She’ll always be there , like the stars… (by mumu74)

A prequel

Rating K, (1,050 words)

She’ll always be there , like the stars… 

 

« We need a carrot for the nose and stones for the eyes » added Ben, by putting snow on the head of the big snowman he was doing with his son. Five years old Hoss was waiting for instructions. Pa  knew everything, he knew how to do perfectly snowmen.

It was sunday afternoon and Hoss enjoyed each moments with his father. Between school and hard job, there was not much time rest for playing and being with him.

« Hoss, do you like the snowman ? pa asked to his son.

-Yeah, exactly the same like you.. Same dark eyes. But I prefer to see those eyes on the snowman, I know,  I’m not in big touable… »

Ben laughed and finished the snowman by puting the carrot in the middle of the face. Then he added the pipe he had taken close to the fireplace.

« Oh Pa , that’s great. »

-yes, but now, we have to go home ; It’s late. Hop sing said, we have to be home before dark comes. Remember ?

Hoss nodded and they walked towards the big house.

« Pa, why Hop Sing is at home now ?

-Remember what I say, when he came ? I met him in town and he offered his help.

-He is kind. He gives me cookies. I love him very much.

-Son, you have lovely feelings toward him. And I’m very proud of you. »

Hoss walked in the snow, he held his father’s hand. His pa had a so big hand. Joe looked at his tiny hand, lost in the very very large hand of his father.

« Pa, why your hand are so big ?

– So that I can do hard job and so that I can hug you and give you love.

« Hey Pa, do we have brother or sister there, » he asks by showing the moon ?

-I don’t know.  Ben was amused by the question. He didn’t know what to answer, because he didn’t know, what his son wanted to know.

-But sure, look, pa there’s light. And that light, is mama’s light, isn’t it, pa ?

-Oh yes, son . It’s her light above our head, sending us love and protection.

-Pa, what is a refuge ?

-Mh, you ask, son ?  Sorry I didn’t hear you.

-what is a refuge. Adam said, I have to take refuge in Ma’s memories.

-that means, when you’re sad, when you miss Ma, think about her. Think about her face, think about the love she had for you. And that’ll help you to feel better.

-Pa, is it what you do ?

-Yes, I close my eyes and I cherish the memories of her. And then I watch you and Adam, and I feel better. After all you’re the most lovely gift she let me, and I feel the same about Adam.

-So ma’s refuge is this star ?

-yes son , replied Ben with tears in the eyes. In the silence of the night, Ma’s star would always be there, whispering sweet words for you.

-do you miss her, pa ?

-yes. I miss your ma, I miss Adams mother.

-How was ma ?

-she was lovely, and kind , and patient. I’ve never seen her being upset or angry at anybody. She had a lovely smile. She had wonderful blue eyes, and you know why, when I look at you, I see the portrait of your mother. You have her blue eyes and that kindness in the glance , the same she had.

-Is it true, pa ? »

Ben didn’t  answer, he just nodded and put his hand around Hoss shoulders. They hurried up towards the warm house. Hop Sing was waiting for them with supper, he brought bread and water but Ben asked for a glass of wine.

« Hop Sing, where is Adam ?

-Your son left the yard, he told me.

-That’s good, Hop Sing. But he should be home now. »

Just as he was saying that, Adam opened the door. He put his hat on the credenza.

« I’m sorry Pa, I lost sense of time. I was working with Brooke. We have to write a referat about history.

-No harm, son. Apologize accepted. Go on wash your hands. We eat now.

-Yes sir. »

*****************later
I’ll tell a story , son . Wait for me. Ben delivered happy dreams each night, at this moment his powerful voice became sweet and low.

« It was once uppon a time ……. »

Ben read the words from the book, the story of a Teddy Bear wishing to have a friend for Christmas. Hoss was quiet, looked at his father , Hoss enjoyed each word. He pictured perfectly the scene. His father read it so good.  But there were some moments that Hoss didn’t understand. So he asked.

« Pa, why the Teddy Bear refuses to be friend with the snowman ?

-because the snowman is too cold, he doesn’t like him., Ben explained.

-I like snow, it’s like a big mantel. It’s so silent, all is white, everything is different.

-yes son, snow erase everything, the tree, the stones. »

**********
Ben just left the bedroom after having kissed Hoss. The young boy waited and stood up, as slow as he could . He put his hand in his pants pocket and took something. He had a little angel in his hand. Silently he went to the window and looked at the stars in the sky

« Ma, look at me. I’m a big boy now. I can do a lot alone, almost. Look at what I did with Adams help. I curved an angel. I’ll give it to pa. I’m glad, you shine in the sky above my head. So I’m not afraid being alone in my bed.  I know, you’re here. I wish, I could hear your voice, Pa said, you had a beautiful voice. I’m sure, you had a lovely one.

**********************************************************************

Just as he finished the last sentence, Hoss knew , it would maybe sound strange, but he has decided to write his memories. He didn’t know if he would have a long life, so he really wanted to keep memories of his past, in case of he wouldn’t be able to tell his story to his children. And telling about the little boy he was and the father he had , that was very important.

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Author: mumu74

I live in France. I'm a teacher. I'm a recent Bonanza Fan, but not a recent writer. I always used to write so I keep writing. And now Bonanza is part of my inspiration. I love writing prequels, trying to imagine how Ben Cartwright could raise young children, after so much pain and tragedy. I work now with an english friend who help me for translating. I read many fanfiction, and my english is improving. I hope, you'll have fun reading my imaginary world. Thanks for future visits and reviews.

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