Summary: Joe gets down on himself after the whole town turns against him. Can Candy help?

WARNING! Rape mentioned. Not of a main character, but it is still a part of the story, so I’ve warninged and age-gated it.

Rating: M
Word count: 11,056

---

Joe sat watching the world pass by. They had half the day left on the stage still and he debated just sleeping the rest of the way. He wasn’t particularly looking forward to getting back to Virginia City. As soon as he was back, he knew his problems would start again. Joe glanced over at the other man with him and wondered if he should bring it up to Candy, but decided against it. He wouldn’t care. And even if he did, what could he do about it? He pulled his hat down over his eyes and attempted to catch some shut-eye.

*****

Sure enough, as soon as they alit from the stage in town, Joe heard the whispers start. Oh sure, maybe they weren’t actually being said by the good people of Virginia City, but he was sure they were all thinking it just the same. It didn’t matter that Joe had been proven innocent. No one cared that the person who had first brought the charges against him had admitted that she lied. By the time the charges were dropped and he was released to freedom, all anyone was convinced of was that Joe had taken advantage of Victoria Sykes, robbed her family and killed one of their horses in the get-away. 

Candy watched his friend walk quickly from the stage station to the livery stable where Hoss had promised to leave their horses. He shook his head when Joe avoided the gaze of anyone who walked past, whether it was friendly or condemning. They’d been gone for nearly two weeks, and in that time, Joe had been nearly back to his normal self. But as they had grown closer and closer to town, he watched the other man’s mood gradually sink back to the morose spirits he had been in before heading out. He’d heard the whispers, of course he had. There were some in town that thought that even though Joe had been pronounced innocent, that he had threatened the girl again to change her story. There were others who figured he had bribed his way out. And then there were the few who spoke the least, but were heard the loudest. They were the ones who accepted that he was in fact innocent in this, but was sure to have committed the same crimes before on other occasions. 

Those were the ones that bothered Joe the most. He’d always been well-liked in town. Of course there had been times where he found himself in the middle of confrontations, or the occasional scuffle, but he had never raised a hand if it wasn’t in self-defense, and certainly he never in his life harmed any woman the way they were claiming. It had been a month, and Candy had watched Joe slowly withdraw into himself, slowly avoiding more and more people and refusing to participate in town events. Finally he’d had enough and dragged Joe along with him for two weeks out of the area. He had hoped to bring Joe back his normal fiery spirit and love of life. And until they were nearly back to Virginia City, he thought he had been successful. But once they got within fifteen miles of town, Candy had watched Joe’s eyes darken and his whole aura cloud over. He shook his head again and followed Joe to the livery. 

As they rode out of town, Candy turned at a shout of his name. Joe pulled rein but didn’t turn. Candy looked around for the person who had hailed him and raised an eyebrow when he recognized the person, but couldn’t recall the name. He crossed his arms and leaned on his saddle horn as he waited for the man to cross the street to them. 

“It is Canaday, isn’t it?” 

“Friend, for the life of me, I can’t recall where I know you from.”

The man ignored his statement and instead countered with “What’s a stand up man like you hanging around with a deadbeat like Cartwright here?” As he tipped his hat back, the sun glanced off a metal decoration that hung from the band and his face was no longer obscured by the brim. Candy half-grinned and exhaled quickly when he realized how he knew this man. They’d ridden together years ago when Candy was scouting for the army. His name was Howard, but he’d always gone by the moniker Calico because of his heterochromatic eyes. His right was sky blue, but the left was a light brown.

“Well if it isn’t Calico. I haven’t seen you for, what six years? What are you doing around here?”

Calico glossed over Candy’s question and repeated his own instead. “Just passing through, gonna get a job up at one of the silver mines, but I’ve been here long enough to hear the local chatter. Never thought you’d be hanging with someone who’d do something like that.”

Joe pulled his hat down lower over his eyes and his hands tightened on his reins, but he didn’t take the bait. Candy glanced over at him quickly before turning back to the man interrogating them. “Now, if you heard the rumors, you’ve also heard that he was not only proven innocent, but she admitted that she had misidentified him and recanted her accusations.”

“Well you and I both know that someone who-”

“Calico, I’m gonna stop you right there. Joe’s a friend of mine. And more than that, I’m in his family’s employ. Now, if you don’t mind…” He nudged his bay and the horse moved forward. Joe took the unsaid hint and started his pinto moving as well. Neither man looked back as they rode out of town.

*****

“You’re gonna ruin your reputation if you keep hanging out with me.”

“Well, I can’t say that’s a problem. I don’t have much of a reputation to begin with.” He grinned at Joe, but only got a grave look in return. 

“Candy, I’m serious. It’s only a matter of time before something happens and I don’t want you caught up in all this.” He sighed. “Just… I’m gonna be up at the logging camps for awhile anyway, so I suppose it doesn’t matter.”

“Don’t tell me you’re gonna skip the Founder’s Day celebrations next week?”

“I don’t wanna be there, and no one else wants me there. I think it’s better all around.”

“Joe, you’ve got friends. You can’t let a few bad eggs spoil the entire batch.”

“Now you’re sounding like Hoss. What is with you two and positivity? Sometimes a man just wants to be moody. I’ll see you.” He tossed his napkin down and left the breakfast table. He wasn’t really going to be at the logging camps, not exactly. He was actually going to be marking trees in the next section before the camp moved. And hopefully he wouldn’t be seeing another human for the next two weeks at least. The words around town were really getting to him. Joe had always had relatively high self-esteem, but now he had started to wonder if that was only because he was feeding off what the rest of town thought about him. And now that he had fallen out of good graces, he was starting to believe that maybe he was everything that they were saying about him. Sure, he had enough in the way of ethics that he would never even think of touching a woman like Victoria had originally claimed. But the rest… He was kinda selfish, he supposed. And he certainly had a way of drawing trouble to those around himself. Not to mention how he seemed to mess up nearly everything he touched. 

Joe rode to the new area of trees to be marked and gradually faded deeper and deeper into a pit of self-hatred. He must be as villainous as the people in town thought. Why else would they have been so easily swayed by the lies Victoria had told? They hadn’t even waited to hear his side of things before jumping on the Hate Joe Bandwagon. In fact, if Hoss and Candy hadn’t been with him when the deputy came out to arrest him, he doubted if he would even have made it to town alive that night. The deputy had come out on a Sunday evening. Joe had been so shocked by the allegations that he simply agreed without a fight and gone to saddle his horse. Hoss had demanded the deputy show him the warrant and Candy had followed Joe to saddle up both Chub and Eli. Turns out it was a good thing they had given the deputy no choice before accompanying them because just as they made it to the edge of the Ponderosa, a group of five men came out of the rocks lining the trail and “escorted” them to town. Candy and Hoss exchanged a look when they passed a large tree with a rope hanging from it. Joe pretended not to see it.

He had spent six nights in the Virginia City jail before Victoria had come to admit that he wasn’t the man who had done it. Within those six nights, though, he had been subjected to quite a few less than desirable actions. The lady who worked at the diner and always brought prisoners their meals had taken an instant dislike to him. The stew the first two nights had been made with spoiled meat. Joe had wrinkled his nose at the smell and glanced up at the deputy. The man didn’t seem to care and had just laughed at him before shoving the ruined meal through the slats and walking away. The third day he hadn’t gotten any food at all. The fourth and fifth days it was a 10 year old kid who had delivered the food. Joe only could guess that the normal diner had started refusing anything at all. But the quality was hardly better. Moldy bread and crusty beans. He had a consistent headache by the last day from not having been able to eat any of the food without getting sick. Luckily the deputy had kept him in supply of water. 

On the last day, Roy Coffee had returned and Victoria had come to recant her statement. Roy had been so upset with the condition that he found Joe in that he told the deputy to get out and not show his face again for at least a week. Joe had been relieved to be released, but the damage had been done. He figured that if the whole town saw him as such a miscreant, then he must be one. At least to some extent. Once again, Candy and Hoss had ridden with him. Neither of them had visited him at all while he had been locked up, and Joe wondered if Hoss had been denied entry to see him or had simply not wanted to. He decided not to ask. He didn’t want to hear his brother confirm that Joe wasn’t worth his time anymore. Neither of them so much as looked at him as they rode back to the Ponderosa, although they did exchange a number of looks between themselves. In fact, they each did try to catch his eye, but he was so upset with his ongoing ordeal and so convinced that they agreed with all the townsfolk, that he simply didn’t notice. 

The next few days after his release, Joe had kept to himself, hardly speaking a word and avoiding everyone. After getting some of the fence repairs done, some of the ranch hands had approached him to ask what had happened. At least they asked for his side of things before jumping to any conclusions, but Joe could see in their eyes that they didn’t fully believe him. So he’d left for a few days. He’d gone into the high country and come back with a bighorn. Candy had taken pity on him after that and assigned all the hands to other tasks, leaving himself to work with Joe. But the youngest Cartwright’s mood continued to decline. The more time that passed, the deeper he fell into self doubt and self-loathing. Finally, Candy couldn’t stand it anymore and hardly gave Joe a choice before taking two weeks away from the ranch.

They had spent the time up in Reno where no one had gotten wind of the scandal. Joe gradually started to lighten up. His eyes brightened and he started eating normally again. Unfortunately, all that had disappeared again upon their return to Virginia City. Now Joe was heading off on his own again, worried that he was going to pull Candy down with him. He missed the worried look the other man gave him as he rode off to the timber camp. Candy didn’t worry about his own reputation. He worried that Joe was going to fall deeper into despair and one of these days not be able to return from it.

***** CHAPTER 2

Joe had made it to the area needing timber to be marked and set up his camp. He hobbled Cochise and built a small fire. The next few days looked to be nice weather and he didn’t worry about being rained on. He sat staring into the flames as they danced and flickered, coffee forgotten in a tin cup by his side. He kept going over everything in his mind, wondering where he had gone wrong. 

He sighed again, the sound ending halfway between a moan and a whine. He just wished someone cared. That he had someone to talk to. But he couldn’t go to Hoss with this. He held his older brother in such high esteem that he simply wouldn’t be able to stand it if Hoss agreed in any way with his dark thoughts. Candy didn’t deserve to be harnessed with this. He had already done his time with Joe’s moodiness when they went to Reno. His pa was normally someone he turned to, but at some point, he would disappoint Ben with all his shortcomings, and he wasn’t ready for that to happen yet. Maybe his friend Rex? No. He had his own problems going on. Corbin then. Joe shook his head at himself. No, not Corbin either. He’d be more likely just to pile on and make Joe admit that he deserved how everyone in town was treating him. 

He thought next about his good friend Sarah. He had stood by her many years ago when she went through some tough times. Maybe she would be willing to listen to him now. But no. She probably wouldn’t even trust him enough now to let him get within 50 feet of her anymore. He couldn’t blame her. So maybe he could go spend a day with Jason and Rachel. If both of them were there, Rachel wouldn’t have to be afraid of him. But they had two kids, five and seven years old. And he was a screw up. They wouldn’t want him around their family.

So he was alone. Maybe he should just leave, make a fresh start somewhere. His gaze drifted to his gun belt that he had draped over the saddle he was leaning against. Maybe he should just finish it now. He contemplated that for a bit. It would solve everything. No one would have to be afraid of him. Everyone who he caused problems for wouldn’t be impacted by his failings in the future. He wouldn’t have to face everything being said by the town folk, and he wouldn’t have to listen to everything coming from his own brain. As he sat and thought about it, the more sense it seemed to make. If he wasn’t around anymore, he wouldn’t hurt anyone anymore. And he had told Candy he was going to the logging camps, so no one actually knew where he was. He’d be long gone by the time anyone found him. He’d probably be buzzard food. He’d have to unhobble Cochise first, make sure the horse could move freely. 

Joe stood to take the hobble off Cochise’s pastern. The horse raised his head from where he was grazing and nickered softly. He flipped his tail and turned to face his human when Joe walked over to him. Joe ran his hand through the pinto’s flowing mane and the horse shoved his face into Joe’s chest. He removed the soft pliant leather and gave Cochise a slap on the rump. The horse snorted and moved off into the trees. Joe sighed again when his horse left and turned back to his meager camp. He sat back down and looked again at his gun belt. This was the right decision. He wouldn’t be missed. If anything, everyone who knew him would be relieved. Happy even. He reached to draw the weapon but stopped when he heard hoofbeats coming his way.

“You dumb horse, why did you come back?” Cochise made his way over to Joe and reached down to snuffle his soft muzzle in Joe’s curls. He nibbled gently on Joe’s hair and nickered again quietly. Joe reached up and stroked the short hair on the horse’s forehead and smiled slightly. Cochise dipped his head down further and bumped against the gun belt. Twice he nudged the weapon until he moved it enough to fall to the ground from where Joe had it hung. The horse seemed to look askance at his human then pawed at the ground. He caught the butt of the gun and ground it into the dirt. 

“I can’t tell if yer tryin’ ta tell me something, or if you just want attention.” Joe decided it didn’t matter what the answer was. Maybe humans didn’t want him around. Maybe he didn’t deserve to have any friends. But his horse wanted him. Had chosen him. First before Joe ever had broken him, and now again tonight. He gave a real smile this time, small as it was, and pulled the pinto’s cheek close to give him a kiss. 

“Alright, Cooch. You’re all the reason I need to stick around.” Joe decided that if Cochise wanted to keep him, maybe he had some redeeming quality, even if he couldn’t see it at the moment. He wiped a stray tear away and huffed a small laugh. Yeah, he needed help. He needed to tell someone, before he did something he might regret. He poured the rest of his coffee over the fire and lifted the saddle onto his horse. “Come on, let’s go home.”

***** CHAPTER 3

It was well past midnight when Joe pulled into the yard, closer to dawn really. He led Cochise into the barn and quietly let himself into the house. There he paused. He had made the decision to talk to someone about what was going on in his head, but who? And by the time the sun rose, he’d probably lose his nerve anyway. He walked slowly up the stairs and hesitated again. He might be a disappointment to his older brother, but Hoss had always been there for him, Joe was sure he’d accept discussing this as well. His hand on Hoss’s door, he lost his nerve and instead sat down in the hall and leaned back against the wall.

He felt… heavy. Like there was just too much of life pressing down on him from all sides. It was suffocating, but he simply couldn’t find the energy or the motivation to do anything about it. So he sat there in the dark hallway and gave up. He closed his eyes and kept them that way even when he heard a sound from Candy’s room. Sure enough a few minutes later, the tall man emerged from his door and moved to go downstairs. Candy was almost always the first one up in the morning and often had an hour or more before anyone else joined him. He startled and did a double take when he saw Joe sitting in the hallway.

“Joe?”

“Hmm.”

“What are you doing here?”

“At home or in the hallway specifically?”

“Either one. We weren’t expecting you for nearly two weeks. And you passed your own room?” He held a hand down and waited for Joe to take it before hauling the other man to his feet. “Come on. Let’s go downstairs.” Joe went willingly and without a fight. When they got down to the main room, he dropped down despondently onto the settee. 

“Candy…” Joe leaned forward with both elbows on his knees and ran his hands through his hair. The other man had lit a lamp and brought it over to place it on the table. Joe looked awful. His cheekbones were more prominent since his eating habits had gone downhill and his eyes reflected back the lamp, but seemed to have no light of their own. The shadows in the room drew everything out even more, and his whole being had an aire of dejection. Candy sat on the table in front of the other man and waited for him to speak. He couldn’t remember ever seeing his friend so miserable and his heart clenched at the sheer anguish that seemed to radiate from him.

“I need you to promise me you won’t tell anyone else any of this.”

“Joe… I can’t… I mean, if the law should get involved, I won’t obstruct that…”

“No, it’s nothing like that. Nothing illegal. Just nothing I want spread around.”

“Okay.”

Joe nodded back and took a deep breath. He chewed the corner of his lower lip and opened his mouth to talk just to close it again. “I’m sorry, Candy. I can’t.” He shut his eyes and shook his head. He wanted to tell someone so much. He needed someone to know. Just having someone to talk to about it … but for some reason, just couldn’t bring himself to do it.

“Come on Joe, it can’t be all that bad. What did you almost kill someone or something?” 

He meant it as a joke, knowing that the other man would turn himself into the law in a heartbeat if that were the case, but his smile fell as Joe dropped his hands and looked Candy dead in the eye. 

“Joe… what happened? Who…?”

“… myself…” The single word, uttered on a whisper, seemed to be as loud as gunfire in the quiet predawn hour. 

“What!? Why would you do something like that?”

Joe stood and paced the room. This was a mistake. He never should have said anything. “I thought it was for the best. Think about it, Candy. I’m worthless. I’m a waste of space and a sorry excuse for a human being. If I took myself out, no one would be worried about their wives or daughters. You and my family wouldn’t be constantly looked down on for supporting me. And anyone who-” 

He was cut off as Candy snagged both his upper arms and forced Joe to face him. “What did you try.” It wasn’t a question. He needed to know immediately if Joe had taken anything. But Joe just shook his head again. “Joe. Tell me. What. You. Took.”

“I didn’t take anything Candy! I was going to shoot myself!” The two men stared at each other in shock. Joe from having said it so bluntly and Candy from hearing his friend outright admit that he had nearly ended his own life. “I had let Cochise loose and was sitting in front of the fire just looking at that revolver. It seemed like… I thought it was the right choice.”

“What stopped you?” Candy felt his blood run cold at how close Joe had been to committing suicide. He had known Joe hadn’t been in a healthy headspace when he left that day, and he had let him ride off alone anyway, but he hadn’t thought that Joe would try something as permanent as that.

Joe laughed. A short, sharp, sudden sound that seemed out of place in the conversation. “What stopped me? My horse. He came back and knocked the gun down. And shoved himself into me.” Joe laughed again. “Can you believe that? The only creature on the planet that cared was a horse.” He shook his head again. “So I figured that was enough of a reason to not do anything, and came back here. I was gonna talk to Hoss, but looks like you drew the short straw instead.”

“I’m glad you came back instead. Joe, we want you here. You know that.” Joe looked away and tried to avoid rolling his eyes. He knew that Candy was just trying to make him feel better, but there was no way they actually wanted to keep him around. Joe didn’t even want to keep himself around. Why would anyone else? 

Their conversation was halted when the sound of dishes clanging in the kitchen and footsteps on the stairs heralded the approach of the others in the house. Candy gave Joe a look that promised they would continue this talk later, but he kept his word and didn’t mention anything to the other men in the house. He did however mentally change up his plans for the next week. He’d have to reassign some of the hands to different tasks so that he freed himself up to partner with Joe. He wasn’t planning on letting the other man out of his sight. In fact, he was debating confiscating both Joe’s sidearm and his rifle. 

He spoke again with Hoss and Ben descended the stairs and he saw they were surprised that Joe was in the house. “I can get some in town and then ride up with you, Joe.”

“Get some what? Weren’t you gonna be up at the logging camp for two weeks, little brother?”

“Joe said the chains they were using to haul out some of the larger trees broke, so he came back down to get some. Figured since he was back, I’d ride up with him, for a few days at least.”

“That works, where are the men on the fencing project?” Ben inquired. They had been moving two entire sections of fence because of changes in the route of a river. 

“Almost done with the second section. They don’t need me there anymore.”

Ben nodded. “I’ll be gone for a few days going to Genoa. Hoss, did you still want to come and take a look at their stock down there with me?”

“Yeah, Pa. Sounds like they’ve got a few real nice options down there. When are ya leaving?”

“Right after breakfast. I think we can leave Joe and Candy here in charge of the place for a few days anyway.”

“See ya when you get back.” Joe made his escape without making eye contact with anyone and left to the solace of the barn. He saddled both Buck and Chub and led them to the hitching post before retreating to the barn again. He sighed and climbed to the hayloft to toss some fresh hay down. Glancing out the window, he saw both his brother and father leave for Genoa. He sat down and thought about what Candy had said to the others. He wondered if they really did need extra chains in the logging camp, or if it was just the first excuse Candy could think of to get Joe out of explaining himself. He leaned back against one of the bales. Having only grabbed about a half hour of sleep on the floor in front of Hoss’s room, he was still very tired. A few minutes wouldn’t hurt.

*****

Candy left the house soon after Ben and Hoss. He looked around but saw no hint of where Joe had made off to. Slightly concerned considering the conversation that they had abruptly cut off, he checked the barn and found both his horse Eli and Joe’s horse Cocise still in their stalls. He turned a full circle but didn’t see Joe. Now more than a little concerned, he went back outside and did a full lap around the barn. Still no sign of the other man. He knocked on the door to the outhouse and found it empty as well. Candy returned to the barn. Joe had saddled both his brother’s and father’s horses, so he had to have been there. He took note of the fresh hay that had been tossed down and climbed the ladder. 

He received an instant adrenaline rush when he saw Joe lying flat in the hay up in the loft. In panic, he crossed the small area in three strides and knelt down beside the other man. He shook him harshly by the arm and Joe woke with a start, sitting up abruptly and nearly smashing his head into Candy’s from how close the other man had been bent over him.

“Jesus Christ, Joe!”

“What?”

“What do you mean, what? You just got done telling me how you wanted to kill yourself then I find you unconscious up here in the hayloft! You mean to tell me you just fell asleep?”

“Sorry…”

“I don’t want you to be sorry, I want you to be alright.”

“I didn’t mean to worry you, Candy. I’m just so tired. All the time.”

“Do you still want to do it?”

“I mean, not at the moment. But it just seems like a good thing to have planned out. Just in case. Like a back door to escape through if everything else goes south.”

The two men just looked at each other before Joe continued speaking. “That can’t be a healthy thought process, can it.” Less of a question and more of an admission that he knew it was not good to be thinking those things.

Candy shook his head, relieved to have found Joe unharmed, but alarmed to hear him voice such thoughts. “Come on. Might as well get up to the timber camp. Think they actually need more chains?” He grinned at his friend and led the way back down the ladder.

*****

Joe regretted entering the camp nearly instantly. The looks thrown his way and the snide comments that were tossed at him hit home and bit sharp. The loggers separated him from Candy neatly and swiftly.

“I’ll be right back, Joe. Curtis and I are just gonna go over a few things on the map.”

“Okay, I’ll go get a list for the supplies.”

As he walked to the supply cabin, though, he soon found himself surrounded instead. A few of the men had worked for the Ponderosa before, but the majority of the group was made up of new hires. People who had not met Joe before and who only knew about him from the rumors that ran rampant in Virginia City. 

“We heard what you done, Cartwright.”

“Then you also heard that I was proven innocent.”

“I heard that you bribed your way out.”

“Naw, he didn’t. I heard he threatened that girl again and she only changed her story so that he wouldn’t kill her.”

“Tell us, how many others you done that to huh?”

“Seems to me you shouldn’t oughtta be runnin’ around free after all that.”

“We could take care a that right now. I got some rope.”

Joe’s eyes widened as the taunts changed to threats and soon found himself backed up against the small shack that had been built to be used for the chuck. 

“Come on. Tell us the truth. She lead you on and change her mind at the last minute? Is that why?”

“Naw. I bet he’s just that cold hearted and did it for a thrill.”

“The whole territory would be better off without you around.”

“Now hold on! I didn’t do anything and you know it!” Joe tried to stand up for himself. Tried to push his way past the circle of men that had him surrounded. But he was shoved back against the wall and held there.

“Come on, Cartwright. Admit it!” 

“You aren’t worth the horse you rode in on!”

“He ain’t worth the air he’s breathin’!”

He ducked the first hand, but couldn’t avoid the second. Next thing he knew, Joe had been dragged away from the small building. He struggled against the hold they had on him, successfully getting one arm loose. He swung wildly and managed to get one good hit in. The man doubled over where Joe slugged him hard in the belly. Joe twisted around trying to get his other arm free. Instead of being successful this time, though, he felt a sudden sharp pain and his whole left arm went numb. He gasped and stopped struggling immediately, not wanting to make anything worse than what had already happened. But his compliance only lasted a moment until he saw one of the men coming at him with a rope. Joe panicked. As much as he had wanted to end it all last night, he had wanted to do it on his own terms. And since talking with Candy had come to realize what a stupid decision it had been to make. 

So he yanked his already hurt arm and kicked out at the same time. He didn’t care where he hit the men, and it was with a certain amount of satisfaction that he knocked one square between the legs. The man holding the rope dropped to his knees in pain. Another man reached for the rope he dropped, but was stopped short by a bullet kicking the dirt up right in front of his hand.

“Let. Him. Go.” Candy stood with his revolver cocked again and his blue eyes ice cold. 

“Aww we was just havin’ some fun.”

“Fun. What you were doing can be counted as attempted murder. You’re all fired, and if I ever see any single one of you again, you can bet that-”

“Candy, don’t fire them.”

Candy kept his gun and eyes trained on the group of men, but turned his head slightly toward his friend as Joe pulled away from them and walked over to him. “You don’t want them to just get away with this?”

“If you fire them, we won’t make the deadlines. Sides, they weren’t really going to do it. Were you?” Joe challenged them. He held his left arm tight to his body and grimaced as he moved.

He was met with numerous agreements, nods, and assurances. 

“There, see? Just leave it.”

“Joe…”

“Please. Drop it.” He beseeched the other man before turning and walking away from the whole group. He wasn’t sure what Candy was planning on doing, but he was planning on leaving the logging camp as soon as possible. He figured to go and actually mark all the trees in the new section as he had intended to start yesterday. Joe made it back over to where they had left their horses and stood next to Cochise. He kept his left arm clenched up against his rib cage and reached up with his right hand to grasp his horse’s mane. Mounting with just one hand, and his non-dominant one at that, was an awkward experience, but he eventually floundered into the saddle. He breathed deeply to try to assuage the pain radiating from his left shoulder. It had begun to make him feel faint and he concentrated on staying on his horse. Cochise got the message and moved smoothly out of the camp. Joe heard a single set of hoofbeats following him, and as soon as he made it around the corner and out of sight, he pulled his horse to a stop and leaned forward in the saddle. 

He let the pain wash over him and gave in to the misery that it caused him. He felt a slight sheen of sweat break out across his forehead and he gritted his teeth with each wave of pain that fanned out from his injured joint. Joe waited for Candy to catch up and knew that he would be in for a lecture. 

“Joe, what are you thinking letting them get away with that?” Candy pulled Eli to a stop and looked at Joe with the expectation that he would get an answer. His eyebrows drew down as he fully took in Joe’s full countenance. “What’s wrong? Did they hurt you before I got there?”

Joe shrugged his good shoulder. He’d get Candy to reset his shoulder later. For now, he kinda felt as if he deserved the pain. At least it gave him something to focus on other than the thoughts rattling around inside his own head. “I’m going to mark the trees in the next section. That’s where I had gone yesterday. I never actually came to the timber camp.”

“Yeah, I figured that after seeing how they welcomed you just now.” He eyed the way Joe carefully kept his left arm tucked and imobile. “Want me to take a look at that?”

Joe glared at him and urged his horse forward again. The next section was just a few miles away. He could make it there. He lasted another ten minutes before pulling Cochise to a halt again. He couldn’t make it there. Each step the pinto took seemed to shake the joint apart. He simply sat in the saddle with his head hanging low and waited for his friend to stop beside him. 

“Can I look at it now?”

Joe nodded, so Candy dismounted and walked to stand next to Cochise. “Can you get down?”

Joe wavered slightly. His lack of sleep and questionable nourishment over the last month had started to take a toll on his body. The added pain now had him seeing spots and just wanting the day to be over. He shook his head.

“Okay. Just… here.” Candy reached up and braced Joe with one hand against his ribs underneath his left arm. His right hand slid up Joe’s back as far as he could reach and he tugged gently. The other man trusted Candy to balance him and slowly brought his right leg over the cantle with the certainty that Candy would catch him. Sure enough, Candy shifted as Joe’s weight settled in his arms and he helped lower him to the ground.

“Is it broken?”

“I don’t think so. But it’s definitely dislocated.” He grunted quietly when he accidently moved his shoulder slightly as they walked to a nearby stump. Joe sat on it and breathed in relief that he was no longer moving. He clutched his left arm at the elbow, needing to keep it still, but not wanting to touch his shoulder in the fear that would make it hurt worse.

“Want me to put it back in, or make camp first?”

“Camp.” Joe was still trying to gain control of the pain and wasn’t ready for it to be compounded yet. 

“Okay.” Candy patted Joe once on his good shoulder and moved back to the horses. Soon he had both untacked and hobbled and a fire built next to where he placed their bed rolls. Just in time too as the sun had set and the shadows began to take over.

“Alright Joe. Ready?”

Joe sighed. “No, but I suppose I can’t put it off any longer.” He eased himself down onto the closest bedroll and lay flat on his back. Candy knelt by his side and as gently as he could took hold of Joe’s left arm just above his wrist with both hands. He waited for Joe to inhale then pulled his arm firmly straight down on his exhale. He flinched at the sucking and slight pop that sounded as Joe’s joint slid back into place and tried to block out the scream that broke out of the other man.

When it was over, Candy glanced up at Joe’s face. His eyes were tightly shut and his jaw clenched. He breathed quickly and harshly through his nose, obviously trying to once again overcome the pain he found himself in. Candy unbuttoned Joe’s shirt and moved it aside enough to see the joint. It was bruised, but back in position. Pleased with his handiwork, Candy patted Joe twice on the left thigh and stood to move to his own bedroll. About half an hour had passed, and he was startled when the other man spoke.

“Do you agree with them?”

“With who?”

“Those guys at the logging camp. Everyone in town.”

“What did they say to you?”

“Nothin new. Mostly that I shouldn’t have been let go. That I’m a terrible person. Not worth even the air I breathe, I believe one said.”

“Joe, you know I don’t believe any of that. I know you didn’t do it. I know you are a good guy.” He turned over to look at Joe across the fire. “And I know you’re having a hard go of it right now, but I really do care about you. You’re my friend, Joe. I want you to be happy. And I want to help you.” 

Joe was silent again for a number of minutes before he spoke again, “Candy?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“Being such a hassle. Making you stay out here with me. Just everything.”

“Joe, I don’t mind any of that. I want to, cause that’s what friends are for.”

Joe lapsed into silence, but even as tired as he was, he struggled to fall asleep. And when he finally did, his mind tormented him with faceless voices all telling him in various ways that he was worthless. Waking after just a few hours, he stared up at the stars that peaked through the pines. The slight breeze that blew through the trees was enough to make their crowns sway just enough so the stars flickered in and out of sight. The longer he watched the heavens, the less significant he felt. In all the space on Earth and beyond, he was just a speck. There was not a single reason he could see for him to stay part of this world. 

He shook himself from those thoughts and sat up. Candy was asleep on the other side of the fire that was starting to burn low. Joe moved as quietly as he could and pulled his revolver from the holster that Candy had propped against his saddle for him. He crept across their camp and crouched down next to the other man before placing the weapon next to Candy’s own. Joe didn’t trust himself right now, and if it was within his reach, he worried he might do something that he wouldn’t live to regret. So he figured to just remove temptation. After a pause, he drew his hunting knife from his boot and placed that next to his gun as well before returning to his own bedroll and lying down again to wait for the rest that simply wouldn’t come.

*****

Candy woke the next morning and was surprised to see a hunting knife and another revolver sitting next to his own. He recognized them immediately as being Joe’s and simply tucked it into his waistband and chose not to make a big deal about it. He was both proud of the other man for having made the choice to give up the weapons and saddened that Joe even felt he needed to. They didn’t speak much as the water boiled for coffee, nor as Candy saddled both horses. Joe had tucked his left arm into his shirt and used it as a make-shift sling. While his joint was back where it belonged, it was still very sore and he didn’t want to move it any more than absolutely necessary. 

“Joe, if your arm is bothering you, we can just ride home.”

“No, it’s fine. Just a bit sore. I’ll be fine for the marking.”

By the end of the next week, both men were tired, sore, and full of sap. But Joe’s mood had started to improve. He had talked a few things over with his friend and while no permanent answers were forthcoming, he felt better just from having someone listen. They wrapped up the project and decided to head into town before going back to the Ponderosa. Joe wasn’t sure if he was looking forward to it, but at some point he had to face the rumors. If he kept hiding from them, the people would be more likely to believe them to be true. So he held his head high and rode next to his friend as they entered Virginia City.

***** CHAPTER 4

The first thing both men noticed as they rode down the main street was that all eyes were on them. But no one came up to speak to either of them until they pulled up in front of the sheriff’s office. Joe wanted to have a chat with Sheriff Coffee before anything else, just to make sure he was open about being in town. He wasn’t planning on starting anything, but he also couldn’t guarantee what anyone else would do.

As they walked together into the office, a voice rang out, “Hey, Cartwright!”

Joe paused with his hand on the doorknob and closed his eyes briefly before turning to respond. 

“Yeah?” He was surprised to see one of the loggers that they employed on the Ponderosa. Specifically the man who had been determined to string him up. The other man walked across the street and stood facing both Joe and Candy. 

“Listen, I’m sorry. For how me and the boys treated you.”

Joe traded a glance with Candy who just shrugged. 

“What’s with the change of mind?” 

“Well we know now you had nothin’ to do with what happened. And we’re just sorry for doing that to ya.”

“I told you I had nothing to do with it. You knew I had been proven innocent.”

“Yeah, but you know how it is. All those people sayin’… and we figgered that you just was trying ta weasel outta it.”

“No, I don’t know how it is. But I expect to get no problems from you from here on out.”

“No problems, of course.” He put his hat back on and left them alone again.

Joe and Candy traded another look before pushing open the sheriff’s office door. Sheriff Roy Coffee rose from his desk and greeted the pair.

“Little Joe! Candy! Nice ta see you both. What can I do for ya?”

“What’s going on out there? Everyone was looking like they still didn’t trust me, but then Silas came up just now and said he finally believed I was telling the truth the whole time.”

“Oh you hadn’t heard then.”

“Heard what? Joe and I’ve been out marking timber for the last 8 days.”

“Two more girls were attacked. Bout a week ago, Tuesday.”

“Roy, that’s terrible, but I fail to see how that changed anyone’s view point.”

“Well it didn’t at first a course. But a coupla days ago, that man Silas, he came in here and told me that you was in their logging camp when everything was happening here. Four of the men with him backed him up on that story. Fact is, they spread all over town that there was no way you were anywhere near town when them two poor girls were attacked. Everyone’s been feeling a might poorly on how they treated ya now and we all figger it’s the same man who done it the first time.”

Joe sat down in one of the chairs and brushed his hand down his face. While that would make his life easier with interacting with people in town, it didn’t fix all the problems that he had with himself. Words cut deep, and sometimes the invisible wounds took the longest to heal.

“And I had another talk with Victoria. Wanted to find out why she had blamed you in the first place. She finally come out and told me that it was dark and she never saw his face.”

“So what, she just chose me? At random? And ruined my life?” Candy placed his hand on Joe’s shoulder before turning back to hear the sheriff’s answer.

“She said the man who DID do it told her to put the blame on you.” 

“And these other two?”

“Well their stories mostly match so it hadta be the same person both times. Aside from one thing. They both say that whoever he was grabbed them and hauled them inta a dark alley. And they each say they saw his face. Most of it at least.”

“Most of it?” 

“They both say he was wearing an eyepatch.”

“Ok, so look for someone with an eyepatch!”

“It ain’t that easy. One of them girls say the man’s other eye was blue the other says it was brown. So now if that ain’t accurate, I don’t know what else ain’t true. So unless there’s someone here with colour changin’ eyes, they was told what to say agin and we’re right back where we started.”

Joe looked up at Candy, shock written plainly on his face. Candy returned the look grimly. “I think that’s exactly what it is. And I think I know not only who it is, but also where to find him. Roy, a number of years ago when I was scouting for the army, I rode with a man with one blue eye and one brown. And I just saw him in town here not long ago. Said he was gonna get work up at one of the silver mines.”

Roy nodded and thanked them both before calling out for his deputy and leaving straight off to the mines. There were a lot around though, and he didn’t have very high hopes of finding the man before word got out that he was looking for him. Still, he figured he’d have to try.

*****

Joe and Candy decided to hit up the Silver Dollar before going back to the ranch, but as soon as they left the sheriff’s office, they felt eyes on them again. Joe crossed the street to avoid the group that was standing a few doors down from them, and Candy followed him. They had nearly made it to the saloon when a light voice hailed him. Joe tried to ignore the woman who had called out. It was Grace Murtree, the lady from the diner who had made her disdain for him very clear. He was out of luck when she caught up to them and reached out to touch his arm. He deftly stepped back out of reach but stopped and turned to watch her warily. Candy stopped with him and looked around to make sure no one else was going to catch them by surprise while she held Joe’s attention. 

Grace took a breath then looked Joe straight in the eye. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for how I treated you and for how I threw away all the trust I had in you previously. You told us nothing but the truth and no one believed you. And now it’s happened again…”

“Maybe I did do it Ms. Murtree. How do you know that I wasn’t the perpetrator this time too?”

“Well that man Silas, he said you were in the logging camp. Everyone in town heard him.”

“He’s just saying I wasn’t here. Just like I said I wasn’t here for the first one. But now you believe him?” Candy touched Joe lightly in the small of his back. While he understood Joe’s frustration, he really didn’t want any trouble to start. “What makes you believe him but not me?” Joe shook his head sadly. “No Ms. Murtree, I just can’t accept your apology. See the way I figure it, everyone in town called me a liar and a rapist, even after being proven innocent. And I’ve lived here all my life. I know all you folks. But no one even tried to believe me. Then someone comes in and says the exact words that I did and he’s trusted, even though he’s been here for all of, what, three months? Have you ever had that happen to you, Ms. Murtree? It cuts deep. And some relationships just can’t be repaired. Have a good night.”

Joe left her standing on the boardwalk and turned back the way they had come. Candy followed silently. They mounted their horses and rode out of town without another interaction.

“I’m sorry, Candy. I know you wanted to get in on that game the Silver Dollar has tonight. You don’t have to come with me right now, you know.”

“You sure?”

“Sure I’m sure. I’ll see ya at home.” With that, Joe urged his pinto to an easy lope and headed back toward the Ponderosa. Candy turned Eli and started back toward Virginia City. He just reached town limits when he shook his head at himself and turned his horse again. Something told him he should catch up with his friend. The sun had passed its zenith while they were in town, and now started its downward trek toward the horizon. Candy started to worry when he had ridden a few miles without catching up to Joe. He and the pinto hadn’t been moving that fast when they parted; he should have overcome him by now. 

Hoping that Joe had simply decided to run his horse as he always had in the past, Candy continued back toward the Ponderosa.

*****

Joe was lost in his thoughts again and let Cochise choose his pace. The pinto alternated between a slow lope and a steady trot. He knew the way home, and would get them there eventually. What neither of them expected was the rope that snaked its way suddenly into the air above the pair and settled down over Joe’s shoulders. He startled back to the present and tried to get it off, but didn’t succeed before he felt it tighten and yank him sideways and out of the saddle. In shock, Joe struggled to his feet and tried again to free himself. This time he nearly loosened the lariat only for it to jerk tight again and harshly force him back to the ground. Then he was pressed into the dust as a body landed on top of him. He fought back as best he could with both arms secured to his body by the rope. He knew he got in at least one good hit, and a kick or two landed solidly, but in the end, and having been caught off guard, Joe found himself over powered. He looked up and tried to see who it was, but his attacker kept the sun directly behind him and all Joe got was the glare. 

One more solid blow to his head and Joe was sufficiently subdued enough for the man to remove the lariat from around his arms and instead tie it tight around both wrists. He walked back to his sorrel and wound the other end of the rope around the saddle horn and mounted the horse. Joe blinked his eyes hard. He finally focused his vision enough to see the man slap his mount with his hat and the horse took off across the rough, uneven territory. Joe felt his arms yanked first, then his whole body dragged along behind. The man took his horse off the road and through the brush of the Nevada plains. Joe shut his eyes after the first sagebrush slapped him in the face. He felt his shirt tear with each patch of bunchgrass he was dragged through.

The sorrel tossed up rocks as she ran and Joe was lucky enough to be missed by nearly all of them. He came quickly out of his daze from being knocked over the head and tried to pull on the rope holding him captive. But it did no good. The man kept his mount to a lope and made sure to steer her through as many patches of scrub as he could. When he finally pulled her to a stop, and looked behind him, Joe was lying limp on the ground, stretched out where he had rolled to a stop. The man dismounted and strolled back to Joe.

He laughed as he kicked the youngest Cartwright to roll him over and smiled with his success when he saw the front of Joe’s shirt was shredded and traces of blood and torn flesh showed through. His pants were in similar condition, but not quite as bad, as the fabric had been thicker. His holster was empty. The man frowned at that, as he could have used the extra money from selling the weapon, but figured that it had come loose while he was dragging the other man. He pulled the rope around and down to loop around Joe’s ankles as well and yanked it tight so his wrists were behind him and his feet pulled up. When he was done, Joe was securely hogtied, moaning in pain, and barely conscious. The man laughed again and walked a fair distance away and settled down to wait.

*****

Candy had covered way too much distance to not have caught up to Joe. He turned Eli again and rode back along the same road, keeping an eye for anything that looked like a disturbance or an area where someone might have left the trail. He still had both Joe’s gun and knife, so he knew that the other man wouldn’t be able to harm himself with them; however, this also meant that Joe wouldn’t be able to signal for help if anything happened to him beyond his control. Candy slowed his bay as he found an area of the road where it looked like two horses had left recently at a fast pace. He frowned when he saw deep marks behind one of the horse’s tracks almost like something was being dragged behind. Hearing a horse approach around the bend, he drew his sidearm only to reholster it when he recognized the pinto that trotted up to him. 

“Hey boy. Where’s your rider?” Candy caught the horse and checked him over, finding no harm had been done to him and he wasn’t lame. Now thoroughly worried, Candy remounted Eli and ponied Cochise along with him to follow the other set of tracks. 

He didn’t have to go very far before finding what he was looking for. With a shout, he nearly fell as he dismounted in such a hurry. The figure on the ground he ran toward didn’t move a bit, even as a shot rang out and dust puffed up in front of Candy. He skidded to a stop and spun in a circle, trying to find where the shot had come from.

“Nuh-uh. I wouldn’t!”

“What do you want with him?” Candy shouted back, his hands in the air and finally locating a figure that held a rifle, pointed directly at him.

“Nothin. I want you. But this was the easiest way to get you here.” The man made his way slowly down to Candy and instructed him to toss his revolver away. Candy did as instructed and lifted his sidearm out of its holster and tossed it to the other man. He tried to gauge if the man knew that he had Joe’s gun tucked in the back of his belt. 

“Very good. Now. I have some questions for you.”

“Some questions? I don’t even know who you are!”

“Why, don’t you recognize your old buddy?” The man was close now and he tipped his hat back and looked right at Candy with a sinister grin.

Candy flexed his jaw as he saw two different colour eyes looking back at him. “Calico. Why have you done this? Joe didn’t do a thing to you! And neither have I!” He made another move toward his friend on the ground, but stopped short when Calico chambered another round. 

“Not until I get answers.”

“Then ask the questions!”

“How did you figure out it was me who did it?”

“Who did wh- the girls? Well that would be because you were sloppy. You musta forgotten which eye you put that patch on, Calico. They each reported different eye colours. Now how many men you think are around here like that?”

“So you just turned over my name to the sheriff, just like that?”

“Just like that.” Candy grinned at his old acquaintance before dropping his gaze back down to his friend as he heard a groan. “Listen, you can do what you want with me. But let me help him. He’s got nothing to do with this.” 

Calico kept his rifle trained on Candy, but gestured with it to allow him to go to Joe. Candy knelt down beside the other man and drew Joe’s own knife to cut his bonds. He grimaced at the shape Joe was in, knowing there really wasn’t anything he could do to help without even the most basic of medical supplies. Joe groaned again as he tried to fight his way back to awareness and Candy brushed dirt and blood off of his face. 

“Take it easy, Joe. I’ll get you outta this.” He smiled as best he could when hazel eyes flicked open and looked up at him clearly. Joe was hurt, badly, but he was aware enough to recognize his friend and portray with a look that he trusted Candy. 

Calico moved, circling the two friends on the ground, and Candy turned with him to keep his back away from the man. One because he didn’t trust him, and two because he didn’t want him to see the second revolver he carried. 

“Just let us go. You got your answers, and if you hold us here any longer, someone else is gonna see that very obvious trail you left and come investigate. Maybe even the sheriff. When he doesn’t find you at the mining camps, he’ll probably ride out to the Ponderosa to come see if I know anything else. And that’ll bring him right past here.”

Calico glanced away from the two men and back over his shoulder the way they had come. Joe took his chance. He pulled the revolver from Candy’s belt and fired in one smooth motion under the other man’s arm. Calico yelped and dropped the rifle to grasp at his now bleeding shoulder. Candy bolted toward the man and kicked the rifle away. Soon he was trussed up face down across his own saddle and ready to be taken into town.

Candy sat next to Joe who was trying to find the ability to stand and walk to his own horse. Everything hurt, but none of the gashes seemed life threatening. He was pretty sure a few ribs were cracked though, and he was surprised that his shoulder had not come back out of socket.

“We’re closer to the Ponderosa than we are to town. Maybe we should just go there instead and send someone in to notify Roy.”

Joe nodded. He’d probably agree to whatever Candy suggested right now with how tired, miserable, and in pain he was. But he was feeling oddly a bit more positive after finding out who was actually responsible for the attacks on the two girls last week. A thought occurred to him and he inhaled to ask, “Was he the first one too? Wonder why he made her give my name…” Candy had no answer, and from the sound of it, Calico wouldn’t be very cooperative any time soon.

The two friends slowly stood and shuffled over to Cochise and Eli. Candy helped Joe mount and wondered if this was the safest decision or if he’d be scraping Joe off the dusty Nevada ground again before they even made it back to the ranch house. Joe’s stubborn streak made an appearance though, and he stayed mounted the whole way back to the Ponderosa. Candy called out for one of the hands to ride for both the doctor and the sheriff before helping Joe upstairs then forcing Calico into the bunkhouse under armed guard. He took the time to get some answers of his own then rejoined Joe in his room.

“How’re ya feeling?”

“Mentally or physically?”

“Both I suppose.”

“Like crap… I wish I knew why he had told Victoria to blame me.”

Candy nodded. That was one of the answers he had convinced Calico to part with. “He had planned to just rob her family. She was in the wrong place at the wrong time. And then he had to come up with a scapegoat, so he threatened her and instructed her to tell your name because he had just heard it when he rolled into town. Seems like you were just unlucky enough to be the name he heard in a passing conversation.”

Joe closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the headboard. Candy had him propped up at an angle in bed and leaning against numerous pillows to try to assuage the ache in his ribs. Joe had struggled out of his torn clothes and with the other man’s help, had cleaned up as best he could. He was surprised to find that his injuries didn’t seem to be as bad off as he felt. He had some pretty ugly contusions all over, and he suspected a few cracked ribs, if not fully broken. But other than that, he was all in one piece.

Candy sat in the chair next to the bed. “Think you can forgive all the people in town?”

Joe sighed and grimaced as it stretched his rib cage. “I dunno. But I suppose I’ll learn to live with them again anyway. One thing though.”

“What’s that?”

“You keep coming back for me. Keep trying to help.”

“Of course I do, Joe. You’re my friend.”

“But how long are you willing to do that for? What happens when I just… get to be too much?”

“I suppose it’s for as long as you need. Listen, there’s only one you. And I’d like to keep you around. Plenty of people do. You might not see it in yourself right now, but I see someone who cares deeply and holds loyalty above all else. I see a man who will stand up for his principles and who strives for justice. You’re worth more than you will ever know.”

“You’re not gonna give up on me?”

“Nope.”

“Then I guess I won’t give up on me either.”

END