his throat and gave it a try.

“Roy said that he would let us know when the judge has set the court date.  I think Judge Wheeler is probably going to wait until Hoss is up and around so he can testify.”

“Wouldn’t have needed a court date,” Litttle Joe muttered, never looking up from his plate.

Adam glanced over at his father and watched as the man frowned at the boy to his right.

“What was that, Joseph?” Ben asked, raising his eyebrows.

“Nothing,” Little Joe returned quietly.

“There’s going to be a trial and once Saunders is found guilty, he’s going to prison for a long time,” Ben announced, making it clear that the man’s fate would be decided by the law now.

“He deserves to be killed,” Joe rejected his father’s statement, his temper beginning to mount once again.

Dropping his hand down onto his son’s left arm, Ben forced the boy to look up at him as he addressed what he had said. “Young Man, you aren’t the judge and jury.  What’s it going to take before you realize that Joseph Cartwright doesn’t get to decide these things?” He asked, filled with frustration in his tone of voice.

Little Joe wasn’t about to back down because he didn’t see things like his father did and probably never would.  “So, he gets a few years in prison – then what, Pa?  You think that’s going to change him?  No!  He’ll probably end up killing the next man he robs and pistol whips!” Joe exclaimed, his voice rising to a fever pitch.

“Joseph – that’s enough,” His father warned.

“Yeah, Joe – ease up some,” Adam broke in only to see his brother sneering over at him.

“Who asked you to chime in?  Oh – yeah, I forgot – you go along with everything that Pa says because you are the perfect son!”

Ben tightened his hold on Joe’s arm and shook it to get his attention.  “Joseph, I didn’t bring up the trial to send you off on another tangent.  Now, either calm down or go back upstairs.”

“You know I’m getting tired of being treated like I’m a child and have to be told by both you and Adam what I’m supposed to think is right!” Joe fired back at his father.

“You’ve been acting like a child throwing tantrums and shouting instead of talking.  I’ve no earthly idea why you won’t listen to reason anymore.  Now, I’m not going to debate with you every day about this.  If you want to sit and eat and not shout, then stay and if not just let us eat our breakfast in peace.”

Little Joe stood and tossed his napkin on the table without saying another word.  He turned away from the table and walked to the stairs leaving his father and brother shaking their heads.

“I’m sorry, Pa,” Adam whispered seeing the effect that his brother was having on the man.

Ben sat there at the head of the table and dropped his head down into his hands and groaned over the behavior of his youngest son.  “I just can’t get through to that boy.  He’s never behaved like this before.  You’d think after he forced me to take him to the barn last night that he’d try to keep his opinions to himself instead of trying to rile me.”

“I wish that I could help, Pa – but Joe doesn’t have any use for me here lately.  Are you going to let him see Hoss today?”

Sighing to himself, Ben shook his head and replied, “That depends entirely on him.  I guess we’ll see how the day goes before I broach that subject with Joseph.”

*************

Little Joe had gone outside and decided to take out his anger and frustration on the wood that needed to be cut and stacked.  Both Ben and Adam had gone out to check on him to make sure that he wouldn’t do anything foolhardy like riding off into town.  By late afternoon he had a good amount of wood stacked and decided that he’d done enough.  His left arm had been throbbing, something he wasn’t about to mention to Pa the last few times he’d come out onto the porch to see what he was doing.  Joe made his way into the house and met his father standing next to the front door.

“Joseph, Hoss is awake right now.  Would you like to go and see him for a few minutes?”

*** I guess he’s going to “allow” me to see my own brother now. *** Joe mused to himself and then looked up at his father.

“Yes, Sir,” Joe nodded.

“Alright, but like I told you the other day, Hoss doesn’t know anything that has transpired between the two of us – and he knows nothing about Saunders other than that he was arrested.  So, no talking about any of that, understood?”

“Understood,” He answered quietly.  He wasn’t happy about what Pa wanted him to keep from his brother but if he was going to be allowed to see Hoss it was the only way.  He followed his father up the stairs where Pa made him stand outside of his brother’s bedroom first.

“Hoss?” Ben greeted his son as he walked over to his bed.  “There’s someone out in the hall who’d like to see you for a few minutes.”

“Little Joe?” Hoss asked hopefully as he pulled himself up against the headboard some.

“That’s right,” Ben smiled and walked to the door, waving his youngest inside the room.

“Hi, Big Brother,” Little Joe grinned and hurried to stand there next to him.  “How’re you feeling?”

“I’m fine, Short Shanks,” Hoss nodded to the boy.  “Dad gum it where’ve you been?”

Little Joe exchanged an apprehensive glance with his father and tried to figure out how he should respond to his brother’s question.  The truth of the matter was that he had just been down the hall for two days, but he hadn’t been allowed to see his brother for any length of time due to the tense situation.

Ben cleared his throat and jumped in to help assist Little Joe.  “I’ve been working your little brother quite a bit, Hoss.  But he’s come in to see you a few times when you were sleeping.”

“Go on and sit down awhile and talk to me, Little Joe,” Hoss insisted and pointed to the chair next to his bed.

Joe looked at the chair and decided that he might reveal to his brother what had happened to him the previous night if he were to try and sit down just then.

“I’d just as soon stand—been sitting too much today,” Joe lied through his teeth.  When he briefly glanced over at his father, Joe noticed that Pa had nonchalantly raised one of his hands up to his mouth covering it. It was then that Joe realized that Pa was doing his best to disguise the fact that he was grinning over the whole awkward situation regarding what had transpired in the barn the previous night.  Little Joe, himself, was not amused in the least.

“Joe, I heard from Pa that they caught Saunders,” Hoss began.  “Glad you didn’t go after him – even though I remember hearing what you said to me the other night.  It’s best this way.  If you’d gone after him, you could’ve gotten hurt.”

Little Joe’s stomach felt as though it had taken a direct punch after hearing his brother’s statement.  He wanted Hoss to know that he had tried to honor the vow that he had made but that Pa had prevented him from achieving the kill.

“Yeah—well at least he’s locked up,” Joe nodded over to Hoss.

Hoss noticed the way there seemed to be something not quite right going on between his father and little brother.  It showed in the way they kept their distance from each other there next to the bed.

“Is everything okay?” Hoss asked staring back and forth between Joe and Pa.

“Everything is fine, Son,” Ben nodded and then opened his pocket watch.  “It’s time for your pain medicine though.  Joseph, you can come back later but right now I’m going to tend to your brother.”

Biting at his bottom lip to mask his true feelings, Little Joe reached for his brother’s arm and patted it.  “I’ll be back to see you, Hoss.  You take care of yourself – you really had me worried.”

“Ah shucks, I’ll be okay, Joe.  You know I’m not gonna stay put in this bed long!” He laughed.

“See you later – feel better,” Little Joe said and turned out of the room.

“Pa?” Hoss whispered as he settled back down in bed.

Placing the medicine on the tablespoon, Ben addressed his son.  “Wait just a minute – take this.”

Hoss accepted the medicine and began once more.  “Something going on between you and Little Joe?”

Trying to feign ignorance, Ben asked, “What makes you ask that?”

“I don’t know – just something didn’t seem right.  The kid’s not in some kind of trouble, is he?”

“Now, Young Man, you stop worrying!  Everything is fine.  All we need to do is get you well again.”

Hoss studied his father’s careworn face and knew that he was keeping something from him no matter how hard he had tried to hide it.  He decided that he’d ask Little Joe the next time he stopped by.  Easing down in the bed, Hoss closed his eyes and was soon fast asleep.

*************

Little Joe hadn’t spoken more than a couple of words the rest of the day and after supper he had moved out to the front porch, leaning against one of the support columns.  Ben hadn’t seen him leaving and had gone looking for him inside the house before venturing outside where he finally spotted the boy standing there in the dark.

“Joseph?”

Turning his attention towards the voice, Joe watched as his father approached.

“I didn’t see you come out here,” he began and tried to get a look into the boy’s eyes to determine if he was still angry.  The dim light from the lantern above the door wasn’t much help and Joe had yet to say anything in response to hearing his name called.  “I need to put that medicine on your arm.”

“My arm’s fine,” Little Joe muttered and turned his face away from his father.

If it had been a typical night, Ben would have placed an arm across his son’s shoulder pulling him close as he tried to cajole Joe into letting him tend his wound.  But it was far from a typical night.  There was a big divide in their relationship, and it seemed to grow wider every hour.  If anyone had told him that his youngest would have turned away from him Ben wouldn’t have believed it.  Joseph was the most demonstrative of all three of his sons and the boy often sought out the comfort he found in his father’s arms when he was hurt.  Ben prayed that the closeness that they had shared would come back to them both, but that didn’t seem likely at that moment.

“You heard Doc Martin today.  He said I need to keep putting the medicine on your wound until he takes those stitches out.”

“You picked a fine time to be concerned about my being hurt.  You didn’t mind me getting hurt last night,” he remarked indignant over the fact that his father had taken him out to the barn and given him a tanning.

“Oh, I think you’ll live,” Ben replied drolly and watched as his son frowned and shook his head, not at all amused by what he had said.

“It might be funny to you but it’s not to me,” Joe fumed as he glared over at his father.

“I didn’t say that it was.  However, Joseph, if you’d be honest with yourself, you’ll have to admit that you more than had that tanning coming to you due to your behavior,” Ben insisted standing his ground.  “And you could’ve gotten out of it if you had just offered up an apology, Young Man,” he reminded the boy.

“Yeah, when you apologize for shooting me, I’ll apologize for everything else.”

“Getting back to that arm,” he continued, not wanting another go-round with the boy about the shooting.  “Let’s go inside and I’ll tend to it.”

“I can put medicine on my arm by myself,” Joe responded quietly.

“This isn’t about you not wanting me to tend your arm and you know it.  Okay, go ahead get it all out,” Ben sighed and shook his head.

“You made me lie to Hoss about Saunders.”

“Now, Joseph, I already explained all that to you.  Your brother doesn’t need to get upset right now and if you tell him the truth he will.”

“I made a vow to Hoss and I meant it,” Joe argued.  “Now he thinks that I didn’t try to follow through with it.”

“Your brother wouldn’t have wanted you to follow through with that vow and you know it!”

“How do you know?”

“Because I know Hoss.  He doesn’t believe in gunning down an unarmed man, unlike you,” Ben answered sadly.

“He would if it was the man who almost killed him – and who pistol whipped him!” Joe insisted vehemently.

“No, he wouldn’t.  He’s one son that I know.”

“Sure, Pa – unlike me, right?”

Ben finally settled his right hand onto the boy’s shoulder and forced him to look at him.  “Joseph, I knew you until a few days ago – until you changed.”

“I didn’t change, Pa – you did!”

“No, I didn’t.  I raised you to know right from wrong and what you tried to do was just plain wrong and deep down you know it.”

“Well, if you say I changed then you changed too!”

“Just how have I changed, Joseph?”

“I never thought you’d shoot me – and you did,” Joe spat out filled with the betrayal that he still felt over what his father had done.

“Joseph, I’d much rather see you with that wound of yours than to see you get hanged.  When I saw you cocking back the hammer of your gun, I knew that you were going to kill Saunders in cold blood.   I had no other recourse, I had to shoot you.  How many times do I have to keep telling you this before you finally understand?” Ben countered exasperatedly.

“You shouldn’t have done it,” Joe insisted irately.

“I shouldn’t have had to do it,” Ben corrected the boy.  “And if you think I wanted to hurt you you’re wrong.”

“You could’ve just shot Saunders instead of your own son!”

“It would’ve been just as wrong for me to shoot an unarmed man as it would’ve been for you to have done it.”

“So, it was okay for you to shoot me – right?”

“Yes – to save your life!”

“Don’t expect me to ever believe that Pa – because I never will.”

“Joseph -” Ben began but the boy shot past him and hurried into the house.  He stood out on the porch feeling at a loss as to what to do for his son.  Ben sighed wearily believing that he would never get his youngest to acknowledge that his father had shot him because he loved him.  Crestfallen, he walked back inside.

**************

It had taken another week and a half for Hoss to heal from his injuries.  Once Doctor Martin had informed both Ben and Roy that the young man was pretty much on the mend a trial was scheduled quickly.  During his convalescence Hoss watched the way his father and little brother acted when they were together in the same room.  Pa and Joe seemed to be at odds with each other though no harsh words were exchanged between them in front of him. Two days before the scheduled trial date, Hoss had confronted his father over what had happened those first few days after he had been shot.  Ben had gone to great lengths to tell his son everything that had happened concerning his little brother and the truth had floored the big man.  He knew that he would need to talk with Little Joe so he could try to straighten the situation out the best he could.  Hoss hated that Joe had tried to seek vengeance against Garrett Saunders to avenge him.  Like Pa had told his youngest, Hoss would never have wanted that.  Ben knew his middle boy well.

Walking out to the front porch, Hoss found Little Joe sitting at the table alone.  He ambled over to the boy and sat down alongside him.

“You were awfully quiet at dinner, Little Brother,” Hoss said and wrapped his right arm around Joe’s shoulder.  “What’re you doing out here?”

Little Joe dropped his head down to his chest and choked out, “I know that Pa told you all about it, Hoss.  I tried – really, I did!  I wanted to kill him for you.”

“Joe – why’d you think I’d want you to kill him?”

Staring back up into his brother’s eyes, Joe looked surprised by what he had said.  “He almost killed you!  And he pistol whipped you – -your face is still all bruised and cut up!”

“Nothing that won’t heal, Little Joe.”

“He deserved it!” Joe insisted.

“But Pa said he wasn’t even armed when you went to shoot him, Joe.  You know that’s wrong – don’t you?” Hoss asked, trying not to sound condescending so he would have a better chance of getting through to his brother.

“It was wrong what he did to you!”

Hoss frowned and shook his head, trying to come up with the words that would make his brother understand.  “Joe, if you shot him down in cold blood – well it’s not all that different from what he did to me, you know?”

“You didn’t deserve it – he did!” Joe argued growing angered that it seemed like his brother didn’t understand him any more than their father did.

“Nobody deserves to be gunned down, Little Brother.  I know you wuz just thinking about me—and I’m glad you care so much about me.  But I never would have wanted you to kill someone like that.  And, if you had, Pa’s right – you’d get arrested for first degree murder.  Do you think I’d want to see you get hung because you went gunning for someone just to avenge me?  Nothing is worth that to me, Joe.”

“Pa told you to say all of this, right?” Joe asked, staring suspiciously at his brother.

“No, he didn’t,” Hoss stated adamantly.  “Sure, Pa told me what happened and what he had to do to you.  But I’m telling you now how I feel about it, Little Brother.”

Little Joe dropped his head into his hands and leaned his elbows on the table.  He fought back his tears.  “I thought that at least you would understand me, Hoss,” He whispered sadly.

“I do understand, Joe, but it just wasn’t the right thing to do.  And Adam told me that you and Pa have been at odds over all this.  You’ve gotta know that Pa didn’t want to shoot you.  It killed him to do it — I know it did.  Adam said you’ve really made Pa feel bad about it too.”

“Adam would tell you that,” Joe complained.  “I guess he didn’t bother to tell you that Pa took me into the barn and gave me a tanning, did he?  Yeah, first he shot me then he did that.  I sure would like to know how that was “for my own good” like Pa said!”

“Yeah – Adam told me that too.  Joe –were you giving Pa trouble?  Is that why he took you to the barn?” Hoss questioned, forcing his brother’s gaze.

“I don’t want to talk about any of this anymore.  No one understands me around here.  I’ll be glad when the trial is over.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because then I can leave the Ponderosa.  No reason for me to stick around anymore,” Joe insisted and stood and walked away.

Ben had watched the last exchange between his two sons and witnessed Little Joe’s abrupt exit.  He moved over next to Hoss.

“It’s going to be alright, Hoss.  He just needs some time to digest what you just told him.  The boy was so sure that you’d feel the same way he did that it’s going to take him awhile to process it,” Ben tried to reassure his son, seeing that Joe’s sudden departure had worried him.

“Pa?  Did you hear Little Joe – he said after the trial he’s leaving the ranch.”

“Then I’ll just go and bring him back,” Ben reassured his son.  “Now stop worrying.  Come on inside now.  I’ve got to take you into town tomorrow to have Doc check that wound again.  And the day after that the trial begins.  You need your rest, Hoss.”

Standing from the table, Hoss shot a concerned glance out towards the barn where Little Joe had hastily headed after their discussion.  He shook his head sadly and then turned to go inside.

*************

The following day Ben and Hoss headed out in the buckboard to go and see Doctor Martin.  Worried about his middle boy, Ben had wanted him to be checked over thoroughly by Paul as the trial would begin the following day and it might prove to be a grueling one.  That left both Little Joe and Adam back at the house.  While his oldest brother worked in his father’s study preparing a list of supplies for the upcoming cattle drive, Little Joe worked on cutting more wood for the kitchen and living room.  He turned when he noticed the sheriff riding into the yard.

Roy dismounted and tied his reins up to the front hitching post.  Little Joe dropped his axe down onto the cutting block and headed across the yard to greet him.

“Hi Sheriff Coffee,” Joe sang out as he approached the man.  “My pa’s not here right now,” He explained.

“I didn’t come to talk to your pa I came to talk to you, Little Joe.  Let’s go light down into those chairs on the front porch,” He directed and motioned the boy to follow him.

Joe’s face took on a puzzled appearance as he climbed up on the porch along with the sheriff and sat down in one of the two rocking chairs there.

“What do you want?” Joe asked, trying to gauge the sheriff’s mood by his facial expression.

“I’ve got a bone to pick with you, Boy,” Roy stated bluntly.

“What for?”

“I heard tell that you’ve been giving your pa a pure fit over him shooting you.  Now, is that right?”

“I don’t want to talk about it!” Joe protested as he stood and attempted to head into the house.

Roy grabbed the boy’s arm abruptly and forced him back down into the chair.

Little Joe was taken aback by the sheriff’s sudden move, and he stared at him, confused by his actions.

“You just sit there and listen, Boy!  And don’t you get up until I’ve said my peace,” Roy warned.

Joe couldn’t believe his ears.  Roy Coffee had always been a soft spoken and considerate man but suddenly he had seemed just as angry with him as Pa had been lately.

“Yeah, I know what you’re thinking, Little Joe.  You’re sitting there wondering why old Roy isn’t acting all calm and nice like I usually do with you.  Well, Adam filled me in on what you’ve been doing to your pa and I’m gonna set you straight, Boy!”

“Adam is a big know-it-all –” Joe began but Roy cut him to the quick fast.

“You just keep that mouth of yours closed and listen.  That’s your problem, Boy – or at least one of them – you ain’t got the sense to listen!”

Joe frowned and waited not willing to get the man any more riled up than he was.  He knew that Roy was one of his father’s closest friends and evidently, he was set on yelling at him.  Little Joe didn’t have any recourse at that moment than to listen to him.

“Little Joe I’ve been a sheriff for a lot of years – long before I came to Virginia City!  And I’ve had to watch a lot of hangings as a sheriff.  None of them easy to officiate over neither!  It’s an ugly thing – a hanging!  And it’s awful having to watch a man getting the life choked out of him – and seeing his tongue sticking out of his mouth while his face turns blue and then solid black.  It’s a truly terrible way to die.  And I know that your pa has seen a hanging or two in his day as well.  Now just how do you think he’d take to seeing his youngest boy ending up swinging in the breeze after getting lynched?”

Joe started to interrupt but Roy cast a hard unyielding look at him, daring the boy to say a word.

“Well, I’ll tell you!  It would kill that man to see that happen to you!  Your pa knew that if you shot and killed an unarmed man for any reason you’d get strung up.  Ben had to make a split-second decision that day, and he did the right thing!  Your pa shot you to save you from being strung up!  And instead of being grateful to your pa you’ve been putting that man through the mill.”

“I said that I didn’t want to talk about this!” Joe yelled and stood from the chair.

Roy grabbed Joe’s shirt collar in his two hands and lifted him up to his eye level.  “That’s enough out of you, Boy!  Sit yourself down until I’m finished or I’ll take you into the barn over yonder and give you a tanning that’ll be a whole lot worse than the one your pa gave you!”

Little Joe sank back down into the chair and folded his arms across his chest to hold in his anger.  He figured that Adam had told Roy everything that had happened the last two weeks for him to have known about the tanning Pa had given him.  Joe decided that it was best for the time being to keep his thoughts to himself as the sheriff wasn’t playing around.

“Boy you need to apologize to your pa and beg him to forgive you.  You ought to get down on your knees and thank that man for loving you enough to keep you from ending up at the gallows!  And I’d have to be the one to officiate at that hanging too!  I’d sure as hell wouldn’t want any part of that.  Ben’s my best friend – I wouldn’t want to string up his youngest boy – even though he is a hothead!  Now I’ve said my peace.  Little Joe, you need to stop hurting your pa and eat some crow.  You know you done wrong – but you’re just too stubborn to admit it.  You’d best thank the Good Lord for having been given a father who loves you like Ben Cartwright.  I know he’s feeling awfully bad to have had to shoot you, Boy – and you’ve been twisting the knife in that wound just to hurt him more.  That’s all I got to say to you.  And you don’t need to tell Ben I stopped by because I came for you not him!” Roy finished speaking and walked over to the hitching post to untie his reins.  He mounted his horse and called over to the boy.  “Oh, Little Joe, you can get up now!”

Frowning, Joe watched as the sheriff rode out of the yard.  He drew in a deep breath and closed his eyes.  Roy’s words were beginning to make him think more clearly about the whole situation.  It might have been because they hadn’t come from anyone in his family, he wasn’t sure. But it was the first time in two weeks that Little Joe had even felt the slightest twinge of guilt over what he had put his father through.  He sat out on the porch a long while thinking about what the man had tried to tell him in his no-nonsense down-to-earth way.

*************

Ben had appointed one of the Cartwright’s most trusted hired hands, Fletcher Thompson, to watch over Little Joe while he and his other two sons readied to head into town for the start of the trial.  He had noticed that Joseph had been even more closed mouthed than usual that morning.  Ben stood at the credenza and helped Hoss adjust the sling that Paul had given his son to help immobilize his shoulder wound.  Adam had gone outside to hitch up the team of horses that would be pulling the buckboard into Virginia City while he would ride his horse there.

“See you in a little while, Short Shanks,” Hoss called to his little brother who had just come down the stairs.

Little Joe simply nodded his brother’s way but didn’t speak to Hoss or Pa.  He just sat down on the settee and turned his back on them as he waited for their departure.

Ben cleared his throat and advanced across to the settee.  “Joseph, Fletcher is outside and I’ve asked that he look after the place until we get home.”

“Okay,” He replied quietly never looking over at Pa.

Hoss and his father exchanged concerned glances over the way Little Joe had been acting ever since they had gotten back from town the previous afternoon.  The boy had gone totally silent for some reason, and their faces reflected the worry they felt over Joe’s somber mood.  Ben had concluded that his youngest son was either still angry over all that had happened the past two weeks or that he was thinking about how he was going to leave the ranch after the trial was over just like he had told Hoss days ago.

“Are you going to clean the tack room today?” Ben asked, not because he was concerned about the chore getting done but because he wanted to hear what the boy would say in response.

“Yes.”

Time was a luxury that Ben didn’t have at that moment or he would have attempted to talk to Little Joe more.  But Judge Wheeler was a stickler for promptness, so they needed to get into town soon.   He also knew that the prosecutor would want to speak with Hoss before having him sworn in as the sole witness to the crime.

“Well, we best be going.  I’ll see you later, Joseph,” Ben called over to the boy who had yet to look at him.

“Goodbye, Little Brother,” Hoss said as he opened the front door.

“Bye,” Joe returned, still not looking at either man.

Ben grabbed his hat and walked out next to his middle boy.  He resolved to find out what was going on with his youngest son when he returned later in the day.  From the way that Little Joe had acted, Ben presumed he was, in fact, planning to leave the ranch.

***************

“Pa?  Pa – didn’t you hear me?” Adam asked, still shaking his father’s arm.

Ben shook himself from his musings and stared over at his eldest.  “What?”

“Pa – it’s over!”

Ben stared into Adam’s eyes and wondered just how long he had been reflecting on the past two weeks.  He had heard the charges being read against Garrett Saunders and then he had been swept up in all the drama that had transpired since the day that Hoss had been shot and hadn’t paid any attention to the proceedings.

“What’s over, Son?” Ben asked, feeling very disoriented.

“Saunders – he changed his plea to guilty once he saw Hoss sitting here.  It’s over!  The judge gave him twenty years without parole!” Adam returned, very glad that there wouldn’t be a lengthy trial.  He hadn’t wanted Hoss to have to relive the terrible ordeal.

Ben looked over at Hoss, stunned by the sudden turn of events.  He witnessed his middle boy smiling over at him and read the relief there in his eyes.

“That’s wonderful,” he said and reached over to pat Hoss’ right arm.

“Yeah, I sure wasn’t looking forward to going up on that witness stand and having to stare over at that polecat,” Hoss admitted as he stood from his chair.

“Well, Boys, let’s get on home,” Ben grinned and stood also.  He then noticed Roy Coffee’s approach and held at his hand.

“Clem’s taking Saunders back to my jail for safe keeping until the wagon arrives in the morning to take him off to prison,” Roy announced and shook the hands of all three Cartwrights.

“Glad to hear it,” Ben nodded.  “Thanks, Roy.”

“Now don’t turn Little Joe loose on my town just yet, Ben.  I could use an empty jailhouse for a little while,” Roy quipped.  He wasn’t going to mention anything about his visit to the Ponderosa the previous day nor what he had said to Little Joe.

Ben shook his head and replied, “No, the boy isn’t going to leave the ranch for quite some time.  And I’m not giving his gun back to him until I know that he understands exactly how I expect it to be used.”

“Good enough,” Roy agreed.  “You three heading back now?”

Ben nodded, “Yes, it’s about time we got back to ranch business.”

“Well, I’ll see you, Ben.  Come on into town Wednesday – I’ve not beaten you at cribbage for a month – you’re due!” Roy laughed.

“Alright, you’re on.  See you then!” Ben chuckled and watched as the lawman turned and headed out of the room.

The three Cartwrights walked out of the courthouse and back to the buckboard.  Adam swung up on Sport and followed the wagon all the way back home.

**************

That evening long after supper was over and the dishes had been washed, dried, and put up, the family had sat together in the living room. Sitting there in front of the fireplace they had spent several hours discussing the upcoming cattle drive and other ranch business.  Little Joe had listened to all the plans and yet had not commented on any of them.  He had been quiet ever since he had gotten up that morning and even the announcement of what had happened at the trial hadn’t changed his demeanor.  Ben sat in his chair and tried to read what was on Little Joe’s face to determine if he was still brooding over everything that had happened to him the last two weeks.

When both his other sons had turned in for the night, Joe hadn’t followed suit but simply sat on the settee where he had been for several hours silent and unmoving.

“Isn’t it about time that you turned in, Joseph?” Ben called from his position in the red leather chair next to the fireplace.

Shaken from his thoughts, Little Joe shot a glance over at his father.  He figured that it was finally time to speak to Pa though he didn’t know quite how he would be able to get his thoughts out into words.  He stood from the settee and bit at his bottom lip before speaking.

“Pa – I’ve been thinking –” He paused trying to decide what he should say.

Ben looked up at his youngest and it was then that he noticed a bit of a change to the boy’s face.  He no longer wore the same old frown he’d had for weeks.  In fact, Little Joe looked very confused standing there and the look he wore wasn’t lost on his father.

“Yes?” Ben asked quietly.

“Well — sometimes I don’t think things through I guess,” Joe began again, still faltering on his words.

*** I don’t believe it!  The kid’s finally coming back around.  Lord knows it took him long enough.  Now – how should I handle this? *** Ben mused to himself, not wanting to give away the fact that he was both happy and a bit amused by the fact that Little Joe seemed to have realized the error of his ways and was attempting to apologize to him in a roundabout fashion.

“Yes?” Ben repeated.

Little Joe shifted his weight from one foot to the other and shrugged his shoulders.  He was beginning to realize that eating crow, as Roy had called it, was a lot tougher to do than he thought it would be.

“I – well I just wanted to say that – well – I wasn’t thinking straight, you know?”

*** This apology needs some work.  I think the boy needs some time to figure out how to do it.  Let’s just see how much Joseph really wants me to forgive him.  Afterall the kid did put me through the mill with his antics – let’s see how he likes a little taste of his own medicine – for his own good of course. *** Ben thought.  He held his right index finger up to his top lip as if he was deep in thought while planning what he’d do next.

Ben cleared his throat and stood from his chair.  “Joseph, whatever you’re trying to say can keep until tomorrow.  It’s late and I’m beat.  I’m going to bed and I suggest that you do the same,” He announced sternly.

Little Joe was surprised by his father’s abrupt statement.  He had hoped that Pa would, at the very least, hear him out.

“Yes, Sir,” he returned feeling very disheartened as he dropped his head down to his chest.  He stood there unmoving, hoping that maybe his father would relent and ask him what he was trying to tell him.

“Joseph, go on up to your room.  I’m going to put a few logs on the fire and then turn in.”

“I can do that for you, Pa,” he offered hopefully.

“No thank you, I’ve got it,” Ben insisted thereby preventing the boy from easing his conscience by trying to do a good deed.  He wanted to test the waters a bit to see just how much Joseph really wanted his forgiveness.

“Goodnight, Pa,” Joe said quietly and then, feeling dejected and filled with sorrow, he climbed the stairs.

*** Yes, that boy is going to have to earn it this time, *** Ben sighed as he watched his son slowly walk up the staircase.

************

Little Joe stood in the hallway just outside his father’s bedroom.  He hesitated and drew in another deep breath.  Twice he had lifted the knuckles of his left hand up to knock on the door and twice he had withdrawn them just as fast.  Joe wondered if he would ever have the nerve to get the words out if his father allowed him to speak to him.  Finally, he tapped on the door and waited.  A few minutes later a very tired-looking Ben Cartwright pulled his door open and stared down at his youngest son waiting out in the hall.

“It’s two in the morning – what is it, Joseph?” He asked wearily, staring down at his son.

“I’ve got something I need to tell you,” Joe paused and once more tried to figure out what he would say to the man.  There had been such bad feelings between his father and him and far too many angered words exchanged.  “Please, Pa – will you hear me out?” He asked hoping that his father still wanted to listen, though he wouldn’t have blamed him if he just pushed him away.

Ben examined Joe’s appearance and tried to determine if the boy was still wearing the typical angered look on his face like he’d been wearing for weeks.  He opened his door all the way and signaled with a quick tilt to his head for the boy to enter.  Ben crossed the floor and sank down onto the bottom of his bed.  He pulled his robe tightly across his chest to ward off the chill in the room before looking up at his son.

“Alright what is it that you want to say?” He sighed, exhausted by all the turmoil which had filled the house lately and all of it due to Joe and his inability to admit that he had been wrong.

“Pa – I – well I know that we haven’t seen eye to eye about most everything here lately,” Joe stammered as he looked down at the floor, embarrassed by his awful behavior and all that he had said to his father every day since Hoss had been shot.

“Joseph, that has to be the greatest understatement of all time,” Ben responded shaking his head.

“I know, Pa – I know.  But – I – well I got too caught up in it – and you were right about my anger and all.”

Ben didn’t respond but merely waited for his son to come out with what might be the start of an apology, but he wasn’t going to believe it until he heard it.   There was just too much bad blood between the two of them and he wasn’t going to take anything for granted until he saw proof of an act of contrition on Joseph’s part.

“Pa, I was wrong,” Joe admitted, his words coming out tasting acrid.

When his son’s eyes met his Ben glared into them and he said, “Joseph, I’d like to believe you mean that – but it’s a bit hard to swallow after all that you’ve said to me lately.” Pa realized that he might be playing with fire, but he had to make sure that the boy wouldn’t change his mind, and hurtful words would be exchanged between them once again.

“I know, Pa – I hurt you – I said such awful things.  I’m ashamed of myself – and I just can’t explain it away.”

“So – are you admitting to me that you were wrong for what you’ve said to me or are you apologizing because you know that trying to shoot an unarmed man was wrong?”

Joe chewed at his bottom lip and then answered, “Both, Pa.  I had no right to talk to you like I did and I was wrong to try and gun Saunders down in cold blood.  And – I didn’t give you any other choice – you had to stop me for my own sake not his.”

Ben shook his head partly annoyed over how long it had taken the boy to realize why he had shot him and partly relieved over the fact that he had realized it at all.

“Alright, Joseph,” Ben nodded and stood from his bed.  “You’ve had your say.  It’s late go on to bed.”  Ben motioned the boy to the door and opened it.  ***Let’s see how well he takes my not letting him off the hook this time.  This is wearing me out! *** he thought and tried to maintain his aloofness.

“Pa?” Joe asked looking up into his father’s eyes.  He stood there just outside the doorway feeling as though he really hadn’t gotten through to his father at all, or if he had, that Pa hadn’t responded like he had hoped that he would.  Joe figured that he was now getting the cold shoulder from Pa as a form of punishment for the awful way that he had acted.  “Pa – will you – will you forgive me?” Little Joe’s voice shook with his question.

“I’ll talk to you about that later.  Go on to bed,” Ben replied stringently and closed his bedroom door.

Little Joe felt like his father had shut him out of his room and his heart.  Crestfallen and filled with remorse he slowly walked across the hall returning to his own bedroom.  He felt terrible for all that he had put his father through and how it had been his own fault that their relationship was now strained and perhaps always would be.  Joe pulled off his robe and climbed into his bed praying for a sleep that just wouldn’t come.

*************

Little Joe wasn’t certain just how long it had been since he had tried to talk to Pa.  It might have been an hour, or it might have been several when he thought that he had heard a sound at his door.  Staring across the room he noticed the thin shaft of light that entered along with his father.  Joe sat up and swung his legs over the side of his bed as Pa quietly made his way across the room.  He eased down on the bed next to the boy trying to gather his thoughts.  Neither of them spoke for a long while until Ben finally broke the burgeoning silence.

“I couldn’t go back to sleep,” He whispered.

“I’m sorry I woke you, Pa.  I should have waited until morning,” Little Joe apologized.  Feeling guilty for having awakened his father, he dropped his head down to his chest and waited for him to continue.

Placing his hand on his son’s shoulder he redirected his gaze so he could see into the boy’s troubled eyes.  “Is the hate and the anger finally gone, Joseph?”

Joe nodded solemnly.  “Yes, Sir – it’s gone.  And – I had no business talking to you the way that I did.  I don’t know why—but I just couldn’t let go of all that happened between us, Pa.  I wish that I could take it all back – but I can’t and I know it.  All I can do is tell you how sorry I am for everything that I said and for everything that I did.”

“Now do you finally understand exactly why I shot you?” Ben asked, gently placing the palm of his right hand on his son’s face.

Little Joe had to brush aside the sudden appearance of tears as they slid down his cheeks.  “I know it now, Pa.  I know that you shot me because you loved me.”

Ben sighed wearily, so relieved that his son had finally understood.  He reached for Joseph and did what he had wanted to do for days.  Wrapping his arms around him, he pulled the boy to his chest.  Pa was back in the role of both parents again with the gentleness the boy needed along with the firm hand to guide him and sometimes correct him.  “You darn fool kid.  It sure took you long enough!  How many times did I tell you that?” He admonished the boy though his voice broke and tears stung at the corners of his eyes. Ben said a silent prayer of thanksgiving as he kept Little Joe locked inside his loving embrace.

“I know, Pa, you tried to tell me over and over again, but I just wasn’t listening,” Joe cried, “I’m so sorry.”

Ben ran his fingers through the thick brown curls on Little Joe’s head, finally dropping his chin to rest there.  He shook his head, wondering if the boy would ever realize just how much his father loved him.  Hopefully, in time he would, since their strong bond was still there, just as intact as it had always been.  And the love that they shared had survived all the terrible turmoil of the past two weeks.

“Do you think you’ll ever be able to forgive me, Pa?  I know that I put you through a lot of grief, so it’s probably going to take a long while.  But – if I show you just how sorry I really am – maybe eventually you will,” Joe choked out.  Though he felt content and secure, held there in his father’s arms, he still needed the forgiveness that only his pa could give him.

“Oh, Joseph,” Ben whispered.  Pushing aside the boy’s fallen bangs he leaned forward and softly pressed his lips to Little Joe’s forehead.  “I forgave you long before you asked me.”

Little Joe closed his eyes, allowing himself to feel the love that his father had always offered him freely.  He had missed his pa and the million and one things that he had always done for him to make him feel better about himself.  Without his father Little Joe had felt lost, alone and empty inside.  He wished that he had tried harder to listen to what Pa had tried to tell him for weeks. Little Joe finally realized that he wouldn’t have had to suffer through two weeks of feeling like he’d never have his father’s love or respect again if he hadn’t let himself be controlled by his anger.  Now, held in his father’s arms, he was relieved that Pa had forgiven him, even though he wouldn’t have blamed the man if he hadn’t.

Little Joe rested his head on his father’s shoulder and whispered, “Thanks, Pa,”

Ben smiled as he combed his fingers through the boy’s hair.  *** Darn fool kid, I hope I never have to shoot you again! *** He shook his head and wiped the tears from his eyes.

**************

Epilogue

The ranch slowly went back to normal as did the Cartwright family, though it had been a rough couple of weeks.  In a month’s span of time Hoss had completely healed and was already back at work helping his brothers get ready for the summer cattle drive.  Little Joe had gone back to his former self, and everyone was happy to see him smile again.  The closeness he had shared with his father had come back as well and he had learned a valuable lesson in forgiveness.  After he had asked his father to forgive him, Pa had let him know that Joe next had to forgive himself and move on.  It took a while, but he did just that.

Little Joe had been dispatched to Virginia City to pick up the mail and a few supplies and when he had returned, he noticed Roy Coffee’s horse at the front hitching post.  He left the buckboard and the supplies and hurried into the house.  Little Joe had something he needed to do.

“Sherrif Coffee,” Joe called across the room as he entered the house.

Roy stood from the settee after hearing his name.  He smiled at the boy as he walked over to him.

“Howdy, Little Joe,” he nodded to the boy.

Little Joe held out his hand to the sheriff and Roy shook it.  “I just wanted to thank you, Sheriff.  You were right to fuss at me like you did.  I appreciate you setting me straight about what I had been putting my pa through.  I was the one in the wrong, but I couldn’t see it until you gave me that very stern talking to.”

Roy smiled at the boy and nodded, “Guess you ate a little crow, huh, Joe?”

“Yes, Sir – I sure did.”

“That’s good – glad to hear it.”

“And – you were right about my pa.  I’m awfully lucky to have a man like Ben Cartwright for a father.  If I grow up to be one tenth of the man that he is – well, I’ll be a very good man!”

“Oh, you’ll get there,” Came Pa’s voice.

Little Joe spun around to see his father standing behind him smiling.

“Oh – how long have you been listening, Pa?” Little Joe asked, worried that his father would now know why he had finally apologized to him.  He didn’t want Pa to know that it had taken Roy Coffee to show him the error of his ways by scaring him half to death.  Little Joe had learned more about hangings than he ever wanted to know.

Ben winked over at Roy and draped an arm around his son’s shoulder, pulling him close.  “Just long enough to hear what a wonderful father I am.”

“Now you done it, Little Joe!” Roy exclaimed.  “There won’t be any living with that pa of yours now that he thinks you like him.”

Joe nodded over at Roy and then looked up at his father and grinned, “It’s okay, Sheriff Coffee, I think Pa already knew that.”

“I know one thing, Young Man,” Ben returned trying to appear stern but failing miserably.  He was just so relieved that he and his son had repaired their relationship, and it showed all over his face.   “Joseph, you’ve got supplies to take out to your brothers.”

“Yes, Sir, I just came in to say hi to the sheriff.  I’m going out to the camp next.”

“Ben – Joe I gotta be going,” Roy announced and turned for the door.

Ben followed the lawman and shook his hand as he opened the door.  “See you in town in a day or two, Roy.  Thank you for everything,” he nodded to the man, knowing that Roy had helped Little Joe admit that he had been in the wrong and thus he had helped him mend his relationship with his son.

“Expect to lose at cribbage, Ben,” Roy winked at his friend and walked outside.

“Well, I guess I’d better get going too, Pa,” Joe said and started for the door.

“Just a minute, Joseph.  Come over to my study I need to have a word with you,” he stated cryptically and walked over to his desk.

“Hope I’m not in trouble,” Joe muttered to himself.

Ben sat down at his desk and looked up at his son, whose facial expression looked a bit worried.

“Relax, I’m not going to get after you.  I just wanted to give you something, Joseph,” he said and opened his desk drawer.

Little Joe watched as his father pulled out his holster and Colt revolver.  He had wondered when or if he was going to get the gun back but hadn’t wanted to ask due to everything that had happened a few weeks ago.

“I think it’s time that I return this to you.  But I just wanted to remind you about something important that I told you about wearing this gun.  Do you remember, Joseph?”

Biting his bottom lip, Little Joe nodded solemnly.  It had been quite a while since he had thought about what his father had said to him the day that he had been given the holster and Colt as a gift.

“You told me that carrying a revolver might make you think that you’re a man, but it means nothing if you don’t control the person behind the gun,” Joe recited verbatim what his father had told him.

“Here,” Ben nodded as he handed his son the gun and holster.  “I need you to think on that, Joseph.”

“I will, Pa – and I haven’t forgotten all that happened between us either.  I don’t ever want to let you down like that again,” Joe returned contritely.

Ben smiled proudly and reached across the desk and patted the boy’s arm.  “I trust you, Joseph.  Now you go on and take those supplies to your brothers.”

Little Joe strapped on his holster and settled the Colt inside.  Looking over at his father he smiled and said, “Thanks, Pa.”

“Get to work,” Ben insisted feigning sternness in his tone of voice, but his eyes couldn’t disguise the love that he had for the boy.

“Yes, Sir,” Joe grinned and then offered his father one last meaningful gaze along with a nod.  He turned and hurried outside to finish his assignment.

“Well, Joseph, I’m glad that you finally came back to me.  It was a rough gale – but you and I got through it.  And I have a feeling that you’ll end up being much more than a tenth of the man that your father is!”  Ben grinned and shook his head.

***You’re the one who held me up, never let me fall.  You’re the one who saw me through, through it all. — I’m everything I am, because you loved me. ***

The End

Written by Wrangler

5-8-2026

(Dedicated to my story consultant Rob who insisted Joe should have ten smacks and not eight, forcing a rewrite. Little Joe was not happy.)