Summary:  The boys decide that Ben is lonely and each of them try to set him up with a woman.
Rating:  G  (10,100 words)

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The Set Up

 

Hoss Cartwright made a face in the mirror and tried yet again to do up his tie. ‘Dadburnit!’ he muttered under his breath as the ends tangled yet again.

 

‘Need some help?’

 

Hoss turned to see Adam leaning against the door of his bedroom, his arms crossed in front of him and an amused expression on his face.

 

‘Thanks,’ he said. ‘Dadburned tie won’t sit straight.  I don’t see why we haveta wear em anyways!’

 

‘We have to wear them because the ladies expect it,’ said Adam calmly as he walked across the room and began to tie his brother’s tie. You want to look your best for them don’t you?’

 

‘Well sure,’ replied Hoss. ‘Only I can still look my best without a tie can’t I?  Not too tight Adam … you’re choking me!’

 

‘Hold still,’ said his brother in the same calm voice. ‘I don’t know why you make such a fuss about wearing a tie all the time. There … all done.’

 

Hoss turned back and examined his reflection in the mirror again. ‘Thanks,’ he said. ‘Although I’d be a mite more comfortable without it.’

 

‘If you had your way you’d go to the social in your work clothes,’ said a voice from behind them and they both turned to see Little Joe grinning at them.

 

Adam sniffed the air. ‘Have you been into my bay rum cologne again?’ he asked suspiciously.

 

Joe gave his brother one of his best puppy dog looks. ‘Aw gee Adam!  You just finished telling Hoss he should look his best. You want me to as well, don’t you?’

 

‘Just stay out of my things,’ replied Adam firmly. ‘I’ve told you before …’

 

‘We’re gonna be late if we don’t get a move on,’ interrupted Joe. ‘Come on!’ He sprang from the room before his older brother could say any more.

 

Adam shook his head. ‘Come on Hoss,’ he said. ‘We’d better keep up with him or he’s likely to get into trouble.’

 

Ben Cartwright looked up as his three sons descended the stairs. ‘Well,’ he said with a smile. ‘Don’t all of you look fine!’

 

‘Thanks Pa,’ said Joe, puffing up his chest. ‘I reckon there’s gonna be some ladies there tonight right glad that the Cartwright boys are at the social. Specially the youngest and best-looking one,’ he added with a grin.

 

Ben gave his youngest son a look that spoke volumes, but which only caused Joe’s grin to widen. ‘Are you sure you don’t want to come with us Pa?’ asked Adam as he reached the bottom step. ‘It’d do you good to get out and see some people.’

 

Ben settled himself further into his favourite easy chair and puffed on his pipe. ‘No thank you son,’ he said. ‘I’ll just have a quiet night here.  Off you go and enjoy yourselves.’

 

‘I reckon you should come with us Pa,’ said Hoss as he put on his coat. ‘You’d have a good time.’

 

‘Yeah Pa,’ chimed in Joe as he slicked his hair down yet again before putting on his best hat. ‘There’ll be plenty of gals for all of us there!’

 

‘I’m fine here,’ insisted their father. ‘Now off you go and have a good time boys …’ he looked around the edge of the chair. ‘Oh … and Joseph?’

 

Joe gave his father another grin. ‘Yeah Pa?’

 

‘Behave yourself young man,’ said his father meaningfully, pointing his pipe at his youngest son.

 

Joe looked hurt. ‘Don’t I always?’ he asked defensively.

 

Adam grabbed his youngest brother by the arm and steered him towards the door. ‘I’ll see to it Pa,’ he said. ‘Come on you.’ Ben chuckled as his three sons left the room and then settled himself back into his chair and opened the book that was on his lap.

 

Outside, the three Cartwright boys made their way towards the barn. ‘What was that supposed ta mean?’ asked Joe, wriggling free of Adam’s grasp. ‘I can behave myself.’

 

‘Really?’ asked Adam. ‘Well I’ve yet to see you do it.  Besides, it makes Pa feel better when I say that.’

 

‘Hey Adam?’ asked Joe as they mounted up. ‘Why don’t Pa ever come with us ta the socials?  Don’t he like em?’

 

‘Of course he does,’ said Adam. ‘He’s come to some of them in the past, hasn’t he?’

 

‘Well yeah, but not lately,’ said Joe as they rode out of the yard together. ‘He kinda looked a bit lonely tonight, didn’t ya think?  I reckon he shoulda come with us.’

 

‘If Pa wanted to come, then he would have,’ replied Adam.

 

‘Ya know, I reckon Joe’s right,’ said Hoss. ‘Pa don’t get out near enough to meet people and have a good time.’

 

‘He’s always out and about,’ said Adam. ‘You know that.’

 

‘Well yeah,’ said Hoss. ‘But not fer socializing.  He jest goes to town on business and stuff is all.’

 

‘He has plenty of friends,’ said Adam. ‘Just last week Roy Coffee was out to visit and you know how Paul Martin is always calling in when he’s not busy. Pa often sees friends in town as well.’

 

‘Yeah but I reckon Hoss means of the female variety, don’t ya Hoss?’ said Joe with a cheeky grin.

 

Hoss nodded thoughtfully. ‘Yeah,’ he said. ‘Ya must admit Adam, that since Little Joe’s ma died Pa ain’t exactly been one to socialise with the ladies much. I reckon it’s about time that he did.’

 

‘Maybe he doesn’t want to?’ said Adam. ‘We all know how much Marie’s death affected him.’  He stole a glance at Joe to see how his little brother was taking this turn of the conversation.  Joe always got so emotional about things … especially when it came to his mother.  However, this time he looked fine.

 

‘Well yeah,’ Joe said. ‘But that was an awful long time ago.  I reckon Pa’s kinda lonely fer female company like Hoss says.’

 

‘Well if he was, then he’d do something about it,’ said Adam firmly. ‘Now come on you two. If we don’t hurry up we’re going to miss out on our choice of partners.’  He urged his horse to a quicker gait, which was matched by that of his brothers.

 

‘Not me,’ boasted Joe. ‘Them Virginia City gals won’t choose their partners until I get there and they realise they can’t all have me at once.’  He gave his brothers a cheeky grin and spurred his horse forward before either of them could answer him.

 

 

===============

 

 

‘Nice to see you Adam.’

 

Adam turned at the sound of the voice beside him and smiled to see Paul Martin standing there. ‘Oh hi Paul,’ he said.

 

‘Is your father here?’

 

Adam shook his head. ‘No. You know Pa.  He’s taking the opportunity while we’re all here to have a quiet night at home.’

 

Paul nodded. ‘I see,’ he said. ‘I was hoping that he might have come this time.’

 

Adam studied the man for a moment, his conversation with his brothers still fresh in his mind. ‘You were?’ he asked. ‘How come?’

 

‘Just thought it would be good for him,’ said the doctor with a smile. ‘Everyone needs a bit of socialising now and then.’

 

‘Paul you know my father pretty well, don’t you?’

 

Paul shrugged. ‘As well as anyone around here I suppose,’ he admitted. ‘We’ve been friends for quite a few years now.’

 

‘Does Pa strike you as lonely?’

 

‘How so?’

 

‘Well … you know … for female companionship.’  Adam cleared his throat. ‘I was just wondering.’

 

Paul nodded. ‘Now and then,’ he admitted. ‘Your father is a man who enjoys the companionship of women Adam and it’s been a long time since he had a serious relationship.  I’m sure that he misses it at times.’  He studied the young man beside him for a moment. ‘What brought this on?’

 

‘Oh nothing really,’ said Adam. ‘My brothers and I were just discussing it on the way here tonight. I told them that if he was, then he’d do something about it.’

 

‘Well that’s true to a certain extent,’ said Paul. ‘However you must admit that the range of available women of your father’s age around here is somewhat limited.’ He smiled. ‘I know … I’ve personally looked around.’

 

Adam watched the man move away, lost in his thoughts for a few moments. The problem was that they were all so busy with their own love lives that he doubted if any of them had ever even stopped to consider Pa’s before.  Since Marie had died they had all just assumed that their father was content to be a bachelor and be … well … just Pa.  Perhaps it was time that he took some time out from raising them and had some time to himself? Heaven knows he deserved it.  Yet, as Paul had so accurately put it … the choices for female companionship for their father were extremely limited.

 

Adam looked around the room which was filled with people of all ages, from young children right through to old Mrs Mackman who was sitting in the corner.  Surely there had to be someone who would be suitable for his father amongst this crowd?  His eyes lit up as they spied Widow Jenkins talking to Sheriff Coffee.  Now there was a woman … He shook his head as he considered it.  No … Pa had often said how much she bored him.  She wouldn’t be suitable at all.  Adam sauntered off around the room, hoping against hope that he might spy someone in the crowd who was suitable for his father.

 

Hoss was for once having a great time.  He’d danced every dance with Bessie Sue and hadn’t stepped on her toes any more than usual and now he was occupied in his favourite party activity … piling up a couple of plates of food for himself and his female companion. ‘Thank you ma’am,’ he said as Mrs Marrins handed him a piece of cake. ‘That looks right tasty.’

 

‘I hope you find it delicious Hoss,’ the woman said with a smile. ‘I baked it myself.’

 

‘Sure enough?’ Hoss’ eyes lit up. ‘Well I’m sure ….’  He studied the tall woman beside him for a moment.

 

‘Is something the matter?’ asked Mrs Marrins anxiously.

 

‘Oh no ma’am,’ said Hoss. ‘I was just thinking how you must be the best darned cook round these parts is all.’

 

Mrs Marrins blushed. ‘Thank you for saying so Hoss,’ she said happily.

 

‘Yes ma’am,’ added Hoss eagerly. ‘My Pa was only saying so just the other day.’

 

‘He was?’

 

‘Sure enough.  He loves your cooking.  He reckons that your restaurant is the best darn one in town.’

 

‘Well Hoss, it’s actually the only one in town you know,’ she said with a light laugh.

 

‘Well yeah … but he reckons you’ve improved it since you took it over and all.’

 

‘Well thank you.  It has been hard since Frank died to keep it going, I must admit.’

 

Hoss raised his eyebrow. ‘That’s right,’ he said. ‘You must need a man at times ta help out, huh?’

 

‘At times,’ the woman replied.  She gave Hoss another smile before turning to serve someone else.

 

Hoss continued to stare at her for a full minute. ‘Well I’ll be,’ he said under his breath. ‘How come that never occurred ta me before?’  He grinned as he walked away with the two plates of food in his hands.

 

Joe was as busy as he usually was at a social.  Even though his brothers knew that his remark about all the girls waiting for him was partly a joke, all the Cartwrights had to acknowledge that the youngest member of the family was extremely popular.  His good looks combined with his fetching personality meant that he was always in demand as a partner at these occasions, and so it wasn’t until towards the end of the evening that he actually had a moment to catch his breath.  That moment came just as Adam happened to be wandering past with a strange look in his eye.

 

‘Hi older brother,’ said Joe cheerfully. ‘Whatcha looking for?’

 

Adam hesitated, not willing to include his youngest sibling in his plans. ‘Nothing,’ he said. ‘What are you up to over here in the corner by yourself?’

 

‘Not much,’ said Joe innocently. ‘Just taking a breather is all.  Them gals’ve had me dancing for hours.  You know how popular I am!’  He gave Adam a cheeky grin.

 

‘Hmm.  Well just be ready to go when Hoss and I are,’ replied Adam. ‘And make sure that you don’t get into any trouble.’ He sauntered off, still searching the crowd for a likely candidate for his father’s attentions. Joe poked his tongue out at his brother’s back.  Sometimes that Adam could get extremely bossy!

 

‘What’s that for?’ asked a soft voice beside him.

 

Joe turned and smiled at the girl. ‘Hi Becky,’ he said. ‘Oh, it’s only my older brother Adam again.  Sometimes he’s worse than Pa.’

 

‘Is your father here?’ asked the girl.

 

‘Nuh.  He stayed at home this time,’ Joe replied. ‘I wish he’d come sometimes.  I think he gets kinda lonely.’

 

Becky put her head on one side thoughtfully. ‘Why doesn’t he get out more then?’ she asked. ‘Is he shy with women?’

 

Joe stifled a chuckle. ‘Not my Pa!’ he exclaimed. ‘He’s got a lot of charm with the ladies if he puts his mind to it.’ He then leant close to the girl. ‘Where do you think I get it from?’ he teased.

 

Becky hit him lightly on the arm. ‘Joe Cartwright!’ she exclaimed, pretending to be shocked. ‘Behave yourself!’

 

Joe grinned at her and then leant back against his chair again. ‘Yeah, well I reckon it’d be nice if Pa did get involved with someone,’ he mused. ‘Only problem he has is finding someone I reckon.’

 

‘Well, why don’t you find someone for him?’ teased Becky. ‘You’re good with women after all.’  Her eyes danced with merriment.

 

‘Yeah I am, ain’t I?’ said Joe thoughtfully. ‘After all, no one in our family knows women quite like me.  I reckon I owe it to my Pa to find him someone now that I come to think about it.’

 

‘Like who?’ asked Becky.

 

Joe scratched his chin thoughtfully. ‘I dunno yet,’ he said. ‘I’ll think of someone.’

 

 

===============

 

 

‘I’m sick of him!’ exclaimed Adam. ‘Every time I tell him to behave he does the exact opposite.’  His eyes raked across the crowd angrily. ‘Have you seen Joe, Hoss?’

 

‘Nah, although I can tell ya where he’s likely ta be,’ said his brother calmly. ‘Ya want me ta go check the Saloon?’

 

‘I suppose you’d better,’ said Adam with a sigh. ‘I’ll get the horses ready while you drag him out of there.’  He shook his head as his brother ambled off. ‘That kid!’ he muttered under his breath. ‘One day I’m going to skin his hide.’

 

‘Are you all right Adam?’ asked a soft voice beside him.

 

He turned in surprise at the sound and then smiled and tipped his hat. ‘What?  Oh … yes thank Mrs Harrison,’ he said. ‘Just looking for my younger brother before I go.’

 

Martha Harrison patted him on the arm. ‘Well I hope you find him,’ she said. ‘It’s been a lovely night, hasn’t it?’

 

‘Yes ma’am,’ said Adam, studying the woman carefully. ‘It sure has. Goodnight.’  He watched as she left the room, his eyes widening in surprise. ‘Now why didn’t I think of her before?’ he muttered to himself. His face broke into a grin. ‘Perfect!’ he exclaimed.

 

‘What’s perfect?’ asked Paul Martin, coming up beside him.

 

‘What?  Oh nothing,’ said Adam. ‘Night Paul.’  He left the room with a spring in his step, his heart considerably lighter than it had been moments before, whistling as he began to saddle the three Cartwright horses.

 

Joe tipped his chair back and gulped down his beer, knowing full well that he had limited time until one or other of his brothers would come along to claim him.  He figured after all that dancing he was entitled to a drink or two before being dragged home, and he was determined to get them into him before he was interrupted. ‘I’ll have another one thanks Sadie,’ he said with a smile.

 

The woman standing beside him shook her head. ‘Do your brothers know that you’re in here?’ she admonished.

 

Joe pouted. ‘What difference does that make?’ he said. ‘I’ve got the right to be here if I want.’

 

Sadie shook her head again as she brought Joe another beer. ‘This is the last one,’ she said firmly. ‘I’m not going to be responsible for your father skinning your hide when you get home young man.’

 

Joe giggled as he began to drink the second beer, the effects of the alcohol beginning to make their mark on him. ‘You sound like my Pa when you say that,’ he said. ‘He’s always calling me young man when he’s angry with me.’

 

‘Hmm,’ said Sadie, putting her hands on her hips. ‘Then I think you should take note of what I’m saying,’ she said. ‘You don’t want to be in trouble with your Pa, do you?’

 

‘No ma’am,’ said Little Joe dutifully between mouthfuls of beer. ‘I sure don’t.’  He gave her one of his most charming smiles and Sadie succumbed to it immediately as most women usually did.

 

She patted him on the head in an affectionate way. ‘I’m pleased to hear it,’ she said. ‘Your Pa is too nice a man to make angry, don’t you think?

 

Joe studied her for a minute. ‘Do you like my Pa, Sadie?’ he asked.

 

‘Of course I like your Pa,’ the woman replied. ‘I don’t know anyone who doesn’t.  He’s a lovely man.’

 

Joe leant forward. ‘He likes you too,’ he said in a whisper.

 

‘Does he?’ said Sadie with a chuckle. ‘That’s nice.’  She looked towards the door. ‘Here comes your escort home.’

 

Joe downed his beer quickly before Hoss could reach him and take it out of his hand. ‘Hi Hoss,’ he said, wiping his hand on his sleeve. ‘Come for a drink?’

 

No I ain’t,’ said Hoss firmly, pulling the youngster up by the collar. ‘Now say goodnight to Miss Sadie.

 

‘Goodnight Miss Sadie,’ said Joe dutifully, grabbing his hat as Hoss hauled him away from the table. ‘Real nice talking to ya.’

 

‘Goodnight boys,’ called the woman as she took Joe’s glasses back to the bar.

 

‘Hurry up,’ said Hoss as they got outside. ‘Adam’s waiting with the horses.’

 

Joe gave his brother a pained look. ‘I’m hurrying,’ he said. ‘What’s got into you anyways?  What’s the rush?’

 

‘Pa,’ said Hoss. ‘You know how he worries if we’re late.’  He shoved Joe up onto his horse as they reached it and took his own reins from Adam who was giving Joe a hard stare.

 

‘Don’t look at me like that!’ said Joe indignantly. ‘I only had one drink.’

 

‘Well then how come there was two empty glasses on the table?’ asked Hoss sarcastically. ‘Miss Sadie drinking with ya, was she?’

 

‘Well what if she was?’ asked Joe. ‘Ain’t nothing wrong with her, is there?’

 

‘Never said there was little brother,’ said Hoss. ‘She’s a real fine woman. Now come on.’

 

Joe’s eyes narrowed as he thought about Sadie. ‘I reckon you’re right Hoss,’ he said. ‘She’s a real fine woman.’  He chuckled to himself as they rode down the street.

 

On the ride home, all three Cartwright boys were quiet, each contemplating their plans for their father.

 

 

===============

 

 

‘So how was the social last night boys?’ asked Ben at breakfast the next morning. ‘Did you have a good time?’

 

‘Mmm,’ said Adam thoughtfully as he chewed. ‘It was all right.’

 

‘Just all right?’

 

‘Some of us got to dance more than others,’ Little Joe informed his father. ‘Some of us is more popular.’ Adam shot a dark look across the table at his cocky younger brother, but said nothing.

 

‘So you didn’t dance that much son?’ asked Ben. ‘Why not?’

 

‘He was too busy walking around looking at people,’ Little Joe informed his father. ‘And poking his nose into other people’s business when they was having a good time.’ He gave Adam a satisfied look, which quickly turned to a frown as his father leant forward and said in a low voice, ‘And was there a reason that your brother felt it necessary to poke his nose into your business Joseph?’

 

Joe swallowed and began to concentrate on his plate. ‘Heck no Pa,’ he said. ‘No reason.’  He looked at Adam from under his eyelashes and his brother narrowed his eyes at him in return.

 

‘Well let’s hurry up then,’ announced Ben as he picked up his coffee cup. ‘We don’t want to be late for church, do we boys?’

 

‘I been thinking Pa,’ said Hoss suddenly. ‘It’s been a long time since we all had lunch together at Mrs Marrins’ restaurant. ‘Why don’t we stop off there today after church?’  He gave his father a hopeful look. ‘You could talk ta Mrs Marrins iff’n we did.’

 

Ben looked a little confused. ‘Well I suppose we could,’ he said. ‘But …’

 

‘And she cooks a darned good steak,’ continued Hoss.

 

‘So does Hop Sing,’ interrupted Joe. ‘We could get a darned good steak here for lunch without having to pay for it in some restaurant.’ Hoss kicked his brother under the table. ‘Ow! What was that for?’ demanded Joe, reaching down to rub his ankle.

 

‘What do ya say Pa?’ asked Hoss, ignoring his brother. ‘It’d be good for all of us ta eat together, wouldn’t it?’

 

‘We eat together all the time,’ pouted Joe, still rubbing his ankle. ‘What’s so special about that?’  Hoss glared at him and Joe moved his other leg out from under the table away from his brother’s reach.

 

‘Well it’s a nice idea Hoss,’ said his father. ‘I don’t see why not.  Adam … will you be able to join us, or do you have other plans?’

 

‘Sure,’ said Adam. ‘That’d be fine.’

 

‘How come no one ever asks me?’ demanded Joe indignantly. ‘I might have other plans too.’

 

Ben put down his coffee cup and stared at his youngest son. ‘Do you have other plans Joseph?’ he asked slowly, giving the youngster a meaningful look.

 

‘No,’ said Joe, slumping down in his chair. ‘I reckon not.’  His eyes brightened as he sat up again quickly. ‘Hey!  I just thought of something though.  How bout after we have our lunch in that restaurant we go and get a drink at the Saloon?’  He thought about how Sadie was always there in the afternoons and his father could have some time to see her and maybe talk. ‘I reckon that’d be real fine, don’t you Pa? He added eagerly.

 

Ben raised an eyebrow. ‘Well I would say yes except for one thing Joseph,’ he said.

 

‘Yeah?  What?’

 

‘It is Sunday,’ continued his father. ‘You know how I feel about visiting the Saloon on the Lord’s day.’

 

‘Yeah but …’

 

‘No buts,’ said Ben as he stood up. ‘A nice lunch will be fine and then we’ll come home after that,’ he said firmly. ‘Now come along boys or we’ll be late.’

 

‘I reckon the Lord sometimes had a drink on Sunday,’ muttered Joe under his breath as he followed his father, limping for effect so that Hoss might feel guilty about his hurt ankle. ‘I reckon he wouldn’t mind if we did too.’

 

 

===============

 

 

Adam leant across Joe and whispered to his father who was seated at the other end of the pew. ‘Martha Harrison is here Pa.’

 

Ben looked startled. ‘Um … yes,’ he said, for want of something else to say. ‘She usually comes to church each week son.’  Adam smiled at his father knowingly and sat back in his place again, spending the rest of the service giving some careful thought about how to bring the two of them together afterwards.

 

As they stood up to leave the church at the end of the service, Adam leant over to his father again. ‘Martha Harrison is a nice lady, don’t you think Pa?’

 

Ben looked startled again. ‘Um … well yes, she is,’ he said.  Adam took hold of his father’s arm and steered him towards Martha who was standing near the front fence. ‘Hello Mrs Harrison,’ he said, tipping his hat. ‘Pa and I were just saying how nice it is to see you.’

 

Martha smiled at them both. ‘Lovely to see both of you,’ she said and then turned to leave.

 

‘We’re going to lunch at the restaurant,’ explained Adam. ‘Otherwise we’d have to time to stand and chat.’  He smiled at his father meaningfully, but Ben merely smiled back at him. ‘What are you doing for lunch Mrs Harrison?’ Adam asked finally.

 

Martha Harrison looked a little flustered, Adam’s meaning being very clear to her. ‘Well … actually I’m having lunch with the Thompson’s,’ she said finally.

 

‘What a shame,’ replied Adam. ‘Otherwise you could have joined us.  Couldn’t she Pa?’

 

‘I suppose so,’ said Ben, somewhat startled at his son’s over-exuberance with the woman. ‘It’s nice to see you any time Martha.’

 

‘Well, why don’t you both take a buggy ride some time?’ said Adam. ‘Then you’d have a chance to catch up with each other.’  He smiled at them both.

 

Ben cleared his throat, somewhat embarrassed. ‘Well … if Martha would enjoy it,’ he said finally.

 

Martha smiled at him. ‘You don’t have to take …’

 

‘Oh Pa doesn’t mind,’ interrupted Adam. ‘He’d be happy to take you.  Wouldn’t you Pa?’

 

Ben tipped his hat. ‘Of course,’ he said in a gentlemanly fashion.

 

‘It’s all arranged then,’ said Adam happily. ‘Pa, I could take care of things for you tomorrow at the ranch if you’d like to make it then.’

 

‘Well Martha might be busy,’ said his father, trying not to glare at his son. ‘She might have things to do.’

 

Martha shook her head, trying not to laugh at Ben’s obvious discomfort at the suggestion. ‘I’m free as a bird,’ she said playfully. ‘I’d be happy to go Ben.  Thank you.’

 

‘What was that all about?’ said Ben fiercely as Martha walked away. ‘You were being very obvious about setting me up with her in that way.’

 

Adam shrugged. ‘I know,’ he said apologetically. ‘Only I thought that it was about time you took some time off work,’ he said. ‘You need to have some relaxation now and then Pa.’

 

‘If I want some relaxation, then I’ll take it,’ hissed his father. ‘I don’t need you to …’

 

‘Are we going now?’ asked Hoss as he came over to them. ‘My insides are plumb worn out from waiting fer something to eat.  I can smell that steak cooking from here.’

 

‘All right, all right,’ said Ben testily. He turned to Adam as they walked towards the buggy. ‘And from now on you let me decide when I want some time away from work thank you!’ Adam made a face behind his father’s back as the man climbed up into the buggy. ‘And kindly get your younger brother over here before he pushes that fence over,’ added Ben crossly.

 

Adam looked over to where Joe was standing talking to a few girls, leaning on the fence as he did so. ‘Get him Hoss,’ he said and then climbed up into the buggy next to his disgruntled father.  The way Adam looked at it, it was worth bearing his father’s displeasure for a while if it did the man good in the long term.  Sometimes his Pa just didn’t know what was good for him in his opinion.

 

By the time they were seated in the restaurant however, Ben seemed to have regained his even temper again and seemed to be ready to enjoy his meal. ‘We’ll have four steaks with all the trimmings,’ he said to Bertha Marrins. ‘Thank you.’

 

‘Sure does smell great out in that kitchen Mrs Marrins,’ exclaimed Hoss. ‘I reckon you’re the best darned cook in these parts.  Don’t ya reckon so Pa?’

 

‘Bertha is a wonderful cook,’ agreed his father pleasantly. ‘I’ve always said so.’

 

‘Yeah ya have, haven’t ya?’ said Hoss happily as Bertha left to get their meals. ‘I reckon she’d be great ta have on hand all the time, don’t you?’

 

‘If we didn’t have Hop Sing,’ said his father pleasantly. ‘Joseph get your elbows off the table please. Hop Sing is a wonderful cook as well Hoss. We’re lucky to have him at The Ponderosa.’

 

‘Yes.  Don’t let him hear you talking like that,’ laughed Adam. ‘He’d likely threaten to go back to China quick smart!’  They all laughed.

 

‘Well of course old Hop Sing is great,’ enthused Hoss. ‘I just meant that it’d be nice ta have a woman’s cooking sometimes is all.’ He looked at his father hopefully. ‘I reckon that Mrs Marrins kinda misses cooking fer a bunch of men since her husband died.’

 

‘What on earth are you talking about?’ said Ben. ‘Joseph, I said to get your elbows off the table please!  She cooks for men every day here at the restaurant, doesn’t she?’

 

Hoss scratched his head. ‘Well I reckon,’ he said finally. ‘But I guess it ain’t the same as cooking fer your own family is what I been trying ta say. Mmm … That sure smells great ma’am!’  He grinned at Bertha as she set his plate down in front of him.

 

‘Thank you Hoss,’ she said. ‘I brought your plate first because you looked so hungry.  Here you go Ben, here’s yours as well.’

 

‘See that Pa?’ said Hoss, nudging his father as the woman left to get the other two plates. ‘She done brought yours first too.  I reckon she’s sorta gone on you.’

 

‘Hoss don’t be silly,’ said his father as he picked up his fork. ‘Joseph if you don’t get those elbows off the table young man, you’ll be eating your meal outside!’

 

‘Sorry Pa,’ said Joe absently. ‘What did you say?’

 

‘What is the matter with you today?’ asked his father irritably. ‘You seem to be in a dream.’

 

‘Just thinking is all,’ said Joe, continuing to stare out of the window.

 

‘Well stop thinking and start eating,’ said his father as Bertha put down two more plates. ‘Thank you Bertha.  This is delicious.’

 

‘You’re welcome Ben,’ said Bertha with a smile at him. ‘Anything for my favourite family.’

 

Hoss nudged his father again as the woman left the room. ‘Hear that Pa?’ he said happily. ‘I told ya she was gone on you!’

 

‘Oh for heavens sake Hoss,’ said his father. ‘Eat your meal and stop carrying on about it!’

 

Hoss began to eat happily, winking at Adam across the table as he did so.  Adam stared back at his brother for a moment, an uneasy feeling crossing his mind.

 

‘Adam?  What’s that frown for?’ asked his father.

 

‘Nothing Pa,’ said Adam, still eyeing off Hoss who was eating his food with great relish.

 

‘I sure don’t know what’s gotten into you boys today,’ said Ben with a shake of his head. ‘You’re all acting very strangely.’

 

‘Huh?’ said Joe. ‘I ain’t acting strangely Pa.’  He jumped up suddenly. ‘There’s Sadie!’ he exclaimed, pointing out of the window to the Saloon opposite where, sure enough, Sadie was walking along the sidewalk towards the Silver Dollar.

 

‘So what?’ replied Adam. ‘She always works in there in the afternoons, doesn’t she?’

 

‘I guess so,’ said Joe. ‘Only …’

 

‘Only what?  Sit down Joseph,’ said his father sternly.

 

Joe sat down. ‘Only …  she’s kinda nice, ain’t she Pa?’

 

‘I suppose so,’ said his father with a sigh. ‘What is going on here?’  He looked around the table suspiciously.

 

‘Nuthin Pa,’ said Joe innocently. ‘I was just thinking how nice Miss Sadie is, that’s all.’  He grinned at his father who gave him a suspicious look in return. ‘Don’t you think so Pa?’ the youngster persisted.

 

Ben sighed. ‘Yes son, she’s very nice,’ he said. ‘Now can we please finish our meals?’

 

Joe’s grin became wider as he ignored his father’s remark. ‘I reckon you should go out with her Pa,’ he persisted.

 

‘Jumping Jehosaphat!’ shouted Ben. ‘How many times are you boys going to persist in this?’  He pointed at Adam. ‘First you try to set me up with Martha Harrison, then you …’ he pointed to Hoss. ‘You keep on about how Bertha would make a good addition to our household.  And now you …’ He pointed to Little Joe. ‘You’re trying to get me to go out with a saloon girl!’  He threw down his napkin. ‘I’ve had just about enough!’ he said. ‘I’m going to pay the bill now and I’d appreciate the three of you meeting me outside as soon as you’re done here.’  He stood up. ‘And I’ll hear no more about women of any kind, thank you very much!’

 

The three Cartwrights watched their father walk over towards the kitchen in silence. ‘What?’ asked Joe finally. ‘I was only saying how nice Sadie is.’  He shot a hurt look in his father’s direction.

 

‘Don’t be so stupid Joe,’ said Hoss. ‘She ain’t the kind of woman fer Pa no how.’

 

‘Why not?’ asked Joe defensively.

 

‘She’s a saloon gal,’ replied Hoss. ‘Pa wouldn’t be seen dead with the likes of her.’

 

‘You said last night that she’s a right fine woman,’ said Joe.

 

‘And she is,’ replied Hoss. ‘Just not the sort fer Pa is all.  Sides, I can’t see a saloon gal fitting into The Ponderosa as our step-ma, can you Adam?’

 

‘I don’t know,’ said Adam thoughtfully. ‘Pa married Marie after all and she worked in a …’ he stopped as he realised what he’d said.

 

Joe looked shocked. ‘My ma wasn’t a saloon gal!’ he declared.

 

‘I didn’t mean that she was,’ replied Adam carefully backtracking. ‘Only that she didn’t … well I mean … she wasn’t exactly …’ He turned and frowned at Hoss to deflect the conversation away in a different direction. ‘Anyway, I don’t know why you’re trying to push Bertha Marrins at Pa.  She’s not the sort he’d go for.’

 

‘Really?’ replied Hoss. ‘And I suppose you do know the sort he’d go fer, huh?’

 

‘Of course,’ said Adam smugly. ‘I arranged it all the morning.  He’s taking Martha Harrison out for a buggy ride tomorrow if you must know.’

 

‘Widow Harrison?’ squeaked Joe. ‘She’s … she’s so …’

 

‘So what?’

 

‘So … prim and proper,’ said Joe. ‘She ain’t Pa’s type!’

 

‘I think she is,’ replied Adam haughtily. ‘She’s a very intelligent woman if you must know and she and Pa would have a lot in common.’

 

‘Yeah? Like what?’ asked Hoss.

 

‘Like … like books and culture and …’ Adam waved his hands in the air. ‘Lots of things,’ he said.

 

‘Sounds like someone who you’d be interested in … not Pa,’ said Joe grumpily. ‘I still reckon Sadie would be good for him.  She’d show him a good time.’

 

‘Yeah,’ said Hoss sarcastically. ‘A real good time! Face it Joe, she ain’t the sort of woman fer Pa.  Now Bertha Marrins ….’

 

‘I’m sick of you two carrying on about this,’ interrupted Adam. ‘I’ve already told you that it’s all arranged for Pa to go out with Martha Harrison.  He’ll enjoy her company and that’s an end to it. Understand?’

 

‘Yeah,’ said Hoss with a shifty look at his father and Bertha standing in the corner talking. ‘If ya say so Adam.’

 

‘Yeah,’ said Joe absently, staring out the window at Sadie across the street. ‘Whatever.’

 

 

===============

 

 

‘So did you have a good time?’ Adam asked his father with a grin as he took the reins from him. ‘

 

Ben stared at his son for a moment. ‘Actually I did,’ he said.

 

‘See?’ replied Adam jubilantly. ‘I told you that she was a lovely lady didn’t I?’

 

‘I know that she is a nice woman Adam,’ said Ben. ‘I never disputed that.  Put the buggy away for me please.’  He gave his son a long appraising stare before turning towards the house.  Adam began to whistle as he unhitched the buggy. After a few moments, Hoss rode into the yard and dismounted.

 

‘What have you go there?’ asked Adam, spying a tin in his brother’s hand.

 

‘Just some homemade cookies from Mrs Marrins’ restaurant,’ said Hoss giving his brother a wink. ‘I asked her to bake some for Pa.  I told her how much he likes her baking.’

 

Adam shook his head. ‘Hoss I thought you understood,’ he said. ‘Pa isn’t the least bit interested in Mrs Marrins. I told you that I’ve fixed him up with Martha Harrison.  He’s just now got back from a buggy ride with her.’

 

Hoss looked smug. ‘Yeah? Well I reckon after he gets a taste of these cookies he might just prove you wrong Adam,’ he said.

 

‘A few cookies isn’t going to convince him brother,’ replied Adam.

 

Hoss frowned. ‘Why is it that you’ve always got ta be right about everything?’ he said testily.

 

‘I do not have to be right about everything!’

 

‘Yes ya do,’ replied Hoss. ‘Anyways, I know Pa is in fer a treat with these cookies and Bertha Marrins is gonna suit him just fine.’

 

‘Suit yourself,’ Adam shrugged. ‘But I still think you’re wasting your time brother.’

 

‘We’ll see bout that won’t we?’ retorted Hoss.

 

‘See bout what?’ said a voice behind them and both brothers turned to see Joe sitting on his horse smiling down at them. ‘See bout what?’ he asked again as he slid down form the saddle.

 

‘Older brother here reckons that Bertha Marrins ain’t the right type fer Pa,’ said Hoss. ‘He reckons he knows better as usual.’

 

‘He’s right,’ said Joe.

 

Adam grinned at this unexpected support. ‘See?’ he said to Hoss smugly. ‘Even Joe knows that Martha Harrison is the right sort of woman to suit Pa.’

 

‘I don’t know nothing of the sort,’ retorted Joe with a snort. ‘I don’t told you already that she’s a mite too prim and proper for Pa’s liking. Sadie’s the one for him and I aim to fix em up together.’

 

Adam shook his head. ‘Sadie!’ he snorted.

 

‘Why not?’ said Joe defensively. ‘She’s pretty and right good company.  She’d give Pa a laugh or two which is exactly what he needs.’

 

‘I done told ya Joe.  Sadie ain’t exactly the type ta fit in round here,’ said Hoss. ‘Now Bertha Marrins, she’s right lady.’

 

‘Who said anything about fitting in round here?’ interrupted Joe. ‘I’m just interested in Pa having a good time is all. You two seem bound and determined ta get him married off or something.’

 

‘Well it wouldn’t hurt him,’ said Adam. ‘Now Martha Harrison.’

 

‘Bertha Marrins,’ interrupted Hoss, glaring at his older brother.

 

‘Sadie!’ shouted Joe. ‘I done told ya Sadie is the one fer Pa!’

 

‘Boys!’ shouted Ben from the front porch. ‘What is going on out there?  I can hear your yelling from inside!’

 

‘Nothing Pa,’ said Adam, glaring at both his brothers.’

 

‘Well keep your voice down please!’ shouted Ben.

 

‘Hey Pa!  I got something for ya!’ said Hoss, making a face at his two brothers before waling over to his father. ‘I was in town today and Bertha Marrins said …’  His voice trailed away as he and his father disappeared into the house together.

 

‘I do not always have to be right!’ said Adam grumpily as he led the two horses into the barn.

 

‘Ya do so!’ shouted Joe after him. ‘Anyways, we’ll see who wins this one brother.’  His eyes narrowed craftily. ‘I aim to set Pa up with Sadie and then we’ll see who’s right.’

 

 

===============

 

 

‘Just one drink Pa?’ pleaded Joe. ‘After all I done all that lifting of the supplies all by myself seeing as how Hoss and Adam were too lazy to come into town today to help.’

 

Ben lifted an eyebrow. ‘Your brothers didn’t come into town today because I didn’t ask them to young man,’ he said. ‘And you loaded all the supplies simply because it’s your turn to do it.’

 

Joe thought for a moment. ‘Yeah, well I suppose that’s true,’ he acknowledged. ‘Still … ya can’t deny me one drink can ya?’  He looked at his father pleadingly.

 

‘I can,’ replied Ben sternly and then shook his head. ‘All right.  I suppose you’ve earned it Joseph.  I must say that I haven’t seen you work so hard in a long time.’

 

Joe beamed at his father. ‘Thanks Pa,’ he said. ‘Come on then.’

 

‘You go along son.  I want to go and see Roy Coffee while I’m in town.’

 

Joe’s smile turned into a frown. ‘But … but I thought you might come with me,’ he said. His eyes twinkled. ‘I’ll buy you a drink.’

 

Ben’s eyes widened. ‘What?’ he said. ‘Don’t tell me you actually have some money Joseph?’

 

Joe looked hurt. ‘Yeah,’ he said. ‘I don’t always spend it all ya know Pa.’

 

‘Don’t you? Well I’d better just take you up on that offer then son.  It’s a rare occasion when I’m treated to a drink by one of my sons.’

 

‘Yeah,’ said Joe, not quite sure if that was a compliment or not.  He led his father into the Silver Dollar Saloon and they sat down at a table in the corner. ‘Two beers thanks Sadie!’ he called out and then tipped his chair back and rested himself against wall. ‘This is sure great, ain’t it Pa?’ he said happily.

 

‘I suppose so.’

 

‘Sure is,’ mused Joe. ‘Cold beer, good company and …’ His eyes twinkled as he looked at Sadie getting the drinks. ‘Pretty women,’ he finished. ‘What more could a man ask for, huh?’

 

‘Mmm.’

 

‘That Sadie sure is one pretty woman, ain’t she?’ said Joe casually.

 

‘I suppose so.’

 

‘She’s right beautiful if you ask me,’ persisted Joe.

 

‘Joseph, she’s far too old for you,’ said Ben sternly. ‘And I’ve told you before what I think about you flirting with saloon …’ He stopped abruptly. ‘Oh.  Thank you Sadie.’

 

Sadie smiled as she put the beers down on the table. ‘That’ll be two bits thanks Mr Cartwright,’ she said.

 

Ben indicated Joe with his thumb. ‘Joe is paying,’ he said.

 

Sadie’s eyes widened. ‘Really?  Oh.  Well then, that’ll be two bits thanks Joe.’

 

Joe took the money from his pocket and handed it to the woman with a smile.  In his opinion it was worth two beers to fix his father up with such a charming and beautiful woman such as Sadie. ‘Thanks,’ he said with one of his devastating smiles. ‘Care to join us?’

 

Sadie sat down. ‘Don’t mind if I do,’ she said. ‘Business is a bit slow today.’

 

‘Get yourself a drink,’ said Joe generously, handing her some money. ‘On me.’

 

‘Thanks,’ the woman replied happily. ‘I’ll be back in a minute.’

 

‘Joseph!’ whispered his father as the woman left to get her drink. ‘What on earth are you doing?’

 

‘Just offering a pretty lady a drink Pa,’ replied Joe. ‘Don’t you always tell us to be generous?’

 

‘Well yes,’ said Ben. ‘But … Please have a seat,’ he said as Sadie came back.  He tried not to glare at his youngest son as the woman made herself comfortable.

 

‘Sadie was telling me the other day how she’s never seen The Ponderosa,’ said Joe, launching straight into his campaign to set his father up. ‘Seems a shame that she ain’t.’

 

‘Mmm,’ said Ben, studying his beer.

 

‘I reckon it might be nice to invite her out to have a look around.  You’d like that, wouldn’t you Sadie?’ asked Joe.

 

Sadie’s eyes lit up. ‘Oh I would!’ she exclaimed. ‘I’ve heard that it’s beautiful!’

 

‘It’s right pretty at this time of year,’ said Joe eagerly. ‘Pa could show you round some time, couldn’t you Pa?’

 

Ben dropped the pretence of trying not to glare at his son. ‘Well yes,’ he said between his gritted teeth. ‘I’d be happy to.’  His expression however didn’t match his words, and he looked as if he were about to throttle Joe, a fact that his son seemed to be oblivious to.

 

‘Well I reckon …’ began Joe.

 

‘I think it’s time we got on our way,’ interrupted Ben, draining the last of his beer and standing up. ‘Come along Joseph.’

 

‘But I ain’t finished my beer yet!’ declared the youngster.

 

‘I said to come along Joseph,’ said Ben firmly, reaching down and grabbing his son by the arm. He tipped his hat to Sadie as Joe took a last swig of his beer. ‘Good day ma’am,’ he said politely before dragging Joe towards the door. ‘I’ll be having words with you on the way home young man,’ he said in a low voice as they left the saloon.

 

‘I told you she was pretty, didn’t I Pa?’ asked Joe, looking over his shoulder at Sadie and waving to her over the swinging door. ‘I was right, wasn’t I?’

 

‘In the buckboard Joseph,’ said Ben firmly. ‘Get!’

 

Joe looked at his father strangely.  For some reason the man seemed to be upset about something, but for the life of him he couldn’t imagine what it might be.  He shrugged and climbed up into the buckboard without a word.

 

 

===============

 

 

‘Nice meal Hop Sing,’ said Hoss with a grin at the cook. ‘Very nice indeed!’ Hop Sing returned the look before retreating into the kitchen with the empty plates. ‘Yes sir,’ said Hoss, leaning back and rubbing his stomach happily. ‘That was a right tasty meal.  Nearly as good as the one we got in Mrs Marrins’ restaurant the other day.’

 

‘Don’t let Hop Sing hear you say that,’ said his father. ‘He’ll on the next boat to China if he does.’

 

‘Oh I don’t mean nothing by it,’ said Hoss. ‘I just meant that Mrs Marrins …’

 

Ben put up his hand. ‘Hoss please!’ he said. ‘I am sick and tired of being told about that woman’s culinary expertise.’

 

Hoss frowned momentarily, wondering what his father was talking about. ‘Yeah,’ he said finally. ‘But her cooking …’

 

‘Hoss!” said Ben. ‘Enough.  Between you and your …’ he shot Joe a stern look. ‘Your younger brother here, I’ve just about had enough of all this. I do not need these women rammed down my throat every time I turn around!’

 

Adam looked smug. ‘I totally agree Pa,’ he said. ‘It seems to me that these two have done nothing but embarrass you.’

 

Ben turned on him. ‘Oh?  And you haven’t?’ he said. ‘What about that buggy ride you fixed up for me with Martha Harrison?’

 

‘But you said that you enjoyed it,’ declared Adam defensively. ‘You can’t deny that you didn’t have a good time.’

 

Ben nodded. ‘True,’ he said. ‘I did have a good time.  I’d just prefer to pick my own outings in my own time, thank you very much.’  He flung down his napkin. ‘Now I’ll thank you all to stop organizing my life for me!’  He strode away from the table and over to his desk.

 

‘See what you’ve done now?’ said Joe. ‘You’ve upset Pa Adam.’

 

‘Yeah,’ agreed Hoss. ‘You shouldn’t have set him up like that.’

 

‘I’ve upset Pa?’ spluttered Adam. ‘What about you two?  Talk about embarrassing him!  Why you two nitwits …’

 

‘Who you calling a nitwit?’ demanded Joe.

 

‘You!’ hissed Adam. ‘Anyone who tries to fix Pa up with a saloon gal is a nitwit in my books!’

 

Hoss shook his head. ‘This ain’t getting us nowhere,’ he interrupted. ‘I reckon it’s up to Pa to choose which one he likes.’

 

‘I agree,’ said Adam. ‘You heard him say how much he enjoyed Mrs Harrison’s company.  I’d say it was fairly clear who he’s chosen already.’

 

‘We’ll see about that,’ said Hoss.

 

‘Yeah!’ said Joe. ‘We’ll see about that!’

 

 

===============

Mrs Martha Harrison smiled as she drove into the front yard and saw Adam standing there waiting there for her. ‘Welcome to The Ponderosa,’ he said as he helped her down from her buggy.

 

‘Thank you Adam,’ the woman replied. ‘It was lovely of your father to ask me.’

 

Adam cleared his throat. ‘Yes,’ he said. ‘He did so enjoy the buggy ride you both had the other afternoon.  He hasn’t stopped talking about it.’

 

‘Really?’ Martha replied.

 

‘Yes,’ continued Adam. ‘In fact …’  He frowned as Hoss drove into the front yard with Bertha Marrins beside him. ‘Well what do you know?’ he muttered under his breath.

 

‘Adam!’ called out Hoss. ‘What are you doing here?”  He tipped his hat to Martha Harrison. ‘Afternoon ma,’ he said.

 

‘Good afternoon Hoss,’ said Martha with a smile. ‘Bertha!  How lovely to see you!’

 

Adam drew Hoss aside while the two women were chatting, ‘What have you got her here for?’ he whispered.

 

‘Same as you I reckon,’ said Hoss with a glare at his brother.

 

‘Well you’ll have to get rid of her,’ said Adam firmly. ‘Martha is here to go on a buggy ride with Pa.’

 

‘Does Pa know that?’

 

‘Well no … not exactly,’ admitted Adam.

 

‘He done told you before he wanted to fix up his own meetings with women,’ said Hoss. ‘He ain’t gonna be too happy with you.’

 

‘Well what do you call this?’ whispered Adam, indicating Bertha with his hand. ‘You’ve done exactly the same thing.’

 

‘Mine is different,’ declared Hoss. ‘Mrs Marrins done come out here ta discuss food with Pa.’

 

‘Food?  What on earth for?’

 

‘For the party that Pa is organising,’ said Hoss. ‘Mrs Marrins is gonna do the cooking so they’ve got lots to discuss.’

 

‘What party?’

 

‘The party I told her we’re having,’ said Hoss smugly.

 

‘Does Pa know about this party?’

 

‘Well … not exactly.  But he’ll like the idea,’ Hoss said confidently.

 

‘Hoss …’

 

At that moment Joe came out of the barn, his eyes bulging at the sight of the two women who were engaged in animated conversation by the buggy. ‘What’s going on here,’ he said, sidling up to his brothers. ‘What are them two doing here?’

 

‘They’re here to see Pa,’ said Adam.

 

‘Together?’

 

‘Well of course not!’ his brother retorted. ‘Hoss is just going to take Mrs Marrins home.’  He gave Hoss a meaningful look and then frowned when his brother shook his head.

 

‘No I ain’t,’ he said firmly.

 

‘Um … Adam,’ Joe said.

 

‘Be quiet.  Hoss you have to,’ persisted Adam. ‘Pa can’t entertain them both at the same time.’

 

‘Um … Adam,’ persisted Joe.

 

‘Quiet!’

 

‘I don’t see why I should take mine home,’ declared Hoss. ‘You take yours home.’

 

‘Mine was here first!’

 

‘Only just.  Anyways, that don’t count.’

 

‘Um … Adam.’

 

Adam turned on his youngest brother. ‘What?’

 

‘I need to tell you something.’

 

‘Well?’

 

‘I sorta … I mean … Miss Sadie is coming out to see Pa this afternoon as well.’

 

‘What? What on earth for?’

 

Joe looked defensive. ‘Well Pa kinda invited her,’ he said. ‘When we was in the Saloon.  He said that he’d be happy to show her The Ponderosa at some stage and I told her that he’d be happy to do it this afternoon.’

 

‘You what?  And of course Pa knows nothing about this either?’  Joe shook his head and they all turned to see Sadie riding into the front yard, waving happily at Joe.

 

‘What are we gonna do?’ asked Joe anxiously.

 

Adam sighed. ‘Seems we don’t have much option but to escort all three ladies into the house and see what Pa makes of it all. I think our Pa is about to make his choice,’ he said.

 

Hoss swallowed. ‘I hate ta think what he’s gonna make of us,’ he muttered. Joe nodded as they all walked forward to escort the women into the house.

 

As they opened the front door, all three Cartwrights were nonplussed to see their father sitting by the fireplace with Mrs Margaret Jenkins beside him.  Both of them were drinking coffee and Hop Sing was offering a plate of cakes around. Ben put down his cup and stared at everyone as they entered.

 

‘Well,’ he said after a moment. ‘What do we have here?’  His three sons stood silently and merely stared at him. ‘Ladies,’ said Ben. ‘Seeing as how my sons seem to be lost for words at the moment, may I ask you inside. Hop Sing?  They’re coats if you don’t mind?’

 

Suddenly there was a flurry of activity as all four women seated themselves around the fireplace and began happily chatting. ‘Hop Sing … more coffee cups if you don’t mind,’ said Ben in measured tones. ‘It seems that we have quite a gathering here.’  He glared at his three sons who were still rooted to the spots where they had first entered the room. They watched as their father and Hop Sing served all four women with coffee and cakes.

 

‘If you will excuse me for a few moments ladies,’ said Ben when everyone had enough food and drink. ‘I need to speak to my sons for a moment.’  He shot the three boys a glare that made them all swallow. ‘Outside now!’ he said.

 

Ben strode outside, his hands on his hips, followed meekly by Hoss and then Adam. Joe brought up the rear, trying to look as inconspicuous as possible by hiding behind his brothers. Hoss reached behind him and dragged Joe out until he was forced to stand between them both.

 

‘Well?’ said Ben. ‘I’m waiting!’  There was silence. ‘I’m waiting to know why there are suddenly four women in my house!’ he said, trying his best not to shout.

 

‘You brought one of em Pa,’ squeaked Joe. ‘You can’t blame us for all four.’  He swallowed as he saw the expression on his father’s face and shut his mouth quickly.

 

‘Mrs Harrison wanted to go on another buggy ride with you Pa,’ explained Adam. ‘I told her that it would probably be all right.’

 

‘Oh you did, did you?’ said Ben. ‘I take it then that it wasn’t your idea to invite her?’ Adam shrugged and said nothing. ‘I thought I told you before that I am quite capable of organising my own social engagements?’ said Ben.

 

Yeah but we didn’t know that you could Pa,’ interrupted Joe. ‘We didn’t know that you liked Widow Jenkins.’

 

‘Her name is Mrs Jenkins to you young man,’ spat his father. ‘And whom I like is really no business of yours is it?

 

 

‘No sir.’

 

‘But Pa you always said that she was boring,’ protested Adam.

 

‘Did I?  I don’t remember saying that.  Anyway … that is none of your business,’ said Ben angrily. He turned to Hoss. ‘Judging by the way you’ve been carrying on about her cooking, I’d say that Bertha Marrins being here is your idea?’

 

‘Yeah,’ admitted Hoss. ‘Only I didn’t know that you’d be having your own company Pa.’

 

‘And why, pray tell, is she here?’

 

Hoss swallowed before replying. ‘Um … for the party,’ he muttered.

 

‘For the party?’ said Ben, nonplussed. ‘What party?’

 

‘The party she’s gonna do the cooking for,’ said Hoss, swallowing again.

 

‘The party she’s … Jumping Jephosophat! What on earth are you talking about Hoss?’

 

Hoss gave Adam a pleading look, but his brother only crossed his arms in front of him and returned the look with a smug one of his own. ‘W… Well,’ stammered Hoss. ‘It were the only thing I could think of ta get her out here ta see you Pa.’ He gave his father a hopeful grin. ‘I reckon she really likes ya Pa.’

 

Ben crossed his own arms in front of his chest in imitation of Adam. ‘Does she?’ he said sarcastically. ‘And what has that got to do with you?’

 

Hoss swallowed. ‘Um … nothing?’ he said.

 

Ben nodded. ‘That’s exactly right … nothing!’ he said. ‘Now you two get those women out of there do you hear?’

 

‘How would you suggest we do that Pa?’ asked Adam.

 

Ben pointed a finger at him. ‘I don’t rightly know,’ he said. ‘How are you going to do that?’  Adam shrugged and said nothing. ‘Perhaps that educated mind of yours will come up with something?’ added his father sarcastically.

 

Little Joe took a small step forward. ‘Um … Pa?’ he said.

 

Ben turned to him. ‘What?’

 

‘Um … what about Sadie?’

 

‘Yes Joseph.  What about Sadie?’

 

‘Um … she’s kinda expecting you to take her round The Ponderosa for a look.’

 

‘Is she? And why is that?’

 

‘Because you invited her.’  Joe took a step backwards again as Ben leaned towards him.

 

‘What?’

 

‘Well you did!’ declared Joe. ‘When we was in the saloon, remember?’

 

‘I did nothing of the kind!’

 

‘Yes you did.  You said that you’d be happy to show her The Ponderosa sometime.’

 

‘And you just assumed that I would do it now?’

 

‘Um … yes sir.’

 

Ben pointed his finger under Joe’s nose. ‘Well you can just unassume it!’ he thundered. ‘I am sick and tired of you three organising my life for me!  Did it ever occur to you that I might like to do that myself?’

 

‘We was only trying to help you Pa!’ protested Little Joe and took another step backwards as Ben glared at him.

 

‘Well if you want to help you can stop assuming that I need female companionship in my life!’ Ben shouted. ‘I am quite capable of organising my own life thank you!  After all … I have been married three times!’

 

‘We know that Pa,’ said Adam. ‘But …’

 

‘But nothing!  Did it ever occur to the three of you that I might like to choose my own companion?’

 

‘Well of course but …’

 

‘We didn’t think you had anyone Pa,’ Little Joe finished for his brother. ‘Widow Jenkins … I mean Mr Jenkins is a real nice lady Pa.’

 

‘Yes she is,’ said Ben. ‘And she must be in there right at this moment wondering what is going on.  Now I am going to escort her home and I suggest that you three think real quick about what you’re going to say to those three poor women in there.’  He turned to go into the house and then stopped. ‘And did it ever occur to you to look at the choices you’ve made?’ he asked sarcastically. ‘Those three seem more suited to what you’d like in a woman than I would. Think about it!’  He marched into the house, leaving his three sons standing nonplussed on the front porch.

 

‘What did he mean by that?’ asked Hoss finally.

 

Adam shrugged. ‘I guess when you look at it,’ he admitted. ‘I was looking at Mrs Harrison for Pa because she is interested in the things I like I suppose.’

 

‘I done told you that!’ declared Little Joe smugly. ‘And Hoss likes Mrs Marrins cause of her cooking.  That’s what he likes.’

 

‘And Sadie?’ asked Hoss, scratching his head.

 

‘She’s a good time girl,’ said Adam, indicating Joe with his thumb. ‘Need I say more?  No … I guess Pa was right.  We should have trusted him to choose his own woman.  After all, Mrs Jenkins is nice.’

 

‘That she is,’ agreed Hoss. ‘She’ll make a good addition to The Ponderosa.’

 

Joe frowned. ‘Who said anything about an addition?’ he asked. ‘Pa ain’t gonna marry her, is he?’

 

‘Who can tell little brother,’ sad Adam smugly. ‘Who can tell?’

 

 

 

===============

 

 

‘I’m so sorry about that Margaret,’ said Ben as they drove away from the house. ‘I had no idea that the boys had invited all three of them to the house at the one time.’

 

Margaret Jenkins laughed. ‘Don’t worry about it Ben.  We all had a good laugh about it while you were outside with the boys.  None of those women were really interested in you, you know.  It was all your sons’ idea.’

 

Ben breathed a sigh of relief. ‘Well that’s good to know,’ he said. ‘I’d hate to have hurt any of their feelings.’  He smiled at the woman beside him. ‘I can’t tell you how grateful I am to you Margaret for helping me with all of this. Those boys of mine needed to understand that they don’t need to set me up with anyone.’

 

‘Don’t mention it Ben,’ she said. ‘I was glad to help.  Besides, never let it be said that I turned down the chance of one of Hop Sing’s wonderful afternoon teas.’  She sidled closer to him on the seat. ‘I am grateful that you chose me to help you though.’

 

‘You are?’

 

‘Yes.  I was wondering why you did to be honest.’

 

‘Well … you were available and …’

 

‘That’s true,’ she said. ‘I am available.’

 

‘And … you were ….’ Ben swallowed nervously as Margaret put her hand on his knee. ‘And …’

 

Go on Ben,’ she said softly. ‘Please go on.’

The End